#Father-son shenanigans AU

[shu-box-puns]

Imagine Spider in the multiverse AU, where Tsu'tey 'dies' in the first movie.

Tsu'tey is fighting to take in his last breaths, fading in and out of consciousness. He can see Sylwanin waiting for him, and he's getting ready to reunite with Eywa. Taking in the last sights of Pandora one last time, his ears prick from the rustling in a nearby bush. HUH?? This LITTLE scrunkly, gangly, monkey-looking, tawtute boy comes busting through the woods and starts smacking the crap out of you, telling him to 'get the fuck up' and 'don't die on me dad'. 🐒

Tsu’tey: 😦...CANT YOU TELL IM HAVING A ΜΟΜΕΝΤ! BOY, LET ME REST IN PEACE🙄🤨

Spider:

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZM699CAsu/

(🥹 Spider and Tsu'tey saving each other in every AU possible)

Just Tsu'tey trying to die in peace before Jake with his big mouth finds him and ruins his last moments, only for some rat child to come SHOOTING out of the undergrowth, looking genuinely distressed and calling him Dad. He is both flattered and baffled. The first because it means he's a good enough role model to be seen as a father figure. And the second because he's barely four years older than this kid. He's too young to be a Dad. ALSO WHY IS THIS CHILD'S WAR PAINT IN THE DESIGN OF TSU'TEY'S FAMILY CREST??

And yes, I could see Spider panicking like that penguin in the video. He would throw a tree at Tsu'tey's bullet wounds if it would heal him.

[itsvalpenguin1]

tsutey haciendo de papa luchon con spider que es un torbellino con patas

[a-substantial-trash-pile]

cringe father son moments on the tulpar 🫶

before you think "will there actually be a next time :(" yes there absolutely will be because this is in my au where jimmy gets fired early on before he does irreversible damage which means i can have all the wholesome found family shenanigans i want on this gatdang ship without threat of The Horrors. yes this is how i cope.

[that-weird-thing-in-the-woods]

Oh well damn to be honest I really wasn’t expecting that 🌌🧿Ancient of space🧿🌌 was going to win but you menaces always find away to surprise me but anyway let’s get started on what you voted for

🌌🧿Ancient Of Space + Dani and Dan 🧿🌌

Now for the ✨PLOT✨ so Danny got got by the GIW after being turned over by his parents because…it’s them anyway after a few weeks of being with the GIW Vlad gets him out with the help of Dani and Dan but as they were leaving via the portal some of the GIW catch them they off Vlad (the rest of the way) and destabilized Dani and Dan ( who for this story will be called Dusk for Dani and Dawn for Dan because I feel like it ) and Danny has to take their cores and incubate them until they are able to stabilize enough and it takes around 9 months for that to happen { how convenient}

anyway and Danny heads to the ghost zone but since he has been with the GIW for weeks it would be obvious that Danny injured and he’s been running on adrenaline for the past few weeks and stress so he kinda crash lands in the castle ( with redeemed Pariah Dark let’s go!!) And he nurses him back to health { like with my 🪷Queen Danny🪷 Au} they build a father / son relationship with each other ( more like overprotective father / Hurt and some what traumatized pregnant son) and after some shenanigans and some late night crying from Danny he ends up as 🌌🧿The Ancient Of Space🧿🌌 and now we have for this family dynamic

A redeemed warlord turned King

A pregnant teen traumatized Ancient of space

And a weird uncle/father who has romantic tension with the warlord

And this is Danny’s ‘life’ for a few months ( well he’s a lest 6 months and showing because this is  important for the story line later in) {and you get the pun :)}

And now for the DC part of this Tim drake gets sacrificed by some cultists who wanted to get the “Mother Of Sun rise and Moon rising and Child of War and Time” and wakes up and sees… the stars?? Well not the stars from earth it looks like it comes from deep space where no living thing has ever been and ever well be and as he sits up and looks around it looks like he’s in some dark castle/temple that looks well taken care of and as he gets up and walks around he walks past a pool of water that is so clear that it looks like a bit of the night sky full of stars that it’s reflecting ( it’s not water it’s a bit of the night sky ) and that’s when he sees her…him..? Them, they look gorgeous and that’s all I can think of right now I’ll add more if I feel like it

Now for the details

I’m thinking for dannys outfit

And for his hair I’m thinking

And for the castle/temple

And that’s about it hope this is what you guys wanted byeeee

[hello-eden]

 sub au for my Danny has Talia au

 Damian finds out he has siblings as in Elle and Dan because of time travel shenanigans. It's an accidental future time travel Damien has taken over as phantom, Ellie with the hero name Wrath and Dan as banshee.

The bat family is meeting the future bat family and Damian off-handedly mentioned Ellie and Dan. The family expects these two to be future adoptees when he drops the fact that they're on a mission with his mom. They start asking if Talia is now an ally and Damian says technically but they're on a mother-child bonding trip that they've Disguised as a mission. It's after this that Damian drops another bomb on the fact that both of them are his full-blooded biological siblings.

The bat family starts asking where the hell they are in their timeline. Older Damien looks his father dead in the eyes and shrugs. He has Danny's chaos.

I think it would be really funny for them just to find out how the three of his kids are doing in whatever timeline this is happening.

Damien is a hero named Phantom that the family later learns is taken from Talia's hero name that they didn't know she had and he uses Lazarus Magic( it's ghost Zone/ infinite realms Magic).

The daughter Bruce didn't know he had is a antihero named Wrath who he later finds out accidentally became a chaos God.( all of Talia and Bruce children have the potential to become gods but he does not know that)

A son using the code name banshee that Bruce was not expecting that nonchalantly talks about The Times They were evil And the fact they've probably ended the world multiple times.

[lady-ace]

Mitosis

(set in an AU where Mary and Freddy are both small in their champion form, and Billy doesn't work for Whiz yet.)

Almost everyone knew the marvels. The magical sunny trio, who always seemed joined at the hip. Where one went, the other two were never too far behind.

Of course, with Captain Marvel being the oldest and looking very similar to the other two (Black hair, blue eyes, you get the idea) everyone thought the same thing; “Cap is the father of Mary Marvel and Captain Marvel Jr. Come on, it's even in the name!”

No one, from the public or the superhero community ever brought it up with them, because 'Well, it's obvious!'

..And then the Captain told them they were completely wrong.

/ / /

Superman, while in a casual conversation with the other leaguers, refers to Marvel Jr. As Captain Marvel's son.

Cap, who happened to overhear: “Son? Jr is my older brother.”

[Shocked pause]

GA, gobsmacked: “Why is he called Jr then?”

Cap, a little taken aback by the apparent shock this was to the others: “Well, to be honest, when Jr was coming up with a name, i suggested Jr, because he was smaller than me, and the name stuck.”

GA, still blue screening the fact that Jr was not Cap's son: “Wow.”

GL, waving his hands frantically to accentuate his point: “Are we just gonna pass over the fact Cap just said Jr was older than him?”

Plastic man, jokingly: “Next he's gonna tell us Mary Marvel isn't his daughter either.”

[Cap shoots Plas a look, and before he can speak up, Plastic man continues, his joking tone nowhere to be seen, now in it's place, an almost disbelieving one.]

Plastic man, incredulous: “Oh my God, you are.”

Cap, nodding in agreement: “She's my twin.

[Que various noises of surprise all around the table.]

/ / /

After a few days of Marvel trying to clear up the misunderstanding, it was quite clear a lot of the leaguers simply didn't believe him. Either chalking it up to magic shenanigans or just really doubting he could be younger than Freddy, even though it was so apparent he 'wasn't.'

So, they decided to pull a prank.

With the help of a spell, he aged his Champion form down to the age of his siblings, and dressed up as Mary.

They couldn't wait to see their faces when they saw not one, but two 'Mary Marvels' flying around the watchtower.

After all, they were twins. And what better way to prove it than the classic twin switch-up?

/ / /

Flash, rubbing his eyes before looking again: “I'm not seeing things, am i? Please tell me i've not gone crazy.”

WW, shaking her head: “No. You are seeing things correctly. There's two of our friend present.”

Flash, now a bit worried: “Has Mary been cloned, or is being followed by a doppelganger?”

WW, tilting her head a bit, trying to remember something: “Not that i recall. Maybe you could ask her about it? She doesn't seem concerned about the 'clone'.”

Flash, slapping his forehead in a 'why didn't i do that earlier?' way: “Good idea.”

[Flash goes over to the two Marys (Maries?). When he arrives, one of them beams.]

Billy: “Hi, Flash! How are you doing?”

Flash: “Good! Well, i've been meaning to ask you.. uh, something.”

Mary, grinning: “Well, go ahead.”

Flash, a bit too bluntly: “Why are there two of you?”

Billy, with the most cheerful voice ever: “Mitosis!”

Flash: “Mitosis?!”

Mary, saying this as if it was the most obvious thing: “Why do you think there's only one big Marvel, and the rest of us are small? We separated from the captain recently.”

Billy, holding in a laugh: “But keep it secret, okay? Me and the others trust you to never tell anyone our secret.”

Flash, who is like 'WTF did i just hear': “Uhh.. sure. I won't tell anyone.”

[The two proceed to tell everyone the supposed 'Secret.' Only years later the League would find out it was a prank, when Billy and Mary showed them their civillian forms. They still use the 'Mitosis' as a inside joke when a new member joins the League.]

[drtwit]

Random Fic Idea

Since I've been seeing more people reading this post, just a heads up: the fic has been made.

______________________________________________________________

You know, we have a lot of 'Villain Chat Noir' AU fics, but is there any that have it be positive?

Like, Adrien getting to work along side his father actually leads to more father/son bonding because their villain identities are both goofy drama queens who finally found something they have in common. As well as both having outlets for the frustration of what they have to pretend to be in their real lives.

In the day time, Gabriel is sitting in his office, lecturing Adrien about upholding the Agreste name and dolling out his strict schedule. By night, Hawkmoth and Chat Noir are hold up in the lair, brainstorming puns and quips while Chat gently tells him to stop akumatizing Mr. Pigeon.

Their version of a fishing trip is stealing from the Dupain Bakery. "We're rich, can't we just pay?" "No, because we're evil." *Chat proceeds to leave money on the counter anyway.*

Gabriel coldly reprimands Adrien for getting anything less than an A, while Hawkmoth akumatizes the teacher who dared give his son a B+.

Ladybug is like 'Oh my god, there's two of them.' as Chat and Hawkmoth synchronise their team rocker-ass intro speeches and Mayura's just shaking her head because she has to live with these two goobers.

Gabriel's making a snobbish speech about those damn hooligans wasting their time with silly shenanigans, all while Adrien's resisting the urge to laugh 'cus Hawkmoth akumatized a baby yesterday and spent half of the fight trying to get the baby to pronounce his name right.

Master Fu wonders what horrors the villains are putting his innocent kwamis through, and it just cuts to Nooroo and Plagg dropping the beat.

Chat: *Starts helping old ladies across the street.* Hawkmoth: I knew that Marinette Dupain Cheng was a bad influence on you!

Adrien in the middle of class having a heart attack as an akuma flies straight into the window trying to get his attention. Adrien: Father, now is not the time! Hawkmoth: I just- I just- I just want to check if Chloe's pissed anyone else off yet. Adrien: Didn't Nathalie say no akumatizing until you finish your paperwork? Hawkmoth: She's not the boss of- Nathalie: Gabriel, I can hear you monologuing from the dining room. You better not be interrupting Adrien's education! Hawkmoth: Gotta go!

