#Most times I identify as a guy. sometimes I identify as agender

[vampstel]

I feel SO bad right now and it’s annoying. I just wanna draw in peace. Like why am I suddenly being attacked by intense anxiety and dysphoria?? I am literally just drawing wtf

[deafeningfanlight]

TSAMS Headcanons [But ME being uncreative tho :D]

PLEASE LEMME JUST IGNORE THE LORE RIGHT NOW AND INSTEAD HAVE SOME ✨POSITIVITY ✨ SPREAD HERE :'D

Alright, let's get this sh*t rolling >:D

Moondrop uses he/they/it pronouns and identifies as boyflux, sometimes feeling strongly male and at other times less so, occasionally identifying with the agender spectrum as well. [I'M F*CKING BAD AT EXPLAINING BRO BUT I'VE AN EXCUSE: I'm not your teacher, YOUR TEACHER IS GOOGLE NOW SO LOOK IT THE F*CK UP PLS 😭]

Earth believes Santa Claus is real, and if anyone would tell her the truth and shatter her dreams, her whole fam would straight up find out the person's IP adress and idk, sent Monty like a military to the location.

While Ruin was the adorable silly shark we all loved [BEFORE THIS PLOT TWIST HAPPENED-] he forced Solar to particapate in his stage plays. Solar would be the princess, and Ruin would be the prince who would save him :D They got the dresses from Earth, who complimented Solar RESTLESSLY how gorgeous he looked in them :D Lunar would just say:" Stylish twink >:D"

Lunar regresses his age during intense situations and when he's reminded by his trauma. Earth often takes then the caretaker role. [I've not many headcanons for Lunar 😭]

The Bloodmoon Twins love nature and are befriended with some animals in a forest. For example, they play with wolf puppies and go with them on hunts :D AND I HEADCANON THEM AS ASEXUAL AND POLYROMANTIC BECAUSE MY HEADCANONS, MY RULES-

The whole celestial family and their villains are asexual because I think it would be cool if all of them share a single trait and have a common ground :D It would be also logical cuz like, when all kinda have the same code or stemmed from other codes, then it would make sense that they share some traits? 🤔

Moon has a passion for anything related to horror, including true-crime stories and creepypastas that he only reads because he can laugh at them. He would be that type of guy who leaves troll comments on some random creepypasta fanfics XD

Eclipse actually really likes fashion and to simply look stylish! :D He even has a passion for it and spends hours choosing his attire, struggling to decide which one to take. Most of the time, he chooses a a black vest with a white shirt underneath, the sleeves of which are fitted tightly and extend to his elbows. He prefers to go with an old-fashioned and gentlemanly style. However, he doesn't necessarily reject more feminine styles and ocassionally likes to put eyeshadows or an eyeliner on as well. Earth and Eclipse share therefore a common ground because both really like fashion :D

Okay, there SOME POSITIVITY SPREAD! :D Maybe I'll post some angsty headcanons later on, BUT Y'KNOW, MY MOTIVATION IS FASTER GONE THAN A DAMN BUGATTI SO PFF- XD

[hollyhomburg]

Do you identify as trans-masculine or non-binary? You’re recent posts have undermined everything I thought I knew about you. Are you comfortable talking about it?

Honestly I don’t really feel the need to talk about it with people who don’t know me in a sexual context- because that’s the only time super gendered terms really make me feel dysphoric. I like getting called cute and nothing else, boys can be cute and girls can be cute so like- I feel like that’s not anything right?

I don’t really identify as anything tbh, I know this is confusing but if we’re getting into the nitty gritty I think agender is probably the best way to describe me, non-binary doesn’t really fit me. I feel like a lot of people use non-binary as a third gender or a point along the spectrum- whereas I don’t think I fit in at any point on the spectrum. However- I do think I’d /like/ to present as more of a boy sometimes.

But on the other hand, I’ve spent a lot of time and effort to properly present as a girl to give me safety. It’s been very necessary at times to my survival- and that’s kinda what I care about the most- because I think I am so genderless- gender (or at least presenting female) is a tool to me most of the time.

I wonder alot if even trying to transition to be a boy would feel like anything different- or if it would still feel like it feels to present as a girl now- always a show, always something that takes effort, never something that is easy or inate to me. I wanted to transition to being a boy a lot at the beginning. I think if I could be a boy and pass- I’d do it, but because of my genetics I don’t think I could ever go on testosterone- so it’s a moot point kinda. I couldn’t pass so I won’t physically transition until the world becomes safe enough for me to do so.

I will probably never socially or physically transition because of my past too so! not sure if it matters a whole bunch! You don’t have to think of me as being any sort of way! That’s why I omit pronouns from my bio entirely because even “they/them” doesn’t feel totally right.

If you need to think of me as a woman because of how I present that’s fine, if you want to think of me as non-binary or a boy that’s fine too! I just want you guys to think of me as a cute little blob you know? That’s one of the reasons why I love bunnies cuz like- it’s just a bunny- doesn’t matter id it’s a girl or a boy it’s just a bunny :)

[tjmystic]

Before I say anything else, let me be clear that I support trans, nonbinary, and otherwise queer people. I support and want to validate the ways that they choose to present themselves and the things they need to make themselves feel like humans instead of weird dolls that someone slapped a gender onto arbitrarily. This is not a TERF post, I'm not interested in anything TERFs have to say.

Now, with that out of the way, I'm going to do a "woe is me, poor little privileged person" thing, and I'm well aware that it's going to sound dumb, but this blog is basically a virtual diary at this point, and, if you followed me, you signed up to sneak into my room with little flashlights and creep through the pages.

