#(just in case. since i ranted a bit about luke)

[aperrywilliams]

That Wasn't Fake (Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader)

------------------ 

Author Masterlist

------------------

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader.

Request: Can you write a Spencer fic where the reader is kind of quiet and shy when she begins working at the BAU, and Spencer has a crush on her, and then they have a case, and she has to like to seduce the unsub lowkey and everyone kind of like...how is she going to do this shes not very outgoing but when she does shes really good at it, and everyone is surprised and impressed.

Summary:  You're shy and reserved. Spencer has a crush on you, and unbeknown to him, you have a crush on him. Maybe the cat can get out of the bag when you have to step aside of your comfort zone to catch an elusive unsub.

Word Count: 4.2k (no self control here)

Warnings: Words like 'fuck' and 'bitch'. A rant about self-doubt. Typical CM stuff: unsubs, killings, etc.

A/N: Another request I loved! It should have been a little shorter, but I'm having a hard time getting to the point these days. Please keep sending requests!

---------------

Spencer knows it is inappropriate, but he can't help it. You're coworkers, and that itself sets a boundary, so he shouldn't be thinking of trespassing.

But the crush he has on you seems to grow every day.

He doesn't know if it is your beautiful smile, the kindness you show in everything you do, or the enthusiasm you put into every task you are committed to. Since the moment he saw you pass the bullpen glass doors, Spencer knew he was damned.

From that moment, Spencer knew he wanted to know you and learn everything about you. About what you liked, what you hated, and what your fears and dreams were. Everything.

But not much after that revelation in his mind, he understood it wasn't going to be easy to get to you.

You were extremely shy and reserved.

In fact, your first interaction - when Emily introduced you both - consisted of a wave of your hand and a timid 'nice to meet you.'

He thought as time went by, you would loosen and become less bashful and quiet. And in part, he was right. As the months passed, you began to feel more comfortable within the team. You laughed at Luke's jokes, you commented on Rossi's stories, and you could even - when the stars aligned - crack a joke yourself to Tara or Matt.

But beyond that, no one knew much about your life outside of the BAU, unlike JJ, who always talks about her kids and her husband, or Matt, who talks about his kids, too. Or Tara, who recounts her failed dates. Or the same Luke who always shows photos of Roxy.

You, on the other hand, seemed to be an enigma. But Spencer Reid loved decoding enigmas.

At first, he turned his interest in you out of mere scientific curiosity. However, internally, he knew it wasn't just that.

It started with small random questions about the times you worked together: Is this coffee okay? What was the last book you read? Do you think we should buy some donuts for the team?

If you were honest, it picked your interest why, from all people, Dr. Spencer Reid was so adamant in making conversation with you.

From what you knew and from what the team said, Spencer was not a person very interested in things other than work or books. But suddenly, out of nowhere, he asked you what the last movie you saw was or something like that.

You always answered his questions; however, you would have liked to be much more talkative and engage in longer conversations, but your nature stopped you.

'What if I don't have anything more interesting for him to say?'

'Does he just talk to me because he feels sorry for me?'

And that was the big issue: you have never had problems with the way you live your life. You're pretty satisfied with what you do in your job and out of it, too. But you have always thought you are too 'simple' to entertain people's interest.

And to be honest, being surrounded by people with so much experience and big things happening in their lives still intimidates you a bit. So, you usually refrain from talking too much about yourself or anything for that matter.

But with Spencer, things are a bit different. He's always checking on you but respects your boundaries. He has learned that sometimes you just don't want to talk, and he doesn't push.

Despite his interest beyond the professional, Spencer would never do anything to make you uncomfortable. Being able to share time with you will have to be enough for him.

In a way, he has become your protector. He is your backup during interrogations or in situations where you can feel awkward, like the times when some police officers tried to flirt with you and got too close. Sure, you know how to turn them down, but sometimes guys don't get the memo and keep pushing. You're too shy to yell or be aggressive about it.

The team also understands the way you are, and they know it does not make you any less professional. However, they have always been careful not to take you too much out of your comfort zone.

---------------

A whole two weeks and five murders later, the team is stuck trying to catch an unsub who has preferences for killing women after club nights. The profile says he is not interested in just any woman but in those between 25-30 years old who like to flirt with several men in the clubs. But it is not just any type of flirting; it is the type that is initiated and dominated by them. In short, he likes to kill women who are the opposite of submissive. He sees them as predators on a hunting ground.

Another finding in victimology is that the women he kills, in addition to having a specific age range, have very similar physical characteristics. And similar to you.

All his victims have your build, eye color, hair color, and height. It gets to be creepy to a certain point. And it's something difficult to ignore.

Bouncing information and possible strategies, the team agrees they need to be proactive to get him to show up before another killing happens.

"Okay, what options do we have?" Emily asks.

"The witnesses haven't gotten us anywhere," Luke complains.

"Although we've narrowed down his hunting grounds," Rossi shrugs.

"Yeah, we know the clubs where he likes to hunt," JJ backs Rossi.

"But although the profile, we have yet to learn about what to look for there. I mean, we know what the unsub wants, but not how he looks like." This time, it's Tara who speaks.

You've rarely seen Emily bite her tongue when she wants to say something, but it's clear that she has something on her mind, and she doesn't know how to put it, or maybe the problem is something else. You look at her out of the corner of your eye, and she looks back at you; what do those eyes say? They look like they're even apologetic.

It's a fraction of the time before she comes back to behave like herself.

"We need to lurk him. It's the only way," she says. And everyone's eyes - yours included - are on her immediately.

"Lurk him?" Matt repeats.

"Yes. And all we know who should be the one going undercover to do that," Emily adds, looking at you this time.

That's it—the elephant in the room.

Of course, you're the ideal candidate. Well, you're perfect in the physical aspect because if we talk about the victim's personality and yours...

There's silence in the room, and you can feel like the team's eyes are all on you.

Do they expect you to say no? To refuse? From your perspective, it's not a question; it's more like the option you all have to catch the guy.

"It's true (Y/N) would be the closest to the unsub type, but there are a lot of things to take into account," Matt says. And you know perfectly well what's behind his words, even if he doesn't say it directly.

And that's okay; it's perfectly plausible they have their doubts. It is not enough to look like the victims for the operation to work.

But if there is one thing you are sure of, it's that you will always give your all to your job, even if that means becoming a completely different person.

"I can do it," you mumbled so quietly that if the AC weren't in the lower setting, people wouldn't have heard you.

"But (Y/N), you know about this guy. It's dangerous," Matt points, a frown on his face.

"Not to mention he likes rough interactions," Luke adds.

"You don't have to do it if you feel uncomfortable." This time, it is JJ who voices her opinion. And you know, that's the closest reason to the team's main concern.

And the fact you can blow up the entire plan.

Spencer stays in silence. Internally he's freaking out thinking of you having to lurk on the unsub, but he knows you are a professional. And he feels a kind of deja vu.

When he was younger, the team would have said the same about him doing something like that. Spencer knows what it's like when people baby you, making you feel insecure. Sure, he hasn't had to worry about that anymore. Spencer is almost forty, and no one would dare to tell him he can't do something. Not after all the things he has been through.

"JJ is right, Bella. You don't have to do it. We can think of another way," Rossi backs JJ.

That's when Spencer notices the slight frown on your face. It's invisible to everyone but him. He knows it's there.

You stay collected, even when everyone on the team has something to say about how bad the idea of you going undercover to lurk the unsub is.

Emily is who stops everyone's rant.

"Guys, hey. If (Y/N) is telling us she can do it, we're going to do it. Of course, we'll be there to back up her and catch this unsub."

And this is how the discussion is settled.

Emily sends everyone out with a task to prepare for the night. Today is Friday, and the unsub will surely be stalking some new victim. The chances are high.

When it's just you and Spencer in the room, he still looks at you in silence.

"Do you also think I'll not be able to pull off this mission and I'm going to ruin everything?"

You downcast your gaze, exhaling deeply.

"No. I don't think that," Spencer clarifies, and you raise your gaze to meet his eyes. "You are more than capable, (Y/N). The team is worried because you'll be out of your comfort zone in a dangerous situation."

"The team? Not you?" You narrow your eyes to him.

You try not to sound accusatory, but if you're as scared as everyone, you also are fed up with the other's doubts.

Spencer closes the distance between you both but doesn't invade your personal space.

"Of course, I'm worried too! I don't want anything bad to happen to you. But I trust you and your judgment."

Your heart does flip-flops, and you're not sure if it's because Spencer is worried or because, despite that, he trusts you—or both.

"You do?" You ask, not so convinced.

Spencer nods and smiles at you.

"And we'll be there when you catch the guy."

If that is the reassurance you need, you don't mention it. Instead, you grin at Spencer as a promise you'll do your job just how you are supposed to.

---------------

You insist on getting ready in your hotel room. The only assistant you ask for is Emily. She was the one who trusted you first in this, so you'll take every piece of advice she can give you before this night starts.

Everyone has a role in the plan.

Rossi will be the chauffeur who will drive you to the club.

Luke and Spencer would be in the club, mingling with the patrons. JJ, Matt, and Emily would be in the van monitoring the whole situation with cameras and earpieces. Rossi would keep his facade as a driver so he could be at one of the entrances. Tara would be at the club, too, eyeing nothing suspicious going on in the bar because there is a chance the unsub is getting help from the bartender.

When you are in front of the mirror applying the last touch of makeup, Emily is looking at you with a stare you can't decipher.

"What?" you ask, and Emily chuckles.

"Please, don't take this in a bad way, but I never thought I would live the day of seeing you using clothing like this. And Jesus, you look so hot!"

Your cheeks redens.

"It's a little bit odd coming from my boss, don't you think?" you muse, smoothing the fabric of your dress.

"Point taken," Emily raises her hands in defense. "Although I know someone who is going to run out of breath after seeing you."

You let out a scoff. It's not a surprise for you. The BAU girls - boss included - have been trying to set you up with Spencer since forever. You don't entertain the idea only because you don't think it's possible and not because you don't like the concept.

"Come on, don't say that. You are not helping to my nerves."

"Sorry, I'll shut up. We should go, though," Emily says, checking her watch.

One of the SUVs drives you to the van parking point. You needed to review the operation details.

At the back of the van - or commander point - JJ, Luke, Tara, Rossi, Matt, and Spencer see you come up with Emily.

For the best US profilers, they're not doing a good job hiding that they are gawking at you. Surely, no one imagined seeing you in such a revealing outfit. Outfit that, without a doubt, suits you extremely well, highlighting all your body attributes.

Spencer feels like he died and was resurrected after seeing you.

"Okay, guys, we need to check the details again," Emily announces.

The plan is in motion, and everyone is in position.

As expected, you arrive with Rossi at the club, who opens the door for you and helps you descend from the car. Rossi gives you a reassuring smile before letting you go.

Like a switch, you are no longer the shy SSA (Y/L/N). Now you are the woman who is going to take what she wants and attract the unsub attention doing that.

Your walk is determined, and your eyes send out flames of confidence to those who look at you. The music is very loud, something that would usually bother you, but not now. This needs to feel like your environment. That's how you like it, you tell yourself.

Almost instantly, you start to attract the looks of men who are eager for a woman like you.

You exude determination, and you don't go unnoticed.

Walking into the club, you make brief eye contact with Luke, who is on the dance floor. You see Spencer perched in a booth, nursing a beer.

At the same time, Tara is stationed at the bar.

"Remember (Y/N); the unsub expects the woman to approach men. The flirt needs to come from you," Emily reminds you by the earpiece hidden in one of the earrings you're wearing.

"Show time," you mumble to yourself.

You walk seductively to the dance floor, where a young man is dancing with a blonde. You approach and whisper something in his ear. That makes the boy completely lose interest in the blonde and start dancing with you. You smile and cling to the man's body, who wastes no time and takes your hips as if they were his possessions.

That dance certainly has nothing innocent about it. You continue whispering things in the boy's ear, and he looks more and more excited. Once you consider it a reasonable amount of time to have attracted attention, you leave the boy alone and head to the bar. Just a few meters away from Tara, a suspicious man is staring at you. You see him out of the corner of your eye as you order a drink. When the bartender passes it to you, you make subtle eye contact with Tara, who nods, indicating that the drink is clean.

You look next to you and see another man not so subtly looking at you. You know the unsub's profile, and you can't be intimidated or dominated by another man. You are the one who calls the shots. Otherwise, this will not work.

Before the man makes his attempt to seduce you, you turn to him, and with a penetrating look and disdainful voice, you stop him.

"Sorry, honey. Don't waste your time. You're not my type," and with that, you leave to move to the opposite side of the club. The guy huffs, and you're almost sure hearing him call you 'bitch' under his breath.

JJ, who's following the cameras inside the club, sees someone who looks suspect.

"Hey, this guy has been peeking at (Y/N) the entire time, and look, he clenched his fists when (Y/N) turned down that guy at the bar."

Emily confirms JJ's observation before giving you the next instructions.

"(Y/N), you're doing great. We have a possible target. So we need to raise the bet."

You know exactly what Emily means. You both had talked about the strategy to follow, having more details about what you should do than the rest of the team.

Matt and JJ look confused at each other but say nothing.

Your next step is to find another dude to seduce before delivering the coup de grace.

Luke and Spencer keep an eye on you. And while Luke is pleasantly surprised by your audacity, Spencer can't help but feel his stomach tighten. He tells himself it's because he is afraid something bad could happen to you, but inside of him, it's that and the fact of seeing you flirt with other men.

Just like you did with the guy on the dance floor, you attract the attention of another man; this time, you take his hand and pull him to the dance floor.

JJ and Matt's jaws drop to the floor. If Tara, Luke, and Spencer could do the same without giving themselves away, they would have done it, too.

As if it were your second nature, you laugh and move to the music. The man seems to enjoy the moment so much that he takes a bold step by leaning in to kiss you. You let him get closer until his lips are almost on yours. But before touching each other, you pull back with a malicious smile.

"Naughty boy. I'm who says if you can kiss or no," you pout, faking disappointment. Dizzed, the guy cocks his head and sees you walk away.

Matt chirps now. "It's him. Look boss," he tells Prentiss, pointing to the same guy JJ saw before.

There is no longer any doubt that it is him. Now you just have to catch him red-handed.

"(Y/N), we got him. It's time for the last play," Emily tells you.

With Emily's instruction, you go to the bar for another drink before heading over to where Spencer is sitting.

He tries to play it off, but he has no idea why you're approaching him.

"Is this seat taken, handsome?" You ask, with your drink in hand.

"N- no. Please," Spencer gestures to the booth on his front, but you opt to perch to his side. Spencer thinks he never has been this close to you. He looks at your eyes, and it's like you are a totally different person. It's a little bit contradictory for him, to be honest. He already likes you just as you are, but this version of you? It's driving him insane.

Some resemblance of your true self looks with a kind of curiosity the nervousness on Spencer. You don't think much about it; you assume he's playing the nervous guy who is baffled by you.

The thing is, Spencer isn't playing. He's definitely baffled by you.

"Are you okay?" You ask him, masking your question with a seductive smile.

"Yeah. Are - are you?" Spencer stutters a bit—something that is perfect for the plan but embarrassing for him.

You get closer to him to speak in his ear.

"This was Emily's idea," you tell him before kissing his ear and gently biting his lobe.

Spencer's breath hitches in his throat, and he thinks he's going to pass out any second. You're not doing it better: your heart is also pumping hard from the adrenaline. Of course, you had imagined something like that with Spencer, but only in your erotic dreams. You wouldn't dare do this on any given day.

You keep teasing Spencer, who, despite the nervousness, tries to play along. If this is the closest he will ever have you, he wants to engrave this in his memory.

"Just a little push, (Y/N). We almost have him," Emily instructs by the earpiece.

You swallow as subtly as possible as you wrap your arm around Spencer's neck, pulling him closer to you.

It's only a second between that action and the fact that you're kissing Spencer like it's your last meal.

Spencer doesn't know how to respond, and you were counting on that; it was enough time for the unsub to notice that you were the one who chose her last prey.

When Spencer is about to reciprocate the kiss, you murmur a 'sorry' into his lips and quickly pull away, giving him a disdainful look—which you hope he understands is fake—before getting up and walking toward the back exit door.

As expected, the unsub follows you towards the back door, and while your back is turned, he believes he has the advantage to attack you. What he doesn't know is that Matt and Luke are ready to lunge at him the moment he tries to touch you.

Everything that happens after is too fast.

The unsub is detained and taken to a patrol car while the team gathers around you, congratulating you on the successful operation. They all apologize to you for their previous apprehensions. You tell them that you understand and that there is no need to apologize. And it's like the switch has been flipped again since you came out of the femme fatale role.

But something is wrong. Spencer is not in the group. You see him a little further away, near the exit door of the club. Emily notices the looks between you both, and she sends the team on different tasks to close the case, leaving you and Spencer there.

There's something in his eyes that you can't decipher. You think it's resentment for using him without warning him what you were going to do.

You shyly approach him.

"It's me again," you tell him, pulling a face. You don't know what to say to make the situation better. Spencer nods.

"Yeah. You did it great, by the way," he compliments you. But it doesn't feel good like Spencer's compliments usually do.

"Look, about the kiss back there-" you start. He needs an explanation as a bare minimum.

"I know. It was fake," Spencer cuts you off.

Those words shouldn't hurt you as they do now. But isn't that the most reasonable thing to believe? The you in the club weren't you, so all you did inside was pretend.

Everything except that kiss.

If it's true you couldn't enjoy it the way you would have liked, you will never forget his lips on yours.

A tense silence takes over the moment. This is not okay.

You can't afford to lie to one of the most important people in your life, even if telling the truth takes you out of your comfort zone.

What the hell! Tonight has already been a total of 180 from a usual day for you.

"It wasn't," you mumble, and you see his eyes flicking to yours in a second.

"What?" Spencer asks, narrowing his eyes at you.

"Everything was fake, but not the kiss," you say with a stadied voice this time.

Spencer's heart races again. If you say you didn't fake it, then what he felt on your part at that moment was real?

"It wasn't fake?" He asks for clarification. You nod.

A smirk forms on Spencer's lips, seeing your cheeks redden.

There you are. The girl he had fallen for in the past two years.

"Well, you know that I am a man of science, right?" he tells you, and you frown because you have no idea where this is going.

"I know," you say with some hesitation.

"And as a man of science, I need evidence of things, you know?"

Now, you are the one who smirks at him.

"Evidence, huh?"

"Yep," he says, emphasizing the 'p' and swaying his body on his feet. You hum.

"I believe I can provide the necessary evidence if you need them," you concede, and Spencer's eyes sparkle with excitement.

