#THIS WOUND UP SO LONG YALL I WROTE THIS IN TWO DAYS
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I have to write a novel for class, and I have an idea bouncing off my skull for years. And I need to share it.
Excerpt:
When valley died, he expected to see nothing. For that to just be it. he wasnt one to belive in heaven or hell, not really. The after life was something he didn't see possible. But one moment, he felt the blood pouring from them gun wound in his chest, near his lungs he thought. Just another man who got mugged, thought he could fight, and ended up on the wrong side of the gun.
What was so odd was it was dark, and cold. Then he heard the sound of tapping. The blow of wind against his skin, something cold on his back. Then he opened hiss eyes.
THE ACTUALLY UDEA:
Sometimes when someone dies, they become a God of their own right, and the main character, who I haven't chose a name for, got to be the God of stories. And got their own library in between time and space, and they are to spend their unending afterlife, caring after the infinite library that has every person who has ever lived story, and every book to ever be written. This space between time and space means one day you will get elvises story, and the next you will get a hermit in 200bc's story. And it never ends, you always are getting new books. But. They are to spend the rest of eternity, alone. After so so so long of being alone. For some reason, valley, an autistic trans man, with so many years of masking, and being pract8cally tortured by society like anyone else who fits those two things, shows up in this library. Where he isn't supposed to be. And the entire thing, is, valley is adjusting to being NG dead, the other guy is trying to learn how to be human again, while they're both stuck in this limbo, with no explanation as of why, and slowly, they fall in love due to their isolation,while learning the secrets to the very world from the stories of people who knew far too much.
Did I mention these domains of sorts make you look like your true self? How you see yourself, when there is no rules to reality, your looks tend to shift into something that fits you, weather you realize or not. And every so often, if you wander deep enough in, you'll find things from what used to be your life, you'll find clocks, and mirrors, and you'll find photos from places and moments unexplainable.
NOW, I wanted to share this, to see how tumblr will react to this thought, it has to be 150 pages long before January 15th, and it can't be over by then, and I'm kinda wondering, if yall like this idea, if I should start posting about progress, and these little oc guys, and world building, and all that, cuz I'm nuts
Also I'm looking for pointers from people who actually write longer things!! The longest thing I wrote was 15k words over 8 months, so, I'm really just looking for advice, helpful criticism, and to see if this is some yall will want to hear about!!
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tourettesdog · 2 years ago
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Something In-Between
AO3 Link
TW: character death (in that funky Danny Fenton way), injury, emetophobia, blood/ectoplasm.
Word count: 9704
Summary:
Danny walked into the portal alone. Fortunately, Jazz was there when he came out.
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The Fenton household was strange, though it had its own sense of order. As much order as two ectobiologists could maintain, with two children nestled awkwardly between their work. Jack and Maddie Fenton spent most of their days down in their basement lab. They were married to their work almost as much as each other. Twenty years of research drove their hands and hearts. Each day promised another chance to make a new discovery in their field. 
Their children grew used to the cacophony of lab work. The banging of sheet metal, the whirr of drills, the crackle of blowtorches. They kept mostly upstairs or out of the house, avoiding the noise. Waiting for the moment their parents finished their work and returned to them.
It was an old song and dance, one the children learned from an early age. The eldest, Jazz, waited anxiously for each wave of their creativity. Whenever she caught that manic gleam in her mother’s eye that spoke of inspiration, she would step up to pick up the slack. Their parents hardly cared for themselves when enthralled with their work, let alone Jazz and her little brother, Danny.
Normally, those sparks of inspiration would burn brightly for a couple of weeks at most before either fizzling away in defeat, or culminating into success. Jazz and Danny knew not to expect that same pattern when their parents began construction of their life’s work: The Portal.
Those twenty years produced many smaller projects, but everything came second to the portal (everything). Weeks turned into months and each day of it saw more progress. A gaping maw in the earth, lined with metal and spilling wires. 
As the summer dragged on and their parents fell deeper and deeper into their work, Jazz and Danny waited. They waited through June, and July, and soon it was August. School would start in two week's time, and Danny looked forward to starting his first year of high school. He spent most of the summer avoiding the house, hanging out with his friends, Sam and Tucker. It was easy to forget about the portal over burgers and fries, or trips to the movies. They rotated houses for sleepovers– avoiding Danny’s when they could. 
Danny and Jazz were both home when their parents finished construction of the portal. The cheers that emitted from the basement practically shook the entire house. Jack ran upstairs before they could move, ushering both of them down to the lab.
It had been weeks since Danny went down there. What small measure of order the lab once held had gone. Tools and spare parts littered the space, strewn haphazardly across the stone floor. Danny picked his way cautiously across the minefield of spills and loose bolts. 
The portal yawned before him, a massive hexagonal tunnel through the basement wall. Danny couldn’t see very far into the tunnel. It lay cloaked in shadow, waiting.
Jack and Maddie stood side by side, facing their children with wide, unhinged grins. Their jumpsuits were dirty, stained with oil and grime. Dark bags lingered under their eyes, and Danny wondered if they had even slept the last two nights. Jack picked up a power cable, holding it high for all to see. 
“At long last, the Fenton Ghost Portal is complete. We’re about to make history!” he exclaimed, turning to view the portal with a reverent expression. 
The air felt charged with energy as he launched into a speech that went in one of Danny’s ears and out the other. Research, ghosts, dimensions– Danny found the portal far more interesting than anything his father had to say about it. He wanted to know what had absorbed his parents’ hearts and souls. He didn’t want to hear a speech– he wanted to see the thing for himself. To know if it was worth the time and energy they had put into it.
Eventually, Jack’s words tapered off expectantly. Danny waited with bated breath as he lifted the cables higher before slamming them together with more force than was necessary. 
For a moment, a green spark rippled through the center of the portal. It lit up the inner mechanisms, the light sharp and wavering. 
The light fizzled out as quickly as it came.
Jack’s arms fell to his sides, the cable slack in his grip. He and Maddie stared at the dark, empty portal. Listless.
“I don’t understand… it should have worked, Jack. Everything was perfect,” Maddie said, grabbing madly at her hair.
Jack just shook his head, utterly despondent. He dropped the cable to the ground and heaved a heavy sigh. 
Danny watched as all of the light drained from his parents’ eyes. They turned away from the machine and trudged back upstairs, hardly saying a word between them. 
Their parents never took failure well. They would wallow in the lows between unsuccessful projects, and Danny dreaded to see how long it would take them to recover from this particular defeat. 
Twenty years that amounted to a hole in the wall.
Danny stood before the dark portal, an empty feeling creeping into his chest. If any of his parents' insane machines could have worked, he prayed it would have been this one. He didn't know what they would do now. If they would return to the portal and try again, or let something else consume them.
Jazz slung an arm over Danny's shoulder, giving it a squeeze. 
"Maybe things will go back to normal now," Jazz said, without any certainty in her voice.
Danny mumbled an agreement as they followed their parents back upstairs.
His eyes lingered on the portal as they went.
Jack and Maddie didn't return to work on the portal. They wandered through the house, drifting aimlessly, not even looking at the basement door.
They might as well have been in mourning. A somber energy lingered in their every movement and word, as though a tombstone marked the laboratory. As though their work lay buried, dead and gone.
It didn’t surprise Jazz and Danny when their parents suddenly decided to go on a trip. They packed their bags the same day they announced it, before heading out the day after. A convention seemed like the perfect thing to lift their spirits, and truthfully Danny wasn't sorry to see them go. The atmosphere of the house brightened considerably without their sulking. 
The first day their parents were gone, Jazz went out with her friends. She paused at the door before she left, making sure that Danny wouldn’t miss her absence. He assured her that he was probably going to hang out with Sam and Tucker. Video games, the mall– they had little more than a week before school started and Danny planned to make the most of it. 
Jazz waved him goodbye, saying she’d be back in time to order pizza if he didn’t make plans with Sam and Tucker.
The moment the door shut, Danny called his friends. With his parents gone, it was a perfect weekend to have them over. They could have free range of the house, use the big living room television for video games, and they could do it all without any incessant racket from the lab.
Sam answered first, but Danny was quickly disappointed to learn that her parents had invited guests over and wanted Sam to stay and keep their daughter company. Tucker, too, was busy. His parents had decided to take him on an impulsive day trip out of the city as a last hurrah before the end of summer.
Just like that, Danny was alone with nothing to do. He sat on the couch, lost in his thoughts. A lazy day playing video games by himself wasn’t the worst thing in the world, but it dragged Danny’s mood down all the same. The house still felt cold and lifeless in the wake of the portal’s failure. His eyes flickered absently to the closed lab door.  He resented what lay beyond it. 
Without thinking much of it, Danny stood and opened the lab door. Everything downstairs looked the same as it had several days ago. The mess, the disorganization– the dark portal. Danny kept his eyes on the tunnel as he made his way down the stairs and over the mess on the floor.
He faced the portal head-on, craning his neck to look at the unlit light overhead. It looked finished– ready and waiting. Danny remembered the light that sparked within it, a single heartbeat that promised something more. 
For every failure his parents had, they had another success. Why did their most impressive work– the thing they poured more time and energy into than anything else– fail?
Glancing back around the lab, Danny’s eyes landed on the hazmat suits hung along the far wall. Most of them were teal and orange, though he recognized a white one tucked on the end. 
Danny grabbed it from the hook, rubbing his fingers over the material. His parents purchased the suit almost a year ago, when they entered the home stretch of their portal research. Danny remembered how happy his dad was, presenting Jazz and him with their own suits. He said that one day they would explore beyond the portal as a family, once they had conducted enough research to know what to expect. 
Danny wondered if a hazmat suit would even be enough to protect a person in a ghost dimension– the Ghost Zone, his parents called it. 
Though, looking at his baggy shirt, Danny supposed the hazmat would provide more coverage than that at least.
Glancing at the door, as though worried Jazz might come home and catch him in the act, Danny pulled the suit on. It fit a bit loosely, but he didn’t mind. Danny was used to wearing clothes that obscured his body shape.
Danny stared at the black gloves covering his hands, flexing his grip. The suit was comfortable, but Danny still couldn’t fathom how his parents wore them at all hours. 
There were a lot of things he didn’t understand about his parents.
Danny loved his mom and dad, but he didn’t get them. He didn’t understand how they poured themselves so fully into their ghost obsession. There wasn’t even any proof, as far as Danny could see, that they were right. In all the years his father ranted and raved about ghosts, Danny had never seen one. All they had to show was 'ectoplasm' and the strange properties that came with it.
He thought that maybe the portal would help him understand. That it would shed light on the enigmas that were Jack and Maddie Fenton. That it would, somehow, strip away years of feeling second fiddle to ideas and theories, of all things.
Yet the portal gave no answers. 
It drew Danny’s eye, the darkness deep and pressing. It consumed his thoughts, just as it had his parents’. Anger and frustration twisted in his belly like a knife. Danny grit his teeth and marched to stand before its maw.
Up close, Danny felt a draft through the tunnel. A quiet breath, borne from the dark. It sent a shiver down his spine, and for a moment Danny considered walking away.
Something kept him rooted to the spot, though Danny couldn’t say what. His eyes traced the metal lining of the portal, running over its circuits and bolts. It resembled many of his parents’ inventions, though magnified in scale. Danny wondered what could have gone wrong with the device, and if it was even fixable. For all he knew, the issue could be as impossible as a wayward theory, or as simple as a loose bolt. 
Danny found himself taking a step forward. He ran a hand along the machine’s wall, looking over the bolts, wondering if it could really be that simple. Maybe he could stumble upon the issue and be the one to fix it. 
Danny wasn’t surprised, however, when nothing stood out to him. Though his parents used strange scrap metal to complete most of their projects, they had gone above and beyond for the portal. It still had a certain style that spoke of their work, but the materials were clean, and each of the bolts flush. 
Sighing, Danny accepted that he might never know what went wrong with the portal. Unless his parents gutted the machine and returned to the project with fresh zeal, it might never see completion.
Hell, for all Danny knew, it was impossible anyway.
Danny stopped when the darkness grew too deep. He could see the dark shape of the archway around him, but none of the finer details. The draft seemed to grow, breathing down his neck.
He had seen enough.
Turning on his heel, Danny made to walk out of the tunnel. He barely managed a step before one of the thick wires snaking through the portal snagged his boot. 
Time seemed to slow as Danny pitched forwards, towards the wall of the tunnel. He stuck out his left hand to catch himself. 
Danny felt something give.
A gentle click sounded, echoing slightly in the tunnel. Danny sucked in a sharp breath– 
The world exploded around him.
A blinding flash of green stained Danny’s vision. A roaring, buzzing sound tore through the air. A shock ripped through his hand, along his arm, and found purchase in his very soul. It burned. Everything burned– his skin, his blood, his bones. He saw green, and black, and nothing all at once. An eternity passed, each second of it dragging through the agony that wracked his too-small frame. 
Someone was screaming, and it took Danny a lifetime to realize the sound came from his own scorched throat.
The burning, burning, burning dulled into an ache deeper than the ocean. The green stretched on just as far, an endless expanse of rolling, crashing waves that thrashed Danny upon unforgiving rocks. He knew nothing but that pain. He felt nothing but fear– the terrifying realization that he was slipping away, lost in that sea of green. 
Someone was still screaming. He couldn’t tell if it was him anymore.
Just as soon as the burning shock came, it faded away– with everything. The world itself seemed to sink beneath the green waves, and Danny felt something inside him drift along, embracing the current.
The last thing Danny remembered thinking– the only coherent thought he could muster through the chaos– was that he hoped Jazz would be okay without him. She had always protected him, guiding him away from the hazards within their own house. Bringing what small order she could to the chaos.
He squandered her efforts. 
Danny couldn't even protect himself.
A sound woke him. A word, called distantly. It echoed in his aching head, garbled and indistinct. 
He rolled onto his back, groaning as his muscles protested, achingly sore. He kept his eyes shut tight, feeling as though any visual stimulus might worsen the nausea twisting in his gut. 
Why was he in so much pain? Where was he? What happened?
The voice called again, closer and more urgent. It sounded like a name, though his sluggish mind refused to understand it.
He took slow, deep breaths to ground himself. Beyond the deep ache that settled within his bones, he felt… light. Too light, as though he might drift away from the ground. Panicking slightly, he gripped at the surface beneath him. It felt like stone, though something covered his fingers, muting his touch.
“Danny!” The name sounded again, this time clear. His name.
Danny rolled back onto his side, teeth gritted as every muscle in his body protested. He recognized the voice– Jazz. Jazz was calling for him.
She sounded frightened.
Planting his palms on the floor, Danny hoisted himself up onto his knees, panting with the effort. His head swam with dizziness. Tentatively, Danny opened his eyes. 
He found himself surrounded by darkness, though… he could still see. Danny slowly took in his surroundings, blinking away the bleariness that fogged his vision. The Fenton lab materialized around him, each disorganized, dark detail pronounced… and tinged green with a faint, wavering light.
Danny had never seen so well in low light before. He always had bad visual snow at night, the darkness swamped with rippling static. The static hadn’t left now, but the images through it seemed much more defined, as though he were almost seeing them in daylight. 
He didn’t know what to make of it. Nothing made sense. Danny couldn’t remember why he was down in the lab– on the ground. He hung his head, staring at his hands–
Hands covered with white gloves, stained with green smears…
They seemed to glow, and none of it was right.
The gloves had been black. Danny remembered, through the hazy fog of his mind, that the gloves had been black. 
He remembered wandering down into the lab. He remembered grabbing the hazmat suit from the hook. He remembered walking towards the portal and…
Danny couldn’t remember when he started hyperventilating. The memories flooded through him, a chaotic onslaught of twisted green, flashing lights, and pain beyond pain.
The green still remained, stained over the dark lab like a filter.
Danny whipped his head around, blood roaring in his ears.
The portal stared back at him, alive with a swirling green vortex. A gristly trail of the same bright color came from the portal, leading straight to where he lay.
The word ectoplasm came unbidden to his mind.
Danny dragged himself backwards, scrambling over the discarded materials on the lab floor, knocking away bits of metal and rubber and leaving more green smears across the stone. He kept his eyes firmly locked on the portal, as though the thing might swallow him whole if he turned his back on it.
(It already had.)
Distantly, Danny heard his name called again, followed by hurried footsteps.
“J-Jazz?” Danny called out, the words cracked and broken from his raw throat, echoing strangely in the quiet.
The lab door must have opened, judging by the way natural light spilled into the lab. He didn’t dare turn to look. He listened as the footsteps carried down the stairs, breaking the silence.
“Danny, what are you–” 
The footsteps stopped suddenly, faltering. Danny heard a shoe scuff, followed by the clank of metal. Against his better judgment, Danny tore his eyes from the portal.
Jazz stood, crouched at the foot of the steps. She held onto the railing tightly, with her legs splayed in a manner that suggested she stumbled and caught herself. She stared at him, her eyes stretched wide, reflecting the green glow of the portal.
“J… Jazz?” Danny asked, croaking out her name. The echo remained, tied solely to his own voice.
Jazz stiffened. She slowly pulled herself up with the railing, her body turned towards the steps, tensed as though ready to flee.
“Wh-who are you?” Jazz asked.
The words cut deeper than any knife. He slowly raised his hands, eyeing the stained white gloves that covered them. The gloves weren’t the only thing that had changed, he now noticed. The sleeves on his arms were black, as though the colors of the suit had traded places. Danny couldn’t fathom how. He didn’t understand, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to.
Rocking slightly, Danny’s eyes found Jazz’s. She hadn’t moved an inch.
“Jazz, it-it’s me,” Danny croaked out. “It’s m-me, I… Jazz, I-I’m scared.”
Danny watched as her eyes stretched still wider. Slowly, as though she were approaching a wild beast, Jazz let go of the railing. She kept one hand behind her, ready to grab it again, while her other reached out towards him.
“Danny is… is that you?” she said in hardly more than a whisper.
Her caution sent something fluttering inside his chest and Danny felt bile rise in his throat when it thrummed. He clutched at the black chest of the hazmat suit, desperately feeling for whatever sat between his ribs. 
He could feel a strange humming beneath his fingers that was never there before. It spiked with his nerves, growing into a dissonant tattoo. It felt like a heartbeat, only wrong, and…
Danny had no heartbeat pounding alongside it.
His breaths came quick and shallow, harsh against the ragged skin of his throat. Spots popped into Danny’s vision, and darkness crept along the edges.
“D-Danny?” Jazz said, her voice wavering nearly as much as the thrumming in his chest. She sounded much closer now, though no less nervous.
All Danny could do was nod, the gesture hardly perceptible as he rocked on his heels. Nothing felt real– everything was too much. Jazz was afraid of him, and Danny couldn’t tell why. 
Could she hear the thrumming buzz in his chest, or was there something else?
Jazz’s shoe scuffed on the stone floor. The sound was so close and sudden that Danny flinched back, a keening sound torn from his lips. He stared fixedly at the ground, not daring to look her in the eyes when she knelt before him.
She made a soft, shushing sound. “It– it’s okay. You’re okay,” she said quietly, her voice warbling like the broken notes of a scattered song.
Every bit of Danny shook. He couldn’t stop hyperventilating. His head felt as light as his body. The world spun and his stomach rolled.
Danny quickly turned his head, distancing himself from Jazz before letting loose the contents of his stomach. He gasped for breath, hands planted shakily, eyes firmly shut.
A hand tentatively fell between his shoulder blades and Danny tensed. Jazz’s touch was light and fluttery at first, before she began to rub her hand in slow, soothing circles.
Opening his eyes, Danny saw the bile painting the stone floor. It glowed a lurid green, as vibrant as the stains that led to the portal. It smelled faintly of citrus and ozone.
(Ectoplasm. Why was there ectoplasm inside him?)
Danny scrambled back to sit on his haunches, feeling Jazz’s hand pull away before it settled more firmly on his arm. He didn’t look at her. Danny couldn’t bring himself to look at her. 
Tears welled in his eyes. A choked sob bubbled up from his chest. Danny shrunk in on himself, feeling infinitely small. Scared in a way he had never been before.
“It’s o-okay,” Jazz said, though her voice had no more conviction than it had the day the portal was finished. “Just breathe, j-just… breathe with me, Danny. It-it’s going to be okay.”
She squeezed his arm, rubbing her thumb across the sleeve of his suit.
Danny listened as Jazz began to breathe in the counted, rhythmic pattern she taught him in middle school. Her breaths wavered as much as her voice, though she resolutely soldiered on. Without thinking much of it, Danny found himself following her lead.
The breathing technique once helped Danny through the panic attacks when he first started to transition and the bullying worsened with the change of his name.
Those days felt like mere inconveniences compared to this.
His head began to clear with the measured breaths, though exhaustion replaced the fog. He sank against Jazz, unsure when she’d moved so close. She had one arm wrapped securely across his shoulders, firm but with enough slack to let him retreat if he wanted to, but Danny had no such thoughts. He buried his face into the crook of her neck, squeezing his eyes shut. Sobs wracked his body as he wrapped his arms tightly around Jazz, fisting his hand into her long ginger hair.
Danny hoped the ectoplasm staining his hands wouldn’t hurt her. He desperately didn’t want to let go.
Shaking, Jazz followed suit. She pulled Danny close, one of her hands carding gently through his hair. He melted into the embrace, feeling wet drops splash on top of his head as Jazz cried.
“I–I don’t know what’s h-happening, but… it’s going to be o-okay. We’ll figure this out,” Jazz stammered.
Danny squeezed her tightly, as though he could simply hide himself in her arms and never have to face the world again. She felt warmer than usual. Had her hugs always been so warm?
Just when Danny felt secure, enveloped snugly in her embrace, a chill swept over him. The warmth disappeared, and Danny opened his eyes as he lurched forward and heard Jazz shriek.
Danny landed hard on the stone floor and twisted around, his eyes blown wide as Jazz scrambled away, passing through his torso. 
Through.
Danny quickly patted at his body, worried his own hand might slip through his stomach, but was relieved when his hand felt resistance.
The relief was short-lived, dashed by Jazz’s terrified expression and the way her hands shook as she crept towards him. 
“Danny, what is going on– what h-happened?” She sounded close to hysterical, and Danny wasn’t far behind her.
He just shook his head, words failing him as Jazz reached to touch his arm again. Danny tensed, worried she would slip through his body like vapor.
A weight lifted from his shoulders as he felt her arm gently land on his.
Sighing wearily, Danny met Jazz’s gaze. He could see so many questions brimming in her teary eyes, and Danny hardly knew how to answer a single one of them.
The portal sat behind Jazz now, haloing her in its verdant glow. The endless swirl of green sent a shiver down his spine. He could still feel the cold press of it around his body, fighting against the searing shock of electricity.
The word ectoplasm still danced in Danny’s mind, accompanied by far-off memories of his dad’s endless lectures. 
The portal, the gory trail across the floor, the stains on his gloves…
Ectoplasm. 
Ghosts.
Jazz followed Danny’s eyes to the portal, her lip quivering. The light from the portal gleamed off of her tear-streaked cheeks, and Danny noticed a smear of ectoplasm along her chin. 
“What happened, Danny?” she asked once more, her voice so soft it was hardly more than a breath.
“I…” The words wouldn’t come easily to Danny’s lips. Jazz slipped her hands into his gloved ones, squeezing them tight. Danny focused on the green stains between them, squeezing back.
“I was… inside the portal,” Danny managed to say. Each word cracked and broken.
A sharp intake of breath. Jazz squeezed his hands so tightly that it hurt. His left hand throbbed with pain– before her grip suddenly loosened.
Danny watched in horror as his left hand slipped seamlessly through hers. He whimpered, too afraid to consider what that meant.
Jazz didn’t say anything. She simply held on firmly to the hand that remained in her grip. “In–inside?” she pressed, her voice rising an octave in fear.
