#I can overanalyse the depth of it all

[buddieism]

tommy's character, bucktommy's inherent flaws, tommy & eddie as mirrors and buddie endgame; a (lengthy) meta analysis

honestly, what's really confirmed my feelings about tommy (and the imminent bucktommy bones -> buddie pipeline) is that there have now been multiple opportunities for the writers to actually make tommy a likeable/serious love interest for buck and they just…haven’t. because while fans are naturally going to overanalyse every little thing, the vast majority of the show's audience are regular viewers who consume the show at face value and don't think twice about it -- so if tommy was intended to be buck's endgame or anything remotely close to it, they'd absolutely want to make the most of his (very limited) screen time to present him in the best light they could. think about karen, the only non-main LI, and how she was introduced to us -- despite hen's cheating, we can see how dedicated karen and hen are to each other and how karen is a complex character in her own right who is immediately easy to root for and love.

comparatively, when we look at tommy's s7 appearances and specifically his interactions with buck, it becomes abundantly clear that there isn't really much depth to their relationship at all. which is fine! it's just... you know. fine. let's get into it.

following the cruise arc, we watch tommy through buck's eyes in 7x04 where he's basically wining and dining eddie -- flying him to vegas, getting them front row tickets to a fight, sparring with him in muay thai, playing pick up basketball with him -- tommy and eddie are so similar (which we'll come back to later), and we even get that line from eddie about how well they "click." as the audience, we are being subconsciously told to align tommy and eddie together -- and furthermore, we are told that tommy can easily make grand gestures when he wants to. now let's compare that to the bucktommy moments of the season.

bucktommy's first date: tommy makes a shady comment that would have outed buck if eddie or marisol caught onto it and then proceeds to abandon him on the sidewalk because he thinks buck isn't "ready" for a relationship with a man

i'll be objective here -- i understand in a show like 911 there's always going to be "unnecessary" relationship conflict for the sake of drama and i can also see how buck trying to play off their date as platonic to eddie might have put a bad taste in tommy's mouth. but we hear from tommy himself that he struggled with being open about his sexuality when he was at the 118 so he could have absolutely extended some sympathy towards buck for not wanting to come out on the spot to his best friend -- especially when tommy fully knows how important of a role eddie plays in buck's life. at the very least, he didn't have to leave buck alone on the curb. this isn't me trying to woobify buck because yeah, he's a grown man, he's fine -- but that doesn't mean it still isn't a bit of an asshole move.

the bachelor party: tommy doesn't dress up for the theme and dismisses buck when he's clearly disappointed about him doing so

tommy showing zero interest for the bachelor party buck planned is practically the writers waving a massive red flag in front of the camera -- him having to leave because he's on call is an understandable 'conflict' plot point but why not have him show up in an 80s themed outfit? it wouldn't have changed anything except that he and buck would have had a positive interaction; buck would have been happy that tommy cared enough to make that small gesture and it could have been a cute way to establish their relationship as one built on mutual effort. (btw, the bucktommy hospital kiss could be seen as a big gesture, sure -- but from a more practical viewpoint knowing how rushed this season had to be, it was also just an easy way for buck to "come out" to the rest of the 118 without having to spend too much episode airtime on it.)

the medal ceremony: tommy says 'enjoy it while it lasts' (which, LOL) and also is not shown reacting to buck receiving his medal. he also has a conversation with henren in a deleted scene.

again, i'm going to try to give tommy the benefit of the doubt -- i'm not saying he has to be sunshine and rainbows all the time and i have no issue with a character having a snarky/sarcastic side. but when his screentime is so minimal, every line of dialogue matters. and it's pretty damning that the writers aren't taking those few chances to give us something to appreciate about him. with buck, tommy makes a dismissive comment for literally zero reason, and with hen and karen, who are rightfully looking out for their friend, tommy refuses to take them seriously at all.

bucktommy's dinner in the finale: buck displays some vulnerability about losing bobby, and tommy... really doesn't seem to care.

honestly i refuse to rewatch this part of the ep because it really icks me out on another level but iirc: buck says he's glad bobby's okay because bobby is like the father he never had -> tommy says "your father's alive" -> something something joke about daddy issues. ignoring #that joke entirely, it's really insane to me that they have tommy even acknowledge the nuclear bomb that is buck's relationship with his parents. yes, we had a bit of a ham-fisted 'redemption arc' in s6 but that doesn't negate the buckley parents being absolutely heinous and the fact that buck verbalises how bobby played the role of the father figure because philip didn't -- all for tommy to basically deny that to his face -- is absurd. tommy has expressed on multiple occasions that he's jealous of the 118 family bond, so this line is just... very interesting to me.

now, let's recap all these events and bring eddie back into the mix!

post-bucktommy's first date, buck is more torn up about the fact that he lied to eddie than the actual date to the point that he has to vent to maddie about it. he then comes out to eddie, who is incredibly supportive (and oliver and ryan make some very curious acting choices indeed). eddie is reiterated as one of buck's most significant relationships.

pre-bachelor party, eddie is the one to suggest he and buck dress in matching (queer-coded) costumes. he then stays by buck's side at the party when everyone else leaves and although we'll never get to see it (tim minear i'm inside your walls👹), they sing an absurdly romantic karaoke song together. eddie is reiterated as one of buck's most significant relationships.

during the medal ceremony, when the camera pans to each member of the 118's love interest/family, it is eddie we are shown smiling at buck, not tommy. this is especially interesting considering we get buck reacting to tommy. i honestly can't get over how a reciprocated tommy reaction would have been an easy yet significant moment to cement bucktommy as a relationship, but they gave us eddie's instead (with chris in the background and marisol conveniently obscured, mind you). eddie is reiterated as one of buck's most significant relationships.

in the final episode, when eddie is experiencing his personal worst nightmare, buck is the one at eddie's side every step of the way. buck talks to christopher, buck reassures eddie (without judgement), and it's made clear that buck will be there for eddie, whatever he needs.

at every possible opportunity, we the audience are being implicitly told that eddie is buck's person. he is his place of support (buck having his more vulnerable coming out scene with eddie rather than his sister); he has buck's back (the bachelor party); he is his family (medal ceremony reaction), and ultimately, this goes both ways (finale).

some other things worth noting: when buck has his coming out scene with maddie, she tells him he's confused about his feelings in a way that seems to indicate she's talking about his feelings towards eddie ("if you there's something you need to tell eddie, you will"). in bobby's conversation with buck in the firehouse, he's verbally supportive of tommy and even asks if buck is going to see him, but buck goes to eddie's house instead. these were deliberate choices made by the writers; eddie has been consistently intertwined in bucktommy's relationship both overtly and subtextually throughout the entirety of s7. and let's not even get into the whole 'evan' thing, because that could be a whole other post in itself.

from the first moment we start to learn about tommy's character (beyond his... coloured past), we find out that he and eddie are practically mirrors. why not make tommy and buck share similar interests? why not give them something to bond over? why present tommy and eddie as almost identical in every way? because tommy is a placeholder for eddie. buck's initial bisexuality journey can't happen with eddie when eddie still hasn't come to terms with his own feelings. so, in the meantime, tommy is the "safe" choice in buck's mind because buck has nothing to lose with tommy whereas he's got everything to lose with eddie. buck can't confront what he truly wants yet because the risk factor is far greater and it's been repeatedly asserted that buck has an issue with people in his life leaving -- he would never do anything to jeopardise his relationship with eddie.

but ultimately (and in my opinion, fairly soon), we are going to get that moment where it "clicks" for buck and he realises that it is eddie he has feelings for. and when that happens, there's basically only one way it can go. we know buck can't keep secrets from eddie; we know eddie is going into s8 feeling "isolated"; we know tim loves making his characters suffer before they can be happy. in my mind, the narrative is going to go something like this: buck feelings realisation -> pining buck era -> eddie healing journey and a reevaluation of what buck means to him -> some insane life-threatening situation that really doubles down on how buck and eddie care more about each other than anyone else because it is 9-1-1 at the end of the day -> love confession induced by their dramatic near-death experience -> #BUDDIE_CANON !

when we factor in how there was a possibility of eddie having the sexuality arc this season instead, how tim has said buddie is one of his favourite dynamics of the show, and how supportive both oliver and ryan are of the ship, i really can't see how everything isn't building to buddie endgame. every other main pairing of the show has had seasons of development, of conflict, of bonding moments. buck and eddie have gone through that with each other time and time over (tsunami/lawsuit/shooting arc etc), which is why every other random love interest that's introduced for either of them falls flat in comparison. they quite literally are exactly what the other person needs; buck wants the stability of a home, a family, and unconditional love; eddie wants someone he can trust, a caretaker for his son but also a partner. buddie is the ship the audience wants to root for, because we know they work! now that we have canonically bisexual buck and eddie finally having to face his complicated feelings about losing shannon, buddie isn't just the logical conclusion -- it's the inevitable one.