Now, he is the one who reaches out and cups your cheeks. Your breathing quickens, but that doesn't stop you from standing on your tiptoes and connecting your lips with his.

This time, there is no unsub, no curious eyes are looking at you, there is no rush, there is no femme fatale role, and above all, this is not fake; it's as real as the fact that your heart beats for him, and his for you.

------------------ 

Spencer Reid's Taglist: @dreatine @nomajdetective @jayyeahthatsme @rosalinasam2 @averyhotchner @lovelyxtom @princessmiaelicia @pastelbabygirl19 @reidsbookclub @alexxavicry @gspenc @spencerreidisbae123 @calmspencer @pauline5525mgg @anamiad00msday @milivanili99 @laylasbunbunny @leahblackk @miaxx03 @missabsey @taintedstranger @khxna @hiireadstuff @pleasantwitchgarden @dysphoricsanity @levi-of-starz @themoonchildwhofell @silver138 @lovelybaka @shinytinywhispers 

[11queensupreme11]

Yes, I am making a reaction fic....... eventually lol

i know it says i started this back in 2023, but all i really did was make a cover. i didn't start making any chapters until a few months ago hehe

BUT ANYWAYS YES YOU READ THAT RIGHT! i am making a reaction/reading the books/watching the movies fic for arsenic blues!!!! in this case, it will be ror reacting to pjo

for anyone interested to learn more, go under the cut!

(this started off as me just giving you some info about cerulean cyanide, but then i ended up ranting about how much i loved the pjo tv show lol, soooo if you haven't watched it, don't go down)

first off, THIS IS MY FIRST TIME MAKING A REACTION FIC! i've read a lot of them, but i have no experience in actually making one. i'm kinda nervous ngl 😅

secondly, i've already started... somewhat. i've copied all chapters of the lightning thief into a google doc and made necessary edits, but i haven't written any reactions... YET. i want to include the ror gods AND humans as members of the audience, and since i haven't written about the ror humans as thoroughly yet, i won't be writing the reactions until i get to act 2 of arsenic blues, since that's when the ror humans are introduced. this is important for me because i don't have their characterizations down yet, and won't until i actually start writing about them and their dynamics with percy. same goes with cú chulainn, he's a literal love interest, but won't get introduced until act 2!

thirdly, because of what i said up there ^ cerulean cyanide won't be published until act 2 is finished to avoid spoiling what happens during ragnarok and the god's apocalypse.

fourthly, IT WILL BE INTERMIXED WITH THE TV SHOW!!! i fucking LOVED the show and (most of) the changes that were made, so i'm totally going to add them into percy's past that the ror characters will be reacting to.

so what elements of the show should you expect to see? glad you asked!

POSEIDON 💙

poseidon in the books is great, but i loooooove the new stuff they put in the tv show. in the books, we're mostly told that poseidon loves percy and there are times where it's shown, but it's kinda hard to pick up since the books are written in PERCY'S POV, and since poseidon is literally restricted from interacting with him, it's hard to notice how much he actually loves his son when he's not even allowed to be AROUND the dude who's perspective takes up the whole series.

but in the tv show, it's not just percy's perspective that's explored! that little moment poseidon had with sally told us SOOOO MUCH about how he actually felt for the both of them. and when he and percy finally met??? THE ANGST AND LONGING THEY BOTH SHOWED UHDFSIGVSVGD I LOVED IT SO MUCH

AND THE FACT THAT HE NOT ONLY SAVED PERCY FROM ZEUS BUT ALSO SURRENDERED??? HE GAVE UP HIS PRIDE AND PRIDE IS SUCH A HUGE AND IMPORTANT THING FOR GODS BUT HE GAVE IT UP WITH NO HESITATION AHHHHHHH 😭

so yes, expect to see a lot of the poseidon scenes from the tv show

HERMES BEING AT THE LOTUS CASINO

i actually really like the fact that hermes was shown in here instead of the next season. some people were confused as to what the point was for having him in the casino and why he tricked the kids into staying at the casino longer, but i found this post on tumblr that explains why he could've been there:

in the last olympian, we (and percy) find out that hermes knew all along what luke's fate would be; that he would rebel against the olympians, bring forth kronos, become his host, etc. he knew ALL OF THAT. but he was never allowed to tell him (ancient laws), so he tried to CHANGE luke's fate in order to save him even though he knew it was pointless.

we get a bit of that in the tv show. hermes was there because he wanted to change luke's fate. he tricked the kids into staying at the casino longer so they would pass the deadline. war would come, and luke would get away with his thievery and nobody would know it was him because they're all too busy trying to kill each other. but ofc, like always, it didn't work because you can never change fate.

i love how the show showed us that hermes was trying to change his fate in the first season whereas in the books, it only started in the second book where he was introduced for the first time.

THE GODS' CRUELTY AND THEIR LOVE

the gods' cruelty and apathy was much more obvious in the show's first season compared to the first book. in the first book, most of the gods shown were jerks at best but the tv show really showed us how horrible of a family they are (most of them at least) to each other and their kids

like what show!ares said, his family loves to stab each other in the back, they love to hurt each other to get a higher leg up; they're not really a family. the audience and percy becomes VERY aware of that unlike in the books where it's more sugar-coated at the start.

we're shown very early on that they're not good people, but at the same time, we're shown that some of them DO care.

hephaestus was abused and mistreated by his family, but he refuses to be like them which is why he released percy from his trap; because he realizes that he and annabeth are good kids (ending the cycle). hermes loves his son and desperately wants to change his fate despite being told over and over again that its pointless. poseidon loves percy and wishes to be a proper family with him and sally, but isn't allowed to.

there are some good gods out there, which is why percy decided to stand by them instead of taking luke's offer to bring it all down. he's been shown that some gods ARE good. unlike in the first book where you don't really meet any decent gods, so book!percy honestly didn't have much of a reason to defend them, yet he did anyway when luke left camp. the show gave him (and us) a better reason to actually defend them

in the show, he's exposed to the god's cruelty, but he sees that it's not as black and white as he once thought "oh all the gods are bad and none of them care for their kids >:(", he sees the good in some of them and it's enough to make him want to save them instead of letting them crash and burn (like luke, who's blinded by his anger and hatred *cough cough* fatal flaw!!!! *cough cough*).

LUKE AND PERCY'S RELATIONSHIP

SHOW!LUKE WAS SO MUCH BETTER THAN BOOK!LUKE IMO.

book!luke was trying to kill percy very early on and was pretty much pretending to be his friend the whole time. yes his intentions and character get fleshed out as the books go on, but his relationship with percy... didn't offer much.

then there's show!luke who genuinely liked him and wanted to recruit him rather than kill him (that's why there's no scorpion scene). his betrayal was more personal and painful for percy. the fact that annabeth was there to watch it all happen was even better (not for her though LOL).

(and dont even get me started on how show!luke didn't hate grover like in the books. the genuine fear in his eyes when he found out that percy gave the shoes to him and the way his eyes got all misty??? he fully blames thalia's "death" on him and him only THE ANGUISH WAS SO 😭😭😭)

AND I THINK THAT MIGHT BE ALL?

so yes, these are some of the changes you should expect to see!

i wanna really contrast how different things are between the ror and pjo verse. ror gods are very close and tight-knit whereas the pjo gods are... well, "a mess" as percy so eloquently put it.

ror gods aren't forced under the tyrannical rule of zeus, their zeus is chill and just wants to have fun. they have no restrictions to follow and their divine laws aren't as oppressive

whereas pjo gods are under the tyrant rule of zeus and can't even interact with their kids.

ror gods are independent while pjo gods have to rely on the preservation of western civilization to stay alive and use demigods to break rules, etc etc.

pjo gods (some, at least) are kinder and have no issues falling in love with humans and loving their demigod children while ror gods are cruel assholes who commit genocide against humanity despite being the ones to create them

and etc etc.

ANYWAY, I HOPE YOU GUYS ARE AS HYPED UP AS I AM!!!! 🥳🥳🥳 can't wait to start writing reactions for the first time ever 🫨

[witchlingcirce]

please rank your favorite circle members. i would love to see that

OHHHH this one is kinda hard, especially since I’d probably put some of them in the same ranking: HOWEVER here is my ranking

Hm: Michael Wayland

He’s up here because I don’t care about him one bit, I’m sorry. I forgot he existed, lol. To me, his character just kinda exists for Robert to have some kind of internal conflict.

1. Maryse Lightwood

Is this kinda unexpected?? Idk. I remember rereading TMI and just thinking about how cool and great she is. I think her and Luke have the most interesting turn around when it comes to the circle! I cannot wait to be getting my dearest Maryse crumbs when we get Claces BIB story.

2. Luke/Amatis Graymark

The Graymark siblings are sharing a spot here because I actually really love them both. Now obviously Amatis doesn’t really get all that much page time, but I’ve always really loved her- she stood out to me when I first read city of glass. And LUKE, him in the first three books was always such a delight!! Him and Clary’s fatherism deserved to be shown more. I wish he still had a more prominent role in the last three books loke he did the first three!!

3. Celine Montclaire

SHE is probably one of the most interesting circle members, I could talk about her forever and forever and forever and forever. The way the constant loneliness and helplessness she felt throughout her child impacted her relationships and also her actions is really interesting. All she wanted was to fr just be happy. Her story in GOTSM is a blessing.

4. Jocelyn Fairchild

Jocelyn should probably be higher but I never connected with her as much as I maybe wanted to. HOWEVER; I would go down defending her, she’s so mischaracterised 99% of the time. She’s actually a pretty cool character, she’s always had a lot of scenes that stood out to me- and I could talk about her relationship with Sebastian forever!

5. Robert Lightwood

I have never really been connected to Robert as a character, and the first couple of times I reread tmi I just didn’t really care for him. I HAVE however changed my opinion a bit, I find him an interesting character. And I think the way his character is TFTSA and beyond is pretty cool- I have however thought killing him was a bit stupid.

6. Stephen Herondale

I actually don’t really share the common opinion on Stephen that he’s the worst person ever. I feel like people always only look at him as acting on his own thoughts and feelings when he too was manipulated by Valentine- but that’s a rant for another day. Stephen’s OKAY, he’s just one those character where I don’t think we really get anything from him. For the most part he’s always just a side character.

7. Valentine Morgenstern

It’s actually crazy how he lowkey changed the shadowhunter world. Valentine, while he’s definitely not a better villain than Sebastian- he’s definitely a good villain. The scene in COA where he literally goes to Simon’s house and kidnaps him always makes me laugh!! Like oh… okay! He’s definitely an interesting character, and I find the way he was able to manipulate everyine fascinating, like wow… every shadowhunter is easy to manipulate.

8. Hodge Starkweather

Hodge is here because while I think his character concept is interesting, I don’t think his character ever did anything that genuinely stood out to me, personally. I could talk about how I think he’s a really interesting case of how classism works in the shadowhunter community and how I think his punishment affected him: but yeah he’s just a guy to me in all honestly !!

TYSM FOR THE ASK! This was so much fun!!!

[simpystuff]

A little bit of a rant/essay about smg34

Okay to start, I am a huge smg34 shipper, always has been ever since I started watching during 2018/2019. I've watched most of the classic smg4 episodes, and I'm up to date in the recent ones too.

There is so much speculation as to what smg4 and smg3s relationship is, whether its platonic or romantic/sexual. Despite obvious indications, some people are firm believers that they are just best friends or brothers. So I'm here right now at 4:13am typing out an essay that proves that what they have going on is anything but platonic, and a little bit of a rant at the end too. (please do note that this essay is completely done up on the spot with no previous planning or order, so some things might not make so much sense.)

I'm starting off by analysing smg4 and smg3s characters as a whole and their dynamic. Smg3s character is Tsundere (by definition, "Tsundere meaning is an adjective for a person or character who is usually cold or harsh but sometimes shows a warm or kind side, especially to a love interest") and leading by definition, Smg3 is usually cold hearted, but does occasionally act nice and worries or cares about his friends and particularly smg4. This type of character tends to call their love interest "Baka", which is an insult that can mean "stupid" or other variations that depend. Smg3 calls Smg4 this in many cases, starting around the genesis arc, and continues up to even now. Smg4 is clearly Smg3's love interest, and as that character role, Smg4 teases Smg3 about his behaviour, even calling him a "tsundere" at some point in the internet graveyard.

Related to the subject, Smg3's behaviour is extremely flamboyant, and in the fandom wiki, he is described "he is gay in a stereotypical manner" - and in the Hobo Bros video where Luke and Kevin look at smg3 on the smg4 fandom wiki, neither of them seem to objectify to this statement. (We will also get to the creators views and words later on.) Even though "gay" has many stereotypes and doesn't usually abide by the few we have, the statement is quite frankly true without needing explanation. Like I previously mentioned, in many instances where Smg4 teases Smg3 about his behaviour, Smg3 blushes. That's right, he blushes. Like a Tsundere character would, he blushes, denies, turns away and calls Smg4 a "baka". He does this a lot, even if he doesn't include the "baka" in there, he definitely blushes.

Leading through their history, Smg3 and Smg4 have had a rivalry since Smg3 came around. People at this point were probably already shipping them together from the start, since a rivals to lovers trope is wildly loved and especially in the smg4 fandom. In most of the early smg4 days when smg4 came around, there wasn't much to speculate on - At that point they were rivals and nothing much else. But also mentioning the sm64 blooper "Snow Trapped", this obviously changes with the events that take place. What's good to note as well, is the fact that it's been brought up in WOTFI 2023 in the quiz trivia mission that asked "What happened at exactly 6:50 of the classic smg4 episode: Snow Trapped?" - to of which, the option "let's find out" was most voted for, and we had an audio clip of what had happened (which was them "making love")

Also going a little more into Snow Trapped, some people claimed that they weren't in fact doing the boombayah - and I think that's a load of bollocks /nm. With smg3 and smg4s n64 characters crouching and un-crouching behind and in front of each other and the audio clip that was placed on top, I don't think it was very hard to mistake for something else. And even more proof with that fact that before this clip, Smg4 said that they could forgive each other and "make some love before we die." That's clear indications as to what happened and it's not that hard to understand.

Like I mentioned before, the creators Luke and Kevin, and even James Bailey (the voice actor of smg3) had some words and whatnot about smg3 and smg4's sexuality and/or relationship. When reading the fandom wiki's about smg3 and smg4's sexuality, Luke didn't objectify against anything said - when the wiki had said that Smg4 may be hinted to be gay or bisexual, and when it says that smg3 could also be gay, even saying "I don't know" which could mean that it's indicated or could be speculated their exact sexuality. And with the fact that Kevin wrote Snow Trapped, I think there's a lot of indication that neither of them are straight. James Bailey, during a stream on his twitch, had a question about smg3 and how he'd describe him, to which he replied "imagine Shadow The Hedgehog but Gay." Later in the stream, he received a question asking if Smg3 was gay and he replied "He's not straight, I'll tell you what."

The problem the fandom usually has is the fans who claim they are "classic" smg4 fans but have no knowledge whatsoever on smg3 and smg4's relationship. The biggest they know is that they are rivals, and then claim that they are brothers when they clearly aren't - and assuming they were around for the release of Snow Trapped or had at least seen it, they'd know that isn't the case anyway. Even funnier the fact they claim that smg34 "ruined" smg4, even though that ship has been around probably since the start of their rivalry (I'll speculate on this because I know a lot of people do like a rivals to lovers trope)

That's the end of my essay people, leave a like or comment if there's anything else you'd like me to write smg4 related essays about and I'll give my opinions on it. If you've read up to this point, I love you, hope you have a good day or night.

[rorysterr]

hello, my friend! 🧡 i saw your matchups were open, and i'm a little nervous submitting this, but i'd love to be considered for one! :3 (also, i have no idea if i'm doing this correctly, lol, so please let me know if i messed up!)

about ✨ me ✨

personality: i'm pretty introverted! i only really warm up and talk to people if they talk to me. i don't usually speak in group settings unless spoken to (actually, i hate group settings lol). but, once you do get to know me, i'm really funny, blunt, honest, and lowkey kind of sassy 😭 i get really defensive and possessive over what's mine, and i've kind of always had a problem with sharing.

likes: i love video games (i play on pc, xbox, nintendo switch, mobile, and playstation!) (and i play fps games a lot, as well as horror games! plus the occasional farm life game), i love anime (attack on titan is my absolute favorite! but i really enjoy dark and mysterious animes!), i love writing, reading, drawing, swimming, singing, and shopping (whether online or in person). i also love iced coffee, matcha, milk tea and boba, and sweet treats 🙂‍↕️ I love collecting things, like figures, cards, pins, crystals, etc. i also love cats!

dislikes: i hate large crowds, being in public, the heat/hot weather, unfamiliar situations, when my anxiety gets the best of me, when people do something better than i do, or when people have stuff that i don't (i have a huge case of FOMO lol). i also dislike many foods, like tomatoes, onions, mushrooms, cucumbers, peppers, etc. i dislike dogs, unbehaved kids, and being told "no" LOL.. 😅

hobbies: so, yeah, i like writing, reading, drawing, swimming, singing, shopping, i also like hiking, doing my makeup, watching anime or tv, playing video games, snuggling with my cats, etc. idk, i'm kinda boring and don't talk about myself much 🤣

love languages:

giving: i love to make my partner feel appreciated. so acts of service, physical touch, and words of affirmation are my favorites to do.

receiving: i love physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, and quality time!

what i look for in a relationship: i look for someone i can bond with, ultimately! someone who likes the same stuff as i do, someone who laughs at my dumb jokes and who i can make inside jokes with, someone who is always there for me and is loyal, someone who wouldn't hesitate to stand up for me. someone who loves me unconditionally!

characters i don't like/don't want: i don't really vibe with lucifer, mammon, belphie, mephistopheles, thirteen or rafael. anyone else is fine (excluding luke obvi)!

thanks for reading! i hope i did this correctly, lol! 🧡🧡🧡

Thank you for your letter! ♡

Your matchup is...

Leviathan!

❥ This one was pretty much a given for me since he perfectly fits your criteria and you two have plenty of interests to bond over! Honestly, the closest runner up that I could think of was Solomon simply because we know he’s a bit of a nerd too and he’ll definitely approach you first, but I think that Levi fits your criteria better. He likes the same stuff that you do, like anime of course, but also gaming and collecting things. I mean come on, he probably has a ton of Ruri chan figurines and Pop figures. He seems like the type to collect funko pops anyways.

❥ I just feel like in terms of interests, you would have more to bond over with Levi than Solomon because yes Sol is a nerd, but he’s not as much of a nerd as Levi. And I also think that you fit Levi’s criteria too because he would look for someone who shares the same interests as he does. He’s used to other people around him tuning out his TSL rants or not having anyone to play with, so he just wants a Player 2. He wants someone who will understand him and someone who is just as engrossed in anime as he is! And with you, he wouldn’t have to worry about being some “yucky otaku” because you’ll be interested in the same things he is.

