#want to talk to the showrunners so badly

[sand-boxed]

echo is such a good character. theoretically at least. actually the definition of wasted potential hes the most interesting member of cf99 and hes barely in the show im sobbing.

i wish there was actual buildup to echo leaving or something showing his dissatisfaction with being in the batch. like something about having to kill his brothers, or even with the whole being sold as a droid thing which i know its a haha funny bit but that shit was actually so fucked up ???? we dont talk about that one enough that was so insane of hunter 😭😭 if u think abt his backstory then it makes more sense but theres barely anything in his behavior that suggests conflict with his own goals and the interests of his team by the time he leaves. ig its also one of the issues is that the show doesnt have enough time. maybe echo should have left later on in the show or something but i can also think of some midder episodes that are just hunter and omega but again that could have been replaced to give this guy or wrecker some actual characterization. no shade to them ( kinda bc most of the best episodes are the ones where theyre not there) but save some for the rest of us bc they dont need half the show do they

also istg they (writers and the batch ) forgot echo used to be a "reg" i feel like its so strange for the batch to be all pissy abt reg clones and have a weird superiority complex early on in the show when like. echo is there he was once one of them and now hes not. theres so much the writers could have done to tackle echos feelings abt being othered by the reg clones and inadvertently ostracized by his team. theres so much he probably sees different from thebatch bc of their separate upbringings where echo was part of a collective and the batch were singled out as individuals. does he view killing other clones in a different light bc he was also the type to follow orders blindly once??? how does he feel abt the chips as a pow that spent around a year unable to control his thoughts, having his mind stolen from him??

something i wanted for his character was for him to have a connection pre-citadel that he loses during his time being frozen bc he would have to cope with that loss and adapt to the batch at the same time. yes this is another excuse for me to talk abt fives but who else. echo doesnt talk to anyone except him in basically every scene b4 the citadel. echo feeling messed up abt it bc just all of a sudden his world has been turned upside down and all he can do is move on. thats absolutely terrifying to think about bc the war has taken away most of everyone hes ever known. there was no goodbye, nothing for him, they were just here one moment and gone the next for him. too bad we dont get to see any of it lmaoooo

[forgiveness-in-the-misery]

I glimpsed a post on reddit that made the claim that Murderface is incredibly under developed as a character and is basically Cartman from South Park and it is genuinely the dumbest take I have seen.

Especially when you consider the times Brendon talked about originally just making each character represent people you find in the metal scene or would see at a show and he was the guy who just stands around and bitches about everything….but then quickly realized that is super limiting and began exploring why this person is this way.

And the show does that. A lot.

His parents died, he was raised by grandparents who didn’t want custody of him but took him anyway, we know his grandma provided less than the bare minimum in terms of child care for him. We know he was consistently bullied at school and harassed and had nobody he could confide in or vent to.

We know it fucks him up that his parents died and the way they died and he won’t ever know why his dad did what he did other than his assumption it was because they rather die than look at him (i will die on the hill thag Stella told him that)

We know he’s insecure, we know rejection scares him so he just goes ahead and sets out to be rude and obnoxious and fail at things so that way he won’t be surprised when shit goes badly. We know he’s scared of being abandoned and with the finale we know he has been scared of becoming like Magnus.

A man who emotionally abused him enough to fully instill into him the idea that he is talentless and worthless, that they all are. He wanted to just run off and isolate away from his friends because of the things Salacia forced him to do, because he would rather die than hurt his friends. Because even before Salacia he knows that his negativity was all parroting of Magnus and emotionally abusing people he loves and he doesn’t want to be that person at all and never meant to become that person.

Like literally how can you claim this character is under developed and compare him to Cartman who is basically just a mouth piece at this point for the showrunners shitty opinions.

[aleemie]

It's absolutely soul-crushing how the industry treats animation so badly that we've gone from the industry standard season of animated television being 20-30 episodes long to 10-12 episodes long. Like think about how many episodes were in seasons of Adventure Time in 2011. And now think of how many episodes were in Hazbin Hotel. This post isn't specifically about Hazbin, but I watched that recently so it's what I'm going to talk about. Hazbin Hotel is 8 episodes long. That is so fucking depressing for many reasons. It signals to me that the industry standard for animation is only getting worse, people have waited almost a decade for this show to come out only to be disappointed with the almost painfully short run time. On top of that season 2 supposedly won't come out until 2027. Too many showrunners already have to work under this immense pressure nowadays to fit everything they want into a 12 episode season, which is already ludicrous to me, but an 8 episode season??? It feels like Amazon set the show up to fail. Watching the show, it felt like the writers panicked because they didn't know if they would be able to develop every character properly (which is to some degree on them as writers for not shortening the main cast or only focusing on 2 or 3 leads, but the stupid short number of episodes ordered did not help them) which leads to the entire show feeling way too fast paced and rushed. I hope we can get out of this rut, I'm excited to see where this show goes but the way it was handled leaves me feeling grim towards the state of cartoons as a whole.

[pepperf]

A good tragedy should be about a) inevitability, and b) what you are ultimately fighting is yourself. The reason TUA s4 failed so badly was that it felt extremely evitable, given their history, and what they were fighting was a combination of their sort-of stepmom and sort-of brother the Giant Blob. Like. That was not the inexorable hand of fate. That was weird city-eating goop set in motion by an arch-villain. Any half-decent superhero show would figure a way out of that.

And, sure, they might have made a tragic ending work for these characters, but they needed to show the inexorable steps that led them there from the start. Instead, all their past history shows us that they will make a terrible mess, they will try to fix it haphazardly, with everyone pulling in different directions, and end up creating a different mess instead, and none of them will ever cooperate with Five's plans.

Heck, they weren't even responsible for this one, it was their dad and stepmom's actions that brought it on. They were merely a side-effect. It's not their hubris - so it's not satisfying (in a tragic way) to see them be destroyed for it.

I get the aim of making a superhero show that has the superheroes be the problem in the end (tbh, this has been done a million times already, I don't know why SB thinks it's so clever), or having them sacrifice themselves heroically and no one knows - but like, it needs to feel earned, it needs to feel like the absolute last resort, that they've tried everything else and this is it, the only option. But they didn't try much else, here - even with all their enhanced powers, which had the potential to throw in some wildcards. No - they tried talking to and then hitting the Bennifer Blob, and then...blergh, we give up, let's all die and hope that fixes things. It was an unspectacular end, and it felt like such a waste of all that potential - of the show, the characters...

I know SB has said he planned this from the start, but it honestly didn't feel like it. Maybe he planned the general idea of them failing but never worked out the exact details, and when it came down to it, he didn't have a good apocalypse in mind? That certainly feels like his MO - lots of build-up, and then no follow-through. idk, whatever it was, it was just kind of a lame end to a show that I'd loved so much -and that was what really gets my goat. I wanted to feel like, whatever the ending, they'd thrown their hearts into it, and instead I was left feeling like the showrunners had already kind of moved on with their lives, it's only a TV show, just hit some popular beats, stick an ending on it, shove some CGI in, and hope the next thing we're pitching gets picked up. And it did feel very much like a showrunner issue, bc the actors did their absolute best to sell it. But there's only so much you can do with being eaten by a CGI blob.

We had three good seasons, and I am going to move on, once I've got some fic off my chest - but I'm just kinda disappointed that we didn't get one final season of great material, some stuff that makes me keep wanting to think about how it works, what happens next, how to explain X or Y - all that fun, fandom stuff.

Anyhow, much like Steve Blackman, I don't know how to end this. Peace out, y'all.

[a-lilac-lyric]

 Possible explanations for why King Roland made his first wish on the Wishing Well

Now all of these aren't so much theories per say as “throwing stuff on a wall and seeing what sticks” because the showrunners could not delve into topics like this in the actual runtime, and it probably wouldn't have been very relevant to the story that they were trying to tell anyway, so nearly every theory has an equal likelihood to be true more or less.

  (I'm also not going to mention this in my write ups for the possible reasons for the wish, and we have no way of proving this one way or the other, but I'm always inclined to prefer the thought that Roland II had discussed making the wish with Lorelei before he actually made it since it would be something that would affect both of them. Even if it only physically affected one of them. Because this just seems like the type of thing you should tell your partner about if you do it).

 This is a long post (Over 2000 words), so I'm putting it under the cut, but TLDR there are several different magical and physical reasons that are possible.

 General content warning for discussion of topics that are too dark/medical to ever be shown in a kids show. Spoilers for Forever Royal.

 We should first start off with what the wish was in the first place in case you don't know or need a refresher. Word for word, this is how it's stated in the flashback scene in the episode Forever Royal:

  “In the nearby castle lived King Roland the Second, who had wanted a family so badly he tried making a wish in a wishing well. The wish came true, and twins were born. But the Queen fell gravely ill….* The children were happy but never knew what it was like to have a mother.”

 * The quote never says that she is dead in so many words, but the visual on screen is of the queen arranged on a bed with her eyes closed, holding flowers. There's basically no other way to interpret it except that she's been laid out for a funeral.

 Now, as a note, we never actually get to hear what her name is in the show, but the creator of the show Craig Gerber made a Twitter post saying that her name was Lorelei https://x.com/CraigGerber_/status/1038831208430370817?mx=2 (as a personal note I normally consider stuff that show creators or writers say on Twitter or other social media as secondary Canon, but I basically completely accept this because we don't have any alternative name, and it works. And I'm sure that they'd use it in the sequel series if they ever talk about her.) So I'm going to be referring to her with that name for the rest of this post.

 When analyzing this quote, it seems that “wanted a family” basically means “wanted to have biological children” since we know he already has a wife and family members like a sister and a mom. I just think it's interesting that they word it this way because it kind of masks what his actual wording would have been to the wishing well. Because in the episode “When you wish upon a well” the well did grant Amber’s second wish in a way that fulfilled the basic criteria of her wish, and yet caused an unintended side effect that deeply distressed Amber and put Sofia in danger. So, it could possibly be that the way Roland wished for children could also be interpreted as accidentally directly causing Lorelei’s death. But we don't know what the words were, so we don't know if that was what happened or not. “Fell gravely ill” is a vague enough statement that it can basically be interpreted to fit any kind of theory.

 So without further ado, here are almost all of the ways I could think of that could be motivation for making the wish. (AKA infertility theories.)

Magical reasons:

 In this world, magic is an everyday fact of life, so they could have been unable to have kids because of a curse! Now it could be a curse on either Roland or Lorelei, and then the curse was just too strong to be broken by regular magic, but the Well’s magic was strong enough to get past it, (permanently or temporarily). The possible motives could be basically anything. It could have been cast by a jealous ex-lover, or a person who thought that the union was bad for political reasons.

