#you just make me find it hard to socialize and make friends and learn about stuff that’s not in my interest FoR fUn???
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Friendship and relationships are hard, I'm lonely and can't be loved by anyone, so here's some hard realities and wisdom from someone who's going to die sad and alone inevitably:
Many of you have got to try to put some effort in nurturing your relationships with your friends, or at least more clearly negotiate what your friends can and can't expect from you in the long-term.
Seriously, this whole 0-contact-aside-from-reacting-through-each-other's notes and proclaiming you're ride-or-die about someone for it? Is literally killing me. I've actually been dealing with suicidality because of how impossible it is to stay in touch with, or even on good terms with, people I thought were my friends but ghosted me, and then acted bewildered when I was angry with them for it or didn't acknowledge them as my friend anymore. "You can't be mad at me for not answering your DMs for 7 years! We're friends! I still reblog your reblogs!"
I am absolutely allowed to be angry, and I absolutely can demote you in my mind from "person I thought was a friend" to "mutual that ignores me until they need a dopamine fix or an answer to a specific question".
Months or years of unprompted, unbroken silence is not friendship - acquaintenceship, sure, but not friendship. It's a bad friend that expects love and loyalty by default no matter how long they've been ghosting their friends.
Love and loyalty are like a garden: they require cultivating and a commitment to nurture and grow, or else it gradually withers, and eventually dies. Earning the love and loyalty of a friend and then abandoning the garden of that relationship is how you find yourself locked out of your former friend's garden, or find them lonely, miserable, and exhausted from trying to keep the garden thriving when they themselves have slowly been dying inside because you haven't come back to the garden in years.
You have to learn to reach out and nurture your relationships. If you're autistic or otherwise have problems socializing, there are still some skills that you need to learn to avoid being isolated and friendless at the end of the day. Being autistic with trouble socializing is not an excuse to treat people you call your friends or that you claim to love like hobbies you can leave and come back to whenever you feel like - I learned this the hard way as an autistic person with shit social skills.
You have to negotiate what a friend can expect from you if you're an Outside Cat Friend that only drops in when you have specific reasons to reach out. It can be heartbreaking being the friend left waiting for a reply or a text without knowing the friend you're waiting for is an Outside Cat Friend.
Unless you have already agreed with your friend(s) that it's okay to ghost each other for extensive periods, spontaneously dropping out of contact with someone you've convinced is a good friend to you is really shitty and makes you a shitty friend.
"But I don't have the energy to reach out." Tell them.
"I have a lot going on and don't have time to talk." FUCKING TELL THEM.
"I haven't had anything to talk about." THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR.
"I've been too anxious to reach out." SAY THAT. JUST SAY THAT.
"I need a break from social contact for a while, so I don't wanna talk at all really." SAY THAT BEFORE YOU JUST DROP OFF THE END OF THE EARTH.
I've been the Reaching-Out Friend for most of my life, and in the past 5-10 years especially, I haven't been finding a whole lot of strength left to keep tending abandoned gardens that are thriving in name only. I've gotten fed up with self-professed friends that say they love me or view me as a sibling, but ultimately prove themselves to be bystanders when it's my turn to need someone to lean on and help me look after the garden.
Yes, there are absolutely friends you can have that can go years without hearing from you and still pick up where you left off when you do meet up again. They're awesome and worth keeping just as much as any other friends are.
There are also those friends that silently grieve your absence, that reach out to no avail, and wind up leaving the garden to die entirely after salting the soil with their own tears. Those are the friends that you've taken too much from without giving enough of yourself in return, and you've used them up and thrown them away without realizing you've treated someone that cared about you like a tool.
"I'm not the kind of friend that reaches out first."
That's your choice. No matter how you dress it up, when you decide it's time to neglect a friend, you're choosing to neglect them if they aren't prepared for what to expect from a friendship with you. You have the right to do that whenever you want to, but you cannot expect a warm reception with every person you do it to every time you do it. You cannot anticipate full amnesty in advance without full disclosure in advance.
If you're currently thinking of someone you've left sitting on read for a long time right now? It might be time to break your pattern and reach out for once.
Fall together, not apart.
#friendship#relationships#social media#dysfunctional relationships#words from an unlovable person#fake friends#rant#long post#don't send me contrived motivational dms#they do not help me and just make me angrier about how alone i am#basic kindness and companionship are too much to ask for. i've learned that the hard way#it's too late for me#so go reach out to the people you have before they're gone#i'm already consigned to isolation and loneliness#i've tried changing myself in every way i can possibly manage to keep the love and approval of the people i cared for most#they left me anyway. even family.#i am not a lovable person#and if anyone is reading these notes no. you are not the exception.#you cannot love me. it isn't possible. nobody can#i've fought for my entire life in the name of protecting the people i love#and i'm still alone#don't waste the effort on me#i've tried too hard for too long to make friends and find a community#those aren't things that i'm allowed to have#so i don't try anymore#nobody wants me#nobody ever did#the first words i ever heard as a baby that i can remember were “i hate you” from my sister#there ARE people in this world that die alone and miserable#i am going to end up one of them
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Autism is honestly the best thing this world gave me, but also I fucking hate it and please make it go away.
#like its so good#But also just fuck off please#I’m trynna live my life here and you’re making in unreasonably difficult#I just don’t see your point mate#you just make me find it hard to socialize and make friends and learn about stuff that’s not in my interest FoR fUn???#i mean cmon#leave me alone#BUT IT NEVER DOES#ITS ALWAYS THERE#LIKE DAMN MATE YOU CAN TAKE 5#ACTUALLY PLEASE TAKE 5#actually autistic#autism#relatable#autistic problems#autistic feels#i’m autistic#autistic experiences#love/hate relationship
53 notes
·
View notes
Text
Reposting this from a friend bc I think it is VERY important to know of this, and for immigrants, and other possible victims of the ICE Raids happening right now
Here’s to also a very huge edit, from the list of very helpful people who have been reblogging and providing more info.
I’m not as well informed but I will be relaying the information and tagging each person who added onto this post:
@onthedriftinthetardis -
The phone number in the first photo is ONLY for Orange County, California!
Look up your local ACLU affiliate here
@6feetunderwater -
It always makes me nervous to see a reporting phone number passed around without any links to verify it, so the number in the first pic can be found on the site for the Orange County Rapid Response Network, which is "an interconnected system of non-profit and grassroots organizations, civil rights attorneys, law school clinics, and individuals working together to respond to dehumanizing immigration enforcement activities and policies in Orange County"
@geekerypeekery -
The second warrant is not fake, but is an administrative rather than judicial warrant, and has no constitutional authority to bypass Fourth Amendment protections - in other words, it does not entitle the bearer to enter and search your home. It simply authorizes agents of the issuing department to contact you. Always ask to see the warrant before opening your door!
In addition to the ACLU links, try contacting the National Immigration Law Center https://www.nilc.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/Warrants-Subpoenas-Facts.pdf
@american-anger -
The phone number listed here is specific to Orange County in California, but you can look up other California counties here:
CALIFORNIA RAPID RESPONSE NETWORKS
@beaniebaneenie -
Unpleasant reminder: within 100 miles of the border (which is home to 200 million people and virtually all major cities in the US), ICE does not need a warrant to enter your home, your car, to search anything, or even to arrest you.
You are not automatically safe just because they don't have a real warrant.
The best and safest thing you can do is learn to have escape routes- quick ways to get out of the house or area you're in if you find out ICE or CBP are around. Those of us who do have documentation? Time for us to step the fuck up.
Film any interaction. Every interaction. If you're able, step into the conversation and be a Karen/Kyle- weaponize your privilege for Good. If you get asked about people? Use positive but vague statements so you a) cannot be caught in a lie, and b) do not give any information away.
"I don't know them that well, but I don't tend to socialize much. They seem great to me."
"I can't remember the last time I saw them."
"Maybe they speak another language, I can't remember details. But I picked up Duolingo during the pandemic and tons of other people did too."
"I'm not sure."
"I'm sorry, I can't help you."
Even if you're somewhere the 100-mile Exception doesn't apply and a warrant is in fact needed? I don't expect ICE and CBP to play by the rules for long, if at all. I fully expect this to get ugly, and fast.
Cheeto has already declared an emergency of national security at the border, and is mobilizing the military to have jurisdiction over a huge swath of the country. It's essentially tantamount to martial law. And it's only been four days.
Gear up for a long, hard fight. This is gonna be a marathon, not a sprint.
— I am leaving all of this as an edit because on the off chance someone does find the posts that have these people specifically reblogging, I don’t want it to be too late. So I’m comprising it all here
Here are a few other people’s reblogs I thought were important:
Thank you @onthedriftinthetardis @6feetunderwater @geekerypeekery @american-anger @beaniebaneenie @bunnychiffon @dubiouslynamed @trisockatops @witchy-disaster for contributing and helping me make this a more well-informed post. Thank you so much
#this is from another friend who’s in Cali rn#but reblogging this could be beneficial#support#boost!#trump#donald trump#politics#ice raids#immigration#immigrants#immigration enforcement#news#california#long post
17K notes
·
View notes
Text
Lord give me energy today eueueue
#dora daily#sm things piling up but my brain says NO#I can’t even do basic things 😭#it’s genuinely so hard to talk to others#aaaaaaah#the reason is bc I’ve forced myself into contentment with the prospect of being alone cause there’s just so much I can do that would bring#me joy in solitude but#that’s what I’ve always been doing part of the reason I talk a lot is bc that’s how I am in my head#like things firing at 100miles per second bc that’s how I used to keep myself entertained when I was younger#when everyone would have buddies and I wouldn’t#and it works now bc everyone takes ten business days to reply that it’s completely made me genuinely grossed out of social interaction#but I can’t live in La La land forever#pls if only kaveh existed I wouldn’t need another means of socialisation eueeuue#everyone is so impossible to understand; coming from a girl who has always been called utterly INSANE for how hard she hyper focuses on#small cues and signals and detecting discomfort and whatnot. I turn my brain off for one second and yet again the same shit happens it’s so#unfair that everyone can be relaxed and I ought to be on high alert 24/7#I also find it hilarious and pathetic when people pretend to be people smart but they’re really not … it’s genuinely embarrassing#like bitch when you get to my level then we will talk istg …#Istg if this is the autism thing everyone’s been telling me im screwed cause#I don’t want yet another issue#but it’d make sense like how people seem to draw away despite there being nothing wrong with me#how people tend to agree with everything someone else says but the moment I do it it’s heinous#how I have physically had to learn social cues and trial and error#with the errors altering my brain chemistry#that unwavering sense of justice that makes me so very uncomfortable if not fulfilled that I shut up about so I can actually hold down#friends. God knows how every interaction I have with a person is so orchestrated so almost artificial and ‘yes-man’ core that I don’t even#believe said person likes ME bc idek who I am and bc if I don’t agree w#everything no matter how many times someone says I won’t get mad …. trust me they do they’re all liars and manipulators even if they don’t#intend to#the scary fascinations I’ve had when younger
0 notes
Text
I firmly believe that Kabru is autistic but masks so hard that he’s convinced himself and (almost) everyone around him that he’s neurotypical.
That man’s special interest is people and how they work, but he just thinks it’s him Being So Good At Socializing — like he doesn’t spend 95% of his time people watching and adjusting his personality in response to the traits he witnesses and obsessing over the intricacies of human interaction while mapping an ever growing relationship chart in his head. For fun. He even admits it in the manga!
Like, look at him!!!
It’s such a shame that — because he’s the narrative foil to Laios and his interest is generally considered more “socially acceptable” in both their world and our own — more people don’t realize this about him. He’s constantly misinterpreted as a horribly manipulative person who only acts the way he does to use the people around him, when that’s explicitly shown to not be the case at all. Kabru is naturally empathetic and is almost always thinking about other people, regardless of whether or not they’re right there with him or a thousand miles away.
I mean, his most defining motivation is his desire to do everything he can to avoid another tragedy like the one at Utaya. Someone who doesn’t care wouldn’t have a goal like that, and they most certainly wouldn’t go about it the way he does. He’s constantly working to help people who can help everyone else and tries so hard to make sure that anyone who seems like a threat is actually someone he needs to worry about before doing anything about it. His supposed aversion to Laios is only because of the ridiculous trolley problem he’s set up in his own head.
Outside of that, he (rather justifiably) hates monsters but is desperate to understand Laios’ love for them and his apparently most selfish goal in getting close to the guy was literally just to become friends with him.
When he’s interacting with the canaries and they imply that they’re going to take him and all of his friends to the West, his first thought is of Rin and how much she’d hate to be stuck in the place that gave her so many bad memories.
He helps Kuro learn Common when Mickbell is asleep and firmly looks forward to the day that the half-foot and Kuro can communicate properly so that their relationship can get properly started without any miscommunication.
And he understands Mithrun with only a handful of weeks AT BEST interacting with him, getting enraged when the elf seems to give up and immediately trying to help him find a new motivation for life.
I’m excited just thinking about the day that Kabru starts unmasking more and more around his friends — both new and old — because if being with my current friend group has taught me anything, it’s that hanging out with anyone so unabashedly themselves is bound to make you more comfortable with yourself too. It’s part of the reason why I like Labru so much! There’s something nice about imagining them hanging out in the throne room or laying in the grass outside and talking for hours on end about their special interests. They might not strictly understand what the other finds so fascinating about monsters or people, but they can grasp that shared feeling of love.
They probably influence each other in really good ways too, with Kabru helping Laios figure out what people are thinking even when it doesn’t make sense or Laios helping Kabru understand that not everyone and everything needs to be analyzed a thousand times over. They both get to learn that there are people like them and people who will love them without them ever having to change a thing about themselves. They deserve to know that they’re fine the way they are.
#I have so many more thoughts about these two#like how Laios is actually the one who couldn’t really care about people outside of his immediate friends and family#that his love is the one that would burn down the world if it meant the people he cared about got to be as safe and happy as they should be#always as themselves#never as the corrupted versions of them in their nightmares or by the winged lions distortions#which is how Kabru would learn to be more selfish and needy#encouraged to act on his own desires and help other people at the same time#these two have ruined me#especially Kabru#because I’m predictable and my other two favorite characters are Tachihara Michizou and Nara Shikamaru#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#dungeon meshi kabru#kabru of utaya#dungeon meshi laios#laios touden#dungeon meshi rin#rinsha fana#dungeon meshi mickbell#mickbell#dungeon meshi kuro#kuro#dungeon meshi mithrun#mithrun#labru
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
stuck. [tsukishima kei x f!reader]
>>Tsukishima is the kind of best friend that makes you want to leave him, but you just can't bring yourself to.
or
You end up confessing in the middle of a fight and he fucks you to show you how much he really cares.<<
______________________________
tags: smut, fluff, angst, best friends to lovers, oral sex (f receiving), penetrative sex, fingering, rough sex, alcohol/drinking, college au, tsukishima kei is a dick, drunk sex, unprotected sex (dont do that), creampie, dom/sub undertones
a/n: ahahahaha this was my first hq work posted on ao3, and it is everything Mean Best Friend Tsukishima Kei that i needed. i hope you enjoy!
[feel free to buy me a cup of coffee!]
------------------
“Okay, I’m done! How do I look?”
“You look like shit.”
