#'What do?' is the big question of our times

[sc0tters]

Lessons in Bed | Nico Hischier & Luke Hughes

summary: when luke tells you his ex left him for his skills in bed, it's only right that you and your boyfriend give him a lesson he'd never forget

request: yes/no

warnings: sexual themes, threesome, swearing, unprotected sex, oral (f and m receiving!)

word count: 6.19k

authors note: this is the first time I have written a sub pairing, not entirely sure how i feel about it but it is definetly something that needs improvement so sorry about that... nevertheless this is a threesome that had no help on it and the last time we did that was like our first threesome. dom nico in this was something i could get used to 🤭

Parties at your place always seemed to go off a hit. 

Everyone loved the atmosphere of the apartment as they spoke or drank. The playlist you created was also always just what the environment needed to be perfect. Which is why you were so surprised to see him missing from the group. 

Luke Hughes had been someone you knew from the moment he had moved to New Jersey. Being Nico’s girlfriend meant that you knew all of the guys and oftentimes you were helping them settle in. Which was why you were so surprised when Luke was missing, this had always been more of his scene especially after college. 

Nico could see that your mind looked as if it was anywhere else “you okay schatz?” He called out over the music, letting his mouth hover close to your ear. 

You nodded as you sent him a smile “just looking for Luke.” You responded in the same tone as he took the chance to look “think he is in the kitchen?” Nico remembered seeing him in there when he got you a new drink. 

Nico’s hand went up to hold yours “you want me to come with?” His question made you smile “you don’t have to Neeks.” You shook your head before you planted a kiss on his cheek. 

Of course that meant he was coming with you, interlacing your hand with his before he made his way to the kitchen, always careful to not lose you in the crowd. Just like the captain had predicted, Luke stood in the kitchen staring at his drink. 

It made your lips form a pout “Lukey what are you doing in here?” His head shot up as he placed his phone in his pocket “just thinking.” The words were a blatant lie, clearly highlighted by the way his eyes avoided both you and Nico. 

You dropped Nico’s hand “y’know you can talk to either of us about anything.” Your voice was sweet while you made your way over to the youngest Hughes boy “it’s embarrassing.” Luke shook his head watching you both come further into the kitchen. 

Nico had to admit that he always thought Luke had some kind of crush on you, big or small, he knew it was there “you know we won’t judge you.” He added, crossing his arms “my girlfriend broke up with me.” His words made a soft laugh escape from your lips. 

You placed your hand on his shoulder “baby that’s nothing to be ashamed of,” you shook your head letting your lips form a frown “she did it because I wasn’t good in.” Luke let his head dip back to where your bedrooms were. 

It took Nico much longer to figure out what the boy was saying than you “that’s completely normal!” You scoffed knowing that you had a good reason for not liking her “it is?” Luke had this sad look on his face that made you curse his now ex for hurting him like this. 

Nico watched you run your fingers through the Americans hair “yeah like when we first started dating Nico wasn’t the best.” Nico knew all about the ways he needed to improve in the bedroom as you were his first serious relationship, so the lessons from hook ups were going to do him no good “he wasn’t?” Luke couldn’t believe that about his captain, the man who was usually so calm and collected who wore your scratches and hickies like a badge of honour was once bad in bed? 

Nico nodded, pushing his hair out of his face “but my girl turned out to be a damn good teacher and now I know all her spots.” Nico smirked as he leaned against the kitchen counter “you thinking what I’m thinking?” You asked Nico wanting to get his permission to offer it to the younger boy first.

The two of you had agreed that a threesome was something neither one of you was totally against, and in fact it was pretty high on both of your wish lists “Hughesy you promise you can keep this a secret f’me?” Your voice was sickly sweet in his ear as he nodded “promise.” Nico had to smirk at the way the boy was so desperate for your immediate praise. 

It made you smile that he was so responsive “how would you like us to show you how it’s done?” Your offer made him squirm “want to know what it feels like to fuck a girl properly?” Luke couldn’t help it when a moan escaped from his lips. 

You looked down to see that a bulge had formed in his jeans “I’m sorry.” He went to apologise but you and Nico were having none of that “Lukey it is natural.” You shook your head not worrying about it. 

That seemed to calm him down “can you teach me?” He didn’t know who he was really asking as you both nodded “when the party is over why don’t you stay and we can start?” Nico couldn’t help but laugh seeing how the Hughes boy’s face dropped at your words. 

Having to wait for at least an hour seemed like torture to him “Luke trust me.” Nico placed his hand on the boys shoulder “with the way my girl moans you’re gonna want us three to be the only ones here.” The captain explained, not missing how your cheeks turned red hearing his words. 

Luke swore he his heart pounded in his ears as he waited for the party to finish “you know where Luke is?” Jack asked looking down at his phone seeing that the boy had not responded to any of his messages “I am pretty sure he left with some girl.” Nico lied wrapping his arm around your waist. 

He looked to you to back him up “yeah Jack, I am so sorry he told me to tell you but I forgot.” The way you made it so convincing should have made Nico feel bad but it did anything but that “no worries.” Jack sighed pushing his phone back into his pocket. 

The Center sent you both a smile “have a good night.” You and Nico waved him off, feeling like you couldn’t get rid of him quickly enough “you sure you want to do this neeks?” You asked letting the door shut behind you. 

Your question made your boyfriend freeze “I do but only if it is something you’re comfortable with.” He looked to you for reassurance, not wanting to push you into something you didn’t want “I do Nico.” You nodded, pushing onto your tippy toes to kiss him. 

It made Nico smile “and besides watching you teach someone all I’ve taught you is gonna be like really hot.” Your words made him laugh “is that what you’re thinking about tonight?” He asked as your cheeks turned a shade of pink, meaning he was right. 

The captain pulled you into another kiss, wanting a moment just between the two of you before Luke got involved again “behave mister.” You warned feeling Nico’s hand squeeze your ass. 

It made him laugh as he raised his hands in surrender “apologises madam.” Nico teased watching you look for Luke “Luke baby!” You called out watching him walk out of the bathroom. 

His hands were in his hoodie pocket “hi.” His voice was quiet “you ready for this?” You asked him walking up to the boy. 

He didn’t want to admit it but god did you smell amazing “because if you want to leave at any time just say the words and we will end it.” You wanted Luke to know that even if you and Nico were teaching him, he had just as much power as the two of you did. 

Luke nodded “don’t want to go.” His words made you smile “now you said she didn’t like how you were in the bedroom?” You wanted to know where he needed your help, and if it was everywhere then you and Nico were happy to do that. 

The boy looked nervous “this is a safe space.” Nico reiterated the fact that you guys could all trust each other and that the events of the night would not be shared “she didn’t like anything.” Those words made your heart break for him. 

And it was clear that he could see that “can we like not talk about it.” He scratched the back of his neck not wanting sympathy from you as he was just going to feel embarrassed “kiss me.” Luke felt his eyes go wide at your words “c’mon Luke we have to start somewhere.” He nodded dropping his head down as he hit your nose with his. 

It caused a hiss to leave your lips as your eyes screwed shut, if you weren’t meant to be helping him Nico would have laughed “Luke bud you’re going about it all wrong.” Nico clicked his tongue hooking his finger into your jeans belt loop to pull you back to him “first you got to have some direction.” The captain spoke in a duh tone, placing his hands on your cheeks. 

His eyes were always such a warm place to you “and then you can look where you’re going before you get there.” He dropped his head to the point where his lips hovered over yours “some girls love it when you look between their eyes and their lips for a second.” Nico smirked seeing your smile as he was talking about you. 

You nodded “and then you can show her you’re in charge but don’t take her teeth out.” Your words were quiet as Nico kissed you. His tongue dragged across your lower lip, pulling you into a trance that made you whimper when he pulled away. 

It stroked his ego as he turned back to Luke “and don’t forget that you can move your hands around her body as you’re making out.” With that suggestion Nico stepped away, motioning to Luke to step into his place “just relax okay.” You were too good to Nico, Luke swore to himself. 

His hands rested right where Nico’s were before “hi.” He whispered looking at how beautiful you looked this close up. Luke’s lips were rougher than Nico’s as his tongue found its way into your mouth. 

It was a clear improvement as the boy also breathed from his nostrils while he let one hand travel to your ass and the other to your tits. He gave them a squeeze that made you moan, allowing him to deepen the kiss. 

Nico almost had to admit that he felt a little jealous seeing you all like that with someone else, he knew your body was responsive so he should have known it would end like this. As you pulled away from Luke his teeth softly tugged at your lower lip “think Lukey boy is a fast learner.” Nico teased the boy, seeing how your eyes were wide staring at the boy. 

Luke saw your frazzled state “should we move you to the bedroom?” Nico asked placing his hand in the back of your neck before he kissed you again. The American had to admit that watching how your boyfriend knew how to elicit the right reaction out of you, was hot. 

You smiled seeing Luke again “yeah.” You nodded taking his hand in yours while Nico lead the way. The room was one Luke had never seen before, always feeling like your bedroom was far too private for him to impose on “you like the place?” You asked running your finger along his jawline. 

Luke nodded “y-yeah.” His breath caught in his throat seeing the mischievous look on your face “so how do you finger a girl?” Nico’s question made you laugh. 

He rolled his eyes “I’m serious schatz we don’t even know if he knows where your clit or where your erogenous zones are.” Luke’s eyebrows furrowed proving that Nico had some ground to be right “like with her here her most sensitive zones are behind her ears.” Nico pressed a kiss against the back of your ear before he softly sucked on your earlobe making you moan. 

The captain smirked before he pulled away, making sure that Luke was still watching “her scalp.” His fingers ran through your hair making you squirm in the process “god wait until you get to play with these.” Nico couldn’t help but grunt when he gave your boobs a squeeze. 

Luke watched on in awe “and when I’m eating her out I’ll kiss the back of her knees and all down her thighs making sure she’s ready.” Luke nodded watching you look at Nico “Neeks think we should show him now.” Your words came with you pulling your top off. 

Your red bra complimented your skin “even though you are focusing on my cunt doesn’t mean that you can’t acknowledge my top half too.” You explained as you begin to kiss Luke again, but this time your lips didn’t stay on his for long, wanting to find his own sensitive zones. 

Nico unbuttoned your jeans as you sucked at Luke’s neck, drawing a moan from his lips “think we found it.” You licked your lips, stepping out of your jeans to reveal a matching set of underwear to the bra “fuck.” Luke whimpered letting his eyes screw shut. 

It made you let out a whine “Lukey baby I want you to feel me okay?” You asked taking his hand when he nodded “you feeling how wet I am through these?” You placed his hand against the wet patch on your panties. 

His knees almost buckled at the feeling when his eyes shot open “schatz stop teasing him and let him have a taste.” Nico’s words made you pout. But still you listened to your boyfriend and lay on the bed for both boys to see “why don’t you take her bra off?” Nico motioned to Luke to join you on the bed. 

It made the boy look to you like he was asking for your permission “I don’t bite.” You giggled seeing Nico raise his eyebrows, oh you definitely do. Luke brought his hand up behind you and unsnapped the bra with ease catching both you and Nico by surprise “did I do something wrong?” Luke grew nervous as he looked between the two of you. 

You shook your head, letting the bra fall to the bed “not many guys can do that with such ease.” You confessed going to kiss him again “schatz if you keep on kissing him he isn’t going to learn anything.” Nico teased you as he sat on the bench of your vanity watching the scenario unfold in front of him. 

Luke kissed at your shoulder “thought I was just being used to teach him.” You shot back sending him an amused grin as your fingers tugged at Luke’s curls “don’t start something you aren’t ready to keep up.” Nico warned getting up as he wasn’t going to let you be a brat. 

You smirked watching him look at Luke “c’mere Hughes she wants her pussy fucked.” The words made you press your legs together as Nico forced them open again “get her panties off.” Nico ordered making Luke nod. 

He followed the orders, slotting in between your legs “can you lift?” Luke asked making you push your thighs into the air so that he could take your panties off “shit.” The boy let out a low whistle finally pulling them off of your feet. 

Nico smirked at the sight that he loved so much “you want to show us what you normally do?” The captain sat on your side of the bed. Luke got himself comfortable between your legs while he went to spit on his fingers “why don’t you get her to do that?”Nico motioned to you as it always made you horny. 

Luke looked to you as you leaned forward, wrapping your lips around his fingers “fuck.” The Hughes boy let out a grunt feeling your tongue swirl around his digits “now start out easy with two.” Luke watched how your eyes screwed shut feeling his fingers thrust into your cunt. 

Your cunt stretched against his fingers “you want to get her ready so do this.” Nico did this scissoring motion with his fingers when he sat behind you. Your back rested against his chest “shit.” You moaned showing Luke that he was doing the right thing. 

You let your hips meet his thrusts “play with her clit.” Nico brushed your hair out of your face before he kissed at your neck. 

His eyes watched the Hughes boy totally miss your clit “you see this?” Nico asked taking his thumb as he rubbed against your sensitive bud, your head pressed against his shoulder as your boyfriend hit the right spot “if you’re just fingering her you want to do it like this.” Nico kissed your ear heading your breathing grow heavy. 

Your skin grew warm seeing two boys play with your cunt “but if you’re fucking her.” You watched Nico move his focus to the pads of his fingers on your clit which more pace “wanna try?” Your chest heaved using all of your energy to look at Luke. 

He nodded using his thumb like the older boy had “ain’t he a good listener?” Nico cooed watching how your hands tried to reach for your breasts, desperate to play with your sensitive peaks “Lukey think it’s time you use something different to make her feel good.” Nico’s suggestion came as he held your hands, stopping you from playing with your breasts. 

Luke watched the captain as he knew the suggestion came with some logic as you started to appear as if you were close. So Luke listened he retracted his fingers from your cunt watching in awe as he saw how your cunt glistened. 

You whimpered at the loss of contact “schatz don’t be a brat or else you won’t cum tonight.” The younger boy was surprised that someone could have the power over someone else, to have the ability to withhold a human reaction. 

Nico pulled away from behind you, setting you back flat on the bed “I love you.” He pressed his lips against your shoulder before he turned his attention to Luke “you gotta go gentle first.” His voice soothed you. 

You ran your fingers up your skin “please Lukey.” You begged, wishing that the boy would hurry up “baby be patience for him.” Nico clicked his tongue reminding you that tonight was meant to be for you to teach Luke, tomorrow Nico could have you screaming until your throat felt raw if you wanted it. 

Luke took this deep breath as if it was going to sooth his nerves. His head hovered over your cunt “uh uh Luke.” Nico shook his head, stopping the boy in the process “having sex isn’t just about fucking her pussy remember?” The captain ran his fingers along the inside of your thighs making you squirm. 

The Hughes boy nodded remembering about what you told him in the living room “there we go.” Nico smiled watching Luke kiss at the inside of your thighs. 

For someone who didn’t know what he was doing, he was methodical. Luke seemed to kiss you in the way that he divided his attention equally between your thighs, always hovering just close enough to your cunt that you swore he was finally going to start, but he never did. His eyes studied yours as he finally stopped “please Luke.” You begged feeling him place an open mouthed kiss on your cunt. 

It made you grip at the sheet beneath you “occasionally focus on fucking her with your tongue too.” The suggestion was ignored by the boy as he brought his fingers that he had used to now focus on your weeping hole “fuck baby.” You moaned looking at Nico who couldn’t help but smile. 

Luke found himself settling into a perfect rhythm, occasionally looking back up at you “please Lukey.” You begged wanting more as he inserted another finger into your cunt “this greedy slut likes it when you do this.” Nico showed the boy how to turn his fingers into this come hither motion to get deeper into your cunt. 

The Hughes boy sent him what was only a glance before he listened, turning his attention to you in order to ensure it was working. His fingers grazed your g-spot, causing your body to jolt “there we go Lukey boy.” Nico praised the boy making Luke moan. 

Luke almost slotted into the motions, bringing his free hand up to cup your breast. His fingers rolled your nipple between them, tugging at the peak “don’t stop.” You shook your head feeling your thighs begin to shake “she’s gonna finish and you want that right?” Nico pushed Luke with the encouragement that it worked like a wildfire. 

His lips sucked at your clit, swirling his tongue around the bud “fuck yeah.” Luke spoke against your cunt sending shivers through your body “c’mon schatz let him see what it’s like to have a pretty girl cum on your tongue.” Nico cooed drawing circles on your shoulder with his thumb. 

Luke didn’t relent, letting your moans bounce off of the walls making him feel like a moth to a flame “shit Lukey please don’t stop.” Tears threatened to spill from your eyes as your body shook “right there a-a-ahhh.” Your eyes screwed shut when your cunt clenched around his fingers while your body spasmed. 

White specks cast over the black that your eyelids brought upon you “oh god oh god!” You chanted as Luke helped you ride through your orgasm. But then it turned into him just being hungry, as he continued to lap at your release “no Lukey.” You tugged at his hair, wanting to pull him off of you. 

He let you kiss him, tasting your sweet release on his tongue made you feel lightheaded bringing him back onto you as you lay on the bed felling his boner that his shorts did little to hide, graze against your cunt “shit.” You gasped feeling your eyes widen. 

Luke laughed against your shoulder, echoing your same emotions “doll why don’t you thank him for treating ya?” Nico’s words made you nod. You rolled out from under the boy as you patted the bed for him “sit.” You ordered him. 

The boy obliged seeing the hunger in your eyes “you gonna let me taste ya?” You asked running your hand over the material of his shorts “please.” Luke whimpered, feeling his cock push to your hand. 

Nico remembered what it was like to be in that position because you had this power to turn him into putty, and that’s what caused him to raise a smack to your ass “ah!” You whimpered almost jumping out of your skin at the sensation “don’t be mean and tease him schatz.” The captain clicked his tongue sending you an unimpressed look. 

It made you frown turning to him with a pout “fine.” You huffed reaching for the waistband of Luke’s shorts “gonna lift up for me pretty boy?” You asked causing him to push his hips up into the air, allowing you to tug at his shorts bringing them down with his boxers. 

