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kimberly-spirits13 · 2 years ago

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How the Batfam Reacts to Dick and Jason Dating a Black Widow HC

Dick:

• He met you on a mission where you were partnered together

• Dick immediately recognized the emblem on your suit showing that you were a Widow

• He was suspicious at first thinking that you were still with the organization until he heard you talking about it

• “Dreykov stood no chance against the freed widows.” He heard you explaining to Wonder Woman, “I hope that they’re doing well on Themyscira”

• He knew that if you were in cahoots with Diana, you must be sound

• When you were on the mission, you started talking a lot

• You thought he was funny and charming and he thought you were smart and witty

• Dick liked that you could handle yourself in situations and that you had grown from everything that had happened to you, not crumble from it

• When the mission was over, you two exchanged numbers

• One day, a few months later, you texted him and said that you were looking to move to Gotham

• You wanted to know if he’d go look at apartments with you since he knew Gotham better

• He was so excited and despite him trying to play it cool, everyone knew that he was up to something

• He made the excuse that Wally was doing some apartment shopping and wanted to hang out that week

• Let’s be honest, when you find your apartment you probably hook up or have a Disney binge night

• After a wild weekend, he heads back to the manor and is glowing

• Always on his phone

• Is in a good mood

• Sneaks off during patrol

• The works

• Everyone knew that he must be dating someone, it was so obvious

• When everyone finally finds out that he’s dating a Widow, it’s because they follow him to your apartment

• He’s there to work on some detective stuff that was going around in Gotham

• You had your monitors set up and your suit laying over the sofa when Tim, Jason, and Steph broke in through the window

• You pushed Dick behind the coach, rolling to take cover while you drew a Glock that was tucked in your waistband

• “Stand still, hands where I can see them!”

• “Y/N/N, those are my siblings!” Dick said tackling you, “idiot siblings at that”

• “You’re dating a Widow?!” While Jason still had his helmet on, his sense of surprise was evident

• “You’re dating a Widow and you called her by a nickname?” Steph gawked, “Never in all my days-“

• “You guys can’t tell Bruce!” Dick said frantically, “Tim don’t you dare touch that com”

• “Too late.” Damian came into the apartment, giving it a once over and glaring at you, “So this is the distraction that has been plaguing Grayson.” “Is he paying you to court him?”

• Bruce came into the apartment later to haul his kids out after they had basically interrogated you about life and how you and Dick were dating

• Bruce was suspicious of you at first, as he is, but after a few weeks, you were invited to patrol with everyone

• You and Jason trauma bonded and shot guns together

• Cass and Damian liked you since you were an assassin, and a skilled one at that

• Steph liked you cause you were pretty and badass

• Babs and Timmy thought you were intelligent and a good friend to have

• Bruce and Alfred eventually come around, Bruce likes that you’re loyal and intelligent

• Alfred likes that you’re not a crazy clout chaser

• Everyone adjusts really well to you quickly, and you easily become part of the family

Jason:

• You two met while you were rehabilitating on Themyscira with Diana as your mentor

• You and Artemis had quickly become friends and she had you come with her on a mission

• You needed something at a faster pace that you could exercise your skills with

• Artemis introduced you to Jason and you two hit it off quickly

• She noticed this and had you two paired up for a mission

• She’s not Artemis anymore y’all, she’s Cupid/ Eros and she just shot Jason Todd in the butt with an arrow

• He’s so gushy over you

• Puppy dog eyes and everything

• At first he’s like, it’s got to be the Russian accent

• But after a few hours, he knew it definitely wasn’t the accent

• When you’re still living at Themyscira, he asks Artemis to take you on as many missions as possible so that he can see you

• When you’re finally done living on the island, he’s the first to offer a new place

• Wants you to live at once of his safe houses in Gotham

• You would accept the offer but you already had gotten an apartment

• Jason was so depressed about it until you told him that it was in Gotham

• “What- you’re like my only friend. I’m not moving to LA or something.” You told him

• He was just puppy eyes and gushy

• Everyone saw a change in his demeanor and they were suspicious of what was going on

• Steph and Dick followed him one night to your apartment where they saw you in your widow suit and him in his red hood suit eating messy burgers and fries

• His boots and helmet were strewn about on the floor and weapons were littering the kitchen table

• He probably has his head in your lap at one point for you to string your fingers through your hair

• They’re both excited and rush back to the cave to spill the beans

• A few days later Dick tells Jason that he should invite his new gf over

• “You dickhead how’d you know about that! We’re you stalking me?”

• Maybe Dick was

• When you showed up to the manor, Damian immediately challenged you to a sparing duel

• Everyone but Jason was hesitant and when you landed the kid on his butt he was beaming with joy

• That’s when you earned Cass and Tim’s respect

• Damian liked you now too, but he wasn’t going to admit it after that beat down

• Bruce got to know more about you mainly from Diana

• Since he trusted her, it was easier to not be so suspicious about you

• Alfred liked you since you brought out the good in Jason and you were good help when he needed it

• The entire family ends up liking you really quickly, but you have to start setting boundaries about them coming and crashing in your place at some ungodly hour of the night

• Sometimes, the last thing you want to see at 4am is Dick Grayson sprawled out on the coach with his dogs out

• Jason is always welcome though

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garpen · 6 months ago

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Question for the twitter au or if you just want to give your thoughts!! What would the batfam &co compete in the olympics/ what would be their favorite event to watch? Loving your twitter au so much, hope you have a great day xx

Hello, anon...

This will not be in my au, but I will answer.

First however, I hope you know how you have cursed my brain. I read this ask not too long after you sent it, and it has been haunting me ever since. I hope your pillow is warm tonight as you sleep.

I kid, I kid. I actually love this ask, it seriously hasn't left my head since I saw it. So here you go:

Bruce: Weightlifting, and Diving

Kate: Triathalon

Luke: Boxing (on the nose, I know)

Barbara: Rowing (with accommodations, she can row and show off her badass strength!)

Dick: Artistic Gymnastics (on the nose, I know), and Beach Volleyball

Jason: Shooting (on the nose I know), and Table tennis

Cass: Figure Skating, Rhythmic gymnastics, and Breaking (she's such a badass she'd go so hard on all of these)

Steph: Equestrian (idk why she gives me horse girl vibes), and Surfing

Tim: Skating (on the nose, I know)

Duke: Sport Climbing, and Roller Speed Skating

Damian: Modern Pentathlon (bc he's extra)

And the reason this ask has been haunting me is bc for whatever reason my brain has decided I need to draw these things now...

Here's Bruce weightlifting!

This is the only digital drawing I've done so far. I have 5 paper sketches done and will be making them digital hopefully soon. 21 more to go after that!

Please keep in mind I like drawing but am no artist lol. I also have no stylus and draw with my finger so these will be coming in slowly bc ow

Thank you again for the ask! I loved this one sm!

#dc #batman #gotham #batfam #batfamily #dcu #bruce wayne #batfam in the olympics #jason todd #dick grayson #tim drake #luke fox #kate kane #barbara gordon #cassandra cain #stephanie brown #duke thomas #damian wayne

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snakeredbirdbatkatana · 3 months ago

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Soooooooooo I'm gonna rant just a bit.

I love Dick Grayson he is the most badass of birds, the OG he is fucking Nightwing.

Now I love happy family ok I do but we need perspective here people if you are gonna have Dick pick sides or put other people in front I need you to read a comic cause this is what people seem to think about Dick and it's driving me batshit. (Pun Intended)

That Dick would choose Jason, Stephanie, and Cass, over Tim and Damian.

Loud very Loud Deafning Buzzer noise.

That is incorrect.

Do not pass Go! Do not collect two hundred!

If Dick decided it was Fuck the Bats O'Clock he is not taking Stephanie and poor little Jason and leaving Tim or Damain out to dry. He would never choose Cass over Tim. Just like Tim would never take Cass over Dick.