❥ I also think that you’re perfect for him because you don’t enjoy crowded places/like to hang at home just like him. I feel like he’d get too overwhelmed with a partner who forces him to go out too much.

❥ I do think that you two would have to be put in a situation where you’re “forced” to talk to each other in order to get closer or Levi will talk to you first. You’re both pretty quiet at first and it takes a little while for you guys to warm up to people, so this wouldn’t be a connection that sparks immediately. You two would either be home alone when there’s no wifi or you guys would be paired up for chores or an assignment. Whatever the circumstance was, it led to the two of you getting much closer!

❥ I think Levi would enjoy the new side of you that’s brought out once you warm up to him— your funny and blunt side. It’ll be fun for him, especially when you’re blunt or sassy with Mammon! He would honestly make fun of Mammon with you and would be the type who you share inside jokes with. Whenever Mammon pulls a ridiculous stunt or gets in trouble for putting Lucifer’s bank account in negatives, he’ll nudge you and give you the look. It’ll be like dating your best friend because he sees you as both his best friend and his wonderful partner. It’s like a 2-in-1 package for him!

❥ I could honestly see either of you confessing but Levi would probably confess after a while if you don’t tell him first.

❥ I could definitely see him inviting you over for game or anime nights in his room but I could also see him going to your room too since you have a bunch of gaming equipment as well! I also feel like he’d love to watch AOT with you and he’d pride himself in the fact that he shares the same name as humanity’s strongest soldier. He would probably want to cosplay Levi but he might be a bit scared to show you, so please encourage him!

❥ This man is literally a sea monster so he’ll go swimming with you! And he also loves to shop (online!) so you best bet he’ll buy things for you! I definitely think that he’ll be super shy at the beginning of the relationship. I feel like he’s had little to no relationship experience prior to you so he’ll be a bit awkward at first, but he really wants to be a good boyfriend!

❥ When he gets over the initial jitters at the beginning of the relationship, he’ll give you the physical touch you want! He’ll be shy to give it to you in public but when it’s just you two in his room, he’ll be all cuddles. He’ll have you on his lap while he games or spoon you (though I think he likes to be little spoon!). He strikes me as the type who also likes quality time so he’ll want to spend time with you often. It doesn’t matter if you’re doing something together or not as long as you’re next to him.

❥ Also a final note, I know you said that you get possessive over what's yours and I’m not sure if this includes partners, but if it does, Levi would love it. Levi is literally the avatar of envy so it’s not news to anyone that he’s insecure of his own worth and capabilities. He often compares himself to others because he doesn’t know his worth, and I think that he’d be insecure in a relationship. I think he’d be the most insecure at the beginning of the relationship because he questions if he can be a good boyfriend and feels like you’ll leave him for someone “better.” Over time, I think he’d become more comfortable and secure in the relationship but your possessiveness will make him feel loved and wanted. You also said before that you like to make your partner feel appreciated through acts of service, physical touch, and words and I think this would help Levi!

[thatgayb1tchwhosimps4her]

'Natalie' episode (17x6 re-write)

CW: Descriptions of abuse/borderline torture, past mentions/talks of an abusive childhood, Nat gets shot/stabbed/beaten, violence, vivid descriptions of hurting someone, just typical-ish CM bullshit (ish??).

Word Count: 4170 (longest thing I think I've ever written).

A/N: The time between the first point below (I'm changing it, so that Emily slept over in her office, and didn't know she was suspended until the morning), to Natalie being found, I've written as roughly 12 hours (7am to 7pm), and changed the bit under this to Emily finding the video on her work computer, after coming in first thing (Nat being taken about half an hour prior; 6:30am).

~~~

Okay, so a little change to the end of 17x5, of the reason Emily was staying late/crying to Rossi, which (in this AU) was because she got sent a short video of an unconscious Natalie, with a small gash to her forehead (just above her eyebrow) chained to a cement pillar in what looks like (and is) a basement.

Then the beginning of 17x6 (again, in this AU), it opens up with the team in the briefing room, about an hour after that (in the show's timeline), and Garcia comes in while the others are discussing amongst themselves (basically just frantically asking Emily if there was anyone out there who would want to hurt either of them (from Emily's past or Nat's).

Which she denies, and Penelope puts on the big screen some sped-up CCTV footage she found (through tracking Nat's phone) of her waiting at a coach/bus stop, before someone (dressed in all-black, with the hood of their hoodie pulled up, as well as a mask, so they can't be identified) comes up behind Nat, and japs a needle into her shoulder (through her Spider-Man suit that she's cosplaying in), then drags her away into some van.

With Emily's input, they deduct that despite hers and Natalie's previous conversation about it a few days before, Nat took it upon herself to sneak out early, and (try to) go to a Comic Con in Richmond, by herself, after Emily said 'no' (yk, cause teenage rebellion/mistakes pair well with angst, n'shit); cue title screen.

After the title screen, it shows Nat coming around from being unconscious, and calls out to whoever was there, asking what they want, then guy 1 (Connor) comes down to the basement, and doesn't say anything to Nat (while she continues to ask questions), 'til she says that her mom (Emily) can help them out.

That makes something inside him snap, and in a short fit of jealously, he back-hands her, and rants to her, all like "So what, you think you're better than me now, cause you have your perfect little life?" which throws Nat a little bit, cause huh??

And in realising he probably shouldn't of said that, he sorta clams back up again, and retreats back up the stairs, while Nat calls out to him; again, asking who he is, + what happened.

It then pans back to the BAU, and JJ (who Emily put in charge to take over for her until she's un-suspended. plus, also since the case is personal, Emily has to be treated as a family member, instead of an agent, regardless of said suspension) devising the labour of who's gonna do what to find Nat.

Penelope gets put in charge of finding out where the van went, who owns it, and any other information she can find out about wherever it does end up (as well as being on hand for finding out other info for the team, as per usual).

Tara and Luke go to scout out the coach stop Natalie was taken from, as well as go to her(s and Henry's) school, to see if anyone had noticed anybody hanging around there, or paying special attention to her if there was.

Rossi goes to Emily's house to talk to the neighbours, (again, to see if anyone shady had been hanging around) to try and piece together some sort of timeline of when she got home from school (after volleyball practice), what time she "snuck" back out again, etc, and to also look for any clues inside the house (like at any of Natalie's old records and stuff that Emily'd kept).

While JJ stayed back at the office with Emily, to talk her through everything and try to get any other useful information out of her (breaking out the old media liaison skills).

---

Back to Natalie, when guy 2 comes down to the basement (Max), and she decides to try a different tactic of shutting up and just observing him; trying to remember everything Emily taught her, in case of a situation like this.

Which (unluckily for poor Nat) doesn't end up working, and he gets easily frustrated, and lashes out at her, cause she's not co-operating; punching and hitting her a few times, before going back upstairs again, and once he shut the door (and locked it) Nat starts quietly counting aloud.

To the team again, and to Tara and Luke on the street of where Nat got dragged off of, where they basically just assess how easy it'd be to take someone (especially under the cover of early-ish morning darkness), but ultimately not getting much from it, before heading to the school.

Pan back to Natalie, who's still counting (getting to 3,600 a couple minutes before the key turns in the lock of the basement door), then fakes being zoned out/unresponsive, to try and play it the smartest way she knows for near-certainty she can.

Then to JJ and Emily back at the office, who're sat next to each other in Emily's office, (assumedly) previously trying to talk through things that could be useful, but moving away from it, cause Emily starts panicking (and rightfully so), and JJ helps calm her down before it gets too bad, and they end up talking about BAU-gate and such (because they brushed it under the carpet so quickly in the actual episode), but end up being okay.

To Natalie again, where she's actually zoned out this time (like Derek in his episode), assumedly after another visit from guy number 2, since there's scratch marks on her face. And her like "mental safe-place" is basically just a bunch memories with Henry and her mom, from different things.

Back to Tara and Luke at the school, talking to the principle in the hallway outside of her office, just asking basic questions which don't require that much privacy.

But, of course, with it being the break-thing between the second-to-last and last class of the day, who more convenient to see them than Henry himself? Obviously, alarm bells go off in his head, cause he texted her twice and she hasn't responded to either, and now agents are at their school, asking questions.... "Where is she?" He asked, before they could come up with an excuse.

---

Then back to Natalie again, (and again, assumedly after another visit from guy number 2 + 1, so we're at about hour 7), and they both come down this time, Max with a gun in his hand (who would rather just get straight down to business, then fuck around trying to talk to Nat) and shoots her in left knee, immediately blinding her with pain and pulling her from the safe-place, making her cry out and whimper softly, her hands flexing around the cuffs and trying to control her breathing, to do her best to regulate the pain.

And guy 2 is all like "Wow, you really have forgotten us, huh?" Again, she's confused as fuck; being given mixed signals the entire time she'd been there, n'all that. So she tries to get them to talk to her, so she can try and help, but obviously they aren't having any of it, and leave her to sit with her pain; guy 1 looking apologetically at Nat on the way out.

It then goes to Rossi at the house, looking around (mostly in Nat's room, cause the rest of their place is pretty normal) and looking for clues (which ends up being like a sad sort of scene; Dave just being there in her room, kinda getting hit with the possibility it could remain empty forever), but he ultimately comes up with nothing, too, so just ends up grabbing the boxes Emily told him about, and loading them into the SUV.

Over to Nat again, (I'm putting this at about half an hour later) and she's struggling against the cuffs, her wrists red-raw, a look of doubt and "would it be crazy of me to do this?" crosses her face, before she mutters a small "Fuck it." and hits the thumb on her left hand against the corner of the pillar, causing her to bite down on her bottom lip, to muffle her screams as best she could.

Then does that a few more times to dislocate it, and pulls that hand out of the cuffs, looking down at it, with a few stray tears falling down her cheeks, before taking a deep breath, and resting it on the ground next to her (cause the cement would be cold, since it's a basement), which makes her wince slightly.

After a few minutes (we're at 40/60 minutes now), she goes pops it back in the best she can, and makes herself gag by doing so (honestly same, as I'm writing this), and tries to keep it as still as possible afterwards.

To the BAU now (it's about 4pm), and Tara, Luke, and Rossi all go into the bullpen at the same kind of time, to like regroup (plus Henry) and JJ's like "Wait, why is my kid here-? Ohhh", and they've pretty much come up with nothing, so back to the drawing board/going through the boxes Rossi brought back.

A little bit after that (at 45 minutes; 15 'til one or both of the guys come back down), she avoids using her left hand when ripping the bottom half of her suit-covered thigh, on that same side (where she got shot), to see how bad it is/figure out how to try not to bleed-out (which again, makes her gag).

She then pulls off one of her socks that's over the top of the suit's left foot (the guys took her shoes so she wouldn't/couldn't run if she escaped), and used it as a make-shift bandage, tying it really tightly around her knee.

The two of them then come back down again; giving Natalie just enough time to sit back, and hold onto the handcuffs a certain way, so it doesn't look any different; pretending to "zone out" again, but wanting to eavesdrop(??) on what they're talking about, cause she still doesn't know wtf is doing on (hour 8/12).

They get to about half an hour of talking (and throwing a couple punches, here and there), before realising that they're not gonna be able to get through to her this way, then walk a few steps away from her, and turn away to discuss in "private".

Thinking that she's still in that "safe-place head-space" (even after being shot), they don't hush their voices, and just talk it out; "You know, I don't know why we even bothered with this? She clearly doesn't remember, or she's moved on/is happy." -C "Don't be stupid. We're doing this for revenge, remember? Besides, the only way we could get anything out of her, without beating her nearly to death, would be to mess with that boyfriend of hers, and doing this has already gotten messy enough." -M.

And that sets Natalie *off*, because what the actual flying fucking fuck??! "What beef do they have with Henry? Wait, what beef do they have with me? Revenge??", and without thinking, she just snaps, breaking away from holding onto the cuffs, then instead just starts battering the shit out of them (ignoring the pain in her thumb); screaming at them "Where is he?!! What did you do to him??! I swear to God, if you touch him, I'll kill you!!" Which is the most she's interacted with them (with words) the whole time.

Which, during her rage, she ends up just beating up the first guy (Connor), and gets like distracted, so the second guy manages to get back up, before pulling out a pocket knife, and stabbing Natalie smack-bang in the middle of her stomach, just above the centre of her pelvis (nicking her ovaries slightly 😬 which is kinda important for later), and that obviously catches her off-guard.

Then guy 2 basically drags guy 1 away, and helps him back up the stairs, after Nat like falls back/down, keeping herself propped up on her elbow (at 8 hours 40-ish minutes now), her face pretty much drowning in panic and fear.

---

And now we go back to the BAU, with all of the team (excluding Emily, as well as Henry, who are just kind of sat/stood in the corner), each of them (Tara, Luke, Dave, and JJ) looking through a box each to try and find a clue.

They end up being interrupted by Garcia, who comes in with her laptop and (after some PG-level digging) informs them about what she found out about Nat's old foster/adoptive parents - They had several cases of abuse filed against them, when other kids they were looking after got past the age of 18 (now 9 hours).

The team discusses this for a bit, then decide it's a good lead (as well as the only viable one they've got). Penelope then sifts through the handful of names of the people who launched a case against the foster parents, and sorts through the names of the ones that're still going on (which is most of them), before finding the two who are closest in age to Natalie; Connor and Max.

Back to Nat again, and she wakes up from being passed out (for about another hour, since guy 1 also had another needle on hand, with the stuff he used the first time, to keep her unconscious while they took her to the house), then pulls herself to sit up against the stairs (the whole hourly check thing from the guys going out the window, since it's probably taken them a while for guy 2 to clean guy 1 up, and to devise a new plan of action).

She gets up, pulls her arms out from the sleeves of her suit and ties them as tightly as possible around her to slow the bleeding (double + triple knotting them), then looks over at the pool of blood next to her, and gets an idea (dun dun dun....).

Cut to like a montage(??) of Natalie using her blood to mark fake footprints "walking" to a closet in the corner of the basement, before unzipping the foot pieces of the suit (cause apparently you can get ones that do that 🤷🏻), chucking them inside, and closing the doors (not before grabbing a baseball bat out of it).

To the team again, with all of them walking out of the bullpen (Garcia breaking off to go back to her "bat-cave"), and Henry argues with JJ that he's going with them (and he won't take no for an answer), they go back and forth on it, 'til they compromise on him staying in the car with Emily, and waiting for the medics.

Then down to the like "changing room" to put their FBI vests on, and JJ, Tara, Luke and Rossi going over the game-plan; JJ and Rossi will go around back to check the downstairs, and Tara and Luke will go through the front to check upstairs, along with a few of the local detectives, cause why not (it's also 10 and a half hours, now).

---

To Natalie again, and both of them unlock the basement (11 hours now), the camera in my head filming their shoes walking down the stairs, before focusing in on Nat behind hidden behind two of them, the light catching her eyes between two of the steps at just the right angle (scary + cool as fuck!!), and they obviously see the pool of blood, then the footprints, and follow them (idiots).

Then guy 1 + 2 open the closet expecting to see Nat inside, only to be baffled, before she appears behind them, and strikes guy 1 (C) over the back of the head; hard (who then collapses onto the ground, basically killing him on impact). And she looks extremely psychotic (cause she thinks they've got Henry, since she doesn't know any of what's been happening outside that room).

Pan back to the team in the car (JJ, Emily, and Henry in one - Tara, Luke, and Rossi in the other) on the way to where the old foster home is, since that's the most likely place they'd take her (also cause they tried the shelter they were being housed in, for kids who used to be in care), while on the phone with Garcia, who's filling them in on their past; basically just that they're foster brothers (22 and 25), who grew up in the same house as Natalie, before CPS found out the parents abusing them, + Emily then adopted her. (N was 0-6, C was 6-12, and M was 9-15).

Before guy 2 (M) can do anything to react to that, Natalie takes a swing at him, hitting the bat into his right side, which knocks him into the corner of the room. She then goes over (kind of hobbling) after he quickly gets himself out of the corner, and has time to hit him again (in the knee) since he's kind of panicking, then makes a snide remark of "Oh, what, you're not into that?" when he cries out/curses in pain, and doubles over slightly, of course referring to him shooting her knee.

She then pulls both her arms back (holding onto the bat), and swings it forward with such force against his left side, it cracks several of his ribs, causing him to stumble backwards into the wall opposite the stairs, before getting all up in his space like "Right, I'm giving you one last chance to tell me where he is."

Which, obviously, he doesn't take (since he's like the 'cocky' one out of him and Connor), so Nat kinda mocks him, and sticks her bottom lip out slightly; "No? That's a shame. Actually, no it's not; you'll regret not saying 'yes', though." BAM! Another hit, this time a wide shot to the pelvis (mostly his junk) - 11 and a half.

Cut back to the team, pulling up in the huge driveway outside; a few squad cars from the local PD following behind them. JJ gets out first, reiterating that Emily and Henry have to stay in the car (which they do), before shouting out orders to the others; "Luke, Tara, you take the front and check upstairs. Rossi, you're with me, we're going through the back, and sweeping the downstairs. You find either of the boys, or Nat, regardless of condition, you use COMMs, or shout-out, as soon as you can; am I clear?"

Back in the basement, Nat's discarded the bat at this point. Guy 2 is on the floor, she's kicking the shit out of him with her bad leg (no matter how much it hurts, she's determined to get an answer out of him), and uses the good one to keep herself from falling over, while screaming at him again; "You son of a bitch! Tell me what the fuck you did! WHERE IS HE??!"

Kick, kick, kick; he's coughing up blood now, but Natalie's too far gone/insanely focused on the task at hand to really notice. Max's half-pleaded at her to stop, but Nat's not stupid; the second she stops, he'll fight back, and she can't afford to do that.

After the team and most of the officers disappear around the house's perimeter, Emily sneaks out of the car, and grabs a radio that's sitting carelessly on the trunk of one of the officer's cars, then tunes in into the channel that the COMMs are, just as the medics pull up.

Natalie gives up on kicking, and pretty much falls onto her knees (almost desensitized to the throbbing in her left one), opting to punching him instead, since he's basically unconscious, but surely she can still get something out of him, right??

JJ and Luke count down on COMMs, both of them at their appointed entrances to the house, and bust down the front and back door at the same time.

She then sluggishly moves to straddle guy 2's chest (he's basically dead by now), wearily pulling her arms back, and landing weak punches to alternating sides of his face, giving up on screaming, and whispering instead; "Where is he? Please, jus- Just tell me where he is? I can't let him be hurt."

Tara and Luke immediately fan out, checking the hallway, before rushing upstairs, and taking an end of the hallway each. Rossi going in first at the back of the house; clearing the kitchen, then the dining room, and heading to look at the rest of the house. JJ goes into the living room, looking around, then discover that there's a basement.

Nat's now sort of "coming around" to what she's done, and now feeling all the things (pain-wise), so takes herself off of guy 2, and falls back like 5 feet away from him, onto her back; the blood-loss now really getting to her, as she suddenly gets hit with the full effect of her drowsiness, just as JJ comes down the stairs.

---

"Guys, I need back-up." Is heard through the COMMs (as well as the radio Emily acquired, and it listening to, by one of the ambulances). "I'm in the basement, south-west side of the house. I've found Nat, she- We've got bodies down here." JJ's voice is strained, trying to keep her emotions in check.

Hearing that, Emily clicks off of the channel, and just breaks down; falling on her knees, just sobbing uncontrollably into her hands. Her heart feeling like it's physically broken inside her chest, until a hand rests on her shoulder, a few minutes later; it's familiar, comforting. And it belongs to Rossi.

"Hey, hey- Easy. Come here-" He comforts, helping her stand back up, before hugging her tightly (for the second time that day), waiting for her to regulate her breathing again, before speaking. "It's gonna be alright, I promise."

Which makes Emily pissed, because "No, it won't." She thought. Her baby girl is dead, how will it every be o-

Her spiralling thoughts cut off by not one, but two, body bags being rolled out of the house, and passed the pair, into an M.E's van, because they got there at some point. She nearly breaks again, before seeing a third stretcher being pushed towards them; is that-?

It passes them, and is loaded into the ambulance, just as Henry jumps out of the SUV, and JJ comes over to them. "She's lost a lot of blood, but there's a good chance she'll be okay." The blonde stated, cutting to the point, before any of them can ask.

"What did they do to her?" Is Emily's first question, pushing her prior thoughts and feelings to the back of her mind. "I'm not sure, but she's got some marks on her face, and she's covered in blood. I think-" JJ pauses for a second, looking to Henry, who's face is a mix of anger and desperation for answers.

"One of them shot her, in the knee. She's got a stab wound, too; near the bottom of her stomach, almost dead-centre." She manages to get out, before Emily rushes to the ambulance, climbing in without a second thought; gently taking a hold of Natalie's left hand (painted in deep blues and purples) in hers. "Oh honey, what did they do to you?" She whispered, running her thumb over the back of it, before pressing a soft kiss to her palm.

"We'll follow behind." She heard Rossi say; 'we' implying him, JJ, and Henry, which she acknowledged with a small nod, a few moments before the ambulance doors got shut.

---

"Mama?" A small voice spoke, about 10 minutes later. Emily lifted her head up to look toward it; her previously life-less daughter, now squinting in her direction.

"Hi- Hey, it's okay." Emily perks up, sniffing softly, as she moves her other hand to stroke her thumb over Nat's forehead. "We're gonna be at the hospital in a little bit. Then they're gonna mend you all up, and I'll never let anything bad happen to you ever; I swear to you."

"Mama." The voice repeats, a small smile visible under the oxygen mask, before tears well up in her eyes, and she whimpers softly. "I'm sorry. I just wanted to be independent for once, and do something fun, but I should've listened to you."

"Hey, hey, hey- I'm not angry with you, I promise. None of this is your fault; I've got you." Emily reassures, gently wiping the tears from her daughter's cheeks, before smiling and whispering softly. "Hey- You were really brave, you know that? I am so so proud of you, ladybug; you did so good. You didn't stop for a second, and I am incredibly lucky to get to be the mom of such a badass, mi pequeño amour."

"Mommy-" The girl started, her voice raspy despite the mask, before her eyes drooped shut again, and the machine at the foot of the stretcher monitoring her vitals beeped loudly.