You sigh, trying not to let him get to you.
Tsukki’s always been this way - dismissive, nonchalant, indifferent. Through middle school, he’d been sarcastic. He’d been snarky and brutally honest. And in high school, he’d only gotten worse.
Anyone else in your position might have left him already. People you’d known in school had told you to find someone else, a better friend. Best friends don’t treat each other the way Tsukishima treats you , they’d said. His teammates had been in the habit of scolding him whenever he’d go too far, whenever he’d push your buttons a little too hard. The only one who could see your side had been Yamaguchi, and even he’d had his reservations at times.
But other people don’t know Tsukishima Kei. They know the Tsukki that would refuse to share his notes with you after you’d been out sick. The Tsukki that would steal parts of your lunch and hold it high above your head, far out of your reach, and call you mean names with a cruel smirk. The Tsukki that would often leave you behind after school and head home without you, leaving you to text him and wonder where he’d gone.
They don’t know that the same person would show up at your house with his notes, walking you through calculus and poetry lessons himself because he knows you learn better with a teacher. And, even though you never called him out for it, he would show up the day you’d been out sick, too, just to check on you. Just to watch movies in bed with you, waving off your concerns about him getting sick. He hated being sick, but he would ignore your complaints and force you to relax - because you’d only ever get sick when you overworked yourself, which meant he hadn’t been watching over you closely enough.
They don’t know that Tsukki would secretly swap your lunch out for his own - better, homemade food that wasn’t the cafeteria slop you were often forced to buy because your parents weren’t home a lot. He would watch you push the food around on your tray while you’d laugh at something Hinata had said, identifying at least 3 things you were allergic to on that plate. So he would reach for it, leaving his own (allergen-free, thanks to Akiteru) lunch open for retaliation while he’d use his height as a way to take out his frustrations on you - his irritation that you never seemed to put yourself first, choosing starvation over just simply asking your parents for money before they go out of town.
And the times he’d leave you behind - well, half the time, it had been an accident. It was impossible to remember your packed schedule, all your clubs and student council meetings lumping into a vague ‘ Y/n’s busy ’ block of time in his mind. The other half of the time, it was because he needed to be alone. It’s not that he’s an asshole and loves to make you suffer - in fact, he would often call you later the same night, apologizing in his own, special Tsukishima Kei way and explaining himself. He gets overwhelmed easily, overstimulated by too many people, too many responsibilities, too many social expectations. So he would disappear as soon as he was allowed, needing to be alone with himself and no one else.
So, the people in your life had known a different version of Tsukishima than you do. Where they’d seen a bully, cold and unrelenting even for his best friend, you’d known nothing more than an introvert, expressing his care in a way that was unrecognizable to anyone but you.
Care that had carried over into college, the last three years filled with a Tsukishima Kei that even you hadn’t expected. A version of him that walks you from the library to your dorm at night, despite his increasingly hectic volleyball schedule. A Tsukishima who calls you in the morning on his walk to class to make sure you haven’t overslept, because - even if the calls consist of nothing but your crabby morning disposition, berating him for pulling you from your slumber - he knows you’ll thank him later, as you often do.
A Tsukishima who lets you drag him to parties, even though he hates them to his very core. He lets you tug him along to your dorm, lets you force him to sit through the hour-long ordeal of choosing your outfit. Lets you spin in front of him when you’re done, clearly pleased with yourself, and ask him how you look.
Lets you throw a pillow at his face when he tells you that you look like shit, even if he wholeheartedly believes otherwise.
“Tsukki, can’t you say one nice thing to me? For once?”
He scoffs when you put your hands on your hips, turning his gaze back to his phone as he lounges on your bed like it’s his own. It might as well be, with the amount of time he spends in this room.
“That would require you to have something worth being nice about, wouldn’t it?” He smiles mockingly when he catches the irritated twitch of your eyebrow.
“You’re a dick.”
“Nothing new about that.” Tsukishima watches as you turn back to your closet with a huff, taking the time to look you over appreciatively. No , he thinks, his eyes lingering on the curve of your breasts and the way your dress hugs your hips, the material tight but soft. His hand itches with the urge to touch it, to find out for himself. It’s not that you have nothing. It’s that you have too much.
He sighs, sitting up, and runs his fingers through his hair.
You have too much, and it’s fucking annoying.
His eyes flick to you again, his own irritation growing. You’d always been too good. Too perfect, too overwhelming. He’d hated falling in love. It had sucked. High school had sucked . Having you cling to him every day and finding himself clinging right back. Not understanding these complicated feelings he has - ones that want nothing more than to hold you in his arms, against others that would tell him to push you away with his sharp tongue, to protect himself from this terrifying feeling.
And now that he’s accepted it - it had only taken him the entirety of high school and at least a year of college - he almost hates it more. Being so close to you and somehow still feeling like he can’t breathe because it’s not nearly close enough.
So he stands, shoving his phone in the pocket of his jeans, and stares you down when you finally turn back to him.
“Can we go? The sooner we get to this stupid thing, the sooner I can go home.” He thinks he sees a flicker of hurt flash across your eyes, but that can’t be it. He’s said worse things before. You always bounce back, a retort on the tip of your tongue for everything he could throw at you. You always match him, blow for blow.
So why, then, can he see your jaw clenching as you turn away from him? Why does he feel like you’re pulling your jacket off the rack with more force than usual? Why are you leaving without responding?
What the fuck ?
-
Fuck Tsukishima Kei .
It’s the only thought in your mind as you down the shot, wincing as the alcohol slides down your throat. You’d lost count of the drinks you’ve had about an hour ago, when the thought had been something more like ‘ Fuck Tsukishima Kei. Stupid fucking idiot. Never thinks before he speaks ’.
Clearly, you’d mellowed out a little, but the anger is still there, simmering in your chest and threatening to rise every time he gets close to you.
The walk to the frat had been silent, but he hadn’t mentioned anything about your mood, only scrolling through his phone and occasionally glancing over at you. You’d felt the irritation crawling under your skin with every pass of his eyes over you, but you hadn’t returned any of his gazes, only looking forward to getting to the party and being with other people.
But he hadn’t let you wander off so easily, his tall form following close behind as you’d tried to find some of your friends from class. You can tell he’s been trying to silently check on you, like he always does when he knows he���s bothered you.
He’d brought you drinks, only smiling emptily when you’d glared up at him. It shouldn’t have made your heart skip that he’d done nothing more than offered you a drink, tapping his own red solo cup against yours and matching you shot for shot. It shouldn’t affect you when he does the bare minimum.
He’d danced close to you, one hand on your waist and his warm chest pressed firmly against your back. You’d hated it - feeling so safe in the arms of someone who had derived pleasure from picking on you your whole lives. And even if that’s not true - even if you only take into account all the ways that he’d taken care of you, celebrating all your accomplishments with you and holding you while you’d cried about your failures - you still shouldn’t be feeling that familiar tug of nerves in your stomach when he presses his hips against your ass, slipping his fingers through yours and pulling you close.
And when that hadn’t worked - when you’d held your ground and managed to cling to your anger from earlier - he’d even tried to talk to you about it. That isn’t normal for him by any means, but you could see the confusion in his eyes when he’d leaned down to be heard over the music, mumbling his question against the shell of your ear.
“Are we okay ?”
It had taken everything in you to resist him, to resist the pull that is Tsukishima Kei. The same pull that had kept you next to him all these years, through all the teasing and the poking. The pull that kept reminding you that he’s just bad at expressing his feelings. He’s just bad at being nice. He’s just bad at holding his tongue.
But that doesn’t mean you have to sit and take it every time.
So you’d only smacked his hand away and glared when he’d cupped the side of your face, trying to get you to look at him. Stomping over to the bar, you had asked the frat boy for a shot of something random.
After downing it, you try not to look back but fail miserably - you might be pissed, but you’ve never been immune to him. You probably never would be.
Glancing back, you can see his blond head in the sea of people. He’s trying to make his way to the bar, but his head is whipping to the side at the sound of something. A tall guy - you recognize it’s someone from his team - appears at his side, clapping his shoulder, and you can only assume he’d heard his name being called.
They start talking, Tsukki seeming distracted but drunk enough to at least pretend he’s interested in the conversation. You look away just as he’s turning his head back to you - you won’t be caught looking his way again tonight.
Luckily, there’s someone stepping up beside you, catching your attention with their bright smile.
“Y/n?!”
You blink, startled by the recognition. But when you finally see who it is, you can’t help but beam.
“Oh my God, Bokuto?!” You leap toward him, wrapping your arms around the man’s neck and dragging him into a hug. You feel him laugh against you, his arms sliding around your waist and pulling you in tight. When you step away, he keeps you close, hand on your hips.
“What are you doing here?! You don’t go here, do you?”
The man shakes his head, grinning down at you and pointing over his shoulder.
“Nah, I’m just visiting a few friends over the weekend.”
You glance past him, seeing a group of boys that seem like they could be familiar to you, but you can never tell - Bokuto Koutarou is friends with everyone.
When you look back, you catch his eyes wandering down the length of your body, his gaze snapping up to yours when you clear your throat. He has the decency to look ashamed.
“Sorry, Y/n - You’ve just, uh… grown up a lot since high school.”
You flush deeply, something that makes him grin when he catches it.
At least someone thinks I look good tonight .
You’re smiling flirtily up at him, feeling confident enough to drag this conversation out. He seems to notice, an interested glimmer in his eye. But then he’s glancing over your shoulder, and his eyebrows are raising in surprise.
A hand wraps around your bicep, much tighter than necessary in your opinion. You barely have time to spot the blond hair in your peripheral vision before you’re being dragged away. You can only wave at Bokuto, who looks a little disappointed but mostly just amused.
Tsukishima only lets you go when you’re outside, his hand dropping from your skin like you’ve burned him. You whip around to face him, more than ready to yell at him on the front lawn of this frat house. But he’s already walking away, in the direction of your dorm.
“Dude, what the hell? You didn’t even say hi to him - he’s one of your closest friends!” You stalk after him, determined to figure out what could possibly be going through his mind. But he won’t answer you, just shaking his head and mumbling something that sounds vaguely like ‘exactly ’ as he makes his way down the street.
You scoff, turning back to the frat. He’s out of his mind if he thinks you’re just going to follow him home quietly.
You start to head back to the party, but you barely make it five steps before his fingers are closing around your wrist and tugging you back to him. When you look up, enraged at his entitlement, you see that he’s incensed, staring down at you with wild eyes. He looks pissed, which he has no reason to be. But there’s something else there, something that’s contributing to this almost panicked anger sitting just below the surface.
“Tsukishima, what do you want?”
He bristles at the use of his full name, golden eyes narrowing as he stares down at you.
“You’re going home.” He punctures every word with barely concealed irritation, finally turning and dragging you back down the street. You don’t say anything this time, feeling that previously mellowed out anger returning full force as you stare at the back of his head.
The walk back is just as silent as the walk to the party had been, but this time you feel ready to explode. You’d been annoyed before, bothered and hurt by his words and the way he treats you.
Now you’re just ready to pick a fight. Which means you’ll probably say something you’ll regret if you don’t get away from him soon and take some time to calm the hell down.
When you get to your door, you’ve already got your keys out. He’d let go of you in the elevator, finally realizing that he’d been gripping you way too hard. You might just be able to get inside without him following.
But the second you unlock the door and slip inside, not a word said to the blond as you try to shut the door behind you, his hand is slamming down on the wood. He stops your attempt, staring down at you with annoyance.
“You’re joking, right?” And then he’s pushing into your room with an angry sigh, letting the door swing shut behind him. You only step back, crossing your arms over your chest as you look him over.
“What do you want?”
“What do I wa- What is your problem tonight ?” He squints down at you, eyebrows furrowed. When you only raise yours, his jaw is clenching. “Why the fuck are you so mad at me?”
“Because-” You stop yourself, taking a deep breath in order to maintain some semblance of control. “Because you’re an asshole, Tsukishima-”
“Stop fucking calling me that, Y/n-”
“-and maybe I’m just not in the mood for your shit tonight!” You yell over him, clenching your fists against your body. You need him to go. You cannot let him see you cry.
“I’m always an asshole! How is tonight any different-” He’s taken a step further into the small bedroom, and you take a step back, feeling overwhelmed. You’re immensely glad you don’t have a roommate, so they don’t have to deal with the mess that is your friendship with Tsukki.
“Tonight isn’t any different, you dick. It’s the same as it always is. I’m just tired of it tonight.” You feel yourself growing angrier when he just laughs, throwing you a mocking smile as he paces the room. He’s definitely drunk.
“Oh, excuse me, I didn’t realize I needed to account for Little Miss Y/n’s fucking mood swings whenever I open my mouth-”
“What the fuck did you just sa-”
“I just didn’t take you for someone who’s sensitive-”
“Well, maybe I am, you fucking asshole! ”
You’re definitely drunk, too.
Tsukishima stops short, taking you in. He can’t hide the shock on his face when he sees you - the way your hands are shaking at your sides, the quiver of your lip as you try your best to stand up to him. You’re trying so hard not to cry, he can tell.
Wow, I really am an asshole.
“Y/n… I-”
“Did you really think I would still want to go to that party once you’d made it clear how much you didn’t want to go? That you think it’s stupid to hang out with your best friend on a Friday night doing something she wants to do - because your idea of a good time is so different from mine that you would try make me feel like a fucking idiot for it?”
Tsukishima’s starting to panic - had he made you feel that way? He’d just been talking. He hadn’t even been thinking about how it would make you feel - he’d thought nothing could hurt you, that your friendship is guaranteed and that having you next to him is a given.
Now he feels like he’s losing you.
“Maybe, once in a fucking while , it wouldn’t hurt you too much to tell a girl she’s pretty when she’s just spent an hour trying to look good for you.”
The frustration on Tsukishima’s face drops, and he’s left staring emptily at you.
That’s what this is about?
He stares for a while, his eyes just flicking back and forth between yours as he thinks of how to take that. It makes you nervous. You’d said too much.
“Fuck this.”
You blink, staring up at him in disbelief. What is that supposed to mean?
“What do you- mmh -”
Tsukishima had crossed the room in just two steps, taking your face in his hands while you’d been preparing to yell at him again. And then he’d smashed his lips to yours.
Your heart jumps into your throat, and you let out a noise of shock, muffled against his mouth. Your eyes remain wide open, flitting in a panic over his features as you feel his lips move against yours. His brow is furrowing behind his glasses, and you’re realizing that you still haven’t kissed him back. You push against his lips experimentally, watching that wrinkle between his eyes all but disappear when he feels it, and you think it looks a lot like relief.
He’s nervous.
Your body moves of its own accord, hands sliding up his chest to grip at his shirt, and your eyes slide closed when you feel one of his hands fall to your waist. He nudges you backward, and you feel the hard surface of your closet door against your back.
Tsukishima slides his tongue against your bottom lip, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth when he feels you inhale sharply in response. He takes advantage of your surprise, pushing past your lips and brushing his tongue against yours. When you slide your hands up and around his neck, tugging at the hair there, he groans and leans down.
Planting a hand on the door behind you, he angles his head, slotting his lips against yours. He presses his hips into you, and you can feel how hard he’s getting. You sigh into his mouth at the feeling, smiling when his body reacts to the sound, his cock hardening against your thigh.
