#when the post is too long it stresses me out but this way isn't very aesthetically pleasing...

[lapdogchase]

on the topic of special ed. i specifically remember in 6th grade one of my best friends was in both the gifted-and-talented program (we were in the same group for english, we did secret book club together) and the special ed program, and. you know those like. stool chairs with round bottoms that u could rock back and forth on, for like, kids with accommodations for adhd or whatever, idk if that's universal, but they were widely coveted and you could only have one in a normal classroom if you had it on ur disability accommodations plan. but if you were in g&t you got to use them in the Secret Meeting Room where you'd do secret book club, right. and i kind of assumed the special ed room was like that too, like you get a bunch of fun items and stuff and everyone treats you like the smartest kid in the world. well it is Not like that.

but i remember one day specifically where my friend was having a really bad day and was on the verge of a meltdown and she was like hey can i take my friend with me to the isolation room. (it was called something like that, maybe solitary room? either way it was something that even at age 11 i was like. bro what?) and i was like. the what? and she was like Oh that's where you go if you're having a meltdown or something and you're in special ed. so we went down to the room and it was in a corner near a janitors closet and i'd never even noticed the door before. and we went in and it was this. narrow, brick room, probably like 7 feet wide and 15, 20 feet long? and it had bright fluorescent lighting that was still somehow jarringly yellow, absolutely nothing on the walls or anything, and at the back wall. one (1) singular bean bag chair.

and i was like. this is where they bring you to CALM DOWN????? and she was like. yeah you get used to it i guess. if you have a meltdown they lock you in here and then screaming won't bother people since it's out of the way. I have forgotten most of my memories from elementary/middle school but i still remember standing in the doorway to that room feeling. so deeply horrified by the whole thing. while my friend thought of it as completely normal.

and like. that same year, or maybe the year before, my little brother was in another school, and he was having a lot of meltdowns and Problem Behaviors (as they were called). and the staff would tell my parents "he had some Behaviors but we Restrained him and he calmed down :)" and. while i was a kid at the time so my parents didn't tell me most of the story. what i know is my parents almost sued his school (and would have if we weren't poor) because when they say they "restrained" him, they meant they locked him in a tiny closet alone until he stopped screaming and crying and hitting the walls. and he was a tiny fucking kid. he was like, 8 at the time? weighed like 50 pounds. my parents found out bc he was coming home with bruises. it's evil it's inexcusable and frankly i hope every adult who turned a blind eye to it dies.

and it wasn't just him, it wasn't just that school, i've heard so many horror stories from my friends who were in special ed & stories my parents have told me about their friends' kids & stuff i've heard online from ex-sped kids etc etc etc. like the way these kids are treated is like, near-universally horrific.

like, if you were neurodivergent in the way where you were "smart" and didn't bother or upset anyone, while it was Very Traumatic (for reasons that have been Posted about by many many people, i don't need to explain them here i don't think). we were treated SO much better than the kids who were in special ed, or who had impulse control problems or meltdowns or anything like that that Bothered adults. and those facts can and do coexist. and it upset me when i was like 15, bc i had that kneejerk "are you saying my trauma isn't that bad" sort of reaction, but like.

being undiagnosed neurodivergent came with its own trauma obviously. and being in the g&t program could be stressful and isolating. but at the end of the day, like. as much as it could suck. they were treating us like we were special, throwing treats in our enclosure, telling us how Smart we are and how we definitely have an iq of 120 or whatever. we'd have little snacks and learn long division and whatever. Whereas they were straight up abusing the kids in special ed. objectively the way they were treated was horrific and cruel and inexcusable. and far worse than the g&t program was. like sorry if it upsets you to hear that. but they weren't locking us in closets they were throwing pizza parties and letting us use the fun chairs. it's just not comparable at all really

[whore-ibly-hot]

Yandere Boarding school thoughts... (Gender Neutral)

18+ Minors DNI

Warnings: Multiple yanderes, non-con touching, dub-con, perverted thoughts, obsession, bullying, masturbation, aphrodisiacs, general perversion, dry-humping, voyeurism, controlling behaviors, typical yandere stuff, breeding, drug usage, horny posting.

(AN: I have rizz-en from my grave to be horny once more. All of these guys are avaliable for requests, but will be listed under the materlist simply as Yan!Boarding School.)

Background: Thinking about a Headmasters child!Reader at a private boarding school. For a Fem!Reader, perhaps you're just visiting daddy for the season while he's running the school, or maybe you've been bad, and need more supervision. For a Masc!Reader, it could be the same case, however, with Blackmoore Academy being an all male school, this opens up the availability for reader to be attending.

Student scenarios and profiles:

◇ Harrison Spence, star member of the swim steam, basketball player, and golden boy. Despite jock stereotypes, he's respectful and mature. He always looks out for others, and this lends to why your father suggests rooming with him. Plus... if anything were to happen, your father wouldn't hate to have him as a son in law. He's SOOO friendly when he meets you. Those big strong arms are perfectly suited to lug your bags upstairs to his room. Want help putting stuff away, sure! For a Fem!Reader, he's not suprised how awkward he is when he's unzipping your suitcase, only to be met with some thin lacy garments. He just coughs and backs off. For a Masc!Reader, he wears boxers too! So why does he still feel so hot. He should open a window.

He'll make sure you fit in around campus, mostly steering you in the direction of the athletics department. He'd love to see you at some of his games, cheering him on. You seem so nice, he could really seem himself with you long term, the more he thinks about crushing on you. Besides, you already share a living space. He feels awful about how his body reacts anytime you're too close. You left a jacket behind that smells just like you? He tries not to think about the consequences of fisting his cock into it. Late night out at one of his games? Who cares if you share a dorm and your bed is literally six feet away, it's too far of a walk. Slide into his bed, he's a gentleman. At least until he wakes up the next morning, mind foggy as he instinctively moves his cock up over the waist band, putting a leaky tip against your ass as he resists the urge to press his head into your neck, opting for a pillow instead. He's so, so sorry, but he's gott a deal with it, and you just feel so good. He rationalizes it by saying he's not just some horned up guy, no. You're his roommate, HIS. And what would the Headmasters think! No, he wants a future with you, romance, not just a warm hole to rut...

"Hey, roomie! Listen, practice is running kinda late tonight, so I'm gonna grab food on the way back. Why don't you text me your order, I can bring it back. We can make a whole thing out of it, no need to pay me back! I'm thinking burgers?"

◇ Carter Matthews, student body president, scholar, and in every AP class possible. Even some dumb ones. He doesn't pay much mind to you, you ate very attractive but so is he. If he felt the need for a relationship, he could get whomever he wanted. But he hates... hates how you make the other students, even some of the faculty act. He can't help but follow you around, making sure you obey curfew, and don't get into any trouble. He likes to keep order around here, and it bothers him to have to ignore his student body presidential duties to make sure some delinquent isn't trying to slip you a spiked drink, or some jock has you under the bleachers trying to get your mouth wrapped around their tips.

Eventually, he decides you could be helpful instead of a hinderance. He's busy, may need a form of stress relief, and given babysitting you when Harrison isn't around is one of the main sources of that stress, why shouldn't you help him out. Besides, you look so cute flustered. Maybe it starts small, he tells you your uniform bottoms aren't regulation, and while he tugs them down to 'fix' them, his hands wander a bit too much, grazing the soft skin of your ass. During random room inspections, he may let his hatred of the sports program taking up all the funding by mentioning how obvious it is your roommate wants to stick it in you. Harrison can't stand him, not trusting the cold creepy gaze of the prefect. He'll force you to come to student council meetings, under the guise of assisting him with preparing for a faculty dinner to appease your father, only to get you under his desk while he writes, trying to guide you with one stern hand. He doesn't like to go too deep, not one to enjoy gagging or unnecessary sound that would distract him from working.

"Keep it down." He scolds, cold eyes peering down through blonde bangs. With a sigh, his free hand strokes your cheek. "Just suckle, alright? There'll be plenty of time after I'm done for you to make sweet noises around my cock..."

◇ Evan Reed, CAPTAIN of the swim team, and student assistant PE coach. He's used to play basketball alongside Harrison, but got kicked out for being too violent. Shoving, pushing, and going as far as knocking teeth out. He's a fucking animal. He's handsome, of not a bit of a loner. He isn't popular or unpopular, people tend to leave him alone because of that bad boy attitude and his temper, but he's always welcome to party with the jocks, welcomed into parties and known as a keg-stand king. And boy do you catch his eyes, giving that your always hanging off Harrison, or being trailed by Carter. He's more than happy to accompany you to the pool or help you out in gym class, but it's obvious what he wants. He'll get up behind you in the pool, still smelling of cigarettes as he asks mundane questions while trying to pull your swimsuit to the side and get his hands on that sweet spot between your thighs. Or maybe he'll sit on the edge of the pool, congratulate you on how good your doing, legs spread as he pulls you between them, hoping you'll end up accidentally eyeing his cock. If you are a Masc!Reader, then there's definitely some internalized homophbia. He'll make sure you know these are just normal friend activities, even when he's got you bent over in the boys locker room, ass up. He doesn't EVER plan to be the one on the bottom.

He's a player, chasing tail outside of the school, hitting on peers sisters and mom's alike. But now, he plans to keep you around, not because he necessarily feels like he wants a romantic relationship with you, but because he loooooves how pissed it makes Harrison. He never liked the goody two-shoes, and half suspects he's one of the people who pushed to get him kicked out of basketball. He likes to pick on people, but Harrison sees himself as a knight in shining armor. So it gives Evan a major power boner to make you grind up against him on the dancefloor at some preppy party, while Harrison just has to stand by and not crush his beer can. Evan knows harrison will never, ever do anything to ruin your good guy image of him. Ever.

He's pissed, punching a locker as he let's out a growl. 4-0, what the fuck is wrong with his team? How could they get fucked over so bad after weeks of missing parties for shitty practices. Luckily for him, he sees you on the sidelines, probably waiting for Harrison to walk you back to your dorm. He takes this opportunity to slide up behind you, hands on your hips as you can feel his angry erection rutting up against your ass. "You. Me. Locker room, five minutes, stall three. Be ready, underwear off and bent over or I'll take you in front of the guys who are still changing? Got it?" He departs with a harsh smack on your rear.

◇ Joseph Mick, he's in the newspaper, but it's not like he's the head or anything. He just love photography, and he's the only guy at school to have really mastered the dark room. He's known to be a little... odd. He's the youngest in you and Harrisons class, with a petite stature and thin, lanky arms. He's pale, almost gaunt, but that could be a lack of sunlight given that he spends all his time in the dark room or toiling over photo arrangement mock-ups in the journalism room. People avoid him, but he's okay with that. He's more than happy to just watch from a distance, and photography is his real branch to the world. People only talk to him or react positively if he's taking photos for the paper or the school newsletter. He actually meets you at one of Evan's swim meets, he gets good seats for being student press, and you get good seats for just being Evan's new favorite piece of ass. Your aren't even sure why you were invited, you don't even know anything about how one wins a swimming competition. But Joseph does. He's been to enough of these, and you notice, so you lean over and start asking him questions. He's shocked someone is talking to him, and not about getting a bigger feature in the yearbook. He's more than happy to help point stuff out to you, even if he had to repeat himself or stutter his way through something. He's feeling his heart flutter and his hands shake so much so he can barely hold the camera. Soon, he's watching as you walk away, wishing he could grab onto you and hang you up on his wall to admire like one of his pictures. It's only made worse when he sees a pair of masculine arms dragging you into the boys locker room.

He's a stalker, but it's not his fault! For one, he's got no idea how to approach anyone, much less someone he likes as much as you. And since he's got that reputation as a creep, if he approached you in public, Harrison would be polite but firm at shooing him away, Carter would give him a look that makes him feel like a worm beneath his well polished shoes, and Evan would beat him to the brink of death, but then pass him over to his friends. But God, if he didn't think it was worth it sometimes to just be close to you. He can only get as close to you as his high-focus lens will allow. He's got hundreds of photos of you, some taken by him, some by campus security cams, and he treats each one like the piece that's gonna get him into a top art school. He almost feels bad taking risqué shots of you. He's always following you, and he sees the ways those... those pigs are treating you. If he could stand up to them, he would. He sees (from the cameras he's slipped into your bag) the boner Harrison is always sporting when he in your presence, he even caught a glance of Harrisons late night rendezvous with your pillow. He sees the way Carter leads you through the hallways like his little secretary, lithe fingers trying to get up your uniform bottoms. Worst of all is the way he sees Evan humping you in the pool like a dog in heat, with you obviously unsure about how you feel about this. He knows he'd treat you right, if you'd ever consider being with something like him. Notice he almost feels too bad to take risqué pictures. He can't help it if a picture or two from one of his hidden cams has a bit of an upskirt, or gets a little to zoomed in on your pecs. But know that as he drums humps the table in the dark room, those copies are only so he can keep one in his room and one on his person! He'd never, ever share your sexual exploits, not like Evan would, always bragging about what he does with, or more likely to you.