~~~

Hello, so as stated in the title, this was just my version of 17x6, cause it was the easiest of all the ones in that season to adapt to what I had in mind for this OC, but (without explicitly saying it in this post) I left in the 'It gives me you' bit, for during Emily and JJ's talk in Emily's office about everything, since it still kinda fit :)

And disclaimer; I don't know how easy it would be to dislocate + put back in place the thumb-joint, or know how realistic what I wrote would be/is (since I couldn't think of any other way to get Nat out of the cuffs, apart from the old Bobby/hair pin thing), but this is what I found when I googled it, so 🤷🏻

Again, for the angst, (at some point over this AU thingy) I'm gonna briefly give Nat a morphine addiction (from being prescribed it to cope after surgery) as like a Reid parallel, except actually be able to give work it out properly, unlike the Reid storyline, where it was just pretty much disposed of.

But I hope you guys liked it, despite the angst. (And yes, I will do a smaller part 2 to pick up from the end of this, which I will link here, and on the main page).

-Harlow

[alicepao13]

I forgot to add in my previous ask, but I wonder what makes them think that the show needs a revival? Bad rantings? Low viewership?

And what makes them think that Luke Roberts/Mark will do that for them, instead of bringing John Reardon/Charlie back? The character that fans and people already love and are invested in and has formed an attachment to? Like are they that stupid or do they simply not care about the creatives?

Getting rid of Charlie is as stupid as if they’d get rid of Rex… (once again, I wonder if they thought that because they lost Diesel as Rex, they thought it doesn’t matter what human partner he has and that it’s better to just “start over” with a new guy. Which is idiotic.)

I get that sometimes shows need a change or a boost, but switching out your lead character is seldom that and it very rarely brings an improvement or better outcome….

I forgot to add in my previous ask, but I wonder what makes them think that the show needs a revival? Bad rantings? Low viewership?

A combination of financial issues and John Reardon's illness from what I believe is the root, no matter what they will try to sell us. Bad ratings? As I said before, when you focus most of your time on Rex, if you get bad ratings, it's either time for the show to go or you'll have to place your focus elsewhere. They can claim they'll revitalize the show all they want but at least among themselves they know the truth.

And what makes them think that Luke Roberts/Mark will do that for them, instead of bringing John Reardon/Charlie back? The character that fans and people already love and are invested in and has formed an attachment to? Like are they that stupid or do they simply not care about the creatives?

They don't care a bit about anything to do with creativity, that much is obvious now. Any show that loses not just one but both leads in one season should have the dignity to recognize that this is the end of the line. Again, this is a product, and a product that has fully changed while its in denial about it is not a product that people will buy. In this case, consume as audience.

Getting rid of Charlie is as stupid as if they’d get rid of Rex… (once again, I wonder if they thought that because they lost Diesel as Rex, they thought it doesn’t matter what human partner he has and that it’s better to just “start over” with a new guy. Which is idiotic.)

I know this and you know this. They don't see it that way, though, and the won't because money.

I get that sometimes shows need a change or a boost, but switching out your lead character is seldom that and it very rarely brings an improvement or better outcome….

In a normal crime show, that would be a move that could be viable. In a show called Hudson and Rex where one of the characters is a dog and is supposed to be bonded with the human whose name is the title and they're not bringing him back... well, that's stupid. This isn't Kommissar Rex, they've never been close enough to the original for that move to work, not to mention that it's been years since the last Kommissar Rex was even successful.

[backjustforberena]

Hi! I've been enjoying reading your insights regarding the Velaryons, especially Rhaenys. I don't know if this has been asked already but if it hasn't been yet, please do rant about 'the juxtaposition of Corlys and Rhaenys at their daughter's wake and how it perfectly represents and underlines the divergence they are having in respect to legacy which leads onto their opposing positions in regards to succession.'

Hello! I assume you mean from this gifset? I would love to talk about it. And thank you for your compliments on my "insights", I really like having a ramble about these characters. It's fun, and escapism, and they occupy far too much of my headspace.

So, yes, the wake. I've done a bit of a meta, HERE, about it, and then a more in-depth look at specifically Rhaenys's movements during both the funeral and the wake HERE.

And I think my thoughts, just generally, about them as a couple during this whole entire episode, is that they are diverging and that ebbs and flows throughout and then you get the break of that relationship being the most visceral and violent event at the end, with Laenor's death and Rhaenys screaming and Corlys yelling. And that's what leads us into this six-year gap. They are ripped apart by this. It's the only thing that could have done so because the love and the marriage is pretty solid otherwise.

At the wake, obviously, both Rhaenys and Corlys are reacting to the same incident. The same trauma. The death of their daughter. But they each react in different ways which means they can't understand the other or even make room to try. They're at opposite ends of the spectrum and that is really new for them. It doesn't happen.

As I touched on, in the first meta I've linked to, they grasp onto their grandchildren as some sort of remedy. As some sort of answer. Both characters are fierce in their ideas of family and propelled by the love of their family but, in cases such as this, what that love amounts to is different.

For Corlys, it's the idea of legacy. So, he looks to Luke, who is to be his legacy as Lord of the Tides after Laenor. He tries to take comfort that, despite a major pillar of his love and family (and legacy) having been taken (Laena and an unborn grandchild dying in childbirth), all is not lost. All is not despair. Luke represents a future and a way out of this pain and grief. A brighter day and one, dare I say, that will absolve Corlys of any regrets at yoking his family to the Targaryen royals. It's a way of not facing his demons and not facing his culpability (however you want to look at that whether as illogical guilt, support of a match that meant Laena was away from them, his ambitions driving the family) in the situation he's in now.

I don't think it's any coincidence that he goes into familiar territory rather than looking at his granddaughters, who are basically living copies of the daughter that just died and are the last piece of his daughter. He's not engaging with the fact that they've lost Laena. He doesn't even do it in the following scene when Rhaenys wants to talk about Maesters. He fobs her off. For a man obsessed with legacy, he doesn't consider the legacy of his daughter specifically.

Whereas, looking at Rhaenys, all she can do is face the fact that her daughter is dead. Rhaenys is, in my opinion, light-years ahead of her husband in terms of the consequences of ambition. It's why she's the cautious one of the pair and why we only have them really, truly, on the same page about the Iron Throne in Episode 10 - because he's now been humbled by all this war and deaths and the cost. For Rhaenys, that sort of lesson has been burnt into her since the Great Council. So, she's painfully self-aware of her sins and the cruelty of the world, as opposed to Corlys who is a very accomplished man. Who does what he wants and very rarely gets burnt. I think Rhaenys is all too ready and willing to blame herself. To blame them.

And Rhaenys's view on legacy and priority on legacy has to be different to Corlys's. In part, because Rhaenys's legacy has been set for decades. What will she be remembered for, if not as "The Queen Who Never Was"? But also due to her sex. Her children do not have her last name. She has no holdings or land. Her name has every chance of being in a long list of Meleys's riders. Any title she could have passed on was stripped from her: her children are not even Prince or Princess. She has nothing to give that she cannot give day-to-day, during her lifetime, whilst she lives: her love, her body, her protection.

Corlys can cement his line, be remembered as grandfather to Kings, and leave behind a prosperous Driftmark with a secure succession of Velaryon after Velaryon, at least in name. His voyages and discoveries will be legend, his accomplishments will become myth, he will have victories and claim territories etc etc. He will be in the history books. He lives for legacy because legacy can be something to him. It can't be, for her. Any legacy as she would have liked it (Queen of the Seven Kingdoms) was taken from her long ago.

But back to Rhaenys and the loss of Laena, specifically... she can't deal with anything else. It's all she thinks about. All that motivates her, in this episode. There was even some cut dialogue during the knife scene (which I do agree on being taken out but nevertheless gives us insight) where, as Rhaenys and Corlys enter, she berates the room at large: on the day we buried our daughter (I'm paraphrasing). It's all about Laena and being unable to prevent Laena's death. It's self-reflection on her own actions or inactions.

Of course she's going to prioritise blood because that is the only thing she has to care about. She's going to prioritise Laena's legacy. Not Corlys's. Not her own. Laena's. Because those girls are all that is left of her daughter. She's going to protect those girls with everything she has and give them all she can and atone. Giving those girls a happy life and keeping them close and keeping them safe is the only thing even remotely within her control. It's also a way of fulfilling her daughter's wishes.

But, as we see in the fireside scene, it becomes about choosing. To elevate Baela (which is a massive thing to do, like I cannot emphasise enough how out of line Rhaenys was with that suggestion), you cast a shadow on the boys. You just do, without meaning to. So it becomes an argument, rather than a conversation because that threatens what Corlys is trying to find solace in - the communication goes out of the window. And that whole conversation spirals because they are just grieving parents looking to different things to make them feel okay again.

But I'll stop rambling there. It's just layered.

[bohemian-nights]

When people say Daemon and Nettles had a father-daughter relationship and/or he was her biological father I get so confused 😐. Nettles was born in 113 AC (on Driftmark) at this time Daemom was ruiling the Bloodstone as "King of the Stepstones and the Narrow Sea" in the Stepstones. He had been doing this since his exile by Viserys in 111 AC. He doesn't return to Driftmark until 115 AC. This would make Nettles already two years old. So i’m not sure what health class these particular fans claiming this attended….but that’s simply impossible in every way, shape, and form.

That being said, book wise we don’t get any particular information about Daemon’s relationship with his children. That’s not to say that he was a bad father or that he didn’t love them, rather we just don’t have any indication that fatherhood changed him. And show wise Daemons relationship with his daughters is unfortunately very strained to say the least. Aegon III and Viserys II are babies and we’ve seen him interact with them only once. The same thing can be said for Jace, Luke, and Joffrey.

So we can’t say his actions toward Nettles were fatherly when we have no indication of how he supposedly acts when he’s being “fatherly.”

(Sorry for ranting)

You are more than welcome to rant all day 😊

At this point I’m convinced people either haven’t read the book like they say they have or they skipped over Nettles parts because it triggered them 🤷🏽‍♀️ She’s not his kid and no amount of saying she could be his daughter will change the impossibility of that being the case.

Yeah, we don’t get any parenting info on book! Daemon other than him being okay with Baela being a bit of a wild child. I think he’s better than his show counterpart though because he’s not separating his kids and there is no mentions of them being treated unequally.

Baela in the show writes to Daemon on Driftmark(from what I remember, someone correct me if I’m wrong cause I’m not rewatching that trash), but he is pretty much a deadbeat💀

This man has been a father to no one and if people think he’s going to suddenly be a surrogate father to Nettles then they are smoking crack. If they were going to do the father-daughter plot Nettles would be scrapped and replaced with Rhaena(which is what they are hoping for despite it not making any sense and basically mean having to rework the story).

There is nothing fatherly about bathing with a young woman butt naked, but they are more than welcome to explain how Corlys bathing naked with Rhaenyra would be 100% platonic father/daughter-in-law bonding time 🙃

[deeptrashwitch]

So...I was looking around tumblr as usual while listening music. And since is already december, in my country (not sure if it's the same on others) it's usual to hear the damn songs tipical of this month OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

And yeah, it would be tolerable at least if THEY WEREN'T PLAYING THEM SINCE FUCKING SEPTEMBER!

Just why? It is enough hearing it non-stop during december, hell, I would even feel it was fun if it was only since november. But no...four months. FOUR GODDAMNED MONTHS HEARING THIS! And it doesn't help that my neighbor decide to play them at 3 am.

Let me die already...

So yeah, for now let's leave behind the fact that I'm about to throw my dad's stereo through a window and wanted to rant a bit. I was thinking about my boys (lost the inspiration for the main story, sorry) and how they'll be during christmas or most likely in this situation.

So here they are!

-------------------------------------------------------

Alicia was about to loose her cool.

It was november and even if she loved the holidays, there was a problem. She didn't know who told Marcus about certain songs and whoever did it, now he was a dead man walking. Don't misunderstand her...she loved those songs during Christmas and New Years, they were basically a tradition on her house, but HOLY HELL if she wasn't tired of them.

Why? May you ask

BECAUSE MARCUS HAS PLAYED THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS SINCE FUCKING JUNE!

And now Edward started to sing them without knowing what the hell they meant it was nothing bad tho or how to pronounce it and the pilot wasn't the best singer either.

-Alicia?-asked Luke when he saw her staring to the void as other round of those songs started

-I am THIS close to commit a murder inside here-hissed as her eyebrow twitched

-Your...your fingers are touching

-Exactly! God forgive me if I find who told Marcus to play this over and over

Luke didn't say anything, but he knew exactly who was it and never expected their Captain would react like this. He decided to keep quiet for now...for his own sake. That was like that until end of december and Alicia was going crazy.

At least until Wraith decided to watch the world burn and she told the Captain who was it. She didn't know if laugh or cry of the pure anger, but took a deep breath before looking at Dominique with a little smile.

-How bad can I leave them?-asked as her eyebrow twitched again

-Leave Jackson alone, you know the poor bastard has been busy with some of your own wounds during training

-Fair enough

Alicia got out of Dominique's office and found Elijah first, who salute her with a smile. She was alright with him and most of her team, so she just started chatting with him a bit as he told her about christmas in his house.

-So you started to dance...while drunk?-asked with a smile

-Never drink vodka, whisky and rum together I guess

-Good point, oh, by the way, have you seen Luke, Noah and Alexander anywhere?

-Uhh, last time I saw them, they were on the yard

-Great, thanks Elijah

-I just need to ask but, do I need to tell Jackson to prepare the bay?-asked a bit nervous

-Nah, hmm, but I told Luke what would happen if I found out...

-Yep, I'll tell him just in case

And so, once Alicia let Elijah go, he went straight to the medic bay to talk with the blonde SEAL. Blackwell just sighed and prepares everything to cure those three idiots once the Captain finished with them. They both went and found the rest of the team and went just to contemplate the spectacle, even Wraith was watching from her office.

Soon they saw the three soon-to-die soldiers talk as they walked and then Elliot saw the Captain. Everyone had a chill down their spine when they saw the smile in her face and, for worse, the broomstick on her hands. Once the Lieutenant, the Corporal and the Private noticed her...all of them went pale as wax.

-Oh crap, she found out-said Alexander shaking

-No shit, Sherlock!-snapped Noah in his direction before they started running

-¡PEQUEÑAS MIERDAS! ¡TRAIGAN SU TRASERO AQUÍ! (YOU LITTLE SHITS! BRING YOUR ASSES HERE!)-screamed Alicia in spanish chasing them with her eyes filled of anger-¡SEIS MESES! ¡SEIS MALDITOS MESES! ¡CASI ME VUELVO LOCA POR SU CULPA! (SIX MONTHS! SIX FUCKING MONTHS! I ALMOST WENT CRAZY BECAUSE OF YOU!)