 But I did come up with a fun little theory that maybe it was a curse that was intended to be benevolent, behold: The Double Bloodline Curse!

 We know that the throne of Enchancia passes from oldest child to oldest child, and the same seems to be true for the royal wizard as well. Both lines are hereditary, and both are always parallel to each other. It makes sure that the reigning monarch always has a royal wizard and vice versa. But it is interesting because Roland the First and Goodwin the Great are approximately the same age, same with both of their sons, and both of their granddaughters to an extent, although the age difference is seemingly larger between Amber and Calista.

 Now this could be just a coincidence that the people in these families born for 3 generations are very close in age, but what if it wasn't? What if there was some kind of spell or curse set on the people from both bloodlines so that they wouldn't be able to have children until their counterpart(s) was/(were) also in a position to be able to have children. Let's say that Roland the Second married and tried to have kids, but both Cedric and Cordelia were not married or seeing anyone and/or just neither of them were interested in having children at that time. Therefore, the curse activated to prevent Roland II from having any children.

 And this curse was probably put on the line by an actual royal wizard from it, assuming that it would be better off for both families and the sake of the kingdom if the new monarch and the new wizard were always peers age wise so that they could both ascend to their positions at the same time. Is that flawed reasoning and ultimately going to hurt their families more than help them in the long run? Absolutely! But it wouldn't be the craziest or worst thing that someone from either of these families has done.

 It's definitely possible for it to be magical reasons and would be interesting to explore in fanfic, but this isn't the only possibility.

Biological reasons that are linked to infertility:

 The first one is what if Lorelei was unable to biologically have children.

 It's popular fan-cannon (and I have seen it used in several fan fictions), that Lorelei was too physically weak for her body to/she had some kind of physical condition that meant she couldn't bear children. But the wish overrode that condition and after giving birth she was so weak that whatever possible illness/birth complications/regular pregnancy recovery happened afterwards she wasn't strong enough to survive it.

 In my opinion this one seems plausible, but I personally do not like it and do not think it makes sense for the characters. If she seemed medically unfit to give birth before the wish, then it would be ludicrously irresponsible for Roland II to make a wish for her to have the kids that didn't also strengthen her in a way that she could have them and survive. Additionally, I believe that if there was a lot of worry throughout the pregnancy that she might not be able to survive it, that Roland would have just made a second wish for her to be strong enough.

 Some may argue that it wouldn't have been possible to strengthen her enough to be able to survive giving birth, but may I point out that the wishing well has the ability to turn a regular human girl into a cat. Like literally change your species. Strengthening someone enough so that they can survive a pregnancy seems pretty minor compared to turning someone into a cat.

 And Roland is normally pretty good at noticing when people he loves are in distress, he'll stop what he's doing and talk with them and try to make the situation better. Now if Lorelei was hiding her physical symptoms from everyone for whatever reason, it could be possible to do that with others especially servants who she didn't spend much time with, but considering how much time Roland spends with Miranda he probably spent the same amount of time with his first wife. If they were in close proximity to each other that often for months on end he would notice if something was wrong and ask her about it and try to solve the problem. Therefore, I personally don't subscribe to it in my own headcanons.

 Another interpretation of this is that Lorelei was the one who is unable to have children, but it was because of some type of condition that was not due to weakness but another type of biological factor(s). The wish allowed her to have the kids, but then she died because the Well directly took her life as a price for the wish/because of how the wish was worded. Or she just happened to get unlucky and die from one of the several medical reasons that a person can die from giving birth no matter their physical strength. It's pretty similar to the first one but I am much more inclined towards it.

 But what if Roland was the one who was biologically unable to have children?

 This one doesn't seem to be explored in any fan fictions I've seen but I think this one is interesting to consider as well. I think most people's reasoning is that if Lorelei died from the wish, then the wish must have just physically affected her and therefore cause [wish] equals effect [death], but if it was going to take her life as a price/consequence for the wish anyway, it may not have necessarily needed to have affected her physically at all. Or the Well never took her life at all, she just got really unlucky and died from random chance. And there's plenty of medical reasons that men can be unable to have children. We don't know what kind of medical knowledge they have in Enchancia, but it may not have been advanced enough to find a solution for Roland or even know that he was the one who was infertile.

 He could have caught an illness as a child that had adult infertility as a side effect (angst potential. If he was also isolated for a long period of time away from other kids this could also partially explain why he became estranged from Cedric). Or it could be a genetic reason, like being intersex (I say as I read that one of the most common noticeable effects of Klinefelter syndrome is being tall. And it would fulfill a certain letter for possible LGBTQIA+ headcannons). Or he could have been severely overworking and under eating (there are a few times in the show where he does this, albeit not to a self-destructive extent, and that’s after he’s had kids and been king for years, also angst potential).

 If this was true, then it could also be possible that he was only temporarily able to have kids depending on how the wish worked. Or depending on the wording of the wish he might only be able the have kids with Lorelei exclusively. So if he and Miranda wanted to make a kid together, they might not be able to (more angst), unless another wish was made (but I doubt he would risk it).

 And a really dark possibility for Roland being infertile is that maybe the wish did NOT make him fertile but instead had a, what I am going to describe as a “love potion” effect on Lorelei and she got pregnant from someone who was not Roland. Now I think that this possibility is really horrifying for a number of reasons, but I've never seen it used in a fanfiction before and I'm not sure if anyone else has ever thought of it, but it exists now. I say that Amber and James do look like Roland, but I would also say that they definitely look more like Lorelei than him, so if you wanted to do a horrifying big drama fanfic this is a possibility for that.

Biological/other reasons that are not infertility:

 But what if their trouble with having children wasn't linked to infertility?

 There is the possibility that Royal Prep/other schools they had gone to had such a terrible sex education class that neither of them knew how to get pregnant and at this point were too afraid to ask. So they wished for it instead. I think this one only works if you're going for an adult humor fanfiction because, this just seems really unlikely to me. Even if they hadn't been educated in school, they would probably still ask someone or have been told by someone or have read it in a book by this point. Especially since part of their job as ruling monarchs is to produce heirs, I'm sure someone in the court would have explained it to them if they didn't know.

 Another slightly more reasonable but still unlikely reason is that maybe one or both of them was asexual. So they needed another way to start the pregnancy and decided magic was a good way to do it. I feel like if this was true then they could have just solved this by going to an actual wizard or doctor and getting help from them, so I don't think this is very likely but I'm trying to go through all the possibilities here.

 But on a far more serious note there as been a possibility I've been thinking about lately that does seem likely considering how often it happens in real life. It could be possible that Roland and Lorelei had already tried to have children, and she was able to get pregnant, but it ended in a miscarriage or a stillbirth. Maybe she was already pregnant by the time Roland made the wish, and he wished that this time it would be a successful pregnancy. The way he looks in the flashback makes it seem like Roland is really sad and kind of desperate about the whole situation and if this possibility was true, then it adds an extra layer of sadness to the whole ordeal.

 ****Also, this isn't attached to any single theory but I wanted to add this: I think that whether the wish caused Lorelei’s death or she died from completely natural causes, it must have happened fairly quickly. If the illness that she got after giving birth lasted a long time, then wouldn't there have been enough time for Roland to have made another wish to save her? Meanwhile if it happened very quickly or without much warning then he may not have had enough time to save her. If it happened quickly, it would also mean that there was less of a chance for the doctors or midwives or sorcerers to do anything to save her.

 *****And regardless of whether it actually was the magic of the wish that killed her or it was from the same causes that any non magical birth can suffer from, I think Roland believes that it was his fault that Lorelei died. He probably doesn't know for sure whether it was the wish that did it or not, but that wouldn't matter if he felt like it was his fault. His exact words to Amber about it were: “My wish didn't turn out so well either.” But we know that he loves Amber and James, and he's very proud of them, so the quote isn't about being a father to them or their existence. So the only other possibility for him saying that it didn't turn out well is what happened to Lorelei.

On that note, those are all the reasons I could think of. Feel to say in the reblogs or comments which one you think is most likely and/or which one is your favorite. Here's a cookie for getting to the end of this post 🍪

[minnaci]

okay. whipped out my laptop again for apology tour. same disclaimers apply: i'm not a hellaverse blog (or, if i am, i'm very much in denial about it), i enjoy the show and the characters, and my opinions are informed by my personal lived experiences. apology tour spoilers ahead.

i've done a lot of scrolling through comments and posts since watching apology tour and, while many good points were made, i'm not sure that any of them sufficiently sum up how conflicted i feel about this episode. i'll try to hopefully stumble my way into a coherent analysis.

full warning, it will be blitz-centric, but there is enough nuance in my heart to be sympathetic to stolas, too. both of them fucked up! i just happen to identify more strongly with blitz.

tldr: the showrunners said it best. stolas is not quite as self-aware as he should be, and blitz... is blitz. cw for spoilers and discussions of american racism (particularly antiblackness) and classism.

this crux of the issue in apology tour continues to be miscommunication, which is heavily influenced by 1. both blitz's and stolas's pasts and 2. the sociopolitical context in which they operate.

1 . STOLAS

stolas was a victim of emotional neglect in his childhood, and then a victim of his emotionally abusive wife in his adulthood. he, as he so aptly implies in apology tour, has never truly felt wanted beyond what he could provide to his family. one of the only times we have ever seen stolas happy was at the circus as a child, where he developed a fleeting, parasocial admiration for blitz.

in this way, stolas is painfully, achingly relatable. while he grew up in a disgusting amount of material wealth, he has been deprived of the one thing you cannot buy with money: unconditional love. he yearns for the type of romance he reads about, the type of passionate desire that he watches in his telenovelas, and when blitz comes along— the one, shining memory in stolas's otherwise dull childhood— stolas falls into the fantasy.

and that's exactly what it is. in the beginning, stolas doesn't really want blitz. he wants what blitz represents— a charming, seductive figure to ravish him, to hold him close, to show him that he is desirable and make him feel wanted. it's a fantasy at the price of the key to stolas's job— a fantasy that is, from an outsider's perspective, easily explained by racial fetishization. more on this later.

to stolas, it's a small price to pay. the grimoire, a token piece of power to the goetias, in exchange for the one thing that stolas has always wanted? sign stolas up! stolas has never had to worry about his livelihood, nor his safety— not in any way that matters. not in any way that blitz would have had to.

stolas is ignorant. he is naive and unaware of how the world works. this remains true when he falls for blitz, when he plans to "set them free" (a la "when i see him"), even after he confesses and his fairy-tale fantasies come crashing down around him. he is not in a place where he can comprehend the effects of class on his relationships because it is not something he has ever had to consider before.

all that said, none of that invalidates the way that stolas feels when blitz explodes at him in full moon. stolas setting his boundaries at the beginning of apology tour ("i feel uncomfortable when you talk to me that way") is valid. it's actually an example of communication gone right in this episode, in that stolas explicitly communicates how blitz's actions make him feel.

his resultant upset when blitz keeps pushing him and antagonizing him is similarly valid. his decision to go to verosika's party is valid. my main point here is: while i don't particularly enjoy stolas's actions in full moon or even in apology tour, i can empathize with wanting to be wanted by someone so badly that it basically ruins your life.

again, stolas is ignorant. he lacks self awareness. he is emotionally immature and lacks empathy. but the message here isn't "rich people can't feel heartbreak", at least for me. the message is "even though he is hurt, stolas needs to understand that his actions have consequences, and that blitz experiences relationships (and the world) in a fundamentally different way than stolas as a product of the differences in socioeconomic contexts in which they were raised."

