#I'll probably delete this one too
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
I really wish there was an easier way to break into witchcraft. Like I have always felt so lost on my journey. I don't even know where to begin often. I go through partial phases where I wonder if I'm connected to my 'witchiness' at all but for as long as I could like think for myself so middle school maybe? I've been drawn to witchcraft and other things. I just don't know fully what this means for me. I think green witchery may be the answer BUT I still need to read more and I'm not at a place right now in my life, where I can get into herbalism and houseplants and whateva. I feel like connecting to nature around me could be enough for now but I don't know. I always feel so silly talking about this stuff and I've almost made this post a million times but idk. I'm not sure I'm cut out for religion (does witchcraft always have to be a religion?) And I just... I don't know. It has always meant a lot to me, nature and feeling connected to it. I mean if you were to ask me "what I believe in" I would tell you nature. The stars. The planets. The oceans. Idk. Idk. Idk. Maybe I want some sort of spirituality? Idk. I'm so lost and confused. I'm a staunch atheist but also at the same time, am I? I think so. I can't do the whole religion thing but I often find myself defaulting to the idea of a God and whatever the hell that means. I don't believe in an afterlife. I don't believe in heaven. I don't believe in hell. I think we repeat this life over and over again endlessly, some days. On other days I think there is nothing after this life. I would love to figure this out but I feel like I'm still so far away from knowing.
#stevie.txt#sorry about this dumb ramble. been drafting posts like this for months but i always end up deleting them#I'll probably delete this one too
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
Kung Fu Panda 2 Scene Analysis + Discussion Post
Hey, all! Here's a KFP2 scene analysis because I felt like it. 🤷♀️
I have an itch to scratch and I'm going to make all of you read about it. I've been revisiting KFP2's remarkable storytelling methods—namely for conveying strong emotions without relying on dialogue and putting more faith in the narrative—and when I got to the harbor scene, I couldn't help but write something up on it. In general, writing short essays on scenes/sequences is a great writing exercise that I would recommend for fellow writers because it's a big help when you're trying to emulate a certain style or feel in your work. KFP2 is a great movie and I love it, so I often refer back to it when I'm struggling.
In short, this is me gushing. I know as a fandom we've talked this part of the movie to death a hundred times over, but it's a scene that deserves it. I'm going to be focusing on the aspects of it that interest me most, but the final battle following this scene is just as worthy of being fawned over. I am a KFP fan through-and-through and every scene (in this film especially) deserves its own discussion post. Unfortunately, I'm employed.
I've never done a dedicated sequence analysis before, but I've been delving back into studying animation and that paired with my long-time love for storytelling is more than enough to make me want to do a Tumblr deep dive on this 20~ second master-class in storytelling.
To begin, let's take a look at what's happening here:
Po swims to Tigress to make sure that she's okay. He holds her hand and gets close to her, which is something we can assume he would never do otherwise. I'll cite the attack-hug; we witnessed his (albeit completely understandable) reaction to Tigress initiating physical contact, and his instinct was to freeze in place. It tells us that physical contact is uncommon and maybe even a little awkward for them, and yet, he grabs her hand without hesitation.
My heart...ugh. I was little when this came out and I was STUPEFIED. I also realized I wanted to make movies, though, so I guess it worked out. 🤷♀️
Plus the little thumb-hold from Tigress. I'm nauseous. Kill me.
It's also worth mentioning that despite the fact that Po audibly says her name, she doesn't respond to hearing him. She responds to feeling him. She doesn't start to lift her head until he touches her.
Earlier in the film, it had been made a point that she "feels nothing," which was intended to refer to both her hands and her emotions. She physically and mentally beat herself up for 20 years until she couldn't feel the hurt anymore.
Even so, it only takes Po to unravel that. This is the movie further cementing the franchise-long theme of Po bringing inner peace to the valley. On a more personal note, it's also the movie telling us that Tigress's jadedness only goes as far as she lets it. She is capable of recovery, capable of feeling—it only matters that she allows herself to have those moments.