Staring at his left hand, Danny hesitantly held it out to her. Just as hesitantly, Jazz reached to accept it. Once more, his hand chose to obey the laws of physics and slipped into hers.
Danny nodded, his head pounding with the movement. 
“Inside,” he echoed– in more ways than one.
Jazz took in a deep breath and let it out shakily. She shook her head, seeming lost. Defeated.
“Danny, you look so different…” she said suddenly, meeting his gaze with a pinched expression.
A fresh wave of panic tore through Danny’s chest, accompanied by that strange thrumming.
“Di-different how?” he demanded, shuffling uncomfortably. 
Something between pity and fear found its way into Jazz’s eyes. She lifted her right hand and stroked his hair, pulling a lock of the sweaty strands forward.
When she said nothing, Danny didn’t understand. He furrowed his brows, waiting for her to say more, when he finally paid attention to the hair in front of his eyes.
He wasn’t sure how he didn’t notice it before. Sweat and ectoplasm had slicked some of his hair back, plastering the locks to his forehead, but surely he should have seen the white strands of hair hovering over his eyes.
Danny ripped his other hand from Jazz’s and pulled at his own hair, dragging more of it into his line of sight. It was snow-white– whiter than the gloves, and glowing more brightly.
“No…” Danny said, the echo in his voice taunting him. “N-no, no… no.”
Hands fisting through his hair, he tugged at the snowy strands and doubled over. It had to be a dream. All of this had to be some cruel, sick nightmare…
“Danny,” Jazz said, her voice steadier, but no less shaken than it had been since she stepped foot in the lab. 
Danny didn’t look at her, though he listened as she kept speaking.
“Danny, what happened when you… when you touched the portal?” she asked. 
She skirted around the detail of him stepping foot inside the machine, as though burying the truth would make any of it easier.
The portal loomed behind her, seeming infinitely taller from where they sat on the stone floor. A doorway of death, opened only by taking what it gave.
Danny knew what had happened. He knew it the moment he felt no heartbeat in his chest. He knew it the moment he saw the glow of the portal.
He knew it the moment the button clicked beneath his hand.
“I was electrocuted,” Danny whispered, not meeting Jazz’s eyes. 
She was quiet. Everything felt too quiet. The thrumming in his chest filled the silence, much more a feeling than a sound, though it reverberated enough to quietly buzz. Danny wasn’t sure if Jazz could hear it. Everything was much sharper now, from the shapes in the dark lab to the sound of Jazz’s nervous breathing.
Before Jazz could say anything, Danny let an idea take root in his mind. It fought with everything he knew– everything he was taught. A wicked, dangerous idea that undermined the Fenton name.
“Jazz, am I… am I a ghost?” he asked.
The glow of his suit and hair. The echo to his voice, and the ectoplasm that came from his belly. The light feel of his body, and the way he phased through hers.
All brought on by the shock of the portal, and the wash of its green glow.
Danny didn’t know what else he could be, considering it all.
(The shock still echoed in his aching body. His left arm twitched, the muscles spasming painfully at the mere thought.)
Jazz shook her head forcefully, though she struggled to deny it. She opened her mouth, making broken, disjointed sounds that barely constituted words, before she clamped her jaw tight.
She simply shook her head again, hanging it low as she grabbed Danny once more by the shoulders and yanked him into a ferocious hug.
Jazz always gave strong hugs, but Danny wasn’t sure if she’d ever held him so tightly. He returned her embrace, hoping beyond hope that he would stay tangible this time.
“You can’t be a ghost,” Jazz said quietly, disbelievingly.
Danny swallowed a lump in his throat, wishing he had some water to cool the sting. The word ghost kept rattling around in his mind until it settled there. It sounded right, though it shouldn’t.
Throwing every bit of trust he had into his words, Danny said, “But what if I am? Jazz, I… I don’t have a h-heartbeat.”
If this was being a ghost, he certainly didn’t feel like the malevolent, uncaring echoes their parents spoke of. Danny could remember everything, and he felt just as strongly as he had before stepping foot into the portal. He loved Jazz. He trusted her with his life…
And now his death, he supposed.
Jazz’s vice-like hug tightened and Danny swore he felt his back crack under the strain.
Jazz’s arms shook as she said, “Whatever you are, you’re my brother.”
Those words warmed Danny to the core. He buried his face back into her shoulder, not caring that he left tears, snot, and ectoplasm on her shirt. Just knowing that Jazz was here for him, no matter what, made it all bearable.
The warmth pooled in Danny’s chest, soft and soothing. He focused on the feeling, gasping as it spread across his body.
A sudden bright light burst from Danny’s torso and Jazz stumbled back– but did not let go of him. They both watched with mounting dread as the light morphed into a ring and split.
The glaring white rings swept over him, trailing up and down his body. Danny winced as the light went up his neck and over his head.
Jazz squinted, blinking dazedly. Her eyes widened, fresh tears welling in them.
“Danny!” she cried, tackling him in another hug.
For a moment, Danny didn’t understand. He awkwardly returned her hug, unsure what the light had done. It wasn’t until Danny felt the heavier weight to his body that he began to understand.
Jazz wouldn’t let go, but Danny could see black hair hanging in front of his eyes. He raised his right hand behind her back, delighted to see that the white gloves and black sleeves of the hazmat suit had gone, somehow leaving him in the blue shirt he’d worn before entering the portal.
Somehow, he was himself again.
Where the hazmat suit had gone, he couldn’t say.
“Thank goodness,” Jazz said under her breath, so quietly that Danny was sure he wasn’t supposed to hear.
When Jazz finally let go, she fixed him with a bright smile. She looked him up and down, as if making sure everything was the same– and then her eyes snapped suddenly to his left arm.
Danny quickly did the same, holding it up to get a better look. It didn’t take long for Danny to notice what she saw. A large pink starburst of a scar covered his palm, branching out into feathery, bolt-like patterns. It circled up the entirety of his left arm, disappearing under the sleeve of his shirt.
Jazz had no words.
Neither did Danny.
Silence stretched between them as both traced the marks across Danny’s arm. It served as undeniable proof that the worst had happened. That what happened to Danny could not simply fade away with the dying light of those strange blue-white rings.
“Are you okay?” Jazz asked nervously.
Danny could only nod, feeling lost. 
“Am I still…” he began to ask, unsure. 
What Danny could see of himself, other than the scar, seemed normal enough, but he needed Jazz’s reassurance.
Jazz didn’t respond right away, as though his words drifted slowly to her ears. She reluctantly pulled her eyes away from the scars marring his arm, looking him in the eye.
“Well, your, um, hair and eyes are back to normal, but I–”
Alarm bells rang in Danny’s head and he raised his hands to his face, pulling at the corners of his eyes.
“What was wrong with my eyes?” he demanded.
Jazz fidgeted uncomfortably under his glare, picking at her nails. She bit her lip, glancing away before she said, “They… Danny, they were green and glowing.”
Danny blinked, surprised. Shaken. He patted at his cheek, staring down at the ectoplasm stains on the floor.
“You didn’t… say…” he said, dumbstruck, his voice cracking horribly on the words.
Jazz huffed, her lip quivering as she said, “You seemed a little overwhelmed for that.”
Danny couldn’t help but laugh. A cold, broken little chuckle that probably didn’t meet his eyes. 
“I suppose…” he said quietly.
Danny stared back at the portal, wondering if his eyes had been the same shade of green. The thought soured his stomach, and he felt–
That same thrumming at his center.
Placing a hand across his chest, Danny felt for the strange humming that lay there. Somehow, it remained with the scar…
Though this time it sat alongside a slow, steady beat.
“I have a heartbeat,” Danny said. “I–I have a heartbeat still,” he repeated, as if to assure himself. 
Jazz froze, eyes stretching wide. She snatched up Danny’s right hand and pressed her fingers to the interior of his wrist. Her brow furrowed as she felt for his pulse, and he watched her relax when she found it.
“It’s slow, but… there,” she confirmed. 
“I’ll take slow over gone,” Danny said a little too quickly.
Jazz choked out a small huff of a laugh. Her eyes were watery and their hands, once more clutched together, both shook. 
“You’re warmer,” she said with a note of reluctance. “You… you were cold.”
Danny just nodded his head, letting the sobering fact roll over him. He thought of how warm Jazz had felt– how warm she still felt. 
An icy chill settled over him, considering the implications of ectoplasm-green eyes and a chill to his skin.
No sooner did the thought strike him, Danny felt that sensation of cold wash over him in the same manner the warmth had. The bright light returned, and this time Danny leapt to his feet.
His legs shook violently beneath him as he backpedaled, staring at the damning beam of light. Danny tried to will it away, but it pressed on, unrelenting.
Wherever the light passed, it left the hazmat suit behind.
“No…” Danny said, immediately noticing that the echo had returned to his voice. “No, why is this happening? This can’t be happening.”
Danny paced on the spot, hugging his arms around himself, stumbling over the trash on the floor as his knees wobbled.
Jazz slowly stood, watching him with frightened eyes and a tense set to her shoulders. She held her hands clasped in front of her, wringing them.
“We–we’ll figure this out,’ Jazz said quietly. “We could go to the hospital, they might be able to help.”
Danny rounded on her, exasperated– overwhelmed.
“Jazz, what is there to fix? I can’t just go to a hospital like this, I– I died. The portal ki–”
“Don’t say that,” Jazz said quickly, her hands flying to her sides, her fists clenched and trembling. “You– you still have a heartbeat. Ghosts can’t… Danny, you can’t be… dead.”
Shaking his head, Danny continued to pace, wandering the lab in discordant circles. His wobbly legs barely kept him standing. His boots kicked at the junk on the floor, the metal clattering loudly across the stone.
One particularly large piece of metal caught Danny’s foot and, with a sinking jolt, he was back inside the portal, falling, falling, falling. 
Fear raced through him, white-hot and icy-cold at the same time. It gripped at his chest, and Danny threw his hands forward, wondering how much the shock would hurt this time around.
His hands crashed onto one of his parents’ work tables, sending implements scattering in a noisy, rattling crescendo.
“Danny!” Jazz called, racing to his side. 
She warbled something in his ear, fretting over him in a doting, loving way perfected through years of being an older sister to a clumsy brother. Danny didn’t hear what she said. His eyes stared, fixedly, at a mirror on the table.
The person staring back at him was hardly recognizable. Snowy hair framed the face, and acid green eyes burned beneath the glowing strands. The eyes flickered back and forth as Danny took in the face, its skin oddly tanned with a green undertone in the cheeks. The pupils were as white as the hair, two spheres of light that constricted to tiny pinholes amidst the glowing green irises.
It was him, Danny knew. Whatever he was, whatever he had become–
It was him.
Danny realized Jazz was gripping his right hand, patiently standing beside him. A soft, warm presence in the cold, quiet lab. He felt lucky to have her here. Relieved to not be alone.
Only… he worried what would happen when anyone else saw. Danny was no stranger to being uncomfortable in his own skin, but this... 
He felt like a monster.
“How am I going to face M–Mom and Dad?” Danny asked, not looking away from the mirror.
Jazz stiffened beside him. Her grip on his hand tightened and she rubbed her thumb over his gloves comfortingly. Absently, Danny noticed that the stains had somehow disappeared from those gloves. 
The stains remained on Jazz’s hands.
“They love you, Danny,” she said. “They love you and this shouldn’t… this shouldn’t change that.”
Danny grit his teeth, watching as the eyes in the mirror flared more brightly. He shut them tight, not wanting to look at them any longer.
“They hate ghosts, Jazz. You’ve– you’ve heard how they talk about them.”
He didn’t need to elaborate– Jazz knew. How many times had they heard their mother tell them that ghosts were evil, manipulative monsters? How many times had their father passionately told them he would love to get his hands on a ghost– to tear it apart, molecule by molecule, and find just what made it tick.
That thrumming in Danny’s chest grew, alongside a squeezing ache. Frankly, Danny wasn’t sure he could say any of it aloud. His cracked voice had begun to waver again, fresh tears welling in his eyes.
Danny felt Jazz pull him away from the mirror. He went along without a fuss, trailing after her like a lost little dog. 
“Let’s get out of the lab, okay?” she said. 
Jazz led Danny up the stairs, letting him lean on her shoulder. The exhaustion that clung to him felt deeper than bone. Each step drained his energy, and he wanted nothing more than to sink down, curl up, and fall asleep.
When they reached the top of the stairs, Jazz left him at the door and quickly ran to close the living room blinds. Danny stood awkwardly in the doorway of the lab, feeling like a stranger in his own home.
Noticing his hesitation, Jazz told him to go sit on the couch while she flitted through the kitchen, opening one of the cabinets.
Danny obeyed, shuffling into the living room and over to the sofa. He went to sink down onto the plush cushions– but shouted as he slipped through the couch. A cold, shivery feeling encompassed Danny as he stared at the padding inside the cushions.
A crashing sound came from the kitchen, followed by Jazz’s hurried footsteps. Danny felt her grab one of his hands. She tugged, hoisting him to his feet with more force than was necessary. Shakily, Danny stepped away from the couch, breathing heavily.
“I d–don’t know how to stop that,” Danny warbled.
Jazz frowned, clearly shaken but trying her best to tamp down her own feelings. “Come on, let’s get you some water,” she said gently.
Jazz took Danny's hand again. After all the times she’d grabbed it tonight, it felt like an extension of his person.
They both went into the kitchen, stepping around the shattered pieces of glass cup Jazz had dropped. Danny noticed for the first time that his boots were as white as the gloves.
At Jazz’s gentle nudge, Danny pulled out one of the dining room chairs. He pressed the seat with his palm first, making sure he would stay solid, before daring to sit down.
They didn’t speak as Jazz pulled another glass from the cabinet and filled it with cold water. The clock on the wall ticked loudly in the silence, grating against Danny’s already-frayed nerves.
He took the glass of water from Jazz gratefully. His throat still burned, an echo of the screams that rang in his ears.
Danny hardly took a sip of the water, however, before the glass slipped from his hands and fell to the ground with a resounding crash. He knew that his grip hadn’t been loose. The cup simply phased through his hands, slipping with no more difficulty than he had fallen through the couch.
Jazz looked him over, making sure he wasn’t hurt by the glass. She seemed to realize what had happened, and mercifully did not draw attention to it. Danny was glad for that, feeling entirely too close to breaking down again. Tears blurred his vision and Danny quickly wiped them away.
Jazz silently brought him another glass of water, this time leaving it on the table with a straw. Danny shot her a grateful look before drinking deeply. The cold water felt heavenly against his raw throat, and he couldn't help but sigh in relief.
Jazz filled the glass a second time for him before she began to sweep up the broken glass. Danny listened to the rhythmic sweep of the broom and the  sharp tinkle of glass sliding into the dustpan. Jazz took her time, cleaning up parts of the floor where Danny was sure no glass had fallen. It was something to do, he supposed.
She filled the glass a third time before she tied off the trash bag and took it to the garage. 
The clock continued its relentless ticking in her absence. Time stretched on, and after a while Danny heard the telltale sounds of Jazz crying. He gripped the glass in both hands, holding it like a small child, his throat tight with emotion.
When Jazz came back, her eyes puffy and bright, her nose red, Danny looked at her with matching watery eyes. He grinned ruefully and she matched that as well.
The sun was sinking low in the sky, the light from the windows fading with its departure. Danny hadn't realized that the power was out, though it made sense of the dark lab. The battery clock was the only thing alive in the too-quiet house.
(Other than the portal, though Danny remembered that his parents had a large backup generator hooked up to it. He hoped the thing wasn't somehow alive without it.)
Jazz busied herself around the kitchen, pulling supplies out of the cabinets. She grabbed several candles and lanterns, dispersing them around the kitchen and living room. Danny wanted to help her, but he couldn’t bring himself to get up. He stared at his empty glass, fixated on how the material reflected the green of his eyes.
Before long, the sun had set and the house was dark, lit only by the flicker of candles, the glow of lanterns– and the soft glow Danny himself emitted. 
A hand gently landed on his shoulder and Danny startled slightly. Jazz was patient and quiet as she led him to the couch, this time making sure he safely sat down before letting go.
The couch was covered in blankets, pillows, drinks, and snacks. Danny wasn’t sure when she found the time to collect it all. 
Probably in the time he sat staring into his glass, numb to the world around him.
They didn’t speak much as they both got situated on the couch. Danny hunkered under one of his favorite blankets– a starry blue one that Jazz gave him on his birthday several years ago.
Jazz nestled some pillows around them, making a sort of nest. Between the blankets, snacks, and being on the couch, it felt like one of their old movie nights– minus the television.
(Minus one black-haired, blue-eyed boy.)
Jazz tried to get Danny to eat, but his stomach pitched with nausea at the thought. She sighed, her brows knitting together with concern.
There was a haunted look in her teal eyes. Jazz looked so much older than she had earlier that morning when she shut the front door, running off to see her friends.
Danny hated that he made her worry. He hated that he had stepped foot inside the portal. It was such a stupid, foolish decision, and Danny wasn’t sure how he was supposed to live with the consequences of it.
(If he was even still living.)
“I’m sorry,” Danny choked out, lost in his own head. He clutched the blanket more tightly, leaning against Jazz. “I sh-shouldn’t have gone into the portal– I– I just wanted to see, and… I’m sorry.”
Jazz took in a sharp breath. She rounded on him, her lip quivering as she grabbed either side of his face.
“Danny. I don’t know why you…” She sighed, taking a deep breath as she paused. “We all make mistakes. I just… I’m so sorry I wasn’t there to stop this one.”
Tears streamed from her eyes, and Danny hated to know he’d put them there. Her apology rang bitter in his ears, and he vehemently shook his head, shaking off her hands.
“Don’t say sorry,” he said, his jaw tensed. “Please, don’t. It’s not your fault that I–I was being stupid… It was so stupid.”
Jazz settled back down beside him, inching closer so their shoulders pressed together. “You’re not stupid,” she said.
Danny let out a disbelieving huff before he rested his head against her shoulder. He noticed that Jazz shivered slightly at the contact, however, and quickly tried to pull away. His efforts were in vain when Jazz leaned in closer, closing the gap.
“I feel stupid,” Danny grumbled, leaning back against her shoulder. “I just… walked in… and tripped.”
Jazz shuddered. Her hand groped for his left, clutching it tight. His palm beneath the glove ached, and Danny wondered what the scar would look like beneath it in this form.
He didn’t dare look.
“That portal should have never been in the basement,” Jazz said. “If it wasn’t you, it would’ve…”
Her words trailed off and Danny made no effort to finish them. Entertaining the thought was unspeakable.
(The idea that he might have preferred it that way.)
“What is with those light rings?” Jazz suddenly asked, as if she needed something to focus her mind on. 
The change in subject was welcome, though Danny wasn’t sure he knew how to answer her question.
Danny hummed to himself, the sound pairing well with the thrum in his chest. It had happened twice now, that strange burst of light, and Danny understood it no more than… anything that had happened.
All he recalled was the feeling. 
The first time Danny felt the rings, they had been warm like a wash of summer rain, rushing through his being.
The second time Danny felt the rings, they had been cold, more like a winter storm circling him in snow.
Without answering Jazz, Danny tried to imagine that first feeling again. He couldn’t be sure if simply imagining it would do something, but…
That spot of his chest that hummed and thrummed suddenly felt warm. He leaned into the feeling, imagining it spreading– washing over him.
The light burst forth once more, and this time Danny did not cower when he saw it. He watched, fascinated, as it made the now-familiar journey up and down his body. Danny welcomed the familiar sight of his blue shirt– and even the scar on his arm. He felt for his heartbeat, sighing with relief when it gently beat against his fingers.
“How does that work? Can you control it? How do you feel?” Jazz stared with wide eyes as she hurtled the questions at him.
Danny couldn’t help but laugh. It felt good to laugh.
“I… think I can control it?” He said cautiously. “It felt warm the first time it happened, so I just tried to think of that.”
Jazz nodded slowly, though she asked once more, “How do you feel?” Concern dripped in her voice, and it gripped at Danny’s heart. 
(His mercifully beating heart. Could a ghost truly have a heartbeat?)
The question was a loaded one. How did he feel? How was he supposed to feel, after…
The portal. The shock. His death.
“O–okay,” he said anyway. “I feel okay…”
The last thing Danny wanted right now was to explore his own head and decipher those feelings.
Jazz clearly wasn’t fooled. A world-weary sigh left her lips and she leaned back against him, resting her chin on top of his head. She was so much taller than him and, while it annoyed Danny most days, he was glad for it now. 
“I don’t know what we’re going to do, Danny,” she said it more to herself.
The words shook something deep in Danny’s core. The thrumming pulsated alongside his heartbeat, and it was only then that he noticed how much it followed with his emotions.
 “I don’t want to tell them,” Danny said suddenly, with some measure of conviction. 
He didn’t need to specify who.
When Jazz didn’t immediately shut down the idea, Danny kept going.
“I–I don’t know what they’ll do, and I don’t want to… I don’t want to find out. If I can just look normal then they’ll n-never have to know, and I… won’t have to… find out....”
Jazz wrapped an arm around him, her hands still shaking slightly. Something about the gesture made Danny’s rambling trail off. He looked up at her, finding that she was nervously worrying her lip.
“Okay,” was all she said.
The response made Danny pause. He had expected her to disagree, or to try and come up with another plan, or to otherwise convince him that he needed to tell their mom and dad.
The last thing he expected was for her to agree.
“Really?” Danny asked, skeptical.
Jazz continued to worry her lip, so much so that Danny feared she might bite through her skin. Silence stretched between them as she seemed to collect her thoughts. Her eyes darted nervously around the room before coming to rest on him.
“I don’t know if it’s the best plan, b–but… They have so many weapons in this house,” her voice quivered, and Danny could see Jazz’s eyes trailing over several of the spots he knew held those weapons. “With the portal active now, they’re going to be more vigilant than ever and I… I honestly don’t know what they’ll think, Danny. I don’t know what they’ll do.”
The arm around him squeezed tightly and Danny leaned into her, closing his eyes. 
“I love them. I know they love you,” she continued, as though she needed to convince herself more of the idea. “They just… don’t understand some things. They don’t think sometimes.”
It had taken their parents almost a year to even consistently use the right pronouns for Danny.
They still messed up sometimes.
Still, compared to this, coming out as trans to them had been little more than a hurdle.
(Though it had seemed like the tallest mountain peak at the time.)
They didn’t even resent him for it. They accepted trans people– him.
Danny couldn’t say they felt the same about ghosts. 
“So this stays between us?” Danny asked, hating the hopeful note in his own voice. 
There was another long pause, marked only by Jazz’s heart beating beneath his ear. The candlelight illuminating the living room flickered, shadows dancing across the walls. The entire room smelled like sickeningly sweet butterscotch. 
“At least until we figure out what’s going on,” Jazz said. “What… all of this is.”
Danny felt he already knew, at least in some measure. It seemed obvious to him. 
Perhaps it even was to Jazz, regardless of if she admitted it or not.
“Okay,” Danny agreed, accepting that it would have to do for now. 
Some of the tension left Jazz’s shoulders. She hummed to herself, the sound vibrating against Danny’s head. His eyelids drooped low, exhaustion creeping through his sore body, weighing him down.
One last thought lingered in Danny’s sleep-addled mind as Jazz’s humming morphed into a lullaby he recognized from years gone by.
“I want to tell Sam and Tucker, though,” he mumbled against her shoulder.
The humming faltered and stopped. Jazz took a deep breath before she said, “Okay.”
A small smile graced Danny’s lips as Jazz resumed the lullaby. 
Danny didn’t know what to expect from tomorrow. Their parents would be home in three days, and it wouldn’t matter if he kept this secret if he accidentally phased through something in front of them.
There was so much to figure out. So much to talk about with Jazz– with Sam and Tucker. Within a few short hours, his life had taken such a turn that Danny no longer knew what to expect around the corner.
(His life had ended after all, hadn’t it? Yet he was still here, his heart still beating.)