2. BLITZ

oh, blitz. where to start? this is where i admit that there are a lot of similarities between the way blitz and i grew up, and a lot of similarities in the ways that we view relationships now (read: i may project a bit. apologies in advance).

from when he was young, blitz has learned that the only successful type of love is love that is transactional. he loved his mother, and she died in a fire he started. he loved fizz and barbie, and he ruined their lives. the only "successful" love he has experienced is love where he provides something (read: gets "used") and receives something in return. so, unless he can provide something of value to his partner, blitz prefers to keep it casual. in blitz's mind, people don't care about blitz, and people shouldn't care about blitz. loving blitz has always been a recipe for disaster, because in his perspective, if he can't provide something to his lover that offsets the destruction that he causes, then he's not worth it.

it's normal for blitz to feel used. it's normal for blitz to feel less-than, or unwanted, or unloved, and it hurts blitz less to believe that. sex is fun. he can "do sex", and he can do sex good, and maybe to him, that's all that he can do good. he certainly can't hold down a relationship. his employees only care about him because he provides a stable source of income. his daughter only cares about him because he gives her shelter. it's normal. blitz feeling hated is normal, and the normalcy brings him so much comfort that he purposefully pushes people away to maintain that awful, vicious cycle of a status quo. it's a self-fulfulling prophecy.

blitz's approach to stolas in the beginning of apology tour is his desperate bid to return to normal. stolas being so short and angry with him is almost comforting— blitz knows how anger feels. he knows how hate feels. stolas is just another person who finally, finally realized what blitz knew all along— love is something that isn't possible for blitz, because he always fucks it up (at least in his perspective). and if stolas lets blitz fuck him, lets blitz provide this service to him, then maybe, blitz can "earn his way to earth" (read: "earn" stolas's affection back). affection, to blitz, is something for him to work tirelessly and endlessly to receive— a sisyphean affair. he is not ever intended to actually receive it.

stolas doesn't recognize this. stolas doesn't even try. but in stolas's defense, blitz doesn't exactly make it easy. i may empathize with blitz, but i think i would also be a little less prone to empathy if the object of my affections mocked my feelings by brushing them off in favor of sex and then screaming "GAY" in my face when i refused.

the rest of blitz's apology tour is borne out of pettiness towards stolas, because in his eyes, stolas is the one who wronged him. stolas was the one who accepted the rules of engagement with blitz (i.e., a transactional relationship: the grimoire for a bit of fun, kinky sex). stolas is the one who has all the power. stolas is the one who can choose to ruin blitz. stolas is the one who ruined the good thing they had going.

except... blitz doesn't really believe that. deep down, subconsciously, blitz knows he loves stolas, and by being in love, he's done to stolas what he did to his mother, to fizz, to barbie: ruined his life. maybe, if blitz could seduce stolas and make their relationship transactional again, he could correct their course and save stolas the pain of believing that blitz is deserving of love. it's a trolley problem: pull the lever, and blitz is the only one who gets hurt. let the trolley continue, and stolas will inevitably get caught in the crossfire of loving blitz.

blitz can handle a little pain. he handled it when his mother died. he handled it when fizz hated him. he handled it when barbie left him. he handles it over and over again, being used as tool for sexual pleasure or physical violence. he earns his pain, just as he feels he must "earn" the grimoire. just as he feels he must "earn" the little tokens of stolas's affection.

as an aside: the grimoire is more than a symbol of blitz's livelihood. it's a physical representation of the stark difference in class between blitz and stolas, as well as a representation of the transactional nature of all of blitz's relationships, not just the one between him and stolas. it is one magical book among thousands that the goetias own— a veritable drop in the bucket of the immense power, wealth, and influence that the goetias, and by extension, stolas, wield. that same book which is inconsequential to stolas and the goetias is everything to blitz. without the grimoire, he loses his job and everything that comes with it, including (in blitz's transactional view of relationships) millie, moxxie, and even loona's companionship. but i digress.

it's been said before that there is nobody who belongs at the blitz hate party more than blitz himself, and it's true— there is nobody in hell who could hate blitz more than he hates himself. because as much as he might present himself as a little dumb, he's anything but. he knows what he's doing will destroy him. he knows if he continues to do what he's doing, he'll "die alone", which, in some ways, is what he fears more than anything. he even tells verosika that he "doesn't want to be like this forever", but he can't seem to stop himself. he doesn't know how to stop himself.

after all, he's right. everyone hates him. it's evident in the party they've thrown for him. and the worst part thing is: it's his fault, and he knows it. he knows he's hurt all of these people, and even though he plays at callousness, he can't quite hide his hurt that stolas in particular won't hear him out. he can't hide his hurt that stolas can't seem to understand where blitz is coming from. because blitz does try to talk to stolas in apology tour. he tries to tell stolas what he's feeling, and how he regrets how he's spoken to stolas, but stolas is too drunk and too upset to care (which, btw, not blaming stolas for that. if i were a drinker, i'd be right there beside him).

stolas, in this moment, focuses entirely on himself and the pain that blitz put him through (again, not blaming stolas for that), but it tells blitz that stolas really, really does not care about him anymore, if he ever did. and wasn't that what blitz wanted? isn't that what blitz deserves? so it's easy to let a bigger, taller, more handsome, more suave imp sweep stolas off his feet and out of blitz's life. the imp is, by his t-shirt's estimation, "better than blitzo", after all. and don't they say that to love someone is to let them go?

verosika's advice to blitz only cements this. stolas is moving on. stolas deserves better. and blitz? all blitz deserves is to be used, so can he really be mad that some better imp is giving stolas what blitz never could? and again, blitz has dealt with the people he loves hating him before. his father sold him for $5. his best friend hated him for years. his sister still does. at least with stolas, he got the asmodean crystal out of it, and he won't lose the only semblance of companionship he has left.

3 - SOCIOECONOMIC CONTEXT

i saw a post that said that fans are focusing too much on the class difference between stolas and blitz, and i couldn't disagree more. in fact, i'd say that we are not focusing enough on the class difference between stolas and blitz.

all of stolas's ignorance is magnified tenfold by his lack of understanding of how their class and race difference colors their relationship. all of blitz's self-hatred and self-worth issues are exacerbated one-hundredfold by these same class and race differences.

classism and racism go hand in hand, especially in america. in helluva boss (and especially in the beginning of the stolitz dynamic), there is an implication of racial fetishization. blitz, the "lower-class" poor imp, fulfills stolas (an "upper-class" wealthy elite)'s fantasies of being "ravaged" and "taken" in his own home. stolas canonically enjoys the rough treatment, enjoys the taboo feeling of having blitz fuck him. it's very evocative of how some white american women fetishize and fantasize about black men— a fetish that has its roots in white supremacy (and especially the enslavement and ongoing oppression of black people in america.)

that said, in the context of helluva boss, it is very clear that blitz is aware of his socioeconomic standing the implications thereof— more aware than even stolas, who has ostensibly been educated on the social and economic nuances of the realm he helps to rule. he tries to tell stolas about how this difference in class affects him and amplifies his already awful self-worth ("you're a prince. it's hard to believe you would want me. that anyone would want me"), but stolas is incapable of hearing him.

all this to say, blitz is not solely to blame for their current relationship. that isn't to say that blitz is blameless. in fact, blitz isn't the most emotionally mature either— most of what i have written about him are things that i doubt he consciously realizes about himself. but stolas's ignorance and lack of willingness to consider where blitz is coming from, both emotionally and socioeconomically, make up a huge part of why stolitz continues to miscommunicate.

anyways. yeah. viv was right. things sure did happen.

[chaifootsteps]

I don't think anyone making the 'it's wrong to argue the show abandoned its premise' argument has really engaged with what the problem here actually is

there's often this bad faith painting of everyone with the same brush that they're just complaining because they thought they were being promised one thing and got another and that's their only problem.

besides the fact it's not exactly wrong if you thought you were getting steak only to be disappointed when the show served up slurry instead, it's ignoring the bigger problem.

the premise of the show is supposed to drive the story and without that frame, a lot of stories lose focus. and hb is very much one of those stories. We have a story where the writers are increasingly disinterested in the emotional state of their own main character, and as far as the Stolas plotlines go...oh boy.

So Stella had moved out by Ozzie's yet we're now approaching ten episodes later and the divorce is still not finalized, who knows what's even going on with that at this point. Doubtless it will form the backbone of s3 if they make it because that and stol!tz are the only things the show has left going for it.

And that means the writers have to drag out both plotpoints as long as possible because nothing else matters at this point. If what they're going for now is drama and not comedy I would like to point out most prestige drama has multiple plotlines with its ensemble cast. HB has set up plenty of avenues for that and done nothing with most of them. They have no road that would feel natural to develop because they've left themselves no options.

Also - and it probably goes without saying but I'll say it anyway - 'will a character divorce his evil wife' and 'will that same character successfully bully his love interest into being his idea of the perfect partner' are not good driving questions for long form drama. We know Stolas is definitely going to leave Stella so there's little dramatic tension outside of her trying to get petty revenge, which is dumb since Stolas has the god powers to just body her if he wanted to. And the second one assumes the audience is invested in the will they won't they of Stol!tz - and given how unlikeable Stolas has become more fans are getting turned off from ever caring if they will (and the showrunners already spoiled the ending on that, so extra who cares?)

it's the exact same logic people use to dismiss anyone saying 'X character is badly written' when they snidely respond 'you're just sad your headcanon the show never said it was going to give didn't come true'. It's a neat little trick to avoid why critics hate how Stolas, Stella, Millie etc. are written (or underwritten)

Well said. But then, "bad faith painting" is nothing new to the crowd of people we're talking about. I think they actually know full well what the problem critics have is, but resorting to strawmen arguments is all they've got.

