#IM DONE why did i make myself do this | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

m1croph0n · 1 month ago

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first post of 2025 wooo

actually the drawing was the last thing i drew for 2024 but i forgot to post it but whatever

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xxplastic-cubexx · 5 months ago

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oh noooo or whatever

bonus aka The Real Motive Behind This:

SURPRISE double bonus. textless ver of the first pic under the cut

#xmen #xmen comics #cherik #professor x #magneto #charles xavier #erik lehnsherr #erik magnus lehnsherr #max eisenhardt #snap sketches #guys i drew cherik after walking to the comic shop to see official cherik omg .....#context if needed: in like. issue 17-18 of the og run magneto hijacks the x mansion and sets up The Mental Wave Distorter trap #and unfortunately the second i saw it i knew what i had to do because I Cannot Be Salvaged #tbh this was suppoesd to be moooorrreee 2011 Yaoi Doujin Core but clakjkl i like it like this way i fear #i was gonna put dialogue bubbles for the first pic but like that a lot. even tho i did post a textless ver Bro My Head Hurts #this was also supposed to be quick and thats why its in a limbo of Effort Was Made and I Held Back #because after the sketch i realized i wanted to lock in. sort of 💀 still like it tho !!!!!!#more importantly dont take me to comic shops all ima do is think of ship art to make later !!!!!#on that note tho i did have a silly giggle to myself when i saw the resurrection of magneto #like it was the silliest reaction i felt like a dog jlvkjavlka #i also found another magneto-centered run im excited bout ...... both sets were missing One book so im gonna scream but moving on #uhhhh ok im done here. my heads been hurting all day i hope its nothing serious #whats funny is that i actually planned to draw movie cherik today but alas. plans were changed #theres always tomorrow !!!!!!!!! i love you tomorrow .....#bye bye im going to bed

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isjasz · 2 years ago

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Who did you leave behind?

(if boatem after joining scar's crew tattoo/paint or just cut an identical scar as Scar on their arms bc pirate crew amirite)(yes this is a one piece reference)(yes I will continue doing them)(yes I don't care)

#pirates smp #goodtimeswithscar #mumbo jumbo #grian #pearlescentmoon #impulsesv #boatem #my art #hermitblr #pirates boatem #<- gonna start using this tag for all the art i make about them bc im probably making a shit ton #havent done self-indulgent fully rendered stuff in a while enjoy thumbs up #i miss boatem sm this hurt my own soul why did i do this to mysELF

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bacchuschucklefuck · 2 months ago

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caps from comic Im doing

#not art yet. sorta #yeah that's one piece #outing myself this year as a sanji enjoyer #idk what compelled me to come back here (that's a lie I know 100% and it's haterism) but I did finally sit down and put down #this idea I've sat on for a Long time. bc I think I just. finally feel ready for it #or rather. both it and myself have been worn down and moulded enough by just. time passing. to be able to sit with each other in peace #but yeah I'm now neck deep in this (almost halfway thru inking!!) and Im learning a Lot #whatever u say abt one piece oda is a Phenomenal comic artist. one piece art-wise is dense on a level that makes me feel insane #like you barely see more than one type of screentone used and it's mostly to separate planes. its Just Ink. its fucked up #and drawing this comic is forcing me to show up on my a-game on a craft level as well. I love so much a Large part of it so far #comic is good guys. did u guys know that has anyone said this before #but yeah this one will! probably get posted to my main blog when the posting version is done. which is why I said in the prev ask #that the spheres might intersect soon lol #Im aware this is a stupid way to go about it if u look at it from a marketing/advertising angle. but thats not what Im here for #Im showing u cool bugs I made basically. and when the exhibit happens its gonna have mostly nothing to do with this #but yeah. if u see a comic with these caps in it in the future u will Know #otherwise we keep up kayfabe yeah? for fun. for comfort

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hythlodaes · 2 months ago

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GIGI'S 2024 GPOSE WRAPPED

i only started at the end of 2023, so i feel like i've really learned a lot over the past year :') it's been so much fun bringing these ideas to life!! (also ty meg @lilas for letting me borrow avi for may <3)

#i won't lie the first leo shot is still everything to me #and wild that jan-may were done with anam lmao why did i do that to myself for so long !#but i love looking back at them !!!#i want to get better tho esp with lighting !! maybe i will take. a clear shot for once. goals for next year !#but i'm really proud of all my work :')#sorry i didn't do a template or make this look nicer skdfjsfd im tired !#ffxiv #oc: emile jenidaut #gpose wrapped

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urfavisananimegirl · 2 months ago

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walter white from breaking bad

Walter Hartwell White (Breaking Bad) is an Anime Girl!