Danny pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind for later, focusing instead on Jazz’s lullaby. He let the sound carry his exhausted mind to sleep. 
~*~
Jazz kept humming, even when she was sure Danny had fallen asleep. It was something to do. Something to keep her busy– to keep her mind from spiraling.
She held her little brother close, uncomfortably aware that Danny wasn’t warm. The cold chill disappeared with his transformation, but he still wasn’t warm.
It seemed normal for him now. Yet another strange thing to adjust to.
A soft, rhythmic rumble distracted Jazz. She stopped humming suddenly, focusing on the sensation. A familiar sound accompanied it, though it wasn’t something she’d ever expected to hear from her brother.
Throughout the evening, while holding Danny close, she had felt… something inside his chest. A strange humming that had nothing to do with his voice. She tried to ignore it, like so many other smaller details, but it persisted all the same.
She supposed this sound was connected to that humming. It came from Danny’s chest, rumbling like distant thunder.
Somehow, inexplicably, he was purring.
Jazz didn’t wake him. The sound was strange, but it was no more strange than anything else she’d seen that evening. She didn’t know a lot about animals, but Jazz did know that cats purr when they’re happy or content. If this was at all the same, then she supposed Danny simply felt safe– maybe even a little bit happy.
(If anyone could be happy in this situation.)
Maybe Jazz would discover later that she was mistaken with this conclusion, but she chose to cling to it now. 
Jazz clung to her brother just as tightly, reluctant now to ever let go. Ectoplasm stained her shirt and hair, but she couldn’t bring herself to leave for a shower.
Sleep did not come easily to Jazz. When she first saw Danny in the basement, changed and stained by ectoplasm, she feared she had lost him.
Even now Jazz feared she might still lose him. 
Whatever Danny was, however, he was still… Danny. Her brother.
Jazz would be there for him, no matter what. Human, ghost, or something in-between. 
196 notes · View notes
itskatastrophe-x · 3 years ago
Text
Finally Home (c!Sapnap x Reader)
I let my twitter followers decide who I wrote a oneshot for, and they wanted c!Sapnap, so here it is :) Written in the span of like... Idk 2 hours?? It’s a soulmate AU where you can feel everything your soulmate feels when you get in a certain distance of them and it gets stronger the closer you get to them. I hope yall like it!!
Word count :  2,701
^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^
There it was again. That burning sensation on the palms of your hands. You didn’t understand where it came from or why it was happening, but it hurt like hell. You wondered if it would ever stop, but you doubted it would. You knew the stories all too well but figured it would never happen to you, and slowly your fears confirmed it as all of your friends got theirs and eventually found their person. A soulmate. The way they talked about how they could feel what their soulmate felt on a physical level. They would feel light brushes against their arms or bumps when the other person would be somewhere busy. All of your friends had found their other halves years ago, explaining that when it happened there was a jolt like electricity in their bodies. After all of your friends had abandoned you, you had given up hope in ever finding your person. So you travelled. For miles and miles and miles, seeing every country, village, and kingdom your empty heart desired. You had lost everyone you loved and couldn’t even find your soulmate. 
Then it happened all too suddenly. If you had to guess, it happened when you got within range of the person, so you kept up your pace and travelled. It was an unpleasant sensation. It felt like fire all over your body. At first it was a small stinging, then the farther you travelled, the closer you got to this person, it grew. You would wake up in the middle of the night screaming because of cuts and wounds your other half would experience. You wished it was something as simple as the things your friends had gone through, but this was a nightmare. You wished you could meet this person once and for all just so you could give them a strong right hook to the jaw, then changed your mind as you remembered that you would also feel it. 
You knew by the things you were going through that this person was crazy and potentially dangerous with the amount of wounds this person was accumulating through the weeks of you travelling, so you did your best to be delicate. Whenever you would feel a new pain, you would prepare healing potions and drink them in hopes that the other person would also feel the effects. Either that or, if it didn’t feel like a gash or deep cut, you would trace your fingers over the spot gently to sooth the other person to let them know you would comfort them. What you couldn’t stand, though, was the feeling of fire dancing around your fingers. You eventually learned to tune it out and numb yourself to it, so it wasn’t nearly as bad as it was when it started, but it was still painful and annoying.
Then it stopped as suddenly as it started. For three whole days. Three. Days. After the first couple hours of the first day you started to worry. It was rare that you got a single second of rest from this crazy asshole, but three days? Part of you hoped he wasn’t dead, but the other part was happy you didn’t have to deal with scratches, bruises, and burning. But you missed it so much that you wished the burning in your palms returned. Nothing stopped you from continuing on though, even though you had no idea if you were going the right way anymore or not. You used the pain as a guide for weeks to lead you closer, but when it stopped, you lost your physical compass. Something in your heart told you that you were still heading towards them though, so you kept on, this time faster and without much sleep. You wanted to make sure this person was ok, and fast. You watched all of your friends leave you, you couldn’t have your literal soulmate leave you as well. 
When the third day ended and you were about to fall asleep, you felt it. The smallest little touch to your cheek you had ever felt. It was out of the blue and you had never felt such a touch come from the other person, so it woke you up instantly. You laid there for a moment, the stroking on your cheek so soft and faint that you wondered if it was even the person at all. Slowly, you lifted your hand to your other cheek and caressed it. The feeling on your other cheek stopped, but the feeling of a hand still stayed there. That’s when you knew it was them. They knew you would feel it, but probably weren’t expecting you to return the feeling to them. The stroking started again, so you stroked your other cheek for them as well. Then it hit you. Why had you never thought of it before? After weeks of knowing you had a soulmate out there, it just now hit you. You sat up from your bed in the little hotel you were staying at and tapped your leg. The feeling on your cheek stopped then you felt the same tap on your leg again. You smiled and pressed your hand down for a second and felt more pressure a couple seconds later. 
Then you started. At first it was a smiley face, then letters one at a time to write to the person. You asked their age first. Then you felt the pressure of the person writing back. “20”. You drew yours back, then they drew a smile to confirm they got it. You asked their name. “Nick” they wrote back. Then you wrote yours. You got as much information as you could from this small communication as possible so you could find him easier. After your small exchange, you got up, got dressed, packed your things and headed towards a location called “Dream SMP”. You had seen it on maps before, but it was so far away that you thought you would never get there. You had already crossed oceans, rivers, and mountains for this man, but now you had a new fire to feel. A fire burning so deep in you that it ignited in your eyes. You used all the money and resources you had to get there. You bought boats and horses for the days leading up to your arrival.
After over a month of travelling, you finally made it to the outside borders of what was known as the DreamSMP. The streets were full and bustling with life. Most people smiled and greeted you as a new member, fully accepting you the second you set foot on the land, others scowled or threw hateful words your way, possibly thinking you wouldn’t hear, or maybe they hoped you would so you would leave. You asked around about this person “Nick” and got an overwhelming response of happy chatter and protests of anger, so you left as politely as you could to search on your own. 
You felt like it would take forever to find this other person if all of the streets and businesses would be this crowded and overwhelming, until you came across one man standing at the edge of a river with his eyes closed and a smile on his face. His fluffy brown hair flipped up in the front and slightly waved in the breeze, the colors he wore matching his vibe completely. You approached him cautiously at first, but felt comforted by the aura he gave off. You cleared your throat quietly, so as not to startle him, and he opened his eyes slowly to greet you, the lightest shade of blue you had ever seen. He gave you a soft smile and waved you over, so you complied. 
For a second, you wondered if this was him, but you took note of his soft, clear looking skin and the lack of electricity as you neared him. When you got next to him, he pointed across the river to a very ornate village sitting on the hills surrounded by flower forests. “Have you ever seen anything so beautiful?” You stared in awe at the mushroom buildings and statue and smiled at him. “I’ve travelled a long way to get here and passed hundreds of kingdoms, but this tops them all,” you replied. He made a noise of agreement and smiled, content with your answer. “Well, tell me, new face, how did you make your way to Kinoko Kingdom, and why are you here?” There was no malice in his voice as he asked and you could tell he was being friendly so you knew you wasn’t being standoffish. “I came to meet my soulmate,” you answered. His eyes went wide and met yours, a look of shock on his face. “Th-that’s you?!” You looked at him, furrowing your brows. How did he know? As if to read your mind, he continued. “I knew he was expecting someone, but, wow… I mean… He’s gonna want to meet you now. He literally hasn’t shut up for weeks about you.” You stammered for a second as he grabbed your hand and started running, barely giving you any reaction time to keep up with him. He was fast and energetic and you liked it. He seemed friendly and bubbly and his touch was comforting. 
He weaved in and out of streets and occasional bystanders watching the two of you with wide eyes and gaping mouths. You took it these people didn’t see many new faces, seeing as they were small in numbers. He didn’t slow down until both of you were panting in front of a giant cherry blossom tree in front of the biggest library you had seen. You could hear a loud voice echoing out of the open hole, acting as a doorway. The man next to you put a hand on your shoulder and you looked over at his grinning face. “I should explain before you get in there… My name is Karl and Sapnap, or Nick, is my fiancé. Now before you get worried, we’re in an open, poly relationship and he’s talked to me about all of this and I am 100% welcoming you into our little family.” He gave you a warm smile that reached his eyes so you knew he was being sincere. 
A booming shout broke your thoughts and you felt a pain in your toe that almost made you fall over, then loud laughter erupted. You smiled and shook off your foot as Karl motioned you inside, and that’s all you needed to run inside. The space inside was open with books lining the high walls. There was a staircase to your right, a mushroom in the far back, and a balcony above your head. There you saw him. At first he stood there laughing with the other man in front of him, not realizing you were inside, so you stared. You felt something like fire dancing across your skin lightly as you watched him with wide eyes. He was more beautiful than anyone you had ever seen. He had his jet black hair tied into a messy, low bun at the back of his head, a scar across the length of his face that went across the bridge of his nose. He had a light dusting of freckles across his rosy cheeks and the most piercing eyes. The man in front of him caught onto your stare and nudged the man, pointing down at you from their spot on the balcony. When his eyes met yours, a shiver went up your spine and your skin felt hot, like you were now encased in a cocoon of fire. For a moment you both just stared at each other, not being able to move, until you felt a pair of hands push you gently from behind.
That’s all it took to move you. You took off towards the stairs and took them two at a time as he ran to meet you on the landing. You collided into the biggest hug that knocked the wind out of your lungs and almost sent you flying backwards, but he kept you steady. Your eyes welled up for a moment and you laughed into his chest. He smelled like a campfire, fir trees, and old books. He was so warm and your body fit his so perfectly under his arms. You heard footsteps coming up the stairs and a soft touch to your shoulder, a small hum coming from Karl behind you. “Thank god you’re finally here. Sapnap literally would not shut up. He always talked about how soft you were with him when he knew how hard it must have been for you. Weeks. Weeks.” Sapnap reached an arm out to punch Karl, but he dodged easily since Sapnap still hadn’t let you go. You chuckled and closed his eyes as he put his arm back over your shoulder and squeezed you closer to him. 
“I can’t believe you’re real,” he whispered into your hair. He squeezed him and smiled. “You thought I wasn’t?” He sighed and relaxed his shoulders. “I thought you would hate me. I’m so reckless and get hurt all the time. How could anyone want me if they feel what I feel?” You pulled back to look him in the eyes and you gave him the most genuine smile you had ever had on your face. “You’re stupid. Of course I would be here. And I will stay here. I’ll take care of all your bumps, scrapes, and stabs. The pain means nothing so long as I know you’re ok.” His pointed ears turn a bright red and he averts his gaze to the floor, so you bring your hand to his cheek gently. At first he flinches, but soon closes his eyes, sighs, and leans into your hand, his lip slightly quivering from such tenderness. 
“I do have one question, though.” He hums, not opening his eyes. “Why do my palms always burn? Do you just, like, constantly sit around a campfire?” He chuckles and slowly lifts his head, eyes opening to look at you. He pulls back from you slightly, keeping one arm around your waist as he watches his hand, then back to your face to watch your eyes on his hand. In an instant, his hand is surrounded by fire, the burning in your hand starting up. He must have liked the look on your face because he lets out a snort and then starts laughing, all while you stand there in awe at the power he held. “Holy shit… And… And that’s real fire? Just like that?” You look back at him and he gives you a shy smile and a nod of his head as the fire goes out. There was a sparkle in your eyes that he was absolutely enchanted by and he hoped he would get to see that for the rest of his life. You let out a small huff of amazement and smile brightly. “You are the most amazing person I have ever met,” you say quietly as you watch his features soften as he’s left speechless. 
“Oh get a room,” the guy behind Sapnap says, his voice thick with an accent and sarcasm, the sound of a smile in his words. Sapnap looks at the man and points at him, shooting off a mini fire at him. His shirt catches for a second before the man screams and smacks himself to put it out. You laugh as you watch the exchange and Sapnap looks back at you, thinking of how beautiful your laugh sounds. “Well,” Karl starts. “We have a lot to talk about! Ooooooh this is so exciting! We need to know more about you!!” He grabs both of you and pulls you down the stairs and out to the pond next to the tree out front, the sun finally setting over the hills, casting a gorgeous, fiery glow on your soulmate’s features. You couldn’t wait to see what their life was like. To kiss all of his scars and tell him how amazing he was. To run your fingers through his raven feather-looking hair. Oh how you loved this.
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rintarhue · 4 years ago
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network love ✧ 025 / moon and stars
➪ MAIN MENU | PREVIOUS | EPILOGUE
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Still as the night sky, Kenma stands by his balcony, adoring the scenery before him. The moon often looked lonely, but with the stars by its side, he knows that it will never be alone—even when another day has to come and the sun has to take its spot in the sky once again.
“I wish you were here.” His words linger in the air, longing laced in his tone. He swallows the lump in his throat; seemingly trying to swallow up the sobs that wish to come out. “Fuck - I wish you were here, Y/N.”
Two years ago, Kenma fell in love.
"Hiraku's amazing. You made them perfectly."
He believed, he loved, and he cried.
He believed in the words you uttered, completely entranced with your perspective of the world. He believed the definition you gave for love; how endearing it is, how sweet it is, and how beautiful it is. Though, you never really mentioned how much love can hurt so much—how love can be the cause of one’s wound and also be the medicine for it.
“You once told me how the impossible can happen,” he laughs softly, reminiscing the conversation you two had. “You - you told me it was because of magic,” a small smile follows. “And because of love.”
He shuts his eyes close but the image of you is imprinted on the back of his head.
“Magic has so many connotations in it, and for me, it’s seeing the glimmer in a person’s eyes. It’s seeing their smile… mhm… it’s seeing their smile and then you feel like it can go against the brightness of the sun. You know?”
“Is that why you’re always making the people around you laugh and smile?”
Kenma knew you always wanted to make the people around you happy, though, he never really knew why. He only understood why when he lost you. You wanted to make people remember you as someone who had a smile that can go against the brightness of the sun, someone who had the whole constellation in their eyes, someone who fought well. You wanted to be remembered as someone you always dreamed to be, not only as a person who had a pitiful fate.
“I just… I want you here with me, Y/N. Because of you, I’ve learned how feelings should be; that I shouldn’t suppress them, and instead, express them.” He allows himself to breathe, before continuing to speak. “I’ve learned how it feels to be free, to be truly happy, to love.”
He loved you. Well, he still loves you. How can he ever make the word ‘love’ in any tense, when it’s evident that the feelings he has are still present? That the only tense he can associate it to is the present, the future—and it never will be in the past. His love for you will never be covered in dirt and dust; but it’s quite ironic as what you two had was ephemeral, like dust in the wind.
“You showed me what magic was, what love was; and god, how I wish magic was real.” The coldness of the air kisses Kenma’s skin softly, as he shudders a bit. “Because if magic was real, I’d make sure that you’ll be here with me right now.”
He can still remember the first time he watched the moon and stars with you;
“When I’m gone, just look at the sky, okay?” Your words echo through his ears, “I’ll always be there - just look for the brightest star.”
But now, he watches it all alone.
“People are desperate for love,” the words sit familiar on his tongue. “I’m desperate for love. It’s bizarre how you changed my life, Y/N. Love has always been something hard for me to decipher, it has always been hard for me to be open to others. But, fuck - now I know how painful it is.”
He looked at the sky once again; and then decided to pick the brightest star peeking through his sight—he decided to name it after you. Even if you aren’t physically here anymore, the trace of you will remain; that even if another day has to come, he knows you’ll always be there for him.
The stars will always be there for the moon.
“I love you,”
The first droplet of tears fell from his eyes, and the sky mimicked his cry.
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— GENNFEDNFNSSNBFD PAIN. FUCKING PAIN. IM SORRYE FNRNNRMFNNRNRNFNFNEMMSAMMMEMRMRMFMMFMFMFMFMMFMDMEMWMEMEW
— i hope you all can forgive me 🥲 but can i Just say that ... wow theres sm to unfold in this chap and i can geek about it 🥲 ill leave it to yall if u caught onto em 😫‼️
— also!!!! i wrote this in an hour bc i didnt have time last night and yest so pls dont fry me alive oki T__T THANK U SM I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!
update: wtf its 12 am here LAWL GOOD MORNING!!!!!!!! 🔥🔥🔥
UPDATE 2: EPILOGUE TOM SCREAMS
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taglist in the reblogs! <3
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shewrites02 · 3 years ago
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Wounded |Shikamaru x Reader|
Summary: The reader is wounded while on a mission, This leads to a rift in their relationship
Word count: 2.2k
A/N: I'm new to putting Naruto fanfics on my Account. If you have an suggestions or requests I'm open to all of them. Thank you so much.
fuck! This was your ass when you got home, and you knew it. You pleaded to Lady Tsunade to send you on this mission, short of getting on your hands and knees you said and did anything in hopes of persuading her to say yes. Eventually she caved. Knowing very few things got you this emotional she couldn't bring herself to say no even if she had felt you weren't ready. Plus she knew even if she declined you would devise a scheme to end up there anyway, and she wasn't wrong. You had a plan a, b, and c just incase she was adamant in her refusal.
What you didn't have a plan for was explaining to Shikamaru what you were about to do. Go on a S ranked mission despite just clearing your Chunin examinations. When word finally did get back to him, he was furious! that same morning he marched into the Hokage's office and demanded answers.
"I understand you are angry, but I will not explain myself to the likes of you! You want an explanation you speak to your girlfriend!" She snapped at him.
He knew better than to argue further, to expose himself and allow himself to be vulnerable and open with his concerns even just in front of the Hokage. He also knew she was right, it wasn't really her he was angry at.
When the door swung open and slammed against the wall of yall's shared living space you knew who it was, and what was coming.
"Do you want to get yourself killed?!" Shikamaru belted out down the corridor of the small two bedroom apartment. When you did not respond he barged into the master bedroom forcing your attention.
"Who the fuck do you think you are?" He continued "You must be invincible, death must not be a concern of yours. No your just that fucking strong despite needing three attempts to pass your Chunin exams."
His words stung, even brought tears to your eyes. You tried to remind yourself that they didn't come from a place of malice, but of concern. That did not stop them from hurting, it did not stop them from making you feel small, and weak.
"I need to do this!" You croaked stifling tears that threatened to fall. Your voice trying it's hardest to be strong.
"EVEN IF IT KILLS YOU?!" Shikamaru quickly rebutted.
you took a deep breath before calmly responding, as if to accept the words as they fell out of your mouth.
"Even if it kills me."
The way Shikamaru's eyes fell you could've sworn you'd thrown a kunai straight through his heart. He was gutted, almost to the extent of feeling betrayed.
"Even if that means leaving me here alone."
You could hear the tears trembling in his throat but not a single one fell. He simply turned and walked out the apartment. This was two days before you were supposed to leave, and was the last direct conversation you had with him before you're departure.
While on the journey Kakashi told you two things. One that he had promised Shikamaru that you'd return to the village even if it meant he did not and secondly that Shikamaru had asked him to give you note.
Inside was a detailed apology for suggesting that you were weak or incompetent. Shikamaru said he didn't want you leaving the village believing he had no faith in you or your abilities. Instead he outlined his fears for you. That you weren't ready physically or emotionally to tackle a mission such as this one, that the cost of this mission may have a higher price than you bargained for. Most importantly that you would never come back. He emphasized how much he loved you but was sure to let it be known how angry he was at you. Your complete disregard for his feelings and concern hurt him. He wrote of how unsure it was that he would be there when you returned. He wasn't sure if his methodical mind could forgive such reckless behavior.
That's all you could think of as you laid motionless on the cold forest floor, how correct Shikamaru was. The mission was a success but now you weren't even sure you'd be around to celebrate the victory that seemed to be worth your life just a week ago. In this moment your were heartbroken, distraught, most of all guilty.
The last memory the love of your life would have of you is you telling him that completing some personal vendetta was worth giving up spending the rest of yall's lives together. This was a risk you didn't have to take, a mission you weren't assigned to but you looked Shikamaru in his eyes and told him it was more important than him. And look at you now, fulfilling the very prophecy he feared you would. He would never forgive you for this.
The warm sensation of your blood coating the back of your hands, drew you out of your thoughts. The voices of Sakura and Kakashi were a faint whisper to you, despite the fact they were shouting at each other. You could make out Kakashi telling her to hurry and patch your wounds. He knew it would be a while before the medical core could make it all the way out here, and he wasn't sure you had that much time. He was hoping if Sakura could just stop the bleeding, he could carry you to the village himself. If she could only stabilize you he could do the rest.
"Kashi." You grunted out, twitching your fingers till they meet his hands. His panicked eyes looked over at you and softened some. He was trying hard not to let on how worried he truly was, but the usually stoic ninja, could not handle the thought of breaking his promise.
"Please... tell Shikamaru I'm sorry. Tell him he was right, he'll like that." A pained laugh fumbled from your lips, along with a weak smile.
"Tell him yourself."
You went to protest but felt every bit of chakra drain for your body. Kakashi and Sakura slowly began to fade until everything went black.
-
When you awoke the agonizingly bright lights along with the low hums of all the equipment were a clear indication of where exactly you are, The Leaf Village hospital.
"And she lives." Kakashi announced. A copy of make out tactics in hand, although his masks was up you felt he had a small smile plastered on his face. As you observed his clean, tidy appearance it was clear you had been here longer than it seemed.
"How long have I been here?"
"A week!" Lady Tsunade scolded her arms folded against her chest as she stormed in Sakura trailing behind her. "Just as I said You nearly got yourself killed out there!"
"But I didn't." You rebutted offering a meek smile. Despite Kakashi and Sakura's giggles Lady Tsunade was not amused.
While you scanned the crowded room, you couldn't help but notice Shikamaru was nowhere to be found. You knew he would be angry with you, but so angry he wouldn't even check up on you. Had you really spent a week in the hospital without a single visit from him? was it true you had survive this mission but your relationship had not? The eerie feeling was too strong to ignore, you couldn't even focus on Lady Tsunade chastising you.
"He's come by everyday!" Sakura interrupted pointing over to a bouquet of Jasmines and Roses, Ino no doubt picked for him.
"He.. didn't want to be here when you woke up." Kakashi confessed.
Sakura elbowed him, right in the middle of his ribs causing him to wince in pain. He nurtured his side shuffling his feet slowly away from her. Clearly he wasn't supposed to share that part. But you appreciated Kakashi's honesty, even if it did break your heart.
"I'll be walking you home." he continued throwing the backpack that you carried everywhere with you over your shoulder.
"Remember, you're on bed rest as soon as you make it home. If I even hear that you've be training so help me God!" Lady Tsunade narrowed her eyes to further emphasize her point. Message received loud and clear.
As you and Kakashi strolled through the village neither of you spoke. You were far to focused on what you might find when you returned home, while he just enjoyed the silence. He feared you might request his input with the situation you and Shikamaru had going on. He was sure all he would do is make you feel worse. The copy ninja was a man of few words, and none of them were inherently comforting.
