#they both have adhd and get along great

[casually-eat-my-soul]

Okay so after the mountain breakup Geralt wants to apologize but he’s not sure how too. When he goes home for the winters he’s much more grumpy then usual and his brother and vesmir can smell his angsting. It take them nearly all winter to figure out why Geralt is so sad, but when they do they try and help.

All three of them try to figure out a way to have Geralt apologize. But they are Witchers and treat this in the same way they treat a monster hunt. They also don’t understand humans, and Geralt isn’t really that helpful as Jaskier is so different from humans.

When they finally come up with a decent plan, that has backups of course — “what if he escapes out a window instead of listening to Geralt?”

“Humans don’t jump out of widows lambert, they wouldn’t survive”

“Hmm no Jask jumped out of a three story widow when he heard that Valdo Marx was in the same building.”

“Fuck, we got to block out all the exits”

— Geralt sets out to apologize, and unbeknownst to him Lambert and Eskel follow him. They decide that since Geralt bard is well a bard, Geralt obviously needs to serenade him as he apologizes. (Ye old boombox)

So they buy cheap instruments and lay in wait. When Geralt finally starts to apologize it comes off awkward they jump in and start play horribly. They are both sing two different songs while they play hit cross buns. — “I fucked up and now I’m an angsty bastard without you, please fuck me again.”

“Lambert shut the fuck up, the lyric we agreed too was I’m deathly in love with you and being without you leaves me heart broken and berate” — It’s not really a surprise though lambert only followed to make fun of Geralt, while Eskel is a true romantic at heart.

They end up getting into a fist fight, in front of one mortified Geralt and dying laughing Jaskier. but while they are distracted with fighting each other Geralt pulls Jaskier aside and properly apologizes. It’s a sweet moment and they are both slightly crying — “I know that you may never forgive me, but I wish for you to travel with me again, to be better for you, to you.

“Geralt I forgave you two days after the mountain, I missed you too.” — Coen appears out of nowhere with a flower bouquet and gives it Jaskier and claims it’s from Geralt. He also kisses Jaskier hand before stepping away. Geralt nearly decks him. Jaskier makes a joke about swooning over Coen, so Geralt in a fit of confidence kisses him.

Next winter when Geralt brings Jaskier to the keep, they roast his ass. There isn’t a day that goes by without lambert or Eskel bringing up how angsty Geralt was last winter. Jokes on them they don’t have someone like Jaskier to wake up too.

[23sanguinity]

Why is it that I’m always the most dysphoric when my sensory issues are the worst I had to force myself to take off my binder and I can’t put on a sweater because I’ll overheat immediately and god I want to kill my uncle

[n3kk1tty]

The Lost Boys Fandom Sound Off

There are a lot of amazing and talented people in this community on tumblr and I'm happy to point people to and learn about more people who exist in this wonderful place along with me. To make it easier for others to consume copious amounts of fan content I hope to make and add to this list to make it easier to track people.

If I miss anyone or you want to be added please leave a message on the post.

Writer's:

@tac-the-unseen : Absolutely phenomenal imagines. If you're looking for short and sweet imagines they are the place I usually go to.

@ria-coolgirl : Really friendly always supportive. Posts written questions or ideas.

@bubblegumbarbie33 : Funny quote posts that make me sit there day dreaming of new stuff.

@sad-ghost-of-garbage : Makes that good sweet sweet angst.

@lostbetweenvampiresandmusic : Lots of poly content.

@misslavenderlady : There fanfics are so well crafted and who can't appreciate amazing page set up.

@themarginalthinker : The best drabbles

@britany1997 : Makes awesome poly content and it's so easy to get lost in there fics.

@sunkendreams :

@charlizekkelly :

@luv4fandoms :

@darlingverse :

@berd-alert : amazing oneshots. 10/10 would reread repeatedly

@theyreonlynoodlesmike : Such amazing amount of lost boy variety content and a huge selection of top quality content.

@n30nwrites : Has x male reader content and good spicy writing posts.

@i-heart-slashers : Story scene set up is top notch

@redamancy-writes : Delicious angst and variety

@writinginatree : Platonic Fic and Romantic

@chubbyreaderchan : Fixed focused on chubby reader

@ebony-blood : Detailed yet more bitesized requests for the casual fast paced reader.

( recommended list by: @dustofbrokenheart , I took the direct dialogue and recommendations from their reply post to the list )

@thoushallnotfall especially for the "Blood and Water" and "Prey" series but all of Rachel's stuff is great!

@brideofcthulhu10 who was one of the first writers I found for tlb here on tumblr.

@datsrightbby shak has a bunch of fics and headcanon/preference posts.

@garlicdontwork has a few series that include thompson!reader and frog!reader.

@peacepey did a lot of good request work back in the day.

@monsterfuneral wrote some memorable poly imagines. (I believe violet's main account is now @grudgecollector.)

@tinywritinghana has a few series, as well as lots of one shots. A favorite of mine is the "Student's Guide to Raising the Dead" series!

@kurt-nightcrawler cara has fics for both the lost boys and a lost girls project she started at one point.

@dustofbrokenheart : who is another talented writer in the fandom who helped me tremendously with adding valuable members in the community to the sound off page. I couldn't have done it without them.

(end of recommendation list this portion)

@chevvsgotanumbrellatattoo : Have 2 wonderful fics of and trying their hand at lost boys drabbles. Undoubtedly they will be making even more amazing writing content in the future.

@marnievanhelsing: AO3 writer. Has some pretty funny chaotic Tlb head cannons posts that include the frog brothers. Up and coming in the fandom

Artists:

@n3kk1tty : I qualify for artist/ writer but my art has more variety as I focus most of my writing on my lost boy Au / requests.

@popironrye : There art is so colorful and eye popping I always love seeing it on my feed.

@walmart-icarus : Also a writer. Such a cute style of art.

@hypocriticaltypwriter : Truly amazing person in community with such a bouncy art style. Their fan kids are amazing and give everyone baby fever. Also writes and roleplays.

@midnight-in-santa-carla : Wonderful realistic artstyle with vibrant colors.

@gryphonsthing : sweet cute artstyle that's always refreshing to see on my feed.

@starlahuskyz : OMG ID EAT THERE ART IF I COULD

@persephone-s-moon : Amazing muscle shading / lighting.

@fleouriarts : Incredible moody / stylistic art that uses color in a eye catching manner my ADHD brain can't describe.

( recommended list by: @dustofbrokenheart , I took the direct dialogue and recommendations from their reply post to the list )

@witch-lass her drawing style is super cute and recognizable!

@garnetgh0st candy made my favorite moodboards back in the day. There's a seasons, mamma mia, and disney prince series among others. (I count moodboards in art category!)

@thornthehellhound he makes both funny and really pretty art pieces. Very talented!

(end of recommendation list this portion)

Roleplayers:

( I personally don't roleplay at all in the fandom but I know there's people who do and love to do so. I mostly compiled this list using @hypocriticaltypwriter 's recommendation list they have on their blog and thought putting it on the main fandom track sheet to help push the rp blogs center stage. I'm sorry I can't give much of a review. )

@blog4horror : gives great requests

@marko-boy

@paulie-lostboy

I've reached tumblers max tag list. Which who even knew was a thing. I'll continue on my quest in the post reblogged from this one.

[brendaareiss]

CAL AND ANDRE HEADCANONS! Finally! I feel like there's some I have already said b4, but idk. Enjoy!

⚠️Triggers⚠️: SA, SH

- Andre furrowed his brows when he was concentrated, Cal poked his tongue out

- Andre was actually a great student. That's why most of the people didn't like him either, whether being because of envy or because they saw him as a nerd and annoying. But bro had +A on everything

- Cal on the other hand, was pathetic at studies. His best ever grade was a C

- They didn't actually hold hands most of the time, just intertwine pinkies unconsciously

-Cal always followed andre everywhere. It was not even a conscious act.

- They both talked shit abt their siblings

- Andre=bpd + psicopathy

- Cal= adhd + depression (duh).

- Andre paid attention on the smallest details and had rlly good memory. Like, something stupid Cal said years ago, andre remembered it like it was yesterday. Or he knew what things Cal liked or not, even if Cal hasn't told him, he knew it because he paid attention to what Cal was doing

- Cal was a chronic nail biter. Rachel tried putting nail polish on him to make it better, because Cal reached the point where his whole finger was covered in blood

-Cal has had many addictions in his life. It was all because his depression, he couldn't get happiness (dopamine) in anything in his life so he tried to get it somewhere else. That's why he started doing weed at a young age, well, until the possession charge. After that, he went straight to cutting. It wasn't as good as to get high, but at least it worked and wasn't illegal. He used to get blackout drunk too, trying to get dopamine from where he could.

- U can't tell me they didn't explore each other's bodies. Ofc they did (I like to think they would refer to that as "favors"), but they never rlly knew what the fuck they were. Were they boyfriends? Were they just friends with benefits? That's actually where the term "the army of two" appeared, trying to give what they had a tag or a "name". But they knew rlly well they weren't just friends. They knew each other too much, they were too similar and too connected to be just friends.

- Cal was sa'd from when he was 7 years old until he was 14 by his cousin, who was 8 years older than him. He never told anything to anyone, not even Andre, but he eventually figured it out. He was paranoid and very protective with his siblings (even though he didn't like them, it doesn't mean that they weren't siblings, Cal cared for them a lot), making sure his cousin NEVER approached them. And if someone older talked to them he would get rlly anxious and freaked out.

- Andre always cared too much about Cal. He knew the state of Cal's mental health and physical health (anemic ass) so he always was there for him. And I like to think not only andre, but his family too. Feeding him until Cal couldn't physically bring the fork to his mouth (I'm sure Andre's mom would be the one to say: "Cal, you have to eat more! You're so thin!")

- Andre was not always seen with the Gabriel's (because Cal's sister HATES andre with all her guts) but Calvin was ALWAYS seen with the kriegman's. Andre's dad always knew that when he mentioned "family vacation/trip", Cal was tagging along.

-Cal learned to stay calm when Andre had his bpd splits (extreme anger most of the time). There was a time when he actually felt rlly bad when Andre said what things to him or just screamed and pushed him around, but as time passed, he learned it was just another normal thing on Andre. That's why in the car scene, he at first didn't take him seriously, he then shut the fuck up and tried to get out of the situation as quickly as he could afterwards.

- Andre never really knew what the fuck was wrong with him. He wasn't like Cal, he didn't get diagnosed with shit and didn't even went to a psychologist. He thought he was just really aggressive and nothing more.

- Andre was low-key an alcoholic. He never got blackout drunk though

- The only thing Andre didn't clean, was his car. Maybe once in a month (or a week if there where a lot of empty beer cans in the back seats)

- Cal rlly liked sour candies.

- Andre slept A LOT.

- idk if I said this b4 but Andre's hand was always on Cal's thigh while he drove

- most of their hangouts were sleepovers. They seriously couldn't live without each other

- OF COURSE the reason why andre didn't like Rachel it's because he was EXTREMELY jealous of her. He felt like she was taking Cal away from him. He also felt that she talked shit about Cal when he wasn't there. The night Cal ditched Rachel for him, Andre's ego was 100% fueled

- Andre had migraines. Yeah. He didn't throw up though

- Following, andre NEVER puked. Like, he probably just threw up 1 time in his life. Cal on the other hand, every time he got sick, he vomited.

-Cal ALWAYS forgot his things EVERYWHERE. His parents didn't even make him his own keys, because they knew Cal would probably lose them too.

- As kids, Cal adored sharks and Andre lions and bears. (Cal adored sharks all his life though)

- Andre's grandparents who lived in Germany, had a bigass house with a garden. They had ALSO, a bigass dog. Of course Andre as a kid spent most of the time in the garden, playing with his brother and the dog.

- The only thing that made Andre calm down when he was angry, was changing the situation, making him forget about it, talking about another thing or doing another thing that isn't related to the reason he's mad. Distract him and make him forget why he was mad in the first place.

[carooosa]

Enchanting Distractions

Summary: Tav (reader) has ADHD/is bad at setting boundaries when it comes to their party members. Astarion comforts them.

Word count: 3.5k

A/N: Semi-canon compliant, takes place after the tiefling party and literally right before entering Act 2. I barely proofread it so sorry in advance. I was feeling particularly upset at myself today and so this is what I wrote up.

The days had been starting to blur together as you made your way through the mountain pass. Tomorrow your party would step into the shadow-cursed lands, so it was decided to set up camp early for the night to ensure that everyone was well-rested and prepared. Tension ran through the camp, everyone on edge with the possibility of finding the cause of the tadpoles. Whatever happens tomorrow could very well be the end of your journey.

As everyone set up their tents, you began to look through your supplies, separating potions, arrows, and scrolls into piles to give to your companions. While organizing everything, the sound of Lae’zel and Shadowheart bickering caused you to lift your head. They had never gotten along since the beginning of this tadpole mess but after the Githyanki Creche their hatred for each other seemed to amplify.

“I would say that I’m surprised that machine was unable to get rid of the tadpoles, but then again, I wouldn’t expect gith to know what they were doing,” Shadowheart had taunted Lae’zel.

“The zaith'isk was tampered with! Githyanki technology is far beyond your understanding, and if you had something other than a tadpole in your brain, you would realize the mistake in your words,” Lae’zel shot back. She turned to herself before saying, “Useless istik, mindlessly following a false god”

“What did you just say?” Shadowheart said as she readied herself to attack.

“Your ‘goddess’ ordered you to steal a precious artifact from my people, and yet knowing that does not change your unwavering belief. A goblin has more integrity than you,” Lae’zel said as she continued to walk away.

“Shar is a real goddess, unlike the githyanki’s petty attempt at a goddess, Vlaakith,” Shadowheart yells as she begins to sprint toward Lae’zel. The fighter had already pulled out her sword and the clashing of metal rang through the air. You sighed, standing up from the mess that laid out before you, and ran towards the fight. Before you could intervene, Karlach had taken her great axe and held it out in between the two aggressors before berating them.