Being on the newspaper staff, he's got a pretty good idea of everyone's schedules. He's more than happy to try and squeak out some words to you if he knows your many admirers are preoccupied. Trust him, he knows A LOT of good spots to share a meal privately or maybe... maybe you'd like to see the dark room? He's even got a pillow in there, a cushion he can place on a soft stool in case you ever came to visit. He hopes he could get a private photoshoot in, maybe with some silly pictures of you, or even some lewd pics, he's just happy to see his collection expand. He doesn't have a lot of money, but he's more than happy to buy you as much cheap vending machine food as you want as long as you'll spend time with him.

"Oh, shi- hey! I didn't realize you'd be stopping by here. I'm just, uh, editing some photos for the paper." You don't notice as he slyly moves a tray of pics taken outside a dorm window that looks suspiciously like yours. He thanks whoever is out there in this moment that the dark room has a sink as he keeps his right hand out of sight.

◇ Tyler Mertz and Percy 'Pez' Goldberg, two outsiders, and self proclaimed 'dudes with bad tudes'. Put into the same headcanon spot because they aren't ever seen apart. Tyler and Pez got in on scholarship, and immediately bonded because they know they don't fit in among the rich kids at Ridgemoore. Tyler got in on a scholarship to pursue culinary excellence, because if he can do one thing, it's cook. Pez was awarded a scholarship by lottery two years ago, and even though he's barely passing most of his classes and is the biggest delinquent in school, he can't be kicked out. The school made too much of a big deal about his acceptance to create some good press, the faculty are planning to just wait the problem out. Repeating a year hasn't helped with that, though. Still, they are attached at the hip. Both struggle in classes, Pez because of a shitty social life and even shittier focus, and Tyler because he's just a little slow. Still, Tyler excels in cooking, and the faculty know he's trying. There's a few ways you might come across the pair. Maybe you decided to take culinary, and got paired up with a sweet, dopey guy who turns out to be a fucking MasterChef, or maybe your a brat!reader, like I mentioned earlier, and you meet Pez in detention, where he's glad to know the schools newest troublemaker is a looker too. Most likely, you come across them when either Evan makes you tag along to buy some weed and half-priced shitty beer for a post-game party, or Carter tells you he'll personally see to it that your father tethers you to him if he sees you talking to those 'deliquents'. Either way, they're probably some of the nicest guys in the school, even though Pez likes to fight. He's not a bad guy, but the school can't seem to recognize half of the shit he does is in retaliation to someone fucking with him or his friend.

Pez will like any kind of reader, any. If you're bratty!reader, he loves having someone to run around and bust shit up with. But he'll promise to leave the statue of your father alone, if that's what you want. If you're an innocent!reader, he can't deny he'd love to ruin that good guy/girl image you have going on. Smoke a little weed, sneak out a little, let him show you a good time. He promises he won't cross any lines or do something that would really scare or upset you. He's not a bad guy, he just wants to show you there's so much stuff out there to do. Unlike Joseph, he doesn't let the fact that others think he's a freak keep him from hanging with you. He wants them to see that you like him. HIM. He thinks your adorable no matter who you are, and frankly, snuggling up on the Headmasters kid is just another act of defiance he's happy to flaunt. Eventually, he might even open up to you about his shitty home life, and the fact he's only called Pez cause' when he's high that candy is all he wants to eat.

Tyler is a huge softie. He doesn't let the thing people say about him get to him, mostly because he's a bit dense in the moment to know he's being made fun of, but also because he's okay with being alone. He's happy with who he is, a nice guy. But, that doesn't mean he doesn't love his best buddy, or mind adding you to there little group. It's just one more mouth to feed in his eyes. He'll walk you to all your classes, slinging his big arms around you and keeping you close to his side. Unlike Pez, he grew up with a pretty loving family, and they're what he misses most about being away at boarding school. Most of the money he makes selling weed with Pez goes back to his family, but they don't really know how he makes it. He comes to see you and Pez as his new little family.

With these two, there will be lots of late nights with bad movies and pizza made from scratch. Being on some rundown couch squished between to large bodies, at least one set of arms wrapped around your waist. I think they both are pretty open about telling each other about the crush they have on you, given that they are best buds. These idiots probably got super high one night, and Tyler let slip that he, quote, 'thinks he wants to put a baby in you', to which Pez replies he'd like to put something along those lines in you too. It wouldn't be hard for them to both come to terms with wanting to share you, they share everything else. They just hope you'd want both of them, Pez and Tyler can't stand the thought of making things awkward by you only wanting one of them, so they both subtly try to transition you into the roll of being their partner.

Pez would be fucking fuming when he starts realizing the things boys at school are doing to you. Whether he witnesses it himself, or you come to him and Tyler seeking comfort, he'll pound the shit out of anyone who tries to touch you like that. If you like someone else, Pez wouldn't wail on them to eliminate a rival like Evan would, but rather he hands it over to Tyler. Tyler would come up with some rumors, maybe a reason the guy isn't right for you, and why would Tyler lie? He doesn't feel great about lying, but thinking about the things guys at this school do to you, fills the sweet chefs stomach with a bitter bile.

They wouldn't outright pressure you into sex, but rather try and find ways to coerce you into requesting or initiating it. Pez has some weed laced with something, nothing too strong, but it'll make even a nun feel a little frisky. He'll lay back or rub your thigh, hoping the weed will relax you enough to come out and say what you want. Maybe an aphrodisiac or two gets slipped into a warm drink Tyler made for you. It gets you feeling all hot, but don't worry, you can stay in their room overnight and wear their clothes, so they can... make sure you're not sick or anything.

"Hey," you can feel a pair of arms wrap around you from your spot at the library table. You look up and see Pez, with Tyler now playfully laying his head on the table beside you. "Heard that shithead Evan's got an away game, so it looks like your freed up after all to spend a little time with your favorite guys." His lips are dangerously close to your ear, making you squirm. "Yeah, man, we've got a bunch of movies n' shit from the store, and I'll even make your favorite. Stay the night, it's not like we've got anywhere to be tommorow, and my beds so cold..." Tyler teases playfully, eyes wide and feigning sadness.

All these boys make it difficult to get any alone time at Ridgemoor, but the men certainly don't make it easier... (Taboo part two with the faculty coming soon, because I'm horny for Dilfs and old men with questionable dynamics with reader.)

[pomefioredove]

for a oneshot how about vil gets sick and reader/yuu (your choice) helps take care of him? :3

o7

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ it comes with a fever

type of post: fic characters: vil additional info: romantic or platonic, reader is gender neutral, reader is yuu, took a more unique approach to the sick prompt, would say ooc but this is just how having a cold sore makes you act

"He hasn't left his room all day,"

Epel's still got that uncomfortably tight grip around your wrist. He hasn't let go since he dragged you out of Ramshackle.

"Not even Rook is allowed in. It's... damn strange," he mumbles, disturbed.

You stop in front of the Pomefiore Housewarden's door.

The boy looks at you. "I'd go in myself, but... ah, I'd figure you'd have more luck,"

Which you suppose is his way of saying "Vil PROBABLY won't kill you"

"It's got everyone spooked, Prefect. Like a herd 'a sheep without a sheepdog,"

So, it's up to you. Somehow.

Epel finally lets go of your wrist and disappears before you can ask any questions. Your newly freed hand closes around the door handle.

It's probably nothing, you tell yourself. But if Vil won't even see Rook... there's a slim chance he'll be happy to have you waltzing through the door.

You walk in, anyway.

The room isn't dark or dreary. There are no strange smells or messes. Nothing is out of place, except for the bundle of blankets on the bed and-

FWISH!

You drop to your knees just before a cushion-turned-missile can hit you.

"Get out!"

Definitely Vil. At least he's alive? "You're not supposed to take the name "throw pillow" literally!"

The familiar canto of your voice makes that bundle go quiet and still. And then, from its depths, a loud, uncharacteristic whine. "Don't look at meeeee-"

You can suddenly see why everyone in Pomefiore is "spooked".

"I'm not going to hurt you," you say, as if approaching a wild animal caught in a trap. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing!" he hisses.

"That's not very convincing,"

And, of course, he knows as much. Vil sighs, and you can see the bundle moving. He pulls out an arm and elegantly drapes it over his head. "I'm hideous,"

Did he get hit by a bus or something? You blink. "You're just sick. It's not the end of the world,"

A long, long sigh follows. The bundle moves again, and a person comes out of it- and if you weren't in his room and responding to his voice, you might not have recognized them as Vil.

He's messy. His hair is tangled and limp. His face is flushed and sweaty. He looks...

"See?" he points to his lower lip.

With the general state of him, you honestly hadn't even noticed the small bump on his lip. You blink.

"...That's what you're upset about?"

He glares. "Don't patronize me. I have a standard to uphold. I can't go out looking like this!"

"It's just a cold sore, Vil,"

"Just?" he crosses his arms. "Just, you say? You're either lucky or stupid. This isn't some common blemish I can cover up with a patch and concealer! This is a personal failure! All the supplements, all the medicated chapstick, and the vitamin C and I still-"

He shudders. "...And it comes with a fever, so if you have any sympathy to give, at least let it be for that,"

You sigh, a weary, but fond smile on your face. "Oh, Vil... let me get you some orange juice,"

He crosses his arms and almost pouts. "And the strawberries in the bottom drawer of the fridge,"

"Those, too,"

.

With your service, Vil eventually calms himself down, though he still lies in bed as if he were dying of something terrible.

By the third or fourth bad Neige Leblanche movie of the evening (making fun of them with you is good for his mental health), it's starting to get dark.

"Seven already?" you mutter, checking the time on your phone.

Vil's eyes widen, and he pretends as if he wasn't staring when you look back. "So?"

"So... I have to go," you say. "I have to make dinner. I have to-"

"You're not seriously going to leave me in this state, are you? I'm supposed to avoid stress,"

You blink. Is he really... He's guilt-tripping you?? You almost laugh- it's endearing to see him so...

...Not him.

"You want me to stay?"

"Yes," he says immediately. He clears his throat, and then: "...For my health. Go speak to Rook, get us takeout."

If you were a worse person, you might have teased him about how cute he is when he's needy... But you also know he's not going to be indisposed for long, and you'd like to survive to see next week.

You smile. "Sure. Can't say no to free food,"

"But no chocolate or nuts, and I'd like something with a lot of lysine, some order of tofu and beans. Ask Rook, he'll know what to get,"

A pause.

"...Thank you,"

He really is quite cute like this. Then again, Vil Schoenheit can pull absolutely any look off.

You head for the door, your hand closing around the cool handle once again.

"And Prefect?"

You turn. Vil hesitates, seemingly warring with himself over something. You can't say which side won, because he only sighs.

"Help yourself to whatever pajamas you'd like. And don't bother asking some dimwitted question about where you're going to sleep. You'll obviously be staying in my bed,"

[girlthatgotawaysdiary]

study tips: how to get a 4.00 GPA 🩰

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All throughout last year I've gotten perfect grades on my report cards and many of my friends have asked how I've done it and i seriously had no idea until recently when I started to take notice of my new ways of studying... and today ive decided to put all my findings on this post...so here we goo...💋

#1 finish ur homework the second u get it:

I cannot stress this enough HOMEWORK IS IMPORTANT! idc if you’re too lazy or busy studying for exams, homework is almost half of your grade, doing it the second you get it is the best way to eliminate the stress and procrastination you get when trying to tackle an assignment.

#2 be nice to teachers:

ultimately teachers are the ones deciding your fate, so being a teacher's pet isn't always a bad thing. you don't have to absolutely love them, but giving them respect while speaking, trying to connect with and get to know them, and even just thanking them after class would take you a long way. 

#3 pay attention in class:

ive heard this a million times and as a girly with undiagnosed adhd it is so hard for me to focus during class, but one thing I found helpful is sitting in front of the class. this was important because the teacher was literally in my face so I couldn't zone out. a thing that also helped me is 24/7 taking notes or highlighting passages.

#4 start caring: 

in middle school, i literally did not care about school whatsoever(and im sure most of u as well) and that was because i didn't have any severe consequences. my parents may get mad at me and i may feel disappointed in myself, but there was no long-term consequences. so when i started high school.

i had to start caring because high school grades are all that matters to universities. it was also because i knew i had a dream and wanted to achieve it, and the only way to do so was to fake being a good student till i actually became one.

something that also stops you from caring about school, is u caring about other people or what they think of u, whether it be positively or negatively. thinking about others will take up most of your brain capacity very quickly, which would result in u being distracted and not caring about ur schoolwork.

#5 surrond urrself with people who actually want to improve themselves:

this is SO important! surrounding urself with negative people who don't care about education can greatly affect you(e.g. making u late to class) making friends with people who show up to class on time, get their work done fast, and respect others is a pathway to getting good grades. i believe that the most people you spend time with reflect on who you are, and don't let those people be negative.

*now these tips won't guarantee you getting immediate straight A's, but applying them to your school life will definitely improve it.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

[kisssukuna33]

Can i request Sukuna hyping up and being very devoted to his wife who is insecure about her body after having a baby?

Husband Sukuna comforting Wife reader who's insecure about her body after having a baby

"He finally went to sleep" Sukuna said letting out a big sigh of relief as he sat down on the couch beside you.

As much as it was a blessing, being first time parents really took a toll on you both. It's only been 2 months so far and the baby has pretty much changed your life upside down. The dark circles visible in both of your faces say that enough.