Once yall approached the front door, you noticed the house completely dark, not even the shine of a table lamp. This was peculiar, your home was usually fully lit at this hour. Shikamaru would usually be home to eat lunch or at the very least find some peace away from his comrades to work out a strategy for a new mission he was assigned. No matter what the reason... he was always here and the house was always vibrant. This dark ominous empty home was not one you knew.
You tried to tell Kakashi that you were more than capable of carrying your bookbag in, but he insisted. You think he's just afraid if word gets back to the Fifth Hokage you exerted any type of unnecessary energy the blame would fall on him. But when the two of you walked across the threshold yall immediately stopped.
Shikamaru was home, sitting completely in the dark staring at the ceiling. The sound of the door opening not even making him move an inch.
"I'll, just leave this here." Kakashi mumbled, placing your bag beside you and walking out closing the door behind him.
Shikamaru still didn't move, not a glance your way, not a word spoken. Absolutely still and absolutely silent.  You wanted to jump on him, kiss him all over, tell him just how wrong you were. Tell him that with what you thoughts were your last breaths the only person you wanted to talk to was him. But you didn't, your guilt weighed so heavy on your chest it felt as if you couldn't speak.
You walked over sitting on the couch next to him, your hand meet his cheek and Shikamaru flinched making you quickly draw your hand back. It was as if he had just realized you were even there. Your eyes quickly examined every contour and mark on your boyfriends face. His flushed cheeks, the slightly puffy eyes that gleamed with a sutble red tinge. Could it be that your stoic aloof boyfriend had been sitting here crying all day? The sight shattered your heart into a million pieces. How could you do this to him? How could you be so selfish?
You reached out for his hand grasping it firmly almost as if you didn't grab him now he would be gone forever. In spite of not even being able to look at you Shikamaru held your hand just as tight.
"Shikam-"
"Do you know how mad I am at you?" he interrupted. "Lady Tsunade had to put you in a medically induced coma for a week... A FUCKING WEEK Y/N!"
"I'm sorry you were right. you were right, baby you were right." You cried tears streaming your face.  "I'm sorry."
You didn't wanna argue, you had no fight left in you. For God's sake you just wanted the man you loved to look you in your eyes. Tell you how much he missed you, that he was worried about you, and he's still in love with you. That he'll always be in love with you. But he was as cold as ever, he refused to cast his gaze upon you. instead his eyes continue to linger at the ceiling.
Shikamaru wanted to stay angry, as glad as he was to have you alive here with him he still wanted to punish you. He wanted you to hurt just like he did when he had to watch Kakashi carry you unconscious through the front gates, or when Lady Tsunade told him your injuries were to extensive to wake you up after surgery. or maybe when you looked him in his eyes and proclaimed how little your life was worth in comparison to a mission you weren't even officially assigned. Shikamaru wanted you to feel a fraction of what he has the past two weeks.
"Shikamaru... baby. Please, look at me." You begged him reaching for his face again. This time you forced his eyes to meet yours.
As angry as he was, when Shikamaru looked into your tear filled eyes he melted. After a week of watching you lay basically lifeless in a hospital bed, seeing that glimmer of life in your eyes nothing seemed to matter anymore.
"Baby, I'm so sorr-"
Shikamaru didn't let you finish your sentence, he crashed his lips into yours for a sloppy passionate kiss. He pulled you onto his lap never breaking away from you. His hands held your waist tight, you were sure he would leave marks, but the thought of letting you go was almost traumatizing for him. In his arms, he knew you were safe that you wouldn't run off again.
"I was so worried about you." He mumbled against yours lips, light gasp for air in-between his words. "I love you so much y/n... you can't die on me."
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heyitsyn · 4 years ago
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Manager!Seijoh IWA ROUTE
a/n: uwuwuwuwuwu my mans iwa chan :’)
IM A SIMP FOR IWAIZUMI HAJIME (27) ATHLETE TRAINER
uwu filo!iwa in this :)
and also, listen to lauv while reading this since i wrote this and that song was playing on repeat O_O and also this song
this is my self-request uwu
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HES SUCH A POUTY BABIE BLS LOVE ON HIM
onwards we goooo
hihihihihihi yey im so excited for this yall dont even know
ANYWAYS
so,,,,
when iwa first saw you, he thought you were just a cute little thing
your shorter height, your puffy cheeks, and the wide eyes you had whenever you saw someone, or him, do a really cool spiking move
he initially thought of you as a cute little sister hes never had
ehehe that finna change
then the,,,, bullying thing happened
if youd like to read this part, its right here
when he saw you bloodied, all battered,
dear lordie he was finna break some ankles
ONG I WAS JUST TALKING ABOUT SANGWOO YET HERE I AM
like that image of you will probably stay in his memory until he dies of the ripe age of 200
ngl it kinda traumatized him a little bit of how tired and pained you look with the tears rolling down your face and the blood that was escaping your body through your wounds
god you didnt deserve any of that
you deserved the world and the universe yet some people dared to take away your worth
ooo he was so mad
miyo was,,,, hurt??
can i say that??
i dont wanna,,,, explain bara arms iwa hurting a girl so youre gonna have to imagine that for yourselves
but at the end when they said slap, he didnt just ✨S L A P ✨ her
he ✨ B R O K E   S O M E   A N K L E S ✨
oiks is actually scared of him after that
like oiks had to peel him off of her and towards the infirmary where you and the team were
‘IWAIZUMI HAJIME, STOP!’
oof the first and last time oikawa tooru ever said that full name
he was breathing heavy and he was so ✨ A N G R Y ✨ with what she did to you yet he hears your soft scoldings, telling him off for hurting a girl
he wanted to see you
like right now
iwa tore himself from oikawa’s grasp and ✨ N Y O O M E D ✨ himself to the nurse’s office
there, you sat on the bed with the others scattered either on other beds or on the floor 
you smiled at the sight of him and he walked towards you and engulfed you in his arms
‘youre okay now. im here’
he whispered and you buried your face into his chest, breathing in his unique scent
lavender mixed with peppermint
he refused to leave your side so he ✨ M A D E ✨ some room on the bed beside you to sit and he wrapped his arm around your waist, holding you close
you held his hand while oikawa talked to you and as you shamefully bowed your head
but you were forgiven and everything was all good until the third years really got into plan
makki and mattsun promised to handle it all as they had family in the justice field while oikawa would go and get the girl suspended
‘but what about me?! i want-’
‘iwaizumi, you literally hit her. it’d be best if you’re not involved right now as you were the only one who physically touched her in a harmful manner like that’
ong when it come to y/n, the meme team is replaced by the assassin team
he tried to fight but in the end, 3 overpowered 1 and he was forced to sit back and opted to comfort you instead
he made sure you were safe to walk home but that day, you were the one who asked him to spend time with him
just you two
like after seeing him seethingly enter back into the room, you reached out and held his hand in yours, eyes trained on your fingers fiddling with his
‘iwa-san,,,, you said you downloaded the new godzilla movie?’
you whispered but he could still hear you and his heart swelled at your meek voice
‘yea, i did. and my mom bought those chips you like’
your eyes flitted up to meet his eyes and a soft smile spread on your lips and there was this thumping in his heart
maybe that was the first time that iwaizumi hajime felt differently towards you
a smile that seemed to be differently perceived than the rest
and it wasnt for the whole team
it was for him
and him alone
the trek to his house was quiet but you would hum nursery rhymes or the songs you heard earlier in the radio while skipping every few steps and tightly holding on to his hand
iwaizumi’s olive eyes watched you still radiate energy despite being so hurt for a long time
they then trailed to your linked hands and he unintentionally squeezed it, only figuring out he did it when you looked up to him and squeezed it back with a smile
he wanted to do something to make you forget of what happened
he didnt want you to think about the cruelty and pain so he was going to make sure you would continue smiling 
thankfully, his parents werent home so he wouldnt have to explain why he has a bandage-covered girl with him 
iwa led you upstairs to where his room was and your eyes widened when you saw what was inside
tiny action figurines of animes like bakugo from boku no hero academia or a tiny pikachu on his desk
there was a large country flag that you didnt recognize and a few godzilla posters and volleyball players decorating beside it
however, besides those normal things you wouldve expected,
there were many polaroids
polaroid pictures that were everywhere with no specific layout pattern and just placed anywhere that had room
iwa watched as you dazedly walked forward and entered the room to move towards the wall by his desk that had the most pictures against it
from pictures of him and oikawa to the third years to him and his parents or just the sunrise and human silhouettes
your fingers reached forward and traced the picture of him and the third years when they were still first years and took a spontaneous trip to the beach
‘mattsun stole his dad’s car and drove us to the beach without a license’
iwaizumi’s voice answered your questions and you looked back, shimmering eyes
this room,,, wasnt just a normal, teenage boy’s room
this was a room that represented iwaizumi hajime
from his natural character description like his love for volleyball evident in the volleyball player posters to the underneath description that was hidden like his love for godzilla and his love of taking pictures of the people he cares about the most
it was all that made up iwaizumi hajime
your feet took you to stand in front of him, still standing at the doorway, and you stood on your toes to try and be eye-level with him
‘youre really cool, iwa-san’
you whispered and his ears turned red, not from the compliment, but by the close distance between you two
iwa clearedhis throat and ruffled your hair roughly, pushing you down slightly back to the balls of your feet
‘i already knew that, brat. now go and sit over there and be comfortable or whatever while i go get the food’
he hurriedly turned to hide his growing red face but you stopped him
‘iwa-san,,, ano,,, can,, i borrow a hoodie?’
you mumbled, nervously thinking he might refuse 
but he grunted a response, not bothering to turn around
‘take your pick’
you smiled and thanked him before bounding over to the wardrobe that was pushed against the wall across his bed that was against the corner by his window
inside had so many hoodies and there were also shirts that were hung up on the other half
they were all graphic tees that either had american bands or anime or game references
opting for a mint green hoodie that says ‘SONIC NYOOM’, you had an undershirt under your button up and as you slipped the bloodied long sleeve off, he swung the door open, eyes focused on the tray of coke filled glasses
then he looked up and almost dropped it at the sight of you,,, like that
‘OH MY GOD SORRY’
he shrieked and carefully but hurriedly backtracked back to the hallway
ofc you were shocked too but you quickly put the hoodie on and went to get him
iwaizumi’s heart was hammering in his chest and he was VERY red with embarrassment 
how could he see you like that?!
a girl who wasnt his shouldnt be seen like that by his eyes!
a touch on his arm reminded him of his position and he was still holding the tray but it was clear from the liquid in the cups that he was shaking slightly
‘iwa-san, its okay. i still had a shirt on so dont misunderstand’
you reasoned and he nodded, still not looking at you
the beginning of the movie was quite awkward as you both were sitting next to each other on the floor, backs against his mattress while the laptop played godzilla in front of yall
but it seems it was just him who was feeling this way bc you were intrigued at this weird monster that was squshing building under its foot and you continued munching on the food
iwa stood up and coughed
‘im going to take a shower’
you paused it and stared up at him, a chip halfway in your mouth
‘oh? you want me to wait for you?’
he agressively shook his head
‘no! its okay i watched it already. just,,,, watch it’
at the end, his words came out jumbled in his hurry to go and calm his heart down
you shrugged and unpaused the movie to continue watching
iwa spent his time in the shower, thinking and trying to think of stupid thoughts like the time oikawa almost choked on a peanut when they were in middle school to distract him of thoughts of how adorable you were
ONG HE WAS JUST SHOWERING AND INNOCENTLY DOING SHOWER THINGS
‘no, i said she was like a sister to me. and a sister she’ll remain’
okay ngl even though theyre not related, im worried yall would be like ‘iNcESt’ but bls a lot of people have tried to sibling-zoned people yet realized they liked them in THAT way
as he wrapped himself with a towel, he then realized
oh my god he didnt bring clothes
LMAO NOOOO IWAAAAA
iwa frantically looked around and he saw his mother’s sakura themed robe and he paused, arguing silently with him if he should wear it
well, it was either that or he went back into the room and showed you,,,,,, this
sucking in a sharp breath, he kept the towel around his waist and slipped his arms through the tight arm holes and he awkwardly tried to keep it tied since he was so much bigger than his tiny mom
what is happening
you saw the door opening and excitedly turned to tell him about this one scene when your voice died down in your throat at the sight of him 
here was iwaizumi hajime, ultra muscle buff man who gets abs with a simple glance of the gym, wearing an all too-tight pink, cherry blossom print robe that was so tight the tie around it was shaking to keep it together
‘dont’
he whispered and that snapped your remaining surprise to double over in laughter
‘its so cute! iwa-san, youre so cute!’
you shrieked and he growled and hurriedly went to to grab grey sweatpants and a shirt before running straight back to the bathroom
when he finally came back out, his face was still red and he was pouting as he sat next to you back to his seat
he could feel you staring at him while looking constipated as you held your laugh in and the second your eyes met, your giggles fell out
iwa rolled his eyes
‘yes yes let it out’
‘hehe, iwa-san, i didnt know you had that style’
‘it isnt! i didnt want to walk in here practically naked with you in the room!’
he growled and you nodded, still not quite believing it
‘hai hai. just say you like pink, i wont tell’
you waved and iwa felt offended
‘what do you mean ‘hai hai’?! its really not!’
your lips pursed to keep more giggles in and iwa growled again before lunging to grab your sides and tickling you 
of course being careful to not touch your wounds
you shrieked at the ticklish feeling and iwa laughed as you made weak attempts to push him off
‘huh? what was that? whatd you say? cant talk anymore, can ya?’
he teased
‘NO!!!! IWA-SAAAAN!!!!!’
you shouted in between your laughter and he finally let up when you squealed out your apologies and promised to never say it again
you breathed air into your lungs and sat back up to recollect yourselves 
iwa saw the strands that escaped your bun and they were scattered everywhere looking messy with your flushed cheeks and teary eyes
oh my god you were beautiful
he was so happy that you still kept that smile despite what happened and he was going to fight to keep it there
forever
it was about nearly the end when you finally realized how different iwaizumi’s hair looked
‘oi, iwa-san, your hair is not naturally spiky?’
he continued eating the chips while still watching the movie
‘what would you expect? even shittykawa’s hair is like this. did ya know that he wakes up extra early to curl it into that shitty mess?’
your jaw dropped
‘EEEHHHH???!!!!!!!’
later, you asked him how he does his hair for school and he blindly reached for the gel that was resting on his desk before tossing it to you
‘here’
you looked at it and flickered over to his hair and then you had the greatest realization
‘GODZILLA-SAMA!’
you pointed and he stopped eating, turning to give you a confused look
‘ha?’
you shrieked in an another round of laughter
‘IWA-SAN LIKES GODZILLA-SAMA SO MUCH HE DOES HIS HAIR AFTER HIM!!!!’
you doubled over to the floor, clutching your stomach and iwaizumi’s flustered expression made you laugh harder
he knew you were smart but,,, not this smart
you figured out his secret
the secret he’s hidden since he was practically a toddler
even his best friend, the guy hes known since he was born, never made the connection
yet here you are, figuring it out not even a year of knowing him
was this part of the many reasons he,, felt his heart beat for you?
oikawa was relieved that you had the bright twinkle in your eyes the next time he saw you and you were actively talking to iwaizumi in that early morning practice
‘oh? y/n-chan, is iwa-chan your best friend now?’
he tried not to sound jealous for his own best friend’s closeness to you and he added a teasing smile for extra measure
okay that hurted me a bit
iwaizumi snarled and blasted the volleyball towards his face before he could even yell or shout
‘iwa-san, dont do that’
you chided softly, small hands wrapping around his muscly arm
but iwa patted your head
‘deserving people deserve things to happen to them’
you rolled your eyes but smiled at him
‘hai hai’
the next week, iwa still kept a close eye on you in case someone else decided to mess with you 
but you told him that you swear youd tell him if someone did and he trusts you so he backed off a little
one day, he was eating lunch with the other third years in their classroom when you busted through the door, excitedly holding your phone
‘iwa-san! i figured out what country your flag was!’
he was halfway of shoving rice in his mouth when iwa looked at you
‘oh? you couldve just asked me though?’
you pouted and went to pull a chair from another desk to sit beside him
‘nooo. i wanted to work for that information. so you’re from the philippines, iwa-san?’
he nodded proudly
‘yep’
your eyes shone with interest
‘really?! you look japanese so it must be one of your parents. hey, iwa-san, which island are you from? i read about them and they have like 7641 islands-’
the others watched as you read through the article in your phone and iwa wasnt even following your words, instead staring at you with a dazed look and a lovesick smile
mattsun, makki, and oikawa exchanged looks of surprise because in all the years theyve known him especially oikawa, iwa was never interested in girls and such
he was a straight forward man with goals and straight sight to get them done with no distractions like relationships or love
yet here he was
slowly falling in love with you without even knowing he is
he continued to fall with the simplest things about you
from the perfume that you wore everyday to the way you would tuck your hair behind your ear when you were talking to someone
little quirks he used to miss was now being noticed even if you were right behind him and not in his line of vision
now, the boys were starting to see the difference of their precious ace
it was as if when he started to like you, they knew immediately by how he was acting
then one day during practice, you were late and they were all looking around for you and when they couldnt find you, they met back in the gym with nervous looks
iwa was already pacing around, a scary aura radiating off of him, and kindaichi, who went with him to look around the school, warned the others of iwaizumi’s worry
‘he was slamming doors open and he was walking so fast i had to run to even keep up with him’
then you busted through the gym door
you were actually picking up food for the team and sweets and you were held up when makki’s puffs were still being cooked
they rallied around you to make sure you werent hurt and you assured them but iwa pulled them away like picked them up and threw them off to the side and took you in his arms
iwa thought you were hurt and he was so worried something happened to you again
the hug was bone-crushing with how hard he was squeezing you but you felt his worry though and you freed your arms to wrap them around his neck
‘im okay, iwa-san’
you whispered in his ear and he nodded
‘let me hold you for a second’
he mumbled and you nodded
‘oi, theres food in the bags so make sure you eat it all. coach paid for it all so dont leave behind anything’
the mention of the food distracted them from you and iwa and they piled on top of each other to reach their food first
iwa was grateful that you distracted the others from seeing him being vulnerable towards you
‘i thought-’
‘shh,,, you have me right here, right now. safe and sound’
you knew how much seeing you all battered messed him up and his attempt of making you forget about it has been
and his worry of you being gone without no sign of where you went will forever be there and he will always have that thought in the back ofhis mind
the next time you came over, you actually met his parents
since you went home early before, you didnt catch his parents when they came home around 10 minutes after you left
but this time, they were already home with his mom cooking dinner while his father was sitting on the dining chair reading a newspaper
iwa walked through the door, shouting he was home, and you did the same thing to be customary
oof his parents were surprised
his mom turned around to share a look of surprise with her husband
sure they havent seen tooru in a while but they were pretty sure his voice wasnt that high pitched
right?
‘hajime, did you hit tooru so much you ruined his-’
then his mother stopped talking at the sight of you holding iwa’s hand tightly when yall stepped around the corner
you sheepishly smiled at them and bowed your head in greeting
oh my
so this was why iwaizumi hajime-san was really really really handsome
his parents were freaking good looking
like his mother was aphrodite with her flawless melanin skin and doe shaped eyes with a mole under her left eye
and his father was like ares, so handsome yet still manly and his appearance was a special type of good-looking with his buffness and ruffed appearance
‘iwa-san, i didnt know your parents were gods’
you mumbled, still staring at them
iwaizumi choked and coughed, flustered
‘oh my!’
his mother placed a hand over her mouth
‘hello’
his father stood up to walk in front of you and held his hand out
‘i’m hajime’s father’
you let go of hajime’s hand to shake his own with both of your hands
‘really nice to meet you! i’m l/n y/n! seijoh volleyball manager! first year!’
you introduced then stepped aside to fully bow 90 degrees
iwaizumi thought it was so cute of how flustered you were at meeting his parents
‘ay nako! nak, i didnt know you had such a beautiful girlfriend!’
she squealed and hurriedly went to stand in front of you and gently grasped your arms to stand you back straight and took a good look at you
‘youre so beautiful, iha. nice skin, pretty eyes, ang ganda!’
even with your research of tagalog, you didnt quite understand what she was saying
iwa noticed your slightly confused expression and he laughed, tucking his hands in his pockets
‘sorry, my nay speaks in taganese when she gets excited’
‘t-taganese?’
‘tagalog and japanese’
you nodded in understanding
it was time to put your basic reserach to test
‘hello po’
you greeted her and nervously took her hand and pressed the back of it to your forehead before slowly lowering it down and letting go
her wide eyes made you think you did something bad or even offensive!
‘i-i’
‘HAY NAKO, HAJIMEE~!’
she shrieked 
‘YUNG-!!! YUNG-!!!’
okay im terrified
iwa noticed his mother’s malfunction and gently wrapped his arm around her shoulder and veered her back to her kitchen
‘sorry about her, l/n-chan. its just,,,, hajime hasnt brought home a girl before. and you doing that mustve done it in for her’
you worriedly watched hajime calm his mom down with a smile and talking to her hushed
in their perspective,,,
‘shes so nice, nak! marry her, okay? shes very pretty and she made an effort to please your nanay, so go and marry her!’
ohmylord im nervous
initially, iwa only wanted to go and hang out with you and watch a movie
not have a full dinner with his family
lmao i shouldve told you that youve been friends for months now
his mother cooked sinigang and adobo and more filipino dishes, adding even more when she saw you were joining them
the dining table was covered with a large plate full of food and you were so fascinated because this was a side of iwa that you wanted to know more about
‘wow!’
you said, not thinking, at the deep-fried fish that still had its eyeballs intact
iwa genuinely thought you would’ve shyed away from it in disgust but your eyes were glistening with genuine interest
‘iwa-san! youre so lucky you get to eat this stuff!’
you told him, looking over at his direction
while mrs iwaizumi was lading in the soup into the big bowl, mr iwaizumi was sitting at the dining table, watching your interaction and hajime telling you what each food was and your noises of surprise
he watched his son laugh when you said the palabok reminded you of the orange boy hinata 
and he also watched his son look at you so lovestruck and exactly like how he looks at his wife
soon, his mother finished and they rounded the table before saying a quick prayer to bless the food and digging in
‘so, what do you want to start with, iha?’
mrs iwaizumi asked and your wide eyes looked around
‘hm, im not sure. whats your favorite iwa-san?’
you looked to your right towards hajime who was busy eating and stopped before pointing his lips towards a direction
‘that one’
‘hah?’
you asked 
mrs iwaizumi laughed at her son’s actions
‘sorry, l/n-chan, my son has adapted my traits. he was pointing to this, adobo. do you want some?’
‘yes please’
the smell made your mouth water and you started to tuck in
maybe it was your managerial instincts, but you used your napkin to wipe hajime’s lips and he was also used to this and turned his head to make it easier for you then he went to grab the water jug and re-fill your glass
once it was done, you both silently went back to eating
his parents watched his exchange and it was like watching a married couple taking care of each other
‘so, l/n-chan, you said you were their manager’
mr iwaizumi started and you nodded, wiping your lips
‘yes. i have been for a while now and please, call me y/n’
‘hajime actually told us he had a new manager for his team and tooru told us too. but we didnt know you were a girl. its just so interesting for hajime to bring you home as he has never really had any female friends’
mrs iwaizumi’s comment made you chuckle and iwa’s eyes widened in embarassment
‘nay! of course ive had female friends! ive had friends from all genders!’
he reasoned but you teasingly smiled at him
‘ah, im not really surprised. iwa-san doesnt exactly have the appearance that girls are brave enough to approach’
he sent you a betrayed glance
‘hah?! what’s that supposed to mean?!’
you shrugged, going back to your food
‘im just saying that you always have this intense look in your eyes and youre always frowning. but its cute so its fine. and besides, i dont think theyve seen you laugh since you dont really smile a lot, iwa-san’
‘but you’ve seen me smile!’
