#astarion x reader
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pinkberrytea ¡ 2 days ago
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Astarion is nervous, possibly even afraid that he is about to lose something—that you are about to lose something, something precious and dear to him.
I will live in thy heart, die in thy lap, and be buried in thy eyes.
Enjoyment beyond the death drive—beyond the self-imposed regulation of pleasure. He wants her, so desperately, so ardently; yet she escapes through his fingers like fine sand, falling on the ground and dissolving in the dirt above his grave.
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Astarion x Tav (F!Reader)
w/c: 3k words . ao3 . spotify playlist . 18+ only . nsfw . dividers
a/n: this is the sequel to la petite mort! while it was initially intended as a standalone oneshot, I wanted to expand on the themes introduced in the original. hopefully it lives up to its predecessor! thank you to the wonderful @xxnashiraxx for giving this one a read, I love you dearly friendo!
tags: blood drinking; hurt & comfort; possessive behavior; masturbation; hand jobs; body worship; dry humping
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“Astarion…?”
His name slips from your lips before you even open your eyes, your consciousness slowly returning as you are suddenly woken from restless sleep. You feel his naked chest pressed flat against your back, his cold skin robbing you of the warmth of yours; his strong arms encircling your waist, hands roaming your sides; and his fangs, sank deep into the crook of your neck as his wet tongue laps up your crimson, which leaks from the corners of his mouth, dripping down his jaw and onto your shoulders. There is no pain—rather, the sensation is almost pleasurable, familiar, which comes as no surprise considering it’s been months now ever since his nightly feeding sessions became a daily occurrence. You don’t even bother setting up your tent anymore; upon leaving the Shadowlands, he’d begin routinely insisting that you sleep in his, heedless of your mutual agreement to abstain from more carnal proclivities for the time being. “Oh, darling, wouldn’t you say it’s much easier for me to dine with you this way? Hard as it will be to keep my hands to myself, I did give you my word,” he’d say, and true enough, you had yet to go beyond very heated kissing and groping—regardless, here he is now, avidly drinking from you while grinding the throbbing bulge inside his pants against your rear.
“Shh. It’s alright, love. Go back to sleep.” Astarion unlatches from your bruising vein to whisper the words in your ear, and you are almost tempted to do just that, but it’s far too late; ignoring him or the erection poking at your backside is no longer an option, and he probably realizes that too, having stopped gliding his hands up and down your torso to gently rest them on your arms instead. You are wearing his shirt, a habit you’ve taken to in recent days—at first you’d lie and say it was because you didn’t want your own to become soiled with blood, though in truth you simply enjoy the intimacy of sharing clothes and the comfort of being enveloped in his scent. Despite seeing right through your excuses, Astarion didn’t seem to mind at all; quite the opposite, he appeared to enjoy the fact that you’d start sleeping clad in nothing but his shirt and your underpants, since oversized as it is, the length would be enough to cover your crotch and thighs. He likely didn’t factor in your agreement, of course—while convenient in most other circumstances, the ease of access wouldn’t exactly be conducive to chastity, so to speak.
Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you groan and twist your body to face him. He moves one of his hands to your scalp, lovingly running his slender fingers through your tousled hair and planting a bloodstained kiss on your temple. When he finally pulls away to meet your stare, a shiver unexpectedly runs down your spine; his pupils are blown out, almost completely eclipsing his sanguine irises, yet you can undeniably see something primal and hungry lurking in their depths. The candle you had lit before turning in for the night burns bright still, and the light of its dancing flame bounces off his sharp teeth, which had been puncturing your own flesh but moments ago. How easy it is to forget what the heart wants to deny—whenever the true nature of his vampirism rears its ugly head, you find yourself questioning your blind trust in him. Yet like a passing breeze, just as soon as that sliver of doubt weasels its way into your mind, it’s then gone; foolish though it may be, you don’t fear the darkness in him, not now, not when he first put a knife to your throat. 
“You’re not a victim. Not a target. Not just one night it’s better to forget.”
Tentatively, you reach out to lightly stroke his cheek, the pads of your fingers ghosting over his ivory skin. His eyelids flutter close as if by instinct, and he quietly leans into your touch, looking almost vulnerable for a moment. Ever so delicately, you trace the lines on his face, his high cheekbones, his cupid’s bow, his plush lips, which are parted still. It amazes you how his features can be at once so edged yet so soft, much like the man himself, in a way. No, you don’t fear him, even if he has given you no reason not to other than a heartfelt confession.
“I—I could help you, you know,” you hear yourself mumble, almost bashfully, a faint glow spreading across the bridge of your nose and warming the tips of your ears. “With that, I mean.” Astarion furrows his brow and his eyes flit back open in confusion, only to slightly widen as you coyly motion with your head towards his obviously tented pants. He looks down at his groin and then up at you, unsure of what to think, much less of what to say. It’s not often that he is left wanting for words, but then again, you were ever one to drag him out of his comfort zone. 
“You are full of surprises, aren’t you?”
“Oh, you little rascal.” Despite the initial shock, he quickly regains composure, almost too quickly. His expression abruptly changes, gaze laced with seduction and lips quirked upwards into a practiced smirk. “Who would’ve thought you’d be the first one of us to acquiesce? I’ll admit your innocent facade had me fooled, but you’re quite the needy thing underneath those big round eyes and blushing cheeks, aren’t you, darling?” he teases, voice lowering an octave, its cadence measured to an almost unnerving degree. Your mouth becomes dry and your stomach coils into a tight knot as you immediately recognize his sudden shift in attitude, a side of him you’ve come to know all too well and that disturbs you still—yet even more worryingly, his otherwise perfectly poised countenance seems to enshroud an emotion that had never been there before: anxiety. Astarion is nervous, possibly even afraid that he is about to lose something—that you are about to lose something, something precious and dear to him. 
“I don’t know how else to be with someone. No matter how much I’d like to.”
“No! That’s… I didn’t mean it like that,” you blurt out, heart fluttering in your chest, so loudly you are sure he can hear it. While you have never gone over the terms of your agreement or discussed them in-depth, you had always assumed that physical intimacy wouldn’t necessarily be off the table, especially the kind of intimacy that would require nothing of him. Although perhaps therein lies the problem—someone who perceives everything as transactional would naturally fail to accept that another would be willing to give without taking. Remorse washes over you as you realize your mistake, which you promptly try to mend, much as the guilt bars you from looking him in the eyes. “What I meant is… I can take care of it. For you.”
Astarion’s eyebrows slowly slide up his forehead and he studies you intently for what seems like an eternity, clearly taken aback. Before long, he finally breaks the silence, humming quizzically and untangling his fingers from your hair. “Hm? Is that right?” he hesitates, only to yet again flash you a sly smile, a much softer one this time, ruby irises twinkling with something akin to melancholy. “And how exactly do you plan to do that?” Despite provocatively purring each word, the tone with which he speaks is remarkably gentle, almost uncertain. Bringing a hand to your chin, he cups it delicately and tilts your head upwards, prompting you to meet his stare, its flirtatious edge now replaced with wistful warmth.  
“You deserve something real. I want us to be something real.”
You inhale sharply, your brief show of boldness having obviously run its course, and the pink flush coloring your ears deepens into a bright red. His smile widens once he notices your nervousness, and he brings his face even closer to yours, so close you can feel his lashes tickling the delicate skin under your eyes. His cool breath caresses your lips, the metallic scent of blood—your blood—wafting up your nose. Still cupping your chin, he at last closes the distance between you, covering your mouth with his and hooking a leg over your waist to pull your bodies flush together. With the swell between his thighs now nudging your belly, he starts leisurely rolling his hips, resuming what he had been doing before rousing you from your slumber.
“Hnng…” As you bury your fingers in his silvery curls, melting into the kiss and relishing the taste of him, Astarion lets out a muffled moan, low and throaty. Wetness starts pooling between your folds, though instead of indulging in the sensation, you try to ignore it to the best of your ability—tonight is not about you, and you want him to know this. Regardless, he can obviously smell your arousal, but far from causing any upset, it only serves to entice him further; sliding his free hand down your back, he firmly grabs one of your buttocks with a bruising grip upon reaching your ass, kneading it roughly. All this time, he’d been graciously accepting your generosity, and then some—he’s not about to stop now, not when for once he knows he hasn’t manipulated you into extending your kindness to him.