She looks up. She's relieved. She couldn't save China, but she saved Po. She didn't fail in protecting him this time. She did her job. There's a beautiful contrast between what she's feeling and what he's feeling but they share a point—kind of like a venn diagram. Both feel some kind of relief, however brief. As for their differences, Tigress's defiance is weakened and Po's is ignited. He takes on that weight for her.
The way her head slowly falls back down makes me think she's too exhausted to keep her head up any longer. She had used all of her strength to hold onto Po and look fully at him, face to face, to be sure he was alright. Tigress is the most capable member of the group, but where her most important strength lies is revealed here as well as in the rest of KFP2: in her compassion and care for others.
Po looks at Shen with scathing, genuine contempt. He's taken away too many people Po loves, and Po won't let him take away another. He's thinking about the valley, about his friends, Mr. Ping, and his duty to defend China and bring evil-doers to justice. We see the resolve in his eyes. He'll do what he has to.
The angle of the image is also worth mentioning. With the way the "camera" is tilted—now at a direct eye-level as opposed to a few shots before when Po was almost slouching below mid-frame—Po looks bigger in this shot. He's being framed as a protector. Defender of China. The Dragon Warrior. He's really, truly stepping into this role.
Tigress bows her head and Po takes on the weight, which is a huge contrast to the rest of the film. Before this scene, Tigress is the one being strong, being smart, taking charge, and leading the group. Throughout the mission, Po was consistently reckless, stubborn, and distracted. We know why. This bit is his amendment. This is him saying and meaning, "I've got this."
And then he pushes Tigress away. The little look I caught in this screenshot lingers for only two~ seconds, but what I love about animation is that everything is intentional. He watches her float away for an extra few seconds because it meant something to someone that he did.
AND THEN SHE REACHES FOR HIM. Whose idea was this? We need to have some words. You guys were evil and I love it.
She's exhausted, hurt, and is likely carrying the crushing weight of China's defeat on her shoulders, and yet, she reaches for him. It wouldn't even be for her own comfort, either, but because she still has the urge to save him. Even in her state of being borderline unconscious, she still has that instinct—that care. She can't watch her friend be killed.
I pause on this whenever I watch this scene over. To me, this frame perfectly encapsulates Po as a character. We see him facing impending doom in the form of a massive ship with a monstrous-looking cannon strapped to the front, harboring a psychotic peacock fully intending to kill him—just like he killed Po's mother—when he gets the shot.
Despite this, Po only pushes Tigress—a loved one, and while it's far more impactful to the story that it was her, it could have been anyone and the point still stands—out of the way. He moves her out of the line of fire and lures the danger away. That simple action of pushing her away is the epitome of "show, don't tell" used correctly and tells the audience everything we need to know.
And then he goes and stands on a floating chunk of fallen ship (not even solid ground!) and fights solo against an entire fleet of weaponized ships. And then he wins in what's arguably the coolest, most badass way possible.
This—this frame, not the fight itself—is easily his most heroic and selfless moment and it's my favorite frame in the KFP trilogy.
Thanks to all who read this through for indulging my intense love for this specific sequence! This analysis isn't objective, obviously, so if there are any disagreements, I'd really like to talk about them! I'm always looking for different perspectives and ideas, and I'm sure there's a fan somewhere who interpreted this scene wildly differently. I'd also just really love to hear any additional thoughts if there's something I missed. And if another scene gets you super excited like this one does for me, tell me all about it!