‘eung. but its only to me. if they knew the stuff i knew like you being a godzilla fan or your collection of succelents, theyd see you like oikawa-san’
‘HAH?! YOU SEE ME LIKE SHITTYKAWA?!’
mrs iwaizumi held her husband’s hand on the table as they watched you both bicker and tease each other with a smile
hajime has always been on the rougher side of things and he doesnt really have many close friends other than the team and even then, tooru is the only one he can really be himself around
yet here you are, bringing out the boy hajime really is and making him laugh, a sound his parents dont really hear outside the house
and your eyes
god, your eyes held admiration, life,,,, and you might not know this yet,, but love
her eyes trailed her son who teasingly headbutted you and you faking a surprise and doing the same
then you heard his father’s cough which brought you back to where you were and the situation and the people that were there
you felt embarrassment creeping up inside you and you bowed
‘im sorry for acting like that, iwaizumi-san. i-’
‘no, dont apologize, darling. please, dont’
her soft smile made the nerves in you ease and hajime’s father winked at him and he knew exactly what his father was trying to say
after dinner, you volunteered to wash the plates but they veered you away from there and towards the living room 
‘oh my god, pops! stop her!’
hajime whined because he knows what his mother was going to do
she was going to show him his baby pictures
you sat on the beige couch and watched as she reached under the coffee table and revealed a few albums that had iwaizumi hajime written on the cover
‘now, y/n-chan, hajime wasnt always this pouty. in fact, he used to always have a smile on his face and laughed at the littlest things! like right here! a leaf fell on him and he-’
stories of his childhood was exchanged throughout the night and you were laughing so hard that tears were falling out of your eyes while hajime wrapped your shoulders with his arm and he would squeeze you tightly whenever you made fun of him
‘oh dear! iwa-san! you-!’
you didnt finished as you continued to laugh and he sighed
‘nay, can we go eat dessert now?’
he asked his mother and she was beginning to feel sorry for him so she smiled and nodded
‘okay. hajime, come help me’
‘iwaizumi-san, i can-’
‘no, y/n-chan. dont you worry your pretty little head about anything and just look through more of these pictures’
hajime followed his mother to their kitchen before she stopped and turned around
his mother’s height was around 5′1 so she had to look up to meet his eyes and her hands were clasped around his biceps
she is definitely beautiful and he cursed at how little he got from his mother other than her skin color
mrs iwaizumi married her husband and immigrated to japan to have a family and your polite action from earlier moved her as she hasnt experienced that in nearly 2 decades
‘nay, shes,,,, just a friend’
he reasoned, a wobbly smile to cover up his want for that title to change
yet mothers def knows best and saw right through it
she gave him a firm look with furrowed eyebrows and pursed lips
‘nak, dont lie to yourself. i raised you to never tell a lie and lying to yourself is considered lying to someone. she’s not your KAibigan, shes your kaIBIGan’
now, hajime knew a little bit of tagalog as his mother made sure he was able to at least speak to his relatives back home
so he got a hint of what she was saying yet was confused 
then he realized it
his blush creeped up his neck and he chuckled, ducking his head low to avoid his mother’s eyes
‘nak, listen to me. papunta ka pa lang, pabalik na ako. youre still growing and you may be confused right now, but make sure to think wisely and dont live with regrets. nanay doesnt want you to go through it all by yourself since she knows how hard it was. so please, listen to me and pursue her. shes special, hajime. she makes you so, so happy. i see it in your eyes, her eyes, god has fated you together. i feel it’
now if a filipino mother actually tells their son to go after a girl, thats a pretty big thing as its known that mothers are the hardest to convince and are fiercely protective of their sons, especially if its an only son, but mrs iwaizumi literally tells hajime to go court you because she sees how happy you make him and is willing to let hajime go to you 
definitely his mother’s words stuck to him and as he walked you home, he was busy thinking that he was quiet and you were worried as he would be talking right now
‘iwa-san? you okay?’
you asked and he blinked, taken back to reality from his daydream
‘hm, yea’
he answered to look at you
hes been pining for months now and he slipped his hand into yours, holding it tightly
uwu if you want to see iwa moments with y/n, read through the seijoh manager series as theres a lot of them in there
he wanted you yet, he knew it would be selfish of him to keep you in the future
he would be a college student while you’re in your 2nd year
would you want to be so far away from him?
could you handle it?
‘yanno, iwa-san, your dad told me something interesting’
you suddenly said, squeezing his hand and kicking rocks while looking up at the night sky
‘what was it? something embarrassing?’
he immediately feared that they told you that story when he was still potty training and he fell straight into the toilet 
‘hmm,,, no. he told me that he met your nanay when she was a high school student and he was a in an intern at your lolo’s company’
iwa listened and he had a smile at how you said the tagalog word for grandfather
‘he said she almost ran him over by her bike and she fled but they met again when she visited your lolo. through that, they became friends and then she confessed to him. apparently, he declined because she was younger than him, although just 3 years, and he was leaving for his own country in a few months so he didnt know if she would wait for him’
were,,,, you reading his mind?
iwa knew of his parents story yet with you telling it, it sounded a million times more interesting
‘yet she promised him. thats it, just a promise. that she would remain faithful to him, she would keep herself for him and when she finally graduates, she would go and find him and they could be happy together. he said it was the longest 3 years of his life yet when he saw in the airport, he felt like the wait was worth it. because he gets to hold the embodiment of happiness in his arms for the rest of his life’
you finished and he hummed
‘times have changed, y/n’
‘even you?’
you stopped walking and he naturally stopped too
‘would you wait for me like he did if i promised myself to you? if i promised you that despite the few years of waiting, i would still be yours and remain yours until we’re ready to be together?’
WHAT IS HAPPENING!!!!!!!
iwa’s heart was drumming in his chest and he wanted so desparately to look at you in the eyes but you were making that impossible as your head was bowed and your eyes were fixed on the concrete you both stood on
‘of course, i would’
your head snapped up and e/c clashed with olive eyes 
‘i would wait for you. we may,,, be young right now. and they might think we’re,,, being impulsive. but i dont care. because right now, all that matters, is you and me. we can think about the consequences later, but right now, i just want to kiss you’
he admitted, red ears seen by the moonlight
your body shook
‘do it, no balls’
well,,,, he has the balls
and under the moon, at 8:34 pm, iwaizumi hajime kissed you
OML THIS REMINDS ME OF THAT SEIJOH SHORT WHEN HE WAS TALKING TO OIKAWA AND HIS NEIGHBORS ARE LIKE ‘AH SHITE HERE WE GO AGAIN’
it didnt come as a surprise to the team when yall announced your relationship
well,, you both actually didnt tell them outright until like weeks later
what can you say?
you and iwa are very private people and you dont really like to show off in public
even though yall lit rally are stuck to the hip and he does things that he doesnt even think hes doing but he is totally doing
you were only caught by,,, guess who
mrs iwaizumi
it was weeks when she met up with mrs oikawa bc theyre totally best friends and thats why their sons are best friends
she told her of her son’s girlfriend and how sweet you were and how mrs oikawa should be jealous that her son doesnt have a girlfriend like that and the standards for oikawa’s future girlfriend was raised just by that teasing
oikawa literally came into after school practice after a phone call with his mother, fuming
you were talking to kindaichi and yahaba with iwa beside you, arm around your waist totally not obvious guys
and yall just saw an angry oikawa stomping towards yall
‘y/n-chan, iwa-chan, why the hell did my mom just call me and tell me that im not allowed to bring home a girl if she doesnt have h/c with s/c (skin color) and e/c and h/m (height measurement)?’
you shrugged
‘oikawa-san, i’ve never even met your mom before’
but iwa had a hunch
‘ahh,,,, my mom mustve been bragging to your mom. yanno how they are’
oikawa shot him a disbelieving look
‘IWA-CHAN! ITS BAD ENOUGH THAT YOU GOT A GIRLFRIEND AND I DONT! BUT ITS WORSE THAT YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS AFFECTING MY FUTURE ONE!’
he ranted, completely unaware that he just outed your entire relationship to the team
tbh they werent even surprised
like they were all ‘damn now shes taken. but cant say i didnt see that coming’
they took it pretty well too
they know how iwa is and they literally respect this mans and if anything, out of the whole team, he is the best candidate for your boyfriend
dating iwa is totally normal and yall just have increased touches?? like i dont know how to explain like he’s constantly holding your hand or arm around your waist or shoulder etc
literally nothing changed
you still have dinners at his house and iwa also knows your family and all that
and the most important thing is,
he kept that promise
even when he was literally at the other side of the world,
he still remained yours and you kept your own promise and waited patiently for his return
OOOOO TIMESKIP IWAIZUMI HAJIME (27) ATHLETE TRAINER
a little girl with bouncing dark brown hair was giggling as she maneuvered herself around the tall people
a shout from her parents and little sister was only making her run faster until she crashed into the legs of the person she’s been looking for
his blue jersey was similar to hers and she raised her arms up with a bright smile
‘uncle!’
she yelled and he chuckled before hoisting her up to his arms
‘ah, reyna-chan, didnt mom and dad tell you to wait for them? look! tala-chan is crying because you left her’
she followed his finger to her little sister, who was in her father’s arms, crying and reaching out for her
‘nee-chan!’
she screeched
finally, her parents were there and you were scolding her for running off
‘reyna, just dont do that again’
you said and she nodded, pouting and holding her uncle’s thumb
‘thank you, tooru-san. i dont know what i would do if she got lost’
oikawa grinned then gently patted the hat-covered head of the newborn baby girl that was strapped to your chest
‘hehe, its okay, y/n-chan. after all! uncle is always there to save reyna-chan!’
she shrieked when he held her up and hajime shook his head in his antics
‘where’s the others? i saw them in the stands but-’
he was cut off when he heard the shouts and yells from the other side that could only belong to your boys
‘woooo!!!!’
kindaichi’s voice echoed through the place and mattsuhana were rushing to greet their goddaughters
tala shyly accepted the arms of mattsun while makki was squealing quietly when darna was holding his finger tightly as she slept
‘taka-san, wanna hold her? she’s easier to hold when she’s sleeping’
‘oh can i?’
his eyes held the stars as the 11-month-old raised her fist then lowered it back down, sleep still heavy on her
‘waaa~ darna-chan is growing really quickly’
kunimi whispered, peering over his senpai to look at the baby whos eyes kept fluttering
you chuckled while looking at oikawa and him playfully bouncing reyna
‘tooru-san, congratulations on your win. it seems you’ve beaten hajime this time’
you complimented and the brunette smiled brightly at you, adjusting the little girls in his arms
‘ei, y/n-chan, i’ll beat him next time, and next time and the next time!’
every time he said ‘next’ he gave his goddaughter a kiss on her cheek making her giggle
your husband was pouting at the reminder of japan’s loss and you reached over to wrap your arms around him causing hajime to turn his head away from you
‘aww, my 4th baby is sad now’
you cooed and cupped his face delicately on your hands making him sulk and whine
the others, watching the scene, continue to be surprised at this side of their captain that remains to only be caused by you
‘ugh, nearly a decade later and theyre still sappy’
yahaba gagged and watari slapped his back
‘let them be happy’
‘come on! im in the mood for spaghetti! you like spaghetti, tala-chan?’
‘eung!’
mattsun cheered with kindaichi and she raised her hands to share the same energy
once everyone was situated in a restaurant and ordered, small talks were shared around the table of the past
‘haha, spaghetti is how your baba found out about you, tala-chan’
yahaba’s comment made the walking group laugh at the memory of seeing the video you sent in the seijoh group chat
‘i wanted to be creative with my second child since my firstborn was revealed by this loudmouth’
oikawa winced at the indirect diss at him
‘y/n-chan! i was really excited to find out i was going to be an uncle!’
‘youre already an uncle, bakakawa!’
hajime has toned down the insults to keep it pg for the children
‘but-!’
they started to argue, the oldest daughter looking disinterested as she sees this happening or hearing it whenever her dad and uncle video chat
‘it took me forever to find a ‘prego’ pasta sauce in the grocery store like i dont know why. was there a shortage?’
you complained, remembering the frustration
your fellow first years snickered at you and kindaichi prodded fun at you
‘is that why you just outright told him you were pregnant the day you found out?’
you rolled your eyes and watched makki and mattsun and tala watch the youngest as she wiggled her fists in the air and was awake enough to babble ‘makki’ over and over again
that was her first word and although she is now able to say a few words, she still repeats her first word over and over again
‘we had a fight and it just came out so of course i didnt have time to prepare!’
you defended and hajime finished his antics with oikawa just as you said that
‘what-what was your words again? ‘i really want to push you off the roof right now but i want my baby to meet their bastard father first?’‘
you gasped at that regretful statement and punched him in the arm
‘hajime! stop!’
you whined and covered your face with the sleeves of your his hoodie
‘hehe, y/n, you should do that again’
kyotani teased and you glared at him
‘shut up kyotani’
eyebrows were raised
‘eh? are you more hormonal?’
‘do you realize you already have 3 daughters?’
‘iwaizumi-san really wants to have a volleyball team family’
‘at least wait a year and a half, you animals’
‘so,, like hes that good huh?’
hajime growled and leaned over to intimidate but you snarled and jumped on your feet, being held back by the arms by kindaichi and hajime to stop yourself from leaping across the table to kill yahaba
‘keep talking like shite and i’ll make sure none of you become the godfather of this baby’
okay what
one, did you just curse
and two, this baby?!
‘im big sister again?!’
reyna ruined the surprised silence and then chaos ensued
‘WHAT!’
‘BABY?!’
‘THIS BABY?!’
you just realized what you said and smirked at the chaos you created and sat back down, leaning on the back of the chair and smugly taking a sip of your water
‘oh the power i hold in my hands’
you teased and oikawa pointed at you
‘when! how long!’
you looked at hajime who was so shocked that his eyes glazed over and a passerby wouldve thought he was dead
‘apparently 3 months’
oikawa started counting and his eyes widened at that thought
‘you-! you stayed in argentina! in my house! my house-!’
‘yep. both of them created under your house’
what 
!!!!!
hajime fainted 
oikawa screamed
a/n: okay i admit i got a little too carried away with this one. i just love filo!iwa and this was mostly written in his pov bc cmon we all know we love iwa and fell in love w him the moment we saw him
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cunningambitousdetermined · 3 years ago
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i need a plot for this
yall so ive been trying really hard to get back into writing and i went to a writing camp this summer. im going to post a poem that i wrote there later bc im super proud of it but right now i have something else i need help with. SO basically there was a prompt about someone finding a letter or a note. that’s the prompt. so i wrote something, really liked it BUT I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE TO TAKE IT FROM HERE. my basic ideas involve the two characters meeting each other again to do SOMETHING WHICH I DONT KNOW and slowly arcane (youll see when you read the story below) thaws and falls in love with kalon and kalon has always been in love with her and its like best friends to enemies to friends to lovers ya know? ANYWAY if you dont hate me for being inactive and needy, please read this and help me. 
Dear Arcane,
It’s been a while, hasn’t it? 10 years. Wow. I don’t even know if you’ll ever get this, you could’ve moved. You could be dead. Oh god, that’s dark. You’re not dead, someone would’ve told me, I’m sure. So that must mean that there’s a good chance you have this, but I’m not even sure if you’ll read it.
He was right, as he most often was. Arcane had not planned to read the letter from the moment she read her name on the envelope, written in a neat sort of messy handwriting that could only come from one person. The letter had been sitting at her desk for a week before memories began to drown her and she knew she had to open it.
That’s not the point though, I’m sure you’ll read this. You’ve always been a sucker for the intimacy of written letters. Maybe that’s why I wrote to you instead of calling.
Arcane closed her eyes, the pounding of the memories at the door slowly consuming her. She took a deep breath and let them in. The whispers started to fill the room, every word echoing off the walls, like her past had become a living, breathing thing in her room. How could he write her now? After all these years. Anger reared it's small head in the back of her mind. How could he be so casual as if he wasn't the boy who ripped her heart out and tore it to pieces. 
Maybe it’s because I did read all the letters you wrote to me. Even after the voicemails stopped filling my phone and the emails ran dry, your letters kept coming.
She remembers writing those letters, the pen shaking in her hand as it hit the paper. She remembers wondering what you said to someone like him, a friend who left you behind. The squeeze in her chest that tightened each time he didn’t reply. The break in her heart when the last letter she ever wrote was returned to her doorstep.
If you’ve read this far without tearing my letter to pieces, then I would say this is a good start to our reunion. I’ve missed you. Your stubborn ways, always trying to keep me safe. But you always came with me wherever I went anyway. I miss your secret smile, the one you saved just for me. The treehouse we built in your yard. Do you miss that? I wonder if you wonder about me. I wonder if I can even ask that of you.
She did miss them. But, those things that she missed were long gone. The treehouse was overgrown with vines, Arcane was sure you couldn’t even get into it anymore. She went with him on his stupid adventures because what would she do if he left and met new people? He would leave her and she would be alone. So she desperately followed him blindly, hoping it would keep him close. Arcane missed her secret smile, the genuine one she had always saved for him. He missed it. How could he miss something that he destroyed. With his one and only letter to her, he demolished any leftover love for him that hid in her heart. He couldn’t ask if Arcane wondered about him. That wasn’t fair. That night, ten years ago, was still a raw wound in her soul that she was pretty sure would never heal.
~
The rain was relentless that night, banging against every edge of the house, but a little girl was waiting by the door, not even flinching as the lightning and thunder clapped furiously. Arcane peeked her head above the window frame to find the mailman running through the storm, his frantic steps pounding through the floor of the house. Her eyes lit up with a hope that was slowly fading with each mail drop. She opened the door and hid the small smile that started to spread up her face with a cough.
“Hi, Dan!” Arcane’s voice gave away the excitement that was flooding her system.
“Hey, Arcane.” Dan couldn’t help the pitiful grin that he gave her. She waited by the door for him every day and each day there was no letter for her. It must be soul-crushing, he thought, waiting for a letter that never comes.
“Is there…?” Arcane was practically on her tiptoes at this point. Dan rifled through the letters, dread settling as her name wasn’t there. Again. And then there was a squeal. “Oh, Dan! I found it! I knew- I knew it- I told them!” Her sentences didn’t even come out fully as she beamed, her smile brighter than any ray of the sun.
Arcane had run into the house, a breeze following in her wake. Plopping down into the soft plush couch, she ripped open the envelope, not caring about the paper that flew everywhere in the room. A paper fluttered out, floating toward the ground. Arcane grabbed it, hands shaking, she could practically feel the sweat dripping down her face. Words were the easiest way to break someone. The letter only contained eleven words, yet they would stick with her for the rest of her life.
Stop writing me. None of it was real. You were nothing.
Eleven words. And they shattered her. Crumbling, shattering, a million pieces breaking. Sobs racked through her whole body, her chest shaking and trembling with each broken breath. She caught her face in the mirror hanging off the pale wall and didn’t recognize the girl that stared back. You were nothing. A scream tore through her, the ache of her heart so raw that even the sun seemed to cry, rain dripping onto the panes of the windows. And slowly, so very slowly, Arcane buried the ache and gathered the shattered pieces of her heart and encased them in an impenetrable cage, never to opened again.
~
The ache was still present now, ten years after the letter had arrived. The dullness of her buried hurt made her clench her fists around the letter that sat in her hand now, the same lopsided handwriting adorning it.
But, that’s not why I’m writing this letter. I’m writing this with an actual purpose, if you can imagine that. I didn't just write to rehash our friendship. 
Arcane could feel her eyes narrowing, fighting the urge to roll her eyes at the inanimate piece of paper. An actual purpose? To break her heart all over again? This time she did roll her eyes, even though no one was there to see it. But, it wasn’t the fact that he wrote her after all these years or that his tone was friendly throughout that made her body freeze. It was the last line that had the hairs on the back of her neck standing to attention.
In all the years that Arcane had known him, he'd never been very dependent. He often just struggled in silence and figured them out on his own. Not once, not ever, had has asked for help. But, there the sentence was inked in his slanted, loopy writing. 
I need your help.
Love,
Kalon
  ~~everything below here is stuff that doesnt have to be a part of the story but i still liked it and where it was going (idk please give me ideas)~~
The quiet, shock of the room seemed to weigh on Arcane. She flopped back onto her bed, the soft pillows cushioning her landing. I need your help. Those few, simple words, tugged at the strings that bound her heart. He needed her. The thought was fleeting as just as quickly as it came, it left. In its spot was anger. Now he needed her? After all those years when she needed him? What did he do then? Nothing. And that’s what she was going to do now. She huffed in satisfaction, tossing the envelope to the side. Her fingers reached into her hair, massaging her head. There were too many things to think about right now. Arcane squeezed her eyes shut as memories stung her eyes in the form of tears. 
~
“Please, don’t leave me.” Arcane had whispered, her small breaths filling the one room of the treehouse. 
“I don’t have a choice. You know I don’t want to go.” Kalon’s voice broke and he looked away so Arcane couldn’t see the tears in his eyes. It was silent. 
“We’ll still be best friends right?” 
“Yeah.” Kalon’s reply didn’t hold much conviction, causing Arcane to look over at him, confused, glossy eyes narrowing. 
“To the moon and back, Kal, remember?” She said, her tone desperate. It was a promise they made one night as they were watching some cheesy movie on the old television set. The boy had told the girl that he loved her too ‘the moon and back’. Kalon had then explained that the two characters said that so that they would never be apart. They could meet at the same moon, always and then they could go back. And then, they would never be fully apart. Arcane had liked that. So naturally,  she had grabbed Kal’s face and made him promise that they would go ‘to the moon and back’ if they were ever apart. It became a goodbye for them, a way of saying ‘I’ll see you soon’. 
“Yeah,” Kal had replied, a smile barely curling through his lips, “I’ll race ya there.”
~
She wasn’t sure how long she lay there, letting her memories flow down her cheeks and into the bedsheets, but eventually she had to get up. She pulled herself up and off the bed, limbs protesting at the use. She just needed a few days is all, then she wouldn’t even remember what she was crying for.  Kalon didn’t mean anything to her anymore.
thank you for reading this far, i love all of you. just throw out ideas please. or give me some advice, i would love that. whether its about my writing or the plot i would love to have tips and constructive criticism on how to get better! tagging some moots who i hope dont hate me after this below the cut:
@natashxromanovf @pad-foots @griffxnnage @voidmalfoy @flxss-bxbblxs @alwaysreading @herondalesunsetcurve THANKS YALL I LOVE YOU MORE THEN I EXPRESS AND I DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT DESERVE ALL OF YOU AND YOUR LOVE
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raevenlywrites · 4 years ago
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Ties That Bind 22 of ???
Of course the first person I encountered upon waking was Adelina.
Rei was long gone from the tent, if the chill of the bedroll was any indication. I’d expected to find him just outside the tent flap. Instead I was met by the long, lean body of Zane’s primary guard.
And lover.
My cheeks immediately flamed in spite of myself, knowing what she must think. My mouth worked uselessly as my mind offered no words to explain. I couldn’t exactly claim it wasn’t what it looked like, though Rei and I certainly hadn’t spent our time together in the way I knew a serpiente would assume.
But surprise followed surprise, as Adelina ushered me back into the tent with a conspiratorial air.
“We don’t have much time,” she whispered, nearly knocking me over in her rush to get us back under cover. “Our men will only keep each other busy for so long.”
“I-- what?”
I couldn’t begin to parse it. Adelina didn’t seem to mind my clueless state. She rushed on, eager to say her piece.
“I need to know how we’re meant to play this. Is Zane to be your lover or not?”
I could only blink.
“I know how the serpiente would read this, but I just want to be sure. You’ve taken his hand before you mother, you danced with him last night before the crowd. But when its just us, you’ve made no overtures. So I just want to know what role I—I mean he—is meant to play before you people. Are you two seriously planning to join our kingdoms?”