“It’s been so long since I’ve had to decide what I wanted.”
“Mngh—Astarion…” you mewl into his mouth, and he takes the opportunity to slip his tongue inside yours, fangs nipping at your bottom lip without breaking skin. You press one of your palms to his chest, feeling the firmness of his pectorals under the soft pads of your digits before gingerly sliding them downwards, raising a trail of goosebumps in their wake. Drawing small circular patterns, you slowly glide your blunt nails across the valleys of his ribs, his navel, and finally his lower abdomen, teasingly grazing the waistband of his pants.
“My, such a good little helper you are,” Astarion breaks the kiss to murmur against your reddened lips, and moving his hand on your chin down to grasp your own, he encourages you to venture under the waistband. Your fingers now intertwined with his, you let him guide you to the hardness pushing against his smallclothes, which are damp with precome, much like yours are damp with slick. You can feel the outline of his length through the thin fabric, and he unceremoniously has you both fist it, wiggling his hips so that his pants drop below the plump of his behind. 
“Such a good, selfless little helper…” he croons, sliding both of your hands up and down his still covered cock. With every pump, his groans grow huskier, small beads of sweat pooling in the creases of his forehead. His eyes are now closed, his mouth slightly parted, and his hold on your hand is strong, if not binding. Your dripping sex wantonly clenches around nothing at the sight of him, so hopelessly focused on his own pleasure; gods, how desperately you wish to be stretched open around his enlarged girth, stuffed full of him until you are both flailing for purchase, panting and screaming each other’s name. He may not be ready for that yet, but as your imagination wanders, you tell yourself that there’s no harm in picturing him taking you from behind, balls swinging and hitting your ass as he thrusts deep into your slit with reckless abandon; your lips wrapped around his flushed cockhead, one of his hands mercilessly tugging at your hair as he sings you praises; you bouncing on his lap, buttocks slapping against his legs with each bob of your body.  
“Astarion…” you moan, rubbing your thighs together to get some relief from that small amount of friction. His cock jerks under your combined hands, so hard now that his smallclothes are pulled back enough to reveal the swollen tip. How sweet is the sound of his name on your tongue, how sweet is the scent of your desire when he is the one you yearn for. Just as you fantasize about him, Astarion too keeps replaying all sorts of scenarios in his head—he hates that he can’t have you yet, that he can’t pin you to a wall or throw you on a table and fuck you until you beg him for mercy; he hates that he can’t watch your cute little tits jiggle as your tight cunt swallows him whole, that he can’t coax pretty noises out of your rosy lips and make your eyes water as you come for him. He hates that his lust for you is tainted, that his lust for you is what inspired him to choose you as his target in the first place. Most of all, he hates himself for having disregarded you as a beautiful fool; for having underestimated his own susceptibility to falling in love, for having even fallen in love at all. 
“You’re a vision. And you’re so much more than that.”
“Gods, I want to be inside you…” Astarion grunts, letting go of you to pull down his smallclothes, finally freeing his weeping erection. It glistens in the candlelight, red and hungry, and you waste no time wrapping your fingers around its base. A muted whimper falls from his lips once your warm skin collides with his, and he rolls his hips into your hand, to which you respond by lightly squeezing him, drawing pearly, sticky liquid from the twitching crown. “Gentle, darling…” he whispers, though his half-lidded eyes, hazy with want, show no sign of aggravation—despite the commanding tone of his voice, it’s safe to assume that the instruction is not so much a complaint as a suggestion. Regardless, you obey, stroking him softly and setting a sensual pace to your movements.
“That’s it. That’s it, love. Good girl…” With his newly freed hand, Astarion tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, tenderly brushing his long fingers against your cheek before inconspicuously running them down the elegant column of your neck. His gaze is immediately drawn to the fresh set of bite marks maculating your otherwise perfectly smooth skin, and he absentmindedly licks his lips upon noticing the ruby droplets blooming from the small wounds. His cock throbs against your palm as he lowers his head to plant a loving kiss on the spot earlier claimed by his fangs—which he then sinks again into the still seeping artery. This time, you feel a sharp sting, but as soon as he starts sucking, the pain fades away; he wraps an arm around your upper body to hold you in place as he drinks, cradling you against his chest, and his other hand quickly finds one of your breasts under your—his—shirt. Trapping its puckered peak between two deft digits, he pinches it playfully, and you are unable to stifle the whine that subsequently forms in the back of your throat.
“Asta—aah…” You try to remain focused on the task you’ve been entrusted with, tightening your grip on him to remind yourself that he is the priority, not you. This in turn causes him to moan against your neck and shove his hips forward; taking his reaction as a cue, you speed up the tempo of your strokes, which are now almost synchronized with the vigorous bobbing of his Adam’s apple. His hand on your breast gropes it passionately, all five of his fingers now splayed across its soft swell and digging deep into the squishy flesh. He wonders if it’s a deliberate act of provocation, or if you really are so naïve that you wouldn’t notice his ravenous stare whenever your nipples pebble and become visible through the white sheerness of his shirt. Knowing you, it’s probably the latter; he’s yet to meet anyone as oblivious as you are, and while he has learned to accept that this side of you is not necessarily a weakness, it also awakens in him a protective instinct—a possessive instinct. You may be prey, but you are his prey; his to feed on, his to fuck, his, and nobody else’s.
“Honestly, I have no idea what we’re doing. Or what comes next.”
Astarion bends the leg hooked around your waist to pull you even closer to him, and from the way his groans increase both in frequency and in volume, you can tell he is about to fall over the precipice of ecstasy. The glossy sheen of sweat covering his pale skin makes him look like a marble sculpture, an otherworldly creature, yet the ferocity with which he feasts on your crimson reveals him not touched by the divine, but consumed by sin. It’s almost ironic then, that sinful as his longing for you may be, it feels so pure, so sacred. Tension coils low in his stomach, and for once there is no guilt, no disgust, no contempt; only rapture, as if he were an apostate and your love a haven, a promise of sanctuary.
“But I know that this?”
You pump him one last time, and with a guttural growl, Astarion comes in your hand, spurting out ribbons of his seed all over his own abdomen and thighs. Unlatching from your neck, he doesn’t bother pulling away, bloodied lips still pressed against your heated flesh, and his hand that had been under your shirt joins the other as both of his arms fold around your midriff. You let go of his softening length to run your fingers through his curls, closing your eyes and trying to catch your breath, tiredness suddenly weighing down all of your limbs and anchoring them to your bedroll. Lulled by the gentle pounding of your heart, he too empties his mind and lets himself be engulfed by the warmth of your body, so soft, so inviting, so very alive. Your taste still lingers on his tongue, your lifeblood now mixed with his within his veins—as his happiness trickles down in rivulets of scarlet, yours soars into the starry night sky. 
“This is nice.”
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moonselune ¡ 2 days ago
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Hello! Hope all is well with you! I've been enjoying the sillier prompts lately and have been wondering for a while now about the companions' reactions to a wild-magic sorcerer Tav accidentally turning themselves into a potted plant, as can happen in actual dnd. This might be in combat, out of combat, or when no one's around to see until they realize Tav is missing and there's a new, Tav-sized plant at camp. Thanks for considering!
Ahahahaha I didn't know this because fun fact I have never played as a wild-magic sorcerer, the more you know
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Karlach:
The chaos of battle still hung thick in the air: the acrid tang of ozone from lightning spells, the metallic bite of blood, and the charred aroma of scorched earth. Karlach stood amidst the wreckage, her infernal engine humming faintly as the adrenaline of combat began to ebb. Wiping the sweat from her brow, she turned to look for you, her fiery grin ready to celebrate another victory with her partner.
Only, you were nowhere to be seen.
“Babe?” she called, her voice carrying over the clatter of armor and groans of the fallen. She scanned the battlefield, her sharp eyes darting between the bodies of your enemies. Her smile faltered. “Where the hells are you?”
It wasn’t like you to wander off mid-battle, even with the unpredictable nature of your wild magic. A sinking feeling settled in her gut, and she began to search, calling your name louder now.
Her gaze finally fell on a peculiar sight near the edge of the clearing—a potted plant. It was vibrant and oddly you-sized, perched precariously on the remnants of a crumbled wall. Karlach’s brows furrowed, her hands on her hips as she stared at it.
