#Batman is a bat uncle

[amor-godess-of-love]

I just had a thought, do you think Batman as ever paranoid when it comes to being prepared for his foes, keeps detailed database of all crows in Gotham and how close they are to Scarecrow?

Think about it, we all agree that Jonathan is total crow dad. Feeding corvids of Gotham. Offering them safe space to stay, specially during winter. Going after anyone who dares to hurt his feather babies. To point he has box full of all kinds of shines and trinkets they bring him back. Ofcourse he is much closer with some of them then others. Some crows are probably also train to work as lookouts or to scare of anyone who tries to enter his current hideout. It wouldn't be a stretch to think that he train some of them to attack Batman on sight or alarm him to his presence nearby or even alarm him if they spot him generally or simple to fly around him and caw as loud as they can to give his position away.

After all crows and bats are natural enemies.

Can you imagine Batman going out at night as usual, jumping from rooftop to rooftop, only to noticed a crow fallowing him. He get's suspicious ofcourse, but when other crows join in and start loudly cawing, alarming everyone in earshot to his presence, he is sure what had happened. Can you imagine Batman needing to pull some crazy manoeuvres to duck out crows of all things, only to be soon spotted by another one?

I think after that night he would start to keep detailed record of all crows in Gotham and try to actively update it on ones, that are train by Scarecrow to look out for him.

Maybe even training some of his bats to fight of the crows?

Well that wouldn't be the weirdest database he has, but still, having to find tactics to outmaneuver birds? Only in Gotham.

Ofcourse, crows are not only corvids in the city.

I want to Batman pulling out a Batarang only to have it stolen by magpie. I want to see Batman fighting of the birds. I want to see Batman being forced to pay "seed tax" for corvids of Gotham to leave him alone!

Now I really want all out Crows vs Bats war in Gotham.(Check out hashtags for more unhinged ideas regarding this concept)

[jesterraconteuse]

Hal Jordan finding out about Nightwing: YOU. You have a *kid*?

Batman: well... Technically he's my oldest and age of majority... But he's still my kid.

Hal Jordan: OLDEST? YOU HAVE MORE? 2? 3?

Batman visibly annoyed:... 6... Legally.

Hal Jordan: I'm going home. This has single handedly killed my willpower for a week, I need to process this.

Later....

Superman: Ah so you finally found out. I'm proud of him honestly, good to see he's willing to bond with others again.

Hal Jordan: You knew?

Superman: ...His kids basically call me Uncle Supes. I've babysat. I was around when he still just had Nightwing

WW: They're so cute! Children of such strength and bravery. Not to mention his dog, his cat, his cow... His son has animals even I've never seen before!

Hal Jordan: I've had enough.

And Hal hasn't even learned about his crime fighting cousin, batwing, Oracle, bluebird, Spoiler, and of course Jarro.

Note: everyone knows Supes is a father, he's the dad to talk your ear off about it but he's too nice with too much country charm for anyone to say anything about it. WW and Martian Manhunter are the only ones who listen absolutely intently.

[smilesheartshugs]

One trop I can’t get enough of is Bart being Wally and Dick’s kid from the future. There arnt enough fics for this trope! Should I write some? Probably, but I don’t have the creative juices to write it.

But like I want Wally and Dick to find out Bart is their kid in the most absolute random way possible

Game night: Bart doesn’t think before calling Wally dad after doing something that Bart always saw durning family game nights but he doesn’t notice

Going to get ice cream: “dad you know I always get [insert ice cream flavors here that’s like ten scoops tall with an ungodly amount of toppings and sauces]” leaving Dick confused and just getting what he would normally get Wally. This is how Bart finds out his go to ice cream use to be Wally’s go to

Gotham patrol/ party: Batman notices that impulse move a little bit to much like a bat to be a coincidence. Nightwing is off in his own little bubble so doesn’t notice, Red Robin for some reason just never questions why Impulse would call him and superboy his uncles. (Let face it Tim was running on -4 hours of sleep when Bart called him uncles) and it’s not until years later when there was like a really big holiday party with all of the justice league, titans, and other hero teams and Bart just brings presents labeled for Dad, for Pa, and other family titles instead of anyone’s actual names and that’s how they find out while Bart was under the assumption that they already knew, it’s not like he was hiding it!

To many ideas and not enough writing juice

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Danny slowly lowered himself down onto Luther's newest death machine thanks to his bat themed grappling hook. Making special care not to let his heart beat or his lungs take in breath lest Superman hear him and intervene, he used his intangibility to sink into the machine itself to steal its parts.