Adrien: Father, can you not akumatize one of my friends for five minutes?

Hawkmoth: Young man, what do you think you're doing? Plagg: Don't panic, Kid. Show him who's boss. We don't take grief from anybody. Adrien: I'm r-rebelling, Father. You don't own me! Hawkmoth: I do, however, own all of Plagg's cheese. Plagg: ...Okay, Kid, let's think about this-

[casually-eat-my-soul]

So like mafia/King/wolf king/warlord Derek idea?? Maybe A/B/O au

After Derek becomes heir to the empire (mafia or otherwise) is told by his council over and over again that he must marry and have an heir. He doesn’t trust his council much less the women they bring before him to marry. He would simply prefer to kill them all but unfortunately that would be directly traced to him.

So he abides by their demands and looks for a consort. So he throws a party, the most lavish party. The night is long and dreadfully boring. Derek thinks that at the worst he may ask Braeden to marry him. They are a little to hot headed and never seem to agree on a subject but at least the sex will be good. He spends most of the night trying not to dance with women who smell far to desperate.

He is ducking behind a column to hide from Jennifer when he hears the most clever and spiteful voice tell off one of his council members. He follows the voice to a vision of nymph dressing down his least favourite council member (maybe Deaton??) . Derek is absolutely taken a back by how the siren uses his words to get his way. Dereks preferred method is violence, and he tells this to the boy as he walks over — “it seems that my council member has overstepped, I usually find violence is my preferred way of dealing with such slights. Would you like he to rip his heart out for you?” — Derek kisses his hand and he basically declares to everyone listen he wishes to preform a courting action.

To Derek’s delight, the god in human form blushes. He thanks Derek for the offer but says he dealt with it his way. — “it is quite the generous offer Alpha, but I must decline as I have found words may be just as effective a weapon I promise you.” — Derek, desperate to not let him slip away asked him for a dance. He hesitantly agrees, but after the one dance they do not stop until the end of the night. 

The council member that had tried to hurt Derek’s future consort was found dead the next morning, of poison. It’s in the moment Derek declares that he will marry the boy from the night before. (Delusional Derek who is fully convinced they are to be married, and is just a tiny bit obsessed)

So he sets out to win his heart, cue shenanigans from him and the entire hale pack. Especially after finding out that Derek’s consorts father is a lawful man. A lawful man who would rather see his son with Parrish or Daehler rather than Derek. But stiles however refuses any means of courting expect for Derek’s. Because he knows the wolf is the only one for him. (If you like this idea please check out @hedwig221b Torn apart and set Anew)

Stiles didn’t care, Derek understood him in most ways that other didn’t. When his father would tell him that Derek was dangerous stiles wanted to shout back that so was he. His father ignored the worst parts of stiles, Scott didn’t even sees them but Derek understood. He didn’t just see stiles as a helpless omega. Derek is super fucking prideful about this and every time he sees Parrish or Daehler he just smirks at them.

Derek throws another party, this one to publicly state his intention to marry stiles. His council members kick up a big fuss about it until Derek reminds them that they are the ones who wanted Derek to have a consort. He abided by the rules. They claimed Derek couldn’t mate a beta but Derek ignored him. (Stiles doesn’t advertise the fact that he’s an omega)

Derek buys stiles a dress and jewels to wear.

Stiles only dances with Derek that night, anytime someone else asks him he refuses. (Parrish). During one of their dances when the music is fast paced and stiles heart is beating out of his chest, stiles spark comes into play and creates ribbons of energy that dance alongside them. So it looks like they are dancing in fire. (This is what kickstarted this idea)

So they marry and stiles helps Derek secure his claim.

Derek over hears his council talking bad about his husband so he kills them and then fucks his stiles pregnant to prove them wrong.

He also drags Daehler before his beloved omega for overstepping, and this time when Derek offers to rip out his heart for stiles, he agrees.

[bitchimasnake-sss]

bitchimasnake-sss presents: the one piece AUs [cause i want these men in every universe]

01. i serve! (my ex's head on a platter) ft. roronoa zoro!

brought to you by my current hyperfixation with challengers and zendaya. set-up: you've worked your ass off; early mornings, late nights, diets, workouts, everything. only to still to fall in the shadow of the current badminton world champion and your ex: roronoa zoro. bitter, agitated and absolutely exhausted, you had decided to never see him or even think of him again. but when an email from his coach dracule mihawk finds you, proposing you and zoro team up for the upcoming mixed doubles champion's cup, can you refuse? here's part 02 cw: smut, angst and dumb shenanigans! warnings: dumb people even dumber plot by me <3 zoro is a pain in the ass. nsfw includes: oral (f!receiving), penetration, doin' the do raw, more angst and more shenanigans. did i mention zoro is a pain? yeah that. mdni, shoo now. wc: 9.4k [IM SORRY I PUT TOO MUCH EFFORT INTO IT] m.list

13th of june, 10:02 a.m

"i didn't think you would come."

"me neither."

you felt dracule mihawk's gaze study you as if you were an opponent on the court, eyeing every little movement from the involuntary twitch of your fingers to the shallow breaths you heaved out. an unease crept against your throat and made a residence in there as you stood at the entrance to the kuraigana mansion, waiting for the retired world champion to say anything.

by anything, you didn't exactly expect pleasantries.

"how have you been?" mihawk's face eased, a shallow smile carving itself against his usual vampire-ish appearance.

"just fine." you replied back coolly, "and you, sir?"

"ah, you know, the usual. tournaments, training zoro." his words stilled at the mention of his moss-haired son-turned-student and he eyed you motionless face.

if mihawk wanted you to give away anything about how you felt about zoro, he was setting himself up for failure. although the mere mention of the man's name made your skin crawl and fill you with bugs, you simply smiled, "i heard he won the last men's singles in france, congratulations."

"the praise is reserved for the player, not me." mihawk stepped aside, slowly beckoning you in, "well, come on in, then."

you stepped after him into the castle-like mansion. kuraigana residence. the interiors were classic black and white with random, almost-haphazard pops of pink and purple sprinkled in, probably perona's influence on her otherwise classy father's tastes.

"looking for someone?" the man enquired, not turning around to look at you as he guided you through the main entrance.

"no." you replied quickly before putting on a faux smile, "just admiring the interiors. you have a wonderful home, sir."

"thank you. credit goes to that enigmatic child of mine, perona." the man replied modestly, now taking you through the main living room. the room was huge. littered with two black couches, a large flatscreen, coffee-table, a table tennis table that didn't match the aesthetic whatsoever, with art plastered on each otherwise barren, white wall.

"are you home alone?" mindlessly, you looked around again, perhaps hoping to catch a glimpse of a certain dreadful man.

"zoro is out with a couple of friends—"

"—i meant perona."

"well," mihawk sighed, now leading you into the gigantic kitchen, "you know her. she hates to stay home for more than two days. she's in milan right now, working with a label." he pointed to the seat near the marble kitchen island, "have you been in touch with perona?"

"no," you admitted casually as you sat atop one of the many seats, as he stood opposite to you on the other side of he island, "i mean, we follow each other on instagram, that's about it. we were never really close."

"i see." mihawk grabbed two wine-glasses, perching them on the table before pulling out a unopened wine bottle from the top cupboard, "wine?"

"i'm off alcohol for the season." you answered politely, and left out the fact that it was ten in the morning.

the man hummed a faint yes before pouring himself a glass full of familiar, maroon-hued liquid. he sipped in a drink, eyeing yourself before keeping the glass back on the marble, "well that's enough chit-chat, let's cut to the chase."

you perked up, elbows propped on the island as he continued, "i presume you got my mail."

"of course."

"then you know that i want you and zoro to team up for the upcoming doubles championship."

"i do." your fingers clasped together, chin resting atop them. you took a steadying breath, "and my answer is no."

mihawk crocked up an eyebrow as you continued, "it was always gonna be a no, sir. you are- were like a father to me, and that's the only reason i dignified your request with an actual visit. it does not change the fact that i will not team up with roronoa zoro."

"calling him by his legal name?" mihawk mused, "i thought he was 'zo to you. he only let you call him that, anyways."

that was in the past, though, wasn't it? years before he was number one in the men's category and you were at two in the women's category. years before he started pretending as if he had never known you. years before you showed up at his house only to turn down the offer to play alongside him.

"we are nothing more than strangers, i'm afraid."

the man hummed as he gulped down the rest of his drink alongside your words. as he poured himself another glass, he continued, "i have to be honest. my request is a bit more selfish than what i'm letting on."

he paused as you straightened up, "i'm retiring from the position of his coach after the doubles champions' tournament." you stared at the older man as he continued, "this is his last tournament with me as his coach."

"does zo- roronoa know?"

"not yet. he needs to focus on the game." mihawk shrugged, tipping his glass towards you, "and you and him both know i am at the age where i should move away to italy and open my own wine cellar, rather than running around on the court."

a laugh escaped you at the absurdity of mihawk's request, "what are you suggesting, sir? roronoa doesn't need me to win, he is capable enough to with with anybody."

he's the bloody number one, isn't he?

"you won the champions cup last year with that kid law, did you not? i would rather take the chances with you than somebody else."

you stilled, thinking of a flattering response before spewing out, "i only won because roronoa did not play last year, sir. the competition was slim, and me and law made a good team."

mihawk set his glass down, "don't try to sell yourself short. you are not inferior to zoro, we both know that."

maybe. but you would not team up with that bastard. not ever.

you dragged your seat backwards, standing up, "i am afraid it is still a no, sir. and if you do not want me as an opponent, i would happily withdraw from this year's tournament." you bowed, "thank you for having me over."

mihawk called out your name as you turned your back on him, "i would never beg, you know that. but zoro needs you to win." you looked over your shoulder at the older man, "and i need him to win this time, no matter what. do it for this old man, for old time's sake."

for old time's sake, is it?

you looked away from the man, letting his words turn sour against your skin. a sigh escaped you, "fine. we can discuss the details through my manager. but—" you turned around, casting a sharp glance at the coach, "—i am doing this only for your sake, mihawk. nothing more, nothing less."

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

16th of june, 7:52 a.m.

three days later, you were clad in your practice set, and the duffel bag with your equipment felt heavier than usual in your right hand as you run the doorbell to the kuraigana residence.

the winds were unkind, the clouds were greying and ashy, a clear reflection of your spirit as a certain moss-head opened the door. your gaze tangled against his, and for a second you felt as if somebody punched you in the gut and left you paralysed, and a seventeen year old with a broken heart again.

he was so much prettier than he seemed on camera. tousled moss hair, a scar on his eye from when you were kids and a crooked smile that he gave the cameras when he won. fucking bastard. you couldn't wait to break a badminton racket on his stupid head. put him in a fucking coma.

so what if you both didn't win? you would kill him. yes, that will satiate your hunger. prison be damned.

a wayward shock running down your spine as you moved past him and inside the mansion. wordless.

"wh-what are you doing here?" his throat seemed to have gone dry as he hurriedly walked after you, carefully avoiding saying your name lest you were a demon he could summon.

"what?" you asked as you made your way to the living room, never once turning around lest you see his face and start punching him, "what do you mean why am i here? don't you know?"

"no?" irritation snipped at the raw edges of his words, "why are you here?"

your eyes widened in part amusement, part astonishment. is he dumb? is he actually clueless? that's roronoa zoro for you, i suppose.