Tsukishima Kei might be impossible to read sometimes, but he never could hide from you.
He drops his mouth to your neck, latching onto a spot under your ear and using his other arm to pull you flush against him. The sounds you’re making are clear now, soft gasps and whimpers echoing in your tiny dorm room.
“So stupid… ”
You barely hear him, too busy wondering why it had taken so long to feel his lips on your skin.
“The only person in the world that can see right through me, and you were stupid enough to believe what I said. ” He mumbles it into your ear, taking your earlobe between his teeth and sighing when you moan against him.
“You’re so mean…” Your breath catches in your throat when you feel his hand drop to your leg, pulling the fabric of your dress up slightly. He grips at the back of your bare thigh, brushing against your panties and kneading into the plush skin just below your ass.
“What were you gonna do, Y/n, go home with Bokuto?” Tsukishima all but growls the question against your neck, dragging your thigh up and wrapping your leg around his hip. He feels your dress slide up, feels your warmth against his jeans. He’s desperate to get out of them.
“Y-You called me ugly-”
“I never said that.” Yes he had. He knows he had. He just hadn’t realized you would take it to heart. Now he hates himself for even saying it. For pretending you aren’t the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen.
“Bo said I looked good… Figured I might as well go for someone who’s actually attracted to me…” You whimper when Tsukishima presses his erection against you, your thin panties useless against the rough fabric of his jeans.
“Does it feel like I’m not attracted to you?”
You breathe out a laugh, clinging to his biceps as he sucks another bruise into your skin.
“How was I supposed to know, you dumbass? You only ever say mean things, and I thought I could get over you by-”
“By what?” He’s getting irritated again at the thought of what could have happened tonight if he hadn’t brought you home. If he’d left you alone, like his brain was telling him to. If he’d given you space and just texted you in the morning.
“You thought you could just fuck some other guy and get over me?” He lifts his head, grinning cruelly when you look up at him, your lip trembling. “Because I didn’t call you pretty tonight? Because you were tired of me being mean all the time?”
You nod, a gasp leaving you when he wraps an arm around your waist and hoists you up so you’re eye-level, slamming you back against the closet door and pinning you there with his hips. Your dress is bunched up around your stomach now, leaving Tsukishima with a perfect view of the wet spot on your panties when he glances down. His grin widens, an evil glint shining behind his glasses.
“But it seems like you like it when I say mean things, Y/n.”
You whine in protest, growing louder when you feel him rut involuntarily against you at the sound.
“This is different, Tsukki-”
“Is it?” He’s distracted when he asks, too busy steadying you in his arms so he can lift you up and away from the closet. Making his way to your bed, he drops you unceremoniously on the mattress, smiling when you yelp. He removes his glasses and leaves them on your bedside table, dropping to his knees at the edge of the bed and wrapping his arms around your thighs so he can drag you toward him.
You sit up, taking his face in your hands and pressing your lips urgently to his - even on his knees, he’s tall enough to be eye-level with you. You feel his fingers, long and calloused, drift up your thighs and hook into your panties while he nips almost affectionately at your bottom lip.
“Tsukki… ” You whisper against his mouth, but he’s quick to shake his head, mumbling back to you.
“Not that. ”
You’re a little surprised - you never really call him by his first name. He’d found it uncomfortable the one time you’d tried it as a joke. But if he’s asking, then-
“Kei .” His pulse quickens under your fingertips when you murmur against his lips, his kiss becoming more full, and you realize just how much he likes it.
You pull away and press kisses to his face, peppering them across his nose and cheeks. It’s a moment that’s far softer than either of you had had before, one that has Tsukishima’s heart beating a little too hard in his chest.
God, he hates being in love.
He pulls away from you, planting one hand on your chest and shoving you away from him. You fall back onto your elbows with a noise of surprise, bouncing lightly on the mattress. Tsukishima only reaches for your panties again, tugging them down and smiling to himself when you lift your hips to help him.
He throws them somewhere over his shoulder, refusing to break his attention. Planting his hands on each of your knees, he pries your knees open slowly, glancing up at your face for any signs of discomfort. When he finds none, his gaze flicks back down to what’s in front of him.
And then his breath is cutting short at the sight of you lying bare in front of him. You’re glistening, even in this dark room, and his cock is suddenly unbearably hard.
He’d been thinking about this moment for far longer than he’d ever care to admit.
“Well, isn’t this just the prettiest little pussy I’ve ever seen?”
You throw your head back at his words, moaning loudly.
“Oh, shut up.” You know Tsukki’s slept with his fair share of girls since you’d started college - being a popular volleyball player has its benefits. You’d done the same, hoping to squash down that jealousy in your own, twisted way. To hear him praising you like this - like you’d always wanted - has you clenching and squirming from the desire coursing through your veins.
“First you get mad because I’m too mean, and now you’re mad because I’m being nice?” He tilts his head, his voice mocking. “You really need to make up your mind.”
And then, before you can let out some kind of snarky quip, he’s dipping his head and dragging his tongue over your slit in one long stripe.
You gasp loudly and moan out his name, falling back onto the mattress as your hands fly to his head. You bury your fingers in his hair, tightening your grip when he does it again, licking through your folds before latching onto your clit, pulling the nub gently into his mouth.
He moans loudly against you when you mewl and pull his hair. The vibration on your clit makes you squirm, and you’re involuntarily rutting your hips against his face. He only laughs against you, his breath tickling your skin, and wraps an arm over your hips to hold you steady on the bed.
He pulls his mouth off of you, and you lift your head to look at him in annoyance. He smirks, holding eye contact while he brings his other hand to your folds. When he runs his fingers through them, stopping briefly to circle your clit, you whimper. And when he drops his middle finger to your entrance, nudging gently at it in question, you bite your lip and nod furiously, just wanting him to touch you already-
“Oh my- Kei-” Your head falls back when he slides his finger in and drops his mouth to your clit to suck on it. He sets his pace with his finger, thrusting into you and curling gently up toward himself, repeating the process until he can tell by your squirming hips that you’re starting to feel something.
And then he’s pushing another finger past your entrance, his cock twitching when you moan at the stretch. He’s been painfully hard for a while now, and all he wants is to be inside you of already. He doesn’t realize you’re feeling just as impatient, only noticing when your hands drop to his shoulders, tugging on his shirt.
“Kei …” You pout down at him, your eyelids fluttering when he thrusts his fingers into you again. His fingertips are brushing against a spot you’ve never been able to reach yourself, his fingers much longer than yours. You think you might become addicted to his hands soon. But you only pull again on his shirt with a whine, hoping he’ll get the message.
Luckily, he does, because he’s pulling away to rip his shirt impatiently off his back, wiping his mouth with it before throwing it to the floor. He unzips his jeans as he makes his way up to the bed, pausing to scoop you up into his arms and tossing you closer to your pillows so he can climb on top of you.
When he pushes his mouth to yours, you’re moaning. He tastes like you, something he’s apparently proud of, because he’s just smiling against you and shoving his tongue past your lips. He drops his mouth to your neck again as he fumbles with his jeans.
“You taste so good, you know that?” He latches onto your skin, sucking harshly. “So much better than I’d imagined.” He pushes his pants just past his thighs, growing impatient. You gasp quietly when his cock brushes against you, the sound changing to a moan when Tsukishima runs it through your folds, sliding against you.
He lifts his head to look at you, his eyes searching yours in a moment of astounding clarity given the insanity of this whole night.
“You sure?”
Your heart jumps when he asks. He’s got the tip of his cock nudging against your entrance, clearly holding himself back. But the way he’s looking at you makes you realize he wants this to be done right - after all, this had started with the two of you fighting. He doesn’t want you to regret this later and be even more upset with him.
He doesn’t want to lose you.
The idea that that’s what been hiding behind Tsukki’s eyes tonight - that vague panic that you couldn’t put your finger on - makes your heart sing and your stomach swoop with butterflies. You can only nod, cupping his face and bringing him down to your lips. His kiss is gentle and full of something that makes your nerves worse, something that makes you feel more than sure.
“I want this more than anything.”
Tsukishima’s heart skips, and he’s swearing softly against your lips. He hovers over you, keeping his mouth on yours as he presses his thumb against the head of his cock, guiding it past your entrance.
You gasp together as he pushes slowly into you, a moan pulled from your throat when he bottoms out and breathes out your name. The fog in your head - a mixture of alcohol, arousal, and nerves at the realization that you’re having sex with your best friend - worsens considerably when he drops his head to your neck, making an admission against your ear.
I’ve wanted this for so long …”
You whimper, curling your fingers into his hair and holding him close as he pulls out slowly just to slide into you again. You moan at the slow stretch, feeling his shaky breath against your ear.
“I didn’t mean to hurt you…” Tsukishima doesn’t know why he’s choosing now to have this conversation, when you very well can just talk about it after. But there’s a strand of fear twisting around the butterflies in the pit of his stomach, and his mouth is moving without his permission. He needs you to understand what this means to him.
“I didn’t know it would hurt you… I didn’t mean it…” His hips are still slow, moving languidly against yours. He’d expected this to be rough - sex is only ever rough for him - but he needs to concentrate on what he’s saying. And you feel so good like this, so warm and tight around him.
You’re having the same problem, your head completely empty as you feel him push into you inch by inch instead of all at once. You can barely hear him, your ears ringing and your skin overheating while you try to process that this is actually happening - that you finally have Tsukishima Kei the way that you’d always dreamed about.
“I’m sorry… I’m sorry, Y/n.”
Your heart stutters when you realize what he’s been saying. Even with everything else going on right now - even as his hips are picking up the pace, even with his breath shuddering against your skin as he moans quietly in your ear - he’s distracted, trying to apologize. Trying to make things right between you.
“It’s okay…” You whisper forgiveness into his hair, but you feel him shake his head, his grip on your hips tightening.
“It’s not. I shouldn’t hurt you. Not you…” He gasps quietly into your neck, his hips stuttering momentarily before he returns to his previous speed. “S-Sorry… You feel really good… Trying to focus.”
You flush, clenching around him and pulling him closer when he groans. You think about what he’s saying. ‘ Not you ’?
You’re about to ask what he means, but he’s mumbling another admission against your skin, this one much more intense than the last.
“I love you, Y/n… So fucking in love, it hurts…”
You inhale sharply, your heart stopping in your chest. But then there’s a moan ripping from your throat, because he’s hitting a spot in you that you didn’t even know existed, the tip of his cock bumping up against something that makes the coil in the pit of your stomach twist harshly.
“I- fuck - Tsukki, I love you, too…”
Tsukishima lifts his head then, staring down at you with surprise written all over his face. You can only breathe out a laugh, moaning quietly while you giggle.
“What, you’re shocked? I just told you I almost went home with Bokuto just so I could stop thinking about you.”
His eyes darken at your words, and his hips are snapping harshly against yours. You moan in surprise, feeling your stomach flip at the way he’s looking down at you. He seems to remember now just how this night could have gone.
He sits up, knocking your hands away when you reach out for him with a whine, and pulls out of you completely. Slipping off the edge of the bed, he wraps his hands around your thighs and tugs you toward him roughly. He only smiles mockingly down at you when you slide across the mattress with a quiet yelp, pulling your hips flush against his.
When he slips into you again, the soft, caring Tsukishima is gone, replaced with the Tsukki you’ve always known. The one who has no problem running his mouth just to get to you.
“That’s it then, huh? If I hadn’t dragged you home, you’d be wrapped around another man right now?” He slams into you, watching with delight as you cry out and arch your back. He keeps this pace, his grip on your hips bordering on painful as he drives his cock into you.
“Tsukki-”
“What did I tell you? ” His tone cuts through you, yanking hard on that coil in your navel and setting off a fresh flurry of butterflies.
“I- Kei -”
“You think you can forget about me that easily? You think I would let you?”
You’re writhing under him, hands gripping your sheets tight as you gasp with each hard thrust of his hips on yours. The sight makes Tsukishima’s hips stutter, and he feels his orgasm coming on. He drops his thumb to your clit to push you closer to the edge, throwing his head back with a moan when you clench around him.
“Kei, please- feels so goo- ah- ”
“S-Shit, Y/n, I’m not gonna last… Where should I-” Tsukishima almost loses it when you claw at his hands on your hips, latching onto his wrists as you moan.
“Insi-Inside… Inside, Kei, please…” You look up at him, taking in the flush of his cheeks, the way his eyelids flutter when you clench around him. The way he bites down hard on his bottom lip and moans after a few seconds, breaking his hold on you so he can slam his hands down on the mattress on either side of you, his hair falling into his face as he pants down at you.
“Fuck -” He reaches down, brushing his thumb over your clit again. When you tighten around him this time, he’s letting out a choked gasp and your name, and you’re suddenly filled with warmth as his hips stutter, as he spills into you. He drops his head to your shoulder, his breath shaky as he thrusts into you, riding out his orgasm.
And when he’s done - when his cum is dripping out of you while you squirm, feeling full but unsatisfied - he sits up, pulling you against him again. He wraps his fingers around your wrists, smiling breathlessly when you cling to his forearms, and uses you as leverage when he draws his hips back and snaps them harshly into yours.
You cry out, feeling yourself throb the more he all but drags you down onto his cock and tries to draw your orgasm out of you. He releases your wrists, his thumb circling that little bundle of nerves while his other hand grips the back of your thigh, spreading your legs even further.
When he changes the angle of his stroke, you’re gasping, unable to handle all of the sensations he’s causing in your body. There’s too much going on, too many feelings happening, each of which is bringing you closer to the edge. You slap your hands down over your face, trying both to muffle your moans and also hide your face, feeling embarrassed that your body is reacting so strongly to everything Tsukishima does.
He only coos down at you, his tone almost insulting.
“Oh, is my baby going to come?”
You whine loudly at his words, so rude but so endearing - your stomach swoops as the coil tightens, but you nod anyway. His low chuckle reaches your ears.
“Let me see you, then.” When you don’t respond, only moaning into your hands with each thrust, he clicks his teeth at you in annoyance. “Come on, Y/n. I wanna see how pretty my best friend looks when she comes on my cock.”
Tsukishima beams when that does it, your back arching as you cry out his name. You screw your eyes shut and fumble desperately for his hands. He slips his fingers through yours, holding tight when you come, your walls fluttering around him. He fucks you through it, inhaling sharply when you become impossibly tight, and then drops down over you when you're done, pressing his lips to yours.
You let out a sob against his mouth, your limbs heavy as you try to catch your breath.
“Tsukki …” You wiggle uncomfortably, wrapping your arms around his neck and clinging to him. He laughs against your neck, pressing kisses to your skin. And then he leans up again, pressing his lips to your tiredly.
“Let me get you cleaned up.” He snickers when you whine but joins in on your soft gasp when he slides out of you, both of you sensitive. Stripping you out of the dress that’s been bunched up on your stomach this whole time, he leaves you on the bed, kicking his jeans off as he makes his way into your connected bathroom. When he returns, it’s with a wet rag and a gentle hand on your thighs.
Tsukishima scoops you into his arms when he’s done, setting you carefully against the pillows and climbing into bed with you. Your head is still empty, and you reach your arms out uselessly for him, mumbling his name. He only smiles, pulling you against his chest and kissing the side of your head.