“What the…?” she muttered, stepping closer. There was something strangely familiar about the plant. Its broad leaves almost seemed to droop in a manner reminiscent of your slouch when you were feeling bashful, and the faint glow of magic that lingered around it screamed wild surge.
Her eyes widened as realization struck her like a bolt of lightning. “No way. No way.”
Dropping to a crouch in front of the plant, she inspected it closer.
“Oh, you’ve gotta be kidding me,” she whispered, reaching out to touch one of the leaves gently. It was warm, and she swore she could feel your presence within it. “Babe, is that you?”
The plant didn’t respond, of course, but Karlach groaned and dropped her head into her hands.
“What am I supposed to do with this?” she lamented, her voice muffled. “You go and turn yourself into a bloody plant? In the middle of a fight?”
She glanced over her shoulder to ensure the rest of the group was still occupied. No one had noticed your absence yet, and for that she was grateful. She wasn’t sure she could handle the jokes from Astarion or the endless concern from Gale right now. This was between you and her, dammit.
Sighing, she scooped the pot into her arms, holding it like she would hold you.
“Alright, love,” she said, her tone softening despite herself. “Let’s get you back to camp and figure out how to fix this, yeah?”
The trek back was… awkward. Karlach tried to hold the pot steady while simultaneously glancing around to ensure no one saw her cradling a plant like it was her most prized possession. She muttered under her breath as she went, half scolding you and half laughing at the absurdity of it all.
“Of all the things you could’ve turned into,” she grumbled. “Why not something cool, like a dragon? Or even a chair! I could’ve used you for a rest at least.” She looked down at the plant with a rueful grin. “But no, you had to go and be adorable even as a damn fern.”
By the time she reached camp, the rest of the party had begun to notice your absence. Shadowheart raised a questioning eyebrow as Karlach marched straight to your tent, the plant held tightly in her arms.
“Where’s—” Shadowheart began, but Karlach cut her off with a gruff, “Don’t ask,” before disappearing inside.
Once safely tucked away in the privacy of your shared space, Karlach set the pot down gently and sat cross-legged in front of it.
“Okay, love,” she said, her tone serious now. “I’m not exactly a magic expert, so I’m guessing this’ll wear off on its own, yeah? Just, uh… shake a leaf or something if I’m right.”
Nothing happened. She sighed and rubbed the back of her neck.
“Figures. You’d turn yourself into something that can’t talk back.” She reached out to stroke one of your leaves again, her touch tender. “I just hope you’re okay in there. You’re not, like, panicking, are you? ‘Cause I’m here, alright? I’ve got you.”
The hours ticked by, and Karlach stayed by your side, talking to you about everything and nothing. She recounted old stories of her time in Avernus, described the way the campfire crackled just outside, and even hummed a few bars of a tune you loved. She refused to leave, determined to be there the moment you returned to your usual self.
When the magic finally dissipated, it was abrupt. One moment, she was staring at the plant, and the next, you were sitting on the floor in front of her, looking disoriented but otherwise unharmed. Karlach blinked, then burst into relieved laughter.
“There you are!” she exclaimed, throwing her arms around you in a rib-crushing hug before you could even fully process what had happened. “Don’t you ever do that to me again, you hear?”
You groaned, your voice muffled against her shoulder. “Wasn’t exactly intentional,” you muttered, but the warmth in her embrace made it hard to feel anything but gratitude.
Karlach pulled back just enough to cup your face in her hands, her grin brighter than the campfire.
“You’re lucky I love you,” she said, her voice teasing but her eyes soft. “Even if you do have a habit of turning into houseplants.”
You chuckled weakly, leaning into her touch. “I’ll try to aim for something cooler next time.”
“Damn right, you will,” Karlach said, leaning in to press a kiss to your forehead. “But for now, you’re staying right here. No more wild magic shenanigans until I’m convinced you won’t turn into a cactus or something.”
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Minthara:
The camp was eerily quiet when Minthara returned from scouting the perimeter, her steps as measured and deliberate as ever. She had left you behind, trusting that whatever magical experiment had your attention at the moment was at least minimally controlled. You had assured her you would remain safe.
But as she entered the camp, her sharp eyes immediately swept the area—and you were nowhere to be found. A frown tugged at her lips, irritation brimming beneath her calm exterior.
“My love?” she called out, her voice low but commanding. There was no reply, only the faint rustling of wind through the trees.
Something was wrong.
Minthara’s grip on her weapon tightened instinctively as she strode toward your usual spot near the campfire. Her keen senses caught the faint trace of magic lingering in the air—chaotic, unpredictable magic. It clung to the clearing like a haze, setting her teeth on edge.
And then she saw it.
A potted plant, sitting innocently in the middle of camp. It was a strikingly odd sight—vibrant, lush, and entirely out of place. Minthara’s frown deepened as she approached, her eyes narrowing. Something about it felt… familiar. She knelt beside it, her fingers brushing one of the broad, leafy fronds.
Her instincts screamed at her, the strange magic and the peculiar timing sparking a suspicion she couldn’t shake.
"No," she muttered under her breath, her voice laced with disbelief and annoyance. "Surely not."
She circled the pot, scrutinizing it from every angle, her sharp mind piecing together what must have happened. The chaotic magic. Your absence. The plant’s unnerving resemblance to your height, even its oddly charming tilt to one side.
“By the Underdark” she growled, pinching the bridge of her nose. “You’ve turned yourself into a gods-damned plant.”
Minthara rose to her full height, her expression a mixture of exasperation and begrudging amusement. She paced back and forth for a moment, muttering to herself in clipped Drow. This wasn’t her first encounter with wild magic’s unpredictability, but seeing you reduced to foliage tested even her patience.
Finally, she stopped, crossing her arms as she glared down at the plant.
“You’d best hope this is reversible,” she said, her tone sharp but carrying a strange undercurrent of affection. “Otherwise, I’ll be forced to carry you into battle as a decorative shrub.”
The plant, of course, did not respond.
Minthara sighed deeply, a rare crack in her stoic demeanor. She crouched down again, this time with a softer touch, her fingers trailing over the edge of the pot.
“You do realize how much you worry me?” she murmured, her voice quiet now. “Vanishing without warning, leaving me to find… this.” Her lips twitched into the faintest smirk. “You’re lucky I’m fond of you, even when you’re at your most absurd.”
She lingered there for a moment, her crimson eyes studying the plant as though willing you to transform back through sheer force of will. Her mind raced with possible solutions—waiting for the magic to dissipate, seeking assistance from one of the more magically inclined companions, or even attempting to force the issue with a spell of her own. But none of those options sat well with her; the thought of leaving you in this state for even a moment longer than necessary gnawed at her resolve.
As the sun began to dip below the horizon, casting long shadows across the camp, the chaotic magic finally began to wane. A sudden burst of energy rippled through the air, and in an instant, the plant vanished—replaced by you, sitting awkwardly on the ground with wide eyes and a dazed expression.
“Minthara?” you said weakly, blinking up at her.
Her expression was unreadable as she loomed over you, her arms crossed once more. For a moment, she said nothing, letting the weight of her presence—and her silence—sink in. Then, with a sharp exhale, she extended a hand to help you up.
“You are a constant test of my patience,” she said, her tone icy but her touch firm and steady as she pulled you to your feet. “And yet, I cannot seem to stay angry with you.”
You rubbed the back of your neck, a sheepish smile tugging at your lips.
“Sorry about that,” you said, glancing at the now-empty spot where the plant had been. “Didn’t mean to… you know. Turn into a houseplant.”
Minthara rolled her eyes but allowed a small smirk to break through her stern façade.
“I suppose it’s a testament to your unique charm,” she said dryly. “Only you could find a way to make even wild magic this ridiculous.”
Her hand lingered on yours for a moment longer than necessary, her gaze softening as she studied you.
“Do try not to disappear on me again,” she said, her voice dropping to a near whisper. “I’ve grown quite accustomed to having you by my side… in a form that can actually hold a weapon.”
You chuckled, the sound warm and full of relief. “I’ll do my best.”
Minthara shook her head, a quiet laugh escaping her lips despite herself. “See that you do. Now, come. You owe me a drink to make up for this nonsense.”