[misc-obeyme]

Wait a minute, Barbatos listens to heavy metal? In which of the games is the sacred chat that included this juicy little fact mentioned? Is it a daily chat or is it obtainable from a card?

Affinity with heavy metal suits him very well, honestly.

I absolutely love when a character's personality is founded on a particular 'theme,' a specific range of generally interconnected interests, as well as a determined set of qualities—only for an unrelated/unexpected trait, quirk, hobby, talent or interest to sneak up and add a quaint pop of entertainment and relatability to their person.

Barbatos adores tea, likes cleaning, and tends to tiny demons, which are all things that give a sort of serene, domestic tinge to his figure. Yet, he indulges in the genre of heavy metal. And I think that that's such a satisfying, realistic shade to his personality palette because the truth is that one individual can hold so many differences within them, and some of those differences may at times be starkly opposing. And that is so intriguing.

Except in this case, I don't think Barbatos's appreciation for heavy metal is 'unrelated' to him per se or even a difference at all; in fact, it's woven with his being and who he is. Because of course, despite the calmness, fondness for tea, and intricate skills in making all sorts of sweet and savoury delicacies—aspects that craft an almost soft, meditative aura around him—he's also a thinker with a sense of wisdom and a badass who displays a multitude of talents while appreciating a musical genre famous for its loud intensity (which at first glance 'opposes' his general calm image and eloquent manner of speech).

So this is where I point out that this very 'difference' is perfect, since it's also a core similarity in and of itself; after all, Barbatos is intense and thoughtful, just like heavy metal itself (even though the genre has this unfair, unfortunate stereotype of being 'aggressive noise only'). What I mean to say is, this preference Barbatos has is merely an extension of his self and a representation of the parts of it that are not immediately apparent. It may seem startling at the beginning, but in my opinion, it makes so much sense that he would appreciate heavy metal.

He has lived for a very, very long time and that existence came with thousands upon thousands of experiences that shaped his mindset, temperament and wisdom, as well as gave him depth. I assume he found that heavy metal resonates with him in some ways. Perhaps it is not only admiration for the deep lyrics or relation to them, but also how the intense volume might help him vicariously express certain emotions.

In all honesty, it would be nice to see what young Barbatos was like. Now it's just rats that make him lose his marbles and go from 0 to 100 in the course of a millisecond. His anger is often pretty much covert otherwise. How interesting it would be to catch a glimpse of his wild days of youth—Barbatos being outwardly wrathful, spitting out what's on his mind without restraint, immediately resorting to violence, and even getting jealous because he's still young and hasn't yet attained the wisdom and maturity all that experience has to offer.

This is way longer than I intended it to be, but the subject piqued my interest, I love rock and admire the depth of thought in it and heavy metal, and overanalysing and overthinking are best friends of mine lol

The chat is from OG and I'm like... 99.999% sure that it's with the group The Fantastic Three. I remember Lucifer apologizing for Asmo who decided to perform some heavy metal at an event or something. And Barbatos was like, actually I like heavy metal. And Lucifer and Diavolo were both like ???

But for the life of me, I cannot find it. I thought it was a daily chat, but I can't find it. Maybe it's from a card? Does anyone know exactly which chat that is??

Anyway, I agree with everything you're saying. I very much headcanon that Barbatos has a lot of depth that we simply don't see. This because he hides it deliberately. I think he does this because he feels he has to have a certain demeanor, not just as Diavolo's butler and as a role model to him, but also because he feels he was too wild in his past. He wants to project that image of perfect calm and competence.

Despite all that, Barbatos is still a being with emotions and I really like the idea that heavy metal in particular speaks to him. Listening to it allows him to sit with some feelings that he normally represses. It helps him work through them instead of letting them fester.

I also think an indication of a well written character is when that character has unexpected traits. It's impossible to make a character as nuanced as a real person, but you can create the illusion of it by giving them depth. Barbatos feels like he has so much happening beneath the surface, so many pieces to him that we haven't discovered yet. It's one of the reasons I love him so much.

Who is he when he lets himself go? I have spent too much time thinking about that.

And how interesting it would be to see how he was when he was younger...

[crowleysgirl56]

IT’S FINALLY HERE SQUIRRELS!

OMG I’ve been biting my nails for weeks on how he is going to react. Already from the thumbnail we can guess that he is not happy and has reacted the exact same way as us.

So let’s dive into my highlights of his reactions. As always, under the cut to avoid spoilers. Here we go.

- Already from Danny’s opening monologue he’s guessed exactly how most of this episode will go in terms of plot beat and story structure. But it is clear he doesn’t know about the 90 minute finale.

- Love how Danny’s immediate response to Crowley’s heaven disguise is “You’ve only made him hotter!” Funnily enough he mentions “it looks like he invented whiskey”. Funny considering David Tennant did that add for whiskey…

- Danny is everyone when he heavily sighs when Maggie accidentally invites the demons in.

- Danny finally gets his payoff about the fly being the key.

- About Beelzebub and Gabriel. He so casually says “I kinda want them to fall in love and I’ll murder anyone who disagrees with me”. Yeah, well…at least ONE angel and demon couple got to do that and go off together! I also love how within 6 minutes he is 100% invested in their relationship.

- “David Forgettit. Azirawho”. HOW DARE YOU SIR!

- Good Omens fandom: deep dives into why no one recognises The Metatron when he’s in his corporal form. Danny when the Metatron enters the books shop: Who’s this guy? Is this God? Did they recast God?! (Crowley then says the last time he saw him he was a big floating head) Oh it’s Zordon! Proving that, yep, it is THAT simply to trick everyone, no deep dives necessary.

- Danny points out Muriel is holding the Crow Road, but then doesn’t try to deep dive into why that’s important. And yeah, if you didn’t know what that book is it doesn’t really mean anything, but looking back at that scene, it is framed so deliberately that it HAS to mean something.

- And now we finally get to it. Danny’s ENTIRE journey of reacting to the final fifteen. I could devote an entire post to everything that he says and does. The clutching of his chest and chair, the pleading of David Tennant to stop being such a great actor, his joy and heartbreak and yelling of “THEY KISSING!”, the depths of despair of wanting to start up smoking, to getting really drunk even though it’s 11am, and to becoming addicted to cocaine. WE. ARE. ALL. STILL. THERE. MY FRIEND!

- It’s funny how Danny went from being such an advocate for Aziraphale this entire time to just holding his head in his hands exclaiming “what the fuck I can’t even, I can’t even, why would you do that?” right at the very end.

Danny’s whole reaction is interesting in that it’s such an immediate reaction, he doesn’t have the luxury like us who have spent the last year and a bit overanalysing everything with a fine tooth comb. Because it’s almost like, maybe that is how we should be reacting? Love to hear everyone’s thoughts on this and his reaction.

And that’s the end. Hopefully he will react to the final 90 minutes once it’s released. What a journey. Now, I really feel like I need to rewatch the entire show over again.