“For fuck’s sake guys, the whole point of setting up camp early was to rest for tomorrow, not argue and waste our energy on dumb fights.” As Karlach said this, Shadowheart cast gust of wind to push her opponent back, accidentally hitting Karlach in the crossfire. She had succeeded at causing Lae’zel to lose her grip on her sword but had caused that sword to slash into Karlach’s leg. The tiefling groaned as she kneeled to the ground, clutching her thigh.

You ran back to your bag and turned it upside down, dumping all the contents onto the piles you had started to make earlier, and rummaged through your items until you found a healing potion and some fire-resistant bandages. When you ran over to Karlach to heal her, Wyll was already yelling at the two women who had caused an unnecessary injury.

“Your recklessness has caused this bloodshed!” he sounded exasperated as you handed Karlach the potion, unraveling the bandages and starting to dress her wound, careful to not burn yourself in the process. “You both are distracted by your own prejudices and disdain for each other that the thought you may be hurting others in the process never crossed your minds. So caught up in yourselves, you have yet to see the irony of the words you throw at each other.”

Wyll continued his lecture as you focus on Karlach, watching her toss aside the empty potion bottle. “Thanks, soldier,” she says with a weak smile. She pushes herself off of the ground, causing Wyll to pause his lecture and rush to her side. “I’m fine, just gonna head to bed early,” she says while sidestepping past him.

You take a breath and start to think of how to address the situation that just happened when suddenly, Gale is by your side, anxiously fumbling with his hands. Realization overcame you and you tried to recall the last time you had given the wizard an enchanted item to consume the magic from. 

“I know now might not be the best time,” he starts, “but there really never is a good time nowadays, is there?” he finishes with a chuckle to himself.

“I should have an enchanted ring in my bag—“ you stop when you glance back at your backpack, contents strewn across the ground.

“I’ll leave you to it, then,” Gale says quickly. “Dinner isn’t going to cook itself!” He makes his way to his tent and you drag your feet back to your backpack, dreading the mess you’ll have to clean up. Sifting through the items, you create another pile of the things you already looked through. Focused on organizing, you don’t hear Astarion sneak up on you.

“My my, these are quite the… piles you have here,” he says while crouching down across from you. “What’s with all these arrows and grenades? Have you decided to try your hand in ranged combat? Because if so,” he pauses, crimson red eyes staring into your soul, “I’d be more than happy to give you some private lessons.” He bares his teeth, his fangs glistening. You’re tempted to take him up on the offer before you remember why you got those items in the first place.

“Oh, those aren’t for me. I’ve been picking up stuff here and there, and I figured before heading out tomorrow I’d give some to everyone. I was actually organizing everything,” you say, completely forgetting that you were looking for a ring, “and I was going to try and figure out what would be best for everyone to have, but since you’re here, you can pick whatever you want.”

“I can choose anything here?” Astarion asks with a smirk. You nod your head and he responds by picking up your hand and giving it a kiss on the palm, “Then I pick you, my dear.”

Your cheeks flush red as you stutter out a response. “That’s not what I meant and you know it!” Astarion had been teasing you a lot more lately, and while you didn’t mind, it had proven to be an extra distraction. 

He chuckled at your pout, caressing your face with his other hand, his thumb pressing down on your lower lip. You both stare at each other for a moment, before he sighs and brings his hands back to his side. “Well, if I can’t have you I guess I need to figure something else out.” He scans over the pile and picks up a necklace.

“Wait, not that,” you say while snatching the jewelry away from him. “That can restore one of Shadowheart’s spells, I should go give that to her.” You stand up and run off to find the cleric, not noticing the disgruntled look Astarion has on his face. He sighs and looks down at the clutter, beginning to sift through the items.

While making your way to Shadowheart’s tent, you hear Halsin comfort a whining Scratch. “There, there, I’m sure we will retreive it soon enough,” the druid says while gently petting the dog. “Ah, Tav, could I bother you for a moment? Scratch seems to have lost his ball in a burrow and neither of us can reach it. Would mind seeing if you can grab it?”

Scratch runs up to you and paces around you in circles before you lean down to him, “Of course I’ll help you out, buddy.” Without thinking, you set the necklace on a nearby rock, crouching down to the burrow and searching for the ball. In the shadows you spot it, deep inside the tunnel, and you reach your arm in. 

Your fingers are barely able to reach the toy, and you’re about to maneuver the ball out when Gale speaks. “Tav, I’m terribly sorry to ask again, but were you able to find the enchanted ring perchance?” The ball rolls out of your grasp, and you let out a long sigh before retracting your arm.

“Sorry, Gale, I got distracted. As soon as I get this ball out for Scratch I’ll go and get it for you.” Content with that answer he nods and walks off. Reaching your hand back into the hole, you push yourself against the ground, the extra leverage closing the distance between your hand and the toy. You let out a breath before throwing the ball, Scratch bounding after it.

“Thank you, Tav!” Halsin says as he runs after the dog.

Walking back to where Astarion sits rummaging through your things, Wyll interrupts you. “Tav, do you by chance have a fire resistance potion? I was wanting to give Karlach these flowers to cheer her up,” he says, holding the bouquet in front of him sheepishly. Although Wyll and Karlach had been foes in Avernus, they’re relationship was slowly blossoming into a gentle romance.

“That’s very sweet of you, Wyll. I should have one in my stuff.” You both head over to the piles of items that Astarion had started to organize. It would be nice to have someone think about me like Wyll thinks about Karlach, you ponder as you bend down next to Astarion, grabbing the fire resistance potion that sat buried within the clutter. “Here you go,” you hand Wyll the potion, “I think those will make her very happy.”

Wyll says a quick thanks as he opens the potion with his teeth, hastily pouring the contents over the bouquet and heading off to Karlach’s tent. Clearing his throat, Astarion asks “Did Shadowheart enjoy your gift?” he says with a slight frown and a twinge of annoyance in his voice.

“My what?”

He stares at you for a second, before elaborating, “The necklace? The one that you oh so rudely snatched from my hands.” He watches as your face scrunches up tightly trying to remember what he’s talking about before you gasp.

“The necklace!”

“Yes, the necklace,” he sighs.

“Where did I put it?” you say as you frantically pat down your pockets.

Astarion starts to tease you again, “Really, darling, how could you misplace something like that? I thought that necklace was important after you had yanked it out of my hand and ran off to Shadowheart.” He’s chuckling to himself when he notices the genuine frustration that is starting to seep off of you.

“I just had it. I was holding it in my hand. Where could I have put it?” you mutter to yourself, your breath starting to quicken. Dread creeps through your chest as you begin to mentally retrace your steps. “Think, dammit, think!” Tears start to form in the corners of your eyes, a lump taking place in the back of your throat. Astarion stood up and reached his hand tentatively towards yours, squeezing it gently to try and bring you back to the present.

Gale had made his way back over to you, seeing that you were near your things. “I hate to interrupt this touching moment, but I really do need that ring if you have it,” He says while clutching his chest. Astarion glares daggers at the wizard who is either oblivious or purposely ignoring your stress, but you don’t notice as your mind has drifted off.

Right, you think to yourself, I came over here to look for the ring. Without saying a word, you push away Astarion’s hand and sink to the ground, aimlessly pushing around everything trying to find the ring. Astarion studies you, the way your hands seem to be searching for the relic while your eyes glaze over and stare at nothing, until your hand brushes over the small golden circle and you grasp it firmly. You sigh and recollect yourself before turning around and jumping up to Gale, handing him the ring with a forced smile and laugh. “Sorry for the delay! I’ve been so forgetful lately.”

He takes the ring from your hand, clutching it tightly while absorbing the magic into his chest. When he opens his hand, the ring is broken into two. “Ah, apologies. Dinner should be finished soon. Thanks again,” he says with a bow before leaving.

You sigh before returning to the pile, starting to organize it once again. From the outside, people would assume that you’re just forgetful and easily distracted, most even finding your frantic and hectic demeanor cute. You can’t help but feel like a burden, requiring constant reminders to stay on task, feeling like you need to rely on others instead of yourself. It wasn’t for a lack of trying, either, but no matter how many times you repeated tasks to yourself, how many times you had written down what needs to be done, how many times you had try to will focus into your mind, nothing changed. It's always been like this, and now with the stress of the unknown ahead, you’ve been getting distracted more.

Astarion watches you, determined to organize the mess on the ground. When he first met you, you had brushed off your forgetfulness and laughed along with anyone who had made a joke at your expense. It had annoyed him to no end when you would walk into the same room, multiple times, that you had just looted. This aloofness only seemed to grow after you both had come to an agreement that Astarion could drink your blood in order to satiate his thirst, the only side affect being your increased mind-wandering.

After another 30 minutes of watching you return to the same room over and over to loot, he had decided that you both would search the rooms together, if nothing else to lessen the time it took at each town. He didn’t expect that during the extra, private time you both were now spending together he would begin to grow fond of you. While he would be working on a lock of a chest, you would grab a book and immediately become immersed in it. At first, he would use this time to pocket the most valuable items found in whatever container he had just opened, but as time went on, he had started to ask you questions about what you were reading.

It had caught him off guard when you looked up at him with excitement in your eyes as you explained the gossip in the diary you found, and he couldn’t help but become intrigued himself. Quickly, a new routine had started: while Astarion would loot and lockpick whatever he could get his hands on, you would find diaries, notes, and books to read outloud. He would respond to the especially vulgar and outlandish things you would recite with theatrical gasps and awes. One time, you had stumbled across a particularly sad letter from a person who begged their lover to wait for them, only for their lover to respond that they had never returned. A choked sob had escaped your lips when you finished the letter, and Astarion had quickly called you over to distract you.

“It’s about time that you learn how to use one of these,” he said while he pushed a lockpick into your hands. “If you’re going to stare at me while I do all the work, you may as well get something out of it.” He had been joking, but you hadn’t taken it that way. A wave a guilt and embarrassment had washed over you as you resolved to force yourself to learn what he was teaching you. It was all in vain, however, as every ten minutes when he would ask you to demonstrate, your hands would clam up and your mind would go blank.

“Darling, is it really that hard to focus? Or am I just that distracting, hm?” he had joked.

You wouldn’t look into his eyes, instead you had begun to fumble with the lockpick in your hands. “I’m sorry,” you had whispered, “I’m really trying.”

You had expected him to berate you or to even make a joke about how useless you were, but instead he had sighed and positioned himself behind you, placing his hands over yours as he talked you through the steps, yet again, of lockpicking. When you had heard the final click of the lock, you quickly turned to look at the man who had helped you. Inches away from each other’s faces, he smiled softly and brought one of his hands up to your cheek as he placed a gentle kiss on your temple.

“See? You can focus,” he had said while giving you a tight squeeze.

The sound of your sigh brought him back to the present, and he stared at you for a moment before asking, “Do you want me to go and look for the necklace while you do this?” You stop moving things around and just sit there, defeated. The necklace had completely slipped your mind, just like the ring. Your body begins to shake as tears run down your cheek. Astarion slowly kneels next to you, grabbing the potions and arrows from your hand and setting them off to the side. “Hey, it’s alright. Shh-shh-shh, there’s no need to ruin that beautiful face of yours.”

You start to sob quietly. Why was this so difficult for you? You were able to talk your way out of situations, fight enemies with ease, and coordinate a fighting strategy that used everyone to the best of their abilities, yet you were unable to do such simple things. You draw your hands to your eyes, pressing harshly into them to try and stop the tears that fall out. Astarion gingerly moves his arms around you in a hug, as gentle as he can muster as to not startle you. He squeezes you tightly and you stay like that for a while, before you’re able to croak out a simple question that leaves a pain in his chest.

“What’s wrong with me?” You move your hands away from your face and turn your head to look at him, expecting to see frustration in his eyes but instead finding something softer. It looks as if he’s genuinely concerned. 

“There’s nothing wrong with you, Tav,” he says quietly, barely above a whisper.

“Then why,” you say with trembling words, “why can’t I do such simple things? Why is it so difficult for me to remember what I’m doing, to not get distracted?”

Astarion sighs as he looks at you with his big, round eyes. “You are capable of much more than you know, my sweet. You were designated the leader for a reason. You’re brave, witty, and above all else, kind. You are so sickenly kind and patient with everyone, yet you don’t afford yourself the same grace,” he says as he rubs circles into your back. “You’ve been kind to those that don’t deserve it, but you’re never kind to yourself.”

“Thank you,” you reply meekly. You hated crying in front of your companions, but you found that you didn’t mind being comforted by Astarion.

“Besides, darling,” the vampire joked,” It’s hardly your fault that you keep getting distracted when there are six adult children who need constant supervision.”

“Don’t you mean seven?”

He pulled away from you with a gasp. “I think I am more than capable of taking care of myself, thank you very much.”

“Oh, if that’s the case, you don’t need to see me for blood anymore then, right?” you teased.

Astarion squinted at you before his eyes softened and he pulled you into his arms again. You both sat like that for a while before he spoke, barely above a whisper, “I don’t only need you for blood.” Before you can respond, Gale’s call to dinner causes Astarion to push you up. “Go on, enjoy dinner.” You start to protest and gesture to the mess that still needs to be cleaned up before he cuts you off, “I’ll take care of it.” As he begins to sort through the items, he catches your eye before you leave. 

“I hope you know that I’m still expecting to see you tonight,” he says with a sultry voice. If you hadn’t gotten closer recently, you would take what he says at face value, a meaningless flirt to rile you up. But beneath his smirk you can see a hint of sadness in his eyes.

It will need to wait for another time as your stomach grumbles, and you remember that you had forgotten to eat lunch that day. You say a quick thank-you before running off to join the rest of the party, feeling more at ease about the adventure that lay before you.