She turned sharply, striding toward the campfire with her usual commanding grace. But as you followed, you caught the faintest trace of a smile lingering on her lip.
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Lae'zel:
Lae'zel stood amidst the aftermath of the battle, her chest heaving as she wiped a smear of blood from her cheek with the back of her hand. The final enemy had fallen beneath her blade, and the battlefield was silent save for the distant rustle of the wind through the trees. She turned sharply, her yellow eyes scanning the clearing for you, her battle partner and—more recently—her lover.
“Y/N” she barked, her voice firm as always, tinged with the expectation of a swift response. When none came, her brow furrowed. She swept her gaze over the terrain, spotting the bodies of your foes… but no sign of you.
Her grip on her blade tightened as unease prickled at the edges of her thoughts.
“Where are you?” she muttered, you had a habit of getting into trouble, especially with the erratic nature of your magic. This silence was unsettling.
It was then that her gaze landed on something odd—a potted plant, sitting upright amidst the debris and gore of battle. It was an odd sight, pristine and bright green in stark contrast to the carnage around it. Lae’zel’s frown deepened as she stalked over to it, her boots crunching on the ground. Something about the plant felt… familiar.
She stopped before it, staring down at its leaves. It was unusually large, roughly your height if she imagined it upright. The pot itself bore faint traces of magic that made her lip curl in suspicion.
“Ridiculous,” she growled. And yet, the chaotic nature of your magic whispered a possibility in her mind—a possibility so absurd she dismissed it outright. At first.
Then, she leaned down and poked the plant with her gauntleted finger.
The moment her finger brushed a leaf, a faint magical hum radiated from it, and Lae’zel’s eyes widened. Her sharp mind pieced together the evidence: your absence, the lingering magic, and the absurdity of a random plant appearing on a battlefield. She drew back with a look that was half exasperation, half incredulous disbelief.
“You have done this to yourself, haven’t you?” she demanded, glaring at the plant as though it could answer her. “Wild magic,” she hissed, her voice dripping with disdain. “You reckless fool.”
She straightened, planting her hands on her hips, her blade still dripping with the blood of her enemies. For a moment, she considered leaving you as you were, just long enough to impress upon you the consequences of your chaos. But the thought was fleeting, quickly overtaken by the frustration that you were not by her side in a form she could lecture properly.
Lae’zel crouched again, this time with a softer expression, though she still scowled.
“If you can hear me, you will fix this yourself,” she said firmly. “I have no intention of hauling a houseplant back to camp.”
The plant, of course, did not respond.
“Ugh.” Lae’zel threw her head back, muttering something sharp and guttural in Gith, likely a curse aimed at the unpredictability of magic. Despite her frustration, she carefully scooped the pot into her arms, grumbling under her breath as she did so. The weight was awkward but manageable.
She began the trek back to camp, her movements brisk and efficient despite the absurd cargo in her arms. Along the way, she muttered a constant stream of words, alternating between irritation and reluctant concern.
“You are fortunate I value you, even when you test my patience,” she said, glancing down at the plant. “Were you anyone else, I would leave you here to rot.”
When she reached camp, the sight of Lae’zel carrying a potted plant drew immediate attention. Shadowheart raised an eyebrow, Astarion stifled a laugh, and Gale opened his mouth to ask a question—only to receive a sharp glare that silenced him on the spot.
“Not a word,” Lae’zel snapped, setting the plant down beside the fire with a little more force than necessary. She pointed a finger at the pot as if addressing you directly. “You will undo this foolishness. Now.”
By sheer coincidence, the chaotic magic finally dissipated, a sudden burst of energy shook the camp, and you appeared where the plant had been—sitting awkwardly on the ground, blinking in confusion.
“Lae’zel?” you said, your voice tentative. She towered over you, arms crossed and glaring fiercely.
“You turned yourself into a plant,” she stated, her tone flat but laced with unmistakable annoyance.
“Uh… yeah,” you admitted, rubbing the back of your neck sheepishly. “I guess I did.”
Lae’zel stared at you for a long moment, her lips pressed into a thin line. Then, without warning, she grabbed your arm and hauled you to your feet.
“You are an utter fool,” she said, her voice harsh, but there was a flicker of relief in her eyes. “And you will explain how this happened—after you swear to me it will not happen again.”
You couldn’t help but smile at her intensity, even as you stammered out an apology.
“I’ll try,” you said, earning an unimpressed snort from her.
“‘Try’ is insufficient,” she snapped, but there was no real heat in her words. She studied you for a moment longer before pulling you into a surprisingly firm embrace, her grip strong but steady. “Do not make me worry for you again.”
The rare softness in her voice made your heart swell, and you nodded against her shoulder. “I’ll do my best.”
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Shadowheart:
The sun had just dipped below the horizon, casting the camp in a soft, dusky glow. Shadowheart returned from gathering water at the nearby stream, her steps light but deliberate as she moved toward the campfire. Dinner was her next priority, and after that, a quiet evening spent in your company. Or so she thought.
As she reached the camp, a strange sight stopped her in her tracks. Sitting near the fire, where she expected to find you lounging or reading, was… a potted plant.
Shadowheart blinked, her brow furrowing. The pot was large, almost comically so, and the plant itself had an odd, almost lively vibrance to it. Its fronds swayed gently in the evening breeze, and its size was distinctly you-shaped.
She set the water down and took a few tentative steps closer, her dark eyes narrowing as she examined the plant. Her fingers brushed one of the leaves, and a faint shimmer of magic danced across its surface. Recognition hit her like a gale-force wind, and she straightened up abruptly, staring at the plant in stunned silence.
And then she started laughing.
The sound was soft at first, a quiet chuckle bubbling up from her chest. But it quickly grew louder, filling the camp as she doubled over, one hand braced on her knee and the other clutching her stomach.
“Oh, gods,” she wheezed, barely able to get the words out. “You’ve done it now, haven’t you?”
She staggered back a step, trying to compose herself, but the sight of the potted plant sitting innocently near the fire broke her resolve. She collapsed onto a nearby log, her laughter ringing through the clearing.
“You—you turned yourself into a plant!” she exclaimed, her voice cracking with mirth. “How? Why? What—what were you even doing?”
The plant, of course, did not respond. Its fronds merely swayed as if in agreement, which only made Shadowheart laugh harder. Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes as she leaned forward, shaking her head in disbelief.
“You’ve outdone yourself this time,” she managed to say between gasps. “I didn’t think wild magic could be this ridiculous.”
For several minutes, she simply sat there, caught in a loop of laughter and attempts to calm herself. Every time she thought she had control, she’d glance at the plant again, and another wave of giggles would take her.
Eventually, she wiped her eyes and let out a long, shaky sigh.
“Alright, alright,” she muttered to herself, still grinning. “I suppose I should figure out how to fix this before someone else sees you like this.”
But instead of moving immediately to find a solution, she reached out and gently patted the pot, her touch oddly tender.
“You’re lucky I find you endearing,” she said, her voice soft with affection. “Even when you’re… this.”
She sat there for a while longer, her smile lingering as she studied the plant. The absurdity of the situation didn’t erase her fondness; if anything, it deepened it. You were chaotic, unpredictable, and utterly unique, and somehow, she adored every bit of it.
When the magic finally began to fade, the plant shimmered and morphed, and in a flash of light, you were sitting on the ground, blinking up at her with a sheepish grin.
“Uh… hey,” you said awkwardly, scratching the back of your neck. “Miss me?”
Shadowheart burst out laughing again, leaning back on the log as she shook her head.
“Oh, my love,” she said, her voice full of amusement and exasperation. “You never fail to surprise me.”
She stood and offered you her hand, pulling you to your feet with a smirk. “I’ll admit, I was tempted to leave you like that for a while longer. You made a rather charming plant.”
You groaned, your face heating. “Please don’t tell the others.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t dream of it,” she said with mock sincerity, though the mischievous glint in her eyes suggested otherwise. “But you might owe me a favor or two to ensure my silence.”
You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help smiling as she leaned in closer, her expression softening. “Just promise me you’ll try not to turn yourself into anything else for a while,” she said, her voice quiet but warm. “I’d rather have you by my side.”
