#what he deserves (consequences) and also what he deserves (peace)
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evilfrogcereal29 · 2 days ago
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Pizza guy!Nikto - Chapter 1
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(ok... This is going to be like, maybe one of the most weirdly specific fanfics you've ever read. For context: I work at a pizza place IRL. Thats it. Thats the only context. I was at work and. Thought about Nikto working there too. That's all you need to know. Enjoy :]!!!
This is going to be a Nikto x GN!customer!reader, but reader is NOT introduced in this chapter.
Cw/tws: mentions of violence- including towards an animal! I think thats all? Enjoy :)!!
NOTE: all text in red & italics are Nikto's voices
Nikto was bored.
Retirement was miserable, and Nikto found himself restless day in, and day out. Unable to find peace while wasting away at home. Sure, he had lot's of retirement money, but he had this urge to work, to kill. He would give anything to be on a plane to another mission right about now, but he was too 'broken'. That's what they basically told him. Too mentally unwell to keep working. A hazard to his own team.
Heh.
What the fuck do they know? They don't know what goes on in his head. So what he broke that recruit's arm? They touched him when he warned them of the consequences. Or who cares that he hit one of his higher-up's service dogs with the buggy? It should've been servicing it's owner, not under the damn vehicle! He's not a danger, the other voices are!
Speaking of voices, they aren't reacting well either, metaphorically biting away at Nikto's psyche each day he did fucking nothing. He felt useless, and they reminded him of that. You idiot, you deserve your suffering for being the way you are. Broken. Broken little solider.
He still gets calls from his mates in the service, especially Krueger, who always makes sure to call as often as possible to keep the man updated on missions, even if they didn't concern him anymore. He suggested that Nikto pick up a part-time job, not for the money, but the work. God (and Krueger) only knows what Nikto's mind gets upto when left to its own devices.
Nikto scoffed at first, he didn't like the idea of working at some measley fast food job, he was above that. He crawled through the fucking trenches and ripped out the throats of women and men, and would be reduced to... What? Cleaning a fucking stove? Heating up processed foods for weak civilians? No. He wouldn't. The voices mocked him, this is what we've been reduced to? Patheic.
And then the rot set in.
Krueger had been very insistant on a visit the second he had time away from work, flying out to see Nikto even as the man ignored his texts and calls. He wasn't dead, Krueger knew that, but he also wasn't in a good place. He couldn't let his companion live like this pathetic slob. Cause that's exactly what he was becoming.
Water and alcohol bottles littered the floor, stacks on stacks of old, half eaten take-out. Junk that should’ve been tossed long ago created walled barriers throughout the house. It was a scene out of horders, and the smell was awful. Christ. Krueger was no clean freak, but this? He'd rather sleep next to corpses than this cesspool of rotting filfth, and in the middle of it all, sat his balaclava-ed, smelly friend on the sofa. Krueger grimmaced, taking careful steps. He nearly stepped on poor Sputnik, who had become content with spending her days lazying about, peeing in places without Nikto's knowledge, and eating off his leftover scraps of food, growing just as lethargic as her owner.
"Nikto... Scheiße..” he would almost be outraged at the man’s carelessness if he didn’t understand how the other functioned, without a job, without a purpose, Nikto was truly a nobody. He lifted the man’s head with a gentleness, an action only someone like Krueger could get away with, looking into those glazed-over icy blues.
“This is… this is bad Nikto..” he mutters, eyes filled with..love? Concern? Something Nikto wasn’t used to often. Nikto finally shows evidence of life as his eyes flicker up in wordless understanding. Krueger continues,
"I can't stand to see you like this. You can't stand being like this. I'm going to help you."
Krueger lifts his friend up, albiet with mild arguing and growling from the disguntled bear of a man that Nikto is. He sets Nikto's cheap laptop on his lap and types in job sites, which already has Nikto tense.
"Krueger- чёрт побери! you're acting like my fucking mother-"
"good, about time someone comes in and wipes your ass, if not yourself." Krueger grumbles, scrolling through the job offers, "what's your SNILS...?"
After a painstaking back and forth, and Krueger prying for all of Nikto's personal info, he sent in a few applications on his friend's behalf. Patting the other on the back as Nikto's thumbs rubbed at his temples, fighting back the urge to pulverize his only real friend. You really should, he's a nuisance...
"this is... Not ideal.." Nikto finally grumbles, finishing the last of some lukewarm whisky from the bottle.
"none of this is, meine freund, but this...Is worse." Noone has ever seen them like this, so...domestic. In reality, this was as hard for Krueger as it was for Nikto, The Alligence wasn't the same without the Russian, fighting wasn't the same. Krueger rested a hand on his shoulder.
"everything is going to change, can you try to change a little with it?"
Change? Krueger wanted him to change? Was that even possible? He'd been so set in his ways ever since the incident. But the look in Krueger eyes let Nikto know that there wasn't really a choice.
What are you kidding? You could change as far as you could throw a boulder! Never!
He sighed, deeply. His shoulders slumping miserably as he exhaled.
"fine. But If we don't like the job-"
"ja, ja, you don't have to stay. I get it. I can't make you." He interupted, waving his hand dismissively, "but don't just give up right away. Can you promise me that?"
Nikto hated making promises, he hated feeling like he owed anyone anything, he didn't take on debts or deals. Go ahead, make more promises you can't keep. We know the truth.
Yet here he was, being interviewed by an elderly couple, who pitied him for his past as a solider.
"me and Martha are going to see how you fair in the kitchen, and if that's turns out to be too overwhelming we can move you to a more simple job like delivery. Just bring the customers their pizzas." The eldery man said with an acknowledging smile.
He nodded to the man, Michael, reaching across the table to shake his hand, thanking him begrudgingly for this... 'Opportunity'. Thats damn well what it was, but Nikto didn't quite see it that way yet. As he left with a work shirt displaying the place's name and logo, he felt his heart drop. And a shrill, annoying voice invading his mind.
You are truely a fucking Развалюха. Good luck ever trying to live a normal life!
And now Nikto was worried.
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Hai :3 I hope you enjoyed this first chapter, I wanted to introduce reader in this first part but it was getting long and I also just wanted to get something out. There will be more chapters for this, but they might be kind of slow to come out😭 work takes up a LOT of my time tbh, but also working inspires me cause...yk pizza place setting so- its a double edged sword. But if you enjoyed pls like and reblog it means sm♥️♥️ ty for reading!!
And to the person who sent me an ask in my inbox about the relationship dynamics between NiktoKrueger + criminal!reader, I see u and ur creative vision, I started writing something today in response ;) just gimme some time!!!
Also an @ list for some mooties who I think would like to see this :3
@simp4konig @lizzy019 @fishsinsareacknowledged @zoloftwithdrawalnausea sorry If I missed anyone, lmk if you'd like to be tagged (or not tagged) in future chapters!!
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the-witch-of-woods-beyond · 6 months ago
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my favourite headcanon for glass sorenson is that she came down with farm station and watched them murder luke right in front of her eyes (or kidnap him or something cause i love tragic lovers but she deserves to be happy) and so she’s one of the first people to join pike’s militia and turn vengeful, and her best friend wells (he lives too cause this is my canon now) is trying to get through to her but she won’t hear it cause all she wants is justice and to get her oldest friend clarke griffin out of polis and away from harm (they’re friends too fight me on this i dare you)
(also sorry about the tags i didn’t know i had that rant in me 😭😭)
#the 100#the 100 novels#kass morgan#glass sorenson#please explain to me why she wasn’t in the show#actually dont i dont want excuses 😭😭#shes my babyyyyy#and this is my favourite headcanon for her#i think that after everything that happened to her she deserved to stab someone#i also think having someone explicitly in the younger main cast who was affected by the farm station massacre would help highlight why they#refused to trust grounders and wanted vengeance for what happened to them#because it feels like the show was going for a whole black and white youre wrong thing#which sucked#cause you literally hear hannah and pike say that the CHILDREN who were just PLAYING IN THE SNOW were the first to die#and then the writers are like but how DARE they want retribution#also im sorry but lexa was so stupid to think the ice queens body would be enough#everyone was so for jus drein jus daun but when they demanded the grounders responsible it was literally never adressed#and they didn’t even see the ice queen die#lexa just wanted to hand them her body and be like okay its done now stop causing problems#also she did literal shit to help because a whole ass SEASON later some of farm station are still alive being held as SLAVES by the ones#who attacked them#and if the main group didnt go after the ship for ita resources they would have died their in praimfaya or died through the labour#like please explain to me why the writers just brushed this aside and then made BELAMY the guy who lost someone he loved and was manipulate#the villain of that season like the fuck????????#not saying they had a right to go around massacring villages im not an idiot that was too far but the people who are like oh they were#murdering children how could they 😔😔#like the grounders didnt kill children FIRST and get NO FUCKING CONSEQUENCES pisses me off to no end#also im really supposed to see skaikru as villains fot wanting vengeance when literally 99.99% of the grounders we meet wanted it and the#ones who didnt DIED for chosing peace because the rest refused to abadon violence like titus and lincoln literally say lexa would DIE for#wanting peace and changing her ways cause her people would MURDER her and yet skaikru were evil for wanting justice
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lbhslefttiddie · 2 years ago
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I READ PLASTROMANCY AND IM HAUNTED AND BEWITCHED !!!!!! FUCK
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nuadaargetlamh · 4 months ago
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One is a convicted criminal that wants to:
Institute a dictatorship “on day one only” (with majority support from his party!)
Give a greenlight to Project 2025
Use a weakened Schedule F to install THOUSANDS of cronies
Institute military tribunals for his political enemies (and allies!)
Gun down “enemies from within”
Support Russia in wiping Ukraine off the map
Use the combo of the removal of the Chevron deference/the Supreme Court allowing people to openly bribe them/Schedule F to extend the far-right’s reach into every government agency and deregulate everything to the benefit of his rich capitalist buddies
Has gotten total immunity for “official acts” (what counts as “official”? Whatever his Schedule F appointed judges choose of course.)
Already took away so many freedoms from racial minorities/queer people/women/anyone-that-isn’t-a-rich-white-man that it would take ages to list them all in this post
and so so so so SO MUCH MORE.
The other is a typical neoliberal politician.
Remember also, you’re not just choosing a president, you’re choosing their cabinet, potential Supreme Court justices, federal employees as well. With the above listed ALONE, Trump would do so much more damage than just what he can do himself. That’s not including everything else his Federalist Society Supreme Court would and have given him on a silver platter. Supreme Court Justices are for LIFE, and we’ve already seen the potentially irreparable damage this far-right activist court has done to the fabric of democracy.
Project 2025 really deserves a part to itself just to list some of what it includes: complete abortion/contraceptive ban (no exceptions), destroying worker’s unions and protections, remove Social Security/Medicare/Affordable Care Act, end civil rights protections in government, ban teaching the history of slavery, remove climate protections while gutting the EPA, end equal marriage and enforce the “traditional family ideal”, use the military to gun down protests, mass deportation of legal immigrants (especially Muslims), ending birthright citizenship, pack the lower courts, and plenty more. The far-right wasn’t able to take full advantage of Trump’s presidency the first time since it was so unexpected. They’re preparing so that they won’t make the same mistake again. THERE ARE OVER 900 PAGES OF POLICIES AND PLANS THAT THEY ABSOLUTELY WILL IMPLEMENT IF THEY WIN. READ IT. Anyone that says they won’t is either a liar or already drank the Kool-Aid. Isn’t it interesting that every politician that supports it, including his vice president, wants Trump to win?