If you want to have Dick leave the bats or some other shit he decides to take a vacation he would not refuse to tell Damian and instead tell Stephanie Brown. What no what where did this come from.

He would not ignore Tim's phone call but always answer Jason's.

He would answer Tim or Damain no matter how annoying those two are.

He would not tell Tim to be nice to Jason cause he's a sad wet cat.

He would not rather hang out with Stephanie Brown over Damian.

He would not get in TimSteph's drama and than berate Tim.

It's like we forgot the plot of the movie.

You want to have Dick be this perfect big brother figure that ok I love that but don't be having him pick other people over his people.

Tim is Dick Grayson's little Brother Tim loves Dick he is Nightwing's number one fan.

Number 2 is Damain Wayne.

Damian is Dick's Brother sometimes even practically his kid.

Just like Bruce is not picking Jason over Dick.

Dick is the winner for everything everyone would not kick him off the island but he would Kick everyone off the island for Tim and Damian.

So in conclusion Dick loves Tim and Damian he also loves Jason but if Jason is gonna attempt to kill Damian or Tim. Well he killed a man who used to call himself the Red Hood once.

He also likes Stephanie Brown but she's not his bestie they aren't leaving Damian and Tim so they can go hang out or whatever.

If you want to write that go for it but don't you dare say that's cannon. Dick Grayson has put up with way to much bullshit caused by those two for this slander.

I love Jason he's one of my favs I also love Stephanie I am absolutely in love with Cass they are all awesome but they aren't the Dick Grayson Fan club founders.

#tim drake #batfamily #dick grayson #damian wayne #Dick Damian and Tim are a trio that is unstoppable #Bruce is terrified of them #jason todd #bruce wayne #batfam #batman #dc #stephanie brown #cassandra wayne #fandom criticism

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batfambrainrotbeloved · 3 months ago

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Hey, just wondering if you could give us some insight into how the sleepy kitten cafe staff met Alan/got close to him/what they think of him. Also curious to see what all the bats think about cardinal. Did they ever meet in costume?

P.S: Keep up the good work!!

Of course!! I touched a little bit in "Jerry the Raccoon" but that was mostly Tim & Zeek (and it was not my best chapter- but I refuse to edit it for my own sanity)

Also so far? No. Cardinal manages to maintain a distance 24/7 with bats (almost as if hes tracking them during patrol- wild right??) But overall

Bruce is tearing his hair out, but admits they are useful and more effort than they're worth.

Babs adores them, and is on a mission to find them out and take them under her wing

Dick finds Bruce plight funny- but is kinda unnerved how similar Cardinal is to a talon in some ways. (also just creepy in general)

Jason "Game recognizes game" but wishes Cardinal would stop running so he could ask him more questions

Cass never gets close. But not bothered by them.

Steph thinks Cardinal is badass but keeps her distance, doesnt trust the vibes

Damien acts like he doesn't care about Cardinal (He so does, hes obsessed- lowkey fanboy behavior)

Alfred thinks its nice Bruce has someone else willing to deal with Gotham, who ISN'T under his nagging control. Theres some respect there.

NOW Sleepy Kitten fam backstory (as of rn, subject to change as lore provides)

Well Alan Draper (Originally Alvin) was a normal civillian persona Tim had- but in order to MAKE a persona, people need to know you. Otherwise it takes a quick asking around to realize you aren't who you say you are.

So when Tim was Fifteen or so Alan "moved to Gotham" from Chicago and started taking classes at Gotham University. He started showing up at the cafe out of pure convinence before Obi and Gwen worked there (officially)

Obi's dad had a run in with a rouge, got injured, and couldn't work both shifts. So they turned to part time student and began running the store. They'd gotten used to Alan hanging around and they talked on ocassion but mostly enjoyed silence when the other was working. Slowly but surely Tim grew to love being Alan- one of the few times he could be stress free anymore and yet not be so alone. And Obi dealing with the stress of taking over family buisness had one customer whose ever presence was comforting.

A few months pass and they consider each other pretty close friends to the point Alan had a spare key to the cafe in case of emergencies. Soon after some of the other staff quit and Obi opened applications- Gwen showed up, nervous as hell having never worked a day in her life and already applying to like ten other positions.

But Obi was desperate and soon enough Gwen was at the cafe just about every hour of the day and night. It got to the point where she would hang out even after her shift.

Then by pure forced proximity, Alan grew to love her company just as much as Obi- though in a way that forced him out of his shell just a bit.

It was clockwork of Alan, Gwen, and Obi all at the Sleepy Kitten on random day hours chatting away while working.

Events of the chapter transpire, with Alan showing up with this guy who 100% belongs in a gang, but Obi takes "minding their own buisness" HARD and trusts both Alan and Gwens opinions (Gwen who just saw sad guy and forced to help)

Now Obi has basically permenantly taken over the cafe, but still takes some art school classes on the side with some of the profits that don't go back into the cafe.

Gwen and Zeek have an apartment together in the far narrows since Gwen was desperate to move out, and Zeek was company and free security, who also needed a place. Apartment is just a block or so from the cafe too

Alan lives outside downtown but commutes often, works odd hours but whenever he is free, will set up in the cafe and enjoy the peace for a bit with his friends.

Long story short- they were coworker friends, except Alan refused to take a job literally ever.

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hanihazeljade · 11 months ago

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Three Weeks

As the snow fell into the streets of Gotham, covering her land with white sheet, he stepped out of the plane. He shivers. He missed the deadly coldness of his hometown. The pollution never seemed to change back when he left 7 years ago. He sighed, white mist blowing out of his mouth. He will only need to stay here for three weeks. Three weeks and he will go back to Japan.

After many years of being away to his adopted family, Tim comes back to Gotham for Cassandra and Stephanie's wedding.

(CW: flashbacks, negligence, swear words, a badass Timothy)

Next Part - Three Idiots

Part Three - Three Hopes

Tim looks outside of the bus. His eyes watch the streets of Gotham. Christmas lights are on as it was 5 days away from Christmas. He watched and watched, like he always did, as classical music blasted to his airpods until the bus hit the stop to Bristol.

In all honesty, he could ask Alfred to fetch him but the man is now too fragile to his liking to be doing him favours. He rather takes the 40 minute walk from the station to Wayne Manor. He doesn’t mind the cold, he actually prefers to be freezing every single moment of his life. He doesn’t want to be reminded of the burning desert in Iraq.

With his suitcase on his tow, he started walking to the peaceful street of Bristol. The snow gently falls into his face and quickly melts but some falls into his lashes and brows and he couldn’t bring himself to wipe it off. He likes the small blur on his sight, it shows that he doesn’t have to stay vigilant in this city. Twenty minutes into the walk, he saw the Drake Manor, still in its pristine shape, hopefully. He walked as he tried to look past the gates of the once house of his, snow is piling up but he will be visiting it once he gets his stuff unpacked.

As he starts to get closer and closer to the Wayne Manor, nostalgia hits him. The good memories flood his mind. Bruce giving them a small pat or rarely hugs, Dick trying to spoil all of his siblings, Cass putting glitter bombs to the most unique places together with Stephanie, Jason joking his death again and again, Damian giving them Alfred the Cat as a stress reliever, and Alfred giving them hot cocoa on the worst days and cookies on the best.

But obviously, if it's all just good memories, he will not leave Gotham. The bad to the worst memories starts to resurface. The threat of Arkham, the throat-slitting episode, the pushing to his death story, the I choose to follow Batman rather than to be honest with you thing, the hellish training with Lady Shiva and many more that he couldn’t remember. He shook his head to remove those memories. It’s been more than a decade since that happened and he has healed already. No need to reopen old wounds.

His time in Japan definitely made him more aware that he doesn’t need other people to love him. He can just do it himself. He starts to sleep for more than 6 hours a night. He eats three times a day, sometimes with a balanced diet, sometimes just pure sodium for ramen or just straight up scooping Nutella out of the jar. He now prioritises himself over others. He works for himself and not to get approval from anyone. He is now him, just Tim. A simple Tim that loves to photograph and now be the object of his photographs.