[flightofthejackdaw]

I just had a potentially beautiful potentially horrifying brain blast about KH4.

So Riku's trip to Quadratum has a lot of hallmarks of Cinderella this time, including being sent by Fairy Godmother and his Prince potentially not recognizing him. This is something you're probably already aware of.

The Kingdom Key and Kingdom Key D are based on the Keys to the Kingdom of Heaven from Catholicism. They also were created by Riku's heart and now belong to Mickey Mouse (Realm of Light) and Sora (Quadratum.) This is probably something else you probably already know.

The Master of Masters has the ability to summon someone else's keyblade into his own hands, as seen with Young Xehanort in Dark Road, implying that he might be able to steal keyblades. You probably already know this as well.

Do you know how the song at the end of Cinderella goes? The one that plays when Cinderella and Prince Charming dance together after finding each other and confessing their love? The song is "So This is Love" and it's very short, but it contains this sweet little line:

"The Key to All Heaven Is Mine"

I think that, at the end of KH4, either Riku or MoM will have either the Kingdom Key or the Kingdom Key D. Probably the Kingdom Key. Probably MoM, since he needs a Keyblade. And poor Sora will have to contend with his self-worth issues about not being important if he doesn't have his Keyblade to save people. We might get a Riku confession, or at least a Riku admitting to himself that he's in love... but the counterbalance might be Sora's self-worth.

What do you think? Am I maybe reaching a bit too much?

Wow, that is amazing! I’ve definitely thought about the Kingdom Key D but wasn’t sure if it was ever going to get brought up again. But you’ve just cracked open a major can of worms there, and it MAKES SENSE!

Also the thing with MoM being able to summon others Keyblades helps a pet theory I have that No Name was never his Keyblade but was always Luxu’s. That either MoM has a different Keyblade or doesn’t have one at all, which would be interesting

It does sound like reaching, but this is Kingdom Hearts we’re talking about and this kind of insane depth is to be expected and this “reaching” is exactly what Nomura wants us to do. As overanalysing and looking deeply into what he has written is such a big part of what makes Kingdom Hearts, Kingdom Hearts!

I’ll be keeping this idea of yours in mind when we get KH4. If you’re right you are so insanely smart, and we’re about to get our own hearts completely trampled over if this ends you being true

[lizziespoem]

intimacy of being understood | nanamin ͏⸺ one shot

͏⸺ the intimacy of being understood, untouchable, unique and barely to understand, an hidden act of art reshaped to a favor of the gods, to crawl under the skin that is covering the depths of our hearts, we know so many things, yet we never understand ourselves, and to able to push the skin aside was so simple, yet so magnificent. Perhaps we craved more to be understood rather than being loved, to understand the vulnerability behind every confession, the growth of every movement, the association of connection and progress and the acknowledgment of existing.

and besides all your knowledge, philosophy and intelligence, you never figured out the act of being yourself, you didn't understand how you worked, why you acted like you did and why the thoughts were circling through your pretty head, but nanami did.

the way your fingertips carefully pulled on the simple bracelet around your wrist, the way you constantly yawed to get more oxygen into your lungs, the way you got quieter and your lips got tired of wearing your beautiful smile, the way your eyes followed every single movement to overanalyse every interaction and the way your cheeks blushed as you took small sips of your drink.

"mind if I steal my gorgeous woman for a moment?" Nanami interjected into the conversation of you and some other college’s with one of his charming smiles on his lips, as his he carefully placed his left hand onto your lower back, creasing the silky material of your elegant dress.

No one could ever refuse anything to nanami when he got that innocent charming smile on his lips, the kind of smile that holded his soul, the kind of smile that just needed three seconds to relieve the cruelty of the world and even if the light faded, his smile stayed.

"am I that transparent for you?" you whispered softly with an innocent smile on your lips while Nanami's hand stroked over your coccyx as he guided you outside, between the chatting people, out of the crowed room filled with stuffy air and the smell of alcohol. The other hand of Nanami rubbed over the little beard stubble, which his razor hadn’t caught and the charming grin didn’t faded as his eyes looked down to study you for a brief moment as he speaks up "you don’t need to tell me how you feel. I can see it for miles"

The loudness muffled after Nanami cautiously closed the glass patio door behind the two of you.

"I know it’s difficult for you when all these greedy looks are on you" the tall blonde man said as he watched you leaning your body slightly over the railing, admiring the landscapes and enjoying the calmness, away from all the people, letting yourself feel the comfort you needed.

Nanamin always rejected to be understood and being loved, yet he couldn’t help but fall the crucifixion of being loved by you, the torments of his mental awareness to differentiate the deed of the gods or the practical joke of the mischief devil, since you were everything he had ever prayed for, too good to be a gift of the gods and too innocent to be a sin of the devil. But if I’m between the spectacle of the world and the ever-changing state of things and the inherent fiction of everything, of the false importance exhibited by all realities, he always pleaded to wait to find you, in every myth and fiction, he dreamed among shadows and ruins, crawled through the coldest emptiness till the fullest ecstasy, just to find you.

You were terribly afraid of being known, yet desperate to be understood and Nanami was willing to learn every aspect about you.

"I know it's loud up here and way too bright for you" he mumbled against your scalp before he placed a gently kiss on top of your head, before he leans with his back against the railing studying the way the cold air blushes your cheeks and the dimmed light complimented your eyes.

Almost as if there was hiding a hint of absurdity, the tall man lost himself, forgetting who he was in this blurry reality while the intensity of sensation stunned his senses and all that was clear to him was you, the smudged dark eyeliner and rare blush on your cheeks, the fresh manicure and the elegant ring around your finger he had gifted to you as a promise, the messy hair and the little strands, which float around your face in the light wind. If you were a sin developed by the hands of the devil, Nanami would have fall on his knees and would make any agreement with the underworld, he didn't cared about how many love letters he must write for you, if he had to learn to play guitar to impress you, if he would have to read to you every night or if he had to work for the devil himself, he would do anything for you.

“sometimes I think you know me better than I know myself” a soft chuckle left your mouth, looking up through your dark lashes as your hands clenched around the cold railing and Nanami would've lied if he would denied the emotional chaos you caused inside of him as you looked at him with those eyes.

Obsessively, incessantly, perpetual and with maddering hunger he longed for your heart, manuscripts written down by his dreams about every movement you made to avoid his suffocation otherwise he would never stop talking about you, insane enough to believe it wasn´t enough to see you every moment with his clear consciousness, willing to never sleep again just so he wouldn't lose you from his sight. Nanami was never afraid of heights, yet this love seems so deep that he was afraid to fall, because you gave him something he can miss and now he knows forever what he'll miss when you leave.

A charming grin lifted the corners of his mouth as his thumb brushed over your little wrinkles around your lips “yet I don't know enough of you”

"You don't?" you mocked him jokingly, causing one of you dangerously gorgeous smiles lighting up your face, fading away these obstinate musical tones banging on the glass door as the tall blonde man nodded pensively and stroked with his thumb over your soft glossy lips, smudging a bit the lip gloss from your lips “You're full of passions and talent, yet to blind to see it in yourself, you hide so many beautiful words under your tongue, still you apologize for speaking at all and somewhere in your life someone broke your heart so deeply, that you're afraid of loving yourself, but even if I know a hundred versions of you, there are at least a thousand left to love”

The wrinkles around the corner of your lips illuminate as you placed a gentle kiss on the fingertip of his thumb before he raised his voice calmly again “You know which version I like the most till now is the one that still dances even when the song is long over and the one who, when the world is gray again, paints everything in color again with a brush, who never leaves, even when we argue”

“maybe, there is a version you won't love” you whispered while you looked through your lashes into his eyes and a raucous laugh escaped his mouth as he shook his head “it's so exaggeratedly easy to love you”

And there it was, a kiss so delicate yet vulnerable, godly with closed eyes, helplessly almost like a miserable misery, yet you both had become ravenously hungry for the taste of each other that you weren’t afraid to get burned, two mouths melted into each other, not afraid to swallow the poison of the devil.