"she's your partner." mihawk replied coolly from where he sat on the sofa, "for the mixed doubles campion's cup."

"HER?!" his voice cracked, eyes widening as he peered down at his own father, "DAD?!"

the annoyance in his voice set you aflame and you stared down at mihawk aswell, "you didn't tell him, sir?"

"well, i did." mihawk answered nonchalantly, sipping down wine slowly, "didn't i tell you, zoro? that your partner would be coming today to practice?"

"you didn't tell me it was her." he grumbled, and your blood pressure rose as you stared down mihawk, "sir, i would not team up with such a fucking idiot."

"zoro, do not behave like a hooligan—"

zoro whipped his neck to look at you, his jaw locked and eyes narrowed, "who are you calling a fucking idiot?"

you craned your neck to stare him down in return, "you."

zoro stepped forward towards his father and pointed accusatorily towards you, his earrings chiming ever-so-softly, "i am not teaming up with her."

"me neither." you grumbled, stepping forward to match his stance, "i take back what i said, i cannot partner up with him! he's insufferable."

but mihawk stared down the both of you and for a moment, you both were two sixteen year olds who just got caught making out in his room instead of adults in your twenties about to go for a international champion's cup.

"are you both gonna behave as adults or do i need to give you a stern lecture?" mihawk asked coolly.

"'m sorry, dad." zoro mumbled and you joined him as you both stared down at the floor, "i'm sorry too, sir."

the coach stood up, "apologize to each other. now."

zoro gave you a side-eye, "sorry."

"hm. sorry."

"much better. no animosity should linger between partners." mihawk put down the glass, "onto practicing we go, now. zoro lead her to the indoor court, i would be there soon."

indoor court? what the fuck.

zoro refused to dignify you with anything as you both walked through a maze of hallways that finally opened into a proper, full-sized indoor court.

"shit." you mumbled as you took in the open roof of the court. the grey overhead clouds casted a gloomy look on the court. zoro grumbled something under his breath before switching on a button which closed the metallic roof with a soft creak.

what the fuck.

well, soon enough, you realized two very important things: first, this mansion was insane. and second, roronoa zoro was number one for a reason.

you were heaving, chest rising and falling so rapidly that it felt as if your lungs and heart would burst inwards and paint you red. your calf muscles pulsed mercilessly as sweat dripped down your eyebrow and onto the flat plane of your cheeks. blinded by exhaustion, you tried to match the movements of the man opposite to you.

he was tired but he was graceful.

roronoa zoro was heaving, sweat trailing down his hair and neck and disappearing down his black shirt. but his gaze was focused, his steps ever-so-calculated as he ran from one end of the court to the other, and as he shot down the shuttle, the muscles in his bicep rippled and came alive with a strange delight.

"zoro, don't run so much. you have nothing to prove, you look like an idiot and you would exhaust yourself." mihawk noted, his voice booming between the sounds of the air being sliced by your shots and the soft sounds of pants and groans.

mihawk called out your name next, "do not restrain your arms. think of the racket as an extension of yourself, and allow your hands to move freely. hit harder. taking it easy gets us nowhere."

"i am trying." you grit through your teeth, trying to expend force as you hit back the shuttle with all your might.

zoro moved backwards, his arms being pulled back before he hit the shuttle back to your left. you attempted to run, to catch the shuttle before it fell to the court, but your right calf cramped up and your feet wobbled as you lost your footing and fell down.

"that's enough." mihawk concluded, "this is enough practice for today."

you allowed yourself to lay down on the court, holding your pulsating calf to your chest and panting through your mouth as the oxygen slowly flooded your muscles and eased your body up.

"are you okay?" mihawk asked you as he stood above you, peering you down with his hawk-like eyes. you nodded yes with a red face and tembling lips, assuring him you were fine.

as you stared up at the ceiling, you heard zoro pick up his duffel and walk out of the court without even as much of a "good game" or a "are you okay?" and it was crystal clear how far ahead roronoa zoro was, because you were on the ground trying to catch your breath while he was whistling and walking back to his room without as much of a water break.

fuck. lot of work to be done before you could kill that asshole.

"perhaps, you should stay here." mihawk suggested as you finally pulled yourself up and he offered you a bottle of water.

you spluttered on the liquid and some of it dribbled down your lips uncharacteristically, "wh-hat? here?"

"you would have to come in every morning," he answered back, "there is no point in travelling everyday now, is there? we have many spare bedrooms."

"i-" you wiped the sweat from your forehead with the back of your hand, looking up at the coach with furrowed brows, "i don't know, sir."

"we have spare rooms in the west wing, and zoro's room is in the east wing." mihawk crossed his arm, "the rest is your decision, of course."

you sighed, "is it really my decision?"

"no. a room has been set for your already." mihawk shrugged, "i thought you would agree for this old man's sake."

"jesus fucking christ, you're good at emotional blackmailing."

8:31 p.m.

"i don't understand why she's here." zoro grumbled as he munched on his dinner.

"because it is pointless for her to come and go every day," mihawk dabbed his lips with a white cloth, "and do not talk when you're eating."

"so i need to see her face everyday?"

"can you stop talking about me as if i'm not here?" you glared at man sitting opposite to you, "i don't want to see you face everyday either."

zoro smiled so politely that it made you want to rip his hair out of his scalp with a kitchen knife. prison be fucking damned.

"then, leave."

"i swear on any god—"

"—what? what do you swear? if you're asking favours from god, maybe ask for getting better at badminton." the man scoffed, thoroughly happy with his own little jab.

"mihawk," you glared daggers at zoro, "if i kill roronoa, would you turn me in to the police?"

"of course he will." zoro squinted.

you squinted back at the athelete, "no, he can just adopt me and forget about you instead. he likes me better, anyways."

"oh, does he?" zoro quipped up rhetorically and mihawk shrugged, dabbing his lips before admitting a casual "she is quite lovely."

"dad!—"

a cashmere grin, eyes never leaving the athlete. "thank you, sir."

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

3rd of august, 11:07 a.m.

the next few weeks were a strange repetition, days filled only with three characteristic things: first, you woke up at five in the morning, practiced with a very-angry zoro (because god knows how much he resents those five am alarms) till you were about to pass out. second, ate food that their divinely gifted chef made. and third, bickered with zoro like a child.

"who the fuck puts a table-tennis table in the living room? money clearly cannot buy some sense of design." you glared at him as he glared right back at you. mihawk was out, the house was eerily quiet and you two had just finished up with the first practice session of the day, the adrenaline still pumping high through your mortal bodies.

"how do you know i put it in here?"

"'cause perona actually understands decor? you are the directionless idiot."

"okay. not that i have to explain to you but— first of all, it's practical for when my friends come over." he paused, thinking, "oh, do you know what friends are? they are people that voluntarily hang out with you and like—"

"oh, so funny." you mockingly laughed before crossing your arms in front of your chest. the sportsman momentarily stared down at your chest. jesus christ. he was reeled back into reality, quickly looking away and pretending to hit a mosquito. there are no mosquitoes here. a blushed crept up his face, to the tips of his ears, "yeah, i know. i'm funny."

"doesn't excuse your poor fucking decor skills."

"well, for starters, i can do what i want because it's my house—"

"—your dad's."

"and you are living in my house."

"because your dad asked me to because he likes me better."

"i-" his jaw was clenched shut as he stepped forward. his face hovered mere inches away from yours, his breath ragged as his gaze slowly cascaded down to your lips. his breath staggered helplessly, eyes quickly darting upwards to stare you in the eyes, "why don't you go and practice? get on my fucking level instead of bitching and moaning about meaningless shit?"

ah, you had almost forgotten how quickly his saccharine words turned sour. you had almost forgotten how well-versed roronoa zoro was in destruction, whether at the court or with your heart.

a certain ache built up in your chest as you pushed him back, and for a moment you both were sixteen, having your first fight all over again. except he was taller now, his eyes hardened and his tongue sharp enough to cut through you instead of kissing you sweetly and making amends.

your lips trembled, glaring up at him as you stepped closer to the man you had once been disillusioned enough to believe you knew, "fuck you, roronoa."

"roronoa? we're being formal now?" he stared down at you, eyes boring down in yours as he held himself off with barely tangible threads of sanity. his voice was barely a whisper when he spoke again, "didn't realize that's what you called me."

"i call you nothing, let me make that clear. we are not friends nor acquaintances, strangers is all."

well, strangers don't know how it feels to kiss someone in a poorly-lit room and taste of reckless first-times and childhood innocence, they do not know of each other's long-forgotten dreams, and they certainly don't look at each other as if the only thing holding them back was their own wounded prides.

you walked past him, your shoulder brushing against his bicep as your quick steps led you away from him and into the room you had temporarily come to call home.

fuck roronoa zoro.

11:02 p.m.

you refused to go out of your room for lunch, or for dinner for that matter.

had you been a greater woman, perhaps you would have walked out, kept that conversation behind you for the next two and a half weeks, and simply focus on winning. had you been a lesser woman, perhaps you would have locked your door and cried into your sheets about anything and everything roronoa zoro.

but you did neither.

you sat on your bed and stared down the spotless ceilings, trying to come up with ideas to kill that man without ever getting caught. well no, prison be damned. orange wasn't such an awful colour anyways. if trump could make it work, so could you.

your phone buzzed, and the low rumbling pulling you out of the symphony of wicked thoughts that begged you to either go kill zoro or kiss him so hard that he forgets he belongs to this mortal plane — both ideas that would ultimately land you playing a gamble with death. you picked up the device only to come face-to-face with an email from your manager asking for updates.

to: ynlnbiz@gmail.comfrom: vsanjibiz@gmail.com do you want me to kill him? for legal reasons, this is a joke. update me on how things go. don't lose your radiance over that moss-head.

"fuck," your voice was soft as your feet hit the carpeted floors, eyes locked at the time. 11:02.

although your pride held up to the resolve to starve yourself of any human contact, your stomach sadly didn't wish to comply. an embarrassing rumble made you well-aware of your hunger and you decided with a defeated sigh to go down and beg the chef for whatever he could make you at this time of the night.

you walked to the door, opening it slowly as you came face to face with—

"you?" your pupils were blown wide open, taking in a the image of a guilty-looking zoro halfway-crouched at your door, "you."

your palm found purchase against your hips, face in an easy scowl, "what the fuck do you want, now?"

"nothing?" he argued back haughtily, pulling himself to his feet hastily, "i- i was going to the bathroom."

"on the opposite wing of the mansion?" your eyes drifted down to his hands where he held a white plastic bag, "with a whole grocery bag in your hand?"

"yes?" he clutched the bag tighter, "and it's none of your business."

you gave him a look he was well-versed in. a look that practically begged him to drop this act of nonchalance and come clean. a look roronoa zoro crumbled under.

the sportsman shifted on his feet, his eyes drifting downwards to your feet as he slowly held out the bag towards you. when he spoke, his voice was matter-of-factly, "you didn't eat today."

"huh?—" you clutched the plastic in your palms, peering down to look at two packets of familiar cup noodles, a six pack of beer and a toblerone thrown in for good measure. you looked up at the man as a strange feeling made home in your veins. warmth?

you stared at the packaging, dumbfounded, "cup noodles?"

