#Crack

[the-storm-chaser]

..THE BLONDE TRIO EVERYBODY!

@harbingers-almanac

[umossu]

The early bird gets with the worm ;-)

[30somethingautisticteacher]

I figured it out, guys! The only way this break up makes sense. Episode 6, 6 month anniversary, Kinsey 6.

666 the Devil's number. Clearly, Tommy was demonically possessed. Exorcism featuring Hot Priest in 8x07

[balrogballs]

I am feeling an intense craving to read a good ensemble fic about Arwen and Aragorn's wedding please let me know if there is one and if not someone needs to write it before I do because the literary-comedic potential of the setting is simply immense.

Like you have A&A obviously fulfilling their romantic destiny etc etc, but the ensemble! You could have Gimli and the dwarves running a mildly bitchy yet incredibly funny gambling ring! Elladan and Elrohir getting their hands on a caseful of edibles trying to re-enact the plot of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas! The twins linking up with Merry and Pippin and getting done for whatever is the Gondorian equivalent of accidental terrorism!

And of course, poor Elrond who apparently got the wrong memo and "accidentally" came dressed for a funeral! Bilbo also turning up confused as all hell and dressed in all black because it seems Elrond also told him it was a funeral! Elladan and Elrohir being commanded by the bride to distract their father so he doesn't start crying into the appetisers!

Legolas coming dressed in all white (canon!) on purpose just to fuck with the guests and telling everyone he's the bride! El-twins standing up during the "does anyone object to this union" bit and yelling out "INCEST! BARE FACED INCEST IN THE HOUSE OF ELROND!"

Arwen and Aragorn trying to take them to task for it before they point out that it did manage to distract their father, who was no longer crying into the appetisers and instead making the rounds explaining to every single guest that it wasn't incest, that to call it incest would be like punching a monkey and calling it kinslaying, and that he was looking for mortal brides for his sons so please let him know if they know of any eligible ladies with a limited lifespan.

A TREASURE TROVE of opportunities I swear pls mine this cave and give me the big fat elven wedding I deserve to read about!

[baybelletrist]

YAY I’m crying and in actual pain!

I saw a post saying that Boromir looked too scruffy in FotR for a Captain of Gondor, and I tried to move on, but I’m hyperfixating. Has anyone ever solo backpacked? I have. By the end, not only did I look like shit, but by day two I was talking to myself. On another occasion I did fourteen days’ backcountry as the lone woman in a group of twelve men, no showers, no deodorant, and brother, by the end of that we were all EXTREMELY feral. You think we looked like heirs to the throne of anywhere? We were thirteen wolverines in ripstop.

My boy Boromir? Spent FOUR MONTHS in the wilderness! Alone! No roads! High floods! His horse died! I’m amazed he showed up to Imladris wearing clothes, let alone with a decent haircut. I’m fully convinced that he left Gondor looking like Richard Sharpe being presented to the Prince Regent in 1813

*electric guitar riff*

And then rocked up to Imladris a hundred ten days later like

[buckevantommy]

buck, in his biggest softest most muted-tone hoodie with days of scruff while baking sweet comfort treats: of COURSE i'm depressed!!! the love of my life just dumped me i'm a MESS!!! SOMEBODY TELL ME THEY LOVE ME!! :'( :'( :'( :'(

tommy, seemingly unaffected: i am not now nor have i ever been not fine. i do not even know what that is. i have been knot fine, sure. i have been fined, true. anyway, unrelated but i may be going into cardiac arrest...

[loveriotss]

imma need more tsukishima texts please. NO RUSH THO AT ALL take ur time 🙏

FAKE IDGAFER ⸻ kei tsukishima

INCLUDES — gn! reader, smau, fluff, crack, reader is one of karasuno's team managers WARNINGS — swearing

READ PART ONE HERE

main masterlist ༊*·˚ — haikyuu masterlist ༊*·˚

NOTE — very late im sorry it was hard thinking of what to put 😓😓. been busy these days but trust im gonna stop procrastinating and lock in 🙏.

©loveriotss — all rights reserved to me. don’t try to copy/steal my work. do not use any of my ideas/translate my work without my permission.

[maarkloee]

{random messages with markie}

[art-deco-shrimp]

Shen Yuan getting Miku to read PIDW aloud to him send tweet

there are pieces of svsss fanon that are very dear to my heart — such as curly haired binghe and disabled shen yuan — but one very silly piece that I adore is "Shen Yuan was really into Hatsune Miku" because !! there is literally nothing !! NOTHING !! that implies of this in canon. this is pure fanon!! and yet it feels so right? the duality of Peerless Cucumber, stallion novel anti-fan and Hatsune Miku enthusiast.

[o3o-lapd-o3o]

(part ???? of this ongoing thread/universe/au?)

(buckle yourselves in this is a long one!) (will be two parts as my brain wouldn't stop coming up with more nonsense as per usual)

*not long after telemachus met his dad's enemy 'friend', the god of the seas poseidon, for the first time*

*poseidon has fled (gods don't flee they briskly walk away) left to go back to the sea*

*odysseus, penelope & telemachus are having dinner*

telemachus: *smiling while retelling the meeting to penelope* -and he was so nice! father is so lucky to have him as his friend-

odysseus: *slightly chokes on his food at poseidon still being referred to as his friend*

telemachus: *looks at odysseus* -father are you ok?

penelope: *who knows odysseus' real relationship with poseidon*

penelope: *hasn't had much entertainment in 20 years*

penelope: *wants to stir the pot some more* ignore your father my dear, please continue telling me all about his friend

odysseus: *looking at penelope*

odysseus: *under his breath* penelope why?