[dotthings]

The denialism and revisionist history going on pushing the fairy tale that Nexstar CW is the only CW era with problems that required calling out, and the invalidation towards any criticism of the pre-Nexstar eras, have gone completely off the rails.

Perpetuating these fairy tales and the erasure of CW Network's long-running history of issues helps enable the broken system people claim they care about denouncing.

The reality of CW Network history: Racism, homophobia, poor set practices, toxic abusive showrunners, systemic failure to support actors especially in marginalized groups, and fan base after fan base used for engagement and then treated badly.

These are systemic industry issues, not confined to any one network. CW became a lightning rod for it because it was unusually concentrated from one platform, so it stuck out and CW earned a terrible reputation, long before the sale.

To combat the revisionist history and denialism, behind the cut is a timeline with a few of the egregoius systemic problems that have plagued the CW historically and reflect severe enabling and lack of oversight on the part of the network.

Nexstar Media era acquired the CW on October 3, 2022.

The harm starts at the very beginning, though. On January 24, 2006, The CW was born. In its founding, The CW destroyed an entire slate of Black-led series on UPN and the resulting network was extremely white.

Candice Patton, in EW, reflecting on the early seasons of The Flash and how she had to speak up and advocate for herself and for Iris West (date of article May 23, 2023, but refers to pre-Nexstar CW) “The scariest thing is speaking up, and I had a hard time talking about it for such a long time because you're so afraid of being seen as problematic," she says. "That's a word that no actor wants to have follow them around. But I think we're learning that speaking up and speaking out is the only way for change. And it's not about blaming people or canceling people, it's about just really being able to have a conversation so that the industry changes for the better. And I hope that whatever struggles I may have had, doing that has made it even the smallest amount easier for the next crop of actors coming up who feel like they need to be heard and seen and accommodated for."

July 8, 2022, EW. Candice Patton reveals how she considered quitting The Flash in S2 due to racist fans and The CW and WB didn’t give her the support she needed, and reflects on how she was treated differently than her co-stars:

"Even with the companies I was working with, The CW and WB, that was their way of handling it. We know better now that it's not okay to treat your talent that way, and to let them go through this abuse and harassment. But for me in 2014, there were no support systems. No one was looking out for that. It was just free range to get abused every single day. There were no social media protocols in place to protect me, so they just let all that stuff sit there….It's just not enough to make me your lead female and say, 'Look at us, we're so progressive, we checked the box.' It's great, but you've put me in the ocean alone around sharks. It's great to be in the ocean, but I can get eaten alive out here…It was more about the protocols in place and the things I see happening for my white counterparts that's not happening to me. Seeing how I was treated differently than other people, seeing how I'm not protected by the network and the studio, those were the things that not necessarily hurt me but frustrated me."

January 28, 2022, Sunstroke Magazine - Looking Back On Kat Graham's Racist and Anti-Semitic Experience on 'The Vampire Diaries’ A summary: * Kat Graham endured racist and antisemitic comments from a co-worker. * The show forced her to wear a wig when she recommended using her natural hair for Bonnie * Ian Somerhalder had to step up to protect Kat, threatening to quit the show if Bonnie was killed off or written out * Showrunners shot down the idea of Bonnie being queer and was patronizing to Bonnie fans * Here’s a compilation of Kat Graham and her character Bonnie being mistreated during the run of TVD:

October 2021, EW and THR - Ruby Rose accuses CW and WBTV of bad set practices and that they were forced to keep filming 10 days after major surgery she had to undergo after being injured doing a stunt and called out bad practices that harmed crew and endangered everyone on set. CW and WBTV denied everything

June 7, 2021, Hypebae, Candice Patton speaking on issues concerning how PoC are treated at CW and systemically in the TV industry

November 22, 2020, Popsugar - The all-black cast of the superhero series Black Lightning have to find out from social media that the show is cancelled and are given no advance warning. China Anne McClain reveals she was going to quit the show even if it had continued: “For different reasons, that, to be honest, I don't want to go into. I just want y'all to trust me on it."

November 9, 2020, Slashfilm - 'Superman & Lois' Writer Nadria Tucker Says She Was Fired After Raising Issues With CW Show's Sexism And Racism

San Diego Comic Con 2017: the cast of Supergirl singing a song to mock a predominantly queer fanbase for the Supercorp ship

March 14, 2016, Variety - “What TV Can Learn From ‘The 100’ Mess” in the wake of The 100 killing off Lexa, an openly queer character.

April 6, 2016, EW - The 100: Ricky Whittle says showrunner 'abused' him off the show May 6, 2015 - Season 10, episode 21 of SPN "Dark Dynasty" airs, killing the show's only recurring openly queer character at that point, Charlie Bradbury.

It’s common knowledge Daman Salvatore is bi in The Vampire Diaries books. The character on the show, one of “classic CW”’s biggest hits, was straightwashed.

2013: Misha Collins at NJ Con comments on how women are treated on SPN:

2024: Misha Collins at Purcon 8 shades the CW for placing representation caps on queer rep at SPN

The fact CW had other queer rep does not preclude the existence of pinkwashing, queer erasure, or queer censorship)

November 2020: in the wake of Castiel's romantic love confession to Dean Winchester and in the immediate aftermath of the end of SPN, the nature of the confession was ommitted in all official promotional material and Misha Collins hinted he was told he couldn't talk about Cas's pov. Eventually, Misha Collins was able to speak openly that the writer intention and the story and everyone who worked on the scene intended it as a romantic love confession and that Cas is queer and in love with Dean.

---

Love the shows. Support the shows. Support the creatives who were trying to make things better from within the system.

The megacorporation does not love you.

Stop bootlicking for the megacorporation.

[sukibenders]

I really enjoy Yellowjackets but the way it throws its poc characters to the side, the way the fandom does is so unsurprising but saddening at the same time. Shauna is one of my favorite characters, she's cool and stuff but, being honest, the trope of housewife having an affair because she's bored of her current life has been played before. So what if this one had certain elements outside of it, it's still common so it kind of grew tiring to see Yellowjackets constantly shove this plot at me when Tai's storyline is right there.

Taissa, a biracial woman who, even after living through something horrific as a kid, "bounced back" and lived the life she always wanted. She was a lawyer, now ran for and won a position in office, married a beautiful and smart woman and had a son, has a whole perfect family who she loves. Only for the trauma, the aspect of her life she promised herself and others to never talk about, is now coming back and in the process causes her to do things she doesn't want to do. The plot that could have come from Taissa alone is out of this world. You mean to tell me that a biracial lesbain running for office wouldn't be more entertaining than Shauna's storyline? Why couldn't Tai be the main focus?

And I don't even want to get into the fandom, but I have too. Listen, I like TaiVan for all that they are. They helped each other survive during a time where they thought it would be impossible. But what annoys me and, sadly, almost pushed me away from this ship, was how the writers and fans treat Simone and Sammy. Like the shows only way to have Tai together with Van was to put her wife in a coma and abandoned her son? That really does not sound like Tai, who fought to get her old life. And very insidious how some fans make certain jokes that just reek of "Let's push away the black characters to make room for the yte ones", because I've seen people call Simone the villain, to other things, just because she told Tai to get help all while framing Van as the better option. I've seen people in the fan call Sammy unnatural or even a demon just because he exists in a way that is not natural, by that I mean acting out and expressing coping mannerisms because he saw a version of his mother who terrified him but can't express, but I forgot because he's a little black boy who needs help people will ignore him or dehumanize him, because that's how this works right? The shows main, and only dark-skinned black characters were quickly pushed aside by the plot for what?

And I have a feeling the show may make us watch Taissa go through great lengths to keep Van alive (even though I do want Van to live), but won't extend the same want to Simone, which will read badly with the undertones in so many ways.

And the fandom treats Tai poorly as well (don't even get me started on some pretending to care about her family just to hang it over her head and call her a deadbeat) and reaching some nearly very ableist thinking when talking about her. Taissa deserved so much better, from the show and the fandom, and I hope they do better in season three but I'm not so sure to be honest, because most of the scenes even having mentions of Tai's blackness were because of Jasmine, not the showrunners, who it would be fine if it were small things here and there but to add so many crucial parts to your character because others won't begins to become a pattern.

[drakaripykiros130ac]

I’m sorry to blow up your asks, but I wanted your opinion since I know you don’t like HOTD’s adaption of F&B.

What do you think about the way they handled Laena’s death? I’ve seen people argue that they prefer the book and the shows versions for different reasons. For me, it was one of the changes in the show that I actually liked over the original.

They not only showed the difference in Daemon and Viserys’ character with the way Daemon refused the c-section after learning Laena wouldn’t survive it vs Viserys saying to do it, but we also got to see Laena die on her own terms (as much as she could given the circumstances). She asked Viserys about Vhagar as a child and eventually bonded with the dragon she yearned for, and I find it bittersweet that she was able to go out in her own terms by the dragon she wanted so badly. Not to mention the symbolism in it; she knew she would be buried at sea like a Velaryon, but she was also able to have a dragonrider’s death with Vhagar like a Targaryen.

(Disclaimer: I am talking strictly about her death. I could write an entire doctoral thesis about the way they slaughtered Daemon and Laena’s relationship and the relationship they had with Rhaenyra, and Daemon’s character as a father to his children.)

I personally greatly dislike how they had Viserys make that decision for Aemma. It wasn’t like that in the book. Aemma Arryn died in childbirth period. Viserys had nothing to do with it.

As a side note, the showrunners have made plenty of decisions to make Viserys and Daemon look bad through the way they treat women (it wasn’t like that in the book).

As for Laena’s death, while the show version is definitely more epic, I think that it was executed poorly. I mean, Laena, while giving birth, barely able to move and in tremendous amount of pain, manages to move past all those people in the room and get to Vhagar? There’s seriously no one who saw her leave? And how could she just leave? Normally, she shouldn’t have been able to move.

Overall, the showrunners choose epicness over good sense.

[ikamigami]

I have my own reasons called personal experiences to not believe Sun that he's mental state was great till Eclipse's return..

I call bullshit when I see it lol

Sun is just like me fr fr nah he's better actually

Also I want for Sun's suicide plot to happen because it would be so cathartic to me

Ofc I'm not saying that I want Sun to succeed, no..

The best scenario would be Sun trying to kill himself or harming himself badly and someone sees that and stops him from doing more damage to himself or from killing himself

Or scenario where someone finds out about Sun being suicidal while talking to him is also a good one

But if showrunners go for Sun attempting suicide - like I said in this post - I'm all for it.. Sun doesn't have to even die, he can end up being in a coma or just being severely damaged or have a near death experience

But I want for this plot to happen.. I need this to happen..