It is SO difficult to hold so-called "normal" or mainstream identities when, in large part, you don't want to have a community with any of the people who also hold such identities. And not just because of them. It's also because of people who are deemed transversive or abnormal. I recognize that this is a purely online problem and that most people who don't match the norm have to hide themselves away in fear lest they be attacked, but I'm not really interested in meeting or doing things with anyone in person, so virtual interaction is what I do. And because I reject everything fascist, white supremacist, evangelical, and misogynistic, most of my curated online experience is very queer. Usually, that's great. I'm not queer myself, but I usually feel like I have more in common with queer people than I do with other cis straights.

But not always.

Here's an example. I get that a lot of people hate the gender binary and find it oppressive. I completely agree that arbitrary gender roles are stupid. I also understand that gender isn't completely binary because, otherwise, nonbinary and agender people wouldn't exist. But people lose me when they say they want to abolish gender entirely. I am a woman and I like being a woman and I have always identified as either a girl or a woman. (Discounting one day when I was 4 and tried drawing hair on my chest with my mom's mascara because I COMPLETELY missed the point of Mulan and thought it meant you couldn't do cool stuff if you were or looked like a girl. My mom clarified things for me.) Taking that away from me would be taking away a big part of who I am and how I define myself. I don't even like the idea of anyone ever asking me about my pronouns, because the idea that someone couldn't be able to tell at first glance that I'm a woman makes me feel gross. Not because being anything besides a woman is gross, but because me being seen as anything other than what I am is. I already feel unsexy and ugly and unattractive on a daily basis, being mistaken for anything but a woman would just make that even worse.

On a similar note, I'm a monogamous person. I like the idea that other people have so much love to give that they don't want to be confined to a single romantic pairing. Sometimes. But, most of the time, hearing people openly describe their relationship goals with terms like, "I don't want to limit myself to one person" and, "It's stupid to think that one person can fulfill all of your emotional needs" is deeply depressing for me. It plants that seed of reminder that even people I think I have a kinship with would never think I'm enough in a relationship, that they would eventually get bored of me and want more because I just can't do it for them on my own. That is devastating to me.

Final example: I'm Christian. Literally no one needs me to explain why Christians are pretty much always the bad guys. Even I have a tendency to cringe away from or otherwise dismiss anyone who calls themselves Christian or talks about Jesus because I know the behaviors and attitudes associated with my religion. But it's still my religion. And seeing people call all religions cults, say we should do away with religion entirely, or claim that religion is the main source of people wanting to murder each other makes me want to bash my head against a wall.

But it doesn't feel like there's an alternative. I'm not talking to people who want to oppress or even murder trans and other queer people. I'm not participating in anything with people who think that enforced monogamy is a good thing. I don't actually see any kinship between myself and predominantly white nationalists who use Jesus as an excuse to do whatever the fuck they want. But it sometimes feels like the only alternative to that is being stuck in a weird "other" box.

I'm not expecting a reward for doing the bare minimum of rejecting the stupid and cruel parts of society. I'm not comparing my "struggle" or whatever to the genuine fear of assault and death that queer people have to deal with on a daily basis. It would just be nice if there was any kind of community that doesn't want to kill or hurt people but is also cool with liking some of the societal constructs we've been born with.

[mazyb0i]

I need advice or help or just some words of encouragement or analysis from other LGBT people please. 💙💚

Tldr; You have to read to understand because it's complicated

Hi guys! You may or may not know me as the super Rick & Morty / Solar Opposites obsessed fan artist but there's more to me than I let on.

I came here because I trust you guys and I wanna know what you all think. I'm Transgender, I identify as demiboy meaning that I'm half non-binary/Agender and half Trans Masculine. This March I turned 18 years old and my doctor gave me my HRT paperwork to look over and bring in signed when I'm ready. I've talked to my therapist about this for over a year, and I questioned my gender identity since I was 12, when I was 6 I never really thought about gender a lot to be honest I did everything under the sun that girls AND boys had done.

Other things to take into consideration is that I'm also diagnosed:

AuDHD (since 16)

Sever Generalized Anxiety Disorder (since 12)

Gender dysphoria (since 16)

Depressive Disorder (since 12).

I've been really adamant about transition since I realized who I was, around 13, it was a long and painstaking journey; full of loss and gain, disorder and chaos, pain and growth, but I made it through to the other side.

Now that I hold these papers in my hands, I'm scared to go through with it, what if I don't like some of the changes? What if people don't see me as who I am? What if I'm not accepted? What if my bullying gets worse? What if I wake up one day and realize all of this was a mistake and I was wrong? Even though it felt so right. I have a lot of dysphoria but I also don't always hate my body, because a lot of the time I see myself as genderless and it only becomes apparent to me that I'm not genderless when someone points it out and calls me "girly", "sissy", "missy", "ma'am", and the such...

Around trans people I feel like I belong, but sometimes I feel like I'm an imposter, what if my brain came up with all of this as a way to try and find a place to fit in because I fit nowhere? I know I'm Pan-demisexual, when I figured that out I never questioned it again. I feel like I roll with the LGBT people but I just feel so much comfort in the trans community.

I don't think I could live happily as a cis-woman. I hate the labels, I hate the pronouns, and if someone were to strip away my skin and all that was left was a white orb I'd say I was a nonbinary male person. I wish I was born the other way, things would have been so much easier, but at the same time I don't want to be a fully cis male if given the chance. I wish there was an in-between option, a lot of times growing up - I had hoped that I was born intersex; hell, I didn't really even know what intersex was, but I still wished it, I wanted it. I wanted to be the third and most rare option because that is who I felt I was. There's this gut-wrenching feeling that I get when I think about having to sign '• female/Woman' on a piece of paper. Because that isn't who I feel I am. But I also feel that what I am is an immovable and unreachable object that no one will ever be able to conceive or understand, and there's no way that I can reflect my understanding on to them.