© 2023 LIZZIESPOEM. please do not copy any of my writing and translate or repost onto any other sites.

[emotionallychargedtowel]

Utsukushii Kare master post

With Utsukushii Kare: Eternal becoming available on streaming in Japan and rumors of international streaming distribution on the horizon, I thought this might be a good time to do a roundup post of all of my meta writing on the series so far. There's quite a bit of it. Between the complexity of the psychological themes in this series and my capacity for hyperfocus, I ended up with a lot to say.

In case it doesn't go without saying, this post is subject to change as I continue to post on this topic.

The psychological paradoxes of Utsukushii Kare

This is a series of posts (the current plan is to write three installments) about what it says on the tin: paradoxical psychological dynamics in Utsukushii Kare. These are things about the characters that may seem contradictory at first but can be accounted for by digging deeper into some psychological concepts. These posts are focused on the series (both seasons) but will draw from the movie and from the novel and related stories when they illustrate points about the series.

Part 1: Covert grandiosity and finding status through idealization - A pretty deep dive into 1) the subtle ways Hira shows that while his self-image can be highly negative in some ways, in other respects he feels superior to others and 2) how by elevating Kiyoi’s status and humbling himself in comparison, Hira attains a different kind of status.

An addendum of sorts to part 1: Hira's parents and his self-defeating tendencies - Some guesswork about how Hira's parents could have contributed to his self-defeating personality, with some further discussion of specific self-defeating strategies he uses in his relationship with Kiyoi and elsewhere.

Utsukushii Kare through the lens of pursuer-distancer dynamics and related psychological concepts:

The pursuer-distancer dyad & how it applies to the world of BL - a primer on this psychological concept and how it applies to BL generally, with a brief reference to how this concept applies to Utsukare (also touches on Semantic Error and talks in detail about an example from To My Star 2). This one isn't super focused on Utsukushii Kare but is pretty de rigeur for understanding my UK posts on this topic.

Paradoxical roles; or, I think I finally figured out the pursuer-distancer dynamic in Utsukushii Kare - This post comes after some of the posts listed below but I recommend reading it first as this is really where (I think) I cracked the code on this aspect of the story.

Pursuer-distancer roles & attachment style in Utsukushii Kare, Part 1: Hira - In-depth discussion of Hira's role in the pursuer-distancer dyad, his attachment style, and his personality

Pursuer-distancer roles and attachment style in Utsukushii Kare Part 2: Kiyoi - In-depth discussion of Kiyoi's role in the pursuer-distancer dyad, his attachment style, and his personality

Re-evaluating pursuing & distancing in Utsukushii Kare season 1 - super detailed post working out my thoughts about pursuing and distancing in season 1

On the way Sakai Mai (the series' director) uses seme left, uke right framing and its significance in BL and other Japanese media:

Using an example from the s2e1 with the girl who hits on Hira at a party (via a reblog of a gifset from @nanons)

On the way Sakai flips Hira's and Kiyoi's position in the frame in two versions of the same scene and what it tells us about its significance

How the persistent/cute trope plays out in Utsukushii Kare season 2, plus related overanalyses of the big season 2 finale kiss:

The persistent and the cute (how "persistent" and "cute" are code words with specific meanings in BL/yaoi/other drama and manga genres/Japanese culture more broadly)

Analyzing the season 2 finale kiss in light of seme left/uke right framing and the persistent/cute trope (in a reblog of a gif post by @nanons)

Reblogging @bl-bracket to lobby for the season 2 finale kiss, with more overanalysis

Fragrance nerd discussion:

This bittersweet fragrance - on the significance of osmanthus/tea olive in Utsukushii Kare season 2, with additional information on the possible significance of the fragrance of osmanthus and perfumes that are either osmanthus soliflores or feature prominent osmanthus notes

Posts on specific season 2 episodes:

initial thoughts about S2e1

Additional (informal) thoughts on s2e1

S2e1 rundown

Hira's incongruous/misaligned affect at the end of s2e1

S2e2 rundown

on S2e2, including pursuer-distancer dynamics and seme left, uke right

Utsukushii Kare S2E4: “face me straight on” (mostly discussing relationship dynamics pointed out in topic-specific metas)

on Utsukushii Kare: Eternal:

Kiyoi and Anna: on Kiyoi’s friendship with Anna and its significance for his personal growth

[messrsrarchives]

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about 👀❤️

ask game

snily and the idea that snape is creepily obsessed.

i can see the tomatoes flying but we KNEW i'd bring snily up. we KNEW. snape was not creepily obsessed with her.

he grew up abused by a muggle and lily was a muggleborn that showed him kindness and he showed her magic. they built the bridge between their two worlds together and showed each other they could belong. he wasn't creepily obsessed, he had a Friend. and he watched that friend get put into a house that rivals his, and then listened to his house spew rhetoric that he's SO susceptible too - one, because he's told he Belongs there and he's only ever belonged with lily and two, because when they say "muggles are bad and ruin wizarding society" snape thinks of his wizarding mum "standing aside" (in his mind) whilst a muggle abuses him. SO susceptible.

and their friendship fractures but it's so important to the both of them, and when lily asks him to leave her alone after SWM? he does! he leaves her alone. if he were creepily obsessed, he would have tried harder to get her back.

he joins the death eaters and he doesn't just say to save lily, no. he says save them all. and even if he DID just say save lily? justified no? i don't think he's expecting dumbledore to walk over to their house and say "sorry james, you and your newborn child have to stay" ???? OFC NOT 😭 it's like when you run, and you try to speak as you catch your breath - only the headwords come out, not all the details, but if you go "water. thirsty." the person holding the waterbottle will hear "i need water im thirsty" YOU KNOW????? like NO, he didn't mean kill her husband and child omg, ofc his mind goes to his oldest friend.

and then the whole "he hugged her dead bod-" NO HE DIDNT ‼️ jkr fell out with the guy she characterised snape after and added that scene in afterwards. it's not in the books and it was a petty addition that makes no sense. and then! his patronus matching hers isn't a sign of obsession, a patronus simply means positive feelings, and even then it's complicated. remadoras? matches because of love. jilys? matches because of love. harry and james???? matches because of some tragic possibility that he COULD have been happy with his parents. snape and lily? they match because when it comes to Positive Feelings, lily is all he's had and whether romantic or not, it's not obsessive.

and for lily? oh snily is SO important for her !!! whilst her family fades her out for her abilities, snape shows her that she isn't a freak and that she belongs. and then that trust is broken later on and she has to rethink everything. and then !!! we always talk about how lily is her love but, much like the patronus point, love isn't always positive.

her unwavering love is the reason that whilst he goes down the wrong path, whilst he gets worse morally and whilst he hurts people, She Sticks By Him. she sticks by him until he does something to *her* and that adds so much depth to her character that is just lost if we reduce snily down to "he was creepily obsessed with her"

her love ended a war but her love also kept her close to snape for so long until he hurt her directly, and that's so complex.

and don't even get me started on the whole "if harry was a girl...." ew !!! you're so weird !!! you're so so so weird !!! (also not to,,, ignite the snape/james feud as someone who likes both but if we're gonna talk about SA,,,, let's address the canonical SA performed against snape by james, not some theoretically SA that's just weird to think about and pose it as a possibility for someone who gave his life to protect harry and suffered abuse at home... what a weird theory to have)

i could go on and on but i'll shut up - a friendship that went wrong does not mean the entire friendship was tainted. absolutely, yes, you look back on the friendship and overanalyse and look for signs, maybe you look back on memories through a lense of pain not nostagia, but the memories still happened the way they did. they were friends, regardless of how it ended, and he accepted her refusal to continue that friendship.

also! when i spoke about this on tiktok so many comments were like "he bullied kids!" "he called her a slur!" which yes! he did! this isn't about how good of a person he was, because he was a shitebag, but he Had A Friend. and that's not creepy.

