#time to see if the legends are true
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"but Pyramids of Mars established that Sut-" my friend this is the three-separate-explanations-for-Atlantis show, as far as I'm concerned they can have a free-for-all when it comes to real-world mythology
"but they're ruining the canon!!" buddy I got good news for you, Doctor Who canon is a buffet and you don't have to eat anything you don't want to
#to be clear this is NOT about disliking whatever they're doing with Sutekh#I'm going to try and watch Pyramids of Mars this week and I may hate the direction they choose to go in in the finale! who knows!#I wasn't a fan of a bunch of the choices they made for the Toymaker (though that is slightly different in that it's not a real world myth)#but there's a specific type of comment I've been seeing mostly in youtube comments which. yeah dead dove etc#but people getting worked up over the One True Canon is like. you know what show this is right??#I personally choose to ignore the buffet dish that is the First Doctor in Twice Upon A Time#anyway peace and love#the legend of ruby sunday#the empire of death#pyramids of mars#doctor who#dw spoilers#ramblings
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Linktober Day 8. Tunic
#linktober#linktober 2024#the legend of zelda#wind waker#ocarina of time#loz#loz ww#loz oot#link#josh art tag#had a lot of fun with this one despite how annoying it was to draw#oot link was at a difficult angle and i also just could not shade this for the life of me. restarted the shading like 3 times#i think im reaching that point in the cycle i typically go thru with my artstylr where ive grown tired of my shading style#to the point that i forget how to do it and it never quite looks right#so if my next post features changes to my artstyle thats why lol#but i enjoyed making this despite that cuz i like the ideas behind it!#i normally wouldve redesigned ww!link's outfit but i purposefully drew it accurately#to highlight how its more like a costume. cuz thats kinda what it was! and its modeled after the hero of times clothes#but is pretty innacurate. which i think is cool.. shows how much time has passed and how the view of the hero of time has warped#so i also purposefully made oot link wearing my redesigned outfit for him (even if you cant see much of it at this angle)#to further emphasize how ww!link's outfit is not only essentially a costume but is also quite innacurate#i like having ww!link ditch the costume for something else to show how he stops being some kid in oot!link's shadow#and grows into a true hero of his own#hence my ww!link redesign where i put him back in the lobster shirt. but i do keep some green and something similar to the hat#to have him fit in with the other links while still being unique#look i have a lot of feelings about ww!link and oot!link#i wish zelda would do more stuff like this... i think having oot relate to wind waker makes the story more interesting#and makes ww!link more interesting! cuz he cant be the hero of time they want. but he does become the real hero they need#the oot ww tp trio is so good... and they all work great as standalone games but their connections do really add something
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Gricko never seriously cries around Hootsie. If he feels like he's going to cry he makes up some excuse and makes sure he's as far away from her, and often others, as possible. He tries to cry as quietly as possible.
#an exception is made for happy tears#otherwise he never wants her to see him cry#or hear him cry#(may or may not be based on something from a later episode)#(iykyk)#once upon a witchlight#ouaw#legends of avantris#text#this is a true fact#my own hc#gricko grimgrin#hootsie grimgrin#comic reliefs when they get sad 'i cant be sad i have to be happy all the time. this is normal to be'
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episode 7 was the best of season 2 idc don’t @ me
#the pacing was beautiful#the contrast between ekko and jayce was beautiful#ekko experiencing the life that never was#jayce finally seeing true hardships#jayce experiencing pain and suffering#jayce literally climbing up from the depths#gave his character dimension#arcane#jinx#vi#jinx arcane#arcane league of legends#league of legends#jinx league of legends#vi arcane#vi and powder#vi the piltover enforcer#ekko the boy who shattered time#arcane jayce the defender of tomorrow#jayce the defender of tomorrow#arcane ekko#arcane jayce
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Doing a bit of a Santa Clarita Diet rewatch, and while I don't know intentional any of Abby's queer-coding was (and how much was just Hewson's vibes), her relationship with Eric has such teenage comphet energy. Like whenever Abby's like "I really care about you, more than anyone, but it's hard for me to pretend I'm into the physical; this has maybe a 2% chance of working out," my lesbian ass is just nodding so hard. Like, yeah! Exactly! You don't know you're gay yet, or you sense it in yourself and try to veer away, so what's the easiest option? You find the soft nerd boy, your best friend in the world, someone you absolutely trust to have your back no matter what, and go, "Yeah, uh huh, sure. I'll try that one." You absolutely look for the most non-threatening dude in the vicinity. And then it's improved by Eric's whole thing being like "yeah, this is absolutely someone I am down bad for, but if she doesn't wind up digging me that way, she's still my best friend." It reads so true. No idea if they were ever going to actually walk down that road, but in my heart of hearts? Here for it.