"i- i don't know if you still like these ones." he admitted softly, gaze still avoiding yours, "but i heard you said you liked these in... in one of those interviews in the last women's singles, uh the one in tokyo—"

"you watched my match?"

his fingers twitched, "no. whatever, if you don't like it, i can just take it away—"

"—how did you think i did?"

the tokyo finals were against the number one in the female category: boa hancock. beauty, grace, talent: everything good and holy found a home in her, it seemed. because at the end of the match, she defeated you with a neck-to-neck match. your 20 points to rival her 22 points. her number one title to rival your number two.

roronoa zoro finally met your eyes, a proud wayward glint in his eyes that gnawed at your insides, and a simple "you did good."

"i lost."

"doesn't refute the fact that you did good."

"if i had done good, i would have won."

"don't talk bullshit." he crossed his arms, eyebrow arched and shoulder leaning against the doorframe. the muscle bulged under his navy blue shirt, earrings glittering cautiously in the dim light as his words cut through your flimsy counterattacks, "you did well, so, take the compliment. it's not about winning, it's about getting better. you did way better than last year's sweden semi-finals."

"you saw sweden too?" you asked softly, the disbelief in your voice evident in your face, tainting your pretty features a murky shade of confused.

but zoro refused to answer what was obvious, instead rambling on about the actual game, "your shots have gotten a lot more crisper since sweden. your breath control has gotten better, and your wrist work too. not to mention that—"

"—roronoa." you halted him, "what if you lose this tournament 'cause of me?"

"we're playing as a team. if we win, we both win. if we lose, we both lose." he didn't bother comforting you. just laid the truth bare in front of you, "simple as that."

"would you... hate me? if we lost, i mean?"

his face shifted, something inkling to the ghost of a smile on his lips, "how could i ever hate you?"

what the fuck.

your gaze betrayed you as it found a home against his lips. you mind begged for answers. why did he know all that, how did he know all that, why did he fucking care? and most importantly why were you not listening to his helpful advice, instead admiring his pretty eyes and the scar that ran across them.

zoro stopped himself, features going still as he propped himself back and stood up straight. he cleared his throat and hid his features under an usual cloak of nonchalance. the sportsman nodded to the plastic bag, "just eat, and sleep soon. we need to be up early. don't think dad's gonna let us off the hook cause we were fighting in the middle of the night."

you stared at him, a furious blush building up in your cheeks, "right, thanks." you looked down at the contents again, "but you brought me two packs and six beers?"

"and a toblerone." scrambling to find an excuse, the mosshead tripped over his own words, "i– well, i mean you must be hungry. are you not? of course, you are, right? if you don't want it, you don't have to eat it."

"no, it's just— uh, do you wanna come in?" you paused, "i... don't think I can finish six beers alone."

he stood before you dumbstruck. 5'10 of muscle and flesh and skin, standing before you with a flabbergasted look in his eyes. as if he didn't want that with every inch of his body and soul. but he was a man of great restraint, so, he shook his head, "thanks, but uh— we both need to be up early tomorrow."

your throat went dry, your words as it barely audible, "of course, see you."

"hm, yeah. g'night." he grew awkward, thumbing his earring just to have something to do, "i just didn't want you to get the wrong idea— like you know, we shouldn't fight among ourselves—"

"—no animosity between partners, as mihawk says?"

"something like that, yeah." he sighed, and you found yourself being kicked in the face by whatever self-esteem you had left. of course, he was just making amends. your wretched heart and it's stupid daydreams be damned. "okay then, i'm sorry for the morning. and uh, 'night."

"'night." he turned, ready to leave and his name left your lips before you could register what was happening, "zoro—?"

he turned around immediately, an apprehensive plea in his eyes, "yeah?"

"i—" you fished for the chocolate and held it in your hands, "you can have this, i don't really like it."

he took the bar, ideally turning it in his palm, "i thought you liked these?"

"used to. five years ago. i'm not seventeen anymore." you pressed your lips into a thin line, "people change."

"uh, yeah, i guess they do." a pause, "or maybe they... don't?"

that was the last (luke)warm conversation you had with roronoa zoro. days passed you by as did a rigorous, drilling schedule. wake up, practice, practice, practice, sleep. but hey! two and a half weeks of this and you would walk home with another champion's cup to your name, so, how bad can it possibly be?

that moss-for-brains asshole was a problem for two and a half week later you. yes. indeed. indeed.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

21st of august, 9:51 a.m.

you let out a shuddering breath, adrenaline pumping through your veins and hands gripping the handle tighter. you took a step backward, positioning yourself as zoro stood to your right, ready to serve the shot.

the sound of his racket slicing the air rang through the court as the shuttle made it's way over the net and onto your opponent's side. the woman in front of you lunged forward, shooting the shuttle back towards you.

mixed doubles champion's cup. barcelona, spain. finals. you and roronoa zoro vs. ino takuma and nobara kugisaki. your 19 points vs. their 17 points in the third round. just two more and you'd win the cup.

your arm pulled backwards, right foot behind your left, head tipped back as you smashed the shuttle back into their side towards where ino stood, ready. the shuttle whirled past his racket by a hairsbreadth and fell down on the court.

"20 love." the umpire announced pointing to you and zoro, and then to the rival team, "17 love."

just one more.

"fuck yeah." zoro gave you a feral smile. his hair was drenched, sweat slowly dripping off of his jawline. he moved forward, a new shuttle in his palm and he got ready to serve again, the jersey with roronoa on it crinkled and sticking to his back. he looked over his shoulder, giving you a nod, "ready?"

"fuckin' hope so." you huffed out, nodding slowly and backing to take your position.

the shuttle left your side of the court, tearing through air and onto their side. the air was tense, the audience growing impatient as both the teams lunged to their left and right to land definitive shots. ino takuma took a step back, jumping upwards as he delivered a smash that whirled past your cheekbone and landed on the court, "fuck."

"18 love." the umpire declared, "and 20 love."

just one more.

you walked over to zoro, and he wiped his forehead off with the back of his hand. his face was angled downwards, words right against the shell of your ear, "'s fine, we're leading. we're winning."

just one more.

the next few minutes were a battle on the court. flicks of wrist, sweat trailing down your back, the feel of feet shuffling on court as you and zoro worked in sync. his shots to your steps and your shots to his, as the team opposite to you kept up their assault.

your feet moved to their own accord, skidding forward before you jumped upwards. your racket made contact with the shuttle and you smacked it down with every bit of force you had. your breath was caught in your throat, heart beating loudly, blood rushing past your eardrums as you saw kugisaki fumble and drop the shuttle.

just one more.

a roar went through the audience, mihawk yelling out in an uncharacteristic manner, and you found yourself sinking to your knees. the court felt cold and sturdy against your knees, relief washed over your shuddering form and wayward tears pooled at the edge of your eyes. your gaze lifted up, and within the blindness from the overhead lighting, you found zoro giving you the smallest of nods with a reckless smile plastered to his lips.

and then roronoa zoro proceeded to ignore you for the rest of the evening. the problem for two and a half week later you was here. fuck.

12:44 p.m.

you glanced at the man next to you through your eyelashes. how he looked annoyed and shook his head, how those cursed earrings chimed as he answered a question that the press asked, how he ignored you for the nth hour of the night.

the fucker didn't even thank you or appreciate you to your face the entire day. what a bitch.

"is it true, then?" the reporter's bangs moved enthusiastically, "are the rumors of you dating true? everyone seems to notice that the air seems charged between the two of you."

"of course not," zoro leaned into the mic, his eyes boring holes into that reporter before he chased it away with a polite smile, "those are just rumors. we're just partners." he looked at you once, twice, "right?"

"yeah." you answered, monotone. "just rumors. having him in the same team was taxing enough for me, mentally. i cannot imagine him as a boyfriend."

the reporter grinned, as if having found something worth exaggerating, "so, was having him as a partner hard? would you say law was much better?" as the mention of the brunette, you noticed zoro pick up one of the water-bottles in front of him and attempt to crush it. the reporter paused, "and you, roronoa? was it hard for you too?"

"well, we've had our differences." he crossed his arms, letting go of the poor, unassuming bottle. was he hoping his biceps would distract the crowd of rightfully-thirsty ladies? slut.

"but the most important part of any doubles game is team-work." he continued, without even giving you half a glance, "and without her, i would have failed to win. that much is for sure."

"isn't that sweet?" the woman cooed.

isn't that sweet? no. no it is not.

"so would you partner up with each-other? are we gonna see more of this dynamic duo?"

"ah," zoro looked at you, at a loss of words. you leaned into the mic, plastering on a smile, "we'd see where fate leads us."

12:03 a.m.

fate led you here.

you stared at your phone as another headline caught your eye: turns out badminton is more than a clash of rackets, it's a clash of hearts! find our the story of roronoa zoro and his partn—

the only clashing will be of a plate against that bastard's head.

you scrolled further, just to run into another headline: roronoa zoro admits feelings in press conference after the match. click to—

your fingers hovered over the link, almost opening the headline just to confirm if they saw the same press conference as you. cause there were no feelings anywhere there. right? right.

then another: love island? no! it's the champion's cup! catch the story of team-mates turned lovers—

"—what bullshit." you huffed, scrutinizing the photo under the headline that depicted you looking at zoro as he answered some question with the caption "lovesick gaze."

you threw your phone to the side and it bounced twice before falling fce-down. a pathetic groan left your lips as you dragged your palm over your face.

you should be celebrating, getting drunk somewhere maybe? or you should be sleeping, feeling satisfied after the big win. instead, you were rotting in your bed, staring at the ceilings wondering what was the easiest way to ensure you never saw your ex again. this was a one time affair, after all. all because mihawk asked you—

knock knock knock.

your feet hit the wooden floors, absentmindedly walking to the door. did you order room service? maybe they wanted to give you a cake to celebrate you? or—

"—r-roronoa?" your words died in your throat as you stared down the man in front of you. he was dressed in a casual navy t-shirt and black sweats. his hair was wet, strands sticking to his forehead, and he held a bored look on his face. "do you want something?"

"can i come in?"

he looked tipsy.

"ye- no? no." you paused, a tsunami of emotions building within you. you were supposed to get away from him! "i need to sleep. it's late."

"this won't take long." his brows furrowed, eyes softened, "i promise."

you hesitantly stepped to the side, allowing for your former partner to step in. a sigh fell past your lips as you closed the door and locked it shut.

"what is it?" you asked, and your breath hitched as zoro stepped closer. his arm on either side of you as he peered down at you as if he would devour you whole. "w-what? roronoa."

"did you hear what they're publishing 'bout us?" his words felt like thunder against your soft skin.

"no," your face grew hot with the impossible possibility that somehow he knew what you were browsing minutes before he came. you blinked up at him. careful. "what are they saying?"

he scoffed, and stepped back, "that we're lovers. it's stupid."

you looked down at the wooden floors, goosebumps erupting across your body at the fleeting contact, "it's just gossip, it'll die down. don't worry."

"i guess." he sighed, running a hand across his face. he didn't meet your gaze, muttering a cowardly "i am gonna go, then."

"what?" you looked up at him, the fiery feeling in your body turning to soot and ash, "that is all?"

"yeah?"

"you don't wanna say anything else?" you found yourself walking forward, and he stepped back to maintain the distance. a glare crossed your pretty face, "this is it?"

"did i do something?" zoro looked from your eyes to your lips to your unrelenting steps towards him, "hey, woman?"