[pumpkinbxtch]

.・゜✭・. the code for “i like you”

— leo valdez x daughter of athena!reader

Summary: Leo likes you so much that when he has the dream opportunity to get close to you, he expresses his feelings to you, in Morse code, accidentally.

Warnings: swear words?? yeah, but like three.

A/N: English is not my first language, so sorry if it's bad.

A/N: I had so much fun doing this, i relived primary school when i used morse code to make love letters, ew. Btw enjoy.

Leo was terribly attracted to you and you, as expected, went completely oblivious about it. The boy had practically tried everything possible to get close to you; He tried to participate in the same practices as you, walking where you were or talking to those you were friends with, but he just couldn't get it.

The only thing that play in his favor was that they were both leaders of their respective cabins. So when you talked about the planes your cabin had to increase camp security during one of your regular meetings Leo immediately pulled out a favor and volunteered to help (although the guy had no choice anyway, literally his cabin was the only one that could make it)

Chiron didn't object and ended up emphasizing that the two of you would mainly have to work side by side, while he winked at the son of Hephaestus, and Leo wondered if his intentions were really that obvious. Whatever, he was happy.

— That's great, have fun, idiots — Clarisse said in a mocking tone. She patted you on the back and winked.

» Does everyone have eye problems today? « You wondered, but didn't give it much thought. You looked at Leo, and he smiled exaggeratedly at you.

You hadn't paid much attention to the guy, but of course you had him in located: he was a trouble-maker, talented, with very nice hair, in addition, - and gods forbid that anyone else should know - his jokes did seem funny to you as difference from the opinion of others. But you didn't give him many detours and smiled kindly, hiding your desire to giggle.

— See you in a bit, Valdez. I'll go get the plans. —  and you left his sight again, leaving him alone in The Big House. Leo would have preferred to accompany you, but he believed that he had already spent his good luck bonus for the day, so he decided not to press. Chiron put a hand on his shoulder and sighed dreamily.

— The sweet and bitter pain of love — The centaur patted his shoulder a few more times and trotted into the house.

An hour later, Leo had tried to make bunker 9 as presentable as possible for your arrival. But the accumulated junk of several weeks was difficult to hide under a rug, so he just arranged it so that it would not get in the way and cleaned it the tables. In the name of Hephaestus, he was a nervous wreck.

By the time you crossed the door, he wanted to bury himself along with the scrap metal under his work table.

On the other hand, for you, it was impressive. Of course, you were not unfamiliar with the bunker, but looking closely at all of Leo's projects that he had in progress stimulated your brain in the same way that the largest candy store would do for third year old. You forced to keep your mouth closed and walked with the papers towards Leo, who was sitting on the other side of the huge blueprint table.

He looked apparently uncomfortable, and you did not blame him, you assumed that entering the workshop of a son of Hephaestus where his most precious creations are kept was the equivalent of grabbing Clarisse's favorite weapon to play badminton. You preferred to get to the point by spreading out the plans and go straight to the explanation of them.

Everything was fine, until after a while, Leo began to make anxious movements that did nothing but spread the feeling towards you. At first the knocking on the table while you were telling him the plans seemed meaningless to you, until you managed to distinguish a certain rhythm in them, then a hidden meaning. Your mind split in two, and you continued listening carefully while you continued explaining. How? ADHD.

Two knocks in a row, a silence, a tap and a long tap… Was that Morse code?

(.. / .-.. .. -.- /) I like…

You finally figured it out.

(.. / .-.. .. -.-/) I like…

He repeated. It was definitely Morse code.

But what did he like? Your plans?

That last thought made you falter in the conversation, and you stuttered, Leo placed his brown eyes on you attentively and touched the code again.

(.. / .-.. .. -.-/) I like (-.-- --- ..-) You

You blinked dumbfounded as you bumbled and tried to put your sentence together to return to the conversation about the security system without much success, Leo frowned softly probably wondering if you had gone crazy already. But that didn't matter because at the same moment his knuckles collided again against the wooden table making you lose total concentration.

(.. / .-.. .. -.- . / -.-- --- ..-) I like you

You were probably wondering if he was doing it on purpose or consciously, but the answer was no, Leo was a total idiot watching you explain plans and strategies. For him, it was easily like being in paradise, but his emotion tended to show itself involuntarily, and in this case, his knuckles began to encode messages that his brain spun while you continued babbling.

It was only when you stopped talking and gave him a big look of confusion that he stopped.

His blood ran cold. What had he done wrong?

—Leo? — you asked incredulously with narrowed eyes.

—Yes?—  He mumbled nervously and then laughed. Leo cursed his anxious reflexes. — I'm listening, it's just a lot, and it's hard for me, you know what attention deficit is like.— He let out another laugh and his cheeks began to burn. He was just saying stupid things. 

You shook your head and sat down.

—I know Morse code too, you know? We use it a lot in combat.

Leo's blood ran cold for the second time, and he thought he would burst into flames at the same time, inconsistent but possible.

— I don't think so.

And he gave himself a mental slap. Not only had he just told the girl he liked that Leo didn't think she knew Morse code, but to a daughter of Athena. ATHENA. Leo forced himself to deliver another slap.

But the question was now what the fuck had he said in Morse code? Then he heard you clinking the cap of a pen against the table.

(.. / .-.. .. -.- . / -.-- --- ..-) I like you

Shit.

—Wasn't that Morse code? You've been playing it since we were going through the forest plane.

The son of Hephaestus jumped from his chair and stiffened, beginning to babble.

— Me, no, it's just that sometimes I, no, my mom-

—Just tell me if it was true or not.

— YEAH! — Leo pressed his eyes and covered himself with his hands, seconds later a small flame caught fire above his head.

You didn't want to show your shock or how much your heart had raced, but you also got up from your chair and walked towards him. Leo was still in the same position, which almost made you laugh, but you preferred to direct your attention to the flame that was flickering in his hair. You raised your hand over him and tried to pat it out, trying not to get tangled in his curls. By the time you extinguished the flame, he was looking at you like you had just kicked his bronze dragon.

His eyes had widened in a way that you considered unnatural, this time you did let out the laugh. You cleared your throat and took a step back.

— An original way of expressing it, I have to admit — you said still with a playful look.

The boy blushed more, if that was possible.

— Sorry, I didn't want to bother you…

You frowned and shook your head.

— No, no, what I mean is… — You cleared your throat. Now you were nervous, your words would become more clumsy, so you picked up the pen cap again to knock it on the table:

.- ... -.- / -- . / ..-. --- .-. / .- / -.. .- - . (Ask me for a date)

Leo went over each tap and looked at you surprised.

You raised your hand asking for time and played one last word.

..-. --- --- .-.. (Fool)

And you smiled, satisfied that you had done it quickly, but even more so that the boy you had suggested going out with you had encoded the message in record time. How you liked smart boys!

Leo leaned towards you with a self-righteous smile, clearly feeling victorious. Yes, there was also the troublemaker, in total, he was a kind of mad genius.

—So, ma'am, would you go out with me?

— I'll see — You said as you picked up your plans. His smile faded and he began to stammer buts. — See you at dinner, Leo.

You smiled and made your way out of the bunker. Clearly, you would accept, but you would let Leo try a little harder.

[rumble-aint-a-rumble-without-me]

Hi :) I was wondering if you could do Poly Dallas and sodapop hcs? with a reader if you're comfortable with it, of course. I think it would be a funny dynamic

This was written in my anatomy class (can you tell that I don’t pay attention in anatomy?) so I’m gonna give @a-person-who-didn’t-want-to-be-here a big huge thank you for helping me out <4

Anyway!

There’s a really complicated getting together story here? I just haven’t figured it out quite yet, so I’m gonna leave that to you guys to think up cause there’s a few ideas swirling around my head, I just haven’t nailed anything down because I’m really not in love with any of my thoughts

But you’ve got the best of both worlds going on for you! A nice golden retriever boyfriend and a boyfriend who’s more of a german shepherd/rottweiler/doberman type-

Life is good!

Both of these boys run warm and they can both be very very handsy, made worse by the fact that they are both very very much in love with you

Jealousy is sort of wonky here? Cause Dally’s very loudly jealous, but Sodapop’s jealousy comes off as him acting more closed-off and withdrawn, he just kinda pulls away when you hang too much with Dallas

Also, before we get any further along, Sandy and Sylvia don’t exist here because I’m in charge and I make the rules :)

Parties! You’re always being dragged out to parties, whether it’s a drag race and you’re on Sodapop’s arm, or a late night party at Buck’s bar where Dally keeps you tucked to his side all night long

You’ve got the whole freaking gang honestly, the whole crew wrapped around your finger-

Dating Dally gets you Johnny in an instant, dating Sodapop gets you Pony, Dare, and Steve- the only one left is Two-Bit but ya know, he’s a good enough guy, he’s probably on your side in all this anyhow-

You’re at the DX a lot, just hanging around the pumps and the garage and the register while Soda’s at work (you definitely skip school to go see him, Dally picks you up and you guys waste the day over at the gas station)

Sodapop sneaking out to meet you and Dally down at Buck’s because there’s a party tonight and honestly he doesn’t care if Darry kills him for being at the Merrill’s establishment, he hasn’t seen you all week long-

Of course of course, you’re wearing Dally’s ring and when you and Sodapop are holding hands, he likes to twist it around your finger and fiddle with it

Dally asks him what he’s doing, asks if Sodapop’s trying to take it off as if he’s got some sort of problem with you wearing somebody else’s ring but Soda just kinda shrugs and says he likes fooling with it

Baby boy’s got no problem other than ADHD and he likes to mess with things 🤷

Patching them up after a rumble is such an obnoxious task- Dally’s whining about broken ribs and how he can barely breath and Soda’s slouched on the floor, holding an ice pack to his face and asking if you’ll still love him if he’s got a black eye

Suggestion? Try and keep them close together in this situation ^^ make them sit near each other, because they both want attention and if you’ve got to run back and forth across the living room every two seconds, no one’s going to be happy-

You spend a lot of time sitting in Dallas’ lap and you spend a lot of time holding Soda’s hand, sometimes these happen at the same time-

Imma say it, you’re not sharing a bed with both of them unless you’re hurt or sick because both of these boys are like portable space heaters and no matter how cold you may be, these human furnaces will make you feel like you’re being slowly cooked because they sandwich you between them

PET NAMES PET NAMES PET NAMES

Doll, baby, honey, sugar, sweetheart, babe….

Just…you’re gonna forget you actually have a name because they never call you by your actual name-

You’re dating two highschool dropouts, how do you feel about that?

Joking, joking, I know you feel wonderful, as you should, because you’re going with two great guys!!

There’s like?

A betting pool going around?

Because no one can figure out who you’re going out with (other than the gang of course)

And Sodapop and Dallas do nothing to help you out- they purposefully make it even worse-

You go to a party with Sodapop, hanging off his arm, and at the end of the night, you’re going home with Dally, spending your night in his room at Buck’s

You’re sitting on the DX counter (you don’t even work there but you have free reign of the place, let’s be real) and you’ve got Dally’s medal around your neck, Dal himself is off in reform and you and Sodapop are planning a date <3

One night, you get caught kissing Dallas, tongues down each others’ throats and all that jazz, and the next thing everyone else knows, you’re walking with Sodapop and he’s got a hand in your pocket

Everyone is town is anxiously awaiting the day that the boys figure out you’re two-timing them because surely, Dallas Winston isn’t going to stand for you messing around on him

But ya know, nothing ever happens, even when people try and get Sodapop and Dallas to see what’s going-

With Soda, they’ll point out Dally and you sitting at a diner booth together, asking him what’s going on, cause weren’t you guys going steady?

And Dal, they’ll ask him where you are when you’re not at Buck’s, mentioning casually that you’ve been hanging out around the DX an awful lot-

With Male!Readers?

You guys are labeled just as good friends all the time and it makes it a lot easier to lie about why you guys are together all the time (curse you time-period realistic homophobia *shakes my fist at the sky*)

I would loveeeeee to do a male!reader piece for this topic, just saying guys-

This….really got away from me-

Sorry for making this so long guys-

[traegorn]

So when I do finish this book I am writing (speaking it into existence bc adhd is a BITCH) Like what's your experience with publishing? How much does it usually cost? What kinda income does one get? I don't really care about making money but it would be super neat to make something since I cannot work. How do taxes work on that also? Google is confusing me

So far i have an idea and half a first chapter with thrilling notes such as " add a cat" and "insert spell here"

So I self publish, so that's the world I know. If you want to find a traditional publisher, you'll need to query agents and do a bunch of other stuff. My only advice for traditional publishing is that when going that route, money should always flow towards the author. If they're asking you to pay for something, they aren't a traditional publisher and there's a good chance it's a grift.

So let's talk about what I do know.

(And this turned out to be long as hell, so I'm putting in a "keep reading")

When you self publish, you are effectively acting as the publisher. If you want someone to do edits? You'll have to hire an editor. If you want someone to do the book layouts? You'll have to hire someone to do it if you can't do it yourself. You need a cover? You get the idea.

Now I don't pay an editor, so I can't really give you a price range on how much they cost off the top of my head. I do know they can get expensive though.

I also do all my own interiors, but I have a graphic design background and have been doing print layouts for decades. If you want to hire someone to do the interiors, that can run you $100-500, so I recommend just... learning to do it yourself.

Frankly, it's not terribly hard. I do mine in Apple Pages on my Mac for my paperbacks and Amazon has a free program for formatting eBooks (which you can export both as the Kindle format OR the more universal ePub format). With your print version, you just want to make sure you get your margins right, along with using a standard font like Times New Roman.

Like, literally just pick up a book and study the layout. Look at the front matter (copyright page, title page, etc) of a handful of books and mimic what you find there. I don't know why so many self published authors get that bit wrong. It's a book. Format it like a book.