#santa clarita diet#i do not have a meta tag for this show and...i do not think i need one#but i get this a little more every time i revisit the show#some of it is almost definitely hewson's powerful queer energy but like. looking at the awkwardness of the sven thing lends to it too#you're trying really hard not to see yourself as a lesbian so what's the OTHER natural option to cling to?#the popular pretty boy#and it's just so awkward and uncomfortable#and then you get the winter friendship where there's so much chemistry and that just dumbass teen recklessness#that is innate to abby as a character but also SO present in first relationships for queer kids who are just incredibly excited to be In It#and then all the lil rainbows and shit in the costuming#yeah i'll die on this hill. lesbian vibes all the way for abby hammond i love this character so much#fun fact: my soft easy-cling friend of choice also happened to be gay#and while we literally never talked about it until we were adults i know we both clocked each other in like middle school#so shoutout to my buddy alex for being a safe 'yeah sure that can be a crush i never have to do anything about' person#a true legend of a man
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the fact that it's specifically stated that faulkner lied when he said no one else knew about the house is so funny to me because
a) im used to things specifically mentioned in writing coming back and the idea of carpenter being like "well i know a place we can crash at" and her and hayward walking into the cabin and seeing faulkner n rane just standing there is unquestionably hilarious but also
b) it means that faulkner had to have told her about his past at some point and that means that when he asked to be her brother she had fully acknowledged the fact that faulkner killed one of his brothers in a traumatic misunderstanding he's reconstructed in his mind as a good thing As Well As the fact that her last brother died in an act of religious self-sacrifice, and said yes. with her little caveat. just mentally grabbing him by the collar like "listen. i don't want you to kill yourself for your god. and i hope you don't want to kill me for your god. and if either happens i am going to kick your ass in hell when both of us get there"
#eternally fascinating to me how there was setup placed at the end of s2 for faulk's cycle to come to fruition in s3 - killing carp and#reconstructing it in his head as a good and necessary part of the prophet's legend#but now it's tipped more towards carpenter's cycle - watching another brother die for the same god#except there's a twist! because it's not religious self-sacrifice this time - just standard “not seeing a way out other than death”#and if he succeeds again... well... she did dream about a tree that one time. and a lot of dead people have been turning into trees lately.#wild if true. anyway#tsv#carp n faulk#brother faulkner#sister carpenter#eyeteeth speaks#metanalysis#siblings of all time i love them. mallory n richie 4ever.
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Keiji Mogami has been dead for 40 slutty, slutty years
#i'm sorry i keep seeing that mogami/mob's mother comic#and this is ALL I CAN THINK#every time#i'm sure the timeline change is a deliberate au thing and not an error#However.#inflicting this on the wider internet in the hope that gets it out of my head#OKAY FILLER TAGS DON'T WORK ANYMORE APPARENTLY!#double sorry then!#please tumblr i just want to be very stupid in the privacy of my own blog#fuck#in case the legends are true#mp100
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had some convos tonight im a little buzzed but here are my takeaways. these might start some fires.
somehow they person I talked with is both Anakin apologist and Anakin critical. Idk how they have that exist at the same time, but I'd like to say this to him: the Jedi were victims, the Jedi were not evil, no Obi-Wan isn't evil, Obi-Wan didn't repress and abuse Anakin, no Qui-Gon Jinn was not the bestest Jedi who did things differently than any other Jedi and if only he lived he would've saved Anakin Skywalker. Anakin Skywalker did not fall because he was sleep deprived and had one bad day, he fell for a number of reasons, including that he made choices, which choice as a theme is something George Lucas very deliberately has chosen to emphasize repeatedly in Star Wars. Also, Jyn Erso is an actually interesting character and I think she does care about rebelling, the problem is the repressive totalitarian regime she lives in. It's understandable she'd be a little cynical and despondent after 20 years of Empire. TLJ is not the best sequel trilogy movie, Kylo Ren's a little bitch and should've died sooner. Dave Filoni can kiss my ass. "within the context of the prequels it's hard to see the jedi as the good guys --" no. absolutely not. get some reading comprehension you moron. that's the whole point. the whole point is the jedi were the victims of a plot designed to force them into a position where all they had were bad choices. Anakin chose to murder men, women, and children long before he ever became Darth Vader which is a fact so many people seem to gloss over. "they killed his mother -" and?? he didn't just kill her torturers, he killed children, too. your boy committed massacres and genocides in canon. im not talking about legends or any recent books in comics, but solely about the movies. I get still liking him as a character, but to say that Anakin has done nothing wrong is a take that I just can't understand.
folk music is different than country music. im sorry but it is. yes there are similarities. no I can't explain the differences. but country music is not necessarily folk music, or "stomp-clap" music as you called it. tell me you don't listen to country without telling me. arguably the best argument you could've made about the push back of country music pop-ification is the rise in popularity of artists like Zach Bryan, but you didn't, you started talking about fucking Mumford & Sons. my good dude. no. google them. they're literally described as a folk rock band.
edited 6/23 bc I realized I was drunker then i thought and this was semi-incoherent. hopefully that clarifies things.