"hey, woman?" your brows furrowed, exasperated words tumbling past you and clashing against his stone-cold exteriors, "fucking hey, roronoa? hey! how are you!— are you fucking for real?"

you stopped a mere inches away from him, index finger jabbed against his solar plexus. you looked up at him, eyes filled to the brim with mirth as you found his, "y-you didn't even fucking thank me! or say congrats— or any fucking thing."

"i didn't?" he tried to ask but the dam of your emotions was open, the ugly and grotesque that were buried within your mortal body for five years toppling over each other till they turned even more vile, "shut up."

"after all you've done and said five years prior, i thought you would have the fucking decency to end it on a good note this time around." you scoffed, eyes boring into his, "i was fucking wrong. you can never change. you'd always be roronoa zoro, the star player. and i'd be the fool that waited on you."

your name made past his lips, eyes closing as he tried to fend himself off.

"—oh now you're using my name? after two fucking months?" the laugh that you choked out was barely a laugh. you jabbed the finger deeper against his muscled body with every stressed syllable, "you left. you fucking left me. just. like. that."

"let me explain. we were seventeen—"

"—shut up. i wake up one morning, and you're gone. you fucking left town and the next i see of you, you're on the national news winning bronze in olympics." a humorless laugh, "and all that after you said you loved me."

"i still do."

"fuck you, roronoa."

"that's not what you call me." he breathed out slowly, fingers finding purchase against your wrist and bringing your hand upwards to press a chaste kiss, "that's not my name."

"fuck you, zoro." you spat out, and your fingers pulled his face downwards and towards you. you halted, your lips a hairsbreadth away from his, and he decided to close the distance by crashing his lips to yours in a desperate kiss.

his hands skimmed over every inch of your body, never staying one place for too long — from the back of your neck to your hips — as he drunk down any unruly noises. your fingers dug deeper against his cheeks, pulling him into your impossibly closer.

"i hate you." you whispered through the fury of kisses, as the man dragged himself downwards and placing kisses across your neck. his teeth sunk against your pulse and you whimpered as he soothed the spot with another messy kiss, "i know."

all teeth and spit and broken resolves as you pushed him backwards till he fell atop your bed.

"i hate you." your body felt like lead, as if each action was one step forward to your untimely demise.

"i know." he propped himself up, face titling upwards as you sinfully teased him. your face so close to his, so pretty as you just barely kissed him, but never getting too close lest you lose control and allow your wicked fantasies to run amok.

"don't tease." he grinned — the savage kind — as a hand came up to pull your face downwards. his fingers were firm against the hollow of your cheeks and the kiss, bruising. as if he wanted to do enough damage to make up for the past five years.

"we sh- we shouldn't." you whined into the kiss as his fingers danced under your tshirt, teasing the skin with brief contact before swiping a leisurely thumb across your perky nipples. he pulled back, face flushed as his deft fingers pulled the hem of your tshirt upwards, "don't lie. you want this."

"don't get cocky." you glared daggers at him but complied nonetheless. your fingers softly over his as he dragged your oversized tshirt upwards. his breath hitched, eyes locked on how your skin erupted into goosebumps and perked up. he leaned forward, soft lips around your hardened nipple and he hummed at the contact, "'m not gettin' cocky."

you keened into his touches, fingers pulling his still damp hair, which only prompted him to suck harder, and then chased it with a soft kiss. but you grew impatient, fingers tugging at the collar of his shirt, "off."

"yes ma'am."

your fingers grabbed ahold of his jaw, tipping it backwards as you took him in. the damp hair stuck to his nape, gaze half-lidded and lips parted as he looked up at you. your gaze hardened, words caught in the thick air between you two, "this means nothing."

zoro took his shirt off, his hands pulling your warm ones to his torso. he nodded slowly, uttering false promises between open-mouthed kisses against your jaw, "nothing at all."

"i- i mean it," you whispered, your fingers tracing up and down the rigid plane of muscles and skin. your chest pressed against his as his hands snaked around your waist, "i know, baby." hot kisses smothered against your skin, "i know."

and world's number one had you pinned under him. hovering over you, the damp strands hanging loosely to frame his face. your face burned up as he traced the tip of his index finger across your face, then slowly dragged across your skin from your chest to your stomach and to the waistband of your shorts.

your hips bucked up as he thumbed the skin above the said waistband, "z-zoro."

"what do you want? tell me." his warm, calloused palms massaged your inner thighs, spreading them open to put up a show for himself. he swiped your clothed core, "wet already?"

"fuck off." a smug grin crept across his lips, head dipping down to press kisses to your exposed skin as his fingers dragged down the waistband and took off those layers off of you. he stared up, hands growing rougher, impatient, "tell me, what do you want?"

you squirmed as he continued pressing kisses, carefully avoiding your needy core. "i-" you clenched your eyes shut, embarrassment sewing itself against your skin. you mumbled, "don't make me say it."

"i need to hear ya." he licked a languid stripe, collecting the honeyed slick on the tip of your tongue. maybe he had less resolve than he had assumed, because at once he found himself licking fat strips up and down, catching your trembling bud between his lips and sucking. you tasted of divinity and sin all wrapped in one woman and he found himself at your altar, nothing more than a helpless man.

and just like that, roronoa zoro lost all sanity.

"fuck." he hummed against you, lapping at you like a man starved. his eyes stayed train on you, gaze fixated as he watched you catch your bottom lip between your teeth and arch your back. you were so pretty. it made him ache from within, something primal that made him dive into your divine cunt nose-deep and rut against the mattress like a man who knew no patience.

when roronoa zoro pulled back, you saw a man devoid of any and all trace of rationality. he was a demon ready to devour you whole. or die trying.

he held himself back, fingers digging into the fat of your thighs and hips lest he couldn't control himself. out of breath, out of mind, "tell me."

"wan' you." you mumbled, shying away from him. squirming, trying to pull away from his iron-grip on your thighs, trying, "need you t-to fuck me."

"louder." he met your eyes in a challenge, and you rivaled his stare, "fuck me."

the kiss he lay atop your hip bone was impossibly soft, his voice even more soft, "on it."

he licked quick stripes, drinking you down like you were some forbidden nectar. words barely audible as he put two fingers in your mouth. a moment later, his fingers were drilling into you. experienced hands thrusting up into you, hitting that one gummy spot over and over and over and over—

"z— ohmygod ohmygod oh—" you tried to catch your breath, tried to make sense of the situation but the mosshead caught your pulsating clit against his lips, humming and ramming into you like a mad man. watching you as you fell apart on his tongue and fingers.

twitching, bucking up, trying to run away from him as his fingers fucked you senseless. trying to run away from him?

he pulled you towards himself, putting his weight on top of your hips. you cannot run away. "don't run, don't run. not when i just got you."

"z-zoro— stop, stop it." you cried into the air, head lolling backwards as he continued his assault on your poor pussy.

"what?" he asked, gaze predatory as he continued pumping in and out of you, "see how she's gripping me? she wants me 'sbad." he thrust up harder, fingers playing against that one spot, and your body tried to turn left, to run away. but he wouldn't let you. he pulled his fingers back, just to fuck into you harder, "see. wants me so, so bad."

zoro pressed a hungry kiss to your clit, "am i taking good care of her?"

and all you could do was grip the sheets and withstand the pleasure as another tsunami built in your lower stomach. his thumb found your clit, pressing and rubbing the little nub, "answer me."

and the pressure built and built within you. tugging on your insides harshly, as he toyed with you and your aching pussy. and then it all came crashing down. spotless white washed over your eyes, head lolling back, fingers gripping the sheets so hard and a silent scream caught in your throat.

when he pulled back, his jaw was drenched, hair damp and eyes maddened. through his tunnel-vision, he found you spent on the bed. eyes clenched shut blissfully, hair tangled 'neath you, and reddened lips.

when you had the courage to open your eyes and look up at him. fuck. how dare you do that to a man? your eyes were watery, lips trembling as you told him "i can't." and roronoa zoro decided it was as good time as any to fuck you to the point of breaking.

and now he had your legs pushed to your ears, the mushroom tip dragging itself against your walls. a groan past his lips as he hooked his arm under one leg, fucking into you with all the patience in the world. so slow, so patient, so fucking agitating.

your nails dug crescent moons into his biceps, huffing out a, "f-faster, c'mon."

"hm?" his eyebrows bunched, face falling into almost a pout, "faster? think you can handle it?"

"shu-shut up ngh—" a gasp came alive as he thrust into you faster, before slowing down his pace and toying with you again. a delirious grin came to his lips as you whined out, "ugh zoro."

"just remember," he pulled it out till his tip barely kissed your entrance, and rammed it back in, "you asked for this."

and now you were pushing the same nails in his biceps, gasping as he fucked into you with abandon. he pressed kisses to your thighs, to your knees, to any part of you that was accessible to him. hot breath fanning over your skin as his dick pumped in and out of you.

"'fuck, 'zo—" he hissed like it hurt, thrusting harder at the nickname. his pace was bruising, intentions to destroy you, "say that again."

"wh-what?" you played dumb.

strong hands came up to manhandle you to sit you atop him. searing hands on your hips as he moved you up and down his cock. a stutter made past your lips as you fell forward at the sudden change in position. hands bracing themselves against the hard muscle, you bit down on your lips, eyes rolling back, "i— fuck f-fuck, zo."

balls slapping against your ass, the sound of skin on skin deafening enough between his groans and your gasps. his grip on your unforgiving as you he helped you downwards each time to meet his erratic thrusts.

heaving, sweat trailing down his bow, your nails digging into his chest as you hugged him so sinfully tight. what were you doing to this poor man and his sanity? spasming, clenching around him, unforgiving, as he rammed upwards into you.

"i-i'm gon' cum—"

"yeah?" he breathed out, eager fingers coming to tease your puffy clit. sporadic swipes of his thumb against the aching nub, raising himself up to slowly bite down on the column of your throat, "cum f'me."

"ohmygod ohmygod zo—" head thrown back, you choked back sobs of his name as the white-hot pleasure built in your stomach and released all over his abs and chest, "fu-fuck ngh sh-shit, zoro!"

you, covered in your own essence, head thrown back, hair sticking to your chest and back, face flushed, eyes clenched shut. you.

zoro turned you around, your helpless moans trapped against the pillow as his heel dug into the dirtied mattress, and he drilled his cock into you harder and harder and harder. no rhythm, no reason as he chased his own high within you.

your overstimulated cunt spasmed around him, hugging his curved dick like you were milking him for all he was worth. fuck. fuck. fuck.

"ah— fuck." he groaned in the shell of your ear, tongue darting out to lick a languid stripe at the base of your ear as you felt his hips stutter, emptying within you.

his sweaty body stilled above yours, pressing you down into the sticky mattress. a moment later, he heaved out a content sigh and pulled it out. hitched breaths, a new wave of need building within him as he stared at the milky white gushing out of your pretty cunt.

mindlessly, his fingers pushed back the creamy white back into your poor, trembling hole. he swiped at your clit one last time, and you jolted under his torturous touches. a whine into the pillow, hips bucking away from him. you warned him, "zo."

"hah, sorry." he grinned, amused at your compliant state, before collapsing next to you.

you raised your flushed face, dazed eyes finding his pretty face next to you. he looked so pretty, it hurt. his flushed face illuminated by the soft lighting from the bedside lamps, the earrings glinting as they chimed softly against his skin, the soft smile that tugged at his lips.

this was roronoa zoro, the star player.

his fingers slowly came up to your face, pushing the damp hair strands backwards. the same fingers then traced over your nose, and your bottom lips.

and there was you, the fool that always stayed.