Now the cover... this is where you'll probably end up spending something. I do my own covers for my comics, but hire out for my novels because I can't do the kind of covers expected of my genre. And you do want to match your genre, because you want a potential reader to know what they're getting into. I've seen so many self published books with terrible covers and it drives me nuts.

Cover design can run you anywhere from $35-$400 depending on who you choose to contract, and this is where I recommend you spend your money. On the cheap end you have companies like GetCovers. Now they primarily do covers made from edited stock photos, and I've honestly been pretty satisfied with their work... but you have to hold their hand and be very clear with what you want.

GetCovers is a part of Mibl Group, and it's pretty much all of their most inexperienced employees. The whole point of it is to get them the experience to work on bigger projects down the road. They have cheaper packages, but for their best work you'll probably only spend like $35-$45. If you're working in a genre that mainly uses stock images, that's who you want.

I often end up retouching the covers they do though, because I'm impatient. Like there are edits to The Witch and the Rose and Shadowcasting I made after they handed me the completed files. You're going to have to be very specific with what you want. The first version of the Bloody Damn Rite cover they did... was awful. But they did the revisions I asked for, and the version they delivered in the end was great.

Now if you want, like, original art or just more complicated, custom stuff? You're looking at at least $250 on the cheap end, but sometimes you end up in the ballpark of $700-$1000. Like on their regular site (just to use the same company as GetCovers for comparison), the Mibl group charges like $300 for a more complicated stock photo based cover (that requires more complicated edits) and at least $700 for covers that require digital painting, 3d modeling, etc.

There are a wide range of prices depending on what you're asking for. But, y'know, you're paying that once for a commercial piece of graphic design.

I'm cheap and can do some of the work myself, so I go for the $35 cover. I also figure out what fonts they used for the covers, so I can go buy my own commercial license for them and replicate a similar logo on my title page. You don't need to do that bit, I'm just finicky.

Actually publishing the book is easy. You'll want to use a self publishing platform like Kindle Direct Publishing or IngramSpark (or, if you're like me, both). I sell KDP books on Amazon, but all other distribution is through IngramSpark. You make more money on Amazon by using KDP, but even though they offer distribution, no book store will ever order through them. So I turn that option off, and then I take the same book and I make it available through IngramSpark.

On amazon I make a little more than $2 on a $3 ebook, and about $4.00 on a $12.99 paperback. When a bookstore buys an IngramSpark version, I make about $2.50 on a $14.99 book (if you wondered by my books cost more when not buying it through Amazon... that's why). Now if you buy yourself author copies, they cost way less -- in the end I think I can get them for like $5 a book? So when I sell them in person, my margins are much higher.

But, y'know, you have to actually sell them.

Because that's the hard part. When self publishing, you only have you to market it. I don't know how many books I'd be selling if I didn't have a pre-existing audience -- and even then it's not a huge amount. I've sold about 200 books this year? Which isn't nothing, and I appreciate every single person who's purchased one of my titles, but it's obviously not enough to quit my day job for, y'know?

That said, I've known people who do sell enough to make a steady living. So it's possible for sure.

But it's not going to happen overnight, and it won't be easy.

As for taxes, you'll need a 1099 and do stuff with the Schedule C. I always forget exactly what until I'm actually doing them, but it's not super hard, just annoying.

[nobody-nexus]

Ragapom HCs I Have

(WARNING: There's a LOT of headcanons)

-Transfem Lesbian Pomni (Is On The Spectrum)

-Cisgender Bisexual Ragatha (Has ADHD)

-Pomni has a cat tail (This is to give other hcs context)

-Pomni loves hearing Ragatha play the cello

-Ragatha will always ask if it's okay if she can touch Pomni or not, but if they're in immediate danger there's no time to ask (she will ask if Pomni's okay and apologize AFTER the danger has passed)

-Pomni learned how to sew just to help out Ragatha (She's not great at it, but it's better than nothing)

-They both learned each other's favorite smells and they've asked for candles of that scent just to sit in their rooms and take it in

-Pomni's not the BIGGEST fan of her body but Ragatha makes sure she feels valid (if you misgender her, you die. There's no getting pass it)

-Ragatha hides her love of horses because she's embarrassed by it, but Pomni actually really like animals

-Pomni makes various animal noises when expressing emotions, mainly cat or even dog like noises- and Ragatha's memorized all of them

-Blanket cuddles ALL THE TIME- even if Pomni's okay with touch. Ragatha being one giant comforter for Pomni always makes her SO HAPPY

-Pomni has bells on her tail, which although was Caine's idea, it DID make it easier for Ragatha to know if Pomni's sneaking away for a late-night snack or not

-Pomni has a BIG love for dresses. Ragatha once made a dress for Pomni, who wears it every time they go on a date

-Jax was the first to find out about them dating by barging into their room while they were making out. Caine was the last to find out, but still thinks they're "gal pals"

-Whenever Ragatha's having a bad day, Pomni just likes to talk. Since she's not always up for physical comfort, she knows her voice soothes Ragatha

-Pomni swears a lot whilst Ragatha hardly does so

-Ragatha makes Pomni flustered CONSTANTLY, and she never even means to

-Pomni's stamina is nonexistent while Ragatha can run for hours without realizing it

-Ragatha can pick up Pomni like she's nothing

-Pomni is awful at coming up with cute nicknames for Ragatha, but Ragatha has a bunch. Her favorite one is 'sweetheart' for Pomni

-If the jester's feeling very protective, she'll bite Ragatha to show bite marks, showing that no one touches Ragatha but her (And the doll's beyond embarrassed about it)

-Pomni's flirting sucks, but Ragatha's reaction is THE most 30s thing you could imagine. Hands on sides of face, shaking her head a little, "Oh Pomni, QUIT IT! You're gonna make me blush!", blushing hard, giggling along the way

-If Pomni gets flustered enough, she gets a nosebleed like a cartoon character! Her blood is black in color

-Ragatha lets Pomni help in the kitchen by grabbing ingredients for her. That's about it

-Ragatha was shocked hearing Pomni talk in Spanish and Russian for the first times (AN: YES, I still think Pomni's Russian and Hispanic)

-When they kiss, it's VERY obvious. Ragatha wears red lipstick, and it gets all over Pomni's face, making her all red and flustered, but she loves it every time it happens

-No one has told Pomni her eyes turn into hearts when she's infatuated yet. Not even Jax (Mainly cause Ragatha won't ALLOW him to do so)

-Pomni thinks Ragatha looks hot holding knives.... Ragatha's a little bit of a klutz with knives in reality

-Unlike Ragatha, Pomni actually likes bugs. She usually handles centipedes if any are around

-Ragatha has a big sweet tooth which is why she bakes. Although it has lead to Ragatha accidentally getting high because Zooble made pot brownies... Multiple times

-Pomni is easy to anger whilst Ragatha has a long fuse, but can be easily bothered

-If Pomni gets too stressed out, her teeth get shark like. She can crush a damn BONE with them, and Ragatha helps out with those said bones (don't ask where she gets them from)

-Pomni likes playing horror games whilst Ragatha likes calmer games

-Ragatha loves FNaF and will ramble about it to Pomni

-Pomni likes to draw! Ragatha loves ALL the drawings she does

-They watch Disney movies in bed together :D

-Most of their dates get ruined because of Jax or Caine (Sometimes Bubble)

-Ragatha gets oddly competitive in multiplayer games, thus why they don't play many multiplayer games together

-Slow dancing is Ragatha's favorite romantic thing to do with Pomni

-They usually kiss when both are laying down because the height difference hurts Ragathas back hurt when they kiss whilst standing

-Pomni HATES being wet with her clothes on. Pomni has to be carried by the scruff of her outfit like a cat because she just COMPLETELY shuts down due to overstimulation of the wet clothes against her skin

-Ragatha hates her hands, but Pomni finds them interesting, and she likes to watch Ragatha use her hands for various things JUST to see how they work

-Caine almost gave them a child by overhearing something they said wrong, but thankfully the two were quick enough to stop him

WOW that's a LOT of hcs. And maybe I have more. Hope you like them!

[chaoticbardlady99]

Yesterday I Felt like Dancing (Astarion x GN! Reader)

Synopsis: You have burnt both ends of the candle and haven’t been taking care of your mental health. Unable to get yourself out of bed, Astarion begins to worry about you…

Author note- I have been hardcore struggling with my mental health lately and writing my silly little fics has been the only thing pulling me along. I thought it might be therapeutic to write about my current feelings (I have ADHD, MDD, and GAD so it’s a party up in here). I hope you enjoy!

CW- Suicidal Ideation, symptoms of depression, brief outburst, mentions of mental health diagnosis and poor medical advice.

Title inspired by song “Into the Walls” by Griff.

*not my pic, could not tell you where I found it so I apologize in advance. If you think it might be your picture, please message me so I can give proper credit.

Your last day before backtracking from the Mountain Pass to the Goblin camp is a difficult one.

Not for the group as a whole- just you specifically.

Days before a Mindflayer kidnapped you, a healer back home had told you your brain was sick. You had been devastated- resigned to your miserable fate.

You had been struggling for years at that point with inconsistent motivation, exhaustion, nightmares, and irrational thoughts for months. You have been functional for the most part, but then an overpowering wave will hit you like Warhammer in the ribs and you are rendered useless until it passes.

The healer suggested sunlight, exercise, eating healthy, and spending time with friends to help your affliction when you hit rock bottom. You were wildly unimpressed with her. At the time, you preferred to self isolate so you stayed by yourself in the woods trying to find peace there. You would have to let her know that her “going out and enjoying the sun” message is not always wise- you may get a tadpole shoved in your head. You can’t be that mad though- the tadpole helped bring your pep back.

Anyway, you have been doing all of that for weeks now, you even felt great, but today? You could not have hit rock bottom harder even if you tried.

You woke up that morning unable to get yourself out of bed. It was a rest day so it wasn’t a big deal, but you also know that your companions are going to have things they need to talk to you about and favors they need you to take care of.

Gods you had tried to get up. You are grateful that your past self had the gumption to wash off and change into clean clothes last night, but your armor is still disgustingly sitting outside your tent and your hair is long and wild. You had wanted to braid it, but it all felt like too much work.

Everything feels like too much work right now- even staying awake- so you drift in and out of uncomfortable naps throughout the morning. No matter how many times you fall asleep, begging for relief from the painful brick wall sitting on your brain, it never leaves.

You can feel the midday breeze rustle your tent. You’ve been laying here for hours now. You are crying and you honestly aren’t sure why. You feel completely paralyzed by all the things you need to do to be ready for the Underdark.

You need to clean your armor, go over the Goblin Camp’s map with Wyll, find Gale a magical artifact, and probably comfort Lae’zel since she’s been branded a heretic- but you won’t. The shame and self loathing continues. You are a silly, worthless little human being.

Every person who knocks on your tent gets a simple, “I’m just not feeling well,” and then they walk away. You don’t know why it makes you more sad than appreciative. If you were in their shoes- you would be bending over backwards to make sure they had everything they needed and you wouldn’t let them feel alone. Then you resent yourself for feeling that way towards your companions- they don’t owe you anything and you were the one who chose to help them- you didn’t ask for anything in return. This is all your fault.

The only person who hadn’t come to visit you was Astarion- which hurt your heart just a little, enough that the numbness coursing thickly through your body wavered for a moment. You are quite smitten and he is obviously not. Another mistake to add to the swirling black hole your mind has fallen into.

You knew it was stupid to want his comfort and affections- you had merely slept together a little less than a week ago. Astarion has been quasi avoiding you ever since and when he does talk to you- he’s awkward. You constantly look for flying pigs- Astarion feeling awkward or being awkward is unheard of.

You have come to accept that you were just some tryst and obviously he hadn’t enjoyed it as much as he said he did.

Astarion isn’t to blame and the situation itself certainly didn’t contribute to the sudden lack of emotions. You knew that you were on the verge of a mental collapse sooner rather than later, but you had foolishly hoped you wouldn’t be alone through it. It feels less all consuming when you try to find a reason. It’s more comfortable to know than it is to give up and say, “my brain is fucked and there isn’t a damn thing I can do so I guess I’m stuck here.”

You are jolted out of your thoughts by another knock on your tent.

“I’m sick,” you say flatly.

“Ha- you act like that will deter me. I can’t even get sick, Darling.”

Before you even have time to register that Astarion is on the other side of your tent- he pushes his way through the flaps and stares down at you in confusion. And… concern?

Astarion steps inside and kneels down next to you- scanning you for evidence of illness or injury.

“I suppose I had been worried for nothing,” he smiles sweetly at you, “you are totally fine. Come on Darling, you have to get up and eat. Wyll is fumbling with that map.”

You look at him and begin to cry. Astarion’s face lights up with alarm.

“What- what did I do!?”

“Please don’t make me,” you sob, “I just want a break. I’m so tired. I want to lay in this bed forever and never leave, but there is so much to do and it’s paralyzing.”

You continue to cry and you cover yourself with the extra blanket- successfully hiding your face.

“Go away,” you whisper, “I need to be left alone.”

You say it, but you are far from meaning it. You want him to stay- to hold you- but he doesn’t want you so it will only make everything hurt worse once the numbness fades away.

You wait for several moments and then you hear him leave. Your silent cry turns into choked sobs and your body is shaking from the pain you are in. The numbness hurts. The numbness tells you that you shouldn’t be alive.

Maybe you shouldn’t be.

Everyone here would be able to figure it out on their own (eventually) and you would finally be free. Free of your uncomfortable brain, free of your ugly body- free of the expectations of others. You would no longer be holding them back like you are today- like you will again in the future.

You are sure they would temporarily grieve you, but that was the deal with this whole journey. You had all accepted that one of you or all of you could die at any moment. You will just put them in more danger by being here…

You shake the thought from your head, violently- your head is pounding from the growing tension headache and dehydration. The tears eventually stop and you just… well, lay in bed again. You stare blankly at a book over in the corner. You keep trying to convince yourself to get up and read the damn thing- do literally ANYTHING else than just stay here in your bedroll.