“You okay?” When you nod sleepily against his chest, he smiles, tugging you closer. “Not too mean?”
You giggle, planting a kiss on his neck.
“I like you a little mean.”
Tsukishima snorts, shaking his head.
“I know you do. But still…” He meets your eyes, suddenly shy, his cheeks flushing. “I’ll be better from now on. Less ‘ toxic boyfriend ’ and more ‘ insufferable but still cute ’.”
You beam at his words, your heart skipping.
“Boyfriend , huh?”
He rolls his eyes, a smile tugging at his lips.
“Oh, I’m sorry - I forgot you and Bokuto were basically married.”
“Oh, right, I should probably tell him the wedding’s off-”
“You’re a dick.”
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
You need more free art.
I quit my job yesterday. Well, actually I quit my job eight weeks ago, but they finally released me yesterday for good behaviour. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do - but I do it for the wrong reasons. Working for major charities, you learn very fast that 'I want to make the world a better place' is a phrase you use to ask people for money, not to give them things. I was an ass-backwards fit for that world.
You need more free art. I need more free art. Everyone has felt the shift in our media landscape over the last ten years, away from access and towards nickel-and-diming the human experience. That lack of access is making life and culture worse for all of us, across the board. Paywalled news sites leave us less informed, attacks on the Internet Archive leave us less capable of research. Algorithmic social feeds and streaming walled gardens trap us inside smaller and smaller demographic bubbles, where we are increasingly only likely to encounter ideas that have been curated for us by marketing departments. Hasty efforts to resist AI commodification have only led to more artists locking their work away and calling for even more onerous systems of copyright law. This is not good for us.
We all need more free art.
So what am I going to do about it?
This is a question I have been asking myself for years. It's easy to sit here feeilng frustrated and thinking 'boy I hope SOMEONE does SOMETHING'. It's harder to take action in a world where I still have rent to pay. But hard doesn't mean impossible. Sometimes hard just means time-consuming, frustrating and slow. And sometimes it's worth doing something time-consuming, frustrating and slow because...I want to make the world a better place.
I'm going to do this:
1. From April 1st, I am relaunching as a freelance writer and editor.
This is the one that will (hopefully) help to pay the bills. I am a very good and experienced editor. I've worked on hollywood movies, I'm a member of the Chartered Institute of Editors and Proofreaders, I have clients who have been coming to me exclusively for more than 10 years.
Alongside bigger contract jobs, I am going to refocus on offering my services to small-press creators at a reduced rate. That means you, graphic novelists. That means you, itch and amazon writers. I want to help you develop your work, the same way I help large organisations. You can learn more about what an editor even does and what kind of pricing you can expect here.
2. I'm also going to start giving shit away. Like, constantly.
Next week I'm going to launch a new free shop. If you're unfamiliar, a free shop, giveaway shop, swap shop, etc. is an anarchist tradition of setting up a storefront where anyone can take what they like for no cost. Offline, this often means second-hand clothes, tools, furniture, food etc. Online, I am going to be giving away digital art. Copyright-free, no strings attached. It will (eventually) feature everything from print-res posters to zines, poems, tattoo flash, t-shirt designs and anything else we come up with.
Yes, I said 'we' - while this is a curated collection, it will feature work from a variety of credited and anonymous artists and activists, all of whom have agreed to give their work away to the public domain. Some of it will be practical, some of it will be political, but a lot of it will be decorative or personal. This is, in part, a response to recent difficulty I had finding somewhere that would print a one-off joke poster for a friend that featured the word 'faggot'. Enough. No middlemen - no explaining ourselves. Just print our shit and enjoy it.
I'm very, very excited about this project. I'll have more to say about it closer to the launch, but you can expect it to go live on March 27th.
2.2 I forgot to mention the ACTUAL LAUNCH GIVEAWAY
To celebrate my launch, I am going to be giving away a ton of physical prints. When I went looking for my old stock to see if it was worth setting a new (paid) storefront up, I realised I had way more old work in storage than I thought. This will be announced in its own right on Monday, but this is why I've been hinting you should go follow my Patreon.
On April 1st, I will pick 8 random patrons (from across all tiers including non-paying followers!) and mail them a bundle of assorted prints and postcards. The prize pool includes A3 and A4 posters, packs of A6 postcards, and printed minicomics that I've previously sold for up to £12 each.
You don't have to be a paying subscriber to enter - this is strictly no-purchase necessary. It is purely and entirely a celebration of the concept of GIVING ART AWAY FOR FREE.
3. PORN, YOU PERVERTS
Because I still have to pay to stay alive, I am going to be subsidising all this free art with the introduction of Fuck You Fridays. Starting from March 29th, I will drop a new 18+ short story on the last Friday of every month, over on itch.io (yes I know my page is desolate right now, don't worry I'll get there).
The first edition, Go Fuck Yourself, is about, well - telling your boss where to stick it. Julia has had it with her millionaire man-child manager, and is just about ready to let him know what she really thinks. It's a short and steamy 5k words, with a gorgeous cover illustration by @taylor-titmouse, and you can pick it up for $3 starting from March 29th.
4. ANOTHER BIG SURPRISE
I'm keeping this one under wraps for now, but April 1st will also play host to one more (FREE) launch. If you've been following me for a long time, you might remember the other significance of this date (no not April Fool's day, though that is certainly thematically relevant to this entire effort). That's all I'll say right now. Watch this space.
tl;dr: I'm sick of paywalls and career ladders. I'm literally putting my money where my mouth is. More free art for everyone and I'm not kidding around!!!
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
Congrats on Your Divorce
Wanda Maximoff x Reader
Word Count: 4.1k
Notes: Requested, fluff & smut, librarian!reader, divorced!Wanda, smut, fingering, thigh-riding, cunnilingus
Summary: You befriend Wanda, a regular at the library you work at, after learning about her divorce. The friendship becomes something more one day when you come over to help her with her sick kids. As your relationship progresses you even talk about buying a home together, which leads to a physical manifestation of how much you love each other.
An: It took me awhile because I got a little carried away. I hope I did your request justice 🙇♀️.
Masterlist
You enjoyed the mundane lifestyle that came with working at the library. There was a comfort that came with knowing that you worked in something of a community center. Being able to provide a service that for some was the highlight of their day. In this day and age having regulars at the library was a rarity, especially the adults. Kids would come after school for homework or for research purposes, but the adults were few and far between.
Technically it may have been weird that you had a favorite but you couldn’t help yourself. There was a woman named Wanda, she’d come once a week ask for a recommendation and sit there the whole day and read it.
She’d always make a comment or two on the book on her way out and it made you smile. It was good to know she appreciated your picks. Though there were other staff members she only really asked you.
When she missed one week, you found yourself discouraged. One week turned to two and so forth until it had been a month since you saw the woman.
“Y/n, it looks like your regular is back. She might need a little assistance,” one of your coworkers approaches you.
“What are you talking about?”
They give you a look that says ‘seriously’, “Ms. Recommendations, she’s in the non-fiction section looking a little worse for wear.”
You nod and make your way over to the section. There you find Wanda. Your coworker was not exaggerating. She looked so fragile as if she was just waiting for the tears to fall. She was staring at the books, but it was easy to tell that she wasn’t really reading anything.
“Looking for anything in particular,” you say softly, trying not to startle her.
She seems to snap out of her trance enough to try and answer you, “No, not today.”
It felt like she was speaking on autopilot. If it were another guest, you would’ve let her be, but this was Wanda. Perhaps it was a bit para-social but it felt like you knew her better than the average customer.
“I- I don’t mean to overstep, but are you alright?”
She lets out a tired sigh, “That obvious?”
You attempt to back track, “No… uh it’s just I haven’t seen you around in a while."
She looks away for a moment, “ Yeah, I um got a divorce. So I’ve been a hermit as of late.”
“Oh, congratulations.”
Wanda can’t help but laugh at your words, “Most people have been saying they’re sorry to hear, but congratulations? It’s kind of refreshing.”
You shrug, “Well I don’t think divorce is always a bad thing. It’s hard for sure, but it’s better than staying in a situation you don't deserve.”
“What if I was in the wrong?’ Her eyes are glued to the floor as she speaks.
“I may be overstepping again, but I doubt that's the case. You don't seem like the kind of person,” your tone doesn't make her argue, instead a look of relief crosses her face.
“I'm not,” she says taking a deep breath.
You smile at her, “Then it’s their loss.”
She smiles back at you, “I guess you’re right.”
Glad to have made her feel even a little bit better, you begin to leave the aisle she's in. You dint get far before there’s a gentle tug on your wrist. You turn back to stare into Wanda’s warm green eyes.
She’s nervous as she speaks, “I don’t know if I’m too old to be doing this, but fuck it. I could really use a friend right now and I was wondering if you’d be open to getting coffee or something, whenever you’re free.”
You stare at her for a few seconds before nodding, “I’m off in about 15 minutes, there’s a café a few blocks over that I think everyone should try at least once.”
Her excitement builds up in her features. She clears her throat to hide it, “I’ll wait for you by the YA novels?”
“Sounds perfect.”
From that day on Wanda wasn’t just a regular customer anymore, she was your genuine friend. She was also one of the sweetest people you had ever met in your life. She was unbelievably strong too.
The details of her divorce were quite messy. A touch of infidelity here and there, mixed with a custody agreement was a recipe for disaster.
You always offered to be there in any way you can’t for. She usually turns down your more serious offers for help, and sticks to fun small outings. You can tell that she’s somewhat embarrassed by her situation, but you don’t think there’s anything she should be embarrassed about.
“Y/n, I know I said I was free to go out today, but Tommy is sick and Billy isn’t doing that great either, can I give you a rain check?”
She called you and you could hear the tiredness and distress in her voice, “Let me come over and help you, Wands. Two sick kids is rough work, I know you could use a hand.”
She’s silent on the line, but the coughs and sinus filled conversation doesn’t stop.
Wanda sighs, “Okay, do you think you can bring me some medicine? I’ll text you some ingredients I need for soup too if that’s alright?”
“Whatever you need, I’ll see you in a bit,” you say simply.
You follow through on your word picking up various cough, cold, and fever medicines along with some cough drops. You nearly forget about the stuff for the soup, until Wanda texts you something she left off the ingredient list. After picking up everything you head to her house.
You’d been to her house before, but never when her kids were there. You had seen them with her a few times at the library, but back then you didn’t quite deduce that they were her children. It feels so obvious now, but Wanda was definitely a young mom in your opinion, or at least she looked like one.
You rang the doorbell and waited with the groceries in your hand. It took a moment but eventually the door swung open revealing Wanda. Though your hands were full, she’s the one who had bags under her eyes. She looked as though she would fall over any second.
“You’re a godsend Y/n,” she tries to take the bags from your hands but you don’t let her.
“And you’re sick too, here I figured this would happen,” you rummage through the bags and pull out a medicine that’s for adults.
“It’s drowsy.”
You nod, “I know, I figured you need the rest anyway, let me handle its.”
Wanda shakes her head, “Are you crazy? You think you can handle my two kids and me on your own?”
You smile at her, “You underestimate me, Maximoff. Let me show you what I can do.”
“We’ll see, but first come meet them properly.”
You sit the bags down in the kitchen, opting to take the medicine upstairs with you. She takes you to their room.
Tommy is propped up in his bed watching as Billy plays videogames from his spot on the floor.
“Tommy, Billy, this is my friend Y/n. She’s going to help us out today,” Wanda introduces you.
“The library lady,” Billy sounds congested as he speaks.
You nod your head enthusiastically, “ Yep, that’s me. I heard you boys were sick, so I brought some stuff to make you feel better.”
Tommy gags, “Ew medicine.”
You sympathize with him, “Ew is right, but it’s worth it I promise. In fact, I’ll sweeten the deal, you guys take your medicine, and I’ll make you the best soup of your life in return.”
“Better than mom’s?” Billy questions.
“ 1 million times better,” you egg him on.
Tommy is more hesitant, “I don’t know.”
You get closer to him, crouching so you can meet his level, “How about when you’re feeling better, we go out to the arcade and get some ice cream too.”
That seems to be enough for the boy, “That sounds awesome.”
While you’re chatting with them Wanda starts to prepare the medicine cups for the boys. They take the medicine with all the dramatics that children do.
“Ok, we’ll be back to check on you guys, shortly. Billy, get some socks baby. Tommy stay under the covers sweetheart."
The both of you exit the room and head back down the stairs. Wanda moves to start unloading the groceries, but you stop her.
“If you’re not going to fully rest, at least sit. I can make the soup,” you point to the barstools she has in her kitchen.
“Are you sure? I can help-"
You block her from opening the next bag. She looks into your gaze, which holds no feeling of malice or resentment. Instead she finds a warn and tender look behind your eyes.
“I’ve got it.”
She listens to your directions and takes a seat
She watches as you prep the ingredients, ever so often asking where she keeps certain things. Otherwise there is a fluid motion to your movements in the kitchen.
“You know you don't have to take them to the arcade just because they took the medicine, right?”
You pause slightly from chopping vegetables to look up at her, “I probably should’ve asked if it was okay with you first, but I don’t mind taking them. They seem like good kids, which isn’t a surprise at all considering they’re your kids.”
She beams at your words, “They’re a little more docile in this state, but they can be a handful at times. We haven’t really had a big outing like that since the divorce, I’m sure they’d appreciate it.”
“Then consider it done, as soon as they’re better let me know. We can all go out and have some fun.”
Wanda can’t help the feeling she gets hearing you talk so nonchalantly about going out with her kids. It’s something like a spark, that she hasn’t felt in a long time. She takes this time to really look at you, you’re stunning. Truth be told Wanda had always found you a little attractive, but she wrote it off as you just being conventionally good looking. However now, with you standing in her kitchen cooking for her and her kids. She’s starting to think it’s more than that.
“Do you like children, Y/n?”
“I have a soft spot for kids, it’s partially why I chose to work at the library. I had kind of a rough upbringing as a kid. It was just me and my mom, and money wasn’t all that great, but I remember her taking me to almost all the community events they hosted at the library. We spent a lot of time there. When I was old enough to go on my own, it was rare that I didn’t go. The library is such a haven for kids it’s one of my favorite things about it.”
Wanda felt herself melting under the sincerity of your words, “That’s really sweet.”
You start cooking down the vegetables before you answer, “Yeah, if I wasn’t so crazy about the library, I would’ve been a chef. I actually applied to a few culinary schools in high school, pretty ambitious but I had won a few competitions. I had offers and full ride scholarships to some of the best schools out there, but I chose to become a librarian instead.”
Wanda tilts her head to the side playfully, “So you weren’t just talking shit when you said you’re going to make a soup 1 million times better than mine.”
You laugh, “Technically I’m using the ingredients that you told me to get, so it’s more like our soup. I’m just tweaking a few measurements and cooking it a little different. It’s like a group project, if you will.”
Wanda laughs even harder, “You’re so full of shit.”
“Language, there are children present.”
Wanda rolls her eyes, “They’re upstairs."
“Children have super good hearing Wanda, trust me, I’m a librarian.”
She shakes her head with a small chuckle. She watches as the soup comes together a lovely aroma fills the kitchen, her mouth waters at just the smell.
“It smells delicious.”