You nodded, and Shadowheart’s smirk widened as she pressed a quick kiss to your cheek. “Good. Now, let’s get some dinner before you accidentally polymorph into a roast chicken or something.”
With a laugh, she led you toward the fire, her hand slipping into yours. Even as the evening went on, she couldn’t help but glance at you now and then, a smile tugging at her lips as she remembered the absurdity of the situation.
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Jaheira:
Jaheira had seen many strange and inexplicable things in her long life. She had battled liches, shaped the natural world, and lived through countless adventures that would leave lesser individuals trembling. But when she returned to camp after a morning spent tending to her druidic rituals, she did not expect to find a potted plant sitting conspicuously near the fire, in precisely the spot you usually occupied.
She froze, her keen eyes narrowing as she took in the odd sight. The plant was unusually large and vibrant, its leaves swaying gently despite the still air. Jaheira’s lips pressed into a thin line as a nagging suspicion bloomed in the back of her mind.
“Beloved?” she called out sharply, her gaze darting around the camp for any sign of you. The woods were silent save for the rustle of leaves, and there was no reply. Her frown deepened as she crouched beside the plant, reaching out to touch one of its leaves. The faint shimmer of residual magic confirmed her worst fear.
“By the gods…” she muttered, rubbing her temples. “Of course.”
Jaheira sank onto a nearby log, her expression shifting from incredulity to sheer exasperation.
“I leave you alone for one morning,” she said aloud, as if addressing the plant. “One morning, and this is what you manage to accomplish?”
The plant offered no response, its fronds swaying innocently. Jaheira leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees as she regarded it with a mix of frustration and reluctant fondness.
“Wild magic,” she said, her tone dripping with disdain. “I warned you, did I not? I told you to focus, to keep your chaos in check. But no, of course not. That would be too simple.”
She let out a long, weary sigh and leaned back, crossing her arms.
“What am I to do with you?” she muttered, shaking her head. “I cannot even lecture you properly in this state.”
Her gaze softened slightly as she studied the plant, her exasperation giving way to quiet concern. Despite her irritation, there was a tenderness in her expression—a deep-seated care that she could never fully mask.
“You are lucky I care for you, you ridiculous creature,” she said softly. “Otherwise, I might have left you here to contemplate your folly for a few days.”
Jaheira stood and began pacing, her sharp mind already working through possible solutions. She muttered to herself as she moved, alternating between frustration and practicality.
“Undoing wild magic,” she said, glancing at the plant. “An unpredictable mess, as always. I ought to leave you for Gale to sort out—he would likely enjoy the challenge. But no, no. This is our problem.”
She stopped pacing and returned to the plant, placing her hands on her hips. “If you can hear me, beloved, know this: when you return to your proper form, you will owe me twice over. For this, and for the worry you’ve caused.”
As if in response, the plant shimmered faintly, and Jaheira arched an eyebrow.
“Good,” she said, nodding. “Perhaps there is still some sense left in you.”
Moments later, the magic dissipated with a faint burst of energy, and you were suddenly sitting on the ground, dazed but otherwise unharmed. You looked up at Jaheira, blinking in confusion as you tried to process what had happened.
“Jaheira?” you said tentatively, your voice hesitant. “What—”
She held up a hand to silence you, her expression equal parts stern and amused.
“Do not speak,” she said firmly. “Not yet. First, you will listen.”
You nodded quickly, sensing the gravity of her tone. Jaheira crouched beside you, her sharp eyes locking onto yours.
“You will explain to me, in great detail, what foolishness led to this,” she said. “And you will swear to me that you will exercise more caution in the future. Do you understand?”
“Yes, my beloved,” you said meekly, your cheeks burning with embarrassment.
She studied you for a long moment, her gaze softening as she saw the genuine contrition in your expression. With a small sigh, she reached out and cupped your cheek, her thumb brushing lightly against your skin.
“You are fortunate I adore you” she said quietly, her tone laced with affection despite her stern words. “But you test my patience, beloved. Try not to make a habit of it.”
“I promise to try and not do it more than usual,” you promised with a cheeky smile, earning a faint smile from her.
“That's all I can ask for,” she said, rising to her feet and offering you her hand. “Now, come. There is work to be done, and I will not allow you to shirk your duties just because you decided to play at being a houseplant.”
You laughed softly, taking her hand and letting her pull you to your feet. As you walked together toward the campfire, Jaheira shook her head, a wry smile tugging at her lips.
“A potted plant,” she muttered. “What will you manage next, I wonder? A flock of chickens? A living puddle?”
Despite her exasperation, there was a warmth in her voice that made your heart swell. You knew you were lucky to have her by your side—someone who could scold you one moment and hold you close the next.
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Gale:
The sun had dipped low, casting the camp in soft, golden hues as Gale returned from a short stroll. He was humming a soft melody under his breath, a habit when he felt particularly at ease. However, his contentment was short-lived.
As he reached the campfire, he froze. His gaze fell on a peculiar sight: a massive, lush potted plant sitting exactly where you would typically be, its leaves trembling faintly as if caught in an unseen breeze. Gale’s sharp mind immediately pieced together the absurd possibility.
He stepped closer, squinting at the plant.
“My love?” he called tentatively, his tone a mix of disbelief and concern.
The plant, predictably, gave no reply. Gale knelt down, his hands hovering over the vibrant leaves as his brow furrowed.
“No. Surely not…” He reached out, his fingers brushing the leaves. A faint magical hum tickled his fingertips, confirming his suspicions. He sighed deeply, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “You’ve done it again, haven’t you? Wild magic… unpredictable as ever. Now what are you today? A ficus?” He tilted his head, examining the pot. “No, perhaps a monstera. Lovely choice, truly.”
His amusement was short-lived, replaced by determination as he straightened his back.
“No matter,” he said firmly. “We’ll have you back to yourself in no time. After all, what is a little magical mishap to someone like me?”
He moved swiftly, summoning his arcane focus. Arcane energy swirled around his fingers as he murmured incantations, his tone confident. A brilliant light enveloped the plant, the air around it crackling with energy. But as quickly as it had begun, the magic dissipated, leaving the plant unchanged.
Gale frowned, his brow furrowing deeper.
“That should have worked.” He muttered another incantation, this one more complex. Again, the air shimmered, and again, nothing happened.
Minutes turned into an hour as Gale tried every spell and counterspell he could think of. Each attempt left him more frustrated, his usually calm demeanor cracking. By the end, he was slumped on the ground beside the plant, his elbows resting on his knees as he gazed at it with a mix of exhaustion and defeat.
“I’m sorry,” he said softly, his voice heavy with guilt. “I thought I could undo this easily, but… I’ve failed you.” He reached out, his fingers brushing the rim of the pot. “You must be frightened, or bored, or both. And here I am, a so-called wizard of no small renown, completely stumped.”
As if in response to his heartfelt apology, a faint shimmer enveloped the plant. Gale sat up straight, his eyes wide as the glow grew brighter. With a soft poof, the plant vanished, and there you were, sitting cross-legged on the ground, blinking up at him.
“Gale?” you said groggily, your voice laced with confusion. “What… happened?”
His mouth opened and closed a few times before he let out a disbelieving laugh.
“You just… changed back?” he exclaimed, running a hand through his hair. “Just like that?”
You nodded, stretching your arms. “Guess it wore off.”
For a moment, Gale was silent, his expression caught between amusement and exasperation. Then he laughed again, the sound warm and rich as he reached out to pull you into a tight embrace.
“Oh, darling” he murmured against your hair. “You’ll be the death of me, you know that?”
You chuckled, leaning into his embrace. “Sorry for the trouble.”
He pulled back slightly, his hands cupping your face as he studied you intently.
“Don’t apologize,” he said softly, his gaze filled with affection. “Just promise me one thing: if you ever feel another surge of wild magic coming on, give me fair warning. I’d like to prepare for the possibility of, say, you turning into a boulder next time.”
You laughed, and he smiled, the tension from earlier melting away.
“Come,” he said, rising and offering you his hand. “Let’s have some tea. And maybe—just maybe—I’ll manage to go an entire evening without my lover surprising me with botanical transformations.”
His teasing tone made you grin as you took his hand, and together, you walked back to the campfire, the chaos of the day fading into a memory you’d both cherish.