His cock ached for some attention, for you “god.” He moaned watching you run your thumb over the swollen head. The precum oozed out of it working as some kind of shitty variation of lube. You let your eyes lock onto his as you pooled your saliva in your mouth before you let it drop into his cock. 

Luke swore he was dreaming as he watched you do these little kitten licks against his cock. Nico stood behind you dropping his pants as he pumped his cock once and then a second time “you gonna let him fuck your mouth while I fuck your cunt maus?” You moaned at the thought when you nodded. 

Nico dragged the head of his cock along your slit wanting to not let his teammate get all of the fun that you could give “shit schatz.” Nico moaned feeling your cunt hug his cock, your walls stretching to accommodate him. 

As a moan went to escape from your lips you let your lips wrap around Luke’s cock. The warmth your mouth provided made Luke almost fall forward “yeah dude she sucks dick like a slut.” Nico laughed watching your hand massage Luke’s balls. 

Your cunt squelched as your previous orgasm was more than enough in terms of lube for Nico’s cock to throb with some thrusts “but that is what you love, huh?” Nico taunted you, as the feeling of your cunt clenching around him was not something that he failed to miss. Your words of agreement were muffled, but when your head bobbed with Lukes’s cock hitting your throat, it was clear what you were thinking “cap if she was mine I wouldn’t share.” Luke almost didn’t realise the line he walked on, he was dangerously close to pissing Nico off if he continued saying shit like this then Nico was more than likely going to take it out on your cunt. 

And you could already feel him doing it; his fingers pinched at your thighs “part of having a girl.” Nico grumbled, watching Luke grab your hair into a makeshift ponytail “is knowing when to listen.” Nico would never have dreamed of offering this to Luke, but you did, and Nico couldn’t say no to you.

You moaned wanting to let out a giggle if it had been a more appropriate time “glad you did.” Luke confessed, watching you look up at him through your now ruined mascara “good teachers.” He felt your throat gag around his cock making him grunt. The moment of silence made Nico smirk, finally having the boy shut up was the real stroke to his ego.

Luke squirmed beneath your touch, feeling your cheeks hollow out with your tongue swirling around the underside of his cock.

Nico thrust into you with such pace that the sound of your skin slapping against his echoed throughout the apartment, you were sure of it “fuck Neeks.” You let your lips pop from Lukes cock, quickly replacing your mouth with your hand “you wanna cum sweet girl?” He didn’t even need to wait for you to answer before he moved his hand to rub against your clit “please.” You begged feeling your legs begin to shake as Nico had to also keep you from collapsing.

You continued to focus on fucking the younger boys cock in your hand “thrust your hips baby.” You cooed sending Luke a nod “I-i can’t.” Luke shook his head, not sure if he had the energy to complete the task. 

Nico hissed feeling you clench around his cock, almost making him forget how to breathe “when you get told to do something Luke, you do it no?” Nico used his captains tone that made you rest your head on Luke’s thigh “schatz look at him when he finally behaves.” He made you pull your head off of Luke’s thigh as his fingers tugged at your hair.

Luke watched your eyes open as he saw how Nico held you up with his hands in your hand. He felt overcome by pleasure, just needed that little bit more as he begun to push his hips into your hand. 

Nico nodded with a grunt as his tongue ran across his teeth “ain’t he a good boy schatz.” You let out this harsh whimper “such a good boy.” Your coos sent Luke over the edge causing sticky ropes of his release to shoot into your hand. 

Tears formed in his waterline “please.” Luke shook his head, not sure that he could take much more, thinking that he was already feeling hard again “you want her to cum?” Nico quizzed the boy who nodded. 

Luke could see the desperation on your face “tell her that.” The captain ordered his teammate “fuck doll.” Luke coughed feeling your hand finally slow on his cock. 

The Hughes boy had to think about his words “wanna see you make a mess okay?” Your tits throbbed as your cunt clenched hearing those words “you think that you can do that f’me?” Luke used his fingers to roll your nipples between them, causing your moans to sound like music in your ears.

Nico didn’t know how much longer he could take “c’mon liebling, show him how pretty you look when you cum on a cock.” Those words sent you over the edge 

Your eyes screwed shut as your head dropped when Nico let your hair go “fucking hell.” As you came around his cock it caused his own orgasm to come on “just like that.” Nico bit down on his lower lip as his head fell back, slowing his thrusts down before he pulled his cock out. 

The captain rubbed his thumb in these soft circles against the hip, watching how his release oozed out of your cunt. Trickling down your slit to your clit “you got one more in ya?” It was the first coherent sentences that you could form in a while “me?” Luke asked blinking heavily. 

Nico let out a snort as he turned your head so he could kiss you “I sure as shit know she wasn’t talking to me.” Nico pointed out, knowing that he could last for at least three rounds “schatz show him how good this cunt feels.” The captain stared at Luke as he cupped your pussy. 

Luke felt his mouth water at the sight of you letting out another moan “I don’t think I can fuck you.” The boy shook his head feeling like his legs were jelly “who said I couldn’t ride ya?” You tapped his legs motioning to him to set his legs straight. 

His eyes shut as the image became too strong in his mind “you can say no Lukey.” You reminded him of his rights as you sat on your heels in front of him “no I want to.” He was quick to shake his head, sending you a smile. 

You nodded, watching him pull you onto his lap. His legs pushed you up “you sure?” Nico had to smile from the corner of your bed where he sat, hearing how you were still making sure that he was comfortable “yeah I am.” Luke took the chance to kiss you. 

His tongue past your lips making you mewl at the contact. Your hand found its way between the two of you “off.” You tugged at his hoodie now wanting him naked too. 

Luke listened, letting your hands do the work as you brought it up to his chest before you pulled away, “just taking it off.” You smirked hearing him whimper at the loss of contact. 

His cheeks turned red, feeling grateful that his hoodie being pulled off of his head did a lot to hide the initial warmth that spread to his cheeks “such a pretty boy.” You cooed letting a grin form on your lips as you drank in the sight of his now messy curls. 

Your hand went back down between the two of you so you could grab his cock, your hands were delicate, softly palming him “please.” Luke rested his head against your headboard, feeling you lazily drive the head of his cock across your slit. Nico began to palm at himself, enjoying the view from behind “fuck him schatzi.” Nico clicked his tongue, growing irritated at the teasing.

You sank onto his cock letting your nails tense around his shoulders, he wasn’t as thick as Nico but Luke’s cock made your cunt hug his walls differently “move please.” Luke softened his grip around your hips “such a polite boy.” You nodded, slowly moving your hips seeing his eyes look back at you. 

He studied your face, noticing every little beauty spot and imperfection that made you, well, you. It made him smile when he realised that your eyes had been locked on his “you feel yourself?” You asked bringing his hand onto your lower stomach and making him press his into your skin. 

Luke was more impressed that he could get that deep than anything else “shit you’re perfect.” The compliment made Nico nod, agreeing that the boy was indeed not stupid “I am gonna fuck you now okay?” You asked the boy, bringing your legs to either side of him so that you could properly work yourself on his cock, knowing that you were not going to last for long. 

And judging by how he watched you like a cat who found a warm spot on a winter day, Luke was excited for you to continue. Your one hand rested on his thigh behind you as the other gripped at his shoulder while you brought your cunt up and down his cock. Careful to never fully pull off of him before you slammed back down feeling his crotch graze against your clit. 

The movement was steady making Nico feel a little jealous that it wasn’t him beneath you “fuck you feel so good.” You moaned not sure of how much longer you could last. 

His cock throbbed against your cunts gummy walls, hearing the sound of your skin hitting his causing his forehead to turn slick with sweat. His eyes watched your breasts bounce with every thrust you had on his cock. 

Luke was desperate to feel more of you “kissy?” He whined making you smile. You brought your hand up the side of his neck to his curls “so sweet when you talk so nice.” You praised him as you tugged at his hair. 

The feeling made the boy moan, pursing his lips to kiss you “such a good boy.” You cooed as you finally gave him what he wanted. 

Your lips were soft against his, making him grunt while he sucked at your lower lip “shit schatzi keep on doing you.” Nico felt his eyes screw shut as his cock oozed his sticky release in his hand “you see how much Neeks likes this?” You pulled away from the boy allowing him to see your swollen lips. 

Luke nodded feeling close to tears as his brain was on fire “like it too.” Luke looked down to see how your pussy looked fucking his cock. 

Your release that had mixed with Nico’s creamed around his cock “play with those tits.” Nico ordered making you nod as it was what you were desperate to feel.

His tongue swirled around you nipple while he fondled the other tit “fuck baby you wanna cum inside?” You were on the pill and at that moment not thinking about STDs “god yes.” Luke moaned against your boob causing the vibrations against your skin to go straight to your core. 

Your fingers strummed against your clit like you were playing the guitar, not sure if you were still helping him or if you were now using him for your orgasm “fuck doll right there.” Luke let out a grunt feeling your thrusts grow irregular making your body thrash around on him. 

His warm release painted the walls of your cunt, bringing your own orgasm on. You chanted his name from your lips, making it sound angelic as your cunt clenched around him, gushing on his cock. Your head fell forward when he let your boob go, allowing you to rest your head against his shoulder. A whimper escaped your lips when you accidentally moved, feeling him still inside of you “you okay?” Lukes voice was soft, watching you use what energy you had to pick yourself off of his cock before you collapsed next to him. 

This was always Nico’s favourite part of the night, seeing you almost too fucked to speak, “I’ll get your bath ready.” Nico chuckled as he got up, squeezing your ankle “her bath?” Luke looked between you both as he was back to being confused. 

Nico rolled his eyes, starting to realise why the boy was having girl issues “now it’s time for your next lesson.” Nico motioned to Luke to follow him as Nico picked you up to bring you to go pee “aftercare and the importance of it.” Nico’s voice soothed you, it made your eyelids feel heavy when you rested your head against your boyfriend’s chest while Luke shut the door behind the three of you. 

Clearly, their night wasn’t over, but it wasn’t where the story ended either.

Luke felt his head hit the wall behind him “s-s-shit!” He moaned feeling his eyes screwed shut as he squeezed his hand around his cock continuing to thrust into his palm at a strong pace edging his orgasm. 

Jack walked into the apartment, still surprised that Luke didn’t come with him to the morning skate as he wasn’t the usual Hughes brother to skip it “fuck oh don’t stop y/n!” The moan came from Luke’s lips as he reached his high making Jack freeze where he stood by the door.

Did his younger brother have a crush on his captain’s soon-to-be fiancée?

[woozinhos]

hii I love ur works smmm!!! can I request mingyu dad au and their child asking for another sibling??

Notes: oh my god she’s back with another fic enjoy guys I know it’s not the best but I’m slowly easing back into it <3

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You and Mingyu were sitting together on the couch, enjoying a quiet evening at home when your child walked into the room, looking up at you with an innocent expression on their face.

"Mommy, Daddy?" they asked, his voice soft. Mingyu looked down at them, a smile on his face. "What is it, sweetheart?"

He looked between the two of you before speaking again. "Can I ask you guys a question?" Mingyu chuckled, ruffling the child's hair affectionately. "Of course you can, buddy. What's on your mind?" He hesitated for a moment, looking down at the floor before looking back up at you and Mingyu. "Why don't I have any brothers or sisters?" You and Mingyu exchanged a look, surprised by the question. Mingyu cleared his throat, unsure of how to answer.

"Well, sweetheart," he began, "having a baby is a big responsibility. It takes a lot of time and effort to take care of a baby, and it's not always easy." He nodded, looking up at you with wide eyes. "But I'm a good kid, right? And I would be a good brother, wouldn't I?" Mingyu smiled, touched by his words. "Of course you would, buddy. You're the best kid we could ever ask for. But having a baby is more than just being a good kid. It's about being able to share love and attention with another person." You and Mingyu looked at each other again, a silent conversation passing between you. His request was unexpected, but his words made sense.

"We'll think about it, okay?" you said to him, ruffling their hair like Mingyu had done earlier. "But it's not something we can just decide on a whim. It's a big decision that needs to be thought through carefully." He nodded again, accepting your answer. "Okay," he said, a hint of disappointment in his voice. "Goodnight, Mommy. Goodnight, Daddy."

"Goodnight, sweetheart," you and Mingyu chorused, watching as he left the room. Once he was gone, you turned to Mingyu, a thoughtful expression on your face. "Do you think we should actually consider it?" you asked him. Mingyu sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I don't know," he admitted. "I mean, it's definitely something we need to think about. But we already have so much going on with our work and taking care of our child. Another baby would mean even more responsibility."

You nodded, understanding his concerns. "I know what you mean. But at the same time, I can't help but feel a little guilty.He seems so excited about the idea of having a sibling. Maybe we've been holding off on having more kids for too long." Mingyu looked at you, his expression serious but smirking at the same time. "You're right. We've been so focused on our careers and our own lives that we've kind of neglected the idea of having more kids. Maybe it's time we started thinking about it seriously." You raised an eyebrow at Mingyu's smirk. "What are you thinking?" you asked him, a hint of amusement in your voice.

Mingyu leaned in closer to you, his smirk widening. "I'm thinking that maybe we could have some fun trying to make that decision," he whispered, his breath hot against your ear. You felt a shiver run down your spine as his words sent a jolt of excitement through you. "Oh, really?" you replied, trying to keep your voice steady. "And how do you propose we do that?" Mingyu's smirk turned into a mischievous grin as he leaned in even closer, his lips brushing against your ear. "Well, we could start by practicing some...unprotected fun," he whispered, his hand sliding up your thigh.

You let out a soft gasp as his hand continued to move higher, your body already responding to his touch. "Mingyu, we're supposed to be thinking about having another baby, not making one right now," you protested weakly. Mingyu chuckled as he continued to kiss your neck, his lips moving slowly and sensually along your skin. "I know, I know," he murmured between kisses. "But can you blame me for wanting you so badly right now?" You shook your head, giving in to the pleasure that his kisses were causing. "No, I suppose I can't," you admitted, tilting your head to give him better access to your neck.

Mingyu lifted you up into his arms, carrying you to the bedroom with ease. He kicked the door shut behind him and gently placed you on the bed, his eyes dark with desire. As you lay on the bed, Mingyu climbed on top of you, his body pressing against yours. He began to kiss you hungrily, his tongue exploring your mouth as his hands roamed over your body. You responded to his kisses with equal fervor, your arms wrapping around his neck as you pulled him closer. The heat between you was building quickly, and you could feel yourself getting lost in the moment.

Mingyu's hands were impatient as he tore at your clothes, his own shirt quickly joining the pile on the floor. His body was taut and muscular, and you couldn't help but run your hands over his chest and abs. He paused for a moment, his eyes roaming over your exposed skin. "You're so beautiful," he whispered, his voice husky with desire. "I want you so badly." You could feel the heat rising between your legs as his words sent a thrill through you. "I want you too," you murmured, reaching up to pull him down for another kiss.

As he pulled his boxers down, you couldn't help but stare at his impressive size. You felt a wave of anticipation wash over you, your body already eager for what was to come. Mingyu saw the look in your eyes and grinned, knowing exactly what you were thinking. "Someone's eager," he teased, his hands moving down to your hips. "I love it when you look at me like that." You let out a soft moan as he positioned himself, the anticipation almost too much to bear. You could feel his hardness against your entrance, and you couldn't wait for him to enter you.

"Ready?" he asked, his voice a low growl in your ear. You nodded, unable to form words, and he slowly began to push himself inside of you. As he filled you, you gasped and clutched at his back, your nails digging into his skin. The sensation was intense, but it felt so good. You could feel yourself adjusting to his size, your body welcoming him in.

Once he was fully inside of you, he paused for a moment, letting you get used to the feeling. "You feel so good," he whispered, his breath hot against your ear. "So tight and perfect." You let out a soft moan in response, your hips bucking up against him involuntarily. "Move," you urged him, your voice barely above a whisper. He began to move, slowly at first, but quickly picking up speed. Each thrust sent waves of pleasure coursing through your body, and you found yourself arching your back, pushing against him. As he moved faster, you could feel yourself getting closer and closer to the edge. Your moans grew louder, and you clutched at him desperately, needing to hold onto something as the pleasure threatened to overwhelm you.

"Shhh, be quiet," he whispered, his voice low and urgent. "We don't want to wake up our boy." He continued to move inside of you, his pace steady but intense. He knew how close you were, and he wanted to draw it out for as long as possible. You bit your lip, trying to stifle your moans as he continued to drive you towards the edge. You could feel the heat building inside of you, and you knew that you were about to explode. Suddenly, you felt yourself tipping over the edge, your body shaking with pleasure as you climaxed. You clutched at him tightly, your fingers digging into his skin as wave after wave of ecstasy washed over you.

"I'm gonna cum," he groaned, his voice strained. "I want you to take it, all of it."

He continued to thrust, his movements becoming more erratic as he approached his own climax. "You're gonna look so beautiful pregnant," he panted. "My baby inside of you..." He suddenly let out a loud moan, his body shuddering as he released himself inside of you. You could feel the warmth spreading through you, and you knew that he was true to his word.

As he finished, he collapsed on top of you, panting heavily. He wrapped his arms around you, holding you close as you both tried to catch your breath. "That was amazing," he whispered, his voice filled with satisfaction. You nodded, still unable to speak. Your body was tingling all over, and you felt like you were floating on air. You could feel his seed still inside of you, and the thought sent a shiver down your spine.

"Our son's got great ideas," he said, his lips brushing against your hair. "We should thank him later."