#me#dont get me wrong I do love my boy anakin#but Anakin made choices#yeah palpatine groomed him but legit we have a whole scene in rots where palpatine asks Anakin to join him and Anakin says no#its only when palpatine uses padme that Anakin joins him#“the space monk cultists fucked him up by raising him to be space Jesus” okay then cite your sources#oh who said Anakin's the chosen one qui-gon?#the very qui-gon you said if had he lived then Anakin wouldn't have fallen?#stop christianizing Star Wars so heavily#the jedi order were a religious order yes but I'd argue against them being a cult#you could leave!!!#Anakin could've left!!!!#ANAKIN COULD HAVE AT ANY TIME WILLINGLY LEFT THE JEDI!!!#discounting all the stuff in legends#we see jedi in the clone wars tv show appearing to actively practice other religious beliefs!!!!#Plo Koon is a sage!! I forget the rest of the name for it and I think this has been recanonized#depa billaba has her mark of illumination#bariss offee follows mirialan practices like covering her hair and even appears to be praying/meditating to what is likely a mirialan god#George Lucas himself has specifically said that Anakin fell because he was greedy and selfish#George Lucas has said multiple times there's a difference between love and attachment#AHHHHHHHH#edited 6/23 and adding that George Lucas has spoken about how the prequels are about a democracy becoming a dictatorship#and anakin helps with this!! you can argue that anakin could be comparable to your ex-bf who fell into the conspiracy theory rabbit hole#and now believes that insert politician here is the one true savior#except Anakin knows that what he is doing is wrong and he still chooses to do it anyways because it benefits him
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blade gunnblade !!!!!!!!
via eliza simpson:
There are no words for this true warrior. They kill me. MMM: went in for a post show hug. Me:"ow!" Asia: "oh sorry, that's my bullet necklace." 😳........ 😍
#blade gunnblade#asia kate dillon#kapow-i gogo#eliza simpson of [angel & others in the mysteries] & [the mother line story project] & [saw ak dillon in triptych yes we're jealous]#& [princess cloudberry in kapow-i gogo]#here we also see stephen stout in the 1st pic but going ''!! surely our dear cherished blade gunnblade's back. hair's long though hmm''#only to have that cleared up by the 3rd pic thank god =']#i guess at some point blade gunnblade has blue hair & i do love that for them#i believe they're in part 3 but i have all the less information about that plausible appearance#(and of course still no info on [asia perhaps doubling roles with the longer black haired wig & ultracorp jacket in that one pic?])#one thing that would be fascinating & fun is if part 3 blade has more of part 1 kapow-i's look. the bright blue hair#looks like pink lipstick. Pure Speculation but i know the like [this is reaction to You Know How Media Is] element discussed like#part 1 thinking most [sat. morning cartoons experience; the legend of] part 2 is like when these series get sequels or just some#ep or turning point that upends its own previous established conventions. Darker more Serious / Mature Themes etc#part 3 like well sequel to That which adds yet another layer of the same factor there lol#i'm not really that versed in All This Media directly b/c i'm not that versed in / familiar with much of any media directly but#i am also not completely at sea & also one thing i could think of is like. blade is our revenge vengeance tragic anti antagonist lmao#what if after that they get to lighten up in delightful contrast to the torment & tragedy. turn more optimistic moral support bestie etc#but like i said utter speculation based on ''oh this is a look they have?'' & comments on [comments on material commenting on itself] so#could be anything! or nothing! except that it's Something enough to have been photographed a couple of times. thank god#oh hang on also we can see that that's stephen stout's character in the pic of Wearing A Black Longer Haired Wig & Ultracorp Jacket#who's to say it isn't also: yes that's blade disguised or something. underneath they have this bright blue shorter wig & Blade Outfit lol#i would cheer for that. compelling#(also noting that it didn't preclude a doubling of roles instead but; that figure Is wearing blade's necklace. makes it easy to switch to#Blade Mode backstage; makes it easy to switch to Blade Mode onstage....)#which: noted! bullet necklace! makes sense lmao. sort of#also pic 2 ft. director kristin mccarthy parker fyi. and the typical blade hair length i.e. simply asia's own.#''😳........ 😍'' soooooo true ''MMM:'' standing for ''most memorable moment:'' and also sooooo true as well#blade gunnblade is everything to me. if they died in part 3 i'm blowing this whole building up. they have bright blue hair now
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https://www.tumblr.com/thestylesindependent/720292124955951104/harry-styles-is-actually-woefully-underrated?source=share
MY HEARTTTTT i am just. so unbelievably proud of him, and the response this last leg of tour is getting is so beautiful and like a cherry on top of everything. did you see the article that anne retweeted?
this article you shared (thank you!) and this one have that similar sentiment, not only about his talent and showmanship ("his popularity should not be confused with his artistry. Styles is more than just the hoards of screaming teenage fans and strings of celebrity endorsements we’ve come to know him for. He’s actually an icon both in music and in style, and increasingly an icon in modern movements of inclusiveness and self-worth. During a concert in Houston, Texas, in 2018, he interacted with a ten-year-old boy in the crowd who had become overcome with emotion. Styles assured the young boy, “Crying is very manly. Being vulnerable is manly”. That is fucking classy, man." !!! "I see the fact that nobody is talking about him in those terms [as an icon] as proof that he is actually woefully underrated." exactly), but about the sheer radiating joy of being in those spaces together. it’s not just his house, it’s everyone’s home. it isn’t just harry’s show, it’s everyone’s.
#the amount of awe and respect we are seeing him get in real time#i’m so 🥹🥹🥹#it’s what the deserves#the article comparing him to those legends is true bc there is no other modern (male) equivalent. those are the footsteps he's following#harry styles#your delicate point of view#anonymous#letterbox
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i know i haven’t been talking about it a lot since i’ve been preabsorbed in the octopath 2 hype but POKEMON THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW!!