I stumbled to a seat, sitting before my wobbling legs made the choice for me. Did they really think--
“Danica, please. We don’t have much time.”
I felt like I was missing something, great swaths of something. I suddenly wished I’d stayed behind to walk and talk with them more as the serpiente had made their way here.
“I… honestly have no idea.”
It was the best I could give her. I felt this woman deserved the truth, but Zane and I hadn’t really discussed it. Mostly because I hadn’t thought either of us had taken the suggestion seriously. But looking back on all our conversations--
“What do you mean you have no idea?” Adelina snapped, but even without a serpent’s ability to read emotions I knew she wasn’t cross with me. The tense, pent up energy that so often drove me to pace was obvious in her posture, her tone, her entire being. I realized suddenly that if the serpiente could sense emotion anyways, there was no reason not to wear their hearts out on their sleeves. Or lack thereof, as was often the case.
I was getting side tracked. My mind was working furiously, but not in any useful direction. Adelina, like a dog among sheep, was not having it.
“Sweet Anhamirak, Danica are you listening to me? How will we be presenting Zane to your people?”
“I had wondered that myself.”
Adelina’s head whipped around as the man himself pulled back the flap of the tent. Rei scowled just over Zane’s shoulder. But amazingly, he didn’t pull the serpiente away from me to make sure I was unharmed. Adelina, at least, it seemed he trusted.
“Shall we have this conversation out in the open?”
The question was ostensibly for me, but his eyes remained locked with Adelina’s.
“You were never going to ask--” she began, tone pleading.
“I was biding my time,” her prince asserted. “Neither I nor Danica appreciate being rushed.”
“We’re at the bleeding gate!” she countered. “If not now, then when?”
“If we could maybe refrain from shouting?” Rei suggested. “And maybe come out of the tent? We’re making a scene.”
Zane nodded and backed up, holding the tent flap with a magnanimous sweep of his arm.
“Ladies.”
The last thing I wanted to do was face a mixed assemblage of curious serpiente and avians, but I didn’t think hiding in the bedroll with a blanket over my head was an option. I let Adelina help me to my feet, drawing the coolness of her hand into my demeanor. I hoped that maybe, some small of my reserve went to her as well. The shaken woman looked like she needed it.
The sun was well and truly risen, slanting sharply through the trees. It was mid, maybe late morning, but any sleepiness I might have felt was burned away by the singing of my nerves. Time to face the day.
Adelina, to my surprise, stayed on my far side, keeping myself between her and Zane. Rei fell into step on Zane’s other side, the four of us making the short walk to the main central fire and the breakfasts cooking there. Food suddenly sounded wonderful, and not just because it would present further delay. That was simply an added bonus.
Zane handed me down onto a log with as much grace and decorum as he would if it were a dining room chair. The absurdity of it made me smile, which I realized was the goal when he rewarded me with one of his own. I was learning to tell the difference between his pleasantly bland, haughtily mocking, and genuinely pleased smiled. I hoped I got to see the latter one more. It looked good on him, turning an inhumanly beautiful sculpture into something warm and soft and touchable.
And just like that I was blushing again, with merely the hint of thoughts of intimacy.
Zane laughed. It wasn’t a nice sound.
“And here I thought I was being on my best behavior. Courtly manners too forward for you, pretty Danica? You didn’t seem to mind my hands on yours last night.”
I scowled at the abrupt shift in his tone, the venomous suggestion I knew was meant to wound. Was he really mad at me for showing genuine emotion? Well, too bad. He was about to get even more.
“That’s petty, Zane. Don’t threaten my reputation just because you’re unhappy with something.”
Zane blinked, and Adelina laughed. She reached down and squeezed my shoulder, startling me, Zane, and Rei all. That only made her laugh harder.
“Well done, Dani. You’ll handle him just fine.”
“That’s Shardae, to you,” Rei bristled.
Zane opened his mouth, and whatever was going to come out of it was not going to be good. I gave a sharp pierce of a whistle, not thinking, just determined to cut this off before it got any worse.
“Alright! That’s enough.”
Adelina removed her hand, which I was surprised to find I missed, but it was time for me to take the reins while I could. I could invite her to be more informal with me later, if there was a later.
“Adelina brought up a valid point with me Zane; we need to sort out what kind of impression we intend to make.”
For a moment, Zane looked pained, almost like he would plead with me. But he straightened, put his feelings aside, and just like that, I was talking with the Arami of the serpiente, the man who would be king. Like Adelina’s hand, I missed seeing the genuine him, but appreciated his cooperation.
One ego down—and another immediately took its place. Rei fidgeted beside me, and without even making a sound, he was throwing just as much a fit as Zane had. I could ignore him—I should ignore him—but I’d had enough.
“Yes, Andreios?”
“Nothing, Shardae.”
“No, no. Speak your piece. You obviously disapprove of something.”
I watched him pull away from me, drawing his emotions deep inside--only to come rushing back in an even larger wave.
“I do. As your alastair, I take offense to serpents barging into your tent, and taking liberties with your person.”
My mouth dropped open, eyes as wide as the moon. I absolutely could not believe my ears. This was not my Rei. It was so utterly unlike him to be speaking of such personal things in front of company. Had one single evening of kissing really changed him so?
I was suddenly more glad than ever that I’d not let my mother bully me into an announcement last night. I had some reevaluating to do.
“The man I name as my alastair will have to be comfortable with the serpiente way of doing things. I don’t need a hoverhawk. I need a partner, who understands me.”
It pained me to have to speak so bluntly with others listening. I’d have much rather had this discussion in private—or better yet, not at all. This was not my Rei. Unfortunately, I did not have time to deal with him now. And if he really intended to be my alastair, he needed to understand that my people and this peace would have to come first.
Rei’s face went stony, then empty. This time, it was no retreating tide. It was a frozen glacier, his hurt feelings behind a wall of ice for good.
“Of course, Shardae. I don’t approve of it as a guard, either. But Adelina is hand picked by the Arami, and its not my place to question her.”
Just as my words were meant to subtly remind him that he was not yet my mate, his were intended to throw Zane and Adelina’s relationship in my face. It steeled me against pity I might have been feeling before. I had neither time nor patience for this.
“Quite right, Captain.”
I turned my back on him, and my own hurt, and gave all my attention to Zane.
“Please pardon our rudeness, Arami. Now, let’s discuss introducing you to my people.”
The Ties That Bind Tag list: @thehellinsideyourhead @therecouldbecolorsandlove @adventuresofacreesty @writing-with-melon @rainydaydarling @faithfire
Raev’s Gen Tag List (should I tag you guys in this? It IS a thing I wrote. I’m gonna say yes unless you guys are like “no of course not we’re sick of hearing about your stupid fic for a twenty year old book XD)
No one has complained yet so yall gonna keep getting tagged :P
List is currently: @lordkingsmith @writinglyra @drbibliophile @mperialscribe @adie-dee @lexiklecksi @theramwrites @writinginslowmotion @raenawrites @apollon-arium @anika-writes @faithfire @thehellinsideyourhead @adventuresofacreesty
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piraticalarchive · 3 years ago
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okay so for everyone who hates big corporations and management who takes advantage of their employees.. this one’s for you. it’s long but .... i find it completely hilarious.
so a brief recap: amy got fired back in march from a huge international retailer, yes? when things first started like they were going south, i worked on really re establishing a relationship with my brother who is like one level below C-suite (cfo, ceo, etc etc) of that same company because i had an idea in mind. March rolls around, amy gets fired .. and I’m like .. okay. time to put this in motion. but stress and depression obviously took the motivation away from me, but i continued to keep that line of communication up with my brother. we started talking weekly, sometimes twice a week via an actual call. well, i’m finally feeling better .. so this week i finally put my plan in motion. here’s how it went
stage 1: i sent a text to my brother asking if i applied to the store in my area if i could use him as a reference. he said, of course but every store is hiring so i’d look at any store besides that one. (which is already fucking hilarious but i digress) ... so i call the store and one of the managers who sat in on amy’s firing answers when i ask to speak to someone involved in hiring (oh lucky day). I start off with “hi! I’m sorry to bother you, but I’ve been looking for a job thats a bit of a change of scenery and my brother is the *insert position name* and works in *insert headquarters location* and he recommended i give the company a try despite that I had a less than stellar experience last time”. And this manager FALLS OVER telling me they are hiring for so many positions blah blah blah and then at the end when i’m like “thanks for the information! I’m definitely going to apply!” she’s like “of course! I’ll give our hiring manager your information so she can pull it immediately. Whats your name?” and i give my name and suddenly its just dead fucking silent... because they know who I am and they know that I’m in a relationship with amy and that i know what they did. But she recovers and is like ‘can’t wait to see your application!’ .. so.. okay. stage 1 was a success. but then, enter...
unexpected event: the store manager himself calls me. Starts off with some small talk, finally gets around to saying ‘so I hear you’d like to come back and work for us? I was looking at your previous application and I didn’t see any mention of the relation you talked about when you called”. And I’m like “oh, yeah... I don’t like using stuff like that because I’d prefer to get in on my own merit  and skills and not by a family member’s position. Plus its like that show undercover boss, you know? I get to see what the place is like before they know. BUT given with what happened to amy, I was unsure if I’d even be considered without a reference like that” and he laughs nervously and is like “i totally get it. So did anyone know that you had a brother in that position?” and I’m like “oh i mentioned it once in passing to [amy’s manger] but I just said my brother was in corporate and there are a lot of levels so i think he just left it at that” and the store manager is like ‘haha yeah different levels but thats like ... its own level...” and we talk a little bit and he’s like “what made you want to come back?” and I’m like “like i mentioned before, the amy thing really threw me off. I was angry and the good thing about siblings is you don’t have to sugarcoat stuff. So I went to my brother and was like this is how you treat people?? are you kidding?? what about job security?? and i sent him the picture amy had snapped of her discharge papers where it listed the reason and he told me that, and everything else I yelled at him about,  wasn’t the company’s way and that the store had seriously violated something. So for one, I now know that isn’t actually something that should have happened and  two, i inadvertently brought this store to corporate’s attention and there are a lot of good people who work here, and they don’t deserve the consequences of that, so I want to help make it right” and he’s fucking sweating yall, I can hear it over the phone. and he’s like “fill out your application and put whatever you want down and we’ll call you and talk about positions and we can find a way to give you what you want” and I’m like “oh, don’t tell me that nick because your chair is looking awfully good right now” and he did a nervous laugh. SO, unexpected event made my plan even better. Then we get to:
Stage 2: I apply. I check literally every management position, including the one they fired amy from and also some hourly positions and put down ridiculous hours. I pass the manager test with flying colors and when it asks why i said i want to be a team trainer i wrote down ‘thanks to knowing the home office, i know how things should work and I want to help this store raise its position in the district and I know what policies aren’t being followed to help make that raise smoother.” I submitted the application, called the first manager I had spoken to and told her I had done so and she was like “I’m sure we’ll give you a call tomorrow!” ‘Tomorrow’ came and by 7 that night, they hadn’t contacted me. So I went to the ‘we’re hiring’ image they had posted on their facebook page like an hour previously and tagged my brother and was like ‘dude this is one of the positions at my store i was telling you about. think i could pull it off?” AND BAM ! they sent me a request for a phone interview at 8am the next morning. I scheduled my interview for later that afternoon at 2:45 and we enter Stage 3.
Stage 3: Amy and I go to the store to pick up a few things. It’s suddenly fucking spotless. There are no gaps in the shelves, the floor has been cleaned since the last time we were there (monday night and i called them tuesday and it is now white and shiny as hell) and they have the lights turned up all the way so you can actually see. EVERY FUCKING AISLE is perfect. Cat food? perfect. Funko pops? stacked and lined up perfectly. Video games? Filled. Clearance aisle? Perfect order. Like its super obvious they did a mad dash and tried to get the store in shape. So amy and I walk down every single aisle and point things out and kind of put our heads together and talk and I take out my phone and act like i’m texting etc .. basically we’re just fucking with people’s heads because the managers are nearby and they can see what we’re doing. 
Stage 4: So later we’re home and 2:45 comes and goes with NO word. No phone call, no email, no hey can we reschedule. they FORGOT about the interview. I’m dying because they’re making it even better and even easier to fuck with them. So I text my brother (who KNOWS my mental health has been in the trash) and I’m like “I filled out an application just to see and they set up an interview and blew me off. You were right .. not a great help when it comes to the blues” and he was like “yep...i’d look at literally any other store” and talked to me a bit more about it. He was irritated that they’d do that and kept saying they were on thin ice.  Finally at 5 they text me and they’re like “hey, this is the [insert store] and we’re sorry we missed your interview. I wanna apologize. Can we reschedule?” And I wait like an hour and a half (i was napping, i’ll admit it) but I respond with “I apologize for the late response, I had a prior commitment I had to take care of. Unfortunately, I reached out to someone [they know who it is. they know]  in the off chance I had misunderstood the process since I hadn’t heard from you guys and I was encouraged to pursue opportunities at other branches in the area. Thank you for the original consideration and I hope you have a great day!” and they waited until 11am the next day to reply back which I’m assuming is because they were waiting for the higher up management to return to the store.
Come to find out the managers are still basically pissing themselves and freaking out because not only did they a) fire someone against company policy and now know the people at the top know and b) drop the ball and forget to interview a family member of said people at the top ... I got to add salt in the wound one more time by mentioning that my brother dropped in a lot (he doesn’t) and that I’d love to show off the store since it’s such a huge part of the community and it was looking better than I’d ever seen it look. And that it would be nice because he’d get the real experience since it wasn’t a formal, announced visit .... but, of course, that he’s salary .. so the policy is that he’s always ‘at work’ and obligated to take note of things.
so basically, i feel justified. Six and a half months of careful planning and maneuvering was totally justified. 10/10, I’d do it again. Let this be a lesson that patience in planning vengeance is completely worth having and I hope I helped make the store better for employees who aren’t management by putting the fear of god into them with the idea that my brother or anyone else from his office can just drop the fuck in whenever they want with a totally casual visit that could still fuck the management over completely. This is a good week, mates .. a very good week. Am I petty? yes. Do i hate their guts and feel like it was an entertainment that was totally worth it given what they did to the love of my life? also yes.
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wienerbarnes · 4 years ago
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Pairing: Bucky x Reader (Cheek to Cheek)
Word Count: 2,622
Warnings: murder lol, mentions of gore/blood, mentions of rape (its described in like two sentences and theres a short non-graphic flashback, but pls pls pls message me if you dont wanna read and ill give u a sparknotes version), so theres angst but also some nice parts like bucky meditating okay
A/N: wrote this while procrastinating my art commissions but i bought my first laptop BY MYSELF after saving for months and im v excited :) lmk what yall think of this, i promise next part will be goofier/happier lol
MAIN MASTERLIST | CHEEK TO CHEEK MASTERLIST
“Shit… Fuck… Fuck! He’s gonna fucking kill me… fuck…”
The mumbles spill from your lips as you take in the scene in front of you. Puddles and puddles of blood covered the floor of your apartment, dirtying your beige tile and all the other surfaces with splatters. David lays in the middle, with about thirty-six stab wounds in his body.
When you and Bucky started the arrangement regarding your list, there were two rules you two agreed to follow - no matter what. First rule: Kills are never completed alone. You two are to complete the list together and help each other with everything that involves the person. Second rule: Bucky is to know everything about the person they’re killing. What they did to you, their name, their remaining family, where they live, what they eat for breakfast; everything. 
And here you were breaking both of those rules.
It was too good of an opportunity, you try and convince yourself. Bucky will understand, he’s always so understanding, he never yells, he’s always so nice to you; a choked sob escaped your body as your dirty hands fly to cover your face, tears flowing down your cheeks mixing with the blood now smeared across your skin.
TWO HOURS EARLIER
Bucky always told you to be extremely cautious when leaving the apartment. Even though it had been well over a year, almost two, since your prison escape, you never knew who could be watching. Every few weeks or so, your name pops up in the news, Whatever happened to one of the worst killers in modern history, How did she pull off such an escape from such a high security facility, Is she even still alive, etc.
But as soon as your name appears, it vanishes once more, replaced by some other injustice happening in the world.
Your feet take you inside a small bar, the musky scent intrigues you along with the copious amounts of peanut shells littering the floor. You take a seat on the stool and try not to pay attention to the fact that every single person in the room is staring at you right now. But you can’t blame them; you’ve dyed your hair a pastel pink now, body covered in baggy jeans and baby blue long-sleeved milkmaid top, a gift from Bucky. “You can’t wear that one t-shirt, that’s mine, by the way, forever.” He’d told you. Your rainbow painted toes and fingernails stand out under the dimmed lights of the place.
An older man behind the bar approaches you and places a napkin in front of you, “What can I get ya’?” You order some beer plastered on the wall because as far as you know, you’ve never even tried alcohol before, let alone know enough about it to have any kind of preference.
You take sips of the beer for a while, aimlessly watching the sports game playing on the TV, every once in a while glancing at the pool table where a group of older men play a game together. Suddenly, the stool beside you becomes occupied. You know it’s not Bucky, he doesn’t know you’re here and it’s not his cologne, but for a second you were hoping it was. A parallel to when you sat with him in that cafe all that time ago. When he bought you that apple pie and hot chocolate. I miss him…
You refuse to look over at the man sitting next to you, but you can feel his eyes blatantly staring at you. 
“So… what’s your name?” He breaks the silence and asks you. You don’t respond, simply just continue sipping away at your beer.
“My name is David.” He offers. A chill runs up your spine at the name and you look over at him. He looks so familiar… Where do I know him from? Have I seen him at the food market before? Is he Hydra? Did we go to school together? Were we in the Marines-
“Hey officer,” A deep voice curls into your ear, causing a chill to run up your spine.
“Fuck off, David. I’m trying to do my hair.” You don’t bother glancing at him in the mirror as you scoop more gel into your hands and smooth it onto the top of your head. You’ve let your hair grow to long and the strands keep sticking out of the bun, but the thought of asking any of the other women, or worse - the men, for help cutting it terrifies you. You’re still too new.
“Now, is that any way to talk to your higher up?” A large hand wraps around your middle and gropes your breast.
“I said fuck off.” A pointy elbow slams back into his chest, knocking the wind out of him.
“I’ll get you for that, just you wait. Fresh meat.”
Your body runs cold as you make the connection and you feel as though your entire body has shut down. You can feel the cold sweat gathering in your palms and your lower back. A lump forms in your throat and you want to cry; you want to scream. But something takes over, and although you feel terrified, you keep yourself composed; hide your anxiety.
“Do you want to get out of here? My place is only a few blocks away.” You ask, false sultriness dripping from your voice. David smirks at you, clearly not recognizing you from nearly a decade ago. 
He takes out some cash and places it on the bar, grabbing your beer from your hands and placing it on top, grabbing your hands after and leading you out of the bar.
Bucky sits on the floor of his living room, practicing his twenty minutes of meditation before bed. Alpine rubs her cheek against the bare top of his foot that’s crossed under his knee, but eventually gets bored before trotting around behind him to start climbing her way up his back. Bucky tries his best to ignore her tiny nails digging through his shirt, but can’t help but chuckle as she makes herself comfortable in the curve of his neck. “Guess meditation time is over, huh baby?” He whispers before gathering her in his hands and plopping her on his bed. He reaches down to roll up his yoga mat when he hears a silent buzzing from his kitchen.
Confused on who would be calling him this late, knowing that Sharon’s visiting a college friend over in SoHo and Sam’s on a date, he sees a number he doesn’t recognize flash on the screen. Bucky hesitates answering, but he knows telemarketers rarely call this late.
“Hello?” Bucky answers.
“B-Bucky?” Your shaky voice sounds on the other end. The sound is watery and raspy, like you've been sobbing your eyes out and screaming for hours.
“Bucky, I-I-I need y-your help… I fucked up,” Your voice is cut off by a hiccup as Bucky goes to grab his closest pair of pants to go over his boxers and he pulls on sneakers before grabbing the keys to his bike.
“Hey, sweetheart? Do me a favor and relax, okay? Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Bucky rushes out as he locks his door behind him before making his way to the staircase.
“I’m so so so sorry, Bucky… please don’t be mad at me-e… I broke t-the rules,” Choked sobs escape you and Bucky has never heard you cry like that before.
“Listen, I’m already on my way, okay? I’ll be at yours in twenty minutes, okay?” You don’t respond as Bucky listens to your crying and you eventually hang up.
Broke the rules? What does she mean by… oh. She couldn’t have… we had our next hit planned for a few days from now. Did she do someone else on the list? Bucky tries not to think too much about it until he can get to yours and figure out what’s going on, his motorcycle screaming through the quiet night.
You’ve been sitting in David’s blood for about an hour now. The liquid is cold, his body is cold, the phone in your hand is cold. Nice going, you’ve really done it now. Not only have you probably just cost yourself your freedom, but you’ve ruined your jeans and the top Bucky bought you. He’s going to be so mad at you; he’s going to be so mad that he’s going to have no choice but to bring you in. He’ll be laughing as the cops drag you away-
Your thoughts are interrupted by a frantic knock on your door, Bucky’s voice calling your name on the other side.
“If you don’t open the door, I’m breaking it down!” He calls. 
You slowly stand, trying not to slip in the puddle, before walking over to the door and opening it about halfway. Bucky’s eyes widen and his brows furrowed together as he looks your body up and down.
The blood on your clothes is starting to brown and you’re covered up to your forearms in blood. Splatters decorate your face, neck and hair, and your eyes are puffy from crying.
“I-I-” You begin to stutter. Bucky silently pushes his way inside to see the bloodbath waiting for him. He pushes the door closed behind him and stares at the body laying in the middle of the floor. Your knife still sits standing out of his face.
“Who the fuck is that?”
“Bu-Bucky- I can,”
“What, you-you can explain?!” Bucky snaps, turning to face you, and you’ve never seen him look at you like this. You flinch and take a half-step backwards, bumping into the door behind you.
Bucky turns back around, a flesh and silver hand running through his hair and roughly over his face.
“Here’s what’s going to happen,” He begins, voice eerily even, still staring at the body. “You're going to go shower and wash all of the blood off your body. Then you’re going to make sure this apartment is spotless. I’ll take care of… him. And then we’ll talk when I get back. Are we understood?”
You can’t seem to make any words come out so you quickly make your way to your bathroom and close the door behind you softly.
You shower until the water runs cold and your skin is tinted red. Either from the blood or how hard you were scrubbing, you’re not sure, you just didn’t want Bucky to still be in your apartment when you stepped out.
It’s not that you were scared of him, because you weren’t. You knew that Bucky would never intentionally harm you, both physically or mentally. You were more angry at yourself. Bucky's done nothing but protect you; he’s kept you a secret, helped you indirectly work through your trauma, stitched you up, made you smile and laugh when you didn’t even think that was ever going to be possible for you anymore. You broke the only rules he asked of you. You disappointed him. You’ve put him in an even worse position than he’s already in by protecting your existence.
You turn the knob of the water to the right before stepping out and wrapping your fluffy yellow robe around your body, tying it at the waist. Your apartment is empty when you step out of the bathroom, Bucky nor David occupying the space. Your walk over to your sink and open the cabinet on the bottom to take out your cleaning supplies before getting to work.
Bucky’s calmed down significantly by the time he gets back to your apartment. He checks his phone to see that it’s almost five in the morning before reaching in his other pocket for your keys that he took off the table, slipping the key into the lock and jiggling it until pushing the door open. 
He’s not mad at you. Perhaps he was for a bit, but he realized that anger was just fear. Had anyone seen you? Did this guy do something to you? Did he recognize you and that’s why you needed to kill him? Did you kill him because you actually wanted to experience that again? He really hoped it wasn’t the last one.
You're sitting on your bed in the corner of the apartment, splatters still visible on the sheets but the floors are clean. The room doesn’t have an overpowering smell of bleach or cleaner, but there is no trace of a body here, besides the small splatters, but those can be passed off as splashes of wine. You did good.
