#In the end I never choose just repeat the scene over and over in my head | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

demaparbat-hp · 7 months ago

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Hi Dema!! Your art is fantastic and even the lineart is awesome! Solid and confident in where it's thick and where thin. I really like how your style has characters look more realistic and they have specific consistent features. Your blog has a pleasant atmosphere, and you're skilled in weaving AUs! There's a lot of details and structure, and I'd like to ask if any of them have a full story arc? Could you do a list of all of the AUs? Is there a motif that you especially like that repeats in any of the AUs? And whenever you add comments to my stuff in the tags I literally smile, it makes me want to keep at my plan to create everything I have in mind. So I'd like to spread this joy! I hope you have a nice day! (from late-draft ^^)

Hello, Late-Draft! I wasn't expecting this ask at all but I'm so glad to have received it!

First of all—I'll try to hold myself back from giggling like a schoolgirl. I'm having a sempai noticed me moment over here and that's just embarrassing. So give me a second to compose myself, if that's alright?

Okay, I'm back.

Now, on to business.

Character design, especially when it comes to facial features and how they're unique to each person, has always been a passion of mine. I always try to have a solid design for each character. I choose which features feel like the character in question, which face feels natural to draw, and go along with it. I love drawing Katara as much as I love drawing Zuko. Meanwhile, I seem to be on a never-ending battle against Sokka's features. Woes of an artist, I suppose.

Character design is actually one of the reasons I love your work so much, in case you hadn't noticed. I'm currently experimenting a bit with a different style... Hopefully it won't be long before the artwork is done and I can share it over here. I'm so excited for everyone to see it!

Now it's time for the reason we're all here.

I have said it before and shall say it once more: AUs are my lifeblood.

I love them so much! Building them, daydreaming the scenes, thinking of the characters and how they differ from their canon versions. The arcs and the themes and the worldbuilding. Building AUs is my passion, and I have so many of them!

There are a lot of motifs and themes that tend to repeat themselves in several of my AUs, I believe.

You'll notice that most of my stories are Zuko-centric, with a heavy emphasis on grief and humanity. There's the question of what makes us human and how to move forward when the whole world seems to push you back. I put a lot of stock in metaphors and symbolism within the narrative itself. I'm especially interested in the nuance of war and how it affects people emotionally, physically, and psychologically

I also tend to reutilize some elements of the lore and/or worldbuilding! Such as the Painted Lady's backstory, or the existence of War Children within the ATLA universe.

Now, the list!

I think I'll start with my current project, if that's okay :)

For the Spirits (New Gods AU)

Zuko was a child when he met Agni. Then, the spirits started coming to him. Eyes hidden in the hallways, voices pleading for help, for recognition, for remembrance.

Zuko could see Agni. He could see the broken remains of a Great Spirit and the empty smiles of amnesiac ghosts.

And they could see him in return.

I've been working on this AU for a long time, but only now did I get the chance to start writing the fic (linked up there!). I'm extremely excited about FTS and where the story will lead us in the future, but I'll try not to spoil too much.

It's a Zuko-centric story, with a heavy emphasis on Spirits and humanity. I'd like to add a warning for depression/mental health issues.

To Hesitate (Lee & Kya AU)

As she watches Lee and Kya avoid each other's eyes from across the room, the phrase comes back to her, swift and silent:

"To hesitate is to lose."

As Song treats the victim of an unfortunate interaction with a rare poisonous flower, her day takes an unexpected turn when it becomes apparent that the old man's nephew and her assistant have history.

A vivid history.

The Lee & Kya AU is a vibe, a feeling. It's probably one of my oldest AUs out there as well as one of my dearest.

A classical Lee and Kya From The Tea Shop AU, full with wholesome fandom tropes such as: fake (but not really) dating, fake identities, Ba Sing Se shenanigans, vigilante stuff, White Lotus missions, Iroh is a great Uncle, Zuko is an awkward turtleduck, and, of course, the fluffiest fluff you'll ever see.

Other than that, Lee & Kya is probably one of the less plot-focused AUs I have. However, that doesn't mean that there aren't scenes I can't wait to write or a canon divergence or two where Zuko is concerned.

(I have another fic posted but I'll leave that one to the end. You asked for a full story arc and, oh boy, does Soundless deliver.)

Kintsugi AU

Closer to being canon-adjacent than canon-divergent, Kintsugi is yet another Zuko-centric AU (and are we not noticing a pattern over here?).

I'd love to explain it in depth, but I believe the caption of the artwork linked above does a better job at explaining than I ever will.

Kintsugi is the art of decorating your scars with pieces of Agni.

In the Fire Nation, the amount of golden marks are a sign of status. Only the Royal Family can afford to seal every single wound with Kintsugi. Such is the weight of this tradition that, among the ones with Agni's blood, it is the highest mark of dishonor to have a natural scar, for it proves you aren't worthy of the privilege.

After the Agni Kai, Ozai forbid Zuko's scar to be sealed with Kintsugi. The boy wasn't worth his title, his traditions or his pride. Zuko would be broken, but he wouldn't be beautiful. Not anymore.

(And sometimes it's easier to pretend he never was)

Kyoshi Warriors AU

One of my absolute favorites!

In this AU, Ursa took Zuko and Azula with her when she was banished, so they could start anew. With help from Iroh and the White Lotus, she managed to relocate her freshly burned eight-year-old child and her crying daughter to Kyoshi Island.

Years later, when Avatar Aang and his companions first arrive at Kyoshi Island, they're met by the Kyoshi Warriors and their leader, Noriko of pale skin and warm brown eyes.

The Gaang leave Kyoshi Island many weeks later with a new companion. And if Jian Li, with his war paint and his scar and his dual dao, gives the island that he has called home for so long one final, longing glance as they fly away on Appa, they pretend not to notice.

Hunters AU

We're starting to dwelve deep into dangerous waters!

This is a Katara Joins Zuko In His Quest To Find The Avatar AU, with a twist!

This AU was born as a writing experiment. What if we take Katara's character, and change one of her core characteristics? Katara, who looked up to the Avatar as a saviour figure, now blames him for leaving and allowing the Fire Nation to wage war on the world.

Then comes Zuko, a banished Prince with a crew full of traitors and his own agenda. Zuko wishes for nothing more than to dethrone his father and end the war. He is a White Lotus member, an honorable, driven young man, and he has a plan.

The catch? He needs to take the Avatar to his father if he wishes to regain his title and be able to rightfully take the throne. Oh, and he will deliver the Avatar to the Fire Lord—but nobody said it had to be in chains.

Halfblood AU

I watched Blue Eye Samurai a few months ago and it destroyed me. The idea of a half-blooded child dead set on getting revenge for their very existence stuck with me, and this AU was born.

Kanna made a life for herself in the Earth Kingdom after leaving the North. Katara was raised by her grandmother in a small village, being taught to hide her bending if she wanted to live peacefully in a place she was only half of. Her mother had died in childbirth. Her father, a nameless warrior from the Southern Water Tribe who had loved Kya and left her behind, didn't know of Katara's existence.

Katara took over Kanna's clinic after she passed away. Always taking care of others. Always suppressing her need to bend. Always wishing for more.

One day, he arrived. A half-child, just like her. But while she was of Water, he was a son of Agni. He was searching for the man who brought him to this world. The man who scarred him. The man whose face he couldn't recall, whose name he did not know. The man whose specter had chased his mother to her grave. The man who would die at his hand.

The answers were hidden in a small teashop deep within Ba Sing Se. Lee offered her a way out, and Katara took it.

Soundless (Uiscefhuaraithe)

Katara of the Southern Water Tribe has hands scarred by fire and great talent, though no teacher.

Zuko is a mute War Child, a herbalist and healer, and the Blue Spirit. He bears the mark of fire, and the scar of the blade that took away his voice.

The first time they met, the Blue Spirit had just saved her, tough not before her hands got burned. The second time they met, his name was Lee, and he was healing her.

They live in war and they will fight, if not for the world, then for themselves.

You asked for a full storyline, and I shall deliver!

Soundless is probably the only AU I have fully planned. Three-books, Azula redemption arc, role-reversals and all.

This AU has everything. From travelling through the Earth Kingdom together, to odd character team-ups that somehow manage to work, and a major goal/conflict to resolve.

Zuko and Katara must find their way to Omashu in an Earth Kingdom ravaged by war as they also grow to understand each other, themselves, and the world around them. They meet with new and old alliances, keep their ears open for rumors of the Avatar (They say he is an airbender, Lee. Do you truly belive that?), and do their best to always be two steps ahead of their pasts.

Meanwhile, both the Northern and Southern Water Tribes are searching for the runaway heiress, Aang must find his way alone on this new, hostile world, and Azula must face the revelation that, despite what her father has stated for the last two years (liar, he lied at her! Her! He lied he liedliedliedlied), her brother might just be alive.

I'm sorry for making this such a long answer! I just get very excited about these subjects and don't know when to stop. If you made it all the way down here: thank you again.

I hope you have a good day ❤️

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pesky--dust · 6 months ago

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Do you believe Will orchestrated the escape? Was he intending to flee with Hannibal or was he genuinely planning to kill him?

First of all, I think that Will is a character whose behavior we cannot predict - just like Hannibal said.

In the first season, Will was vulnerable, but in the second season, he started manipulating people to get what he wanted, and he told Alana and Hannibal that he was an unreliable narrator of his own story. And I believe that this is true throughout the series, to a greater or lesser extent.

In The Wrath of the Lamb Dolarhyde attacked Will in a motel. Will was aware that Dolarhyde wanted to meet Dr. Lecter, Dolarhyde himself told him so! And this scene, according to the script, ends with the following words:

CABAL. The synonym for this word is intrigue.

So I believe that Will decided to use Dolarhyde to free Hannibal, knowing now that since Hannibal loves him and Will plays it right, Hannibal will do whatever Will asks him to do.

So yes... I believe it was orchestrated by Will to some extent.

However, was he intending to flee with Hannibal or was he genuinely planning to kill him?

That's a good question! And I will repeat what I have already written: I think that we cannot predict Will's behaviour. In Mizumono he called Hannibal at the last minute and was not sure what to do until the very end and in The Wrath of the Lamb Will tells Bedelia, "Decisions are made of kneaded feelings. They're more often a lump than a sum". It is what actually drives him.

I think he wasn't sure how this escape would turn out. Would Dolarhyde kill Hannibal? Both of them? Or would Hannibal kill Dolarhyde and him? Maybe just Dolarhyde? Or maybe he'll just leave the FBI's dirty work and not get his hands dirty in the process?

And so, another pillar of this series is curiosity. I believe that apart from his feelings, Will was also guided by his curiosity about what would happen. In my opinion, there was no grand plan. "Everything that can happen happens. Has to end well, and it has to end badly. Has to end every way it can", "If everything that can happen happens, you can't really do the wrong thing. You're just doing what you're supposed to do" (Primavera).

[EDIT, because I forgot to write about something I find important]

In ... and the Beast from the Sea, Will tells Hannibal, "I'm not Fortune's fool, I'm yours". "I'm Fortune's fool" comes from Romeo and Juliet. It's about acceptance of the fact that you have no control over your life, because everything is up to fate; Will tells Hannibal that he is his fate and so he accepts it. And in the very next episode Will finds out that Hannibal in fact loves him.

In The Wrath of the Lamb, when Will comes to Hannibal to ask him to be a bait, in his memory palace, he stands on the skull engraved in the floor, where years ago Hannibal left him his broken heart. Will accepts Hannibal's heart now and chooses him, with all its consequences, not knowing what would happen.

[END OF EDIT]

And in The Wrath of the Lamb, Will tells Reba that Francis couldn't watch her die. When Dolarhyde shot Hannibal, Will reached for his gun. I think that both curiosity and his own feelings made him want to protect Hannibal and kill Dolarhyde in this very moment.

His feelings after killing Dolarhyde caused him to throw himself and Hannibal off the cliff (personally, I think the fall didn't happen at all and is just a metaphor, but that's a topic for another post), knowing that he would never feel better.

This answer turned out to be longer than I thought, so tl;dr:

Yes, Will orchestrated the escape.