[etherealmach1ne]

- Intro Post ⋆｡°✩

| Hello! My name is Ori/Bee/Star or V1 and i am 20. This is primarily my otherkin/personal blog, however ill probably post whatever. ^^

i'm an artist and occasional animator, i also do livestreams every so often. i love drawing robots or fanart of things i like, i also draw furries. I am autistic, adhd and likely (quiet) bpd.

i am agender, my pronouns are they/he/it/bot. i do not mind most gendered terms (although i tend to prefer the masc ones, there is exceptions) so you can use he or "look at the little guy!" the way you would if you saw a little robot wearing a fancy hat. Im also Greysexual and Queer.

My Kins/Kintypes (will go more in depth another time)

Robotkin/Machinekin - Nonspecific, i feel this with anything that could be referred to as a machine, electronic or mechanical. Although with robots im most attached to ones with non-humanoid faces. This was the first kin-thing i discovered about myself!

Angelkin - i believe this is also nonspecific, but im most drawn to multiple winged ones, the statues of angels, or depictions of them being abstract like beings of pure light.

Fictionkin - v Here is a list of my fictional character kins v

Starscream (Transformers) - My highest(and most intense) kin, mainly G1 starscream or similar versions (earthspark and some comics). He is incredibly important to me. Skyfire also plays an important comfort role to me because of this kin, I do ship them so i am incredibly attached to them both.

Bumblebee (Transformers) - Much less intense of a kin, i mainly kin G1 or the bumblebee movie version (or similar ones in some comics once again)

V1 (ULTRAKILL) - Realised this kin at the same time i realised i was robotkin! Was also a very intense kin, however its calmed down as im hyperfixated on starscream/transformers at the moment.

Questioning/not sure

Starkin - This may link with Angelkin, as i do see stars and angels as connected/appearing similar.. not sure.

Birdkin - Same thing, i do very much relate with having wings. some of their behaviours i also feel attached to, but im unsure if its just because i associate them with other kins..

Deerkin - Ive had certain shifts that seem to align with deer, ive always been quite drawn to them.

Foxkin - i connect a lot with the way foxes act and used to identify with them a lot in my early teen years, some shifts ive had could also align with them.

Interests (some, at least..)

Transformers (current special interest) | Robots/anything mechanical (also special interest)

Space/Sci-fi | Character analysis (or overanalysing..) | Art/Animation (of course)

(Any kind of) Science ( i am not smart enough to understand it fully but im autistic enough to find it exciting regardless /hj)

Video games in general (ULTRAKILL, Undertale/Deltarune, Fnaf, Splatoon, Portal, to name a few) | Phasmophobia/Lethal Company/Among us

Clowns/Jesters | Markiplier (his videos and his projects) | Good omens

Other

With fictional kins i do tend to feel discomfort with doubles (people who share the same kin) however you can still interact, i do try to look past the discomfort.

DNI if youre a weirdo (proship, homophobe/transphobe, racist, ect.)

i'll likely never post anything entirely nsfw here, but im not sure about suggestive stuff,. it will be tagged if i do, so if you dont want to see that it should be easily filtered out! i'll likely leave it all below a "read more" anyway just to be safe.

Dont be shy to interact! whether its to ask questions or anythin!

[l-e-morgan-author]

Love in Hands Made For Gentleness

One of the themes in this book are the different forms of love, and - like many others - I think about the Greek words to ensure I explore it the way I want to. It's an interesting thing to think about, how each form of love is manifested, and is something I hold very close to my heart, because after all 'these three abide, but the greatest of these is love'. Given that both faith and hope are also crucial elements (hope gets more of a talking-about, but that's inextricably tied into faith as it is for me), it's important that I don't forget about their greater counterpart, love. I wanted to break it down and discuss a bit about how the different forms of love are displayed.

This necessarily involves spoilers, so if you want to scroll right past and remain unspoiled, feel free to! (And yes, I do indeed overanalyse my own works, what of it?) Also note: trigger warnings consistent with the book itself, since some of the topics discussed may be distressing (if you find discussion of topics like suicide distressing, a) please take care of yourself, and b) this probably won't be the book for you).

So in no particular order:

Philia

Philia is the love of friends, platonic love. This is really where Vaniah and Anneka start out, in a way - very good friends, very affectionate, and entirely platonic. Before we get into the more complicated feelings as they grow closer after their marriage, one of my aims with this book is to emphasise the importance of platonic love, as well as its depth, and that it absolutely doesn't need to romantic to be very close and extremely important to the people in it. For Vaniah, Anneka is the most important person in his life, even before their marriage.

Eros

Eros is the interesting one here to me - the passionate romantic or sexual love. It's definitely important to this story and these characters; Vaniah has some trauma around all of this to work through, but ultimately, they're married, they're going to be doing married people shenanigans. (Not on page, don't worry. There'll be discussions around that topic, as necessary, but since it's not a topic I really want to touch for personal reasons I doubt it'll have a great deal of page time.) It's important, but most of the hints around it will probably be accidental; I know I've shared excerpts that are just them playing around and being silly, and certain people look at them and see sexual undertones I never intended. Ah well.

Agape

Agape is the most important love here, I think - the self-sacrificing, selfless love. It's unconditional, and very much represents the bond between Vaniah and Anneka as it heals. Both are willing to do whatever it takes for the other to grow better and closer to God, at least in theory, and over time that translates to wanting their own healing in order to stop grieving the other person (more relevant for Vaniah than Anneka). At a certain point with a lot of mental problems, I feel like one stops caring about healing, and it's a struggle sometimes to remember why you would try, because it's easier to just exist and not try to improve. Over time, though, Vaniah and Anneka help one another to heal from their respective problems. They won't go away completely, of course, but whatever they can do to help, they do, and I love them for it. Anneka, for instance, is very willing to hear about dark, graphic thoughts and see some very graphic things, if it will help Vaniah (like when she helps him to care for self-inflicted wounds, which understandably deeply upsets her). Despite how it may make her feel, she's determined to continue to love him no matter what, and that's something she emphasises, especially when he gets existential and at one point even suggests she should divorce him and let him die by his own hand. (She refuses, reminds him of her love and God's love, and pulls out verses to support her point.)

Storge

Storge is the familiar love, love of family. This is one most represented by Anneka's bond with her brother, Ben. While Vaniah has two siblings, one is already dead by the start of the story, and the other, Susan, doesn't get a great deal of page time. Because the story is told from Anneka's point of view, the two most important male characters are Vaniah and Ben. Her relationship with Ben mimics my own bond with my siblings. I wanted him to be her protector, to some extent, until that role is handed more to Vaniah. Though she can stand for herself, Anneka still needs the love and support of her family and friends, just like we all do. For Vaniah and Anneka, the support and protection goes both ways.

Mania

Mania is another interesting one, and not one I'd really considered specifically until writing this post. As part of his mental health journey, Vaniah sometimes veers close to obsession, or stumbles into it completely. He is at times violent, but never towards Anneka, only himself. There's a spice of codependency as well, as they both know he would have committed suicide years earlier if it hadn't been for her, and at times, at his lowest, he resents her for it. There are a lot of toxic emotions tied up into this relationship, but together (and with the help of others from their church) they work through it and out the other side.

Ludus

This is another form of love I hadn't considered until writing this post, but I'm glad I did. It's an integral part of Vaniah and Anneka's relationship, and serves to lighten the admittedly heavy tone of this book. They have a lot of fun together, even despite the terrible darkness that sometimes assails one or both of them, and it's important to remember. It's also tied into the banter between Anneka and Ben, which can sometimes be pretty similar to the way Vaniah and Anneka interact. But they absolutely can't be sad or depressed all the time, because that would be a terrible book to read. I need to work more on putting this in, and the balance between light and dark, so that it doesn't feel jarring or confusing, or different to the tone of the rest of the book.