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Astarion:
The sun was beginning to set, casting long, golden shadows over the camp as Astarion strolled back from his usual evening preparations. His step was light, his crimson eyes bright with their usual mischievous glint, but his mood faltered when he reached the center of camp. You were nowhere to be seen.
He tilted his head, scanning the area.
“Darling?” he called, his voice lilting with curiosity. “Where are you? Surely you haven’t wandered off. I thought we agreed that you’d stay within earshot.”
Silence greeted him, save for the distant rustling of the trees. His lips pressed into a thin line as irritation bubbled to the surface. But just as he was about to set off in search of you, his eyes fell on something strange near the fire—a large potted plant. A frown tugged at his features as he approached, his sharp eyes narrowing.
The plant was tall, lush, and vibrant, and its size was suspiciously… familiar. Astarion crouched beside it, reaching out to touch a leaf. His fingers brushed the frond, and a faint hum of chaotic magic tickled his senses. He froze, realization dawning as his mouth fell open.
“No,” he said flatly, staring at the plant as if it had personally insulted him. “You didn’t.”
The plant, of course, did not respond.
“Oh, for the love of—” Astarion cut himself off, straightening with a sharp sigh. He pinched the bridge of his nose, muttering under his breath. “This is why I can’t leave you alone for five minutes. I go to sharpen my daggers, and you decide to… become a houseplant.”
He paced around the plant, muttering dramatically to himself. “This is my life now, isn’t it? Hauling around my lover in botanic form. I must admit, this is a new low, even for us.”
Despite his exasperation, there was a thread of affection woven through his words. After all, this was you—his beloved, his partner in chaos. And as much as he wanted to leave you here to stew in your own magic, the thought of someone stumbling upon you while you were vulnerable gnawed at him.
“Well,” he said, planting his hands on his hips, “if you think I’m leaving you here to be stolen by some overly enthusiastic druid or trampled by a stray owlbear, you’re sorely mistaken.”
He crouched again, wrapping his arms around the pot.
“You’re heavier than you look, you know,” he grumbled as he hefted it into his arms. He staggered slightly under the weight before finding his balance, his fangs flashing in a sarcastic grin. “Oh, darling, you’re lucky I adore you.”
Thus began one of the most absurd nights of Astarion’s life. With you—now a potted plant—tucked securely in his arms, he set off toward the group’s meeting point, his gait steady but laced with a dramatic air of martyrdom.
“This is humiliating, you know,” he said, glancing down at the plant. “If anyone sees me like this, I’ll never live it down. ‘Oh, there goes Astarion,’ they’ll say, ‘dragging his decorative lover into battle.’”
When he reached the rest of the group, their reactions were predictably varied. Shadowheart raised an eyebrow, Gale rubbed his temples, and Karlach burst into loud, raucous laughter.
“What in the Hells happened to Tav?” Karlach asked between laughs, clutching her sides.
“They happened to themselves,” Astarion replied dryly, shifting the pot in his arms. “Wild magic. Again.”
“Oh, that’s rich,” Karlach wheezed. “You carrying them around like that!”
“Yes, yes, laugh it up,” Astarion said with a roll of his eyes. “But don’t think I’m letting them out of my sight. If they’re going to make a habit of turning into houseplants, they’ll do it under my watch lest they get molested by the local wildlife.”
Despite his snark, Astarion was true to his word. He carried you everywhere that night—through camp, during patrols, and even to his tent when he finally settled down to rest. He set the pot down beside him, adjusting it with care before sprawling out on his bedroll.
“Well, my love,” he said, his voice quieter now, “I hope you’re enjoying yourself in there. You’re certainly causing me enough trouble.”
He leaned back, his crimson eyes softening as they rested on the plant. “But, as irritating as this is, I suppose it’s… endearing, in its own ridiculous way. Only you could find a way to make this charming.”
As if on cue, a faint shimmer of magic enveloped the plant. Astarion sat up, his eyes narrowing as the light grew brighter. Then, with a soft poof, the plant was gone, and there you were, sitting on the ground, disoriented but whole.
“Astarion?” you murmured, blinking up at him.
He stared at you for a long moment, his expression unreadable. Then, with a dramatic groan, he flopped back onto his bedroll.
“You absolute menace,” he muttered, though the corners of his mouth twitched in a reluctant smile.
You chuckled, crawling over to sit beside him. “Thanks for not leaving me behind.”
He turned his head to look at you, his crimson eyes glinting. “As if I’d ever let anything happen to you,” he said softly. “Though next time, darling, do try to keep yourself… human-shaped. For my sanity, if nothing else.”
You laughed, and he sighed, reaching out to pull you close.
“Come here, you absurd, wonderful disaster,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I suppose I’ll just have to love you as you are—potted plants and all.”
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Wyll:
The inn was a cozy, bustling place, alive with the clatter of mugs and the hum of conversation. Wyll, ever the gentleman, had rented a room for the two of you after a long day’s travel. He’d left you in the corner of the common room momentarily, promising to return after he spoke with the innkeeper.
When he came back, you were gone.
His brows furrowed, his gaze darting around the room.
“My love?” he called softly, his voice carrying just enough for you to hear if you were nearby. “Where have you gotten off to?”
No response. His eyes scanned the crowd, then the quieter corners of the room. There, near the hearth, was a potted plant—a lush, green monstera—placed exactly where he had left you. He could have sworn there was only one monestera by the heart but now it seemed to have a friend. He paused, staring at the new plant with suspicion.
It couldn’t be, could it? He took a cautious step closer, noting the faint hum of magic still lingering in the air. His heart sank, and he let out a long, resigned sigh.
“Wild magic,” he muttered, crouching down to inspect the plant. “Of course. You’ve turned yourself into a… rather fetching monstera, I’ll give you that.”
Wyll ran a hand through his hair, glancing around to ensure no one else was watching him talk to a houseplant. He leaned in closer, his expression softening as he whispered, “Love, if that’s really you, don’t worry. I’ve got this under control.”
Scooping the plant into his arms, he carried it upstairs to the room. It was awkward—pottery wasn’t exactly easy to cradle—but Wyll managed, setting the plant down gently on the small table by the window.
“There,” he said, brushing a few flecks of dirt from his gloves. “Safe and sound.”
For the next few hours, Wyll did his best to care for you—or what he thought was you. He watered the plant carefully, ensuring the soil was just moist enough, and even adjusted its position so it could catch the evening sunlight streaming through the window. He pulled up a chair, resting his chin in his hand as he spoke softly.
“I know this must be frustrating,” he said, his deep voice filled with sympathy. “Being stuck like this. But you’ll be back to your old self in no time, I promise.”
He leaned back, arms crossed as he continued his one-sided conversation. “You know, I always did think you had a natural beauty about you—though I must admit, I never imagined it quite so literally.” He chuckled at his own joke, the sound warm and gentle.
Downstairs, however, the real you—still in potted plant form—sat abandoned near the hearth. A kind innkeeper had noticed you and moved you closer to the bar, thinking you were just a decorative piece. It wasn’t until Karlach wandered into the inn later that evening that someone finally noticed.
Karlach, who had been looking for both you and Wyll, stopped in her tracks when she spotted the plant. Her eyes narrowed suspiciously.
“Wait a second,” she muttered, crouching down. Her hand brushed a leaf, and the faint hum of magic confirmed her suspicions. “Oh, you’ve gotta be kidding me.”
Grinning, she scooped up the plant with ease and made her way upstairs, throwing open the door to Wyll’s room.
“Oi, Blade of Frontiers!” she called, her voice ringing with amusement. “Care to explain why you’ve been sweet-talking a normal plant while the real Y/N was stuck downstairs?”
Wyll, who had been mid-sentence in his heartfelt monologue to the decoy plant, froze. His eyes darted between the monstera in Karlach’s hands and the one sitting on the table. Realization dawned, and a flush of embarrassment crept up his neck. He must have mixed them up when he was thinking about the plants.
“Oh,” he said, standing abruptly. “Oh no.”
Karlach set the real you on the floor with a laugh. “You’ve been flirting with a houseplant, Wyll. I can’t decide if that’s adorable or just plain tragic.”
Wyll let out a groan, running a hand over his face. “I thought I was being attentive! Caring! I—I even watered it.”
“You watered it?” Karlach doubled over with laughter, slapping her knee. “Oh, Y/N's gonna love this story.”
