#I know I shouldn't feel bad

[wanderingmind867]

I don't know why I feel the need to say this, but I'm sorry I haven't been making many posts lately. I don't know why I haven't been making many posts, but I feel apologetic anyways. I don't know if I even should feel this bad, but I just can't always help it. I just make myself feel bad over nothing. I really wish I knew why I can't think of things to post. I know it's no big deal, but I can't always help myself.

[cuoredimuschio]

.

[mandos-mind-trick]

I feel really guilty for not getting anything posted for a few days. I know it's ridiculous, but I hate it. I really want to finish the Wrecker soulmate AU and get the next part of Midnight out, but I just...can't.

I've been feeling like garbage and things just...haven't been going well. I want to write so bad but I'm just exhausted.

So thanks for your patience. I'll get them finished eventually.

[leech-fluincer]

I Missed Christmas Mass this Year

[ms-cartoon]

"You speak just like that Striker friend of yours. The one you tried to kill me and you couldn't be bothered to help me?"

*Gasp* oh my god! You're right! I-I'm so so sorry, your royal highn-ass. I dunno what I was thinking, not stopping what I was doing to save you. I dunno why I did that.

Maybe it's because I have a life outside of FUCKING WITH YOU every goddamn minute!!!

[lunarneo]

Poor Neo- "Wait a Second...."

[spielzeugkaiser]

I love your art soooo much-it gives me life!! 🥰🥰🥰

I have a question about Milek and Jaskier! Milek says they fought before Jask went missing-what did they fight about? Did Milek say something he shouldn’t have? 👀😢 is there ANGST?

Also does Geralt know Mileks plush friend is called Roach? Because surely that’s a clue that Milek is his…(I love this universe so much)!!🥹❤️❤️❤️

[MASTERPOST] That was the last conversation they had before Milek stormed out - and when he came back, Jaskier was. gone. The thing is, Jaskier knows what Milek is interested in (and he is not even wrong about that, Milek has an interest in medicine, and helping people, and I think when they met he was Shanis biggest fan) and I think Jaskier is aware that some of the conflict does have its roots in Milek not wanting to leave him, even if they get really heated and ugly in their arguments. Milek shouldn't feel like he has to care for him, or have to protect him and at times I think Jaskier feels quite ashamed, which leads him to being way too unrelenting at times - especially if he thinks he's doing something to protect Milek.

[loupy-mongoose]

Warning: Contains potentially heavy and uncomfortable subject matter.

PREVIOUS NEXT (DEATH WARNING)

ARC START | CHRONO

~~~~~~

Lavender crashed out through the floorboards and outermost wall of the mansion, following after the larger Mewtwo. Blinking against the sudden brightness of the full sunlight, she spotted him lying stunned in the mansion's overgrown backyard. He hastily shuffled onto his hands and knees.

Suddenly, Lavender's ears rotated back, catching creaks and crashing. Her eyes widened, and she spun around in horror; the mansion was collapsing.

MOM, DAD!

Before she could rush in, however, the two Mews appeared in a zap of light.

Seeing with a sigh of relief that they had escaped the mansion's collapse, she turned back to her target.

Nico was hovering now, giving a sad look to the three Lindens. He met Lavender's furious eyes, and returned with a look of sorrow and regret--a look that caused a sudden twinge in Lav's mind.

Then, he turned and dashed off.

Lavender's blood boiled

You're gonna hurt my dad and run??

She sped after him.

All the while, she ignored a tiny nagging feeling in the back of her mind as hot tears streamed from eyes...

~~~~~

Without warning, Randy transformed into his human form.

He laid in the yard, trembling, wide-eyed and gasping. Akoya nuzzled up into his neck, speaking gently to him and purring.

At first he didn't seem to notice her. But gradually, his breathing steadied, and he lifted a shuddering hand to seek out Akoya's warm pelt.

For a bit, they laid together as Randy slowly managed to calm down.

I don't want him to come back, Akoya...

She looked at him, her purr faltering.

Is that selfish of me?

Akoya laid her cheek on his.

...If it's selfish of you, it's selfish of me...

Randy went on as if he didn't hear her.

C-can he even come back?

...Was he ever gone...?

The blue Mew flicked her tail, uncertain what to think or do. M...Maybe we should try to get back to Fuji...

Randy placed his hands on his head and shook his head desperately. I can't transform... I can't risk losing Randy...

Akoya licked his cheek in understanding. Her ears went back as an unpleasant idea struck. I can try to teleport us there myself... O-Or to a closer Pokemon Center... It would be hard, but... I think I could do it...

Randy didn't respond immediately.

...