Many things change over the course of time. He forgives the Waynes but he will never call himself one. Waynes never treats him like family, except for Cass, bless her pure heart, and he is now giving it back, the treatment of an acquaintance. Not family. Not friends. But acquaintances. That’s all the Waynes are to him now. Because god forbid that his teenage self is simply obsessed with them. He rolled his eyes on the thought.

As he was letting his thoughts wander, he finally arrived at the prestigious Wayne Manor. The gates are open so he let himself into the other five minute walk of the driveway. As he stared at the old oak wood door, he sighed, trying to compose himself as he will be in their presence for the next three weeks. After trying to console himself, he knocks hoping that it will be Alfred who will open the door for him. After a few minutes of waiting on the porch, the door opened, revealing the foyer of the Manor and Alfred standing in front of him.

“Hi, Alfred.” Tim smiled at the old man.

Alfred, still in shock but smiled back to him, “Welcome back, Master Tim.”

And then suddenly there is a commotion behind Alfred, making the two gentlemen on the doorway look. It shows Damian and Jason. Seems like the two are trying to race to see which one will get to the door first. Childish competitions, like what brothers do. Jason and Damian look at them, first to Alfred and next to Tim. And he looked back at them, giving them a gentle smile.

“Hi, Timmerly. You look different.” Jason spoke out of the blue.

“Thank you, Jason.” He said, “You look different, too.” he added. Jason has indeed changed. The white stripe of hair due to the dip is still there but the face and the body itself evolved. Jason looked taller than he last saw him, The tight wool sweater emphasises the bulk body of Jason. And that face of his, is always exceptional but more relaxed.

There he heard a cough and gave his attention to the person. “Timothy, you look alright.” Damian said, standing in his glorious 6 foot 3. His tanned skin is honeyed perfection and his build is more similar to Bruce and Jason. Green eyes looked at him like it was captivating his soul. The Demon Brat is gone and was replaced by a hulking man.

He was shocked for a fleeting second before replying, “Thank you, Damian.”

“Young Masters, as much as I like that the three of you are conversing like normal human beings, Master Timothy needs to go inside first. It is freezing out there.” Alfred interrupts them and tells Jason and Damian that he is still indeed on the porch. Jason without waiting a moment, went and grabbed his suitcase and he proceeded to go inside the manor.

Tim asked Alfred, “Where will Jason put my suitcase?”

“In your room, Master Tim. I mean, your old room.”

“Oh.” He just said as he took off his scarf and coat and gave it to Alfred, as he left the three on the foyer.

He starts walking into the Manor and walks past the library with the rest that didn’t meet him on the door. Steph and Cass are cuddling each other on the couch while Bruce is on the loveseat fiddling something in the tablet, probably about Wayne Enterprise, and Dick is on one of the bean bags that is scattered in the library. The first one to notice him is Cass, of course.

“Little brother, welcome.” She said as she reached out one of her arms to him. Her acknowledgement of his presence makes everyone in the room aware of his existence.

“Timmy!” Dick shouted as went to him and hugged him. It kinda still startled him a little bit, but he awkwardly hugged Dick back.

Bruce gave him a smile, “Welcome back, Tim.”

Steph hit his back, “When Cass actually told us that you will come for our wedding, we didn’t believe her.“

Tim touched the spot Steph hit, “I would not miss it for the world.” Then he walked to Cass, “Hey, sis.” Cass smiled back at him. “Winter wedding, really?”

“Hey, winter weddings are beautiful. And Cass will look like an angel.”

“And you are the demon that made Cassandra fall down from heaven.” A voice joined them, it’s Damian.

“Hey! That’s mean!”

The chaos and noises are relatively relaxing but when he yawns, he excuses himself. “Going to sleep, Timmy?” He nodded and replied with, “Jetlagged.”

Tim tried to remember where his room was. And thank god, he found it with no anomalies. He entered the room and saw the room that he left. The room is completely gone with cans of energy drinks or packaging of junk foods. The bed is comforting as he remembers, he saw his suitcase next to the nightstand. He opens it and gets a fitted cashmere turtleneck and fleece sweatpants. He took a quick shower and changed. He laid down on the bed and let sleep take him.

He woke up the sun already down and darkness already took the city. He grabbed his phone and looked at what time it was. 8:05 am. Huh?? Oh, his phone is still in the Japanese Time Zone. He quickly changes it and freshens up. He looked at the wide mirror in his bathroom, and assessed himself. He knows he changed when he moved to Japan. His toned body was dissolved into a more lean one. His hair was maintained into a shoulder length, but his hair is shining with a red undertone in the right light. He has an ear piercing. His face was more round and yet still sharp. He got taller but still the smallest to Wayne, even Cass is taller than him. No, he is not salty about it.

He scooped up a handful of water and splashed his face and hair. Once he could feel his rationality and sanity came back to him, he dried his face and went down to the kitchen. He needs something to ingest in his body, anything. He saw Alfred was making something in the kitchen.

“Master Tim, you are finally awake. Will you please call the others for dinner?”

“Sure, Alfred.”

He found everyone in the largest living room. Damian and Dick playing chess, Damian is winning. Stephanie is doing something together with Duke. Bruce is with Cass flipping in the catalogue of whatever they still need to add to the wedding.

“Hey, Alfred told me to get you all. Dinner is ready.”

Dinner is rather peaceful, but rather uncomfortable. Whenever his eyes linger for a little second longer on a dish, Dick is already putting it on his plate. Damian kept on giving him a piece of whatever Damian thought he liked. Jason is spoon feeding him on dishes on what Jason thinks he will like. If this continues, he will be fat and as a model he would rather not have that. The Japanese Modelling World is so strict when it comes to thinness of their own.

But after that dinner, he sighed as walked to his room, he grabbed a velvet box and went to what he thinks is Cass' room.

He knocked, then he opened the door. Waynes are known for just busting your door open before coming in, because apparently, privacy is a social construct. Tim is not a Wayne anymore and also he is one of the decent people who actually knocks before coming inside of someone’s personal space.

“Hey Cass. I got you something.” he said as he looked at his sister.

“What is it?”

Instead of answering, he pulled a velvet box and gave it to Cass. Cass accepts it and opens the blue velvet box, revealing a silver hair comb pin. Cass looked at him with huge eyes. He smiled at his sister, “My mother wore that at her wedding. She says my grandmother and my great grandmother also wear that to their wedding, and I feel like I am not the rightful owner of such a piece.”

Cass hugged him. He missed how tight Cass hugs him. The comfortable warmth that brings pleasant memories only, none of those scorching heat of Iraq. Maybe, maybe he can stay here for three weeks for Cass. For Cass.

#fanfic #dcu #timothy jackson drake #damian wayne #jason todd #bruce wayne #tim drake #cass #steph #dick grayson

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brucewaynehater101 · 5 months ago

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I miss the feeling I had when I first joined this fandom, I knew virtually nothing so everything was correct and I loved everything, even if that stuff just isn’t true, i was like

Bruce is a bit emotionally constipated but loves his kids? Hell yeah sounds legit

dick is a silly happy flippy man who is a bit promiscuous? Love that for him

Jason is a mega feminist literature nerd who is also buff and takes care of the street kids? Perfect man honest

Tim is a nerd who never sleeps and is queer and has never known the touch of a man nor woman? Sweet

Steph is waffle obsessed goofball? Well I prefer pancakes but right on

Cass is a mute badass who loves her fam? I love her

Duke is a normal dude? Well someone has to be and he seems neat

Alfred can do no wrong? Aight, I love old perfect tea men

Damian is a little prick? So are all middle schoolers give him time

But then I had to go learn about the characters and now I have complex opinions about them, and can see the inherent racism and sexism in how they are portrayed

You know before I joined the bat fandom I did not use the exclude tag in ao3? Like tmnt and dp have some bad stuff but usually I could just scroll past.

but now I am having to avoid fics where whole ass adults are bullying and/or oversexulizing a child

Im constantly on the look out for untagged batcwst

I struggle to find fics that don’t describe dicks ass

I have been in this fandom for probably about two years now and y’all I swear

sorry for ranting, and don’t worry I love all your stuff and I know the just back click don’t leave mean comments rule

I’m just tried bc most of the stuff I thought was true turned out to be false

Mm. I do find it a little exhausting trying to navigate the lines of what's canon, what shouldn't be canon (but is due to racism/sexism/homophobia/etc.), and just having fun.