#mystery dungeon or you're nothing (this is a joke please don't overwhelm yourselves too much game freak. scarlet/violet dlc is enough)#riley rambles#i'm also excited for that new update to roll out since maybe i can finally do tera raids and not want to commit multiple felonies#also home connectivity my beloved <3333#i want to transfer all the hisuian zorua i managed to grab before they curtailed the shiny odds in legends arceus....#i think they're also adding something that will let you delete multiple pokemon at once like in pla? that's what the notice said at least#or maybe i misinterpreted it... either way i hope it's true i desperately need to tidy up my pc but the effort of doing it one at a time..#i have adhd beloved#anyways . excited <3 i'm mainly expecting scarlet/violet dlc but i'm not sure what to expect FROM it... so! i guess we'll wait and see :)
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back in 2010 I was dating this web designer and I wanted to start a blog, she got me set up with a pretty website for my blog and I started posting my crazy ish...'twas Pythagoreanism dot com and org, and then I claimed pythagoreanism on tumblr, but they promptly gave that handle to someone else even though I had claimed it and made a PW. So after like 2 months of tumblr/Pythagoreanism being a shit blog with like 10 posts in black and white of fucking linens hanging, I'm over here like starting an anarchist cult a la fight club, nah white sheets Pythagoreanism tumblr art blog and me are not the same lmao like I did a feckn seance with Pythagoras back in 2010 I'm like bro what do you wanna fuckin tell the world? And yeah my life got plenty more magical after that, I learned some very strange secrets, I had 4000 facebook friends but when I saw they were censoring me I just deleted it, I was locked out of tumblr over them stealing my username for like 6 years so I used an alternative tumblr in that time along with twitter, then I noticed the Twitter CEO doing genocide-tourism in Myanmar so I started a twitter boycott long before elongated muskrat bought that garbage fire, and that led me back to tumblr where I decided to embrace losing my original username, and go with the 13th Pythagoras line to evoke the reference to reincarnation and the tribute to the many claimants of having been Pythagoras, all of whom might not be wrong it's just a silly lil game but Pythagoras was a lucky philosopher to have lived a century or two before like, Alexander the Great, and then Jesus Christ, so including Pythagoras it's plausible to say those are like the 3 primary founders of western civ as we see it today. I later once saw an alleged portrait of Pythagoras and ngl he kind of looks just like me? haha only later did I discover that the freemasons literally call Pythagoras their original founder
USERNAME LORE GIVE IT TO ME NOW YOU ALL
#13thPythagoras lore#and make no mistake I have quickly become one of the best guitarists in the world during this time same for the bass#staying true to the pythagorean expertise of the stringed instrument#I might be blowing way up as a guitarist this week and funny part is I'm a better vocalist than guitarist#but the world just is not ready for my velvet vibrato voice#just feeling lucky I have a stage name haha#but yeah I'm amidst a possible big break so this is lovely I'm already at legendary skill n I recently statted jamming w true legends#and they been mad impressed by me even learning from me like wtf haha did I hyperfixate on guitar rules? oopsey#heheheh and yet I still have displayed only a fraction of my capabilities I'm still searching for a big enough venue to rly unfold my wings#music journey#and yes I'm a devastatingly poigniant lyricist#I make hozier look trite but I will crush take me to church at karaoke#I skip politics and go straight to soul with my lyrics because like lauren hill you know her politics when you see her soul#the politics need no explanation
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tag rant but man i fuckin hate the new direction for loz
#its like. this is more on like. why is it bad that theres a zelda formula. why is it bad that all of the games follow this formula#that’s their identity??? like pokemon games and fire emblem games all have their own formulas so to say#and so thats their identity thats what you expect going in thats their niche their gameplay experience identity#and i just. really fucking hate how loz seems to be going the route of just. throwing shit at the wall and trying everything else#and nothing sticks so the more recent ones just feel like open world slop that dont excel at anything#so fuck this im going to play elden ring with a double jumping horse and great and challenging combat. i’ll play minecraft#yknow? and i dont understand why loz games feeling ‘similar’ is so fucking bad like???? every game series’ entries feel similar thats the#point yknow. if they suddenly made a fire emblem that was an fps for no reason other than to break convention and break away feom the#formula then what the fuck thats not even fire emblem any more. like. idk. i kinda just despise the newer stuff bc its so. middle of the#road whatever and has just about nothing i actually like and look for in the series. they dont have that niche identity any more#its a shift that just makes them like part of the open world white noise every aspect is honed down and done better in other games#its not like the formula causes every loz game to be really predictable or blend together fuck no#theyre still each very unique from each other even if they follow the same guidelines thats the fun???#like woah i wonder how the dungeons will differ what the new story and characters will be what new items#fucking hell boo hoo this game series’ games are similar to each other. almost as if they share the same central identity#absolutely just letting off steam and frustration here i hate when ppl treat the formula as a bad thing when it’s like. what makes them loz#like fuck its not like theyre exactly the same like i said theres a great deal of variety in what each one offers no need to just chuck it#all thats the kind of shit i come to loz for. i go to fire emblem for the specific leveling up strategy gameplay i go to pokemon for the#creature battling and specific world feel botw/totk just. do not carry with them the same signifiers of loz and they dont really have#identities beyond go do whatever the fuck which is not very compelling??? like can we at least commit to something here?#im yelling at shadows here im just. fuckin tired and feeling pessimistic abt this future of this game series whose core gameplay is one of#my all time favorites i really like the tightly designed linear-with-freedom dungeons and puzzles and world and all that#like the aesthetics changing is great and its fun to see different takes and tones on it but that core sense of things is like. The Point#of choosing to play loz yknow what i mean. like just bc its got ‘legend of zelda’ slapped on it doesnt gonna mean im gonna want to play a#vastly different experience if that makes sense. thats not the precedent thats not what you like. expect and associate with this#i feel like i sound like some entitled fuck abt this but like. is that tried and true style just going to be trashed in favor of this#honestly kinda bland everyman-ass style just bc it started to seem like it was getting stale. fuck this im gonna see what tunic’s about#likely delete later this was just a vent. ‘the zelda formula is a bad thing-‘ are you fucking serious rn#like hesitantly hopeful abt eow bc someone i know is excited for it so ill def play it but just. man
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Bigger in Texas
Pairing: Joel Miller x Reader
Summary: Joel won’t fit.