An update for my readers: Chapter 6 of The Days is well on its way and I can't wait to share it with you—there's some fun stuff in there and I'm really excited to post it. Thanks for reading, guys! :)
#kung fu panda#kung fu panda 2#cinemetography#cinema#written in one sitting so I'm sorry if I sound insane#dreamworks animation#kfp#movie analysis#analysis#might delete later#po and tigress#they live in my brain#they go on long vacations sometimes but they always come back#probably reading too much into a few bits but shhh#i'll never forgive them for adding this pivotal sequence#and proceeding to do nothing with it#didn't have to cook that hard#such a moving and emotionally charged scene#how i love intelligent storytelling#bring this back#i beg#i love this so much it makes me sick#guillermo del toro#pls come back
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
Heathcliff and Hareton. To me
#This is why I love them so much lmao#Satoru Gojo#Megumi Fushiguro#I think I'll tag this way to make it coherent with DN and PH#I talk too much#Jujutsu Kaisen#I should probably delete this later#Or maybe not. Maybe I'm keeping this post#'of the two options he was the better one' <- literally Heathcliff and Hindley lmao#Heathcliff#Hareton Earnshaw#Hindley Earnshaw#Wuthering Heights#Sorry‚ I had to
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
okay i need feedback from the autism mentall illness website um. this is going to read like an AITA post. brother vs half-sister (who are currently my dependents do to their own individual disabilities + ptsd/depression) spat i will skim the details on but i'm worried my sister will discount my take since i'm not autistic myself so. am i crazy to call it ableist to look at an autistic person (23) who is clearly going through it dealing w long term depression, a world that doesn't give a shit abt him, unemployment, very self-isolated and burnt out barely leaving his room because the world is an ableist dumpster fire with zero opportunities for him, and then bring up childhood abuse he's suffered and his diagnosis as reasonable factors on top of this to worry he'll [checks notes] abuse my cat just to hurt me or even worse have a breakdown and kill me and his other sibling in a violent episode, a train of thought i probably wouldn't even be having were he not [checks notes] mad at me for the first time in my life?
like i don't have any other read on this kind of fear-based characterization other than ableism. like those are very real things in his life but she never points out any current violent behavior, of which there are none, only the one (1) instance of him lashing out when he was like 14 and Officially Diagnosed Low Empathy she thinks is a concern and Hateful Looks toward her since he stopped getting along with her, that's it. i tried explaining to her why i, someone who's lived w him his entire life, can vouch for how unlikely he is to do anything like that, especially when it's again not based on anything he's actually currently doing except for isolating in a way that is much more indicative of him potentially being a danger to himself than anyone else, and being cold towards her specifically, and i thought she had let it go, but when i brought it up off-hand in a conversation tangentially related, she continued to defend and justify her Concern about the potential directions his behavior could lead to because [checks notes] other people in similar situations have lashed out and killed their entire families according to. true crime books or videos she's watched on youtube as far as i'm aware. ignoring the fact that her and i have had the same or Worse childhood abuse and have acted similarly isolated in the past, or for her literally just as currently as him, and she's not expressed any worry past or present about either of us doing anything like that, in my opinion obviously because i haven't cut her off due to our differences like he decided to. like am i big sibling biased because this is pissing me off so bad.
#j.txt#autism#ableism#very sorry to hang all my dirty laundry like this but she is absolutely the type of person to not take accusations of ableism seriously#due to being disabled/traumatized herself and i. feel like she thinks just because she's fixated on and consumed so much about like#mental disorders and illness and whatever she thinks she's an expert on it#enough to like. non-gendered equivalent mansplain peoples' own traumas and disorders to them lol which she has done to me as well#my brother actually last i checked felt like his diagnosis wasn't even accurate#but to me knowing our mom was v ableist antivax about her understanding of autism and a very neurotypical definition of it#it makes sense if the criterias or definitions don't feel accurate to him#idk. IDK#um. if this gets no engagement i'll delete it rather quick probably i just#don't wanna talk out of my ass when i'm not even autistic yk#i'm very aware i can be biased about him vs her because i actually grew up w him and he's younger than us but like#i havent heard him use her own diagnosis and childhood trauma and ugly moments in this way to justify his bad faith characterizations of he#so it's very much. just something she's doing. if my brother started doin it too i'd have the same conversation but he hasn't which i think#is u.m Telling <3#like She's the one actually complaining about how he assumes the worst of her in everything she does now and it makes her feel awful#meanwhile she. probably doesn't say any of this to Him but boy has she talked about it with me!#if it's not obvious we are all very mentally ill trapped in a house 2gether trying to save up to move so we can get away from each other lo
25 notes
·
View notes
Text
laying in my undies because I'm too lazy to change into the big undies (my boxers)
#omg kiera no one cares#by lazy i mean my leg still hurts and i don't want to move#it's been fun to hang out in undies but now it's getting chilly#took undie pictures too cause it's not like I'm gonna do anything else#just for fun tho I'll probably delete them before i go to bed have a habit of not deleting things</3#and then i run out of space and my phone bricks
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
Hi, i've been struggling on this assignment for 6 hours. Yes, i understand what to do. Yes, it can be done in 10 minutes. No, i haven't done it. Can you tell me 5 things you like about me, so i won't hang myself?
