#we completely forget that like

[colorisbyshe]

I am very sympathetic to any sort of like “I am feeling too mentally ill to be a good friend now” stuff. I really am. Canceled plans. Not replying to texts urgently. Even forgetting specific dates or whatever. Like, I’ve been there and I know I WILL be there in the future.

But I do recommend that if you are this person, frequently, that you really, really, really need to at least get to a space where you feel comfortable shooting off a a text (at some point, not even immediately) that’s just a brief “Hey, not feeling great/I’ve been super overwhelmed, and can’t respond much rn! Sorry!” or something to that effect. I know it doesn’t feel good but like... neither does having someone go suddenly silent on you.

Even when you know the silence isn’t your fault, it still hurts to send a good faith text or to try to follow up on “rescheduled” plans and get literally nothing in return. If you’re too embarrassed about feeling shitty again, lie and just say you’ve been super busy. ALmost anything is better than just completely bailing.

I do think there is a personal responsibility on both sides here. There is the responsibility to be sympathetic to the fact that sometimes life happens and life sucks but also... there is the responsibility to at least TRY to not leave someone hanging.

Idk.