Where's Lav?

~~~~~~

Nicodemus flew over the ocean north of Cinnabar, keeping close to the island. His cloak flapped behind him.

As she rushed to catch up to Nico, Lavender readied another swirling sphere of energy. The gap between them closed, and he glanced back at her just as she launched the spere.

He braced for the impact, wobbling slightly in his flight with a grunt before steadying.

Gritting her teeth, she psychically "grabbed" a portion of the ocean in front of the fleeing 'two and launched it upward. Nico swerved just in time to avoid it, careening toward Cinnabar's shoreline.

Lav roared and launched another sphere at him, this one smaller and slightly looser as her anger grew, hijacking her control.

This time the force caught him off guard, sending him rolling and finally sprawling onto the island's shore. Groaning and gasping, he propped himself up on his arms.

Lavender halted and held her position over the ocean water, her teeth bared and face streaked with tears. Her breath was sharp and ragged, and her eyes wild.

Why aren't you fighting back?!

Nico looked up at her, meeting her eyes. His own still showed no signs of anger, but a deep despair.

You want me to?

Lav glared down at him. Her gaze turned downward as she prepped a Shadow Ball.

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!

She launched it down into her own reflection.

Then, she hovered there, motionless. She was wracked with gasping sobs. Her attack bubbled back, splashing her with ocean water, but she didn't notice.

Suddenly, a voice spoke in her mind.

Lavender

She snapped to attention.

A hasty explanation was mentally run by her as she attempted to control her breathing and emotions.

She met Nico's eyes, now realizing what the nagging feeling had been...

Guilt and shame flooded through her. Fresh tears stung her eyes, and she sobbed again.

...I'm sorry, Nico... It wasn't your fault...

Then, she flew off.

It was mine...

~~~~~~

Lavender arrived to find her dad lying in the grass in human form. She felt her blood freeze, but had to remind herself that she could still feel him, and he was breathing. He was still with them.

At least...

She hoped it was him...

Dad...?

He looked up at her as she came into his field of view. He looked exhausted, his eyes shadowed by the feelings he silently grappled with. She was happy to see relief in them, but her heart broke all over again at the agony he seemed desperate to conceal.

His voice was hoarse and shaky. Lav, a-are you okay?

Lav struggled to control her own voice. I-I'm fine, Dad... H-he didn't... a-attack me at all...

She kept part of her thought to herself.

I wish he would have...

She took a sudden sharp breath, trying to distract herself. There were higher priorities now. S-so what are we doing? Dad can't transform, so how do we get back? It's half the region away, or more!

Akoya had a serious look on her face. I'll get us there. I have to. Whatever it takes.

She closed her eyes and sighed. It was clear she wasn't certain about her ability to get them from here all the way to Lavender Town...

She began focusing. Alright, brace yourselves... Unlike the instantaneous teleportations they'd done in the past, Lav could feel her mother attempting to build up the power to accomplish this mission.

Maybe I can somehow share my power...

Feeling desperate to help, she began to focus her own energy toward the blue Mew. Akoya jolted very slightly, the only hint that she felt any change.

Then, after a moment...