Instead, you fall asleep.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

You wake up to someone knocking on your tent post. You grumble incoherently, covering your head and you hear your unexpected guest sit down next to you. The smell of food fills the tent and your stomach grumbles.

“You need to eat, my Dear,” Astarion says softly.

You are stunned to hear his voice grace your ears. You slowly pull the blanket down to just below your eyes and look at him. Astarion looks distressed, like he doesn’t want to be here. Why would he? You’re a nuisance.

You sit up gingerly and grab the bowl from him. You manage to give him a lopsided smile.

“Thanks. You don’t need to stay, I will be fine on my own,” you say apathetically, staring into the broth.

“I want to stay,” he says, “if you’ll have me.”

The expression on his face is unreadable, but he seems genuine. You nod, your lips pressed together tightly. You eat as much as you feel like while Astarion studies you.

Usually your anxiety is at an all time high (in maybe one of the better ways) when you are around Astarion- he gives you butterflies, butterflies, and even more butterflies. Usually your heart is racing in his presence, but right now you just feel empty.

“Where is your hairbrush?” Astarion asks.

You frown with confusion, “it’s in my bag, why?”

Astarion gets up and goes over to the bag- digging out a few items. He pulls out a lantern, your hairbrush, and a hair tie. Astarion comes over to you and sits down behind you. You feel him gather up the stray pieces of your hair and get to work.

Astarion runs his fingers through your scalp and your tangled hair- the feeling is soothing and it opens something inside of you. Your body shakes silently with sobs and you feel the worm behind your eyes wiggle as Astarion asks for access. You aren’t sure.

“I want to understand,” Astarion says, “please.”

His voice is so raw and desperate- you swallow thickly before allowing him to explore your current emotional state. The silence in the tent is palpable and you feel tense, uncomfortable even. No one has ever cared for you while you are in this state before.

You feel him continue his hairbrushing after he exits your mind. Astarion leaves soft kisses on your shoulder as he gently pulls apart every knot. It helps- you realize- to feel cared for. The numbness still hurts, you still hurt, but it’s nice to not feel so alone.

After Astarion is done brushing your hair, you feel his delicate fingers begin to intricately braid your hair. You wonder when he learned how to do hair.

“Leon’s daughter, Victoria, used to ask me to braid her hair all the time,” Astarion says in a bittersweet voice as if reading your mind, “I picked it up so that she would stop bugging me about it. She said and I quote, ‘you have the perfect braiding hands!’”

You smile to yourself tenderly, “That’s very kind of you, Star. I am sure she appreciated it as much as I appreciate it now.”

You feel Astarion’s hands falter at your words and you are unsure if you have upset him or not. A pregnant pause occurs before Astarion finally clears his throat and goes back to braiding your hair.

“I’m glad that I can help,” Astarion’s delicate, vulnerable words hang in the air, “I’ve… been worried about you today.”

You feel positively flustered and bad for making him feel that way.

“Oh you don’t need to worry about silly ole me! This happens sometimes” you make your voice chirpier than it needs to be, “This is actually the longest I’ve gone for a long time without this happening. I have theorized that the tadpole might help which is kinda cool- I think?”

You laugh awkwardly- desperate to ease his worry.

“How often does this happen?”

Shit. That was the winning question wasn’t it? Astarion will surely never see you as anything less than broken now.

“I’m not really sure,” your voice comes out in a whisper, “I usually always feel a bit of it all the time, but it’s manageable. I function very well regardless.”

“But this one isn’t manageable and evidently you aren’t functional right now.”

You sigh, “No, it isn’t and no, I’m not.”

“What changed?”

“Nothing,” you say, maybe too harshly, “that’s the part that drives me crazy. Yesterday was incredible- I was on top of the whole world, felt like dancing and screaming from the rooftops, but today!?”

You inhale and hold back the muted scream that wants to fill the air.

“Today,” you hiss, “I don’t even want to deal with any of this shit anymore. I’m so fucking tired. There is too much to fucking do and too many people depending on me. Then everyone gets irritated with me if I ask to push off their problems so I persevere through it despite knowing I’m getting bad again. I’m a giant stinking trash heap that everyone keeps adding more to.”

Astarion finishes braiding your hair and presses your back to his chest, pulling you into him. He puts his arms around your waist and settles his chin and face in between the crook of your neck.

“I just feel like such a nuisance all the time- no matter how hard I push myself to prove I’m not. Sometimes I think everyone would be better off if I just… went away.”

You both sit there quietly. At some point he had taken one of your hands in his and he was tracing shapes into the back of it with his thumb. Your omission still hangs heavily in the air.

“I wouldn’t be better off,” Astarion says hotly, “I’d be stuck with all these weirdos by myself. That would be truly miserable, Darling.”

You shake your head, a half smile on your face.

“And besides- you are not even close to a nuisance,” Astarion states, leaving a kiss on your cheek, “at least you aren’t in constant need of magical objects to eat or blood to drink. Oh and you don’t require a painstaking amount of searching to prevent you from literally burning everyone alive.

“Oh and did I forget to mention, we have not one, but two women who despise each other and follow hateful Goddesses which was a fun choice for whatever sick bastard twisted our fates this way.”

You laugh breathily, closing your eyes and letting the sound defrost some of your insides.

“What I’m saying is- I think you are the least of everyone’s ‘nuisances’, my Darling,” he says, squeezing you tighter to his chest, “despite how little you think of yourself. We ne- no, I want you to stay. I know everyone else would say the same, but I must emphasize that I would be horribly distraught if you disappeared. Hells I’d even pay to have you resurrected.”

You gasp playfully, your voice falling slightly flat, “You? The most frugal man I have ever met would pay 200 gold coins to ‘Strike thy name from the record’?”

Your impression of Withers gets Astarion to genuinely laugh- the sound vibrating in your chest. You lean into him and he guides you back to laying down. Astarion entangles his legs with yours as he holds you tightly- your faces are mere centimeters apart. You love the way Astarion smells- rosemary, bergamot, and brandy. You wish you could be wrapped up in him forever. You are still in pain- everything still hurts and feels too difficult, but right now it feels a little less heavy.

“I would throw bags of Gold Coins at that corpse out of revenge, my Dear,” he teases, “you couldn’t possibly think I would ever let you rest peacefully in your grave- I would be far too angry with you and unhappy without you to let that happen.”

You lay there and despite yourself, you lean forward and leave butterfly kisses along his cheeks with your lashes. Astarion scrunches up his nose reflexively and smiles at you. You plant a sweet, short kiss on his lips.

“Thank you Astarion- for everything.”

You close your eyes as he traces circles along your lower back. Your eyes begin to droop, and you fall asleep.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When you wake up the next morning- you are disappointed to find that you are all alone in your tent. The heavy numbness is still there and you sigh. At least last night made it more bearable.

You look on the side where Astarion had been sleeping and find a note with a bottle attached to it. You pick it up and begin to read.

Tav,

Astarion had asked me about herbs for some relief regarding mental discomforts. I unfortunately don’t know many, but this is a mixture of St. John’s Wort, Valerian Root, and Ashwagandha. Historically, I know these have been used to alleviate emotional and mental pain.

Astarion didn’t tell me why he was asking, but I deduced it was you pretty quickly when he began shooing everyone away from your tent this morning.

I hope this helps- we are all here if you need us. May Silvanus light your path as you navigate this difficult time.

-Halsin

You sit in your own stunned silence for what feels like hours. Halsin knows and he wants to help? Halsin doesn’t think you are screwed or a nuisance? The man barely even knows you!

You are a bit embarrassed, but you can’t help but laugh at the image of Astarion telling everyone to leave you alone.

You open the bottle and a pleasant, earthy smell fills the tent. You drink the mixture (that definitely does not taste anywhere near as pleasant as it smells) and you do feel a slight bit better. Your apathy feels even more tolerable now. You will have to thank Halsin.

You slowly rise from your tent and look around. Everything is packed up neatly in the corner- your clothes from the previous day are folded nicely and you notice all the holes are sewn up.

You jump when someone enters your tent abruptly- the midday sun warming your skin. You turn around and Astarion is smiling at you, but looks nervous.

“I cleaned off your armor and your weapons,” he says awkwardly, scratching the back of his head, “I also packed up your stuff- as you can see. We have to start leaving unfortunately, but I’ll help you get on your armor like I usually do- I might still need help with mine though, but I can ask someone else if it’s too much for you right now. Lae’zel and Karlach offered to pack up your tent. Wyll and Shadowheart figured out the map- Wyll is going to be our ‘fearless’ leader for the day. Gale has some food for you to snack on while we travel- which you will be eating, by the way.”

Astarion is looking at you with a vulnerable expression on his face. He plays nervously with the gold coin in his hands.

You can hardly believe what you are hearing.

“Did- did you do all this for me?” You say with disbelief.

You never thought Astarion was capable of smiling shyly until he had admitted to you that you had been his first thinking creature- you certainly never thought you’d see him become shy twice in your presence.

“I did and it wasn’t a nuisance so don’t even begin to worry about that,” He walks over to you, gently cradling your face in his hands, “I hope this is all okay.”

You smile- the first genuine feeling of happiness you’ve felt in the last 24 hours gently sparks in your chest as you stare up at him. You get up on your tiptoes and bridge the gap between your lips.

“Thank you Astarion, this is perfect- you are perfect,” you are crying tears of joy, “this is the kindest gesture anyone has ever made for me. So just, thank you.”

“Of course, Darling,” he says smiling in between kisses, “I won’t let you lose to yourself. We’ll get through this together from now on- no more hiding.”

And for once? You actually believe someone.

-if you guys like this, please let me know if you would want a part two written from Astarion’s perspective.

Update- I did the thing you silly geese

https://www.tumblr.com/chaoticbardlady99/735969926279528448/i-took-all-this-love-i-found-and-i-hope-that-its

Tag-list: @spacebarbarianweird @domainoflostsouls

[brotrustmeicanwrite]

I fucking hate AI but heavens would it be useful if it wasn't such an unethical shit show

First, just to be clear, I'm talking about actually using AI as a tool to support your writing process, not to generate soulless texts made from stolen data instead of writing yourself.

Back when ChatGPT first became available it was still pretty useless so I had a lot of time to learn about how it's made, how it works and the ethics of it before ever touching the technology. I decided pretty quickly to never use it to generate text (or images) for actual writing and art but I still wanted to experiment with what else it could do (because I'm a nosy bitch that needs to know and poke everything).

And HEAVENS was it a blessing for writing with adhd

The last time I wrote more than 200 words in a day (outside of school work obviously) was 7th grade. I wrote over 8k just in notes the day Google's "Gemini" (formerly "Bard") became available to the public.

In order to not jeopardize my existing work I decided to make a completely new story with Bard's help that wasn't linked in any way to anything I had made before. So I started with a prompt along the lines of "I need help writing a story". At first, it immediately started generating a completely random story about a green tiger but after some trial and error, I got it to instead start asking questions.

What do you want the theme of your story to be?

What genre do you want to write in?

What time period do you want your story to take place in?

Is there magic?

Are there other sentient creatures besides humans?

And so on and so forth. Until the questions became extremely specific after covering all the bases. I could tell that all I was doing was essentially talking to an amalgamation of every "how to write" blog and website you've ever seen and telling it which part I wanted to work on next but it still felt great because the AI didn't actually contribute anything besides a few suggestions of common tropes and themes here and some synonyms and related words there; I was doing all the work.

And that's the point.

Nothing in that exchange was something I couldn't easily do on my own. But what happened was that I had turned what is usually a chaotic mess of a railway network of thoughts into a clear and most importantly recorded conversation. I can sit down and answer all those questions on my own but what usually happens when I do, is that every thought I have branches out into 4-7 new ones which I then attempt to record all at once (which obviously doesn't work, yay adhd) only to end up lost in thought with maybe 20 lines of notes in total after 6 hours at the table. Alternatively, either because I get bored or just because, I get distracted by something or my own thoughts about a different unrelated topic and end up with even less.

Working within the boundaries of a conversation forces you to focus on one specific question at a time and answer it to progress. And the engagement from the back and forth is just enough entertainment to not get bored. The six hours I mentioned before is the time I spent chatting with what is essentially a glorified chatbot that day, way less time than what I spent on any other project, and yet I have more notes and a clearer image of the story than I do about any of my real work. I have a recorded train of thought.

In theory, this would also work with a real human in a real conversation but realistically only very few people have someone who would be willing to do that; I certainly don't have a someone like that. Not to mention that someone doesn't always have time. Besides that, a real human conversation involves two minds with their own ideas, both of which are trying to contribute their own thoughts and opinions equally. The type of AI chat that I experimented with, on the other hand, is essentially just the conversation you have with yourself when answering those questions, only with part of it outsourced to a computer and no one else butting into your train of thought.

On that note, I also tried to get it to critique my writing but besides fixing grammatical errors all that thing did was sing praises as if I was God. That's where you'll 100000% need humans.

tl;dr writing with AI as an assistant has basically the same effect as body doubling but it’s an unethical shit show so I’m not doing it again. Also I forgot to mention I did repeat the experiment for accuracy with different amount of spoons and it makes me extra bitter that is was very consistent

[dearfae]

୨🌸୧ - dating headcanons!

the seven : heroes of olympus

girlfriend version.

