#why yes I was singing to myself and that was what made me think about this why do you ask

[unma]

Being in the school choir when I was younger was awesome but also sucked because I went through puberty and now all of a sudden I couldn't hit the notes I used to. You'd think I'd be happier that my voice got deeper since I was always teased for having a squeaky voice (or sounding like a rat), but no, I was much more annoyed that I couldn't sing as well anymore.

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

I'm clearing out my draft folder again.

Steve and Robin were running through Starcourt, high as fuck when Steve skidded to a stop in front of Eddie Munson.

"You look like Eddie Munson," Steve giggled.

"Steve!" Robin said with wide eyes. "I think that is - "

"Man, what happened to your face?" Eddie asked.

"Funny story, can you keep a secret from Eddie?" Steve said seriously.

"Sure," Eddie grinned.

"No, Steve, that's - ,"

"ANYWAY," Steve rolled his eyes at Robin. "I had this crush on him in freshman year. Do you think I should tell him?"

"Uh - are you guys on drugs?" Eddie asked.

"YES! But we didn't want to," Robin said. "They wanted information."

"Aw, fuck, there's this guy that works with Rick. Real sketchy. I told him he needs to let him go before he gets Rick into trouble, but does Rick listen to me? Nah!" Eddie exclaimed. "Look, whatever the hell he gave you should wear off. Not all drug dealers are like that. What we pitch to you is what you get. What you want is what you get. Okay, let's get you guys to the bathroom and try to get it out of your system. Come on."

"I'm going to tell Eddie," Steve said with a grin. "Shh! Wait here. I'll tell you how it goes."

Steve ran off with Robin on his tail. Eddie cursed and chased after them. They got distracted by the lights hanging overhead and started spinning around, gazing at them in awe.

"You guys do not want to do that," Eddie said, and they started heaving before they ran off in the direction of the bathrooms. "And that's why."

He ran off after them and into the bathroom room, where they vomited into the toilets. Eddie knelt down next to him and stroked Steve’s hair as he emptied the contents of his stomach. Once Steve was done, he leaned his head into Eddie's touch and closed his eyes, letting Eddie stroke his hair. He whined when Eddie moved away and saw him go to the sink. He came back with a wet, soapy paper towel and started cleaning Steve’s face.

"I guess I'm chopped liver," Robin said. "It's okay, I'll get it myself."

Steve laughed and made a face at the taste in his mouth. Eddie clapped a hand on his back.

"I'll be right back," Eddie said.

He rushed off to buy a couple of toothbrushes and toothpaste. He also picked up what he thought was lip balm. When he returned, he he heard them talking. They were clearly bonding, solidifying their working relationship into a friendship. Or maybe something more considering how Robin was talking about watching Steve. Shit, maybe Eddie should leave. They were talking about someone else now.

"But Tammy Thompson's a girl," Steve said.

"Yeah," Robin said.

"Oh."

Or maybe not. Oh God, Robin was coming out to Steve, and Eddie was overhearing it. Oh God, what should he do? He was frozen to the spot. Steve was going on about how Tammy Thompson was a total dud and how she sounded like a Muppet. Eddie snorted. Yeah, that was true.

"I can't believe you're making fun of my crush," Robin laughed. "What about yours?"

"Hey, at least Eddie can sing," Steve replied.

Fuck! Okay, so he had been telling the truth then.

"How do you know he can sing?" Robin asked.

"My car broke down near the Hideout one night, and I heard him singing. He was playing with his band, Corroded Coffin," Steve said. "They were really good. I was going to go talk to him, but I kind of thought that the drummer was his girlfriend, but that's crazy. I mean, guys and girls can just be friends, right?"

"I like to think so," Robin replied.

There was a long pause in their conversation, which gave Eddie plenty of opportunity to burst through the door.

"Okay, so I have a green toothbrush and a pink one," Eddie said. "Which one do you guys want?"

"Ooh, pink," Steve said and they stared at him. "What?"

"Nothing," Eddie said in amusement.

He watched as they brushed their teeth. Well, he mostly watched Steve.

"So, how much of our conversation did you hear?" Steve asked, setting his toothbrush on the sink.

"What? I didn't hear anything. Were you guys talking about something?" He asked.

"Seriously?" Robin asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I didn't hear anything that you guys didn't want me to hear," Eddie said.

"I don't think you're the kind of guy who would spill the beans on us," Robin said. "At least, I hope not so you don't have to deny anything."

"Ooh, lip gloss," Steve plucked it out of Eddie's hand. "May I?"

"Yeah, I thought it was lip balm," Eddie frowned. "So, have you always known that you liked guys?"

"Not just guys, girls too," Steve said as he started applying the lip gloss to his pouty lips. "I'm bisexual."

"Did you always know you were bisexual?" Eddie asked as he watched Steve’s lips intently.

"Well, yes and no," Steve said. "It was more like a slow build-up to my realization. Like more and more evidence started piling up that I could no longer deny."

"So, it wasn't like you looked at someone one day and realized 'shit, I'm into dudes, now?" Eddie asked as his eyes raked over the swell of his ass.

"It's always kind of been there. Why?" Steve asked as he closed the lip gloss.

"No reason," Eddie blushed, looking at his shoes.

"Oh my god!" Robin exclaimed. "You woke him up."

"What?" Steve asked.

"You woke him up!" Robin exclaimed, and Eddie quickly hid behind his hair.

"It's the outfit!" Eddie shrieked.

"So, what is it about the outfit that does it for you?" Steve asked.

"It's everything! The socks! The shorts that fill out your ass fantastically, by the way! And the shirt with the red bow tie in front," Eddie said. "It's just the whole fucking outfit."

"You should see me in the hat," Steve said in amusement.

Suddenly, Dustin and Erica burst into the bathroom before Steve could say anything else.

"There you are!" Dustin shrieked.

"Hey, could you give us a minute?" Steve asked Robin.

Robin quickly started ushering the kids out of the bathroom.

"But, Steve?!" Dustin asked.

"Out!" Robin yelled and shut the door behind them.

"I like you and as badly as I want to kiss you right now. . . I don't want it to be after I vomited in a bathroom. Plus, you still need to figure things out. If you still want me a few days from now. Call me. I have to deal with these kids I babysit. So go home and think things over," Steve said softly.

There was something that Steve wasn't telling him, but Eddie knew that he was also right. Besides, it was late. Steve placed his hands on Eddie's shoulders and pressed a kiss to his cheek, close to the corner of his mouth. It felt much like Steve was promising him something. Steve pulled away and started moving toward the door.

"Hey, Steve?" Eddie asked.

"Yeah?"

"I'm definitely going to call you," Eddie said.

Steve laughed and walked out of the bathroom, leaving them both with hope for the future.

[creativepromptsforwriting]

Drabble List #8

75 prompts to write drabbles or longer stories.

"Just one of those days, I guess."

"This makes it easier to identify them."

"Have you ever had friendship bracelets?"

"Feel free to walk all over me."

"You're the one stirring the pot."

"I feel like you don't actually believe me."

"What a tragedy this is."

"This will be permanent."

"Oh well, nothing I can do about it now."

"The media is lying to you - and so is everyone else."

"Just gonna pretend I didn't hear that."

"Silly me to assume you would care."

"You should clean the mess you make."

"My life is amazing, it really is."

"Nothing to complain here."

"I can't believe that we finally made it."

"Thank you so much for this opportunity."

"Mark my words, this will not end cute."

"Have you looked in the mirror lately?"

"You look hot, mama."

"Can you bail me out? Please?"

"What a silly thing to say."

"So, this is it? Really?"

"It will never be truly over."

"That is a fascinating tattoo that you have."

"You're going to jail for this."

"What a dramatic exit."

"I know your friends."

"A seat will be assigned to you shortly."

"Here is a list of all the ways you are wrong."

"We should talk about what happened."

"Do you have your ticket ready?"

"I'm sorry, but our personal goals just don't match up."

"The boxes are all labeled incorrectly."

"Well, you should've listened to me."

"Tragic. That outfit is a disaster."

"I'm sitting front row. I always do."

"Oh you silly little thing."

"What is your star sign?"

"I'm not who you think I am."

"Can't say I'm that surprised."

"Truly legendary."

"Please, sing for me!"

"You are a true party pooper."

"No means don't even try."

"I want to find my soulmate."

"Just forget what you heard."

"Why does this always happen to me?"

"Let's go out for a cheap dinner."

"I don't want to hear about it."

"This must be a joke. Not very good one."

"A list of all the times I was right."

"I can't control my dreams."

"Finally, some common sense."

"Throw me under the bus while you're at it."

"What a wonderful surprise."

"Poor judgement is what it is."

"I was just defending myself."

"Fine, but this will be the last time."

"Oh, that's too bad."

"I will take that as a yes."

"Did we meet before?"

"Sell me your story."

"What's the point in all of this?"

"I couldn't see what actually happened."

"Can you lend me some money?"

"So start from the beginning."

"Truly, a flawless plan."

"I haven't done this in forever."

"Let's have some fun."

"What an icon."

"Make me believe it."

"It's an investment."

"There will be an extra fee included."

"Let's go back. Nothing to do here anymore."

Drabble List #1|List #3|List#4|List #5|List #6|List #7

Have fun creating and writing!

If you like my blog and want to support me, you can buy me a coffee! And check out my Instagram! 🥰

[httpsserene]

𝐡𝐭𝐭𝐩𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐞'𝐬 𝐟𝟏 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐭𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥

𝘂𝗽𝗹𝗼𝗮𝗱 𝟴: 𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝗿𝗿𝗶𝘀 𝘅 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 | 𝗽𝘂𝘀𝘀𝘆 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽

📖𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: if lando achieved a podium at silverstone, you promised you’d give him anything he wants. he thinks about it the whole race weekend, and when the two of you are celebrating his second-place finish, he tells you that he wants to take care of you. you’re disbelieving–he takes care of you every waking hour. lando, on the other hand, said that with his chest. and he’ll prove it to you. 📖𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴: 18+ only. explicit. not beta read. service top lando. shy/self-conscious!reader. mention of multiple orgasms. mention of vaginal sex. face-riding/sitting. lando is a munch & simp. 📖𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 1k words. 📖𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴:  lando norris x fem!black!reader 📖𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲: drabble. 📖𝘀𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸: lotus flower bomb • wale ft. miguel

𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗳𝗮𝗰𝗲: different type of smut? idk testing out the vibes with this one—yes, this man has one goal this fic and it’s all about you. which i guess is why it edges more into general worship? and not exclusively pussy worship. made myself mad writing this because no man like this exists, me thinks. have fun shawty mamas :)

do you want to be added to my general taglist? send me an ask!

cross-posted on my ao3, htppsss

to see what kinktober uploads have already been completed or to see what's coming next check my f1 kinktober masterlist ! for all of my works see my general masterlist!

lando pulls your body completely against his, chest to chest as you straddle his lap. he tenderly holds the nape of your neck, using his large hand to coax your head backwards. he leans forward to kiss you but pauses at the last second, and smiles at your body language. as soon as his hand gently tangled into your hair, your eyes fluttered shut and your lips pursed in anticipation for a kiss. instead of pressing your lips together like expected, lando kisses you softly on the forehead. you open your eyes halfway in question, and lando beats you to speaking.

“let me,” lando murmurs, his warm eyes gazing at you lovingly, “you said you’d give me anything i want—so, let me take it.”

he watches the astonished look in your eyes fade into a bashful avoidance of eye contact. he pets at your scalp gently, charmed at how you still shy away when you deem his devotion too intense. lando doesn’t understand why you don’t believe that he actually wants to take care of you, why he wants to love you thoroughly. his brain sings in satisfaction every time he makes you satisfied. you’re his soulmate; you’ve become each other’s rock, he’s not sure if he’d manage to withstand the extreme pressure of his life without you. so, of course when you offer yourself to him in exchange for his home race podium finish, he’s going to take advantage of that—and provide you with pleasure, solely. 

lando allows you to hide, but continues to press sweet kisses around your face. he drags his lips from your forehead, to your cheeks, to your brow bone, to your eyelids, to your nose, reveling in the heat that rises to your brown skin at his attention. he kisses you properly when he feels the tension coiled within your muscles dissipate. the slick sound of your lips meeting rings in the brit’s ears, and he moans into your mouth when he feels your manicured nails dig into his shoulders. lando captures your bottom lip between his teeth and nips teasingly; he wants your lips even plumper than they already are, he wants them to swell from his passionate onslaught. when his tongue sneaks past the seam of your lips as they part around a moan, his kisses deepen. his free hand cups your ass and drags you closer to him—there should be no space between your bodies. he’s become lost under the weight of his own kisses and swallows down every keening moan, whimper, and whine that you breathe into his mouth. he wouldn’t mind if this is as far as he took it tonight, sharing kisses like these quiets his urge to move along. you, however, care little for lando’s content; you begin to circle your hips down onto him in tight, almost unnoticeable grinds. he breaks the kiss to sigh shakily, and fulfills the question he knows you’re not going to vocalize.