You motion her over to the stove next to you. She scurries over, which makes you smile. She looks utterly adorable and ethereal at the same time. You began to notice it over the last few times you had hung out. Wanda was simultaneously the cutest and the most beautiful woman, you think you’d ever met in your life
“Taste,” you hold a spoon full of soup up for her.
She hesitates a little, but decides to just eat from the spoon while you hold it. Her eyes close as the flavors dance on her tongue. She lets out an involuntary moan, that has her blushing as soon as it leaves her mouth.
“Oh my god, that’s the best soup I’ve ever had in my life,” Wanda stares at you in awe.
“I hope the boys think so too.”
Wanda helps you fill the bowls for them, “They’re going to love it.”
True to her words the boys devour the soup going as far as to ask for seconds. Neither of you can deny them another bowl. Once they eat, you can see the food working in tandem with the medicine to tucker them out. Before they’re completely out of it you and Wanda get them ready for bed.
It feels more normal than either of you expected. By the time you’re done, both twins are now in bed. The tv plays something at a low volume, but you and Wanda are both aware that the kids will likely be asleep as soon as you leave the room.
When you leave you head back to the kitchen fixing 2 more bowls of soup for Wanda and yourself. You eat amongst each other with small chatter, but it’s comfortable. When you’re done, you almost have to fight Wanda to allow you to do the dishes.
She pouts, once again sitting at the barstool watching you clean.
“You haven’t let me help this whole time,” she whines.
“I’m here to help you, not the other way around,” you remind her.
Wanda places her hands on her hips, “But if you’re doing everything, what am I supposed to do?”
“Just sit there and look pretty,” you say without thinking.
Wanda feels her face heating up, losing track of how many times it has happened today alone, “Look pretty, huh?”
You can feel your ears heating with embarrassment, “oh I- well.”
“Oh my god are your ears turning red, that’s literally adorable. Are you flustered, Y/n?” Wanda teases.
You glare at her with faux-anger, “My ears? Your cheeks are just as red.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about?”
You wash your hands, quickly drying them before approaching her. You keep walking until there is virtually no space between the two of you. You look down at her, you don’t stop your eyes from dropping to her lips.
“Oh really?”
She looks up at you, her cheeks indeed, red like you had mentioned.
“And if they were?”
“Maybe I’d say that it’s adorable,” you use her words against her. “Or maybe…”
“Maybe what?” Her eyes dart to your lips.
You look back into her eyes, “Maybe, I’d kiss you.”
“I’d like that.”
That was all you needed to hear. She met you halfway and, in an instant, you were kissing. Your hand rested on the small of her back, while her hands locked around your neck. It was cliché but it was cute. The kiss itself was respectable, but still filled with a feeling of longing.
Wanda’s hands drop from your neck to lightly push you back, “I’m divorced with two kids Y/n-"
You stop her before she can even rant, “I know, Wanda. I’ve been here, maybe not the whole time, but most of it. I don’t care that you’re divorced and I’d love to get to know your kids. I’d love to get to know you better.”
“I feel like you already know me, Y/n. We’ve been friends for over a year now. We’ve spent so much time together, I’m just surprised you’re not tired of me yet.”
You take her hands in yours, “I could never get tired of you. I’m quite literally asking for more. Let me take you out some time.”
“Are you sure?”
It’s bold, but you place a quick kiss on her lips, “Positive."
From there things just seem to fall into place. You kept your promise to the boys, taking them out when they recovered from their sickness. Wanda was impressed by how well you mingled with them considering her ex always seemed to struggle to relate. However you, had no problem tapping into that childlike like amazement that the kids felt.
Soon after that outing, you and Wanda went on your first real date. You took her out to a nice restaurant. It was an upscale establishment, the prices weren’t even on the menu. Wanda tried to fret about how she didn’t know if she deserved this kind of treatment, but you always reassured her.
You believe she deserved the best and as long as you could give it to her you would.
It only took 4 dates before you asked her to be you girlfriends, not being the best at waiting. Luckily for you she agreed and truth be told if you would’ve asked her on the first date she probably would’ve said yes then.
At this point you’ve been dating for a little over a year. The twins are with their father for the weekend, and Wanda is staying over at your apartment.
The two of you are on the couch. She’s resting in your arms as you watch tv, “Wanda.”
She looks up, “Yes, detka.”
“How attached are you to your house?”
Her eyebrows furrow, “Why?”
You hold her gaze, “Is it crazy if I say that I want us to live together?”
Wanda plays with your fingers, “No, I don't think so.”
You kiss her forehead, “It’s just a thought.”
“You want to buy a house?”
You nod curtly, “We don't have to leave the area, I know the boys have school and I wouldn't want to pull them away or make them start fresh or anything, but I’ve been looking at some homes in the area. Something a little bigger, Billy and Tommy could both have their own room and a huge backyard. Maybe a dog, in the future.”
Wanda cups your face gently, pulling you down to kiss her, “I would love to buy a home with you Y/n.”
“Really?”
Wanda kisses you again, “Really.”
“I love you,” your eyes softening as the words fall from your lips.
“I love you too.”
Your lips are connected again, this time neither of you break the kiss. Instead Wanda shifts in your lap to straddle your waist. Her hands playing with the tiny hairs on the back of your neck. Your hands start at her thigh but end up sliding up to her hips, and soon your fingers are in contact with the cool skin of her stomach.
You aren’t able to stop yourself from kissing down her jaw. She moves her hair and cranes her neck to give you more access. Your teeth sink into her neck only for your tongue to soothe the skin. You suck the spot tenderly, causing little whines to emanate from Wanda.
“Y/n,” your name is breathless on her lips.
She doesn't have to say anything else for you to stand up with her still in your arms. You carry her to the bedroom. Once you’re in there and her feet are on the floor, you pull her shirt off. Yours follows after.
Wanda feels herself getting wet under your gaze. The way you take in her bare chest, eyes blown with want. While you stare she gets rid of the rest of her clothes. You eagerly do the same.
You pull her flush against your body. Skin heating upon contact.
“You’re perfect,” your thumb toys with one of her nipples.
Your head dips to take it into your mouth. You suck lightly, ever so often slowly fanning your tongue over the nipple. You do the same to the other nipple, while your hand cups her warmth. You moan at her wetness.
“ I need you,” she whispers.
You kiss her tenderly, backing her onto the bed. You’re gentle as you ease two fingers into her. She arches her back slightly, and her kiss becomes sloppier.
You’re in no rush as you slowly build pace. Her finger nails dig into your back.
“More please,” she buries her head in your neck.
You begin pumping at a faster pace, using your thumb to stimulate her clit. Her ragged breaths in your ear only turn you on even more.
You jolt as you feel her hand in-between your legs. Her fingers play through your folds and you hear her gasp in your ear.
“All for me baby?”
You nod, “All for you, Wands. Can I taste you, baby?”
“Fuck,” Wanda murmurs.
She pulls her fingers from you, signaling for you to suck them. You take them in your mouth, swirling you tongue around the digits, high off of your own taste.
Once her fingers exit your mouth, you maneuver down her body. You momentarily take your fingers out of her. She doesn’t have time to complain before you’re sucking on her clit.
“Holy shit,” she entangles her hands through your hair.
You keep eye contact with her as you lick, suck, and slurp her pussy. She throws her head back, taking her lip between her teeth. You can see sweat illuminating her body.
Soon you add your fingers back and you can feel her approaching her edge.
“I love you, I love you, I love you,” she keeps repeating the mantra as she reach her peak.
You don’t stop when she cums on your tongue, only slowing your motions, to help her come back down.
“You did so good for me baby,” you say kissing up to her lips.
She shifts so her thigh is against your dripping cunt, “Your turn, my love. Use me.”
You see her flex her thigh, which causes you to moan, “Fuck, Wanda.”
Your hands rest on her shoulder as you begin to grind down on her. Her hands are on you, but the movements are all yours. Wanda watches with blown eyes as you fuck yourself on her thigh. Her hands climb up your sides to massage your breasts. You bite your lip as her fingers play with your nipples.
Wanda sits up slightly, just enough to get her mouth on your body. She sucks on near the top of your breasts, trailing hickeys across.
“I love it when you make a mess on my thigh, cum for me, moya lyubov.”
You cum all over her thigh. Her arms wrap around your midsection holding you steady as you shake. Her head rests against your chest, listening to your wild heart beat return to normal. She places a delicate kiss on your shoulder.
“I love you.”
You kiss the top of her head, “I love you too.”
Once you’re both cleaned up, you settle in bed for the night. You’re start out as the big spoon but soon Wanda turns to face you.
“I was so scared before you came into my life,« she admits.
“Wanda-"
She shakes her head, “Let me finish. I was so lost, I didn't know what to do, if there was anything I could do to feel like myself again. There were so many days I went through thinking I was unlovable. Then you show up, and all of those feelings and thoughts just leave. I’ve never felt so cared for. You make me remember all of the things I love about myself. You make love seem so easy, it feels obvious when you’re with me. I’ve never experienced a love like you’ve given me and I need you to know I love you too. I’ve never felt what I feel for you with anyone else.”
Wanda starts out loud and sure, but by the end her voice is quiet. She doesn’t break eye contact, fighting against her insecurities.
There are no more words shared between the two of you. Wanda kisses you with everything she is feeling and you return her fervor. She pecks you again before burying her head in your chest. You hold her tightly in your arms wondering how you ended up being so lucky.
Her words make emotion swell inside of you. Your voice cracks when you speak, “You are the love of my life. I was doing alright before, but you and the boys are truly everything I’ve been missing in my life. Getting to be with you, a part of your family, it means everything to me Wanda. Thank you, for letting me love you.”
#lowkeyerror#lowkeyanswers#lowkeyrequest#wanda maximoff imagines#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda maximoff#billy maximoff#tommy maximoff
732 notes
·
View notes
Note
hi mae, how you've been? if your request are open could i make one? if they're not, please ignore this ^^
could you write remus with (gn) reader that struggles with english? (as a language fjdndnd). for example, they could be an exchange student and finds difficult to find the words to communicate, but can completely understand a whole conversation, like its just hard for them to express themselves? idk if you get what i mean, sorry for the nonsense 😭😭😭
you write beautifully, i can't wait to read the next thawing out chapter!!!!! xoxoxo
Thank for requesting angel <3
cw: hints of maybe some social anxiety (?) around language learning
Remus Lupin x gn!reader ♡ 1k words
In group settings, you’ve become an unintentional wallflower. The conversations among this group, specifically, are too rapid-fire for your tentative tongue to keep up with, so you find yourself tracking it and letting your own thoughts pass unvoiced. At least at Sirius’ Christmas party, you’re not the only wallflower in the mix.
Remus acts much like you, sometimes. He sits back, listens, smiles to himself at his friends’ antics. Sometimes James or Sirius will prompt him with a question, like they’re used to having to drag him into their two-man show, but for the most part he seems content to enjoy being around everyone in quietude. Until, at least, he leans over to speak to you.
“You alright?” he asks in a low voice, underneath the story James is telling about Christmas shopping with his mum.
You blink, surprised. “Yes.”
“You seem a bit quiet.” Remus looks curious, but he doesn’t push. There’s a tiny fluttering in your stomach at being noticed. You’ve talked with Remus on a couple of occasions—and it’s true, you did have more to say then than you do now, in this bantery group—but you wouldn’t have expected him to note the change. “How’s your drink?”
He’s looking at your cup, nearly full despite the hour you’ve been nursing it.
“It’s…” You don’t know the polite way to say what you want to say. Maybe there is none.
Remus smiles. “You aren’t in love with it, then?”
You think you might go still, just the phrase in love sending heat to your cheeks. “It’s not very bad,” you try to laugh. “It’s…what’s the word…heavy?”
His brows furrow for a second, but then he realizes. “Oh, is it very strong?”
You nod, relieved. “Yes.”
He laughs. “Well, that’s what happens when Sirius makes them. Sorry, we ought to have warned you.” He glances over his shoulder at his friend, as though checking whether he’s been overheard; you don’t get the impression he would care much if he had. When his eyes return to you, you have the impression of staring into a fireplace; a steady, comforting warmth. “Come with me,” he says.
Remus leads you to the kitchen. To the scene of the crime, where your first drink was concocted. Sirius is nothing if not well prepared; the counter is stocked with rows of alcohol and mixers, plus canned drinks and non-alcoholic options. Remus finds you a new cup.
“What do you like?”
You can see a bottle of what you want on the counter, but the name eludes you. You’re not close enough to try and read the label. “Anything.”
Remus’ eyebrow twitches. “Really, anything?” He looks at you. It feels like being peeled like a tangerine, like he’s somehow seeing your squishy insides. “You don’t have any preference?”
You gnaw the inside of your cheek. “I, uh…” You reach past him, picking up the bottle. “This, please. Sorry, I don’t have the name…”
“That’s alright,” Remus says easily. He gives you a gentle smile as he takes the bottle from you, and your heart does something awful behind your ribs. “You don’t need to know it. Whatever works, right?”
“Right,” you echo embarrassedly.
He asks you to pick a mixer, and when you point again starts to pour. “So,” he says, “is there a reason you’re not talking to us?”
You blink at him. “What?”
“You’ve just been keeping more to yourself tonight.” There’s a hint of something you can’t identify in Remus’ tone, but you can’t seek clues in his face when he’s looking down at your drink. “Is it something we did?”
“No. I’m not…no.” You shake your head fervently. “I like you.” You take Remus’ wrist, and he looks up, surprised. “I like you.”
“Hey, it’s okay.” His voice softens at the distress in your expression. “I was only joking, sweetheart. I’m sorry.”
Relief seeps into you. You feel your posture ease, your face clearing, but Remus only melts further.
“Oh, I’m sorry.” He wraps an arm around your shoulders, drawing you into a hug. “I didn’t mean to freak you out. I didn’t really think you were angry with us.” Your arms come around him too, on instinct, and he presses a kiss to the top of your head. “It’s just that you’ve been so quiet and I wanted to ask why, but I was only teasing.”
“It’s okay.” You laugh a little, giddy on physical contact. “It’s not you.”
Remus hums, still apologetic. “What’s going on, then?”
“Nothing’s going on.” You search the far corners of your mind, reaching for the words. “I’m quiet because…because I’m slow. It’s more difficult with many people.”
Remus pulls back a bit, frowning. “You’re not slow, sweetheart.”
“My English is slow,” you clarify.
“That’s…no.” He shakes his head. “I’m sure it does take longer to find the right words, but you don’t have to stay quiet because of that. We can wait.”
“It’s okay,” you try to explain. “Sometimes, people need to talk fast, but, for me…it takes time.”
“That’s fine,” says Remus. “We get it. Or, actually, we don’t, which is probably the more important part. You speak more than one language. That’s not something any of the rest of us can say—well, except Sirius, but his parents were twats, and he’s more of a twat for it, honestly.” His eyes widen a fraction. “Not that knowing more than one language makes you a twat—Sirius is, but you aren’t. I’m not trying to call you a twat.”
You shake your head, smiling.
“I’m trying,” Remus laughs, “to say that you’re very smart, much smarter than any of us in there who only grew up speaking English and haven’t aspired to anything more since. So if you need to speak a bit slower to get your point across, that’s perfectly alright. Is that…did that come across right?”