Will is driven by his feelings, curiosity and whims (as Chilton said in Hassun), so I think that he didn't have any bigger plan than freeing Hannibal and see what would happen and then ended up being driven by his feelings. So I would say that he neither planned to run away with Hannibal nor to kill him. He was acting on the spur of the moment. If Hannibal killed Dolarhyde? Great, one serial killer down. If Hannibal had killed both Dolarhyde and Will? Okay, they're finally free from each other. If Dolarhyde had killed him and Hannibal? Finally it was all over. But Dolarhyde killing Hannibal? Oh no, Will couldn't bear to look at it.

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thoughtfulchaos773 · 5 months ago

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I'm thinking of the leak of Claire and Carmy's argument.

I'm wondering if the end of the 3rd season's song "Disarm" by Smashing Pumpkins will give us a clue - at least what the argument will highlight and the theme of season 4.

I think that's the moment- the argument it will reveal the truth of Carmy and Claire's relationship.

If I think about the end of the second season and the song that plays. Half a world away by R.E.M. the lyrics that end with Sydney go it alone foreshadows and tells us about season 3 which starts with Carmy saying I left you alone. (May I had based on that song alone I was about to predict the 3rd season).

But back to the ending of the season 3 song.

Season 3 ends with the song disarm- lyrics:

Disarm you with a smile And cut you like you want me to Cut that little child Inside of me and such a part of you Ooh, the years burn Ooh, the years burn I used to be a little boy So old in my shoes And what I choose is my choice What's a boy supposed to do? The killer in me is the killer in you My love I send this smile over to you

Giving us a hint to the 4th season. This song is quoted by Billy Corgan as:

“... rather then have an angry, angry, angry violent song I’d thought I’d write something beautiful and make them (his parents) realize what tender feelings I have in my heart, and make them feel really bad for treating me like shit.

Disarm’s hard to talk about because people will say to me ‘I listen to that song and I can’t figure out what it’s about.’ It’s like about things that are beyond words. I think you can conjure up images and put together phrases, but it’s a feeling beyond words and for me it has a lot to do with like a sense of loss. Being an adult and looking back and romanticizing a childhood that never happened or went by so quickly in a naive state that you miss it.” — Billy Corgan on Disarm

Season 4 will explore Carmy's issues with Donna, shedding light on Claire and Carmy's relationship and its core truth. It was an idealized version of what he didnt have his mother and one moment will show just how he's trying to workout his relationship with his mom through claire. How he was dating someone who has versions of donna and idealized versions of Donna carmy never got to experience.

This repeat of donna was outlined in the network script but not the show itself. This claire and carmy relationship in the show is insidious. It's not obvious she resembles donna except for her actions and the camera angles and she's also the happy- "nice" idealized version of donna that donna plays but shows her true face eventually.

It's like the song and how he idealizes a childhood- a teenage love that he never had. But realizing in season 4, like the song's synopsis, his choice in changing- in breaking that cycle of relationships that resembles his relationship with Donna.

This song is about him resolving a cycle that he made the mistake of repeating things so he can move on.

My theory on the argument shedding light of claire- it will probably happen on the night of Tiffany's wedding. They either get back together briefly, so he's Claire's plus one – probably one date to try it again – or he's Richie's plus one.

This show loves parrallels- the argument between claire-carmy-richie will resemble this scene:

Donna yelling- Carmy dealing with her anger- all of it with Richie in the middle just watching not cutting in- but who knows maybe he has changed and will step in when Claire argue with carmy- listening to disarm it's about breakin cycles- changing and Richie will do the thing he's never done with Carmy he's going to stop the argument from escalating or at least he'll try to.

Another clue of a possible parrallel: we get clues throughout the episode fishes that donna is connected to claire. Keep in mind, after the scene with Donna yelling at Carmy to move the pot, we dive into Claire—an idealized relationship Carmy never had.

After the scene with Carmy freaking out about Claire, Richie tells Tiffany about hooking Carmy up. Tiffany is surprised because from what she knows of Claire, she's so nice.

Let's talk more about that nice thing that tiffany says...because it appears through 2x06 fishes.

With the berzattos. Things and people just can't be nice. The berzattos are both kind and agressive. If claire is a bearzatto- then she has the same traits in that household. Probably being nice is not what Claire is- not fully at least.

Why this will happen the night of tiffanys wedding? Because tiffany and richie talk about claire and carmy.

And all tiffany knows is what claire said about the situation.

There's going to be another theme similar to seasons 2 and 3, where Richie and Tiffany are the ones discussing or observing Claire and Carmy's relationship with the awareness of repeating cycles. But it's not just Carmy repeating the cycle of being like Donna; it's also his relationships resembling Claire mirroring Donna.

Because from the conversation with Tiffany and what she was told about Carmy, Claire throws pity parties like Donna.

Sorry, but Claire is having a pity party over what Carmy said while he was having an existential crisis in the fridge.

Claire annoyed with the question are you okay? Yeah similarities as it's been discussed here.

Now that Carmy has faced Chef David, as Jimmy mentioned, he has to confront it head-on. Carmy will begin to see the reality and let go of the idealized versions of his mother. He will see the truth about their relationship, which will lead him to end things that no longer serve him.

Apologizing to those he's hurt the right way carmy is going to be able to smile and show the tenderness in his heart. He'll have the courage to change and no longer carry things and people from his mother. He'll break a cycle.

Now if that argument is about syd? About carmy lying - about not doing anything with sydney?

The climax of the argument: Clairebear is going to try to make Carmy say the words "I love you" just to prove something. just as Donna makes him say the words..

Remember Donna is coming to the wedding too. Both Claire and Donna he'll have to face them, and Claire and Donna being in the same room together will make the resemblance even more obvious.

We shall seee. What a mess.

Tagging: @currymanganese @whenmemorydies @turbulenthandholding @moodyeucalyptus @vacationship @fresaton @vacationship

#you get what I'm saying? we're not done with this clairebear thing #something something about psychology and being attracted to people that resemble your caregivers #this is what the show is saying...imo donna has energy like claire. another mother figure in his life- chef terry has energy that's sydneys #because that's the love you onew #or you create idealized versions of people #carmy x sydney #the bear #anti clairebear #ish #sydcarmy #check another similarity- andrea insists with carmy next time he sees her call her andrea #basically stop resolving your life around work #get to know people be personable with sydney. live my guy!#because like chef terry and syd and richie and mikey- they know you do this for the people #anyways time for carmy to surround himself with people that make him better #you make me better at this #break the cycle and be tender

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tsukinoakume · 1 year ago

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RW&RB MovieAlex vrs BookAlex: A Rant

I'm late to the party on Red, White, and Royal Blue for a dumb reason and now I'm obsessed with it. OMG I WAS SO WRONG.

I love the book. I love the movie. I also love the difference between them that I find myself obsessing over: the lack of June.

I love June. I'm also not mad that they removed her from the movie, because I honestly don't think they had the time to do her justice. The important thing is that when they removed her, they split her personality and scenes between Nora and Alex. And the result is fascinating.

Combining June with Alex gives us a calmer, more emotionally mature, competent version of Alex. He is definitely not the hot mess that BookAlex is. (Don't get me wrong here: BookAlex is my favorite character.) But now it's implied that MovieAlex is better at keeping his temper, handles his shit without being micromanaged, advocates for himself more, and I'm pretty sure the speech he gives is his own. Probably with help, but still. Also not having divorced parents means MovieAlex doesn't have BookAlex's abandonment issues. It's never said that his parents' relationship is perfect, but it's implied that he's had a stable family background. MovieAlex still has flaws and he's not Nora Levels of Competency, but he's definitely a lot more balanced. And this actually changes his relationship with Henry, just a little.

Namely in reference to my two favorite scenes:

1) Storming the Castle.

BookAlex is a ball of rage in this scene, and it's GLORIOUS. Yelling at the windows, aggressively dripping everywhere trying to ruin the rugs, making rude comments about Henry's ancestors. He is defiant. He yells, Henry yells back. It ends in tears, but there's a lot of anger.

MovieAlex by contrast is quieter, more hurt. He hardly yells at all. (I rewatched this scene like 20 times for Repeat to be sure.) He's determined, and he doesn't back down, but you get to see that split second of fear in his eyes that Henry is asking him to leave. There's a lot more emotion and tears in this version. It's ... sweeter isn't the right word. Bittersweet, maybe.

Downside: The lack of transition in the morning from the book. I miss Alex expecting to be dumped, and Henry realizing he doesn't want Phillip's life before deliberately making the choice to be with Alex. Also the comment on Alex's hair, which made me giggle.

2) The Museum Scene

I know a lot of people are disappointed with this scene, and I feel the need to argue about why it's brilliant the way it is.

In the book, they go to the museum because Henry has made his choice, and now he's showing one of his favorite places to Alex. He's the one who brings up the music. He chooses to fulfill his fantasy with Alex there, and he chooses to play a song that embodies the romanticism of their situation, about being in love and not being able to let anyone else know. Your Song.

In the movie, they go to the museum when Henry's still trying to decide if this is something he can have, and he's sharing a part of himself with Alex when he talks about his fantasy. Alex is the one who chooses to fufill it, so of course he chooses a different song. For him, it's a song about how easy it is to love Henry. I Can't Help Falling In Love With You.

I also love that they changed Henry giving the ring to Alex to Alex giving Henry his key in return. I love the symbolism of Alex keeping Henry's ring safe for him, of their two homes side by side. But I also love the idea of exchanging parts of themselves. I love that they have those pieces of each other when they're separated and the emails are exposed.

The book tells the story better overall because it has the time to, and the bickering and friendship between the boys is everything. The movie makes me melt over the flirting and affection between them. I can't pick one over the other because both versions of this story are wonderful.

But emotionally mature MovieAlex and how soft he is with Henry, making sure Henry's taken care of? I am WEAK for that.

#Doing this here instead of my author's notes #I have a lot of feelings about red white and royal blue okay?#movie versus book #both both is good #emotionally competent Alex FTW #red white and royal blue

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lvrhughes · 1 year ago

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Not If? | A. Xhekaj

pairing: Arber Xhekaj x fem!reader

summary: The team had made bets on when you and Arber would kiss and it was finally the night they ended.

warnings: none? slut shaming barely?

word count: 1k

not my gif!

It was like the minute you met Arber everything clicked. The two of you became inseparable, it was as if the two of you were attached at the hip.

He was quick to introduce you to the team, warning them even quicker that you were so very off limits. And the team saw that quickly, making a bet (a month after Arber brought you in once) about when the two of you would kiss.

“So when are we gonna see Squirt again?” Cole played, nudging Arber’s shoulder as he walked past him in the locker room.

“You can’t call her that, you’re barely taller than her.” Arber rolled his eyes, returning to taking his gear off.

“Okay well, ouch, I am taller than her and I miss seeing your girl.” Cole shrugged, taking his spot in the locker room.

“She’s not my girl.” Arber mumbled, getting more aggressive with his movements.

“She basically is, but whatever, bring her out for the team drinks tonight?”

“Fine. Only if she wants.” arber agreed, looking to Cole to ensure he understood.

Arber was quick leaving, running out to the parking lot with his stuff before everyone else. Quickly headed to your car where you sat waiting for him.

“Hi Arbs.” You grinned as he got in your car, leaning over the console to touch you, his arms wrapping around you best he could.

“Hi Squirt.” He grinned.

“Told you not to call me that!” You giggled, holding his hand as he got situated before leaving the parking lot.

“Come on, it’s perfect, you're tiny just like that turtle!” He laughed, his body shaking. He loved thinking back to the first time he let you choose a movie to watch, you chose Finding Nemo and declared how adorable you thought the turtles were.

You just shook your head, smiling at the tall defenceman who sat in your passenger seat. The smug smile on his face as you left the parking lot.

“Oh yeah, it’s team drinks tonight and Cole asked me to invite you. Apparently he misses you.” Arber rolled his eyes while repeating it, making you laugh.

“I’d love to come.”

“You came!” Cole was the first to notice you, running around Arber to reach you, wrapping his arms around you.