“pretty girl,” lando hums at the sight of your already disheveled appearance, you look fucked out. “hmm, you want more, love? yeah, you do—c’mere and ride my face, pretty.” lando chuckles at the way you freeze at his request, and how you choke on your own breath. you’ve been bare on top of him the whole time and unconsciously started searching for more friction from his boxer-clad erection, and you clam up at the idea of grinding on his tongue—like he’s never eaten you out before.

lando doesn’t allow you any time to protest and shrugs off the shirt he’s wearing, tossing it to some random spot on the floor. he relaxes back, lying flat and rests both of his hands on your hips. he watches how your pupils blow, irises shrinking away at your arousal—he’s not going to interrupt you, and gives you ample time to bask in the sight of his toned torso. a handful of seconds pass before your eyes flick upwards to meet his own, and he sees how you automatically hide away from his stare. there’s no need to attempt to hide from him, he knows your intricacies forward and back. lando dismisses your behavior, and bodily lifts you to hover over his mouth. 

he pretends to miss your scandalized cry of his name at the sudden manhandling, and sucks marks into your inner thigh, slowly moving closer and closer to your core. lando presses a final kiss where your navel meets your cunt, and pauses to stare up at you, waiting for your permission. for the first time tonight, you hold eye-contact with him and softly whisper for him to continue, and lando smiles tenderly at the first hint of confidence that leaks into your tone.

building a strong neck is good for his day job, but lando especially appreciates his strengthened neck for this activity alone—he can feast on you without a single complaint concerning cramping or exhaustion. he messily brandishes his tongue through your lips, his moan of delight at your taste vibrating through your most sensitive area. his tongue forms tight circles and flicks against your clit, and he pauses randomly to slurp lewdly against your entrance to make sure he’s not missing any of your essence. lando whimpers depravedly when he feels your hips start to press down on his mouth, rocking against his tongue to direct him where you want—and his eyes flutter shut in pleasure. 

lando will make you come once like this and the resulting dopamine spike will cause your shyness to evaporate. you’ll start riding his face like he wants you to, leading to another orgasm. his goatee will be soaked with your arousal and lando will not care. then, he’ll make you cum once more from his fingers alone—you’ve always had a thing for his hands—and depending on how sensitive you are, lando might make you spray your release all over the fresh bed sheets. he’ll allow himself to fuck you slowly to another orgasm, that coasts over your body smoothly. and when he deems that he’s satisfied his desire of taking care of you, he’s going to paint your thighs white with his release. of course, his pleasure comes second to yours. he has the whole night to worship you, and he doesn’t see his devotion for you faltering any time soon.

taglist: @lorarri @soph1644 @jaydensluv @fanboyluvr @nissaimmortal @redgonerogue @hollie911 @saintwrld@buendiabebeta@butterfly-lover@lana-d3l-rey@dylan1721 @spicybagel14 @dhhdhsiavdhaj@miahgonzalez16@jjaekin @dkbj14 @f1lover55 @f1lov3r @mindless-rock@biancathecool@barnestatic@sweetpiccolo-blog@my-ylenia @zaynzierulez@reblog-princess-blog @lovingaphroditesworld @katekipshidze @darleneslane @inloveallthetime

© httpsserene 2023

[saetoru]

[ LOGIC ] ALHAITHAM.

“haitham,” your voice sings, “are you jealous?” you elbow alhaitham’s side, poking his cheek and quirking your brows as an amused grin tugs at your lips. he only grunts, flipping a page of his book without sparing you a glance and pretending that he doesn’t hear you. “i know you heard me,” you pester, “you are jealous, huh?”

“i have nothing to be jealous of,” he says matter of factly, and though you can’t bring yourself to believe him, you have to admire his persistence even if a little.

alhaitham is not jealous—it’s what he tells himself, at least.

jealousy is an irrational concept, especially when two people have mutually agreed they’re exclusive—which you both have done so already. it’s an ugly emotion, it’s unbecoming of the loyalty you’ve pledged and the trust that exists between you both.

therefore, alhaitham is not jealous.

he simply thinks that logically speaking, the general mahamatra has no business standing that close to you when it’s a well known fact you’re in a relationship. based on his observations (which are seldom wrong) making you laugh so easily should be near impossible—cyno’s jokes are about as dry as the desert sand itself. alhaitham thinks it must be a pity laugh. it has to be a pity laugh—cyno is not funny, not in the slightest. and the way your eyes twinkle as you talk to him is not fondness, it’s kindness—because you’re a genuine person, that’s all.

he watches you both talk for one second, then two, and then he realizes he’s frowning. why is he frowning? there’s nothing to be jealous of when cyno is involved, the rational part of alhaitham’s mind knows this.

alhaitham is taller, a lot more muscular, he’s the (acting) grand sage—and though he hates the position, it’s evidently popular amongst the ladies. he’s smarter, and though neither him nor cyno are very social, he likes to think he’s better at analyzing people’s emotional responses and understanding human behavior. and besides that, alhaitham knows your favorite coffee order and where your favorite spot for lunch is. he knows the crinkle of your nose means you have more to say but you’re biting your tongue. he knows you laugh behind your hand because sometimes you get shy about your smile.

he knows more about you than cyno could ever imagine exists. logically speaking, alhaitham understands you far better than cyno, and he should be the optimal choice. there’s not anything to worry about, nothing that should concern him in regards to his (very stable) relationship with you. but then he remembers the way you laughed at something cyno said, the way the general mahamtra looked at you in surprise before letting his gaze soften with a tiny smile.

he grits his jaw and closes his book.

“cyno doesn’t know you as well as i do,” he starts, making you blink before you nod slowly.

“yes, that’s true,” you ponder, “i suppose he doesn’t. you’ve known me for quite some time now—”

“cyno wouldn’t have as much time for you with all his duties. i, on the other hand, leave work as soon as the clock hits five pm.”

“that’s true, you do have a tendency to leave even if they need you to stay—”

“cyno’s position as general mahamatra makes him the target of a lot of angry and dangerous people, which could prove unsafe for you too,” alhaitham continues, cutting you off.

you frown, crinkling your brows in confusion, and you have to wonder—where is he going with all of this?

“well, yeah, sure. but just so you know, i’m not weak. i can take care of myself—”

“i never said you weren’t capable,” he says instantly, “but the optimal choice for who to date would be me—which you made the right choice, of course. congratulations.”

you snort, giving him a side eye that makes him raise a brow.

“you’re hopeless, haitham,” you giggle.

“and why is that? i’ve supplied more than enough evidence why—”

and then you cut him off with a kiss. it’s a gentle kiss, a slow one where you cup his cheeks, rub the soft skin in delicate circles with your thumb, cradle the back of his head and hold him close as you linger and let him steal a taste of you while you steal one of him too.

alhaitham pulls away in a daze, the book in his hand falling to his lap without the page marked before he can even realize it, long forgotten as you press your forehead to his.

“only you would give me evidence why i should choose you,” you say, clearly amused.

“technically, it’s not evidence why you should choose me if you already did,” he retorts.

and he’s right—you have already chosen him, and you can’t say you regret it. sure, alhaitham is hard to read and nearly impossible to predict. just when you think you have him figured out, he surprises you in more ways than one. he’s too smart for his own good, and his impressive (and sometimes irritating) ability to come up with a rebuttal to everything has moments that make you want to peel your own skin off. he’s blunt and sometimes dry and it drives you up a wall that he answers you with that know-it-all attitude of his.

he never lets a single emotion sway his decisions, and you often whine over every minor inconvenience. he reads books in his free time while you look for something to watch on tv. he rarely wants to leave the house, yet you always have somewhere you want to explore or a new place you want to try. logically speaking, it shouldn’t work, but it does—and cyno will not disrupt the routine that is you, the routine that has so naturally knit itself into his life, for even one moment.

especially not with those bland jokes of his that don’t even have a proper punchline.

“just because you have an answer for everything doesn’t mean you need to give it,” you huff, “and i’m right this time. you are jealous.”

“like i said,” he shrugs, “i’m not jealous.”

“oh yeah? so if the general mahamatra requested my help for another investigation, then you wouldn’t—”

“the general mahamatra has made it this far without your help,” alhaitham says dryly, and if you look close enough, you might just make out the beginnings of a pout at the edges of his lips.

you laugh, scratching gently at his scalp as your fingers thread into his hair. “why else are you better for me?” you hum, cupping his cheek and kissing the corner of his mouth.

now that—that’s a question alhaitham will always have endless answers too. he relaxes, closes his eyes and lets you kiss along his jaw slowly as his hands find purchase of your waist.

“we’d be here all day,” he mumbles, “it’s a lengthy answer.”

“i got time,” you wriggle your brows. he chuckles—and when you laugh too, the sound of your voice in perfect harmony with the sound of his, he thinks he’s found yet another reason why.

“cyno doesn’t know you sing in the shower when you think you’re home alone,” he smirks, rubbing your hips up and down as you gape at him.

“what do you mean—”

“and he doesn’t know your favorite orders or the way you like your coffee. overall, the best option for you is me,” he nods, fighting back a chuckle when you roll your eyes.

“you sure put a lot of thought into this,” you mutter.

“of course,” he shrugs, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. and perhaps it is—there’s a sense of rationality he loses when you’re around. instead, a sense of rawness, a sense of something dangerously close to hope. “i spend a lot of time thinking about you,” he adds softly.

your face softens, and your eyes twinkle in a way that they certainly did not when cyno was around—and he suspects it’s from a lot more than just a bit of kindness.

“you sure you’re not jealous?”

“no,” he grins, “i’m very sure i’m right.”

“for once,” you kiss the corner of his mouth, watching it twitch as he stares at your lips and fights the urge to chase after them, “i’ll have to admit you’re right.”

[just-dreaming-marvel]

Love That Burns ~ 2

LOVE THAT BURNS MASTERLIST

< previous chapter

Word Count: 2,530ish

Summary: You get to know your new teammate James. Stryker's team goes on a mission. (The Reader will continue to call Logan, James throughout the Origins movie and here and there throughout the rest of the series.)

Warnings: violence

Notes: I really couldn't help myself, posting two days in a row. I'm just so excited for this series! The next chapter will be out next week! Reminder: I DO NOT do taglists. Please don’t ask. Please follow and interact! I appreciate any reblogs, likes, comments, and asks! Also, help me decide the endings!

You had basically stayed clear of your new teammates in the week they had been there. You weren’t exactly the welcoming type, focused on not being homeless again. You spent most of your time in your room or working on your abilities. Stryker had made sure there was a firepower room in the facility so that you had a safe place to practice, which others rarely entered.

Fire filled the room as you practiced your powers: throwing the fire, heating and melting items, as well as building walls for protection. As you practiced, you failed to notice James slip into the room. He had gone looking for something to light his cigar and he followed the smell of smoke. When he opened the door and saw you maneuvering the flames, he was mesmerized. James hadn’t known what to think of you, especially when you were clearly avoiding him and Victor. You were a beautiful woman but there was a fire inside of you that he wanted to know more about.

Still not noticing that you had an audience, you shot flames out of your hands at the wall that James was leaning against.

“Shit!” James exclaimed as he jumped away from the fire, his shirt getting singed. With a twist of your wrists, the flames around the room disappeared. “You may want to watch where you're shooting those flames, sweetheart.”

You shrugged. “Didn’t see you. I normally don’t have an audience.”

“Clearly.” James pushed himself off the wall and headed towards you. You noticed the cigar between his fingers and lit it. A flash of surprise went across James’ face. “Thanks.” He took a drag of his cigar before letting the smoke billow out of his mouth. The earthy smell took over your senses and you didn’t mind. “I wanted to apologize for Victor.”

“It’s fine. I’m used to it.”

“Doesn’t make it right.”

You tilted your head slightly as you studied James. Just from the few interactions you had with him, it was clear that James was constantly picking up after his brother. You wondered why.

“You’ve got some ability,” James commented.

“It’s come in handy from time to time. Do you have an ability? I assume you do because Stryker’s really only interested in mutants.”

James held up a fist as three bone claws extended from his knuckles. You couldn’t help but reach out and gently touch them. James watched in wonder. No one had ever looked at his claws the way you were currently, with awe and not fear.

“Is it the same on the other hand?” You asked, fingers still running over the claws.

“Yes,” James responded. When you finally pulled away, James retracted his claws.

“Does that hurt? When they break through your skin?”

James was taken even more back now. No one had ever asked him that. No one had ever cared. “Every time… Does, uh, do the flames hurt your skin?”

“No,” you shook your head. “Well, as long as they come from me.”

James nodded, not knowing what to say next but he did know that he wanted to get to know you more.

“I’m going to go clean up,” you tell him. “See you around, James.”