Not to mention, if you care about Palestine (like I do, a lot), Trump would be MUCH WORSE for Palestine than the other candidate, supporting Bibi going “from the river to the sea” and already cut off millions in aid to Palestine in 2018 (which Dems reversed!). If you support a free Palestine and don’t vote blue, you have categorically hurt them more than if you did. Even Palestinians themselves want the Democrat candidate over Trump. There is no quick and bloodless peace deal that both Palestine and Israel would ever agree to. The road to an end of the Palestine-Israel conflict is going to be long and difficult, probably decades of dedicated de-radicalization in both states, and will involve far more than one person’s decisions in the end. Unless Trump takes power, and avoids all that by sending enough bombs to turn the Gaza Strip into dust.
There are a few reasons you would choose to vote third party in a FPTP system (support ranked choice voting btw) or not vote “in protest” while ignoring all the state and local elections that affect your area more than the president. Either you’re privileged enough to not be affected by what Trump would bring, you’re ignorant of the consequences, or you care more about doing nothing perfectly rather than doing something, anything that isn’t 100% ideologically “pure” to fight against the far-right fascist movement.
Am I a democratic socialist? Yes. Am I a realist? Also yes. In every single down-ballot race, and through my activism, I will fight for the rights of the oppressed and working-class. But the Presidency isn’t fucking winnable right now, and probably won’t be for decades. Pro-corporatist/anti-worker sentiment is baked into the fucking bones of this country and its people. A majority of eligible voters wouldn’t vote for Bernie, and he’s barely center-left. Voting for anything other than one of the two big parties is a useless feel-good gesture at the moment. Or you’re a dumbass accelerationist, and if you are, honestly go fuck yourself.
Let’s say you want a socialist revolution, full-tilt government takeover. I want that too, in my wildest dreams! We’re on the same page there. So how are you going to do it. How? HOW? What pro-worker activist groups are you working with? Are you encouraging your workplace to form a union? Volunteering for/donating to your local farmers’ co-op? Canvassing for pro-worker legislation? Hell, even something as small as distributing free copies of high-school/college textbooks, so that those of poorer means have a better chance at affording advanced education? Are you doing anything to help? Any praxis at all, rather than typing wishful thoughts of revolution alongside insults to people who aren’t as “correct” as you on the internet?
Every voter that still supports Trump is energized by every cruelty he enacts, while millions of Democrats and third-partyists care more about purity tests and manifesting socialist revolution tulpas than avoiding a fascist dictatorship.
Have a brain, touch grass, and vote blue all the way down that fucking ballot.
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sugarlywhispers · 3 months ago
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viking!b.katsuki x fem!reader
a.n; i wanted to give viking!bakugou a try, and honestly, this is all @imaginationmess fault for feeding me fanarts of bakugou and his dragon🙃 luv you tho🤍
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Viking Bakugou Katsuki who rides the biggest and most terrifying dragon that has ever existed.
A legend said that his dragon in particular had been going on for generations in his family, no one willing to risk their life to tame it. Until Katsuki’s uncle, Bakugou Kudo, did it. He had been the first in generations to ride this dragon. Yet he understood that the bond between dragon and riders was not consolidated between them.
When Katsuki was eight, the little shit escaped the hut and went towards where the nests were. Kudo almost had a heart attack when he saw the brat far off and almost there. He sprinted as fast as he could, a tragedy already displaying in his head –the kid being incinerated, turned to ashes, and his sister cutting his dick off for being a sorry ass uncle. Fuck, and he would had deserved it. Because even though he had tamed the beast, it was still very unstable to let anyone close to it; one of his own men had suffered the consequences of trying to get close, more than half his body had been burned. He was no longer part of their battles.
However, Kudo saw in first person how a dragon’s bond was created. Between his terrifying dragon and his little nephew.
It hadn’t looked much from his perspective, yet he felt the magical aura surrounding them. Katsuki laughed as he touched the dragon’s snot like it was a mer pup, happy and excited while climbing its leg with such ease until he was up on its back, right behind the head. The dragon himself helped the kid to reach the place. Kudo noticed then the beast’s eyes shining a very resplendent gold. Yep, that was definitely a bond.The kid was anything but scared, as he caressed the dragon's head, hugging it even.
Kudo smiled, shaking his head, hands over his hips as he took a deep breath, relaxing. The dragon was only letting him ride it because it knew that Katsuki was his bonded rider and Kudo was related by blood to the kid.
As years went by, the bond only became stronger and deeper. Kudo would ride it in battles, but once at home, the brat and the beast were like one. When Katsuki turned eighteen, Kudo retired from battles and settled down with a wife and kids at the village located next to that of where their family originally came from. From that day on, the brat became the dragon’s one and only owner.
Katsuki was the only human being able to control, care for and command this massive dragon, also becoming the nightmare of most villages in the world. Both, dragon and rider were vicious, deadly and feared.
You still remember the day Bakugou Katsuki landed on your lands. The bright blue sky suddenly turned dark, the huge dragon he rode clouding the sun above. Everyone knew what it meant. Destruction and chaos, the end of their peaceful lives.
The Leader of the village, your dad, didn’t waste time in trying to negotiate a truce between them.
And that truce is you.
You are forced to marry him, to leave your family, friends and life there and go with this barbaric man. You are a bit afraid he is some sort of savage. Rumors told how violent he was, how scary he looked with his scars and aggressive attitude towards everyone. Now that you have said man in front of you, you agreed with all of them.
You were expecting him to manhandle you, to treat you like another woman he picked to use for his own pleasure. Yet all you received since you stepped foot in his village, in his home, had been nothing but coldness and distance. He has kept to himself, doing his stuff and trying not to get in your way. Least to say, it has been completely awkward since the ceremony.
When you are getting ready for it, his mom enters his-your hut. She smiles, a sincere feeling in her eyes, “Being the daughter of a Leader sucks, ain’t it?”
You look down, a slight smile on your face that agrees with her but eyes filled with tears you’re holding back. “It does.”
You feel her hand on your shoulder, and the little squish she gives it in reassurance makes the knot in your throat tighter.
“My son is not a charming prince; however, I know the kind of man I raised him to be. You’re gonna be okay.”
You don’t say anything in response. You don’t even look back at her, but you think she didn’t expect it either as she walks out, leaving you alone. As you walk towards the entrance, fully knowing that once you cross it, your soon to be husband will be waiting at the end of the aisle, all you can wish is that Ms. Bakugou is right.
When the ceremony reaches its end, the old lady of his village drawing the symbols of union, love and family in your foreheads, Bakugou extends his hands for you to lay yours over his. You still haven’t looked him in the eyes, but you do what's expected for the ceremony. When your hands touch the skin of his, you can't avoid thinking how warm they feel. Big calloused, rough and strong hands surround yours, and you don't hate the feeling. On the contrary, it’s quite comforting. The old lady ties a beautifully white and gold silk ribbon around your hands, symbolizing the union of the souls.
While everyone cheers, you finally decide to raise your eyes towards him. Deep red eyes collide with yours, making a shudder run your body at their intensity. Surprisingly, it isn’t a bad feeling, but it is something you have never felt before.
A tingly feeling swirls in your stomach as you realize Bakugou Katsuki's face is getting closer and closer to yours, his intent clear. He is going to kiss you. Your first kiss. You close your eyes instinctively and his lips touch yours in a quick and short peck. Yet it feels like all the tingles in your stomach exploded, sending warmth throughout your whole body.
That has been the only close and physical interaction you have had until today.
Bakugou Katsuki decides to give you space to accommodate and get to know his village and people around.
It doesn't mean he doesn't want you. However, he never makes any sort of move towards you.
Until one day…
Bakugou got back that morning to the village after being away for almost four days with the victory of conquering another village, so you decide to bring him some of the sweet bread you have cooked as a welcome back. You have to admit, this time with him since the marriage ceremony hasn’t been bad. Civil, even. Despite his distance and cold attitude, he has never disrespected or forced you to nothing. Not even that first night as husband and wife. He didn’t even try, he simply picked one of the pillows and clothes to make a bed on the floor, closer to the entrance door, and slept there. You have been very confused. Your mum had previously told you everything of what was expected from a woman on the night of the ceremony. You expected even a fight between you two, because of course you didn’t want that to happen with a complete stranger like he was still to you.
Nevertheless, he never hovers over you. But you do feel his eyes on you whenever he’s around. He always makes some sort of sound for you to acknowledge that his presence is close. Katsuki is attentive to your reactions whenever you are both alone and doesn't even raise his voice at you. Ever.
Then again, he is his ruthless self with everyone else.
You tried looking for him around the village, but couldn't find Bakugou anywhere. So you walk towards the woods where you know the dragon's nests are, where they rest. Even though Bakugou has explicitly forbidden you to go near there, due to the danger their dragons were most of the time, even for the riders.
You are confident Katsuki will be there, so probably he will see you from a distance and you wont need to get that close. But when you arrive, you come face to face with the massive beast: Bakugou's dragon, Cweorth.
You have seen it at a distance, but having the beast up close is a completely different experience. Its whole body is red, with golden piercing eyes that feel very much like Bakugou’s itself. Its wings are huge as they spread in a stretching movement up high, almost taller than the big trees that surround the woods. You can even see some flare of gold in its scale that actually looks mesmerizing. Majestic.
Your basket falls to the floor in shock when the beast finally looks down at your small, minuscule being. It watches you intently, with a scowl on its face –like beast, like owner. But far away from feeling scared by it, you feel intrigued. You feel enamored even as you stand there, looking at such majestic creature.
Bakugou is actually several meters away, taking a bath in the lake close to the nests, cleaning all the blood and dirt off his body before going to the hut he shares with you. He has some scratches and cuts from the fights, but nothing deep or worrisome. He is very proud in saying he is the fucking best out there.
When he's walking through the woods back to the nests of their dragons, he sees it.
His whole body freezes. You are standing there, your arm and hand stretched upwards. His own dragon, the one who eats men like candy at Katsuki's own command, the one who has burned villages in seconds with his strong fire, the one who hates anyone’s touch or closeness that isn't Bakugou himself... His dragon has his snot close to you, letting you pet him with its eyes closed, enjoying your affection like a small puppy dog.
And he can not fucking believe what his eyes are seeing.
Of all the women he has had before you, none were brave enough to even look at the beast. They had all been afraid to death.
And there you stand, looking even fascinated by it. Eyes shining and smiling as you feel for the first time what its skin is like under your touch. You look… beautiful. Gorgeous. Heavenly sent. Fuck. You have him in your hands already.
Bakugou Katsuki then decides:
He will fucking kiss the ground you walk. He will give you everything you ask of him.
You want certain clothes to wear? He will search for them for you. You want certain foods? He will fly his dragon to wherever they are made or grown on. You want a land? He will fucking burn every single thing or life it takes to give it to you.
You want him? He will gladly give himself completely to you.
Well, he already is.
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fangirlanxiety74 · 5 months ago
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Did this to a previous post about Ted now doing it to another (I'm the Tedxpert here guys it's just what I need to do /j)
Uhh also spoiling under cut cause it mentions heavier topics
Ted was groomed. Sorry, let's get this out of the way here, let's finally talk about what I haven't seen anyone else say yet, he was groomed. While I hc him as younger when it happened (17), I believe the canon age is 19.
"Wdym Sara he's 19 he's an adult he can do wha-"
HE WAS GROOMED. HE WAS A COLLEGE FRESHMAN AT OLDEST. WITH A, WHAT, 40/50 SOMETHING YEAR OLD WOMAN?
He was groomed.