“Hi Coley.” You grinned, hugging him back while Arber stood beside, a glare on his face.

“Give my Squirt back.” Arber grumbled, pushing Cole away from you within a minute.

“Hey, you can share.” Cole complained, returning to the table while you and Arber followed.

The team huddled around the table, sat in the corner of the bar. The table was filled with opened drinks, a few phones littered the scene and many, many chairs scattered around the table.

“Arber brought her!” Nick informed his team, meaning a round of cheers while a few others got up to hug you.

“It’s like you love her more than me.” Arber mocked hurt, his hand on his heart with a mocking expression.

“We do.” Juraj answered, wrapping his arms around you as you laughed.

The fake frown littering his face as you returned to Arber’s arms, his arms immediately wrapping around you again. Keeping your body pressed against his as he sat down beside his team, Juraj on his left and Cole on his right while you sat in his lap.

“‘M going to get drinks.” You informed him, getting off his lap with a kiss on the cheek, him smiling and nodding.

You had Arber’s order memorized, walking up to the bartender and repeating both of yours orders. Handing the bartender Arbers card, like he’d always made you, ensuring you could never pay for your own drinks.

“Hey pretty lady.” A rough voice was heard behind you, pretending to not know he was speaking to you, you faced the bartender still. “Usually when someone speaks to you, you turn.” The man complained, his hand landing on your shoulder to turn your body towards him.

“Hey-” The man was on the ground holding his nose.

“Arber!” You gasped, reaching for him as he shook his hand, wiping the blood from the man off. He looked up, walking into your grasp before leading you back to the table.

“I can’t believe you just did that.” You mumbled, Arber pulling you back into his lap as he sat.

“He called you a slut I don’t know what else you could’ve thought I’d do.” He shrugged, pressing a kiss to the side of your head as you stared at him.

“He also called me your girl.”

“And?Aren’t you?” He looked at you, seeing how you’d react.

“You never asked.”

“Okay then I’m asking now, you’ll be my girl?”

Nodding in reply, leaning to kiss his cheek. He moved, his hand coming up to cup your cheek as he kissed you, encouraging you to run your hands through his hair.

“You owe me $20, Nick!” Cole’s yell encourages you to break away from Arber, looking at him in confusion.

“Oh yeah,” Cole started, laughing before continuing. “We all have bets on when you guys are going to kiss.”

“Not if?” Arber asks, his arms still tightly wrapped around your body.

“We all knew it was going to happen dude.”

Arber laughed at the deadpanned look on Cole’s face, Nick coming behind to look at Cole.

“What are you talking about?” Nick speaks, earning Cole to point at the two of you.

“They kissed!” He answered, Nick rolling his eyes behind him.

“Where’s your proof?”

“You never said there had to be proof!”

“They’re so stupid.” Arber whispered in your ear, pressing kisses down your neck as you giggled.

“Look, see he’s kissing her right now.” Cole pointed, trying to get the money from his captain.

“Fine ugh.” Nick groaned, shoving a 20 dollar bill at Cole, watching a smile grow on the younger boy's face.

“I won!” He cheered, getting up to collect more money from other teammates.

You laughed, leaning back into Arber before kissing him once more. Feeling his body relax into the kiss, his hands holding your body against his whiles yours traveled through his hair.

“I love doing that.” Arber mumbled against your lips, earning a smile as you leaned into him again.

#mads writings!#arber xhekaj #arber xhekaj imagine #arber xhekaj x reader #montreal canadiens #nhl imagine #nhl oneshot #mads' requests💗

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a-confused-spoon · 6 months ago

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TDP s6: Soren, Viren and missing the point (2/2)

(jesus christ did I write a lot for this one...)

SPOILERS FOR THE DRAGON PRINCE S6!

*sigh*

I want to make a little disclaimer here: my feelings towards Viren were always a bit mixed- I loved the writing of him, but I loved to see him suffer more.

I would have been fine with him dying just as well as living, even if I didn’t love how quick his flip was in s4 (particularly ep2), the same way I’m not in love with how the most recent season seems to gloss over the weight of what the man did in book 1, 2 and 3, even in the scenes where he tries to take accountability: it’s not just the use of dark magic, misleading Claudia or the mistreatment Soren; he got 2 rulers killed, forced a fiery-transformation spell on thousands of soldiers who didn’t want to partake in it, was willing to put an egg before his son’s life, sealed the souls of people in coins etc.

Even if his redemption had continued (as in, had he kept breathing), I personally would have preferred for him to not get a happily forever after with his family, but something more of a "open ending" or whatnot.

However

I can't shake this feeling that The Mystery of Aaravos has a tendency of prioritizing very well-built and executed single scenes with intense emotion over overarching thematic consistency and overall character growth (the number of shenanigans that amounts to nothing in said two regards being exhibit A, but of course those two things don't exclude the other), and while it's a MASSIVE improvement over book 4 and 5, book 6 still has its issues.

While indeed apologizing to who he has hurt isn’t nearly enough for his journey to be (nor feel) “complete”, it’s also true that Viren isn’t given the possibility to do much else to begin with, despite being the first (and so far only) villain to do a complete 180 and check all the boxes of the ‘big no-no’ list the story presents us with when it comes to morality and/or ethics.

I want to explain my point of view the best way I possibly can, so stick with me for a minute:

The characters of the series (or, well, those who don’t belong to the cosmos) exist in a historical context led by a narrative of power that chains them to a never-ending cycle of violence; the use of dark magic plays a big role in said cycle, not only as an active part of it from the human side, but also because the very practice is on its own an incentive to use it more and more frequently, which is a very similar relationship people have with power in general.

What the “good guys” of the story do, as a matter of fact, is break the cycle by putting an end to the narrative of power and replacing it with one of love, ‘cause as we learn in book 2, real strength means being able to choose love, vulnerability and forgiveness, even if that’s not what they’ve been taught all their lives. Only then they can break free of the chains of history; additionally, for said history to not repeat itself, dark magic needs to be abandoned, even in tough circumstances (unless Sol Regem pulls up in Katolis, but I digress) given the detrimental effects on the long run- and with Xadia and humanity at peace with one another and ideally living in harmony, it wouldn’t be needed at all.

Therefore, the list of ‘big no-no’ here is: don’t do dark magic, don’t pursuit power as opposed to love, don’t let history define your perception of the world.

All the “bad guys” of the story are either unwilling or unable to do one or more of those things: Karim can’t for the life of him look past history, Claudia isn’t able to give up dark magic (for now, at least not without guidance), Finnegrin had no intention of giving up the power he held over his crew- and Aaravos deliberately chose to find purpose in the immediate anger he felt during Leola’s trial (consequently engaging in the centuries old cycle of violence in all its ugliness), instead of giving in to the love he has for his daughter and pass away alongside her, resulting in Leola being left alone and scared throughout the horrible process (and also the whole world going through some crazy shit).

Then there’s Viren, who used to rely on dark magic (unlike Karim), pursue power (unlike Claudia) and look at things through the lenses of history (unlike Finnegrin), so he was a bad guy in all possible aspects.

Eventually though, he manages to successfully give up dark magic and choose love over power and refuse the chains of history (as shown both in his relationship with Terry and his willingness to serve King Ezran), with no expectations of mercy or forgiveness... and literally nothing comes of it because the other characters don’t give him the possibility to act on any of said changes, aside from doing one thing that gets him killed.

So it’s “we gain nothing if we don’t give the chance to learn and grow” (or whatever Amaya said in s4) until...? It's "it's never too late if you quit" or whatever Rayla says in ep3 unless...?

I’d love to agree on the “it’s too late” argument, but aside it going against the very principle of the story, even the awful things he did that I mentioned don’t really matter by the time s6 ends: Lain and Tiadrin are happly together and got to say goodbye to their daughter, and she herself chose to save Runaan instead; the fiery-transformation turns out to be temporary, no one seems to even remember that Eveneere and Del Bar exist etc. The only thing that still has an effect is Lux Aurea becoming unhabitable, yet the only character who gives some weight to said tragedy is portrayed as an idiotic bitter nobody (aka Karim) who should just look past it and take a chance on the elven-human camp. So exactly how am I supposed to care? *

I already talked extensively about the theme of forgiveness in part 1 of this essay (if I can call it that), but the point is that the story shouldn't pick and choose who gets rewarded and understood when acting according to the moral of the story and who doesn't even get a chance at getting a second chance while trying to do the exact same thing, not when the very thematic premise of said story automatically puts EVERYONE into perspective- because if it's the lies of history that chain them to a narrative of power, misleading them, and those started way before the characters were even born, then the conversation unfortunately but necessarily needs to include the perpetrators of violence too; they too were misled, therefore they too can unlearn what they've been taught (which Viren does) and should get a chance to really live a life spent on being a better person, not because they may “deserve it” or because it might not be "too late", but simply because they have the CAPACITY to do good, if they choose to.

A show that really nails this point (to me) is She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, which frankly I'm not even that big of a fan of... speaking of which, if Viren was always meant to die sacrificing himself without no one's recognition, it probably would have been better for him to pull a Shadow Weaver ftom the beginning.

(I don't mean this as a comparison, it's just a way for me to lay down all the elements that I belive ultimately don't work or don't help)

For those who aren’t familiar (MAJOR SPOILERS), Shadow Weaver in She-Ra is for the most part what a lot of Viren haters think Viren is in The Dragon Prince: a magic user that loves power, traumatizing the children she grows and nothing else. She doesn’t even have a greater good she intensely believes in to explain her actions and behaviors like Viren does- she’s just a massive bitch. And she doesn’t really grow or learn during the series, it’s just that at some point hanging around the good guys becomes more convenient for her... if I’m not mistaken, she doesn’t even do much unless someone comes to her spontaneously, aside gardening. At no point in time she becomes really trust worthy or good, and it’s always looming in the air whether or not she’s even beginning to be, or will ever be for that matter.

This goes on for like, 3 seasons, until at the very end- and I mean the very end (like, last episode very end) she does one good thing, sacrificing herself to save the two girls she abused the most throughout the series, which leads to her death.

What really sells the scene (leaving out the music, the animation, the dialogue, the voice acting- all of it is just *chef’s kiss*), it’s the fact that:

Her final words to Catra, who she abused the most, really feel like they put a period at the end of a sentence; it feels like closure, you feel that both her and Adora can now move on;

It’s a deliberate choice, because she had the option of staying safe and not do it, and still did;

She dies at peace with herself, and seemingly proud of herself for making that good action too;

Her death isn't the conclusion of an arc nor it comes out of nowhere, because of the general uncertainty regarding her character that precedes that moment

I talked about closure and 'moving on' in the first part of this essay when talking about Soren (which I'm now realizing was a lot shorter, lol), so I’ll move on to everything else.

The point of him dying can’t be about being selfless, because Viren always was selfless for what he thought was right: he was willing to swap bodies with Harrow, he went back to fight Avazandum when the Queens of Duren went to face the dragon alone, when Aaravos tells him he might die going in Lux Aurea he went anyways etc. Not to mention how Soren, of all people, asks him to do dark magic, of all things, so that he can… help… people… mh, now where have I heard this before? I’m sorry- wasn’t using dark magic for the sake of protecting humanity literally what got most problems started? The source of so much conflict and pain and death? A practice that wasn’t worth doing due to the detrimental effects on the long run, even when if people were going through tough times? Literally what Viren did and received a lot of shit for when he was a full-on villain? By all means, if you find it poetic, that’s great! In my opinion it’s a bit weird: if the show wants to make a point, then it should stick to it;

Viren's literally a shell of his former self, from the very moment he steps into the castle. Sure, knowing about Claudia’s state and the part he played in it wouldn’t make anyone sleep at night, but to have him so desperate, unseen and unheard once he finally picks a path "of truth" as opposed to one of darkness really wasn’t... the best. Like, my own bias against the “redeemed character dying/character searching redemption dying before getting to the end of it” trope aside, not even while dying he seems to reach some kind of inner peace. And when Soren comes into his cell, even then, when it’s his chance to prove that he is committed to this new life path he’s still unsure and scared- Soren had to insist for Viren to step in and help. As if he didn’t really know what to do with himself;

I didn’t hope Viren could build a better life for himself because the idea felt right to me, but because for two whole seasons and a half that’s the direction his character was taking, and the fact that his journey ultimately doesn’t come to a proper end isn’t even drìirectly on him just pisses me off. So much time spent on showing Viren’s progress for what feels like nothing... if not setting up Claudia to be Aaravos's new daughter and giving Soren even more trauma to deal with :D

I didn't want Viren to receive a mere slap on the wrist of course, but I also didn't want his journey to be... this. It feels incomplete, partial, and we didn't even get the final conversation he has with Soren about sacrificing his own heart instead of his son's before saying goodbye- which may have single handedly fixed most of what I said (in part 1 more than here, but still).