Warnings: 18+. Unprotected p-in-v. Size kink (seriously, don’t read if you hate big dicks / disgusting descriptions) Penis and pussy pronouns. Virginity loss. Age gap. Praise kink. Daddy kink. Joel ‘hung like a fucking horse’ Miller is a soft dom and also a good teacher. Competence kink (?)
Note: Somebody made a fic challenge to use penis pronouns, and I can’t for the life of me remember who it was. If y’all find them please show them this and tell them I love their brain 🫠
Update: @sp00kymulderr you’re a legend for this. Dick pronouns are engrained in my brain, and I’m forever grateful.
Word count: 2.3k
This wasn’t the life Joel Miller had pictured for himself.
The dead coming back to roam the world and eradicate most of its population, for one. The cold. Finding his baby brother way out here in Wyoming with a wife and a child on the way. The looks he was getting these days. It’s not like he’d asked to get mixed up with a girl your age. It just happened. And since damn near every-fucking-thing that had “happened” to him since outbreak day fifteen years back had been bottom of the barrel, full-blown nightmare territory, the second he saw a good thing fumble across his path, he’d seized it—you.
You, who were young enough to be his daughter.
You, who’d never seen a man fully before meeting him.
You, who hadn’t squeezed so much as a finger in herself.
But much like his past, Joel Miller was a sordid and sick kind of man, and he had the cock to prove it: presently weeping precum at the site of your softest, tightest hole, smearing the pearly-white slick through your folds with a sound so sweet it was nauseating. Begging for entrance.
“Oughta have a boy your age pop your cherry, kid.”
It was simple.
“Ain’t right havin’ a man my age all in your guts.”
And true.
The head of his cock made another wet, sickening noise through your folds, and as though instigated by the sound, your eyes flitted to the source. You smiled.
“Probably. But I want you,” you answered. Soft.
Joel got harder, and he hadn’t thought that was possible. His gaze joined yours, and the sight nearly finished him.
Beneath him, your legs had spread wider, showcasing that perfectly glistening seam alongside the head of his cock. He looked huge. Or you looked small. Or perhaps it was both, and he was old, and he really shouldn’t be doing this at all, but then his hips stuttered a bit and his length pushed in. Joel hissed and seized the headboard.
It wouldn’t even go in. The tip just stretched the rim.
“Baby, fuck—” Joel whimpered.
“He’s so big.”
Three little words from your lips, and it almost did him in.
Again.
You wriggled your hips and flashed another happy grin.
“He wants in, daddy. I can feel him pulsin’ like I am.”
You volleyed a look up to Joel as if to say, ‘So that means we’re ready, right? Will you let me have him?’
And, strangled by guilt as he was, Joel couldn’t resist.
He let his big, bulbous, leaking head sink in the tiniest bit, and he let out a groan. Your walls were so tight. This was him, too—his tip was oversized, just like the rest of him—and when it notched in an inch, Joel could see the pain flash quick in your eyes. His hips moved to retreat.
But then your heels were lifting and digging in his ass, and though strained, your voice made it out, weakly:
“Don’t, daddy. I want him.”
Joel couldn’t dream of refusing.
And his vision blurred more at that word, him.
“I-I know. He wants you too, baby—”
Another quarter-inch.
“—so, so bad.”
“Daddy!”
Joel had to blink to try and wake from his daze. His tip was so warm, hugged so perfect and snug and wet, that he didn’t even realize that was all that fit. He was stuck.
You whimpered again.
“‘S’too big, daddy. Just make him go in.”
Your eyes rolled with indignation and overwhelming pleasure alike, and your hips squirmed again. This time, you tried to nudge him in deeper, but your body simply wouldn’t budge; you’d reached the widest part of him.
“Honey, it’s—”
“Hurtin’! I need you inside me.” you cried, impatient.
“Just takes a little time to get there, darlin’—”
“Well, get to it, then. A tip ain’t enough.”
Joel’s face flushed. He might’ve been forced to bite back a laugh under any other circumstances, but this was your virginity. His bed. Your naked bodies, together, tonight.
He wasn’t about to rush it now and fuck everything up.
“This tip’s about to paint your pretty insides white and make you wait til next week to try again if you keep it up.”
That made you go still.
You shook your head while Joel released the headboard from his grip and took your hip in it instead. He grunted.
“Sweet pea, you gotta see—” he resumed, voice low, “—it won’t feel good for you or me if I just…push right in.”