4.8.24

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

percy jackson :

lots and lots of kisses

hand holding

loves your cooking/baking (especially blue waffles *wink wink*)

every time you go on a date it’s water related - the beach, aquarium, underwater restaurant etc.*

*sometimes you go to the movies or amusement parks too tho

constant compliments

lets you choose what he wears sometimes

cute nicknames

very protective and loyal (ofc)

teaches you how to fight (if you don’t already know)

swimming competitions but he goes really easy on you

pegasus racing

braids flowers into your hair

sarcastic and funny jokes to cheer you up

would literally die for you

his mom and step-dad paul LOVE YOU

takes you shopping

buys all your favourite foods when you’re on your period

needs comfort after his nightmares

annabeth chase :

teaches you a lot

hours long talks about each other’s interests

reading and museum dates !!

forehead, nose, cheek kisses

wakes up really early so you’re always awake before everyone else too

spends lots of her time thinking of ways she can make you smile

would do anything for you

picnics :)

takes great joy in annoying you by correcting your grammar or spelling

will make you do a hundred pushups if you insult any author ever

will also make you quote shakespeare

sneaks into your room at night by picking locks instead of just knocking (chalice of the gods reference)

hesitant to let you meet her parents at first

but when you do she’s really happy because you get along with them really well

you always help her win capture the flag (she protects you 99.9% of the time)

death glares/will fight anyone whose mean to you

you never have to google anything because she’s right by your side

needs constant reminders that you’ll never leave or she needs to take a break

hates surprises

jason grace :

literally the sweetest

is only relaxed/vulnerable with you

learnt how to break a few rules *wink wink again*

always cleaning his glasses

the person who dares to be mean to you better count their days

surprisingly smart

deep conversations

doesn’t really know what to do when it comes to dates or anything romantic

forgets things sometimes

keeps a little notebook in which he writes everything he loves about you

makes your birthday cake from scratch

physical touch for reassurance

teaching you about roman history is his love language

pretends to hate the nicknames you give him but secretly loves them

keeps a picture of you with him at all times

quiet around others

never raises his voice at you

sometimes you act like his mother figure (is that what it’s called?)

winks or smiles at you when others aren’t looking

leo valdez :

shit music taste (I’M SORRY)

treats you like the queen that you are

holds doors open for you

points at you and says really loudly to everyone else, “HAVE YOU SEEN MY BEAUTIFUL AMAZING WONDERFUL GIRLFRIEND??”

inside jokes

you gave him a bracelet and now he never takes it off

gives you flowers!

sleeps in

cuddles, kisses and his arms are practically glued to your waist

teaches you spanish (especially the swear words)

he COOKS

there’s never anything broken because he fixes them immediately

always makes you laugh

does skincare with you<3

shows you off to anyone that’ll listen (even if they won’t)

the kindest, most golden retriever boy ever

he’s still wary about opening up to his trauma

his severe adhd makes it hard for him to calm down so you always sing to him or play with his hair

excessive use of the words bro and dude

frank zhang :

picks you up bridal style whenever you get tired (he likes to impress you by showing off his strength)

gentle and caring

if you’re out eating together and you buy different things, he’ll let you taste both of them so you can have the one you like the most

gets flustered really easily

cheesy pick up lines (that you secretly love)

LOVES TO EAT

uses his title of praetor to take the mick out of you (as a joke)

cautious about trying new things

very punctual with time and chores

whenever there’s a praetor meeting he lets you sit next to him

you make sure that there isn’t any dairy in the food you make him

he was so happy when you learnt canadian for him

you let him teach you about his family tree

if you’re feeling sad he’ll shapeshift into a puppy or something to cheer you up

he can actually be pretty snarky when he wants to

you’re literally the safest girl on earth when he’s around

the poor boy gets really shy when you flirt with him

really good at making different accents

his writing is SO hard to read😭

piper mclean :

likes to make you blush

let’s you taste the lipstick she uses by kissing her

swears

candlelit dates, stargazing, mall shopping

buys you perfume and clothes

definitely asks for you to rate her outfits

she thinks you’re prettier than anyone else in the world, so much so that’s she’d straight up call her mother ugly

really excited for you to meet her dad

she’s your BIGGEST supporter!

you have to stop her from slitting peoples’ throats when they say anything remotely harsh to you

plays with your hair and brushes/styles it for you (she lets you do the same for her)

SKINCARE NIGHTS<3

binge watches 2000s movies - bratz, mean girls, the devil wears prada etc

you call her lots of playful names

rips down any posters of her father she sees, makes it her personal mission to burn every single one of them (you laugh every time)

loves flipping people off

she’s actually really sweet and caring

loves when you hold her hand

paints your nails :3

hazel levesque :

loves exploring abandoned underground tunnels

she made a bracelet for you out of the gems she pulled from the ground

every time you swear she chases you with a bar of soap

you help her with her curly hair

she’s so innocent (unless she’s angry, hungry or tired; then she goes ballistic)

you tease her when she gets flustered

she takes you for midnight rides on arion

she always smells like fresh rain

calls you ‘miss your surname’ whenever she scolds you

she sleeps with extra pillows

if you pass a graveyard she’ll wave to the ghosts

graceful and kind

loves nature

really good with kids

bakes you cookies on national girlfriend day

if there’s one thing she hates, it’s when people misquote the bible

sometimes she’d have major deja vu moments from her past life if you go somewhere she did the first time she was alive

gets really excited when it’s date night!

she can be so incredibly fierce and powerful but if a butterfly or something dies she’ll literally start bawling her eyes out

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

that’s all i can think of lol

let me know if i missed anything or you disagree with what i’ve put! i’m open to any criticism :)

hope you enjoyed! i might do another one with different characters!

©dearfae

[divine0rdainment]

IMMA WRITE SOME FANFICS!

So imma try and write some more fanfictions soon. Attempt is the correct word becuse my ADHD is a bitch. But I was wondering which of my Au's you'd like to see written about first. Imma share the ones I like the most below and if you guys have a specific interest in one, please Comment the ones you'd like to see. I'll set up a Pole to have people vote on based on which Au's have the most people interested and work from there.

Now for the aus, I'll write the name of the au and description so you know what I'm talking about.

1) Taking What Is Forbidden (Continuation)

I already wrote two chapters for this but I have a few ideas I could expand on after, but in summery, An Eden au where Adam eats the apple of knowledge on purpose to find a way to make Lucifer fall in love with him, (or straight up force his angel in to isolation with him) resulting in them both falling. Heavily implied Yandere Demon King Adam vibes.

2) Operation Replace Lilith AU

Adam dies and goes back in time to the day he was created and has the brilliant idea of seducing Lucifer in order to get Lucifer to take him to hell Instead of Lilith, and not have the same death he had in his last life (Lucifer beating the shit out of him and then being stabbed by Nifty.) Too bad he's bad at flirting and Lucifer is accidently great at it. And now he may have to accept the fact he's not so straight.

3) Paradise Found au

Michael and Lucifer switch roles, and Michael ends up going to hell with Lilith, while Adam, after his death, ends up married to Lucifer in heaven since Lilith was sent to purgatory. He's still an exterminator in this time lone and Lucifer is part of the High Angelic Council. They have two daughters (Lute and Charlie) who are both working along side them and they have found their happy ending... Till Emily, the daughter of Michael and Lilith shows up with her plans for "redemption" and Charlie's missing girlfriend. Then everything the two built falls apart in ways they can't control.

4) Lucifers Labyrinth AU

Adam is a single dad of 4 kids who are very irritated at him when he misses a big school event. After a big argument, one of the kids make a wish that end up sending the four kids and Adam to the demon realm. The king of the realm, Lucifer, makes a deal with Adam that if he can make it to the center of Lucifers very very large labyrinth and get his kids to forgive him, he will let Adam take them home. But if he fails, he and the kids would be trapped in the Demon Realm forever. Turns out, Lucifer just had a crush on Adam and wants to convince him to stay willingly but doesn't understand humans well.

5) Charlie is The DM Au (Multiple Ships in this)

Basicly, Sinner Adam, Lucifer, Vaggie, Husk, and Angel play DND with Charlie as a bonding exercise every week. They each have their own characters and get to tell a fun story full of weird interactions and funny dialogue, but all while telling a good story that helps them with their real life problems in hell too. Alastor joins soon to cause even more problems in game. (May actually make Character sheets for everyone to share in case you like them)

6) Mafia Bodyguard Au

Another Single father Adam au, where Adam is struggling with a group of kids (under the age of 10k after his wife Eve died. He is Ex military and is too filled with PTSD and stress to figure out how to survive as he is. Luckily his ex wife, Lilith, comes to see him at a bar and offer him a job working for her second Ex husband as a bodyguard to their child, Charlie. In doing so he'd get free housing, schooling, medical increase, food, and even a fully bullet proof car. All Adam has to do is work for the Morningstar Mafia. Oh, by the way, her ex husband is the leader of said Mafia. Adam accepts for his kids sake, and shit goes crazy from there

7) She's Just a Baby Au

(also known as I'm Just A Man Au)

During the war between Heaven and hell, Adam is told by Sera that Lucifer and Lilith had created a nephilim. An abomination that, according to the higher angels, will spell misfortune for Heaven and Hell, and sends Adam on a secret mission to destroy this monster. When Adam gets there during a battle outside of Lucifers castle, he finds the monster in question and realizes it's just a baby, a demon like baby, but still a baby. He tries to bring himself to kill her and can't, and instead protects her till Lucifer comes back. Lilith dies in the battle sadly, so now Charlie only has her father. But Adam, now breaking heavens orders a second time, knows he can't go back. So Lucifer lets him stay. The two raise charlie together.

8) Testing Love Potions Au (One Shot)

Velvette was making a love potion in her office during an extermination, only for Adam to slam in to her office, preparing to killed her. To defend herself, Velvette broke his mask and hit him in the face with a love potion. And before he can open his eyes, she escapes. Adam sees Lucifer on a billboard and instantly is stricken with love. Chaos happens. And Lucifer is VERY confused. Especially since his wife just left him last year to go to heaven.

So please do tell me your opinions! Tell me which ones you'd like to read first! I hope to do all of them, but I gotta start so where!

[keepingeahalive]

Holly and Poppy O'Hair Headcanons

Holly’s full name is Holly Ivy O’Hair. Poppy’s full name is Poppy Hazel O’Hair. 

Poppy uses she/they pronouns.

The twins were tower-schooled before attending Ever After High. 

Holly is cursed to have all doors that close behind her magically lock her in. She has to keep her dorm room door wedged open. Poppy isn’t completely comfortable with this and prefers the door to be closed, but she lets Holly keep it open a crack. 

Poppy was definitely one of those girls who cut up their dolls’ hair.

Holly has ADHD, which makes damsel-in-distress class really difficult for her even though it’s her entire story. She also has a one-track mind. Once she starts on a subject, she will not stop talking. She uses reading and writing as an outlet for all the things buzzing through her head.

Poppy is the shier of the two. She’s more of a listener than a speaker, which comes in handy when Holly goes on a passionate rant. The only time she has no difficulty socializing is when someone is in the barber’s chair.

Holly’s a researcher of old folktales and ancient civilizations. The Wicked Step-Librarians have had to lock her out of the library for sneaking in after curfew and not being able to get out. 

While they are close, Poppy wants to carve her own identity separate from Holly. She doesn’t only want to be known as Rapunzel’s sister. She wants to make a name for herself and have an impact on other people as her own person.

Holly is a morning person. Poppy is not. 

Holly is sometimes insecure over having so much hair. She can’t avoid stepping on it, getting it snagged on something, and sometimes dragging on the floor. She envies Poppy for being free to cut her hair.

Multiples run in their family. Their mother is also a twin. She has an older twin brother named Tarragon, but she got the Rapunzel destiny because she was female.

Holly has had a crush on all three Charming siblings at one point or another. 

Poppy was closer with Nanny Nona than Holly. Holly was wild and fidgety, frustrating Nona to no end. Poppy was the calmer of the two and thus got along better with Nona. Holly and Nona still get frustrated with each other from time to time.

Poppy loves spicy foods. She’s almost obsessed with them.

Their music choices differ drastically. Holly likes country pop music. Poppy is more into punk rock. However, they both share the same favorite artist: Dolly Charmton. Poppy plays the song “Midnight to Noon” to get her pumped up in the morning.

Poppy’s a great climber. She sometimes goes beanstalk climbing with Jillian. 

Holly is slightly taller than Poppy. 

Rapunzel and her husband work as the fairytale equivalents of district attorneys. As such, Holly and Poppy don’t get to see their parents very often - especially their mom - and it’s why they were left in the care of Nanny Nona. 

Holly does tutoring in Creative Writing.

Despite working in a literal barbershop, Poppy does not like barbershop music. 

Holly does not do things halfway and always takes the long road. She struggles in areas that don’t interest her, but she’s reluctant to take shortcuts. Her mother drilled into her head that “you can’t climb a tower if your hair is too short.” But Poppy tries encouraging her to “work smarter, not harder”.

Poppy has a thing for “baddies”. She used to have a crush on Sparrow, but got over him quickly when she found out he preferred Holly over her. She also has feelings for Duchess despite knowing she was voted “Most Likely to Steal Your Destiny.” Deep down, she knows it’s a problem.  

Holly theorized Daring wasn’t Apple’s Prince Charming but kept it to herself. The only person she told was Poppy. She was pretty happy when she found out she was right. 

Both sisters are devoted dragon moms.

They’re both very nervous for when their destiny comes to pass. Holly is a bit wary of living a lie; that she’s technically stealing her sister’s destiny. She’s also having some pre-guilt about blinding her future prince. Poppy is doing everything in her power to keep anyone from finding out the truth, because she wants to keep the life she’s been building for herself. 

[actual-changeling]

Welcome back to Alex's unhinged meta corner! I am fuelled up with coffee and my adhd medication, so this is about to be a RIDE.

Apologies in advance, since this post will probably get quite long and also scientific at some point, but I will try to keep it as plain and easy to understand as possible. Combine two of my special interests (Good Omens and chemistry) and you get absolutely insane infodumps; it's a blessing and a curse.

As always, this is simply a theory, and maybe I'm wrong, maybe we'll never find out. But it's an option, and I have canonical proof.