They were gone...

~~~~~~

PREVIOUS NEXT (DEATH WARNING)

ARC START | CHRONO

I'm sorry.

This should've been a comic. This part deserves to be to be a comic, and someday I would like to come back and draw it. But right now, I just can't bring myself to, and I didn't want to let that stop progress.

I don't want to disappoint people, but... I dunno. I still have a slim hope of hitting my goal, and I don't want to get hung up and ruin that chance. I want to move on...

Anyway, I hope the read was enjoyable enough. And on the bright side, I've started work on the next part, so there's that at least! :)

[clarissaweasley-10]

Elwin:Alright so what do you do if a snake bites you? Keefe:Bite it back. Stina:Give it to Sophie Tam:Die Dex:Change it's colour Sophie:give it to Gisela. Fitz:...stop pressing buttons

[natelia-aldelliz]

more ghost!Roach with accidental necromancer Soap, their first interaction !

(please ignore the fact that i can't draw the same character twice lmao)

[dogd0m-charlie]

i hate having a uterus man my bf wants to give me head so so bad but I'm on my period :( i feel so evil I'm literally denying a cute little puppy his meal rn how am i supposed to sleep tonight .

[dykedvonte]

wanted to say I appreciate your nuanced takes on MW and especially Curly. i don't get the claim that the fandom is full of Curly apologists when majority (esp yt and tiktok) say he's worse than Jimmy. Yes there's commentary about bro culture defending people, he def messed up in trying to placate Jimmy (tbh "we'll fix this" sounded more like trying to keep someone prone to outbursts like Jim calm and not hurt Anya/himself) but I don't think he did nothing to help Anya, since she continued to confide in him and he had less than a week to resolve it before the crash (I also don't get everyone saying he knew for ages when it seems like Anya told him that same week). I get Jimmy's a pos but saying stuff like Curly should've known he'd crash the ship or that Jim had a criminal record he ignored, reducing them to obviously horrible villain and willfully ignorant sidekick feels like a disservice to the game. If your best friend turned out to be horrible, what would you do in a confined space in the span of a few days to respond? I'd say some of the horror comes from trying to do good but ultimately failing, Curly's state after the crash is meant to be tragic horror not revenge/punishment

Thank you and this is what I want to get across.

A lot of information we have to supplement when it comes to how long things have been happening on this current ship. I think people try to add on to the horror and negligence by making things more obvious so it can feel like it was easier to avoid when, true to life, its not. Jimmy clearly didn't deserve or appreciate what Curly did for him in getting him the job, but do you think if Jimmy was that big of a menace on Earth he would've given him a position where he could have that level of power over people's lives? There's something in the fact he specifically chose to pick a position so close to himself where he could watch Jimmy.

I hate the bro code argument because that is a whole can of worms people really don't get. That sort of mentality is born from the general respect and preference of male matter over female ones. Curly is clearly not that guy, he is absent minded about the issue and inadvertently dismissive but he clearly believes Anya, he just can't understand what she's going through. It's an onslaught of information that no one really reacts right to. Additonally, the entire discussion of her assualt plays to heavy into the idea that there is fault outside of the perpertratior when it comes to SA. It's too close if she only did this or if Curly had protected her better but the fact of the matter is Jimmy did what he did. He did it before any of the conversations with Anya about it and it's why her behavior seemed to change so drastically in those last two days.

He has other conflicting thought and while his role as a Captain should've taken over, people act like it's not a very human thing to have such a toxic presence cloud your judgement. It is never easy to separate friend from coworker once that connection is formed, you want to help them, especially if they were friend first and for a long while like in this case. It's not right, but people act like it would be easy when the game clearly points out that no choice is easy to make, especially when you have to make it for more than one person. You have the weigh the consequences, look at all the options and make a plan. People can headcanon and decide how long things where happening, but if we look at what we were presented through the characters eyes, the only person given time to do that was Jimmy.

He waited two months after the crash to appoint himself Captain. Every time a problem was brought up he immediately took action and refused to sit on it and find a better solution. I think it's important to look at the warped way Jimmy takes initiative where Curly didn't as it works as a good contrast of why you don't just run in to "fix" things. The quickest and easiest option may not be the safest or most beneficial. I think some thoughts on the game suffer from the black and white thinking the game doesn't operate on along with us being voyeurs. We see what exactly led to what but the characters don't. They don't have the hindsight and foresight we do and even ours is scrambled by the non-linear story telling.

Like it's hard to talk abuou those grey zones without sounding like an apologist because you're explaining why taking responsibility isn't easy. It's not and it's weird to act like it would be in a scenerio that led up to the events of the game knowing what we know. We see all these characters in such isolated moments with various things before, in between, after and even during we aren't privy too. The idea that Jimmy is worse than Curly heavily banks on the words Jimmy was saying to Jimmy before he crashed the ship. That whatever happened on the ship was his responsibility to bare, which is true due to his position. But, are they not still not responsible for taking the actions Curly then must bare?

Like i feel like people think that these are situation that become easier with age or when you are in a postion of authority and they aren't. You don't lose your biases or gain some sudden knowledge that makes it easier. It just becomes more tiring as you keep dealing with it. I would be first in line to say Curly fucked up and should've done more but the idea he knew how bad it could get or he really saw the worst in the people around him and ignored it pretty much ignores a huge aspect of his character and the game.

[skrunksthatwunk]

something he can't put into words.

[shalom-iamcominghome]

Is it too early for me to feel jewish rage because I'm still thinking about the rededication of a shul that two members of my shul are going to. I mentioned this in the tags of a previous post, but know why it's being rededicated to the jewish community? They had to sell the shul to the catholic church. That shul has existed for over a hundred years and a significant portion of its existence has been under ownership of the catholic church. And only now is that jewish community able to buy back their own shul. Maybe it hits harder now because I am in love with my shul, maybe it's because I know how hard it is to find a shul no matter how big the city is. Maybe I just think jewish things deserve to be with jews. Maybe I'm crazy!!

I'm just upset about it. And I know this is, like, 80% of jewish history, but it still makes me feel things.

[clowns0cks]

what the fuck don't even talk to me right now good omens is my favourite thing ever it helped me through a lot and now I get an ending in under 2 hours? this is literally devastating I sound like I'm choking every time I open my mouth to speak it's like the whole world is spinning so fast idk how to process this I'm barely breathing

[kerosene-saint]

I wish people didn't act like dd/lg or abdl were like pedophilia. not even into it and I'm a sfw age regressor (non community due to this problem) but like. ugh. and the problem is my views on it have changed so much over just this year. because guess what. whatever people do in their free time surrounding sex, as long as it is not genuinely illegal, should not fucking matter to you. it is not your fucking business to tell people you think their kink is gross and pedophilic, especially because it's not pedophilia. it is fine. to be uncomfortable with a kink page of a certain kind interacting with you. I get it. and there are some pretty mean people in those communities but guess what? there are mean people in EVERY COMMUNITY. and you do not have to relate that kink to pedophilia to say you'd prefer their kink blogs to not interact with whatever blog you have. but when you say shit like "pedos and also people into ddlg and abdl dni" it's annoying. you could say "ddlg/abdl blogs dni" absolutely fair. but saying don't interact abt an entire group of people of which you do not necessarily have the means of checking everyone for being in that community??? alright then. you have fun in puppy play isn't anything like fucking dogs but ddlg is like fucking children world.