"He kept crying even after you left to check the restaurant this morning" a displeased sigh left your mouth matching your husband's.

"I told you to sleep woman" Sukuna said gently grabbing your face into his hands as he observed the dark circles under your eyes, a concerned expression taking over his face.

"Tell that to your son, he's the one keeping me up"

"That's why I told you to call me if he started to give you shit. That's it, I'm closing the restaurant for 3 more weeks" Sukuna said, no almost like he scolded you.

"You're going to lose customers if you keep closing it like this" You voiced your concern because you know Sukuna didn't spend time in the restaurant more than 4 days since you have given birth. Everytime he had to leave he looked at you like he's leaving you alone in a Battlefield.

"That's not something you have to concern yourself with, I pay the workers anyway" He got up from the couch as he went to your shared bedroom and came back with a bag in his hands.

"Besides I already earned enough for my family to be comfortable, you know that" He said as he put the bag in your hands.

"what's this?" You asked curiously taking a peek inside the bag. A dress. A gorgeous tube dress with a large flower in the middle and cut out from the sides. You can never compete with Sukuna's taste when it comes to choosing clothes. He knows what looks good on you everytime and you never doubted his taste until maybe now.

You have given birth only 2 months ago, your post pregnancy belly and the stretch marks surrounding it is still pretty much visible, not to mention you are completely a different size from before. You anxiously check the inside of your dress to see the size Sukuna bought you, in deep down you wanted to check if Sukuna also took notice in your change of weight. But for some reason the size tag has been ripped off from the dress already. That sly bastard.

"Wear it, We are going out for dinner. I already called Choso so he will babysit tonight" Sukuna said as he leaned down and pressed a kiss to your hair. He wanted to make you happy, he really did. He didn't want you to remember the early part of your parenting journey as only stress. He thought maybe finally going out for dinner can be a good change for the both of you. But it didn't take him that long to notice the sour expression in your face.

"uh Kuna how about we-"

"No we are going, you have been inside the house for 2 months. You need this" he said in a stern voice leaving no room for arguments.

You sigh thinking of another way to not wear this dress.

"This looks expensive" That earned an eyebrow raise from Sukuna.

"of course it isn't. When the fuck have I ever bought you cheap shit?" Sukuna said like he's personally offended by your comment.

"That's not what i- Anyway maybe this is too much for a dinner" please work! Please work! You mentally chanted as you continued with the lie "I'm gonna save this for a special occasion".

Sukuna wore a dumb look on his face. Clearly trying to figure out what nonsense are you spouting because he can just buy you a new one? Like he always do?

You avoided meeting meeting Sukuna's gaze because that man can read you like a book.

"Woman what are you- And Why do you keep looking that way? Look at me" Sukuna said as he kneeled down in front you.

He cupped your face with one hand as he brought it closer to his face.

"spit it out"

You left out a sigh as you began telling him how you felt about your post pregnancy body and it didn't take long for Sukuna's face to drop. He felt like it was his fault that you felt this way. It's been few weeks since you two shared intimacy and Sukuna wasn't able to remind you how much devoted he is to your body even after you gave birth ( your doctor said 4 weeks of no sex but Sukuna being the protective husband he is, decided to wait atleast two months).

The moment you finished your explanation Sukuna picked you up into his arms. He wrapped your legs around his waist as he carried you to the bedroom.

He gently put you down the bed as he started to take off your shirt. You were a bit nervous at first but decided to let him do it anyway. The moment you see the scars visible in your belly you looked away hiding from Sukuna's gaze.

"Look at me, Don't look away"

Sukuna brought his face closer to your scars. First he ran his fingers through them. Like a blind man reading a book and touching it with care. Then his lips started to touch your skin. He kissed you softly slowly making his way around your scars. He kept bringing his eyes to yours reminding them to keep watching. Sukuna didn't miss a single scar, no. When he finally separated his lips from your body, you felt like he casted a spell on you. A purifying spell making all the negative energy around your body go away.

"You went through hell with the brat, those scars are reminders that how strong of a fight you put up. Scars or without scars you are still the same gorgeous woman I fell in love with 2 years ago" listening to Sukuna's words you can't help but let the tears fall down. How much lucky you must be to have this man in your life. If you could marry him again you would do it in a heartbeat.

"And don't you dare call my wife ugly I will fucking kill you"

That earned a giggle from your part as you smacked his chest playfully.

"Your wife must be a very lucky woman then" you murmured wrapping your arms around Sukuna's neck as you pull him into your embrace.

"Nah, I'm the lucky one"

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

TOMATO LINGUINE.

carmen “carmy” berzatto x fem!reader — fluff

summary. you surprise carmy with a homemade meal to welcome him home after a long, tiring day at he restaurant. you’re nervous. he’s pleased. you’re tired, and so is he. luckily the couch is calling your names

word count. 834

never wrote him before so im shitting my pants. but he’s been on my mind and needed an outlet. also no s3 spoilers

⎯ ☆ ⎯

Being Carmy's girlfriend isn't always so straightforward. It's great, but it isn't easy. He dislikes the help and aid of others, not because he doesn't like the care or the way it feels, rather, he believes he doesn't deserve it.

So over the past couple of months, you had been subtly increasing the ways you look after him - doing little things to show your love. First, you started small, preparing a water bottle in the fridge overnight, attaching a cute post-it note for him to read as a pick-me-up during service the next day. Then, you moved onto organising his stuff by the front door - lining his clogs and his commuting shoes beside his backpack, placing his coat next to it as an attempt to make his morning easier. You just wanted to help lighten his load, even if that means organising things for him that he’s bound to never forget.

You had been working up to making him dinner. It was an awfully scary thing, not because you were uncertain with your way around the kitchen, but worried in the chance Carmy were to hate it - or make a critique you couldn’t stomach.

You knew he would be tired coming home tonight, a critic in the restaurant will do that to him. You wanted to make him something to eat for when he returns, something homely and welcoming, just something comforting to make up for all of the stresses from today.

You decided on pasta, an all round dish with very little room for error. A jar of sauce would be blasphemy in his apartment, an insult almost, so you made your own simple sauce - placing tomatoes and garlic in a dish, coating it with one of Carmy’s fancy olive oils before throwing it in the oven to roast. It was one you had made a bunch of times for yourself before, so you were fairly confident with it. Sort of.

Remembering little tips he had taught you, you implemented them with everything you cooked - like right now, saving the water from the linguine to incorporate later. And to season throughout, not just at the start or end. You wanted to impress him. You always wanted to impress him.

The key in the door jingles and you rush to add the finishing touches - sprinkling on some chopped herbs, and placing a piece of homemade garlic bread on the side. 

“Hi,” you softly call out, hearing his shoes hit the skirting board - no doubt after he had just kicked them off.

He paces over to you, moving sluggishly as he wraps his arms loosely around your waist, chin hooking over your shoulder. “Hi,” he says back, voice tired against your ear. “Smells great in here.”

“Good. I’m glad you think so,” you smile, pressing a kiss into his temple. “I made you dinner.”

“You uh, you did?” he pulls back, a sheepish smile on his face.

You hum, moving aside to pick up the bowl. “But I can put it in the fridge if you’ve already eaten…”

“No no no,” he shakes his head, reaching to take the bowl from your grasp. “I– I haven’t all day, so uh, so this is perfect,” he nods faintly, reaffirming his words.

Your gaze flickers from the bowl to his eyes, growing antsy. “Please just try it, this is killing me,” you say, scrunching your face from the anticipation. 

He twirls the pasta on his fork and takes a bite, humming in a pleasant tune as he chews.

“Is it good? Is it bad? Too much garlic?” you ramble, nervous from his lack of verbal response. 

“No,” he shakes his head. “It’s uh, it’s tremendous,” he smiles, 

“You’re not just saying that?” you joke. “Not trying to spare my feelings, are you?”

“No,” he chuckles earnestly, shaking his head. “I mean it… it’s almost perfect,” his smile softens as he twirls his fork for another bite. “Did uhm, you use my olive oil?”

“Only a little bit– hope that’s okay.”

“Of course,” he nods once more, chewing his mouthful. “It’s great, I love it,” he grins faintly, leaning in to kiss you. “Thank you.”

–

With full, happy bellies, each of you lay on your sides on the sofa - snug to one another to share the small space. Carmen props the side of his head in his fist, elbow bent beside your head. 

“How are you feeling?” you ask, referring to the  moment of comfortable almost silence.

You notice him hesitate, and to assure him, you copy his movement - propping your head in your hand, your other reaching to the side of his face. You stroke over his sideburn, fingers grazing back into his messy, unkempt curls.

“Tired,” he exhales, eyes closing from your touch. 

“Me too,” you murmur. You adjust, eyes silently asking him to do the same. Moving forward and twisting, you lay your head on his chest - your arm wrapping around his waist tightly. “Get some sleep, Bear. Busy day tomorrow, you need the rest.”

this is probs a one time thing btw x

[hrtzstargirl]

I Wanna Be Yours.

Danielle Marsh.

Synopsis: She figured it out. Why she keeps throwing you those loving eyes, after a long time of being confused finally she is certain about one thing. Being yours.

Part 1

Pairing: Danielle Marsh x 6th!member!reader

Warnings/side notes: I decided to make a part 2 of my first Danielle fic, I thought it's cute and necessary because of how the first ended🥲 I'm posting a lot these days, cuz it's winter break! I am feeling that christmas spirit that's why I'm not lazy the past few days LMAO, anyway MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

--

Danielle is confused. She's very confused, why? Because Minji's words are starting to hit her, she couldn't get her words out of her head. She's been acting different lately but is trying to mask it by being bubbly as usual.

One thing she hates the most whenever she's feeling like this or when she's out of her mind—is that you noticed. You always did and Danielle hates it. She hates how you can read her like an open book, hates it how you know her better than herself, hates it when you understand her feelings better than she does.

Due to the stress, she's been distancing herself from you and it's driving you insane. And the fact that Hanni's words seems to hit too.

Danielle slumped down on the couch, her mind seems to be drifting to somewhere else. The noises of the green room fell on her deaf ears. There she is again, zoning out, staring into the distance.

No matter how much she tried, her thoughts will always comes back to you. Your smile, you laugh, your goofiness, your loser personality, how you make her feel like she's the only girl in this world, how you treat her, you're an entire green forest in her eyes.

She always found herself staring at you from afar with that same look, the same look she and Minji talked about, the same reason why she isn't feeling like herself the past few weeks.

She couldn't shake those butterflies in her stomach, she isn't a fool, she knows what it means. She's just wasn't sure why and how.

She feels the spot next to next sink, indicating someone sat next to her. She didn't have to turn her head to look, she know who it was.

"Dani, there it is again." She heard Minji let out a deep sigh.

"Can't help it if she looks like that." Danielle replied, her eyes glued to your figure, putting the ear piece on and letting the staff members fix the wires and your clothes.

"I know, but you're making this hard on yourself."

"I'm not... I'm just—taking the time to think about this thoroughly."

"Thoroughly? Why, isn't she worth the risk?" Haerin popped out, sending Minji an apologetic smile after she flinched.

"She is. She's worth everything I have, I'm just afraid that I will hurt her in the future. Hurt her because I couldn't get myself together.." Danielle responded, giving Minji no time to scold Haerin for popping out so suddenly.

"Danielle, she's worried. She noticed how you distance yourself. She knows everything and she don't like it." Minji placed her hand on Danielle's shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze.

"I know."

"You have to talk to her."

"I know."

Minji sighed, her voice softening. "Dani, sometimes the best way to figure things out is to talk about them. You owe it to yourself and to her."

"I know, just give me time." Danielle's eyes couldn't help but softened at the sight of you smiling ang giggling at something Hyein said.

"You have time, just make sure that time doesn't run out." Minji replied gently, giving Danielle's shoulder a comforting squeeze.

Danielle sighed, her gaze still fixed on you. "It's just... she's so important to me. I don't want to mess this up."

Minji smiled, her tone supportive. "I understand, Dani. But sometimes, you have to take risks for the people you care about. Talk to her, let her know what's been going on. She deserves to hear it from you."

"I will, unnie."

Minji gave her a reassuring smile before leaving to annoy Hanni. Danielle's eyes lingered on you for what felt like eternity before the staffs announced that they're up on stage next.

May God have mercy on her poor heart, you're too beautiful for the world to see, they don't even deserve to see you. Before Danielle get lost in her thoughts again, you turn around, catching her eyes before giving her a small smile and leaving.

"Bro! We're up next, come on!" Hanni's loud voice called out to her.

"Yeah, coming." She muttered before standing up to join the rest of the girls.

The whole performance, her eyes always finds you, the fans noticed it, the girls, and of course you did. It confuses you, avoiding you but kept her eyes on you, what's wrong with her?

A question even herself she can't answer. She watches you dance flawlessly, entrance the audience with your voice, bring even the strongest men on their knees with your beauty.

She's down bad, she wants you and she can't do anything about it. Not until she fixes herself and her mistakes to be better for you.

Danielle felt a storm of emotions swirling inside her. Every time she looked at you, her heart ached with longing. She couldn't tear her gaze away from you, no matter how hard she tried. The connection she felt was undeniable, but her own insecurities and fears held her back.