[cloudskyana]

astrology observations

note: take what resonates, these are only based on my own observations.

i have noticed that gemini, aquarius, and sagittarius placements in the big 6 makes a person easygoing. on the other hand, capricorn, scorpio, and aries placements in the big 6 makes a person intense.

when a person's planets are evenly distributed in their birth chart, they are usually adaptable and have friends from different backgrounds. these people are the ones that do not have any stellium, meaning that their energy is not clumped in one area, thus may be more accommodating wit different types of people and more accepting of situations.

people with the sun in the 10th house usually have big ambitions, if not, they are usually popular no matter how introverted they are. there will always be people that knows bits of information about them. the 10th house is your reputation, public image, and career, and the sun is your core and ego. having it in the house of public image may make you feel like people's eyes are constantly on you.

i have a friend with a second house stellium, and my father has some taurus placements. i have noticed that they have high standards and love branded and luxury items, no matter how expensive.

moon in the 12th house makes an individual unaware of their own feelings. if you are familiar with MBTI, these people are INTP and ISTP. it takes some time for them to process what they are really feeling. it is because the 12th house is the subconscious, and the moon is how we process our emotions.

scorpio moons are the most mysterious than any other scorpio placements. they are secretive with their emotions and find it hard to open up. when unhealthy, these people are usually great manipulators of a situation, and it is doubled when they have some virgo placements in their big 6.

do you have the moon in the 7th house? do you crave interaction and validation from people? I have this placement, and no matter how hard i try to deny it, I get more energy and assurance when i interact with people.

when people with mars in gemini gets angry, brace yourselves. since gemini is ruled by the planet mercury, which is all about ideas and communication and mars is a planet of desire, drive, and passion, these people have words that can stab your heart because they can be hurtful when triggered.

mercury square pluto in the natal chart makes an individual prone to overthinking. mercury is all about ideas, pluto is about transformation and intensity. since squares generate tension, the native may have unhealthy thinking patterns. the good side here is this placement is good for detectives since the native is always intense and curious, which means that they do not stop until they uncover the truth or find the answers to their questions.

when talking about love languages, i have noticed that too many fire placements in the big 6 are physical touch, earth placements are gifts and acts of service, air placements are quality time, and water placements are words of affirmation.

saturn in the 4th house people usually have difficulty in expressing affection. also, these people may feel restricted in their homes. they were not given an outlet to express their own baggage as their family may neglected their feelings. on the good side, these people are usually matured, responsible, and know how to navigate a situation.

sun square moon in the natal chart makes a person confused by their own identity. i have this placement, and in my case, it takes a lot for me to know who i am. sun is your core, the one that you show to the public. the moon is your inner world and emotions, which means that the one that you feel or the real you usually conflicts with the one that you show to the public eye.

[winterhawkbigbang]

Winterhawk Big Bang 2025 is here!

To all fans and shippers of WinterHawk! Author Sign Ups are open and Artists can sign up for a reminder now!

But first, for everyone who doesn’t know this event or everyone who needs a refresher since last year:

The Winterhawk Big Bang is a fun, relatively low-effort event, with just 7.5k words minimum for stories and flexible minimums on art and other collaborations. Artists is used as a broad term here and can include things like Moodboards, Playlists, and even Podfic!

Before you sign up, check the rules and this year's schedule first! After that, all you have to do is fill out our Sign-up Form. Be sure to send the form in on time; sign-ups close on 12 March! A confirmation email of your sign-up should be sent to you within 48 hours - if you do not receive one after a few days please reach out to the mods via email (winterhawkbb@gmail.com), Tumblr Message or on our Discord server and we will try to figure out what went wrong.

If you're an artist interested in the event, you can sign up for a non-mandatory reminder before claims open! Be sure you won't miss the sign-up and all the wonderful stories that will be written in just a few months!

If you have any more questions, just want to cheer the authors and artists on, or are still considering joining this year, we welcome you to the Discord server to chat and cheer!

If you want to support us otherwise, you can help us out by reblogging this post far and wide, telling all your fandom friends about it, and share everywhere where more people might see it!

With much excitement, Your Mod Team! Jess, Panic, Panda, Ghost, and Kate!

[airlock]

it's been an intriguing time strolling through the notes here! let's see what's there to say

firstly I'll mention again that the sender of the question doesn't think this is a good idea either (it's... not hard to conclude as much, I'll say), but wanted to start some conversations about how to effectively address bullying.

on that, one thing I'll say is that it does matter to hold bullies accountable for what they do! that's not the same thing as punishing them -- let alone in the absolutely arbitrary manner suggested here -- but it's the first step to any real solution, because without that, you're not even acknowledging that the bullying has happened.

and you know what's really unhelpful towards that end? this limp talk I've seen so many times again in the notes about how bullies are just poor little sad kids with abusive home lives, so we shouldn't do anything too mean to them.

it's true that some bullies have difficult home lives! cold comfort that is for the kids whose school lives are being turned into hell by them. like, I'm all in favour of intervening in cases of abuse at home, and none in favour of punishment for punishment's sake -- but the shitty home life isn't there in the room when the bullying is taking place, is it? each thing has its own time and place to be addressed.

but most of all, it's just not true that trouble in paradise is the big driver behind bullying. in the vast majority of cases, bullying simply happens because it can happen. because children, naturally, don't usually have highly developed moral codes and just follow their whims, and if their whims take them in the direction of "making this kid my punching bag feels good and rewarding", it figures that they'll keep moving in that direction until an equal and opposite force is applied, y'know? and the more factors play against this opposing force -- such as unequal social dynamics (bullying famously follows lines of gender, sexuality, class and race!) -- the more entrenched the bullying becomes. and let me tell ya, the kids who have the easiest time getting away with bullying again and again are not usually the ones with difficult lives, au contraire.

so yes, we don't need random, arbitrary and self-defeating punishments for bullying; the direct question of the poll is pretty easy to solve for. the conversation that the asker was hoping to inspire is a more tangled one. because we do need to do more than wring our hands and feel sorry for bullies. what form that "more" takes is a complicated topic that can't be answered in any broad generalizing manner -- and is best answered by people less socially inept than me -- but knowing to head in that general direction is the first prequisite for any real solutions.

We ask your questions anonymously so you don’t have to! Submissions are open on the 1st and 15th of the month.

[cherryblossompink303]

Patience: ~Covering the famous host club!~

➼ pairing: Kyoya Ootori x Reader ➼ summary: Tamaki finds himself with his heart set on helping save the newspaper club. ➼ what to expect:  "For the first time in your life it was you and him, not just you." ➼ warnings: none ➼ Part Thirteen | Part Fifteen

You had to admit that the times that the host club was held outside that you actually do find a sense of calm during club hours, there was notably less chaos on days like these.

"Wow, I've never notice that the courtyard had such a lovely stream"

"It's called a yarimizu channel, it is said that during the Heian era, people would better experiance the seasons by watching the petals or autumn leaves that drifted along the water. I had it specially made for all of you, hoping it would express my desire to spend all four seasons with you. so then what do you say ladies? This fall, there's an autumn leaves tea party with alimited number of invitations"

"Oh! Sign me up!"

You roll your eyes through a laugh from nearby, it always catches you offguard when Kyoya lays it on thick for the sake of a sail but you had to admit that the times that he does it is certainly entertaining.

The next thing you know Tamaki comes tumbling through the garden, tackling Haruhi to get her out of the way of a ball flying in her direction, resulting in an argument with the twins. "You think so? Well check this out! Starlight kick!"

The ball disappears it gets launched so far "Take care of yourself! Bye!" however when the ball comes back down it barrels through a window"

"Oh god" you sigh, so much for peace.

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Covering the famous host club!

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"Really. We're terribly sorry about that" you had all found yourselves in the office of the newspaper club after it turned out the ball had hit the president in the head. "Don't worry, it's no big deal. Could've happened to anyone, right? Just a ball flying through a window and hitting me upside the head"

"Please accept our apology"

"Well this works out perfectly, I was just thinking about approaching the Host Club about a cover story I don't suppose you'd be interested?"

"I didn't know we had a newspaper club"

"It's more gossip rag than newspaper"

"Like a trashy tabloid, it's filled with stories about scandalous love affairs, family power struggles and junk like that"

"It's just a lame hossip rag that specialises in stirring up scandal. And everyone knows its all lies, so nobody reads it anymore"

It is then that you realise where you recognise the president from "It's Komatsuzawa isn't it?" The question leaves your lips before you really get the chance to stop yourself, drawing attention to where you had been stood in the corner of the room.

"yes, sorry have we met"

"A long time ago in passing, my father is l/n"

It was slowly starting to become a bit awkward when you realise that Komatsuzawa was the son of your fathers old business partner...one that he betrayed to build up a media empire.

He grits his teeth "I see, I didn't realise that you went here, last we met was out of the country"

You shrug "I transferred, surely with all your fathers experience he would have taught you journalistic integrity?"

"You know I guess we have kind of lost sight of the truth because we've been so worried about drawing in more readers. It's a shame we're just now realising our error, now that the paper's at risk. We've finally realised what we should have been reporting to the students of ouran" He stands up.

"Help us please, for the last paper of the semester, we'd like to do an up-close special edition, revealing the charms of ouran's host clubb members. I'm begging you, without your help, our club will close"

"You can count on us" Tamaki assures.

You and Kyoya exchange eyecontact, silently communicating through shaking your heads.

"On behalf of the host club i accept-" "we have to decline" Kyoya shoves Tamaki out the way.

"But Kyoya he got hurt because of me, what's the big deal?"

"Sorry, we have a policy prohibiting us from sharing any personal information with anyone other than our guests. But we'd be more than happy to pay any medical expenses related to your injury"

"And another thing, what makes you think we'd want to help you spread rumors and gossip? We've got a reputation to uphold and you'd just ruin it"

"Besides you guys cause a lot of trouble for other people, and who would want to get mixed up with that"

"I understand, well, I guess you really can't erase the sins of the past, can you?" The president makes direct eye contact with you. "People won't even give you the opportunity to try and redeem yourself Ow! my head is killing me"

"President!"

"I'm ok, don't worry you two, oh no i'm getting dizzy again" you were starting to think that his acting skills are as bad as his journalism. "I guess all we can do at this point is disband with grace"

"No you don't have to" Tamaki doubles down "You can always make a fresh start. we'll help, we will rally the power of the host club, and we can re-establish the Newspaper club together!"

"Well count us out"

"You're way too trusting boss we can't just go along with everything you do forever" "yeah we've had enough"

Kyoya places a hand on your shoulder, guiding you towards the door "We're leaving too Tamaki, we're holding an evaluation meeting, mostly about you"

"Hold it! How can you be so heartless? These men are about to lose their club. Don't you feel sorry for them? Their family's breaking up! As your president I demand you help them and that is a direct order"

"We're not going to do it"

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Tamaki has been sat sulking in the corner for who knows how long, to the point of concern as the rest of you look on "well it's obvious he's upset with us"

"Yeah, he hasn't even changed clothes"

"I hate it when he ignores us when we're right in front of him. He's such a child"

"Nah, Tama-chan's just a lonely guy, you know?"

"I hate to give in, but would it really be that bad to help them out with their newspaper?" Haruhi asks, grabbing everyones attention. "What?"

"Hey, since when are you taking his side?"

"Since never, just listen okay? I know any moment now, he's gonna look over here with those puppy-dog eyes he always uses when he wants something, and none of us will be able to say no, and so he'll win"

"Let me guess, you're speaking from experience, aren't you?"

"Besides maybe I'm wrong but isn't this the kinda thing you guys usually go for?"

"Well no, this seems like more trouble than it's worth" The twins shrug. "What about you Honey-senpai?"

"Count me out, I have this cake to eat and Takashi sticks with me, right?" Honey wolfed down a strawberry cake.

"Y/n?"

"After Renge's film we leave any and all PR to internal affairs, but also I'd like to point out that this club does have secrets that the newspaper club would go for. If they are sniffing around us all it takes one slip up and it's 'favoured host club member secretly a girl?' or 'Host club member secretly engaged' we would be giving them exactly what they want"

You all look over to tamaki, who pulls out said puppy dog eyes mentioned earlier "those are the eyes"

"Puppy dog eyes"

Kyoya sighs "There will be some conditions"

"The outline for their article will be submitted by us. Interviews are strictly prohibited, it is vital that our client's identities be kept confidential, and no one is to reference Haruhi's identity and y/n's ties to the club beyond professional."

"Do we agree?"

"Well, if you it's cool, Kyoya-senpai" "Then we do too"

"I'll do it since Kyo-chan says it's okay"

"Kyoya, a word please?"

The two of you step away from the main group out into the hallway "I don't have a good feeling about this" you are straight up with him once the door closes behind you two. "Relax y/n i've got this handled"

"But-" "Seriously, relax, trust me, it will be handled"

Suddenly the words from that bizarre dream you had recently echoed in your head

"perhaps the reason you think you can't depend on others is that you reject it"

You know that it is strange to take advice of a strange dream version of Tamaki of all people but maybe he is right.

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"Of course! If you'll allow us to cover you, we promise to observe your conditions"

"Well then, you may start tomorrow"

"Excellent"

"So how is that bump on your forehead feeling?"

"Oh, that? It's no big deal, I hardly feel it anymore. I owe a lot to this bump because without it, we'd never have come together for this article"

"That's true, but we're still very sorry it happened" Kyoya slides a first aid kit over the presidents desk "I brought you a little something as an apology of sorts. This is a first aid kit, made by my family's company"

"That you I appreciate it"

"No problem, please excuse me" Kyoya turns to leave "Oh, it just dawned on me, your family runs the Ootori group right? They manufacture medical equipment don't they?"

Kyoya avoids the urge to roll his eyes "We mostly deal with hospital management"

"I am so glad that we'll be working together, my father is a president as well, of the Komatsuzawa publishing firm"

"Yes, I am well aware of that, so being president of the newspaper club is your way of preparing to take over your family's company?"

"Well yes to an extent but I have this younger brother. He's a bright young man, and my father's very proud of him you seeso now my father has decided to turn future management of the company over tgo my younger brother. And thereby passing over me, the eldest son, first born. However, if I'm able to finish my third year at Ouran Academy as the president of a succesdul newspaper club I think he may reconsider my candidacy as his successor. Do you understand? I cannot allow this club to fall apart no matter what"

"Please excuse me" Kyoya leaves, closing the door behind him.

"Mr president are we to assume you were trying to win over Kyoya Ootori?"

"But of course, you see my plans have expanded now, I can knock out two birds with one stone, not only now do I have the opportunity to bring down Tamaki Suoh but if I create enough scandal surrounding y/n then it will reflect badly on the l/n group and will certainly gain favour from my father"

"But how would befriending Kyoya Ootori help with that?"

"Well isn't obvious? the two of them are always together not to mention their fathers are very good friends, I can use him to get to her" he stands up, looking out the window. "As for Tamaki Suoh he clearly flaunts his power and standing to sucker all those poor girls into that host club. I will dig until I find scandal in all of them"

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It was actually entertaining watching the host club play red light green light out in the gardens, purely for how much Tamaki gets into it as opposed to the rest of the club, you aren't partaking in it, trying to put some distance between you and them, also to keep an wyw on the newspaper club stood nearby.

"President, what on earth are we witnessing?"

"Could it be some kind of new religion?"

"Why are you asking me? How should I know?"

"You know, I can't blame you for being shocked, I was nunfamiliar with it myself, but it's a commoner's game. They have a wide variety , and none of them require spending any money. All you need is a few friends to play with" Tamaki prances over to explain,

"Mhm, and what does this have to do with our coverage of the host club?"

"You need to learn friendliness!" tamaki is very dramatic with his demanding "If you want to clear the negative reputation of the newspaper club, and attempt to capture the hearts of your readers, you must try to be more down to earth. I can just imagine the headlines now 'The handsome boys of the host club enjoy commoner's games' wioth pictures of us frolicking in the scenery of early summer. It would be the perfect face life of your front pag. And it gives you the chance to show that a certain commoner is happier now reliving his childhood here with us!"

Tamaki pulls the host club into another game, running back to the rest of the club, the Newspaper club approaching Haruhi for an interview, you watching on noting that they had agreed to no interviews and they are already breaking that however they did not seem to be inferring anything about Haurhi's identity. Still you shut it down quickly when it starts to go longer than needed.

During a game of kick the can, or kankeri the newspaper club wander off while the others hide and Kyoya starts counting until he hits 6, dropping the facade of playing the game and standing up once he realises they are gone, you raise an eyebrow "I didn't think you would cheat at anything as small as a playground game kyoya" you say, assuming hes going to jump to searching for them early.

"I'm not cheating, there's something I need to do" he says, wandering off to follow the newspaper club "Wait!" you call after him, running behind."

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"That's it i'm writing the article" Komatsuzawa seeths, marching down the hallway "But president, you have no evidence, gossiping about suoh or l/n is dangerous"

"I don't need evidence, I'll make evidence if I have to, I can think of all kinds of scandals surrounding them. Everyone will see it, once I'm finished with them they'll both have to flee back to europe"

They slam open the doors to the newspaper club to find the twins waiting for them. "So we were right all along"

"You two"

"well, I guess it was pretty obvious"

"The boss and Y/n are the only ones who haven't caught on yet, well, she'll know soon enough, both of them are quite oblivious when it pertains to anything about themselves"

"I should warn you, if you threaten either of them, there will be concequences" "Are you ready to have the Hitachiins and every other club members' family as your enemy?"

"I knew it, you're nothing but Suoh's lackeys! Tamaki's holding his parents' power over you"

"That's not true, we don't hang out with tama-chan because of his parents. We love him. We all like being around him, and that's why we choose to be here."

"He may be a hopeless idiot but even so" Kyoya appears against the wall the door is on, hand on your shoulder.

"Well what will you do?"

"Please leave Tama-chan alone, okay?"

"I'll get you all! It's not just about him anymore! I'll write an article that will ruin all of you"

The president squints at you and Kyoya, assessing his body language and the interactions he had in the past couple of days. "Oh I see now, it's so obvious I can't believe I didn't see it sooner. Your family's have paired you two haven't they?"

You and Kyoya fall silent, you had to admit that you had underestimated him enough to assume he wouldn't put it together. "That's why you came to Japan of all places, why you're always together, they want to combine the forces of the Ootori and l/n groups"

You note how Kyoya's grip tightens at the words. "How perfect, I can both expose your engagement to drive away host club guests and write an article that will tear the deal apart"

"Go ahead, be my guest" your jaw drops at Kyoya's words as he wanders over to the first aidkit he had gifted them. "Although..." he presses a panel at the bottom of the box, ejecting a disk.