The woman chased them screaming for almost an hour before she could smack the broom on something, the floor if we are being specific, before looking them directly to the eyes. All three of them just watched with a mix of awe and fear how the broomstick was broken in thousands of pieces, then she just whispered "run" and they fled for their lives. Alicia smiled as she used the broken stick as a javelin, missing for mere inches the back of Luke's head.

-Is she trying to murder them for real or...?-asked Francis surprised

-I...don't think so-muttered Nicholas raising an eyebrow

Once they lost sight of the three, Alicia started to laugh and that just terrified her team before she picked the broomstick pieces. She walked towards them before throw the pices in the trash and smiled them as usual.

-What?

-You are scary, ma'am-said Marcus almost laughing of incredulity-you almost killed the Lieutenant!

-Of course not!-answered as she laughed again-I never aimed to his head! If I did...well you know what would have happened

-How?-asked Edward as the woman shuggred

-Not the first time I chase someone and throw them something, that's the way I usually stop my siblings of stealing my things

-So what was the point?-asked Jackson with a smile

-Scare them enough to leave me alone for a while and NEVER suggest Marcus to do that again, because I know pretty well they told him they were different songs when I told him to stop every time-murmured the Captain with a sigh-and they'll have bathroom duty for two months, yes, even Luke

-Poor them-said Elijah with a giggle

-You're kidding? This was the funniest shit I've seen since a long time-said Elliot wheezing-oh God...why didn't I record it?

-I'm sure Wraith did-said Alicia before stretching a bit-alright people, drinks are on me today! For New Year!

All of them cheered once they heard that, and decided to go to one of the city bars before midnight, when they'll call their family on their own.

-And someone find those three for God's sake!

[shrinkthisviolet]

☕️ on Ace Attorney (Original Trilogy vs Apollo Justice Trilogy)

Ooh this is an interesting one! Honestly, I think we can all agree that the OT was perfect, not much to say there…but I know Apollo Justice tends to be more controversial. I honestly hesitate to call it a trilogy, but…one thing at a time, let’s start with AA4 (aka my favorite of the three):

Here’s my hot take: Phoenix isn’t the issue. The game has its flaws, but Phoenix being more jaded makes sense (and he still has a brightness within him with Trucy). “But Lavi, you don’t like TLJ Luke for exactly the same reason,” yes, I hear you, but although Phoenix and Luke are very similar, the circumstances of their hermit era are different. Luke leaves his family to exile himself after a brief moment of contemplating murder against his nephew, instead of fighting the First Order (after he saw how dangerous and destructive the Empire was??). Phoenix loses the position he worked so hard towards and is then manipulated by Kristoph for 7 years, during which he still comes up with a plan to fight back in secret! Different circumstances…but I digress. Back to the main point: the issue is not Phoenix.

The game’s big issue is actually with Apollo: he’s so sidelined compared to Phoenix that it’s unfair to him. Like…forget not winning a case on his own (because Phoenix had that issue in AA1 too): his game isn’t even really about him! It’s all about Phoenix! Which, for a game meant to introduce Apollo, is bizarre. AA5 and AA6 (mainly AA6) do a better job of introducing Apollo than AA4, which is a shame. He feels like a plot device in his own intro game, and he deserves better than that.

The other issue is more to do with AA5. That game resets the status quo so much that it weakens AA4 in retrospect…which imo is part of why AA4 is so disliked. Phoenix is a lawyer again, and back to his OT self (no seriously, it’s actually kinda jarring), there’s another new lawyer in Athena (who gets a much better intro in this game than Apollo did in AA4).

Also, this game was “OT Cameo Central” with brief appearances from Trucy, Klavier, and Pearl (Maya was AA6 iirc). And oh, do I mean brief. It’s actually annoying, particularly with Trucy, because…these are supposed to be three of the most important characters in Ace Attorney, with Trucy especially as Phoenix's daughter! Why is she so sidelined?? Why is Klavier sidelined, when he’s Apollo’s most meaningful opposition and a great narrative foil to him in AA4?? (Why don’t we see his reaction to Apollo going all Kristoph-esque in the finale in DD? Feels like something he’d have strong reactions to, hmm?)

AA6 I actually preferred over AA5, but…even then, as I was playing, I just went “wow, after three games, we finally know something about Apollo other than his work life and his post-death-mentioned best friend” 🤦‍♀️

Honestly the more I think about it…this isn’t really a trilogy. I like parts of each game, but…it’s not coherent in the same way the OT was, and it’s not even entirely focused on Apollo the way the OT was entirely focused on Phoenix. It’s more of a beautiful mess, in a sense.

(Hey also can we talk about how messed up it is that Apollo and Trucy still don’t know they’re siblings?? Because that’s messed up, right?? Phoenix found out in AA4 and he still hasn’t told them?? And if he has, why tf didn’t we see that??)

Send me “☕️” and (optionally) a topic, and I’ll talk about it!

[still-a-morosexual-help]

I really really hope you're right, this just killed my motivation for everything. What happened with Solomare's story jar already left a bad taste in my mouth too.

I know I'll feel better in a few days, but I felt lied to when they said they'd continue the story and the app. And it's going to be even lighter and fluffier and a replacement for the main story line? One that new players will perfectly fit into? I was so looking forward to learning more about what would happen to Simeon.

Also not announcing it until last minute? For once I'm really glad I can barely afford food, because I'd be devastated if I had spent even a dollar. But maybe that's just me being poor.

I'm mostly likely going to stop writing for a while until I've archived everything important from the app, which is gonna take ages just in case anyway.

But anyway, are there any recent events you thought were better than usual? I've been too sick to grind lately so I haven't unlocked them. I want to know which ones to archive as soon as possible once the six months are up.

Sorry for bringing the mood down and the rant, but you seem to be the only positive one I follow that isn't outright calling people stupid or pathetic for being upset so I'm really hoping your positivity rubs off on me.

I do hope you keep posting for Nightbringer too! I have several issues with my hands so I don't think I'll ever be able to see the end of the og story line, and I especially love your analyses out of anyone else's.

Okay okay so they are continuing the og app and continuing the story, the only difference is they'll be continuing the mainstory in nightbringer and the og app will just be getting events. So the og app will continue the way it has since the end of s4 and new main story content will be uploaded to nightbringer (the devs did says this)

Not sure what happened with story jar but Obey Me! is solmare's most popular game. Objectively, nothing solmare has created has ever come near to reaching om! And I'm talking purely in the money making side of it - the anime? mangas? songs? merch? cons? VAs getting heavily involved in everything? Solmare's a business. As long as there's a fandom and a demand for it they're not gonna kill the og app.

Plus the majority of om's content is on the og app, with new content and old events still being released. If they wanted to kill the og app they'd stop releasing new content and updating lonely devil.

Since nightbringer will be continuing the mainstory from where they left off, they'd also need to move all of S1-4 the chats, call & devilgrams to nightbringer if they were gonna kill the og - and I'd imagine that's more hassle than it's worth

I do think we'd learn more about what happened to simeon;

• devs said they'd be continuing the main story in nightbringer so that'd include simeon

• nightbringer's current plot is about time travel and mc trying to find a way back home - so they will end up back in the current time at some point, where simeon's whole thing can be addressed

• s3 established that luke wasn't alive when the brothers were angels. If they intended to keep mc in the past they'd either have to scrap luke's entire character (?????) or retcon s3 which so far dropped the most lore

• thirteen (who's supposed to turn into a LI)'s first visit to the devildom happens in s4 and in nightbringer's op we see her in Diavolo's castle. Which means we're seeing the present timeline as well

....i think you're maybe panicking a bit too much? You definitely don't need to archive anything anytime soon. For well all of the reasons I mentioned above.... Maybe someday you'd have to but definitely not right now

Honestly I liked all the events🤷

No worries! And Yeah I think the thing people are forgetting is that Nightbringer is STILL Obey Me! I'm definitely going to be still talking about it

Ok so I have an exam in 2 days and I think I've answered every possible question about Nightbringer you could possibly have so I'm calling it here.

Won't be answering new asks until sunday. Everything posted will be from queue.

If you want to see my others asks/answers regarding Nighbringer just hit the tag on this post

[bellysoupset]

I know you said that Luke gets the lion's share of attention, but I'd love to see him maybe getting dangerously drunk at a party with the football team and either Vince or Leo calling Jonah in a panic because they don't know whether he needs to go to hospital...

(bonus points if he drunk dials Bella before he's utterly paralytic 👀)

I LOVED this prompt, it kinda caused the entire break up plot to spiral badly. Now we're here, angst fest. This is a part 1.

-------

Vince was not in the mood to play tonight. Not him and certainly not Leo. They had just recovered from their own turn with the flu and to make matters worse Lucas' had been acting completely off since the aforementioned Break Up.

No one dared to say anything about it, but they were all thinking it.

They were playing at home tonight, which was a relief, because it was a freezing night and Vince did not want to add an incredibly inconvenient bus drive on top of the general down mood.

"Hey cap," Vince thumped Lucas' back as he finished strapping his helmet, "everything good?"

"Yes," Lucas answered roughly, pushing the helmet down on his head. Over his shoulder, Leo flinched and Vince smiled at him in sympathy. He waited until his friend marched ahead before approaching the blonde.

"What do you think?" Vince whispered and Leo shrugged, looking every bit as annoyed as Vince felt.

"I think we're going to lose."

"Yeah, me too."

They didn't lose. Nearly did, but not quite. 33 vs 29. Such a game would normally have all of them in a frenzy in the locker room, euphoric even, but not this time around.

Instead, Lucas was the first out of the field, and the first out of the showers, sitting down on the bench to put on his shoes, while the rest of them were still busy arguing with each other and getting rid of the uniform.

Vince didn't expect Lucas to still be around by the time he walked out of the showers. With how incredibly childish and pissy Luke was acting, he expect the man to have left already.

Instead he was still sitting on the bench, humid towel hanging around his neck and still shirtless, the water dripping from his hair. No matter that it had just started to snow and everyone was rushing to get dressed as fast as possible.

"Okay," Vince moved closer, tugging his shirt down, "what's the matter?"

"Uh?" Lucas raised his eyes, seemingly lost and Vince frowned at him, bumping his knee against his friend's.

"What's the matter?"

"Hey Luke," Aidan interrupted Vince's rant, a huge smile on, "we're heading out, you're joining?"

"Yeah," Lucas opened a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes, but finally seemed to be startled into moving. He put on the shirt, while Vince raised both eyebrows.

"Where are you going?"

"Celebrate, duh" Mickey slapped his arm, "you wanna join? You can bring Tinkerbell."

"Don't call her that," Vince immediately shut him down, while Leo scooted closer.

"We're going out?" he asked and then very quickly it got out of control and both Leo and Vince were pulled into the partying, even though neither of them were feeling it.

Vince felt completely out of character, being the only sober one sitting on the corner.

"Mikey burped on my face and I nearly threw up," Leo said, slumping down next to him. Maybe not the only sober one, Vince thought, letting out a surprised chuckle.

"We'll just stay an hour and then get the fuck out," he said, leaning back and tugging on his jeans. He had gone down an entire size thanks to the flu, it was annoying as hell to keep pulling on his pants.

Leo grinned, "we could have a beer. Granted I'll probably throw it up, but I don't wanna sulk here in the corner."

Vince rolled his eyes, incredulous, "fuck no. I've been on a liquids only diet all week, I'm not risking it. You go ahead, though."

The blonde shrugged, picking at his nail as they watched their friends have fun. Or something like that, in Luke's case. Whatever he was having didn't seem to be "fun".

"Just one," Leo smiled mischievously and then got up to join them. Vince grinned back at him, thinking the guy was insane for trying his luck like that.

One hour very quickly turned into one and a half when Leo hopped back to the table and dragged him to join the rest of them, exclaiming loudly that just because Vince was going fully sober tonight, it didn't mean he had to pout-

Lucas draped an arm around his shoulders, head nodding along to Leo's giggly speech, "he's right. Sit with us-" then he downed another shot.

"You've got to let loose," Luke said, a dumb smile on, eyes completely dazed, "you've been so pressed this week, calm down."

"I've been sick this week, not pressed," Vince rolled his eyes, shoving Luke away from him in a playful manner.

It was a really cold night and getting colder, even inside the dimly lit pub. They were all packed together for warmth, as Leo explained, downing a shot of tequila that he regretted exactly twenty minutes later, as he lowered his head to Vince's shoulder.

"Nothing is sitting right."

"I'm shocked," Vince chuckled, thumping his back, "just puke it up, you'll feel better."

"Ew, no," Leo shook his head, yawning, "I want to go home, I think I had enough fun."

Same, Vince thought. He had been nursing the same sprite since they arrived and although his mood was a little lighter, he was dead on his feet and wanted to go to sleep.

"Yeah, let's go- Where's Luke?"

"He was doing shots in the back with Spence and Alex...?" his voice trailed off at the end, turned into a question and Vince frowned, looking away from the shitty television behind the bartender, that was displaying a football game, and towards the blonde.

"Leo?"

"Spence?" Leo straightened up, sobering up, "dude- Hey, what's going on?!"

Only then did Vince realize that Spencer was clutching his nose, blood gushing between his fingers, while Alex was holding up a bunch of napkins.

"Lucas'z a duckin'dunt" Spencer groaned, wincing in pain. Vince frowned, looking at Alex for explanations.

"What happened? Where is he?"

"Drunk dialing his girlfriend," Alex scoffed, rolling his eyes, "and crying. We tried to stop him, but he shoved Spencer when he tried to get the phone."

Oh that explained it. Leo exchanged a concerned look with Vince.

"Where is he?"

"Bathroom," Alex rolled his eyes, "you guys think it's broken?"

"No," Leo shook his head, "he'd be in a lot more pain if it was broken."

"Maybe it's time we all call it a night," Vince said, but he didn't really stick around to hear the responses, as he was already walking to the bathroom.

Whatever he expected to find, it certainly wasn't Lucas curled up on a very disgusting bathroom floor.

"Lucas...?" he ran inside, all but skipping to his knees, "Luke, what are you doing on the ground? Lucas, hey!" he shook his friend's shoulder and Lucas let out a groan.

He had vomit on his shirt and blood on his knuckles, all in all a picture of misery. He also didn't seem able to support his head at all, like a baby, "...eave'me-alone," he slurred and Vince's heart picked up.

"Hell no," he cupped Lucas' neck, feeling his rapid heart beat, skin clammy, "Luke, are you just wasted or-"

His shoulders hitched again and more pale yellow puke covered his lap. Lucas seemed too out of it to even feel bad or humiliated by it, all he did was let out another pitiful whine.

"LEO!" Vince shouted, not looking away from his best friend, "LEO!"

"Vin? I'm just calling Spen- What the fuck?!" Leo cut himself immediately as he took in the state Lucas was in. He walked inside the bathroom, crouching down, "Lucas? Luke, hey - Is he conscious?"

"Barely," Vince patted his best friend cheek, "get Jon on the phone!" he bossed, already fishing for his own phone. He struggled to find Wendy's contact, panic making his mind cloudy.

Between them, Lucas let out another groan and dipped dangerously to the side, causing Vince to lurch forward to grab him, patting his cheek again, "Luke, wake up. Stay with me, alright? Open your eyes."

As if actually obeying, Lucas blinked blearily, the fact his eyes were bloodshot making the green stand out scarily.

"Jon!?" Leo squealed to his left, "Jonah, we're at a bar and- And Luke is completely passed out and we don't know what to do-"

"Leo?" Jonah sounded asleep. Vince vaguely tried to think of what hour was it. 1 AM? "Leo, what's going on-"

"Jon," Vince interrupted, as Leo put the call on speaker, "we're in some pub and Luke is wasted. Like actually properly wasted, I- We have no idea what to do."

There was a pause as Jonah collected himself, "is he conscious?"

"Not really, just a little but not responding."

"Okay, if he's awake keep him sitting up, otherwise put him on his side to not choke on his sick," Jonah bossed and then they heard rustling around and the noise suddenly changed. A crowded room.

"He's puked, like a lot-" Leo offered, unhelpfully and Vince rubbed Lucas' arm, trying to keep him awake.

"While conscious?" Jonah asked, his voice muffled by the noise, "were you there?"

"No, we just found him," Vince's heart was in his throat. Had he severely fucked up by letting Luke out of his sight?

"Fuck," Jonah cursed and then his voice changed as they heard him telling the front desk of the hospital, "I need an ambulance to this address- Guys, where are you?"

"Uhm-" Vince struggled to remember, but Leo interrupted him, citing the address perfectly from memory.

"It's not far from the hospital, we're just around the corner of the university..." He added, then sucked in a sob as Lucas groaned and then his eyes rolled back into his head, turning into half moons of white.

"Shit! Leo, move, let's get him lying down-" Vince ushered him, rolling Luke to his side, almost curled up, "is this right? Should we stick something in his mouth so he won't bite his tongue?"

"Is he seizing?" Jonah yelled through the phone, interrupting Vince's worried questions.

"No, but he passed out," Leo answered, planting his fingers to Lucas' neck, "and his heart is really really fast."

"He might have a seizure. Do not hold him or try to stick your fingers in his mouth, or put anything in. All you'll do is choke him," Jonah sounded just as panicked as the rest of them, "check if he's breathing."

"He is, really slow, but he is."

"Alright, just move anything from around him that could potentially hurt hi-"

"Shit," Leo groaned just as Lucas' shuddered on his side and then coughed up another stream of pale vomit, this time all over the blonde's knee next to his head, "he's throwing up again."

"That's good, he's responsive then," Jonah sighed in relief, "three minutes for the ambulance, just stay with him- One of you should go talk with the bartender and see what he drank. Or took."

"Lucas doesn't do drugs," Vince said, defensively and Leo let out a disbelieving scoff.

"He also doesn't get black out drunk, but we're here!"

"I'll go..." Vince said, but didn't move. He couldn't move, "Jonah, is he going to be okay?" he said, voice small. Lucas might be acting like a prick, but he was not ready to lose his best friend. At twenty three? In some dingy pub's floor? No fucking way.

"Vince go check the bottles, the paramedic will need to know when they get there. Leo, check if he's breathing again, make sure it doesn't sound like he's wheezing."

Vince nodded, noticing just how Jonah had refused to answer his question. He got up, stumbling and rushed out of the bathroom.

Much to his relief no drugs had been involved, the bartender spilling the beans the minute Vince said Lucas was passed out and the ambulance would be there in a minute. Just loads and loads of alcohol, so much that the man ended up just writing it all down on a paper napkin, seeing as Vince was shaking too much and too choked up to properly remember any of the names.

"Which one of you is-"

"Vince, Vince," Leo tugged at his sleeve and from the way his nose and eyes were red, it was clear he was and had been crying, "you go. I - I'll just... I'll send the other guys home, I'll meet you there."