He nodded, watching you slip out of the room.

~~~

James may not know you well, but he did know one thing. He hated it when Wade was around you. Wade was constantly propositioning you or being incredibly inappropriate. Victor occasionally joined in as well. You simply ignored the comments while James was growing furious.

“Maybe if we both take our shirts off then she’ll—“

“That’s enough,” James growled, cutting off Wade. You were sitting close by, trying to ignore the men by reading a book.

“You want to get in on this Howlett? Or are you just jealous that we have the balls to—“

“I said that’s enough!” Suddenly, James had his claws at Wade’s neck.

“Calm down there, kitty.”

“James, it’s alright,” you told him, standing up. “Let Wade go.”

“Listen to your master, kitty.”

James shoved Wade with a grunt as his claws disappeared. Suddenly, Wade’s hair burst into flames. He began to freak out as you laughed, leaving the room. James followed, the anger still controlling him. You entered your room, leaving the door open for James. He found you and leaned against the door frame. 

“You don’t need to fight by battles, James,” you told him as you tidied up.

“They shouldn’t be talking about you like that,” his voice was still rough and filled with anger.

“I’m used to it. People talked before Stryker found me.”

James had never heard about your life before this and was interested to learn more. He stepped into the room and closed the door before leaning against it.

“I was homeless for years,” you continued. “I used my abilities to steal but that never gave me a bed to sleep in. So, sometimes, I would sell my body for money and a bed for a night.” James inhaled sharply. “Sometimes there were multiple men and women involved. They often talked about my body like I wasn’t even there. I just ignore it.”

“I’m sorry.”

You looked at him curiously. “What for?”

“You shouldn’t have had to deal with any of that and continue to deal with it.”

You shrugged. “The price I pay to meet my basic needs.”

“Doesn’t make it right, sweetheart.”

“Well, there’s nothing I can do to change that… This life is better than homelessness.”

James hated how right you were and how okay you were with the way the others treated you. He wished so badly that he could fix it and he would do his best to try.

~~~

While the other men continued to talk the way they did, James made sure to continue to be sweet and gentle with you. He tried to not make it obvious, saving some things for when the two of you were alone. You wouldn’t admit it, but your interactions with James were making you feel things you never thought you would. You enjoyed how sweet and caring he was, always looking out for you during missions and making sure you were okay afterward. The two of them began training together, eating together, and even just sitting in silence together. You would be reading while he puffed at a cigar. It was nice. The closest thing you could get to domestic bliss in your life. 

James hated flying, which you quickly realized on his first mission with the team. That is why you were currently sitting next to him on the jet. He was leaning forward, elbows on his thighs, with his hands together, almost like he was praying. You were sitting close enough that your thighs were brushing each other, hoping that the small touch would help.

“You know, I love this weapon more than any other thing in the whole wide world,” Wade said as he sharpened one of his swords. “Do you wanna know why?”

“No,” Victor replied.

“It’s memorable. Sure, it’s a little bulky, tough to get on a plane. You whip out a couple of cowards at your ex-girlfriend’s wedding, they will never, ever forget it.”

“That’s funny, Wade. I think you confuse me with someone who gives a shit.”

“Right, it’s probably not as intimidating as having a gun or bone claws or fire. Or even the fingernails of a bag lady.” Victor’s claws grew out while Wade gripped his sword tighter. Wade held up his sword filer. “Manicure?”

“Victor,” James tone was one of warning, “easy.”

“Fred got a new tattoo. I’m concerned.” Wade was always one to jump from topic to topic.

James looked past you to see the new tattoo on Fred’s arm. “Oh, geez, Fred, you just met her last night.”

“I love her,” Fred said, getting emotional.

“You love her after one night?”

“She’s a gymnast.”

“I’m sure she’s great,” you told Fred, patting his leg.

“Bradley, take her down,” Stryker ordered. The jet began to descend with a turn.

“Oh, God,” James groaned, leaning forward again.

“Are you gonna puke?” Fred asked, taking a bite of a protein bar.

“If we were meant to fly, we’d grow wings.”

“Don’t worry, Nancy,” Zero said. “More people die driving than flying.”

“How about from impaling?”

“Hey, be nice,” John told James, “or be your approximation of nice. Would you like a bucket?”

“No,” James grunted as he tried to calm his stomach.

You placed a hand on his back, rubbing small circles on it. You could not care less about the others watching you and James. 

“Gentlemen, Y/N, wheels down in Lagos in five,” Stryker announced.

~~~

Stryker led the team to a taller building at the edge of the city. It was heavily guarded with tanks and armed men.

“Why are we here?” James asked.

“All in good time,” responded Stryker. “Zero?”

Zero stepped up, getting all the guns aimed at him before he started firing. He flipped over the large fence as he fired and defeated the men he could see. 

“Having fun yet?” Victor asked you and James before he ran over to the gate Zero had just opened.

Victor ran to the building and began using his claws to scale it. The team heard a tank arm up nearby.

“Fred?” Stryker called.

“The tank?” Fred wondered.

“The tank.”

“Yeah, I got that.”

Fred came over to the tank and punched his fist into it before the controller fired. The shot hit Fred’s fist before backfiring, exploding the tank. Stryker led the rest of you into the building and onto the elevator. Bradley, Wade, and John were standing in front, near the doors, while Fred, Stryker, James, and yourself were in the back. James made sure that you were in the corner so that he could cover you if needed. The elevator was playing office music before the power was cut and it stopped.

“Great,” Wade said. “Stuck in an elevator with five guys on a high-protein diet and a fiery bitch.”

“Watch it, bud,” James growled.

“Wade,” Stryker warned.

“Dreams really do come true.”

“Just shut it! You’re up next.”

“Thank you, sir. You look really nice today. It’s the green. It brings out the seriousness in your eyes. Though the black really brings out Y/N’s—“

“Oh my God. Do you ever shut up, pal?” James could never stand Wade for long periods of time.

“No. Not when I’m awake.”

“Bradley? Top floor, please,” Stryker requested.

Bradley quickly used his powers to bring the elevator up to the top floor. As soon as the elevator reached the top floor, James pushed you further into the corner and covered you. Stryker moved to stand between you two and Bradley. The doors opened and gunshots immediately followed. Wade twirled his words around, effectively preventing himself from taking a bullet. It wasn’t long until everyone was dead beside the boss at the front desk.

“Okay. People are dead,” Wade announced.

“If you didn’t have that mouth on you, Wade, you’d be the perfect soldier,” Stryker stated as he walked out of the elevator and toward the sole survivor. 

James made sure that you were at his side, always ready to jump in to protect you at a moment’s notice. The sole survivor reached for a gun from under his desk but John teleported, quickly stopping him.

“I wouldn’t do that if I was you, brother,” John warned.

“Take the diamonds,” the man said. “They’re yours.”

“I don’t want your diamonds,” replied Stryker. “I want this.” He took a piece of rock that was sitting on the man’s desk.

“But that is nothing. A souvenir.”

“Where did you find it? I want the source.”

“A small village, far inland, three days from here.”

~~~

Mere hours later, the team was in that small village. The villagers had been gathered up, kept close together by a ring of fire you were controlling. Stryker was holding up the stolen rock to the village leader while Wade was there translating.

“I don’t like this,” James muttered to you. The heat you had created had forced him to take off his shirt, leaving his white tank top.

“Me either,” you responded. You glanced around as Wade and Stryker talked to the village leader. The villagers were all terrified and you hated that you were a part of that.

“He’s telling the truth,” James tried to vouch for the leader.

“You don’t know the language, Logan,” Stryker dismissed.

“It’s a meteor fragment.”

“I know what it is. I’m asking him where he found it.”

“Sir,” Bradley called, “base wants to know our location.”

“Shut them down.”

“Yes.”

Stryker leaned toward the kneeling leader. “Tell him everyone here will die unless he tells me where he the found rock.”

Wade quickly translated and received a response. “He says that it’s sacred.”

“Okay, fine,” Stryker stood up straight and turned to Victor. “Victor.” He placed a hand on the mutant’s shoulder before walking a few steps away, keeping his back to everyone.

Victor quickly killed the reader, causing the villagers to cry out. You extinguished the circle of flames as the other members of the team began killing the villagers. You stumbled back at the sight forcing James to steady you. In all your time with this team, you had never gone after innocents. James ran towards Victor grabbing his wrist before he could kill another innocent man.

“Victor!” James roared. “Don’t even think about it.” You noticed that your other teammates gripped their weapons tighter, prepared to fight each other. “We didn’t sign up for this. Put him down.”

Victor let go of the villager as he ripped his wrist from James’ grip. “What are you doing?” Victor questioned through panting breaths. “We finally got a good thing going here. Don’t you screw this up.”

“Enough. That’s enough. We’ve done enough.”

“Who do you think you are? This is what we do. Maybe you’d rather be rotting in a hole somewhere till they figure out a way to do it to us. Is that it? Huh?”

“I’m done. You coming?” When Victor didn’t give an immediate answer. James turned and walked to you. “Y/N. Come with me.”

“I—I can’t,” you were terrified of losing the comfort you had found.

“I promise that you will have a bed and food and clothes. I will take care of you.”

“Don’t do it, Y/N,” Stryker said, taking a step forward. “He can’t make those promises. You’ll be back on the streets.”

“I will never let that happen.” He held out his hand. “Come with me.”

You briefly looked past James to see Stryker angrily staring you down before you focused back on James. With a shaky hand, you reached out and took James’. He squeezed it before he began leading you away.

“Jimmy!” Victor yelled, causing James to stop and turn. “We can’t just let you two walk away.” James ripped off his dog tags before throwing them to the ground, you quickly did the same.

James made sure he had a good grip on your hand before the two of you disappeared into the forest, Victor calling after James. 

next chapter >

[marlynnofmany]

Singing the Approach

“You’re coming on this delivery,” Zhee told me with a flick of his antennae. “We have to make noises as we walk up.”

“What kind of noises?” I asked, accepting the tablet he held out. 

“There’s a sound file.” He angled his head away, but with eyes that big, he was still looking at me. “I’m not going to try to copy it. That’s on you.”

I opened the briefing for our newest clients, which included a rundown on their species and a sound file for a standard greeting. Well, standard for an offworld courier delivering something they’d ordered. Apparently there were many types of greetings. I played the top one, and it sounded like whale song. 

I looked at Zhee. “Sure we can’t just play this really loud?”

Zhee angled his antennae into a no. “Captain says they’ll like us better if it’s an actual voice. Are your human voice-bits up to that?”

“Yeah, shouldn’t be too hard.” I cleared my throat and gave it a shot. It sounded like a childish imitation to me, but a subtle twitch of Zhee’s antennae suggested he was pretending not to be impressed. 

“Good enough,” he said. “I’m going because I’ll need to open the crates before they accept them.” He flexed a pincher arm, purple exoskeleton shining. “You get to do the talking.”

“They speak Doorway, right?” I asked, looking through the file. “If it’s one of the more obscure trade languages, we may want to bring Coals or Trrili along.”

“Yes, Doorway continues to open many doors,” Zhee said with an aggravated sigh (his favorite kind). He was probably grumpy that a language from his own species hadn’t taken off like this one had. But not every race was up to the intricacies of that many different hisses. And the Heatseekers had crafted Doorway with interplanetary communication in mind, a level of cooperation that would have surprised me coming from Mesmer society as a whole.

“I heard my name,” said a voice from hip height.

“Hey, Coals,” I said to our shortest and most patient crewmate. “I was just wondering if the delivery will need your translation skills, but it sounds like not.” I angled the tablet so he could see.

He gave it a look then nodded, scaly face as calm as ever. “Oh, those folks. I wonder if there was ever a consensus on whether their own name for themselves translates as ‘Ground-grabbers’ or ‘Ground-huggers.’ They do embrace each other with their grabbing arms, so last I heard, it was hard to say.”

The customer was listed on the tablet as a “Ground-grabber.” It was kind of a silly name to my way of thinking, but I’d heard worse. I said, “It probably won’t come up in conversation if we just stick to business.”

“Keep an eye out for the Tree-grabbers,” Coals said. “They live nearby but higher up. And the things barely count as trees, but it’s the best we could do.”

“Right,” I said. I wanted to ask more, but the intercom chimed with the “about to land” noise. We all took our positions: I followed Zhee to the cargo hold and Coals continued on to whatever he’d been doing.

While I waited for the ship to land, I entertained myself with the realization that the species names could also be translated as “landlubbers” and “treehuggers.”

The view when the door finally opened was of a blue-skied desert scrubland, with a town made of sturdy one-floor buildings constructed out of dusty red clay blocks.

Coals would have blended right in, I thought as I helped maneuver the hoversled down the ramp. That might have been a problem, actually. The briefing had been clear that the Ground-grabbers had poorer eyesight than average, which was why the polite thing to do was to herald your arrival.

Speaking of which… I cleared my throat again and sang my best whale song while Zhee and I towed the package toward the three large figures walking toward us. Not for the first time, I was very glad for the captain and the pilots watching from the cockpit, who would let us know if there was a problem. They’d already gotten permission to land, and talked with someone who was sending out the right people to meet us.