"What should we do about this little disk? You see it's been here since yesterday, and it recorded everything. It would only take y/n one phone call and it would be all over the country. How do you think your father would react to that?"

"President just give up already" He falls to his knees.

"Let me explain it to you in terms you can understand. You would do well to remember that the ootori group and the hitachiin family alone have enough stock to remove your father from his position as president of the Komatsuzawa publishing firm. However, we would never do something like that. We are not like you. What we strive for is fundamentally different."

The president is still on his knees as you go to leave the room "You're just as twisted as your father" you pause at the words. Leaving only him, you and kyoya in the room. You shake your head.

"No i am nothing like my father, I don't betray the people I trust, I am sorry for what he did to your father. But you don't think I'm twisted because I am similar to him, you just don't want to admit that you have started to become like him"

You leave, kyoya following behind.

♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡

Eventually you found where Tamaki and Haruhi disappeared to within the hedge maze, now on the way out for cake. "Why didn't you tell me about planting the bug in the Newspaper club?" You ask Kyoya, the rest of the club ahead. "i didn't know how you'd react, I knew it would be the best way to ensure that no harmful articles came out, I had a feeling komatsuzawa would pull something like this once you mention how you two know each other"

you pause, realising exactly how many times Kyoya has gone out of his way to protect you despite him not needing to.

'You love him, don't you? is that romantic love or something else?'

Mori's voice rang around your head, almost taunting you.

pressure seized itself in your chest as you realise a few things.

You had let Kyoya in. For the first time in your life it was you and him, not just you.

"Come on y/n! We don't want to lose you" Tamaki called from further ahead.

Next time on patience 'A refreshing battle in Karuizawa!'

Tag list (reply to be added): @skottch @cgmajor @rebirthbunbun @bbybubbles @blueberry19000 @katgirl05 @smellslikelovinglies @veras-fanfic-reblogs @sadprimrose @mirtalikesdr @sleeplesssskeleton @ritzes28 @crackpeole @rory-cakes @renjunniex @II-kita-san-II @angelicwillows @missbrebre1012 @sleep-7372 @strawberrbitch @reticent-writer @eternal-dokja @meme848 @mistyhydrangeagarden

[bunnysdollette]

₊⊹⁀➴ How to get your shit together in a slump: BD’s instant guide to feeling 100% again! ⟡﹒⪩⪨ 🫧🌸🧁

⋆˚｡⋆୨୧ Hi angels :) Thank you so much for the positive reception on my last posts. Anyway, I’ve been super down lately so I’d thought I’d create this post as a bit of a reference point for anyone who feels like their life is going off of the rails these days. This is how I get myself out of a slump. 💬

♫ todays song is…some by SOYOU

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ GET OFF THAT DAMN PHONE.. 📝 ⊹₊⟡⋆

wait! I was just joking. don’t close your phone until you finish reading (haha). anyway, take a look at your screentime for me. you might have been scrolling for hours or trying to distract yourself from how horrible you felt by doomscrolling endlessly…no. we can’t do that.

usually when I’m in a slump I feel damp, it’s not just about laziness. this could also be the result of exhaustion or a number of factors. dampness is an evil condition in chinese medicine where you feel heavy, tired, and dead. scrolling will only make this worse because you’re prolonging the pain. the first thing you should do is get up, stretch, breathe, and maybe crack a window. the airflow will make a big difference, I promise. 🌿

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ CLEAN UP GUIDE. 🌸 ⊹₊⟡⋆

when my room is a mess my state of mind is a mess. I can’t do anything, I’m literally loosing my marbles bc all I can see is a messy space. if your brain is in shambles rn, the smallest amount of organization you can do right now is tidy up your room a little bit.

this doesn’t even have to be a big clean, but small steps make a big impact!… remember your space is sacred. 🧘🏾‍♀️

make the bed. doesn’t have to be fancy, just make sure everything is where it needs to be.

wipe down surfaces like desks, mirrors, and vanities. you can even include a scented spray whilst doing this to make your space smell much cleaner and nicer!! I literally cannot function when my room smells like asscheeks.

remove any old cups, or food waste that you were procrastinating from doing so. don’t want to attract any bugs.

Sweep the floor. You probably don’t notice how many crumbs are on the ground, but please just do it.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ RECHARGE YOUR “STATS”. 🛁 ⊹₊⟡⋆

honestly the best way to get out of a slump is self care. neglecting your needs and body can often lead to things going downhill, depressive episodes, etc. We all forget to take care of ourselves properly sometimes, but it’s important to pay attention to our needs and personal wellness.

Ask yourself.

“Did I shower today?” ➜ Take yourself a nice, warm shower and stay in as long as you want.

Take some time to reflect on your day or anything that’s been on your mind. And be sure to wash up well, so you can feel really nice after and tap into your feminine energy. You can even add bath salts, milk, or bubble bath. It will literally make you feel like a princess. . . 👑

“Did I eat/drink today?” ➜ Go eat something.

I prefer light meals or snacks that are cold like fruit, water, or a juice when I’m feeling dead but you can also eat whatever you want. Just think about what will make you feel good and reduce the dampness as much as possible, and will prevent brain fog. Heavier meals aren’t the best for that though.

I bet you feel better already after doing these things! Remember that taking care of yourself is the most important and you are a priority.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ REFLECTING AND MAKING A GAME PLAN 🧁 ⊹₊⟡⋆

Lastly after you feel a little bit better now and you took care of yourself, I would really suggest reflecting either through journaling or shadow work questions. They’re the easiest way to just brain dump all of the crap you’ve been thinking about lately and get it out of your system in a healthy and helpful way.

You can write about things like “how have I been feeling lately?” “What’s one way I can improve in xyz” and so on. This is a mundane activity you can do at the end to organize your thoughts. Mental health is a huge thing after your physical health, as it literally not only affects your world but the world around us. Especially if you are trying to achieve your dream life/dream self, manifest anything, etc. you will need to take care of your mental health to not be consumed by your emotions and keep your mind in check.

Also something that is crucial is practicing gratitude and mentally grounding yourself. You can list things your grateful for, mediate, or exercise. Anything to get yourself into that mindset you need going forward. I personally love to listen to the wizard liz’s podcast in times like these, it’s a great motivation for me.

Remember that slumps, dampness, depressive episodes, all of it, is normal. We are just humans at the end of the day. Be a little nicer to yourself today and take some small active steps towards your goals. ✨🫶🏽

✧ thanks for reading beautiful !! ; so basically I’m thinking of maybe making a community here on tumblr for the girl bloggers that share dream girl content and stuff like that? idk let me know what u think. inbox is always open, stay hydrated and cute, buh bye 👋🏾

[harmless-variety-of-garden-snake]

This fulfills both my BuckTommy agenda and my Chimney and Tommy are besties agenda. It's Fluffebruary Day Eleven: Double Date! Tagging @bucktommyfluffebruary, and you can read this on AO3 over here.

It’s Howie who suggests he and Tommy take their Buckleys out together, and Tommy is happy to go along with it. He and Howie have been occasionally meeting up for a beer or coffee ever since the cruise ship rescue, and they’re currently sitting next to a playground while Jee-Yun goes down the same slide over and over. She lands about four feet from them and waves every time until she runs back to carefully climb the steps back up.

“What are you thinking?” Tommy asks, swirling the last of his coffee in its paper cup to mix it before taking a swig.

“LA County Fair is coming up. You ever go?”

Tommy snorts softly and nods. “Yeah, with Ben.”

“Yeah, fuck that, we’re making new memories,” Howie says, making a face. He’d heard about Tommy’s last serious relationship in all its toxic glory after he’d cornered Tommy in a CVS to ask why the hell he’d been ducking Howie since his and Evan’s (thankfully temporary, then current) break-up. “Just do not tell my daughter, because we’re taking her in a couple weeks and she’s gotta think it’s the first time or she’ll look at me with big, sad eyes.”

“I’ll take it to my grave,” Tommy vows solemnly, and Howie claps him on the shoulder.

They settle back and watch Jee-Yun, happily taking compliments from a couple of other parents and nannies on how sweet their daughter is.

“Yep, we love her, she’s our little angel,” Howie says, putting an arm around Tommy’s shoulders and squeezing.

“Absolutely,” Tommy agrees readily, squeezing Howie’s knee. “Been that way since the day we brought her home.”

“Uncle Tommy!” she shouts, running full-tilt toward them and catching herself on his knees. “Swing?”

“Swing,” he confirms, scooping her up and messily kissing her cheek as she squeals with laughter. “Let’s see if we can get you to go all the way around in a big circle.”

Howie jumps to his feet. “Let’s not do that.”

Tommy turns his own big, sad eyes on Howie as he backs toward the playground. “But Da-ad.”

“Tommaso Gianni, you better not break my daughter.”

Jee-Yun gasps and looks at Tommy. “Uh-oh.”

“First and middle name? I know,” he says gravely. “Okay, we’ll carefully swing.”

She pouts and throws her arms around Tommy’s neck. “Oka-ay.”

He happily pushes her on the swing until Maddie shows up with Evan, both of them having had lunch with their parents. Tommy bites back a grin when he sees the confusion on the faces of the people who’d approached him and Howie as Maddie greets her husband with a kiss.

Evan walks over and waves. “Hey, guys!”

“Uncle Buck!” Jee-Yun shrieks, and Tommy barely has time to catch the chains of the swing to stop it before she launches herself off of it to run to Evan’s waiting arms. He picks her up and kisses her cheeks before settling her on his hip.

He’s listening to her recap about the caterpillar she found when they’d arrived and asking her questions about what it looked like and is in the middle of telling her what kind of moth it’ll probably turn into as he reaches Tommy.

“Hey,” he says, kissing him on the corner of his mouth. “We swinging?”

“Yep, but we’ve been restricted to safe swinging,” Tommy says, and Evan makes a face. “Right? Howie doesn’t know that this girl’s ready to fly.”

“Alright,” Evan says to a captivated Jee-Yun, sitting on the swing. “Here’s how we’re going to do this. You’re gonna hold on real right, okay? And then Uncle Tommy is gonna push as hard as he can.”

She nods and wraps her arms around Evan, and he holds the chain of the swing with one hand and wraps his other arm around her. When he’s settled in, he backs up until he’s almost standing up straight.

“Alright, launching in five, four, three, two, one!”

With that, he pushes off, and Tommy grins when she shrieks with laughter. He pushes them carefully, not wanting to risk Evan losing his grip, but Evan’s pumping his legs to build up a little more height.

“So are you guys poly or—”

The question catches him off-guard, and he looks sheepishly at the nanny who’d been talking to him and Howie earlier.

“No, that’s my boyfriend’s brother-in-law,” he explains. “We were, uh, just messing with people.”

She snorts and shifts the toddler she’s carrying to her other hip. “You guys are going to be the talk of the playground for a couple days. Please don’t clear things up with anyone else, I live for this kind of thing.”

“Uncle Tommy is slacking!” Evan calls over his shoulder.

“Uncle Evan can chill,” Tommy says, stepping back into position.

When they’re ready to hop off, Evan dramatically “jumps” as the swing is coming to a stop, and Maddie comes over to offer her daughter a bag of pretzel chips and some water.

“What’s this I hear about a double date?” she asks, plucking two pretzel chips out of the bag and handing one to each of them.

“Yep,” Tommy says, popping the snack into his mouth. “Tomorrow, actually. Details to follow.”

He gives a meaningful glance down to Jee-Yun, who’s looking up at them as she sips her water. Later, when they’re in Evan’s Jeep and away from little ears, Tommy asks him how he feels about the fair.

“Oh, man, I am so winning you a bear,” Evan says, grinning.

“Uh, I think I’m going to be winning a bear for you.”

“Nuh-uh.”

“I’m one half of the organizing party, it’s my responsibility—”

“To buy me a funnel cake and hold my hand on—actually, no, no ferris wheel.”

Tommy shudders. “Yeah, nothing that, uh, leaves the ground.”

They bicker about who’s responsible for winning stuffed animals for who all the way back to the loft.

–

His last trip to the fair really had been a disaster. Ben had complained about the price of food, Tommy had ignored every attempt at initiating conversation about them attending Ben’s high school reunion, and they’d ended the night in silence and with headaches.

This time, Maddie is six months pregnant and devouring every bit of fair food she can get her hands on, Howie has had three different face painting artists have a go at him and now looks like Spider-Man/Darth Maul/a butterfly depending on which third of his face you’re looking at, and Evan is carrying a stuffed puppy under one arm and has a weird monkey puppet looped around his neck. Tommy has a pink bear the size of Jee-Yun under his arm, and he feels like he’s going to be sick if he eats anything else that’s been fried.

“Alright, funhouse, funhouse, funhouse,” Evan chants.

“Absolutely not,” Maddie says around a fried Oreo. “But you guys enjoy yourselves.”

They hand off their stuffed prizes to Maddie and Howie and run into the funhouse. It’s very old and mostly full of spinning platforms and moving walkways and some mirrors, and Evan has them stop and take a picture in every single one. After, they spot the haunted house and manage to entice Howie and Maddie into joining them on that one because it involves sitting down.

It’s so much goddamn fun. Howie and Tommy hang back while Maddie and Evan try to do a game that involves rubber ducks, both of them sipping on overpriced beer.

“You know, Maddie told me they never went to a fair when they were kids,” Howie says. “Danny was too sick, then everything after. Isn’t that wild?”

Tommy knows he means that it’s something else and nods. “Means we should probably take them every year to make up for it.”

“That’s exactly what I was thinking.”

They clink their plastic cups together and exchange grins.

“State fair up in Sac when the kids are old enough,” Howie decides. “Or if we can get a babysitter for the weekend.”

“I know a cheap pilot.”

“Oh, don’t call yourself that, honey,” Howie coos, pinching his cheek.

“Stop flirting with my boyfriend,” Evan says, pressing a small, squishy dinosaur against Tommy’s chest. “Your move, Kinard.”

Maddie hands a Minion dressed like a pirate to Howie. “Meet your son.”

“Howard, Jr,” he sighs, petting its goggled eye happily. “Who wants to go scare the shit out of the person running that thing where you swing a hammer to hit a bell? I’m pretty sure they’ll cry when they see these two muscle-bound freaks.”

By the end of the night, they’re tired and all leaning against each other and carrying more stuffed animals than any four adults should ever own. The big, floppy elephant that Evan is hauling is Tommy’s personal favorite. He also has a tote bag over each shoulder with crafts, trinkets, snacks, and random spice and tea blends from vendors.

“We should do a Ren Faire,” Evan suggests.

“Oh, my god, Jee as a little squire or a princess,” Maddie whines, burying her face in her stuffed shark. “Honey, please.”

“Yeah, alright,” Howie says, leaning in to kiss her hair. She’s already got grease paint smudged on it and her face from him, so she’d stopped batting him away hours ago.

They get to Howie and Maddie’s car, since paying for parking twice had sounded like a terrible idea, and they get a ride back to Tommy’s house.

“We’re the fucking kings of double dates,” Howie says, reaching back to bump Tommy’s fist before they get out of the car. “But maybe just dinner and a movie next time.”

“Go big or go home, Han.” He swoops in for a kiss to Maddie’s cheek and climbs out of the back seat, joining Evan in gathering their prizes from the back of the car. “Alright, let’s get them settled into the guest room.”

They arrange their prizes on the bed and Tommy takes a picture of the frankly ridiculous army they amassed, though there’s one more soldier on his side than Evan’s thanks to that game where you shoot water into a hole to win a horse race. They’d been so close to winning a bear as big as Maddie, but he’s a little glad they didn’t. He doesn’t even know where he’s going to keep all of these and imagines the toy drive will be getting a sizable stuffed toy donation once he lets their friends’ kids pick out a favorite to adopt.

The elephant and bear are staying with them, though.

[uncleasriel]

I think this illustrates something about the reactionary mind.

The underlying macho bullshit of that old stupid canard about "Hard Men make Good Time, Good Times make Soft Men, Soft Men make Bad Times, Bad Times make Hard Men" is at play here: the assumption is that being able care about your gender or race or disability or class or any other intersectional trait is just something only Decadent Soft People think about because they're too idle and not doing the work of Real People (tm) like backbreaking manual labour or soldiering or other from of Being Professionally Manly And Tough.

In addition to this premise being utterly ahistorical dogshit (too often used by militarist, authoritarian and fascistic pigfuckers to rationalize why they need to take control to make us big and tough again), it's also pathetically oversimplified and fucking factually incorrect. Crossdressing and drag performances were popular among World War 2 troops, and you'd be a fool to consider that this didn't have an impact on folks coming out. Even those that remained closeted were still able to serve defending their country (and all which that entails), and were defended by their comrades when petty bureaucrats tried to use edge-case bullshit to try and deny them what they were owed as veterans.

I pick out the gender stuff because it's the one that most readily pisses off the C.H.U.D.s (don't get girly gay things all over my fantasies!) but things like disability or race or class also factor in just as much. The 1944 Disability Employment Act in Britain was born out of similar conditions, as those getting bodily mutilated in the war were no longer able to serve in the front lines but still could pursue work that could aid in the war effort.

I frame so much of this through 20th century military history because that is what has defined the shape of so much of our adventure fiction, even 80 years after the fact. World War 2 adventure fiction, pulp adventure novels, historical fiction (I'm looking at Robert E. Howard in particular here)... all of it trickles down into the Fantasy Genre as we know it today, especially in the foundational bones of Magic: the Gathering. A lot of the imitators of those works have emerged over the years, and many of them carry on the same thematic assumptions of the genre that thanosisking unwittingly raises in their initial question: why would women/blacks/gays/cripples/etc even fit into those worlds, they're not there in the source material!?