And I don't think we. Acknowledge this enough as a fandom. I think there's a lot about the characters we don't acknowledge as a fandom, but I don't want to harp on anyone's fun, so this is not me going "Oh I hate this fandom blah blah blah I'm the fun police take literature seriously!!!" Nah. Y'all are hilarious, keep being yourselves. I'm just talking to get words out into the world.
But Ted was groomed. He was, a young adult at best, with a middle-aged woman. And, from how I understand the guide and the game, this woman promised him freedom. Promised him love, promised him success and comfort and stability, promised that he could finally get away from the shitty life he was in if he just ran away with her; she promised him the whole world and he, young and having no other adult in his life who ever treated him like that, believed her.
And maybe she did it intentionally. Maybe she didn't. I don't think it matters, because either way, that sort of promise and love did nothing but traumatize him. And all that trauma, for what? For her to just... die. Just like that. No warning.
And maybe he cared about her, maybe he didn't. I can't imagine that he didn't, but say he didn't. That's still... a lot. On someone. And he probably grieved in the worst way possible, self-imploding until he realized he was fucked if he didn't find a way to start making money.
And well, if there was one thing she would've liked about him, it was his willingness to please her. Why else would she have dragged this kid young adult along for no reason?
So he does it to other women, much like her; women who treat him like she did. And you're right, he doesn't like it. Hates it, actually, but it gets him what he wants. Momentary attention and affection, a way to keep himself alive, and in turn the women get him. His body.
How could you walk away from that, unscathed?
And the thing is, he didn't. He was still doing it up until AM imploded the world. No wonder he hates women, I wouldn't be surprised if he has a fear of them the same way women who have been treated like that their whole lives fear men.
And now, at the end of the world, there's Ellen. Sweet, kind, perfect Ellen who never did anything to hurt him, but she's a womanTM and she's being nice to him, and he's learned that being nice means wanting something out of him, so he responds the way he usually does. And when he doesn't think that, he goes on the opposite end of thinking she's "one of the good ones," convincing himself he's in love with her, etc, when really he's just... not used to someone being nice... because they're nice. Because he's someone who deserves niceness.
It's traumatizing. It's heartbreaking and tragic and like... Yeah, you just really summed it up. It's all just transactional to him. Not just "I'll give you myself if you give me money/if you give me attention/if you give me whatever"
"I'll give you myself you give me kindness."
Or literally anything, for that matter.
And like. I don't know. I think the jokes and the hatred for him about how he used rich women for money, how he's a conman and playboy, the way he treated Ellen, etc. It's all understandable but like.
I kinda wish we took a second to look into where it stemmed from.
Putting this under a read more because it deals with heavier topics I’m not really sure how to tag !
Oh also Ted thought. In the game if you make him have sex with one of the maids, afterward, he says “did I live up to your expectations?” This could be more of a playful thing, but… I don’t know. Something about that unsettles me. He was used by older women, remember, and now he sees sex as almost a bartering tool. You give me this, and I’ll give you myself. It’s a dubiously consensual trade of sorts, done simply because he feels he needs to rather than any sort of real desire to at all. And, I think this could also contribute to his unsavory view on women. He could feel a lot of shame around having been used like that because how could he have Not liked it? He’s a Man and that’s what Men Want. So with no one and nothing to turn to, he lashes out.
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raidark · 3 months ago
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One thing I find funny from Show Dany haters is how much they call her an egomaniac tyrant who just wanted to control everything and everyone to obey her, that she only cared about the throne and power. How much they laugh at the idea of her trying to help common people, break the system and in general, give power to powerless people, etc. That she would only want power for herself and would loathe democracy more than any other character.
These people are also the ones who laughed along Season 8 Sansa, Tyrion, Arya and others when Sam proposed democracy as a system for Westeros at the end of the show.
To all that people, I'd like to kindly remind that before leaving for Westeros, Daenerys established democracy in Meereen (and the rest of the Bay of Dragons, I suppose). She and Tyrion spent some undetermined time to plan it and then left Daario and the Second Sons to keep the peace while people chose their rulers and a new government was appointed.
Now, while I'm sure we all would have liked to know the aftermatch of that, how things worked there after her leaving and especially after her death, we won't ever know thanks to certain writers who kinda forgot about it after S6, only remembering the Bay when deciding that slaying slavers was apparently a sign of madness and evilness ?¿
If you ask me, with Dany dead, most of her army destroyed as well, and no one else strong enough to protect the Bay, slavery will return and way worse. But that wasn't something D&D wanted people to think about because that would add some grey to the situation and they wanted Dany to be irremediably unjustifiable in her acts and her death the only option with only good consequences. Just to be clear, I think S8 Dany, a total different character from previous seasons, deserved to die after what she did. But go and visit the Bay in ten years, Jon and Tyrion, and ask them if what you two did was good. Surely and certaintly there were consequences.
In any case, since we'll never know what would happen, the series ends with Daenerys being the only ruler who actually cared for her people enough that she actually gave them total power to choose who should rule them... just 12 episodes before the writers decided she should mass murder innocents for literally no reason at all
She remains the only one who established real democracy that considered people no matter their origins or status (and not merely in a organization like the Night Watch) while the high nobles of Westeros laughed and considered the idea ridiculous. What a tyrant, right?
I'd have liked Sam to know the one who actually established his idea in a different place was the queen he hated so much, while all the others laughed. I'd have also liked if he was told what his family did and how many people died because of their betrayal, how many chances were even then offered to them, rather than just "they didn't bend the knee so i killed them lol". But the goal in Season 8 was always to paint Dany as a villain with no gray in the middle, just like they made Jon lie to his family and the lords and say Dany forced him to bend the knee in order to help the North when she actually swore to defend it without any commitment to her cause the moment she realized the threat was real and no fantasy. Yet no one, not even Dany, ever blinked an eye about this. Like it was retconned to frame her as evil.
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insecure-snek · 9 months ago
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I feel like this is probably an unpopular opinion (that’s why I’m posting here and not on twitter) but I just wanna know if anyone else feels this way.
Obviously, I think Wilbur is the one Shelby is talking about, and as someone who was also abused, I feel stronger hearing her story. I hope she’s able to find peace soon.
Maybe I’m just an overly optimistic person, but I think Wilbur needs help. A lot of it. And I think, probably not a popular idea, that even though he’s a piece of shit in this situation, that he deserves it.
I’m an overly trusting person by nature. Obviously I wasn’t there when any of this happened. I am just a stranger on the internet. I don’t know what went on, I didn’t see anything happen. However, I think I want Wilbur to get better and I think he can.
He needs to be deplatformed. At least until he has PUBLICLY apologized to Shelby, and is showing to his friends (not us, the audience, not only Shelby, EVERYONE HE KNOWS PERSONALLY) that he is making an effort to never treat another person like that again. But I think, and please don’t come with your pitchforks for me, the person Wilbur abuses the most is himself.
He clearly has other problems that are not making him a good person. Mental health is not a excuse for poor behavior. However, it is an explanation. Your mental health issues and trauma are not your fault, however, managing both those things are unfortunately YOUR responsibility. They are HIS Responsibility to fix and manage, not Shelby’s, not Phil’s, not James, NO ONE BUT HIM.
Call me stupid, or crazy, or whatever, but I firmly believe in the idea of (almost) every human being capable of change. I have siblings who used to treat me terribly, who are much older than me, and I was hurt by them. But as I grew, I saw them realize just how terrible they treated me. They changed their behavior, and apologized to me many many times. They showed me people can wake up and change their lives around. And, whether or not Wilbur comes back to content creation, I hope he gets the help he so clearly needs.
Shelby owes him nothing. His fan base owes him nothing. His friends owe him nothing. Wilbur owes them everything. Shelby deserves to hold back her forgiveness when it so clearly isn’t deserved. She should never forgive him if she doesn’t want to. That’s her right.
Maybe I believe in people too much. But I truly hope he changes. Not only for his friends, family, and loved ones, but for his own sake. He’s going to end up dead if he continues this way, and I believe no one deserves to die. (I’m not even for the death penalty. Let them sit and suffer forever).
Anyway, get some rest all, drink some water, and remember that the world becoming a better place starts with you. Treat people the way you wanna be treated. 💕
Update: Wilbur’s response was absolutely awful, no surprise there. As someone else who responded said, abusers often don’t think of themselves as such. I still hope he gets help. Props to ranboo and all the others standing up to him. I hope this wakes him the fuck up. Until further notice, please stop supporting him. Unfollow him, un add his music, whatever you can to get him to deeply regret this shit he’s done. Those were his actions. These are the consequences.
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wintervalewritersecond · 2 years ago
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siren song || - xavier thorpe
requested: yes! requests: open! second part of siren song! the third part is also out, check my masterlist! ^^
A/N: thank you for the love on siren song! to read part one, click here! i hope you enjoy this part <3 i had to rewrite this considering i accidentally deleted it :')
wordcount: 4.736 warnings: xavier being a bad friend, curse words, slight memory loss, incorrect information about siren song probably, use of weed.
After finally convincing Bianca to use her Siren Song, you get some well-deserved peace in your head. How long does it take for Xavier to notice the changes?
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"What?"
The question catches Bianca off guard, not something that happens a lot. Tears are staining your face as you sniff, trying to not start sobbing again.
"Hey, it's okay. Come in."
Her arm is placed on your shoulders as she guides you into her room, placing you on her bed before grabbing her desk chair, sitting next to you.
"What has gotten you so upset?"
You look down at your hands, biting your cheeks as you nervously fiddle with your fingers. You feel embarrassed to sit here, crying in the dorm of your friend that used to be Xaviers girlfriend, but you didn't know anyone that would know how you feel. No one except for Bianca.
"I think Xavier hates me."
"What?" Bianca exclaims shocked. "Why do you think that?"
If there is one thing that Bianca was sure of, it was that Xavier is completely infatuated with you. Even during their relationship, he still made sure to spend some time with you, and Bianca never cared. She trusted both of you, as you became her friend when the relationship was going on. When the couple broke up, your friendship watered down a bit, but you were still both friendly.
"We just had a fight," you whisper. "He never yelled at me like that. Never."
She hands you a tissue, breathing in deeply.
"He has been ignoring me for weeks. He became so obsessed with Wednesday that he did not have any time for me. She- she asked him to the Rave'n and then he found out that she just used him," you ramble. "I asked him to come with me, not even as a real date, but just so he wouldn't be alone. And then he totally ditched me there the second Wednesday came in. The worst thing is, she doesn't even like him. She told me."
How stupid can a boy be? Bianca grits her teeth, shaking her head.
"He is dumb. If there is one thing that he should do, it's to get his head straight. I can't believe that he would do this. Especially after all you have done for him!"
"What if I just become more like Wednesday? I- I can braid my hair? I will even learn to play the cello. He- He said that she was better than me... That I just bother him. Am I too obsessed or- or annoying?"
Even Bianca's heart breaks at that point. The tears are rolling down your face again as you still don't dare to look up at her.
"Am I really that bad of a friend?"
"No!" Bianca immediately responds. "No, Y/N, if anything, you are a great friend. Too good for him. You don't need to be Wednesday to be better. I think she is too emotionless for her own good."
"I wish I was that way," you sigh. "Please, Bianca. If I tell you that I really want it, can you really not use your Song?"
Bianca takes a deep breath, her leg bouncing up and down. Her eyes fall down to the amulet around her neck. It is very against the rules to use her Siren Song, it is something that could get her in a lot of trouble. But, at the same time, she knows exactly how you feel. Xavier is just someone who deserves love, yet he doesn't know how to act around it when someone is literally handing it to him on a silver plate.