Pragma

Pragma is an enduring love, and it's extremely important to their relationship. Both Vaniah and Anneka have to make compromises to make things work, and as they mature and heal from their traumas and disorders, they learn to work together better, and the codependency they previously experienced is transformed into a strong, healthy and abiding bond in Christ.

Philautia

Oh look, another one I hadn't expressly thought about before this post! Philautia is the love of self. This one is interesting because it ties into my opinion that both 'self love' and 'self hatred' are expressions of self obsession, which isn't really a very good thing, obviously. At the start of the story, Vaniah absolutely can't get past his feelings about himself, his guilt over what he was forced to do or chose to do, and the way he perceives himself at that point. However, as it progresses, he learns to forgive himself (there's one scene in which Anneka argues that God has forgiven him if he has repented, and he bitterly retorts that all he needs to do is forgive himself, for he has repented a thousand times), and finally to move on after years of feeling stuck in one place. This is only really possible after he hits the lowest point and attempts suicide, and finally makes the decision that he will never end his own life, no matter what. He eventually reaches a point at which he is less self-obsessed (tying it in to the development of agape love as well), and is able to look more outwards without obsessing over his own behaviour; he doesn't love himself, but he has learned to accept himself and to largely stop punishing himself for his own existence, which is what is tied into his significant habit of self-harm. (Which he does eventually manage to stop completely; I'm not sure that's entirely possible for some or even most people, at least given how established it is as a coping mechanism for him, but there might be a little bit of wishful thinking helping this one along, and that's okay.)

So those are the different forms of love as expressed in this story! I could probably talk a lot more about them if I sat down and thought about it for even longer, but I really shouldn't. I have an exam to study for. God be with you.

In a slightly edited form, this post will also be available on my website, lemorganauthor.wordpress.com, shortly. (Edit: the post is now available at this link which I hope works because I've never done a hyperlink on tumblr before.)

[goldfish-or-smthing]

im going to count and list and then probably overanalyse the shakespeare references in season 2 because i have to do something with the english i learnt in school right?!

just finished episode 2, so far we have:

2x01 - "a shakespearian fucking tragedy" (said by nate) 2x01 - "it's like saying macbeth in a theatre" (said by ted) 2x02 - "perchance to dream here" (said by beard) 2x02 - "heavy is the head that wears the crown visor" (said by doc sharon to ted)

without much in depth thought these all kinda have the connection of sleep: "heavy is the head.." is from Henry IV (it's technically "uneasy is the head" but is generally quoted as heavy) and is from a speech about the characters insomnia as a war approaches, "perchance to dream here" is from Hamlet- from hamlets classic "to be or not to be" monologue, and obvs has a connection to sleep and a major theme of macbeth is sleep.

which is interesting, but then again shakespeare wrote a lot about sleep so it could be a coincidence...

the shakespeare references could also all be hinting at nates betrayal at the end of s2 since thats a theme that shakespeare wrote about in almost all of his plays. then again i cant help but feeling like the references probably mean more than just that.

see you tomorrow for more of me overanalysing the shakespeare references in ted lasso! (probably in more depth because the more references i get the more i can hopefully find some sort of pattern?)

[bibibbon]

⚠️Ramble incoming⚠️

Personally, I think loid already had previous knowledge about psychology and psychiatry to begin with. Loid had to have the knowledge of those topics and in depth as it helped him truly impersonate people and helped him read people like a book. We see loid use forms of psychology in his work quite often whether that be from his quick thinking mode or how he learns to quickly impersonate and rationally guess other peoples next moves.

Throughout his years of being a spy we see that his knowledge and methods of talking to people aren't quite "normal". He seems to overanalyse everything he is given and while that has usually shown him great results while he is on missions it now creates a series of misunderstandings whenever he tries to use it with his family (especially anya and yor).

The series goes out of its way to actually show that Loid faces way less conflicts and him and his family are happier when loid actually shares things that are personal to him and from the heart. Take for example in the beginning of the series where Loid doesn't understand anya. He doesn't understand how to raise anya or properly care for her so he tries to learn by taking a ton of parenting books with him and we see how that fails. We are shown loid accepting that all he can do is help anya and raise her to the best of his abilities even if that may be a challenge. Loid recognises that he may never come to fully understand her or her antics and that parenting is completely different to his spy job. Anya is com different to the people that he meets and understands like a book, she is a child and one with many layers who will ironically be two steps ahead of loid due to her telepathic abilities.

Another example is yor. We can see that in chapter 35 Loid easily reaches for the wrong conclusion that yor has developed romantic feelings for him as to him he saw her express jealousy towards fiona but in reality yor was a lot more insecure about her role as Anya's mother and if she was even doing a good job at it. After a ruckus loid comes to realise that and we see that him being personal and having an intimate moment with yor helps their relationship a lot more then loid guessing what yor is upset about and giving her a desired answer. Ultimately, these moments help Loid break out of his spy role and job of twighlight and let the true character that he has burried within and burnt away shine. This also allows for him to make genuine connections and for him to slowly start to show the real him (fiona did point out that she could see the true characterof Loid shining through when she saw him sitting down with yor and anya)

While we do see loid analyse others with varying degrees of success this also applies to loid himself. Loid doesn't analyse himself because of his promise to burn away his identity and completely forget about the past yet he never truly did forget and has only repressed the memories as a defense mechanism.

Sure loid has told anya that he became a psychiatrist to help the veterans who suffered from the war meaning that he is probably aware of things like shell shock and ptsd yet doesn't apply it himself because

1) he doesn't want to see it or just doesn't acknowledge it

2) he believes that he may not specifically fit the category as psychology and the development of psychology in the early 1950s was still at its premature stages with inhumane practices such as elctroshock therapy going on and more.

For his character of Loid Forger, a psychiatrist, Twilight probably had to read a thousand books on psychiatry in record time and now is surrounded by real psychiatrists all the time, so is he aware that he himself meets many of the symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder and other mental health problems?

like bro , is he aware that it is not normal that he is unable to hear the slightest cry of any child without becoming anxious, that he can't remember his own parents' faces, that he is so into the whole spy thing that even in his own mind he calls himself 'Twilight' and not '[Redacted]', that he gets so nervous every time Yor gets mad at him?

[livstarlight]

*seeing Namor and Shuri stop fighting, despite everything that went down, ending the cycle of violence and vengeance, forging an alliance of their two kingdoms against the dangers of a world full of colonizers*

Me: The power that that has, the intelligence that that has, the clearance that that has, the access that that has, the influence that that has, the profile that that has, the international implications that that has

Also me 0.75 seconds later: So now you are gonna get married, right? RIGHT?

[still-a-morosexual-help]

Previous anon discussing the depth and lore here!

Read your response and I gotta say I still don’t completely agree, but I see where you’re coming from. Just wanna clarify that I do think Obey Me is one of the better otomes imo, but I just don’t feel like all decisions (ie facial expressions, lines) were exactly made with as much thought as you express (don’t get me wrong tho, I’m not saying the devs don’t deserve any credit or praise for decisions or writing). The best way I can explain it is when a teacher is analyzing a blue curtain in a film as “expressing sadness” and then the director saying he just liked the color blue— that’s kinda how I see the fandom’s analysis to the Obey Me plot. I do agree that it’s important to pay attention to details, but personally with *some* things, it feels like an over analysis. But of course that’s just me (and i enjoy reading it anyways lmao)!! TLDR; story is great, but it could be better lol. ANYWAYS sorry for rambling so much, we can agree to disagree on some things </3 still love you

Oh yeah definitely! Sometimes a blue curtain is a blue curtain. God, I'm not saying 0M! 's got some amazing depth or whatever😂😂😂 and I'll definitely be the first person to admit that I overanalyse things ( *cough*mammon's panic attack in the cupboard*cough*im so sorry michael i was just playing around and having fun i didn't mean to make people hate you before you even appeared*cough*) but it's also got more depth than people give it credit for

And while I don't think there's some deep analysis or reason behind the lines & expressions, you also don't just put lines or expressions in yknow?