You sighed, feeling his hold tighten.
“Tongue and fingers only do so much. You gotta learn.”
You whined, digging your feet in deeper when his tip drew back to your entrance. Looking a bit squeamish.
“Be brave…and patient for me.”
From the look in your eyes, Joel could tell you probably hated him right now. That was just fine. He adjusted his hips to a more comfortable place, and then he pinched your hip bone. He nudged you back, and he let you wait.
Then, right when you opened your mouth, he sank in.
Joel thrusted with only his tip, the size of a small lime, and he fucked your hole gently. Back and forth. Shallow.
It did enough. You squeezed both his forearms.
“Oh, daddy.” Your bottom lip trembled as you said it.
With his free hand, Joel smoothed your hair back.
“Yeah, what is it, baby?” he murmured, dulcet as ever, “Thought you said the tip ain’t enough for you, sugar.”
His words came slow. His strokes were delivered quick, though tenderly. Your brain appeared to be in a fog, or a trance, as your chin dipped down toward your chest, and you watched him breach the first inch of you repeatedly.
“Curious little thing.” Joel couldn’t fight the chuckle now.
“He’s so…” you trailed off.
You squeezed his arms, and he squeezed your hip back. He let you watch him fuck you with only his tip, and when your head began to tilt back from the strain, he reached up with his other hand and held the back of your neck. He felt you clench at that, and you both groaned.
“So…big,” you finished, eyes glazed.
“I know.”
This went on for the longest time: Joel stretching the first precious inch of your pussy with the head of himself, you watching and breathing deeply, whimpering occasionally, and him holding at the nape of your neck like a softer touch might lose you to him forever. Was this teaching? When you clenched again, he reckoned it was.
“That’s it, honey. Watch her swallow me.”
“Stretches real pretty for the tip, doesn’t she?”
“Bet she can’t even fit another inch of this cock.”
Suddenly, your head was jerking up under his hold.
Eyes flaring with a hot, juvenile kind of anger: “I can!”
Joel clicked his tongue against the backs of his teeth and pretended not to hear. He also had to feign indifference when your walls tightened and all but choked his head and a wave of new pleasure surged up through his body.
“She can, Joel, I’m serious!”
Another two seconds of this and Joel sensed he might see tears. Though his gaze had trailed up to yours, and the look in his appeared stern, deep down, he was just as quick to want to cave. He just hid it better than you did.
“You think so, sweet pea?”
“I know so. I need it.”
“Need him?”
“Y-Yes.”
How sweet you seemed. How naive you must be.
Joel might’ve been mean, but he wasn’t cruel. He also liked teaching lessons as much as he enjoyed showing you the way, so in the next second, he obliged. He took the last shallow thrust of his tip and sank into your cunt.
As he filled you, you whined. It only took an inch or two.
“Da-a-ddy. Please.”
You must’ve been begging for lenience. Joel retreated.
Then, much to the man’s surprise, you kicked your feet. Not in relief but in protest, shaking your head up at him:
“Put him back. Please. D-Deeper.”
It was as though Joel’s brain had exited through the back of his head and all rational thought escaped him, for the moment. The only voice he heard was yours. It was pleading. And in between your legs, you were soaked.
So drenched to allow him another inch. Then another. Then another. Joel fucked in gently and felt a seismic wave of pleasure seize his limbs—and likely yours, as well. It was as though in two blinks, you’d forgotten the pain altogether. You were suffused with need instead, eyes wincing and lips curling and sounds leaving your throat like an animal in heat. Want him deeper, please.
Joel sawed back and forth with just those five or so inches and made you writhe underneath him. Felt you clamp down on his thick, slippery cock and heard the remnants of your shared arousal making sounds as your body accepted him. Stretching wider. Getting wetter. Bringing him closer to the edge with every breath.
“She’s doin’…so good f’me,” Joel told you, brainless.
His thumb drifted to your clit. He rubbed it gently. No sooner had he finished the first circle around that nub when your hips were stirring again—this time incensed.
“Daddy.”
“I know, baby. I know.”
Joel kissed the top of your head, thumb insistent. When his eyes met yours, he was surprised to find them wet this time. Tears pooling and streaking down to your temples while your body bounced gently beneath his thrusts. A whimper trembled out, and Joel slowed.
He could tell from that look you didn’t want him to stop, though. It just felt so good. So, instead of dropping his pace too much, Joel cupped your chin in one hand, and with the other, he kept thumbing at your clit. Humming.
“Poor thing’s never had something this big in ‘er, huh?”
You shook your head. Cried a little more.
Joel kissed the tears on one side, lips smiling as he did.
“I can tell, baby. But she’s taking it so well.”
“Y-Yeah?”
His hips sped up a little. The thrusts were still shallower than they normally would be, given your state, but they seemed to be working well enough. You winced again.
Joel kissed the other side of your face to take more tears.
“Uh-huh,” he answered, “Openin’ up real nice for daddy.”
It was like his words worked as well as his thumb on your clit. You whimpered again, lips parting a little wider now, and the sound that came out was as desperate and feverish and fuck-drunk as Joel had ever heard it.
“S-Say it again,” you pleaded.
“Say what?”
“That he’s…stretchin’ me open. Makin’ me his.”
The soft, slick resonance between your body and his seemed to amplify even more—you were getting wetter, and Joel’s thrusts all but shook the bed with their force.