I'm not going to go in at a very high dose, I know for sure I want top surgery even if my chest doesn't give me as much dysphoria as it did before my breast reduction, and I want to be happier in my skin. I want a deeper voice, I want the other changes that come with it and the only thing I really worry about is not actually being happy when it's all done and through. Not actually being what I am and looking as I am to others as I feel inside...

Anyways that's enough for spilling my guts, I just needed to talk to someone and I'm completely open with all ears if you guys want to share any input in or share any stories, regards, or advice. Honestly I could use people to talk to right now, I feel kind of alone, I feel like no one will understand me; And I don't know if it's just cuz of my autism, or my anxiety,.or if I'm just stuck in my head rn.

[dreadisdelight]

PLEASE DONT READ IT YOURE SENSITIVE TO LGBTQIA+ TOPICS!!!!!!!!:

sometimes i just sit there and wonder what i identify as.

i grew up in an area where i didn't have much representation of anything, "gay" was an insult and colours were dedicated to specific chromosomes. if you grazed football as a girl, you were seen as a tomboy alongside if you even looked at claires you were just odd. i think some messed up part of me still believes that, despite every fibre in my being disagreeing with it. there wasn't much representation of being homosexual in a form or another, mainly just jacqueline wilson books i peered into with such curiosity and utmost wonder.

it sort of struck me that i was different when i was much younger too. hell, sleepovers with girls scared me since they smelled so "sweet" or they were much prettier than me. we all watched films with the odd kissing scene and wanted to peer into the mirror, maybe attempt at looking into it without shame. it didn't stick, yet it didn't wipe off. i kissed a girl on her cheek in my bedroom when i was about nine, fags the most ive ever done, and i don't count it fully either. i kissed a girl on her hand too but still, that doesn't count in my books. nobody ever had the "it's okay to be gay" talk with me but they never had the "being gay is a sin" either. it just sat uncomfortably in the room. all the pins and homemade flags were just pretty colours opposed to something with significance in this world. ive tossed the majority of the relics besides a pin i bought when i had a sense of freedom for the first time but that's about it at most. we still haven't talked about it, and we don't intend on it either.

i remember my mom watching a tv programme with me, her eyes flickering towards me whilst saying "i don't get why people come out. i get where she was coming from, as if it was natural, but she was also the figure who never brought up these sort of conversations. the woman who made me feel a sense of crushing burden when i felt a sense of anger. i just shrugged it off, and never gave my views on the matter. i think if i had the confidence, i would have said something along the lines of "it's because we live in a society where showing who you really are needs courage".

i think i did tell her i was pansexual when i was younger too, this was during a mist of things where id say random bullshit to them as a joke, hoping they'd want to linger nearby. i haven't said a word yet.

gender was another thing that puzzled me, which still does. i never really thought much about it, i just thought you were female, male, or non-binary. that's it. no more options, just three buttons and you could click one. i used to lie awake, my mind thinking about issues for me to go 'holy shit am i trans??' which obviously still happens; why would i be writing this out otherwise? i dipped into being demigirl to nonbinary to immediately agender and i sort of sat there, sticking a label on it like they have to me with other diagnoses. i go from wanting big tits and being the epitome of feminine beauty to wanting to have top surgery and going by a new name. i know gender is a spectrum, but some part of me knows everyone around me wouldn't accept me, thinking im more mentally ill than i am.

i don't know why i decided to type this out either. maybe to give myself clarity instead of chastising myself for what's happened in my world.

ive only ever dated afabs. one cis. one somewhere between demigirl and nonbinary and the other transmasc. i know i hurt them one way or another, and so did they. i speak to one of them a few times now and again but for the other two, i apologised to one of recent and it's stuck to my mind. the other i fucked up so bad it hurts to look into a mirror. i think amabs scare me and i don't know why. i attach myself to older guys in films and loosely to other people, remarrying shane in stardew over and over again. one minute i have a preference and then it drastically changes.

my friend once said that people who are lgbtqia+ must have some evolutionary default in them, which i believe heavily. i have autism and probably some other stuff undiagnosed (my autism is clinically diagnosed yall) so that checks out. i saw a survey a while back that most people who are lgbtqia+ are diagnosed professionally or self with something along the lines of adhd, autism, and other mental disorders. but that's all we are. disordered motions, grasping onto conclusion.

maybe one day i will find somebody and it will make perfect sense. maybe i won't find anybody. for now, i know that i can only try, and when i try i collapse in tears wondering why nobody likes me.

[mythicandco]

tmc queer headcanons because why not I s'pose

by the way don't ship anyone or I will put you in the cube. the BAD one

general orientation stuff:

Mark's aroace, uses he/him pronouns, and has trans vibes but I'm not totally sure? maybe agender. Cesar's pan, trans, maybe poly or ambiamorous? and fine with any pronouns (genderfluid before the word for that existed because. he died before 1994) but prefers he/him most of the time (can be very fem presenting though! lots of eyeliner and dresses n such. they're rocking it)

just for sillies, the whole BPS is bi. Evelin's bi and prefers guys (she's not DIRECTLY part of the 'Society but still), Sarah's bi and prefers girls, Jonah's bi and ALSO prefers guys, and Adam's quoiromantic bi-ace because I've gotta project onto SOMEBODY

Evelin uses she/her and sometimes they/them if she feels like it, Sarah's a transgirl and uses she/her, Jonah's a transguy and uses he/they, and Adam is Adam. (we don't. we don't know what he has going on but he prefers he/him)