People who looked an awful lot like rhinos with a creepy set of extra arms reaching out from their backs — long-fingered like they were meant to be wings, but had gotten sidetracked on the evolutionary path.

Right. Ground-grabbers.

They sang more whale song back, then to my relief, greeted us in Doorway. The conversation went smoothly. I described everything that we were bringing them — exactly what they’d ordered, packaged at an offworld store — and Zhee easily cranked open the lids for inspection.

The exotic food that they’d ordered was extremely sour fruit with a smell that made my eyes water. I would have worried about looking unprofessional for a moment there, but I was pretty sure they didn’t notice the face I made before wiping my eyes.

After they did some sniffing, and some careful fondling with the grabber arms, they declared the items acceptable and had Zhee put the lids back on. While the Ground-grabber in front was signing the payment tablet, I caught motion from the corner of my eye. I turned to look and I heard something like whale song, just higher-pitched.

Oh, I thought. So these are the Tree-grabbers. They scampered across the dusty ground like long-limbed monkeys, pausing every so often to look around for danger, in the manner of prey animals everywhere. They had big eyes and mousy ears, plus tiny little horn nubbins on their noses. Their top set of arms looked much like the lower ones, probably very useful for climbing the giant cactus-things in the distance.

I had a theory about the evolution of these two species.

The landlubbers turned to greet the treehuggers in a moment of beautiful music, with both groups singing together. Then it devolved into conversation that I couldn’t follow, since they weren’t bothering with Doorway now. But soon they turned to address me.

The Ground-grabber still holding the tablet asked me in her deep voice, “How long would it take for you to bring this same amount for them?” The Tree-grabbers hopped in barely restrained excitement.

“Let me check with the captain,” I said, glancing at Zhee. I took out my phone and called back to the ship, stepping away while he finalized the payment for the first delivery.

Captain Sunlight had of course been watching from the cockpit, and already had an answer for me. I relayed it to the Tree-grabbers, who thought it sounded fantastic, and the captain said she’d be right out to negotiate.

The bravest Tree-grabber asked, “Can your airwing land closer to our home?” He pointed a long arm toward the cactuses, which I now realized had tiny figures climbing the many spikes and branches, along with dark spots that looked like doors. “There is a section of high ground. We can meet there. We’d never ask an offworlder to climb.”

Zhee hissed a laugh. “This one might like the chance.” He pointed an elbow at me.

“Well,” I said. “It might be a bit of a challenge with this many crates.”

The Tree-grabber wiggled his ears like a cartoon mouse. “Oh? Maybe afterward?”

“I mean…” I looked at Zhee. “I wouldn’t say no to a quick visit.” Zhee was quietly laughing at me, which wasn’t a surprise.

“Excellent!” the Tree-grabber said.

The Ground-grabbers moved to unload the sled. “Don’t let the Air-grabbers catch the scent of it,” said the lead one.

This was news. “Air-grabbers?” I asked.

The big rhino’s arms were busy with the crates (and Zhee’s help), but the little monkey-mouse pointed behind our ship. I hadn’t really looked in that direction yet, and I found a flat mountaintop back there holding what might have been another city. And the sides were speckled with possible windows.

“They live up high, but they’re always down here pestering everyone else,” said the monkey-mouse.

“Nobody likes an Air-grabber,” rumbled the rhino, balancing a crate on her back. “They never herald their approach, and they come from above!”

“So rude,” agreed the Tree-grabber. “They think any door that’s open is an invitation, just because they can fly right to it. They would probably make you deliver to the side of their cliffs. Those are much harder to climb than trees!”

Zhee gave me a look.

“Well. Especially with the crates.”

The monkey-mouse looked shocked. “Really? Your people climb things like that?”

Zhee answered before I could. “Humans climb anything they can, and a few things they can’t. Plus they wear ‘wing-suits’ sometimes that lets them glide on artificial wings.”

I asked him, “When did I tell you about wingsuits?”

He spread his mandibles in a grin. “I looked it up after you climbed on top of that other ship at the spaceport.”

“Hey, that wasn’t my idea; she needed help with maintenance up there.”

“And you didn’t see anyone else volunteering without an antigrav pack.”

“Oh!” said the Tree-grabber. “Do you have a source for those? Some of our elders could really use them.”