Your feet are stretched out in front of your as your hands are planted behind your back, propping you up. Your yellow robe is tied around your waist but the edges sit high up on your thighs.
He sets your keys on your table, kicks off his shoes, and walks over to take a seat next to you.
“Did you know I was a Marine before all of this? When I was, like, eighteen?” You break the silence, still staring at the wall in front of you.
“Yes.” 
“The guy was my unit chief. He raped me twice during my first week there.” 
Bucky remains quiet as you explain, watching your face and it’s calm expression. You hesitate, opening and closing your mouth before opening it once more to continue.
“I went to some bar tonight and he hit on me. He didn’t recognize me, and… I don’t know. I thought I’d scare him or something, remind him what he’d done. But then he was here and he kept trying to feel me up even though I’d push him away. I didn’t have a plan yet. And then he snapped at me and then I snapped back…” You trailed off. 
“After I realized what happened, I panicked and I used his phone to call you.”
“I’m really sorry, Bucky.” You say, softer now. You bring your legs up to your chest, wrapping your arms around your shins.
“Okay. I forgive you.” Bucky responds after a moment.
The two of you sit in silence next to each other on the thin sheets. You’re staring at the passing cars out the window. He’s staring at your plant that’s sitting on the small night stand next to your mattress. You’ve changed out the silver tin it was sitting in to a light blue one covered in green polka dots. 
You tilt your head to meet his eyes and look away briefly before meeting them again.
“Can… Can I have a hug, Bucky?” You ask, with the smallest voice in the world, your sentence ending in a small crack.
Bucky doesn’t answer and instead scoots closer to you, wrapping his arms around your body and pulling you onto his lap, your thighs on either side of him, chests touching. His left arm wraps around your back and drags slowly up and down while his right hand rests on the back of your head, softly scratching through your still damp hair. Your hands are tucked close between both your chests and your breath fans softly against his neck where your head is tucked into. He silently breathes in your scent, the children’s strawberry soap you use mixed with a homey, warm small that’s just you. He watches out the window as the sky turns from a dark blue to a deep orange; it should be about five-thirty right about now and the morning traffic is about to start.
“There’s a ton of white cat hair on your shoulder, Buck.” He hears you whisper against him, voice slurring a bit with drowsiness, the last bits of adrenaline wearing off.
He smiles to himself and holds you until you're fast asleep, and then stays for a while after that, too.
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desolationlovers · 4 years ago
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x posting resumed
ill start with some basic plot explaination because i dont expect anybody to read a 30 year old reasonably hard to find manga
ok SO disclaimer i have a really hard time summarizing because i think everything is important so thisll be long. mentions of gore muder and death. and so much edge
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kamui shiro (main character) is a teenager returning to tokyo after moving away six years before. his childhood friends kotori and fuuma (brother and sister) notice that hes become very hotheaded and abrassive where he was very quiet and shy as a kid.
kamui is being observered magically by two different groups, the dragons of heaven and the dragons of earth. both groups wonder how this kid could be The “Kamui”, the one whose destiny it is to decide the fate of humanity.
the dragons of heaven, also known as the “seven seals”, believe that humanity should continue to live on earth, even if it causes the eventual death of the earth. the dragons of earth, also known as the “seven angels”, want to get rid of all human life so that the earth can begin to heal and continue on. every member of both sides of this fight had their positions preordained. every move they make is destined to happen, foretold by dreamgazers. the dreamgazers are people with the ability to travel through the world of dreams, able to see the future as well as the past and are able to create their own dreamscapes. they can also bring other people into their dreams. the main dreamgazer, a woman named hinoto is on the side of the dragons of heaven and is gathering them all to ready for the Final Battle for the Fate of the Earth.
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this is hinoto
kamui doesnt know a whole lot about his destiny other than he is involved in the final battle. the reason he and his mother left tokyo was because. brace yourself for this one also tw gore. kotori and fuumas mother was the one that “gave birth” to one of the sacred swords needed in the final battle. when she gives birth to this sword she straight up exploded. you know how in old ps2 games enemies would explode in a pile of meat. that. so kamui and his mom leave and she explains his part in the end of the world. kamui is the only one in this whole ordeal who gets to choose which side he wants to be on. no one really knows all the details about the future because parts of it only get locked in place when kamui makes his choice. cut to six years later kamui comes home from school and his house is on fire and his mom is inside. mom, unfazed by being actually on fire, tells kamui that the time has come to return to tokyo and fufill his destiny and then dies because she was on fire. kamui is not yet used to seeing people die horrifically in front of him so is devistated, but eventually makes his way to tokyo.
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kamui doesnt actually seem to have put a lot of though into this whole destiny thing. his plan is to go retrieve the scared sword and leave because he specifically doesnt want kotori and fuuma involved because he knows it insanely dangerous and besides his mom theyre the only people he really cares about. so he adopts this whole evil asshole attitude so that they dont want anything to do with him. which doesnt really work lol.
after being an asshole to his friends at school, kamui runs into hinotos knight (basically) and picks a fight with him because hes sick of being spied on.
side note everyone involved with the final battle has. magic basically? everyone has a special thing they can do but everyone has the ability to naruto run on buildings and jump mega high and the like. anime shit. kamui has something similar to telekensis and can create energy blasts.
anyway theyre fighting and kamui shows no care to the destruction hes creating. the fight ends in a draw when another dragon of heaven shows up and pulls the knight out because theyre both severely injured. kamui ends up collapsing from his wounds and just so happens to be found by fuuma and taken to fuumas home (which is also a shrine) and calls a doctor. as kamui is passed out hinoto visits him in a dream and tells him to join the seven seals and shows him visions she has had about what could happen if he doesnt. one of the visions shows that kotori will be killed and hinoto says that he might be able to save her.
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yet ANOTHER seal followed fuuma and kamui and gives out a another loredump the second he and kamui are alone. while this is happening the shrine is attacked by one of the seven angels that has come to steal the the scared sword. the angel kills fuumas father and escapes with the sword.
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(sword feat. the dad)
hinoto has a dream that shows her that there are actually TWO “Kamuis” that will be on each side of the battle. whatever choice original kamui makes, the other will go to the other side.
kamui goes to finally meet hinoto in person and basically has the same convo as the dream but the dreamgazer of the seven angels shows up in this dream and tells him his other option to join the angels. kamui is mega pissed hinoto wouldnt tell him the whole truth. he storms out yelling about how he doesnt care about any of this.
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after leaving kamui runs into kotori and they talk about how things were when they were kids and are immediately attacked by another of the seven angels. kamui is trying to protect kotori who has no fuckin clue whats goin on. fuuma shows up out of nowhere and gets them out of there. kamui tells fuuma that he just wants him and kotori to be safe.fuuma reveals that his father said somehing to him before he died and hes been having dreams about it before seeming to go completely blank faced and says that he and kamuis fates are intertwined but snaps out of it.
kamuis aunt, who has shown up like once and was vauge for a bit, appears and tells kamui and fuuma that shes about to give birth to the other scared sword. then she also explodes. her spirit tells them theres a secret vault where they need to take the sword to and keep there until the promised day.
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kotori was getting drinks or something and walks into the massacare and loses her mind. she had seen her mother die the same way so she full on dissociates and is near catatonic.
fuuma on the other hand, goes back into that blank face trance and says that he is the second kamui. and snaps out of it again. sceret agents show up to take kamui to the vault. they bring along fuuma and kotori.
kamui does an assload of monolouging and reflection after they arrive at the vault. kamui tells fuuma that his only wish is for he and kotori to be safe and happy. fuuma once again switches to his other self and says “youve finally come to a decision i see” and grabs the sword and kotori. kamui gives chase.
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fuuma destroys part of the building and holds kotori in place with wires on a massive cross (symbolism. subtlety who). fuuma stabs glass shards into kamui to pin him against a wall before ultimately killing kotori with the sword, as was foreseen by hinoto as well as kotori herself. fuuma bounces to join up with the dragons of earth while kamui breaks down over kotoris body.
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side note if i had a nickle for everytime a near catatonic tramatized person carried around a decapitated head in this id have two nickles which isnt much but its weird it happened twice
congrats thats the first 8 volumes of x1999 with all of the side characters cut out.
i wrote all the way to 8 because kotoris death is basically the end of act 1 and is what gets the ball actually rolling. and since i want to talk about kamui as a character i had to get atleast that far. thats gonna be another post tho this is way too long its lagging my notes app. also tumblr only allows ten images. rip. no triangle shoulders for yall.
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Anonymous said: 
What are some blogs that you consider part of your rp family?
> Aww anon this is a really cool question. Well I have a particular group of people that are pretty much my always follow. I know people do those follower forever but I haven’t done any before. I get overwhelmed as it is with the amount of people who follow me but some blogs that I will never not be following are: 
@coffee-and-guns​ @theyearningtofly​ Uh hello. Have you seen the babes Lotus and Asuka? Feli has some dolls right here and I stan them to death. They don’t get the interaction or attention they deserve and I will fight until they do. Lotus is 60′s pre-tumblr babe. I’m talking OTP from the onset. He literally will destroy the city of Detroit for her. He will go to hell and back for her. It’s amazing how much this ship has taken over my life but our crazy amount of verses and aus is very telling. We have a ton of plot. Lotixty reigns supreme. And Asuka is my Connor’s waifu as well as Callum’s wife. Best babe.  @diivinerose​ Daniela is not just one beautiful muse. She is so diverse in her three verses that she is pretty much a multi. Curly is my chaos doll but also a shy bean with such great ideas. Our aus are another wild treasure trove. Each verse has something favorite in it. Each rendition I love and DD60 considers Main D his true love. Mad D is the other half of the toxicity known as Corla with my boy Corvus. The ship of Main D and Connor was a surprise in the beginning. I didn’t expect it but I’m glad it happened. Cause I just love her clinical coolness against this supposed cool machine who has more emotion than he should now as a deviant. Best Babe.  @stayhuman-genevieve​ @leaderawakened​ @pathdiverted​ Gen is amazing. Markus is tops. 52 is a babe. OK but also Amanda, Louis, Anarchy the list goes on. All of these muses are amazing and it’s just such a privilege to write with such a wonderfully developed original in Genevieve. She is 60′s weak spot. The ruthless one gave up Cyberlife for Gen. That takes some doing. But they have a ton of shit they went through including a terrorist takeover by that aforementioned Anarchy. We have such great plot ideas and I can’t get enough of them. Main Connor and Markus for my gal too. Main Markus all around. I love him damn it. Genevieve is also my Connor’s waifu. DD60 on the other hand.... just don’t let him alone with Corrupted Gen. OTP status right here. Best Babe. 
@dcwnxism​ @soulxism​​ @lethalxarsenal​ @wintcrcoded​ @resentfuldrcgon​ OK but here the list goes on as well. All of these muses canon and original are just amazing. Iron is the queen of angst. Hands down the best at making me cry. One of these days I’m gonna get her back for all the pain. lol Not only is Nines (now known as Cassius) my canon RK900 but my 60′s exclusive 900 bro. That took some doing let me say. Aiden is 60′s soulmate. Sixden is a ship I never expected but it snuck up on me. I love him. I love Lexi so much. She needs more attention. The one Gavin my Connor will put up with.... as an enemy of course. Oh and WuXian? Caleb loves him already. They will shine bright. Best Babe. 
@creatorofclay​
Did somebody ask for the only Kamski of my life? Well look no further than Kam/Ash/Clay right here not only making me appreciate Elijah but turning me to liking him as a character. I didn’t think much of him when I played the game. But let me tell you waifu right here writes him with such humanity (even when he’s being an ass) that gives such a new perspective. 60 is still on that creator nonsense but it’s in the demon au where he gets to shine with his affection or rather verbal brawls effectively with Elijah. My exclusive Kamski. Don’t @ me. Best Babe. 
@rk800isalive​ @imabittercoffee​
Waifu spotted! My platonic soulmate right here. Eme is someone who gave me a wonderful springboard for Sixty to get his hate on with Connor. That hate took a turn I never expected early on. These two wound up getting over their altercation at the tower. They wound up becoming siblings. The only Connor that 60 considers a brother in his main verse. Let me say the work up for this was some good old work. We wrote so many things with them and still do. I adore their human au. Let’s not forget Sierra. I love this bitch. She’s such a contrast to Caleb but man I’m digging it. Also she is the unofficial goth wife of Corvus but you’ll never hear it from him. Or...will you? thinksmirk Best Babe.
@et-liliium​ @musesdivine​
My baby Cherry has wonderful original dolls and I still miss them. BUT I’m super excited to see Lily on her own blog and my babe slowly getting back into the fandom. Sixty is looking to corrupt that sweet flower but it’s Connor that is absolutely in awe of her. He is in love. Let’s not forget Lily being the good to Corvus’ bad. We got some good shit planned for them. She’s the android Suzanne pretty much ;) Seriously check out these wonderful female muses. They are amazing and deserve all the love in the world. Best Babe.
@robobiitch​
Let me throw some love on Moe right here. Yall wanna see full on enemies with Sixty? Look no further but man we have some good ass plot with assassin au with a little dose of angst. Lust already hates/loves his brother-in-law in the other demon verse. The shenanigans are bound for some good shit. A wonderful Connor and that’s the bottom line cause ruthless sixty said so. Literally such a fun and cool person. I love plotting and just hanging. Best Babe. 
@anderson-residence​
Have you seen these muses? I love every single one and Alley always has something in my inbox that either makes me laugh or worry. lol Sending YK to Corvus is probably not the best idea but I love it. I love chatting about aus, plots and everything in between. Each muse is one I enjoy seeing and I really want to interact more with all of them. Sixty just wants to push Hank’s buttons and probably wants to kill Connor but.... lol Best Babe.
@rxseguided​ @repliicantceo​
A literal bab right here. Jesse, Eli and Elliot are all originals that bring so much more to the plate. If you haven’t seen Jesse in action what are you doing? The evil bitch’s daughter herself? Well then sign me up. Cupcake is a doll and her muses are chef kiss. Got it? Good. Lust loves his angel mom but DD is also in love. ;) Elliot is legit one of Corvus’ official cronies. That’s an honor in the worst way possible. Gotta love that human sk verse with Corvesse. Best Babe.
@triptocained​ @syntheticisolation​
Let me tell you all a story about a fed drenched in heavy rain..... No this isn’t a pun. I swear but Norman is literally a highlight and I’m looking forward to that enemies shit with Sixty. Bringing Jayden into the DBH universe is the best damn thing to happen. Danny brings him to life perfectly. I haven’t seen anybody else do this much justice. Norman is yours alone and deserves all the attention. Also let’s not forget Richard. Look I love this knife happy bastard. 60 still wants to show off Monica but he can wait as long as it takes. Always a pleasure to see on my dash. I’m in love. Best Babe. 
@fearlessandchaotic​
Original babes need more love and Hana his no different. Ely has such development and constant shenanigans I love to see on my dash. It’s always wonderful to see but also Sixty is over the moon for Hana. He hates to admit it but the best thing was coming back to his fiery fox. These two have such chemistry with their ruthless selves they’d sit around and poke fun at people instead of working on a case. Seriously go give the female muses their due love damn it.  Best Babe. 
@vexeddetective​
Vex is a precious babe that I adore the hell out of. Sixvin is here fam. Sixty likes to push Gavin’s buttons. We all know how that shit goes down. I will legit protec this babe. Not Gavin tho. He can fight his own battles and most likely end up wrestling with Sixty. That might end up messy good. Also Lucifer.... whenever he pops up my gal Jade is just: well he’s tall and scary. She probably secretly has a soft spot for him. We’ll have to find out. Please go follow for these two muses. You know you want to bishes. Best Babe. 
@swat-cptn-allen​ @det-gavin-reed​
My canon Allen right here. There is no one else who puts this much love into this muse. Webby is a literal precious bean. Sixty loves and hates Joseph. DD is definitely sof for him. Let that sof boy show his dom ;) I love the way Allen is given more development and his own unique persona from the little we see in game. I never imagined liking this character that much but Webby certainly has made me a fan of him. Please go give my canon Allen some love! Best Babe. 
@ambitiouslyruthless​ @fragmented-personage​
Goov is a babe. I have followed them for a while now and Vius was always a unique bab to see on my dash. Sixty still wants to pounce on him. Results may vary into ruthless territory BUT let him love on this original muse. He deserves more attention and love. Let him be that bastard to Gavin. Such a unique portrayal of Gavin that is totally one of my faves to see. I’m excited for the werewolf/vamp thread. Also can’t wait to see what happens with them in their main verses. Best Babe. 
@thirum-stained​
Always a delight on my dash and one of the earliest people to give my blog here a chance. Luna is a doll who has so many amazing muses and not just in the DBH fandom. Vanessa is Sixty’s waifu. She snuck up on him by surprise. He never imagined to fall in love but he sure did here. I adore all of the muses you tackle. I want to interact more with all of them. They’re forever follows on my dash for a reason. Best Babe. 
@theveryfirst​
This is my one and only Chloe. My literal canon babe. No one else compares and Heather is an all around sweetheart with amazing ideas. The plotting is always something I look forward to as well as just being able to chat. One of the earliest to follow me and still going strong on that forever follow list. Sixty adores Chloe. He feels for her more than he’d ever realize. Until he does. Corvus is still waiting to gets his hands on this angelic android. Best Babe.
> There are so many of you who follow that are so talented. It’s near impossible to give love to you all but there are some new babes who just followed that I’m looking forward to writing with. <3
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incorrect-hs-quotes · 5 years ago
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oohohoho you just opened the deepest can of worms on the planet
-mod dave, who wrote a fucking ten mile essay
first off, addressing the second anon, no theyre all humans. h., half humans at least. cause yall know me i fucking love my humanstuck aus off my ASS
(that would be funny as hell though. a troll from space walking into a camp on earth going “I AM THE SON OF ONE OF YOUR EARTH GODS. BITCH” like... holy shit)
so first things first their parents. im gonna lay this out, the beta kids and trolls are all greek (EXCEPT sollux hes roman cause his parent has no greek equivalent), and all the alpha kids and trolls are those gods roman equivalents (,,EXCEPT dirk cause he kinda balances sollux being roman out). i havent figured out how thatd happen like 16+ times yet cause in the percy jackson books theres only ever been one instance of two siblings of the same godly descent being greek and roman respectively in HISTORY so like.. i guess th. i guess thats just not a problem in this au
anyway this gets really long so im gonna talk about the beta kids and trolls cause i havent elaborated on the alphas at all ((peep the tags if you wanna see their parents though))
johns the son of zeus, rose is the daughter of athena, dave is the son of apollo, and jade is the daughter of demeter. they were all raised in their respective states, all had to come to new york for various reasons. jades been there the longest, shes been there 9 years and shes been on a couple quests. her biggest accomplishment so far is how she protected the camp from this big vicious angry hellhound that got past the barrier. naturally the girls fluent in Dog Training, so she steps up and instead of trying to kill this thing, she reaches out and tames it as fast as she can. it ends up actually working, and ever since that day she, her cabin, and the camp have a whole bodyguard sleeping right outside the demeter cabin! hes her steed in battle and hes a Very Good Boy. and his name is becquerel
johns the newest kid at camp, he has no idea who he is or why the fuck his school got attacked or why in the hell those anemoi thuellai were so fixated on him or HOW in the hell he absorbed the lightning one threw at him and ended up fine,,, hes just a big mess right now. a big enough mess that when he got claimed by literally zeus, no one else was around, he shrugged it off as some basic magical happening, and he stayed in the hermes cabin far longer than he should have cause no one! fucking knew he got claimed! by zeus of all people! dumbass. he ends up figuring it out though. like an off-hand mention about how this “weird lightning thing appeared above my head a couple weeks ago, haha weird right?” once he figures it out he realizes “hey i might be able to fly” so he sneaks off into the woods to try it. he succeeds fairly quickly but god almighty everyones face the one day the dude just yote himself off a small cliff without warning,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
dave and rose are really tight, theyve been there roughly the same time length, and since their cabins are across from each other they just bother each other all the time. daves the resident Doctor even though he really doesnt look it cause hes got the apollo powers. apollo is the medicine god. so if you wound your stupid ass in battle daves in the ER room patching you up with his glowy hands. rose on the other hand is a very good strategist. shes one of the only athena kids ever recorded to actually have a power - telekinesis. she has no idea how she developed it, she thinks its from birth, but it freaks her out. shes training it though.
so the beta trolls, are also all human(ish). aradias hades kid. but i pulled a pjo trope on her based on one of my favorite characters (im not saying for spoilers, but if you recognize the situation, You Probably Know Who Its Based Off) and aradia died. her mom, the handmaid, had been pulling some Shady Ass Shit and ended up getting herself killed, but aradia tried saving her and ended up going down with her.
so handmaid gets sentenced to the fields of punishment in the underworld, and aradia gets sentenced to elysium, heroes paradise. shes like “no i want my mom to be okay” so they take that away from aradia and they put them both in the fields of asphodel, the neverending grey space for Not So Good But Not So Bad people. her mom becomes a shade (shadow spirit, no human resemblance), as all people do, but aradia. doesnt? and she gets dunked in the fucking river lethe and if you dont know what that does it erases your memory. so she just. comes out of the river like “hello? wgat tae fukc goin on??” but she still remembers one thing. there was an “a” in her name.
tavros is the son of hermes, hes just kinda taken on the role of backup counselor for when the actual cabin counselor is out. hes in a wheelchair, but he also has prosthetic legs for when he needs to actually stand up and fight. hes really good at it too. also catch him in winged converse cause he Owns Those and Uses Them To His Advantage. hes trying his best to keep focused on the camp, cause aradia was his childhood friend, he misses her a whole lot, she never got to camp in the first place. and to his knowledge, shes still dead.
sollux is a janus kid. thats a problem cause janus is roman, and this is a greek camp. he grew up with dave, he showed up with dave, hes been at camp as long as dave. but hes been unclaimed since he showed up so he thinks hes unwanted by whatever parent he has. he knows hes a demigod, he got through the camp barriers, so what the fuck is wrong with him? he also feels shitty cause hes shit at the greek lessons, he cant read a lick of it which literally every demigod without exception should be able to do, he cant name any gods- well, he can, but.. he gets their names mixed up. why does he keep calling poseidon “neptune”? and he has a much, much different way of natural fighting than other kids. they slice, he jabs. he wasnt taught to jab. 
karkat is an aphrodite kid with vitiligo, and to make matters worse, hes ace and on the aro spectrum. to make matters WORSE, the aphrodite kids are kinda notorious for being really shallow, really materialistic, and really mean. karkats been dubbed the “runt” of the cabin, he gets made fun of for his spots to the point where he uses make up and magic to conceal them. worst of all? hes the kid of the goddess of love, for fucks sake. being reminded that “loveless people shouldnt be able to stay in this cabin, mom must have made a mistake claiming you” is kind of.. a blow to the self esteem. long story short he hates aphrodite for claiming him, and would have rather stayed in the hermes cabin. but he eventually goes on this big quest thats vague as fuck right now but Its The Main Plot, he ends up proving to himself that hes worth something and that his siblings are wrong, and my FAVORITE LINE IN THE WHOLE THING i came up with is HIS when he deals a final blow to some big monster: “REMEMBER MY FACE THE NEXT TIME YOU REINCARNATE. MY NAME IS KARKAT VANTAS, I’M THE SON OF APHRODITE, AND LOOKS CAN KILL.”
nepeta isnt anywhere near developed as others are unfortunately, shes a daughter of ares and shes really really good at hand to hand combat. shes small but she leads groups of people in things ranging from camp volleyball games to actual literal wars. shes a tough little shit
kanaya isnt really developed either, i have yet to figure out most of her powers too actually, shes a daughter of iris, the rainbow goddess though. (blatant reference to both kanayas vampirism and. h. her. sh. es ga. gay) ONE THING SHE CAN DO THOUGH is iris message at will without water or drachmas so really shes just everyones go to cell phone and its fucking hilarious cause people just come into the cabin like “KANAYA I NEED TO TALK TO [X]” and shes like “You Better Fucking Pay Me I Am Not Your Personal Cell Phone”
terezi is the daughter of nemesis and she has this really peculiar power she hasnt really gotten the hang of yet. she has synesthesia, so while she cant see she can smell and taste the colors of her surroundings and its really helpful. sometimes though she gets messages from her mom. they dont even come as dreams half the time, they come as almost a different plane altogether. tez has the power to literally tip the scales, pretty much. and when she gets like that, she can see. shes not on earth though, shit on earth stops when shes like that. shes just kinda In Her Own Head, i guess? and in her head she holds the two scales in her hands. she is the arms of the scale. and depending on which one she lifts up, she can literally alter the fate of the battle or happening thats going on By Herself. once she chooses she just whooshes back to real life though and nothing has changed. the only downside? it takes a LOT of energy and cant be exploited for little things. her one thing on her bucket list is to tap into said powers while getting something from a vending machine so like three things will fall out but it hasnt happened yet and shes upset
vriskas a daughter of tyche, the luck goddess, come the fuck on you knew i was gonna, i havent really elaborated on her either and im upset about that. but hey now you get a break from all those fucking paragraphs
equius is a hephaestus kid, and he kinda stays in the background. hes a range fighter, he spends a lot of time in the forge, and even though its been a project looooong since forgotten, hes been excavating the tunnels under cabin nine for years. by himself. he has no idea where they lead, but dammit hes gonna find out where. he has no idea about a certain bunker in the woods though...
gamzees just there for a fucking laugh tbh hes a son of dionysus and i love that cause hes the god of wine and parties and insanity. usually gamzees just zoning out somewhere hes Not supposed to be, and hes not affected by the maenads FUCKED UP BULLSHIT that goes down the forest sometimes. also hes so fucking scared of tavroses wing shoes he tried them on once while he was high and JESUS CHRIST
eridan is the son of kymopoleia, a SUPER obscure goddess. lets just say dont fuck with eridan cause his mom is the goddess of violent sea storms,
and naturally, feferi is the daughter of poseidon. cause who the FUCK else would she be the daughter of. WHO. NAME ONE GOD
OH AND JUST CAUSE I FORGOT CALLIE AND CALIBORN ARE SATYRS IN THIS AU. CALLIE HAS PAN PIPES. and caliborn still has a gun
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katsukikitten · 5 years ago
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End of Allmight
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A/N lol yall I'm sorry. This wrote itself COLLEGE AU, SECOND YEAR, 18+
You relish the steam of your second scalding shower of the day. Trying to turn the handle further but to avail.