Thatcher's ALSO bi (trans, he/him), Ruth is demi and cishet (she/her), and Dave's aroace n agender (I dunno why I feel like both of Alex's characters are aroace? they just. those are the Vibes yknow?). they also occasionally use they/them but usually he/him

all of the alts besides Adam are triple a - aro, ace, agender (get it? because. 333-) and use they/it but I think Gabriel and Six play around with he/him as well

additional things 'cause why not:

Mark and Cesar are stupid and codependent. thank you so much, mustang, for putting them permanently in my brain forever /lh, pos. also their dynamic is really funny because Cesar has like a guy draped over one arm a gal on the other and Mark's like "I don't get it but ok cool" I dunno I laugh thinking about that kind of interaction. they also would probably joke about how Mark let Cesar have all of his gender if they actually knew what that meant

bisexual pride society. that's it that's all I have to say about them

Ruth probably said she was an ally and didn't identify as demisexual because she didn't know that was a thing and died before the term was even coined, but if she did she'd be like "omg that's me!" and now I'm making myself sad thinking about it

Ruth also dated a girl once but ultimately decided it wasn't her thing (I imagine they're still really good friends tho!) because it's okay to try stuff out and decide it doesn't fit you

Dave never needed no bitches, but he does give surprisingly good dating advice (got it by watching Thatcher struggle all through high school. Thatcher, for the record, gives AWFUL advice.)

also the mcp3 went to a pride rally at least once before things went to shit. they deserve it

[the-hydra-sys]

The Nightmare Gang

X

X, the unofficial leader. His pronouns are "I don't care." and he's an all-round unpleasant guy. He's a prosecutor (mix of a protector and persecutor) who sets boundaries and enforces them harshly; he also tends to isolate us sometimes. He's been here longer than most alters, and recently came back from dormancy. He's agestuck at 19 - one of the youngest Nightmare Gang members - and is a half human half ghost. He's dating Ray.

Ray - ❄️

Ray is the Nightmare Gang's gatekeeper. He uses he/that pronouns. Ray is pretty quiet, he doesn't talk much and he's just pretty chill in general. He'll often stop X from being too violent or aggressive towards people, and frequently holds opinions that differ to X's, though the two are very close.

Deus - 🌈

Deus uses he/xe/any pronouns. He's a proud queer anarchist with a violently british accent. He can be flirtatious at times, but typically refrains from it. He's very against capitalism and strongly believes that ACAB. He's pretty relaxed but he's not afraid to make his opinions known.

The Guy - 💥

The Guy - who refuses to pick any other name - is the oldest mortal member of the Nightmare Gang at around 40. He uses he/they pronouns. He has a vaguely southern american accent and likes smoking, though he doesn't do it bodily. He's not afraid to get his hands dirty, and he likes arguing. His advice isn't always the best, but it's not too bad either.

Lija - 🕸️

Lija (pronounced Leah) uses feminine pronouns. She has antlers and a large scar on her face, as well as heart-shaped glasses. She likes sparring and fistfights, and much like the rest of the Nightmare Gang, isn't afraid to make her opinions known or be aggressive - even downright rude sometimes. She has a strong slavic accent, similar to Clara.

Our family is slavic, her name is slavic. We are not appropriating anyone's culture.

Raven - 🐦‍⬛

Raven uses she/xe/they. She maintains that you should question everything, and it is for that reason that she is regarded as an IWC alter - she tends to make people question things they normally take as fact. Xey identify as agender, and their sexuality is down as "fuck around and find out."

Zero - 0️⃣

Zero goes by she/it and identifies as femme-nonbinary. She has bubblegum pink hair and carries around a baseball bat. It's pretty violent and it's classified as a persecutor because of her violent tendencies.

[wowzerwyrm]

As a cis guy, I’ve been considering going on estrogen and HRT.

Cis, in this case, being that I was born male, identified as a boy in my youth, still do identify as a man and use He/Him pronouns, and have no desire to stop if/when I do start on HRT. I probably wouldn’t still label myself as cis at that point, but until then I am just a guy.

I’ve been generally genderqueer and non-conforming, at least as far as I could be in the church I was raised in. Pink ties and long hair and occasional painted nails was closer to blasphemy than not half the time, but I was lucky enough to have a mother and sisters that had fun playing dress up with me so long as I didn’t actually wear a skirt to church.

Now I’m out of that church and in a world and a city where trans and genderqueer people are common, where my colorful socks are standard, where I don’t have to be limited to shoulder-length hair or even skirts. I can genuinely do whatever I want now.

And I’m thinking about HRT.

I’m not a girl, or at least not exclusively. Maybe genderfluid, maybe something else. I don’t feel dysphoria about presenting as a guy, and I’ve always enjoyed being seen as having positive male qualities. But I also think I would enjoy being seen as a girl, more often that I am now.

And under it all, it I had to give myself a specific label or gender based on how I feel inside, (at least compared to how I hear other people talk about it) I’d probably go with agender, or genderless.

I think, if gender is a construct and a performance, then it’s one I enjoy being an actor in, but for others more than myself. At home, I don’t feel any urge to wear anything particularly defining, and I don’t really want to transition in any way just for my own sake. Almost entirely, it would be so I could go out in public presented one way or another, meet people, make friends, flirt, play the part I’ve chosen for the day.

I’m thinking about HRT, so I can more easily do both. I want to be closer to androgynous, not so I can avoid the gender binary but so I can more easily play either part.

And, most importantly, so I can be a little weird about it.

I want to push some of the norms and expectations of those around me, have interesting conversations. I want to follow the rules of being either a guy or a girl so I can more easily break them in interesting ways.

Sometimes, I’d like to just be a girl in the eyes of others, body shaved, makeup on, outfit casual and normal, chill, friendly. Sometimes I’d like to be a little more sexy, loud, silly.

Sometimes I’d like to be a guy, tall and confident and cool and kind, or maybe with ripped jeans and funky clothes and hair styled all over.