As the performance continued, Danielle's resolve began to waver. She knew she couldn't keep avoiding you forever. Sooner or later, she would have to confront her feelings and find a way to bridge the gap that had grown between you.

And maybe, just maybe, she would find the courage to tell you how much you meant to her.

--

The night is cold, colder than usual. Maybe it's because it's winter. Snow falls from the sky, landing softly on the ground, creating a serene, white blanket over everything. The streetlights cast a warm glow, illuminating the snowflakes as they drift lazily down.

You pull your coat around yourself, breath visible in the chilly air, the snow crunch between your feet as you walk wherever they take you. It's Christmas tomorrow, it's not your favorite holiday but it's still the best.

You stare at the lights in front of you, the silly light shows of Christmas decorations twinkling in a multitude of colors. Each one seems to pulse with its own rhythm, creating a mesmerizing display. The festive cheer in the air contrasts with the turmoil in your heart, and you can't help but feel a bit overwhelmed.

The decorations are whimsical, with reindeer prancing and Santa Claus waving from rooftops. The trees are adorned with glittering ornaments and garlands, casting a warm, inviting glow. It's a scene straight out of a holiday movie, but your mind is elsewhere, caught up in thoughts of Danielle.

As you take in the lights, you hear footsteps approaching. Turning your head, you see Danielle walking towards you, her breath visible in the chilly air. She stops beside you, her gaze also drawn to the decorations.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" She said without looking at you.

"Yeah.." You muttered a response but you weren't looking at the decorations anymore. Your gaze is now on the girl beside you, watching the lights reflect in her eyes, making them seem to sparkle, adding to the magic of the moment.

Why is she here? Wasn't she supposed to be with Haerin and Hyein? Did she ditched them to be here with me? Why is she like this..? Thoughts ran through your head, wondering and wondering.

After weeks of avoiding me, why is she here now? You couldn't help but feel an ounce of anger. She can't just ignore you and then act like nothing had happened between you two.

She turned to you, her eyes soft and held some emotions you couldn't explain—was it guilt? Sadness? Love-what? Maybe anger—why is she angry?

Your eyes stares at her face, you couldn't help but feel a weird feeling in your stomach, it's tickling yet comforting. It's a lovely feeling, she's getting beautiful each passing seconds, won't be long until she officially became a Goddess.

"Y/n." She said softly, hearing your name fall from her tongue makes you see stars, you never liked your name, but when she says it. It sounds so beautiful, like a prayer in the warm night air.

You felt a surge of emotions, your heart racing at the sound of your name spoken with such tenderness. The way she looked at you, with a mixture of hope and vulnerability, made your breath catch in your throat.

"Danielle." You replied with the same tone, the same tenderness she had used when saying your name.

A shiver ran down her spine as she heard her name spoken with such affection. It felt like the world had stopped, leaving just the two of you in a bubble of warmth amidst the cold night air.

The snow continued to fall softly around you, each flake adding to the quiet beauty of the moment. Danielle's eyes were filled with a storm of emotions—guilt, hope, and something deeper that you couldn't quite place but made your heart beat faster.

"I've missed you." She admitted, her voice barely above a whisper.

You looked at her with a mixture of confusion and concern. "I never left, Dani. Why did you miss me?"

Danielle's eyes softened, a hint of sadness and vulnerability in her gaze. "It's not about you physically being here. It's about the connection we had, the closeness. I've been avoiding you because I was scared of my feelings. But in doing so, I felt like I lost you."

You felt a ache in your heart. Of course you missed her too, you want to be mad at her for avoiding you so suddenly. Maybe this is the chance for her to enlighten you why.

"I've missed you too. More than you know." You admitted, your voice tinged with both longing and frustration.

She felt it. Danielle felt the frustration in your voice, she's angry at herself for making you suffer her pain too. All she wanted for you was to be happy, but her distance affected you as well.

"I'm so sorry, my Y/n." Her voice trembling, vulnerability can be felt. "For distancing myself, for making you feel my pain too. I never meant for it to happen."

You stare at her in softly, the sincerity and remorse in her voice cutting through the frustration you had felt. You reached out, gently lifting her chin so her eyes met yours. Wiping the tear that feel from her beautiful eye.

"I thought having time alone with myself would help me realize that I want to be the best version of myself for you. You don't deserve the Danielle who shuts everyone out whenever she feels down. No, you deserve better—the one who will come to you when she feels down, the one who will never distance herself."

Your eyes filled with confusion, why is she telling you this? "Dani, what are you talking about?"

She choked up a sob, stopping herself from crying out loud. Her guilt is eating her alive, she doesn't have the strength to hide it anymore.

"I like you—wait no scratch that. I love you." She breath out, "I love you that's why I want to be better for you. I have bad habits, Haerin asked me why do I have to think this thoroughly? It's because I don't want to hurt you one way or another. I want you to have the Danielle you deserve. And right now, I am not the best version of myself. It sucks—I know, I hate it when you notices my mood before the others. hate it when you're there for me, hate you for being so understanding and beautiful, hate it when other people try to steal you from me, hate it when—"

She didn't have time to finish when you suddenly press your lips against hers. Effectively shutting her up, she stood frozen—unable to process.

For a moment, everything seemed to stand still. The world around you faded away, leaving just the two of you in that intimate, breathtaking moment. Danielle's eyes widened in surprise, but slowly, she began to relax into the kiss, her hands gently finding their way to your waist, while yours on her shoulders.

Before you two could get lost in each others lips, you forced yourself to pull away, your cheeks flushed red, from the cold and blush spreading across your face.

Danielle's eyes fluttered open, her own cheeks mirroring the same rosy hue. She looked at you with a mixture of surprise and longing, her breath coming in soft, visible puffs in the chilly air.

"I love you too." That's all Danielle need to pull you in for another kiss, pull you closer until there was no space left between you.

The warmth of her embrace and the softness of her lips made your heart race. The world around you seemed to disappear, leaving just the two of you in that perfect moment. The snow continued to fall gently, creating a serene and magical backdrop for your kiss.

When you finally pulled away, both of you were breathless, your cheeks flushed with a mix of cold and the intensity of your emotions. Danielle's eyes sparkled with happiness, and she smiled at you, her heart full of love.

"Please don't distance yourself again. My love, you're already the best version of yourself in my eyes, we can deal with anything as long as we're together. Promise me you won't do it again." You held out your pinky finger to her.

She smiled softly, the storm in her eyes now long gone, replaced by love and happiness. She interlocked her pinky finger with yours. "I promise."

"I wanna be yours." She whispered while staring into your eyes.

"You're already mine." You replied softly, a tender smile spreading across your face.

Danielle's eyes sparkled with happiness, and she felt a sense of peace wash over her. She couldn't be happier, and neither could you.

As you two shared your wonderful moment together, the girls watched from afar, Hyein was trying to bite into a candy cane, Haerin munched on cookies, while Hanni and Minji stood with pride smiles on their faces.

"How did you convinced Dani to finally talk to her?" Hanni asked, her eyes still glued to the two of you.

"I didn't, it's those two who did." Minji nodded towards the two younger members who's busy eating, earning an amuse chuckle from the other.

[bloodytittiez]

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hey guys [*gets shot*] I know I've never posted any of my writings before, even though I write fanfiction, but this has been collecting dust in my google docs page for nearly two years and it was too good to not share it with you my little kinky freaks/lh/aff (at least I think so)! I hope you enjoy this little smut fic - English isn't my first language so excuse some possible spelling and grammar errors, please... also, KEEP IN MIND THIS WAS A DRAFT! There's a lot of time skips and I doubt I'll ever finish it.

CONTENT WARNING: AFAB reader, vaginal sex, oral sex, teasing, heavy dirty talking, sex without condom, consensual non-consensual, phone sex, masturbation, public sex, porn with plot.

———

Red and blue lights flickering outside, tree branches tapping against the snowy windows of the sorority house. The soft, slow tunes and delicious scents of cinnamon and ginger cookies flowing in the air...

Christmas, such a family centered holiday where there's only place for laughs and sweet surprises, was completely ruined yet another year by him.

It was the fourth time in the night the moaner called. You could see your roommates gag at the blasphemies and curses the stranger yelled at the phone to each one of them– while you seemed to enjoy them in secret.

《Nasty… F-Filthy piggy. Bi-Billy has a big juicy fat cock he k-knows you’d love to suck on… I-It’s dripping wet and it f-fits in your mouth.》

You crossed your legs as ‘‘Billy’’ —you had no idea if that even was his actual name— spat nonsensical words for the sake of feeling some friction against your womanhood. His descriptions were so detailed that you could picture them perfectly in your head.

《Billy w-will kill each one of you… Tonight.》He breathed out in a way that felt almost a threat, his sentence getting distorted when it reached the other side of the line. Everyone could tell he was all tensed up for the way he gripped the phone.

《I can’t stand you anymore, you fucking pig!》

《Pig… P-piggy! Naughty piggy…》 The moaner repeated, mocking a very stressed out Jess Bradford.

《Jess.》 You interrupted the leader of your group with a serene expression, finally standing up from your seat when you felt her anxiety grow. 《Let me take care of the situation.》 You suggested while you took the device out of her hands before she would say anything, and covering the speaker you added something;

《Why don’t you guys go to bed? It’s way too late already.》

《But we can’t leave you alone with that creep!》 Jess exclaimed.

《Don’t worry about it. Someone has to confront him already and that’s going to be me.》 You answered, already building up enough courage to complete the task. 《Please.》 You looked up at the concerned eyes of every girl occupying the room while you could hear Billy talking to himself on the other side of the line. 《You girls need some rest. It’s been a long day.》

Jess and the rest stood there in silence, trusting your words. She gave you a small nod and parted her lips to articulate a silent ‘‘thank you’’ before leaving the room with relief. You knew she didn’t have enough energy to argue, and so did the rest.

You smiled when you returned to the call, grabbing the phone with distinguished elegance in your movements. A soft smile formed in your face and felt a sudden flock of butterflies inside of your stomach. It definitely wasn’t a good idea to play along with who you knew was a creep, but a part of you loved the thrill and danger in doing that. You could hear your sweet mother’s voice in your head begging to stop what you were doing as you answered Billy. To hell with her warnings of not picking up the phone to strangers!

Tonight was going to be different. May this be your very own Christmas gift…

《Hello, Billy.》 You tried not to come off as rude at first.

《Yes, yes… Hello there, my darling… It's so nice to hear your voice. You sound like an angelic creature.》

《Do you know who I am?》 You asked.

《 Yes... Yes, I know you. The quietest slut of the bunch. Billy loves to see your pretty ass swaying around when you walk. Yes… You filthy, nasty whore love to tease Billy’s cock. I know that well. Billy saw this naughty piggy touch herself… S-saw you cry out for Billy in the intimacy of your room.》

You couldn’t help but fluster at his obscene rambling and switched the phone to your other hand. You were the kind of person that would move around constantly when you felt nervous about something. In this case, a stranger that saw you masturbate plenty of times before. Poor you… How many times exactly did Billy hear you pronounce his name under muffled moans? You could feel your heart rate at the top of your throat, flooded in embarrassment as he playfully mocked you.

But; back to his confession though, you definitely couldn’t deny something that was completely true and after spending some seconds in silence you finally spoke up, a cigarette being held in between two of your shaky fingers so you could calm yourself down.

《Would you like me to do it now? Touch myself for you?》

《Yes. Yes. YES!》 He demanded in an almost feral manner.

You nodded in response to his pleas as the flame of your lighter lit the cigarette and kept paying attention to his delicious blasphemies. You were enjoying the moment more than you would like to admit. 《Touch yourself f-for B-Billy...》 He insisted, despair breaking in his voice. 《I want to hear your sweet moans like when you finger yourself alone.》

You held the phone between your ear and your shoulder, letting one of your hands completely free and trailing down to your skirt as the mysterious man dictated. 《Roll your skirt up… Billy wants to see your juicy ass aswell.》

Your pussy soon got filled with two of your fingers, exploring every inch of your insides.

You were so warm…

So wet…

It was hard to believe how turned on you could get by the phone calls of a creep. Being manipulated in such ways by a man that you'd never seen before.

《I'm doing it, Billy…》 You sighed, moaning his name under your soft breath. 《I'm touching myself.》

The mysterious man groaned and panted on the other side of the line, incapable of forming coherent words. 《Move the phone down to your pretty slick… Billy wants to hear the sound of your wet cunt.》

His voice sent chills down your spine while you placed the speaker close to your pussy, fingering it with oh, such passion in every one of your circular motions. Obviously, you made sure that the sound of the friction of your digits was audible enough for Billy.

《Fuck…》 He groaned once more. 《I want to taste your pretty pink cunt… Oh Y...Yes… I will. I bet it tastes as sweet as you do. B-Billy wants to lick your tits and your round juicy ass.》 The man chuckled with a childish tone as you could hear him stroking his length while getting indulged in his fantasies. 《Suck on your nipples too… Squeeze those tits ‘till they turn red like two christmas ornaments…》

His words made you shove your fingers even deeper in you. You were getting too carried away right when you heard the mysterious man hang up the phone.

You grabbed it close to your ear, wondering what happened.

《Hello? Billy? Are you still there?》

Only the empty beeping of the phone answered you, leaving you completely disappointed and wet.