"Are you sure?" Vince asked, but he didn't mean it. There was zero chance he was staying behind when his best friend had a group of paramedics lifting him up.

"Yes, go. I'll meet you there," Leo was shaking like crazy, hyperventilating.

Vince nodded, drunkenly chasing after the paramedics and getting in the back part of the ambulance.

"Does he drink frequently?" the paramedic asked him immediately and Vince shook his head.

"No, almost never, actually," he squeezed Luke's hand, while they checked his respiratory vias, "he - He had a bad month, that's all."

"Is he a danger to himself?"

"No," Vince scoffed, "Luke's not dangerous, he's the nicest person I know-"

"No, sir, is he a danger to himself? Do you think the amount of alcohol consumed was purposeful?" the paramedic repeated, stabbing Luke's finger with something that looked like a diabetic device.

"I... I don't know, I don't think so...? No, Luke's not suicidal, no," Vince shook his head, knee deep in denial. He couldn't even wrap his mind around it, but besides just not believing Lucas was suicidal, he didn't believe this was how he'd choose to go, "no, not at all."

"Has he shown any concerning behavior recently?"

"Is he going to be okay?" Vince interrupted, "because you're sounding like- Like he's gonna be arrested or something, he just drank too much too fast. He's fine. He'll be fine, right?"

The paramedic, an older guy whom Vince vaguely remembered from the hospital, opened a small reassuring smile, "we're doing our best."

That was not a fucking answer, Vince scoffed, squeezing Lucas' hand even more tightly, urging him to wake the fuck up. What a mess of a night.

Once they parked, they rushed Lucas inside and ahead of him, but Jonah was already at the doors of ER, in scrubs and looking every piece as wrecked as Vince felt.

"Dr. Cohen is ta-"

Vince shut him up by tackling him into a hug, all of his emotions crashing down on him. He expected Jonah to pull back, but instead he squeezed him a little harder, letting out a measured breath.

"He's all white and... And dead... I- I don't-"

"Vince," Jonah pulled back, tugging on his white lab coat to force some composure, "breathe. Sit down. They're checking him over, there's nothing you can do now."

"Are they... What happens now?" Vince crumbled down on top of a hospital plastic chair, making the seat creak. Jonah shuffled uncomfortably.

"First we need him to wake up. Then we'll keep him for 12 hours on a glycose drip and diazepam."

Vince stared at him and Jonah opened an exhausted smile, "they'll just put him on IVs. It's not as dramatic as on TV... Bella called me."

"What?"

"Apparently she tried calling you too, but... Uhm, Luke called her before you guys found him. Scared the living crap out of her, she's on her way here."

"At... At 1 AM?"

"It's almost 3," Jonah rolled his eyes, wiping a hand over his face, "you should go wash up, you look like a mess. Leo said anything?"

"He should be here in a minute too, he said he'd meet me here."

"Okay, I'll wait for him then," Jonah crossed his arms, "go, Vince."

[cobrakaisb]

the babysitters club

summary: y/n and thomas have a date night, leaving a group of the umich boys in charge of charlotte; chaos ensues 

warnings: briss and kent not knowing how to handle children, comedic fluff

word count: 956

read the rest of the team baby series! part one, part two, part three

“are you sure this is a good idea?” y/n asked from her spot in the bathroom, where she was finishing getting ready for date night with thomas. the two of them had yet to go on an official date, and both were looking forward to some time to themselves. 

“they’re going to be fine babe. charlotte is always with them and nothing has happened yet,” thomas replied. “yet? you think something will happen? maybe i should just call the sitter that i normally use,” y/n ranted, picking up her phone to call said sitter. thomas sighed, grabbing the phone from her hand. “y/n, mon amour, the boys are going to be just fine with charlotte. we’ll only be gone for a couple hours. besides, charlotte usually goes to sleep around seven, meaning she should only be awake for about thirty minutes after our departure,” thomas reasoned and y/n nodded, feeling at ease after his words. 

that was absolutely not the case. 

y/n and thomas left about an hour ago, and charlotte was still wide awake. “she should be asleep by now,” luke mumbled, looking at the notes y/n left for them on the kitchen counter. matty nodded in agreement, reading the paper over the freshmen’s shoulder. “maybe she needs a bottle?” he suggested. when luke nodded in agreement, the older boy began to prepare one. 

suddenly, charlotte’s loud cries echoed throughout the house. “oh my god she’s crying again! why is she crying?” brendan exclaimed, looking around at the other boys. “i don’t know,” kent replied, looking at brendan and the baby. “here kent, you take her! figure out how to make her stop crying!” brendan said, holding charlotte out to the blonde boy, who was vigorously shaking his head no.

“i don’t know how to make babies stop crying. give her to owen, she likes him,” kent said, pointing to the tall hockey player who was lounging on the couch. owen nodded, sitting up a bit to hold charlotte. once she was in his arms, he tried to soothe the cries by rocking her and whispering soothing words.   

that did not work. 

“here. try the bottle, maybe she’s hungry?” matty suggested, handing owen the bottle he just prepared. everyone agreed, and owen tried to give charlotte the bottle but she was not having it. “c’mon char, work with me here,” owen grumbled, trying to give her the bottle, but charlotte refused and just kept crying. 

“should we call y/n? she’ll know what to do,” luke asked, looking around at the other guys. “absolutely not! she’ll never trust us with charlotte again! and we’re her uncles, we can’t be deprived of visitation rights! plus you know how excited they were for this date tonight, the second she thinks something is wrong with charlotte she’ll come running back,” brendan argued. “true. but we don’t know what to do,” matty said. “should we google it?” kent asked, already pulling out his phone to google the best way to deal with a crying baby. 

“okay, wikihow says to address the baby's basic needs as step one,” kent said. “like what a diaper change?” brendan asked, looking at the phone over kent’s shoulder. “exactly,” the canadian replied. “i don’t think that’s the problem. we changed her diaper ten minutes ago, literally right before she started crying,” owen said, gesturing for kent to move on. 

“well step two isn’t going to work since she won’t drink the bottle. do you think she needs to be burped?” kent asked. “who cares! let’s try it,” brendan said, grabbing a cloth for owen to lay on his shoulder. “why am i doing this? aren’t you trying to be the godfather briss?” owen griped, adjusting charlotte so that she was upright. “if this comes in the job description you can take it,” the brunette answered, followed by matty slapping him on the shoulder. 

after a few minutes of burping charlotte seemed to calm down. the boys all sighed in relief, thinking the crying was over and she would settle down for bed. once again, they were wrong. “that’s it. i’m calling y/n and thomas. there’s no way that wikihow has a solution for this,” luke announced, dialing y/n’s number. 

“no! there’s one more thing. wikihow said she might need something to chew on, like her pacifier,” kent said, halting luke’s actions. “great. where are the pacifiers?” brendan asked. “i think they’re in the cabinet with all the baby stuff, or maybe in the diaper bag,” owen suggested, getting up to help look. 

“here’s the big bird one!” matty shouted, holding up the bright yellow pacifier to show the boys. “okay rinse it off with hot water,” owen instructed, holding his hand out for it. matty did as he was told, passing the pacifier to owen, who held it up to charlotte’s lips. she accepted the item easily, her tears subsiding. the boys waited with bated breaths for her to fully calm down before allowing any sort of relief to sink in. thankfully, charlotte stayed quiet, her eyes slowly closing as owen rocked her in his arms. 

just as she fully settled down, the front door opened. y/n and thomas walked into the house. “we’re home!” thomas shouted, and all the boys grimaced, praying that charlotte didn’t wake up. “how’d it go? i hope she didn’t cause any problems,” y/n said, walking into the kitchen. the boys all shook their heads no. “she was fine. we had a great time,” brendan answered. “perfect. that means you can watch her again next week when we go on another date,” thomas said, clapping his best friend on the shoulder. 

the five boys’ eyes widened at thomas’s words. 

[phoenixyfriend]

Fake Sith TCW Trio

I have another fucked up time-travel AU! Who’s surprised? (Nobody.)

So like. Have you guys read that one fic where Luke and his students go back in time and pretend to be Sith Lords and are super hammy about it? (Sith Lord Swell by AMournfulHowlInTheNight)

This AU has contributions by @atagotiak, @the-lunar-system, @purronronner, @gelpenss, @creepingthroughthistidalwave, and @thisarenotarealblog.

I want TCW trio (plus Rex and Cody) to go back to several years pre-TPM and, since the Council DEFINITELY won't believe them about the Sith being back... they'll force the issue.

Anakin is weirdly excited about things and building up their backstory.

Anakin: Okay so I can definitely be a Maul type, with the unhinged ranting and manic laughter, Obi-Wan can be the whole Refined Rich Guy type like Dooku, where you can't even tell he's evil until he starts talking about getting out the eyeball scoops, maybe toss in a bit of mad science stuff? Ahsoka could play up like Ventress OR, oh oh, she can be the Light Side Child we need to PROTECT who's publicly begging us to return to the Light after our big dramatic Falls where we murdered like eighty people to save her, and-- Obi-Wan: Why are you never this enthusiastic about actual undercover missions. Ahsoka: Did you just have all this ready to go, or...? Anakin: WE COULD GET YELLOW CONTACT LENSES FOR ME.

Obi-Wan: How's my evil laugh?

Anakin going “Okay.. so if any of us need to murder someone to sell the bit it should be me, I think I could handle it the best. Why? No reason.”

Obi-Wan: I'm not sure a complete Fall could come from protecting Ahsoka, really-- Anakin: No, no, it could.

Obi-Wan: Surely you’d hold back because you realize neither of us want that for you. Anakin: Uh. Sure. Definitely.

Obi-Wan points out that none of them can channel the dark side to Prove they're Sith and Anakin just goes "Okay, give me like two seconds to stew in my negativity and--right, you can stop staring in horror, please."

Anakin rambles on that they can TOTALLY make the galaxy a better place while playing at being Sith! He's got a whole LIST of slave empires to "take over" and disassemble!

Anakin has a whole excited spiel about how EVIL soldiers and assistants are minions, in this case partly because Cody and Rex are too good at what they do to be mooks. Cody could pull off evil minion very well. Facial scar? Looks good in black? Quietly competent and sarcastic?

He also pushes for Obi-Wan to lounge in a fancy throne with a glass of wine while Anakin stalks the shadows and Ahsoka hangs out on the window ledge. The disaster lineage is dramatic, okay, Anakin’s just leaning into it, he’d appreciate it if everyone stopped looking at him like that.

Qui-Gon, surprisingly, ends up a skeptic about all of this. Everyone is freaking out about the Sith and he’s like “y’know I’m not even sure they’re darksiders.”

Some Jedi, possibly Qui-Gon for his conspiracy board, gets in a real risky situation and one of the Fake Sith saves them, but also panics and kinda drops character for a bit.

Jedi: You saved me! Why’d you do that? Anakin: I uh... just wanted the pleasure of killing you myself?

"You saved me. Why?" "Mmmm. Jedi." [walks away]

Qui-Gon: [trying to figure out what is up with these people semi-competently (from his perspective) pretending to be Sith] Dooku: [trying to protect Qui-Gon from Sith influence]

The gang is the most successful at pretending to be Sith to Dooku. Sure, they’re not gonna punish him for something he hasn’t done, but it’s not hard to act menacing and angry around him.

(They really do have so much fun irritating the heck out of Dooku. He hasn’t Fallen yet, but they want to keep an eye out.)

At some point, future Obi-Wan definitely drops that little tidbit of "What, you didn't think the Banites were the only Sith running around did you? You... didn't even know about the Banites. How... disappointing."

They REGULARLY use Ahsoka as an excuse to be marginally less terrible. They claim that if Ahsoka pouts, they stop. ‘Soka also uses them as an excuse for why she’s a lil feral. (To be fair, that one is accurate. She was already a lil feral before but it’s not like they did anything to stop it.) Ahsoka gets her "breaking into people's offices" jollies by bugging Nute Gunray's office.

The Jedi keep trying to Rescue Ahsoka.

Rex and Cody end up in real beskar, there's a whole Thing with Mandalore and Jango and Satine.

Obi-Wan is CONSISTENTLY worried about Anakin Falling for real, which... hey, at least he knows to be worried about Anakin Falling. Step up from canon, really.

Anakin is WAY too into killing the Hutts but like. It does... technically sell the bit.

Obi-Wan: Sure, I’m not sad that they’re dead, especially because we’re not connected to the Republic, so we don’t need to worry about starting a war and all that. But. Anakin is disturbingly cheerful about this. Rex: Wasn't he a Hutt slave? Obi-Wan: Well yes, but-- Rex: I'd kill Nala Se if I could get away with it.

Cody and Rex are very supportive of Anakin's murderous intentions.

Obi-Wan does understand anger, even killing someone in anger. Like Maul (the first time at least) and D’nar and a few others. All the same, like... y’know. The level of bloodthirst from the others is a little off-putting.

At one point, Anakin accidentally addresses young Obi-Wan by name, despite never having met before, and to cover it up, he... panic-flirts. He panics, and so he flirts, with young Obi-Wan.

(He will later blame this on old Obi-Wan, because he had to pick up the habit of flirting with the enemy from somewhere.)

Anakin vaguely implies that he's a wee bit obsessed with young Obi, and that the padawan should "get used to being the target of a dark-sider's interests," because he’s scrambling for Ominous Shit and, well, future Obi-Wan was pretty frequently a fixation point for darksiders, right?

The second he gets out, he just starts screaming into a bucket while Rex pats him on the back.

For the next however many terrible months, possibly years, he has to keep up the act while having an ongoing meltdown about how That's My Dad As A Twenty-Something.

(It doesn't help that young Obi-Wan reflexively flirted back.)

Old Obi-Wan, meanwhile, is just very "you dug this hole yourself, padawan."

There is an argument at the beginning about Obi-Wan’s outfit. If he’s gonna be a Sith, he can’t just go around in beige, but he’s like “I like this and it’s comfy.” Sure, he’s changed clothes for undercover stuff, but that’s always been temporary, y’know? He likes his beige.

We have a number of options.

My first instinct? Beige linen three piece suit, like a southern lawyer. "Now I may just be a simple Outer Rim force adept--"

And, of course, you can TOTALLY make the beige sinister: he’s impersonating a Jedi! Jedi impersonation would also explain why nobody has a red saber.

“Sure is good that the Jedi don’t seem to realize most of the galaxy doesn’t know red sabers are different and bad.” “Shhhh, stop poking holes in our story where a Jedi might overhear.”

Like.... if you do enough doublethink, it works! How would a Sith hide? In plain sight. Also, it’s a GREAT way (if they were actually assholes) to try to slander the Jedi name.

(Anakin and Ahsoka still think he could stand to put a little more effort in. Add a splash of color, for pity's sake!)

Though tbh part of me is like “What if Old Obi wore, like... a split skirt suit...” Victorian womenswear inspired because he misses his robes, but he has to look Professional, and like he's MOCKING Jedi instead of BEING one, so he wears a vintage-y split skirt thing over his leggings. Ends up looking a lot like what Ventress had for a while, but Beige. I also keep wanting to put him regency menswear.

Anyway. Obi-Wan’s wardrobe aside...

Anakin builds up his Tatoo accent again. It helps him with the (mostly true) "slavery helped me fall" backstory.

Either Cody or Rex offhandedly mentions being made to serve them (the Fake Sith) and now the Jedi are somewhat concerned about brainwashing. Are these Mandos the victims here?

“No like. Literally made for this. In a lab.” This is even more horrifying. So...

On the one hand good! The Jedi should be scared about Sith! On the other hand... it makes the Jedi more determined to stop them, specifically. They keep on getting in the way, just, all the time, and they’re not investigating the actual Sith problem, which is decidedly not great since the Team doesn’t actually know who’s a real Sith right now, except Maul, and who even knows where that guy is.

Obi-Wan, at some point: Do you think we've succeeded at this ruse... a little TOO well? Anakin: I don't follow. Obi-Wan, gesturing at the truly obnoxious amount of wealth they've collected, including "trophies" of their kills: Really? Because I'm a little worried! Anakin, planning out a battle to take on Nar Shadda: ...I'm not.

"How many people do we realistically we need to take over Hutt Space? Apparently... five."

(Mostly because Anakin is ridiculously op.)

ANAKIN AND YOUNG OBI GET KIDNAPPED BY PIRATES TOGETHER. It's tradition.

Anakin: Okay, so, I need to get really angry about something to pass as a Sith... time to think about my WIFE and how I'll NEVER SEE HER AGAIN.

Since Anakin’s life never goes as planned... this does not work. Instead of getting properly angry, he makes himself sad. There are tears. There is wailing. There’s a distraught rant or two. Young Obi ends up awkwardly trying to comfort him.

“Oh no, this… Sith?? Is crying on me. What do I do???”

Later on, when the Council wants intel: "So... one of the Sith cried on me about his wife. I think she's dead? He wasn't very clear about it but it, uh... it sounded like it might have contributed to his Fall. Also the relationship was a little unhealthy? He basically worshiped the ground she walked on and kept ranting about how he would have given her the galaxy on a platinum platter of she'd only asked, but that might be new and inspired by the Dark."

One of the random Jedi is REALLY good at detecting the truth Through The Force, and asks Anakin how he Fell...

Anakin just. Tells the Tuskens story.

They don't get pinged as lying, but oh boy does old Obi have a LOT of questions for Anakin once they're in private.

There are other things happening to help sell the ruse. Some of them are necessary! Some of them are... not.

Obi-Wan: What's the best way to show we're rich and kind of evil, but like... classy about it? Anakin, immediately: I sit on the floor next to the throne, leaning against it, and you call me pet names while stroking my hair, and then when you need something killed I get to do it for you and then I go back to the floor and you thank me for the directed violence, and then you go back to Negotiations with criminals while I’m sitting there covered in blood. Obi-Wan: ...is there something you want to TELL us, or...?

"You're all going to get a glimpse of something normally kept hidden about me." "Anakin, you don't have to do that." "No, I'm gonna."

(Anakin has decided hes going to peel his kink tomato to sell this ruse, and the others are slightly uncomfortable with that.)

Anakin: Okay, I cannot keep flirting with you. Young Obi: Wait, what? But that's the best part of any time we run into you! Anakin: You look WAY too much like my Master did when I met him. Obi: O...kay? If someone looked like my master when HE was young, I'd-- Anakin: My Sith Master half-raised me. He's basically my dad. Obi: ... Anakin: What's that look for? Obi: I mean, you spend a lot of time lounging at his feet, and, like, given how much you hate slavery, I... kind of assumed it was a kink thing? Anakin, brightly: Oh no, I just have a LOT of trauma. And neuroses. Snips says they’re neuroses.