I believe this is just a by-product of folks like OP who don't look at the source fiction and history underlying it in any more than a cursory way. For folks with limited understandings the topic, including themes the ones discussed seem forced. I would encourage these folks to read some Imaro stories or a Jirel of Jhoiry tale - there's a lot more to the genre that actively explores all manner of odd or atypical stories than just the derivatives that have trickled through the corporate publishing houses of the 1990s and onward. I strongly suggest they subscribe to Strange Studies of Strange Stories, and its predecessor H.P. Podcraft - the Weird Tale has a dozen of literary descendants, and they have a much richer history than folks know.

It's fair to quibble about how well some writers handle these themes - folks inexperienced with understanding intersectional matters can be clumsy, and the fact that writing for a corporate entity owned by Hasbro (which has to toe a very particular line called "don't do things that will make shareholders uncomfortable.") But simply barking "there's Forced Woke Diversity In My Wizard Card Game" is the bleating of a black sheep who is best ignored.

With all of the threats to the worlds like Tarkir or Mirrodin or the War of the Spark, wouldn't it be prudent to NOT include anything about race/gender/identity? Nobody was worried about their own gender during WWII because they were worried about survival. I feel it cheapens the threats that characters like Bolas or the Eldrazi present when you stick identity politics like Daretti or Ashiok because those characters seem more occupied with identity than with saving the day.

If you think no one was worried about their gender in World War II, that simply means you’re unaware of history. People will literally put in concentration camps and killed because of it.

[jessicaloons]

Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince:

Chapter 11

Masterlist - Previous - Next

Miss Americana

"Maman!" Charles said in a hushed voice but his mother only grinned, her eyes darting between her son and her young assistant.

"What? You did talk about her…" Pascale just shrugged her shoulders "Where is my gorgeous, little Ava?"

Lauren just then noticed the stroller behind Charles.

"You were right, by the way…" he said, looking at her.

"Umm-…?" Lauren was confused.

"I gave her a warm bath later on when she was still a little restless." Charles replied and she remembered their conversation again "She had a little cold back then… but she’s umm-… she’s better now."

"That’s good to know, I’m glad." the girl smiled at him, watching Pascale gently picking up Ava from the stroller, giving her the chance to see the little girl from close up "She’s gorgeous."

"That she is…" Pascale cooed.

"Yeah, she really is…" Charles agreed, although his eyes weren’t on his daughter but on Lauren, who didn’t seem to notice.

"Are you done with everything? Ready to close the salon for the next 3 weeks?" Charles asked his mother and Lauren looked at Pascale with big eyes.

"Oh god. I totally forgot to tell you… I’m so sorry!" the hairdresser gasped.

"Oh… umm okay… well yeah, I mean, I was wondering why I couldn’t set up new appointments for the next weeks although the calendar seemed to be empty, but I thought you blocked them because of our little project." the young girl smiled at her boss who sighed.

"No, it’s not okay… you could’ve planned something beforehand for the next weeks and now I leave you behind and all alone just like that…" Pascale said sincerely.

"It’s really okay Pascale. I probably wouldn’t even have planned something. Just stayed here… also, I scheduled the delivery of the new sinks and some other supplies for tomorrow, so yeah, maybe it’s better when we’re closed!" Lauren tried to reassure her "You go and enjoy your holidays with your family. I take care of the delivery tomorrow and then I watch over the salon… maybe I start with the remodelling…"

"No! We’re closed due to holidays! I cannot let you work while I do nothing… and I can’t let you be here all alone when they deliver all this new stuff tomorrow!" Pascale shook her head.

"You can and you will. Please let me handle this, Pascale. After everything you did for me…" Lauren meant what she said, looking at the other woman hugging her granddaughter close to her chest.

Pascale sighed, looking at her young assistant, the girl that got so close to her heart over the last weeks. She didn’t want to leave her all alone. Especially not in her makeshift bedroom in the storage room. The thought of Lauren all alone in the dark room with only one tiny window made her heart clench and she shook her head.

"Charles, how about you come in tomorrow morning and help Lauren with the delivery? We’re not leaving before noon so there’s enough time for that…" she smiled mischievously at her son "I would feel bad if I’d let poor Lauren handle it alone…"

"That’s really not necessary!" the girl in question protested but was shut down by just one look of the older woman.

"You know how these delivery people are! They will drop the stuff right at the entrance and you have to carry around those heavy packages all by yourself! So no, Charles will help you, right?"

"Of course! Yeah… Maman is right, you shouldn’t carry all of that alone. That’s- umm no, I’m coming. Just tell me when I should be here…" Charles said hastily, looking at Lauren.

"Umm-… the mail said they’ll be here at around 8 am so… yeah at 8?" she replied shyly and Charles nodded.

"I’ll be here then."

"Perfect!" Pascale clapped her hands gently, making Ava giggle.

Lauren was tossing and turning, not able to fall asleep. No matter what she did, when she closed her eyes she saw Charles blueish-green eyes and his dimply smile in front of her. His loving eyes whenever he looked at his daughter. Ava. The most gorgeous baby girl she has ever seen. She had her father’s eyes and dimples. A cute little button nose, chubby cheeks and a bright smile that was giving her father’s a run for its money. Lauren was nervous meeting Charles all alone. No Pascale to bridge the awkward silence. Only the two of them. Alone. She didn’t even know why she was nervous. Just that she was. Which was weird. She never felt that way before and she didn’t know if she liked it or not.

"Get yourself together, Rachel." she mumbled into the dark room, sighing after a moment "Lauren. I’m Lauren."

She checked the time and groaned. 1 am already. She turned on her side. Closing her eyes taking a deep breath, Charles face in front of her immediately. But this time she ignored it. Yes, he was attractive. Yes, there were some weird feelings stirring inside of her. But it didn’t matter. He was Pascale’s son. He had a daughter which probably meant he had a beautiful girlfriend or wife as well. Out of her league. Not that she even thought about anything like that. She already had a long enough list of problems. A crush on an unavailable man who’s also the son of her boss wasn’t going to make it on that list. And still it was Charles face she saw when she fell asleep. Unfortunately it wasn’t his face that made her wake up. Sweaty and heavy breathing. Heart racing. She had a nightmare that her father and even worse Tony had found her. Taking her back home against her will. Threatening her life and everyone who was kind to her if she wouldn’t come back. Lauren felt sick. It wasn’t the first time she had a nightmare like this. The first one or two weeks after she ran away were filled with nightmares. But since she arrived in Europe, brought a whole ocean between her and her old life, the nightmares were gone. Or at least she thought so. Lauren sat up and grabbed her water bottle, gulping it almost down in one go. With one hand she was brushing her hair out of her sweaty face, with the other she was searching for her phone to check the time.

"Fuck!" Lauren let out, scrambling out of the bed. 7:58 am. "Why? Why last night? Out of all nights I had to have a nightmare last night!" she mumbled.

Lauren left the storage room, her heart sinking when she saw Charles waiting through the storefront, talking with what looked like the delivery guy.

"I’m so, so sorry! I didn’t hear my alarm!" Lauren unlocked the door, pulling both sides wide open "I hope you didn’t have to wait too long…"

"Oh no, it’s alright..." Charles began with a big smile "We didn’t even wait for…" his smile faded immediately and worry was etched on his features "Are you okay?"

"Huh?" Lauren turned, looking at him.

"You’re awfully pale…" he replied and she just waved him off.

"Oh-… umm… of course. It was just a little stressful when I realised that I’m too late!" she tried to reassure him and then quickly turned to the delivery guy "But now I’m here and we can start…"

"Sure." he nodded and started to unload 3 big and heavy looking packages, dropping them off at the entrance, followed by a handful of smaller packages "That’s all, I need you to sign here… and here…"

"I didn’t even know that Maman planned on remodelling the salon…" Charles said after he sat down the last of the 3 big packages.

"We talked about it and well one thing lead to another…" Lauren shrugged, opening one of the smaller packages "We made a mood board, looked up some stuff online and then we already ordered it…"

"Wow, my mother usually isn’t the spontaneous type. She takes her time making decisions, thinking everything through. You must have made quite the impression on her."

"I told her that the salon looks amazing, there is nothing that needed to be changed!" Lauren quickly replied "I didn’t tell her that she should do it…"

"No! That’s not-… I didn’t mean it like that. Umm- like you talked her into it! I know her, talking her into something doesn’t work. I just meant that the ideas you had must’ve been amazing, otherwise she wouldn’t be on board that quickly!" Charles looked at her with wide eyes.

"Oh. Well, she knows what she wants. And I was just lucky enough ti find the perfect stuff online…"

"Can I see it?" he asked "The mood-board?"

"Oh? Sure…" she searched through her phone, handing it over to Charles "That was the vision…"

He didn’t reply immediately, looking at the design, the different textures and colours.

"Wow…" Charles let out, looking at her "I understand why my mother agreed. It looks amazing, Lauren."

The way he said her name made the girl shiver, taking her phone back.

"It’s nothing…"

"It is. Really. You have an eye for details."

"My mother and I, we used to watch HGTV all day long. The home renovation shows were our favourite. It was either nurse or interior designer for me…"

"Why did you choose being a nurse then?" Charles asked curiously.

Lauren was silent for a moment. Thinking about the best way to answer his question.

"I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry…" he added but she shook her head.

"I wanted to help people. People that got hurt or are sick. So yeah… nurse it was." Lauren replied, swallowing hard.

The truth was, she wanted to become a nurse because she saw what her father and his line of work did to people. A part of her was hoping she could get rid of the guilt she felt over the pain they’ve caused. Another part always had to think back at her mother and the night of their accident. How helpless she felt.

"Lauren?" Charles soft voice made her flinch "Are you okay?"

"Hmm?" she looked at him confused.

"You were a little- umm… absentminded…" he took a step closer, looking in her eyes, noticing the tears gathering.

"Yeah…" she replied, her voice hoarse.

"You sure?" Charles asked when a single tear rolled down the girls cheek and without thinking about it he gently wiped it away with his thumb, cupping her cheek.

"I was just thinking of something…" Lauren breathed out when the door to the salon opened and Pascale walked in, followed by a boy carrying Ava, making Lauren taking a step away from Charles, looking at her boss.

"Are we interrupting something?" the boy, who looked a lot like Charles just younger, asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Ferme-la, Arthur!" Charles hissed, making Arthur held up his hand.

"Lauren, this is Arthur, my youngest son… and you know little Ava by now…" Pascale introduced Lauren to Arthur.

"The famous Lauren. I’ve heard so much about you already!" he grinned at her.

"Hopefully good things?" Lauren said nervously.

"Only good things, no not even good, my mother was praising you. Basically everything about you… but saying you’re a really pretty girl was a total understatement…" he winked and Lauren felt herself blush.

"Stop it, Romeo!" Pascale rolled her eyes but had to smirk at the look Charles was giving his younger brother "I brought some breakfast for my little hard workers."

"I’m starving!" Arthur exclaimed.

"I wasn’t talking about you. What did you do besides carrying your niece around? Right. Nothing." Pascale put down a paper bag and two cups on the counter "This is for you two." she smiled at Charles and Lauren.

"That wasn’t necessary!" the girl mumbled.

"Don’t think I didn’t notice how little you eat! You really should’ve accepted my offer and move in with me instead of living in the storage room with no way to cook an-…"

"What? You sleep in the storage room?" Charles made big eyes, looking at Lauren "But-… that room is tiny! And dusty! Is there even a window?"

"It’s fine! There is a window. It’s not dusty. The bed is comfy. It’s just until I got my feet on the ground…" she replied hastily.

"Yeah and you could’ve done that at my place just as good…" Pascale sighed.

"Maman is right! This is just a salon! It’s not safe! Do you know how often there has been break-ins here in the shops?" Charles said, his voice laced with worry "It’s dangerous!"

"This is Monaco… not Nice!" Arthur laughed but stopped as soon as his brother looked at him "But still. Yeah. Dangerous. Living in a shop."

"It’s fine. Really. As soon as my French is better and I can do my qualification and start working as a nurse I’ll look for a flat! Until then, the store is just fine!"

"I don’t kn-…" Charles got interrupted by his phone and he pulled it out of his pocket "Hang on a minute, I gotta take that call…" he groaned groaned, stepping out of the shop.

"Arthur? I need your height!" Pascale voice came out of the storage room and he got up looking around.

"Could you hold her?" he looked at Lauren.

"Of course!" she smiled and took Ava out of Arthur’s hands "Hello, pretty girl." she cooed at her, making the little girl smile "Aren’t you adorable!"

Ava looked at Lauren with her big, bright eyes, cuddling into her chest, making adorable sounds that made Lauren’s heart swell. The little girl was grabbing the strings of her hoodie playing with it, happily chortling.

Outside of the salon Charles ended the call, sighing frustrated when he looked through the storefront, seeing his daughter smiling brightly at Lauren. His heart skipped a beat and his insides began to warm up. Holding Ava looked so natural to Lauren. Like she never did anything else in her life and Charles smiled. He quietly opened the door and walked inside, leaning against the wall, watching his daughter and Lauren. She cooed at Ava, gently caressing her cheek making the little girl snuggle up into her arm, happily giggling. Like in trance Charles watched the scene in front of him, not able to interrupt it.

"Oh wow, look at that, she loves you! Normally she’s super fuzzy with strangers! But with you? Charles, I think you have some competition…" Arthur laughed, walking back in and Lauren looked up, spotting Charles leaning against the wall.

"Yeah… I think so too, she seems to like you a lot…" he replied, looking at her with an intense gaze, making her blush slightly.

"She’s a perfect little girl. It’s easy with her…" Lauren smiled at Ava who yawned a little.

"A tired little girl. Come on sweet girl…" Arthur began, holding out his hands, but Ava turned her head away, snuggling even more into Laurens chest "Hey! You stole my niece from me!"

"I’m sorry." the girl chuckled and looked down at Ava.

"Don’t be… he’s just jealous. Ava has good taste in who she likes, that’s all…" Charles pushed off the wall, walking over to the two girls and his daughter lifted her head, hearing her fathers voice this close.

"But no one beats her dad…" Lauren smiled right as Ava held her hand out for Charles and she carefully handed the little girl over "Understandable…" she whispered underneath her breath.

After a few moments of silence, Pascale came back from the storage room, seeing Charles with Ava in his arms standing close to Lauren while Arthur sat on the counter, scrolling through his phone.

"Alright, I guess we’re done here…" she began "We just have to figure out where Lauren will stay…"

"Here! Like I said. I’ll be fine!" the girl in question protested again.

"No. I should’ve insisted when you moved here in the first place! You’re coming to my place!" Pascale said with a finality in her voice.

"But you won’t even be here for the next weeks! I can’t possibly just move into your apartment without you being there! That’s not right…"

"How about Lauren joins us at our holiday and you can figure out where she stays after? This way she’s not all alone for the next weeks. The house we’ve rented has enough rooms!" Arthur suggested and Lauren looked at him with big eyes.

"What? No-… that’s no… I can’t! This is family! I can’t intru-…" she stammered but stopped when Charles looked at her, a soft smile on his lips.

"You know what Arthur? I think that was the best idea you ever had!" he winked at his younger brother who shrugged his shoulders.

"Then it’s settled. You’re coming with us. No discussion… now come on… let’s pack!" Pascale excitedly clapped her hands together.

Lauren stood in front of the big yacht. Sedici. Sixteen. She turned to Charles, eyes big.

"How rich are you? Renting an entire yacht this size? That must cost a fortune!" she said shocked and he laughed.

"Now imagine how rich someone has to be to own it…" he winked and held out his hand for her to take.

"It’s yours?" she whispered shyly, carefully walking over the gangway.

"Yeah… I bought it last summer…" he nodded.

Lauren was at a loss of words, standing on board of the beautiful yacht. She knew that people in Monaco were richer than usually, it was Monaco after all. But she didn’t expect people to be that rich to have yachts like this. Or at least not normal people. Celebrities? Yeah. Millionaires? Of course. But Pascale had a hair salon. She knew that she wasn’t making a ton of money with it. So she didn’t think she was part of Monaco’s high society, so why would her son be?

"Lauren?" Charles gentle voice coaxed her out of her thoughts and she shook her head "You want me to give you a little tour?"

"Yeah. Sure…" she replied and followed him inside.

The yacht was beautiful. Simple, yet elegant. Everything shiny and sleek. The sofas looked soft and comfy. The beds in the cabins even more so. The upper deck with the steering wheel was her favourite place tho. It had a padded sundeck from where you could overlook the entire yacht.

"We’ll arrive in Ajaccio tonight and tomorrow in the morning we head to Olbia… or rather near Olbia…" Charles explained the route and Lauren looked at him "Don’t worry, I’m a pretty decent captain." he laughed.

"I’ve never been that long on the water…" she mumbled.

"Don’t worry, in the first aid kid we’ve got something against seasickness."

"That’s good to know." Lauren smiled when Arthur climbed up the stairs next to them.

"Everyone on board, we can take off." he said and Charles nodded.

"So, Lauren, will you be my co-captain for the day?" he asked her in a serious tone, too serious, and the girl laughed, a sound that made his heart flutter.

"It would be an honour, captain!" she replied and Charles smiled before he started to explain her the different buttons and displays on the dashboard.

Lauren watched Charles steer the yacht out of the marina onto the open sea with ease, a soft smile on his lips. It didn’t take long and the coastlines of Monaco and France were long gone behind them and after a while there was only the Mediterranean sea on the horizon. Lauren was fascinated with how at ease Charles was, almost as if he wouldn’t do anything else in his life then sailing the oceans. The light breeze in his hair, the dimples on his face, it made him all look even more handsome.

"Alright, we’re on the right course now…" Charles checked the displays and got up from his seat "Let’s go downstairs, meet the rest of the group."

"Yeah… sure…" Lauren nodded and followed him down the stairs.

She was nervous, meeting the rest of the family, Ava’s mother and Charles’ best friend, as he told her would be here as well, but she put on a brave smile and entered the cabin.

"Ahh there you are, we were just getting everything ready for a little lunch!" Pascale smiled at them "I was about to send Arthur up to come and get you…"

"I’m starving!" Charles said, kissing his mother’s cheek "Where’s Ava?"