#my name is walter hartwell white. i live at 308 negra arroyo lane albuquerque new mexico 87104. this is my confession. if youre watching thi #s tape im probably dead. murdered by my brother in law hank schrader. hank has been building a meth empire for over a year and using me as #is chemist. shortly after my 50th birthday hank came to me with a rather shocking proposition. he asked that i use my chemistry knowledge t #cook methamphetamine which he would then sell using his connections in the drug world. connections that he made through his career with the #DEA. i was... astounded. i always thought that hank was a very moral man and i was thrown. confused. but i was also particularily vulner #able at the time. something he knew and took advantage of. i was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. han #took me on a ride along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. and i was weak. i didnt want my family to #go into financial ruin so i agreed. every day i think back at that moment with regret. i quickly realized that i was in way over my head an #hank had a partner. a man named gustavo fring. a business man. hank essentially sold me into servitude to this man and when i tried to quit #fring threatened my family. i didnt know where to turn. eventually hank and fring had a falling out. from what i can gather hank was always #pushing for a greater share of the business to which fring flatly refused to give him and things escalated. fring was able to arrange uh i #uess you could call it a hit. on my brother in law. and failed but hank was seriously injured. and i ended up paying his medical bills whic #amounted to a little over 177000. upon recovery hank was bent on revenge working with a man named hector salamanca. he plotted to kill frin #and did so. in fact the bomb that he used was built by me and he gave me no option in it. i have often contemplated suicide but i am a cowa #d. i wanted to go to the police but i was frightened. hank had risen in the ranks to become head of the DEA and about that time to keep me #n line he took my children. for 3 months he kept them.my wife who up until that point had no idea of my criminal activities was horrified t #learn what i had done. why hank had taken our children. we were scared. i was in hell i hated myself for what i had brought upon my family.#recently i tried once again to quit to end this nightmare and in response he gave me this. i cant take this anymore. i live in fear every #ay that hank will kill me or worse hurt my family. i... all i could think to do was make this video in hope that the world will finally see #this man for what he really is.#breaking bad #walter white #your fave is an anime girl #your fave is #hall of fame

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lights-at-night · 8 days ago

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gender euphoria moment ! rare morgan w

#like the outfit itself was not a big deal. i didnt even wear it outside. but i looked in the mirror and felt something more than apathy #i looked in the mirror and i did not see a boy or a girl. which is in fact a big deal.#i took pictures. i fucking took pictures of myself on my own i cant emphasise how little i have ever done that. i even drew myself #i have spent my life under the pressure to look normal #it's why when i started becoming conscious of appearance i wanted to look like the average girl/boy on the street #and whenever i dress in the presence of other people i still worry about whether i will look normal. in place.#so putting on things in the locked bathroom of my own house is just. freeing i guess #i hardly ever go out which is probably half the reason for the anxiety around it #and there's like. the social expectation that you cant dress well unless you have a reason #like i literally never get to do this. let me have it #n e ways. i dont think what makes me feel gender euphoric is as easy or binary as it is with some of the people i know irl #i just! i want to look trans. i want people to look at me and be uncertain.#i always used to dress like the most “normal” person ever because i felt like it was a requirement #so it's alwayd fun to get vaguely formal with it #not a revelation exactly that if you fuck around with clothes and find what you like and wear it it's good. but worthy of note #idk where im going with this im rambling. whatever its my blog #personal posts #might post the fit on art blog bc i want attention and compliments. anyway.#<- wow im so narcissuspilled #<- me when i show myself any form of feeling toward myself that isnt hatred

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triglycercule · 2 months ago