Her heart tells her to help you, to give you everything you deserve, but she knows that she also needs to think about the possible consequences. Though your grades have been slipping and your mood has been down for a while now as well. So many factors.
"Y/N, I really don't know."
"What if I consent to it? Surely that must be fine. I- I will sign a contract, even. Write it myself. I- Even only thinking about doing this for me would already be enough."
You must genuinely sound so annoying now, but you know that this will help.
"Why won't you try talking to Kinbott first?"
"I just need something... Something that will work immediately. A Siren Song can always be undone, right?"
"I'm not sure about that," Bianca grimaces. "It's hard, Y/N. I promise you that I will think about it. Just... Try and get some rest, okay?"
-
You had spent the rest of the weekend laying in bed, napping or reading, and sometimes you would head to the Quad to get something to eat. Kent made sure to try and cheer you up, which did work to an extent. You appreciate having a friend like that.
Even from the distance you sit at now, you can still see the figure of Wednesday Addams, sitting alone at her table while writing something down in her notebook. Ajax waves Xavier over to get him to sit at your table but is quickly rejected as the long-haired boy decides to sit with Wednesday. She looks up with the deadliest of looks, though it doesn't seem to phase him at all. Can't he see?
Bianca looks out from the second level of the Quad, spotting both you and Xavier. Not one word is exchanged, though your body language speaks for itself. Your shoulders are slumped and even though Kent tries his hardest to make you laugh, it isn't enough.
Seeing you so upset about someone who doesn't deserve it makes her feel bad. Even in her relationship, she felt like you were more important to Xavier, and that is something she just... Accepted. She never blamed you for it, as Bianca could never really trust Xavier either. But the feelings he has for you are totally real.
After that dinner, you retired back to your room. Yoko would be hanging out with Divina anyway. Just as you let yourself fall on your bed, you hear a knock on the door.
"Coming!"
You kick your bag underneath your bed before walking up to the door, opening it to reveal a Bianca behind it.
"I will only do it after you agree to all the consequences."
She walks in as you close the door behind her, trailing after her.
"You're serious?"
"You deserve to have some peace, Y/N. God knows I wish someone could have done this for me when I was in your situation. I will tell you every consequence," Bianca looks at you sternly. "And I have some conditions."
"Yeah- Yeah totally."
Bianca sits down at your desk, handing you a pen and paper.
"You are to write down that you agree with the Siren Song. I can't just use it whenever I want. Principal Weems will have my head if she finds out."
"Anything, Bianca."
You start writing, still listening to the siren as she explains everything.
"I can genuinely not say if I am able to undo the Song. There is a high likelihood that it will not return to you and Xavier being best friends. I also do not know what to do if this news ever reaches Weems. No one knows that we are planning to do this, no one except for us."
"I promise you, I will take all the blame," you nod, a weak smile on your face. "It is the least I can do."
"Are you sure you want to do this?" She looks at you, her eyebrows stuck in a frown. "It's not something small. You deserve much better than how Xavier acts now."
"I- Yeah. I thought about it all day yesterday. I just... I want to. I promise."
You hand her the paper in neatly written handwriting.
I, Y/N Y/L/N, fully consent to the use of the Siren Song by Bianca Barcley. I have willingly agreed to be under the influence of the song for as long as I wish. All punishments that are given for using the Siren Song are punishments I will take over. Bianca Barcley is not to be lectured nor punished for her actions.
Underneath it is your handwriting, together with the date of today. Bianca takes a deep breath, nodding as she reads it over and over again.
"What exactly... Is it that you want me to do? You just... Want to forget him?"
You nod.
"I was thinking that... I don't want to be scared of him, I just want to stay out of his way. If that makes any sense?"
"Xavier Thorpe will be the one you forget, from now on his name will stop sounding in your head," Bianca mutters, trying to practice whatever she will say. "Distance is something that you will keep, he will not be the reason as to why you... Weep?"
You will forget Xavier, make sure to keep your distance, and not cry over him. You do feel guilty for making Bianca use the Siren Song on you, but in your eyes, it feels like the only way out.
"I think you will just return to how it was before you met Xavier," she then nods. "I will try to make sure that you will not get too close to him again, but I can't promise anything. If you have feelings for him now, you might just... Start liking him all over again."
"I just need to forget," you say, handing the handwritten note to Bianca. "Thank you so much, Bianca."
"This might be the first time I feel guilty for using it," she laughs nervously. "But, you deserve it. Truly. Xavier just needs to get his act straight. He loves you, he's just dumb."
You don't fully believe her. You want to, but you can't. You truly thought that he liked you back, that he was also interested in you. But now you were not even sure if he liked you as a friend anymore.
"Ready? You will probably be sleepy after this."
Trembling hands and nervous sighs.
"As ready as I'll ever be."
Bianca nods, pulling the necklace off of her neck. She closes her eyes, holding your hands in hers.
"Xavier Thorpe will be the one you forget, from now on his name will stop sounding in your head. Distance is something that you will keep, he will not be the reason as to why you weep."
-
You had woken up with a slight headache. Your limbs are still sore from the Rave'n dance, but that can't stop you. Not that you remember a lot of it; they must have spiked the drinks. You pick up your bag from under the bed, emptying it out before filling it with everything you need for the day. After finally finding all your books, pens, and notebooks, you exit your room.
"Hi, guys!"
With a big smile, you greet your friends, plopping down in between Kent and Bianca. You had gotten a sandwich from the dining hall, trying to get some breakfast in before your first class.
"Good morning, sleepyhead," Kent snickers. "You're up before me most of the time."
You shrug, taking a bite of your sandwich.
"I was so tired," you mumble, wiping your mouth with the napkin. "I'm still sore from all the dancing!"
Ajax and Enid soon also join the table as Enid huffs.
"I feel like the paint is still in my hair," she complains. "I mean, it was a good post for my blog, but that dress was my favorite dress ever! "
You let out a chuckle, closing the sandwich container before placing the leftovers in your bag. Yes, the paint was a pain to get out of your hair and your dress has also been stained, but the rest of the evening went splendidly.
After fifteen minutes, the first bell rings, signaling that classes are to start in only five minutes. You sling your backpack onto your back before standing up from the table.
"You ready for Botany?" Bianca smirks.
"Well," you sigh. "Can I use your notes? I can't find any of mine from the last three weeks. I don't know what I did during class, but I know that there is a test coming up and this is not my best subject."
Bianca's smile falters for a second, realizing that you really don't remember a lot about Xavier anymore.
"Yeah, you can sit with me. Might be the easiest anyway."
You nod, entering the class as you greet miss Thornhill. She had already placed some strange plants in the front of the classroom as other students slowly entered the classroom.
Some students already picked a spot, including Wednesday. She is placed next to another person, hair to his shoulders and a frown on his face.
"Good morning, Wednesday!"
You sit down on the opposite side of Bianca as she and the boy sit between you and Wednesday.
He feels familiar. It is almost like he was in a dream. Like you accidentally bumped into him once or twice, only seeing him in your classroom once in a while. It's like the lingering smell of perfume when someone walks past you, or when you see a half-erased line of pencils on a page. He is mesmerizing, yet extremely intimidating. It is almost like you can't rip your eyes off of him, but you are also too scared to keep looking.
Bianca gives you a look before placing her notebook in front of you, making sure that you can read all of it as Thornhill starts talking. You try to write down all she says, making small sketches of the flowers and plants she shows while also trying to write down all the notes from the last few weeks.
"Alright, so, I will be expecting the essays about the Ghost Orchid and at least two more carnivorous plants. No maximum amount of words, but at least 450 words per plant."
Thank God for Bianca's notes. Without those, you would have actually failed this.
"I think I'm going to be doing my homework in the Nightshade library," you whisper to the girl. "I really need to get started on this."
After writing down the last few sentences, you drop your pen. Your hand is cramping from all the writing and your fingers are covered in ink. Only Biology and one hour of fencing left and after that, you were going to sit with the Choir Club, even though you're not a member. You would often hang out with them, sitting on a bench nearby while waiting for your friends to finish. You yourself were actually in the Art Club, but you tend to hang out with other clubs on days that you didn't have any.
A small break after Botany, just long enough to grab a hot drink from the dining hall before getting dressed in your fencing suit again.
"Bianca? You want to team up?"
She raises an eyebrow, smirking while grabbing a saber, switching it from hand to hand.
"I thought you would never ask."
"I can use some competition. And improvement."
Bianca won. Not once, not twice, but five times. You groan as you end up on the floor again, the tip of the saber pointing to your chest. You hold up your hand before pushing yourself up.
"We get it," you let out a laugh before pulling the mask off of your head. "I'm going to need a break."
She holds out her hand, helping you get up before taking her own mask off. The two of you walk towards one of the small wooden benches that sit against the wall of the room, grabbing a bottle of water before cracking it open, and taking big sips.
Everyone else is still training, the clanking of sabers and the sound of shoes against the mats filling up the classroom. You let out a big sigh, pushing some strands of hair out of your face.
"I don't know if I will ever fight you again," you mumble.
"You're getting better," Bianca laughs, closing the bottle back up. "I have seen worse."
You look at everyone around you, some also taking off their masks to catch their breath as Coach walks around, giving out tips and advice where needed.
The boy with the long hair is here again, yet you still don't know where you know him from. Bianca sneakily looks at you, blinking before looking at Xavier. He acted like you weren't even there as he just fenced against Ajax. She does still think the two of you fit together like two pieces of a puzzle, but Xavier first needs to figure himself out. She knows he likes you; it is clear as day. But as long as he acts like this, he doesn't deserve you. Not at all.
Has he always just been in the background? It is like a ghost, you know that you have seen him, yet you don't know where or when.
"One more round?"
-
"I think I'll be heading to the library now," you tell Bianca. "I genuinely don't know what happened these last few weeks, but I am behind on all my homework."
Half of the Choir Club time has passed as they rehearsed their songs for Outreach Day. They were to perform when the new statue in the town square was going to be revealed. But you had more than enough homework to do.
"I might join you later," she sighs. "Some quiet would be nice."
You tell your friends goodbye before slinging your bag over your shoulder, hurrying down the Quad and into the small hidden hallway leading to the Poe statue. With two snaps you get in, making sure that the entrance is closed off again before going down the stairs.
Nice and quiet.
After around forty-five minutes, you hear some more rumbling. Ah, Bianca must be here. You have gotten a lot of work done, actually. The Ghost Orchid part of your essay is already done, now moving on to the Crimson Pitch plant.
"Hey, Bianca!"
The footsteps descend the stairs, but the figure does not belong to Bianca. The tall guy with long hair walks into the library, the one that felt like he lived somewhere in your memory. Your eyes grow big as you immediately throw everything back in your bag. You didn't know that he was a Nightshade as well.
You close your bag hurriedly. Something about him is so intimidating, but he is absolutely mesmerizing at the same time. Why are you so afraid of him? When walking out you accidentally bump into him.
"Sorry," you quickly mumble, running up the stairs before he can even reply.
Bianca is cleaning up when you get out of the library, so you run up to her. Luckily she is still there.
"Can I do my homework in your room? Yoko was inviting some friends to my dorm and..." You look around, making sure no one is around them. "That guy showed up again. The new one."
Bianca clenches her teeth, grabbing the last few papers before stuffing them in her bag, taking your arm to take you up into her room. She can't have Xavier mess this all up. You haven't been this happy in weeks.
You sit down against her bed, laptop on your lap as you are typing away. But the words are getting stuck, the same sentence being rewritten multiple times before finally getting one that slightly makes sense.
"Is he new?"
Bianca turns around on her chair, looking at you.
"Who?"