#adhd#me when no concentration pills : )#is horrible#too much energy too little brain#i hate it god i hate it#i don't have any juice left for the finals#and my body barely does what i want it to do also#been sick almost every week before this one#I just want to go home soon#but also not cause i'll need to clean#And i nor have i cleaned my room or bathroom or even made my bag to go back home on Thursday#Y'know things that an ADULT is supposed to do#and should've done weeks even months ago#god#and specially today i feel so fucking useless#Like i'm usually useless on the weekends but today i can't even think. I can't even do like the easiest things. Is horrible.#vent#frustration#attention deficit hyperactivity disorder#attention deficit disorder (add)#add#vent post#personal vent#adhd vent#adhd paralysis#might probably delete later#idk#god help me#i can't keep working on these i can't doing anymore#i need a vacation urgently
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
People on the subreddit trying to pass off the BPS "Edd and Eddy holding hands" moment as "brotherly love", who do they think they're foolin with the latent homophobia
#i'll probably delete this later but seriously#I should try not to peek in the reddit too much and I guess this should be one more reason not to#those folks sure are good at being infuriating#gosh diddly darn
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#hhhhh I'll probably delete this later but if i don't physically put these thoughts somewhere I'll maybe explode.#but fuck man. shit sucks fr! I highkey think I can't go to work tomorrow but yknow how it goes!!!!#I'm caught somewhere between finally being taken seriously about my health issues#and having the most wretched mental health crisis#like on one hand fantastic! I'm being taken seriously now its gotten to the point where I cant fucking walk normally#but on the other hand oh my god holy shit. i had to get this bad???? and I'm worried. i know theres shit so much bigger than me rn going on#but I'm worried about my health. especially when I've been trying to deal with it for the better part of like.... 5 years#since i was 19!!!!#I'm 24 and worrying about whether or not I'll actually walk about with 0 pain ever again isn't that fucked.#so that's bittersweet. ive got physio tomorrow. blood tests next week#an ultrasound coming up#its ultimately a good thing im being taken seriously. if not a terrifying acceptance that everything ive been feeling has been real and#well. bad.#and like with this right is the crash of my mental health. just a fuckin nosedive man.#i have a relatively stressful job i felt out of my depth about and thus guilty for but now its a role that I've approached in constant pain#for the last few months.#i can't deal with that actually! lots of stress! lots of pain! lots of mental pain over my physical condition! my job grinding my soul!#aaaaa!!!!!!!#like i dont WANT to be unemployed either#I'd much rather be uhhhh employed! and able to save money towards actually getting Help™#but I've got to admit that i hurt too much. and its consuming my whole fucking brain.#but I'll go on#ive got my first trip out the country solo next week!! im heading to san Fransisco!!! im excited.#but I'm worried for the inevitable moment where my pains catch up with me#ill surpress it while I'm out there. try and remind myself to have a good time. return to the uk and feel a weeks worth of pain#and even THAT sucks to consider#but i should stop#rambles
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
Seeing the same people who perpetuated or sent vicious misogynistic hate to Hannah Schmitz, as well as disgusting racist abuse towards Yuki and Alex because of FUCKING CONSPIRACY THEORIES and those who just straight up ignored it, now up in arms regarding whatever the fuck is going on between the FIA and the wolffs is beginning to piss me off. Because now that it's not someone red bull affiliated involved, it's somehow now unacceptable.