I want to go outside as someone else, see how people react to it, and play into it, play around with it. I don’t know what my coworkers will think if I grow boobs but never tell them to call me different pronouns, and it makes me nervous, but also interests me.

I’m just worried, mostly, that I won’t be able to keep up with the image in my head. It’ll be a lot of work, and I’m not sure if some of the side effects will be worth what I’m trying to achieve, especially when I have other priorities, art and writing as well. As well as if I choose to bind fairly often, that won’t be good for my ribs long term.

I’ve got an appointment tomorrow to go in and talk about it and possibly get started on hormones, if I choose to. I’m excited, and nervous, and not sure what I’m going to do.

[random-deepdeanite]

MMU Modern AU Character Sexuality/Gender HCs

Hazel: Bisexual demisexual, no preference, identified as fem nb for a while but liked the label "demigirl" better so they use that now. Wears a binder sometimes, but overall presentation is very feminine. They/she

Daisy: Uses "gay" more than "lesbian", but likes both labels. Has a somewhat loose grasp on her gender identity but still identifies as cis. She/her

Alexander: Bisexual, female preference. Transmasc. Took t, and wanted top surgery but when he started wearing a binder & he changed his mind and was like "nah fam i'm good the chest crusher works fine", mainly bc passing was his main issue and not dysphoria. He/him

George: Unlabelled. Hooks up with people of all genders, but his stance on whether he actually feels romantic attraction is kinda iffy. He/they

Amina: Lesbian, and only labels herself "gay" jokingly. Any pronouns including themeless neopronouns, though she defaults to she/her most of the time.

Beanie: Pan, in somewhere in the aro/ace spectrum, intersex, genderfae, they/she/it. Tried neopronouns at one point, but didn't like them.

Kitty: Lesbian. Very femme, Straight People™️ sometimes don't believe she's gay because of it. Struggled with comphet a lot. She/her

Lavinia: Aromantic demisexual, polysexual (likes men and nb ppl, including those on the fem side of the gender spectrum, but not outright women), genderfluid. In canon, Lavinia has a pronounced chest, so I hc that xe was dysphoric abt that and wanted top surgery ASAP but according to the internet you have to be 17, so got a breast reduction instead. They/it/xe

Bertie: Gay XD. Only likes guys. He/him

Harold: Also gay, and has liked and dated masc nb ppl in the past. He/him.

Amanda: Butch, sporty bisexual, female preference. Awakening was Demi Lovato in the hot tub scene in the Sorry Not Sorry music video (definitely not projecting here). She/they

Henry: Lesbian. Mostly a woman, but like. Girl Lite. Somewhere in the realms of enbyness. She/they

Alfred: Was the "token straight friend" for absolutely ages until they was talking about how they thought romance and sex and gender were all pointless, was encouraged to do some research and exploring. Aromantic, asexual, agender. Dresses masc but somehow exudes androgynous vibes anyway. They/them

Bonuses:

Uncle Felix: ABSOLUTE BICON. He/him

Aunt Lucy: Straight, transfem, had surgery and took hormones- the whole deal. Was impulsive with breast size and had a breast reduction later. She/her

Inspector Priestley: Acts very straight. Surprises everyone by turning up to pride with a gay (mlm) and an ace flag. He/him

[loser-bassist]

My gender is complicated because I’m a guy but I’m genderqueer/agender but if I were to say that to cis people they’d then believe they could call me by any pronouns (and then proceed to default to she/her) because to them genderqueer/agender is just genderfluid and genderfluid means all pronouns.

I’m a guy most of the time but sometimes my gender feels infinite and undefined and beautiful and I’m not traditionally masculine anyways so privately identifying out of the binary helps me let myself take back my own identity and femininity

anyways eyeliner and outfit looked good!

[thelegolashairappreciationclub]

After seeing that which feanorion is least trans poll i want to elaborate on my gender/sexuality headcannons for the finweans so lest go! Feanorions first.

Maedhros: he/they/she. ive said before that i HC Mae as having kleinfelter syndrome and i think part of the reason he's considered to be so striking in appearance is because instead of having the genderless androgyny of most elves he sort of expresses both extremes of gender at all times. He does not identify as genderfluid before his death. Very much understands that Something is up but hahaha we dont have time to unpack that. Also very much feels beholden to the identity of feanors *Eldest Son* and his identity as Heir. After rebirth they default to they for a while but eventually become comfortable enough to really enbrace their fluidity.

Maglor: ... i am so sorry but he is Extremely cishet imo. Very bohemian about it, definitely has Tried it all but came to the conclusion that no he is a man and he likes women in the end. Very much a wife guy. HOWEVER, it is important to me that almost everyone assumes he's gay or trans because he is deeply flamboyant.

Celegorm: he's cis insofar as he's not trans. I legitimately think in modern au he would have a fursona and he would consider that his gender, extremely based of him. Very bisexual but not at all romantically inclined. Also he only uses the bi label so he can clapback at people.

Caranthir: Agender, Asexual, Aromantic. Has got 0 time for any of that. Knows he's triple A but cannot be bothered to change pronouns or correct people so uses mostly he. This is regardless of his agab because i think he looks pretty similar to his brothers and so ppl usually assume he's male. He is married but its a queer platonic situation and he has a similar relationship with Haleth.

Curufin: He takes after his father, bisexual man. It makes 0 difference if he is trans or cis imo because i think he has always identified as such and was raised male pretty much as soon as he was able to verbalise his identity. Shocking lack of identity crisis in any situation, very secure in his identity to the point of being well... a bit of a dick to those who are less confident.

