buddieism

[buddieism]

suffering with this being a sideblog so at some point in the near future i'm probably going to transition to a main blog bc with hiatus incoming i'm basically going to be living here anyway..... watch this space

[buddieism]

was talking about this on twitter but i think it's so fascinating how the prospect of buck being in love with eddie has been like. alluded to multiple times now by people in his life. maddie saying if there's something you need to tell eddie, you will; tommy saying i'm not your last; it's the elephant in the room that nobody wants to confront. least of all buck. because obviously buck loves eddie but he's never considered the idea that he might be *in love* with eddie—because eddie is straight, eddie is his best friend, eddie isn't an option. except eddie is literally everything buck is looking for in a partner and buck just needs to figure that out. he needs to realise eddie can be an option!!!

[buddieism]

people who say that eddie doesn’t need to dance around to heal he needs to go to therapy or whatever are so boring!!! i don’t wanna watch a man sit on a couch and talk i want to watch him get flirted with by a gay priest and then go home and dry hump the air and then have life affirming sex with his best friend who gafs

[buddieism]

eyes spying for your light

buddie, 6.8k, rating: e

Eddie makes a choked sound that breaks his heart. He wants to reach for him, he wants to drive to Texas and drag Chris back home himself, he wants to kick himself for missing this, for letting Eddie fester here in his guilt and falling for his half-truths, he wants –

He wants a lot of things. And one day that immeasurable want is going to devour him.

[buddieism]

something crucial to keep in mind about buck is that he's a) a weird girl b) a dog with seperation anxiety c) prone to spiraling, and d) has never made a rational decision in his life. the second this man looks around and sees the quicksand and realizes he's somehow already neck-deep in scary love with his best friend, he is going to Freak The Fuck Out and then he is going to make a series of decisions that you could never even dream of

[buddieism]

need to actually tap into the buddie blogger scene because frankly i was really incapable of enduring tommy positivity over the summer but now we're free of that i need to be more active on here... i'm a tumblrina at heart 🌷

[buddieism]

thinking about buck being upset over the abruptness of the breakup but eddie isn't particularly sympathetic about it (hence the "unexpected reaction" mentioned in another interview). like when buck brings it up eddie makes an offhand comment about how it's not like the two of you were going to get married. which obviously offends buck but also makes him remember tommy insisting he was never going to be buck's last—and why was tommy so confident about that, anyway? so buck's upset with eddie ("there are going to be some difficulties coming up for them as well") meanwhile eddie has to interrogate why he never considered buck & tommy a serious relationship or perceived tommy as a 'threat' -> because eddie was already the one taking up that partner role in buck's life as evidenced to us in 8x05. naturally this will culminate in a forced conversation about #their relationship because they will be trapped in a near-death experience saw trap and a bomb is going to go off in 15 minutes et cetera et cetera

cornplating over this interview crumb like a crazy person rn.

[buddieism]

cornplating over this interview crumb like a crazy person rn.

[buddieism]

eddie diaz looking arguably the gayest he’s ever looked in a cut off muscle tank and mustache. sitting at a sunny los angeles coffee shop being openly flirted with by a priest who hits on him in such a life changing way that within 36 hours he is dancing around in his underwear and collapsing half naked onto his couch with a newly-single buck buckley. if you can dream it you can truly achieve it. life is literally so so beautiful

[buddieism]

"i put my desires before his needs" is literally one of the most incredibly obvious lines that sets up eddie's gay arc like. eddie having all this guilt and repression that he doesn't fully understand himself but his attention has always been directed towards christopher so he can't even begin to unpack why him pursuing his desires would be such a terrible thing. eddie feeling like it's wrong for him to go after what he wants. eddie underscoring how he lied (to his son best friend and girlfriend in that order) and how that affects how he sees himself as a father. eddie just wanting nothing more than to protect his son........even from himself. especially from himself. because if he's a good father he won't let himself look at that little locked box in the corner of his brain that says DO NOT OPEN. oh my god eddie we are getting you out of there

[buddieism]

i find it so interesting that the kim situation was truly framed like he was cheating on buck and not marisol. buck being the one he directly lied to about the date, buck being the one to confront him in the middle of the night about the other woman, and now it’s buck eddie’s worried about lying to? buck he feels guilty about? yeah mentioned marisol, but the order of importance of people who were affected were chris, buck, and then her. he cheats on his girlfriend and worries about lying to his best friend? eddie diaz you are not right in the head you are GAY

[buddieism]

lapse in faith buddie, 9-1-1, explicit. ao3. catholic guilt, under-negotiated kink, casual sex, getting together

In the comedown, Eddie lets himself drift. He waits for it—the shame, the guilt, the panic over thinking about his best friend while he got himself off. It comes, but not for the reasons he expects. Eddie melts into his mattress in the aftermath of his orgasm, and doesn’t stop thinking about it. He’s gay. He finds Buck hot. Buck is his best friend, his co-parent, his partner in just about everything. Buck likes men too. It’s a possibility, a real one. Eddie can see a future with Buck, and that’s when the panic hits him. Eddie wasn’t a good husband. What he has with Buck right now isn’t worth losing. Eddie is in love with his best friend, but he thought that about Shannon too—and look where that ended up.

or: Eddie fucks an ex-priest, has a crisis of faith, and figures it out.

[buddieism]

we all know ryan guzman would absolutely body a pining eddie arc....he has big brown eyes....literally MADE for pining...

[buddieism]

i just think the physicality shown in 8x05 between buck, tommy & eddie was so interesting.

tommy hovers outside buck’s hospital room while eddie is already sitting inside talking to the doctor—tommy comes in but eddie stays. buck is the patient, tommy is the visitor (name tag and all), but eddie is simply there; a permanent fixture.

in buck’s loft, tommy sits at the table across from buck and eddie. tommy recoiled from buck when he first saw the boils, and even though eddie is grossed out by them too, he’s the one getting up in buck’s personal space to check them out.

at the hospital waiting for news on denny, tommy is sat right next to buck but is simultaneously excluded from buck’s personal bubble through the 118 group chat notification—which was specifically called out in the dialogue. eddie stares buck down while sucking on a ring pop which of course could mean nothing.

finally, at the cemetery, tommy is standing entirely separate to buck; not by his side the way cough buddie cough were in s6. the ending shot was the *perfect opportunity* to establish bucktommy as a serious relationship. buck could’ve taken tommy’s hand with the two of them walking into the distance together—instead, buck strides away without looking back while tommy jogs after him.

and that’s not even bringing up how there was quite literally zero explicitly romantic affection between buck and tommy the entire episode, even pre-boils (because hey after that fair enough). without those romantic cues, it becomes so much easier to draw comparisons between buddie and bucktommy (both physically and emotionally) and see how eddie is consistently occupying the role in buck’s life that tommy can’t even begin to try and take on.

[buddieism]

michiko dead by jack gilbert x eddie diaz 3x15 / 3x3 / 5x6 / 7x10 / 8x1

[buddieism]

kerosene

buddie | 6.5k words | explicit emotional infidelity, buck/tommy, break ups, first times, AU post 7x06

He doesn’t— need more of Eddie. This is enough. This is plenty. This is more than anyone else has of him; he can deal with the marrow-deep want that’s begun to choke him every once in a while. So what if sitting next to Eddie makes his skin feel like it’s on fire. At least he’s sitting next to Eddie.

Buck pretends.

[buddieism]

why is eddie so whipped for that man that he let him douse him in perfume and get swarmed by 100,000 killer bees. with nary a protest