#f1#formula 1#formula one#who knows wtf is going on not the fia and not the teams but anyways#i will say toto needs to be investigated because of previous info breaches#but I've been saying that for years long before F1 academy was ever a thing#there's just been too many instances of him having info he shouldn't and things quietly and quickly changing for his benefit#I'm tired and stressed with trying to finish everything up for the semester hence why I've been less active#but this is just pissing me off#i never forgot or forgave the bs and abuse hannah yuki and alex got and i won't ever forget or forgive#i remember after monaco 22 i saw the anti red bull gang were claiming toto fucked up by “allowing' alex the Williams seat#apparently it was alexs fault ferrari fucked up and red bull were turning the tide smh#the bullshit ted began about hannah and yuki he will never see heaven i swear#and i know not everyone calling out the situation partook in the aforementioned but I'm seeing certain people who did#and they don't seem to notice their hypocrisy or double standards#anyway i get my one annoyed post that I'll probably delete later but at least I've got it out and can now return to watching the clown show#and ignore those with doublestandards#anyways bed now because i think I'm slowly losing my mind#it's not a good sign when you hear the imperial march in your head when thinking of college work is it
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
so, hi!
i just wanted to say that starting this sunday i'll be blocking all empty blogs. if you don't have a icon, header and at least a couple posts on your blog you'll be soft blocked.
though my fics have a high number of notes, recently i felt like i've been writing into the void. and when that happens i always get the feeling that what i write is not even worth a comment. i'd much rather have a smaller number of notes if it means i'll have more interaction with those who read
i've asked, i begged, and nothing seems to work. this is my last try at this thing
#no one will see this so it's whatever at this point#today i got tagged in a fic rec post and i was happy#then i noticed that person who tagged me#never interacted with that fic#so i get in this space where i think i'm asking for too much#but then at the same time i just go... i just wanted to know if you liked it?#i hate to be this person you know#who needs this sort of validation from others#i hate that people only read if there's smut in it#if it's just the smut then even better#but still no interaction#i'll probably delete this these tags later#i just wanted to vent
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
doodle of another little doll i got, one of the simontoys teennar campus dolls! i think she's like grapefruit themed? orange? some kind of citrus. she came with a bunch of extra hands and one of them was this thumbs up and im obsessed with it its so funny i want every doll to have a thumbs up option hand now
#art#traditional art#watercolour#simontoys#teennar campus#dollposting#i deleted my doll blog because im too lazy to keep track of more than 2 blogs so any doll blogging is now going on my main blog LOL#i'll try to keep that as a dedicated tag#i really like this doll shes so cute. theyre really solid standing for a big headed 1/12 scale doll too#maybe its because the school of fancies pennys box dolls are quite a bit spindlier and collapse under their own weight#while these simon toys ones are a little thicker and shorter#i recently put a bit of hot glue in my deer girls legs though so she stands okay by herself#(both still probably need stands if you wanna display em tho LOL just the nature of their big heads)#this doll is so so cute though i love the big thumbs up with the confused stare..... she got NO idea whats going on ever#i know they did an alternate color version in their sakura serious of the same doll and im seriously tempted#its just such a cute design with the fluffy sweater and citrus bear ears hjkfsfjkdlsd
45 notes
·
View notes
Text
My stupid story is 20k now how I do make it stop 😵
#Every time I read through to edit I end up adding another scene this is so fuckin embarrassing#It's not even in chapters it's just one massive thing#The beginning is bad though I have to figure out how to rewrite that but lmao a fixed version with dialogue will be another 2k aha ha ha#There's one long scene I could remove and make that it's own one shot but also god how about I Don't#I'll probably end up deleting it because it's just. Too much. Compared to everything else. But also. What if I didn't? 🤷♀️#I think what's hilarious is that I had Plans. About Themes. And Character Studies. And Comparisons#And idk if it's even really in there and visible and not just 20k of 'what if I just wrote the most indulgent shit for me specifically'#And then ended it with an emotional slap to the face because I love building things up and then tearing it apart#(and it does that really well; I'm giggling into my hands - I'm dancing on my own grave)#I've cried so many times during this stupid fic#*deletes other comment*#Anyway my OTHER fic that I also indulgently love and is way too long and made me cry way too hard every fuckin scene#Does not make me cry anymore and idk if I broke it somehow in the editing or if I'm just immune to its devastation now#Honestly concerned that when I post these I'll be like 'meh; it's just ok' and then anyone who reads it is like ☠️☠️☠️☠️#Hehehehe#Ok I'm done
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
So, Canada has decided to stop sending arms to Israel after an NDP motion. The Liberals made major amendments to it so as to firmly condemn Hamas as well. It's kind of a mixed bag. Honestly, it's naive of me but I didn't expect there would still be so much outrage, even if the motion did call for an acknowledgement of Palestine as a state. All the Conservatives voted against it - to be fair, some of them wanted to wait for the motion to be passed because the amendments were super last minute and the Bloc Quebecois were annoyed that because of this there wasn't a French translation.