Yeah, so a full white outfit wasn't the best choice for stealth, but it was better than dressing like a traffic light. Plus the black gloves and boots made him feel nostalgic. It had been only seven months since the accident that took his life, so much has happened since then.

Biting his lip as he smiled as he began gathering up parts and wires with his intangibility and placing them into his bag. Lastly he grabbed the power source, which-surprise, surprise, is kryptonite.

After he grabbed what he wanted he quickly stuck a note on the maintenance panel of the machine for when someone opened it and discovered it now had a large hollow space, then simply sank down through the floor and flew to freedom.

Danny sighed once he was clear. Or, at least he thought he was.

"Young man." Crud. Danny turned around to see big blue floating behind him in all his red underwear glory. Great. "I believe you have something that doesn't belong to you." The Kryptonian said, looking pointedly at the large chunk of kryptonite Danny held under his arm.

Instead of an excuse, Danny got an idea. "Uh, hello? Recognize the mask?" He said, gesturing to his face.

Superman narrowed his eyes, staring at his face for a few very long seconds and just as Danny was about to cut his losses and book it out of there, a look of recognition graced the heros face. Sweet. "Thats Nightwings mask."

"Yeah. Just smaller."

Superman nodded, then asked, "Why aren't you wearing a bat symbol? I wouldn't have thought you were a thief if I knew you were working with Batman." Danny had to fight to keep his face neutral.

"I haven't decided what symbol I want on my suit yet." And that was true. Danny wasn't sure he wanted any symbol at all. The mark of the bat would mean that he belonged in the batclan, and Danny was a lone ghost. A wandering spirit if you will. He didn't belong anywhere.

Some small part of his mind that sounded suspiciously like Jazz said that might be one of the reasons he's been behaving so poorly lately, but he brushed it off. Superman just nodded sagely. Danny doubted he actually knew how Danny felt and was just nodding along to appear sympathetic. Adults lie, and they lie often. Danny kinda hated them for it.

"Well, I'm kinda on a deadline, so I should get going. Crime to fight, goth furry to annoy, you know how it is." Danny said, waving the arm that wasn't carrying the kryptonite around in the air before using it to readjust the bags strap on his shoulder.

"Alright," superdude smiled warmly, "Tell Batman I said hi." Danny grinned back at him as he jogged away, "Will do!"

That went better than expected. Thank you, Nightwing~! The boy thought to himself as he ran off into a secluded area and turned invisible and flying away.

Just imagining Supermans face if- no- when Batman finally breaks and tells the Justice League about the little menace thats been stealing all his and his sidekicks stuff for the last few weeks nearly sends Danny into hysterics.

Danny still has Robins sword mounted above the fireplace in his favorite safe house in Costa del Sol. Red Hoods "favorite" motorcycle was in its garage and Red Robins wrist computer and chest harness thing were mounded in a glass case next to the first thing he stole from them:

Batmans utility belt.

Sure, its a pain to remove all the tracking stuff from them, but man is he proud of those accomplishments.

Still. Its better to leave Metropolis after he got caught by Superman. Its only a mater of time before someone finds out about the old switcheroo he pulled at the last museum robbery and that combined with the bodies of those creepy rich guys he had killed (human trafficer buyers) well, surely Batman has noticed he had been gone for a while and would pick up on the matching M.O. in Metropolis.

Time to bounce.

[superbat-lmao]

Jason Todd gets blown up, resurrected, and after regaining his skills and control from Talia, goes back to Gotham and goes back to school. He leaves vigilantism entirely.

He’s taking literature and philosophy classes and just about anything to do with writing.

He makes friends, he’s on his way to normalcy.

And then he sees an opening for an opinion writer for the school newspaper.

Clark Kent gets sent the same newspaper article to read in both his civilian and superhero personas. If that’s not concerning, he doesn’t know what it.

It’s an opinion article on the state of vigilantism and hero work by a student in the next town over. And it’s a problem.

Because it’s good, too good. It feels like someone had sat in the watchtower during those first few months where everyone had been trying to work out how to function with so many different stances on morality and ethics. Should any of them really be doing this? What were the lines they couldn’t cross? If we’re working outside the law, what moral credibility do we have otherwise to justify our actions?

And sure, Clark’s written more than a few pieces criticizing Superman, but there’s a point to that. He has his own reasons. This kid, well, Clark isn’t sure of their reasons exactly. Because his gut reaction is thinking this kid is just making heroes and vigilantes look bad.