I'm also trying to cultivate the mindset of what I've seen on Tumblr about not policing other people's ships/ideas. I am highly uncomfortable with some (particularly underaged people and adults dating), but I'm also not leaving hate comments. Like you said, the backspace exists for a reason.

Idk. There's a toooon of takes/ideas about the batfam that are inherently false, but as long as they aren't racist/sexist/etc takes, I don't see the harm in them. So what if someone wants a coffee obsessed Tim? So what if Jason's kill code is very strict? As long as they don't claim it's canon, let them be

But yeah. I have a mile long exclude list for fics on AO3. I used to use it only for triggers (I can not do stockhold syndrome, my lords), but now it's got other weird ass shit I've stumbled upon (I saw a fic where the batkids were spanked as punishment??? Like I said, not gonna leave hate comments or single anyone out. Just not my cup of tea).

I also am usually not a fan of romance/sex. It's why the batfam intrigued me so much (found families usually don't have that in it). I like exploring dynamics outside of romance and thus love the batfam. They've got so much going on that romance/sex is not needed. They are such a mess without that dynamic being added (talking about the Bats getting with a third party, but, again, trying not to yuck anyone's yum).

However, I agree. There's a ton of misinformation within fandom. I like how complex canon gets with the characters, but there's also widely different takes with them (mostly talking about Bruce here. He can either be trying or just a straight up horrible dad).

#thank you for the ask!!!!#dc hcs

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fryingpan1234567 · 1 year ago

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canonically Jason and Tim have motorcycles, right? and B and Duke too but the other two are more well known I think

ANYWAYS what if everyone in the batfam had one tho? because. the potential.

Dick takes his off of roofs sometimes, but it’s built for it. before all his modifications, it was just a blue and black chrome Yamaha sports bike, nothing special. he added a Nightwing sticker on each side, a bunch of weapons (mostly electricity based), grappling hooks, Nightwing things. there’s even a sidecar for Haley.

Babs (before the wheelchair days) had a purple and yellow one that matched her suit perfectly. it sort of meant she couldn’t use it during the day, but occasionally she rode it to work with extensive concealing of the random dangerous gadgets. hers was also a Yamaha (same model ^^)

Jason canonically has a black shapeshifting one like some maccadams shit but it’s fine— it’s loud as shit, so he doesn’t really use it for patrol, but he loves it during the day. because it’s just black, it’s pretty easy to take it out for completely non-suspicious speeding law breaking joyrides. no harm done!

Cass has a jet black Ninja, and her reputation on the streets is about the same as the nightfury’s at the beginning of the first httyd. dark, deadly, and it’s even quiet in Gotham’s busy streets. watch your back for her.

Tim’s got the BATCYCLE it’s CANON. it’s also canon that it’s got a liquid-cooling engine and a Robin-themed paint job, but fuck that, I say it’s dark red and electric and he rides it to work. so sometimes (most of the time) he pulls up with ruffled clothes and helmet hair, which Conner nearly fainted at the first time he saw it, but we don’t talk about that. he doesn’t use it for patrol because Kon said he’d carry him everywhere if Tim gave him rides in exchange. on the bike. he has said on more than one occasion “wear the helmet, ride a biker” and Tim punches him really hard

Steph’s bike is purple, and the wheels do the hover-shift-glowy thing like in Mario Kart (also purple). she’s not scared of you or anyone; she will ride that shit to school and use it on patrol with the hovering and distracting color and everything. fight me.

in canon, Duke’s bike is electric with a bunch of lights and black and yellow and lowkey built like a tank. I kinda like it! I think it’s a fabulous bike for a fabulous man so therefore he gets to keep it I won’t be taking criticism

Damian gets a green and red and black electric Ninja, plus a helmet that he painted with feathers and paw prints n shit. Jon likes the spare, which is just black but has a red mohawk. what more could you want? he could fly everywhere, but he also could just have his badass motorcycle bf drive him everywhere while he wears his dope ass helmet and vibes to whatever 2000s pop shit Damian lets him play. he’s a professional backpack.

did you think I’d stop at the Batkids? sorry imma keep going

I like the idea of Brucie having a black sports bike that’s 90% modifications like in the movie. no one remembers what it was before he took it all apart and added Bat-stuff, but it looks great now! it’s blown up more times than you can count, just because it’s a really good target for rogues.

Kate has one that’s almost exactly the same, except hers is maybe a little closer to what it was originally. she doesn’t quite have all the same stuff Bruce does, but they’re the same vibe!

anyways that’s the vigilante weirdos club, so like it’s expected that they’d all have a dangerous vehicle. slightly less expected— Alfred freaking Pennyworth has a Harley with tall handles and sparkly black paint, but nobody knew that for such a long time because he barely leaves the manor. all the kids lost their minds when they found out. what can I say

anyways some Bat-bike shenanigans that have ensued:

street races between all the Batkids at least once a week, whether that be on patrol or in civvy clothes

Jason obnoxiously revving really loud whenever he sees one of them in the street, on a date, when he’s picking them up from something, just as often as possible. obnoxious revving. old people hate him

cool lesbian aunt Kate picking up kids from school with her badass bike and epic helmet

sometimes Dick will be talking about “his child” or “his baby” and no one’s sure if he’s talking about his dog or his bike

bike-related thirst traps on social media

“race you to the next light”

not a single one of them has left a Gotham speeding law intact even once (not even Alfred, although he won’t admit it)

Wally likes to get Dick to race him on his bike even though he knows he’s going to win

both Jon and Conner have said something along the lines of “I bet I could pick up the bike with you on it” as a show-off attempt, but Damian and Tim love their paint jobs too much to permit them to try

Batfam on bikes❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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mossfrg · 2 years ago

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Jersey Gotham pt 2

Small one for this part but I Could Not get this out of my head because it’s the funniest shit ever:

Fellow Gothamites/jersey people are like… 85% positive Batman is the Jersey Devil or some offshoot of that. There’s three “camps”— Batman is the Jersey Devil, Batman and Jersey Devil are same species, Batman and Jersey Devil were/are dating. For the first camp, people just think the JD moonlight as a vigilante cause the Pine Barrens get lonely and he wants to help people.

For the second group, it’s widely accepted that Jersey Devil is rural cryptid and Batman is urban cryptid and they stay out of each other’s ways. Tim, Duke, and Babs in paticukar love this theory and fuel the flames when in costume. (“oh Jersey Devil? No no they’re so chill, Bats has them over for dinner sometimes.”)

Jason, Dick, Cass and Steph fucking love the third group. They tease Bruce about it all the time. Dick has gotten him Jersey Devil sweatshirts so he can “flaunt his mans” (Bruce debated un-adopting after Steph joked that the kids should get to meet their stepfather). Jason goes as far as to implying that Batman and JD have ~history~ and the real reason Superman can never come to Gotham is because JD is jealous (“no fr B and JD were a thing for decades and then they got into a fight and B broke up and moved away and that’s how he met Superman, and then they started dating but JD still loves B so Supes can’t visit but B can’t go to Metro cause it’s too bright and he’d melt”). Cass just smiles sweetly and says Bruce has a type for murder-inclined criminal badasses. Damian doesn’t quite get the joke for a while and is horrified that Bruce is courting “that thing” and not Talía who “may murder but is at least human!” I just really want Bruce debating whether Batman/Jersey Devil or Batman/Bruce Wayne is worse.