There have been endless theories about why the Gabriel-Hiding-Miracle (which I will shorten to GHM) set off alarm bells in heaven and reached a strength of 25 Lazarii. Are their half-miracles really combined that strong? Does it depend on their relationship or love?

Well, today I am here to tell you that, actually, there is no such thing as "half a miracle".

We are going to have a closer look at miracles themselves, but the first important thing to keep in mind is that most of the time, Crowley and Aziraphale are incredibly unreliable narrators and have barely any inside into how heaven and hell work. Remember, they have been on earth since 4004 BC, they are certainly not used to any of the internal routines and functions.

They can tell us all kinds of things, but that does not make them true.

Now, miracles!

Both angels and demons are capable of performing them, though they only seem to be counted as actual miracles when they happen on earth, seeing as they measured in Lazarii.

One Lazarus equals the miracle power it takes to bring one human being back to life—the consequence is that miracles must be bound to the earthly plane, since that is where their unit originated from. When they are performed in heaven or hell, they are still miracles in a broad sense—celestial beings using their powers—but not in a way that ascribes to the measuring system.

Neil once answered an ask about Lazarus as a unit, and he stated that miracles tend to be measured in Centi- or Millilazarii (mostly the latter), meaning that the GHM was about 1000x as strong as your usual, daily miracle. The labeling also tells us that the scale for Lazarii is the same as the metric one.

If we treat Lazarus as a base unit, we need to find a way of defining it that is unique to this specific unit.

Globally, we have a collection of agreed-upon base units, the SI units (coming from the French Système international d'unités, aka International system of Units). Those seven are second, metre, kilogram, ampere, candela, kelvin, and mole, and every single one has a very specific definition—they are too bloody complex. None of them can be expressed with one of the other SI units, which gives you great definitions such as these:

A little excursion for those that are interested: For a very long time, the kilogram was defined by. well. A cube. The "true kilogram", which is still in a vault somewhere in Paris. However, you can probably imagine why basing a unit on a physical objects isn't a great idea long-term, so back in 2018, the kilogram was redefined, along with three other units.

Now, all SI units are defined by natural constants, not physical objects, making them accurate and (more or less) absolute.

Back to miracles!

The reason I am telling you all this is that we need to find such a basic definition for miracles, too, or at least an approximation.

My proposal is that a miracle itself is the force exerted on matter by a a celestial being. That force is then measured in Lazarii, with one Lazarus being equal to the force required to bring one person back to life. This is where it gets a bit tricky because how do you visualize that kind of force?

Matter cannot be destroyed only created, so all the particles currently making up our bodies will continue to exist long, long after our deaths. Meaning when a person dies, the amount of matter that was them is still there, the consequence of which is that their body can be recreated at will. Now, souls seem to be separate from matter, making them metaphysical and thus irrelevant for this conversation. I am going with the assumption that once a body has been recreated, the soul can be put back into without additional cost in miracle power.

There might be another base unit hidden in the metaphysical, but that's a conversation for another time.

All of this amounts to one fundamental hypothesis:

A miracle is either done, meaning matter gets changed, or it isn't, meaning matter remains unchanged.

There is no in-between stage here, a "half-change" is not possible, either you exert a force on particles or you don't. What kind of change that is might not be tangible for us, but a change is a change.

When Crowley and Aziraphale try to hide Gabriel, they change the way he gets perceived, how others perceive him, aka they change the way his presence is processed.

The closest thing to compare it to, in my opinion, is the superior mirage—the Fata Morgana. At its core, it means that light bends as it passes through air layers with different temperatures; your eyes perceive the bent light rays and your brain processes them accordingly. You see images that aren't actually there.

Celestial beings look at Gabriel but see something that isn't actually there, so the "true" image remains hidden.

If we stick to this metaphor, then Crowley creates a mirage for any ethereal beings, and Aziraphale creates one for occult beings. The creation of that mirage is one miracle—not half a miracle, but ONE singular miracle. Both of them change matter, and both of these miracles can exist independently of each other.

Crowley and Aziraphale could have created their mirages on their own, meaning that two miracles were performed, not two halves of one miracle.

If you listen to the sound of the miracles, you can hear that it's different from the other ones they have performed on their own, with the "combined" miracle having two sound peaks instead of one. Tumblr hates it when I upload audio files, so have it like this.

In order, the miracles are Aziraphale lowering the chandelier and moving the shelves, Crowley removing the paintball stain, and the GHM.

IF they had both performed half a miracle, the end result would have been one miracle, meaning it should have sounded like any other—but it didn't! Two connected sounds, two simultaneous miracles.

There is still one thing left to talk about, which is the power of their miracle. Here is where my previous definition of Lazarus as a unit comes into play again.

Heaven measured a miracle power of 25 Lazarii aka a very high amount of force exerted on matter. You might think Alex, if they both performed their own miracle, how come that the alarm bells rang?

If we keep up the mirage metaphor, we can explain that! Crowley's intention was to make it so that ethereal beings cannot perceive him, so his miracle changed matter in a way that aligns with ethereal perception.

However, Aziraphale intended to change matter so that occult beings cannot perceive Gabriel, meaning his miracle changed matter in a way that is adapted to occult perception.

This is where science comes into play again!!

You see, particles aren't just particles, they are waves too. Wave-particle duality describes exactly that, e.g. an electron being both a particle and a wave at the same time. A connected theory to that is the Uncertainty principle, which describes the inability to measure the exact value of two different properties at the same time.

Or, to put it more plainly, if you try to figure out the exact position of a particle, its momentum becomes blurred, unclear. If you then focus on the momentum of the same particle, you can no longer describe its exact position.

You are probably looking at me now, thinking where the fuck are they going with this and why are there suddenly so many principles of quantum mechanics in a Good Omens meta post???

Crowley changes matter in way A.

Aziraphale changes matter in way B.

Those changes can co-exist, like an electron being a particle and a wave at the same time. However—and this is scientific theory adapted to celestial miracles—when an angel looks at Gabriel, then they are focusing on state A. When demons are looking at Gabriel, they are focusing on state B.

Focus on A and B becomes blurry. Focus on B and A becomes blurry.

Maintaining that double-state requires power though, because compared to wave-particle duality, these states aren't natural, they're inflicted—matter was changed. It's like the matter around Gabriel is flickering between those two states, a light switch trying to find a neutral position when there is only on and off.

How do we measure that power? In Lazarii.

The miracle energy that heaven measured is not that high because they each performed half a miracle and combined it into one, it is that high because they each performed one miracle that stands in opposition to the other; as a result, two different states need to be maintained at the same time, meaning the manipulation is ongoing, meaning it needs a fuckton of power.

If you want to keep balancing your light switch, you need to keep trying, you need to keep up the pressure, otherwise you either click it off or on. Same thing with the hiding miracle.

Twenty-five Lazarii.

The power you need to exert on matter to reshape twenty-five people—or to continuously hide one being from two opposing observers with rapidly-switching state changes.

While I think the whole "it's because of love" theory is fun and cute, scientifically it really doesn't make much sense because their powers have rules similar to our base units, so me must approach and treat them as such.

With that, thank you to everyone who made it this far and managed to survive our little excursion into the field of quantum mechanics.

Questions, thoughts, additions, etc. are very welcome!

[morgana-larkin]

a cute prompt [i hope] reader's been teaching at abbott for over a year now, usually commute or in rare occasions, drive in her car, but now, goes to the school riding bicycle saying it reduces carbon footprint, saves her from expenses and as an exercise. But she just really love bikes, Jacob joined with this, next day he arrived at school riding a bike, then Janine and Gregory. Barb, tho was always dropped off by Ger with their car, rode it the bike during break for fun. Abbott staff decided to have a biking get together next weekend, Melissa initially declined but later on agreed because of Jacob's teasing that she's a schemmenti and doesn't know how to ride a bike [unfortunately, it's true] also, she secretly enjoy seeing you biking. They meet up in the park, with their bikes and decided it's time to go around the area. Melissa, embarrassed, said maybe she wouldn't go that far and maybe wait for them. So the crew didn't argue and left, r stayed. When the staff is out of the earshot and sight of the she beamed and said she'll teach Mel how to ride a bike. Melissa, being flustered and a stuttering mess still acted offensive about the *assumption* of her not knowing how to ride. R gave her a look and agreed to teach her. This is long, but I don't know. I feel like I'm always rambling lololol

Anon, ramble all you want. I don’t mind detailed prompts. And honestly when my ADHD meds wear off, I’m like Spotify, where I do the whole playlist and then recommended. Like I literally don’t shut up lol. Tbh they wore off 3 hours ago lol. So I went a little off just a bit, I didn’t make Melissa flustered until she was being taught instead of flustered before. And it was cute, it really was! Anyway, a little smut at the end but it’s really cute and funny. Not edited in the slightest and I hope you like it!

On another note: I’m accepting Melissa Schemmenti, Chessy and Marilyn Thornhill prompts. So send them! I do currently have 9 that I still need to do but I’ll get to all of them!

Side note: for the gif I was literally watching her eat a tomato for 5 minutes…ok I’ll shut up now.

Teaching You

Warnings: 😏, fluff, sweet praise(non sexual praise), small injury part for Mel

Words: 4.3k

It’s spring time and the weather is finally warm enough for you to bike to work again. You get your helmet on, sling your backpack on and put your coffee mug in the water bottle holder. You unlock your bike from the lock wrapped around your bike and the bike rack in your apartment building and bring your bike outside. You kick up the kickstand and get on your bike, you check your helmet one more time and the little bell on your bike, then you take off.

You have a smile on your face as you’re happily biking to work on the busy Philly streets. You’ve always loved biking, your family are all big on biking and so are you, just something about it that you enjoy. You stop at a red light about a block away from the school and Melissa ends up pulling up to the light as well. You both end up seeing each other and you wave at her with a big smile then the light turns green. Melissa drives off with a smile and a shake of her head.

Once you pull up, you see Melissa parked and leaning on the brick wall of the school next to the bike rack. You pull up near the rack on your bike and get off and lock your bike.

“Hey hon.” She tells you with a smile and you look up at her after locking your bike.

“Hey Mel.” You tell her and then the trio is walking up to the school.

“Y/n did you ride a bike to school?” Jacob asks and you nod. You don’t really want to tell them how much you enjoy riding a bike, afraid they’ll make fun of you. This is your second year at Abbott but no one has seen you ride a bike before.

“Ya I did, it’s great exercise and helps saves the planet a bit.” You tell them and they all smile.

“Great idea.” Jacob tells you and you all walk in together. You and Melissa walk together with the trio trailing along behind you two.

Melissa tells you a joke and you laugh and playfully shove her gently with your shoulder and she does it back to you. The trio behind you smiling at the scene in front of them. You all enter the break and see Barb there on her phone, with Mr Johnson mopping the floor across the room.

“You guys all got here at the same time?” Barb asks all of you.

“More or less.” Melissa says.

“Y/n rode here on a bike this morning.” Janine says and Barb looks at you and smiles.

“Did you, dear?” She says and you nod. “How lovely.” She tells you and you smile.

After school you lock up your classroom, holding your helmet and start to walk out. Melissa ends up locking her classroom when you walk by and she joins you.

“Hey hon.” She tells you as she’s putting her phone in her purse and walking beside you.

“Hey Mel.” You tell her casually.

“So any plans for the weekend?” She asks you and mentally facepalms. It’s Monday, the weekend just happened.

“I don’t know, maybe some plans will come up but at the moment I’m free. You?” You ask her and she’s thankful you didn’t question why she asked you about weekend plans on a Monday.

“Nah, nothing yet.” She says to you and you end up at the bike rack. You put your helmet on and unlock your bike and put the lock in your bag.

“I can’t believe we didn’t know you rode a bike to school and it’s been over a year and a half.” She tells you and you look up at her and smile.

“Well I don’t do it in the winter, you guys just never saw me bike and I don’t really talk about it since it’s normal for me.” You tell her and kick up the kickstand and get on.

“Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow then?” She asks you and you nod.

“Yep, see ya tomorrow.” You tell her and you pedal off. Melissa watches you bike off and she smiles, she already thinks you’re cute, but seeing you happy on a bike warms her heart. She walks to her car with a smile.

The next day it seemed that Jacob decided to also ride a bike to school and you smile as you see him pull up to the rack as you’re locking yours.

“Hey hon, and Jacob.” Melissa says, confused when seeing Jacob as well.

“Hey Mel.” You tell her. “It seems Jacob also decided to bike to school.” You tell her excitedly.

“Well like you said, good exercise and good for the environment.” Jacob says with a shrug.

You all walk in the school, you and Melissa chatting and joking around. When you walk in the break room, Jacob joins Janine and Gregory and Melissa joins Barb. You on the other hand just drop your lunch off and get a coffee then you start to walk off when Melissa stops you.

“Hey hon, why don’t you ever stay?” She asks you and you look at her and realise that they’re all looking at you.

“Oh um, well I guess because you already have your groups of people to hang out with and I don’t want to intrude on that.” You tell her and they all look at you sadly. “It’s alright, I’ll find my own group of people.” You tell them and then walk out before anyone can say anything. Unknown to you, Melissa looks at where you were standing with a shocked and a bit upset face.

You don’t run into anyone after school as one of the parents was late to pick up their kid, apologies flowing out of their mouth and you wave them off saying it’s alright.

The next day it seemed you started a trend as Janine and Gregory also decided to bike to work.

“It’s so much fun to bike!” Janine says excitedly after getting off her bike. You all lock up your bikes and head into the school. You arrive at the break room and you go to put your lunch in the fridge and make your coffee. You go to walk out but Melissa stops you again.

“Hey hon, come sit down here.” She tells you and points to the empty chair at their table. You look at her a bit shocked. Your crush just invited you to sit with her and you blush. You then mentally facepalm as you realise you sound like a high school girl with a crush. You do end up sitting down with her and Barb and you have a nice morning.