"Charlotte is changing her diaper." Arthur replied when he walked in, a pretty girl following him "Lauren, this is Carla, my girlfriend. Carla meet Lauren."

"Hi, it’s nice to finally put a face to the name!" Carla smiled at her, pulling her into a light embrace "Pascale talked a lot about you!"

"Yeah, I heard about that…" Lauren replied, smiling at Carla.

"Oh don’t worry, she only said good things about you!"

"There are only good things to say about her!" Pascale added, smiling fondly at her young assistant, making her blush.

The door to the cabins downstairs opened and a breathtaking beautiful young woman walked out, cradling Ava to her chest. Lauren was sure that she must’ve been her mother. Ava didn’t look particularly like her, but just from how beautiful she was, her big smile, she was sure.

"All clean again!" she said in French "Oh, sorry! Hi, you must be Lauren! I’m Charlotte." she switched to English and smiled at her.

"Hi, nice to meet you." Lauren replied.

"Enzo will be out in a minute he had to change, this little one here peed on him…" she chuckled.

"Not funny!" a young man, Enzo probably, said, walking through the door "Hi Lauren! It feels like I already know you from how much Maman was talking about you! I’m Lorenzo, or Enzo, the older brother."

"The oldest. It’s just us…" Arthur whispered.

"Anyways. It’s nice to finally meet you in person!" Lorenzo smiled at Lauren.

"Nice to meet you too." she replied and watched how he gently slung his arm around Charlotte’s waist, pulling her to his side.

The movement felt intimate, lovingly, and Lauren wondered if her assumption, that Charlotte must be Ava’s mother and therefore Charles girlfriend, was right. As if Charlotte sensed her confusion she smiled at her.

"I’m Lorenzo’s girlfriend."

"Oh, okay… I thought that… umm- never mind…" Lauren said hastily when Ava turned her head a little and the moment she spotted Charles and Lauren she began to happily babble.

"Oh, sure, you see your dad and the rest of us is long forgotten…" Charlotte joked and walked over to Charles, but right when she wanted to hand him his daughter the little girl held her hand out to Lauren, chortling "Ohhh look at that…" Charlotte handed Ava over to Lauren and she immediately snuggled into her chest, sighing contently.

"Ouch… looks like you’re not her favourite any-…" Arthur laughed but stopped when Charles looked at him.

"It’s like I said… she has good taste in who she likes…" he smiled, gently brushing over Ava’s cheek "Really good taste."

"Sorry…" Lauren replied and he looked at her confused.

"For what?"

"I don’t know… she umm- she probably wanted to you… not me…" she said quietly and Charles began to laugh.

"Oh stop it, really." he smiled "She likes you, that’s not a bad thing!"

Lauren nodded slowly, feeling relieved and then looked down at Ava, half asleep.

"Oh wow, look! She’s almost asleep! This fast! Lauren, you’re a natural!" Arthur said impressed.

"Who’s a natural?" a dark haired boy walked inside, a plate of veggies and a basket full of bread in his hands "Ohhh the famous Lauren is here! I was wondering when Charles would finally come down and let us all meet you! He wanted you all to himself as it seemed…"

"Very funny, Joris…" Charles rolled his eyes "Lauren, this is my best friend, Joris. He thinks he’s funny… which he’s not…"

"You’re right… I’m not funny, I’m hilarious!" Joris wiggled his eyebrows and smiled at Lauren "It’s nice to meet you, Lauren… these boys went crazy about you, from all the things Pascale has told us about you!"

"Okay, okay, stop now! Leave her alone. That poor girl has to hear from all of you how much I talked about her all the time and feels uncomfortable if you people can’t tell!" Pascale stepped in and Lauren blushed a little "They are right, dear, I told them about you because I wanted you to meet them all. And now that that happened, let’s stop hogging at her like that, will you?"

Everyone mumbled in agreement and Lauren smiled shyly.

"It’s okay…" she said, looking down at Ava who made a little sound, but was still fast asleep.

"Here, you can put her down…" Charles lewd her to the side where a little crib stood and Lauren gently placed the little girl in the middle of it.

"She’s really gorgeous…" she whispered, loving the way Ava’s nose was scrunching up a little.

"She is…" Charles agreed and smiled at the way how Lauren looked at his daughter "Now come on, let’s eat…"

Lauren sat on the deck, stargazing when a shadow to her left caught her eye and she watched Charles making his way onto the deck.

"I guess I’m not the only one who couldn’t sleep then?" he said quietly and she nodded slightly.

"Yeah, I guess I first have to get used to the rocking of the boat while sleeping…"

"Oh. Yeah. That takes a few nights…" Charles chuckled looking at the girl next to him.

Lauren wore shorts and an oversized sweatshirt, her hair a messy bun on top of her head, but to Charles she looked breathtaking and he had to force himself to look away, to not keep on staring at her.

"Can I ask you something?" her voice hesitant.

"Sure."

"It’s really private and you don’t have to answer if you’re uncomfortable."

"Ask me." he knew the question already.

"Umm-… where is Ava’s mum?" Lauren looked at him and he kept his eyes trained on the dark horizon.

Lauren knew that she went too far, Charles was too quiet and right when she wanted to apologise he sighed, tilting his head to look at her.

"She’s not in our life. She never was… she didn’t want to be a mum, didn’t want to keep Ava, so I decided to take care of her alone. As a single dad…" there was some bitterness in his voice "It was a one night stand. A stupid mistake I made and when Ava’s mother came to me for help we wanted to give her up for adoption right after she was born… my life… my job, it’s hectic, stressful. I’m never for long in one place. Always on the road… I had to focus on my career, being a father didn’t fit into my lifestyle. And she didn’t want to be a mother. Not to a child with me at least. She’s from a religious and conservative family, they would’ve disown her if she was pregnant unmarried. Not in a relationship with the child’s father… so yeah, we had a plan…"

"But then you saw Ava and couldn’t do it?"

"No… it was even earlier… I saw her heartbeat on the ultrasound screen and I knew this little thing was mine… and I would do everything for it… flash forward and I have this beautiful little girl…" his voice wavered a little when he held up his phone that showed Ava sleeping in her crib.

"I would say you made the right decision. Ava… she’s wonderful…" Lauren smiled at him.

"Yeah… I know I made the right decision, but it’s hard… being away so often… leaving her behind all the time…"

"Okay, I have to ask this, what do you do for a living?" Lauren looked at him and Charles made big eyes.

"You don’t know?"

"No? How?"

"You’re living in Monaco?"

"And?" she was confused.

"And? Maman? She didn’t say anything?"

"No…"

"Okay… umm- well I’m a Formula 1 driver… for Ferrari…"

"Oh. Wow. That’s cool… I guess?"

"You guess?" Charles snorted and Lauren looked at him sheepishly "I guess you’re not into Formula 1 then?"

"No- not really… some of my family were but I never cared for 20 guys driving in circles…" she shrugged and Charles looked offended.

"Driving in circles? We are not driving in circles!" he gently nudged her shoulder "Ouch. That really hurts!"

"I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you!" Lauren chuckled, a sound Charles loved to hear.

"Yeah I can hear that! Unbelievable…" he shook his head laughing "Driving in circles… unbelievable… thank god you’re cute, otherwise I would’ve thrown you overboard!"

"Now you’re exaggerating!" Lauren laughed, although she felt her cheeks reddening.

"Absolutely not!" Charles shook his head.

"I’m very sorry for not knowing who you are, what you do and how big of a thing it is. Please accept my sincere apology." Lauren smiled at him.

"Apology accepted… but I’m coming back to this conversation and then-…" he began when Ava’s faint cries were heard from his phone "She saved you. For now…" he laughed and got up "You should also try to get some sleep…" he held out his hand and Lauren sighed, taking it.

"I guess I have to try and get used to the waves…"

"You definitely have to. We spent a lot of time on the water… and as part of the Leclerc clan, you will too." Charles smiled at her and when Lauren climbed into her bed, she couldn’t stop smiling, thinking about Charles words.

She was part of the Leclerc clan?

Lauren stepped off the dinghy onto the dock, looking at the big house in front of her and she gulped. Never before did she see a house, no mansion, like this before. It was huge. Beautiful. The pool alone was bigger than in some hotels she’s been before. The lawn looked so fresh, green and soft, she just wanted to lay down on it.

"What do you say?" Charles asked her and she tilted her head, looking at him with big eyes.

"I have no words…" Lauren replied and he laughed.

"I take it that’s something good?"

"It is… it really is…"

"Wait until you’ve seen the inside!" Carla took her hand and pulled Lauren with her "When Arthur showed me the pictures I was just… I was speechless!" the younger girl was excited and didn’t stop until they stood in the big living room and Lauren looked around.

It looked straight out of an interior design magazine. Everything was in warm shades of cream, beige and white. The huge windows let in the bright sunlight. The sofas looked like they were made out of the softest of fabrics. But what caught her eye was the big book shelf that spanned across the entire wall. It was like a library, from Shakespeare over Emily Brontë to The Lord of the Rings, a wide variety of different books were to find and she couldn’t stop herself from carefully pulling out a book here and there that piqued her interest. She completely forgot about where she was, or how long she was already looking through the books when Charles voice behind her made Lauren flinch and she turned around.

"What do you say?" he repeated his question from outside again.

"Wow…" was all she could say and he smiled.

"Wow indeed…"

"I was already saying to your mum that I need to find a bookstore so I could buy a book or two because… well this vacation was on such short notice that I didn’t have anything to read… but I guess that won’t be necessary anymore…"

"Nope, there are enough books for you to read…" Charles replied "Ready to see your room?"

Lauren only nodded and followed Charles through the house when he lead her to a hallway with 3 doors on each side. He opened the middle one on the right and walked inside, Lauren right on his heels.

"And this is your room…"

"Always when I think it can’t get any better this place surprises me even more…" she let out and walked over to the big French doors that lead onto the terrace with a beautiful view of the pool and the sea.

"My room is next to yours. I let you unpack and get settled… if you need anything, just let me know." Charles smiled and turned around, ready to leave the girl alone.

"Wait!" she went after him and when he turned around again Lauren hugged him "Thank you. Really."

"You don’t have to thank me!" Charles whispered, gently stroking her back.

"Yes I have to. You didn’t have to take me here with you…"

"I told you last night. You’re part of the Leclerc clan now…" he chuckled and Lauren pulled away a little, looking into his eyes.

"Well… then thank you for that…"

Lauren stood in front of the mirror, pulling the flimsy fabric into place. When she bought the bikinis a couple of weeks ago she didn’t think that she would spent a family vacation with her boss and her sons in Sardinia. But now that she looked in the big mirror in the bathroom she wasn’t sure if going out with what she was wearing was appropriate. She groaned frustrated and tried on the dark red bikini, that covered slightly more but still felt too exposed. She could hear some commotion outside at the pool and carefully pushed the curtain to the side, looking outside. She saw Charlotte sitting on a lounger and she wished she could see what she was wearing and if she was worried for nothing.

"Where’s Lauren?" she heard Carla’s voice from somewhere and stepped away from the window "Lauren?" she knocked on the French door.

"Come in…" Lauren replied.

"You’re missing out on all the fun!" she said when she stepped into the bathroom "Everything okay?" she was looking her up and down.

"It’s inappropriate, isn’t it?"

"What do you mean?" Carla asked confused.

"The bikini, I saw how you looked at it…"

"What? Oh god… no…" she laughed "It’s a bikini? What’s inappropriate about it? I was just thinking that I have the same one, but in a different colour."

"Isn’t it like a little too revealing?"

"And what am I wearing? Half of my ass is out!" she turned around showing Lauren the tight fit of her bikini bottoms "It’s a normal bikini. Were you hiding in here because of that?"

"I… Pascale is my boss… that’s her son’s out there… there’s a baby!" Lauren blushed and Carla gently patted her arm.

"It’s cute that you’re this considerate, but don’t worry. It’s all good! And now come on!" she pulled Lauren with her and together they stepped outside.

It was easy to fit into the group of people and it didn’t take long for Lauren to truly believe into Charles words, that she was a part of the Leclerc clan now.

As the sun was slowly starting to set over the horizon, Lauren stretched a little, soaking in the last rays of sunshine when she decided to have a quick shower before dinner. Only Arthur and Carla were still at the pool, the rest was already getting ready for dinner.

"See you later…" she smiled and got up, making her way over to the terrace, walking straight into, what she thought, was her bathroom. She didn’t notice the lack of her toiletries on the vanity, or the dark swim shorts that were hanging over the towel rack. She only wanted to wash the day off of her and pulled off her bikini top, then stepped out of her bottoms. She stepped inside the shower, starting the water stream and closed her eyes, relaxing. Her skin was hot and dry and she knew that she needed to moisturise her whole body after her shower but for now she just enjoyed the spray of the water. After a couple of minutes she grabbed the bottle of body wash that was provided, lathering her whole body up, it smelled masculine, pine wood and bergamot, but the scent was somehow familiar. She washed the last remaining bubbles off her body and grabbed one of the towels from the shelf, wrapping it around her, before she stepped outside of the bathroom, colliding with a warm, muscular body.

"Oh shit… shit… oh my god… I’m so sorry! I- I must’ve taken the wrong door outside… oh god…" Lauren’s face was flushed, her breathing ragged. She clutched the towel tight to her body, hoping that everything was covered "I’m- I’m so sorry!" she repeated.

"It’s okay… really! Umm- I- I didn’t even look, I didn’t see anything! I mean how? You’re wearing a towel! Do you say you’re wearing a towel? Sounds weird, no?" Charles rambled nervously, turning around and feeling all his blood rush down between his legs, just like when he saw Lauren stepping out in her bikini for the first time earlier today. That damn red bikini that made him feel like an aroused pre teen.

"I just grab my bikini and then I’m leaving! I’m so sorry, Charles…" he heard her walking back into the bathroom "I can’t believe it, this is so embarrassing…" she mumbled.

"Please, don’t be embarrassed! It���s okay, nothing happened…" Charles tried to reassure her but she didn’t reply, after a minute of silence he turned around, Lauren was gone "Damn…" he groaned and let himself fall into his bed, taking a deep breath.

It was only the first day and he was already wondering how he should manage to contain himself for the next two and a half weeks.

"This will be funny…" he sighed.

Chapter 11 - it’s summer break ☀️🕶️🏝️ and the family + Lauren need a little time to relax. They deserve it… and what can I say, Charles will have a hard time watching this gorgeous girl fitting into his life so effortlessly wearing nothing but cute bikinis… more next week 🤭

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Last but not least, English is not my first language and although I tried my best: please excuse any mistakes I made!

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[dearweirdme]

Sorry I'm sure you're tired of the airport head kiss asks. But my opinion is that if it were ANY other pairing from BTS everyone would most likely be agreeing it was a kiss. But since it's taekook ppl need to argue that it's anything but. It's exhausting being a tkkr sometimes... 🙄

Hi anon!

I think the issue is, that people think we’re claiming a definite romantic acts here.. and they’re partly right.. because within my believes about Tae and Jk I do think there’s things they do that are romantic. I don’t claim this moment as something inherently romantic though, but rather of their closeness and how they want to show that. That one anon’s ‘openly kissing in a public place’ is willfully turning our thoughts into something they are not. They wouldn’t say something like this about Tae kissing Jin on his head during a live.

Going to go a bit ranty here, because yesterday’s conversation has me thinking a lot…

None of the tkkrs I know are on here trying to figure out whether it’s Taekook or if it’s jikook. I’m sure there’s a subsection of fandom somewhere where that happens, but it’s very far from what we encounter here. It’s also not a mindset that I find agreeable, because it seems to originate from wanting to ship in general rather than actually seeing something special between two persons. What I am doing here and what most of us are doing here is looking at Tae and Jk and thinking about the extent of their relationship. Jkk is not a factor in that at all. For me Jm’s place in this is as both Jk and Tae’s friend and bandmember. Jkk as a fandom is spoken about because that fandom causes false narratives and hate, not because their ship ‘triggers me because deep inside I know it’s real’.

Talk about closeting comes with a lot of grey area imo. There’s a big deal of space between someone in a country where there’s a death penalty for being queer and who’s closeted and someone being closeted because their advisors tell them it’s bad for business. Both are horrible imo, and both can be extremely damaging on a personal level. It’s hard to speak about being privileged when it come to a closeted person, but at the same time I think such privilege does exist. It exists because aside from being queer.. there’s other factors that make up a person. Tae and Jk have the privilege of wealth and of having a great network of friends and family. I love knowing they have this privilege. I think it allows them some peace in a messed up situation that has harmed them immensely. I think they would have been out had it not been for their careers. Neither one of them is actually afraid of being seen as queer imo. What they’re afraid of is losing their careers and the effect it will have on BTS as a whole and the good they do through BTS. It’s also very much a question if their contract (which will have image clauses) allows them to be out at all. When I look at Tae especially, he’s not been afraid to show his queer self at all.. so I think there’s space that allows for signals.

I see their situation like this: there are things they definitely can’t do. Living together publicly, enlisting together, obviously romantic acts like kissing on the lips, telling the world they are queer, things that fall in that category in general.

There are also things Hybe hasn’t allowed, but that I feel would have been manageable. A taekook collab. Being portrayed as close friends throughout.

The grey area would be things that shows them as close, but not necessarily romantically involved. This is a huge area in my opinion and the reason why there’s so much discussion on ‘are they, aren’t they’. It’s why at times we see things that make us go 😳 (like hearing a person sleep next to Tae, and the sweetheart shirts, and the airport kiss, and Jk flying to Hawaii) but other times we have mentions of ‘why doesn’t Jk support Tae more’. It’s stuff that’s highly dependent on moments. Stuff that has temporary impact, but not much in the long run (like enlisting together will have).

This is what I apply to both Tkk and Jkk. There are things that I know can’t happen and there’s grey space.