(l think the only time you can get accidental expressions is in live action - where someone isn't meticulously planning out every line of a person's face. Like obviously in cartoons there'll be a lot of times where the fandom overanlyses an expression but at the same time even if the fandom is digging too deep that expression was a deliberate choice on the creators' parts)

At least in my experience you don't - if a character changes their facial expression between one sentence to another because they're talking to a character they're close with vs one they're not (eg: asmo in the s2 example I gave in the previous post when he spoke to Solomon vs Diavolo) then someone made a deliberate decision to make that expression change

Like if a line or expression is there it's because the devs added it, which means at least some small amount of thought went into its placement. Obviously not every line or expression has a deeper meaning but you can usually tell which ones do by whether or not they stand out compared to what the character will normally say/do or compared to what the character is currently saying and if there's a sudden shift in their expression triggered by a shift in the scene (eg: who they're talking to/ who arrives in or leaves the room etc)

Eg 1 : These 3 screenshots follow each other and are (obviously) about the same topic

Talking to Diavolo

Vs

Talking to Solomon

Eg 2: Usually when Mammon calls Luke a Chihuahua

If he's teasing/deliberately saying it to be an asshole, he's smiling:

If not, his expression usually fits what he's feeling/saying,

when casual:

when angry:

when exasperated:

But this is his expression after Luke interrupts their serious yet secret discussion with Simeon, where up to this point Mammon was angry, worried & upset:

Specially after going through so many "high"/"large" emotions, he instantly becomes uncharacteristically blank/stoic when Luke barges in

Eg 3 :

After MC commands 6 of the brothers in one swoop and feels no adverse effects while Solomon & Diavolo know that their magic is going out of control and destroying things. Solomon asks about how they feel after controlling the brothers for the first time and is his usual smiling self. When MC leaves though his expression drops. And this is significant because

a.) We rarely get to see the characters' expressions after MC leaves

b.) Solomon's always so smiley that any change is very noticeable

c.) There's no dialogue box that appears and usually a character is not kept on screen for that extra second like that since they're either immediately switched with another character or the scene ends and the screen turns black

Eg 4 :

There's also expressions/dialogue that's repeated when a character is feeling the same emotion

a.) Lucifer goes "..." when he's worried (eg: when Mammon runs away from home, when Mammon starts acting upset/distant after being forced to act like an angel - both in devilgrams)

b.) Mammon goes "..." when he's truly upset (eg: when MC's day to leave draws closer, when MC kisses Lucifer - both in the main story)

So yeah, not every line/expression has some deeper meaning but there are lots of moments like this ^ where it can't be anything but a deliberate placement on the devs part and that's what I was talking about in the previous ask

But yeah at the end of the day to each their own and I'm more than happy to agree to disagree I just needed a place to talk about those ^ examples with screenshots because they're some of my favourite moments in OM! writing wise

[onbeinganangel]

artists self rec! when you get this, reply with your favourite five arts/sets/edits/gifs that you've done, then pass on to at least five other people. time to shine and spread some self-love and appreciation 🥰 <3

omg sia, hi!!! it feels so special to get this question from you, the very first person i ever chatted to when i first fell into the drarry rabbit hole 💛💛💛

i’ve not embroidered fic recs in a while (though i have just finished a GORGEOUS commission i can share soon!!) but i think about it a lot. so this is gonna be a bit of little end of the year introspective look at my work. here are my favourite five embroidery projects i’ve done:

fic rec for almost heaven by M0stlyVoid

(original post here) — i just love how this one came out! i love the simplicity of the hands and the wee plait that i made! i fucked up my entire back doing this in 6 hours because i’m a mess but i still think it was totally worth it. this is also responsible for my obsession with embroidering hands (may it live forever) so, again, totally worth it!!

fic rec for Running on Air by eleventy7

(original post here) — this fic will never not be special. these were a lot of work but they remind me of a very special summer and autumn of sitting in the park embroidering and i love that they’re a set of two, with the iconic landscapes. i just love how they are different but complement each other! it makes me think i’d love to make more matching sets actually 👀

3. fic rec for Who we are in the shadows by Quicksilvermaid

(original post here) — i think i love this one specifically because of how experimental it is. i love the gauzy base fabric, the cotton wool, the textured moon. i keep meaning to play with fabric more and haven’t done it as much as i wish, but i really enjoy looking at all the textures in this one

fic rec for Among Ancient Pines by Theartfulldodger

(original post here) — talk about texture!! this was one of those that took AGES and a lot of patience to keep going and going and going with the same bloody stitch. a lot of textile art is trusting the process, and this one put me through it a bit. i love the end result so much though! it's so colourful and bright and i love that i even made the wee trees at the bottom work, which was terrifying after spending so many hours on the base layer haha

fic rec for The Last of What the World Left You by xanthippe74

(original post here) — i mean, look at this wee fella, how could i not love him to death 🥺 i LOVE filling in colour with long and short stitch. satin stitch is satisfying but i just love the depth and dimension long and short stitch give pieces. until this piece though, i'd never dared do it in darker colours! i think it takes a lot more finesse and you can lose a lot of detail with the darker thread. i took a chance because i really, REALLY wanted to embroider HIM specifically for xanthippe's fic, and the effort absolutely paid off. i am no longer scared of darker colours and he makes me smile every time i see him

this got super long to no one's surprise but it was a pleasure to look at these! i think i tend to overanalyse (and worry over) my writing a lot more than i do my embroidery so this was really fun! thank you again <3

[shitminds]

It’s Really Not That Deep: The Overanalysis of Literature in Systematic Education

Or: Why Lord of the Flies is Not About Intrinsic Evil

I’ve recently reread Lord of the Flies after first reading it at school a few years back.

The copy of the book I read has a little introduction about Sir William Golding and his philosophy that inspired Lord of the Flies. It went on and on about Biblical ‘Good’ and ‘Bad’, the regression of human civilisation, intrinsic evil and all the pessimistic bs you covered in ninth grade English Lit. 

But despite its repetitiveness and uselessness, I gained a bit of information from the intro about Golding's biography that I was not aware of: he was a commander in the English Navy during World War Two. 

With that in mind as I read the novel, I started piecing together a little idea: Lord of the Flies is not about how humans are undoubtedly shitty, but rather it’s a reflection of how war and conflict breed unfettered hopelessness. 

I’m not going to go into what I think the themes and allegory in Lord of the Flies deliver- that’s a whole other post -but rereading the novel absent of any encouraged ideology really does completely change the way you think about the literature you read in school: what if I wasn’t told at 14 that humans must be under strict societal rules, otherwise chaos would fester as shown in this Great Classic, but instead learnt the effect and manifestation of war on literature and philosophy? But no, every little bit of lotf told us that without a-to-z civility handbooks we will all dig ourselves into deep anarchy and barbaric tribes

Reading a book written seventy years ago and being told to look for a message that has already been delivered to you pre-read is pointless if what is being taught is interpretation. 

So, if not the free interpretation of literature, what did we learn from reading all those mandatory pages? I think nothing is a close answer. 

Usually, the subtext you were meant to look for is just a reinforced idea of what the literature should mean- that is, there are incorrect and conversely correct interpretations. In addition, this singular interpretation of the literature is overanalysed to the point of meaninglessness. This analysis happens in the name of in-depth reading and recognition of literary devices, metaphors and style, but really it is a surface reading that lacks creativity and encourages all but model-answer-brain-rot.

I don’t think that the Humans Are Bad reading of Lord of the Flies is necessarily incorrect- there shouldn’t be right-and-wrong in literary understating, especially in your ninth-grade reading of X classic- but it shouldn’t be pushed as the only way to read the novel. And this, of course, applies to all other works of literature. As long as you can justify your interpretation of unstated philosophy, themes, metaphor and all else, your interpretation shouldn’t be dismissed. 