You took a deep puff of your cigarette and hung up the phone in return when you got tired of listening to the dull melody of the lost connection, then mumbled something and decided to go to your room for some rest too. Maybe Jess and Barb were right after all, there was no point on wasting your time on that fucking moaner guy you all couldn’t stand.

You turned off the lights outside, blew the candles in the living room and grabbed a little candy cane from the coffee table. You thought the night was over and your only comfort now was a little sugary treat.

But, when you suddenly walked into a dark corner of the stairs, a pair of big hands pinned you on the wall. An audible yelp escaped your lips as you heard a man's voice speaking in an attempt to reassure you. It was the same one you'd always hear on the phone.

《Shh… S...Shhh… It's okay… It's me, Billy.》

The man caressed your cheeks in a sloppy manner and covered your mouth. 《Pretty piggy… Where do you think you are going? Billy isn't finished with you yet… There are so many nasty things Billy wants to do to you…》

You tried to pick small bits of his face in the darkness when he slowly released you from his grasp. It felt rather strange to see him in person.

A tall figure partially hidden in the shadows, green eyes that would stare directly into your soul and long, curly hair caressing the sides of his forehead. Billy's description didn't fit his personality at all. He had the looks of a gentleman but the mouth of the devil. Although; you had to be honest about something. You still wanted to fuck Billy despite of his looks. They didn't matter much to you when his low and menacing tone is what drove you absolutely crazy for him at first.

His hot breath hitting against your neck soon turned you on again.

《Billy… I thought you weren't interested in me anymore. Why did you hang up on me?》You pouted, wanting to tease him as an act of revenge.

The way you said those words, with such a sweet yet innocent tone made the man react in ways you exactly wanted him to.

《N...No. Billy came a-all the way here to see you. Billy craves your body.》

You dragged his fingers across the line of your lips as an excuse to turn him on as well. You liked the way he sounded, so nervous. He could break down at any moment and you liked that.

The warmth of his digits along the surface of your puffy lips, bringing goosebumps across your whole body. You parted your lips and spoke again.

《How much do you crave my body?》 You attempted to lick his index finger to which got you a slight moan in response.

《S-So much...》

《Show me then, Billy. I’ve been wanting to do this for the longest time…》

You finally confessed while you rolled your tongue out of your mouth and placed his finger on top. You sucked on it gently from the base to the tip.

———

Billy yanked your hair with such strength, dragging your puffy velvet lips to his dripping cock. His tip forced them open and soon his shaft filled your mouth hole.

Strands of hair tangled up around his fingers, both of you now locked together for god knows how long. You made the man shiver with anticipation as his tip brushed the back of your throat, leaving it hot and irritated.

You couldn't help but gag and drool repeatedly for he didn't give you a single break. But you didn't mind. You finally had what you craved.

‘‘Billy's juicy fat cock…’’

His words showed up in your brain, accompanied by a clear image of the cock that was stuffing your mouth in that very moment. Your horny mind couldn't help but recap every single quote that made you fall madly in love with him. Blame it on your degrading kink as a result of many failed relationships.

Billy bent you over with the same strength as before, ripping a yelp out of your throat while you grabbed the handrails so you wouldn't fall down the stairs and cause a scene.

Your ass now completely exposed was facing him, rubbing against his wet cock.

The man leaned over you and hands crawled around your stomach to hold you firmly as he would start rocking his hips at a slow pace. His left hand roamed free around your belly and later your clit, while his right one stayed busy pinching and twisting your nipples ever so slightly.

Billy could make you scream at any given time.

He could definitely break you. Turn you into his pretty little fucktoy, but having sex in a set of stairs definitely required some precaution.

《Billy. We should move somewhere else…》You gasped as soon as you could catch some air and already felt your whole body sore from standing up there. 《What if someone wakes up and sees us here?》

《If someone sees us…》 He repeated. 《I…It won't matter. I want them to see YOU moaning f-for Billy. Want them t…to see just how good you can take a cock.》

He purred into your ear as he covered your mouth to force your jaw open widely for him. Holding your breasts better around his hands he rubbed them together and squeezed them. You felt his wet cock pressing against your folds, desperately trying to make its way inside of you. God it felt so good to finally experience how all of his sinful threats came true one by one. Little whines came out of your mouth when you tried to accommodate to his size but he didn't let you. He was more than aware of his power and chuckled playfully.

《Billy's cock feels so good inside of your wet cunt. You are taking it so well. So tremendously well. Don't stop squealing, my little dirty piggy.》

You obeyed and let out a bunch of more moans caused by the pain of quick and deep thrusts. It was embarrassing to echo your satisfaction to an empty living room... And definitely hoped the girls closed their doors upstairs.

———

Billy noticed the red and white swirled candy that you were holding in your hands and took it from you while he turned your body around so that you could face him now.

Still holding your waist, he licked the candy cane until it would remain a little damped. You were staring at his eyes in a mix of excitement and curiosity the whole time and snickered.

He spreaded your folds and shoved the candy inside.

《Billy's gonna make this wet cunt even tastier.》

———

The chorus of early birds singing outside and gentle sunrays kissing your face woke you up the next morning. You stretched your arms, your legs and then… A pinch on your sore waist fully woke you up. You remembered what happened last night soon after that and smiled.

You sat up in bed and noticed a candy cane wrapped its plastic with a small green bow and a note. You had no idea when and how it got there, perhaps Claude; the sorority cat stole it from the silver platter downstairs and left it in your bed as a mere coincidence. You elongated your arm to pick it up and brushed strands of hair behind your ears to read it better.

It said ''Merry Christmas. With love, Billy'' in a surprisingly tidy calligraphy.

His name made your heart flutter and cheeks aroused when you remembered more details about last night.

You unwrapped the candy cane and tasted it, its sweet flavor melting in your tongue.

Maybe Christmas wasn't completely ruined this year.

[random-twst-things]

The Sweet Painter of Twisted things (Pt. 1)

Hi annon! Love the concept. It's no bother at all, I do love to write after all!! Ty for the request and I apologize for taking so long 😭✨🍬 (I hope you like it!)

Characters involved: Riddle, Leona, Azul pt.1 (Kalim, Jamil, Vil, Idia, Malleus pt.2)

Pairings: Riddle, Leona, Azul pt 1 (Kalim, Jamil, Vil, Idia, Malleus x Female reader pt.2) (Separate)

Warnings: Mentions of eerie/gory paintings

Word count: 1,630

Notes: you know what? I'm just gonna post it now and finish the rest in a different post, I don't want y'all to be kept waiting any longer 😭✨🍬

More notes: I'll be posting Pt.2 whenever I have time! I will say though, I have no idea how to write for some of the characters in Pt.2 😀✨🍬

When you said you painted and wished to show him your art, Riddle had to admit he was a tad bit (a lot) excited to see

So, when you showed him your art he was absolutely bewildered.

You, the sweetest person he has ever had the chance in meeting, paints things that could cause nightmares.

Obviously, he isn't going to say that aloud, he has manners, but dear seven, how unexpected it was for him.

He's seen art before. He's been to museums by his mother to teach him strictly of the arts and the "rules" she put in place for them to determine how well a painting is.

It's been years since his mother taught him such things, and she only did it so often, and after time, those rules of art set by his mother have dwindled.

He's been able to go to museums before with Trey as a way to calm down when things are too much. Luckily, Trey was able to explain to Riddle how there are many forms of art and how it art doesn't necessarily have rules itself.

So it's safe to say he's a bit more well-versed in paintings now, even though he still finds it a bit difficult when there's no rules to follow (a habit hard to get rid of)

Now, his reaction all depends on what painting and image your showing him

He will ask you questions about why you would paint such uncanny things such as:

Why did you paint this? What caused you to begin painting such eerie things? What Inspiration were you given to paint this particular piece?

And many more questions about technique and practical things.

He can't say that he's a fan of these types of paintings, but he can say that he thinks you're very talented to be able to make such paintings

He'll praise how well done or real your painting(s) looks.

He's going to be a bit concerned about you, though, and he shows that by (trying to) subtly asking if you're okay

"What gave you the inspiration to draw this?" Riddle asks, the worry in his tone being quite evident even through his attempts in hiding it. "Have you witnessed such things for inspiration?" He asks again, his voice laced with even more worry than before.

"What? No!" You stand up from your seat to get closer to Riddle. "It's not like that," you laugh lightly, shaking your hands in the air. "I just happened to see a rotting piece of meat in the cafeteria kitchen one time while passing by."

Riddle breathes a sigh of relief he didn't know he was holding in. Bro was stressing and worrying.

I say this in the nicest way possible to us all, but this man does not care but-!

Leona doesn't care in a sense like "I wanna show you something!" "Alright hurry it up and show me".

Maybe he's a bit smug that you're showing him something you like to do.

Anyways, when you said you wanted to show him your painting(s) he was being smug.

He didn't have any set expectations to what type of things you painted or what your style was.

Him seeing the eerie or gory painting didn't surprise him as much as Riddle either.

He doesn't have much to say, but this guy is still smug and is definitely showing it now.

Why? The guys got weird motives and definitions of respect and pride so we'll never know.

His does wonder how you acquired such Inspiration to paint like this.

He's not too curious about it to the point where he'll try to find out or becomes worried.

Again, he is smug and prideful but it's for you

He feels prideful FOR you. He's smug about you being able to paint such gory or eerie things FOR you.

(Bros so smitten with you)

You set your canvas/notebook down carefully against one of the plants nearby, careful not to get it dirty or damaged.

Leona lays there, back towards you, unbothered under the shade of a plant, but not for long as you bring your finger near his cheek and begin to poke.

Poke.

Poke.

PokePokePokePokePokePokePoke.

Leona swats your hand away, but not harshly. His tail swings left to right faster then he was asleep, another sign he's awake.

He looks at you, irked that you disturbed his so-called much needed nap. He glares at you, but his eyes lack the malice in them to even consider it threatening. You look at him innocently, hands behind your back as to show it wasn't you. (He knows better, only you would ever try to wake him up like that)

He sighs deeply. "What is it herbivore?" He asks as he shifts slightly to get into a more comfortable position to get a better view of you. You turn your body slightly to grab the canvas you set down behind you, careful not to accidentally show Leona just yet. "I wanna show you something," you beam, you're more excited then you thought you'd be showing him, for the first time, your most recent painting.

Leona's tail begins to swish even faster, thumping against the leaves of the plants nearby. His tail gives away that his curiosity has been piqued. Yet his face remains unchanged, besides the slight quirk of his eyebrow in questioning.

You turn the canvas around for Leona to see.

And there it is

The smirk

The smug

The eyes of pride *sound effects*

His smirk seems to widen even more as he looks at the painting and then back at you. "Looks nice herbivore, ya got anymore?"

You excitedly nod your head, "yeah, I do. Wanna see them?", you ask, gripping your painting, even more excited then before to show him.

Leona nods his head languidly while slowly closing his eyes, "sure, but after I finish this nap", he brings his arms down and begins to get comfortable. He softly pats his stomach, "Come, sleep".

Azul knows you paint, he knows it's been a hobby of yours for a while now.

How does he know? Doesn't matter. Does he know what exactly the contents of your paintings are? No

His curiosity has been eating away at him. He was so very curious on what his darling was capable of

So, when you first told him that you wished to show him your paintings, he was elated. His curiosity will finally be quelled.

He may or may not have a set expectations of what you paint. Something sweet, something calm or maybe something like he'd find at a museum of old paintings.

What he saw was the complete opposite to say the least.

He's not disappointed, no, he's just shocked.

He's amazed. He's taken aback. He's a lot of emotions.

.....would you be willing to, perhaps, sell these paintings? Many people out there would be willing to buy, and the profits would be even and-

Old habits die hard, I suppose 🤷🏽‍♀️

You led Azul by the hand to your room/drawing room, much slower than he would like as he wished to see your paintings as soon as possible.

"Azul, i can feel you twitching in anticipation just by holding your hand," you laughed lightly. He sighed, bringing his free hand to his temple to calm his nerves. "I'm sorry, dear, but it feels as if you're walking slower just to build up anticipation," "Maaaybeee~". Azul chuckles at your antics.

Finally, after Azuls definition of agonizing seconds. He visibly relaxed as he saw the covered canvas. "My, you really know how to keep me on my toes", ",I most certainly do". You left go of his hand and stand next to the covered canvas. "Ready?", you put your hands on the sheet. Azul held his breath and nodded.

You clench the cover and quickly pull it off. You turn to face Azul to gouge his reaction. That reaction was him frozen in place, still holding his breath (you'd begun to think how he still hasn't passed out) "Azul?" You try to call out to him.

He slowly walks up to your painting, still holding his breath. He reaches out and touches the edges of the canvas delicately, scared he we're to break it if he put too much pressure. You watch his careful movements. You watch as his eyes rake over your painting as if he could take the painting and store it into his memory box. "Azul?" You try calling out again, only this time he responds.

He let's out a shaky breath, "it looks -" he turns his head to fade you. "It looks magnificent, dear," his words were barely above a whisper. You stand there absolutely frozen and shocked. Nobody has ever quite thought this kind of painting would be 'magnificent' before.

"Really?" He turns his head back at the painting."Yes, the detail is vert intricate, and it feels so eerie. It's as if you were truly there." You stare at him bewildered, mouth slightly agape.