Clark makes a comment about the whole Jersey Devil-Batman thing and it pisses Bruce off, and while still angry he’s at a party and gets a bit tipsy; he starts flirting with the official Jersey Devil Twitter account as Brucie Wayne. Fanart is made. “Brucie has two hands” trends for weeks. Alfred, completely straight faced at dinner, gives Bruce his blessing to be with JD, or Batman, “I fought in the war I won’t judge your lovers Master Bruce”

#batfam #richard grayson #bruce wayne #jason todd #tim drake #damian wayne #brucie wayne #gotham #make batfam jersey #brucie has two hands #jersey devil #cryptid batman #dc #cassandra cain #superbat #again super vague

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tumblingxelian · 7 months ago

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The "real" Batman

I see people complain about the emphasis some people put on Batmans more negative character traits a lot.

"That's not the real Batman, that's flanderiztion, fanon, a few bad but popular adaptions, the 90's only" and the like are common refrains and it really gets to me. Cos see, while I am aware no incarnation of Batman is totally one note, I emphasize the more negative sides of Batman for reasons that aren't "Edgy, badass, GRRR, Toxic masculinity woooh" bullshit and I hate being dismissed as such.

So, here's why I do it:

First is because of general frustration at the dismissal of any incarnation of Batman, regardless of popularity, or ongoing presence in the main-line comics and timelines, being invalid. IE, the "HE's not the real Batman so he doesn't count" when he canonically is, & as done stuff like that.

60s/80s Batman smiles after sending a purse snatcher away in an Ambulance, kidnaps & others relies on torture style interrogations. Just like 90s/2000's Batman threatens people with assault in prison & looms over a Mugger he slammed so hard into a wall it left a giant blood splatter.

It is fair to ague that brutality is not all of what he is, that's valid. But that side of him is not something I feel one can just handwaved away as "not canon" & people doing so frustrate me in large part because it feels intellectually dishonest. Its refusing to engage with a metric ton of the canonical lore of a character they are discussing.

Secondly is the fact that a lot of the lore, history, character development, derailment, treatment, tone, framing and more for characters OTHER than Batman relies on him having a history of problematic behavior.

Cassandra basically living in a Bat-Cave with no civilian life or identity because Bruce is giving her what HE wants for himself even though its bad for both of them is just an example of a huge part of their dynamic. One that can be deeply damaging, self destructive and messy, but also makes perfect sense given the characters involved.

How Jason's entire shift in character and framing was done largely to insulate Bruce from criticism over his death, IE, Jason being characterized post death as violent, arrogant, not particularly bright and then coming back as a villain also ties into 20 something years of smearing his name to protect Bruce's.

Stephanie's entire character history begins falling apart if Batman doesn't treat her like the trash he did in canonical mainline comics, and leaves her with only a couple of borderline cameos at best. Hell, even 'new' stuff where he's "nicer" still has him do things like fake therapy appointments to trick her.

Hell, even Dick in a lot of incarnations as well as mainline comics at different times has a lot of issues that came from being raised/trained by Bruce. No, it isn't universal, but it is far too common & recurring of an element to just say "doesn't count!" & declare the discussion over.

& the thing is, when people say they want the "Real" batman or the "Good" Batman, they not only erase these characters histories. They don't replace it with anything worthwhile for anyone but Bruce himself.

If ignoring all that meant replacing it with stuff like Jason never died & or never became Red Hood & is a totally different character. Or Cassandra and Bruce having arcs about their obsessions with vigilantism at the expense of their personal lives, or Stephanie actually getting to be ROBIN. Then it would be something at least somewhat interesting to engage with. But they don't, instead Jason still became a supervillain & is the Red Hood, Stephanie still got fired if she was Robin at all.

They are either forgotten (Cass & Steph) or end up being warped (Jason) so their characters history, everything is different and all to better serve making Bruce look good. I really find it vexing that even in "Batman is not a jerk" stuff, he still warps the narrative to everyone else's detriments.

#DC #Bruce Wayne #The Batman #Batman

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miryum · 7 months ago

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"The Red Arrow"

Summary: Detective!Jason Todd x detective!Reader based on Jake and Amy's relationship

Series Warnings: Swearing, descriptions of violence (but nothing descriptive), guns and other police stuff

Series Masterlist

Mp/n: mispronounced name W/n: wrong name N/n: nickname

I combined two episodes- just a heads up

Y/n stood next to Cass behind the two-way glass, carefully watching a redhead sitting in the interrogation room. Jason stood silently in the corner. The redhead was a burly man, feet thrown up on the metal table, causally singing. “What’s going on?” Y/n scrunched her nose.

“Picked him up on more than a dozen counts of identity theft,” Cass said. “His name is Roy Harper. Ever seen him?”

“Nope. Although, I will admit, he’s one of the hotter perps. Definitely smash.” Jason grunted at Y/n’s words.

From inside the interrogation room, Roy sang, “Cassandra…. Cassandra…. Caaaassandraaaaaa…. oooooh yeah….” Y/n snickered and Jason couldn’t hold back a smirk.

Ignoring Roy, Cass said, “he said he wanted to talk to a Mp/n or W/n L/n. Whatever.”

“Why would he want me? And, should I change my name to W/n L/n? Cause it sounds super badass.”

“He said he has some info about someone with arrows?” Cass shrugged.

“Arrows?” Y/n’s eyes widened. She muttered to herself, “he knows the Red Arrow.” She grabbed Cass by her shoulders and demanded, “listen to me. He specifically said he knows someone who uses arrows?”

“Yeah. I literally just said that.”

“Right, right, sorry.” A laugh bubbled out of Y/n. She practically ran into the interrogation room, Jason following on her heels. He wasn’t about to let her be alone with a criminal. Cass sighed and marched after them.

“So, I used to work in a pawn shop,” Roy explained after introductions. Y/n sat forward, hanging on to his every word. “Chill hours, absent boss, perfect place to snag jewels and stuff. Uh, not that I’ve ever done that,” he hurriedly added. Cass’ jaw twitched. “Anyway, this guy came in a lot, selling rubies.”

Y/n gasped. “Just like the Red Arrow!” she exclaimed.

“I mean, we called him Miguel, but whatever.” Roy shrugged.

“I’ve been chasing this guy for six years!” Y/n turned to look at Jason and Cass, explaining her passion for this random thief. “He always steals red rubies from high tech jewellery stores and spray paints a red arrow before he leaves, hence the name. He never left any evidence and he’s never been caught on camera. He’s a ghost!”

“Super ghost,” Roy whispered, eyes gleaming.

“Super ghost!” Y/n yelled out, agreeing.

“Before anything else happens, we need to know this guy’s legit,” Jason said. “Describe him.”

“Uh…” Roy hummed. “Mexican dude, maybe 5’8”? He has this pointy little beard and always wears a purple tie.”

“So would you say he looks sort of like,” Y/n whipped up a drawing of the man Roy was describing. “This?”

Roy winked. “There‘s that sexy motherfucker, Miguel.”

“This is a composite sketch from ten interviews I've done,” Y/n said in awe. “A perfect match.”

Cass wasn’t satisfied. “So all you know is what a bunch of other idiots have said over the years. Big whoop. Anything else?”

“Yeah.” Roy sat back and his teeth flashed as he grinned. “I know how to get in touch with him.”

Y/n gasped and emphasised, “Roy Harper!” Jason clicked his tongue, unimpressed.

“Ah, Brown. Just the woman I was looking for.” Captain Wayne stopped by Stephanie’s desk, looking down at her. “Clark has accepted an offer to teach at the University of Florence for the next six months.”

“Oh, I love Italy,” Steph said, still unsure as to why her Captain was telling her this.