If you don't understand what I'm saying then.. that's great ✨ I mean it.. Go, be yourself and enjoy your life <3

[rewatching-sam-and-dean]

The Schrödinger's SPN Revival

So, recently there’s been a lot of talk on here and twitter because a couple articles have been published citing Jared and Jensen (or just Jensen in one POS article) mentioning discussing possibilities for a revival. Does this make it any more likely to happen or closer to being realized? I don’t know, but the guys have been mentioning it off and on for years already, so I’m not sure it’s any more likely now than it ever was. Also, with networks and the whole industry in seeming disarray, even if J2 want to get a revival going, I’m not sure it will happen.

But, let’s speculate anyway. Shall we?

(I CANOT get the link to work for some reason!!)

My thoughts on this, under the cut.

I’m no authority on anything in the TV industry, but I have watched our little show a lot, so I have thoughts. Let’s take look at each person on this poll.

Kripke - Obviously, he understands Sam and Dean. He created them after all. But, would I trust him with the revival? Well, judging by The Boys, he seems more focused on shock value than tight storytelling these days, so I’m not sure I would want to see an SPN on a streamer that he ran. It might become a case of all fireworks and little to no heart. Also, if he had ended the series in Season 5, both Sam and Dean would have been trapped in the cage forever. Not exactly a happy ending. Still, is he capable of manning a revival snd doing a decent job? Yes. Would I totally trust him with it? Maybe. Maybe not. Do I think he even has time to do it? Not really.

Jensen - Come on, people! If you want him to reprise his role as Dean, then he isn’t going to be the showrunner. Also, he’s an actor, not a writer, so it’s not even in his wheelhouse. So, no. This wouldn’t be a good idea. And after The Winchesters, I think it’s extremely unlikely that he’d be put at the helm in this way. The only upside to Jensen being a show runner? We know damn well Destiel would be ignored as vigorously as it deserves.

Robbie Thompson - Exhibit One: The Winchesters. So, no. Also, while he has written some episodes that I like of SPN, he was always trying to make the show something it wasn’t, whether it was Fairytale time with Charlie or trying to shoehorn romance into a platonic brother love story, he’s shown that he shouldn’t be trusted with the OG show in a position of power.

Sera Gamble - Season 6 while having some absolute bangers, was also a bit of a mess in some ways. And Season 7 was more so. How much of this was due to Gamble hersel and how much was due to Singer tugging at the reins, I don’t know. She is a proven showrunner, so I believe she could do it. She actually understands and enjoys Sam, so that would be a huge relief for those of us who actually care about Sam and want to see him get his due on screen. Also, she has never written Dean badly from my observations, despite certain past claims by “some people” on women not writing male dialogue well. In a lot of ways, I think she could be a good choice. But, would she be interested even? I have no clue.

Andrew Dabb - NEXT!!

Jeremy Carver - For reasons relating to Season 11, I would like to see him helm a revival. He can clearly follow through with a connected and coherent arc. However, for reasons relating to Season 8, where he had characters do a few hugely out of character things for the story’s sake? No. For Season 10 snd the bore thst it was for me personally (though that potentially had something to do with pressure that came from Singer)? No. All in all. I think he’d be capable of ruining a revival, but something tells me he isn’t particularly interested and they guys may not be that ready to chose him, either (purely just my gut).

Robert Singer - No. I believe he interfered with Gamble and Carver’s plans; I just don’t know to what extent. And worst of all, he did nothing to help steer Dabb away from the mess that was much of Seasons 12 to 15. Also, he’d probably bring Buck-Lemming with him. And can I just say a big, “Fuck no,” to that.

Again, all of this is just me rambling. I have no real idea how likely any of them would be to come back for a revival. And I also don’t know how much J2 would want any of them to run a revival, or whether they’d want to just get someone new who might be more likely to listen to their ideas. I don’t even know if J2 would have an easy time agreeing on who would make a good show runner from that list because I think they might not even agree on who they considered to be better writers, or be better candidates to showrunner. For example, I think Jared might be more enthusiastic about Gamble than Jensen would. And Jensen would probably welcome Singer more than Jared would. Again, I don’t know any of this for certain, but it just my impression based off of things they’ve said over the years.

If a revival happens what do I want?

First, it sounds to me like if there is one, J2 want to be a big part of it with Sam and Dean as central focus. This is what I would want. I watched the show for them. I stuck it out through the rough seasons for them. The only way I would watch a revival was if it heavily featured both Sam and Dean. Second, I think I would enjoy if they did a revival during the years (according to J2) between Episodes 19 snd 20. I would like this because it would make the likelihood of angel or demon interference minimal. And this would be the more likely scenario for us to get a more old-school creature hunting revival. We could still see Jody and co for those who care about that. There would be no need for Cas or Jack to show up, which I would prefer. Yet, it would be easy enough for them to make a brief appearance if J2 wanted to pander in that way. Also, I’m so very sick of Angel BS, and this seems like the best way to avoid it. Third, I could be interested in a bit of a prequel with John and the boys, if they could find a way to include J2 without making it convoluted and pointless. Finally, if they come back from heaven for some reason, I think it would be hard for the revival to have much in the way of stakes. And I really wouldn’t want a huge dose of Cas, which we’d potentially have in that case.

Anyway, here are my thoughts on the potential revival, thoughts thst no one asked for admittedly. Lol.

If anyone read this far, what are your thoughts on a revival. If it happens, who should run it and what would you want to see happen?

[that-left-turn]

The richonne fans actually have lead the discussion on racism in the fandom and we pretend we don’t see it or reply with snark because we don’t really care. I am a vocal caryler on twitter who speaks against it and if you were there you would see that. We get drowned out by the others. There’s not a lot of us who speak against it over there. But it’s easier to ignore it to whine about not getting canon from simple gimple and Zabel. I found you because of your fic. That’s where I get my fix because we will never get it from those men. But that doesn’t mean the bad behavior in our fandom should be ignored. Sad.

I have no idea what Richonne fans do or not, apart from the people in my asks who tell me to stfu and add colorful insults to make their point. Educating people on why something is hurtful and how institutionalized prejudice works is a good thing. Calling each other names, not so much. Most people aren't taught about racism in school, just that "racism=bad" which isn't all that helpful in itself. That said, I don't think it's a competition between taking a stand against racism or misogyny. They go hand in hand more often than not and I'm capable of being angry about both injustices at once. I do "whine" about both things.

It's a mistake to think of Gimple as "simple." He's not a competent showrunner or studio exec, his writing is bad and he's an unpleasant person, but he's shrewd. He's been molding the franchise into reflecting his personal preferences for years, to the detriment of the shows and those who've worked on them. He has certain criteria for the people he hires and the ones who've predated his power of influence, he's done his best to shove out.

Getting canon is important. It's representation for middle-aged relationships which we get precious little of on TV. The 'older' couples we see are mostly supporting cast, there to be a foil for the problems the protagonist has; they're not the focal point of the show. Caryl are from a poor white background (Carol's grandma made her clothes and Daryl grew up in a shack/cabin) and the depiction of that social class is always dysfunctional and often criminal. That needs to change too and it could, if Caryl lead the way.

DA survivors finding love and being able to trust is also, again, something that deserves a spotlight. Abuse is shameful and humiliating, and debilitating. People who go through that in real life need the hope that Caryl can provide. They live in a very violent world, but they've found something good in each other, and the fans who have gone through similar experiences can also find the inner strength that these two characters have.

Story integrity. Audience respect. Discussion on the bad behavior of the men in charge of TWDU is important. I will always talk about racism (even if I lose followers and fic readers over it) and I will also always talk about misogyny and sexism. I know I haven't really gotten into ageism, but that's because my topics have largely been decided by "what's in my inbox." (Feel free to drop an ask. I'd love the opportunity to talk about 'fun things' too 🙃)

All these issues are the evil siblings of the fandom and the franchise. One isn't more pressing than the other and that's the reason why different factions shouldn't turn on each other. We need to lift each other up, as well as the characters and the women who play them. We won't get ahead by tearing each other down and that's why I try to focus on providing information rather than being angry at individuals who may behave badly.

When I was a kid, my mom always told me why she wanted me to do this or not do that, and it stuck with me, because she showed me respect as an individual of my own, even if I was a 5-year old. People are more likely to listen if you don't speak in anger, if you afford them their dignity and you're not authoritarian... and I haven't walked in anyone else's shoes. I don't know what they're going through, so I try to give the benefit of doubt as to people's motives for what they do/say. I'm not ignoring bad behavior. I try to counter it in my posts, even if I have minimal outreach. Change starts at grassroots level, you know? "Be like water making its way through cracks."

Thanks for reading my fic 🙏😊 I really appreciate that. I've been rewatching S11, so I can get back into writing Stick Figures, but it's not a season that makes you excited about its storytelling. Double edged sword since I need the little details as tie-ins to my 'red thread' arc.

[stagefoureddiediaz]

I'm not sure who to ask, but you always seem happy to answer questions, so I'm sending this your way.

I'm "newish" to the fandom. Never really kept up with spoilers and metas and things like that. So, I'm curious if you could tell me: Has the buddie speculation always been like this? Like, it just seems like the people promoting the show are really pushing thoughts to connect to Buddie happening.

And it's fun and exciting. Don't get me wrong, but I guess I'm just wondering how prepared I should be to not get my hopes up?

Love your blog, and I hope you're doing well ❤️

Hey Nonnie

I'm so sorry its taken so long to get round to answering this ask. I am always happy to answer asks and I'm so glad you sent this my way - even if I'm not sure if I'm the best person to answer it!

firstly welcome to the fandom - I hope you enjoy being a part of it with us!

in answer to your actual question, it depends on if you mean the promo team or if you mean the teams making the show - as in the script writers, set, props and wardrobe departments etc.

If you mean the former, things in terms of promotion aren't really that much different from pre season 6, we've had a bit more from cast members other than Oliver this season than last (they let Ryan out of his cage a little bit for starters!!) , but its not really been that much different to before.

If you are talking about the teams making the show then yes they have stepped up their game considerably this season. A lot of people rat on Kristen Riedel as showrunner, which I think is grossly unfair -things might've been a bit bumpy in transition when she took over -(I personally think she tried to take too much on by writing, directing and being showrunner, but she realised this and stepped back in order to do right by the show and that says a huge amount about her) but actually we are getting a lot more tying up of loose ends and making use of things in canon that wouldn't have happened under Tim - KR is a master of making use of what canon has already put in place to build on the story and flesh out characters far more than we see in a lot of shows.