*dinner continues with poseidon being the subject much to odysseus' dismay*

telemachus: *enjoying the family dinner*

telemachus: *gasps*

odysseus & penelope: ???

telemachus: we should have a big family dinner! father you can invite lord poseidon! i'll invite athena!

telemachus: *happy with himself for thinking of such an idea*

odysseus: *doesn't want to shoot down his son's idea, but also DOES NOT WANT TO SPEND ANY MORE TIME WITH POSEIDON*

odysseus: *scrambling for an excuse* son, he's a god and surely is very busy an-

penelope: *with a devilish grin* -and i'm sure will make time for his friend! what a wonderful idea telemachus! i'll let the palace cooks know!

penelope: off you go dear husband~ go and let your friend know~

odysseus: it's evenin-

penelope: first thing tomorrow then!

odysseus: *sighs in resignment* yes my love

telemachus: great! i can't wait to tell athena-

*athena appearing out of nowhere*

athena: i heard my name and came.

odysseus: athena?!

telemachus: athena!!

penelope: oh lady athena!

athena: *smiling whilst looking at telemachus* what would you like to ask me telemachus?

telemachus: oh yeah! we're going to have a big family dinner! father just needs to invite his god friend-

athena: *confused as she's odysseus' god friend* but i-

odysseus: *panicked* wait-

telemachus: -lord poseidon!

athena: *wide-eyed in shock*

athena: *slow blinking* did you say odysseus' friend is p-po- my uncle?!

telemachus: *nods and smiles* yeah, i thought you knew!

odysseus: *wondering how he'll explain this whole situation to athena*

odysseus: *under his breath* well now she knows...

penelope: *laughs to herself*

(to be continued!)

(okay i know i said in the reply to the ask i'd post the dinner scene, but my brain wouldn't stop throwing stuff for me to add in the run up to dinner. so there WILL be the dinner scene, but that will be in another post... tomorrow? -depending on how my work day goes-)

[robylovi]

tiny comic based off a scene I found hilarious from Boyfriend Material by winterkeep

[luvismenu]

STARBOY — Jeon Jungkook // series ✧

m.list ,, navi ,, about taglist !coming soon¡

summary: everyone assumes you two can't stand each other, but is that really true?

genre:

smau + written

crack + fluff

rivals/enemies to lovers

pairing: popular classmate!jungkook x class president!reader

warnings: uni au, explicit language, mentions of sexual activities,, that's pretty much it lmao it's mostly silly (may include smut if i actually feel like it in the future)

index —

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© 2024 luvi. All rights reserved.

[runraerun]

don’t worry, @queenofships06, Eddie’s got his guitar for enrichment!🎸♥️☺️

All my talk of needing to put Billy in a mason jar so I can study him/keep him close/shake the shit out of him on occasion and I finally did it:

Don’t worry guys, he’s happy and healthy. I even put some enrichment in there for him. ☺️❤️

[balrogballs]

i'm a writer irl (can't say who because my agent would rightfully put me into a blender and press the button if i go and out myself as "balrogballs") and honestly the funniest and most humiliating incident of my life was the time my finished manuscript triggered a plagiarism flag with the publisher for two lines of prose in my literary fiction novel...

.... which was word for word similar to a paragraph in a certain explicit work on FFN starring elrond and his batsman from the hobbit films, aka that one elf that looked like he ate panic attacks for breakfast (i forget his name but it's Figwit II) where the lord of imladris bends said twink over his writing desk and gives him the battering ram treatment.

and if you think i had to sit in front of one if the biggest publishing companies in the world and admit that it was, in fact, me who wrote the fic where the lord of imladris bends said twink over his writing desk and gives him the battering ram treatment in order to avoid being wrongly flagged for plagiarism, you would be absolutely correct.

(yes they published the book)

[cheeseanonioncrisps]

An adaptation of Sherlock Holmes set in a world in which the fictional character/literary juggernaut Sherlock Holmes, and all the subsequent adaptations thereof, still exist.

Sherlock Holmes (pronounced Holl-mess, as he is constantly reminding people) just had the misfortune of having parents who really liked the books, and his attitude towards his fictional counterpart is pretty much the same as that of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.

Sherlock runs a Youtube Theory channel called Mysteries Unwrapped with Sherlock Holmes. He has received no less than seven cease and desist letters from the Conan Doyle estate, all of which he has so faded managed to rebuff by pointing out that that's literally his name.

(No he won't change his name. He's Sherlock Holmes the real live human person. Let Sherlock Holmes the non existent fictional character change his name.)

John is Sherlock's flatmate. Sherlock almost refused to live with him once he realised that it would mean staying with a medical student named John, and only gave in once John pointed out that: a) he's a biomedical student, which is completely different from an md, and b) his surname isn't Watson.

It's now been three years, which is long enough for them to have developed a genuine friendship, and for John to have a) started working towards his PhD in biotechnology, and b) for him to start dating somebody with the surname Watson.

Sherlock can feel the narrative closing in.

His Youtube channel is meant to be focused on lost media, fan theories and stuff like that, but he keeps accidentally stumbling upon and then solving genuine crimes.

His brother Mycroft may or may not have chosen that name after he transitions specifically to annoy him.

He doesn't even live in London, but somehow the only flat they could afford was on a street named fucking Baker Street.

Sherlock Holmes and the Unescapable Power of the Narrative.