“Let’s ask the captain,” I said with a look toward the ship. Captain Sunlight and Paint were heading toward us, two lizardy figures with a recording of whale song, since their vocal cords weren’t quite up to human-level mimicry. “I’m pretty sure there was a store that sold them at the same spaceport as these fruits. And yes—” I said to Zhee, “It was run by humans.”

~~~

These are the ongoing backstory adventures of the main character from this book.

Shared early on Patreon! There’s even a free tier to get them on the same day as the rest of the world.

The sequel novel is in progress (and will include characters from these stories. I hadn’t thought all of them up when I wrote the first book, but they’re too much fun to leave out of the second).

[imaginative-123]

Why Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss have a Misandry Issue Part 1

A part of me questions myself if I have to make this post, but then I decided in my free time I finally let go of my doubts and have finally decided to make this post, bec deep inside I wanted to be honest with both of these shows how it depicts men including men who are part of the LGBTQ spectrum, the post will be me going in depth of the creator's shows, that includes the analysis and criticisms of Vivziepop's work.

TRIGGER WARNING:

This post will contain Sexual Assault, Sexual Harassment, R@pe, Power Dynamics/ Power Imbalance, Misogyny and Misandry.

If you are uncomfortable with this topic that I'm going to discuss, you can choose not to continue reading this post however if you are willing to continue regardless of the contents and sensitive topics that I'm going to discuss, please proceed with caution.

So first let's talk about Misandry, since this term isn't as well known as Misogyny, Misandry's definition is the dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against men (i.e. the male sex). However Misandry is a term I didn't recognize being used until this year when I found on Reddit that there are few posts and comments talking about it compared to Misogyny, and it surprised me why isn't this term isn't as talked about but then in my experience on Twitter and Reddit that there are certain subreddits and other comments denying that "Misandry doesn't exist."

To which I disagree while yes I'm a woman, I do see and experience Misogyny in online spaces including in real world and other women face thru issues like sexism, physical and emotional abuse from other men, r@pe, sexual harassment and etc., that still doesn't excuse being biased and ignore what men faced thru in real life, there are stories I've seen from other men who were drugged and also being physically abused by their ex girlfriend or other women, r@ped and sexually abused by the older woman or in this case an older man, I've seen a video before of a guy singing on stage only to get groped on his dick by a woman and she laughed at him and at the end he was shocked and left the stage from embarrassment, falsely being accused of sexual assault, toxic yaoi fangirls sexually harassing gay or straight men of who's the top and bottom, little boys being molested or raped by older people, families and that includes male and female teachers, telling Men to stop crying bec Boys can't cry, there is also a Twitter post from a woman wishing Male Suicide rates go up, there are few Twitter posts from Women wishing to abort male babies from existing, ignoring Male SA Victims and laugh at their experience bec they got "lucky" and wish they got into their place, Media that makes jokes about Male SA and etc., seeing these stories from men who experience that really made me feel sorry for them and I don't think they deserved that. Plus, this isn't me discrediting female victims I do also support them including male victims, in regards to r@pe just bec it happens to women it can also happen to men including people on the LGBTQ community and nobody deserved to be r@ped, I'm not an SA Survivor, but I'm so glad I didn't experienced it bec of how traumatizing and horrifying r@pe is, and also a comment earlier I've seen on Reddit is that Women and children r@ped and died from the hands of men, yes I'm not denying it definitely exists but doesn't mean we can ignore that it can happen to men including little boys in the hands of their abusers and murderers. Also my brother was physically abused by my father and my sister had to witnessed the abuse on front of her, my Mom and Dad were always fighting personal problems and I was also physically abused by my father before my parents separated and it took me years for my father to changed as a person before he died in Sept 5, 2016 due to Stroke. Plus this year is his death anniversary, I understand if there are children who can't forgive their abusive parent but for me my father proved to me that he can change as a person and I have already have forgiven him before he died.

The main reason why I want to discuss Misandry bec it relates to Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss while I can see many posts discussing how poorly the main female characters are handled by Vivziepop and I completely understand why the critical community have issues with that, the issues that happened with the male characters in regards to Misandry have few posts which is why I want to tackle it.

The next topic I want to tackle is the MLM or Gay Representation in the show Helluva Boss bec this also the main reason why I made this post.

Vivziepop and her crew loved to boast and pride about their Queer Representation but as someone who watched the show, as a bisexual woman myself, the Queer Representation is just as shallow and a mixed bag to be honest, the reason for that is Viv's depiction of gay men is not only misandrist but also sexist on how they were depicted. But before we deep dive to the male gay characters on how they were depicted I wanted to focus on the term that is mostly being used on fictional gay relationships that is Yaoi. Yaoi is a Japanese term for manga that features sexual romance between men, specifically as created by and for women. In the West, yaoi is used more generally to refer to any anime, manga, fan fiction, that focuses on romance between men. Although to be fair, Yaoi from what I've seen can also be consumed by gay men, the main reason I brought up Yaoi is that because Viv's shows are being accused of stereotypes about gay men such as fetishization of r@pe, power imbalance, sexual harassment and etc. That's because Yaoi is a very controversial subject in the community where there are gay people who are split about the depictions of gay men in Yaoi and BL's, there are gay men who dislike the fetishization and that it only appeals to women but there are others who defend it as just fiction.

For me personally I don't think there's an issue with consuming Yaoi or BL's and I'm not saying women can't enjoy it, but as someone who is desensitized to the stereotypes that BL I consumed in my earlier teen years I can't just ignore the real issue, bec back then I used to be a proshipper, I used to defend artists who were being sent death threats and harassments from antis and I used to defend problematic fiction and ships and I always go thru arguments with people who don't like it, I was offensive and also not mentally well in the past but as of this year I no longer support Proshipping since I do not stand by that including my not so great behavior from the past, but that doesn't mean I will not stoop down to the same level of antis that will harass or threaten proshippers and I don't accept that. However just bec it's fiction argument, it still needs to be criticized for valid reasons, and also just bec Yaoi have stereotypes does this mean the entire genre is like this? No, there are other stories who don't fall into the same problematic stereotypes, but still sadly, Yaoi and BL is still controversial for continuing it's stereotypical depiction of gay men and it's also mostly present in Webtoons and Manhwas.

When I revisited GoatJesus' video about Examining the Yaoi ★ BL Genre where he as a gay man analyzes but also criticize Yaoi's depiction of men but also praises other shows for straying away from stereotypes and there are certain parts of the video that stood out to me that I will put here where GoatJesus talks about the main points about Yaoi. To which I edited 2 clips into 1 video.

Regarding the women who write BL or Yaoi's, I'm not against women who write that specific genre, nor I'm mysogynistic that women have no freedom to write stories, and I do believe that not many female authors fall into writing stereotypes about gay men, however this does not mean that I can't just ignore that other women and other most popular female writers who still write harmful views onto gay men and this comment under GoatJesus video sums up my main issues from that online article that was being discussed.

The reason it's related to Vivziepop, bec Viv herself a female writer still falls into writing stereotypes about gay men and I will finally discuss on the subject of Helluva Boss first before Hazbin Hotel. The first characters we will going to tackle is Blitz, the main character and founder of IMP, and he himself is also confirmed to be Pansexual.

I'll be completely honest, Blitz is an interesting character, he himself have relationship problems of his insecurities getting in his way and mostly the mistakes that he made to people whom he used to be closed with, and he usually acts as confident and arrogant and badass on the outside but deep inside he had issues, but the way the show tackles jokes that Blitz made is really uncomfortable most especially in Season 1 where he made rape threats to Moxxie and his wife Millie.

That next episodes includes making demeaning jokes to Moxxie and let's not forget sexual harassment and invading space of the Imp couple.

The biggest problem is that Blitz up until Apology Tour had never tried to apologize for making Moxxie uncomfortable and invading him and his wife's personal space, while yes it is true that Blitz himself craves for a healthy relationship that he sees in them that doesn't excuse his past actions. This is not only the issue I see in Blitz's character this is also how other characters also treat him like dirt. Let's start with Loona, Blitz was a caring but also overprotective of Loona bec he himself first discovered Loona at the adoption center for Hellhounds where he saw Loona fending herself against a male hellhound who tried to hurt her and she herself was alone and crying about how depressing her situation was, which thankfully Blitz with good intentions did finally adopted her and became her dad, throughout S1 Loona herself was like any other emo goth girl but for Blitz regardless of Loona's personality still loved her, this however changed in Spring Broken where Loona developed a crush on Vortex and that's where Blitz developed his overprotective tendencies to which when they got in the human world where Loona tried to start a conversation with Vortex until Blitz interrupted them bec he wanted to focus on the main goal of getting back their parking space from Verosika and that's where they both started arguing bec Loona thinks Blitz can't leave her alone and she told him he's not her real dad and she herself views as an adult, Blitz cannot control his overprotective tendencies and Loona tells Blitz she doesn't need him. Loona later tries to apologize but Blitz cuts her off and tells her to enjoy her break while he continues finishing his job, although after Millie defeats the fish monster they both came back in the human world, in Truth Seeker, Loona and Millie where willing to rescue the boys who were left in the human world and being abducted by the Dhorks and Loona was willing to help her team defeat the members of the Dhorks and Loona was given a kiss in the cheek by Blitz and he was proud of her for helping IMP to which she was embarrassed but still continues fighting. The episode that stood out to me is Queen Bee which is the last segment where Loona takes care of the drunk Blitz and was willing to let him rest after Blitz tells her his insecurities of his fear of dying but Loona reassures him she will be there for him.

You know maybe Loona wasn't that bad to Blitz right? Right? Wrong, in the past I used to liked Seeing Stars bec of Loona and Octavia's relationship develop like sisters, yet this however doesn't excuse the problem on how Loona treats Blitz as she's suddenly violent and being abusive to Blitz for no reason like Blitz regardless of me not excusing how he treated Moxxie, but I don't recall him sexually harassing Loona nor talking about her body, all I remember is him trying to be a good dad to Loona yet somehow he's in the wrong for wanting Loona to be better and yet at the end get kicked in the nuts for no reason despite Blitz wanting to apologize to her because?

"HAHAHA! IT'S GIRLBOSS, AND FEMINIST TO KICK MEN IN THE NUTS FOR NO REASON OTHER THAN COMEDY! PLEASE LAUGH!!!"

That's not funny, that's insulting and it definitely regressed the development of Loona and Blitz father and daughter relationship in the first season. Loona however just like Blitz had never apologized for treating people in the wrong and the show somehow forgot about it and it just went back to normal. So anyways let's talk about Stolas, Stolas is by far one of the most controversial characters in the show bec there are people being split about his character, there are fans who loved him but there are haters who truly hated him, bec there are reasons the critical space is not fond or welcome of him, that's bec he has the power in the relationship bec he and Blitz were in a transactional relationship where Blitz is required to have sex with Stolas so that he can still borrow the Grimoire book to the human world for his business of killing people. The Reason there is a Power Imbalance comes from the fact that Blitz an Imp that is a lower class demon and Stolas is from the Goetia a higher class demon above imps and not only Goetias are also racists and looked down upon Imps with the exception of Octavia. This is the common trope that you may see in problematic relationships that also includes transactional relationships in Yaoi and BL's where the Seme has the power and masculinity in the relationship while the Uke is lower and have no agency of his free will and this is the equivalent of a heternomative stereotypes that is placed upon 2 men, while there are people who analyzed Yaoi said that it have Misogynistic tropes bec of hetenormative roles places upon men, I'd say in my opinion it's more Misandrist bec it doesn't view men in an actual gay relationship but in a lens of a straight person on how they view gay men. This is however in Helluva Boss the roles are reversed since Blitz is the top while Stolas is the power bottom, but let's be real if Stolas a Rich Goetia is the Top and have power in the relationship while Blitz is the bottom in lower class it would be much more controversial and people would see it more as sexual coercion. But bec the roles are reversed and why there are fans of the ship don't view it as toxic bec Stolas a gay bottom man was babyfied by the narrative that can't do wrong in the relationship and that Stolitz is just a misunderstanding of bad communication in a relationship when if anyone with critical lens would look deeper and see the relationship as problematic and there is a power imbalance in their relationship yet I found out that one of the fans of HB said that Stolitz is meant to be endgame by Viv, and I was like did Viv see nothing wrong in their relationship? The relationship was built from transaction, including Stolas sexually harassing Blitz in front of his daughter, was the result of cheating from his wife Stella as to why she was rightfully upset at her husband and it was retconned in Season 2 to make her a cartoonish villain with no depth compared to Stolas, and they were supposed to be canon at end? No thank you, Ma'am, Blitz deserved a better partner than Stolas or hell he could've fixed his relationship with Verosika since I found their relationship more interesting than Stolitz, yet Blitz was the one who should apologize to Stolas instead of Stolas taking accountability and not apologizing for looking down on him, sexually harassing him and having the power in the relationship. It's just frustrating to watch that not only diminishes the YT views of S2 compared to S1 but the relationship overtakes the premise of the show about assassination. Doesn't help the fact the show has the will they don't they kind of relationship where the show finds Stolitz to be romantic but also not romantic at the same just like how Viv and her writing staff view them.

Now let's talk about Chaz, he's the character I truly hate on my first viewing of him last year when the episode was released, he's the embodiment of everything wrong with Helluva Boss with it's overused of sex jokes relating to male genitalia or dick jokes and sexual harassment, the guy was just only part of Crimson's Mafia and being both Moxxie and Millie's ex boyfriend. His only character was just being annoying, talks about how sexy he was, his dick, sexually harassing Moxxie and annoying Millie and we don't exactly know why they break up, and his music theme is annoying to listen to. It's even worse that he's Pansexual and just like the main male characters in the show where they nonstop talk about their genitalia like Blitz, I'm serious what's the purpose of his character anyway? He almost serves no purpose to the narrative unless it was just him marrying Moxxie so he can get into Crimson's wealth. I'll be completely honest I'm glad he died, I felt so frustrated to watch him, and unfortunately he had a cult fanbase dedicated to him and there are others like me who don't like him either. I feel like I'm questioning Viv's view on gay men is disturbing to be honest.

Lastly, I wanna talk about Moxxie, my dear poor bisexual Moxxie, he was the character who was the the victim of sexual harassment, the butt of jokes, being humiliated for being in a healthy relationship with Millie that is being set in Hell. I do feel bad for how he was treated by the narrative that involves around SA, the show constantly makes jokes about Moxxie being SA by Verosika and her crew including Chaz and Blitz,