He puts his hand on his chin in a thinking position. The gears turn in his head. He turns to face you so quickly that you'd think he'd have snapped his neck on accident. "Have you ever considered selling these?" He asks, with a twinkle in his eyes.

"Sell them?... No, I never really thought of that." You bring your fingers to your chin, now thinking as well. "Well, I'll say many would be lining up the door to buy these wonderful paintings!""Really?"

"Yes! With such talent and my business skills, we could -" and there goes the business man into his spiral of possibilities.

[andikiramman]

wet n' wild, caitlyn kiramman x maid!reader

cw: cait is kinda mean and likes hurting you

"shut up... shut up and take it."

caitlyn was being quite mean to you, and she knew that, but your feelings weren't at the forefront of her worries at the moment. after getting into yet another argument with her mother, she just needed a means of releasing all of her pent up anger (and maybe some revenge for all the stress her mother's stubbornness had caused her).

and what better way to do that than to fuck one of their maids in her mother's study, on her very own desk, at that?

caitlyn took a moment to observe your current state. after being given three very intense orgasms back to back, you appeared visibly out of it; your eyes could barely focus, and tiny whimpers escaped your lips with each deep breath you took as you tried to catch your breath. caitlyn bit her lip at the sight of the bite marks that were scattered throughout your form, the one on your neck even bleeding from a bite that went a bit deeper than expected.

maybe if you were her lover, she'd feel bad for treating you like nothing but a ragdoll, but you were not her lover, were you?

she curled the three fingers that she had lodged deep into your abused cunt, and you cried out in response, your back arching and your hands desperately searching for something to hold on to.

caitlyn roughly grabbed your neck, squeezing as if she was trying to get you to pop. "i told you to shut up, didn't i?" she grumbled. "it's almost like you want the other servants to hear us..."

you whined, shaking your head despite her unrelenting grip. she let go, opting to cover your mouth with her hand instead.

"then do as i say, and fucking take it."

her thrusts were deep, and she made sure to hit your g-spot each time her long fingers were buried to the hilt. she knew she was doing a good job, too; each thrust forced a muffled, yet delicious moan out of you, and your legs tightened around her waist like a fucking lifeline.

caitlyn relished in this imbalance of power she had over you. she wasn't sure when this kink had developed, but she sure as hell wasn't complaining about it, either. she bent down to take one of your nipples into her mouth, sucking on it harshly before biting. your body jerked, a muted cry ripping from your throat. tears welled up in your eyes, flowing down the sides of your face and onto the desk below you.

"aww, did that hurt?" she cooed mockingly as she lifted herself off of you. you nodded with a sniffle, and caitlyn couldn't help but find your teary-eyed expression adorable.

"oh, well that's quite a shame, isn't it?" she continued. "you and i both know you've been enjoying the pain thus far, don't suddenly change your mind now."

and with that, she began pounding into you, her deft fingers stretching you out and no doubt sending waves of burning pleasure throughout your body. your eyes rolled to the back of your head, and you clawed at caitlyn's forearm, your nails digging angry lines into her skin.

"what's the matter, are you cumming again?" she smirked.

you rapidly shook your head, a slight panic evident in your eyes.

no?

before caitlyn could react, the floodgates burst, and a powerful stream of clear fluid shot out from within you; you ended up drenching caitlyn's forearm and outfit.

"what the fuck?!" caitlyn exclaimed, quickly pulling away from you in shock.

you whimpered, and she watched in silent confusion as you sat up to study the area around you. realizing what had just occurred, you pouted in embarrassment.

"oh... i-i've made such a mess..."

it was a blur, the way caitlyn found herself surging towards you and mashing her lips against yours for a kiss. she grabbed your throat harshly, biting down on your bottom lip as she let out a throaty hum.

"that was so fucking hot," she growled salaciously as she lowered you onto the desk once more. "let's see how many more times i can get you to do that..."

a/n: teehee first arcane post! thx for reading, and tell me what you think! :D

[flyinguraniumrod]

A thing that I have never seen anyone bring attention to: the lines under Cyberverse Astrotrain's eyes

In 3d it really looks like dimples under the eyes, yes

(the pic is better without the zoom buuttt at least the thing is more visible, also, I don't feel like looking for screenies in the show rn)

I've been feeling the need to mention this for quite a long time and I got reminded of that today rkjxwkktkgnrnt

Let's take these two elements of his face's design into consideration: the lines that go under his eyes and the lines that go from the sides of his mouth. One knows what those are when translated to human standards.

On one hand, they can indicate greater age, being tired. And on the other one, they could additionally be tied to severe and long lasting stress, even trauma, which could have come from his experiences in the universe he originates from.

I shall also add another thing that I have just noticed: his eyes seem to be rotated outwards quite a bit? Unless, it's just a matter of perspective in this one scene... oh wait it did turn out that it's just the perspective but I will keep this part here anyways, lol

That's the thing which makes me one of the people who wish we knew more about that alternate reality, in which Megatron wins the Great War and creates a master race of Decepticons, additionally getting rid of those who he deemed unecessary. Honestly, if there were a few or so episodes set in it, exploring the world, showing the processes that had happened among the Decepticon ranks, the fates of those who resisted, I would have watched them with excitement (well, I'd probably even want 2 whole seasons of that, lol).

Coming back to the topic of Astrotrain, saying that he looks tired is an understatement. He was kept close and abused for milions of years, even tortured. He has a fear of coming back to his original universe, his old master (therefore, the original Cyberberse Megatron has means of threatening him). Addtionally, it is extremely possible that he lost a few 'cons who were close or even very close to him during his universe's Megatron's purges and executions. Astrotrain is a triple-changer whose massive size combined with the shuttle alt mode make him a very valuable asset, as it is obvious that transporting troops is a crucial element. (Well, transporting the high-command could also be an important thing to such a tyrant as "the other" Megatron, hoh)

And yes, all that while keeping in mind the way he acts, the sadism in his personality, the way how he likes to joke.

All of that makes Cyberverse Astrotrain (and maybe even Astrotrain as a character in general, not just the one from this show) yet another triple-changer with a considerable amount of character and character depth building potential. I shall repeat this: I am of the opinion that the triple-changers are really underused in this franchise, even though I know that the reason why they don't appear so often could be how difficult it is to make decent toys of them, lol. Oh and I am not going to forget about the potential they have in fights (especially Blitzwing tbh)

Oh, I will also come back to the very first line of this yapping session: I haven't been on tumblr for too long so I shall ask: if there is some truly splendid annalysis of Astrotrain then I would really appreciate a link to it if that's possible! (Could also be that of any other triple-changer)

Man, would be noice to see a post with Cyberverse Astrotrain that isn't just about shipping him with Dead End, hahah /hj

However, lastly, I would like to mention @/elili0000's quite-old artwork regarding the story about Cyberverse Astrotrain and their own version of Cyberverse Blitzwing that they had made. It's been a while but I remember that I found it amazing, lol

[glendasguidance-inactive]

🫖 pick a picture ☕️🧣🍪

Full Moon in Cancer

₊˚ʚᗢ₊˚✧ﾟhow to pick // disclaimers ✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡♡˚

Here are some messages for you this full moon <3

spread: Biddy Tarot Full Moon spread // decks: Rider Waite tarot, Find Your Purpose by Jess Sanders

Pile 1 / Pile 2 / Pile 3

Inhale, exhale 3x, pick

★ personal readings ★ support me ★ other readings ★

★ check out this reading! → USA Post-Election (2024): How can you support yourself, your community, and Earth in the present moment and in the years to come? (for US citizens and non-US citizens - for every Earthling <3) ★

Pile 1

What have you created and manifested since the new moon?

Ace of Swords - You've been realizing how much you don't allow yourself to think certain thoughts and speak your mind to the people around you. You've started speaking to yourself in an encouraging way, and that has been allowing you to gain clarity on your worth and value as a person, grow instead of hide yourself away, live in the present moment, communicate much better, create the life you want. This is new to you, so you kinda have Bambi legs right now, but that's okay. Don't be discouraged by your mistakes or anxieties, the more you consider your own opinions and use your voice, the more confident you will feel. Also, be smart about speaking truth to power. People who have power over others often do not operate with fairness and justice in mind, and will punish people that question it or their choices. Which isn't fair. And I'm not going to enable that behavior by telling you "that's just how the world works" - what I'm telling you is to think before you act on an impulse. If you realize it's not safe to act on your first desire, what is a way you can still achieve the same goal while protecting yourself? If you feel it's right to be confrontational, be prepared to handle reaction and backlash. Like the imagery on the card, think of these moments like sword fights - these are moments to be a samurai, not a novice. Let your friends help you.

Where are you now?

Judgement reversed - I believe there's been malicious gossip going around about you, and you've been sensing it. You probably realized when the people you get along with the best have been distancing themselves from you, and not acting as friendly with you as they normally do. I'm sensing more strongly with this pile that you may be receiving a lot of blame from a group you're in (family, a friend group, work, volunteer group, etc). And that it's a reaction to you attempting to hold someone accountable for hurting you or others, or enforce the agreed upon guidelines. Whatever it is, it's unfair. You feel astonished by this wake up call. But, the shock of the ice cold truth of what these people's true colors are is giving you an opportunity to have something you've needed for a long time. A choice to make for yourself. I sense you've usually gone with what other people decide, feeling too anxious to make decisions or believing your role in life is to follow what the leaders (or men in general) tell you to do. Baby girl you are NOT a plastic bag drifting through the wind. What is in your own best interest? Following that isn't selfish, it's self preservation.

What is coming into your conscious awareness?

9 of Swords reversed - You've realized you've gotta let go of a lot of stress and stressful people. You can't live like this anymore. It's been hurting you. You were putting a looot on your plate that wasn't for you to take care of - it was other peoples' responsibility. You probably had kind intentions and just wanted to help, and it was very kind you did that. People took advantage of your innocence. You'll have a "fuck it, I'm done attitude. This is good because there's nothing for you to feel guilt or burdened by. Moving forward as you heal, reevaluate your needs, wants, and values in relationships. Don't list things that make relationships functional as the top things you're looking for. Trust, honesty, kindness, patience, etc aren't "high standards" (a bullshit phrase imo), they're foundational to every healthy relationship. First, learn or review how to recognize basic green flags in people, and then learn what traits you like and appreciate (humor, spontaneity vs planners, night owls vs morning birds, club goers or book worms, outdoorsy vs indoorsy, etc). Accept help and support from others at this time, you might be surprised at who helps you / is a safe person.

Quote Ask yourself what is really important and then have the courage to build your life around your answer. - Lee L. Jampolsky Affirmation I am guided by what I value most. Journal What are my top five values?

🦢 ♥︎ much love - Glenda ♥︎ 🦢

★☮︎★ support people affected by Jan 2025 LA wildfires ★☮︎★ support incarcerated firefighters ★☮︎★

Pile 2

What have you created and manifested since the new moon?

6 of Pentacles - Did you know that life can be good again? Probably not for a while. You've recently spent time around children or saw children playing and helping each other. This hit you with some sweet nostalgia, making you remember playing, being silly, and having fun - and how you could make any mundane moment playful, silly, and fun. You've realized you can still do that right now. Fun is always here, we just have to make it. And isn't it fun to make it? And yes, the world can be kind.

Where are you now?

3 of Cups - You're fuckin' live laugh loving your life - go you!! You're partying and being silly with your friends, going on adventures, and being a goofy goober. You're connecting with new friends, and making new friends along the way. If you don't currently have friends, this is your time to make them. You won't connect with everyone you meet, and that okay. The kind, safe, loving, fun friends you haven't met yet are waiting for you to come say hi.

What is coming into your conscious awareness?

Queen of Wands - This is how you become a badass, a boss ass bitch, slay queen pussy boss boots house down serving cunt. Just like with self love, how we learn we are lovable by being loved by others and accepting their affections, the same goes for confidence. I guess they’re one in the same really. When you have fun, and then others positively respond and have fun with you, it reinforces with you that you are good as you are and how wonderful your light is. It gives you protection from people who try to dim it - they can’t make you believe you should. So go make friends, and call up the ones you have. Making your own fun is empowering you to make your own life, and you’re growing into yourself. How exciting it is to find out what you’ll do, what you’ll make, and learn more about yourself. How magical it is to constantly discover goodness and kindness and love everywhere again. You are ever expansive and love is infinite. 🌌

Quote Just don't give up trying to do what you really want to do. Where there is love and inspiration, I don't think you can go wrong. - Ella Fitzgerald Affirmation I will experience challenges, but I will never let them stop me from doing what I love. Journal How have I been able to overcome challenges in the past?

🦢 ♥︎ much love - Glenda ♥︎ 🦢 ★☮︎★ support people affected by Jan 2025 LA wildfires ★☮︎★ support incarcerated firefighters ★☮︎★

Pile 3

What have you created and manifested since the new moon?