[ edit: I’m adding this part because I’m only now thinking about this, and I believe it’s worth mentioning.

As I said at the beginning, I do take issue with how Viren’s journey only considers the damage he made on an interpersonal level as opposed to what he caused on a macro-scale. Had his progress continued only with what the second act of the show bothered to explore so far, I’d still have many complaints, just of different nature.

Because of what I mentioned here though (*) and, again, after two seasons and a half of giving all the impressions that there was a light at the end of the tunnel for him after all, I think that it would have been nice for said things to at least be acknowledged once he got back to Katolis, instead of just making a vague matter of deserving or not deserving mercy, as this is the very logic that keeps cycles of violence going. I do know that’s what they are referring to of course, but I still think it should have been an actual part of the conversation; I briefly mentioned this in part 1/2: I would’ve loved for Soren to be the one to call him out on it, especially the ‘leaving Claudia behind’ bit, in a “You can fool yourself into thinking that you’ve changed, but you can’t fool me, not anymore” fashion of sorts.

This still doesn’t mean that a redemption was impossible to begin with imo. I think that there might be a common assumption that redeeming a character means having them join the main team, which isn’t always the case, it just happens to be the most recurring one.

Idealistically, what I think could have been an ‘okay’ solution (I am talking only in utopistic terms here, though I don’t think it would’ve been impossible to pull off in the actual show- but it would have been admittedly very difficult considering the number of episodes per season) would have been for 2 episodes to be mostly focused on choosing how to go about it:

The first one having the main team arguing with each other before coming to the agreement of sticking to their principles despite not liking the situation one bit (but you know, had it been an easy choice then the efforts at peace would’ve started a lot sooner than the actual events of the show);

The second where the pentarchy, the Sunfire Queen and the Dragon Queen have a meeting, so that they can all have their say on the matter, given that they too were directly or indirectly affected by the man; the meeting is full of tension, there’s shouting, there’s calling each other ‘traitors’ and ‘hypocrites’- generally it really puts to the test how much of the world really is committed to the cause and how much of it isn’t ready to move on, but ultimately they begrudgingly come to the conclusion that there’s obviously a series of restrictions that need to be imposed on the man, while still not completely preventing him from doing his part if he truly means to prove his change. Things like: he cannot put foot into Xadia without the surveillance of dragons (preferably Phyrrah plus a couple more) and/or maybe the drake tamers of s4 lead by Rayla (who Viren is terrified by, so she’s perfect for the job), and when he’s in the human side of the land he still must be guarded 24/7 by at least 5 trained guards; he must find a spell to try to undo the corruption of Lux Aurea, but he’s not allowed to touch any source of magic without being openly granted the possibility to by Callum (who’s now in a higher position); anything he might suggest will be discussed among the council etc… how much of this changes in the course of time and how much people are willing to trust him can either change or not change, depending on whatever follows (even if this list is just hypothetical).

Also, in light of this very recent interview:

I want to be very clear: all I’m saying in these two posts is limited to the immediate effect of s6, and if the following season (or, hopefully, seasons) manages to handle things in such a way that it’ll make me eat my words, I’ll be unbelievably happy. This show means so much to me, and I’m only critical of it only because I feel like the second act of the story doesn’t do quite justice to all that the first one laid out: TDP used to be a hyper-fixation for me and it was the saving grace that got me out of the depression loop after Voltron’s ending, so anything that can get me back into that level on investment will make me cry happy tears.

This being said

I do wonder what the whole point of Viren’s journey of this season and the prior two was if the character is deemed irredeemable by the creators themselves, especially since Soren doesn’t get closure, Claudia only gets more trauma, and Viren doesn’t even die somewhat proud knowing that he did what he could manage to in the little time he had in Katolis after so long (as I said earlier), so no one gets much out of it if not more angst… which is always welcomed, if done with a valid point.

If said purpose was just so that his passing could influence his children’s arcs and therefore being there in function of other characters, the entire thing in retrospect feels like a bit of a waste of time, given that the same exact outcome could have been achieved without him being around in this last season at all: just have Claudia come back home to figure what to do next instead of seeing her dad again; she even has the Sunfire scepter thingie to do the spell from s3, so no one needs to die of poorly executed surgery. And then she can just, find the pearl and cave to Aaravos’s temptation, as he does claim he can revive him again anyways. That, plus I’m dying to have Claudia and her brother talk again after in s4 ☹.

…so yeah, like, on a scale from a VLD Lotor frustration to an MLB Chloe Bourgeois frustration, I’m sort of in the middle with Viren. But I do like that there’s a lot of conversation on the topic ]

CONCLUSION: Despite everything, s6 is the first season I actually enjoyed since s3, though it is still not quite at the same level to me, and while I have my problems with it and I'm very saddend that the Viren and Soren thing is among those, I'm acutally very happy that a lot of people enjoy it and that the fandom is ecstatic. It just wasn't for me- but I still had a fun time writing this two parter :)

Thanks to anyone who got 'till the end of this, I really appreciate it! <3

#the dragon prince #tdp viren #redemption #the mystery of aaravos #continue the saga #tdp s6 spoilers #tdp mystery of aaravos #viren #tdp season 6 #she ra #short essay

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autisticlancemcclain · 1 year ago

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fic rec friday 38

hello and welcome to fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics.

only the dead have seen the end of war by @kartoffxl [MCD]

Lance must have seen something in Keith’s face, because his expression crumpled in anguish. “You… You love me back.” He put his head in his hands. “Oh my god. You loved me. You love me. This—This is so fucked up.” “Lance, I—” “Tell me I’m wrong.” There were tears in his eyes. “Tell me we didn’t just waste all those years being cowards.” Keith clenched his fists at his sides, still reeling from the whiplash of what he had just heard earlier. This can’t be happening. “Say it!” Lance pressed. “Say you don’t love me.” Please, his eyes begged. Keith and Lance finally figure out that they’re absolutely, undeniably, embarrassingly in love with each other, just not exactly in the best of circumstances.

okay so. this is. technically. one of the meaner fics im reccing. HOWEVER. it is gaspingly unbelievably beautifully and painfully written. even the summary kills me -- say you dont love me. im begging you. im begging you to lie to me right now. as we lay dying im begging you to have mercy on me and let me believe i didnt have a chance for beauty with you. im begging you to let me die with one regret instead of millions. please. please dont let me die being loved by you. LIKE WHAT

2. Toast to Freedom by @icypantherwrites

Keith is used to more than his fair share of dark looks. What he’s not used to is seeing those looks directed at Lance for no reason that he can determine and it’s making something uneasy settle in his stomach and the heavy press of the mantle of leader weigh even heavier as he should be doing something about it but he doesn’t know what. But causing a scene will upset the alliance they need and so Keith chooses to wait it out, to address it after the feast. He should never have waited.

will never ever in my life get over to 'i drank your poison because no suffering would be worse than watching it on you' not ever. it is always so so everything. and NO ONE does it like icy panther

3. Disjointed Soul by @icypantherwrites

Lance falls victim to a Soul Leecher, a dark spirit that is drawn to disjointed souls to steal them for itself. The Paladins must go into Lance's very soul to save him, uncovering truths about themselves and Lance in the process. Time is of the essence before Lance is lost forever. Good thing they have such helpful, adorable soul guides.

"Hi there baby Lance," Hunk greeted. "Ohwah," Lance burbled back. "¡Ohwah!" "Ohwah?" Pidge repeated. "I think he's saying "hola,'" Hunk grinned. "You know, "hello" in Spanish. Hola, baby Lance." "¡Ohwah! ¡Ohwah!"

this is one of THEEEE original insecure lance fics fr like it was the BLUEPRINT. 2018 there wasnt a langst loving soul who hadnt read this at least twice. its not too long for my dears w shoddy attention spans but its long enough to have quite a bit of substance!! team as family with communication and lance at the centre of it. what more do u want

4. Sleep Well, My Son by @icypantherwrites

A tiny accident becomes literal when Lance is turned into a child with no recollection from his older self. Coran has hopes the effects will be relatively short-term, but in the meantime he has a scared child that needs both reassurance and care. And while Coran might not have had the chance to be a father… he feels like one now.

look i love a good de aged lance fic and obviously when i was making these bookmarks i was scrolling my way thru the tag. and this one is especially amazing bc it is coran centred! this is a coran fic! this is a fic about quiet grief in the life you never got to live and acceptance for the life you have now and love for the people life has brought you!! it is about coran finding family through people who so desperately need it!! it is everything!!

5. Amigos by @icypantherwrites

A dangerous mission becomes even moreso when Lance is turned into a child with no recollection of his older self in the middle of it. Keith has never been good with kids and that certainly isn’t going to change now. Somehow though he’s got to convince Lance — who doesn’t speak a word of English and is staring at Keith with too wide, too scared of eyes — to come with him, get them both out of the Galran base now crawling with sentries alive, and then, assuming they get that far, figure out how to change Lance back.

shut up about the repeated author shut up about the same trope shut up about the. okay. i am a simple creature. i am annoying. i like to sit on my little armchair and open my little phone and read the same thing a million times. there is a Way to read fic and that way is to click on and scroll through a tag until you find a fic you like then scroll through that author and then go back to the tag and rinse and repeat. besides this fic is amazing okay i love klance but we rarely get platonic klance and its GOOD okay

that’s it for today!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!

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shsy7573 · 1 year ago

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Random Lucifer (Hazbin Hotel) Character/Song Analysis Kinda Thing… I Guess

Okay, so yeah, Luci has 100% taken over this page. So what? I’m not obsessed, you are.

Anyway, I’ve been listening to “More Than Anything” on repeat since it dropped, and like a lot of the fandom I tear up every single time… but unlike a lot of the fandom, it’s not because of the sweet father-daughter moment (which, don’t get me wrong, doesn’t help the situation because it’s just so damn wholesome).

No, what gets me is how, just through a couple subtle moments, the show is able to convey just how absolutely shattered Luci is as a character. And, you know, because he’s my favourite, bestest, snek-baby-duck-boy, it makes me a little emotional…

So now you’re all gonna hear about what goes through my mind every time I listen to it. YAY!

“Charlie! You don’t understand, Heaven never listens. They didn’t listen to me. They won’t listen to you!” / “You don’t know that—” / “I do!”

It starts before the song even truly begins. When I’m listening, it’s usually these first few lines that grab my attention. I end up replaying the first 4-5 seconds of the song over and over again because the pain in that “I do” is so fucking good! (And because I like to suffer apparently cuz I end up sad. Life of an angst lover I guess).

It’s the first time we see him with actual tears in his eyes. The raw delivery of that line is so attention grabbing, and manages to say so much in such little words.

I think the reason this particular scene tickles my brain so much is because it’s the breaking point for his character in a way. I am, and always will be, a sucker for moments where a character’s walls finally come down, and we get to see what’s been festering inside. When their deepest thoughts and how much they’re hurting are revealed. The entire song is what that is for Lucifer, starting with these two words right here. I truly cannot put into words just how much my breath is taken away by Jeremy’s delivery of this line. I cannot articulate how much I love it, and how important it is for Luci’s character. it just hits so deep and so right for me and I love it.