Doesn't help the fact in which he was forced to marry Chaz when he's also forced to wear a Wedding Dress against his will and was being tied up and turned to a damsel in distress for Millie to saved him, I'll be completely honest, I have no issues with Moxxie being Bisexual, the issue comes from the fact that the female and male characters humiliate and SA him and was being forced to a feminine role against his will, it's one thing if a gay man wants to express freely his sexuality and I have no issue with that, men can express being gay and not be shamed for it. The issue was that Moxxie was being forced against his will and it was irritating to see him like that, the last time the show never humiliates him is when he licks Blitz Asmodeus crystal to help him to activate and go back to the human realm bec Blitz conveniently can't activate it himself. However this does not excuse how the past episodes treat him.

This is the post I will make for Helluva Boss bec I have to rest and I will make a second post about Hazbin Hotel when I have time since there's a lot of stuff to unpack in another post. Just a reminder, this post I made have no bad intentions towards Vivziepop and her staff, this is just me a Bisexual Woman who consumes BL who was also being critical of the genre that I'm consuming and giving my personal and honest thoughts of Viv's depiction of her Gay men in her shows. Just a reminder if you want to comment on my post that's fine but I do not accept bigotry and homophobia, bec I might as well block you, all I want is a personal discussion of the gay representations being represented in the show. Thank you and Goodnight.

Edit: I just found out that there is a minor retweeted my post while I do understand that they are also critical of the show however my account says Minors do Not Interact since my post also tackles adult themes that is not suitable for minors and also I personally disagree with their views on Lucifer but regardless, if a minor sees this post please do not interact. Bec I might as well block you, I don't think an adult like me should be discussing adult stuff in front of minors in online spaces.

[starringthesturniolos]

bite me(part 5) matt sturniolo

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5

summary: matt hates your guts but all of that changes when he wakes up and finds out your his mate.

contains: vampire!matt x reader, highschool au! (18 years old), dark themes, death, smut (not in this part)

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matts pov.

"okay, you guys should feel different any minute now" Madi says before giving me a look. a look that says what I am doing is stupid. judging by the sadness that's roaming in my chest, I'm guessing y/n thinks its stupid too. why does she care, its not like she likes me, I think to myself. but even as I think it, I can't help but cringe at the loss of emotions I would have from getting rid of the bond. sure, it was annoying sometimes, but hell, Iife gets a little boring when you've been living for so long. its easy to go numb and become desensitized, and that's what made y/n an anomaly. even before the mating bond, she made me feel things. even things I didn't want to feel like annoyance and anger.

I look over at her and I can't help but stare. she's so pretty, I think even as the bond fades into a dull nothing.

"quite staring, your freaking me out" she says looking at me. I can see the tears in her eyes, and ,even though the bonds gone, I know she wishes there weren't any. I knew her and I knew that she didn't like to feel like others had power to make her sad or upset. she never wanted to lose control. I can't help but note how much I know about her. more than I thought I knew.

I look away and grab her arm and sigh at the fact that there are no tingles or heat that flash through me this time. "I'll take you home, it's been a long night." and so from there we head back to the car. shit, I almost forgot about chris. I open my phone to call him, but I see a text notification from him instead. "I'm going to stay, the spell could take all night for me" it says. I can't help but wonder how someone can take away the pain of losing a mate, but shrug it off. if I knew I'd be a magic user, not a vampire. and I wouldn't be standing here awkwardly with a girl I hated two days ago. a girl I wish I could comfort, but don't know how too. we climb in the van and I turn on the car. the hiss of the ac and the quiet hum of the radio are the only sounds in the car. she opens her mouth and closes it again. "what? what is it?" i sigh because the tension is killing me.

"if the bond is gone then why am I still sad?" she says quietly. I note the fact that this is the most vulnerable I've ever seen her. she's always had a strong front, and always had something smart to say. but now in the quiet that is my van, I feel like I see her, the real her.

"I don't know why." I say honestly, but cringe at the monotone way I say it. like I didn't care to know why she was upset, and right then I knew her walls were going to come back up before they even do. she shrugs and wipes her face once. "can I play music then, I don't like moping around." she sighs, grounding herself again. "I know you don't" I say softly "and yes you can, as long as you don't have shit music taste" I smirk at the end. teasing her is so much easier and more natural then whatever we've been doing the past 15 minutes. "Oh it's amazing, you're gonna wanna add my songs to your playlist when I'm done. " she takes the mood change and runs with it. she even laughs and I don't even try to stop myself from admiring her smile.

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I pull into her house and all the lights are on and there are clanging noises coming from the inside of her home. its damn near 5 am and no one should be up that early on a Sunday morning. we were just having a good time, surprisingly, listening to music with each other. we both like the same kind of music and even though I acted like I hated her singing I didn't mind. but she wasn't singing now, she actually looked really scared.

"my dads home" she whispers and looks at me with wide glossy eyes. worry flutters in my chest at the sight of her being afraid. this guy must be bad news. "he rarely ever comes home" she says in the same quiet tone her eyes widening even further before she turns to me. "I thought Madi said she put a protection spell on me." she runs her hands through her hair and her breathing is picking up. if she keeps this up, she's going to have a panic attack.

" she did, okay, so you have nothing to worry about!" the words sound all wrong coming out of my mouth. I meant for them to come out comforting but instead they sound a bit like I just want her to shut up and get out of my car. why do I always have to sound so mean.

her breathing picks up more and she's crying now. "you don't know what he's like, matt! you've never met the guy. he doesn't want anything to do with me! and when he comes home, he's always drunk" she pauses and closes her eyes gasping for breath. "and he's mean!" she sobs. before I can stop myself I grab her face and guide her gaze away from the house to me. if she hadn't told me this, I would have never known she'd been hurt this way. I couldn't help but wonder how many times she came home to find a nightmare in her house.

"you don't have to be with that guy" I say slowly and nod my head before continuing

"just stay with me" I whisper.

@bbernard-03

@sturnthepot

@hoeformatt

@sturtriple16

@faygo-frog

@sturniol0s

@katie-tibo

@cindylcuwho

[wen-kexing-apologist]

Can I ask, why do you love BL romance better than het romance? What makes them better? I did not mean anything negative, and I know everyone have their own like and dislike but I want to know your thoughts....

Also what do you think that made Asian MLM (BL manga/manhwa/manhua/tv series/movies) romances better than western MLM romances?

Hello! Yes you are more than welcome to ask :) I truly, truly love getting asks in my inbox and have been having so much fun with the fact I’ve actually been getting some recently! Warning this is long (but i have TL;DRs for everything)

___

I think the fastest answer for me is that I am queer, and therefore I find I have a lot more enjoyment and interest in watching queer stories compared to heterosexual ones.

Also, I find a lot of heterosexual romances to be steeped in misogyny, and have low-key or high-key abusive dynamics. And again, do not get me wrong, there are plenty of queer shows where there are abusive dynamics in play, but it is much harder for misogyny to be committed between two men than it is for misogyny to be placed on a male/female pairing. (I love GLs cause, you know…women, but there are a lot more complex dynamics going in to stories written about two women and those can get much trickier for me, and unfortunately many narratives love punishing lesbains with death so.... Anyway, I’m trying to stick mostly to BLs since that is primarily what this ask is about.)

Additionally, I love BLs more than heterosexual romances because of how BLs treat men. Men in heterosexual romances, especially in the West are extremely masculine, often unable to be in touch with their emotions, jaded, misogynistic, they have to be extremely muscular, and we almost never see femme boys or men.

BLs have such a vast range of men, they have twinks, they have femmes, they have gym bros. They have the clowns, and the super masculine boys. There are shows that let boys be boys, be stupid, and stinky, and fucking gross (hey Pat from Bad Buddy), they let boys be angry and aggressive and express their emotions that way (Sean and Yok’s fight in Not Me, Han Baram and Im Hantae’s conversation in the boxing ring in Sing My Crush, Lom and Nuea in The Wedding Plan, Patts in La Pluie), they let boys fight and wrestle and play (Bad Buddy, My School President, Moonlight Chicken, Only Friends). I love queer stories that let men be gay and ensure through the story that that never undermines their masculinity. I love that there are shows that focus on the progress older men can make in their relationships (What Did You Eat Yesterday?) THEY ARE ALSO ALLOWED TO CRY!!!!

And though it is still kind of rare, Asian BLs actually do have femme boys, and while I am sure femme boys exist in Western shows, I think Pose and fucking Glee are like…the only two shows with queer people that I have seen in the last decade that have an femme boy representation at all. On the flip side, I love how often GMMTV puts their boys in drag and that doesn’t even have to be in a queer show. I also generally love the fact that most of the male actors in Asian BLs, and again, especially in Thailand embrace their femme sides in photoshoots and whatnot, that they wear earrings, and jewelry, and makeup and they look hot as fuck, because it helps me with my own gender identity. I feel and see myself much more masculine (and have less dysphoria) when I have an earring or a necklace or makeup on, now that I have seen so many boys do the same. 

TL;DR: I am queer, and heterosexual romances are frequently misogynistic, and men are extremely masculine and rarely allowed to be soft. Asian BLs give us a very broad range of masculinity, but often let boys be boys while also kissing boys. And actors embracing their femme sides helps me feel more masculine when I lean in to my femme side.

___

As for Asian MLM romances compared to Western MLM romances, obviously this is not a cut and dry thing, not all Asian BLs are going to be better than Western BLs but I find I have a tendency to enjoy Asian BLs/queer media more for a few reasons, generally in order of most to least important for me:

Reason One- Family

This may seem somewhat surprising because the first, and honestly biggest reason I tend to like Asian BLs more than Western BLs has much less to do with the queer aspect. It's actually the family dynamics. I think Western media very frequently has a tendency to be very binary in their portrayal of family dynamics, if family is at all included in Western narratives the relationships that characters have to their family is either almost wholly good, or almost wholly bad. You either have a very abusive household that a character is trying to avoid or flee, or you have a traditional, happy, nuclear family, and when characters have a strained relationship to their family, I have noticed a lot more narrative support for leaving that family behind. But for the most part, family does not play a huge role in most Western shows (and, wild concept to me, it’s part of why I think shows like Succession are so successful, because that is all about complex, fucked up, and loving relationships within a family). 

Whereas, in Asian media, far more frequently family and family dynamics play a huge role in the character’s lives, behaviors, and can influence the story. And because filial piety is such an important aspect to many Asian cultures, you get a lot more interesting parent/child relationships out of Asian media than you do with Western content. And I am a white Westerner, but I am fundamentally, culturally a Southerner and despite no longer being a woman, I will never shed the mantle of Eldest Daughter. And that has resulted in a sense of family responsibility and piety that ends up making it very very easy for me to understand the motivations of the characters that remain loyal to their family even when their family is asking for things from them that run counter to their own desires or happiness (I’ve actually had this conversation a lot with @waitmyturtles about the intersections of Southern culture and Asian culture).

And similarly, I find that a lot of Western media with queer characters at least in the time frame that I have been able to find content with queer characters is either wholly homophobic, or wholly accepting. And do not get me wrong, we get family dynamics like that in Asian BLs too, but we also get parents who are upset about their child’s queerness, and will voice that, and yet who still take care of their children. I’m thinking of the film I watched just the other day called Margarita with a Straw where the main character’s mother can barely look or talk to her daughter when she comes out, but because she is disabled, her mother is still there preparing food for her, bathing her, etc. because even if she is upset about her child’s queerness she can’t stop taking care of her. And those aren’t dynamics I often see in Western media. 

I don’t see relationships like Sawismol and Wang in Western media, where a mother can look at her child and say, out loud that she is disappointed, and to be upset, and to still, despite everything, be the person that her son goes to for comfort when he is absolutely devastated, and I don’t see Western parents sitting there and performing that comfort even when they are disappointed in their children’s queerness.

TL;DR: Family dynamics feel a lot more built out, realistic, and complex in many Asian BLs/media that I’ve seen, than they do in many Western shows. Until I started watching Asian media, I had not seen the dynamics I have with my mother or my father played out on screen. 

Reason Two- Casual Trans Inclusion 

And, as a trans person myself, part of what makes Asian BL shows, Thai shows much more specifically, so important, interesting, and influential to me when compared to Western BLs is the casual inclusion of trans people. Like, that is just something Western media is barely ready for. It’s not non-existent. We have and have had shows like The Fosters, Sense8, Pose, The Owl House, and Heartstopper that have some trans rep. But a lot of those shows have a hefty component to them that shows the struggles of being trans.

In The Fosters we have to watch Cole nearly die trying to get his hands on testosterone, in Sense8 we have to watch Nomi be kept as a medical prisoner and stripped of her autonomy and almost lobotomized, in Pose we are constantly exposed to the very real dangers that trans women of color experience including murder, in Heartstopper we are spared from having to witness the transphobia Elle went through, but it is mentioned. I think the only one of these shows that doesn’t have some element of struggle because a character is trans is The Owl House and let us not forget that Raine Whispers goes through fucking hell in that show. And these conversations, and the demonstrations of struggle to just survive and thrive despite that is vitally important in a society that is pushing closer and closer towards genocide against trans people. Stories that show the struggles of trans people exist for the sake of realism but also serve as an attempt to try to garner empathy towards trans people by cisgender viewers. 

Thailand does have stories where a trans character experiences transphobia (3 Will Be Free, The Warp Effect, Secret Crush on You), but they also have so many stories where trans people are literally just vibing. Do you know how revolutionary it was for me when I watched KinnPorsche and saw Yok, and she was happy, and beautiful, and fun, and her entire plot centered around her running that bar, flirting with boys, and playing surrogate mother to Porsche? Or just to see trans women existing, who aren’t even central to the plot, but are just there? (Payu’s secretary at the auto shop is a trans woman, Golf Tanwarin was at the inclusive cafe in The Eclipse, Golf Kittipat had an illustrious career as a music producer in My School President). Like that shit is SO important to me, and I never, never see it in Western media. 

TL;DR: There are many Thai shows especially where trans people just exist, and they have plots that aren’t always centered around them being trans. Which is revolutionary, coming in as a trans Western viewer where the majority of trans rep in Western shows makes me eventually have to watch trans people suffer. 

Reason Three- Passion Projects

The film industry is huge and pervasive in Western culture, and in the US especially, and with that comes big budget projects that stretch out as long as they can squeeze a cent out of a fan base. As a result you get shows that are too long, you get shows that ruin their premise in the last season after five to fifteen years of dragging the shambling corpse of a story along. And again, do not get me wrong, there are plenty plenty of Asian BLs that are cash grabs, that are terrible, where the actors aren’t really in it. But, most BLs in Asia are one season, they get in, they get out, and you forget it if it’s bad, or you hate it forever if it’s objectively bigoted. But the time commitment to terrible pieces is a lot shorter. 