It is important to note that the showrunner has final say about pretty much everything that we see on screen, about what is being put out there - if KR didn't want the step up in buddie related metaphors such as the couch then we wouldn't be seeing it on our screens so the fact we are seeing it is telling and there really isn't any other way to read it other than the intention is there from the show for Buddie to go canon - slow burns are just that a slow burn - we're not going to get it all given to us in 2 episodes - that would be a diservice to the characters and to the work the show has been doing. They started the build up for this at the beginning of season 3 (I remain convinced that it wasn't part of the plan in season 2, just a happy accident that they decided to play around with a bit in the later part of the season to see if it had legs or if it was just a bit of a flash in the pan) and there has been a very purposeful build up since then.

KR and the PR department are not going to explicitly say 'oh yes Buck and Eddie are endgame' in interviews - that would spoil the journey and they are never going to do that. I keep saying it , and others do to, Buddie going canon is huge - it will literally be the first queer romance slow burn on television that has been done with intent and given the same amount of care and consideration as a heterosexual slow burn on any other show and there is absolutely no way they are going to ruin the build up or the moment it happens - they want us to be kept guessing until it happens - that is good storytelling, they want us to still be surprised when it happens because even if we know its going to happen we don't know how or exactly when.

This show is incredibly good at taking us in one direction before changing tack and misdirecting us for a little bit. None of us were quite prepared for just how badly Buck was going to deal with his Everest sized mountain of trauma -we knew he was traumatised and we knew he needed to deal with it, but not a single person saw just how badly it was going to play out (or how much it was going to hurt us when it happened), but we do know that the show likes happy endings and likes to show healing so however bad it might be right now, Buck will come out the other side a better person who has had some major growth and ready - ready for Buddie canon - because he wasn't there yet - we all knew that!

I am totally prepared to be wrong, and feel free to come at me with knives if I am, but there has been too much intentional build up this season (and even last season which was building us up to where we are now as well) for things to go in any direction other than Buddie - we just have to trust the show and the process and enjoy the ride because I have no doubt its gonna throw us another curveball or two on the way but when we get there its going to just be so epically good!

Sorry I think I went of on a bit of a ramble 😳😳😳 but I hope it was worth the read! I'm always here to answer questions!

[radiocity]

honestly, what's your take on the l word? atp i can't tell if it's just shit but i'm too far along to stop. the 5th and 6th seasons seem to be done in a complete different tone too and there's so many problematic aspects just slapped in for unecessary drama. still.. i like the main characters a lot and it is representation at the end of the day. Maybe it would've been cooler if they just did more of a 'slice of life' thing instead of 'drama rama cheating on people is like a slip of the hand thing due to the strong nuclear force'

anyway interested in your take, what do you think are the well- and badly- handled aspects of the show, how do you reflect on the story and character building?

stay cool out there (◕‿◕)♡

MY TAKE ON THE L WORD? getting this ask made me so excited you have no idea how much I love talking about the l word. So excited in fact that I wrote 6165 words about it, sorry, I am so severely unemployed right now. here, I talk about my thoughts, some theory, and then break down some of the intrinsic problems with the show, specifically how it thinks about gender and nonconformity, race, and transgender identities, within the scaffolding of it being a show concerned with women who have relationships with other women, rather than necessarily a truth of lesbianism. i’m citing various linked sources and very loosely using an academic approach, but it’s more like a messy collage of sources than it is a fully fleshed out argument and narrative! if you want the tl;dr, I’d recommend scrolling to the final 3 paragraphs

tbh I haven’t watched it in a while but I really want to rewatch the whole thing and go back to my gif series instead of just making random sets (don’t be put off by my absence its bc I was doing my master’s degree and then I got really sick) and maybe thinking so intensely about tlw these past 3 days will inspire me into it .

I’d be really interested in hearing any thoughts on response to any of this, even though it’s not particularly well written or formulated, so feel free to drop a message/reply/response anywhere if u or anyone else is compelled to. anyway response under the cut ->

so, my opening thoughts on the l word revolve around two things: there is nothing about this show that makes it an inherently lesbian show, and that it functions as a product of its time, not in culture but in Hollywood and show running. the imagined audience of TLW isn’t necessarily the modern ‘sapphic’ audience watching things like First Kill (2022), Do Revenge (2022), or Crush (2022) which are all, generally, pointed towards a younger audience seeking things like validation and romantic projection (from what I understand, and I’ll admit I haven’t watched any of these! But I have read synopsis and seen clips, so I’ll watch soon I promise). I do think this conversation has re-emerged a little in the growing conversations about wanting sexy lesbians having sex, which is a conversation that surrounded Love Lies Bleeding (LLB, 2024) for quite a while, repeating this argument that what lesbians want isn’t romance or tension, but sex, real sex, sex on screen and sex on TV. of course, it’s a little difficult for showrunners to ‘do’ sex or sexual content without it being so brazenly for men – and here I’ll step out and say when, in this context, I discuss women being looked at and ‘male gaze’, it’s more under the original theory of laura mulvey that women are objectified by the camera as men are in control of production, and here I’ll link the article (it’s very short, but I refer largely here to section B) – and to equally appeal to women looking at women but who are, equally not free from patriarchal understandings of the ‘correct’ and ‘incorrect’ ways of being attracted to women. I feel a good example of how we saw this was the big tiktok-wide discussion about sapphic cottage-core as an equally white endeavour, a sort of softcore launching of racist white American ideals of frolicking on a plantation. For showrunners to produce sexual lesbian content now, it needs to contend with who will be doing its marketing for them, i.e. a lot of people on tiktok talking about how LLB is for the ‘lesbian gaze’, whatever that means, or that these things are perhaps attractive to men in general, but are specifically geared to being attractive to lesbians specifically. Actually candace Moore, in a really brilliant article (and if u want access and don’t have it… just let me know) describes, through gaze theory, the notion of the straight viewer as a “tourist” and the “traveller”. Here:

Problematizing a distinction between the tourist, who "gladly or unknowingly accepts Disneyland's versions of the world's wonders," and the traveler, who "seeks and knows how to recognize authenticity," Strain argues that perhaps these archetypes are, if not one and the same, both victims to the notion that there is an "authenticity" available to be misrecognized, or grasped, in the first place. (10) But what of the lesbian viewer? (11) At first glance it would seem that the lesbian viewer falls outside of the already-tenuous tourist and traveler distinction, being a "local" intimately familiar with this culture. However, insofar as lesbian spectators are consuming mediated images of themselves, I argue that not only do straight audiences engage in a form of tourism when viewing the The L Word, but lesbian audiences, even those from Southern California, do too. The distinction between the tourist, the traveler, and, in this case, the local-as-consumer becomes blurred. Locals drawn to the latest "lesbian attraction," lesbians enjoy The L Word's eye candy along with straight "tourists." Like straight "travelers," they seek to identify albeit illusory "authentic" elements of the representation. However, for the queer viewer, the mediated reality of the show will never match up to reality. While the tourist and the traveler of The L Word are at base one and the same, the distinction between them lies not in what they are, but what they think they are; how they conceive of their own intentions, levels of "expertise," relationships to the local culture, and the "gains" that they take away--whether they travel for pleasure or for knowledge. It is through the enticement of lesbian sex (a spectacle of attraction for straight and queer viewers alike) and through the wonderment of either "understanding" the other or "recognizing" oneself (fantasy of authenticity), through both "watching from a remove" and "being there," that The L Word captivates its straight and queer tourists.

Pulling away from the academic angle, I don’t agree with the idea of LLB being for a lesbian gaze, nor do I think that TLW was ‘for’ lesbians more than it was ‘enjoyed’ by lesbians – a show that can hit as many audiences at once is a good thing. dennis cass for the slade in 2004 wrote that the L word “often feels like it’s not about being gay at all” and that a lot of what the show presents is pretty removed from any lesbian experience as we know it, additionally writing on bette and tina’s marriage counselling that they “aren’t merely in couples therapy, they’re seeing one of L.A.’s hottest personal gurus—that you not only forget they’re lesbians, but that they live on Earth.” A pretty accurate read for how removed a lot of TLW is from anything, and, to me, sort of bypasses any notion of ‘representation’ by just how fantastical it is. ginia bellafante also wrote in 2009, after s6 aired, that “’The L Word’ is a Sapphic Playboy fantasia in which women with wrinkles or squishy thighs or an aversion to lingerie appear to have been flagged down on the freeway with urgent instructions to move to Seattle”. basically, yeah

TLW itself is very clearly appealing to its heterosexual audiences at the same time it appeals to lesbians, even through the same mechanisms – the character’s conventional attractiveness, their skinniness, their lack of bras and how you can 9/10 times see their nipples through their shirts, and all the lesbian sex shown in as much detail as they could get away with – and that is the core driving force of the show in a lot of ways. we can’t really have another TLW today for the same reasons that all media from the early 2000s has shifted to give women more complex characters, arcs, appearances, and functions – and that’s a good thing, obviously – which in turn demonstrates the lack of these things the characters in TLW actually had. At its core, it’s sexy and men are the people behind the companies getting it on TV, not necessarily specific men but the shadow of patriarchy and how women exist on the screen. This isn’t to say media creation and output has become a liberal utopia for women’s rights, but rather there has definitely been a shift in how women exist on screen and what roles they were given before – think easy fast and furious, or megan fox in transformers, or even how very popular musicians styled themselves and appeared to the massive; Shakira, Jennifer lopez, Britney spears, etc – which, to me, reflects a way in which TLW capitalises off the straight heteropatriarchy in its desire to show sexy women at all times, always available to be ogled. in a way, this sorta aligns with bellafante’s observation that the show had ‘never aligned itself with the traditionalist ambitions of a large faction of the gay rights movement’ (written in 2009, 6 years before gay marriage was legalised in the us) – the liberator in the l word is sex, and that’s what all the characters are constantly aiming for, nothing else. Similarly, the show gets so obsessed with defining who or what a lesbian is (throughout the whole of s1 as they look for signs of lesbianism in jenny, with jenny at that party, or with dana talking about her ‘gaydar’, and so by doing this it turns lesbianism into a visual brand, something that be hidden in plain sight, appeasing both the hetrosexual viewer and the lesbian seeker - Martina Ladendorf describes a branding of lesbian identities through TLW in a form of “thingification”, and so “the representations of lesbian identities are discursively displaced and the identity position “lesbian” is partially filled with new meanings in the televised text of The L-word.”  Ladendorf offers a far more generous reading than I do – to me, a lot of TLW needs to extrapolate lesbians from their womanhood and vice versa, creating a sort of woman who is a lesbian, rather than, simply, a lesbian