Chariot reversed and 3 of Swords - You finally got the care you’ve needed, but it also comes with a significant life change, and that involves grief. I believe most of you got a new mobility aid. If not, then there’s something about a car, bike, or public transit. Because I got an image of a wheelchair very strongly in my head, I’m going to focus on mobility aids and disability moving forward in the reading. I’m sure all you’ve been wishing for has been freedom of movement. You seemed to have had a specific wish though, like for your disability to be gone. Instead, you got a mobility aid. To you, this feels like limitation and restriction. I’m not saying “you’re handicapable!” or that other “inspirational” crap able-bodied people say. What I am saying is that this mobility aid is your freedom of movement - maybe for sometimes, maybe forever. It is a blessing to have one at all. Think of all the kind inventors making stuff so people can be independent and live! How wonderful is that? But I’m know it’s hard to shift to gratitude when you’re grieving. Let yourself cry and be angry and feel it all. It’s hard realizing how vulnerable you are and how much care you need, especially if you’ve been neglected most of your life or created an identity around being hyper-individualistic. Do you have a fear that people won’t help you? That’s very real, many disabled people are treated like garbage, the world can be pretty inaccessible, and right now barely anyone gets a Ms. Rona booster (the least one can do if they refuse to wear a mask). So feel and write and paint and express all your feelings about it. It’s all real and valid. Other people could be dealing with receiving a mobility aid they were excited for, but it’s not working, and it’s difficult to get repairs or replacements. Others felt excited to finally get one, but are grieving an unexpected feeling of loss of freedom because of the change. Maybe your home isn’t accessible for you now. My advice is still the same.

Where are you now?

10 of Pentacles - You’ve started to get connected with disability support groups and disability justice groups. You’ve been learning how to use your mobility aid, how to do repairs, how to make your home accessible or find a place that is accessible, how to raise money and get financial support, how to get around town, and overall do what you need to do. You’re making connections with new wonderful people who make your life better than it was before. You’re learning what community is and what it means to have one. I feel like someone has shown you how to decorate your mobility aid so it’s more fun and ✨you✨. Get crafty! 🧶🎨🪡 You’re humbled by all the love you’re receiving just because you exist, that you don’t have to “earn” it. That’s how love has always worked, you just didn’t know yet.

What is coming into your conscious awareness?

5 of Swords reversed - You’re no longer engaging in battles that make 0 progress for your relationships, and only make you feel hurt and exhausted from the stress. You’re letting go of eugenist believes you’ve been taught to have, and drawing strict boundaries with eugenists / people with eugenist & ableist beliefs. You’re analyzing what you have have time for, what you have spoons for, and frankly you feel good cutting all that harmful crap out. You’re learning how precious your peace is, and that it’s worthy of protection, respect, and regard.

Quote Your purpose or passion or "thing" doesn't have to become your work. It doesn't have to be something you make money from. Sometimes the things we love doing need space to be what they are without having to make them into something formalized. - Dr. Rebecca Ray Affirmation I don't have to make money for it to matter. Journal What did I love doing as a child that I no longer make time for?

🦢 ♥︎ much love - Glenda ♥︎ 🦢 ★☮︎★ support people affected by Jan 2025 LA wildfires ★☮︎★ support incarcerated firefighters ★☮︎★

header image: click here // footer image: Jan Brett's book The Mitten // pngs: click here // dividers: click here // I do not consent to my writing, blog’s likeness, or anything associated with my work, to be used to teach any machine learning software and artificial intelligence for any purpose.

[mysticdoodles]

hi i saw a post about the fish playing with the human child and even though your addition to that post is 3 years old by now i would love to hear more about ftm sheephead fish :3 (no pressure btw!)

Fish curiosity, in my inbox?? It's more likely than I think, apparently! xD

First off, there's actually multiple fish dubbed 'sheephead'! There's the sheepshead- note the extra S in there- and they look like this:

And yes those are their teeth. Horrifying tbh, but they're very good at what they do- crushing invertebrates and other shelled snacks! They're an Atlantic species that sticks to temperate and warmer waters, and they max out at about half a meter in length.

That's not the fish we're talking about today. The focus of today is the California sheephead wrasse- note the lack of a second S- also known as the 'sheephead' for short. Not confusing at all! We definitely don't bash our heads into walls over the naming conventions and lack of record-keeping of our scientist predecessors.

THIS is the sheephead wrasse, the species of the lovely and now Tumblr-famous Red! :D With a length of up to a FULL meter, they're a whole different size class of fish! They can be found along the west coast USA from the Baja Peninsula all the way up to Monterey, and dwell almost exclusively in kelp forests and nearby environments. I will use one of Red's pics as an example of female coloration-

The lighting isn't great but you can see how her body is streamlined, and besides the white underside of the jaw, has a salmon-pink coloration! Females can be pink or a dull silver-beige. And much like other large marine wrasse, MALES have a drastically different appearance.

This thing is built like a damn tank!! Sheephead are a species of wrasse that shift colors to gain those striking black scales and physically bulk up when becoming males- because guess what? ALL OF THEM ARE BORN FEMALE! By default, all male California Sheephead are FTM trans :) They use that bulky head and extremely tough set of jaws to not only hunt their preferred prey- mollusks, gastropods, and bivalves, etc- but also to bash and chomp down on rival males. This one has won many battles, look at that scarred up muzzle!

The sex change is determined by several factors, as it's not guaranteed all sheephead will eventually become males. Because sheephead school in a harem system- many females to very few males- in order to maximize pressure of stronger offspring, the biggest and healthiest sheephead male will drive out competition from the school. Naturally, a sheephead that lives longer and gains a greater size will have a much higher chance of shifting from a female to a male, if the conditions are right. Stress induced from competition can suppress the hormones that stimulate this transition in females, so they're less likely to gain size and shift from female to male if there's already strong competition taking place. However, in the event there are too few males to mate with the females, or no males present at all, the biggest female will start transitioning to fill the empty slot! It's a long process that can take as few as a couple months, or up to years, depending on resources available.

Conversely, if there are TOO MANY males, they can revert back into females! This process also takes a long time, and is a lot more rare to witness, especially because right now male California sheephead in particular are being spear-fished into becoming an Endangered species :c Sheephead adult males in good condition are considered a trophy animal in spear-fishing and similar marine trophy hunting off the West coast, and because males in particular are being targeted, the gene pool is being reduced when it wrecks the harem structure of schools.

As a fun fact- they're also an incredibly smart fish, and can form relationships with humans, as demonstrated with me and sweetiepie Red cx There's many documented cases of large marine wrasses forming long-term friendships with divers! Here's a humphead wrasse that made friends with a diver she learned would crack snails open for her with a hammer:

I don't work at the facility with Red anymore, but I currently work with two unnamed adult male sheephead, and once again they both like me and seem to despise all my coworkers, even if I never had the opportunity to train them like I did with little Red xD They pick favorites I guess? Now if only I could make friends with the garibaldi...

[beifong-brainrot]

your analyses of Lin came to mind the other day when I saw someone post about how “Lin should be able to smack Korra at least once.” And like. It’s not just one post, it seems to be a common ‘jokey’ attitude in the fandom, and…it’s really interesting how much the fandom loves Lin acting violent and aggressive towards everyone - particularly against Korra, who acts in a similar “aggressive” manner but not nearly as shitty (imo), but the fandom seems to despise her for it.

So I was wondering if you have any thoughts specifically on Lin and Korra’s relationship? Both in canon and how the fandom treats them?

Oh yeah, I think I've seen that post! I've honestly been wanting to do more Lin metas but have been holding off because back when I posted a lor of Suyin defences I got a not insignificant amount of nasty anonymous asks, and I know that Lin is beloved by the fandom so while I make my passive aggressive comment from time to time, actually dwelling on the subject is a bit of a gambit.

Honestly, it's not even that I dislike Lin. I actually enjoyed her character a fair amount when I first watched the show and was totally on board with the fandom loving this character. But eventually I got so tired of the constant takes about how everyone in Lin's life is soooo mean to her and how she never did anything wrong and she's secretly just a lil bean , she's just a biy grumpy guys.

And, oh, the jokey comments about how Lin should be allowed to smack Korra, a teen, who, in my opinion gets smacked around fairly enough in the show. Or how she should be allowed to curbstomp Tenzin, despite us knowing very little about their relationship other than the fact that Lin atatcked his house and misused her power as a police officer to terrorise his new partner. Or how Suyin, a woman who has gone through so much to change and become a better person and still keeps ger heart open for those who hurt her, should die or be killed.

Like yeah, they're jokes, but they speak to how the fandom quickly takes Lin's side in most situations, even when there is more nuance to the situation. I think taht due to tlok having such a large amount of violence and fight scenes ans perhaps due to the personality of Korra herself, the fandom has normalised Lin's aggressive and often physical behaviour. And because most of the characters are teens, Lin's immaturity as a person doesn't stick out too much.

But Lin isn't a teen, like Korra or Mako. She's a 50+ year old woman and a fucking cop at that. She should know better. I think one of my favourite questions Lin's character mames me ask is: "how long can you cling to your trauma before its your responsibility to strive to do better?".

This isn't to say that Lin is a horrible person. I'd actually say she's a pretty good person. It's obvious she cares and she can try to be empathetic when the chips are down. But her lack of emotional maturity makes it difficult for her to actually act on her feelings when not in a life or death situation.

Ultimately this is what I like about Lin as a character, her duality. A very protective and thoghtful person, who has stagnated in a shell of anger and aggression.

And I think Lin's relationship with Korra ilustrates this duality perfectly.

I do enjoy Lin and Korra's arguments due to their chemistry and the excellent voice acting. But like it is still an adult yelling at and holding an actual grudge against a 17 year old. Who is already under a huge amount of stress.

I also think that we often forget that in her tiffs with Lin, Korra often starts off with a suprising amount of calmness and grace. She often attempts to actively connect with Lin and express her point through conversation, despite this being sonething Korra markedly struggles with.

Korra : But there were some thugs threatening a helpless shopkeeper, and I had it ... Lin: [Aggressively.] Can it! You should have called the police and stayed out of the way. Korra: [Slightly pleading tone.] But I couldn't jut sit by and do nothing. It's my duty to help people. See, I'm the Avatar.

[...]

Korra: Wait, Beifong? Lin Beifong? [Excitedly.] You're Toph's daughter! Lin: [Seriously.] What of it? Korra: [A hint of amusement suppressed in her tone.] Well then, why are you treating me like a criminal? Avatar Aang and your mother were friends. They saved the world together.

Through the first season, we're lead to infer that Lin's unfounded animosity towards Korra has something to do with her grudge against Tenzin. I can see this not only due to Tenzin's association witg Korra as her teacher and the son of the previous Avatar, but also due to some similarities between Korra ans Tenzin. They're both people saddled with a major responsibility and legacy, who struggle with forming their own identity due to that legacy. Plus, the comic we got about young Tenzin is essentially 1 to 1 Korra's first day in republic city.

Side note: can we stop demonising Tenzin for leaving Lin? I'm pretty sure it's not confirmed that Tenzin left her purely because he needed to have children. And honestly if after he broke up with Lin, she damaged his home, used her posution to terrorise his new partner, and held a grudge for 11+ years, I'm honestly not to sure what to think about their relationship pre breakup. ESPECIALLY with how willy nilly tlok plays with female on male abuse. No, I'm not saying Lin is an abusor, but there may be other factors we need to consider. I mean Lin does outwardly laugh and sympathise with Korra throwing Mako's desk across the room which is the Makorra abuse moment ™️

Though I also adore the implication in B3 that Lin is also reminded of Suyin by Korra. This also is a comparison that makes sense. Korra and Su were both young, rebellious women who had to leave home to find themselves. Both had tendency to be sarcastic and were opinionated and had a habit of defying authority etc.

And I think this may be even more of a reason why Lin has such an aggresive vendetta against Korra and also why she's so controlling in the later seasons. Particularly when she gets on Korra's ass at the party and says that Korra is "nothing special" feels targeted towards Lin feeling like Suyin got special treatment.

Lin being controlling towards Korra can also be seen as her trying to compensate for when she tried to similarly control Su, but Suyin ended up defying her. (While I see a lot of people bring up parentification between Lin and Su, I'll lean more towards it being a very intense rivalry)

Either way, Korra reminds Lin of people who have hurt her and the hurt she seems to cling to in some parody of comfort in familiarity.

This is one of the most visible patterns in Lin I see. Her absolute abhorrence of changing her mindset. She holds a grudge against Tenzin for over 11 years. She holds a grudge against Su and Toph for longer than that. She is so horrifically resistant to even touching the idsa that Suyin had changed as a person. And even after her and Su make up, the moment the opportunity arrises, Lin is back to typecasting Suyin as the bad guy.

People say that Korra was too harsh in The Metal Clan when she called Lin out.

Korra : Su's right. You're never going to change. You're always gonna be a bitter, lonely woman.

And yeah, it was objectively an incredibly mean thing to say and Korra was quite out of line. But she's not wrong. We see Lin struggle with making human connections, we've deduced that her grip on the past makes her hold grudges against people she's never met. We see her be immature, aggressive and emotionally closed off. If she were a healthy individual outside of Zaofu, I would encourage her distancing herself from Suyin. But clearly whatever coping mechanism Lin has is leaving her pushing people away and treating teenagers like her peers.

Like something clearly needs to change.

And I think that's another reason why Korra and Lin are such a fun duo. Because Korra goes through so mucuhchange herself. She shanges the world, she changes the lives of her friends, she changes herself.