And there’s a reason that all of his and Bruce’s debates on ethics happen behind closed doors. Because to be self critical is to try and prevent hubris, but to allow public criticism at this level is to lose the faith of the public.

So Clark is torn. Because if he responds, he gives credibility to what could remain a largely unknown article. And if he doesn’t, he can’t control the reaction of other people start responding to it.

He’ll have to talk to Bruce.

[searchforahero]

it is SO sad to me that we didn't get more of uncle eddie </3 he literally shows up for a couple pages of FOUR issues of robin and thats IT (136-138, 140) like it could've been so funny to see tim and this loser failed actor guy try to convince people that they're actually family - they have a really fun dynamic for the few pages he's actually there for (being very enthusiastic in his acting and then being like SO TIMMY! howd i do? the second people are gone and tim being like. erm. maybe don't do that again...) but then he just disappears!!! never to be seen again! that's so sad.

[littlelostbirdy]

Gimme your favourite "batkids calling Bruce dad" fics please and thank you

[toomanyfandoms11]

Background on the Tim hiring Deathstroke thing in this https://www.tumblr.com/toomanyfandoms11/749474013724721152/toomanyfandoms

In my little universe that I like to maladaptive daydream in basically, Janet Drake, Slade Wilson, and Wade Wilson are all siblings.

Janet is the oldest child, and thefore according to family tradition the only child that cannot legally be linked to any crime (plz ask me about the Drake family lore. Also, Jack was the one killed by Captain Boomerang ).

Slade and Wade are twins, (their father had a sense of humor and their mother was too out of it to complain.) and bear the title of murder uncles.

Getting to the Joker bit: when Jason was being killed by the Joker, Tim was on a “family holiday”(training trip) to upstate New York (X-Mansion, most of the X-Men were too afraid to ask about the 10 year old that followed Deadpool around except for Wolverine, who taught him how to skin a moose, and Madelyne Pryor for some reason) and as a result did not learn about his death until about a month or so after it happened.

When Tim learned about his death he decided to wait a bit for Batman to settle down, thinking that he just needed to get the anger stage of grief out of the way and then he would go to therapy like a normal person. Tim was the sort of kid that would read the picture books about getting over grief when he was waiting in the doctors office.

Unfortunately, there were no picture books about superhero phycology. After about few months, Batman showing no signs of stopping and expressing his grief like a normal person, Nightwing finding out about Jason’s death through a newspaper tabloid and the two of them having an argument on top of the Gcpd station that was live-streamed by anyone with a phone and became headline news for a week, Tim decided to take matters into his own hands and hire his current favorite uncle (Wade had recently given him a pair of socks as a gift instead of the forensics book he wanted) and ask him politely (blackmail him with the time Slade had given him coffee while babysitting) to kill the Joker, “Pretty please Uncle Slade? I’ll make you cookies!”

Slade accepted this offer and went (with no small amount of glee/relief) to finally put a bullet through that waste of carbon’s skull. But, alas, Paul Verlaine (King of Assassins, Executive in the Port Mafia, Ex-Titans member and former boyfriend of Nightwing) got there first. After this, Tim’s story goes the route you would expect (with a twist~). After one too many times of Batman putting criminals in the ICU instead of talking to a therapist, Tim decides enough is enough and goes to Nightwings apartment in Bludhaven to ask him to arrange an intervention for Batman with the Justice League, or he will release Batman and Nightwings identity’s to the public.

Dick Grayson, after hearing this, dose not go “This seems like Bruce’s problem” and drop him off at the Batcave. He instead goes “who’s sassy lost child is this”, has the Bat-adoption gene arise for the first time, and decides that he will adopt this child who ran around Gotham alone stalking Batman and Robin, or die trying.

Janet, after talking with the man who drove her child back from Bludhaven at 4:30 am, is slightly leaning towards the second option, but she knows that A. Jack is a terrible father, and while she tries her best, she is also not winning mom of the year anytime soon and B. Shared custody is a thing.

And so, after 3 sword fights (one for each Drake-Wilson sibling), 5 panicked calls to Alfred about “Holy frick I’m turning into Bruce”, many late nights studying “how do I parent a 10 year old”, 1 realization of “holy **** I really do want to be a parent”, and a very well paid lawyer ( Matt Murdock), Dick Grayson becomes the legal parent of a one Timothy Drake, with the media explanation (that is true, but deleteing the superhero parts) being that Janet and Jack realized that they could not be the parents the Tim deserved to have, and that Dick Grayson could. (They got alternating weekends and cultural holidays (Jack is Chinese).