Young Obi is a little upset because he was actually getting REALLY into Flirting With The Enemy and was hoping it would go somewhere. He mopes to Qui-Gon about it. Qui-Gon isn't sure whether to be proud about Obi breaking rules, or worried over Obi-Wan falling for a Fake Sith.

(As Tia put it: "You enjoy making young Obi-Wan have a completely unrequited crush on Anakin, don’t you?")

Fortunately, one of those attractive Young Mando boys very kindly helped him tape up his ribs this one time, and has thus caught his eye...

I feel like having Cody date Young Obi would court an entirely different kind of (internet) drama because clone ages, but whatever.

Also please imagine an element of "so I'm dating the genetic identical of my boss... who's dating the man I'm a genetic identical of..."

(It's probably not actually Jangobi but man would that be funny and also stupid.)

Somehow Young Obi figures out that the "Sith Master" is a future him before he realizes that they're not actually dark. In his defense, Anakin was pretty convincing. Especially with the wife rant. It makes HIM more obsessed with Anakin, in a reversal of the implied earlier dynamic, which is all kinds of weird. Less romantic but like. Still weird.

"Future Me Scares Me" with Extra stupid. "Future Me Annoys Me." "Future Me acts like grandmaster Dooku, but more sass." "Future Me raised a really hot evil guy that refuses to bang Present Me." "Future Me might be a Sith, but I'm getting more and more convinced he's just fucking with us all." "Future Me is really rocking that beard, and I can't BELIEVE we figured out a way around the babyface."

"I’m kinda concerned about the whole evil thing, but I’m also glad that I know I’ll stay hot as I get older."

Quinlan approves of the priorities.

Also a lot of interactions with older Obi are very Anakin: [does/says something deeply unhinged] Obi-Wan: So, do you want to…. Talk about that? Maybe? Anakin: What’s there to talk about?? I’m fine, everything’s fine! Anyways how about those plans for tracking down Maul?

Anakin later, like way after the ruse is lifted, just blankly tells everyone that he did Fall, once, and Older Obi made him get therapy about it after the truth came out between the two of them a few months into the Fake Sith thing.

Where'd they find a therapist? I'm sure there's one SOMEWHERE around. Denon and Herdessa are close enough, and they've done enough "your criminal empire now belongs to me" that they can pay well. They make sure to find one that takes confidentiality real seriously.

It's all very "we need some more time to unpack all that."

Therapy helps get Anakin to figure out Sheev’s whole deal. They don't necessarily figure out he’s a Sith from it, but they figure out he’s sketchy and they need to look into that more. Obi-Wan probably already thought he was sketchy, but the whole active gaslighting campaign was a little surprising. They realize that he kinda benefited a lot from a lot of Sith plots and they still probably don’t think he’s a Sith but Obi-Wan is definitely starting to think he’s working with one.

"Okay, we're already bugging Gunray, should we bug Palpatine just to be safe?"

They get away with a lot of slicing because Anakin is a technical genius from twenty years in the future.

The reasons they're so good at Taking Over Hutt Space: 1. They know parts of the future. 2. They have superpowers and FAR less reason to not use them, now that their actions aren't going to reflect on the Republic. 3. They have Cody and Rex, who are two of the greatest military minds in the galaxy, and know EXACTLY how to wage a war that covers a solid third of the galaxy, starting from a position of relative weakness. 4. Anakin's charisma is scary high, and his knowledge of slave culture means they gain a lot of trust from the people they free, and they just... keep acquiring volunteers for the army they didn't plan to have. Obi-Wan doesn't know what to do. He thinks they might have started a cult?

In his defense, Dooku sort of started a cult, and Komari got kidnapped by a cult, brainwashed into joining it properly, and then took it over as head figure of said cult. It's practically tradition!

Comics Vader is the central figure of like three different cults, it was really just inevitable.

Anakin: Aw, don't worry master, it's not a cult, it's a revolution! Ahsoka: They're worshiping him, though. Anakin: ...it's still a revolution! Just... with some misunderstandings.

Also, if they got wind of people trying to keep people from being able to leave and other culty stuff like that, they’d probably put a stop to it pretty damn quick.

Names! Time for names. As per usual, it's easiest to keep track of Obi-Wan's alternate Older Self by just calling him Ben.

Darth Ben.

Ahsoka: You should be Darth Boring. Obi-Wan: I can still make you run laps, you know.

Anakin: The Force is telling me to call myself Darth Vader. Obi-Wan: ...why? Anakin: I dunno, but it sounds cool, I'll run with it.

Someone: Ben has all the answers; we shouldn’t question him, ever. Ben: One time I lost a planet, and a five-year-old found it for me.

More options: Going with the "evil word with the prefix 'in' chopped off" that we get with Sidious and Vader: Darth Surrectus (as in insurrection) Just random Latin words: Darth Temporus (time) Darth Commenticius (fake)

Anyway, back to Nonsense:

Maul goes after young Obi early, because the Fake Sith are really invested in this one random Padawan (Sidious is saying he might be a cousin of the false Sith Master? They do look similar enough) so someone needs to investigate. Naturally, Anakin shows up with some wild screeching to fight Maul, and when someone questions why he got involved it gets very "Kenobi is MINE!" and like. Okay. So.

Anakin means it in a very Sith "to toy with" and "to torture" way, or the ‘my chosen opponent!’ way, just the same kind of Obsession as Maul had with Obi-Wan in the original timeline. Unfortunately, Anakin’s a weird-ass person who flirts with Young Obi against his own better judgement, so there's some awkward "Like... your boyfriend?" from young Obi. Anakin just screeches in SOME emotion that nobody wants to interpret, and couldn't even if they wanted to, and starts whacking away at Maul again.

(Anakin hasn't explained the "you look exactly like my dad, sorry, it's just too weird" thing yet, and he is HAVING MANY REGRETS.)

There's definitely at least one instance where a person asks Anakin if he's planning on dating That One Jedi Twink, or at least banging out the tension. At that point in time, Anakin doesn't actually know who the fuck they're talking about, because "Obi-Wan + Twink = Does Not Compute" for dear, dense Ani, and instead he just ends up ranting about how he is LOYAL TO THE MEMORY OF HIS LATE WIFE, how DARE anyone so much as INSINUATE that he would TARNISH HER PERFECT MEMORY and UNWAVERING KINDNESS and WHOLESOME BEING, and the person who asked doesn't end up lightsabered but they do end up with a LOT to tell whoever they're reporting to.

Young Obi-Wan definitely hears Anakin mutter the phrase “something to discuss with my therapist later” a few times, and he’s a little bewildered because darksiders definitely don’t seem like the type of people to go to therapy. They’re the type of people to need therapy, sure, but not the type to go to therapy.

I think it would be very fun for Young Obi to continue sighing over Anakin (who's pretending to be fine with it and even flirting back because he's in too deep to stop and hasn't worked up the courage to explain the elephant in the room) while Anakin is covered in grease and infodumping while having a slightly manic hyperfocus on engine repairs while the two of them Somehow got stranded together in the middle of bumfuck nowhere (it's Plagueis's doing, he finds the interactions between THESE two in particular to be the most informative regarding the fake Sith).

Anakin, at some point while stranded with young Obi-Wan, and having actually started unpacking some stuff in therapy, though he’s def still got a ways to go: I’m pretty sure Ben cares about me. He acts like he cares, like he’ll do stuff like put extra blankets in my quarters in the spaceship because I get cold real easily or track down those droid parts I need for a project and he always has my back in a fight but y’know it’d be nice to hear him say he loves me once in a while. Especially because we kinda had a rough start and idk I don’t think he wanted me around at first.

And uh. Obi-Wan definitely relates to that a bit too much, y’know?

I want to say that Young Obi ends up mentioning All That to one of the clones or Ahsoka later, because they seem probably invested in Anakin's well-being, even if Ben is, well, a Sith, so Obi-Wan's a little worried the man's affection really is fake, but at least Ahsoka...

(Ironic, given what Anakin's actual eventual Sith would-be-Master was like.)

Young Obi mentions Anakin’s most recent rant to Ahsoka, and she just goes "Wait, is that why Skyguy likes to sit by the throne and get called pet names?" "Uh... I don't... know... but it sounds like all of you have a LOT to unpack there, Miss Apprentice."

Later on: "Master Kenobi, you need to tell Skyguy you love him 'cause apparently he's been having a lot of emotions about you not telling him you care and he's been talking to mini-you about it whenever they get stuck together and--"

Young Obi-Wan is just constantly the "Now we don't have time to unpack all of that" John Mulaney gif. Anakin in particular is a mess, and young Obi-Wan slowly goes from "I want to date that" to "I want to study that" about him.

Obi-Wan gets stuck somewhere with Ben, tries to small talk, gets on the topic of Vader, and spills the drama. He gets an awkward “Thank you for bringing that to my attention.”

It’s followed by a fairly frustrated “I try, but Anakin refuses to communicate his needs to me, and it feels like I’m always falling short.”

At least one member of the group is in therapy, probably all of them, but they’re still using young Obi as a sounding board for all this stuff. On the bright side, this is probably good for impressing the importance of good communication on Obi-Wan.

Good for Obi-Wan! And... whatever Padawan he eventually has.

As for baby Anakin, who is approximately age four, I want to go with "Anakin decides to be his own uncle, and Shmi just rolls with it because fuck it, she’s not a slave anymore, and a Fake Sith is a solid defense against anyone trying to re-enslave them."

[This is a backstory I've had them use before (see here and here).]

Seeing Big Ani and Little Ani in the same space might be what finally pings the "oh shit, that's future me" thing for Obi-Wan... you know, if he’s ever allowed close enough to see Little Ani in the first place.

Little Ani stays with the fake-Sith and is sorta jointly trained by all of them, and young Obi-Wan teaches little 'Soka at the Temple. Ani and 'Soka still end up friends somehow, but it is fairly different.

Every time little Ani addresses Old Obi as "Dad," it's just like ten kinds of awkward. The one time someone tried to explain that Ben wasn't his new dad, Shmi glared them down. She is of the opinion that, all the gods be damned, Ani deserves to refer to the most mature man in his life, who raised another him in another timeline already, as a father.

Ani doesn't NEED a father, Shmi herself is more than enough, but he does deserve to have this if he wants it.

An alternative conclusion to the time travel is uh. So the Mandalorians are genetically identical (give or take a hair gene) and really resemble Jango Fett, though whether anyone notices that is up in the air. Then the three ‘Sith’ (two fake Sith and their morality chain tag-along) have three younger, identical copies show up….

It could be really weird cloning shenanigans. Now, it makes no sense that they’d make clones, and stagger their production like that, and leave them as babies on various planets for Jedi to find. IDK what reasons Obi-Wan would come up with for that, but it’s a fun little detour before he gets to time travel.

There's a really painful moment (for the audience, who know about canon Vader) where someone tries to convince Ahsoka to leave the Sith and she's just like "no way, they'd never hurt me!” Then she clarifies that “someone has to keep them from doing stupid Sith shit whenever they get bored, you know?"

A bunch of Jedi probably think she’s delusional, but the few that have seen her get into trouble that is legitimately too much for her, which isn't often, have then seen Anakin show up like the devil himself to save her, and it's like. Oh. This is why she isn't scared of them hurting her.

We’ve discussed how Anakin does get concerningly in character with the fake Sith thing. However, Anakin and Ahsoka are, just once in a while, surprised by how Ben gets sometimes when playing the bad guy.

After all, he stabbed a dude with a fork and threatened to eat him during his time as Hardeen…

He has the same dramatic streak as all the rest of the lineage. He can be vindictive and creepy and scary as fuck.

HOWEVER:

Obi-Wan: I know I'm supposed to be playing at evil right now, but how do we feel about me making that evil a little... fruity? Ahsoka: Fruity, master? Anakin, who knows where this is going: [buries face in hands] Obi-Wan: You know, the... [limp wrist] Ahsoka: ... Obi-Wan: I mean, I'm already bisexual and well-groomed, I can play it up.

What’s the point of being evil if you can’t be flamboyant?

Anyway, I had to put in a lot of thought for what to do with Rex and Cody, because there's a solid place for them in terms of strategy, but it doesn't do much to give them independent narrative arcs, and 'young Obi-Wan has a crush' isn't much of an arc, you know?

So, basic info first: Cody, Rex, and Anakin all hold the rank of General in this AU because, like... who else is gonna. Ahsoka remains a commander because everyone declares her Baby, and also to keep up the "I'm a morality chain" ruse.

Cody maintains a very stern and unyielding public persona, but the second they're behind closed doors, he's roughhousing with his little brother.

Rex has some fun pretending to be a sadist whenever he and Anakin have to team up, because hamming it up as an evil bastard in front of Jedi is actually really fun... but usually, he's a competent fucking professional.

Because here's the thing: someone has to be.

They both kind of hate the army they've gotten, because these people don't even have proper trigger discipline, let alone any actual discipline.

This army? Tragic. They hate it. Give them the clones.

They have to be drill sergeants for months before they have anything worth sending onto the field.

I think that might be how/when they end up reaching out to Jango. Like, the first inroad is absolutely "we're your clones from the future and you were a Shit Dad so you owe us," but then they actually talk him around into letting the Fake Sith hire him. He brings along all the Mandalorians he can get to answer his calls, and on suggestion from Those Mando Twins, joins the army Ben doesn't even want.

Darth Boring doesn't want an army! Unfortunately, Cody thinks that's stupid as hell, and is overruling Ben so they can actually work on this 'cleaning up the galaxy of slavery' thing with actual resources.

Cody and Rex are super competent, and it shows in their horrified disdain for the state of their troops.

Rex: Fucking natborns. Anyone who isn't in the know: What's a natborn? Rex: [leaves without answering] People: WHAT'S A NATBORN???

(I'm assuming that the word smush is harder to parse in Basic.)

I think young Obi-Wan's new crush on Cody should also be unrequited. Cody's just like... bemused. Very "Okay, then, that sure is an Affection you've decided on."

Cody and Anakin both: Sorry, it’d just be too weird. Obi-Wan: Why would it be too weird? Cody and Anakin: Reasons.

Rex has to deal with the "whyyyyy" from both his brother and his (former?) General.

Young Obi-Wan just likes cute boys that fight good! Is that so wrong???

Ahsoka: So since we're not officially Jedi anymore-- Obi-Wan: We're still Je-- Ahsoka: Can we date? Can I date now? I want to date someone before we go back to the Code. It's a classic life experience for most teenage girls, and I want to Have That Experience before we're back at the Temple. Obi-Wan: You're not... you can date, Ahsoka, that's not actually banned by the Code. I mean, you'd have to keep it casual, but-- Ahsoka: I CAN DATE!!!

(Great priorities, Ahsoka.)

An idea I'm toying with is that one of the clones ends up Legally Engaged to Satine for political reasons, and young Obi-Wan is just like ???? because not only can he not date the hot boys, but one of said hot boys has become Mr. Steal Yo Girl.

Young Obi-Wan is suffering, and Quinlan is the worst friend ever because Quinlan is laughing at him.

There is obviously the question of

"How would Satine ever end up agreeing to that, given what their public personas are like and all that? She puts duty ahead of personal feelings but all indications are that it’s a terrible decision both ways." (as stated by Tia)

Which, yes, I forgot to actually say that I was imagining Jango had declared "those twins" his heirs after telling people they were his younger* cousins. Because reasons.

* Jango is about 27 when they land in the past, and I’m going to say the accelerated aging ended after hitting physically twenty because no, I don’t want to deal with that. As far as anyone knows, Cody and Rex are about five years younger than Jango. They’re less than year apart, which isn’t very visible, and most people assume they’re identical twins (except Rex’s hair), and that Cody just looks slightly older because of the scar.

Darth Boring had convinced Satine that the way to keeping Mandalore peaceful was to work with Jango (because Darth Boring, which is not his actual title but it is what Ahsoka insists on calling him in private, has a vested interest in keeping Mandalore and all interested parties calm), and he... maybe accidentally set up a political marriage between her and one of the clones.

It wasn't on purpose! Satine never married in his timeline, okay, he didn't expect her to ever get married here, either! He didn't even suggest it! This just happened!

(I want to say that Cody would be more competent at having a political marriage? But IDK.)

Do I do the Satine thing? It has potential, but also it's a bit of a cop-out. Do I have Cody be a diplomatic representative for their pseudo-Sith empire? He could be, but I think he'd hate it. Do I have Rex date one the Chaos Entities (Anakin or Ahsoka), or is that too repetitive with my other works? THERE'S JUST TOO MUCH GOING ON.

Part of me wants Quinlan to get a crush on Cody, and the crush gets bigger specifically in response to the fact that Cody refuses to take him seriously and/or just doesn't give him the time of day.

Based on their one interaction in TCW, they probably let get along ok. Cody maybe likes him back, buuuuuuut internally he's just a little "you were tolerable at almost-forty; early twenties you is obnoxious."

Just imagine the absolutely puppyish attempts at gaining approval and Impressing The Hot Mando General. Quinlan keeps having vague daydreams of seducing someone to the side of the Light. He really leans into the bodice ripper fantasies of saving someone evil with the power of love! (And also the power of really good sex.)

Bant looks at Quin and Obi and wants to throw them both into the nearest pond because they're idiots, but on this topic they are the same flavor of idiot. She considers calling up Reeft and Garen to help her knock some sense into them.

Quinlan: Can I volunteer to go undercover to the Sith? The Council: No. Quinlan: ...what if I-- The Council: No.

Tholme tries to get Qui-Gon to commiserate over their Padawans getting obsessed with Hot Sith Boys, but Qui-Gon just finds the whole thing funny. He knows from the chats he has with Ben that Anakin feels so completely, utterly, incredibly awkward about all of this.

(Ben continues to hold to "Anakin brought this on himself.")

(Ben also “kidnaps” Qui-Gon a lot.)

Also, hey, at least Quinlan isn’t actually into hot Sith boys! He’s into hot Sith minions which is... probably a step up. At least Cody’s not a Sith himself!

It's a step in some direction but Tholme has no idea which one.

(Quinlan sees Cody in dress uniform once and just keeps the mental image for Ages. It’s in his dreams. Sometimes said dreams overflow to Tholme via Force Mind Magic and Quinlan wakes up to someone smacking his face with a pillow.)

Arguably, Quin's also a lot more romantic about his crush than Obi-Wan is, in this case. Quinlan: I want to save him... Obi-Wan: Hey, hey, cute boy. Look at me. Let’s bang.

Cody: There are currently two future Jedi generals having some form of absurd romantic fixation in my direction. I don't know how to feel about this. Rex: Bed them. Cody: ...I'm not saying that's not eventually an option, but one of them is the younger Kenobi, and I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that. Rex: Pat him on the head like a tooka and then bed his friend, it'll be funny.