"The guy with long hair. He was in the Nightshade library. I- I didn't know if he was supposed to be in there because I wasn't sure if he was in our group."
Why does he have to be there at the exact same time as you? It almost makes the Siren Song useless. You might avoid him as much as you can, but he isn't under the spell.
"He's new."
"He's kinda pretty."
Bianca scoffs.
"Pretty weird. It might be best to stay out of his way, he needs to work on himself before making new... friends."
-
Xavier groans, dropping his bag on the floor. You had been fully ignoring him, but to be fair, he totally deserved it. He had noticed you sneaking into the library and his plan was to try and talk to you, but you had fled before he could get one word in.
He had called Ajax, asking him to come down to the library as soon as he could. Xavier spent some time sitting in the room, biting on his lips while bouncing his leg up and down. He really, really fucked up.
Rumbling of stones and footsteps.
Ajax shows up, slightly out of breath. He had ran here from his dorm. Xavier said that there was a big problem and if he was needed in the Nightshade library, it would probably be huge.
"What's up, man?"
"I fucked up," Xavier runs his hands over his face. "Like, really bad."
The Gorgon frowns, looking at his friend. Xavier looks stressed out, more than usual. His hair is messy, his eyes are red and he has big eyebags underneath his eyes.
"What did you do?"
The artist breathes in shakily, pacing around the room while fiddling with his hands.
"I have been a total asshole to Y/N," he mumbles. "I left her at the Rave'n, drenched in that paint, and then she went up to visit me. I wasn't only a horrible date, but I was an even worse friend."
"Xavier?" Ajax asks yet again. "What did you do?"
Xavier breathes out roughly, blinking while pursing his lips. He is too ashamed to say it, but he needs to tell someone. He needs someone to set him straight.
"I treated her like shit. I told her Wednesday was better than she is."
His friend gasps, looking at his friend almost disgusted. How could he have said that to her? After all those nights of the artist hanging out in Ajax's dorm, him smoking some weed while listening to his friend blabber on about how much he liked you, and then he does this?
"What the fuck? Xavier, you have liked her for years, why would you say that?!"
Xavier rubs his eyes. If anyone is disappointed, it's him. He was so in his head that he took it all out on you. Wednesday isn't better than you. He has liked you for the longest time now, and this just messed it all up. Xavier his mental health has been declining, especially now that he is also suspected of being some type of monster. But that isn't your fault. None of it is. You have always, always been there for him, and he just swept you to the side.
"I'm going to be honest, dude," Ajax looks at his friend. "I am really disappointed in you."
"As you should be," Xavier whispers.
"I'll help."
Xavier looks up, kind of shocked. For some reason, he expected Ajax to just abandon Xavier in the library, leaving him to fend for himself.
"Only if you promise to never do this again. Go to Kinbott more, try and talk about your feelings. Y/N never cared, you could show up crying at her dorm at three am and she would make sure that you're fine before she even thinks of going to sleep."
"Ajax- Thank you so much."
"Yeah, yeah. Just try to talk to her. I'm serious, Xavier. You might be my best friend, but this is not cool."
-
For the last two weeks, Xavier had tried to talk to you on multiple occasions. He even sat at your table, though Kent and Bianca were hovering around you, not even letting Xavier get one word in.
During Botany he tried to draw a butterfly, making it float in the air before it quickly gets swatted away by Bianca who just gives Xavier a disgusted stare.
During Fencing he walked up to you, wanting to ask you to train with him like you usually did, but you quickly darted away once you saw him coming for you.
He went down to the Nightshade library to wait for you, yet you never came.
What he did do was 'accidentally' bump into you. He would calculate when he had to stand up to go to class. The first thing you would put in your bag was your notebook, followed by your pencil case. After that you would close the zipper; his sign to stand up. After swinging the bag on your shoulder, you would walk off.
You accidentally bump into someone's back, making the bottle of water that they had in their hand fall.
"Oh, I'm so sorry!"
As you go to pick it up and give it back, you see the boy again. The boy that appeared in your dreams as if they were faint memories. The boy reminded you of ink splatters and the smell of freshly painted walls.
You quickly hand him the bottle, excusing yourself before finding your way to a picnic table again. He makes you nervous, and you don't know in what way. Bianca warned you for him, so all you could do was listen.
In your room, you had a collection of handwritten notes, asking you to meet up in the Nightshade library. You never did. Once you showed them to Bianca, she immediately shook her head.
-
"I don't know what else to do," Xavier furrows his eyebrows, "She just doesn't want to talk to me. I don't blame her for not wanting to, but sometimes she even completely ignores me. As if she doesn't even know my name. I tried everything."
Ajax takes a hit of his joint, his eyes tinted red before he blows it out of the window. The moon is lighting up Nevermore, its stars shining around it.
"Everything?"
"Yeah," Xavier responds. "I tried to talk to her, give her notes, even accidentally bumped into her. But, Bianca and Kent are just acting like bodyguards to her."
"If you want, I can try to talk to her tomorrow."
"You would do that?"
"Yeah," the Gorgon shrugs. "She still talks to me sometimes. Hanging out in the Quad after classes. I'll let you know how it went."
-
"Y/N! Hey!"
Ajax runs up to you, a big smile on his face before he pulls his beanie back down.
"Ajax! It is nice to see you again."
"What are your plans for today?"
Hm, what were your plans? You did really want to go to the Weathervane to get a drink, but considering it is a Thursday, you weren't too sure. There are no shuttle buses today, and walking in the chilly weather for twenty-five minutes didn't sound too appealing.
"I have some homework I still need to do. I was thinking of going to the Nightshade library to study. Want to join?"
The boy eagerly shakes his head, following you through the hall and down the stairs. The small table gets filled with books, pens, and notebooks. Ajax didn't really take a lot of homework, but he did provide some snacks.
The two of you talked about all different types of things. How he was planning on asking out Enid, how you expected Outreach Day to go, which homework you were doing, and much more.
"Can I maybe ask you something personal?"
You hum, looking up from your paper.
"Of course."
"I was just wondering," he awkwardly laughs. "What happened at the Rave'n?"
"I have no idea," you shrug. "I think there were some Normies who set off the sprinklers. All I know is that my dress is still stained and that, whatever it was, really burned my eyes."
Ajax frowns, what are you talking about?
"Yeah, no, I was there. One beanie destroyed," he chuckles. "But I meant more like... After the Rave'n. What happened?"
It is your turn to be confused.
"Well... I showered, tried to wash the stains out of my clothes, and then hung out with Bianca."
Do you just really not remember?
"What? No, Y/N, I mean... What happened with you and Xavier?"
Even more confusion spreads on your face as you put your pen down on the paper. What is he talking about? All you did was dance, drink punch, took a break, danced more, and then went to clean yourself from the sticky red paint. And who is he talking about?
"Who is Xavier?"
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mapoeggplant · 3 months ago
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skip to loafer chapter 62 analysis // spoilers
skip to loafer reiterated its message of "i love you as a person" in a soft and fun chapter. and with that, takamatu-sensei prepares us for a new arc that promises to be full of unforgettable moments.
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(since the translation is still very fresh, i'll try to focus more on using the raws not to spoil anyone. i hope you understand that!!)
honestly, i find light chapters like this the hardest to analyze on their own, especially ones like chapter 62 that brings back several loose ends in order to tie up another knot before continuing the journey. so, instead of analyzing the chapter itself, i'm going to bring back some old debates and fit them into this new phase of each character.
even though friendship was the main point of the chapter, in my opinion mika also deserves her own spotlight since, in one way or another, she basically served as a bond between the two groups.
in the case of the boys, her name is brought up when shima reveals that he invited her to his travel group, without much thought of the consequences. this causes a certain amount of anger in mukai, who was the person who witnessed very closely mika's reactions before and after the confession (and even later, when she was talking to nao by the beach). however, he’s also one of shima’s oldest friends, so he knows exactly what he been through, which is te exactly reason why he acts impulsively. 
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it's as if he were between two different oceans, not knowing which way to go, since both are too turbulent for him to navigate. it's hard for mukai to completely side with his friend, since mika's feelings are still very vivid to him, but he knows all the difficulties that shima went through regarding her own internal terrors, that’s why he holds himself back to not curse him or anything. what he ends up choosing is the safest rote, which is to scold him with an open heart, making sure to show that what he did was wrong. in the end, he won’t explain it to shima the exact reason why he’s mad because he knows he doesn’t have the rights to speak for mika, that’s why the message gets a little confusing for shima, who’s still learning and growing (and honestly, the reacting of stop to understand where mukai was coming from is actually a big step for him, which i appreciate). 
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in the case of the girls, mika is also the only one who, up until now, knows about the events before and after the confession. she can see the sincerity and kindness behind shima, who continues to respect and see her as a friend, but it's hard not to assume a protective position when the new person to be affected by the same feelings is mitsumi, someone who she became so important to her. and that's where her growth as a character is slowly revealed.
mika has always created her own barrier and has had difficulty opening up to the girls. and that didn’t start recently, since she have been dealing with her insecurities for as long as she can remember. mika spend most of her childhood alone and had a hard time to make friends when she started her teenage years, which led her to have a very abrupt start when she met mitsumi, yuzu and makoto. for her, it has always been very difficult to see herself in a group of friends and to be comfortable with herself to the point of expressing her mind clearly. 
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as the story go by, we can see how comfortable mika is now with the girls, but old habits are hard to erase. even with all her conversations with nao and the peace she feels around her friends, there are still a lot to be unfold and a lot to grow. 
however, for her to grow, she needs to keep trying. and that’s when she choses to shine in this chapter: she finally manages to open up to mitsumi and reveal the secret that corrupts her so much. 
ever since mitsumi confessed the relationship she and shima had, mika has been struggling with indecision about whether to open up or keep the event forever as a bad memory from the past. it's hard for her, since she doesn't want to lose mitsumi's friendship or the other girls', but she also needs to accept what happened in order to finally say goodbye to them. it's not that she doesn't have her feelings cleared up inside her or that they still have a chance to blossom again. what really hits her is the fact that she's hiding something she considers important from her best friends, which might results in a awkward situation later on. 
the moment mika admits out loud that mitsumi is much more important in her life than any past crush, mika is finally saying goodbye to this weight she's carried for so long and can finally start another chapter in her life. now, she no longer has anything hidden or needs to walk on eggshells — the love she embraced and the love she receives are enough for her to stand tall. 
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the development of skip to loafer's friendships is indeed something that needs to be celebrated. throughout the narrative, we are constantly reminded that the story itself is built on the idea that love doesn't need to be romantic to be true, it just needs to be felt. loving someone is accepting their flaws and understanding their scars, like mukai and shima; loving someone is being vulnerable, like mika and mitsumi; loving someone is going out together to buy clothes for a trip they've been waiting for.
it's beautiful to see how the girls care about mitsumi and her feelings, but still root for her happiness and are excited for her. it's beautiful to see how they're always together in difficult times, whether they're big or small (or even medium, like what's the right outfit to wear on a date. that's very important for a teenage girl). 
and for shima and mitsumi, it’s cute to see how shy they are around each other and how they are allowed to slowly understand their feelings. the narrative doesn’t force them to anything at any point or rushes them to a resolution, what it does is explore the nuances and difficulties of dealing with your first ever romantic love, specially when you were never allowed to explore your own feelings in the first place (like shima), and the fear of losing a best friend that you cares so much (like mitsumi feels). 
i don’t think this is the calm before the storm, but i do believe takamatsu-sensei is getting us ready for what’s coming next. i do believe this will be a very decisive arc for a lot of characters, but it will also birth many more plots for us to explore.