After a month or so, Dick takes Tim to meet Bruce (Dick did the intervention thing, it took the combined forces of Superman, Wonder Woman, Black Canary, Alfred, and Catwoman to get him to go to therapy.) and in the meeting Tim cheerfully reveals that A. He had figured out Batman and Robins secret identities when he was 9 (He went to a gala that the Wayne’s were at, and Dick did a quadruple somersault off of a chandelier that Tim remembered Nightwing doing) and B. He once hacked into Shield on accident when he was looking for a website that had a show he liked on it

[dudethatsmyundeaduncle]

NGL feel like the Batfam would have a much better go at it if they weren't majority white.

[inkdrawndreams]

Once again the scanner has destroyed any semblance of shading I could manage. Anyway, sure is great that this incarnation of Man-Bat doesn't accidentally transform any of his relatives hahaha...

[datacorn]

he protec

[amor-godess-of-love]

TW: mention of COVID-19

So in regards to my post on crows vs bats war I came up with idea for actual comic regarding it.

It all starts with Bruce sitting alone in batcave with few of his bats sitting on his shoulder. He is concerned, because of recent rumours that started to thrive in public in regards to bats.

Rumours that used bats relation to recent pandemic, about them being carriers of many diseases, of being aggressive to people, of sucking blood..... Are using actual facts about them like fact that they can give rabies to people and pets. All this puts public into state of panic and turns them against bats.

Ofcourse why some are real concerns, but this panic causes people to being actively hostile to bats, destroying they roost and safe places where they can sleep, leaving deadly traps for them, throwing rocks at them. It's all war on bats.

Ofcourse Bruce gets concerned, he makes public appearance where he address people concerns, but also advocates for bats, specially that they are protected species. He also start program to build safe places for bats to sleep in.

Even with Bruce speech, all laws regarding protection of bats and all city officials trying to stop a panic, they are still unease in regard to bats.

That unease soon moves to Batman himself. After all, Batman is not only themed after them, but I can imagine public seeing him use bats few times during his years of protecting the city. So ofcourse rumours start about Batman being possible carrier of diseases. Some people become afraid of him. This forced Batman to seek root of all this rumours.

And ofcourse who else but Scarecrow is source of most of them.

But to Bruce suprise when he questions Jonathan, turn out his motivation wasn't actually to hurt him or his imigine in any way, in fact he wasn't one to come up with rumours about Batman being potential carrier, he only fuel it. But once he saw the opportunity, he jump right in to turn city into fear driven chaos and used it against Batman. But in fact he started with only wishing to turn public against bats and why?

Because bats were driving out corvids from safe birdhouse he built for them around the city.

To Jonathan this made bats a bullies who were hurting his feather family. So ofcourse he took actions to protect his crows, by turning public against them and driving them away, so his crows could reclaim they homes.

Batman defeats Scarecrow no big suprise there and delivers him back to Arkham, but before he lock him up he ask Jonathan for location of all birdhouses he builded...

Bruce takes this matter seriously. He continues his project of building houses for bats, but this time making sure there are no birdhouse in area. He even makes special devices that scare off bats, while not doing them any harm and install them on birdhouse. This way, bird have they safe places to nest, while bats get safe places to sleep.

And Scarecrow reaction to all the aftermath? He is actually delighted as he reads about it in the newspaper at Arkham. Because all he wanted in that situations was for his beloved friends to be safe. Now not only they homes are safe, but Wayne foundation will provide free presentation on corvids and bats living in Gotham and how to coexist with them.

I want the comic to end up on shot of both Jonathan at Arkham courtyard and Bruce in his cave petting they respective animals.

----------------------------------------

I really would like this kind of story, I want to see Batman being worried for his flying friends. That also would show his Bruce Wayne persona and how he helps city.

But also I think it could be good Scarecrow story. Because instead of just using fear toxin, he would use his knowledge on fear to cause mass hysteria around public, using real worries to stir it against target of his choosing. But also I think it would show bit of his character. Because why yes, he used his plan to causes fear and hurt Batman.... It all started with him wanting to protect crows he sees as his family, from what he sees as "bullies" that attack them for no reason. Was there better way to do it? Yes, but it's Jonathan Crane his way of dealing with bullies is to use fear against them...

But that's just my silly creative idea in the end ^^

"Batman: The sinister stalking crow"

Would actually be a good title for that comic @jonathan-cranes-mistress-of-fear if you don't mind me using that idea

[batmanie]

Psychology of Guilt

Scarecrow: stop publishing yourself for things you didn't do

Scarecrow: I'm sure there are plenty of things you've actually done that deserv punishment.