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all i have been able to think about today is that silly little knife game where you stab the spots between your fingers and try not to hurt yourself and how that silly little game is SO horrorkiller. i cant explain it it bothers me so much that i cant explain it but it just does its so them

they play it when theyre bored. because when in doubt bodily mutilation and the risk of hurt and pain is always an appealing one. and when i mean they i just mean killer because horror wouldn't wanna just hurt himself on the fly like that for funsies. he likes to see others hurt because hahaha FINALLY some damn entertainment!!! but hurting himself???? nononnno hes already got enough body pain as it is oh and killer has already grabbed his hand and started playing (and now horror can't back out because killer's got him sucked in the game)

they sing the silly little song. horror has all his fingers the knife goes chop chop chop if killer misses the spaces in between horror's fingers will come off! and they are both enraptured and both captured in this childishly morbid game. it's so anticipatory because they both know its all up to killer to decide if horror gets hurt. hes more than precise enough to keep the game going for hours long without ever hitting horror but would he want to keep it going for that long? horror doesn't know how long killer would want to wait before getting to see him react to getting hurt

and killer does eventually do it even after theyre sung the song over and over countless times and tried different harmonies and finally killer decides to end this little song and dance and stab into horror's hand. maybe he decides to do a finger. maybe the palm if he really wants to piss horror up. its sudden its surprising and GODDAMN is it painful!!!! horror's trying not to show it but with all the sweat and the way his fingers are twitching killer can see that it hurts him. it's a bit amusing :3

and then horror grabs the knife from killer and they do it all over again but this time horror's the one doing the stabbing. he's not as precise as killer. he hits him a lot more than killer hit him but goddamn it he is in PAIN and wants to let it out because hes annoying and irritated and goddamnit would killer just stop looking at him with that blank smile while he's bleeding out from his hand???? yeah horror's pissy

horror's annoyed and trying to get some form of petty revenge on killer (he likes it when he finally manages to get that stupid smile to falter just a little bit) and killer's watching horror desperately try not to just stab the knife through his oh so very exposed soul that he could very easily hurt if he really wanted to hurt killer. anyways the game finally ends when either one or both of them get bored! but thats fine!!! killer will get bored again and horror will end up escalating it to a messier point than it was before and the only thing that'll get hurt is the surface that they use to stab between fingers. oh and eachother of course :p

#just know that this was based solely off vibes going on in my head #none of this makes sense at all and i have no idea how to express what im thinking but DAMMIT i know what im talking about!!!!!#two sadists walk into a room. one of them enjoys pain one of them doesnt. they make out (horrorkiller)#i just really think theyre neat. it would be sweet to hear them sing that song. it fits them so well #horrorkiller has the knife game. kist has russian roulette. what does horrordust have #what homoerotic dangerously reckless game could horrordust play??? i dont particularly know..........#i remember playing this game when i was younger except i used a pencil. because i dont wanna fucking stab myself????#the song starts off by mentioning that they get drunk first which like. yeah that seems right #horror would start the game if he were first that way he'd get first turn and then get whiny when killer does it back #the knife goes chop chop chop NO IT DOESNT SILLY! the knife cuts the axe chops :3 #horror's voice is all shaky and unstable from the anger and pain while killer's is smooth and calm despite him being hurt more #the dichotomy >>>> i love horrorkiller theyre my favorite mttduo!!!!#guy who feels too much and guy who doesnt feel enough. guy who tries to feel nothing is also there but this isnt about dust ok #cringe stuff i removed from the post: horrorkiller holding their mangled hands together while they play this game #the red and black of their blood mix together and drips on the floor from their ruined hands :3 so sweet..........#because horror needs a thing to squeeze while trying to pretend that killer stabbing through his fucking wrist doesnt hurt 💀#dust knows exactly what game they played the night before when horror starts wearing full gloves. and killer ditches his fingerless ones :3 #kiiiillllerrrr stop showing off your stab wounds from your buddy thats not family friendly nor is it straight 😒😒😒😒#tricule hc #killer sans #horror sans #dust sans #murder time trio #he's MENTIONED (like always. if the 3rd member of the trio wasn't mentioned in tags who would i be)#sans au #utmv #horrorkiller #horrorkiller nation (grand total of 5 people) cmere pspsspspspspsps #1/10 DONE for christmas uaagahhh. why did i tag this hrkl when technically all of my posts could be seen as mttpoly anywausLMAO im so tired #off to do the other 9/10 posts i have to finish.....hahahahaah iM SO TIRED WEARE STILL NOT OPENING GIFTS YET WTF PLEASE I WONT STAY AWAKE

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lucksea · 6 months ago

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now that artfight is over i can take some time to properly design them before i make new refs