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thank you so much for reading 💛 don't forget to support the author if you can and also thank the translation group!!
and if you're interested, i wrote a while ago an analysis about skip to loafer's "i love you as a person" message. just click here to find it!
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quietzap · 20 days ago
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how do you navigate your feelings towards ziam and cheryl/bear/kate/maya on top of this immense grief? i don't mean to be insensitive but i haven't found an answer for myself yet, i can't believe we'll never get answers now
(To anyone seeing this, read until the end before saying anything thank you.) Well. I'm gonna ramble a bit but bear with me. Spotify played Let Me and Common on shuffle the other day and I cried a bit. It's unfair. It should've never ended this way. But I had already accepted ages ago that we might never know the truth. I still have my beliefs. That Zayn and Liam were together. Maybe they had broken up who knows but if they did then I still truly believe their bond was a once-in-a-lifetime thing. I've gone through so many emotions this past week. But seeing the posts of cheryl etcetc or people mentioning bear (Zayn was the only one who didn't fwiw), it didn't make me feel anything. Maybe bc I had already accepted we couldn't do anything about the stunts, and/or maybe bc it's still difficult for me to accept he's really gone or bc it doesn't matter to me at this moment. Or bc I haven't actually sat down to think about what it means that he's gone. I've just been thinking of the pain all of Liam's loved ones are in right now and will be in for the foreseeable future. And I include Zayn in this. I also don't really want to think about it bc I think I might get angry. We've all seen Liam's video on snapchat from last month, where he said he was stunting and forced to do things he didn't want to do and to send help. I often used to say that I didn't understand why the boys accepted this situation instead of just getting out, consequences be damned. Ofc it's easier said than done. But I thought maybe they thought it was worth it in some way. But then, Louis got out. Zayn got out. (In some way, I mean they have privacy and a real career, like Niall and Harry). I guess I will never understand why Liam was still the only one so stuck in this shitty situation. Why couldn't he live his life in peace like Zayn and only appear when he released music? Why couldn't he find a better team or why did he even accept to go along for so long? Why did people let him? Why?! That's what I want to know. Fucking why. And I want Liam's image/reputation to be redeemed. Anyway I digressed I'm sorry.
I just sincerely hope Zayn will be ok. Jaymi who was in Union J lost his soon-to-be-husband a couple months ago (Olly was buried the day they were supposed to get married last month). They'd been together for 14 years. And Olly died in similar circumstances (a fall from the 3rd floor of a hotel). And as incredibly awful as this is, knowing that other people are going through similar grief helps a bit, and I hope it will help Zayn and Liam's loved ones know they're not alone.
Idek if I've answered your question. I guess basically the stunts don't cross my mind coz it's not important to me. These past few years when Liam was alive it wasn't important (tho I hated it) bc I accepted the boys made their own choices. And now it's not important bc it won't bring Liam back and bc his loved ones matter more to me. Now, if I'm actually wrong about my beliefs then it is what it is and I feel for his exes/gf/child, and if the maya thing is true I still think addiction made him act that way and that if he'd got a chance to really get better this wouldn't have happened again. If I'm not wrong tho, I truly feel for Zayn who doesn't get to grieve the way he deserves to. Tho I'm glad he has loved ones who know the truth and who can support him the right way.
I hope this helps. Feel free to tell me if you want to discuss this further or anything ❤️
(Link to the videos of Liam from snapchat: x)
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rubydubydoo122 · 11 months ago
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As much as I hate to say it, and as much as I love Jason ToddI'm gonna need DC to kill him again, and keep him dead this time.
Now before you come at me, let me explain why I think this. Jason Todd is a character that while alive will always be connected to Gotham, and because of his differing morals with Batman, he will always be in a cycle of conflict with him. We saw it in UTRH, we saw it in RHATO, we saw it in Gotham Wars. Because Jason isn't a villain (I feel like in UTRH he was an anti-hero, and any actions that didn't align with the morals he set during that time is because he was villainized by Batman) Bruce's actions feel overtly brutal (batarang to the neck, beating him so har his helmet broke, chemically altering him to feel fear) especially since it's towards his SON the one he claims to have mourned. It's a vicious cycle that isn't fair to Jason, and it's major character assassination of Bruce. It's overdone and I am sick and tired of it, but I do not see either characters backing down from their moral stances.
Now you might be thinking, just because Bruce and Jason don't get along doesn't mean they can't make up-- they've tried. Multiple time. Every time Jason and Bruce take a step in the direction of being close to each other again, Bruce becomes a control freak and abuses Jason like he's his own personal punching bag, and there's only so many times someone can forgive someone before enough is enough.
But I still haven't explained why specifically I think Jason should die again. And it's because of two reasons. Jason deserves peace, and as long as he's a ghost walking on earth, he won't be able to get that. Also because it would make Great Angst. We all know Bruce would break if he lost Jason again. He's going to push everyone away, and if you're going to have Bruce push everyone away, give him consequences for his actions.but we saw how protective Dick got during Gotham Wars. Just imagine Dick walking up towards Bruce and saying, "It might've been my fault last time for not picking up his calls, but this time, you can't deny that this, is all your fault." "How dare you! He was my son!" "You lost him once, and when he came back you treated him worse than any of the loonies in Arkham. You don't miss him at all. You only feel guilty because of your goddamned savior complex. You only treat him like your son when he's dead."
and while we're at it, maybe Tim can have a complete crisis. He had to pick up the pieces of Bruce in the aftermath of Jason's death last time, and look where that got him. All of his friends and family died. He was never truly recognized for guiding Bruce out of the dark, and we all know that Tim is one inconvenience from killing a bitch. Maybe this is it. I actually think it would be hilarious for Tim to take up the Red Hood mantle, Only to screw with Bruce. Because he knows that's what Jason would've wanted.
Have Damian afraid of what Bruce has become in guilt. Have Damians castle of worship for his father come tumbling down, because Damian always knew his father loved all of the previous Robins more than him, and if his father no longer wanted them, what was stopping Bruce from sending him back to the League.
Like DC if you're going to use Jason as a catalyst for an event, kill him off again. last time it was on a whim. This time, do it on purpose. This time, give his death a purpose. This time, make sure his death changes something, because god, Bruce has fucked up so much.
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scho17 · 1 month ago
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@hibiscusseaart
Ren Nohara
Ren and Kks doodles + me yapping ab this AU bc the brain rot has me in a chokehold
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close ups so yall dont have to zoom in
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I JUST REALIZED THIS WOULD MEAN THAT NARUTO IS TECHNICALLY ALSO THE HATAKE CLAN HEIR URAGHHHH
I NEED TO DRAW HIM WITH ALL THE NINKEN SO SO BADDDDDD
KAKASHI SHARING CLAN LORE BC HE HAS PACK TO CARRY ON HIS CLANS HISTORY AND TRADITIONS BC IT ISN'T JUST HIM ANYMORE SAVE ME SAVE ME
Hatake 'the line ends with me' Kakashi BUT NOT ANYMORE BABY HELL YEAH!! having a spouse and child will do that to you
Now does he really gaf ab tradition? Honestly, probably not but the idea of him not being alone in terms of family/clan is what he deserves (along with a lot of therapy).
HE MAY STILL BE MENTALLY ILL BUT NOT AS BADLY AS THE FIRST TIME AROUND 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Also, the consequences of Naruto having two parents who are both some of the most elite shinobi in Konoha is probably one of the best 'fuck off' deterrents he could have in terms of curbing harassment over his being the nine-tails container.
ALSO ALSO, "I'm gonna be Hokage!" oh and he's wearing those little blue goggles and carrying around the weight of a dead boy's dream without really knowing just how heavy that burden is but still carrying it all the same in the way only optimistic children can. Oh bitch I'm throwing up everywhere. Like yes he's going to bring peace to the shinobi world but he is also giving both his dad's the worst type of heart ache. Seeing doubles because he's so much like Obito but blonde and four times as stubborn.
kkrn trying so hard not to see ghosts in their kid but he's literally a mash up of Minato, Kushina, and Obito. Minato's kindness, Kushina's vitality, and Obito's pure will to be good.
Not saying that ghosts are all they see cause it's very much not. Naruto is still Naruto but sometimes there's that outline of an old memory that just doesn't fade. A little like deja vu I guess. Kakashi and Ren are so glad it's peacetime because even the thought of dandelion blonde beneath a too-big boulder makes breathing that much harder.
I imagine he gets trained an insane amount because both Kakashi and Ren want him to be able to defend himself. Even while it's peacetime, they're shinobi, there's always a risk. So long as Naruto is on active duty he'll always be in danger. With both of his guardians growing up/serving in the third war when they were barely older than Naruto it's practically a given.
Not that I think Naruto would complain about being able to learn jutsu/shinobi skills. He'd probably be stoked about it until he has to spend like four hours straight throwing shuriken and reading survival guides about edible plants. He complains about it. Loudly. mb lil bro half of ninja training is literally just ingraining reflexes and learning the land.
mmm academy-era Naruto going to the memorial stone and ranting about his day to it in the way he's seen both Ren and Kakashi do in the past. That's so cute and sad like "and then Shikamaru slept the whole time but it was supposed to be a GROUP project! Can you believe that!" and Obito is in the bushes nodding his head along like the good uncle he is. (He literally tried to murder Naruto when he was less than an hour old.)
Naruto just talks and talks and talks. About everything and nothing and its probably like the least depressing one-sided conversation Obito has ever heard in front of his grave (looking at you Kakashi, Ren).
I imagine that Naruto kind've treats the stone/Obito's memory fondly. Both Ren and Kakashi talk about him in warm tones and with growing up hearing stories of him it's hard not to feel like he knows him. He's not there, obviously, but if Naruto closes his eyes and imagines that scowling boy in his parent's team photo while he talks it almost feels real. (Honey, you've got a big storm coming.)
To their family, Obito is forever thirteen. He's passionate and has a short fuse. He loves sweets and has eyes and hair darker than the night, he's a sucker for a sob story and helps old ladies with their groceries. Naruto finds it hard not to see a friend in a ghost he's never met.
AA and then post Uchiha Massacre, Naruto just stares at the stone and wonders that if Obito were still here would he be gone too? Man I need to see what's going on in Obito's head during that.
On an unrelated note i wonder where the fuck Jiraiya is in all this. Bro is just out and about doing fuck all as two fourteen year olds take care of his godson and he's running from responsibility😭 i bet he sends guilt money. Ren literally doesn't give a single shit because even if Jiraiya did try for custody he would literally be getting his hands chopped off. No way in hell is Ren letting a pervert like that raise a kid that's a recipe for disaster. The money is nice but Ren could not give less of a fuck ab that mans guilt. Like "oh, you feel bad for not owning up to your God Father title that Minato, my late sensei, entrusted to you? Good."
I need to see Ren and Genma + Anko and Kurenai friendship. They would be a horrible terrible no good amazing friend group. Terrifying when together. Four horsemen of the apocalypse when they have an idea and put their mind to it.
Anyway, what are our opinions on ANBU Ren and Ren meeting 'Sukea' bc that all i've been able to think ab today. Okay, I'm done yapping thanks for listening.
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blackbird5154 · 4 months ago
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I'd like to talk about why Rite Here Rite Now has script problems (as well as Ghost lore in general).
Even taking into account that this is a concert movie, a movie in which the presentation of the characters is of secondary importance, there are still certain requirements to that presentation. Over the years, we have been told a story. There is an expectation that there is some consistency in that story: causes must produce effects. I'm talking about the point that in a “good story” the actions of the characters have consequences. If a cold-blooded murder occurs, the characters responsible must either go through an arc of remorse or receive some sort of retribution for their actions. You can't kill three iconic characters and just forget about that and move on. The consequences can be different, depending on how the author wants to develop this theme. But they have to be.