“Clark and I belong to the Park Slope Racquet Club, where we've established a squash doubles dynasty.” Bruce explained, “we've taken home the trophy two years in a row. Unfortunately, he’ll be flying to Florence this year during the tournament. I remember you told me you played in college…” he trailed off and glanced at Steph hopefully.

“Three-time intramural champion at Sarah Lawrence,” Steph said proudly. “Would have been four, but senior year I played Lord Farquaad in our school's production of ‘Shrek.’”

Wayne hummed, unsure of how to respond. “In any case, I would be honoured if you would take Clark’s place so that I could still compete.”

Stephanie blanched, yet offered a thumbs up. “Absolutely! I would love to do that!”

“Fantastic,” Wayne said.

“Yup! That is great. This is great.” She slowly stood and manoeuvred over to Dick’s desk before collapsing in a seat next to him. “This is terrible.”

“Why? You’ve always said you wanted more quality time with Wayne.” Dick set down his pen.

“No, not like this,” Steph shook her head. “Squash brings out my competitive side. Breaking racquets, cursing, excessive use of the bird.” Her eyes widened in fear. “One time, just to psych a guy out, I locked eyes with him and ate a squash ball.”

“That's not possible.”

"I can still feel it rolling around in me, Dick.”

“Look, the point is to have fun,” he tried to reassure her. “So just relax and have fun.”

“Right, right, right, yeah. I mean, it's just a game. It's fun. There's no need for Wayne to see me unleash the beast.” She laughed nervously. “Okay.”

“The burner phone that Roy uses to contact the Red Arrow is at his house.” Y/n pressed her hands together and pointed at Captain Wayne, a hopeful look plastered on her face. “He's agreed to help us catch the Arrow if…. We drop all charges against him,” she said quickly, almost as she hoped her superior didn’t hear her.

Captain Wayne sat behind his desk, analysing his detectives. “How many rubies would you say this Red Arrow has stolen?”

“Fifty-eight, that I know of.” Y/n said, “but the real number could be in the thousands!”

Wayne squinted at Y/n. “You’re not very good at maths,” he stated. Turning to Cass, he asked, “what are the charges against Harper?”

“Thirteen counts of identity theft, but I’ve been chasing him for more than a month.”

“A month?” Y/n scoffed. “I’ve been chasing the Red Arrow for more than six years. Do you know how many months that is?”

“Seventy-two,” Wayne answered instantly.

Y/n pursed her lips and murmured, “Ten…? Five and seven… and four years… wait, months?”

“Do you need a maths tutor?” Captain Wayne asked. “Because the department will provide one.”

“I can’t tell if you’re being serious,” Y/n muttered.

“I’m on the fence,” Wayne admitted, returning to the matter at hand. “Cain, you caught him. It’s your call.”

“Cass,” Y/n turned to her friend, practically begging. “This guy is for real. One thousand pushups.”

Cass’ eyebrows shot up. “One thousand pushups? Alright. I’m in.” She shrugged.

“What’s one thousand pushups?” Bruce asked.

Y/n explained, “we were in the academy together and hated the drills. So now, when we're on a case, if one of us says one thousand pushups, it means ‘I'm so sure I'm right that if I'm wrong, I'll do one thousand pushups.’”

“It’s a pact we made,” Cass added. “It means ‘trust me.’ And I do,” she added with a smile.

Wayne nodded. “Make the deal.”

Y/n cheered, “yes! I’ve got you now, Red Arrow! Wow! It feels good to say that in front of actual people instead of the mirror. Okay! Let’s grab the burner, contact and catch the Arrow, and become police legends.”

Later, Roy stood in front of his house, flanked by Y/n and Cass, the latter in her signature leather jacket. “Babysitter’s car is here,” he said. “They’re home.”

“Babysitter?” Y/n scrunched her nose. “You have a kid?”

“Yeah,” Roy beamed. “Little girl called Lian. Can I take my cuffs off?”

“No,” Cass deadpanned.

“Lian doesn’t know I’m a criminal!” Roy protested. “She thinks I own a construction company.”

“Why stop there?” Y/n shrugged. “Tell her you’re an astronaut.”

“Nah, man,” Roy shook his head. “Space is scary. You saw what it did to Matt Damon. I don’t wanna staple my skin together.”

“You got a point.” Y/n shot Cass a look. “Come on, Cain.”

Cass huffed and rolled her eyes. “You can play-act with your daughter for three minutes until we get the burner. One false move and I tase you in front of your daughter,” she threatened.

“Geez, dude. Harsh,” Y/n sucked in a breath. She mouthed towards Roy, “Don’t worry, she loves me too much to do that.” Roy nodded back dramatically.

He unlocked the door and a small voice shouted out, “Daddy!” A tumbling mess of toddler came barreling down the hall and into Roy’s arms. Y/n cooed, heart melting. Roy grunted, picking Lian up and spinning her around.

“Hey, baby! How you doing?”

“Good! Lois and I were playing Veterinarian.”

“Ooh! Sounds fun. Where is Lois?” Roy looked around.

“Cleaning up!” A voice shouted from down the hall.

“Why aren’t you at work?” Lian asked. “And who are they?” She pointed at Y/n and Cass and Roy gently reminded her it’s rude to point.

“They’re my coworkers!” Roy snickered, “Cass is a director on my board of directors and Y/n is my financial planner.”

Y/n winced and hummed, “yes. Stocks and numbers. Money. Very important. Did you know that four twenty-five dollar bills equal a hundred dollar bill?” Cass simply sighed and rubbed her temples. “Speaking of which,” Y/n said, noting her friend’s expression, “we should find that phone. So we can get back to building… buildings.”

“Right, right.” Roy let Lian down and said, “it’s in the spare bedroom.”

“I’ll go with you,” Y/n volunteered. “Cass can stay here with Lian and Lois.” Cass glared at her, but agreed.

Roy led Y/n through the house, waving to Lois and asking about Lian’s day. The spare bedroom was filled to the brim with toys and stuffed animals from Lian and memorabilia from Roy’s younger days. Roy dug the out burner phone and presented it to Y/n who quickly typed out a message. “Back in the game,” she narrated. “When can we meet up?”

“Ooh, you’re good at this criminal thing,” Roy commented. “If you ever wanna quit your cop thing, I could use your intelligence.”

“Aw, thanks man. How long until he usually responds?”

“Like, ten minutes?” Roy shot her a look. “Chill, dude.”

“I can’t chill!” Y/n bounced up and down. “I've never been this close before.”

“I gotta admit, your enthusiasm makes me want you to catch him.”

Y/n placed a sincere hand to her heart. “Thank you.” She noticed a pile of DVDs in the corner. “You still have those?”

“Yeah. I robbed a store a couple years back and kept my favourites.”

Y/n crouched down and scanned the titles. “Goonies, Princess Bride… The Sandlot! Dude! You have the best taste in movies!”

“Gotta have the classics,” Roy said. “Yes, ma’am, the American stories of promise and inspiration.”

“Inconceivable,” Y/n muttered, grinning.

“I’m not sure that word means what you think it means,” Roy said in a stilted accent.

“Hey, you guuuuys!” They crowed together.

“Hurry up, Benny! My clothes are going outta style!” Roy quoted.

“They already are!” Y/n cried back, both giggling.

“Hey,” Cass stepped into the room. “You guys having fun?” Lian gripped onto the detective’s hand, smiling brightly. Cass’s eyes screamed, 'Cause I’m not. Her hair was decorated in braids and she looked as if she wanted to rip them out.

The phone suddenly chimed and Y/n practically dropped it trying to see the Red Arrow’s response. “Parking lot on Flatbush and Vanderbilt in 15 minutes. Let's go.”

“Wait, wait, wait.” Roy held up his hands. “Cain looks like a dirty criminal. But you,” he pointed accusingly at Y/n who still wore her GCPD jacket, “look like a cop, man. You can't go over there like that.”