"zo... zoro." you pulled away from his skimming touches, "you— uh, what's the time?"

you looked away from him to pick up your phone: 2:11 a.m.

"it's late." shutting the phone, you didn't turn to look at him. what if he called out your name, looked at you, persuaded you? softly, you whispered into the heady air, "you should go back to your room. it's late, and i wanna sleep."

"wh- what are you doin'?" his hands ran over your arms, desperate touches bringing you back flush against his naked chest.

"zoro." you turned to look at him, eyes barely able to hold his steady gaze, "i-" you sucked in a breath, eyes tracing downwards to stare down his tan chest, "this meant nothing, you know that."

a scoff, "are—" the expression died, eyes widening, "should i actually leave?"

you nodded before pulling back from him, "go."

"please, just listen to me—" he sat up, shoulders squaring up as if he was ready to put up a combat for that explanation. his fingers years to touch yours, "i can explain."

you pulled your hand back, holding them against your chest. your resolved hardened. this was roronoa zoro, the star player. and this was you, and you were on your goddamn level now. no longer the fool that stuck around.

"go back to your room, rorona."

"r-roronoa? it's 'zo, for you." he begged, shifting to turn fully towards, "listen to me just once."

you shook your head, "no explanation will be good enough—"

"—i couldn't say goodbye to you. or i would have never felt like leaving that town." he pleaded, hands coming up to cradle your cheek, "and that town was a dead-end for my career. i had to leave—"

"then, leave right now as well. you're good at that shit, anyways."

"please—"

"leave."

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

22nd of august, 12:03 p.m.

when you saw roronoa zoro at the checkout counter, you pretended he didn't exist. he was dead. to you, anyways.

the mosshead didn't bother making conversation, too busy comprehending the reality where you didn't even bother looking at him twice. not even as you clutched the LV in your hands tighter, and walked out through the glass doors and out where your driver waited for you.

the chants of your name stopped you dead in your tracks as a swarm of reporters stood to your left, being held off by the hotel security. the swarm of cameras, notepads and haunting questions being pushed back by men in black, pristine suits.

"is it true?!" a shrill, familiar voice caught your attention. you dragged your shades upwards, giving the reporter from yesterday a compliant smile, "is what true?"

"that you and roronoa zoro are together?!"

your eyebrow twitched, and you dragged the sunglasses downwards. the world was tinted a dark brown, and you put on another polite smile. that bastard be damned. "n—"

"yeah." the jock called out, a self-satisfying smile on his face as he stood behind you. his arm came to wrap around you, flesh against flesh feeling familiar as he pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead, "got a problem with that?"

you whipped to look at the man that had come to become the bane of your existence and the object of your desires. but before you knew what was happening, you were being ushered by his 5'10 self into the car backseat. when you came back to reality, the car was already was on the highway and zoro was looking out the window as if he didn't just do that.

"what the fuck?!" your voice was shrill, "what the fuck, roronoa? what did you just do?!"

"it's good for publicity." he replied, solemnly. "my manager told me to do that."

"which deranged bastard is your manager?" you fisted your hand, the leather handle of the purse almost disintegrating under the intensity. glaring at him with murderous intent, you choked out a, "tell me now and i'll get sanji to murder him."

"her." zoro corrected, "name's nami. she's the best in the game."

"you're dead, roronoa."

"ah, no i'm not." he grinned, a mad man. "cheer up, babe. we have appearances to keep up."

what the fuck.

a/n: hello. uh, i have nothing to say except i just really wanted to write this 🤡. not proofread cause its uhm 10k words. nobody's gonna read this shit anyways, i think. if you've read this whole, THANK YOU!!! MWUAH MWUAH MAY BOTH SIDES OF YOUR PILLOW BE COLD AND YOU GET TO EAT SOMETHING GOOD <3 part two? yes, i wanna. roronoa zoro being a menace is my favourite gender. [psss, if you've sent in requests, girlie IM TRYING IM SORRY. may lord give me strength, and i may give you some fics!] tagging: @help-i-lost-my-sock because ur the only one with enough strength to read this. thankyou so much for putting up with my bs <3 m.list

[redfurrycat]

🔥 ⚽ 🐓 Doctor Mother Goose Bradshaw & Doctor Rooster Bradshaw AU 🐓⚽️🔥

*

AU in which Nick Bradshaw never went the RIO road, instead he became a Navy doctor and his first ever patient was one fighter pilot Pete "Maverick" Mitchell.

Friendship at first sight. When Mav ended up at the hospital because of his shenanigans, he got lectured by Dr. Mother Goose every. single. time.

*

At some point, the good doctor got to listen to a loopy Mav's impassioned speeches about a blonde ice cube.

He met said blonde pilot who once came to visit Mav with flowers.

Well, he was pushed into Mav's room, rather rudely, by his giant of a RIO.

"Huh. Blonde Ice Cube, I presume?"

"It's Mister Iceman to you doctor!"

"Oh. And you are?"

"Free for a coffee right now. I think it best to leave these two alone."

Thia is how Doctor Mother Goose met Hulking Guy. Instant meet-cute.

*

Many years later, his son Bradley became a doctor. Chief Dr Bradshaw loved to dump his idiot best friend into Dr Bradshaw's care.

"What did you do AGAIN, Mav?!".

Then Mav tried to justify himself but it's hard to resist Baby Goose's sad brown eyes. So, he always tried to be on his best behaviour. Only for his favourite godson though.

*

Of course one of Mav's precious Daggers had to be hospitalised because of a training accident.

Jake "Hangman" Seresin thought for a moment the accident was way more serious 'cause wasn't he seeing double?

"Wow. Are there two Dr. Mc Steamy & Dreamy Moustache? Wow. Lucky me. Coyote. Do you see that?! Wow. Do you do house visits in case I have a problem later? Yes or Yes?"

"OMG. Don't flirt with my father!"

"But you don't mind my flirting with you, I hope?"

"Nope. He doesn't mind. And he's single."

"OMG. DAD. Don't pimp me?!"

"Ah. You do your best Navy fighter pilot a great service. Much appreciated Older Dr Sexy."

"Uh-huh. I'm out of here. You got it, son?"

"Ooooooh. Dad and son? Nice."

"Oh my god."

"Jake's fine for you, Sugar."

*

UPDATED!

[Art Commission drawn by the very talented @enthyrea 💖]

[hypewinter]

3 HC/AU Prompt Thing (4)

1). Full Ghost AU

2). Tim's Fake Uncle

3). Cursed Tim AU

Danny has been a ghost for a while. Which means nothing shocks him. Nothing. So some kid summoning him to participate in a ruse so that he doesn't get adopted? An average Tuesday. Seriously you wouldn't believe how many requests he's gotten that are oh so similar to this one. Now the spell around the boy's heart. That's new.

So instead of using his usual method of getting out of such requests ("Sorry kid the fabric of the universe would be undone by fulfilling that request. You know how it is.") Danny finds himself saying "Sure, why not?"

What follows is a series of shenanigans in which Danny helps this boy, Tim, evade his would-be guardian while also getting to the bottom of the curse around his heart. As it turns out, Bruce isn't too bad of a guy and Tim is just worried about replacing his father. It also turns out that the poor guy shouldn't get too hung up on that fact as Danny finds out his father made a deal with a demon. He exchanged his son's fortune for the sake of the Drake family having more luck.

This worked for a time but in true Monkey's Paw fashion, since Tim was also a Drake, his bad luck began to affect the family's luck. Whaaaa? No way. Who could have seen that coming? Danny rolls his eyes as he manages to negotiate with the demon to switch the contract over to him in exchange for a hefty sum. Which in reality were mere droplets in a vast ocean to the King of the Infinite Realms but this demon didn't need to know that.

Now Danny has gone from the fake guardian of Tim to the real guardian of Tim. In the legal, social, and now even the paranormal sense of the word. Though he doesn't mind sharing him with Bruce Wayne.

[shu-box-puns]

Listen I might have made myself guilty of devouring your grumpy!Dad Tsu'tey AU and loving it. (Unironically bless your heart for giving us that gift.)

I DO however love angst. So imagine a scenario of the "AU" where Spider got captured in which he also lost his memories ? And Quaricht took that ball and ran with it ?

How would Tsu'tey react when after MONTHS of Spider having been captured, of him not knowing where is son is or how save he is, Tsu'tey is met with a Spider not knowing who he is.

How'd Tsu'tey react to seeing his boy with hair cut short, decked out in RDA/military garb fully believing he was always with them ? How would he react to Spider not only having no idea who Spider even is (calling himself Miles) but also calling the demon Quaritch "father".

And worst of all, how's Tsu'tey dealing with the fact that Spider views him nothing more than another enemy ? Having no recollection of anything before he got captured - fully believing the story Quaritch told him of "savag Na'vi warriors".

(Bonus if when Tsu'tey manages to ring him down/take him with him, he sees actual genuine fear in Spider's eyes)

As an angst enjoyer myself, I AM IN LOVE! *Is visibly vibrating with excitement* I love this concept! The ANGST would be delicious and plentiful! As if this poor man hasn't already lost everything, and now you plot to take away his son too! You're evil and I LOVE it!

To put it simply, Tsu'tey would be devastated.

He would be absolutely devastated, to see every aspect of Spider's childhood wiped from his son's appearance, only to be replaced with RDA military attire instead.

Let's imagine Tsu'tey's somehow comes across Spider in the forest, and he's tucked out of sight in a tree, whilst the recom squad passes noisily below.

Tsu'tey is tense on his branch, reaching for an arrow as his eyes scan their numbers. The sight of avatar sized guns strapped to the recoms' backs make his stomach turn. His bullet scars itch at the memory of what a mere human sized weapon could do, he could only image the devastation those weapons could create.

And then his breath faulteres as his eyes fall on his son.

His son who has been missing for several months, and now looks alien to him.

His boy whose braids that Tsu'tey spends every second week brushing out and rebraiding, had been hacked off, the blond hair shorn close to the scalp all over. His boy, who has switched out his loincloth for stuffy trousers and a stiff shirt. His person entirely devoid of all Omaticayan accents and his jewellery that the Sully kids made him completely gone. His boy who no longer wears the blue painted stripes that closely resembled Tsu'tey's own markings. His boy who is wearing BOOTS of all things!

Since he could walk, Spider had always rejected boots to the point of breaking down until his feet were free. Eywa, the boy could not even tolerate socks.

What really unsettles him however, is how at ease Spider clearly is in the presence of the recoms. How he jokes with the lower ranking officers and easily accepts rough shoulder pats from the demon clone of his biological father. It's such a stark difference to when Tsu'tey last saw him biting and screaming at them all, in a feeble attempt to get away, that it makes him freeze.

Now lets also imagine that Spider is briefly separated from the recoms, perhaps to refill his canteen in a nearby river whilst the patrol walks on ahead. Meanwhile, Tsu'tey silently descends from the canopy, and appears at Spider's elbow. He crouches low so the patrol won't see him, his bow tucked over his shoulder, before he leans in close to his boy, keeping his voice low.

<"Spider-"> He gets out nothing else, as the boy abruptly flinches away and turns on him. His canteen tumbles into the river and is washed away by the current, but Tsu'tey is only briefly distracted by it, because Spider has drawn a utility knife and is pointing it at Tsu'tey. But worst of all, he's not seeming to recognise him.