Amrod: Pansexual aro af. Doesn't really differentiate his attraction to others between platonic or sexual but also doesn't really care for romantic relationships. He is a cis man but he's also a theatre kid and thinks drag is very fun and absolutely an art style.

Amras: is panromantic and asexual. He is almost comically romantic. He absolutely finds The One like every 6 moths and is absolutely devastated every time it doesn't work out. Actually writes romance novels and even bodice rippers but finds real life sex to be gross messy and deeply awkward so he sticks to fiction. Is Cisn't. Like he's a man most of the time but he gets Too In Character sometimes and will occasionally just switch gender until she's finished her next book and then go back.

[mariposa-de-la-luna]

cw: sexual activities and orientation, gender experience

what does it all mean?? i used to loosely identify as a trans guy when i was 17-20 (basically i was non-binary but heavily masc-leaning), but then i realized that im agender AND i love soft aesthetics, skirts and dresses, lace, long hair etc… plus i don’t really even understand the idea of gender or believe in it lol. but uhhh. yeah idk i don’t really feel that much like a girl at all?? if anything i think i feel more masculine inside?? i enjoy presenting feminine and dressing how i want but sometimes i want to dress like a boy hahahaha. most of the time i like my dresses and stuff but i like boy clothes too

anyway tmi coming up but i occasionally get horny and when i do i occasionally like to listen to sexy audio (the talking ones lol), and lately ive been really into audios made for men? like F4M yknow. so what the fuck does that mean and what does any of it mean and i honestly don’t really want to be genderfluid tbh like in order to be satisfied as a genderfluid person i would want to come out and like go by different pronouns depending on the day or whatever but that’s so confusing and most people find it super cringe. i could maybe go by they/them but honestly those are my least favorite pronouns and i prefer she/her or he/him but neither all the time which is asking too much of people. annoyingly

but yeah like i think all the time about how i wish i had a dick and i wish i was born a boy so i could dress feminine in a way that didn’t read “tradwife” and feel equally valued as a top or a bottom and maybe even be more desirable.

literally what am i saying and what are the implications of all of this, and have i just been trans this whole time and i just have internalized transphobia so i ignore it or shove it down, i don’t think im transphobic at all and i definitely identify as nonbinary but what the fuckkkk being nonbinary is so easy when you’re cis passing, it gets a whole lot weirder and harder when you want to cross genders lol

[aspens-orchard]

Just wanna make a post describing my gender fully bc today is a very body and mind day, y'know? Today is a very human day.

My gender. I personally identify as Genderqueer, but I sometimes say Genderfuck bc I feel like the curse word encapsulates how I want to be perceived better. I am a man in the most feminine way. I am not a man. I'm a woman but only in my interests and hobbies. I am not a woman. I am non-binary in an aesthetic and emotional kind of way, but I'm also not non-binary, y'know? I use non-binary as an umbrella term for my gender, not as an identity. A lot of things give me gender euphoria like skirts and having average sized tits and thigh highs but I am in no way a woman. I also get gender euphoria from being called [noun]boy, like catboy or femboy. I'm in no way a man or a boy, but I'm still gay. I'm gay in an mlm way but I'm not male. I'm gay in a gay sex and sunset picnics way but still not a man. I'm not masculine. I really enjoy femininity, but in the kind of way where it's like you can tell someone's a guy but they're REALLY feminine. Again, still not a guy and still not a girl. I don't really use any word based neopronouns bc I just don't feel like any of them fit me, I do use Zey/zem and it/it's tho. Zey/zem just feels like my gender. My gender is zey/zem. It/its is kinky but not in a sex way? I can't really explain it but it's like... I dunno. I'm it/its in the "Afab goth agender" kind of way. I guess I'm Agender in a sense, but I'm also so full of gender. It's not fluctuating between no gender and tons of gender, it's both at the same time. It's not bigender or pangender either, it's one cohesive gender that is inexplicably genderless and also so full of gender. My gender is the color scheme of black, white, and red despite my favorite color being purple. My gender is also greens and browns. My gender is also pastel pinks and lavenders. My gender is the concept of Sin. My gender is the song "The Exorcist" by CALYPSO. My gender is blood dripping from eyes and pure white pupils. My gender is silver spiky hair, but also black and purple fluffy hair. My gender is as much silver jewelry possible. My gender is the trans flag. My gender is the maximalist aesthetic. Maximum gender, maximum aesthetics, maximum euphoria from my names and pronouns.

So yes, I'm Genderqueer, Genderfuck, Non-binary, Transgender, Agender, and a bunch of unknowns. All of those things, all at once.

My gender is Maximalism.

[olderthannetfic]

(The majority of members of these communities are not monosexual either. They tend to be like a third bi/pan/etc. and a third ace as far as I can tell. That’s sort of a side point but sort of not. These are spaces of liminal queerness and contested identities played out on less contested bodies, just as drag plays out contested queer genders in the form of parodic excesses of conventional genders.)

-

could you elaborate on what you mean by this a little? it resonates as accurate, certainly i use fandom spaces to explore asexuality and gender and the like, but i'm wondering if there was anything specific you were trying to get at as well

--

A lot of commentary about BL type fandoms focuses on cis gay men and the idea that we're writing about gay men. Sometimes, that's true. There are certainly phases where I see a lot of presumed-straight-in-canon characters written as 1000000% gay. But it's far, far more common to find bi men in m/m fanfic than in m/m movies or other bigger pro media.

To understand what the deal is with these BL spaces, you have to grapple with the fact that it's not primarily The Straights, nor is it cis gay men writing about cis gay men. It tends to be people who don't have a tidy category to write about. Not that one can't write OCs who are exactly like oneself, of course... but...

I guess it feels a little mean to me the way there's this 'stay in your lane' vibe coming off of a lot of critique. If you're a cis gay man, you're going to get kicked around by society, but what your lane is is reasonably clear.