At lunch, Barb asks if she can try out one of the bikes for fun. To which you accept and she has a lot of fun biking around the parking lot. All of you are sitting outside having lunch watching Barb bike around.

“Maybe we should get together this weekend and do a little bike ride together.” Janine suggests and you look surprised.

“Really?” You ask her and she nods.

“I’m down.” Jacob says immediately.

“Ya me too.” Gregory says.

“Ya I would love too.” You tell them.

“I wouldn’t mind joining as well.” Barb says and then you all turn to Melissa who’s sitting beside you.

“What?” She asks.

“Do you want to join us on a bike ride together this weekend?” Janine says to her.

“Nah I’m good.” She tells you all.

“Why not?” Jacob asks and she shrugs.

“Cause I don’t wanna.” She tells him.

“Is it because you’re such a tough Schemmenti and you don’t know how?” Jacob says a bit to tease her playfully and doesn’t know that he’s actually right.

“I know how to ride a bike!” She tells him defensively.

“Ok then prove it. Join us this weekend.” He challenges her.

“Fine, what’s the time and place?” She asks and you all settle on Saturday at noon at the park since there’s a lot of bike paths there. You give her a bit of a weird look as she was pretty defensive but you don’t ask her about it.

Melissa keeps watching you bike away after school with a smile on her face.

Saturday at noon, you all show up with your bikes at the park. Melissa is the last to show up.

“Hey hon.” She tells you once she sees you and you turn around to face her with a smile.

“Hey Mel!” You tell her and beam.

“Alright so we should decide on a path and the distance.” Barb says and you all nod and settle on one after a few minutes.

Mel looks a bit worried when you turn to look at her. “You ok?” You ask her and she looks at you, everyone looks over at Melissa as well.

“Ya I’m fine, just I probably shouldn’t go that far. Don’t want to sprain something and then can’t walk for a few days.” She tells them all. “I think I’ll sit this one out.” She tells them and when they go to question her, she gives a glare and they all shut up.

They decide to just bike off without Melissa, except you. You hang back and Melissa looks at you with a quirked eyebrow. You look and see that everyone is just about out of sight and you look back towards Melissa.

“Shouldn’t you be biking alongside them?” She asks while still holding on to the bike.

“Maybe, but I’d rather stay here and help you learn how to ride it.” You tell her with a friendly smile. She looks at you confused.

“I already told all of youse that I know how to ride a bike, I just don’t wanna.” She says defensively again.

“Ok then prove it, use the kickstand.” You tell her and she looks at you confused.

“Kickstand?” She asks and you look at her with a knowing glance and you nod. Melissa looks at her bike, searching for what you could possibly mean.

“Mel…” you tell her and she looks at you as you get off your bike and you kick out the kickstand and let go of your bike. Melissa sees what you do and does the same thing then looks at you with a proud smile. It falls when she sees your face, you’re looking at her a bit sad.

“Did no one teach you how to ride a bike?” You ask her and she looks down at the ground, embarrassed.

“No, they didn’t.” She admits and you walk over to her.

“It’s ok to admit you know, I’m not going to judge you.” You tell her and she looks up at you. “If you want to learn then I can teach you.” You offer again and this time she smiles and accepts. You lock your bike up nearby and then you go back to Melissa. You show her how to sit on it properly and show her how to be when not in motion. Then you tell her how to ride. “It’s mostly about balance, like skating or balancing on one leg.” You tell her. “There’s a reason that the expression ‘just like riding a bike’ is so commonly used for stuff that you know how to do but it’s been awhile. It’s pretty straightforward.” You tell her and then you get off and tell her to try it.

You held on the bike with part of a handle and the seat the whole time so it wouldn’t fall over. Melissa got on just like you showed her and had one foot on the ground while still on the bike when she won’t be in motion just like you showed her and she looked at you for praise with a smile. You gave her a proud smile and a thumbs up and she beamed.

“Now here comes the tricky part, balancing yourself while pedalling. Now I’ll hold on the bike like I’ve been doing and you’re going to pedal ok?” You tell her and she nods. She then blushes when she realises that your hand keeps accidentally touching her butt and missed when you told her to pedal.

“Sorry what?” She asked when she sees you looking at her weirdly.

“I said you can start pedalling.” You tell her and she looks embarrassed then goes to try and start pedalling. She pedals slowly and crookedly and you manage to keep up with her to keep the bike up. “You’re doing it Mel, you’re biking!” You tell her and she has a huge smile. “Do you want me to let go and try and bike by yourself?” You ask and she widens her eyes.

“Uh no, I’m still trying to focus on pedalling and not balance.” She tells you and you smile.

“It’s alright, it’s at your pace.” You tell her without judgement.

You guys take a short break, mostly so you don’t tire yourself out.

“You’re learning it Mel, I bet by the end of today, you’ll be biking circles around all of us.” You tell her and she blushes and looks at the ground with a smile.

Turns out the first time you let go, she noticed how your hand touched hers on the handle and your other hand touched her butt and she lost focus and fell.

You ran to her and luckily she fell on grass. “You ok Mel?” You asked her and she looked embarrassed and had a pout. “Hey it’s ok. Most people fall the first person they try to pedal on their own.” You tell her. “I did.” You say and she looks at you.

“You did?”

“Ya, and I mastered pedalling by then. They took the training wheels off, I go to pedal, and fell right over.” You say with a laugh and she giggles. You then help her up and she blushes at the fact that you’re touching her. You on the other hand think her pink cheeks are embarrassment from falling. “Want to try again?” You ask her and she thinks, your hands still on her.

“I um, I don’t know.” She says, she can’t think properly with your hands on her.

“It’s ok if you don’t want to continue but I don’t want you to get discouraged because you fell on your first attempt.” You tell her genuinely. She decides to give it another try, and on the fifth attempt she was doing it. You were so proud of her. You ran after her and yelling “MELISSA LOOK YOU’RE DOING IT! OMG I’M SO PROUD OF YOU!” You yell as she’s going faster than you’re running. Melissa got flustered that you said you were proud of her and lost focus and fell.

You caught up to her and she fell on the pavement this time and scraped her hands. You kneeled down as soon as you caught up to her and took her hands in yours to inspect them.

“Oh they don’t look too too bad. But I think you should clean it to avoid infections.” You told her and she was looking at you with flushed cheeks. “What?” You asked her and you gently dropped her hands.

“N-nothing.” She said.

“Um ok.” You say confused. “But Melissa you did it! You rode a bike!” You excitedly told her and hugged her and Melissa froze. You pulled away and saw she looked tense. “Oh sorry, I should have asked to hug you. I’m just very proud of you.” You tell her.

“It’s alright, the hug was actually nice. I’m just not used to physical touch.” She says and looks down.

“I’m sorry.” You tell her and she looks up and gives a smile and whispers to you.

“I rode a bike.” She whispers excitedly and you smile.

“Ya you did. How about we go to my place and I can take a look at your hands and clean them. Unless you want to go back to your place and do it.” You said.

“Um, we could, um go back to yours.” She says, stuttering a bit and you nod.

You manage to get both your bikes in her car, somehow. You biked to the park since it’s only 15 minutes of bike riding away from your house. And you get back to your place and bring Melissa to your apartment. You get her to sit on the couch while you get cloths, a bowl of warm water, disinfectant and some bandaids. You bring them all to your coffee table and get her to hold your hands out. Looks like they were bleeding a bit.

You take one of the cloths and dip it in the water and then you wipe the scrapes on her hands. Once the bleeding stopped and the scrapes looked clean, you grabbed the disinfectant. “This might sting a bit.” You tell her and she nods. You put some on a clothe and wiped her hands. She did flinch a bit but other than that she seemed to be alright. You put a couple bandaids on her scrapes, where it was bleeding, and it looked alright. “Alright did you get hurt anywhere else and Melissa looked at you.

“Um nope.” She told you she avoided eye contact.

“Melissa…” You said and gave her a pointed look.

“I’m fine.” She said. You sat up a bit and adjusted your position on the couch so you’re on one knee.

“Melissa, where else does it hurt?” You asked and she crossed her arms and pouted. “Ok, if you’re gonna act like a child then I’ll treat you like one.” You told her and she looked at you and gasped in disbelief. “Either show me where it hurts or I’ll treat you like a child.”

“It’s one of my knees but I can’t roll up my pants to show you.” She tells you and you look at her with a “oh”.

“Well here.” You say and take the blanket on the end of the couch and cover her top part of the legs. You can take your pants off and still keep your modesty.” You tell her and she chuckles, she still takes her pants off and you see blood dripping down her right leg. “We should have made you wear elbow and knee pads.” You tell her and you get on your knees on the floor and get to cleaning her knee. Melissa sees you get on your knees in front of her and some fantasies make their way to her mind and she blushes. You look up and see her flushed face. “You ok?” You ask and she nods.

“Yep.” She says, voice a bit high pitched but you ignore it. You finish up with a bandaid on her knee. Just when she thinks it’s over, it isn’t.

“Oh I almost forgot!” You exclaim and hold your hair where it is, then bend down and give her a kiss on the knee next to where the bandaid is. She felt your lips on her knee and she blushed even more. “A kiss to make it better! Want me to do the same with your hands?” You asked her and she held out her hands. You kissed both of them better and her cheeks have turned from a pink to a red. You look up at her again and see her red cheeks. “Are you sure you’re ok? Are you running a fever?” You ask and feel her forehead with your palm. Oh if only you knew what you do to her. “You feel fine. I hope you’re not embarrassed, cause you don’t have to be.” You tell her and rest your forearms on her legs.

“Ya I’m…fine.” She said and give her a questioning look. “What?” She asked.

“Melissa? Are you hiding something from me?” You ask her and she avoids eye contact. “What are you hiding from me?” You ask her and you get up and bend over to rest your hands on her legs. And Melissa has a perfect view of down your shirt. She really has to focus on where her eyes look right now.” You notice how she stared at you, well more specifically down your shirt and her cheeks got even redder and avoided eye contact even more. You see how she keeps glancing at your hands near her thighs and she doesn’t know what to do. You decide to test a theory and move your hands subtly up her legs, near to that spot in between her legs and her breath hitches and her face feels like it could be on fire. You lean into her more and look at her eyes. “Melissa, something you’re not telling me?” You ask her with a slightly lower pitch voice and she’s breathing deeply right now. Just when you’re about to pull away, she grabs the back of your head and pulls you forward and gives you a kiss.

You’re stunned for a second but then kiss her back and Melissa is stunned. You’re kissing her back? She pulls back and looks at you and you’re smiling at her with soft heart eyes. “Do you like me back?” She asks you and you nod.

“Wait, does that mean you like me?” You ask her and she nods. And before you know it, both of you are surging forward and kissing each other. You end up straddling her lap and she deepens the kiss by slipping her tongue in when you grant access. Her hands roam all over from your chest to your knees. She feels so much of you and yet can’t feel enough of you. She tests the waters and puts her hands under your shirt and feels the skin on the side of your stomach and you don’t stop her. She roams her hands up and you two take a second to breathe before making out again. She continues to move her hands up and feels you smile. So you realise she’s moving her hands up and you’re happy about it. Does that mean she has your approval to unclip your bra? Just as she finishes that thought you unclip your own bra and she smiles. Just as she was about to go and touch your breasts, her phone rings loudly and it startles both of you.

“Hello?” Melissa answers and forgot to see who it was. She’s breathing a bit fast and you can see she’s trying to control it. So of course you decide to be a little shit and dive to her neck. “Oh Barb hi-i” she squeaks the last part out a bit as you decide to suck on her neck.

“Are you ok?” Barb says on the other line.

“Ya I’m fine, why?” Melissa says and tries to get you to stop but ends up holding your hair and letting you continue as it feels good.

“You sound breathless and like something surprised you.” Barb says gently and Melissa can’t think for a second as you removed your shirt and bra at the same time and she just stares. All she can think about is wanting to suck them. You begin grinding her leg and you nod your head to the phone and she suddenly remembered Barb asked her a question.

“Ya I’m fine just ya catching my breath, I ended up biking with y- y/n to her place since it’s like 20 minutes… instead of the-the 2 hour one you wanted to do. We just got back and I’m… catching mmmy breathe.” She stutters throughout the entire sentence as she just feels and sees you grinding her leg and you ended up leaning towards her so your breasts are almost in her face. You were torturing her and she knew it.

“You need to catch your breath after a 20 minute bike ride?” Barb asks and Melissa is really cursing in her head.

You decide to end her torture and grab the phone from her. “Hey Barb it’s y/n.” You say and Melissa decides to grab your breasts with her mouth and you pull the phone away from your mouth enough so that Barb doesn’t hear it.

“Oh hi y/n, is Melissa ok?” Barb asks.

“Mmhhmm.” You say since Melissa is teasing you now. “She’s alright, just she did 20 minutes to my place then 20 minutes back to her ca! Car.” You say as Melissa decides to rub your clit through your underwear and pants. “Ya so she’s fine.” You blurt out and hand the phone back to Melissa.

“Hey Barb, I caught my breath.” And Melissa is still rubbing your clit so you can’t tease her right now. You don’t pay attention to what Barb says and then hear Melissa talk again. “Ok, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” Melissa says then hangs up. “You.

Little. Minx.” She says to you and you smile. She rolls her eyes at you then pulls her hand away from your clit and you whine. She sits up with you still on her, your legs wrapped around her waist and her hand grabbing your ass. She brings you to your bed with you sucking her neck and then drops you on the bed.

“Ah.” You say as she actually dropped you on purpose. She crawls on top of you and leans in to your ear.

“You were a great teacher with me for biking. Now let me show you how I pleasure a woman.” She tells you and you shiver and rub your thighs together. She notices how you react and she smirks, she pulls back and looks at you. “And when I teach, I like for the person to tell me how well I’m doing.” She tells you and then takes her shirt and bra off and then makes you breathless all night.

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