I guess it's a step in the right direction. I think it's still weak but you can read more on it here.
Source 1, Source 2, Source 3
#I think the biggest thing that confuses me is that there are still comments about Israel being the only safe place for Jewish people#I don't doubt that - a large (I think unfortunately a majority) percent of the hate crimes this year#have been against Jewish people in my country#But uh... maybe the solution here is to work on making Canada (and the world in general) safer for Jewish people?#I know you can't change people's individual attitudes but really#i think saying 'ah yes jewish people will be safe in this place far away from us#where we don't have to deal with this issue in our own country. not anywhere else though' is... weird#also I think if your argument is genuinely that one group's safety has to come at the expense of an entire other group of people#you need to start thinking outside of such a limited narrow scope#storyrambles#<-i'll probably delete my tags after i'm just... sigh...#i know i'm naive to a degree but i really think these opinions are not... especially radical#also i think canada is reticent to show too much support because that might get conversations going around our occupation#of indigenous land and the landback movements#but that's my own thoughts and a separate (though related) matter
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
I hate having been so vulnerable on here sometimes because I so wanna post about some people demotivating writers to write longfics simply because they don't engage with it a lot + never even read it if it's an unfinished one, though then I remember the shame and the guilt and I just want to fucking bury myself alive and perhaps stab me in the heart a thousand times because how dare I say that
#johnny's silly rambles#yes fuck me for being still not over this sorry I'm just fucking guilt-ridden for eternity as it should be#delete later#probably bc this too is vulnerable#one comment about how ungrateful i am about my comments and I'll explode this tumblr#/joking#I'll consider it though
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
This will always be a better option than arguing with people and attempting to control them. It's not great, but at least I can control myself by just leaving
#personal#now. I mean NOTHING to no one 🩷 I felt like this before anyway so#its nothing new to cry about#i always mean nothing to anyone and everyone else always just moves on as if I'm nothing regardless 💗#maybe I should just delete this blog too#I wish i could just do what 16 year old me did and constantly ask do you like them more than me#why do you need this many friends why do you need to constantly be around people#why do you do this then complain about it later and then talk super awesome of it even though you complain about it#why did you say this when it wasn't true#I wish I could say that your reminder that you can love more than one person just made me feel EVEN more#unloved somehow . like i thought you didnt EVEN love now all you do is talk to everyone always#you were the one with a bad outlook on life when we met. now youre super fucking happy because you just get to be around people all the tim#well good for you I guess. I'm not happy but im happy for you. I'll just be bitter forever in my own corner.#no amount of communication will ever fix how awful I fucking feel. and I feel like absolute shit either fucking way#and nothing can help. nothing will help. nothing. literally not one word is reassuring to me despite knowing they mean well#i trust none of it. especially because everyone in my life says one thing and then means or does another#this is probably the best solution for everyone atp
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
randomfoggytiger's Accounts Are Back!
(Credit to: TIC Photography)
GUESS WHOSE FOUR OTHER XF (FIC AND ALT.) ACCOUNTS ARE BACK (even though the newest one is still shadow banned)?????
MIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
...
#Update#randomfoggytiger#I'll probably consolidate the others into one fic page#and one alt. page#do I delete or create other blogs?#(I am a person who hates too many “things”... hmmmmm.)
7 notes
·
View notes