As if on cue, the magic around you shimmered, and with a soft poof, you were yourself again. You blinked, disoriented, as Wyll dropped to his knees beside you.
“My love!” he exclaimed, relief flooding his face. “You’re back. Thank the gods.”
You looked between him and the monstera on the table, piecing together what had happened. A slow smile spread across your face. “You were… talking to the wrong plant?”
Wyll groaned again, burying his face in his hands. “Don’t remind me.”
Karlach was still laughing in the corner. “Oh, this is gold. Absolute gold.”
Despite his embarrassment, Wyll reached out to pull you into a tight hug, holding you close.
“I’m just glad you’re alright,” he murmured, his voice soft. “Even if I made a fool of myself.”
You smiled against his shoulder, your heart swelling with affection.
“Thanks for taking care of… well, something,” you teased gently. He pulled back just enough to look at you, his expression tender.
“Always,” he said, a faint smile tugging at his lips. “Though next time, do me a favor and give me a hint, would you? I’d rather not make a habit of serenading the wrong foliage.”
Karlach let out a snort from the doorway, and the three of you dissolved into laughter.
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Halsin:
The forest clearing was quiet, save for the faint rustling of leaves in the breeze. Camp had been peaceful for once—no goblin raids, no cursed relics, just the calm embrace of nature. Halsin had stepped away to check the nearby stream for fish, leaving you to experiment with your magic. You’d promised to be careful.
You weren’t careful.
When Halsin returned, carrying a string of freshly caught trout, he immediately noticed something was off. The air around camp felt strange, the energy shifted. His sharp eyes scanned the area for you, but instead of your familiar figure, there was… a potted plant sitting in the middle of camp. A magnificent fern, its leaves vibrant and swaying slightly as if caught in an unseen wind.
He paused, brow furrowing.
“My heart?” he called cautiously, setting the fish down. When no answer came, his gaze settled on the fern. The faint shimmer of wild magic clinging to it made understanding dawn. A slow smile spread across his face.
“Ah,” he muttered, walking over to crouch by the plant. “Wild magic has claimed you again, my heart.”
He gently brushed a large leaf with his fingertips, marveling at how alive it felt.
“You have excellent taste in flora,” he remarked, his tone warm with amusement. “A fern suits you. Strong, resilient… perhaps a bit mischievous.”
Settling beside the pot, Halsin crossed his legs and rested his elbow on one knee, chin in his hand.
“I suppose this is as good a time as any to remind you of the importance of grounding yourself before experimenting with magic,” he mused, though his voice carried no trace of reproach. “Not that you’ll be able to argue with me right now.”
Despite his humor, Halsin’s instinct to care for you took over. He carefully examined the soil, testing its dampness with a practiced hand.
As the evening wore on, Halsin moved you to a sunnier spot, adjusting your position as the light shifted. He kept up a steady stream of conversation, as though you were still in your usual form.
“I’m reminded of a time in the grove,” he said, his deep voice rumbling. “We had a druid who accidentally turned herself into a willow sapling. The children tied ribbons to her branches before anyone realized. She was furious—but she did make quite a beautiful tree.”
At one point, a squirrel approached, chittering curiously at the strange new plant in the camp. Halsin waved it off with a soft laugh. “Move along, friend. This one is spoken for.”
By the time dusk began to fall, he had arranged a small circle of stones around your pot, creating a makeshift shrine of sorts. It was a gesture born of care, a way to ensure you were safe and undisturbed.
As the stars began to twinkle above, the shimmer of magic around you intensified. Halsin, ever attuned to such things, noticed immediately. He knelt beside you, watching as the transformation took hold. With a soft poof, you returned to your usual self, sitting cross-legged where the pot had been moments before.
You blinked in disorientation, glancing around before meeting Halsin’s golden-brown eyes. He was smiling, warm and full of quiet amusement.
“Welcome back,” he said softly.
You groaned, rubbing your temples. “I turned into a plant again, didn’t I?”
Halsin chuckled, offering you a hand to help you to your feet. “You did. A particularly lovely fern, if I may say so. I’ve spent the better part of the day tending to you.”
Your cheeks flushed as you noticed the circle of stones. “You didn’t have to go to all this trouble.”
He raised an eyebrow, his smile deepening.
“How could I not? You’re my heart, no matter your form.” He stepped closer, resting a hand gently on your cheek. “Besides, it gave me an excuse to dote on you.”
You laughed softly, leaning into his touch. “I’ll try to keep the wild magic under control next time.”
“Do as you must,” he said, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead. “But know that if it happens again, I’ll be here. I’ll always care for you, no matter how many leaves you sprout.”
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Managed to get this one out for you all, I am hoping to post a christmas BG3 imagine post thingy at some point, my life is just chaos rn. Thank you all for checking in on me, I truly appreciate every single one of you. Hope you enjoyed this! - Seluney xox
If you want to support me in other ways | Help keep this moonmaiden caffeinated x
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libbybee ¡ 2 days ago
Text
FEEDING THE HUNGER — AA
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warnings. 18+ wc 2.2K fem!reader, vampire ascendant, predator/prey, piv, bite kink, blood, bodily fluids, masochism, dirty talk, marks, cock riding, overstimulation, creampie.
synopsis. fangs pierce flesh, blood is exchanged.
A/N. english isn't my native language, sorry if there are grammar mistakes.
AO3 ┊ MASTERLIST ┊ PLAYLIST ┊ IMG
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“Just look at you, riding me like this,” he growled harshly, sliding his hands down your thighs to grip your ass and squeeze it as he directed you more rigidly onto him. “Gods, your cunt feels like heaven. So tight, so fucking perfect for me.”
You straddled him with abandon, making the sound of skin meeting skin resonate through the bedroom. Astarion’s cock was filling your cunt completely; each thick vein pulsed against your tight walls, and every thrust felt so deep it made you see stars. You gripped his waist, and your nails left red trails across the pale beauty of his skin, while his crimson eyes devoured every inch of you.
The hunger in his stare was matched by the soft groans that escaped from his lips—low and rough, like a melody only meant for you. But you? You couldn’t match his restraint. Your moans were utterly shameless, as every thrust forced your core to accommodate his full length. It stirred a deeper fire in your lower belly as you rubbed your folds against him, making the coarse white hair at the base of his cock grind against your clit, hitching your breath.
His lips twisted into a wicked smirk at your reaction. “Ah, there it is,” he purred. “That delicious moan from those lips. Don’t stop, beautiful; give me more.”
You undulated your hips faster and more fervently at his request, and your head went back as the pleasure coiled tighter within you. And Astarion didn't waste a single second; he surged forward to brush his lips against the column of your neck, yanking your hips down and thrusting his up into you, drawing a gasp from you.
“You’re irresistible,” he rasped, scraping his teeth along your neck to tease you before biting down on your pulse vein and stealing a quiet, tortured moan from your lips.
The sharp point of his fangs gave way almost instantly to a burning ecstasy as his lips sealed over your skin. The bite made you shiver and warmed every nerve with pleasure as he drank your blood. Each pull of his lips was like fire, an intoxicating blend of pain and rapture that left you trembling.
A guttural groan vibrated against your neck just as his cock drove into you with wild intensity. The cruel rhythm of his thrusts mirrored the raw hunger in his feeding, but you weren’t his lamb—you were his equal, and you were to remind him of that.
You tangled your fingers in his silvery hair to tug hard enough to pull his head back and expose the line of his throat. His eyes blazed with desire and surprise as you leaned in, brushing his skin with your lips before your tongue traced the pulse of his vein. Then you sank your fangs into him.
Astarion’s reaction was instant and feral—a delicious growl ripped from him and made your walls clench involuntarily around him. His hands intensified their grip on your hips, digging into your flesh as he drove you down onto his cock, still grinding your sensitive cunt against the rough hair at his base.
“Fuck,” he muttered, the word rolling off his tongue like sin. “Savour it, darling. Sink your teeth deeper. I'm yours.”
The taste of his blood was rich and stimulating, like the finest wines. Each drop seemed to emanate an otherworldly vitality, seeping into you and making your pulse race. Every touch of his hands and every thrust of his hips became sharper and more electric, as if his scarlet magnified all sensations.