And that's something Lin desperately needs and yet fears all the same. This also makes it even more interesting that Aiwei, a member of the Red Lotus who embody that "change" concept was a vital part of Lin and Suyin begining to reconcile.

And I think Lin knows this, to some extent. She knows her coping mechanisms are flawed, but she doesn't want to acknowledge this. But I need to talk about Lin's babystep trail of an arc in a different post.

I was gonna say that Lin and Korra are also similar but honestly other than their tempers and tendency to terrorise their tallass ex boyfriends, there isn't much there.

I still find Lin and Korra's relationship to have some sweet moments. I loved Lin and Korra's moment of kinship afterthey both lost their bending, how gently Korra grabbed Lin after she passed out in Zaofu, how Lin helped Korra get up the stairs after she was paralysed.

I think that one of the reasons they argue so much in B3 partocularly is because they care for each other quite a bit. They just embody two polar opposites. Korra- change and danger. Lin- stagnation and protection. Of course they'll fight.

----

I don't exactly like how fandom treats Korra and Lin's relationship because it always feels ao watered down. This kinda extends to the entire Krew too. The 'Lin is like the Krew's mom' thing. Because on the jokey surface, yeah, i see it. Female authority figure who makes sure they don't get into trouble. Plus fandom has a tendency to forcefully assign cishet traditional family dynamics to found family.

But on a deeper level, acting as if Lin were a mother to the Krew is in my opinion, a bit of an insult to mothers everywhere. Because Lin acts less like an adult and more like a... slightly older teen? Which makes sense, we see that very little has changed in how Lin approaches young people since she was 22. She treats the Krew like peers, bickering with them and making snide comments, but then pulls the authority figure when she wants something. That's like the worst type of adult.

[This is ironic because my mom is actually very much like Lin and this is probably why I gave her so much of a pass when I watched tlok the first time]

Lin is a big sister/aunt figure to most of the Krew at best. Maybe except Mako but he has his own demons and is making himself a son figure whether Lin likes it or not.

But Korra is basically Lin's stand-in for her sister and they both act like it too. They act like me and my sister tbh. And Asami and Bolin barely interact with Lin anyway. There's more ground to posit Su as Bolin's potential mother figure!

Lin is a fascinating character to me, but fandom tropes have sorta ruined her for me. I came into the fandom really liking her character but ended up sorta jaded to seeing the same questionable takes about her over and over again. It just makes me see how little her potential is explored in the show. The writers failed Lin, not by not allowing her to 'win' against Su and Korra and Tenzin and whoever. They failed her by not giving her the storyline she needed. The storyline for which the main catalyst, Korra already was at the centre of the board. They half assed Lin's storyline and now literally every character who so much as looked at Lin has to pay the price.

[Ooh wow symbolism Lin glaring at Zaofu, Suyin's home, but actually glaring at her own reflection.]

I now realise that I have gone on for way too long and got hotrifically off topic, but I hope I have explained at least a few if my thoughts?

[pigeon-behavior]

What are some things to look for with accounts that post a lot about their pet pigeon? Like what can I look for to be sure the pigeon is being treated properly and not being abused/stressed for views? What are common questionable things you see accounts like those doing?

That is a REALLY good question, thanks for asking!

My take here probably won't be comprehensive, but I will at least try to give you a starting point to go off of.

Here are some red flags in pigeon social media content:

1. They have cross species content. A pigeon should not be interacting with any other species besides people on video. Nor in real life, honestly, but we're talking social media crimes. No other birds- not even ringnecks- and CERTAINLY no mammals. It's dangerous.

2. This can be a little tricky for the less experienced, but watching how someone interacts with their pigeon is key. Do they force interaction? Do they respect their bird? Is this light-hearted teasing that the bird doesn't mind, or are you looking at a freaked out animal? Or a freeze response? If you're not sure, ask around for opinions you trust on behavior. Sometimes it is the only way to make learning leaps.

3. Stupid decision making. You will probably know it when you see it. Bringing a pigeon outside with no harness. Talking about the freedom of birds and how they need to free fly outside. If it Seems like hawk bait, it probably is. (I don't mean that they do this on purpose, they don't. They are are in utter denial about deaths by hawk and their ability to prevent them by simply keeping their birds contained)

4. This one depends, but if you ever see content of a pigeon being held so that the general public can pet it without it being able to get away - usually a bad sign. I saw this connected to a very small rescue once and it was pretty appalling. These are touch adverse animals - you can't do that. And on that note-

5. Any form of advocating for 'struggle-cuddling', or holding the animal still until it stops fighting you, is a HUGE no. It is one of the fastest ways to learned helplessness, and also for some reason rampant advice in this fucking community. I'm bitter about it, obviously.

6. They shit on all breeding. It's not necessarily a sign of neglect but trust me, these are not people you want to be around.

Now, some GOOD things to look out for:

1. Excellent housing. You want to see a wider-than-tall space with a lot of solid perches not caked in 3 inches of gray-green cemented poop. Poop happens. They are birds. It gets dirty. But the cement is neglect. That took time.

2. They interact with their birds respectfully. Even if they might get a little silly with them, you won't see these birds getting squirrely and shying away. Consent does matter here.

3. They have primarily ethical breeds. The range of ethical is pretty wide here. But something like an extreme modena or extreme MOF (modern old frill, NOT the same as the classic old frill) might still show up in a regular loft, and that's okay. They need a home.

4. If they breed, they have some kind of plan. You might not even see it, but occasionally breeders will talk about what they want to do with their breeding project. And their plan shouldn't be fucking stupid. TRLs plan? Stupid. That isn't how breeding Works. So, someone with a brain in their head about this stuff.

5. Someone who is willing to euthanize an animal. Making a creature continue suffering through amputations or other surgeries that are too extreme for it... It isn't ethical. A pigeon can't survive long term with only one leg. We know this. Anyone who is trying to pretend differently is perpetuating suffering.

6. Someone who socializes any baby pigeons properly. That means no hand-raising, no people imprinting. Parent raising. Socialization techniques vary and most are valid.

7. Care more about the bird than the content they make. The bird shouldn't be a toy they force into situations for views.

Generally, just try to pay attention. Don't be afraid to ask someone you trust about what they think of an account. It can be hard to break out of the little echo chambers that start to form, but thinking critically about stuff like that will absolutely help you in the long term. Exposing yourself to better information and cutting off the bad stuff will advance you a lot farther.

A real quick body language lesson for you, on how to tell if a pigeon is comfortable.

A pigeon frozen in place, refusing to move, is not a happy pigeon. Their eyes may get wide and tight, their posture may be slightly tucked in and hunched. It can be easy to mistake them as a little sleepy if you don't know what to look for.

Sleepy don't look like that. Sleepy is loose posture, puffy feathers, squinty eyes, fluffy forehead, raised foot. Some or all of these.

Another sign of discomfort is more active defense. It might look like display dancing, but this bird is telling you to fuck off. They tend to dance and hop around more trying to avoid you, their necks will be stretched out really tall, their heads will dart around, they will interrupt themselves mid-coo to run away.

These are birds who are confident enough to tell you to go away, but still freaked out. I saw a video from a prominent rescue last week of such behavior where someone was "playing" with this poor guy who was totally boxed into his rescue crate with nowhere to go.

Pigeons need an exit route during intense interactions with us. You can't box them into a corner so they have nowhere to go.

A pigeon that WANTS to wrestle or what have you will not flinch away from you like this, or freeze like a rabbit. If you are wrestling and you pull your hand away, the pigeon should run up to your hand again if you offer it from a distance. If you are petting the pigeon, the pigeon should lean their head down, or groan, or nesty grunt, or puff their feathers up, or try to preen you!

This got a little long, but I genuinely hope that was helpful to you. And again, great question.

If you like my posts, please consider tipping me on ko-fi!

[secriden]

i've been thinking and thinking about the significance of the sunflowers parapai sends sky after their first face-to-face meeting post-one night stand and it suddenly hit me why it made such an impact on sky.

prior to this point, sky's attracted to prapai, no question about it. the physical attraction is there pretty much as soon as they lay eyes on each other. even at their one night stand, regardless of the reasons why (tbh my read was that sky wanted it in the moment to feel like he had a way to wrest control over (a) his own body and (b) the situation), sky at least physically seemed to enjoy himself. but its the lack of emotional connection, after the endorphin rush is over, that makes him feel like crap, makes him second-guess his worth and leave feeling used and hallow (and boy oh boy does peat manage to show that so well - he's so so good at wounded).

but then prapai comes back 3 months later, teasing and playful and flirty and still so attractive. sky recognises his own attraction (his self-talky bits are cute but they break my heart), but the one night stand was good enough physically for him to know he doesn't want just that. he doesn't just want to just feel physically good. and he's stuck in the thought that he can never have anything more.

when prapai tells him he's going to pursue him in sky's dorm lobby, he's startled but not shaken. he goes up to his room, essentially tells himself to get out of fantasy land, peeks out the window - but he still fundamentally doesn't engage with the idea that there could be anything real between them.

but the sunflowers and "remember that this wind's watching over the sky". it's protection; its safety.

sky's visibly shaken (peat, oh peat, the vulnerability you managed to convey) and i think this is probably the first time prapai actually manages to get a little bit past the wall sky's already put up between them. and prapai's such a flirty idiot i 100% think he didn't have a clue what he was saying, really. he just thought he was being clever with the unusual flower choice and playing with their names, but in a way that's what makes prapai so perfect for sky.

he's... well, guileless. he's almost accidentally exactly what sky needs to even consider falling in love after everything that happened to him. there's something very clumsy about the charm prapai has and i suspect it's because he's never really had to work to charm anyone before - his looks, money, and status do most of the heavy lifting for him. the fact that he isn't an absolute jerk is pretty much enough for most to be pulled into his orbit. but this works so well for sky because i think someone more suave and actually adapt at wordplay/flirting would have made him run for the hills, because it would have come across as manipulation given his trauma. but prapai is so bad at it (prapai: 'if you don't try it, how do you know?' sky: you absolute fucking idiot did you forget how we met?) that it actually sounds genuine. it makes it safe.

fuck, safety. i feel like it's something everyone wants on some level, but when you've gone through something like that... something where you're betrayed on such a fundamental level by someone you trust, safety becomes the core of what you need. i can deal with hunger, with pain, with loneliness, with being overworked, with being called names or scolded by others - as long as i can maintain that safety. and for sky, that safety always came when he was in his own hands. the only one he could trust with his safety was himself (even as a child, he had no one; alone in Bangkok with a mother who left and a father who cared but was too far away). its why sky isolates; why he'll help his classmates but never ask for help; why he takes the bullying som dishes out without a word.

then prapai comes in and takes care of him when he's sick. his safety is outside of his hands - terrifying. but... also such a relief. i cannot stress how much this was exactly what sky needed. if rain had taken care of him, he would've kicked rain out the second he became conscious. rain doesn't have the backbone/will/character to force the issue. but what prapai did was prioritise sky's safety (health) and for the first time in years, it didn't have to be in his own hands...

(prapai then goes on to makes a lot of other accidentally good choices - comes to Last Cheer and gives him medicine, a place to rest his head, and a quiet space so he can do what he wants (stay to the end, not worry his friends). care, offered at sky's terms. even the bits where prapai's a visibly horny idiot, nearly edging past sky's boundaries but not is counterintuitively perfect because sky sees that prapai's going against what he wants to make sure sky's expressed boundaries are honoured and sees how it costs him something - but, also, i think that speaks more to (a) prapai's growth as a character now that he has a focus that goes beyond the instant gratification of physical release and (b) mame knows her characters and prapai is built to be perfect for sky. honestly most of the skill in writing prapai was the change was gradual enough to be believable in the context of this world. but i digress.)

i just... really adore what prapai did for sky here. like, utter relief that comes from having someone take care of you when you've had to take care of yourself for so long. like a heavy burden suddenly rolling off. and the sunflowers are cheesy but they're the first real hint that this is what's going to make prapai succeed with sky. its not (just) that he's attractive and persistent - that wouldn't have been enough ultimately. (for eg. had phayu pursued sky, he would've also been attractive and persistent but boy would sky have run for the hills with that kind of pursuit. phayu's hot but the manipulation in how he got rain... sometimes i'm baffled by this fandom's take on phayu vs prapai because it's always prapai that everyone calls shady/problematic when he's actually very transparent and honest with his intensions with sky vs the mind games phayu played with rain. i don't have an issue with it because of how rain's character's written - he needed a phayu to get past his internal hang ups - but still, baffling.)

but its how he continually offered to take on the burden of care from sky. so sky could finally actually address the other things he needed. sky didn't have the (physical OR emotional) bandwidth to even consider a relationship until prapai because no one was taking those things off his plate (feeding him, making sure he rests, making sure he took care of himself. like - even when prapai just reminds sky to take care of himself, that's taking some of that mental load off sky having to remember for himself).

honestly this is why when in the scene when sky opens the door to prapai when he's half asleep and then lets prapai feed him, and lets him put him to bed, undress and dress him (all things that would have triggered sky to hell before) - I actually believe it. i believe that sky feels safe around prapai because he's done nothing but actively, persistently offer that to sky over and over again by this point.

anyway, yes, i just really love the sunflower scene for how it gives us that first real glimpse as to why prapai really was perfect for sky.