The knob threatens to rip itself from the piping with a groan causing you to stop.
"Fuck you too then." You hiss. Damning the day you've had thus far, praying it does not get worse.
Oh but does it get worse.
It all started this morning with your hero apprenticeship, sure in the end you snagged the villain.
But not before getting your ass handed to you first. Your bruises and cuts scream at the running water as you lather suds across them. Sure to remove any residual sludge from your calves and ankles.
Considering you were dumb enough to play into the trap the villain set up of immobilizing tar. The villain's final blow was intended for you but the hero you were shadowing took the hit full force.
Activating your brute rage to break free of your constraint, snatching the villain in under ten seconds.
You scrub harder as you damn yourself for not acting sooner.
And to top it all off you had gotten into a huge fight with your crush.
A fight that had earned you both a few weeks of house arrest.
Bakugou was in a sour mood when you got home, somehow more sour than you as he shoved you out of the way of the fridge with no remorse.
Usually you could tolerate and hell even understand his crass nature but today was not the fucking day.
You grab onto the fridge door that he is holding with a death grip and slam it shut. Now the only sound in the once loud kitchen of young adults was the rattling of glass.
"What the FUCK is your problem?!" Your voice breaking the deafening silence, "Didn't you fucking see me there?"
He doesn't answer, instead he stares at his distorted reflection in the stainless steel door with a harsh grimace. Kissable lips pulled ever south. His lack of response sets you off faster than the explosions skittering down his spine.
"Oh so you're fucking deaf now too huh?" All of the day's agitation finding a dangerous outlet as you pull your fist back. "Well hear this, cuck."
Your fist connects with his solid jaw as he makes no effort to move. He slides halfway across the kitchen before he turns to face you.
Spitting blood onto innocent counter tops as a bruise develops like a negative slide on his jaw as he lunges.
Much too quickly for you as its powered by his quirk sending you through the kitchen wall, aggravating your wounds.
You break free of his grip, swinging hard but he snatches your fist, holding you still as the skin of his left fist hisses.
A hiss that crescendos much like the kettle on the stove and your nostrils are filled with that all too familiar scent of burning sugar. You snarl using his grip to your advantage as you twist your body, bringing with it your left foot connecting hard in the already blossomed bruise.
He spits crimson again, flashing you his bloodied teeth with a manic, malice filled smile, he tilts his head adding to the effect of intimidation.
Though it is lost on your now.
"You're fucking dead." He growls with his smile as he lunges for you.
"Shit! Someone get Eji!" Denki shouts from the gaping hole, "LIKE NOW!"
Not that Kirishima could stop the two of you with force per say but he was damn good with words.
The two of you exchange punch after breath stealing punch, that seem to break the sound barrier. Decorating the other with their built up frustrations that were overly due to be released.
You pin him and he stares up at you with heated blood red eyes something flashes in them that makes you hesitate before he flips you faster than you can blink.
He slams your shoulders against the ground again for extra measure, his ash blonde hair almost falling over his eyes.
Eyes that no longer have explosive rage, eyes that look more like dull pennies in a wishing well that was long forgotten.
You reach up tenderly, seeing the pain buried so deep, to slide your thumb across his cheek. Lips parted to ask if he is alright as his iris seems to blur.
But it never comes.
"Bakugou! Y/N!" Kiri rushes forward half dressed with a worried Mina staring out of the hole of the dorm.
"What's happening?" He places his hand onto Bakugou's shoulder breaking the spell.
The rage floods back into his eyes as he bucks Kirishima's hand off of him. Standing quickly.
"Nothing is fucking wrong. Just a dumb ass extra was in my way." He muscles past his friend adding to his venom his signature tsk
You clench your jaw replaying it all in your head over and over.
Hyper fixated on the memory of his eyes looking down on you, with what you could have sworn were growing tears.
Something bangs against the wall causing your toiletries to rattle on the tiled shelf pulling you back into the present.
Once, twice, three times before shards of tile are scattered at your feet littering the floor with even more bad luck.
All followed by a deep grunt and your mind instantly thinks of Mina's little comment from the last girls night.
"Uugghhh ladies I'm telling you shower sex with Kiri is the best. He hits me agaisnt the titles soooooo hard. Aaaahhh"
Furiously you snap the water off wrapping yourself in nothing but a towel and deep seeded rage.
The towel threatens to expose your tits but you readjust and make an inappropriate dress out of white cotton as you stomp to the entrance of the next set of showers.
Rare tears threaten to drip onto his cheeks. He let's out labored and heavy breaths as his mind races. Staring at the blue screen illuminating the darkness of the bathrooms. The title of the article that just happens to be trending even years later.
*"End of Allmight?"*
He did this.
He caused the downfall of one of the greatest heroes of all time and all because he was too weak to save himself.
He snaps his phone in half, the innerworkings splinter into the air dusting the floor before he sends the pieces into the wall where the phone some how obliterates further.
He huffs as he reaches over his head pulling his shirt from him in a heated rage. Bruises flower over his ribs, sternum and any other place your powerful fist happened to land.
And all he can think about is how close you had made him break.
All with your delicate hand reaching out to comfort him over something he didn't even know he was still feeling.
That was until now.
Steam fills the bathroom but he does not undress further, leaving his sculpted body in nothing but a pair of black boxers as he paces the room like a caged animal.
He will do anything to chase away the threat of his tears, fists itching to destroy again despite what it may cost him.
He punches the cool tiles, once, twice, three times before he cracks the titles, fist sliced from the shards of porcelain as blood trickles over his finger. He pulls at the fabric of his boxers freeing himself as he stands under the steaming stream of water.
He slams his fist again, letting out another grunt letting the water wash over his sore, tired muscles.
The tears threaten again.
"Oi!" You call out into the bathroom, entering with out a care that you could witness something you cannot be unseen, "What the fuck are you...."
But your question dies in your throat as you see Katsuki looking over his Godly shoulder with those eyes again.
Dull, worn brick instead of burning hot scarlet.
The world seems to fade away with your anger as you approach despite the narrowing of his eyes.
"What the fuck are you doing in the men's showers?" It should come out as a dark growl but his voice threatens to break at the end. If you weren't ignorant to the situation before you sure as hell were now.
You'd never heard his voice falter and so you got closer.
So close you were getting splashed by the spray hitting his reddening skin from the heat.
You press your hand to his opposite cheek, sure to be gentle with the bruise as you turn him to face you. His eyes well with unshed tears.
Tears he has never allowed himself the luxury of.
"Katuski." You say so painfully, as if your heart were breaking in two at the mere sight of him.
And it was.
Breaking over the fact that you let this go so unnoticed after you thought his fight with Deku eased his pain.
In your heart of hearts you knew better. You saw the small signs build up over the last few years but turned a blind eye with every nasty comment you knew he did not mean.
With every harsh glare or shove he sent someone's way.
But mostly it broke over the fact that there wasn't a soul he could confide the vulnerability of his tears in.
Not even himself.
He studies you with quickly blurring eyes, practically hearing the snap in your chest as you reach out to him.
Damn you for using his first name, damn you for using that tone.
Please Kamisama use your knife of a tongue on him again.
Like you had in the kitchen, like you had just a few moments ago.
But Bakugou Katsuki's prayers go unanswered.
Your own set of tears begin to swim in your mesmerizing eyes, a tear catching in your lashes as you blink furiously, voice almost shaking as you speak.
"I..I'm here." And your fingers squeeze so softly and the pad of your thumb swipes so gently that all he can do is damn you.
Damn you as you send him over the edge in the opposite direction of what he's always imagined for you two as his tears slip down his cheeks.
He wraps his arms around you so tightly that you feel his deadly fingers crush blood vessels. He pulls you into the stream of hot water as he buries his face into your hair and throat.
He cannot stop himself as hard as he tries as the sobs rack through his body.
Shaking as he grips tighter onto you, clinging to his last visage of normalcy he thought he had.
Your arms wrap around him, one hand soothing his drenched hair while the other feathers over his shoulders and spin. All the while you whisper.
"I'm here Katsuki. I'm here."
After a few moments he let's out a shaking sigh.
"I did it." His lips move against your throat, "I...I ended All Might."
"What? No..."
"I did." He snarls through gritted teeth, lips still moving agaisnt flushed skin, "I was too stupid!! Too weak....too weak to do anything but get captured by a band of fucking fools."
A few stray tears leave his intense eyes as they meld into the stream of hot water trailing over your skin.
"You did no such thing." There was your tongue that could cut, "You were not weak. You held your fucking own, got out of restraints on your own, stood up to those dumb asses on your own. And escaped with a little encouragement from your friends."
You take in a deep breath and he knows you're about to go into a full on rant, he cannot help the smile that makes it's way onto his lips.
A smile he has not allowed himself to have for quite sometime.
"Bakugou Katsuki is far from the definition of weak. Sure asshole is what the dictionary would read, dick head even but not weak. You've defeated countless villains after surprise attacks on campus. Encouraged your peers through your gruff, arrogant yet determined ways. Helped a friend who struggled with his exams and hell even embodied some confidence in him because you believed in him to do his very best and you wouldn't allow him to think anything less. You should be doing the same to your God damn self! " You let out a shaky breath, " What happened to All Might was inevitable. A move was made on him long before we even got to UA. Hell you probably, even though I'm sure you despise the thought, your fight with Deku had developed both of you. Hopefully for the better."
Katsuki growls against your skin.
"But you have to allow yourself to cry in order not to break. Tears are not weakness. They are a sign that you feel and that you acknowledge how you feel, Katsuki." You squeeze him and he sighs.
You're right, he knows this. He does.
But damn does he hate being wrong.
He hesitates to let go of you, considering how you feel like a piece of heaven, especially after sharing that burden with you.
Your comfort was needed but the situation you two were in, one of you fully naked while the other was in a soaked towel that struggled to fit your thick frame looked...well it looked kinda bad.
And now that Katuski was feeling better he was going to do what he knew how to do best.
Tease you.
"Oi." He says pulling away, sweeping back his soaked ash blonde hair from his eyes, causing you to swallow hot desire. He notices and does it once more before leaning in close.
"If you wanted to see me naked Y/N." All you had to do was ask. You blush as you take in the sight of him before turning away just as your eyes hit the sculpted V pointing you towards your undoing. You swallow as your face, body, and even your core begin to heat.
"I uh..." You stammer and he smiles like a cat stalking prey.
"Speak up, kitten." You blush furious that he knows your weakness.
"How did you.." His smile turns deadlier.
"You know that loud mouth Mina has been trying to get me to date you since you transferred." He studies you for a moment, eyes trialing over the towel that struggles to keep your figure contained, "She told me you like pet names, Princess."
Your eyes snap to him helplessly and he chuckles.
"I thought that was a lie but I see that it's not. Well since you've seen me cry might as well show you how you make me feel." He says cruelly before slamming you against the cool tile by your throat, careful to avoid the exposed shards. He takes in your gasp, can feel your pulse quicken in his fingers, knowing full well you have the capability to overpower him and when you don't...
He devours you. Your lips belong to him to which you gladly devote, as he kisses you with a fervor. Ripping the pitiful sopping towel from your flushed frame as he presses himself against you. He nips your lips and you moan into his mouth as he all but forces his tongue onto yours.
He pulls away abruptly, to study, to give you the time to process his actions.
When you return his gaze with labored breaths and eyes half mast filled to the brim with lust, tears long forgotten he leans in, pressing his forehead to yours. Squeezing your biceps.
"Thank you." He says, placing a gentle kiss to your lips, "Thank you."
"A...anytime Katsuki." You offer softly voice almost lost to his passion as you caress his forearms. He smiles devilishly one more before whispering in your ear with deadly huskiness in his voice.
"Let's make Mina regret telling you how great shower sex is, my little kitten."
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bandtrees · 5 years ago
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6 & 7? 😮
yesss! fanfiction asks! ...this probably needs a readmore it got quite long. enjoy!
Name three stories you found easy to write. - you know what a ship at harbor was? me just talking about my mary headcanons for 1k words. i was hyperfixating on ddadds at the time, mary’s my fav, i already thought about her all the time anyway, + boredom in a church library, boom i wrote that XD in general with the kinda writer i am (nOT to bRAg [flex emoji]) a lot of my stuff is easy, because i tend to just sit down and do a one-shot in a sitting or two and post it as soon as i’m done XD and i like doing it! but there’s a special shout-out to somnium, which was a rewrite of a canon scene i think i did in a class period.  and, of course, a very easy fic for me to write just bc how personal it was was lesson zero! skid’s... pretty much a self-insert, not so much in appearance or personality, but in the way he thinks, if that makes sense. lesson zero was modeled after my own thought processes following a toxic relationship, and to a lesser extent my own experiences with that toxic relationship. i was pretty much just writing out my own thoughts and feelings and putting my oc’s name on em, eheh. wreck-it ralph ocs are cheaper than therapy
Name three stories you found difficult to write. - does present tense count? because i am finding spottedfur’s pride difficult XD multi-chapter fics are not my forte, much less stuff spanning a character’s whole life. i have faith i can do it, though, i tend to write by the seat of my pants but it works haha! even getting an outline down has been tough, just because as someone who writes shorter one-shots, i’m just not used to having to prepare so much, nor have so much build-up before “getting into the action”. pray for me yall, i wont let it die!! in addition to that, there’s also justice in paris: for researching the wounds the characters would have and if i’m over- or under- estimating them. it was a different fic when i first posted it, and then someone pointed out the inconsistencies with how i wrote esmeralda’s injuries, and i was like... time to rewrite it because it’ll bother me forever XD rewriting was hard because there were parts i wanted to keep in but contradicted eachother, not to mention redoing what happens when and where characters are when, but ultimately i’m thankful i did, because i’m happier with it now! whiiich just goes to show that while criticism for someone sensitive like me can be Devastating in the moment it does help you improve! yaay moral lesson of the day :D and, of course, the other behemoth of mine that is unpersoned was very tough to write. for starters, as someone who wants to show the comic’s canon proper respect, it was hard to kind of untangle the timeline. and ultimately my Very Fun headcanon that simon peacock is just an alias didn’t line up with canon, and im certain there are other parts of it that didn’t either, but i did my best XD and hopefully any inconsistencies aren’t glaring! ALSO trying to work out his backstory in general was tough, trying to come up with a feasible reason why he’s all rotting, and THEN trying to write THAT decently... it was tough! but it’s still one of my fav fics iv ever written, so it totally came out worth it <3
wOW i rambled. i just like talking about my writing! thank you for the ask!
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minnie-marvel · 6 years ago
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Ice Cream Run (Peter Parker x Reader)
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When you catch Peter outside your apartment nearly in tears and wearing what looks like a ridiculous pajama set, you decide that there can only be two people that could help him: two buddies named Ben and Jerry.
Peter Parker x Reader
Words: 1342
A/N: i literally named this gif i saved ‘DON’T YELL AT HIM YOU MONSTER
This was a request from my beautiful, spectacular, sickeningly sweet @holland-haven SHE JUST RECENTLY WROTE ME A REALLY CUTE SPIDERMAN FIC CALLED S’MORES BY STARLIGHT!!! Check it out yall!!
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Peter Parker was left on the street with nothing but the cheap tourist clothes that hung on his body. He stared at the grimy concrete sidewalk that was covered in gum and old papers. Tears threatening to leak out of his eyes, stinging and watering all at once. He felt his teeth clench together and his lips press tightly, trying to hold himself back. He suddenly looked up from the ground, mentally readying himself to step inside and make sure May didn’t murder him on top of everything else that he’d lost today.
You were sitting on your apartment steps just a building over, your lips parted only slightly threatening to call out to him. That was Peter, wasn’t it? You two didn’t go to the same school together because Peter was practically a genius and you were just average but you were neighbors. When you were younger you’d practically force him to play some sort of ridiculous game that you would make up on the spot constantly, but ever since middle school things had just gotten distant. You didn’t let it bother you, after all, this was all just hormones. Peter had gotten super busy with his new school and his Stark internship so since then you just hadn’t seen him around. But now he was practically screaming for help.
He looked upset… maybe you should just leave him be. It had been so long since you two had talked it was probably going to end up super awkward. But goodness… that look on his face. It was as if someone just tossed their puppy out in the backyard for the night for chewing their shoes. He just didn’t deserve to look that sad. 
“Hey, Parker!” You shouted from the steps causing his neck to snap towards you his entire body jerking in surprise. 
“Oh Y/N… what’s going on?” He asked sniffling himself quickly trying to regain his composure so that he could speak to you like a normal human being.
“I’m bored out of my mind!! Come on let's go on a snack run!” You encouraged jumping off your steps. Now that you were closer, you could clearly see his red eyes probably fresh from crying. 
“I don’t know, I should probably get back to Aunt May… she’s waiting for me and she’s already worried enough,” You saw him look up at his apartment window glumly. 
You bit your lip. “It’ll be quick I promise,” You said sincerely. “I just wanna talk you know? We never see each other anymore,”
He took one last sad glance at the window before turning back to you. “Just for a few minutes alright? I really have to get back to May,” he said. You nodded beginning to walk to the corner. “That’s all I need.” 
The first minute of your walk was left in complete silence. Maybe Peter needed that too, a moment to collect himself before he could have the chance to cry again.
“Okay Parker, you know that we’re friends but I’ve gotta ask,” You said motioning to his hello kitty pajama pants. “What the heck happened to you?”
“It’s… a long story…” Peter said through tight lips before taking the lead across the street to head closer to the bodega. You nodded. Obviously, this was going to be harder than you initially thought.
“How’s genius school huh? I bet you’re like the top student there nerdface,” Did you really just call him nerdface??? When he was crying like two seconds earlier??? Goddamnit Y/N, have some respect for the kid! 
“It's fine but….” He heaved a heavy sigh. “Nevermind.”
“What? No!” You shouted taking him by the arm. “Parker… I know this is like super weird and awkward because we don’t see each other often and I’m not a super genius like you but…I can at least tell when someone’s got something important on their mind.” You looked up at him trying not to let yourself cry at the sight of his own tears.
He looked like he was the complete epitome of sad. The skin around his nose and eyes were blotchy and red his eyes were still practically watering. His posture was slacked as if he didn’t care if he got run over, hands stuffed in his pockets and back slouched. His hair was a mess and you thought you saw some slight bruises on his arms.
“You’re not getting bullied again are you…?!” You asked the realization setting in. “Did someone force you into that?! Oh god, Peter should I call the police?? I bet it was that one kid… what’s his name Ftalz?? Farts??? Whoever that little shit is I’m gonna roll up into mid-tech and lay waste to his skinny ass-“
“God Y/N, I lost the internship with Stark!!!!” He shouted finally running his hands through his hair in a craze. He tugged at it quickly sucking in sharp loud breaths trying not to break out in another sob fest.  “Is that what you wanted to hear?? You happy that you have me all figured out?!” He screamed now. You could feel the bitterness of his words in every sentence. You saw that there wasn’t any real anger behind him although…just…sadness.
“Hey hey hey….” You said suddenly softer than ever. “I’m sorry Parker I just… shit. I know I can be a busybody, I just wanted to make sure you were good…” You muttered. You stood in front of the bodega with him the pale blue flickering lights scattering across your faces while the night continued quietly. Everything felt delicate and intimate, and you knew that you needed to be careful at the moment. 
“Let’s get some snacks and then if you want, we can talk about it?” You pulled him into the store with you heading straight for the ice box that sat in the corner of the building. You slid the box open and fished inside your fingers dancing across each cold treat with a bit of excitement. If ice cream didn’t cheer up Peter you didn’t know what would.
“They’ve got Cherry Garcia,” you coaxed shaking the ice cream tub gently in front of his face. He only gave you a nod looking around the store seeming lost. You grabbed a tub of cookies and milk ice cream before paying for your sweet icy treat.
“Let’s just chill out and eat some ice cream okay? Nothing a good ole tub of Ben and Jerry’s cant solve!”
The two of you walked out of the store and you handed him his Cherry Garcia. He slowly took it in his hands staring at the small offering before speaking up.
“Listen Y/N… I’m sorry if I was out of line it’s just….its been a hard day.” He confessed. The ice cream was cold almost to the point where it stung at the tips of his fingers but he only clenched it tighter. “With the internship gone I just…”
“Hey,” you interrupted him as you walked together. “I know this is probably a lot for you to handle right now Parker… I just, I want you to know that even though I’m not with you twenty-four seven… that I’m here for you, you know?” You felt your feet stop in front of your respective buildings. 
“You don’t have to tell me anything about what happened today if it hurts too much. I mean the wound is still fresh after all,” You shrugged.  You felt his expression relax only a twinge. It was obvious that trying to explain everything was a huge stress to his demeanor.  
“Thanks, Y/N… for everything.” He said lifting his tub of ice cream in front of him as if he were to say cheers.
 “I should probably just… head into my apartment before Aunt May murders me but… really,” He turned back at you again the sincerity in his gaze could have melted the ice cream in your hands. “Thank you.”
“No problem Parker,”You felt yourself smile. “And hey, if your aunt doesn’t kill you after whatever happened you should swing by the steps and we can properly have our little ice cream date!” You snickered heading up the building stairs.
“Yeah, thanks Y/N… w-wait date???”
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