Lucifer isn’t just saying that he knows Heaven isn’t going to care about her plan (I don’t think anyone thought that’s all he was saying but whatever). He is saying that he knows what Heaven does to dreamers. He knows what they’ll do because he has already been there, and it destroyed him. They took his ideas that they saw as too outlandish, and they squashed them. Cast him aside. And he paid the price for it when he went bashing their back and did his own thing anyway.

Luci is a broken dreamer. Throughout the entire episode, and the series as a while, we are given very strong hints of this. However, it’s not until this song that we really see it in action. It’s not until these moments that we are able to see past both the veils of “Imposing King of Hell” and “Goofy Guy who’s trying his best but not great at Dadding,” and get a look at how genuinely depressed this man is.

“My dreams were too hard to defend.”

This scene eight here. The more I see it, the more I fall in love with it. Just a great example of ‘show don’t tell.’

He’s talking about having big ideas, he’s talking about giving people a chance and reaching outside the normal, he’s talking about being cast out of Heaven. I just love the parallel he’s drawing between Charlie’s mission, and his own past.

Charlie created the hotel in an attempt to give people who have been seen as lesser to all of Heaven some sort of chance. She is choosing to have faith in them, and to open up opportunities for them to lead a better life.

Lucifer, when he gave Eve the fruit, was taking a chance to allow humanity the chance to have free will. He wanted them to experience everything life had to offer for themselves like angels got to. He offered a chance for them to lead a better life.

He had everything, and he had complete faith that what he was doing was right. All the light and hope of his dreams was right in the palm of his hand. He had so many ideas that he thought, if they were saw through, would make the world a better place.

But it didn’t work out for him.

“And in the end, I won’t lose it all again.”

Now, the first seconds of dialogue may be what I keep rewatching, but this has got to be my favourite visual of the entire song. It’s such powerful imagery, and I fangirl over it every time.

Look at how small he looks in that shot (I know, I know, he’s tiny regardless, but like seriously). He is completely outnumbered, hopelessly overpowered, totally at the mercy of all his Heavenly superiors… and he’s all alone.

He lost everything because he had the gall to dream. It’s not hard to look at the song (and the episode at large, really) and find not only his feelings of being wronged, but also his immense guilt. It shows in how much he hates Sinners. They are basically the worst of what he did, a constant reminder of the day his mistake caused him to lose his home and everything he held dear, and they are all he gets to see. Only being permitted to see your failures for all eternity? No wonder he’s fucking depressed.

The day Heaven cast him out was the day he stopped dreaming. Because dreaming big only leads to pain, failure, and suffering.

“I just don’t want you to be crushed by them like… like I was.”

This next moment is kinda self explanatory and obvious and really doesn’t need any commentary, but I’m gonna talk about it anyway. Because I love it, and I love him, and�� you know… angst. I’ve mentioned my lust for it several times now throughout this post, you really shouldn’t be surprised.

I just feel so bad for him. Lucifer made one mistake. One simple, misguided mistake that ended up introducing evil into the world, and all of Heaven came down on him for it. And, you know what, in the narrative presented by the show, what he did wasn’t that bad. He just wanted to give the world’s newest creations the same freedom angels had, and it backfired horribly. Lucifer, like Charlie, was an idealist who saw the best in people and wanted to help.

And what did he get for his good intentions? Shoved into the cesspool he unintentionally created, and forbidden to ever see anything good that came from his dream.

If I had to guess, Lilith was the only thing keeping his mental health afloat for a long time… and then they had Charlie.

“The tales about your lofty dreams. I’d listen breathlessly, imaging it could be me.”

His daughter became the light of his life. Something that he cherished and indulged more than anything else in the world. To him, she was perfect, and he wanted to do right by her in any way he could.

Lilith told their daughter stories of all her father’s dreams regardless of what he thought of them, and when the little princess came asking him… how could he refuse? How could he refuse her anything?

So he shared them with her. All the tales of grandeur, and fantasies of everything he wished the world could have been. All the dreams he had long since let go.

“And in the end, it’s the view I had of you that show me dreams can be worth fighting for.”

Now, the scene where Lily take’s Charlie away has always been excellent brain fodder for me because of how somewhat ambiguous it is. You could interpret his sadness to have SO MANY meanings. However, I have inevitably decided on two potential head-cannons/theories to share here for what could possibly be going through Snek-King’s head.

One: Lucifer loves his daughter, but he feels estranged and like he’s failed her in some way. She’s such a joy, such a wonder, and in a way it's his fault she’s trapped down here with all of human ties worst. He wasn’t to be close to her, and to make the world perfect for her… but he already feels like he’s failed her in the most unforgivable way. He keeps his distance because part of him doesn’t want her to have a super high of an opinion of him. It’s kind of his depression manifesting, saying that ‘she shouldn’t admire you and your stupid dreams when they’re the reason she’ll never see true light and happiness.’

The angst addict in me likes this one more, but still I’ve got another one that always pops.

Two: He feels like he’s selling her false hope, and he can kind of see the place her innocence is headed. He’s seen the horrors of the world, and he knows the more he indulges her dreams and fantasies, the more she’ll suffer when she sees that’s not what the world is like. He knows from personal experience how much it hurts when your dreams come undone, when you lose hope in the world.

Listening to Charlie’s actual lyrics, she tells him that he was the one who inspired her to dream, that he was right to dream, and that she’s not going to back down. In the song, Luci realises that 1: maybe he didn’t fuck us as badly as he thought and that she actually doesn’t blame him and wants her in his life and/or 2: she has her mother’s willpower, and she’s never going to stop dreaming or let her world be sullied like he did. She’s so much stronger than he was.

So he lets her in.

(Side note… AWWW, look how TINNYY he is! He’s so small. The start contrast in the second image gets me every time)

There’s a bit of symbolism in the song which I ABSOLUTELY adore, and it has to do with the wings. In the flashback, Charlie mentions his “lofty dreams,” when we see the duck, which later transforms to have multiple sets of wings. Later in the song, when Lucifer finally lets her in, he also sprouts those wings.

And I just love this, because I think it acts as the perfect symbolism of him finally opening his mind again. Not just to his daughter, but to the possibility of dreaming in general.

He takes her to a circus, a place filled to the brim with spectacles and thrills, a place where humanities wildest imaginations seem possible.

But even though he’s beginning to open up, and he’s willing to help her in whatever she does, he’s not ‘fixed.’ His depression and self doubt and feelings of hollow emptiness and guilt and apprehension aren’t gone.

And he’s still terrified of seeing her spark go out like his did.

This tiny smile break is so addicting to watch for me. It speaks volumes. Once again, my angst loving heart eats it up every time. It says, “I’m still worried, and there is still so much shit going on in my mind right now about all of this, but I’m here for you.”

And that’s what counts.

Luci’s character showed a lot of colours, and came a long way in this singular episode, but he’s still got a big uphill battle to climb. He still has to come back into his own where dreams are concerned. Maybe he never will, not completely. Realistically, he’ll never go back to the way he was.

But maybe, just maybe, in helping his daughter he’ll find something worth believing in again.

That is, of course, if they decide to give him a character arc beside ‘Dad who is trying and doing better,’ but for that only time will tell.

—

And THAT concludes my rant on the Rubber Ducky Ruler. If you stuck around this long, good for you! I wrote this whole thing on a limb at midnight, and NO I’m not going to go back and edit it because why would I ever want to see all the horrid grammatical and spelling errors I’ve inevitably made.

Maybe I’m off the mark on all of this. Maybe I’m head-cannoning too much. Maybe I’m just trying to suck out every hint of potential angst out of a song that’s supposed to be sweet and wholesome. That’s for you to decide. But for me, I’ve decided that I’m satisfied with this analysis. In the end, I just needed to express all the thoughts bumbling around in my head SOMEWHERE before I exploded, and unfortunately, I feel like I’ve run all my friends dry talking about this baby to them, so now it’s your turn. But, anyways, I think that about wraps things up. It’s time to go to bed.

Farewell, stay hydrated, and have a lovely rest of your day/night :)

#hazbin hotel lucifer #lucifer hazbin hotel #hazbin lucifer #lucifer #character analysis #kind of #bless my angst loving heart #I just had to talk about him

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unordinary-diary · 6 months ago

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Blyke and John: Parallel Characters

I’ve written multiple entries about this,

[x] [x] [x]

But I’m back to make a comprehensive analysis about the glaring similarities between these two. I’ll try not to repeat myself here.

‼️SPOILER WARNING for the whole series‼️ but this mostly focuses on the story before John’s suspension.

Firstly, this scene:

ch. 121

This conversation takes place near the beginning of the Joker arc. It’s after John targets Zeke, after he targets Juni, and the day before he goes after Seraphina’s kidnappers. The timing is important.

“If someone hit your best friend, would you let it slide?”

That question is supposed to remind us what John does to people who hurt Seraphina: hunting them down and sending them to the hospital. Blyke shooting a destructive beam really close to John was an example of a trait they share: they both blow up violently when people mistreat their friends.

John’s downward spiral carries strong themes of hypocrisy. He’s angry at the world, he’s angry at himself, and as a coping mechanism, he chooses to believe that everyone else is as bad as he is. That means that most of the traits he hates others for are the same things he hates about himself. In this scene, Blyke is unintentionally calling out this hypocrisy: “What I did is no different from what you do”.

But Blyke’s just trying to connect with John here, he has no idea what John’s been doing. And John, of course, doesn’t give a shit about what Blyke has to say. This line was here for the audience to notice.

They’re both so similar, but their similarity immediately causes tension between them because, well, John was on the wrong end of Blyke’s protectiveness.

I really love the way this was written— there are so many flashbacks to this scene, but they remember it differently. John remembers the part that hurt him— he’d describe it as “the time that jackass shot a beam at me”. Blyke remembers the part that hurt him, or rather, hurt Remi: “the time that jackass hit Remi for no reason”.

Blyke and John are both hotheaded characters with strong ideals. They’re similar enough that Seraphina points it out:

(ch. 80)

As Blyke grows as a character, he becomes more like John: sticking up for low tiers and speaking out against the injustice in the world. But while Blyke is doing that more, John is going in the opposite direction, until they are fully opposed to each other.

Speaking of Blyke’s character arc, it took me a few rereads to actually understand what part of him changed. His kindness, selflessness, bravery— all of those things were there from the start. Blyke’s character arc was about becoming more aware of his surroundings, and how his carelessness can harm others. Blyke was never malicious, but after X-Rei and integrating more with the school, he becomes aware of people suffering around him and how he unintentionally contributes to it. He becomes less reckless, privy to the flaws in the system he grew up not questioning, and uses his power more responsibly. He even comes up with a more controlled way to wield his ability. The part of Blyke that changes is his maturity.

Part of John’s character arc is also about being careful. It’s not as close of a parallel as other things are, but one of the things that John works on during his redemption arc is holding back. Both of them learn self-control throughout the series, and for John, that means acting early before his emotions spiral out of hand.

Adding onto my first point about the two of them wanting to protect their friends— the fact that they can’t do that makes them both angry and desperate. For most of the story, the “block” that prevents John from protecting Seraphina is in his head. It’s his own trauma that holds him back. The block that prevents Blyke from protecting his friends is, guess what? Also John’s trauma! Parallels abound.

Another thing I noticed in Episode 80 is this:

Notice that when Seraphina says “I’d take that over strength any day,” John is looking at the camera. He’s avoiding Sera’s gaze. Seraphina is saying she prefers honesty over strength. John is very strong, and very dishonest, but Seraphina thinks the opposite because John is so dishonest. John appears to be reflecting on this disconnect.

In relation to this analysis, Seraphina is actually pointing out a major difference between Blyke and John. Beyond that, she’s praising Blyke’s traits, (less strong but very open) above John’s traits, (strong as fuck but a liar with his pants on fire). Furthermore, John really cares what Seraphina thinks of him. Knowing that she would think less of him is the main reason why he spent so much time and effort preventing her from catching his lies.

This leads into my main point here: Blyke is the “goody-two-shoes” version of John. Or, more accurately, the person that John wants to be. Blyke has a clean track record and doesn’t really get into trouble. He is respected and left alone by the school without being hated and feared, he de-escalates conflicts without taking things too far, he doesn’t lose control, he’s someone Seraphina thinks highly of, hell, even his grades are better! Blyke represents everything that John wants to be, and the person that he could have been if he’d gone down a different path.