TL;DR: Secondary school English sticks to a one-dimensional understanding of timeless literature and then milks the shit out of it until you are literally scraping for whatever symbolic bullshit that will get you an A. It is not how we should introduce people to meaningful stories.

PS. This is me shit posting. I am bored and it is summer. This is obviously not an academic analysis and I am also very bad at writing so yk, I encourage social niceties

PSS. I’ve read this back just now, and I realise I make very little sense, but anyway this exists and it shall stay

[kirisaki-daichi-scenarios]

a discussion of jabberwock with team interaction hcs + deeper nash analysis

for anon who asked "Can we get some headcanons for jabberwock members or like headcanons when they're together? (its okay if it was jason or nash only)" and made me realise it's about time i get these guys' personalities down

note before we start: cause i didn't know their names until i wrote this

zack is the bald one, allen is the one with a headband, nick is the other white guy apart from nash.

team hcs

nick gets bullied for being under 6ft, but not by jason

nah good old jason teases all of them for being short fucks, emphasising that they’re all 5ft tall in comparison to him

he 100% lifts things out of the others' reach and then laughs for ages after when they try get them

unfortunately though, they’re all used to this and now just ignore him. either that or nash stares at him so intensely jason actually repents and hands it back

zack’s another one with a very good glare, but he’s used it too often on jason and it’s since stopped working.

also jason gives me ‘straightens his back as much as possible when getting measured so he’ll measure in as 7ft’ vibes

oh and he thinks he could wrestle a gator and win. i’ve got no explanation for that except for the fact you can't tell me it's ooc.

allen’s very protective over his white headband - it’s his lucky item - but he’d never let anyone know that

he’s confident in his abilities like the rest of them, but there’s nothing wrong with wearing a headband just in case

(nash knows anyway)

they watch nba matches together and do not shut up once throughout the entire match - lots of jeering, booing each other if someone criticises a player they like, lots of “i could do that”, lots of “get your fucking hand out of my popcorn do you want me to punch you in the face” etc

they used to all live together, but nash has since moved out. he was sick and tired of trying to make people do chores, as the only one who kept their room clean.

yeah the others’ house looks like a heap of trash but also very much “where’s my toothbrush?” “it’s in the third coke can by the orange peel behind the sink” *silence* “yeah thanks” *a minute later* “who the fuck has been using my toothbrush”

they’re all “bro your dribbling sucks why are you on this team loser” to one another, but also very protective (aka arrogant for one another) if anyone else Dared to criticise one of their teammates

then again, what kind of person would criticise jabberwock

half of the time he spends with jabberwock, nash is a Single Mother TM trying to get a bunch of man children to behave; the other half of the time, he's just as bad as the rest of them

i talk about this a lot but i get the feeling nash is an exceptionally hard worker, but at least he gets to let his hair down around his teammates sometimes

nash is also the only person jason thought was truly ‘strong’ at first sight

and nash is also the only person who can beat jason in a fight, and also the only person who can get nash to train, and also the only person who can.. [etc. you see my point].

(n.b jason calls himself the ‘almighty me’, nash says that ‘even god can’t beat me’. point made.)

you know how jason silver’s motto is “I have never thought”

imagine him proudly stating that, before zack adds with a straight face, “yeah cause nash does it for you.”

in short, the team would fall apart without nash.

although the team’s communication and coordination is very fine tuned, nash is the guy who keeps everything in order off the court to prevent what is essentially a team of aces ('main characters', if you will) from falling apart

they hang out together a lot, but do all have other friend groups that do not overlap

team bbqs

unofficial rule not to criticise anchovies on pizza because the one time nick did, nash snapped

however pineapple on pizza is fair game, even though zack quite likes it

more than once, jason has brought a girl home and nick has stolen her attention away with effortless trick shots, funky ball manoeuvring etc

more than once nick has had to trek to nash’s place (with a black eye) at midnight to have somewhere to sleep

do you see a correlation?

oh and everyone in the team has been walked in on by nash when they were naked with some girl

nash has absolutely no shame

he apologises to the girl with a charming albeit insincere tone, and then remains standing in front of the bed/couch until his teammate does what he expected of them

usually it involves not having come to practice

allen learnt a few (emphasis on ‘few’) words of japanese before they travelled to japan and was disappointed that he never got to use them

that said, one of those words was hentai

and now a quick analysis of some panels

a) so there's at least one player who wasn't underestimating vorpal swords. if i were to overanalyse, i'd add that nick's wearing a hoodie (possibly athletic wear) whilst nash has a 'fancy' shirt on; perhaps nick wasn't expecting them to be going to host clubs instead of chilling/training?

b) i know what you're thinking: "how can you say nash is a hard worker when he didn't want to practice for the match". i reckon he was still pretty high on the complete and utter success of their previous match, that plus being around girls, encouraged him to have a more 'jason-y' personality. (either that or fujimaki didn't want to add too much depth/realism into nash's character bc he's unequivocally the villain, right? and obviously this helps with the plot and the jabberwock bad geniuses gom good geniuses rhetoric.)

earlier, i mentioned how nash is the only one that could keep the team together, and is thus the undeniable head of the team; here's a clear example. you can see both jason and zack have no interest in continuing - if anything, there's disgust in their faces, kinda just saying "we spat on all of japan, now we can go home". whereas nash won't allow for the slightest of possibilities that there might exist a team stronger than them, and hence agrees to the match. the key thing here is that the others do as he says without too much fuss.

another thing to note is nash's reference to harakiri. now what can we make of that, alongside his proficiency in japanese, in relation to his character? the way i see it, he's either a weeb or possibly has some japanese lineage. (you could spin that even further and say his mother was japanese, taught him the language, then abandoned him, and hence his almost excessive hatred/mockery of the japanese people.) (is that why he wanted to do another match in japan..?)

just a quick point. "thanks to him" - jason isn't so superior as to think that he could win this match effortlessly without nash's support. links pretty nicely with my earlier idea about how nash is the only person jason has always considered 100% strong.

yet another point about how nash is the strongest of the team in pretty much every way you can think of. you know how scary/powerful you have to be to shut jason up (after he's getting real pissed from being prevented from scoring?)

i personally think this is a pretty important panel, though i've never seen anyone mention it before. did nash grow up training in a professional basketball training situation, as opposed to growing up playing streetball like i suspect the others did? well, to answer that question, imma bring in another panel.

here we see visible rage on nick, zack and jason's faces - they can't accept their loss, which is fair enough. but i'd argue that nash's face seems to depict sadness more than it does anger like to rest of them, look at how downturned his mouth is - and he's looking away from the 'camera', as if hiding his shame.

when you combine that with what he says here, i have no doubt that this is someone who has experienced some proper lows in basketball - as would be expected from someone who's played 'properly'. he's possibly not even a prodigy like the rest of them - compare jason's motto with his. "i have never thought" versus "do not suppose opportunity will knock twice at your door".

there's various lines of thinking you could design with this - he might have been trained by alex (hence, himuro having heard of jabberwock, though he should have known of a team as popular of jabberwock regardless), he might have grown up with professional basketballer parents etc. but here's my own little theory:

nash received serious basketball training from early on - maybe because his parents were living vicariously through him, or maybe he always loved the sport and wanted to be no1. so there he was training away, but, as he grew older, it started getting all a bit too much.

he didn't want to dedicate his entire life to basketball. after all, his hobby is water sports and his speciality is boxing; that's a lot of different things to be keeping up with, whereas the pipeline for promising athletes demands people focus solely on basketball. as a result, nash become bitter: stopped attending practice regularly, got in trouble for trash talk of increasing severity, etc.

result was he was kicked out of the program.

only when he was no longer playing basketball again, did he realise how much he missed it. and hence he got into streetball, where he was tremendously successful as someone with so much training, 'elite skills', and the overly confident attitude to boot.

then, one fateful day, he met jason and the rest is history.