Y/n raised an eyebrow. “...What'd you have in mind?”

A couple minutes later, Y/n stepped out of Roy’s house wearing a striped shirt and jeans with a white suit buttoned in the middle, sleeves rolled up. Y/n giggled, a moment away from breaking out into laughter. “I don't look like a cop now.”

“No, you look like Backstreet Boys meets Jonas Brothers,” Cass said.

Roy laughed, “Burn!”

Y/n shook her head, “Nah, that's not a burn, that's cool.” As they walked to the parking lot, she commented, “Not gonna lie, the suit is kinda growing on me.”

Cass grunted, glaring out the parking lot. “There’s no one here. L/n…”

“A thousand pushups,” Y/n said softly. Cass took a slow, deep breath and nodded once.

“Incoming,” Roy hissed, eyebrows up and hands in pockets. “Who the hell are you?” he cried to the man walking towards them, very clearly not Miguel. “Where's Miguel?” Y/n frowned and eyed Cass.

“He hadn't heard from you in a while, so he sent me to make sure everything was cool,” the man said, shrugging.

“Apparently it's not,” Y/n muttered, kicking the pebbles at her feet. She had been so close.

“Who are they?” The man nodded to Y/n and Cass, glaring.

“They're with me,” Roy said. “This is the buyer. Rosa Santiago.” He gestured towards Y/n.

The man shook his head. “I don't know ‘em, I don't trust ‘em.” He stated his terms, “He meets with you alone or it's off. I'll text the address.”

The man walked away, not giving them another option. Once he was out of earshot, Y/n groaned, “Come on! I promise you this: they have not heard the last of Rosa Santiago!” She shook her fist at the back of the retreating man. She pivoted to face Roy and Cass and announced, “Okay, it's worth the risk. We send him in alone.”

Cass argued, “no, we don’t! Something doesn't smell right to me.”

Roy shrugged. “Could be my dad's suit. He died in it.”

Y/n’s eyes widened. “He died in it?! Wait… this is a man’s suit? Why does it fit me so well…?”

Roy’s burner phone pinged and he said, “they just sent the location.” He studied his phone and exhaled loudly. “Man, this dude is cautious. If I show up one minute late or I'm not alone, he is done with me.” He pursed his lips and said to Y/n, “this is your last shot.”

Y/n shook her head and picked at her skin. “I can't let the Red Arrow get away.” After a moment of contemplating, she decided, “put a wire on him, get a tactical team in as backup.” She begged Cass, “please, it's the only way.” When the older detective didn’t look impressed, Y/n tried to convince her. “Harper and I know this guy. You have to trust us.”

Cain scoffed. “Do I? One of you is a criminal, and the other one is dressed like a knockoff of fucking Steve Harvey.” She poked her tongue in her cheek and decreed, “it's over. I'm ending this now.” She sighed. “Sorry, Y/n. Truly, I am.”

Y/n stared at her and couldn’t help but cross her arms. ”Seriously, Cain?”

“Yeah.” She repeated the words Y/n had promised earlier, “one thousand pushups.”

Y/n’s chin jutted up. “Well, I raise you. Two thousand pushups.”

“What?” Cass frowned. “That's not how this works. I said "one thousand pushups.” You have to back me up, L/n. That's the pact; end of story.”

“Well, I break the pact,” Y/n said abruptly. “Cass, I hope you understand how serious this is to me.” She whined in a deep voice, “Can't you read between the lines, man?”

“Don't quote Die Hard.”

“Sorry. But we're still sending him in alone.”

Captain Wayne wore shorts and a t-shirt, something Steph was still getting used to seeing. She, however, was on the sidelines, fiddling with her racquet. “You ready, Brown? Psyched up?”

“No, why?” she asked. “Do I seem psyched? 'Cause I'm definitely not. I- I just want to have fun!” She ran a hand through her hair.

“And to win,” Wayne reminded her slowly.

“Hey hey hey!” Steph shrugged dramatically, pulling at her shirt. “If we all have fun and don't throw any racquets and don't eat squash balls, then we're all winners.”

“What?!”

“Nothing. I'll serve.”

The game started with Stephanie serving and after a couple hits, their opponent called, “out.”

“What?” Steph shouted. “Are you out of your goddamn mind?” Then, as if a switch flipped in her head, she gave a high-pitched chuckle and gritted her teeth. “That was... fun. That was a fun call. You're a real fun guy, fun guy. This is fun! This is fun! Right?” Her knuckles turned white on her racquet.

Y/n prepped Roy Harper in the back of a police van. “We need evidence, so get him talking,” she encouraged him. “Ask questions about money, jewels, specifics.”

Roy clenched his jaw and shook his head. “I'm getting kind of nervous, man. This dude is for real. You sure you have everything covered?”

“Yeah. There's a guy on the back door, eyes on the side door, and two dudes on the corner. You'll be fine.”

“What about choppers?” Roy asked. “Do you have access to choppers? With snipers and rockets and shit?”

“No one has rocket choppers,” Cain deadpanned.

“Although that does sound amazing,” Y/n added, eyes lighting up with the possibilities.

“We got eyes on the Arrow.” A voice announced through a walkie talkie. “He's a block and a half away.”

“You ready?” Y/n asked Roy.

Roy nodded. “You and me, N/n. We were born ready.”

“Yeah! Go, Roy, go! You got this! Show me your game face! Whoo!” Y/n hyped him up as he exited the van, clapping him on the shoulders. Once the doors had closed behind Roy, she turned to Cass and stage-whispered, “his game face makes him look constipated.”

Y/n leaned over the audio transmitter and muttered, “we meet at last, Red Arrow. For six years I've tracked you. And today I'm taking you down.” She said into the microphone, “Roy Harper, can you hear me? Say something to test the wire.”

“Hey, Cain, after we put the cuffs on this guy,” Roy waggled his eyebrows. “I'll be free for dinner. And I’m sure Lian would love another playmate. What do you say?”

“The mic works,” is all Cass said.

“Miguel! What's up?”

Roy called out and another voice filtered through. “It’s a pleasure to see you again.”

Roy rambled, “let's talk about jewels. I’m working at the shop again. I can deal with anything you want. Red jewels, blue jewels, one jewel, two jewels. Jewels are really great, aren't they? Real pretty.”

“What is he doing?” Cain asked in disbelief.

“Talking about jewels,” Y/n said as if it was obvious.

“You know what else is great about jewels?” Roy continued, “The way they look. They’re just so pretty.”

Cass shook her head. “That's it. I'm calling it.”

“No!” Y/n shrieked.

“Move, people, we're going in now.” She banged open the door and the other officers ran onto the scene. “On your knees! Hands on your head!” In the basement where the deal was going down, they surrounded a man who was Mexican, maybe 5’8”, had a pointy little beard, and wore a purple tie. He was clutching a thick briefcase and nervously complied with their demands, dropping the briefcase.

“Gotcha, Red Arrow,” Y/n’s chest bloomed with excitement and pride, having finally caught her prize. “Wait, where's Roy Harper?”

“Uh, he went to the bathroom.” The man stammered, unsure if this was all a trick. “I- I'm just here to cut his hair. I don't know what's going on.”

Y/n hummed, “A likely story, Red Arrow…” She bent down and opened the briefcase, revealing scissors, razors, and other supplies. “But you actually do have a lot of hair products.”

“He's gone. He ran,” Cass confirmed.

“Why would he do that?” Y/n exclaimed. “He helped us catch the Red Arrow. That was the deal. This doesn't make any sense unless…” Her mouth fell open and she realised, “Roy Harper is the Red Arrow.”

As Y/n stood there, shocked, Cass immediately jumped into action. “Put out an APB. Seal off everything for a 20-block radius.”

The audio transmitter beeped and Roy’s voice said, “Yeah, don't bother looking for me. I'm in the wind.” He made a ‘whoosing’ noise into the microphone.