But, crucially, John is also what Blyke wants to be. Well, not wholly, but his ability? His strength? It’s one of the things John hates about himself, but Blyke wants that strength so desperately that he risks his life for it over and over again.

They’re both desperate to be like each other, even when they hate each other the most. Neither of them have any idea how alike they already are.

I don’t know what Season 3 holds in store for us, but I do hope that John realizes that Blyke embodies who he wants to be, because mutual jealousy would be a very interesting dynamic to explore in my opinion. I also hope that it ends up being something they can bond over, by helping each other accomplish their personal goals. (Blyke being another helper in John’s character arc, and John helping Blyke train.)

A side note: John beat up Blyke four separate times. That’s more than any other character, which is interesting because John’s main rival is supposed to be Arlo. For reference, John has beaten Arlo twice, three times if you count the time when Seraphina intervened, and he only beat him unconscious once. But John beat Blyke to the point of passing out all four times, the worst of which being a shot clean through his chest. (shoulder? Unclear. S1 finale).

It’s odd, isn’t it? Out of everyone, Blyke is the one who John physically hurt the most. John’s only grudge against him is an old memory from episode 33, of an event that didn’t actually harm him. John’s grudge against Arlo is much more serious and again— that’s his main rival. So why is it that he’s so much more violent towards Blyke?

The problem here is that I’ve been thinking about these fights as “John picking on Blyke”. And that’s… kind of true? But while Blyke didn’t start any of these fights, they were all consensual in a way. He didn’t seek to fight John, nor was he ever happy about fighting John, but he was always a willing participant.

(138, 153, 206, & 211)

In three out of these four fights, John didn’t even expect to be fighting Blyke going into it. This is significant because while Arlo is John’s main rival, John absolutely fills that role for Blyke. Blyke’s own agency is what leads to most of these events. The reason, narratively speaking, why they fight so much is not for John’s character, but for Blyke.

For John, his reason for fighting Blyke so much is not narrative but moreso symbolic. John is angry at everyone and everything, but ultimately the person he hates the most is himself. It’s only fitting that the character most like him would bear the brunt of his wrath.

As John is having his positive character arc (suspension and post-suspension), he is becoming more like Blyke, and the two of them reach a point where they’re even more similar than they were at the start of the series.

In the Rowden amusement park, John does start to realize how similar they are:

(249)

Additionally, I want to draw your attention to the parallels between this scene:

Blyke and John’s argument in chapter 249

(which the image limit won’t let me add, scroll until you see red hair.)

And this scene:

Argument in ch. 121 (it’s at the beginning)

Two sides of the same coin.

Furthermore, in the S2 finale, Blyke is shown being taken to Keon. There is an implication that by Season 3, Blyke and John will share Keon-related trauma as well. Despite my pessimistic predictions, I do hope that this is a similarity that can bring them together rather than tear them apart.

#unordinary #I had another point that i had to cut #because it was about the john slaps remi scene #and how like blyke knew he wasn’t gonna miss and hit john by accident but john doesn’t necessarily know that #and that john assumes the worst (blyke was aiming for his head) bc he’s mad #and blyke also assumes the worst (that john hit remi for no reason). But when i was looking for screenshots to back it up #and i was looking for the one panel where john referred to blyke as “that idiotic redhead who tried to blow my brains out”#as proof of john assuming the worst #But then i found it and it doesn’t even say what i thought it said #it says “THREATENED to blow my brains out”#Smh john didn’t even assume the worst. He knew it was jyst a threatening shot even thogh he was mad #And then my whole thing kinda falls apart because blyke assuming the worst is actually just the logical conclusion since he can’t read mind #Like how was he gonna know john was having trauma issues #Yargh okay so i think i cut all the parts that don’t really make sense but it’s late so this is a low quality proofread #Gonna be honest this is NOT structured very well #Theres more to be said about john hating other people for the same reasons he hates himself #and I didn’t quite hit it #but it’s lateeeeeee #something about how Blyke is so similar to john but lacks most of what John hates about himself so John projects his insecurities—#back onto him anyway #Something about in ch 249 when he says something something “because I couldn’t cope with the fact that you guys weren’t actually bad people #Yeah idk im too tired to get into it #blyke unordinary #john unordinary #oh also has something to do with when john says “i may have deserved those classes but they sure as hell don’t” about keon #i think that’s significant #analysis #i have a bad feeling that someone in my notes is gonna purposely misinterpret my “goody two shoes” blyke statement ngl #”did you say that blyke is perfect and john is evil”#like something like that

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mania-sama · 7 months ago

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If you don't mind me asking, who are your top 5 (or top 7) favorite (fictional) characters ever from any media? Why love them?

thanks so much for the ask!! i always love your questions <3

God, this is a hard one. Because I've consumed and fallen in love with so many pieces of media in my life, it's hard for me to tell who exactly my favorite characters are. The pool is just too big to choose from! But I'll try my best regardless!

Also an important note that as I grow older, this list could very well become out-dated very fast. Who knows what I will see or what medias I will consume that will alter my perception of reality?

In no particular order:

Bakugou Katsuki [My Hero Academia] -> THE OG. I REPEAT. THE OG ONLINE OBSESSION. My history with My Hero Academia goes way back on my online persona, when I was a wee lad and experiencing my first online hyperfixation (Warrior Cats not included). I had him as online nickname and profile picture on multiple accounts and instances. I look back and cringe on this era of my life, but I still will not stand for slander on this character. I obsessed over him because he is an incredibly well-written character, with faults, passions, interesting qualities, and an insane amount of character growth that, arguably, rivals Zuko. His character motivations still stand out to me to this day. I quit reading/watching BNHA around the war arc, like right when it finished and Midoriya fled the scene. No particular reason for quitting, I think; I just moved on from that part of my life. But, Bakugou will always stick with me just a little. AND YOU KNOW WHAT. I liked him when everyone else still hated him. I liked him before it was cool to like him. Shout out to 2020-2021 me for being an OG. I'm still a "Ground Zero" truther to this very day.

Percy Jackson [Percy Jackson and the Olympians] -> Anyone that has read the PJO and/or the following series will not be surprised to find him here. He's like Spiderman but better, which is saying a lot because I really, really like Spiderman. Percy Jackson is there for every kid who has ever felt out of place in this world; for every kid who has struggled in succeeding in any aspect of their life; for every kid who grew up in a household different from their peers; for every kid who behaves in ways that other people don't seem to understand. Spiderman was a character created to represent the reader of superhero comics: a teenage white boy. Of course, later iterations of Spiderman come to represent more individuals, but that is not who he was originally. Percy Jackson is a character that comes from a place of necessity. He is a character that represents the reader of PJO: a kid who doesn't quite fit in with the rest, for one reason or another. Percy is funny, ultra-overpowered, relatable, and still gets his happy ending. Nothing more to want in a character, really.

Robbie White | Axe Boy [Identity V] -> My hunter main for Identity V. I don't really know how to explain why I love him so much, and how he has become a character I get emotional over very fast. I seem to find one random character from a game and attach myself to them like a jellyfish. Not only is his backstory devastatingly heartbreaking, he is adorable in all of his animations, standby motions, emotes, etc.. He has carried me to many victories, and he will continue to carry me in every match I play. I literally forced myself to download IDV on my laptop and play a few matches just so I could get his Little Nightmares crossover skin. No matter how far he falls from meta, they can never make me hate you Robbie.

Kugisaki Nobara [Jujutsu Kaisen] -> I had a LOT of internal debate over this. I guess I can't confirm until I leave the fandom, but for right now, she's definitely one of my top favorite characters of all time. I'm considering writing an analysis on her because she is just so good. I have never seen a female character in a piece of media that isn't explicitly feminine embody femininity so well. It actually impresses me to a degree I cannot reasonably tell you. She's just perfect. Everything about her is everything that I want to be as a woman. She's comfortable in her own skin, confident not in a man-ish way, but in a distinctly feminine way. What gives that she wants to feel pretty and strong in a physical way? Who is saying that she can't have both? Not to mention that she's also extremely strategically smart. I love her. I really, really do. Sometimes, I imagine strangling Gege's avatar and it makes me very happy.

Oikawa Tooru [Haikyuu] -> I honest-to-God cannot believe he made it here. I tried so hard to find a character to replace him. I did not want him here out of SPITE. But here he is, somehow, and not replaced by Miles Morales (who, upon reflection, would only be here because I did not want Oikawa to be here. Miles didn't even make my honorable mentions. That is proof enough, I suppose, that Oikawa somehow deserves his spot). I've talked about it before, but I'll reiterate it here: Oikawa is a character that is very, very easy to toy around with. He is THE teenager, and THE adult. You can project pretty much any anxiety or worry onto him and it'll make sense because he's got so many self-worth issues it's laughable. I don't want to spend more time talking about him than he deserves. I am as disappointed as you are that he made this list.

Honorable Mentions:

Razor & Xiao [Genshin Impact] -> They would've made the list if I could've put one above the other for real. Silly whimsical attachment with immense appreciation for the character writing vs serious love for the writing and development of the character beyond words. Simply an impossible choice.

Akabane Karma [Assassination Classroom] -> He was my favorite character of all time at one point in history and is still the inspiration behind my Tiktok nickname (that I may change one day). Unfortunately, it's been a long time since I've watched the anime and I can't remember much of what drew me to Karma in the first place that isn't already achieved in other of my favorite characters. Still, I thought I'd honor him here.

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lullabyes22-blog · 22 days ago

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Hi Lullabyes,

I stumbled onto FnF but read Mal de Mer first — I’m absolutely in love with everything. I discovered both beautiful stories recently and binge read it through because it is so damn good. With a free Zaun rising; has me spinning in a great way!

I don’t think I can articulate just how; without repeating the reviews on tumblr, on Ao3 or anywhere else you’ve posted. It’s incredible and revolutionary. Your take is what Arcane should have been.

Honestly thank you, the lore, world-building, characterisations, the snippets, the playlists, the art, Pinterest inspirations, the gifs and interactions I’ve seen with fellow readers. It’s everything. The Silco-centric stories has me living!!!!

I’m in awe and you are fantastic as a researcher and author. I never thought I’ll enjoy the pairing of Silco and Mel but now it’s like shimmer and I’m hooked. A rare pair indeed but intoxicating so I’ll be rooting forever after for their endgame as my OTP in Arcane (and Silco x OFC too).

I wish Mel and Silco had interacted on screen because that would have something special, added to the beauty that is Season 1 and I think alter “What could have been”.

I’m going to continue enjoying the Melco ride in FnF but can see the writing on the wall, even though I wish they were end game (badly wish they were endgame). Which is why I’m very, very happy that I still have Mal de Mer to obsess over (and its potential future sequel).

Their pull and push, their intellect, all for the compromise and the bridge between them and their two cities. Sapiosexuals hard at work shenanigans!

(I swear it’s not purely down to smut reasons alone. I think they make such a powerful couple, it’s tantalising to imagine the overlaps, variations and games between them as their attention and attractions deepen to something more meaningful. Even if they’re fighting their natures as they go down. It’s heady to think of and that they fall love as this connection grows, against their will initially; then they continue to choose one another and stay together too)

This is part a thank you for everything, your stories and part question on: whether you would consider ever doing more Silco x Mel in future like FnF epic and outside of Mal de Mer.

I hope you enjoy your break and can’t wait for next chapter when you return.

Thank you so much for reading! It really means a lot and I'm so glad you're enjoying the worldbuilding. FnF has been a labor of love and it's so gratifying to know folks are having fun with it<3

It also thrills me to no end that there are people enjoying the Mel x Silco ship. I'd wanted them to interact ever since seeing the way they both maneauvered through the corridors of power in S1, Mel in the light and Silco in the shadows. imo a team-up between these two chessmasters would've been full of delicious mindgames and epic sass.

I love the Silco and Jayce Parley scene in canon, but I think there'd have been a lot more room for fun stuff if Mel was involved, and it's such a shame the series didn't give us that.