If you're like "Uh... nb... I guess? Or genderqueer? Or agender? I don't fucking know!" are you supposed to pick a specific identity and stick to that? Does the Council of Genderweird need to hand down a ruling on which genders you're allowed to write about, or does it just have to match what's in your pants? (And if so, what about people with ambiguous genitalia? They exist!)

Bisexuality and asexuality are moderately less confusing than a lot of gender stuff, I suppose, but even though stereotypes of bi men and bi women are different, there's a certain commonality to both being bi. Ditto bisexuals of other genders. Same with asexuals of various genders. These identities aren't in neat gender boxes. They don't fit tidily into a bifurcated notion of "queer history".

These are identities that don't have history.

I don't mean "nobody was ace before five years ago on tumblr, hur hur". I mean that the scanty history we do know of queerness tends to be of cis gay men and cis lesbians. Some of those individuals in the modern day would likely identify as bisexual, trans, and all sorts of things, but we don't have them around to ask. We have a written record and the attempts at historical preservation the queer community has done in the past, which tended to simplify things to gay guys and lesbians most of the time.

So when I catch a whiff of "Leave the m/m to cis gay men" or even "Leave the m/m to cis queer men", it irritates me because it's so obviously punching down.

BL fandom is an active process of people in these mushy boundary categories creating a record of our self expression.

Slash fandom is the birth of a bi aesthetic. It's necessary allegorical distance for people who don't feel at home in their parts, at least not if those parts are bumping uglies, whether that's because they're asexual or because they're trans and partners see them the wrong way right now. It's an amorphous queer space carved out for those of us who aren't hanging out in the rigid cis gay men and cis lesbians camps.

Which isn't to say that cis gay men or cis lesbians aren't also in BL space. They absolutely are. I just think tumblr has been trained to center these two experiences by a lot of rhetoric about ownvoices and representation.

What if you have an identity where Representation™ of yourself makes you uncomfortable? What if you don't know what you are? What if you're so weird you might be the only one?

Cis gay men's gender is an area where a lot of assumptions get foisted on them by society. They also have a more complex relationship to gender and to various cultural norms than cis straight men do. Drag performance has often been a way of exploring that. It's easier to express this complicated mess through a metaphor than through just depicting gay men's actual genders and other people stereotyping them.

Cis gay men are allowed that kind of space to play.

But BL fandom people are not afforded that same space and respect.

There is a constant demand that our art be for other people rather than ourselves and that we never descend into allegory that might overlap with somebody else's literal representation.

I think this is a bad trend and its philosophical underpinnings are rotten.

[spanishskulduggery]

Hi! I'm very curious about something regarding the Spanish language. I'm currently studying A2 Spanish but I had this question and my teacher did not seem too willing to discuss it. Here it goes:

I know that Spanish has, something my Spanish teacher says, linguistic gender. I was wondering how do the people who don't align themselves with the gender binary (masculine and feminine) speak/write in it? I have read this article about Spanish speaking people from US adding "x" Or "@" and people from Argentina using "e" to make the words gender neutral.

Thank you so much for responding, whenever you get to it. Also love your blog. ❤

Short answer, in general speaking terms people are tending towards the -e now because the other two are very hard to actually speak, and because Spanish-speakers feel the -e is more authentic

What you're most likely to see in Spanish is masculine plural as the default, or in written things you might see todos y todas or like un/una alumno/a "a student", or like se busca empleado/a "employees wanted" / "looking for an employee"

If it's something official or academic you typically include both [todas y todas] or you go masculine plural [todos] unless it's specifically feminine plural

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Related, linguistic gender applies to all things, not just people. Why is la mesa "table" feminine, but el libro "book" masculine? Just linguistic gender. I can tell you that most loanwords (that aren't people) in Spanish are masculine, and that there are certain words that come from Greek are masculine, and that -ista words are unisex most of the time... And I can tell you there are some words like testigo or modelo that are unisex and don't change for gender. Aside from that, speaking about nouns and grammatical gender... those particular things are harder to parse for regular people, but if you go into the field of linguistics you can explore that more deeply. Some of it is source language (i.e. "it came from Latin this way") or things like that. And in general when talking about nouns it's unimportant and not considered sexist, that's just how it is.

There is such a thing where it gets a little too far the other way and people will say "history? what about herstory" which is a nice thought but the etymology has nothing to do with gender there

When it comes to people - and when it comes to gendered attitudes - that's where it gets more confusing and more complicated.

I believe there was an experiment where people had French and Spanish speakers [I believe it was Spanish] try to identify how a "fork" would sound. French people gave it a more feminine voice because "fork" is feminine in French, while Spanish speakers gave it a more masculine voice because it's masculine in Spanish.

Whether we like it or not, certain gendered things do influence our thoughts and feelings and reactions. A similar thing in English exists where the old joke was something like "There was a car accident; a boy is rushed to the ER and the surgeon but the father was killed. When they got to the ER the doctor said 'I can't operate on him, he's my son!'" and it's like "well who could the doctor be?" ...and the doctor is his mother. We associate "doctor" as masculine and "nurse" as feminine.

There's a gender bias in our language thought patterns, even though the language changes. And that does exist in Spanish too, to different extents.

There are certain cultural and gendered stereotypes or connotations attached to certain words, many tend to be more despective or pejorative when it's women.

For example - and I know this has changed in many places or it isn't as prevalent - el jinete "horseman/rider", while the female form is la amazona "horsewoman/rider". Because la jinete or la jineta was sometimes "promiscuous woman".