I'm not really clear on how Tobias is developing Copia. The first time he appeared, he threatened Terzo behind his back and promised to stomp him into the dirt. You can still find that video on the official Instagram. Obviously, he was involved in the murder that Sister organized and had a vested interest, or maybe he was even an executioner himself. Either way, he ascended to the position over the corpses of his predecessors, and that's clearly what he was aiming for. Even the introduction to RHRN shows him as a maximally selfish character who thinks only of his own success and survival: he believes that he is a better entertainer than his brothers and that he doesn't deserve the same fate. However, the movie tries to instill in us that Copia is a good man who is worthy of sympathy and hope that his fate will be better than his predecessors. I wonder why exactly he has earned such privileges.
Sister Imperator is portrayed from the beginning to the very end as an overbearing, dominant, cruel woman. She obviously hated the brothers and didn't just organize their murder, but did it with relish (a cruel joke just before the injection). She has taken over all the remaining characters, becoming the de facto leader of the Clergy, and has succeeded in building her empire. She controls Copia's every step and also tells Nihil what to do. Yes, we're shown the motherly side of Sister in the movie: she seems to really love her son and wants to leave him an empire to inherit. But that doesn't atone for her cruel behavior, sadism and the crimes she has committed in the past.
Nihil is shown as an irresponsible and weak-willed man, an unreliable lover, a careless father who allows his sons to die. He tends to wallow in fantasies, replacing reality with them and allowing horrific events to happen literally in front of his nose. He was a bad father to his official sons and a bad father to Copia. He is probably the only one in the movie who went through personal growth: he was finally able to talk to his youngest son, finally became a good father to him. But his older sons are still dead and it doesn't seem to be a problem for him.
Apparently, Tobias decided to move from more gory plots to more family-oriented ones. All three characters are now presented as a caring, somewhat weird, but loving family. Their past has been left out of the picture. They haven't drawn conclusions from their mistakes, they haven't atoned for their wrongs, they haven't gotten what they deserve. The screenwriter seems to have forgotten that the members of this family recently killed each other with minimal regret. It doesn't matter now, because the previous characters are just “taxodermically propped up” stuff. The woman who manipulated other people and destroyed everyone who stood in the way of her ambitious plans, dies a peaceful death in the family circle, having achieved all her goals and leaving an inheritance to her son. A happy ending for the sadistic bitch. She's now a positive character, and her peaceful death closes the possibility for a fairer ending to this arc.
Copia who all along demonstrated passivity, infantilism and inability to make any decision, also got his happy ending. You may feel differently about Copia, but I still remember him wearing Terzo's white gloves in concert like some kind of trophy. I remember him threatening Terzo in a tape deck commercial. Why have we all collectively decided to forget that? This is a man who got everything for free, thanks to his mother's patronage. We're even shown how he spends his free time: playing video games, loafing around and avoiding adult responsibilities like paying bills. He just goes with the flow, accepting the blood-stained regalia that is handed to him. And now once again we see another promotion just falling into his lap. What did he do to deserve it? Yes, I agree, he did a good job on stage during his eras. So did the First, the Second and the Third! However, now they are “taxodermically propped up” and he is Frater Imperator.
Apparently Tobias is now targeting a younger audience and use a more pedagogical style. If this is true, perhaps he should have shown how the characters take responsibility for their past. The statement “live here and now, stop thinking about the past” sounds immoral coming from the mouths of characters who have committed multiple murders and have not repented of them. Injustice and inconsistency are two words that come to mind when I think about how this story ended. Sometimes I feel like these characters are just plastic toys for Tobias to play with, and in the process he forgets where the game started.
The problem is that some do remember. Some remember everything.
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average-hyperfixator · 6 days ago
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This is probably the weirdest way to show that I'm in the Mouthwashing fandom, and like nobody is going to see this BUT
If I see ONE MORE person compare Ted to Jimmy I'm going to LOSE MY FUCKING MIND. Is this another testament to people not understanding Ted's overall role in the story and his character arc? YES, YES IT IS. RE READ THE BOOK. RE LISTEN TO THE RADIO DRAMA. GAME IS IT'S OWN CONVERSATION THAT WILL TAKE TOO LONG FOR ME TO DISECT + IT HAS IT'S OWN STORY AND THUS WILL NOT BE INCLUDED HERE.
Jimmy is a jealous man, who assaults (and unfortunately impregnates) Anya, and then tries to crash the ship so he doesn't have to deal with the consequences, and when everyone lives, they live in misery BECAUSE OF HIM. He is the co-pilot, he has more power and authority over the others, and he ACTIVELY makes things worse, and is at fault for the crash and the subsequent fallout. (this section is shorter, simply because I've been in the IHNMAIMS fandom much longer and have way more thoughts on Ted) Ted, on the other hand, is not at fault for the world ending. He is just as trapped as the other five, he's more prone to mental manipulation and THINKING he's better off, but he really isn't. He doesn't have more power of the others because he's also a victim. He is by no means a great guy, or even a good guy; They key difference is that at the end of his story, the book, he actually fucking HELPS. Rather than make his friends continue to live in misery, he puts them out of it, and rather than end his own suffering, he spends those precious few seconds he could be ramming an icicle into himself, comforting Ellen as she dies. It doesn't make up for what he's thought and said, BUT, it's something at least. It's remorse, it's letting her finally be content, it's trying to give her the empathy she showed him time and time again. And he gets turned into a horrid slug creature after, he actively suffers more than everyone else for the rest of time- he self sacrifices so his friends could be at peace. TLDR: Jimmy is objectively selfish and doesn't change much throughout the game, save for MAYBE the very end (ig putting Curly in the pod is one brownie point for him) however Ted actually shows growth by the end of the story, and makes a point to end the suffering of his friends, while ultimately sacrificing himself in the process. If I catch another person equating these two I'm just gonna start throwing hammers at them I DON'T CARE. I am THE Ted defender, and I WILL stand my ground that, while he is no where near perfect, he DOES become a better person by the end of the story and deserves to have that acknowledged. anyway this has been sick rants with me, feel free to add on in reblogs or perchance spark a FRIENDLY debate. I apologize if I come off rude here, Ted and IHNMAIMS have been a hyperfixation of mine for months and I am very easily riled up about the story and characters. adding new tag ; Jace rants 🗯️ ! For all my ranting escapades from now on.
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moonlitstoriess · 3 months ago
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Passionate Storms-Ruhn Danaan x reader (2/2)
Warnings: some more angst, fluff at the end
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This wasn't the plan.
Ruhn didn't think this is how everything would end up happening.
Him, back in the apartment, alone, standing over the counter, reading the note his mate left for him.
I am leaving for some time. I will talk to you if-not when-if I feel ready.
You finally got the peace and quiet you so desperately wanted so don't come looking for me.
Ruhn had the shittiest day ever. First, his brother Tristan Flynn, had the 'loveliest' idea to bring the fire sprites into work at the Auxiliary which led to an unstoppable chaos that resulted in him having to sort the mess out. Why did no one tell him that being the leader of the Aux is never going to be easy?
Then, as if that catastrophe wasn't enough, he had to attend multiple meetings regarding the jobs of the new unions within the city. Ever since the end of the war, the shifters and the fae aren't getting into much of a brawl either, thanks to also Ithan who keeps his pack in check, but from time to time, things happens and Ruhn had to make sure he chose proper units to guard specific locations where these kinds of brawls may happen.
After what felt like a lifetime at work, Ruhn couldn't wait to get his hands on the little surprise he was planning for his darling, his love, his mate.
A specially handcrafted bracelet that he was planning on giving her on their dinner date that he would take her out on tonight with flowers and music.
His y/n deserved that.
Well, guess what? That didn't go as planned either.
He took the gift before admiring and gushing over how perfect for y/n it is. Ruhn hid it inside his leather jackets pocket before heading home, thinking and smiling about how he was going to tell y/n that he was taking her out on a date.
But, as predicted, another shifter and fae fight was happening in the middle of the street and seemingly the very unit he picked for the job was unable to put a complete end to this fight.
With a sigh and a shake of his head, Ruhn quickly headed towards the commotion, shouting "Hey! What do you think you're doing?! This is a children's playground, dumbasses, no fights allowed!"
One of the wolves growled right back at him, "Fuck off if you know what's good for you!"
At this point, his soldiers were busy holding some of the fae and wolves back but this one specific wolf seemed to like the drama. Well, too bad he isn't going to like it when he finds himself with a fine of a hundred gold marks.
Ruhn now stood chest to chest with the male whose head was completely shaved off in a buzzcut, displaying his blond roots as his wild and icy eyes stared deep into Ruhn's soul. But he knew better than to be intimidated by some street rat.
Ruhn kept his voice steady yet firm as he said, "You are starting useless fights on a territory where children come to play. Faelings. You are on our territory. If you don't back off now, you won't like the consequences."
The wolf only snickered as he said, "Oh, really? I am so scared that I think I just peed my pants."
Ruhn curled his hand into a fist, "Last chance. Back. Off."
"Go to hell, prince."
Ruhn turned his head to one of his soldiers. "Give me the handcuff-"
A hard blow to his jaw. That fucking-
And that is how the following steps ensued:
1.Ruhn began beating the shit out of the shifter
2.His soldiers began taking-or rather trying to take-the other shifters away
3.A whole commotion happened as some of the shifters managed to get away and try to take their friend from under Ruhn
4.Ruhn ended up being in the middle of a full blown fight between shifters and fae, at some point having his phone knocked out of his jean pockets.
By the end of it, he had everyone cuffed as his soldiers sent them to the Aux. Luckily, he managed to keep his face clean, only getting blows on his body. Unluckily, his phone was in a shit condition now after being harshly thrown on the ground by one of the idiots and kept on lagging as he tried to answer his girlfriends call.
No success. Whatever, he will get home and explain everything and then tomorrow buy a new phone. Atleast the present is here-
Where. Is. The. Bracelet.
Ruhn began checking all his pockets but found nothing. He began panicking as he looked around only to find the box on the ground. He sighed and sent a quick prayer up to the Gods for the bracelet to be intact-
It was not, in fact, intact.
The bracelet was broken in half, its small jewels shattered.
Oh, he was definitely going to make that shifters life hell now.
Ruhns mood completely soured. He couldn't go home right now, not now. He couldn't look into his mate's happy, beautiful face and put on a fake smile. He needed to collect his thoughts which is why he headed straight to the bar.
There, he sat down and ordered himself a drink, completely drunk already on his overthinking. His surroundings were a buzz and a blur as Ruhn nursed his drink in one hand while blaming himself for everything. And the constant calls from his mate that he couldn't answer were not helping at all.
He was truly the worst. Couldn't even do one thing right. Can't properly lead the Aux, can't do something nice for his mate, his future wife, what are you good for, Ruhn?
He had planned this night differently. He had planned to gift her the custom bracelet that took months to design and make from scratch, then he planned to put it on her wrist before kissing her and telling her to go get ready.
Everything had gone to absolute shit and honestly? Ruhn didn't think he could look at his mate's face right now knowing what he has done.
"Ruhn? Is that really you?"
He turned his head sideways to see....Nixie. A small nymph that was once close friends with y/n. He didn't like her. Not one bit. Especially not after she tried to make clear moves on him before Ruhn rudely and quite frankly rejected her.
However, it seems like she hasn't learned her lesson yet.