That said, when you have a low budget, and a story you want to tell, it makes my love so much more. Because it means the crew, the writers, the director, and often time the actors are there because they want to be there, because they like the story they are telling, because they have a story they want to tell. It’s part of why I love shows like The Eclipse so much, because that show was made with a budget mainly comprised of pocket lint and hope, because Golf Tanwarin had something they wanted to say.  Most if not all of Aof Nopparnach’s shows give genuinely, inherently queer stories that speak to queer people. Jojo Tichakorn makes pieces that are so full of queer lenses you could never deny the inherent queerness in his shows, even if the story is primarily focused on a straight person/relationship (Mama Gogo). There are so many shows in the Asian BL world where you can just tell that everyone is having fun. LIsten, Fish Upon the Sky is an extremely problematic show, but for me it felt like everyone had a great time goofing off on that set. You can tell EV-ER-Y-BOD-Y in the cast of Mama Gogo  was having the time of their motherfucking lives. 

I also think the West is very self-congratulatory and tends to hold themselves as the standard of televisions and acting, when I am over here watching Asian BLs with some of the strongest acting from young people I have ever seen, and having it be written off because its a) low budget b) gay and c) in another language. Like, when I try to get people in to BL I start with shows like KinnPorsche (which I know drives @bnegiyo mad) cause it has a much higher production value than many other Asian BLs without being prestige and therefore can’t radically alter the perception of what BL is (hello ITSAY/IPYTM and 180 Degrees), Thai BLs especially. And I figure that is the only way to show someone the level of absurdity and camp that comes from a lot of BLs, while also maintaining their interest because it has a higher production value, so that if they end up enjoying that they are more willing to watch the low budget shows. 

TL;DR: Many Asian BLs are pretty low budget, compared to like any Western show, which I find to mean we have more stories in Asian BL that people actually want to tell. (there are still very many shows that people seem to just kinda show up for, or get bored with partway through [looking at you Tee] but.)

Reason Four- Abundance

There are 

So 

Many 

Asian 

BLs 

Here's a fraction of my watch list

I have watched 81 in roughly the last year, and there are so many more on my Plan to Watch list, and there are more coming out all the time. The West has given me like…two, maybe three. And when we do get good queer shows in the West, they are frequently canceled before completion. Especially if they are on Netflix. 

We lost Sense8, fans had to fight for Out Flag Means Death to get renewed, The Owl House got cancelled by Disney after giving their main character a girlfriend, ND Stevenson had to write two ending to She-Ra and fought tooth and fucking nail to get the gay one, Legend of Korra had to save the gay kiss until the end just like She-Ra had to. If you want to get depressed here is a link to an article ‘50 TV shows with Lesbian, Bisexual, and Queer characters cancelled after one season’. Because most Asian BLs are meant to be only one season, we actually get complete stories, rather than ending with unresolved tension, or cliffhangers. 

TL;DR: there is a metric fuck ton of Asian BLs

Reason Five- Sex

The West, especially the US, tends to have a very puritanical view of sex (which makes sense because the Puritans were some of the first colonizers…I mean colonials…to murder everyone and occupy…uh, I mean settle the United States (I would also like to place blame on the Italians and Spanish [hey Columbus] and their Catholicism AND PROTESTANT CALVINISM that also influenced the pervasive societal views of sex and especially gay sex in the United States).  

With ever increasing homophobia and transphobia, so many shows are trying, in my own personal opinion, to garner empathy, sympathy, and acceptance for queer characters by cisgender and/or heterosexual viewers by making their queer characters flat, two-dimensional, virginal, perfect people. But homophobes and transphobes consider holding hands to be just as grotesque and inappropriate as full on porn. With Western, and especially US based, views of sex, many queer characters are sanitized, sex scenes are rare, and if they do exist at all they are usually in shows that have mature ratings. 

That is not the case with Asian BLs. Like, do not get me wrong, there are plenty of pure, virginal, don’t kiss, barely touch BLs out there, but because there are so many BLs, there are also plenty of shows with lots of physical intimacy and multiple make out scenes that aren’t maturely rated, as well as plenty of maturely rated shows that have multiple sex scenes AND CAN INCLUDE KINK WHICH LIKE!!!!! I rarely see in the Western media I’ve watched. Hell, Sense8 is a sexual liberation show that includes multiple orgies, but there is not even a hint of any other kink (besides whatever Dani, Lito, and Hernando have going on).

gif by @radishayuan

Meanwhile, The Warp Effect has fucking puppy play, Bed Friend has pet play, Laws of Attraction which has a couple pretty chaste kisses shows handcuffs to at least imply kink, there’s a ball gag and a fucking leash in Big Dragon, I haven’t seen it but Unforgotten Night has a lot of BDSM themes in it, Rain and Payu have a dom/sub dynamic going on, we have daddy kinks abound, I also haven’t seen this one but I know there is some belt bondage in War of Y. And even if it isn’t shown, kink and bondage specifically are often referenced in passing in shows with sex.

Also, there are very very very few Western shows I have seen that treat sex workers kindly, and Jojo Tichakorn is right there giving us sex workers as main characters multiple times in a row. Taiwan has great physical chemistry, the very few things I have seen from the Phillipines are so fucking queer, Japan even when they aren’t including sex at all have some extremely queer narratives, and when they are including sex? Holy fuck. South Korea is developing, but I have liked what I’ve seen so far, and it’s been fun seeing very rapid progressions in the level of physical intimacy characters are allowed to have, Thailand has been making a name for itself.  

TL;DR: There is a very broad range of physical intimacy in Asian BLs from no sex to lots of sex, but the abundance of content means I am seeing more shows with gay sex in them in like…a month or two, than shows I have seen in the West with gay characters at all in like…the past year. (This is of course, subjective, don’t ask me for real numbers). 

And, you know, in case this response wasn’t long enough, the amount of queer content, the types of stories being told, the rapid and continued development of BL is super interesting to observe in its own right. Sure, it may be driven by marketability and sales, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t some truly important, realistic, vital, and beautiful pieces of queer media being created and shared with the world, a lot of which is much more accessible to audiences than Western media. I go heavy on the Thai shows in part because they are available for free on YouTube. 

I also think the West seems to think that having gay marriage is the be all, end all of queer inclusivity, and that they do not realize that countries without gay marriage are creating some of the most realistic queer content out there right now. The West has a lot it can learn from Asian BLs, but in my opinion, we’ve got our heads too far up our asses to be following their lead.

[watarfallar]

I bring more

Etho: I like to play this game called nap roulette. I take a nap and don’t set an alarm. Will it be 20 min or 4 hours? Nobody knows. It’s risky and I like it.

Jimmy: Scott, I want a bedtime story! Scott: I’m busy, Jimmy. I’ll tell you one tomorrow. Jimmy: If you don’t tell me a story, I won’t go to bed! Scott: Once upon a time, there was a person named Jimmy, who always wanted things their way. One day, their friends got sick of it and locked them in the basement for the rest of their life. Everyone else lived happily ever after. The end. Jimmy: I don’t like these stories with morals.

Bdubs: Where did you get that tomato soup? Etho: It’s actually a bowl of ketchup I just microwaved.

Skizz: Hey, what have you two been doing? Martyn: we were helping Cleo with their wedding vows and we were kicked out of their house for making it inappropriate. Joel: How is “Nice ass, Bdubs” inappropriate?

BigB, talking to Martyn: They're trying to lure me into a false sense of security! Well, joke’s on them! I’ve never been secure in my life! And I’m not about to start now!

Mumbo: I’m not so sure you’re stakeout material. Scott: I’m a chronic insomniac, I was born for this.

BigB: Ew. What kind of tea is this? Martyn: I boiled gatorade.

Pearl: I keep a picture of all of us in my wallet. Whenever I face difficulties, I take it out and stare at the picture. The Squad: Awwww- Pearl: And I tell myself "If I can deal with these idiots, then I can deal with anything." The Squad: Oh.

Gem: So what do you have planned for the future? Jimmy: Lunch. Gem: No, like long term. Jimmy: Oh...um, dinner?

Cleo: As someone who has a long history of not understanding anything, I feel confident in my ability to continue not knowing what is going on.

Bdubs, singing: I don’t want a lot for Christmas, there is just one thing I need— Joel: A family. Pearl: A better love life. Impulse: Mental stability. Jimmy: *clueless* Bagels?

Gem: Are you tall enough to play basketball though? Joel: Are you calling me short? Gem: I'm calling you vertically challenged.

Cleo: Am I in trouble? Skizz: Take a guess. Cleo: No? Skizz: Take another guess.

Etho: Sweet dog you got there. Police: Yes, this is our new drug sniffing dog. Etho: Still training huh? Police: What do you mean? Etho: Etho: Never mind.

Martyn, after asking the squad how to get rust off of a blade: Thank you good people oddly versed in knives.

Martyn: I wanna die. Joel: We all do, you aren't special!

Impulse and Gem texting* Impulse: Come downstairs and talk to me please. I'm lonely. Gem: Isn't Etho there? Impulse: Yes but I like you more.

Grian: When I first got my autism diagnosis, my first thought was “woah… it’s canon” and I think that maybe thoughts like that is why BigB made me get tested.

Pearl: We can’t tell you because you’re not a member of the club. Tango: What club? Scar: The hating Tango club. Tango: …The fuck? I should be the leader of that club!

+ a bonus soup group quote:

Keralis: Between Gem, Pearl and Impulse, there are three braincells. Keralis: And Impulse has all three of them.

[tomkaulitzssgirl]

i need to get fucked by tom when he realizes how turned on i get from him humping his guitar 💀

live every second | Tom Kaulitz

you stood behind the scenes, your arms folded against your chest as you smiled brightly watching tom run around the stage and jump.

he kept inciting the fans to scream as a grin spread across his face. they were all rocking it.

the show had been amazing, everything was impeccable, and the crowd was CRAZY. i had never seen such a turned up crowd.

they were singing “live every second” now and of course, the fans knew every word. i found myself singing too as i danced with my best friend, jessica, she was gustav’s girl.

finally, the part that i think everyone was waiting for arrived. tom and georg stopped playing as gustav’s drums accompanied bill’s singing as he said “live every second”.

your heart began to beat faster knowing what tom was about to do.

“he’s doing it. he’s doing it.” you repeated to jessica as she laughed, grabbing you arm.

tom took his guitar and as usual, he began humping it, his hips going back and forth. the crowd screamed even louder than before and you just wanted to join them, even though he was your boyfriend.

“oh girl, that’s what he will do to you tonight.” your friend said while she kept giggling at your expression.

your jaw was literally about to touch the ground. why did this turn you on so much? you saw him do it at every show but it never failed to make you want him right there.

it didn’t help that tom turned to look at you and winked with a smirk on his stupid but handsome face.

you shook your head at him while pressing your lips together. he knew what he had done.

right after the song ended, the band took a break. they came behind the stage, trying to get some fresh drinks.

tom walked towards you, kissing you as soon as he got closer, his hands on your waist, stroking the skin with his thumbs. he found his way to your core, rubbing over my panties and you gasped, looking around to see if anyone was watching.

“tom, you’re crazy.” you stopped his hand movement and intertwined your fingers together.

“i saw how you looked at me.” he whispered with a cocky smirk on his face, “we’re not done. just wait until we’re over, i’m gonna make you cry.”

was all he said before going back on stage. you stood there, speechless.

——————————

“what a good fucking show!” bill exclaimed as they all came back. the concert had finished and they were all sweaty and tired, but happy.

all the staff and of course you and jessica clapped your hands and hyped them up.

tom took a bottle of water and drank it fully. you watched as his adam’s apple went up and down.

“i messed up a bit.” he said right after he finished the bottle, throwing it away.

you could see he wasn’t that satisfied with himself and it made your heart ache. “what? you were amazing.”

“yes tom, you know i would make fun of you if you messed up.” bill said laughing.

you went up to him ready to hug him but he stepped back, “baby, i’m all sweaty. i look fucking disgusting.”

you rolled your eyes and hugged him anyway, resting your face against his chest, not caring of what he was saying. he wrapped his arms around you.

“why don’t we finish what we started earlier?” he whispered in your ear. you looked up at him with a sly smile and nodded.

“guys, we’re going to sleep a bit.” tom said taking your hand in his.

“yeah…sleep.” jessica held back a laugh while side eyeing you two.

he took you to his changing room, slamming the door behind him before pushing you against it making you yelp.

his lips kissed yours hungrily, his hands traveled roughly across your body, removing quickly your top, leaving only in your bra. he squeezed your breasts as he watched them in his hands, biting his lower lip.

“fuck. so hot.” he continued to squeeze them and massaging them gently, making you let out small moans. your hands went inside his big shirt, he understood you wanted it off and he quickly threw it away.

you observed his toned chest, stroking it and feeling his muscles beneath your hands meanwhile he took off your jeans.

his big hands cupped your ass and he kissed your neck, leaving marks on your skin.

“p-please tom.” you just wanted him, feel him inside you.

“what? use your words.” he teased as he took off his belt and baggy jeans, remaining in his underwear that clearly showed how hard he was.

“i want you in me.” you took your time, stroking every part of his upper chest and arms, giving attention to his biceps, abs, back muscles, everything.

tom revealed his length, taking it in his hand and stroking it a bit. “take off your panties.”

you did as he said, showing him your most private part. you always got shy as if it was the first time.

his hands went under your thighs, picking you up so you could wrap your legs around his waist. he could feel the heat coming from you against his skin.

his teased you sliding up and down his tip, making you squirm against him. “c’mon tom! please just fuck me.”

“was it so hard to say?” he smirked and put him himself inside you quickly, making you arch your back against the door.

“shit! you always feel so good around me.” tom groaned beginning to plump in and out of you.

“mmh, i’m so wet for you daddy.” you moaned kissing his neck, making him hiss when you found his spot right beneath his ear.

“fuck fuck fuck. i know you are. shit keep doing it.” his pace became fast as his fingers were deep inside your skin.

you continued leaving wet kisses on his neck, loving hearing him groan in pleasure. you moaned on his skin when he hit your sensitive spot.

“mmh, you were wet even before. you’re such a slut for me even seeing me with my guitar turns you on.” his hand wrapped around your neck, plying with your ability to breath.

“you know i-i am, just for you daddy.” you loved making him feel like the only man in the world, because he was at least for you.

“i know baby, you belong to me, say it.” you could hear the door creaking and slamming as he kept pushing you against it with his pace.

“i-i’m yours! oh my god!” you almost screamed, tears forming in your eyes for the pleasure you were feeling and he had to cup your mouth so that no one heard you.

“shh. look how deep i am inside you.” he watched as his dico went in and out of you, seeing a little bump in your lower belly. he pressed on it, making you roll your eyes back and moan against his palm.

he kept pushing, rotating his hips causing more friction before starting with his previous pace.

you clenched around him as your nails scratched his back, letting him know you were so close and you felt him twitch inside you. you were both ready.

“fuck! i’m coming inside you!” tom groaned and you nodded frantically, not being able to say something coherent.

you came before him, pushing your hips forward against him as your mouth hanged open, only moans coming out of it.

his juices coaxed your walls and he kept pushing, riding out his high.

“fuck-king. slut.” he said with the last pushes before stopping, his head falling between your neck.

he let you down, your arms still wrapped around his neck for balance because of your trembling legs.

neither of you said anything, you just tried to catch your breath as you guys gave each other small pecks.

“i love you.” tom said after awhile, placing a lock of your hair behind your ear.

“i love you too.”

little did you guys know that everyone else heard you.

[sulfursmells]

S is for Smelly

“I won? I WON!!! OMG” That was me about 7 hours ago. I received an email saying that I won the sweepstakes to spend a recording session with one of my fav idols S.Coups from seventeen. I’ve dreamed of having a chance to talk and admire him up close. He’s charming voice, well chiseled face and abs. Not to mention his big, soft melon sized ass. I always wanted to get a closer look and this is that chance. Let’s skip a little to when I arrived at the studio. I was basically shaking with excitement and anxiety about finally meeting my idol.