I think the Quinlan thing and also general exasperation of leading an absolutely useless army can function pretty solidly as the basis for Cody, but I have another idea for Rex now.

Komari is currently brainwashed in a cult, yes? So.

I keep bouncing around back and forth on what to do with Rex, but part of me suddenly really likes the idea of, after Team Fake Sith finds and dissolves the cult (as one does), and takes Komari into custody (because she's dangerous and deeply unwell), Rex kind of ends up her touchstone to being a decent person. He’s not a morality chain, and it’s not really a redeemed-through-love thing, just This Is A Solid Dude who doesn't pity her or thinks she's irredeemable (however you choose to define such a thing), but actually relates to the kind of conditions living like that can involve, and just kind of...

I don’t know. I think Rex's arc in this AU could be very heavily grounded in something to the effect of "You're not the worst darksider I've met. You're not the only person who was in a cult. You're not even the only former Jedi I know that's committed awful, horrible crimes. My question is just this: What are you going to do moving forward?"

Later Anakin: Wait, who do we know that was in a cult? Rex: What did you think Kamino was?

(Rex isn't as chill as he'd like her to think, but he's trying, and she's fairly reliant on the Force to understand emotions, and is currently in nullifying cuffs, so he can bluff.)

Komari needs someone solid and dependable to rely on for at least conversation, and I think Rex needs to feel needed.

I’m not sure if it’d be romance or friendship, but I think there's a solid basis to work with, potentially.

Per Tia:

One thing about Rex and shipping is like. If you want to do Rexwalker again that's fine, but if you're worried about repetitiveness but still want to like. Ship him in a non-political-convenience way. Rexsoka here actually would be different than your other stuff.

I'm trying to figure out if I can make it work because Ahsoka thematically fits very much into a little sister shaped hole here? She feels younger than in other works, despite not actually being younger than she is in, say, Commander Buir. In those other fics, she has some time alone to function and prove herself independently of Anakin and Obi-Wan.

I usually pluck Ahsoka out at sixteen if I'm pulling her from TCW, so she's got most of her competence but hasn't gotten quite all the trauma yet. Commander Buir, in particular, also has baby-shaped Anakin for contrast.

That said, I can see a decent source of narrative conflict in her wanting to experiment with romance and all that, and Anakin trying to tell her she's too young.

A year into this whole time-travel mess, she wants to give the dating thing a shot, and it spirals into "You were only two years older than me when you got married!"

I think I could build a plot out of Ahsoka wanting to do these things, and Anakin as an audience insert not quite processing that she's old enough to make these decisions. If she's choosing to date Rex, whose age works out as being close to hers when one takes into account Kamino fuckery, and whom she trusts absolutely, it’s arguably extra weird for Anakin to be upset with it.

"Senator Amidala was five years older than you, and you married her when you were nineteen and had only really known her for a week! I can go on a date with a guy we both know is one of the most trustworthy people alive if I want, Skyguy!"

I can definitely see Ahsoka getting annoyed with Anakin being overbearing and controlling at some point before that unrelated to romance, too. It’s not exactly a new fault of his.

My god, just imagine someone snidely asking Anakin "where's your little shadow?" and Anakin, being Himself and also a Fake Sith, has an emotional breakdown about how Ahsoka yelled at him for micromanaging her and not trusting her to make her own decisions in life and so she got herself a multi-month solo mission from Ben that Anakin isn't allowed to know any details about, and--

It's another one of those "oh, you have PROBLEMS problems with your mental health" incidents for the Jedi to add to the file, because Anakin having emotionally charged rants about his issues at seemingly terrible times is how they get a lot of information.

Some of the rants are planned.

Many of them, actually.

They want the Jedi to know these things.

Just, well. Anakin.

He really is a little Like That.

On that note, I'm low-key imagining that Anakin gets put on mood stabilizers by the therapist in this context, and he's doing good! He's handling his issues! He's--been captured with Obi-Wan the Younger again and his medication was confiscated.

Anakin is... not great. He's a little out of practice managing his unmedicated self, and when adding withdrawal symptoms onto that... poor Anakin.

(Poor Obi-Wan.)

I think it would be best if Anakin makes a bunch of ominous blustery comments at their captors about how they won't like what's coming to them if they take his belongings (AKA the fanny pack that has his backup pills), and then Obi-Wan just gets to watch Anakin get more and more erratic, because like. Yes, Anakin is using the Force to compensate, but unfortunately he's mostly cut off, and the stress of the situation is pushing him away from depression and into the beginnings of a manic episode.

Anakin is aware of his issues to the point where he's mostly managing, and he keeps asking Obi-Wan "would it make sense for me to [slightly deranged, very impulsive action]," and Obi-Wan realizes he's being the morality sounding board for the Hot Sith because ??? reasons?????

Eventually, Anakin does flop back in bed and dramatically throws his arm over his eyes, and says he needs his meds back, he's absolutely going to lose it, and Obi-Wan tentatively asks what kind of medication. There are levels to worry about. Mild allergy medication is one thing, but heart medication that needs to be taken every four hours is another, you know? He wants to know how much panic is appropriate.

Anakin lets him know that it's Psychiatric In Nature. Obi-Wan suddenly realizes that he really, really, really doesn't want to know what a properly erratic, unmedicated Anakin is like.

(An unmedicated Anakin really isn't nearly as bad as Obi-Wan fears. Anakin's been dealing with this for a while, and knows what his issues are and some of how to deal with them. He'd need to be running on no sleep and higher levels of stress, or to have been drugged with something meant to increase his aggression, to really lose his shit and do something worthy of Vader. RotS levels of stress and sleep deprivation is required to pull RotS levels of manic paranoid delusion.)

Tia asked:

How long does it take the Jedi in general to catch on to how like. They have opportunities. But these Sith never seem to harm any Jedi. And it’s not just like, the past timeline parts of the disaster lineage. They probably get opportunities to hurt other Jedi. Ones that are less skilled at saber work. And more importantly ones that they don’t seem weirdly interested in."

I'm not sure, really. The Jedi don't spend as much time in the Outer Rim as they could, and that's where the Team operates, so actually running into them by accident is unlikely for anyone other than Shadows.

Fortunately, it's really easy to toy with Shadows with the excuse of "I want to see how long it takes before you Fall with us."

I do want like... okay. Here’s the mental image:

Qui-Gon calls them out on being Fake Sith pretty quickly, so Ben just sort of eyes him, dramatically, and orders out "Leave us" to all non-team people. The threat of torture is implied but not stated. He gestures with wine to keep in character. He definitely makes sure Young Obi-Wan is ushered out, so it's just five time travelers, Qui-Gon Jinn, and Ahsoka's immortal force birb.

"...so, what's the reason for the farce, Obi-Wan?" "How in all the hells did you figure it out so quickly?"

(Qui-Gon cheated a bit. He could feel the broken training bond that was never properly severed due to Traumatic Death Of A Master on Ben's end)

Ben didn't realize he'd feel it! Young Obi-Wan can't feel his older self or a training bond with Anakin or Ahsoka, so why could Qui-Gon?

IDK if there would be anything on the level of crying and hugging it out, but I think it would be very funny if, every time young Obi and Anakin are getting captured by pirates or something, Ben and Qui-Gon are just having a nice afternoon tea and checking their watches to see if their respective walking bundles of neuroses are done with their adventure yet.

The Council is So Done, because Qui-Gon continues to insist that they're Not That Bad, but every time anyone other than Qui-Gon brings up the friendship, Ben laughs and makes a comment about how absolutely gullible Master Jinn is.

Obi-Wan is skeptical of his own experiences with Anakin, at least, if only because he's skeptical about Anakin's everything.

"I don't know if Vader is telling me the truth. I don't know if he's telling himself the truth. I don't think he's a great source of information even when he thinks he's being honest."

Anakin could tell Obi-Wan the full and complete truth, and Obi-Wan would worriedly put a hand to his forehead and start doing tests for hallucinations and paranoid delusions. In his defense, this is a very reasonable assumption to make with an individual like Anakin. It's just also not accurate, this time. I don’t know if Anakin hallucinates in canon without a weird inciting incident like Force Nonsense or getting drugged by the enemy, but paranoid delusion is pretty much all of RotS.

"I’m your time-traveling padawan who’s pretending to be a Sith to catch some other Sith who’re going to start a galactic civil war and those Mandalorians you like are from a clone army based on a template of Jango Fett made to serve the Jedi (because that’s totally something he’d sign up for), and one of the Sith is your grandmaster but he doesn’t seem to have fallen yet, it’s probably fine," is hard to believe.

Honestly, even if he seemed stable before saying that, which he doesn’t, it’s all real far fetched. There's a lot going on and Obi-Wan wouldn't even begin to believe it without evidence.

I've had it in my head that he and Bant and Quinlan have been gossiping about the mess for months if not years about these idiots, and at one point it became common knowledge that Ben was a Kenobi, and Bant convinced them (since the two were among the most likely in the entire Order to encounter the Fake Sith) to get a DNA sample, probably hair or blood since that's easiest so they can figure out HOW these two are related, if they are, and then there's a whole big thing.

Bant: No, no, this must be contaminated, it's coming up as Obi-Wan! Are you sure you didn't accidentally grab some of your own hairs? I know it's a little long for most of your hair, but the braid-- Quinlan: Wait, they keep claiming stuff about cloning, right? Maybe someone's a clone? Check for artificial telomeres! Bant: ...okay, so, there aren't any artificial telomeres, but the ones from apparently-Ben are... a lot shorter... um... I don't know what to do with this. It's like I have two samples from the same person, twenty years apart. Quinlan: Obi-Wan, what's that face? Why are you-- Obi-Wan: Vader told me he was a time-traveler. I thought it was the fever talking, but...

That’s how he finds out that Ben is future-him before finding out about how he’s not evil!

"Master Jinn... I think... I think the Sith controlling the Outer Rim is me from the future." "Oh, you finally figured it out?" "I AM HAVING A CRISIS HERE."

Obi-Wan, after a few hours of dazed realization, runs screaming to Quinlan and Bant like 'GUYS GUYS THIS EXPLAINS WHY VADER KEPT SAYING IT WAS WEIRD AND THAT I LOOK LIKE HIS MASTER AND THAT IT WOULD BE LIKE DATING HIS DAD.'

You know, the important stuff.

I think Qui-Gon tells him that Ben isn't evil because, like, That Sure Is A Crisis Obi-Wan's Having. He could hold off for shits and giggles, sure, but Obi-Wan’s on the edge of something Really Concerning, mentally. Best help calm him down on at least one or two things.

Obi-Wan’s maybe still a little skeptical until he confronts them over it. Because their Sith act was real good and also like. Maybe Qui-Gon just wants to believe the best of his Padawan, y’know?

Quinlan runs into Ben before Obi-Wan does, after this whole mess, and gets to observe as money changes hands and people act like sore winners about bets made for When Does Obi-Wan Figure It Out.

Anakin was saying 'soon' because he really didn't think the fever-fueled rant would be discounted as easily as it was.

Cody was of the opinion that it would take at least a few more years since they're actually pretty damn good at this whole schtick.

Quinlan: Wow, he's... going to be really disappointed that you have such a low opinion of his intelligence. Cody, gesturing at Ben: Experience. Darth Ben: ಠ_ಠ

Cody just rattles off some of the Extremely Stupid Shit that Ben's done in their time working together.

Rex cheerily offers up "You didn't even realize General Skywalker was married, sir! And they weren't subtle!" "I knew they were together, I just didn--" "Everyone knew they were together, sir. Everyone."

(Rex had the lowest opinion of their deductive capabilities. He claims it would have taken until Baby Ahsoka showed up at the Jedi Temple.)

-Once Obi-Wan accepts that they're decent people after all- Obi-Wan: Wow, Anakin, you're real good at acting unhinged! Anakin: Haha. Yeah. Thanks?

[darcyfangirlsfrequently]

Two Can Play at this Game

@snailsandpuppy-dogtails @dungeons-are-too-cold @penelopeminded this one is for you my homies

Summary: At a family dinner, Penelope is asked if she's seeing anyone. She says she is, and she starts going on this loving rant about him. Little does everyone else know, he's sitting right beside her, and Luke is having a hard time not blowing their cover.

Words: 1304

Rated: T for language and implied sexual content

Can also be read here on Ao3

After two weeks of practically back to back cases, the team decided that it was time for a family dinner. When Penelope left they had decided to make family dinners something they did as often as they could, their way of staying together when they were apart.

“So, Penelope,” Rossi said. “It’s been so long since we’ve actually gotten to talk to you. What’s going on in your life? How’s work? Are you seeing anyone?”

“Work is great,” she replied. And then, before she could talk herself out of it, she said, “And yes, I actually have been seeing someone for a few months now.”

Luke, who was sitting right next to her, choked on his drink. Fortunately, he wasn’t the only one, so it didn’t look suspicious.

“For months?” JJ repeated. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Sorry, JJ,” Reid said. “You kept Will a secret for how long?”

“Point taken.”

“So what’s his name?” Tara asked.

“No.”

“No? That’s an interesting name,” Emily joked.

“Shut up. I mean, no, I’m not telling you his name. I don’t want you guys to track him down to the ends of the earth before we’ve decided if we want you guys to meet him.” Plus, she wanted to drive Luke crazy, but she couldn’t very well tell them that, now could she?

“Quite understandable,” Rossi told her. She knew he would understand, considering he had kept Krystall a secret from them almost until he proposed.

“Well can you at least tell us about him?” Matt asked. “No name, no identifying information, just general stuff? You can’t say, oh yeah I’m dating someone and then give us nothing!”

She considered this for a moment. “Alright, sure. Let me just think over what I’m going to say so I don’t accidentally give some identifying information to you pesky profilers.”

Luke had no idea how he was going to survive what was to come.

“Well, I mean first of all, he’s gorgeous, like, absolutely the most beautiful man I’ve ever met in my entire life.”

“Don’t let Morgan hear you say that,” Luke quipped in an attempt to seem neutral.

“Oh please, he knows where he stands.”

There was a hidden message in there just for him, and he had to fight back his smile.

“Anyways,” she continued. “He’s really good with animals, he loves Sergio, they’re cuddle buddies.”

“I like this new man of yours already,” Emily said, taking a sip of her wine.

Well that’s a relief, Luke thought.

“And he’s so kind. Just… the sweetest, very romantic. He took me to a restaurant that had slow dancing for our first date.”

Luke had to take a sip of his drink to hide his smile of pride.

A soft smile spread on Penelope’s face. “He’s just… so completely great.”

“Oh my god,” JJ said. “You’re in love with him.”

“What?” Penelope squeaked. “In love? Why would you say that?”

Luke couldn’t help himself. “That, Penelope, is called a non-denial denial.”

If looks could kill, he’d be dead. “Watch yourself, Newbie.”

“Can you even call me that anymore? We haven’t worked together in months.” I mean and we’ve been dating since then and you’ve just kind of admitted you’re in love with me, but I’m not going to say that right now.

“JJ’s right, though,” Reid said. “When you were talking about him your pupils dilated and you got this smile on your face. You’re in love with him.”

Penelope’s blush was fierce. That was absolutely not how she planned on telling Luke she loved him for the first time. “Fine, yes, I’m in love with him, next question?”

“Have you told him yet?” JJ asked.

“No. I mean, it’s still kind of new, and I don’t know if he feels the same way… I don’t want to scare him off, you know?”

That broke Luke’s heart a bit, both the fact that she thought he’d leave her for telling him she loved him and that she had no idea how completely in love with her he was.

“Have you kissed him?” Emily asked in an attempt to make the topic lighter again.

“Yes.”

“Was it good?”

“The best.”

Luke had to take multiple deep breaths to keep himself from turning around and making out with her in front of the entire team.

Tara got a cheeky grin on her face. “Have you slept with him yet?”

Luke wanted to die, but fortunately, Rossi came to the rescue. “Ah ah ah, that is a conversation for girls’ night, not my dinner table.”

Tara cackled, and Luke and Penelope were doing their absolute best to not look at each other.

“Well,” Emily said. “Anyone else have a secret relationship they want to tell us about?”

Well, two can play at this game. “Yeah, actually.”

Everyone stared at Luke. “Wait, seriously?”

“Yeah. I’ve been seeing her for a few months now, and I haven’t said anything because no one in this group can keep their mouths shut, goddamn.”

"If you're talking about me, Luke Alvez, that's very rude," Penelope told him.

Actually, you're the one person I'm not talking about. "No, no, I'm not talking about everyone. I didn't want them to try to profile or weasel it out of me because once I start talking about her, I can't stop and I know I'd let it slip."

"Well then tell us about her," Reid said. "Since you can't stop."

"Gladly. She's the most amazing and kind-hearted person I have ever met in my entire life. She is Jesus Christ you are miles and miles out of my league, how the fuck did I end up with you, gorgeous, inside and out. She loves Roxy, and I think Roxy likes her more than me. When she smiles she gets this sparkle in her eyes that doesn't go away for hours and it's my favorite thing in the world. And she's funny, always making me laugh, and like, ridiculously smart."

"What the hell is she doing with you, then?" Tara teased.

"I have no idea, but I'm never letting her go. I am so fucking in love with her it's not even funny. Like, completely gone."

Out of the corner of his eye he could see Penelope trying not to react. "And she loves you?" It was like an echo of one of their first conversations. He was talking about Roxy, she thought he was talking about his girlfriend. This time, however, there was a double meaning. The rest of the team heard and she loves you? A teasing question, typical of their usual banter. He heard and she loves you. A declaration. A promise.

"Yeah, she does."

"Tell her to call me when she comes to her senses."

He laughed. "Yeah, I will. You'd love her, I think. She's always giving me crap. Sometimes I think she's only dating me for Roxy and my culinary skills."

Matt scoffed at that. "What culinary skills?" 

"I make a mean lasagna."

"It's true, he does," Penelope agreed. "Vegetarian, too."

Everyone, including Luke, turned to stare at her with wide eyes. While their expressions were varying levels of shock, his was sheer amusement. Had they really just done that whole song and dance for her to go and say that?

She looked back at them, blinking in confusion. "What?"

JJ smiled a bit, trying to hold in her laughter. "When did he make you vegetarian lasagna?"

Penelope's eyes went wide as she realized what she said, and wider still at the (correct) implications. "Oh. Um. I." She turned to Luke. "I can't explain my way out of this, can I?"

He smiled affectionately at her and took her hand in this. "No, Love, I don't think you can."

She blushed at the nickname and turned back towards the group. "So, his name is Luke…"