There were also debates about things like la presidente vs. la presidenta or what the female version of juez should be, whether it should be la juez or la jueza

Most languages with gendered language have varying degrees of this, and all languages I'm aware of have gendered stereotypes related to professions or cultural attitudes in some way, and not just for women, and not all in the same way with some of them being very culturally based

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The longer answer involves a bit of history, and I'll be honest, some of it is contested or considered a little controversial in Spanish-speaking countries particularly in the conservative parts (which honestly should come as no surprise)

The first symbol that I know of that came about was the X

First piece of contested history: As far as I know, it was the trans/queer and drag communities in Latin America who started the trend of X. When there were signs or bulletins that had the gendered endings - specifically masculine plural as the default plural - people would write a big X through the O. This was a way of being inclusive and also a very smash the patriarchy move.

Some people attribute this to women's rights activists which may also be true, but a good portion of the things I read from people say it was the trans/queer/drag communities in Latin America doing this.

I've also read it originated in Brazil with Portuguese; still Latin America, but not a Spanish-speaking country.

Where it's most contested is that some people will say that this trend started in the Hispanic communities of the United States. And - not without reason - people are upset that this is perceived as a very gringo movement.

That's why Latinx is considered a very American-Hispanic experience

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The arroba (@) is relatively new. I remember seeing it in the 2000s. I don't know if it existed earlier for gender inclusivity.

People used it because it looks like a combination of O and A, so it was meant to be cut down on saying things like todos y todas or niños y niñas in informal written speech

I remember quite a few (informal) emails starting like hola tod@s or muy buenas a tod@s or things like that

I think of it more as convenience especially in the information age where you never knew who you were talking to and it's easier than including both words, especially when masculine plural might be clumsy or insensitive

Still, it's practically impossible to use the @ in spoken Spanish, so it's better for writing casually. You also likely won't be allowed to use the @ in anything academic, but in chatrooms, blogs, or forums it's an option

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I love the E ending. And the gender neutral form in singular is elle... so it's él "he", ella "she", and elle "they (singular)"

The -e ending is I think became more common within the past 10 years though it might have existed longer than that. These sorts of changes tend to come from the queer or trans communities and tend to be more insular before becoming more of an outside thing that then the general population finds out about

It came about because there are some adjectives in Spanish that end in -e that are unisex. It's not an A, it's not an O, but it's something grammatically neutral for Spanish

It's not as awkward as X, and E exists very firmly in Spanish so it's not perceived as some outside (typically gringo) influence

The good news is, it's pretty widespread on the internet. Not so much in person (yet), but especially in Spain and Argentina at least from what I've seen, particularly in the queer communities and online culture.

The only issues with it are that for non-native speakers, you have to get used to any spelling changes. Like amigo and amiga, but to use the E ending you have to add a U... so it's amigue.

That's because there are certain words where you have to do spelling changes to preserve the sound; gue has a hard G sound like -go does [like guerra]... but ge has the equivalent of an English H sound [gelatina for example]. Another one is cómico/a "funny" which would go to cómique. Again, because co has a hard C/K sound, while ce is a soft sound more like an S or in some contexts TH/Z sound; like centro is a soft sound, while cola is a hard sound

Unless you make it to the preterite forms where you come across like pagué, alcancé, practiqué with those types of endings... or subjunctive forms, pague, alcance, practique ... Basically you'd have to be exposed to those spelling rules or you'd be really confused if you were a total beginner.

It all makes sense when you speak it, but spelling might be harder before you learn those rules

The other drawback is that the E endings are sometimes not applicable. Like in damas y caballeros "ladies and gentlemen" there's not really a gender neutral variation on that, it's all binary there. And while la caballero "female knight" does exist, you'd never see a male variation on dama; the closest I've ever seen is calling a guy a damisela en apuros "damsel in distress" in some contexts where the man needs rescuing, and it's feminine una/la damisela, and it's very tongue-in-cheek

There are also some contexts like jefe vs jefa where I guess you would say jefe for "boss" if you were going the neutral route, but it's a bit weird because it's also the masculine option.

I can't speak for how people might feel about those if they're non-binary or agender because every so often you kind of get forced into the binary whether you like it or not

I totally support the E, I just recognize there are some limitations there and it's quirks of the Spanish language itself

Important Note: Just to reiterate, E endings are the ones most Spanish-speakers prefer because it's easiest to speak and doesn't have the American connotation that X does in some circles

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Where it gets very "Facebook comment section" is that you'll see many Latin Americans traditionalists and conservatives claim that "this is just the gringos colonizing our language" and "grammatical gender doesn't matter in Spanish". They'll say that the "gender movement" is an American feminist movement and that it's a gringo thing and doesn't reflect actual Latin Americans or Spanish-speakers

Which on the one hand, yes, English does have a lot of undue influence on other languages because of colonization, and American influence and meddling in Latin American politics is a big important issue

But as far as I'm aware of the X (and especially the E) were created by Latin Americans

The other issue I personally have is that any time this conversation comes up, someone will say something like somos latinOs and claim that masculine plural is gender neutral

To that I say, first of all, "masculine plural" is inherently gendered. Additionally, there is a gender neutral in Spanish but it's lo or ello and it's only used with "it" so it sounds very unfriendly to use on an actual person... and in plural it looks like masculine plural and everything applies like masculine plural

Second, the reason masculine plural is default is because of machismo. It's more important that we don't possibly misgender a man, so it has to be masculine plural. It's changed in some places, but growing up when I was learning Spanish, if it was 99 women and 1 man you still had to put masculine plural

I'm not opposed to there being a default, and I understand why it's easier to use masculine plural, but some people get very upset at the idea of inclusive language

...

In general, my biggest issues with these comments come when people act like non-binary/queer/trans people don't exist in Spanish-speaking countries, like English invented them somehow. So it's nice to see linguistic self-determination and seeing native speakers using the E endings.