naturally, the l word is inherently a misogynist show , and in a lot of ways I think it’s unavoidable to think about when it comes to discussing schematics or opinions of the show, it’s a show full of, in the words of liz feldman in this interview, ‘beautiful lesbians with just nothing but time on their hands… and just somehow also money’. Obviously, the stereotypes the show puts forwards make it feel pretty cheap at time, and when the show ventures out into attempting to either tackle or just include plotlines about poverty, racism, transphobia, infidelity, (or plotlines it totally avoids, like conversations on butchness, gender non-conformity, or transfemininity), it honestly just gets stranger and stranger, not to mention the very active racism present in the show, via how pam grier’s character was written, handled, and expanded upon when she was by far one of the most skilled and seasoned actors on the show. a lot of issues I and other people have are through this lens, and hence why a lot of the pushback focuses on how little was understood about trans people in mainstream media back then, or how the show was just such a landmark moment that it was purely reflective of the times so it’s just nit-picking to be pointing out all its negative parts, which isn’t a sentiment I agree with at all, and instead I think of the l word as being both progressive and problematic for these reasons. Even as an addition, I feel like TLW is why we just don’t really need more tv shows like the L word… because we have the L word, and it’d be nice if we could have something different

so, when I talk about and recommend the l word I usually put it in these terms: season 1 is a phenomenal piece of storytelling and such a compelling way to create and introduce a show all about lesbianism to a world that is not filled with parallel lesbians, but rather is the only show on air in the world doing that exactly, and, following that, season 4 gets a little art deco and experimental as it pushes its characters through new, meaningful struggle, like tasha working in the military under ‘don’t ask don’t tell’ (fuck the army though), max living his new reality as a trans man (yeah it was dealt with horribly), bette dating jodi and this inviting so much conversation about art, disability, and deafness into the mix, and, in other ways, jenny and tina working together on her show, helena’s… gambling addiction or whatever, kit’s nonsense relationship shane’s nonsensical relationship. Imo these two seasons show the best of what the L word has to offer, which is, in S1, a sensitive introduction that pushes jenny through the wringer as she really becomes herself and takes hold of her destiny, and then in S4, these characters all essentially performing at their apex, in love, making mistakes, trying again, to the best of the l word’s ability to show any of this (relatively speaking, it’s the best TLW ever gets)

with all this in mind, I do think the show thrives in really profound ways at times. The real hook of it is, and always has been, season 1, which is just this ferociously strong exploration in television about such a serious sensitive topic, jenny’s coming out. a lot of criticism sort of facetiously responds to jenny’s character by focusing on her writing quality (which I honestly thought was fine lol!), and will ignore sincerely engaging with her in favour of laughing at how bad her character became as the writer’s lost the plot more and more, but I really do think that jenny in the first two seasons was just phenomenal, and mia kirshner’s fantastic meditative performance just stole the entire show for me. In season 1 as we are introduced to the show and their world through jenny’s process of coming out and ripping her life apart at the seams to live her ideal life (even if it was very explosive with marina and didn’t end well), which I just thought was such captivating writing about that moment of choice, where a character has to decide whether or not they’ll live their easy life or do the difficult thing. one of the scenes I have always come back to is in s1 where jenny has sex with tim and cries afterwards because that moment for her is the one where she realises she just can’t do it anymore, and seeing that in the show was just really otherworldly for me, I loved it and I thought it was amazing, and then later on in season 2 where jenny asks shane to cut her hair for her – a real splitting off from her regular, comfortable life, to ‘become’ a lesbian in heart and soul, was again just another moment where the writing and directing teams could really show some muscle in just how good the show could be, before dropping all presences and going back to whatever drivel they’d been doing. As a more technical note on the show, the inconsistent directors and writing is really hilarious, and sometimes the drop in quality between episodes is… staggering, to say the least

tbh s1 functions well as a drama-comedy mix because those scenes, as well as tina and bette’s fertility journey, is spliced within the rest of the nonsense going on, which I felt crafted this really enjoyable diametric swing throughout . arguably more than anything, jenny’s coming out was the best and most meaningful part of the show, and I really haven’t seen much other lesbian media hold a candle to it (though I could name a few). What they did with jenny as the show went on was disappointing to say the least, but s2 had a lot of heart in it as they attempted to have her coming to terms with her abuse (naturally, having finally discovered herself in s1) and focus more on what makes her happy – her writing. As the show continued to develop and jenny’s character just morphed into this unrecognisable thing, I even still think mia kirshner could perform such a charming take on it that I never really aligned myself to a lot of the jenny hate people joke about

other drama aspects in mind, like bette and tina’s marriage falling apart, bette’s other relationships (bette always seems to be the one facing the ‘serious problems), and even dana’s cancer and subsequent death, I thought were generally handled… ‘well’. Dana’s cancer worked interestingly within this as, while it was kind of bizarre, I think the relationship between alice and dana was a real life force on the show for a  while, and that whole situation meant that alice could go through some real, meaningful growth in her character which she’d been a little starved of to that point. perhaps my thoughts are that when the show focuses on cheating as the only method of things falling apart, that’s when it really starts to fumble, because cheating at that level is such a sitcom-only esque plotline that removes a lot of reality you might be looking for and finding charming in these shows. Equally, I just think cheating can be quite an alienating plotline!

But, to talk about writing alone, my god it gets shit. Various parts of the writing I remember disliking off the top of my head are dana’s season 2 girlfriend which turns into a weird trope of the pretty girls vs the ‘uglier’ one (her then-gf), when the max arc is in full swing (though I’ll be clear as well and say I loved Daniel Sea’s acting within the role, however bad the writing was), papi and the racism that guided the writers in constructing her character, the random plotline of the guy living with shane and jenny in season 2 (though I thought it could have been really interesting, almost a meta comment on men watching lesbians, men watching the l word, men watching lesbians in media).  Helena’s entire character was a little baffling to me, and while I did enjoy her at times and thought she was a hilarious addition to the cast, I just had no clue exactly what she was doing. Parts of the shows ideology itself is equally harmful, like alice and dana shopping for strap-ons (bc alice is bisexual and therefore loves penetrative sex, and dana is a lesbian and therefore doesn’t), or just that the shows ensemble cast reflects the background, and everyone is cis white thin feminine, etc.  until they’re not, like ivan or papi, or Dylan..? (or a character’s non-whiteness function as a sort of ethnic flair to them, say papi and carmen being Latina and that being their exciting ‘exotic’ traits), that floods the show with a very recognisable sort of white Hollywood liberalism, and if we can understand and comprehend that, we get a good working frame for the rest of what’s going on. as alice and tasha were arguing about the military it was, of course, them trying to suggest that alice is this very liberal character who disagrees with the war and tasha’s politics, but not enough to…. Break things off with her. Instead (fashion tumblr user steps in) she even joins in this roleplay and dresses more femininely around her, growing out her hair a little and everything – and alice in general usually had a pretty fluid sense of style, so it was an… interesting choice. And then Jamie shows up for some reason (and is similarly one of the very few reoccurring Asian characters on the show – her, Catherine (one of helena’s stupid love interests) and adele (who is not serious); actually to make a side note on how this show was received, there was even a petition to get the character’s from alice wu’s Saving Face (which is a brilliant movie, and you should watch it) to be on the show and bring more Asian representation, from autumn 2008)

One episode I think is pretty good for reading the ethos of how TLW engages with women who aren’t their ‘ideals’ is shown is, imo, episode 3? 4? of season 1, where lacey is harassing shane for moving on from her. Lacey is one of the very few characters who leans a little more into being gender nonconforming, yes still with the full face of makeup, but with heavy punk-ish eye makeup, short hair, leather jacket, a demanding attitude, (and she’s not fat, but definietely has more weight on her than any of the verrrrry skinny main cast), and all-in-all embodies a kind of paltry attempt at TLW at bringing in someone with more of an edge, perhaps a modern day masc we might imagine – she’s really one of the only women I can think of on the show, let alone women that shane gets with, who isn’t an ultra-feminine character with long hair, tall, skinny, petite frame, etc. devoid of reality, the show really pushes on her as this over-demanding woman who reactedly badly to shane using her and moving on, and of course the show is trying to show us that shane uses people without much care for them, but doing so through lacey lets you sympathise more with shane than it would if they’d brought in a far more feminine woman who could play that damsel in distress role through looks alone. Lacey’s problems are like a pet or a child’s wherein you do what they want (in this case, another 1 night stand) to appease them, and then you get them off your back. The writing itself is very bizarre, but the fact that they used a woman who was just a little left of centre from the standard the show had set of these beautiful women in Hollywood, demonstrates enough

likewise, to go from here and talk about gender non-conformity, one of the strangest lines on the show was always kit in season 3 episode 9 saying “It just saddens me to see so many of our strong butch girls giving up their womanhood to be a man” – why she said that, I don’t know, some sort of meditation on her bizarre relationship with ivan perhaps? But that relationship fell apart because ivan was… not a man… and couldn’t be a man… whereas max is a man and could be a man, so I just don’t know.

Kit: Why can't you be the butchest butch in the world... and keep your body? Max: Because I wanna feel whole.

and he is so punished for that split away from butchness into transness, even by the woman who is notably placed outside of the lesbianism of the show – which is arguably worse than having one of the lesbians come at him for it, as kit is more or less representative of “the rest of the world” in these types of conversations, pushing max away from transition while the lesbians of the show, the ones who, you would imagine, have had some sort of intersection with transness once before (again, notably shane, who, as part of her traumatic backstory, was mistaken for a boy when she was a teenager and was paid by men to give them a handjobs) . instead the show curiously places kit there as some voice of reason, and the rest of the lesbian cast are kind of fast and loose with the whole thing. when they do talk about butchness in s3e3, it’s just bizarre. Pre-transition max pulls shane with him to unpack the car as “us butches”, and carmen giggles and jokingly calls shane a “big butch” even though, again, she’s the closest thing the show gets to reoccurring butchism, and is likely seen and imagined as butch by a lot of the people watching . at dinner later on in the episode, they make a joke about him not being “stone butch”… as if that’s a way of measuring masculinity rather than a sexual identity, before shane interrupts the conversation to say “You know what, what difference does it make whether someone is butch or femme?”. again, she is the butchest one at the table, and very notable not butch, but has gone up so close to the border before, you really wonder… why. Why there is such intense resolution to not make her butch, but really it’s because TLW functions in the absence of the butch – alice eler puts it succinctly: “The L-Word asserts that a “femme” lesbian woman is more desirable than a “butch” lesbian.”