Ruhn gave her an annoyed look before wordlessly turning his head back around and trying to once again answer y/n's call but from the looks of it, his phone won't be making it another day.
"Is that y/n constantly calling you? Gosh, she hasn't changed has she? The same chattering monkey that she was when we were frien-"
"Tell one more thing about my mate, Nixie, and I won't hesitate to put you in your place right now."
"Oh, come on Ruhn, you know I would always make a better match for you. We don't have to be mates to-"
Ruhn got up, forcing the nymph to stagger backwards as he pushed her harshly aside with his body, causing her to hit a table, and stalked towards the doors.
He turned his head sideways and said over his shoulders, "If you ever come near me or try to start a conversation with me again, I will do much worse than just push you. Fuck off."
Nixie's whole presence made him even more drained by the time he got home.
Ruhn hoped that his mate would be asleep when he entered the house but the smell of delicious and newly cooked pasta confirmed that she was, in fact, not asleep. And then the sight of his beloved, coming over to him, still all smiley and lovely with the clear exhaustion of the day weighing on her made him feel very ashamed of himself.
He couldn't do it. Not now. Not now.
Then, she kept trying to talk to him, to make him open up and on a normal day, he would. He would talk about his day but not before he listened to her talk about hers. They would eat, they would talk and joke some more, kiss and cuddle. But not tonight. Tonight, Ruhn's mind was very frustrated. With everyone, with himself but not her. Never y/n. Never his sweet, beautiful mate.
But it seems like Ruhn really enjoys ruining everything good for himself because he ended up shouting at his girlfriend, leaving to sit at the bench in the park outside for ten minutes, coming back into the apartment to find himself in the current condition.
Him alone with only shame, guilt, anger and worry as his companions, staring into the note in his hands.
He truly, in every sense of the word, fucked up. But unlike everything else, he wasn't going to let this one good thing get away from him. He will get his y/n back.
"I don- I don't understand why would he do such a thing? Why would he be so rude? What have I done to h-hurt him?"
"Shhh, nothing. You have done absolutely nothing to hurt him, sis. He is just being his famous idiot self."
After y/n left the house, she headed straight to her sisters apartment in the other end of the city, intending to hopefully stay there with her for a while. Atleast until she had cleared her mind.
Her sister, Alexia, gave y/n another box of tissues as she cried nonstop since the minute she arrived here two hours ago.
Alexia sighed as her phone suddenly ringed but y/n was too busy wiping the tears that kept blurring her eyes to hear her sisters say "Oh, for Urd's sake!" as she picked up the phone, gave a small reassuring pat to y/n's shoulder and left the room, coming back what felt like an eternity later with some tea.
"Stop. Stop wasting away your tears on that punk. Here, I brought you favorite tea. Jasmine."
As they sat there on the couch, curled up in blankets, chatting while drinking, y/n almost forgot her pain. Almost.
It hurt too much to forget and ignore. She loved Ruhn and definitely didn't wan't to walk away permanently but...what if she should-
The doorbell began to ring. Y/n furrowed her eyebrows before looking at her sister who just shrugged and said nonchalantly, yawning as she got more comfortable on the couch, "Could you please open it? My legs have been killing me all day, honestly should get some treatment for them. It gets worse every day."
Y/n nodded before getting up and heading towards the door. Once she opened it, there was absolutely no one standing on the other side. She sighed as she tried closing the door but it wouldn't budge.
Y/n looked down to find a small basket filled with some of her favorite snacks standing right in front of her doorstep. She leaned down to pick it when a small handwritten note fell out of it right on to the floor.
Y/n bent down to pick it and gasped when she saw what's written inside it.
My love,
I know you said not to come looking for you but I couldn't just stand by knowing that what I have done was a terrible mistake. I called your sister to ask if you were with her and when she said yes, I wasted no time in preparing this basket for you and having it delivered. Until you feel comfortable enough to face me, I will be sending you small little things each day. I know what I did was wrong and I am hoping to see you soon so that I can explain myself better. Until then, enjoy your favorites.
From your idiot of a mate who loves you beyond words,
Ruhn
Y/n's eyes widened as she reread the letter multiple times, thinking that her eyes were lying to her. At last, with a tiny smile creeping up her face, she turned around and headed back into the living room.
And so it continued for the next few weeks. Every single day there was a new small little surprise waiting for her at the door. The best part, however, were the little notes he would put with them.
One day, he sent her some of her most frequently used cremes and scents with a note saying, 'Your scent for me is the definition of being at home'
Next, in the morning, it was a basket filled with coffee and breakfast from her most favorite cafe, 'I miss you more and more each passing hour'
Tickets for the show she had been talking about nonstop for a while, 'The dates were finally revealed. Go enjoy it, my love.'
This went on and on until two weeks later, she couldn't take it anymore, she had to see him.
Her hands shaking, she texted the number she had been avoiding for two weeks now.
I want to meet you today.
His reply was instant
I will send you the address. Be ready by 8PM tonight, love.
Was she doing the right thing? Y/n was sure of her undying love for her mate and it seems like he was truly sorry for what he had done but....it would be better to finally talk face to face. Not to mention the fact that she did greatly miss his face.
He sent her the address and- what was this place? Y/n didn't dwell on it too long, deciding to prepare and wear something nice to meet Ruhn. After all, it has been a while since she last saw him.
By 8, she was done and ready, Alexia helping her to do the final touch ups while offering words of affirmation.
"If he even does one thing wrong, get out and dump his ass."
"You look beyond stunning, sis. If he dares to break your heart ONE MORE time, I swear-"
Y/n smiled, putting her hand on Alexia's shoulder. "I will be fine, Ruhn won't knowingly hurt me, Alexia."
Her sister just scoffed. "You know, it's really unclear with that bastard."
Y/n hugged her sister tightly before leaving and heading towards her newly fixed car.
Nearly an hour later, she made it to the location Ruhn sent her. It was some kind of a tall building but....why wasn't anyone around? Whatever, with a deep breath, she entered it and walked towards the elevator, pressing on the highest floor.
When the doors opened, she was greeted with the most breathtaking sight ever. It seems like the elevator opens up straight to the roof because above there were only glittering lights that were held up by columns. The lights also wrapped around the columns, causing one to feel like they are in a completely different realm.
In front of her, she had a full view of the busy city in the nighttime. Around her, were multiple soft areas for sitting but it was the very center that got her.
A table for two with a candle in the middle and....Ruhn standing in front of it, looking devastatingly handsome while holding a huge bouquet of roses.
Her eyes were still wide as she took in the entire place, slowly approaching him, coming to stand chest to chest with him. He looked down to her and whispered, "This- I got these for you. You look breathtaking."
She took the roses from him, eyes never leaving each other as she whispered back, "Thank you, this is...very beautiful."
He smiled lovingly at her and asked, "May I?"
She smiled back slightly. "Yes."
Ruhn took her hand, placing a gentle kiss on it before leading her to sit down. She sat down but he didn't. He kept standing by her side, looking at her with an unreadable expression.
"Ruhn?"
And suddenly, Ruhn was a goner. His eyes seemingly welled up with tears as he got down on his knees without any hesitation, making y/n gasp as he looked down onto his own hands clutching his pants.
"Ruhn-"
"These two weeks have been hell without you, my love. Hell. In fact, I would have loved it more if the princes of Hell came to take me to their realm rather than ever be without you. I couldn't eat, drink, sleep, work or do anything, for that matter, without my shame and guilt consuming me whole. I have been slowly but surely descending into madness untill you texted me this morning and I- y/n, I have to make this right. Please, you can't leave me. I love you too much."
"Ruhn look at-"
Ruhn shook his head and said everything in one breath "No, please, listen to me, my love. What I did was wrong. Very fucking wrong and I am beyond sorry, beyond ashamed and beyond guilty for what I made you feel. My whole day had gone to utter shit and- and long story short- I got into fights, broke my phone, which is why I couldn't answer you, had to deal with crazy fire sprites invading the Aux thanks to that little shit Tristan, had to attend multiple meetings with annoyingly egotistic leaders, and worst of all....broke your surprise, the one I had been excited for months. I had planned to surprise you with that gift and a date that day but....clearly the Urd wasn't on my side and then the whole Nixie situation happened because I was so mad at myself that I went to the bar to drink something but sheturnedupthereandstartedmakingmovesonmebutIignoredherplease-"
"Ruhn, dear, slow down, I don't understand anything."
"She turned up there and started making moves on me but I ignored her I swear, I swear I ignored her! She tried to insult you but I made sure that she won't ever come near either of us. I just- that day I was out of my mind, I know it was no excuse for what I did but please, you aren't annoying, you are definitely NOT a chattering monkey. I love you and your bubbly personality, please never stop talking when you are with me, your voice gives me so much comfort. Iloveyoutoomuchtoolooseyoumyloveplease-"
"Ruhn, you're fast again. And please, look up at me."
He shook his head
"Ruhn-"
"I don't deserve you, I don't deserve you-"
"Ruhn Danaan will you please, for the love of Urd, shut up and look at me?"
He finally lifted his head upwards to look at her and oh, Gods...he was crying. His eyes have gone absolutely red and tears are staining his cheeks.
She put a gentle palm on his cheek, causing him to place his hand over hers and kiss her wrist.
Y/n smiled, "I understand, Ruhn. I think- I think I also behaved wrongly. I should have read the signs and given you your space also, I shouldn't have just left you alone instead of solving it properly by talking it out. We both had unfortunate days and I guess we both reached our breaking points. I was really hurt, Ruhn. You hurt me deeply, and for the past two weeks I had been thinking all of this over and I- I love you too, Ruhn. I forgive you. And I hope that next time, if such a thing happens, we will get to solve it in a better form."
Ruhn's eyes widened as a huge smile began overtaking his face. "So you will come back now?"
She smiled back at him. "Yes, I will come back now."
Ruhn eyes softened as he got up while still holding her palm to his face, causing y/n to also stand up.
He leaned in closer as his eyes wondered lovingly all over her face, as if taking in everything he missed in the past two weeks.
"That's really good to hear because I really want to kiss you now, my love."
Y/n giggled and said, "Then what are you waiting for?"
That was all he needed. Ruhn put one arm around her waist as he leaned his head down and kissed his mate, lovingly and gently, conveying the things he couldn't tell her with words.
All of a sudden, y/n felt something cold being slipped on to her fingers. When she pulled apart and looked down, she gasped in shock and awe at the beautiful ring on her finger.
At its center is a luminous, round-cut diamond, its facets expertly crafted to maximize brilliance and sparkle. The diamond is set in a delicate, platinum band that gently curves upward, accentuating the stone’s radiant glow. Surrounding the central diamond is a halo of smaller, perfectly matched gemstones, each reflecting light and enhancing the ring's celestial allure.
The band itself is adorned with intricate filigree work and tiny, pavé-set diamonds that catch the light from every angle. The design features a pattern reminiscent of a starry night sky, adding a touch of whimsy and romance.
Y/n's eyes welled up with tears as she looked back at her mate to see him also tearing up while holding her close by the waist.
"Remember the surprise I had mentioned? Yeah well, it was initially meant to be a bracelet but I thought it was better to turn those broken pieces into a ring instead. And....well, y/n, will you make me the happiest mate in the world by marrying me? Because I never want to experience this life without you right beside me ever again."
Y/n let a few of her tears slip as she smiled and nodded her head, quickly tugging Ruhn down by the collar of his shirt to kiss him.
"I would love nothing more than to experience life beside you, Ruhn."
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A/n: Well, I hope you guys enjoyed this! Thank you so much for reading<33
Tags: @mirandasidefics
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