“Yes,” you laugh, warmth in your cheeks. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me.” Remus gives you another hug, briefer. “Just don’t be quiet, yeah? How’s this?”
You take a tentative sip of your drink, trying to wrangle your smile. “It’s good,” you assure him.
“Good. Let’s go.” He starts leading the way back to the party. “You had something to say when Lily was talking about her botched muffins last week, I could see it on your face. I want to hear all about it.”
#remus lupin#gn!reader#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x gn!reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin x self insert#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fic#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin hurt/comfort#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin scenario#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin oneshot#marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders fandom#the marauders#hp marauders#marauders era#marauders x reader
452 notes
·
View notes
Text
everybody knows i'm a good boy, officer
kento nanami could have been one of the calmest and quietest people you’d ever met.
since you started university, you had managed to get along with everyone, but kento remained a complete enigma to you.
it was obvious he didn’t enjoy talking much. except for his two overly social friends, gojo and geto, the only people he spoke to were professors. his handsome face rarely showed any emotion, and he didn’t attend parties or even the smallest gatherings.
in short, nanami kento was the epitome of a lone wolf.
what was strange, though, was how no one else seemed curious about him. to everyone else, nanami was just a quiet, ghost-like figure who seemed to think about nothing but his classes. but to you, he was an endless ocean waiting to be explored. there was nothing you wouldn’t do to get to know him, to spend time with him, to learn everything about him.
or rather, there was nothing you hadn’t done already.
every time you tried to talk to him, he acted like he hadn’t even heard you, leaving you standing there, humiliated. once, you bought two of your favorite chocolate wafers after noticing he liked them too, only for him to give the one you offered to gojo instead. (gojo ate anything chocolate, after all.) there was even a time when he missed class for the first time ever, and you, thoughtfully, took detailed notes for him. the next day, you saw him sitting on a bench in the courtyard, looking utterly drained. you approached him with a warm smile, greeted him, and explained that you had taken notes for him. instead of gratitude, however, he snapped at you with a voice so harsh it shattered your world.
“for god’s sake, leave me alone already! everywhere i go, you’re there, staring at me the moment i turn my head. at first, i thought ignoring you would make it clear i wasn’t interested, but now it’s seriously bothering me. i don’t want your notes, your wafers, or anything from you! if you really want to help me, stop talking to me. actually, don’t even look at me.”
this was definitely not the reaction you had expected. you had imagined far different scenarios in your head—like him thanking you and offering to buy you coffee, or simply taking the notes and saying nothing, as usual. you had never anticipated him spilling his hatred for you like this.
staring at him in shock and sadness, you managed to stammer out, “oh… i’m sorry, i didn’t know i was bothering you.” placing the notes on the bench beside him, you turned away. “you’ll never see me again. you can relax now.”
holding back tears that were threatening to fall, you quickly walked away and left the campus. though you cried on your way home, things only got worse once you were there. sure, he didn’t have to like you, but he certainly didn’t have to yell at you like that. maybe kento nanami wasn’t the amazing man you had imagined him to be. maybe he was just an arrogant jerk.
you felt so awful that you decided not to attend the party you’d planned to go to that night. even when your roommate begged you to come, all you wanted was to stay home and finish the caramel ice cream you’d bought.
halfway through the tub of ice cream, a text from your roommate made you jump up.
roomie: you need to come to the party. roomie: i need help!!! roomie: pls it’s urgent pls!!
you immediately threw on whatever you could find and headed to the party.
the house was crowded, and as you searched for your friend, your eyes locked onto someone you never expected to see—nanami kento. what the hell was he doing at a party? especially when he had looked so dead tired earlier?
breaking eye contact, you continued searching for your friend, eventually finding her cornered in the backyard by some guy. anger surged through you as you ran over.
“hey! are you seriously the kind of asshole who takes advantage of drunk people?” you yelled, shoving the guy hard enough to make him stumble back.
“what the fuck’s your problem? she’s the one who wanted to come with me. who the hell are you to interfere?”
“listen, if you don’t back off right now, i’ll—” your words were cut off when the guy’s hands wrapped around your throat, slamming you against the wall.
“oh, please, tell me,” he sneered. “what are you gonna do? fight me in front of everyone?”
you struggled for air as your vision blurred, your teary eyes unable to make out what was happening. suddenly, the pressure on your neck disappeared, and you gasped for breath, coughing as oxygen filled your lungs again. through the haze, you recognized the deep, sharp voice of your rescuer.
“close your eyes,” nanami’s voice commanded softly. “i don’t want you to see what i’m about to do.”
then came the sound of fists connecting with flesh, followed by the guy’s groans of pain.
“people like you don’t understand words, so let me make this clear,” nanami growled. “if i ever see you looking at, talking to, or laying a hand on the woman i love—or any woman, for that matter—i swear to god, i'll kill you without a second thought.” you thought he might stop, but he didn't, continuing to beat the man relentlessly. “on second thought, i've changed my mind.”
someone had to stop him before he seriously hurt the guy—or worse. you tried to approach him, but before you could, geto and gojo had already pulled him away, calming him down.
your friend, finally snapping out of her shock, rushed over to check on you. your throat still ached, and your emotions were all over the place. earlier today, nanami had made it abundantly clear how much he hated you, yet here he was, saving you.
“god, this is all my fault. shit, your neck… are you sure you don’t need to go to a hospital?” your friend fretted.
you shook your head. “this isn’t your fault at all. that bastard deserved what he got. as for me, i’m fine. really. i’ll just put some cream on it—”
“i should’ve killed that bastard,” nanami muttered, his voice cold and firm. turning to face him, you saw his hands covered in blood. despite the situation, you couldn’t help but think he looked incredibly attractive.
violence is bad, you reminded yourself.
“thank you,” you said softly, “for saving me and my friend.”
nanami’s eyes, full of worry, settled on the red marks around your neck. his fingers hesitated before gently tracing the bruises. “always,” he murmured. his attention then shifted to your friend. “are you okay?”
your friend stammered, “y-yeah. thank you so much. i don’t know what would’ve happened if you hadn’t been here. i’ll be more careful from now on.”
“the only thing you need to be careful about is how much you drink. don’t blame yourself for some creep’s behavior.”
okay, maybe nanami had told you to stay away from him earlier, but every word he spoke now was making you fall for him even harder. how could you not be drawn to someone who was both a gentleman and terrifyingly capable of breaking bones?
“i guess i’ll have to drink less from now on. um, i’m going to the bathroom. you two seem like you have things to talk about.” your friend quickly excused herself, leaving you alone with nanami.
a heavy silence hung between you until you finally broke it. “i should go home.”
“of course. do you want me to drive you both home? i haven’t had anything to drink—”
“no, thank you,” you cut him off. “i don’t want to trouble you anymore. good night.” you managed a small smile and turned to leave, but his voice stopped you.
“wait. i… i’m sorry for today. i was out of line.”
okay there we go...
“i’m the one who should apologize. i didn’t mean to bother you. i just… never mind. i didn’t have bad intentions. i just wanted to be friends with you, that’s all.” you gave him a genuine but bittersweet smile.
“friends?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.
“yeah. but nevermind. thanks again for saving us, and you should probably get your hands checked. they don’t look good—not just because of the blood, but you hit him so hard, i’m worried they’re broken—”
“do you remember what i told that guy?” he interrupted with an unrelated question.
“what?”
“i told him if he touched the woman i love, i’d kill him.”
oh.
you didn’t remember that part. you’d been too focused on trying to breathe. wait—why had he said that?
oh… maybe he meant your friend.
trying to hide your disappointment, you mumbled, “i-i didn’t hear that, but i’m sure my friend would be happy to—”
nanami let out a deep laugh. “you still don’t get it, do you?”
“get what?”
“what made you think the woman i love is your friend?”
“i don’t know.” you honestly didn’t. you just stared at him like an idiot.
his smile widened. “you wanted to be my friend,” he said slowly. then he leaned in close, his voice dropping to a whisper. “but i’ve never seen you as just a friend. and i never will.”
all you could do was swallow hard. every bone in your body trembled.
nanami kento was saying he liked you. no—he was saying he loved you.
nanami kento… loved you.
shit.
“okay,” you blurted out, the only response your brain could come up with.
“hmmm… is that all? what does that mean?” he asked, his tone teasing.
“it means i accept your feelings.”
“oh, i see. and what do you think of me?”
looking down in embarrassment, you muttered, “i think a few things…”
“good things?” he pressed, his voice still playful.
“not anymore.”
“why not?”
“you almost killed that guy,” you teased, even though you knew the bastard had deserved it.
brushing a strand of hair from your face, he smirked. “i don’t like seeing the things i care about get hurt.” his fingers trailed gently along your cheek. “if you’re free tomorrow, i’d like to take you out and change the way you see me.”
say yes! both your heart and brain screamed at you.
“it might be hard,” you replied, “but i’d like to see you try.”
“leave that to me.”
you both laughed, the tension easing between you. just as nanami was about to offer to drive you and your friend home again, a police officer approached.
“are you nanami kento?”
“yes, sir,” he replied confidently.
“you’ll need to come with me to the station to give a statement. you may spend the night in custody for assault.”
whoever said quiet, sexy men couldn’t commit crimes clearly hadn’t met nanami kento.
a little note: i was originally going to write a christmas-themed one-shot about nanami, but i haven't had the time since i got back from my trip. so, i decided to write something like this instead. i love possessive nanami, yeyey!
all rights belong to the @moonlitwitchdaisy do not copy, reproduce, or translate my work.
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk fanfic#nanami kento#nanami kento x you#nanami kento x reader#kento nanami x reader#kento nanami x you#kento nanami#nanami x reader#nanami kento angst#nanami kento fluff#jujutsu kaisen angst#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen fluff#nanami x y/n#nanami x you#nanami kento x y/n
503 notes
·
View notes
Text
I've seen a lot of people talking about how Barbie talks about how the patriarchy affects women and how well it does that, so I wanna talk about how Barbie talks about how the patriarchy affects men and how well it does that. Because it does that really well tbh.
At the beginning of the movie, it's made very clear that the Kens are constantly competing with each other, and trying to prove their worth, their Ken-ness, to both the Barbies, and more importantly, to the other Kens. In fact, multiple times through the movie it's shown that Ken seems to find the opinions of other Kens as a motivator for him to do things. He tries to show off to Barbie only after he sees the other Kens saying hi to her. He only starts dancing with Barbie when he sees the other Kens dancing with her. He only goes with her to the Real World after another Ken accuses him of cowardice and he decides to prove him wrong. Barbie says "Ken's not cool!" and Ken responds "He is to me."
This shows so damn well what the patriarchy is like for men. Because for the Kens it's not necessarily about Barbie, it's about what other Kens think of you. Being a man you are constantly, incessantly trying so damn hard to prove to the other men around you that you are a man, the manliest man to ever man, the best Ken to ever Ken. Literally doing backflips trying to prove yourself. And this is before patriarchy is even officially introduced to the story, there's no undertone of power yet, this is just what it's like to be a man around other men. It's toxic masculinity.
And when the patriarchy is introduced, that's increased tenfold. At first it looks like they've banded together to take power, but really they're still competing with each other, they're just doing it differently. Rather than competing to see who can get Barbie to fall in love with them, they're competing to see who can be the manliest, have the manliest stuff, wear the manliest clothes, have the manliest house and decorations.
And then they literally go to war. War is considered one of the few places where it's socially accepted for men to be more emotional, form deep and personal bonds with other men, and that's exactly what happens in the movie. They go to war, and there's an entire song where they bond and learn not to fight with each other anymore.
And that I think is the message from the Kens. For men, the way the patriarchy affects them is it forces constant competition and animosity, even around people that are supposed to be your friends. It makes it impossible to express your feelings unless they're with a romantic partner, and all of this turns you into a pent up ball of emotions with nowhere to go.
Which means that the message is: In order to fix the way the patriarchy oppresses men, men need to learn how to form close bonds with people, especially other men. Because like Barbie said to Ken, he needs to discover who he is without her. Men have learned to lean on women as a crutch, using them to figure out how to Be A Person and express emotions in a healthy way, but this can very quickly turn into a woman feeling like she needs too be his mother and teach him how to do these things. And Ken was 100% doing this, or at least he was trying to throughout the movie. Ken was so desperate for Barbie to be in love with him, not necessarily because he loved her, but because he needed a person he could just exist as himself around. Because he couldn't do that with the other Kens, the only person he could be himself around was Barbie.
And what's so great about the end of the movie is that the Kens did eventually figure out how to form close bonds with each other! They went to war, argued and fought, but by the end of the song they were holding hands, kissing each other on the cheek, telling each other they were enough. Even when Ken is up in the dreamhouse, crying and saying that he looks stupid, all the other Kens start shouting back up to him, saying that he looks cool. And Ken responds by giving one of his new friends his coat, which was clearly very important to him.
What the Kens did, that's what men in the real world need to do. They need to form close bonds with other men and stop competing with each other. Hopefully not by going to war the way the Kens did, Barbie isn't a blueprint for solving the patriarchy lol.
I'd be happy to do it through a song though.
#barbie#barbie 2023#the barbie movie#ken barbie#barbie movie#greta gerwig#ken#barbie ken#meta#barbie meta#barbie movie spoilers
5K notes
·
View notes
Text
Commodus Masterlist
I see you all are thirsty for our Emperor Commodus lately so I made a masterlist just for you ! (if you are interested by other characters here's the link of my full masterlist! )
SFW:
Let’s just stay here a little while, You are feeling down lately, thankfully, your husband Commodus is there for you.
Pampering Commodus, after a hard day the Emperor needs to relax and be pampered. Fluff
Queen or thief of my heart?, The reader is poor and is mistaken for stealing from a street vendor, and she is brought before Emperor Commodus to be killed but upon seeing her, he recognizes her as a childhood friend of his…will he save her life as a token of the past?
Periods, you have your periods for the first time with your husband Commodus, you are ashamed but he comforts you in that tough time of the month.
Your attitude may hurt me, but mine can kill you, quote challenge, Commodus is having another paranoia episode.
You should kneel to your Empress, Commodus’ Empress is mixed race and she overhears people at the palace making remarks about her and her family even though without her, they wouldn’t have trade or peaceful relations with a prominent tribe in Africa. Commodus hears it and defends her.
The virtues of an Emperor, this follows the moment when Commodus learns he won’t be Emperor, but it takes a slightly different turn, he is not alone this time.
Elysium, Commodus comforts you after one of your friends died
The light in my darkness, Commodus has always been afraid of the dark.
Sleepless Slumber, Commodus suffers insomnia
I will feed on your hate, Commodus hears people criticizing and it hurts more than expected
My never ending loyalty, male reader, preatorian’s guard love story with his emperor on the Eve of the fight against Maximus.
Everything will be okay, you lost someone dear to you, Commodus is by your side to help you through grief
MIX OF SFW AND NSFW
The world will be ours, part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, You are the heir of a kindgom conquered by Rome. To strenghen its bound to the Empire, the Emperor has made an offer your family can’t refuse… you will marry his son Commodus, but you are scared of him and he doesn’t want to marry you, but Rome is hostile to Commodus reign, what will be your role in this, will you learn to love each other?