His eyes darkened when he felt you tighten again.
“Yeah? You like hearin’ all the filthy fuckin’ things your daddy’s doing? The way he’s breakin’ you in for him?”
You nodded. Your throat constricted with a moan.
And, just when a fresh set of tears seemed to be close on the horizon, Joel lowered himself to you. He held you to his chest, hips working relentlessly, and he watched your face screw up in pleasure. A trace of pain surfaced again, but it was soothed with a kiss. Joel grinned against you.
Between your thighs, his cock was throbbing with a feeling just as big. He knew he couldn’t keep this up much longer. Hurting and aching and needing as you were, he had to make sure that you would cum first.
When his cock grazed a fleshy, sensitive patch inside your walls, he knew it wouldn’t take much. He went on:
“C’mon, sugar. Daddy’s split you open on his cock so nice, least you can do is cum for him. Can you do that?”
His nose brushed yours. His thrusts sped up. You nodded, quickly, and when he shifted in the bed with his thumb still on your clit and his lips and his stubble grazing your mouth with every push of himself, he felt it.
It was a small pulse, at first.
Joel thought you might be adjusting—clenching—again, when the lips that were trembling against his own parted more. Your arms wound around his neck, and suddenly the throb of your walls around his member got tighter and tighter and tighter. One more second and your cunt might’ve squeezed the hot, sticky seed right out of his body and flooded your insides with it, but then came release. The ‘o’ of your mouth let out a shriek, at last, and your body went soft around him, beneath him, whining in turn, ‘Daddy, daddy, please’ while the muscles once taut and unflinching gave him reprieve. Fluttering repeatedly.
Joel fucked you through it. He talked you through it.
He stroked your hair, and he held you tight. Called you his sweetheart, pretty thing, perfect girl, you’re doin’ so good f’me. Keep going. That’s right, cum all over daddy. He told you to take what you needed, and without another word, he felt just that. Your cunt spasmed around him, and you consumed every inch he gave and drank every drop of spend shooting out in thick spurts.
You fell boneless on the bed when all was said and done.
You looked happy, and that made Joel even happier.
He stroked your cheek, and you leaned into it, clearly drained while your gaze held his in a weak sort of look.
It was soft. Loving, even. It could’ve been romantic.
Then Joel’s hand slipped down to the nape of your neck again. Your muscles were limp, like all the rest of you, but somehow, he was able to hold you up. Tilt your chin a bit.
Make you peer down between your shaking legs, where his cock was still sheathed inside you—partly, anyway.
Your eyes widened. Joel grinned.
“You did great, baby. Ready for the other half of him?”
can y’all believe this image is what inspired this fic HA
it’s only Thursday i’m sorry 😔
#I WROTE THIS IN A FUGUE STATE LISTENING TO KEITH WHITLEY#IF IT DOESN���T MAKE SENSE IT’S PROBABLY JUST BC I’M SLEEP-DEPRIVED AND STUPID#joel miller smut#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller imagine#joel miller one shot#joel miller tlou#the last of us fic
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Imagined how would long it would take for someone to actually reach the moon, all those kids who grown up and their kids by danny the feral racoon museum tour guide to grown into space rocket enginers, weather tester for space flights, potentially astronauts(only quirkless were allowed for now because some people with mutant and other quirks can damaged the rocket ship) and all the rest to make a futuristic verison of NASA. It be 3XXX as the world watches the first quirkless man step on the moon on a live camera.
Everyone held their breath as the camera flickers a bit to see him put a nation state flag and a secondary flag with DF on the moon, and everyone at the space station will start crying, some sobbing, hugging each others.
All those grown people, their kids and some possible grandkids who work so hard for so long to achieve this brand newborn step for mankind to go into space.
And the one who the happiest would be a newly elderly man despise his young like look, would cry like a baby in the old but better built space museum. Middle age Izuku midoriya would be there patting Danny's back as he wiped his own tears.
Okay but? We of the DPxDC? Are COMPLETELY Sleeping on DPXBNHA?
And not even for the Main Plot Shenanigans!
Just?? It has ALL of DC's super powers? But MORE OF THEM. And like 80% of the population has um! Danny can?? Finally achieve his DREAM of being???
JUST SOME DUDE™!
Yeah, he's in Japan. That's a bit of a learning curve. And YEAH, there was a cataclysmic war like a few centuries back that sorta... fucked everybody up. No one wants to talk about it. There may be mass graves and Never Forget memorials. But?
On the SURFACE!
This place seems utopian!
No ghost hunters! Advanced technology! Robust social services*!
Wait... what was that asterisk? What do you mean "corrupt shadowy government organizations"? What do you MEAN "Immortal Supervillians"? NO SPACE PROGRAM!?!? AaaaaAAAAAAAAAAH?!?!? I'M IN HELL!!! This is ACTUALLY THE BAD PLACE, THIS IS HELL, OH GOD NOOOOOOO-!!!!!!
Cause see?
There are SO MANY REASONS he'd end up there?