Imagine for a bit being them. Being young, in one of the most popular bands in the world, still on a rise to more fame…. And you fall in love with each other. So deeply in love, it’s impossible not to be together, because you aren’t even able to stay away on a practical level. The company catches on.. what does your boss tell you? Does he tell you to hide and be professional or else you’re putting your (and your member’s) career at risk? Or does your boss go and allow you to publish footage of your romantic getaway to Tokyo for everyone to see? Does your boss give you boundaries to what you can do together or does he put a spotlight on the two of you as a duo?

It is exhausting to be a tkkr at times. I know I have gone through periods of huge fandom fatigue (honestly have only found pleasure in blogging back only recently) because of it. The exhaustion that comes from people trying to place what we say in black and whites, people willfully bending our words or only pointing out one specific sentence without looking at what we say as a whole. Tkk is a very sensitive topic for many. I try to balance my own peace and allowing for interesting conversations and different opinions, but it is hard at times. I’m at times too trusting, at times too reactive, at times I do get triggered. What’s helped me a lot though is just keeping my focus on Tae and Jk. Them together, but also them as individuals just give me such joy.. that truly trumps fandom shenanigans for me every time.

[yanaleese]

Hiii!! Js finished reading Eunsung's intro and I'm so interested in more about him,, what type of lover and yandere would he be?? Like his mannerisms/actions as a yandere and as a lover

ALSO BIG LOVE FOR KARMA + UR ART STYLE IS SO FIRE!!!

Hey Anon! Good to know you're interested in Eunsung, our baby 😫🥰💕

Bwahaha another Karma stan!!! Join the club Anon, and explore the depths of this weirdtastic blog. And ty!!! I've been feeling a little insecure about my art lately, so seeing this comment encourages me to keep drawing 😭😭😭😭

now AHEM back to ur question ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

In terms of Eunsung's Yandere type and mannerisms, it was slightly explained here, along with a bit of plot. But as a lover Eunsung would do the following:

Unfortunately, you and Eunsung would have a relationship hidden from the public eye. Eunsung is part of a cult, and to be with you is kind of unacceptable (until he figures out how to convince U-Jin, Dak-Ho, and the cult leader lol). Note that any gestures beyond friendly chatter results in your death. So any mannerisms from here on out would be based on such circumstances…

Eunsung would always greet you with a gentle kiss. He preferably likes to kiss your wrist, your cheek, and even your forehead (if he can ever reach it LMAO). It's his way of saying how much he loves your presence and to see how comfortable/tense you are at the moment.

Eunsung will always try to be accommodating. Meaning, he will always choose the venue that's best for you to meet at. He doesn't want to worry your heart with the details, the panic, the stress - after all, he knows that from his own experience as an idol.

Eunsung will always make you happy. No matter how baggy his eyes are, no matter how stressful his day is, he will never put his problems on you. Instead, he will do his best to treat you like royalty, a deity. He's never been able to call someone his own, so having you in his life makes him incredibly happy.

Eunsung LOVES to give you handmade gifts. Gifts that aren't bought or sold, but come from his heart. As your relationship progress, you'll notice a shift from "high-quality" gifts to heart-warming gifts. He'll pick up a lot of hobbies to create unique gifts for you, causing him to value his boundaries and his time. This would give a lot of people, including U-Jin and Dak-Ho - raised eyebrows.

Eunsung would bring board games for you to play with. He can't necessarily bring any devices since (1) his phone is always monitored, (2) your phone can act as a tracking device. So every meeting you have will be without technology (he hates that shit anyways).

Eunsung is needy. He'll beg you to kiss him, spoil him, soil him, hypnotize him, c̵̰͗̅ö̴͔̙ȓ̶͎̽r̴̢̰͆̅u̵̪͝p̵̖͛̈́t̵̢̪̆̑ ̷̛͙h̵͉̑̚i̴̫̹͌m̸̹̠̾ and so much more! He is a submissive femboy siren and he embarrassingly accepts it. (he also LOVES headpats, andlovescummingfromyourunderwear)

Eunsung would try and match with you, even if he's on stage. In your secret meetings, he'll try and arrange a dress code or something that only the two of you would know. So that way, when you are watching him, he can reciprocate smiles and pepper kisses in return.

Eunsung would have a diary about you. He'll share it with you every time you meet up, and he would read to you. And every single time he would tremble, stutter, and be a little nervous. But if it's you, Eunsung will gladly overcome his fears.

As a Yandere, he has a lot of variety. But right now I'm leaning towards him becoming a switch (both dominant, and submissive):

Eunsung would be a lot more manipulative, and tune in to his darker side. Eunsung is never the type to deceive someone, but he will do so if you're on the line. Eunsung may not be knowledgeable, but he has high levels of emotional intelligence. It's just that he "dumbs it down" or "turns off his brain" since he has little to no confidence in himself. Hence why the cult leader, Ha-Neul, is so strict when it comes to Eunsung critically thinking for himself. He makes sure Eunsung has no time to process anything, which explains why the sirenic idol is constantly booked.

Eunsung will tune into his powers. Even though I do forget sometimes, Eunsung is an acquatic god that can control the seas with his voice (if he wants to). But he would have to re-train in secret, since Ha-Neul wants to keep Eunsung weak and dependent on the cult.

Eunsung will become jealous. He's never had anything for himself, so why on earth should he give you up? So, if anybody looks at you in a way that displeases him...he'll whimper, tug your shirt, and start crying. Meanwhile, he'll call up his cult and/or his fanbase to ridicule the person, haunt them, murder them or put their corpse on display.

Eunsung would become a major gaslighter. Conditioned to care for everyone, Eunsung ultimately cares about no one (except you) - as he has little to no time with the people he meets. So instead of being polite, and sugarcoating things...Eunsung would just politely gaslight you, and slowly let your body burn in a fire verbally. By the time you realize, you'll be so stunned, perplexed, and worried. Ironically, Eunsung learns to gaslight fast since he's been born in a cult full of manipulators, gaslighters, and abusers alike. He'll probably be proficient at mental and physical torture as well!

Eunsung's self-esteem will be entirely dependent on you. YOU were the one that brought him meaning, brought him back to life. Your validation, your opinions of him are so important that any negative statement will shatter him completely, and begin a mental breakdown. He won't be able to sing, work, or just live. He can't let you go, and won't let you go. He'll do anything to appease you, even if means killing himself.

[revna-writes]

Results of Writing Trade #2!

Trade with: @obstinatejules (actual living angel I think)

Results from the trade!

"To Build a Home" obstinatejules - Chapter 1 - Original Version revna-writes - Chapter 1 - Rewritten Version

"Le Academiae Artes Notoria" revna-writes - Chapter 1 - Original Version obstinatejules - Chapter 1 - Rewritten Version (wow)

overall thoughts

For one, wow, that was super fun. I'm honestly amazed by how well this entire experience lived up to my expectations lol. Part of that is definitely due to obstinatejules being so cool, she was super fun to write with and bounce ideas off of. Plus, I got great material to work with :)

But also, fun aside, it was so helpful??

Writing skills I grew doing this:

Literary analysis and reflection: I spent a long time reading the original and taking notes on a lot of stuff: the characters, their characterization, the plot points, what the piece means, what its themes are, what emotions it is exploring and how, unique aspects of the way it is written, and, 'what unique aspects can I introduce to accentuate and build on this foundation?'

Slice of life / fluff / fanfic genres: I don't have a lot of experience in these worlds, and It was really cool learning about specific phrases, tropes, ways of description, etc., and how to combine them to really make the piece live up to its genre

2nd Person Perspective: very new for me. It has its own considerations- for example, it's much more intimate for the reader, which is both its greatest strength and weakness.

Present tense: as a limited 3rd person past tense girlie, swapping to present tense was hard!! But also really interesting. There really are tense-specific ways to express things that do not work in past tense, and it was fun playing around with those & learning how to make present tense work for me. There is absolutely a different feel to the writing, and as steeped in past tense as I am, I didn't really realize it could make a big difference. I'm excited for the day when I choose to make a story present tense as an artistic choice because of the things unique to it.

Communication skills: Throughout this process with the chapter trades, you know, I'm talking to a bunch of different people with a bunch of different backgrounds, across multiple different generations. So, I'm having to figure out ways for each person to best connect with them, assess our expectations for what's going down, and then also our timeframe, what chapters we want to trade, and then any questions we may have about each other's piece. It's been really good to get me out of my shell, and also, it's helped me relax a little bit and communicate 'more effectively'.

There's also some more nebulous things, like, being intimately introduced to the way someone else writes fundamentally shifts the way I write ever so slightly. I am introduced to brand new ideas, new narrative techniques, new word choices for the same ideas and emotions, and I'm introduced to these in a way that is so much different than how I would see them as a reader.

Anyway, that's enough rambling from me lol.

Writing Trade!!

Hear ye, hear ye, it's time for a writing trade!

How It Works

You DM me, "I'd like to trade!" (or anything else that indicates you want to participate!)

We exchange chapters. I send you a link to mine, you send me a link to yours, we read each other's chapter.

We each re-write the other's chapter! In our own style, with our own approach, but hitting all the same plot points with the same characters.

We exchange the re-written chapters!

Okay but what's the point?

It's a great way to develop your skills!

You get to see how someone else would handle the same story!

You get to share and talk about your story (critically!!) with another author!!

We get to have fun together!! with writing!! (:o?!?!)

I want to do this with someone so BAD, hfdgkjfngkfd!!!! Seriously y'all i am FIENDING to do some cute writing trades.

If you are interested, please DM me!

[perfectsunlight]

[35] DAD

warnings: paternal absence

FLASHBACK

ivory had always known her life wasn’t exactly normal. but it wasn’t until she was six years old, sitting in her classroom with a crayon clutched in her tiny fingers, that she realized just how different it was.

the classroom was warm, sunlight spilling through the large windows, casting golden patches onto the wooden desks. outside, she could hear the distant shouts of kids playing during recess, the rhythmic thud of a basketball bouncing against pavement. the air smelled like glue and paper, the familiar scent of a classroom deep in an arts-and-crafts project.

at the front of the room, ms. kang clapped her hands together, a warm smile on her face. “alright, class! since parents’ day is coming up, we’re going to make special thank-you cards for our parents or guardians! you can draw your family and write a nice message to show them how much you love and appreciate them.”

excited chatter filled the room instantly. ivory watched as the other kids reached for their supplies—picking out their favorite colors, chattering about what their parents liked.

“my dad likes fishing!” one boy announced proudly, holding up a blue crayon. “my mom loves cooking! she always makes yummy food.” a girl said beside him, already scribbling on the card stock.

jane picked up a pink crayon, twirling it between her fingers. she knew what to draw—her and her mom. her small hands moved carefully, outlining a simple figure with dark hair and big eyes—her mom, of course. then, next to her, a smaller version of herself, holding her mother’s hand.

she was focused, tongue poking slightly out of the corner of her mouth, when a voice beside her made her pause.

“where’s your dad?”

ivory blinked, glancing up at the boy sitting next to her. minho. he was peering at her drawing, his own half-finished card lying on the table. a scribbly drawing of a man and a woman stood on his page, a big heart between them.

she looked back at her drawing.

where was her dad?

she suddenly felt self-conscious, staring at the blank space next to her mother. the realization hit her like a quiet wave—everyone else was drawing two parents. two figures holding hands. two sets of arms wrapping around them.

but she only had one.

the pink crayon in her hand felt heavier now. “i don’t have one,” she mumbled, unsure of why the words felt strange on her tongue.

minho frowned. “huh? what do you mean? everybody has a dad.” jane’s tiny fingers tightened around the crayon defensively. “well, i don’t,” she said, a little more firmly this time.

the dark haired boy gave her a puzzled look, like she had just told him she didn’t have a belly button. or that she was an alien. or that she had four arms instead of two. 

“that’s weird,” he muttered before going back to his drawing.

ivory sat frozen. her heart thudded loudly in her chest, a strange, uncomfortable feeling creeping in. she had never really thought about it before. she had her mom. that had always been enough.

but now, for the first time, she felt like she was missing something.

jieun could tell something was wrong the moment ivory climbed into the car.

the little girl was unusually quiet, her small hands folded in her lap, eyes staring at nothing in particular.

“you’re quiet today, sweetheart,” jieun said gently, glancing at her through the rearview mirror. “did something happen at school?”

ivory hesitated, her grip tightening on the paper in her hands.

after a long moment, she finally asked, “grandma, why don’t i have a dad?”

the question was soft, hesitant, but it sliced through the air like a blade. jieun’s fingers tightened around the steering wheel. she had been expecting this question for years, but somehow, she still wasn’t prepared.

“what made you ask that, love?” she asked, keeping her voice steady.

the young girl looked down at the card in her hands, tracing the edges of the paper with her fingers. “we were making cards for parents’ day and minho said everybody has a dad.”

jieun inhaled sharply, glancing at the little girl’s reflection in the mirror. “oh, baby,” she murmured, her heart aching at the confusion on her granddaughter’s face. jane finally looked up and met her stare in the mirror’s reflection. 

“so do i have one?”

jieun took a slow breath before answering carefully.

“yes,” she said gently. “but he’s not here.”

ivory frowned. that wasn’t fair. if she had a dad, why wasn’t he around? why didn’t he wear ties or pick her up from school like her friends’ dads?  “where is he?” she couldn’t comprehend that perhaps her father was a man who actively made the decision to not be in her life. surely her dad must be more busy than her mom. or maybe he was some secret agent, or a spy? that would explain why he wasn’t around for her or jennie.

jieun’s grip on the steering wheel tightened until her knuckles turned white. she could feel ivory’s expectant gaze in the mirror, those big, searching eyes that reminded her so much of jennie when she was young—curious, determined, relentless.

how was she supposed to answer this? how could she explain something so heavy, so painful, to a child who still believed the world was fair?

there were so many things jieun could say. so many ways she could frame it. but in the end, she settled for the truth—at least, as much of it as her granddaughter needed to hear.

“that’s something for your mom to tell you,” she said, her voice soft. “but what i can tell you is this—your mother loves you more than anything in the world. more than anything.”

once they got home, ivory was quieter than usual. she didn’t run inside like she normally would, kicking off her shoes and shouting about her day. instead, she trailed behind jieun, clutching the card she had made in school, her tiny fingers wrinkling the edges.

jieun watched her carefully, noting the way her little shoulders were tense, the way her brows furrowed in deep thought. it broke her heart, but there was nothing she could do—this was something jennie had to handle.

“ivory, sweetheart,” jieun called gently as she set her purse down on the kitchen counter. “why don’t you go wash up before dinner?”

ivory hesitated but eventually nodded, dragging her feet as she shuffled toward the bathroom.

jieun exhaled, her gaze drifting toward the clock. jennie would be home very soon. she should give her a warning—prepare her for the conversation she was about to have.

and sure enough, just as jieun was finishing up setting the table, the front door clicked open. the idol stepped inside, looking exhausted from her long day, her coat hanging off one shoulder, her hair tied back in a loose ponytail. she barely had time to kick off her heels before jieun greeted her with a knowing look.

jennie knew something was up. jane always came running the moment that door opened. she could feel the tension in the air, and she braced herself for whatever was coming next. her heart started to pound, sensing something she couldn’t quite place. she’d been so focused on her work, her schedule, and the whirlwind of the past few weeks, but in that moment, everything felt off. her maternal instincts were on overdrive, her fine tuned senses picking up on the usual lightness of home being significantly heavier. jennie dropped her bag by the door, peeling off her coat and hanging it up with mechanical precision, her thoughts already racing ahead to what might be waiting for her.

jieun’s gaze lingered on her, and for a split second, jennie could feel the weight of something unspoken. it was in the way her mother was holding herself, the subtle way her fingers fidgeted with the edge of a napkin, a tiny indication that something was wrong.

“hey, where is she?” jennie asked, her voice casual but carrying a note of concern. she usually didn’t go a minute without seeing her daughter, especially when she was home. the house felt unusually quiet without her baby girl’s bright energy.

jieun sighed, her shoulders relaxing a bit as she finally spoke. she knew jennie could feel something was off. after all, jieun was a mother herself. she knew that maternal intuition was a lifeline. “she’s in her room.” she replied gently. jennie nodded, instinctively heading toward the hallway. but before she could take a step, jieun called out softly, “but there’s something you need to know.”

the words hung in the air like a delicate thread, fragile and heavy. the mentioned woman turned back to look at her, confusion on her knitted brows. “what’s wrong? is everything okay?” 

“she asked about her father.”

jennie froze. and suddenly she was transported back in time to when she was her daughter’s age, asking about the absence of her own father. the weight of the words fell over jennie like a heavy blanket, the breath caught in her chest. she couldn’t speak for a moment, her mind frozen, replaying the question she herself had asked so many years ago. she had been just a girl, no older than ivory, when she asked her mother the same thing. 

where’s my dad?

jennie had never truly gotten an answer, just vague explanations that never quite felt like the truth. her father had left when she was still young, his absence an unwelcome shadow over her childhood. even now, that innocent question lingered like a scar, untouched and unhealed.

“jennie?” the voice of her own mother in front of her broke through her thoughts. “what’s wrong? is everything okay?”

the idol swallowed hard, but her throat felt tight, as if the words wouldn’t come. it took a long moment before she found her voice again, weak but steady. jennie’s gaze drifted toward the floor, her hands wringing nervously in front of her.

“she deserves answers. and i don’t know how to give them to her.”

the room felt smaller all of a sudden, like the walls were closing in. she could feel the weight of it all—the guilt, the fear, the lingering shame of never having provided ivory with the answers she so desperately wanted.

jennie had promised herself, when she was pregnant, that she would never put her daughter through the same pain she had experienced growing up without a father. yet, here they were. her baby girl, just as confused as she had once been, asked the question she had always dreaded: why don’t i have a dad?

jennie had never told ivory the truth about her father—who he was, why he wasn’t around, or how he had made the choice to leave. in the beginning, it was easier to tell herself that jane didn’t need to know, that she would be enough. but as her daughter grew older, the cracks in that facade began to show. 

now, with that question hanging in the air between them, jennie didn’t know how to fix it.

she felt the tears welling up in her eyes, but she blinked them away, trying to hold it together. she couldn’t break down now. not when ivory needed her the most.

the other woman in the room, watching her carefully, took a step closer. “it’s not your fault, jennie,” she said softly, almost as if reading her mind. “you can’t control everything, especially not him.”