The world will be ours Sequel, this fic follows the life of Commodus with you, you had two beautiful, children, he is finally happy and loved but then something terrible happens… Part 1, Part 2
No one will oppose us, Commodus ends up crying during sex that leads to an early end, you comfort him and take care of whatever emotions bubbled over.
NSFW:
Anything for Caesar NSFW, rough sex smut one shot
Commodus the whore of the Empress NSFW, Imagine a parallel universe where Commodus falls from grace, you become Empress and he becomes your bitch (part 2 on my friend’s blog Part 3 , Part 4
The One rule, you have disobeyed Commodus and he punishes you in the best and yet worst way. NSFW
If only Rome knew how much you sacrificed for them, after the final fight against Maximus in the Colosseum, you find Commodus’ body among the corpses of those dead in the arena, he had been carelessly tossed there as if he was no one. He is alive, barely, you decide to save him. But what will happen if he survives? Will he claim back the throne? Chap 1, Chap 2, Chap 3, Chapter 4, Epilogue
You are my Empire, one shot about Commodus being a sub in your relationship, smut and fluff.
The disappointing son, Commodus falls for a slave, prisonner of war. He doesn't care about social status, all he wants his drink and perhpas more, just llike you do.
The morning after, Commodus receives a visit from you, a very dear friend. You decide to celebrate your reunion after years, alcohol is flowing, leading to unexpected events.
HEADCANONS:
Vanity
Quizzes
The melancholia of Commodus and your comfort
Celebrating Saturnalia/Christmas with Commodus
Commodus x Plus size reader
#joaquin phoenix#commodus#commodus imagine#commodus x reader#emperor commodus#gladiator 2000#gladiator
437 notes
·
View notes
Text
Batman figures out Dannys secret identity but the thing is that hes not in the system. Like any system. His face isnt a match for anyone in any database anywhere??!?! This needs investigation. So someone bumps into him for some dna. Which turns out wasn’t even needed because he got stabbed while defending Damian so we got fresh blood samples now baby! But nothing. Not even a relative or anything.
What they do learn is that he just started appearing on cameras a little over 6months ago but before that? Nothing. And he doesn’t seem to be any older than 15 (hes 16 and a half fuck you batman) but how could someone so young be so hidden in the system. Hell even in paper records they can’t find anything in him.
Maybe Bruce can vent to his Justice League friends…. No who am I kidding man would rather die then that. Probably Red Robin (yum) who gets to vent to his friends. Anyway I just need Clark added to the mix because I want him to think Danny isnt human. Boiz heart isnt going fast enough. If it’s going at all. Holy shit Bruce is that a ghost?? Ahh a ghost! … ok wait I hear a beat phew not a ghost. But he might need medical help.
Oo maybe now we have something. A reason hes not jn any record. He might be a testtube baby. Look at how scrawny and guarded he is. Aww B he might have been some sort of labrat. Oh we gotta help him out. He hardly gets any social interactions so it totally makes sense. Look at him B he doesn’t even run from Joker (I hardly know her). We have to protect this poor lost child.
Oh lord now the batclan is spiralling with crazy theories about him.
Do you think Danny would know too? Like maybe hes watching all the nonsense unfold. Or hes trying very hard to convince the bats that no hes just a normal human 16 year old. Like he ho la di da look at me just a normal kid doing normal kid things.
#danny phantom#dp x dc#dpxdc#I have to go back to work now bye bye#I have more thoughts kn this but im out of time#oops im actually late#wish I had time to tag
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
* GENERAL OBSERVATIONS, PART TWO.
4H URANUS folks have probably made quite a few friends online at some point in their lives, and believe that making friends online is much easier for them than making friends in person.
MERCURY SQUARE URANUS aspects prolly LOVE getting into arguments with random people on social media — they just can’t help themselves 😭 They need to be careful to avoid being “preachy” and forcing their sociopolitical views on others. Work on taking the time to learn about both sides of a polarizing issue before actively participating in debate.
Those with VENUS-SATURN aspects may find it difficult to make connections that have the potential for close friendships; VENUS-CHIRON aspects may find it difficult to keep and maintain friendships.
VIRGO STELLIUMS may have a unique ability to predict what will go viral on social media before it actually goes viral, particularly if their stellium is found in the 5H, 11H, or 10H.
I’ve noticed a lot of CAPRICORN, GEMINI, and SCORPIO placements in the charts of both modern and historic influential politicians.
Most colleges and universities begin their fall semesters during VIRGO SEASON.
It’s interesting that as schools begin their fall semesters and first quarters, the MOON is in the 9H of education and higher learning. In mundane astrology, the moon represents the general public, so it makes sense that the general public would be focused on education right now.
10H SATURN natives tend to have strict parents — especially fathers — that hinder rather than help their most formative childhood experiences. Here, the native must learn how to separate their core identity from that of their parents and step out from their shadow.
6H MERCURY might enjoy watching “Get Ready With Me” videos on TikTok or YouTube, and could’ve considered becoming a content creator themselves at some point in their life.
ASCENDANT-SATURN hard aspects, how’s your fall allergies going? If you have this placement, you could be prone to catching a cold, being immunocompromised, or having severe allergies. (Do NOT use this interpretation as evidence for a medical diagnosis.)
AQUARIUS SATURN may be prone to feeling like an outcast in social settings.
5H MARS radiates HUGE theatre kid energy to me, especially when it’s in a fire sign.
#astro community#astro observations#astro notes#Scorpio#Capricorn#Gemini#mercury in the 6th house#aquarius saturn#* astrology
583 notes
·
View notes
Text
little doll — coriolanus snow ༘❀⋆
♡‧₊ warnings — coryo being possessive, p in v, unprotected sex, fingering (f. receiving), rough sex, lmk if i forget anything!
♡‧₊ pairing — coriolanus snow x fem!reader
♡‧₊ a/n — wrote this for @etfrin bc me and her were obsessing over coryo (like always <3)
masterlist | bc: @cafekitsune
to coryo, you were an innocent little doll that he loved to play with and if anyone else tried to even lay a finger on you, he would make sure they were done for
you always took coryo to your house after school to help you with your homework or to study
coryo let you take him, you were so stupid that he knew if he didn't help you in any way he could, you would fail and have to drop out the academy and he didn't want to lose his pretty little doll
being dumb was the exact reason you never realized coryo had an unspoken claim on you, always keeping a hand on you and staring down everyone who tried to make conversation with you
this led to people starting to stop talking to you and you still didn't understand why it happened, but everyone else pitied you for being so dumb
you had asked coryo about it and he just brushed it off, giving you a kiss after which left you shocked since you never knew coryo had a romantic interest in you
but whether you liked it or not, one thing led to another and you ended up in your bed, naked with coryo under you as your eyelids became heavy and coryo stroked your hair, shushing you everytime you were about to say something
you got used to this, having sex everytime after you two finished studying. if you were good and could answer all the questions correctly, he would fuck you nicely, being gentle and praising you, but if you didn't want to study and were giving him a hard time or weren't answering any of the question right, he would fuck you hard, not letting you come or he would fuck your throat, not giving you any pleasure and leaving your house right after that
on this particular night, you had understood the concept, so coryo was gentle with you and let you come and stopped once you started feeling overstimulated
���coryo?” you ask after a while
“yeah doll?” he said, his eyes opening and continuing to stroke your hair
“why do people not talk to me? they always talk with you…what did i do?” you ask, your eyes looking filling with tears as a few threaten to spill
“oh sweetie shhh” coryo says, holding your head to his chest as you cried
you weren't used to people ignoring you since even though you were dumb, you were very social which made people love you
“it's nothing, they're not real friends…ok doll?” he said shushing you and you eventually find yourself asleep after coryo pulls the covers of you two and cuddles you, kissing your head from time to time
the next day, after you coryo go your separate ways, you go to clemensia to see why everyone was avoiding you
she gave you a hug, which confused you but you were grateful for
“it's because of coryo…he's threatened people if they get too close to you, he's really possessive over you, you know?” she replies after you two start walking to lunch together
this left you stunned, you would've never guessed that coryo had been pushing people away from you, but just as you were about to respond, coryo came out of nowhere and kissed you, putting an arm around you as he looked at you happily
“hi doll, hey clemmie” he said, giving clemensia a cold stare but that was all gone the minute you looked up
clemensia gave you a knowing look, saying goodbye to you and coryo as she left
“what was that about?” coryo said looking down at you
“nothing…let's go get lunch” you said not wanting to tell coryo what you found out but he could see it in your eyes
“hmmm i think we should go grab lunch and then go to an empty classroom and study…you have that test tomorrow anyway” coryo said grabbing his lunch, as you grabbed yours
“do we have to?” you asked, coryo knew how much you hated studying
“yes doll, you're never going to learn if you don't continue studying” he said, leading you to an empty classroom, letting you go in as he locks the door behind him
you sit down at the desk, starting to eat when coryo grabs you, pushing you on the table
“what the fuck did she tell you?” he hisses, his face close to your ear as he starts moving his hand up your skirt
“nothing coryo! why the fuck do you care?” you spat, trying to move
coryo didn't like that, you were being disobedient and one thing about coryo is that he only tolerates obedience and anything else gives him a reason to punish you
“why the fuck do i care? it's because your mine doll, no one is allowed to have you but me” he says, pulling off your skirt and ripping your panties
he laughs as you try to claw at his arms, your pussy is slick
“so pathetic doll, can't even tell me that you just want to get fucked hm?” he says, grabbing your arms and pinning them together to avoid you hitting him with your hands
you whimper, shaking your head as coryo shoves two finger in, finding your g-spot quite easily and repeatedly slamming his fingers in, leaving you a whimpering moaning mess
as he adds a third finger, which makes you moan loudly, he starts kissing you, sucking hickeys on your neck and shoulders
after coryo thinks you’re stretched out enough, he takes his fingers out, licking them clean before pulling down his pants, his cock painfully hard now at the thought of being in your warm cunt
without warning, he slams his cock into you, ramming the table into the wall as he fucks you hard, making sure that you got no pleasure from it
you kept whimpering, letting out broken moans and attempting to form coherent sentences but coryo just laughed at your attempts
“what’s wrong doll? too fucked out to even object?” he said, slamming into you with even more force and sucking hickeys all over your breasts
you kept babbling about how good his cock felt and letting out moans and coryo knew he had fucked you dumb already if you weren’t already stupid
coryo enjoyed this because he just wanted control over someone, which is something he had been deprived of his whole life until you came along
finally you stopped babbling, going quiet and that’s how coryo knew you were going to come, quickly pulling out before you could which left you a mess
you had tears running down your cheeks and you were whining, coryo had other plans though
“doll open your mouth” coryo said, pumping his shaft a few times before cumming on your face, some of it landing in your mouth
you still felt like crying, you had a good build up but coryo pulled out before you got to finally have the knot snap
coryo notices and laughs, getting dressed again while you just lay there, catching your breath
“next time, don’t go asking people to tell you things that i’ve already told you ok?” he says, kissing your forehead and leaving the classroom
#🎀 — fics#tom blyth#tom blyth fluff#tom blyth x reader#tom blyth smut#tom blyth imagine#coriolanus snow#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus snow smut#coriolanus x you#the hunger games#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#tbosas#billy the kid#billy the kid smut#young coriolanus snow
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
Let Me Wrap My Teeth Around The World
Warnings: minors DNI, small age gap (everyone is 18+), manipulation, love-bombing, possessiveness, social anxiety, the male gaze, financial exploitation, obsessive behavior, ownership, toxic dynamics, moral corruption, smut, virginity loss, coercion, dubcon, dark
Word Count: 4.1K
It’s been a while since Coriolanus found someone as the object of his affection. The last time was a few years ago, and it did no good for him. But this shy, sweet, beautiful Capitol girl was someone who could pose no risk to him and seemed to have wormed her way into the recesses of his mind.
She was the shy girl in one of his University classes. Rumors circulated about her wealth or lack thereof. She was some prodigy who earned her way into the school through merit rather than money, and it left an open inquiry as to who her parents were. He didn’t know what drew him in. The House of Snow had just regained a semblance of wealth and power, and associating with a girl like her could easily create cracks in the foundation.
She wasn’t wealthy enough to come from a district family who bought their way in, but she certainly wasn’t like the other students who took classes with her. Though she wasn’t wealthy, she wasn’t necessarily poor, at least not as poor as his family used to be, but he could recognize the signs of the consistent repair in her uniform, using the same stitches Tigris would use on his old clothing. It turns out she had come from a family of seamstresses and artists.
He also learned that she loved pretty things, not just spotting them but making them. Her apartment was always decorated with little knick-knacks and drawings that covered the walls. Coriolanus would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy spending time in her dingy apartment. It was small, run-down, nothing more than a studio with a bed, desk, kitchenette, and a heat pipe that screeches and clangs at the most ungodly hour. But he loves staring at how her brows furrow as she sketches or how she tucks her lower lip between her teeth in frustration. Despite being unable to help her work, she was always happy to have him around.
This leads him to her small apartment at least once a month with a new pair of pants that were a bit too long or one of his father’s old shirts
Even though he could afford to have his pants hemmed by a tailor or simply ask Tigris, he prefers going to her. After all, she’s become familiar with his preferred inseam length, and Tigris has become colder and colder towards him.
He always insists on paying her even if she refuses.
“We’re friends, Corio,” She said the first time. “You don’t have to pay me.”
“Just this once, let me take care of you.” He insisted, pressing the cash into the palm of her hand.
Just this once turned into every single time. Then, it became buying her meals and small gifts. He got her internships with other high-ranking game makers. Eventually, he convinced her that her old apartment was too small and worn down for a nice girl like her, and he moved her into a spare room in his apartment and turned the other into a studio. Then, he started taking her to parties and events she could never afford to go to, and he always made sure to buy her a dress even if she insisted that it would cost less if she could just make one herself.
When their fellow students would snicker at her, he’d slip poison into their drinks. Never enough to kill them, just to get them sick for a week or so.
Somehow, Coriolanus finds himself taking her under his wing, becoming a mentor to her in some type of way. She maintained that soft and sweet air about her, but with his help, she became someone her peers respected. Once, she was the girl who made other students in the University roll their eyes because she always tried too hard. Now, she was the girl who had connections and handed in exemplary work. She was the carefully created success story of a middle-class Capitol girl who climbed the ladder with hard work and determination. Now, she could spread her wings and fly, but only as far as he would allow.
With the arrival of winter comes the start of planning another year of games, and the Crane family was more than happy to host a commencement gala.
This time, he bought her a pretty red dress she eyed in a store window a few days ago.
The quiet gasp she lets out when he opens the box is music to his ears.
“It’s even more beautiful in person.” She whispers the fabric pooling in her hands like blood. “I can’t let you keep buying me things like this. I can’t take this.”
He fights the urge to roll his eyes. She always opposes, with her voice becoming soft, objections and promises to pay him back, tumbling from her lips. But that wasn’t what he cared about. He cared about how she presented herself. He got her internships and dragged her out of that shoebox of a studio apartment. She was a product of his hard work, and he wanted to show it off. “Think of it as a gift.” He smiles, gently lifting her chin to meet his eyes. “You’ve worked hard these past few months.”
“Corio…”
“Put it on; we have to leave in a few minutes.”