Think about it! Wish that he lived somewhere his weird biology wouldn't exclude him from becoming an astronaut? In Quirks having Bnha Japan EVERYBODY has weird biology! Y'ain't special! You could TOTALLY be an astronaut!..... if we HAD those! We do not. Shut down that program during the Quirk Wars and never really started it again. (And somewhere, Desiree LAUGHS)
Or MAYBE? Things are getting a little hot on the ground? Bit TOO spicy. The Family Fenton and Friends have fallen back, behind the barely holding shields. Not even the Mansons considerable political maneuvering could stop the inevitably of human fear and blind unthinking hatred. Money can't buy everything, in the end. There is only ONE(1) way out.
Through the Zone.
Plan: Strangers In A Strange World is a go.
They're all Limnal enough to fake it. Sam with her plants. Tucker with his technology and persuasion. Jazz with her limited empathy. Their parents with their... well, weirdness. And with a touch of ghostly assisted meddling? Well, they've always BEEN there! Haven't they?
And that's not to MENTION the random 4 year olds with no control! JUST coming into their powers! With all those big emotions in tiny bodies? Startling events and tantrums? Villian attacks? What could THEY possibly hope to do to control or guide that fresh new power? It does what it does and the rest of us are just along for the ride!
If Danny happens to be minding his business and gets accidentally kidnapped by a VERY distraught 4 year old? Well, that's hardly the KIDS fault, now is it? They're FOUR! That is basically a toddler! Tiny child! They are upset, confused, and didn't mean to do ANYTHING. He's a hero. And Heros don't blame little kids from accidents, no matter HOW stressed it makes them.
No, the curse like a sailor INSIDE their head. Like an ADULT.
Just? Imagine~☆
The slow transition from *starry eyed shoujo sparkles* "This is SO COOL~!" to "huh, that's... kinda weird. And Sus. Weird Sus. Maybe nothing... oh! A distraction!" To "okay, this KEEPS happening, that was shady. You all saw that right? You realize that's not NORMAL, right? That that's fucked up? Not cool?" To "oh god, oh God, OH GOD! I'm in HELL! This is actually HELL! I'm trapped in HELL!!! WHAT THE FUC-"
Like? This kid LOVES space. LOVES the stars. And this is one of the few Superhero Cannon that SPECIFICALLY MENTIONS that IN CANNON? Thanks to Quirks? As in Superpowers? That VERY THING got fuckin SCRAPPED. Gutted. Consigned to be a relic of the past so they could all focus on punching each other Real Good.
He would weep BLOOD. Chew the WALLS. The LEVEL of unhinged this child would unleash? Not as Danny Phantom... but as DANNY J. FENTON? Beautiful. Vaguely psychotic. Definitely doing the Fenton Name proud. God, the NOISE HE WOULD MAKE would be inhuman and yet somehow? Come entirely from his human half.
They👏 Would👏 Hear👏 BOSS👏 MUSIC👏
I don't even know if he'd CARE about the main characters. They'd be tangential at best. The man would be in a one man war with I-Island over their lack of space program and hoarding of scientific progress. Probably living out of an abandoned building or forgotten subway station. Just? The MOST bedraggled, feral genius to ever haunt Japan.
As opposed to the REFINED feral genius. Who is Nedzu.
I bet Danny stands outside his school at one AM waving his scientific papers at a camera and YELLS. Like a deranged lunatic. Mismatched slippers and a "haven't slept in a week" crazed glint in his eyes.
He's Nedzu's new best friend. They GET each other.
And, yes, Nedzu COULD let him in... but it's faster to just let him yell and read the papers through the camera. Who CARES if they both seem insane! Let's shout about advanced physics and engineering at 1 am! Over the speakers!!! Oh? You need to physically SHOW me the notes? Well I COULD unlock the gates... OR just wait for you to finish scrambling up the walls like a feral Racoon, to then throw yourself OVER them.
Either, Or.
I'm just SAYING! We are SLEEPING on this! There is so, SO much fun to be had! Danny breaks rules and minds! His outrage over injustice and the complete lack of SPACE! His protection instincts going BUCK FUCKIN WILD. The INDESCRIBABLE hate boner he would have for Mr. "Lemme just rip parts of your soul out so I can collect your powers like pokemon cards" AfO.
There? Is SO MUCH, guys. SO MUCH!
@hdgnj @the-witchhunter @babbling-babull @hypewinter @nerdpoe @lolottes @dcxdpdabbles @mutable-manifestation
#dp x bnha#can you imagine Older Danny in this?#the true epitome of 'walk softly and carry a big stick'#he's grown into the classic Dan Phantom build#has had the meltdown about it-there's STILL a galaxy-shaped hole in a wall where he almost blew up#literally#and rolled into acceptance#because he's away from everything that could remind him of Dan#Danny isn't Dan and he can see that now#he looks like him#but the Dan he remembers would never let kids climb him to sit on his shoulders during story-time#he's Competent now. Has Credentials. Has a record of his contributions to the Museum and it's Sciences#he's his old man's pride and joy#his mom's Darling Baby Boy who's done so so well for himself#maybe the Fentons end up just...moving into the BNHA world permanently#and get to witness in real time how their boy has truly Flourished here#like...Old Man Fenton becomes well-know to Museum staff as the dad of Local Legend 'Mad Scientist Fenton'#he likes to come in frequently#does he DO anything? Nope#just sits on a bench with the biggest proudest grin Danny has ever seen on his Old Man's(affectionate) face#the poor Intern that saw the guy break into tears the first time wishes their dad was like this man#they get adopted by the Fentons :)#long post
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