<"Spider."> Tsu'tey soothes, eyes searching his son's wild gaze. The boy is visibly shaking, the knife waving in his unsteady grasp as it hovers between father and son. <"Be calm. It is only me."> "Who the fuck are you!?" Spider demands way too loudly. "And why the hell can I understand you?"

Tsu'tey's ears fall in dismay. He can't image what his boy has been through that he cannot remember his own father's face. Licking his lips, Tsu'tey shifts on his hunches. He keeps his hands visible and his posture relaxed. Spider isn't calming down in his presence, and it is almost as unsettling as the obvious fear in the boy's expression. "Spider, it's me, your Dad, remember?" He points to himself.

"No you're not!" Spider instinctively corrects, he swallows loudly, and seems to get the message that Tsu'tey isn't about to attack him and sits up. He's still clearly uneasy, keeping the knife firmly between them, but he's no longer looking like he's about to bolt. "Now look, I have no idea who you are or why you keep calling me 'Spider', my name is Miles. But, you cannot be here! If my Dad catches you he will kill you."

<"I will kill him first!"> Tsu'tey knee jerkingly promises, only to quiet again when Spider looks startled. Tsu'tey can hear the recom squad circling back, and needs to make a decision. <"As you said, there is no time. We must go now!">

"I don't know you!" Spider repeats, "I'm not going anywhere with you!"

<"Yes you do, and you are!"> Tsu'tey insists. <"Now stop being difficult!"> Mind made up, Tsu'tey abruptly leaned forward and scooped Spider out of the dirt and up over his shoulder. The boy is startling light in his arms, way lighter than he had been months before his capture, but there's no time to think about it, because Spider is wriggling and getting louder.

"PUT ME DOWN!" Spider screeches, thumping his fist down on Tsu'tey's shoulder blade as the hunter rose to his feet and leapt across the river. "STOP! PUT ME DOWN!" Spider begs frantically as Tsu'tey hauls him away from the river and into the undergrowth. "DAD!" His boy screams, yelling for the help of someone else. "DAD! HELP! DAD!"

Shouts from the recom squad sound from beyond the river. There's splashing and then the snap of twigs.

"DAD!" Spider screams again, the volume of his voice startling the birds overhead.

"Be quiet Spider." Tsu'tey finds himself pleading.

"PUT ME DOWN!"

Tsu'tey does not.

Spider keeps yelling for help.

The recoms begin to gain on them.

And then suddenly, there's a sharp pain digging deep into Tsu'tey's shoulder blade. He cries out, his grip instinctively loosening on Spider who finds his opening and rips himself free. He tumbles from Tsu'tey's shoulder and flops heavily into the dirt with a groan, as the hunter feels warmth flip down his spine from the stabbing pain in his shoulder.

<"What did you do?"> Tsu'tey asks through gritted teeth, trying in vain to see why he hurts, whilst Spider sits collapsed in the undergrowth, looking pale. His knife is no longer in hand, and Tsu'tey can see blood dripping down his lower back and onto the backs of his thighs. <"You stabbed me."> He says aloud, his voice wobbling with the realisation.

And the knife is still in him.

Whilst Spider rolls onto his back and stares up at him with his jaw hanging open in shock, Tsu'tey tries to wrap his head around what has just happened. Spider stabbed him. Spider raised his knife to him. He has NEVER done that before.

The recoms are definitely closing in, but Tsu'tey is too preoccupied.

His throat is tight as he strains to see over his shoulder, his hand pulling his side forward so the skin shifts painfully. But there it is. Buried hilt deep into his flesh, puncturing one of the old bullet scars from the very first war.

Eyes wide in disbelief, he looks back down to his son. His beautiful boy who is shaking and pale, tears collecting along his waterline.

"Leave." Spider whispers wetly.

<"Spider."> Tsu'tey soothes, he swallows tightly, hating the feeling of blood running down his back and dripping onto the back of his thighs. It would heal, he told himself, this didn't mean anything. <"It is okay, I am not angry."> Instinctively, he steps forward to soothe his son as he has countless times before, but for the second time today, Spider scrambles back desperately, eyes wide and frantic.

"Please." His boy emphasises, his legs drawn up close to him as if to block a blow. And he looks so scared and so pale, Tsu'tey is forced to retreat back.

He doesn't want to leave him. Not like this, confused and malnourished. But there is no time.

The shouts of the recoms grow alarmingly close. And Tsu'tey has to go. Every instinct rebels, but he knows he must. He must return to the village, get patched up an return with backup. Anyone, he would even take Jake with him if it ensured Spider would return home safe.

<"I will be back."> He promises, despite how the words clearly unsettle Spider. Whatever this is, they will get past it. Tsu'tey promises himself, as he slips away back into the undergrowth, the pain of his shoulder finally beginning to make itself known now that the shock was wearing off. One way or another, he would get his son back.

[im-not-buying-it-ether]

Okay but now I feel compelled to wonder, in that fun AU of CC and Marilyn being Captain and Mary Marvel, what their lives as heroes would be like

Like, villains are the same for the most part with probable lack of antagonism with Sivana, he’s the dude who hired them for the dog in the first place with the public intent of a historical attraction at a park and on the side of the bus he’s campaigning for mayor. Other than that, villains seem to be the same from the brief moments we see.

They stay out of the limelight, they prioritize keeping their identities hidden for the sake of Billy and Mary’s saftey and childhoods, and they take their duties seriously.

But what’s tingling at the brain right now is how they’d interact with the rest of the world of DC, heroes and teams and whatnot, outside of Fawcett and the menagerie of characters there. We know CC accidentally stumbled onto some daring scene with Spy Smasher and the bunch (no joke, time was funky in Fawcett and CC was alive at that time) but I’d love to see him with other heroes

Like, say he fills the normal roles in comics Billy would’ve, joins JLI and, like his son, tries calling the other heroes out for acting like bigger juveniles than his actual kids and ditches bc apparently the people who save the world on the regular cant not try and fist fight the other every few hours. He’s on and off some team, focusing on his city and his family more and more, pops in for bigger fights when they occur but is mostly hometown based and handles his own issues.

Of newer stuff, I turn to YJ’s tv show for another idea. Aka, CC also being a chaperone for the Team at the same time Billy comes in but with a twist, turns out his kids have a percolation for magic and have been getting the hang of some spells so they’re joining the Team too while CC is on chaperone duty. So leads Billy and Mary’s attempt at a slow entrance into heroism that immediately backfires when they get captured, cue heartwarming scene of dad hugging his kids after a dangerous situation that follows him tearing the base apart looking for them. True dad fashion and all that. What becomes complicated is the World Without Grown Ups plot, in which I say have Billy and his had pre-the plot agree that Billy can have Shazam powers for super big emergencies and Billy definitely counts all adults disappearing as an emergency. Cue once more the fun father son bonding of Billy looking just like his old man with Shazam powers.

Onto Marilyn, who unfortunately doesn’t seem to have more beyond “clever” and “good mom” from comics, but she’s got her hutzpah and would probably be as active a hero as CC while still prioritizing her life and family over heroism. The whole Shazam thing is definitely more a job than it is what kind of person she is, she’s an archeologist and likes that profession more than she likes worrying about everyone else. She’s definitely more no nonsense and, if there’s a difference, she’d probably prefer the more grounded crime fighting than the mystical shenanigans CC would do in her stead. Billy and Mary end up closer to her in quality time since that focus of crime fighting keeps her grounded.

Also, the general vibes of the Captain Marvel tropes. Such as the identity shenanigans.

It is a fun thing of fanfic that, since his civilian identity is very vulnerable and people like their identity plots, Billy has his questioned or revealed a lot. Add in CC as Marvel instead and it flips a bit to be a man who is well known in his home city whose entire family, non-powered children included, could easily become targets if anyone knew who he was. And he’s deliberately secretive about it for that purpose, he’s protecting his children with his wife. So, perspective, there’s a new hero who comes in with a hero partner who is also their life partner. They have the power of actual gods and titans, they don’t explain anything past some nebulous Wizard they can’t name as to how they got their powers, they are very hush-hush on their normal lives but everyone knows they have to have one. It’s hard to contact them, you don’t know they’re working or traveling or with their kids because you don’t know they do work or that they have kids, so you worry what they’re up to for what seems to be every hour they aren’t begrudgingly saving the world with the rest of the heroes. You catch them talking to the other but the minute they hear you they clam up and change everything about how they were just a second ago, you could swear they were talking about digs or gods or bringing someone home but you don’t know anything because you don’t know them.

Cue the mistrust, the reveals, how it all goes wrong and someone gets hurt, be it the other when they don’t have their powers or their kids and suddenly you’ve pissed off the man who loves his family so much he was tearing the multiverse open to try and keep the timeline going where they were all alive and happy together and the woman who loves those kids just as much. Or, say that reveal had villains get both of the Batsons, and now those heroes have to look those orphans in the eye and beg forgiveness, and when fate still demands its heroes out comes two new ones that make it seem like the whole Batson sham was fake and no way Marilyn and CC were the Marvels, the marvels are still flying around after they’ve gone and gotten dead and buried. Cue those heroes looking at the new Captain and Mary Marvel, knowing it’s the kids they accidentally made orphans wearing the faces of the friends they betrayed.

[syndrossi]

I'm sure that in Regnal au Baelon will be Rhaegar's absolute favorite (largely because he reminds him so much of Jaehaerys II). Baelon himself is in near tears at this fact, Daemon is a bit jealous and nags at his son "who's your father here?" but it's from the happy look of his father that he forgives Rhaegar such favoritism. Especially when he has Jon, who is thrilled with his father.

I mean, I'm pretty sure both boys will adore Daemon as their father! But I can see Rhaegar sneaking into small council sessions and listening attentively at King Baelon's side, so serious and contemplative that Baelon jokingly asks for his advice, then gets spooked when he answers as Aemon might have. (Daemon and Viserys will likely be on the council, and Daemon is both amused and also spooked by it.)

And then you have Jon pretending to be Baelon the Brave, which brings a bittersweet joy to the king's heart too. I could see him having a lot of fun mock sword-fighting with the boys and Daemon.

The great thing is that Rhaenyra, Laenor, and Laena will all be around the same age as the twins, so you've got five children getting into shenanigans together, forming bonds with various older family members! (Granted, Laena and Laenor will be spending most of their time at Driftmark, but I'm sure they'll visit often!)

[watercloud7]

BATFAM PROMPT:

Feral Talon Dad Bruce Wayne AU

The bat kids are raised by a Cryptid zombie horror murder man who loves them very very much❤️

Bruce is sent to kill the Graysons by the court of Owls and kidnap their child to make him a Talon.

Dick witnesses the whole thing but because he’s so young in this AU like basically a toddler he’s terrified and when Bruce picks him up to take him back to the Owls Dick snuggles into him and sobs and screeches and he’s angry and confused and scared and tiny but This massive murder monster who killed his parents is the only comfort he has.

Dick is alone and he has no one. No one is coming to save him, no one is coming for him , his mama and daddy are gone and the only thing left is …. Whatever the hell this cryptid horror zombie is.

So Dick, takes his comfort where he can, which today comes in form of zombi does Bruce Wayne and that’s what it takes i guess.

Bruce breaks out of conditioning and vanishes into thin air with the kid. Only he doesn’t go back to the court.

Maybe this Bruce takes baby Grayson away and raises him as a feral murder baby.