As for future Silco x Mel stuff - I'd absolutely love doing a Mel x Silco fic, possibly a Mal de Mer sequel titled At Sea, but atm I'm pretty tied up with other projects, including the plotting for FnF. It's on my radar, tho, so fingers crossed I can get to it one day!

Thank you so much for your lovely comment, I appreciate every word and I'm really glad you're having fun with these rarepairs<3

#arcane #arcane league of legends #forward but never forget/xoxo #arcane silco #silco #asks #forward (never forget)/xoxo #arcane mel #mel medarda #silco x mel #melco #mal de mer

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catcherwrites · 1 month ago

Text

TDP S7E8 Rewatch (feat. my commentary)

I had a lot to say about this, buckle in

Beautifully painted background of Lux Aurea as always

“We have one minute after the spell is complete before the blast destroys Lux Aurea” I can’t believe I forgot that detail, but it makes sense. The sun is a star, so if a sun orb ‘dies,’ one can assume it would also release a nova. Wild that Janai went into this fight knowing she’d lose what was left of her city

Astrid knows star magic? I hope we explore that more in Arc 3

I haven’t reached it yet but I’m already so pumped for Karim’s last, most pathetic hurrah

Karim started talking and Aaravos instantly knew this guy was everything he hated about the Cosmic Order and had to die. Suck it Karim, you were interesting, but awful, and your death was cathartic (IS THIS A KIDS SHOW? PART 1)

Janai losing another family member to Aaravos is awful though

“Let there be dark” add another religious metaphor to the board

The way that Amaya gently holds Janai as they watch Aaravos is such a sweet detail

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TELL US THE ORPHAN QUEEN’S ACTUAL NAME. EZRAN SHOULD KNOW IT, RIGHT?

I can’t tell what exactly was shattering but Rex’s entrance had some cool animation

Yessss we get to see Aaravos fight Rex Igneous? No? He gets bruised a little and does one knock-back blast?

Oh well, I don’t mind getting to see a battle between two archdragons and…never mind, we got a short fight but now Rex is dead. Cool death animation though!

I like how archdragons that die return to their primal source (so to speak). It adds a tragic element to Avizandum’s death since his petrification prevented him from returning to the sky

“Then Aaravos has the sun orb and this is eternal night!” Terry sweetheart…it was daytime a few minutes ago, and now the sun is eclipsed, I’m pretty sure that was obvious

The change in Soren from S4 to S7 is so painful. He started out insistent that he could save everyone (or at least try) despite Rayla telling him otherwise, but now he’s the one telling Terry that “you can’t save everyone”

They just have to get to the top of the Sun Forge to imprison Aaravos…but why? Do you have to be a certain distance from the target to cast the spell? Because I’m pretty sure you could get closer to him from the ground. Oh well, I guess it’s a cool place for a final showdown

Who’s the one with dark eyes that chooses his own end? Avizandum, who remembers who he is and delivers the killing blow, dying in the process? Or Callum, who defies Aaravos and Dark Callum’s expectations and chooses his own destiny?

Hero shot alert!

Hey Ziard is back! Too bad he immediately gets blasted with fire and is never seen from again

It feels very in character that Corvus registers Terry being pulled away and reacts first, and also in character that Soren hardly hesitated before he jumps to their rescue

The first time I watched this episode I had to pause after Stella decapitated that drake. It’s so sudden, brutal, and perfectly in-character for her (IS THIS A KIDS SHOW? PART 2)

Domina Profundis! Now that it’s a 2v2 surely they’ll attack Aaravos right? No…no they’re not and he’s talking again? Fair enough. I suppose Zubeia and Domina already know that attacking him will kill their allies

The whole “no vessel to control” confused me, because they all know Claudia’s a dark mage who is actively working with Aaravos. She could easily become the vessel. Hell, she’d probably let him!

Overall thoughts:

I don’t have much to comment on for the episode itself, given how much of it was an extended action scene. There were some moments of animation and dialogue that were really cool and memorable to me which were great to see again! I went into the season predicting that Zubeia would die, but Karim and Rex were surprises that I am so pleased the team didn’t shy away from. I’ve already gone over my thoughts about Arc 2’s battle scenes in the S7E7 rewatch, so I won’t bother repeating myself again. What I will do instead, is offer some suggestions for how I think sequences like the one in this episode could’ve been improved (i.e., what I try to do when I’m writing)

Fights are high-intensity moments, and your characters are in constant communication with the barrage of environmental stimuli they are experiencing. Each character will respond to that wave of information in a way that is unique to them. Less experienced fighters may freeze or focus so intently on one thing that they ignore others, leaving themselves open for attack. More experienced fighters may register their surrounding faster and play to their strengths. Some people are solo fighters and others are used to fighting in teams, so try to show how that affects their actions in your battle!

For example; Astrid’s likely never been in a fight, so maybe she’s the one circling overhead instead of Rayla, using her star magic to assist where she can. Callum can’t cast spells while his mage wings are up, but we can show him avoiding enemies with advanced flying techniques to show how he’s grown. Rayla, Amaya and Janai are skilled short-ranged warriors who’d be absolutely ploughing their way through as many spirits and corrupted beasts as possible to keep them from reaching Callum. Maybe Terry is hellbent on finding Claudia, which forces Soren and Corvus to peel away from the main group and work together to defend him (as Crownguard would). We don’t really see Pyrrah after Terry, Corvus, and Soren are pulled off her, but she’s always been eager to fight and is a friend of Zubeia’s. To illustrate Pyrrah’s aggressive personality and Aaravos’ power level, perhaps she puts herself between her Queen and Aaravos, pestering him until he swats her away mid-monologue like a fire-breathing fly

All in all, this episode was a little hit or miss for me on its own, since it’s best watched as a two-parter with E9. There are some plot elements that really pleased me, and others that left me with questions - but I’ll hold off until I finish the finale to bring them up

#i really wanted to hear domina talk in this episode (whether it be directed at zubeia or aaravos)#she has such a cool voice #the dragon prince #tdp #tdp s7 #tdp season 7 #continue the saga #give us the saga #greenlight arc 3

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chloe-caulfield94 · 9 months ago

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Bay Max has a talk with Other Max

This is going to be a part of a larger fanfic, so if it piques your interest, stay tuned. It's also quite darker than what I usually write, so be warned.

-----------------------------

Max went back to the scene of her crime. The filthy bathroom corner she had showered with her tears five days prior. The filthy bathroom corner that she had cowered in, waiting for Chloe’s heart to be pierced by a bullet. She touched the fire alarm she was supposed to use to save a life, but she had chosen not to. She turned to walk away and she noticed the moustache and glasses scribbled on the mirror. She walked over and touched the graffiti, repeating her movements from Monday.

“You were right. Something was mocking you. It wasn’t the universe, though. I highly doubt the universe is even aware a bug like you is currently crawling on its skin. It was me. I’ve been mocking you” – Max heard her own voice coming from the mirror. She noticed that her reflection not only wasn’t mirroring her movements, but it was even dressed differently – in her usual grey hoodie and pink t-shirt instead of the black dress she was wearing.

Max furrowed her brows. “You again? You told me to sacrifice Chloe. You told me she wasn’t worth my love and friendship. And that spectacle at the diner? All the townspeople accusing me of murder? Bravo. I especially liked Joyce telling me that I’m taking her away from her family if I don’t sacrifice Chloe. But her family is Chloe! Such a nice touch. How twisted do you have to be to even come up with something like that?”

“Why are you making fun of my tricks? You fell for them. They worked. You did what I told you to do”.

“Yes, you bullied me into killing my own best friend. I did what you told me was the right thing to do. Even though by doing so I killed my soul as well. What more do you want from me?”

Her reflection chuckled. “Bold of you to assume you had a soul to begin with. And our talks have never been about me telling you to do the right thing. Have you considered the possibility that I simply enjoy seeing you squirm?”

“Who … what are you?”

“I’m a part of you that contains all of your self-loathing, self-doubt, guilt and resentment. Or … perhaps I’m a demon sent to torment you. You always listen to Samuel’s talks about spirits roaming around Arcadia Bay. You constantly fall for various ‘woo’ you find on the Internet. You’re functionally an antivaxxer. I’m sure you’re more than capable of believing in demons”.

“So what now? You told me I should sacrifice Chloe and now that I did you’re going to say I shouldn’t have?”

“More or less. I’m always telling you things that make you feel bad. But before you say I’m evil, that’s just what I am. You could say it’s my job. I am a part of you that makes you feel sad. It’s not my fault you let me grow so strong. Stronger than all your other parts put together. You know, the nightmare you had when Chloe was hauling your unconscious body to safety was the first time we met face to face. But it was not the first time you heard my voice. No, for years I whispered in your ear. I told you not to return Chloe’s phone calls. I told you to respond to her texts with the most non-committal nothings under the sun. I told you not to write her letters. I told you not to reach out to her even when you already were in Arcadia Bay. And we both know for a fact you wouldn’t have contacted her, ever, had she not saved your ass in the parking lot, don’t we? And we both know that had you contacted her right after you arrived in town, six weeks before she was murdered, her fate would’ve turned out differently and she wouldn’t have found herself on the receiving end of Nathan’s gun. No Storm, no dead best friend, had you just had the guts to reach out to her, you coward. Your cowardice killed people. You could only choose who it killed. But it was fatal nonetheless”.

“So you are responsible for all of this?”

“No, no, no! Don’t pin your wrong choices on me, Max! I only ever highlighted the options you had. But we always make choices as one. All parts of us together. It’s not my fault you constantly follow my advice. Think of me as of an attorney, defending a client who’s obviously guilty. I have to do this. It’s my job. So when the neglectful jurors return a not guilty verdict and the accused is released into the world to commit more evil, whose fault it is?”

“You can’t be a part of me. I‘m not a good person. But you … you’re a monster”.

“If I’m a monster, that makes you a monster as well, at least in part. And I’d say that you’re a monster in full. All your parts are monsters. It’s just that I’m honest about what I am. All your other parts, including the one I’m talking to right now, are in denial. Care to explain one thing to me? Why did you kiss Chloe when she dared you to on Wednesday morning, but then you immediately rewound time and didn’t kiss her for a second time? So you had all the fun of kissing her and she had none of the fun of being kissed by you? You used her body for your own pleasure but you made sure she got none of that pleasure back? At best that makes you a selfish lover. At worst that makes you … an artist. Like Jefferson and Nathan. You like posing others for your own pleasure, you steal moments from other people and you make sure they don’t remember those moments at all”.

“Shut up! I am nothing like them!”

“Oh really? How is what you did to Chloe different than what Nathan did to her? You used her for your own pleasure for five days and then you tossed her away like trash, making sure she would remember none of it. At least he was done with her in a single night. You took your sweet time with her. Oh, and another thing you have in common. You both murdered her”.

“I had to! You said so yourself!”

“You didn’t have to do anything. You chose to do that. You know he’s going to be released soon, right? I give it three years. And then Sean Prescott’s golfing buddies at the Oregon Supreme Court, you know, the ones whose election campaigns he financed, are going to overturn Nathan’s conviction. What a beautiful story they are going to tell! And the media is going to repeat it a thousandfold. A story of a promising, talented, handsome, well-mannered young man from a good family who had the misfortune of crossing paths with two whores. One junkie whore named Rachel, who overdosed despite Nathan’s best efforts to make her quit her drug habit. He probably even performed CPR on her once she OD’d. Alas, to no avail. But it does explain his DNA, if any is found on Rachel. And then there was a second whore. She got innocent little Nathan drunk and she dragged him to bed. A filthy gold digger, who just wanted to lay her grubby hands on his family’s well-earned wealth. And when she tried to violently extort money from him, he simply had to stand his ground. Ooh, ooh! I have idea for another juicy detail to this story! She wanted to extort money from Nathan because she was pregnant! Nathan, being a responsible young man, of course insisted on using protection, but she pricked the condom with a needle, like gold-digging whores do to accomplished men they want to entrap. I mean killing your pregnant mistress is perfectly legal. Haven’t you seen ‘Fatal Attraction’”?