[wildestheart4ever]

The moment I learned about the latino!Jason hc, I haven't been normal about it since......

Cultural tidbits of my life that I gleefully pass on to Jason:

I'm giving him a community with outlandish tales to share and lots of gossip. A small corner of Crime Alley where everyone knows everyone and everybody's business.

Jason is mostly white [In my head Willis was the biracial one and with Ms. White-McGee Sheila Haywood = Our precious] - tho I mean, he's probably pretty ethnically ambiguous lookin' if he thought Lady Shiva could've been his mom, right? I'm trying to make too much sense of this -

Anyways!

A latina!Catherine who raised him in a mostly Spanish-speaking household, who used to sing him that one odd lullaby I can't recall the entirety of but started like "Duérmete mí niño, duérmete ya....." that's just as weird and creepy as any other lullaby "Que viene el coco, y te llevará"

Putting him to bed with a kiss on the forehead and a sign of the cross.....depending on how religious they were.

She made him sopitos and other warm homemade dishes [Though Idk how much they could afford before things went especially bad - they'd probably only afford premade things] he taught himself to make:

Chiles Rellenos

Mole sauce on chicken with red rice

Homemade chile sitting in what once was a pickle jar

Birria

Homemade tortillas [Cause in my ma's opinion the ones in stores over there suck]. He probably has his own tortilla press sitting in the corner of his kitchen that the others think looks like a torture device - would they know what one looks like???

Chilaquiles and Enchiladas [Though I imagine they could only afford to make enfrijoladas]

The music he listens to [Tho to be fair, the things I listen to are mostly pre!2020 Luis Fonsi, Sin Bandera, Reik, and Alejandro Fernandez - and of course, band music]. And like all things in my world of imagination: I make my blorbo a good singer who would sing to these songs with abandon.

I want to immerse him in culture.

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

It was only supposed to be a simple mission. Red Robin and Nightwing were sent to investigate some magical ruins that might have a lead on one of thier shared cases. Kon had practically begged to come along since he and Tim hadn't seen eachother in a while. Nightwing didn't see a problem with it so off they went.

It was later that night when they were asleep in thier tents (Timm was forced to sleep via the power of kons puppy dog eyes) that something strange happened.

---

Phantom wobbled a bit in flight. He didn't know where or when he was. He had just escaped his parents after they saw Vlad transform and in a fit of rage, Vlad outed Danny too.

Vlad was killed pretty quickly. But Danny? They tried to "fix" Danny. It was only thanks to Jazz freeing him that he could bolt into the Ghost Zone and disappear. And bolt he did. He went so far so fast that he didn't even notice when he re-entered the living realms and just kept going.

Not wanting to make his situation worse, he decided to bed down for the night. His wounds weren't exactly healed but they were closed and that was what really mattered. He phased the blood out of his clothes as he silently approached a camp. Thier fire was out, properly drenched too. Danny had a thought to swipe some food but decided not to. Not out of morality, desperate times and all that, but because he physically couldn't muster up the energy to do anything more than curl up on the grass and pass out from exhaustion.

Needless to say when Tim wakes up the next morning and sees what appears to be a younger version of himself curled up outside he freaks out. He sneakily snags a sample and compared it to his own DNA and, suprise! Its a match. Aside from the obvious marks of cloning in his genetic structure and this odd unknown element sticking to it he was a perfect match for Tim Drake Wayne.

Nightwing woke up to find Tim standing over his unconscious mini and muttering about him being a dad. Dick was glad he packed that expensive coffee. They were all going to need it.

Kon was just excited to be an uncle.

[dark-dragon-8]

I actually read a fic where Slade killed people who hurt/tried to hurt Dick, but in a more "murder uncle" way (and Dick also knew about it). So, in my head, this is pretty much the same as the fic, and Slade isn't Nightwing's lover (you can think of him as whatever, I don't care, this is just how I see it), he's just the murder uncle who does nice stuff for him and Conner just confused him with Wally/Roy/whoever because he's the one Lex has been complaining about/the only one that made sense with the information that he had available to him at the time.

Tim: *complaining to Kon* Dick is always going on about how romantic his secret lover is. Why can’t you do something romantic too?

Kon, who heard his other Dad Luthor complaining about Deathstroke taking out people who put out hits on Nightwing: YOU WANT ME TO COMMIT GENOCIDE?!