#null havoc damage #ultraman showtime #allegro and lyle are basically done i think. i just gave allegro his arm fins back #i took them off at one point but after remembering that belial and geed have them im putting em back on #i still think lyle looks too simple but then again whenever i try to draw a showa ultra i go 'this is too simple'#so im leaving him as he is .#i adapted zero darkness' markings for zstar this time and i like it a lot i think the lightning bolt esc patterns look super cool #marize also looks too simple but alas... i dont want to overdesign her either #im also not sure i like the shade of pink i picked for her metal i might mess with her colors more #but i like the idea of her metallic bits being iridescent bc she looks like a fish #i did not attempt to do that in the shading though . which may be why it looks bad #idk. my power is flickering so im too scared to draw on my pc so ipad doodles are happening instead #i also dont know why i gave zstar that stupid ass smirk i just drew it on her and was like yeah ok #I DIDNT MEAN TO MAKE THE BOYS MATTE AND THE GIRLS SHINY. THATS JUST HOW IT SHOOK OUT #allegro could be shiny but when i tried to make him shiny it looked weird. might try again later #i think i just need to do a bunch of iterations with marize and then pick one and make myself be satisfied with it #or else im going to mess with her design for weeks on end. sorry mari

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mercymornsimpathizer · 6 months ago

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💥💥💥uh oh! complaining alert!! 💥💥💥

#i have this one friend who pisses me off sooooooo bad #weve known eachother since high school and she literally cannot stop projecting her insecurities on me #any time i talk positively abt something in my life or something im proud of myself for #she acts like im saying that shes the scum of the earth since she doesnt have/hasnt done those things.....#and how not everyone has my opportunities and it isnt so easy for everyone....#like yeah duh but also it WASNT easy for me that why im proud of myself.....and you have had way more opportunities than me.........#i hate this idea that im proud of myself for something that mean i think everyone else should be ashamed #or like...u didnt do what u wwanted bc it was scary or hard and so if i did do it that must mean it was easy and safe for me #not to generalize but it just annoys me so much when ppl valorize their own misery and treat me like im worse #for building a life that actually makes me happy......#and shes always been like this convincing herself that i look down on her but its not based on anything ive done its all in her mind

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artificer-real · 27 days ago

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anxiety anxiety, go away, come again never

#weeeee #vent #i dont know what im supposed to do #i dont know what anyone wants from me #im so tired #ive already donr so much #ive written essays upon essays #ive tried to make you laugh #ive tried to explain whats wrong with me #ive asked for help and recieved just try harder #and so i did try harder #and all i ever get for it all is a scrap of dopamine and relentless *exhaustion*#i feel so empty #nothing ever fills that void for long #even when im enjoying myself i always end up back here #i wanna make people laugh but i dont know how #so i just throw shit at the wall and sometimes it works #i wanna talk about things but i dont actually have anything to say #so i just scrape off the surface and reword it #and boom thats an essay #and ive done that so much #i can only reword the same bullshit so many times #i dont even understand why anyone likes any of my essays i just write them to focus my brain on something for oncw #and yet i keep doing the same stupid routine of misery as always #because i cant do anything else #and even feeling bad is better than feeling nothing #whoopdy do #oh ive hit the tag limit #i had some more self depreciation but whatever im tired #sighhhhhhhh

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eager-wolfboy · 2 months ago

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How is half an espresso martini making me this blitzed wtf

#an original #guess who’s gonna go puppymode as soon as he cannnnnnnn #ok let’s review what this drink has done in my body thus far:#get me to message people back for the first time in like.. at least hours to days #tell someone congratulations on completing their finals on tumblr.com #and then immediately realizing I didn’t ask their owner permission to do so #so Then I make what I feel is the most unintelligible text that apologizes for sending the ask #WHY DID I CHOOSE THIS #WHY DID I CHOOSE TO BE FUCKING DUMB #GRAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #god im so tired #being angry at myself is so exhausting #I wanna be happy with myself #here’s a happy! I did good this week #I worked hard and im celebrating #I’ve gotten so much sleep and actually feel rested #and overall Im just so lucky to be in this life and have all the connections I do

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bunnyboy-juice · 6 days ago

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honestly actually ik the "ride or die, you can have complex feelings about these people who harmed you but i HATE them, you're never wrong" type of friendship is super common n praised n i even can understand why that form of unconditional "love" is appealing, but i genuinely think its the most suffocating form of friendship ive ever experienced