…
She’s stuck to his side whenever they attend these events. Her shy demeanor doesn’t do well in large crowds, and with an endless supply of expensive liquor, Coriolanus doesn’t want her wandering about alone.
Throughout the evening, she’s been good. Smiling, looking pretty. Saying hello to the people he introduces her to, holding onto his arm, and letting him know when she’s feeling overwhelmed so he can rub circles on her back.
People compliment her, telling her how beautiful she looks. Pride thumps against his chest. Of course, she looks beautiful. The dress he picked falls on her body like it was made for her. The red is beautiful against her skin, and the fabric drapes beautifully around her hips, showing off her elegant back.
Eventually, she breaks away from him, needing to use the restroom. But after a while, he realizes something isn't right without her beside him.
He worries when he can’t see her, and he finds himself rushing through small conversations and pushing past people to try and find her in a sea of people.
Eventually, he spots her staring at the city's vast expanse, leaning on the balcony's edge. She’s slowly nursing her third glass of champagne in one hand, and the other picks at the cuticles of her thumb.
That wasn’t a good sign.
“What’s wrong?” He inquires, approaching her with a hand on her back.
She jumps at his touch, but relief crosses her face when she sees him. The last of the champagne is quickly swallowed, and she passes the empty glass to an approaching waiter.
“Nothing, really. I’m okay.”
From the tension in her forehead, he can clearly tell that she isn’t okay. Though he knows she hates it when he pries, he still chooses to do so.
“You aren’t, so tell me what’s wrong.”
There’s a beat of silence, and she sighs.
“I feel out of place, Corio. I feel like I don’t belong here.”
“What do you mean? Of course, you belong here.”
“Everyone here is just so…” She looks down at her heels, trying to find the right words “I don’t know, I’m younger than everyone, and most of the people here have played a part in the games and all I’ve done is get coffee and print papers for them.”
Her lashes flutter as if blinking away tears, and he can’t have that. Not here.
“Hey,” he lifts her chin with his fingers and strokes her flushed cheek with his thumb. “Don’t get all tearful on me. You’re with me. I promise you, you belong here.”
From the frown curling on her lips, his words clearly aren’t working, so he shifts the conversation. “What do you dream of being? What do you want to do?”
She opens her mouth but hesitates.
“Promise you won’t think it’s stupid?”
“I promise.”
“I’d like to be a designer.” A small smile starts to cross her face. “A fashion designer with my own line and everything.”
He could see a future where everyone in the Capitol wore her designs. Or not everyone. She was too good for that. All of his hard work has been put into helping her rise alongside him. If she wanted to do something, she had to be the best.
“I think you would make a great designer.” Without a second thought, he presses a small kiss to her forehead. “I know you will. I’ve seen your work.”
A giggle falls from her lips, and affection blooms in his chest. Nowadays, he wonders if he could ever love someone. But love is so subjective. He had molded her into someone who would be fit to stand by him as he rose in the ranks. Isn’t that the closest thing there is to love?
…
“Here, let me help you.”
The champagne has loosened her up, causing her to stumble on her feet. She leans against him and laughs when his arm hooks under her knees to carry her past the front door.
“Such a gentleman.” She croons. “Always taking care of me.”
“It’s what I do best.”
He sets her down on the edge of his bed so he can bend down to undo her heels. Without much thinking, he gently kisses the inside of her ankle. His eyes gaze up at her, gauging her reaction, and she shyly tells him, “I really want to kiss you right now.”
It’s as if something in him shifts. Coriolanus always harbored an attraction to her. On multiple occasions, he would fuck his fist after their little “tailoring” appointments, thinking about her on her knees, his cock stuffed in her mouth. Ever since she moved in, he’d sneak glances through the crack of her door, catching glimpses of her in stages of undress. He’s never acted upon it. His ego certainly wouldn’t be able to take the rejection, but now that she’s asking him to kiss her with those soft lips and glittering doe eyes, he’s safe to act on his desires.
He surges forward, engulfing her in his hold. Hands cupping her face to keep her lips pressed against his. His teeth graze across her bottom lip,
She smells like vanilla and roses, igniting that deep-seated hunger inside him.
He has always hungered for power within the political spheres of Panem, but right now, his hunger is hyperfocused on her. To own her, to control her.
He wants her to answer every beck and call. If he were to say jump, she would ask, ‘How high?’ If he asked her to crawl to him, she’d drag her delicate knees across whatever surface she stood on. He wants her to belong to him—mind, body, and soul.
Their lips are locked together as her hands fumble to remove her dress. Sensing her struggle, he releases her face to help, undoing the ties around her neck. She carefully lets it fall off her body, letting the vibrant red silk pool around her feet.
“I’ve never done this before.” She murmurs against his lips. “I haven’t done anything past kissing.”
“Really?” He looks down at her and wants to coo in adoration when she shyly glances away. “No one’s ever touched you before?”
“Just… myself… and this one boy from the academy a few years ago but it was over our uniforms.” She hesitates, and he can feel his cock twitch in his pants. Coriolanus already owned most of her clothing, living space, and future career. It was all owed to him. But her virginity? He can truly make her his. His girl.
He crawls on top of her, caging her in his arms.
“I’ll be gentle. I promise.”
His fingers trace her skin, from the line of her neck past her collarbones, dipping under the white lace underwear that clings to her hips.
“These are pretty.” He flicks the rosette sewn to the center of the waistband. “Did you wear these for me?”
“Maybe. I made them myself.”
She lifts her hips, allowing him to slide them down her legs. They part, creating room for him to slot himself in between her knees. Her hands reach to remove his shirt, but he bats them away.
“Just relax. I’ll take care of you.”
As he unbuttons his shirt, he observes the way her chest rises and falls, how her lips are parted, and how her tongue darts out to lick at her lips in anticipation.
His fingers push past her lips, pressing down on her eager tongue, already swirling over them.
“Get them wet. I don’t want to hurt you.”
Her eyes close as she sucks on the digits. Saliva pools in her mouth, dripping past the corners of her lips.
They are released with a pop, and Coriolanus groans, the strain in his pants becoming unbearable.
Two of his wet fingers slide between her folds, teasing at her opening. A gasp slips past her parted lips at the feeling of his fingers pushing in. It was torturous how he managed to curl his fingers just right, eliciting a stifled whine from her lips. She pulls her hips away, overwhelmed by the stretch and the growing pressure inside of her. Though he knows she’s fingered herself before, his fingers must feel foreign, better than what she can do for herself.
He pushes a third inside of her, opening her up, and he can feel how she flexes around him. She wraps her fingers around his wrist, trying to pull his hand away, but he persists, continuing to curl his fingers against that spot inside of her.
“Don’t fight it.” He demands, pistoning his fingers. “I’m just trying to make you feel good.”
Her gasps and whines eventually turn into moans. She clenches around his fingers and bucks her hips forward as if her body is begging him for more.
“I think,” She arches her back, and her voice becomes gaspy as if fighting to fill her lungs with air. “I think I’m close.”
“Already?” He spits onto her clit and presses his thumb against it. Electricity surges through her body as he rubs it in slow circles. She watches him with parted lips and shaky breathing as he fuels her oncoming orgasm. “Oh, you’re making this too easy for me.”
Her head is thrown back, and a strangled moan falls from her lips—sticky arousal floods around his fingers, and her walls spasm around them.
“There you go.” He soothes, pressing kisses to her cheek. “That feels good, huh?”
She’s laid out on the comforter, chest heaving and skin flushed. Coriolanus grabs his stiff cock through his pants, trying to ease the growing tension. But he decides he can’t wait to give her a break.
Her ears perk up at the metallic clink of him undoing his belt.
“Corio, I- I don’t think-”
He shushes her with a kiss.
“It’s alright, you can take it. Yeah? Remember what I promised?”
“That you’d be gentle.”
“That’s right.” He kicks off his pants and frees his cock from the confines of his briefs. “I’ve always been good to you, haven’t I?”
She nods in agreement, eyes widening at the size of him.
He licks his lips as he presses the tip against her cunt, slowly easing his cock inside of her.
As he sheathes himself inside of her, he presses her thighs to her chest, forcing himself deeper into her warmth.
She lets out a sharp cry and grabs his waist, trying to push him back.
“You’re too big, Corio. I don’t think you’ll fit.”
He hurries to kiss away her complaints. To distract her from the pain. He couldn’t wait. He needed to feel her. He needed her. Whispering against her lips, he soothes her. “You’re okay. I’ll go slow. Yeah?”
Broken moans fall from her lips as he bottoms out. He groans in pleasure as her fingernails dig into his back, scrambling for some kind of purchase. She was so tight, so wet, and so warm, gripping onto him like a vice.
Very carefully, he rocks his hips back and forth, letting her adjust to him. The sounds she makes, combined with the slick squelch of her cunt are obscene. Even with his slow movements, he doesn’t think he’ll be able to last long.
He drops his lips to her neck, teeth grazing the fragile skin before biting down.
“Ah- please, don’t leave a mark.”
Disregarding her words, he sucks a slowly blooming bruise onto her neck. He doesn’t care if it’s dark. He wants people to see it and know who left it there.
Maybe he does love her, he thinks. He loves how she complements him, her sweetness dampening his harsher attributes. He loves her creativity, her ambition, and how she always hungers to better herself. She’s perfect. She could be more than just a designer. She could be influential, a figure in the history of Panem.
“I have an idea.” He hums against her neck, stilling his hips.
“Yeah?”
“I want you to be part of the games.”
“What do you mean?” She impatiently shifts her hips, trying to get him to move again.
“You can be a…” he pauses to think, looking into her blown-out pupils, “a stylist. You can design the tributes' looks for the opening ceremony and the interviews. Maybe we can implement uniforms for the actual games.”
She pulls back, but he keeps her locked in place, hands grabbing at the flesh of her hips. Her eyes no longer look glazed over with lust. Instead, there’s a flash of clarity within them.
“No.”
“What do you mean, no?”
“No, Corio.” Her voice is firm. She has her mind made up. “I won’t do it.”
His lust begins to mix with anger. She can’t deny him. Not now, not ever. Not after everything he has done for her.
His hand reaches for her chin, and she whimpers.
“Yes, you will because I’m not asking.”
“You can’t tell me what to do.” She struggles against his hold. “You don’t own me.”
“Don’t bite the hand that feeds you,” He snarls, fingers digging into her jaw. “I gave you this life, and I can easily take it away from you.”
“Let go of me, please.”
Earlier promises of being gentle are tossed away. She’s beginning to let out pained squeaks from the pressure on her cheeks, and the hand on her hip digs into the soft flesh, creating red divots close to drawing blood.
“Look at all that I have given you. All of your nice clothes and these fancy internships were because of me. Without me, you’d be freezing to death in that shed you used to live in.” He pulls his hips back and slams his cock back into her dripping cunt, eliciting a cry from her. “I made you who you are.” He cruelly bullies his cock into her, picking up his speed every time her hands weakly try to push him away. “All you have to do is be good for me, and I’ll give you whatever you want.” He forces her to look at him, to stare into her glassy eyes. “Are you going to be good?”
She doesn’t reply, or rather, she can’t. All she could do was strain against him with dark, mascara-stained tears rolling down her cheeks.
Those eyes that once gazed upon him with fondness are now filled with fear.
“Are you going to be good?” He punctuates his words with a hand to her throat, giving it a light squeeze. It’s enough pressure to establish a threat but not enough to take away her ability to breathe.
Her teary eyes blink, and she nods.
“Yes,” She whispers. “I’ll be good.”
“So,” He slows his movements and brings his lips to her ear, warm breath tickling her skin. “What do you say?
Once again, he circles her sensitive clit with his thumb.
She sobs, clenching around him, and he can tell that she’s close to cumming again.
“You’re not going to cum until you answer me.”
“Please, Corio, don’t make me decide. Not right now.”
“I want-” He groans, feeling himself falling close to the edge. “I need an answer.”
She sobs and tries to look away, but the hand on her face won’t let her.
“Please.”
His face moves closer to hers, her hot breath fanning his cheeks.
“I can feel you clenching around me, and I know you can’t hold it in. Give me an answer now.” More tears stream down her face, and she squeezes her eyes shut. “If you cum before giving me an answer, I’ll ruin this pretty cunt.”
There’s a second of silence, save for the sound of his skin slapping against hers before she nods.
“Yes,” she whispers.
“Yes, what?”
“I’ll do it.”
He quickens his pace, chasing after his own pleasure, and she all but screams.
The fire in his burns, ready to overtake him, but something isn’t right.
“Open your eyes.” He demands. “I want you to look at me when I fill you up.”
She blinks her eyes open, all wide and wet, and he’s unable to hold back. Tightening his hold on her, he forces his hips against her own, burying his cock to the hilt and releasing inside of her. She flutters around him, desperate gasps for air falling from her wanting mouth as she cums with him.
They stay in this position, both trying to catch their breath. Coriolanus is the first to pull away, rubbing her thighs to loosen the tired muscles.
She lays there, surrounded by his fluffy white sheets, saying nothing. He gently kisses her cheek, attempting to pull an answer from her, but when it proves unsuccessful, he leaves to draw a bath.
…
“You don’t have class tomorrow, right?”
The question draws her out of her gaze, now realizing she’s curled up in the tub with her knees drawn to her chest. The water is warm, cloudy, almost milky, and smells like roses. She couldn't bear to look at him right now, but she managed to force an answer from her lips.
“No,” she fights the urge to flinch when his fingers brush her hair away from her neck. “It’s my day off.”
“Good.” Coriolanus dips the washcloth in the tub and gently wipes it against her skin. “You’ll come with me to see Dr. Gaul. Bring your portfolio.”
Her body shudders at the thought of meeting the woman, but more notably, knowing that the man she held so much love for was nothing like the man he portrayed himself to be.
She once thought that he was her patron, but the truth was that he was her owner. All of the riches she had gained this past year meant nothing now. They weren’t hers. They were his. He had given her a life of safety where she could flourish and provide for her family, but it was one separated from the world she once knew. Her parents and friends from the fabric shop were replaced by the same obscenely wealthy elite who would have thumbed their nose at her if it weren’t for the proximity to him.
Every gentle brush of his fingers on her skin reminds her of what he’s done to her. How he now owns her.
Her mind falls to a lecture from a year ago. It was about evolution and apex predators. The boa, she remembers, was nonvenomous but deadly, wrapping themselves around their prey, squeezing their bodies until their circulation stopped and their lungs could no longer pull any oxygen. What’s more chilling, she thinks, is that they know to monitor their heartbeat, waiting for their heart to stop before swallowing them whole.
He’s wrapped himself around her, tightening his hold. She knows she can struggle, but he won’t loosen his grip. He’ll just constrict around her, tighter and tighter, until there’s no more room for her to fight—no more room to breathe.
“I’ve been very sweet on you, and I can keep doing that.” He hums. “But, I can be cruel as well. You and I both know I don’t want to do that.”
Finally, she finds the courage to look at him; those blue eyes are now colder than ever.
She tries to whisper, but when he raises a brow, she clears her throat and meekly responds.
“Thank you, Coriolanus. For everything.”
#coriolanus snow#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus snow x reader#coriolanus snow fic#coriolanus snow imagine#coriolanus snow x you#dark!coriolanus snow#tbosas#tbosas fic#tbosas fanfiction
2K notes
·
View notes