After walking in I met his manager who asked me to sign an NDA. Which I didn’t question sing any music and conversation should stay within the room though I did see a strange word in there that I didn’t really think about. “Did that say gas?” I asked myself after signing my name and walking towards the studio. I look through the doors window to see S.Coup sitting in a chair wearing a white shirt and tight white pants, glistening with sweat as if he just stepped off the stage. I hastily open the door and walk in introducing myself. “Hi I’m ..” he quickly interrupts me and says, “come here and let’s get started.” I start walking towards him , when I turn my attention to the door that I just walked through lock behind me. In an instant his calm, constructed idol personal fell revealing something I wasn’t expecting.

“Get down here right now” is all I hear before my world goes dark. I feel the embrace of his Jean covered ass envelope my entire face not leaving any space for anything but air. His ass carrying the scent of musk and sweat dripping onto my face as if he just finished a workout, which he might have by the smell of it. “I get complaints from the staff about my musk and gas. They say I leave the room almost uninhabitable after an editing session” he says as he starts to grind my face deeper into the seat. “So until I’m done you’re going to be my little seat protector, isn’t that exciting” he says as he starts to giggle.

Is this why I was brought here? To be nothing mod than the seat of my favorite idol? This is …….. hot. What kind of fan would I be if I didn’t help my fav keep up his reputation. With that decision made S.Coups raises his butt up a bit letting me see again as he removes his pants then boxers. His fat vulumptous cheeks pouring out of his tight boxers, as sweat drips onto my face. “Ahhhhhh I have to sir it out you know?”he says. I can’t see his face but I know he has a smirk on while saying all of this.Staring up and taking in the scenery, as his melon sized cheeks start to make their descent. “Be a good fan and try not to make too much noise, I still have some work to do. Thanks in advance” was the last words I heard. His ass easily enclosed my entire head only the heavy smell of musk that could rival 4 bony builders after a workout was left.

Then I heard it the gurgle of his stomach as he leans a bit to the left. A torrent of hot gas as bad as a dumpster fire hit me in the face going straight up my noose. I start to gag and cough, flailing about underneath S.Coups. “Can you quiet down, this is a job only my number one fan can do. If you do it well I’ll give you a little present at the end” he says. A present I wonder what it could be, “Do you understand?” S.Coups asks. I respond with a muffled yes and steel myself for what comes next.

“Fair warning, I get pretty gassy after practice so prepare yourself” then he sits full weight on my face. Then came the constant blasts, each one ranging from long silent hissing to loud bassy trumpets, actually it could rival a trumpet with how loud it was. Each one so hot adding my own sweat on top of the sweat the would drip off his cheek. After about a two hours he finally got up, giving me the first sight of light and fresh air in a while. When I got up I coughed and took a deep breath thinking I survived just to breathe in the scent that was dense in the room. “Damn I hoped that you would sniff them all up, I’m going to get in trouble again. Guess you have to be punished for not doing your job!” With that S.Coups pushes my body against the door pinning my face between the door and his ass. “ I would say I’m sorry but I’d be lying, say goodnight!!” I heard a grunt and then a fart that lasted way longer than any of his previous blasts fogging up the window on the door, rivaling the smell of a skunk and a garbage truck combined. Everything goes black.

I wake up and check around the room, S.Coup is nowhere to be found but his smell still stains the room even with the door open. I check my watch and four hours since my experience with him. I go walk towards my bag and find a sign cd from him and was elated that at least I got something from this experience, though I fire I didn’t entirely hate it. I rush home to play the cd, avoiding streets with a lot of people since the stench of his ass and gas was scorched onto my clothes. I rush into my room and pop the cd into my laptop and hear S.Coup start talking, “thank you to my number one fan for a fun experience” I start to blush thinking that the entire experience was worth it. Then I hear one of his notorious blasts come through the speaker of my laptop and my coughing in the background. “HE RECORDED THE WHOLE THING”, I sit back in embarrassment and then catch a whiff of my hoodie which he imprinted his scent onto. I start to sniff the hoodie and listen to his blast at the same time reliving my wonderfully smelly S.Coup Experience.

[prettiestlovergirl]

hii! its tots fine if no but could you maybe do some fluff with basketball player luke and like him tryinh to teach you how to play?🙈

i read basketball & fluff and my one tree hill obsessed heart started singing. YES, ABSOLUTELY I CAN DO THIS <3333 have to preface this by saying that i know like nothing about basketball, though. i am a strictly baseball-hockey girl myself sdjfhskdjfh. my knowledge is limited but i will do my best, hehe. she's short and sweet. enjoy, my lovely! 𓆩♡𓆪

"you might be the worst player i have ever seen, and i once watched grover try to play." your boyfriend, luke castellan, chuckled unhelpfully from behind you.

you and luke had been going out for a couple of months now and honestly? you'd never been happier. he'd made you feel so welcome your first week of camp and every day since, he'd made you feel safe and cared for.

you were basically luke's dream girl. you were funny, caring, charming, and you had very quickly become his safe space. your one big flaw, however, was that you couldn't play basketball for shit.

the two of you had been playing horse on the camp court and you were failing... miserably. luke already had H-O-R-S and you... had no letters. yeah, you were that bad.

"in the words of annabeth: statistically speaking, you should have at least gotten one by now." he grinned, his smile only growing wider when you turned around to glare at him.

"oh, fuck off! not all of us are basketball superstars!" you huffed, but you couldn't help but laugh along with him. this was part of why you cared about him so much, he could always make you laugh despite yourself.

"if this is the best you can do, i don't think we can see each other anymore. makes me look bad." he laughed, quickly getting up from the bench he was on to avoid getting hit with the ball you tossed at him.

"i'm kidding, i'm kidding! c'mere." he laughed, beckoning you toward him with that easy smile you loved. "i can't do it, basketball is not one of my many skills! quit on me, castellan, i'll only slow you down." you sighed dramatically.

"alright, drama queen. you can, just trust me." luke stated, rolling his eyes at your dramatics. "square your shoulders, to the basket." he instructed, watching as you begrudgingly did as told, lips formed in a little pout.

"now, you gotta bring the ball up right past your nose like this, okay?" he instructed, demonstrating exactly what to do with his own arms, ball in hand as you went through the motion with him.

"bend your knees a little." he corrected, holding the ball out for you to grab before stepping behind you. "relax your hips..." he murmured, gently placing his hands on you and leaning down to your ear to make sure you could still hear him... and also to be a romantic sap.

"and... just shoot." he stated, eyes watching you while you eyed the hoop suspiciously. "that's it? just shoot?" you asked, voice a little breathy as you turned your head a bit to look at him. "just shoot." he repeated with a nod.

"well, here goes nothing." you sighed, bending your knees a little more before bending a little and letting the ball fly out of your hands and... right into the net.

"holy shit" you breathed, grin breaking out onto your face as you turned to look at your smiling, slightly cocky boyfriend. "told you so." he smirked, grunting a bit on impact as you flung your arms around him with a laugh.

"okay, maybe you can be right sometimes." you relented, sighing dramatically like it was the hardest thing you'd ever have to admit. "that's very big of you, babe." he chuckled, eyes shining with adoration as he looked at you.

"now, do it a few more times and maybe you'll catch up to me." luke hummed, jogging leisurely to go pick up the ball from it's spot by the bench.

"nuh uh, castellan. i'm going out on the high of making that one shot, i'm retired, 'm too good to keep going." you stated, shaking your head and turning on your heel to leave.

"quitter!" he called after you, grinning as you simply flipped him off and kept walking. "see you before dinner?"

"duh, you owe me a victory kiss."

ᵈⁱᵛⁱᵈᵉʳ ᵐᵃᵈᵉ ᵇʸ @ᵐᵘʳᵘᶠᶠⁱⁿ

[fairylibe]

yandere.ᐟ vogel × reader head canons.

660 words. yandere themes. may be ooc. features: darius vogel, nika schwarz, ring schwarz.

꒰ summary ꒱ what if an interest turned into something… more?

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ darius 𖦹 vogel ೀ 🪽

was this so-called “love,” or maybe it was a twisted obsession? regardless he had fallen too deep with (…or was it “for”?) you to go back to a point before he knew you — far too deep.

admittedly, it was initially just an interest he had toward you. he wanted to get to know you, as you were crown’s fairytale keeper.

but it was as he was getting to know you, as he spent time with you, that he came to a realization.

although the whole of humanity is inherently flawed, there was one exception: you. maybe it was because, while you remained grounded, you also remained pure. while you looked kind, there was still a gentle fire in your eyes. everything about you was a perfect balance.

even if you weren’t cursed, he felt you were fit for his “family” — and more.

because you were the one and only perfect being in his eyes; that must be why he was drawn to you. the fact he could be so close to that one perfect thing was enough to send shivers, an illusion of “love.”

“ this world has no need for those impure souls who steal the bird’s song away. i will rid the world of all of them, so won’t you sing for me, fairytale keeper? ”

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ nica 𖦹 schwartz ೀ 🍒

he normally wasn’t one for much deep affections, so what was it with you that made him think about you so often? maybe it was because even when he would act friendly with you, your reactions felt so… genuine.

yes, those reactions felt so raw — he almost couldn’t believe it himself. whenever you two ran into each other, he would casually greet you, calling you “robin” and teasing you. he gets more of a kick every time you make a retort, claiming it’s worth teasing you (playing with you). he enjoyed making you dance atop his hand.

but despite being the one teasing you, it almost seemed as though you would sometimes play with his feelings as well, making him feel something between love and bitterness.

so he would hold your hand, and play with your feelings in turn, like he would a toy. so that if you fell in love with him, he could watch you pine in an unrequited love.

he may not be able to reciprocate your feelings, but at the very least, you can fall into a bitter warmth together.

“ i told you that all you have to do is not hold my hand, but if you’ve taken it of your own will, won’t you become my plaything? until there’s nothing left to lose, for me… and for you, robin. ”

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ring 𖦹 schwartz ೀ 💍

there is no such thing as being too protective when it comes to ring. at first, he had tried to push you away, because what reason was there for you to get close to him? if dari had ordered him to kill you, he would do exactly that.

and yet, you had reached out a hand to him, asking for a friendship. nika had warned him — “you can’t make friends with them, ring” — and yet the hand that reached out to him seemed so warm and gentle…

it was a somewhat fragile friendship, and it felt like a single word from dari or nika could shatter it to a million pieces, seeing as you two were in different organizations. and yet, you had shown him so many firsts.

eventually, he became scared, anxious, even. what was this feeling?

he wanted to protect this friendship he had with you, he wanted you to show him more and more “firsts,” he wanted to protect you.

“ if dari orders me to kill you someday… i would still do it. that wouldn’t change — i owe him my own life. but, if that were ever to happen, i would kill a part of myself after for you. ” if he were to remember you, would you show him more firsts after the last?

fin.

꒰ tag list . ꒱ @drachonia @weepinglycoris @letter-from-afar @.comment to be added or removed!

[badkitty3000]

What did you think was ooc for Five?

Great question, and I have already covered it a bit in my post here, but I could probably yammer on all day about it, so I'll add some thoughts.

Season 1 -3 Five was focused, determined, manic, arrogant, sometimes mean, violent, out-spoken, and full of love for his family above all. Yes, he insulted them and had no time or patience for their shit, but considering everything he'd been through and what he was up against, there was a reason for it. Season 4 Five? Ok, yeah, I can buy that maybe he was depressed and didn't really know what to do with himself anymore. Myself and others have certainly written him that way a few times. But, damn, he spent like all of season 3 bitching about wanting to be retired and here he could be! He could have played the stock market a few times, bought a little place somewhere, picked up a nice lady at the local Bingo hall and lived his peaceful live he deserved. Instead, he works (inexplicably) for the government and just wanders around with his sad little trenchcoat and CIA-issued pistol and flashlight, taking orders from The Man and just...existing I guess. I could see if they made it so that he joined the CIA to get inside info on Reginald and he had spent the last 6 years quietly plotting to take him down and get his revenge or set the world straight again. But no...he apparently hadn't even tried to look into anything Reggie was doing? Like he was just "*shrug*, it's probably fine".

Five loves his family above all else. We know this. If not, he wouldn't have spent decades alone fighting to get back to them and save all their stupid asses. Now, all of sudden, he just doesn't seem to care? Yes, he's present and has obviously kept in touch. He goes to the birthday party, etc. But there is zero interaction with Klaus, or his nieces, or even Viktor. When at the end, he finally gets some fight back (although for completely absurd reasons) and snaps at Luther, the whole family gasps in shock like this is some new occurence that Five would be mean to them. And he'd said much worse to them before! So, that leads me to believe he just has spent the last 6 years being a completely different person and everyone forgot he's actually an asshole?

And back to the family thing...fighting his brother over his wife? Falling in love with Lila, the same person who: conspired behind his and Diego's back in Season 2, was raised by his villainous boss, was the daughter of two innocent people he killed, tried to kill him with her fists, a frying pan, her feet, a knife, electrocution; and who he tried to kill multiple times as well. Yes, they have had time to heal some wounds and they have a shared traumatic experience with The Handler but come on...he would never! He would never be attracted to her that way. He would never betray Diego that way. And he certainly wouldn't fight him over her, not when she and Diego are married and have kids together. I don't care how many years they were together alone...just no. Best friends? Sure. Lovers? Fuck no.

Physically, where was his prowess? Five is supposed to be the all-time badass assassin, trained in martial arts and weaponry. His body is young at 19-20 years old, and at the peak of his physical fitness. Even without his powers he should be able to kick some ass, or at least try to. And then when he does have his powers, he just doesn't know how to use them correctly anymore? And again, he looks slow and weak in a fight. His solution to taking down the big Bennifer blob thing was to fire an entire clip at long range at it, and then just go "huh...weird that didn't work". Why wasn't he looking around the mall for a weapon? An axe? Something else to fight against it! That's what he does...that's his THING! We were fucking robbed of a Five-centric badass fight scene, when there were so many opportunities for one. Hell, he could have taken down a room full of Keepers with a fucking ballpoint pen while singing along to Abba's Dancing Queen! Why didn't we get that?

Meeting with Reginald. Remember in Season two when Five met with Reggie at the Tiki bar? He sat and had a drink with him, but it was still tension-filled with a lot of emotion there. Then in Season 3, when he was basically like "you're a sadistic lunatic that is going to kill all of us" and got right in his old man's face and told him he was a giant dick? This time...he's just standing around Reggie's house shooting the shit and not even acting like he's mad. That is just not the same guy. I realize this was supposed to be Viktor's fight with Reggie, but they still could have shown Five to have a little emotion there.

So, there you have it. I could probably keep going, but this is way too long as it is. It's just heartbreaking, really. This character that we have all come to love for all of his complexities and faults and heroics was just diminished to a one-dimensional, uninteresting character with no regard for his family. Basically, just undoing three season's worth of plot and character development. And it's not Aidan's fault. He did the best he could with the shit he was given, and I feel sorry for him. For as much as we love this character, Five was his. He made him come to life and there's not many other actors his age that could have pulled that off. So, I'm sad this was his end. They really did him dirty.