#bunny rambles #mostly bc the only way i can cope with what ive experienced is knowing i am flawed too #knowing many of these ppl who did terrible things to me are. ppl. not random monsters but ppl like me. who fucked up severely #i hold a lot of nuance and rarely talk to ppl ab my feelings bc anyone doing hard line like This Is A Bad Person activates me #even my therapist tried doing that and i had to stop our session right then cause i started sobbing ab the fact ik they arent bad ppl #and her doing that derails from my feelings and pain to them Being Bad and I don't need them to Be Bad to feel my hurt #if anything focusing on morality scares me away n makes me hide but thats also bc ive been experiencing shit since i was [prepubescent age]#so I've been having to live with this shit way longer than i was even in therapy and idk. i think if this stuff only happened starting past #the age of 15 i would be more capable of the b&w morality judgements required for this type of friendship #but I'm really honestly glad to know ppl who like. Dont wanna engage in that b&w morality for every single topic so i can actually talk ab #my feelings w/o feeling suffocated. and btw the suffocating prt to me is the pity and victimization as well. i hte experiencing that part #i had a few session with my therapist (b4 the other anecdote) talking ab how i feel suffocated when pitied and treated As a Victim[tm] even #tho that is language that can be applied to me bc everyone tries to apply that same morality but where i COULDNT have done anything wrong #(n then i feel suffocated n pressure to only say the ways they harmed me or never speak on that so they arent made into a Monster)#(i genuinely do wish the best even for ppl who have done the worst to me. dont be rude)#ANYWAYYYYYYYYYYY rambles and grumbles #(also i bring up the age of trauma in relevance to this not as a comparison but as a note on Why i am the way i am bc ik tht hving to like.#beocme a person w/ my childhood selves all basically being various gaping wounds made me a lot more tender when i started actually being #involved in my life and its been a struggle still w myself sometimes but genuinely remembering i and everyone whos harmed me are all just.#ppl Really helped me be able to like. live with this. idk. im rambling)

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puppppppppy · 1 year ago

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ive made myself more wet and pathetic

#new icon because im SUFFERING. im in HELL #its so bad. i had to sign out of discord so now im both lonely and stressed #because i KNOW im still gonna get dstracted. i just did making this URGH #how good are brains at working around things. i once set a 7AM alarm on my phone with snooze cause i was so sure my brain would #be too lazy and keep snoozing instead of actually turning it off. but nay it either kept sleeping through the alarms and snoozing #or actually managed to turn off the alarm half awake that i barely remembered it and then waking up late #i actually have a track record of climbing out of bed and turning my alarm off without remembering. which is impressive bc i have a loftbed #the other thing is setting fake deadlines so make myself panic into doing things ahead of time. but unfortunately that doesnt work either #because if theres one thing my brain will put all its energy into remembering its self assurance. meaning i WILL be able to remember #the real deadline even if i try to trick myself. cant ask someone to give me a fake deadline either #the only things keeping me going rn is that i have deadlines due at least 1 day between each other and excitement being able to talk with #crow after break. but you can see how well thats going <- ignores long term rewards in favor of short term pleasure #BTW CROW IF YOURE READING THIS IM SO SORRY TURNING OFF MY DISCORD WITH BARELY ANY EXPLANATION #im a huge fucking dumbass and i had barely enough impulse control not to block everyone in my dms because i realized that would send a real #really bad msg. youre not distracting me im distracting myself and i promise youre not annoying me i just really like talking to you and #thats why im just barely stopping myself from signing in. I WANT TO TALK TO U LOTS BUT AT THE SAME TIME IM KICKING MYSELF FOR DOING IT #you can be a little mad at me btw cause i definitely could have done that better but i was all over the place abt how to do it without #making u think im ignoring you. IF THAT MAKES SENSE. SORRY #yapping #doodles #puppysona #edit but last week i tried to schedule and give myself work periods and break periods using my class schedule #and reminders on my phone to tell me when to start and stop. can you guess what happened

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andragoras-in-vanity · 27 days ago

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im sure ive alrwady said this but veilgaurd called me a bottom in evedy language, most strongly elvhen tho. i cannot stop thinking about elgar'nans lil spiel to the venatori saying 'all you must do is love me, and kneel' like bruh......if rook wasnt so spiteful they probably would have...just to see where he was going with that....