“If you're close enough for me to hear you, you're close enough for me to catch you!” Y/n called back.

“Nah, I got a relay set up, sister.”

“So if you're the Red Arrow, who's this dude?” Y/n asked.

“Well, a couple of years ago you were getting really close, so I started telling all my peeps that if they ever get caught, they should say I’m Mexican, 5’8”, have a pointy beard and always wears a purple tie.”

Y/n nodded stoically. “So then you hired a guy who matched that exact description….”

Roy laughed. “No, no, no, no, no, no. That's my barber, Miguel Barragan. He gave me the idea.”

Miguel was cutting Roy’s hair and commented, “you know, if you can't come in, I do house calls. You just text me a location and I could be there in half an hour.”

Roy beamed. “Good to know.”

“You know, you should actually use him while he's there. He'll give you a crazy good fade. Lian says he… layers her hair? I don’t know.”

“I get crazy good layers from my current barber, thank you very much.” Y/n deduced, “So you dragged us over here, went in there, pretended to talk, and then snuck out the basement. Am I right?”

Roy squealed. “The basement connected to another basement! Which connected to a garage, which is where my boy picked me up with Lian.”

“Your boy? Oh, that guy from the meet-up. He works for you.” Y/n rolled her sleeves up and tugged at a strand of her hair. “He pretended to be spooked by me and Cain in the parking lot to make sure we let you go to the next meeting by yourself.”

“Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding! You win a prize!”

“You lied to me, Roy Harper,” Y/n whispered dramatically, somewhat hurt and somewhat impressed.

“You brought your daughter along?” Cass mumbled.

“Gotta be honest, I'm pretty disappointed right now,” Y/n shook her head.

“Sorry it had to go down this way, L/n.” To his credit, Roy sounded a little sad. “Maybe we could've been friends in another world.” He paused then cackled. “If I hadn't just fooled you like a little- Lian, cover your ears- bitch!” An engine revved in the background. “Bitch!”

Y/n shouted back before the line when dead, “You use that mouth to kiss your daughter, Harper?!”

“Brown.” Captain Wayne approached his teammate after a particular gruelling and unfortunate match. “Is everything okay, uh, with your brain?”

“Yeah yeah. I'm great,” Steph said. “I am having… a lot of fun.”

“Yes, I’m sure, given as you’ve said that one hundred and forty three times today.” Wayne pulled her aside and reminded her, “you do realise that if we lose this next match, we're out of the tournament?”

“Yes, but the important thing is we had a good time.”

“No!” Wayne yelled. ”The important thing is that we win the trophy! I promised Clark before he left for Italy that we would do that.” He sighed before admitting, “do you know why I chose you as my partner?”

“Because I'm the most athletic person you know?” Steph’s voice ended in a high pitched question.

“No, otherwise I would chose Todd. I chose you because of an article I read in the "Sarah Lawrence Phoenix" about a young woman they called ‘squash's unhinged lunatic.’” He pokes her in the chest for extra measure.

Stephanie swallowed harshly. “I- I haven't a clue what you're talking about, Captain.”

“According to that article,” Wayne said, ”that lunatic was 27-0. I need her on my team. I need you… to unleash the beast.”

Steph’s eyes grew wide and she inhaled sharply. Captain Wayne’s smile was just as sharp.

“Whoo!” Steph paraded into the court. “You butternuts ready to get squashed?” Their opponents stared at her and she mocked them. "’Huh? What? Duh?’ That's gonna be you guys while I smoke your butts, because Brucie and the Beast don't even give a what.” She sang the last word and waved her arms dramatically.

Bruce repeated stoically, ”we don't give a what.”

“Unh-uh. Whoo! Let's do this.”

The matches went on, and with the Beast unleashed, Stephanie and Bruce won every single one- not without earning a reputation.

“Boo-ya-kah, suckers!”

Whenever someone called her shot out, Steph had a few choice words. “You kidding me? Are you kidding me?”

But when they won a point, she was enthusiastically crazed, even to the point where she slapped Captain Wayne on the butt. “Way to go! That's it, baby!”

Y/n approached Cass’s desk. “Hey,” she mumbled. “So… I went back to his house. Unsurprisingly a dead end.”

“I have a lot of work to do, L/n,” Cass said firmly, standing up to leave.

“Wait. I want to say something.” Y/n sighed and began, “we've worked together long enough to know that you hate apologies. So, I just wanted to ask you to join the Roy Harper case. Officially, as partners. I wanna catch this guy and I can't do it without you.”

“No, you can't,” Cass agreed.

“Now I believe I owe you one thousand pushups.” Y/n grimaced.

Cass gave her friend a small smile. “I don't care about the pushups, Y/n. I care that you didn't honour our pact. I've always trusted you, and when you went against me, it made me feel like you don't trust me.”

“I know and I'm sorry. It won't happen again,” Y/n promised.

“No, it won't. Now get down on the floor.”

What?” Y/n yelped. “You just said you didn't care about the pushups!”

“I changed my mind.”

Taking a long breath, the detective said, “Fair enough. A pact's a pact.” She nodded at Cass, knowing she couldn’t back down. Y/n shed her jacket, stared Cass in the eye, and stooped to the ground, beginning to honour her deal. “One, two, three…”

“Two hundred and sixty nine…”

“Heh. Sixty-nine.” Damian chuckled as he sauntered by, snapping a picture of his best friend. “I’m using this for blackmail,” he shouted back at her.

“Okay!” Y/n gave him a weak thumbs up before going back to her pushups.

“Five hundred and thirteen…”

Jason walked past her, calling out, “Night, L/n.”

“Night. Five hundred and fourteen…” she panted.

“Hey, Derek,” Y/n greeted the night janitor. Derek waved back. “One thousand…” she did one more pushup before whining the rest of her sentence. “Is so many pushups! I'm never gonna make it.” She shouted out, “What am I at?”

Captain Wayne marched by. “Nine hundred and one.”

“Thank you, Captain.”

“You said two thousand, remember?”

“Argh! I should've trusted you, Ca-a-a-in!” she sobbed loudly, a stripe of sweat staining the back of her shirt.

“Clark, there's something we'd like to show you.” Stephanie and Captain Wayne day in front of his computer, face-timing with Bruce’s husband, Clark.

“Ta-da!” Steph held up the trophy proudly.

“Ah, magnificent.” Clark said from Italy. “The trophy is ours! I look forward to getting number four next year.”

“Actually, we've been banned for life from all future tournaments.” Wayne sucked air in through his teeth, leaning back in his chair.

“Oh, geez. What happened?”

Stephanie popped back into screen. “My fault, Clark.” The bruises on her arms and legs confirmed her words. “I snapped the second-place trophy over my knee and threw it in a toilet.”

“...Oh, my.”

“Yeah.”

“But the important thing is, we had fun,” Bruce smiled softly.

“Yeah,” Stephanie agreed.

“I don’t want to do it,” Dick said. “She’s not my problem.”

“She’s literally your problem,” Steph rolled her eyes. “You’re her sergeant.”

“And as your sergeant,” Dick said. “I command you to take care of L/n.”

Stephanie glared at him. “You’re abusing your powers, Grayson,” she whispered ominously. “Get Todd to do it!”

“Todd’s already taken care of her,” Dick nodded to Jason who had placed a doughnut and a cup of coffee on Y/n’s desk and a blanket over Y/n’s sleeping form. He had attempted to place a pillow under her head, but when he tried, Y/n had grumbled and whined. Jason didn’t want to disturb her, so he just left her on the floor. Every moment or so, Jason would glance down at Y/n to make sure she was still sleeping peacefully and a loud noise hadn’t roused her.

“They really are idiots,” Steph muttered.

“Yeah,” Dick sighed. “They are.”

#title of your sex tape #jason todd x reader #jason todd #dc x reader #dcu #detectives au #brooklyn 99 #b99 #b99/dcu #slow burn

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