They live secluded and away from anyone and anything. Maybe the mountains in Nanda parbat. They’re so discreet and good the league of assassins doesn’t even know their mountains are technically compromised.

Bruce raises Dick in complete secrecy. Literally like a wild child, Bruce occasionally travels to the town over to bring back toys and books and whatever he finds that he thinks would make Dick happy.

Dick sees and longs for peoples and connections and more. He loves Bruce but Bruce is basically like Ariel’s dad WORSE he’s basically mother gothel, he’s seen so many horrors and he’s so paranoid. He just wants his son to stay alive and away from any harm.

keeping Dixk locked away and safe from the Owls that mean him horrific torture and agony. Safe from the world, Safe with Daddy😭❤️.

SIGN LANGUAGE ENTHUSIAST BATFAM HEADCANON.

Bruce’s voice is … zombified and uncomfortable to use, so he teaches himself sign language and then teaches Dick. They invent their own dialect. Just for them😭

Dick gets big enough to want to see the world, to understand what happened, to find himself outside of his adopted eldritch Dad, and MAYBE! Make a damn friend like he’s been seeing in those picture books Bruce brings for him every week.

He “runs away” in a fit of teenage rebellion or whatever you wanna call it, after Dick gets caught sneaking into a village a couple kilometres from their Cosy little cave they like to call home.

Bruce is furious and terrified and he’s everything a scared father is after finding your kid missing from their room when they were supposed to be home hours ago.

Dick explodes in frustration and tears and off he goes.

He goes back to the beginning. To Gotham.

A half deadly Half sunshine all Feral Dick Grayson is roaming the world all alone when he stumbles across a considerably less feral

Less deadly Jason Todd.

Jay is an orphan and this weirdly affectionate clueless terror of a guy just imprinted on him

and won’t leave him alone.

I mean Scary bird boy is a stage 5 dumbass, zero bark, Zero bite 100% cuddles kinda guy.

(Seriously this dude has no concept of personal space and it’s bordering on infuriating) but Jason is like 99.9% sure he just saw him down crime alley snapping the resident rapists necks.

The men that call girls avoided and the police did isn’t care to arrest, so clearly bird boy is not a bad guy but he’s definitely not Harmless either.

Jason likes his style though.

Maybe the court of owls tries going after Jason or tries to kidnap Dick again.

Bruce finds them in the nick of time and slaughters every single one of the Owls once and for all.

Shenanigans ensue and they all bond.

Love love love. Bruce literally adopts him the minute he sees him.

Bruce and Dick teach Jay sign language.

Jason teaches Bruce and Dick how to read.

Jason loves his feral dad and brother.

MAYBE! Tim parents were Owls.

The rich wealthy elites of Gotham succumb to their nefarious ways in an ironic and cathartic end, survived by their heir Timothy Jackson Drake. Who up until now they had been grooming into becoming the next Owl man, he’s been trained to kill and torture and every other bad guy skills he needs to be their evil little successor.🫡

Bruce gets rid of them though.

WOMP WOMP.

Maybe after killing Timmy’s parents Bruce is just like…

Bruce: awwwwww this reminds me of how Dick’s surprise adoption went!

Tim:…. Bro you can’t just murder my parents and call this a surprise adoption.

Bruce: we can call this a kidnapping if you wanna keep it 💯 but either way you’re coming home with me

Tim: …. I ain’t even like em like that fr. Let me just pack a bag real quick.

The Drakes parenting was abhorrent so after Bruce kidnaps him ,Tim is viciously violent at first but after Bruce shows Tim patience and kindness.

Tim develops Stockholm syndrome like instantly and just latches onto Bruce like it’s the first instance of true love and care he’s ever felt.

Jason is actually the most normal and well

adjusted out of his Psychotic family. Ironically he’s the only one out of all of them that hasn’t killed someone lol.

Tim latches on violently to Dick & Jason, it’s adorable and scary and very creepy in a wholesome way. Tim absorbs any kind of attention like a sponge and has separation anxiety. He likes to watch them sleep and follow them every where they go like a puppy, only he does it in the shadows and takes candid pictures of them he collects religiously.

He’s a complete weirdo.

Dick finds him Absolutely delightful, he wants to gobble him all up and cuddle at every opportunity, he enables all Of his bad habits and Jason does his best to damage control and encourage Tim to dabble in more healthy hobbies and ways of showing affection but ultimately Dick Grayson remains undefeated as a bad influence.

Dick is a good big brother, so obviously he’s gotta participate in his baby brothers love language so Timmy can feel seen and appreciated.

So now Jason has TWO stalkers shadowing him everywhere he goes. 3 when Bruce is feeling sentimental.

Jason tolerates his families psychotic and feral behaviour because he loves them more then life itself and if anyone else said anything like that about them he’d snap their necks.

Jason shows his affection in normal ways like beating up peoples trying to start a fight with his brothers and cooking for them because they can’t cook to save their lives.

Sometimes Jason will wonder on how exactly Dixk survived all those years in that cave with an immortal Bruce who doesn’t need to eat.

(Bruce would catch wild animals and Dixk

Would eat the meat raw, sometimes he’d hold his blood soaked hand full of flesh out wanting to share with dad, but Bruce would just drag Dick closer to him and nudge him to keep eating his dinner)

Jason feels bad and bakes him sugary monstrosities included but not limited too:

Oreo chocolate chip maple soaked marshmallow pancakes.

Sour candy lucky charm jam filled donuts.

Triple Chocolate Nutella and peanut butter Reese cookies.

Jason is appropriately horrified at what he’s created every time.

But Dick tasted sugar for the first time and doesn’t know how to act.

The kids are living their best lives but Bruce Is SPIRALLING.

The more kids Bruce acquires the more stressed he gets.

There’s a really angsty scene where Bruce breaks down holding onto his kids and crying. He’s not a monster, he just wants these kids to be safe. He doesn’t wanna kill anymore, he doesn’t wanna hurt things anymore.

He wants to go home with his babies.

He wants to take all of them back to their busted creepy cave in nanda parbat.

But Dickie Isn’t a baby anymore, he wants his family close but he also wants MORE, he wants to be around people he wants to discover the world. Jason was born and raised in Gotham and Bruce can’t in good conscience rip his life apart like that.

And then there’s Timmy. Honestly the Tim is this AU is an unhinged obsessive gremlin, he just goes wherever his family wants to go, nothing else really matters to him but them.

And so Bruce decides to stay in Gotham and hides them all in an abandoned building. It’s kind of like a nest.

Bruce stashes his babies in a Makeshift safe house until he can figure out a way to make all this work.

Maybe Alfred finds their weird little makeshift Family when he stumbles into their safe house and manages not to get immediately killed.

Alfred is VERY worried about the state in which these kids are living.

He vows to lure them and their Dad to a safer better living arrangement.

Maybe Bruce gets severely hurt and the kids kidnap Alfred to patch Bruce up.

Alfred is appropriately horrified at the undead creature growling and hissing while he treats their mortally terminal wounds, but keeps as much composure as an ex-military general would about it.

Bruce like totally imprints on Alfred And like a cat, he drags each and every one of his kids into Alfred life for him to babysit and look after while Bruce goes out to do whatever zombie dads do.

Alfred has no choice in the matter and has effectively acquired spontaneous grandkids and a son.

Bruce: daddy?

Alfred: …. Boy do I look like-⁉️

They move in with Alfred basically over night.

Damian is either created Through the league of assassins who stole the courts strongest talon’s DNA (Bruce’s DNA) to recreate it. Or any other way I guess I donno? Maybe Talia and Bruce got jiggy with It at one point when they were in those mountains. PFFFF LOL GIVE ME IDEAS.

Gonna run with the first idea ?

Damian is created in a lab, Maybe the Drakes latest project was too recreate their greatest success which had been Talon!Bruce.

Tim revisits his parents lab randomly and discovers this. An abandoned lab and abandoned cryogenic chamber containing a baby.

Tim grabs the kids and runs back home.

Jason is exasperated and Alfred panics a bit cause…. Huh?!?!

Jason: Seriously guys? We can’t afford Another surprise adoption right now.

Alfred: do you mean a “kidnapping”

Jason: don’t be mean! It’s their love language 😡

Alfred: wonderful… is it safe to assume I’ll be raising yet another grandchild?

Jason: that’s the spirit, anyway we gotta find a much bigger apartment than this, it’s getting crowded.

Alfred: Ah, my sincerest apologies for the inconvenience caused by my oversight. It seems I should have anticipated my being abducted by a feral street urchin and his entourage of lethal pets. Quite the oversight on my part, I’ll begin apartment hunting right away sir.

Bruce, Dick, Jason, Tim, Damian: *living their best life while Alfred tries to wrangle them out of shenanigans*

Anyways They take Damian in and he’s just as feral and eldritch horror as his daddy. He’s got his big brother’s trademark behaviours too!

Tim’s severely anti social mess , Dick’s creepy uncanny valley nature and Jason’s love for baking!

It’s so sweet how much he takes after his sibling and Bruce couldn’t be more proud of his litter of horror.

Alfred is honestly such a trooper through all this, salute the GOAT.

I wrote this on a whim! If y’all wanna hear more about this AU, if you want it written, let me know!

[kivaember]

AC coffee shop au idea

i went briefly insane over on twitter but like, big idea for a low energy, self-indulgent fun coffee shop au:

The Redgun Cafe is owned by Michigan who was an ex F1 racer, now retired, and several of his employees are like ppl from his career or just scruffed off the street (Iguazu).

Iguazu is the main barista of Redgun Cafe and he makes THE BEST COFFEE EVER it is ambrosia it's perfect it's just that he's an asshole with a sour personality and no customer service skills whatsoever

Across the street (directly across the street) is the Vesper's Lounge, a rival cafe that's very ritzy, very fancy and expensive. It's owned by Freud who ALSO owns a hobby shop on the same street that sells mecha model kits.

Their main barista is Rusty, who can make a decent enough coffee, but in sharp contrast to Iguazu, is very charming and uses his attractiveness to lure in customers. Also has hidden expert baking skills since his father, Flatwell, owns a bakery

YEAH SO Flatwell owns a bakery on the same street. The food there is legendary. His daughter, Ziyi, helps him run it. Rusty does as well when he's not working at Vesper's Lounge

Rusty works at Vesper's Lounge for two reasons: extra money, and because he gets a discount at Freud's hobby shop. Rusty and Freud are both gunpla enthusiasts. Somehow no one else knows that they're gunpla otaku buddies...

Carla owns a bar on the same street called Carla's Bar, and it's a hole in the wall bar that's sustained only by its regulars. She's fucking loaded though, bc she has other businesses elsewhere too.

Walter and 621 work at Carla's bar as bartenders (Walter also does 'other work' (information brokering) for Carla). 621 is Walter's adopted son as well.

The Hounds (617, 619 and 620) run a garage (owned by Carla) and are regulars to the bar. They've taken 621 under their wing.

Ayre is 621's online friend that lives in another country. They play a lot of online games together and also send each other letters and gifts... they've known each other for many years

Anyway the overall plot of this would be... the zany shenanigans this insane street will get up to. Everyone knows Carla's involved in shady shit - probably criminal! - but they just pretend not to notice. It's much more fun watching Snail and Michigan locks horns over their cafe rivalry while Freud keeps trying to turn Vesper's Lounge into a Mecha Cafe (Snail keeps saying no). At some point 621 and Rusty start dating and it's cute and schmoopy. The end.

I WANNA WRITE THIS...