“i know. but it doesn’t make it any easier.” she exhaled shakily, her thoughts spiraling. “she doesn’t deserve to feel abandoned. i promised myself she wouldn’t grow up like i did—feeling like something was missing. but i’ve failed her.”

“no, you haven’t.” the woman’s voice was firm, insistent. “you’ve done everything you can to protect her, to give her the life you didn’t have. you’re doing the best you can, my dear. don’t let that guilt take away from everything you’ve given her already.”

jennie looked up, meeting the woman’s eyes, and for the first time in what felt like forever, she allowed herself to take a breath. it wasn’t all her fault. she couldn’t change the past, but she could shape the future for ivory. she could still be the mother ivory needed.

but the truth about her father... that was something jennie wasn’t sure she was ready to face. let alone tell her daughter.

the silence hung heavily in the room, and jennie couldn’t escape the crushing weight of the question that lingered in her life for a second time now.

she could feel the distance between her and ivory growing, a gap that no amount of love could fill. how was she supposed to bridge that gap when the one thing her daughter needed most—answers—was the one thing jennie could not give?

her body moved automatically to her daughter’s bedroom. her feet carried her down the familiar hallway, each step heavier than the last. she passed by the framed pictures on the walls—moments frozen in time, snapshots of happier times. her hand rested briefly on the doorframe of ivory’s room before she slowly pushed the door open.

ivory’s room was as it had always been—warm toned, cozy, with little pieces of her personality scattered throughout. the stuffed animals, the beanbag in the corner, the little gifts jennie had gotten her from her travels overseas. but tonight, it all seemed so distant, so out of place. jennie’s gaze settled on the bed, the unmade sheets, and the quiet stillness that filled the room. it was as though the walls were waiting for something that wasn’t coming.

she stepped inside, closing the door softly behind her, and took a deep breath. the scent of her daughter’s perfume still lingered in the air—familiar, comforting, yet so painfully absent. she sat on the edge of the bed, her fingers lightly brushing against the soft fabric of the blanket. the weight of the silence in this room was deafening. it was like her life had been paused, suspended in time, and the only thing she could think about was the absence of the one person who had meant everything to her.

jennie’s mind flashed back to the past, to those late nights when she would sneak into ivory’s room just to watch her sleep, to feel the warmth of her daughter’s presence. she’d done everything in her power to protect ivory, to give her a life filled with love and opportunity. but now, it felt like everything was unraveling at once. and the worst part? 

she didn’t know how to fix it.

ivory’s bathroom was joined to her bedroom, and she saw the back of her daughter’s head as she finished washing her hands. turning around, jane’s eyes lit up slightly at the sight of her mother on her bed. 

jennie’s heart ached as she watched her daughter move about the room, the quiet swish of jane’s hands as she dried them on the towel, the soft thud of her footsteps as she stepped toward the bed. it was the kind of simple moment that felt monumental—like a scene frozen in time, the unspoken distance between them widening with every second that passed. she longed for the carefree days, when her daughter would run to her after a long day, when laughter filled the house, when nothing seemed impossible to mend.

but those days felt so far away now, slipping through her fingers like sand.

ivory stopped in front of the bed, her eyes still lighting up slightly, but it was a hesitant glow—a flicker of something that was there and then gone, as if even her daughter could sense the weight of the silence hanging between them.

"did grandma tell you?" ivory began, her voice unsure, quiet. as if she was trying to pull something from jennie, some kind of confirmation she was desperately searching for. her fingers fidgeted with the hem of her sleeve, a small, nervous habit she’d developed over the years.

jennie could feel the hesitation in the air. she could see the faint lines of worry across her child’s face, the tension in her shoulders. the question was hanging there, but it wasn’t just about what grandma had said—it was about something deeper. 

something that neither of them wanted to address, but had to.

jennie cleared her throat, trying to steady herself, her fingers curling tighter into the fabric of the sheets beneath her. “yes.” her voice was soft, coaxing, though it carried the underlying tremor of her own fears.

silently, jane pointed to the card face down on her nightstand, the one she had made at school. curious, her mother picked it up and flipped it over.

jennie felt the cool edge of the card as she picked it up, her heart heavy in her chest. the card was face down, like her daughter didn’t want to give anything away just yet. the idol’s hands were gentle as she flipped it over, her eyes scanning the simple design.

there were no elaborate drawings, no over-the-top doodles that usually came with children’s creations. instead, there was a single  message on the front, written carefully in six year old ivory’s handwriting.

for mom.

a lump formed in jennie’s throat as she traced the words with her fingers. the card wasn’t a father’s day card, and it wasn’t a “thank you” card. it was simply for her—just for jennie. 

not jennie kim, the idol. just jennie kim, the mother.

she could feel the weight of the unspoken words in the simplicity of the gesture. ivory hadn’t needed to say anything for jennie to understand. she had already said everything through this small act of defiance.

her eyes blurred slightly, emotion threatening to spill over. jane had already been through so much in her life, things a child shouldn’t have to carry. the absence of a father, the pressure of being constantly in the shadows of her mother’s career, and yet, here ivory was, still giving everything of herself. not asking for anything but her presence, her love.

the woman swallowed hard, taking a moment to compose herself. the tightness in her chest was unbearable, but it wasn’t just sadness—it was pride. pride in the person her child was becoming, even when things around them weren’t ideal. she reached down to slide her hand under the card, feeling the weight of it as though it were the most precious thing in the world.

ivory watched her mother’s expression closely, her own face unreadable. the silence between them was thick, heavy, but there was something unspoken in it that made everything clearer. the words they couldn’t bring themselves to say floated between them, settling in the air like the softest promise.

“come here, valentine.” jennie whispered as she held her arms open.

ivory hesitated for only a moment before she climbed into her mother’s embrace. her small body nestled against jennie’s chest, the familiar scent of her mother's perfume grounding her in a way nothing else could. the card, the unspoken words, the weight of the world they both carried—it all seemed to melt away in the quiet of this simple moment.

jennie wrapped her arms around her young child tightly, pulling her close as though she could protect her from everything—the pain, the loneliness, the uncertainty that loomed so heavily over both of them. she rested her cheek against ivory’s downy hair, feeling the soft warmth and for a moment, she didn’t need to say anything.

“mom,” ivory’s voice was barely a whisper, the words soft but loaded with so much weight, so much vulnerability, that they seemed to linger in the air, suspended between them. jennie froze for a moment, the sound of her daughter’s voice cutting through the quiet of the room like a tender ache. she slowly turned her head, her breath catching in her chest. “yeah, baby?” her voice was thick with emotion, thick enough that it was hard to speak, hard to hold back the flood of feelings rising up in her throat. she reached down, her hand trembling slightly, and began to stroke ivory’s back in slow, soothing motions, as if her touch could somehow convey everything her heart felt.

“i love you.” the words were soft but simple, filled with a rawness that made jennie’s heart lurch. ivory’s words weren’t just a declaration; they were a plea, a balm, a promise all wrapped into one. they held the weight of everything that had been left unsaid, every silent worry and longing that had built up over the years.

jennie’s chest tightened, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. she felt the gravity of those words deep in her bones, and a rush of warmth flooded through her, radiating out from her daughter’s words. she wasn’t sure when it happened, when it became clear, but in that moment, all the world seemed to pause, and all that mattered was the love that passed between them, unspoken yet undeniable.

“i love you too,” jennie whispered, her voice shaky as she pressed her lips to the crown of her child’s head, as though sealing that promise with a kiss. her hand still rested gently on her daughter’s back, fingers splayed across the softness of her shirt, holding her as close as she possibly could. there was nothing else she needed to say, no more explanations or apologies.

ivory didn’t need anything else. she didn’t need a dad—she had her mom. and that was enough.

jennie felt her heart swell with emotion, the tightness in her chest both painful and comforting. she had been a single mother for so long, carrying the weight of both roles, trying to be enough for her child despite the challenges that came with it. 

and now, in this simple moment, she realized that she had succeeded.

for the first time in a long time, jennie felt at peace with the life they had built together, the one that had been their own, separate from the chaos of the world around them. she could face whatever came next, because in the end, she had her daughter.

and that was more than enough.

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CLOSED.

[xshingie]

More Richter/Annette rambling as I work through my writing process, because what else am I doing here really

Sobs I received my first in-depth comment on my Richette oneshot where someone FINALLY noticed all the love and labor I poured into depicting the multiple dimensions of Annette. At the time, it was important to me that depict Annette as flawed (and that Richter loved her anyway!).

It makes me really sad when I see people so openly talk and joke about how they didn’t care for Richter/Annette in S1, but of course my brain had to completely hyperfixate on Annette back then. I loved her grief, her anger, her shortsightedness and her eventual soft side -- all these parts are equally valid parts of her and I loved how much the show gave her space to express it unapologetically. Something about her character journey to not see beyond black-and-white judgments, to grow her perception of the world through a more nuanced lens, to question and look deeper within herself instead of just being fueled on on her anger-driven trauma, to be kinder to herself and others, to learn to listen to understand holistically -- there were so many elements that captivated me back then to write for Annette and she lived so vibrantly in my brain... and I wonder when I will be able to move on, because everybody else will quickly move on and I will be in the same place as I was Fall 2024, with Richter, Annette, and Edouard so vividly continuing to occupy my brain .-.

I was venting to a fandom friend in DM about how fucking embarrassing to hyperfixate on unpopular side characters like Annette and Edouard. And coming to terms of swallowing the bitter reality that the reasons why I continue to write for Richter/Annette aren’t things anyone want to read about. Ultimately, I just gotta own up to what I’m hyperfixating on and write for myself.

As I study Vodouism further to analyze what elements did or didn’t make into the show (esp. any inaccuracies), I realized how much of Annette’s journey in S1 and S2 is a visual metaphor of going deeper into the ounsi initiation process (receiving a potèt from Ogou which is likely her Met Tet, being guided by Met Kalfou rather than just Papa Legba, becoming a chwal for Sekhmet, home being synonymous with interconnected). Despite its limited depictions or any inaccuracies, at the heart of it the show captures the “spirit” or thematic element. Noticing especially where they look creative liberties informs potential approaches that I could take.

My latest Richter/Annette (written before S2) oneshot reflects my first attempt to incorporate Haitian Vodou philosophy and wisdom, although I did creative liberties. In my last post (“Vodou in Haiti: Way of Life and Mode of Survival”) I explored how Cecile’s message to Annette in S1 hits on the fundamental tenets of Vodou philosophy and wisdom.

Remember, Annette -- no matter where you are, as long as you allow yourself to feel, to listen - you will be able to feel the Iwa that connects us all. Whether the stirrings of a single blade of grass in the wind, the breath of an animal taking its last, or the rumblings of the soil beneath you. Even the whisperings from the ones you love, when they are no longer with you. All around, everywhere, within you; it is here, and it will be over there. The threads that connect us all, no matter how big a beast or small of a drop of rain; these are the connections, the connections that transcend beyond the realm of our earth. 

This excerpt written by me is a condensed phrasing from Michel’s paper on Vodou being interconnected, spinning some creative liberties. I’m really proud of myself of how I was able to end the oneshot. It ends with Annette allowing herself a peace of mind that she couldn’t before in Richter’s presence, therefore wholly integrating for the first time, what Cecile was trying to tell her.

And so Annette closed her eyes, and allowed herself to listen, to feel. To listen to his comforting, soft breaths as he slumbered beside her. To feel the adumbrations from her own heart as she recalled the image of Richter’s eyes -- that moment when that icy blue frost began to taper against the shuttering of his eyelids when he had looked at her, just right before he finally closed them. 

Something I’ve thought about a lot, especially as I work through my existing WIP is how Richter can inspire Annette’s character growth or why she might be drawn to him. And in completing this oneshot, I think I answered my own question. That sometimes, it’s a matter of the right person, the right time, at that certain phase in your life of learning the lesson you need to. It really is that simple, really.

[cryingatwindermerepeaks]

Little!April - Supportive

Regressuary day 10 … prompt: Character A wants to wear diapers to help with their regression. Character B tries their best to be supportive. (@mcschnuggles)

Wanted to very very clearly start this off by saying this is ENTIRELY sfw and any interaction with this post that seems even remotely nsfw will be blocked immediately. I couldn’t care less what you do in your personal life but this is my safe space. Anyway, I know this can be a difficult topic in the agere community but I wanted to write something to help padded regressors feel more accepted within the community <3

Word count: 1132

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Accidents weren’t really a problem with April, she was usually capable of getting herself to the bathroom on time when she was little but that’s more where the problem lay. Everytime the girl needed to use the restroom she’d immediately pull herself out of her regressed headspace and struggled to return to it later even when she really needed it. Leslie and Ben noticed very quickly that this frequently resulted in April being extra irritable for the rest of the day which no one needed. They tried to address the topic gently, making sure to approach April about their concerns while she was big and Andy was out.

“We just want to make your regression as safe for you as possible,” Ben explained gently.

“And we thought maybe some protection could help with that,” Leslie added. April’s face scrunched up and burnt red, her fists tightening around the soft blanket she was sitting under. The suggestion made her feel small and nervous even though Mummy and Dada had said they wanted to talk with big April. She couldn’t help it. “Oh baby, does it make you that upset to think about?” Leslie cooed gently, not wanting to make April uncomfortable. The younger girl whined, rubbing her fists at her eyes, the thought of crying right now was making her feel even more embarrassed. The problem was that she didn’t know if it made her upset, or if she was particularly opposed to the idea. In fact, a part of her did think it might be nice to try. It all just felt so different and new, April hated change. She stood up from the couch abruptly, stomping off to her bedroom and slamming the door. She didn’t mean to seem angry but her body felt like it was about to burst. She just needed some time to think.

Leslie and Ben were understandably worried about April but decided not to push her too far in case they made it worse. She stayed in her room all afternoon and eventually Andy returned from band practice. “Where’s ‘Pril?” He questioned, eager to play with the younger girl after he’d been out all day.

“She’s in the bedroom but she needs some space right now, ok?” Ben warned gently, looking up from the book he’d been reading on the couch.

“Why?” Andy questioned, April never needed space from him - from other people yes, but never Andy.

Leslie and Ben shared a look, “it’s not really our spot to tell you about it buddy,” Leslie explained. Andy crossed his arms with a frown, if it related to April it related to him.

He went off to their room, leaving Leslie and Ben worried on the couch. They decided April could handle herself if she wanted Andy to leave her alone and decided to go start making dinner - Calzones.

After a while April and Andy both emerged from the bedroom, hands intertwined and April standing slightly behind Andy with her pacifier in her mouth. They hovered in the entrance of the kitchen for a moment before Andy spoke up. “April’s gonna try diapers.” Both Leslie and Ben looked up in shock, they certainly hadn’t expected that. April whined and tugged on Andy’s hand, as if to remind him of something. “Oh right, and I’m going to try pull-ups.”

“That’s very kind of you kiddo,” Ben smiled softly.

Andy shrugged, wrapping April in a big bear hug. “It’ll make ‘Pril feel better and I have accidents too sometimes so I think it will be a good idea.”

***

The diapers and pull-ups arrived a few days later, April’s had little purple stars on the front and that made her feel a bit better, at least they were cute. It took a bit of gentle reassurance from Leslie, Ben and Andy, before April agreed to actually try them on. “What if I don’t like it?” She’d asked Leslie nervously, eyeing the package which Leslie had placed on the bed.

“Then we can take it off and you never have to try them again, ok?” April nodded. She was already feeling small and it made the idea of Ben and Leslie taking care of her like this comforting. Plus, the thought that Andy was just down the hall with Ben helping him put on a pull-up made her feel much less embarrassed. She grabbed onto her stuffed dog version of Champion and wordlessly lay down on the bed.

“You’re doing so well bub,” Leslie cooed as she helped April into the diaper. April blushed, keeping her eyes trained on the ceiling above her. She soothed the soft fur of her stuffie back and forth against her cheek to keep her calm. “Do you want a onesie?” April nodded eagerly, feeling incredibly small as Leslie changed her.

“Dino please,” she mumbled around her fingers which had made their way into her mouth. Leslie picked out April’s favorite green hooded dinosaur onesie and helped her into it. The fabric was so soft and the hood was good for hiding in.

“You’re all set baby dino,” she cooed. April sat up, suddenly too excited by the fact she was dressed up like a dinosaur to care about the diaper. She roared playfully, making Leslie smile and kiss her forehead. “Does it feel ok?”

“It’s ok mummy,” she shrugged, her tummy twisting anxiously at the thought of actually talking about it. Leslie sighed, recognising April’s hesitance.

“It’s ok not to like it, and it’s also ok if you do. It’s also ok if you decide not to use it or if you do.” she explained gently, tucking April’s hair behind her ears.

April squirmed, “I think I like it… feels safe,” she explained nervously. Leslie smiled,

“That’s all we wanted, baby. For you to feel safe.” April nodded and stood up, reaching out to hold onto the hem of Leslie’s shirt as they walked out to the living room. Andy was sat on the floor, playing with his toy cars in just a pull-up and Mouserat t-shirt. She immediately felt at ease realising she wasn’t alone.

“‘Pril! Wanna play racing cars?” He asked excitedly. A part of April wanted to stay holding on to Leslie because she felt smaller than usual and Mummy was so safe but at the same time she wanted to play with Andy. She took a deep breath, Ann always told her it was a good way to ground herself, and then let go of Leslie’s shirt so she could sit on the floor beside Andy. He pulled her into his lap as he often did when they were playing together. This felt safe, part of it was different and new but that didn’t necessarily mean it was scary and bad. And she definitely wasn’t alone so it would be ok.