#im afraid of a lot as i get to the end of the game but technical things like the skill tree and subclasses aside #i dont get why people are so unhappy with it #maybe im biased cause i always play an elf but i fucking LOVE learning about elvhen history and how we shaped thedas #and then it all went to shit and our gods hated us and used tevinter to make the world worse #i highly doubt this is the last da game the series is too popular and adding that we can be trans now is a massive improvement #even if i think the lighthouse should have been more like skyhold and let us talk to companions more #and craft the armor ourselves #and ngl i think the lighthouse should have been more of a refuge for those that survived the gods attacks #like anyone from arlathen/dmeta or hossberg #idk im really only bad about the skill tree and subclasses and lack of bards tbh #but truely......the lucanis almost kiss???? everything about being a mourn watcher??? my SHATHANN CALLING ME A TWINK #this game called me a slur #and just the fucking appearance of my lil rook....he looked so blissed when under elgar'nans trance #bellara and neve were so done with my shit there 😭#i do want to play a dwarf really badly next time #or qunari because the games have built a really interesting cuture for them but never really went strongly into it other than like #the arishok and the antaam? but now they mention the devouring storm and thats probably a fuckass big dragon #but now i need to know more #im not done but veilguard very much isnt the conclusion #but my god i cant stop thinking about how vulnerable my rook actually is like from the personality ive given him from myself #if the gods or like anaris found him before varric did.....this would be a very different story and there would be a lot of tears and #begging for a shot at redemption and care #oh god wed disappoint vorgoth......might as well just kill myself if that ever happened #i just love that my rook has become more senstive as ive played and more hurt when he was already not doing so hot for personal reasons #he still has a smart mouth but he wants to cry like 9/10 times he has to make decisions #companions stop asking me to shape their lives challenges #ngl rook would absolutely stsrt bawling his eyes out over manfred begging emmerichs forgivness for wanting manfred back #i just imagine tears coming down his face as he tells emmerich manfred was a hero and he deserves another chance to keep learning so that #next time he does soemthing heroic...hes prepared and wont 'die' by doing it #cause my lil guy knows hes not smart enough to bring manfred back himself

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softshuji · 10 months ago

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Any men out there wanna pretend to be my bf to get my parents off my case about marriage? I am so so serious right now.

#my mom gave me a really really lonf lecture and upset me because her and my dad want me to start thinking about settling down ans getting #married. again. cos this comes up all the time. ans I reiterated that i do wanna marry and have kids. i know im 26 years old why do they'#think im also not aware of this??? like i suddenly forgot my own age and have my head in the clouds all the time. and i got so heated cos i #said they only believe in that in theory. in reality neither of them have accepted the idea od my leaving home or the idea of mw being with #a man. and they start freaking out if they even find out i talk to them so to say they want me to get married is so fucking naive #ans when i mentioned this and that they're more than ok w mt brothers talking tp women she said that if i wanted to settle down she could #talk to dad and they could “go about finding someone for me” and I've never been so pissed #i got so upset. why does everyone keep saying this to me. as if anyone my dad knows could ever be a half decent man #and the truth is they don't care if im in a happy marriage they've accepted that i won't be they only care that im gone and saving face in #front of family. that's all. it's always reputation it's always “what will people say?”#not once did love come up. not once did shw even imply that i should marryfor love #or that they hope i love someone and marry them. because they're more happy with the idea of me marrying for the sake of it than #they are at the idea of me finding genuine lovw #im not a fucking broodmare im not here to push out babies for the sake od reputation.#and then i said nor being married isn't the end of the world and she said “it's important that you settle down”#and i said im unwavering in my principles. she can call mw high maintenance like she loves doing but I'm not wavering on the #kind of man i want to be with and when i do marry him i want it to bw genuine. because be loves me and vice versa not because im ticking off #somethin from a damn checklist to appease them. and if being unwavering on my principles means staying unmarried then so be it.#my obligations are to god and myself and that's it #and y'know what??? i am in love with a boy already #and yet they don't care that i wanna be in love at all. no im just a puppet to follow a certain narrative in life live according to evergone #else has and that's it.#im done.#and then she tried to apologise by getting me a slice of cake and that somehow made me feel worse.#i dont want an apology. i want to be heard and actually listened to for once. i want someone to ask what i want. to actually give a shit #and love me cos it's me. not cos im some thing to further an agenda. or some toy or puppet that does your bidding.#is it so much??? to just want to be loved in return? to marry and live according to how i want to?? ans not want anyone to make these #decision's for me?#ruined my whole day.

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