In tlw, butch and femme are always roles played rather than realities lived, so it defaults to femininity being ‘standard’  - and this is where, imo, a lot of reaction to max’s transition hinges on. If the show can’t allow any character to firmly be ‘butch’, so when a character takes on butchness as a passage to realising his truth, that he is a trans man, it pulls out all the ugly thoughts and feelings held by certain lesbians about trans men who were, previously, identifying as lesbians/butch lesbians. Here, it really creates a perfect storm for TLW to uphold dangerous ideology (how they showed max’s transition was horrible), and justifying their cis lesbian audience’s response (they got angry that the only character who transgressed gender went ‘too far’ with it, essentially, living his truth in a way they didn’t like). I imagine, if TLW had functioning butch characters on the show, this all might’ve played out differently, but if TLW let go of its standard of femininity, then it… isn’t sexy, becoming too lesbian and too trans and alienates its non-lesbian audience, getting too deeply invested in its lesbianism than it is with its glamour. An interview with Ilene chiaken that gets thrown around a lot is here: on max, “She’s our first real butch on the show — a fabulously attractive butch, but nonetheless a real butch,” Chaiken said. “And we deal with the issue of gender. We wanted to tell that story, a big story in the gay community and, in the last couple years, a huge story in the lesbian community.” it’s an interesting statement for sure– gender transgression has always been a part of lesbianism (read any book ever), and with the advent of the internet and online communities – afterellen being founded in 2002 – more conversations could be had by lesbians from all walks of life, from any economic background or lived reality of race, ability, anything.  jack halberstam writes interestingly in Transgender Butch about butch/ftm borders that,

The distinction that some butches need to make between lesbianism and butchness hinges on a distinction between sexual and gender identities. Lesbian, obviously, refers to sexual preference and to some version of the “woman-loving woman.” Butch, on the other hand, bears a complex relation of disidentification with femininity and femaleness and, in terms of sexual orientation, could refer to “woman-loving butch” or “butch-loving butch.

butchness, and max’s ex-butchness, is never truly interacted or responded to in the show – ivan states he doesn’t mind being referred to as a he, shane half-heartedly defends butchism by asking her friends to stop talking about it, and max finds himself as a man through a meaningful identification with butchism and ‘disidentification’ with femininity to then finding a reidentification with not just masculinity, but manhood, which lends way to him truly discovering himself. Curiously, in response to this, this reidentification is one step too far, and suddenly its actually ok to be butch on the l word. The rest of the cast seems to ask him over and over again, why by a man? Why not be butch? But in the world of TLW, to be butch and to be trans are both radical acts of nonconformity, to disidentify is to no longer be the thing that sells, so you very fundamentally cannot do any of it – lisa the male lesbian in s1 is played for laughs as a transmisogynist  punchline, and carmen giggling at the idea of shane being butch (and thus disidentifying) demonstrates that this is equally hilarious.

from this angle, i feel that TLW functions primarily as a show about women attracted to women, not lesbians attracted to lesbians (lesbian as gender, as identifier, as being). Immovable womanhood is the centre of everything, constructing familiarity, and to stray is to exit safe perimeters that TLW establishes within unradical, conformist, cisgendered white femininity. candace Moore, again, writes that TLW “positions lesbianism as a sensibility, not a sexuality. This is particularly important because as a sensibility, lesbianism can potentially be co-opted by straight viewers.”

of course, it would be remiss to fail in mentioning that much of this discussion about tlw’s association to butchness is very much within whiteness as well – we can argue that tasha is a stud even if she never says the word herself, her specific attraction being to “girly girls” and her riding a motorbike, always with a more masculine wardrobe, and being in the……. Army………. Really aligns her with this sentiment. I do think she’s a stud, but this being off the back of the show’s depiction of max sits so strangely, and we can’t ignore that her blackness is so instinctually connected to how they wrote her – in a world where no one else can be a butch, why then is the only dark skinned black lesbian more masculine leaning than the rest of them? yes, racism, and all tied in to her nationalism and dedication to the army. It’s certainly an interesting choice for the writers to make and, while she is one of my favourites in the whole show, I definitely have a lot of pause with why she was written and created the way she was, and what she offers the show politically – she holds space as a particularly vulnerable body, a dark skin black stud lesbian, but maintains the status quo of the country and of American imperialism. What’s the message? Even the most unavailable of lesbians can still be patriots??? the individual's physical unfuckable body is still acessible through american aligience?

As later seasons continued to get worse, parts I did really enjoy were tasha’s entire character, molly’s entire character, seeing tina ‘get her life back’ as it were and return to painting, jodi’s entire character, all the music featured, and bette and tina getting back together was really well written and laurel holloman and Jennifer beals are just two very strong actors steering that ship, and random moments throughout I really enjoyed (specifically bette’s professional life gave a lot of breathing room for the show to have other funny little characters, like her office assistants etc) that I’m struggling to remember here rn tbh but generally even as the show was getting bad, the more ridiculous things got the more fun I was having, but the later seasons ‘drama’ was a little painful. If it had started as a drama and then shifted into something more palatable, I think it would’ve been great, but really anything that wasn’t season 6 would have been fine.. just such an unforgiving and cruel way to end the show, and I thought adding jenny to the mix of toxic sad relationships after leaving her straight life and coming to terms with her abuse was such a mean-spirited and cruel way to end it IDK! And this is why the l word FAILS as a sitcom, bc at least usually (to my knowledge) the  idea is that at the end… they’re kinda happy and stepping into another new life with some stability and lifelong friends!!! But instead TLW said fuck you and I hate you

anyway yeah closing thoughts… if you watch TLW without even thinking about representation I think it’s an easy watch, bc what I was watching it for is psycho lesbians who don’t act normally and that’s what I got. All caricatures of themselves or whatever they’re performing in the shadows of, and, in a way – and maybe this is a little weird to say – but I think the lesbians in the show are, to me, like watching a species of lesbian that I myself am not. Which is a shame because, if I recall correctly, a lot of those musical performances in the show were about exposing the world to lesbian music that broke the norm and went against the stereotype of music people associated with lesbians at the time, showing them on the cutting edge of new sound, which somehow did not cross into the actual meat of the show at all. And I haven’t spoken at all about it here, but a lot of those musical features are my favourite parts of the show and made some of those scenes just electric, magical parts of storytelling on tv

to address the “you”/I in what “I think”, and this one actually is TMI, when I first watched the L word, it was when I had really just finished coming to terms with my own lesbianism back in late 2021, early 2022 (I was gay and trans before this, but hiding from myself and my sexuality and my gender in complex ways, living a sort of double life online and offline – this was more an unforgiving reckoning with who I was vs what the life I was leading looked like). i was finally letting myself think about it holistically, reflecting on conversion therapy and how I navigated my desires and my identity. I wrote a lot of melodramatic diary entries and was trying to figure out how to handle a 3 year long semi-formed, confusing, and impressively undefined ‘situation’ship I was in with a guy while I was living alone during a gap year. all I really did in this time was go to the gym, go on walks, go to therapy, and think… a lot. by the time I started watching TLW I had come to terms with my lesbianism (and its inextricable relationship to my gender), but watching jenny go through something I had basically been in the thick of myself (just without all the sex and the cheating and the sex and the sex and the sex), and was, at that point, yet to experience the real horror of, meant a lot to me, and, just from some reading online, I’ve understood too how the early seasons of TLW really helped a lot of other lesbians come out to themselves or start thinking about where they might sit in relation to lesbianism. again, TLW fails time and time again at any sort of political radicalism, but when you’re so, so painfully alone and you don’t really have anyone to talk to about these desires, or even have the strength to talk about these things out loud, I do think somehow the unabashed desire flung around the screen of TLW does one thing, and that is to declare that lesbianism doesn’t have to be in your head, and that even good change can be really difficult when it’s something like this, and that, to me, was the best thing TLW added to the conversation about lesbian TV and reflects, for a lot of lesbians who find themselves trying to navigate repression and abuse, the experience that we’re still moving through: taking hold of our lives with our own hands

beyond that, beyond being a story about transformation – which I do think really permeates the first season (dana coming out to the world and to her parents; shane learning how to love or whatever the fuck genuinely; tina and bette trying and failing and trying to live the life they’d always dreamt of; marina navigating her own bad relationship through a sort of uncaring outwards desire;  bette ‘choosing’ the wrong path from her married life and cheating; kit re-entering the world of professional music and working hard to get into that music video thing situation – I think s1 is just such a rare gem of tv, that had so many flaws in it and so much was mishandled, but it came to it all with a lot of heart. But still that same angle is what alienates it from reality and sets it up as this fantasy land of woman-who-engage-in-lesbianism and abstractifies lesbian reality to make way for lesbian (or straight) fantasies of standard hegemony with a little zest. As it goes on however, it falls so hard to the more difficult aspects already clear at its start, and dramatizes their sexual escapades and relationships endlessly in a way that gives, says, and does nothing. jill dolan describes it well, albeit more positively than I have here: “part of the fun has become to simply go with it, to enjoy its excesses of character and plot and to tolerate its rather sweetly absurd attempts at relevance and authenticity.” and you really can ‘go with it’ for a while, but to put it shortly, TLW is not a show worth following to the end of the earth

[beelzeballing]

good morning. dealing with the ofmd s2 finale Badly.

idk im really upset. not because "bury your gays" or whatever, apparently theres people saying that shit? no thats not the issue here. everyone in this show is gay. what are you talking about.

its that izzy was like... the personification of the show's message. he opened up, he learned to love and be loved, he gave that entire speech to ricky which may as well have been the show's fucking thematic statement... and they killed him. he found love and joy and community and they killed him for it.

and then they had the nerve to put the words "ed, i want to go" into his mouth. no the fuck he does not. his entire dying monologue was so bad i genuinely don't even have the words to describe it. parts of it were wrong, parts were inconsistent, parts were straight up antithetical to the show, i cannot believe how badly they cocked this up. and then there were just randomly like 8 minutes left of the episode? as if nothing happened?

and what for? what fucking for? this was not a natural (or satisfying) fucking conclusion to his arc, no matter how much djenkins insists on it. izzy died for no fucking reason. none of the plot threads that his death was supposed to messily tie up needed him to die. he couldve become the new captain, this time accepted and loved and supported by his crew, calling back to s1. stede and ed couldve continued sailing and izzy couldve remained first mate. probably a bunch more stuff that i cant think of rn cuz im not terribly creative and also too upset. but i fundamentally believe izzy dying wouldve been a fucking terrible choice either way, no matter the execution.

this ending was a rushed hack job. im sure this isnt fully on the showrunners, but im hesistant to fully 'absolve' them of the blame for this either. i dont know. if theres ever a third season coming, i seriously doubt im gonna watch it. i dont think it should be cancelled or w/e but personally, this writing decision doesn leave me with much faith for a third season. plus obviously my favorite character is fucking dead so. yeah. thats my take after sleeping on it.