Max vomited into the sink, violently. She had eaten very little that day, so it was mostly bile. It went out of her mouth and nose. She wiped her face with her sleeve. Leaning against the sink, she said hesitantly: “But … those are all lies. None of that is true”.

“Max, of course we both know the truth. Nathan murdered Rachel in the course of a ‘photo session’ he gave her. And he was … extra hands-on with her, wasn’t he? At least Jefferson didn’t insert himself into the pictures. But Nathan … half the pictures of Rachel we found in the Dark Room were of him groping her, kissing her, lying on top of her … I mean no wonder Jefferson killed him. He was furious Nathan treated his adolescent girlfriend that way. And we know why Chloe wanted hush money from Nathan. Because he drugged her and gave her a ‘photo session’ too. And she knew she would get zero justice by going to the Prescott-owned police department. You remember that cop who openly told you, in a crowded diner, that he and his buddies were taking money to look out for little Nathan? We know what she did was the only way for her to get any semblance of justice. That’s the truth. But the biggest problem with the truth is getting people to believe in it. Especially if they were bribed not to. You know, they are not going to use exactly the same story I just told you. No, they are probably going to use something even worse, something even more insulting to your dead best friend’s memory. You can run, but you cannot hide, Max. You can run to a place where the local news from Oregon don’t reach, like a hippie commune in the middle of Arizona. But sooner or later, those news are going to reach you. Hell, maybe you’ll learn of Nathan’s rehabilitation and of the awful crimes of Rachel and Chloe ten years after it makes the headlines here in Oregon. But you will hear about that. I can’t wait to see your face then. I can’t wait to hear how you try and fail to convince yourself it had to happen for the greater good”.

“But … there is evidence. Nathan’s real student record. The photograph of Chloe he kept in his drawer”.

“Too bad you only regained memories of those days you chose to erase today. Had you remembered anything on Monday, you could’ve told someone. But now? Those documents and photographs are long gone. The principal has been on the take from the Prescotts for years. He swept under the rug Nathan’s many violent outbursts and his drug peddling. What, you think he won’t sweep this under the rug? If only out of concern for his own skin? If Prescotts go down, Wells goes down with them. Come on, he let a violent, drug-addled boy attend Blackwell for years, instead of expelling him, like he should’ve. But we know only poor people get expelled, don’t we? Poor girls get expelled for a little graffiti in the parking lot. Rich boys don’t get expelled when they are caught selling drugs and beating other students up. Wells will never let anyone see Nathan’s real student record, the one he kept secret for so long. He will only show the fake one, the one painting a rosy picture of Prescott junior. And the photograph from Nathan’s drawer? Long gone. Taken by Wells himself or some other schmuck on the Prescott payroll. But don’t be too hard on yourself, Max. Who would you have told about this evidence? The insanely corrupt cops, who only arrested Nathan because they found him at the crime scene, smeared in his victim’s blood? They would’ve supressed or even outright destroyed all that evidence, too. You know, to keep those envelopes coming”.

Max kept breathing heavily, as if she was about to throw up again.

Her mirror image kept driving the knife ever deeper into Max’s heart: “Why are you so disgusted with all of that? Those are all consequences of the choice you made. You didn’t want to live with the Storm as the unintended consequence of your rescue of Chloe. And now you don’t want to live with Nathan’s impunity and the desecration of your best friend’s memory as the consequences of your choice not to save her. At some point you have to own the consequences of your actions, whatever they are. And why are you so disturbed at the thought of Nathan’s release? You have so much in common. Two artistic souls? And you already share such a deep bond. To have murdered someone together? To have the same blood on your hands? I don’t know if a deeper connection can be established between two persons. If you start writing him letters now, you can marry him the moment he is released. But I suggest you start writing now. Because there’s going to be a lot of competition. Hybristophilia is quite common among young impressionable women such as yourself. Especially if the murderer is cute and rich”.

Anger overpowered Max’s disgust. She banged her hand on the mirror and shouted: “Fuck you!”

“’Fuck me?’ You’re talking to yourself, Max. What does ‘fuck you’ even mean in this context? Are you announcing that tonight, once you’re all snuggled under your covers, you’re going to touch yourself? Are you going to think about your precious punk Chloe as you do so? Face it, what you felt for her wasn’t love. If you loved her, why did you never say it? She said it twice. She always said it just before you killed her. Because no matter the timeline, you always end up murdering her. And always with her dying breath she confesses her love for you. And you never reciprocate. Why? If you loved her, why didn’t you tell her that? ‘I’m sorry, I don’t want to do this’ is not exactly a love confession. No, it’s what a butcher says to a sad-eyed calf they are about to slaughter. What you felt for her was lust. You realized you were already in your senior year and you wanted to go through a ‘bad girl phase’. And you did. A perfect ‘bad girl phase’. No messy breakup, no clinging. Everything just erased, like your browser history. If you didn’t want to lie you loved her, you at least could’ve told her she deserved your love and friendship and deserved to be alive. When she said she didn’t, you didn’t deny that. And by sacrificing her, you kinda proved her right on that point”.

Max once again banged on the mirror and screamed: “Stop it! I loved her! I still do! You are defiling the best, purest thing I’ve ever felt! That I will ever feel!”

Her reflection’s stern facial expression gave way to a malicious smile. Just like she said, she enjoyed seeing Max squirm. “And we both know why you lust for tall girls with tattoos and bright hair dye. Jefferson’s albums. The ones you loved so much. The ones which drew you to him. The ones which made you wish to be one of his students. The ones he shot in his Seattle days. The ones filled with girls from the local music scene. You loved how he captured them. The difference between you and him is that he grew bored of faux-punk sluts like that and moved on to decent girls from good families. But you continued to lust after low-hanging fruit. At least until you could try it. And when you saw your long-lost friend dressed just like those girls from Jefferson’s albums you’d thought about when touching yourself, you just had to possess her. So tell me, Max. This night, with your hand between your legs, are you going to think about her? Are you going to think about the oh so wet kiss you gave her just before you murdered her?”

“Shut up! Shut up, you monster!”

“I think you’re going to do just fine here at Blackwell. Now that the position of the school princess is confirmed to be vacant, you have a decent shot at taking it. You and Rachel are so alike. You both wanted to fool around with a cool punk rocker. But once you discovered that underneath that thin façade was a real girl, one with her own feelings and other messy things like that, who instead of constantly providing you with cheap thrills actually needed something from you, needed your love and care, you couldn’t throw her away fast enough. I wonder, what’s a more cowardly way of breaking up with someone? Leaving them a scribbled note or murdering them?”

“Shut up. Please, shut up” – Max pleaded quietly with her tormentor.

“Max, why are you even standing here, listening to me? You could’ve walked out that door the moment I spoke up. But you didn’t. Why? Because you know you deserve to hear all of that. You are simply accepting your just punishment. Because even though you want to delude yourself into thinking that you’re an everyday hero who saved their hometown, you know you are the monster. And something even worse. How do you call someone who makes a promise to love and protect another person, but then breaks that promise every single time? How about ‘oath breaker’? That does have a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?”

Max turned to walk away. She said in a resigned tone: “Enough. Maybe I do deserve to hear all of that, but I can’t take it anymore”.

“If you’re tired of my words, how about listening to someone else?”

Max heard her voice. Not her reflection’s. Her own voice coming from the mirror. And then she heard Joyce’s.

“I wish I was a better friend. I know Chloe doesn’t get many visitors”.

“Oh, Max. You’re Chloe’s best friend for a reason. You’re here exactly when she needs you”.

Max turned towards the mirror again and saw Joyce sitting in her bed. Then the image shifted and she saw William sitting at the table in the Prices’ living room. And once again she heard her own voice.

“William, I just want you to know, that whatever happens, I’ll always be here for Chloe. Always”.

“I know you will, Max” – replied William.

Max’s reflection editorialized: “Had they only known that by ‘being there for Chloe’ you actually meant murdering her”.

The image in the mirror kept shifting, showing her various moments from the week that never was. Max was being lashed with her own words. Bitter, burning tears ran down her cheeks.

“I’m with you to the end, Chloe. You know that”.

“Chloe, you’re priceless”.

“I never want to hurt you! Ever!”

“I always wanted my life to be special, an adventure. But not without you!”

“You are my number one priority now! You are all that matters to me!”

“It doesn’t matter what happens to me. I have to save Chloe!”

“Nobody is going to hurt Chloe ever again!”

The image shifted and Max was once again staring into the eyes of her reflection. Only it was a reflection of her thirteen year old self, in a similar black dress meant for funerals. The reflection said, in a high-pitched, childish voice:

“You don’t have to worry about anything changing. You’re dealing with so much other stuff. You don’t deserve any of this. Chloe, listen. Even if I never … Even if we’re moving for good ... We’re always together, okay? Even when we’re apart. We’re still Max and Chloe. I will always, always love you”.

Her words were punctuated by a deafening gunshot, so loud it made the mirror shake and Max’s ears hurt.

Thirteen year old Max kept speaking: “Because I will never abandon you, Chloe. I'll always have your back”.

Another deafening gunshot.

Her thirteen year old reflection had more to say: “You’re sick in the head, you know that? I said those things because I was a stupid brat and I didn’t actually mean any of that. I didn’t even know what it meant to love someone. But you … It wasn’t enough for you to make false promises to a nineteen year old Chloe. No, you had to go back in time and lie to a fourteen year old Chloe’s face as well”.

Max turned around, walked over to the fire alarm and retrieved the hammer she was supposed to use on Monday.

Walking back to the mirror, she saw her eighteen year old reflection holding a black notebook covered in colourful stickers.

“You really should give it a read. I don’t know why Joyce and David gave their daughter’s belongings to you of all people. That guy Eliot deserved it way more. You know, the one from kindergarten? At least he loved her. In a possessive, jealous way. But he loved her. Unlike you and Rachel. And he was in her life for way longer than you. The next time you’re going through your victim’s belongings, don’t stop at the pictures you took of her. They only show how you saw her. Read her diary instead. Learn how she saw you”.

Other Max opened the notebook and started reading aloud. Max was already next to the mirror, hammer in her raised hand. But when she heard what had been written, she couldn’t move: “The worst part is that even though we haven’t spoken in months, even though she habitually ignored my texts so much that I just stopped trying, even though I know, deep down, that she doesn't care about me anymore and that she probably has all new friends up in fucking Seattle ... I still miss her. If she came back tomorrow and said ‘hey Chloe, want to dress up like pirates and be stupid together?’, I would take her back in a heartbeat”.

Other Max showed Max the contents of the page. “See? And then she drew a heart and added ‘in a heartbeat’ once more. That’s what she thought of you, bleeding out on the floor. How she would take you back in a heartbeat if you just reached out. But you never did. She never saw you after William’s funeral. She never had the chance to take you back in a heartbeat. Because you never came back. And because you stopped her heart from beating. Forever”.

With an unarticulated scream, Max struck at the mirror. An avalanche of glass shards fell into the sink, mixing with bile. Max breathed heavily. Some of the things the other her said were obvious lies. That she didn’t love Chloe. That she was anything like Jefferson and Nathan. But other things … That she had broken her promise. That she had failed her friend. Max desperately wished those things were lies as well.

Her reflection, its voice distorted, as it was now coming from dozens of glass shards at the same time, dealt her a final blow: “Live with the consequences of your actions, Max. Or don’t. I’m fine either way”.

“Oh, I’m not going to live with them. But not in the way you want me to”.

“What, are you trying to tell me you’re going to find your courage and confidence? That part of you is all shrivelled up, almost dead. You’re never going to find her alone”.

“I’m not alone. I have my best friend to help me”.

Max walked over to the corner she had cowered in on Monday. She looked everywhere, but the photograph she had dropped five days earlier was nowhere to be found. She turned to the trash cans, picking them up and emptying them onto the floor. She knelt and started going through the piles of slimy garbage with her bare hands, begging whoever and whatever was listening for the butterfly picture to turn up. It didn’t.

#max caulfield #other max #life is strange #lis #chloe price #pricefield #nathan prescott #mark jefferson #life is strange fanfiction #fanfiction #rachel amber

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