You took more of his addictive elixir, relishing the way it warmed you. He groaned low and guttural while he kept driving into you; each piston-like thrust made you tremble in his grasp, overtaken by the dual ecstasy of feeding from him and being well fucked.
A need to share this intimacy and give as much as you were taking surged from you. And without pulling back, you lifted your wrist to his lips to silently invite him to feed, too.
His eyes now flashed with a feral hunger, and he took up your offer, grasping your wrist gently at first to caress with his lips the delicate veins under your skin. “You spoil me with such a precious gift,” he uttered. “My perfect consort...” He purred before sinking his fangs into it without hesitation, drawing a sharp exhale from you as the bite provoked a new layer of pleasure.
Astarion’s groans became rougher and more primal, gripping your ass to guide you down harder and grinding your swollen clit against his pelvis. The combination of pain, stimulation, and intoxicating feeding sent you rushing towards ecstasy.
When you pulled back, his blood left a trail down your chin from your lips, and he released your wrist, immediately darting his fingers to your chin to grip it firmly. Crimson smeared his lips as well, and his lustful gaze locked onto you with a yearning that bordered on vicious, pulling you into a kiss so passionate and lascivious it stole the breath from you.
His tongue plunged into your mouth, eager to seek the precious elixir you had just shared. The taste of mingled blood was nothing short of intoxicating—sweetened but complex, with notes reminiscent of a full-bodied red wine aged to perfection. It carried the richness of a smoky undertone that lingered on the palate and a metallic sharpness that cut like the icy texture of iron. The flavour was vibrant and lush, like a symphony of death and lust that coursed through your senses, leaving you light-headed and irresistibly eager for more.
Astarion groaned against your lips, his pleasure raw with each drag of his tongue against yours, delving his tongue deeper to draw out every trace of the nectar. It was as if the mingled blood fed not just his hunger but his soul, and each flick of his tongue, every fervent press of his lips, was a testament to his insatiable thirst.
His reddish irises burnt when he pulled back for the barest moment, with a faint hint of the mixed blood on his lips. Then he surged forward again to kiss you, leaving no doubt that he was utterly lost in the taste of you—utterly lost in you.
His lips curled against yours as he slid one of his hands between your bodies to find your puffy clit and rub circles against it that matched his pace. And your cunt tightened around him, causing you to break the kiss when your moans turned into desperate, broken sounds just when your climax was about to collapse within you.
“There is nothing sweeter than this,” he said, a filthy growl against your lips. “And you’re mine—completely, eternally mine.” He dragged his sharp fangs along your bottom lip to draw out more of your blood and soothe the fresh cut with his tongue.
“I’m yours,” you whispered between desperate gasps against his lips, gripping his hair with one of your hands and his nape with the other as you rocked yourself against him. “Every part of me belongs to you.”
His eyes darkened as he looked at you, a wicked smile spreading across his lips. “My beautiful treasure,” he purred, delighted. “I never tire of hearing you say it.” He groaned against your neck as he trailed hungry kisses along it.
“Keep riding me like the good girl you are,” he said, his tone thick with lust. “Let me feel that sweet, tight cunt soaking me while you milk my cock, darling.”
You planted your hands against his chest, feeling his body tense beneath your palms while you rocked your hips against his. Rolling them in a way that allowed you to feel every thick vein pulsing along his shaft as it dragged against every sensitive spot within you, his hips snapping up to match your pace. Seizing your waist with his hands to guide you rougher and stretching your cunt with his cock, being almost too much while it fed the fire in your belly until you thought you might combust.
The pace ripped a deep, primal groan from him, and you heard it as if it were a spark that started a wildfire inside you, raising your desire to fuck him faster and harder. The slick and obscene slaps of your bodies colliding through the room created a symphony of passion that made you flush and your core clench with each thrust.
“Astarion,” you moaned as if his name were a last-ditch appeal on your tongue while your fingernails swept across his chest in a fruitless effort to anchor yourself. All he could do was smirk maliciously in enjoyment as you streaked his skin with bright red.
As his fiery gaze ate up your quivering body, a savage snarl escaped his lips. “So fucking tight,” he grunted. “Taking me so beautifully.” The head of his cock hammered your cervix as he drove up violently, his hands tightening on your hips. “I can feel how badly you need this, how desperate you are to be filled by me.”
His words sent you out of control, making your thighs shake and the knot of pleasure in your core growing more and more intolerable. Your body acted on its own, grinding against him with impulsive abandon, stoking the inferno within you.
Astarion's grasp became bruising as he sensed your unwinding, his sharp fangs grazing the tender column of your throat. “Drench my cock, my treasure,” he growled against you. “Don’t hold back, love. Let me feel you.”
You came completely undone by the tidal wave of ecstasy that erupted from the tone of his voice, feeling a dazzling explosion of pleasure as your walls clenched around him with an intensity that seemed to pull him even deeper within you. The heat of your release surged through you, carrying you higher until you felt as if you might dissolve in the sheer force of it. Your moans were a sound of unadulterated bliss, uninhibited and pure.
Astarion's climax followed yours due to your pussy's intense, frantic hold on his cock. His growls became savage as he used a bruising grip to pull you down onto him and settle himself completely inside of you. As his cock reached its maximum hardness, you could feel the distinctive throbs of it. Then it happened—spurts as he came into you.
The sensation was intense, your already sensitive body responding to the warmth of his climax as it spread deep inside your walls. It was electrifying—an intimate bond shared between you that left you trembling. You could feel every pulse of his tip against your cervix and each involuntary twitch of his hips as he grounded himself deeper, ensuring no drop was spared.
His abrupt groan was your name falling from his lips, a sound raw with satisfaction and lust. You shivered against him, slumping forward to rest against his chest, both of your breaths mingling as you fought to steady yourselves.
His hands softened their hold, sliding up your sides in a tender caress as his eyes bore into yours, dark with lust. “My perfect little consort,” he rasped. “Milking me dry like you’re starving for it.”
Your bodies remained intertwined, his cock still nestled deep inside you, as if the mere thought of separation were cruel in your bond. He roamed your body with his hands lazily, tracing the swell of your hips as if cherishing your body anew. His lips sought yours, capturing them in a kiss that was no longer driven by hunger but by a slower, more profound need. Something achingly sensuous.
The press of his mouth against yours deepened, sliding his tongue against yours in a longing dance. When he finally pulled away, a thin trail of saliva connected your lips.
Then his pelvis surged upward to drive himself deeper into you once more, and his lips twisted into a smirk as he felt the aftershocks of your climax on your cunt. His eyes, half-lidded, locked onto yours, their intensity softened by adoration.“Oh, you’re not done yet, are you, darling?”
His hands slid from your hips to your waist and your breasts to graze your sensitive nipples with his thumbs, drawing a soft sigh from your lips. A low hum of satisfaction escaped him. “You’ve been so good for me,” he praised. “And yet... you keep me wanting.”
A flush spread across your cheeks, and you cupped his face with both hands. “And I’ll always give you more,” you whispered sweetly against his lips.
His smirk altered into something softer as he leaned in to brush his lips against your jaw and trail kisses down your neck. His hips shifted slightly to press more deeply into you, making you both gasp softly at the overstimulation. But this time, there was no rush, just his slow thrusts that spoke of his need to prolong your pleasure.
“Good,” he interjected smoothly, curling his lips into a pleased smile against your skin. “I’d hate to think of anyone else touching what’s mine.”
Your hands slid down to rest on his chest, feeling the faint thrum of his pulse beneath one of your palms. “You’ve ruined me, Astarion,” you claimed. “No one else could ever—”
‎
96 notes ¡ View notes
dez78 ¡ 2 days ago
Text
Astarion's Confession
-----------------------------
Fandom: Baldur's Gate 3
Pairings: Astarion x Fem! Elf Tav
Warnings: Vulnerability
Additional Tags: Astarion is vulnerable, Astarion angst to fluff, hurt to comfort, friends to lovers
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(Not my gif)
Tumblr media
You stood in the dim light, your eyes softening as you listened to Astarion’s confession. The mask he so often wore had slipped, revealing the raw pain beneath. His voice, typically laced with sarcasm and wit, trembled as he spoke of the horrors he’d endured as a vampire spawn, of the helplessness he felt, and the countless years spent in torment.
Your heart ached for him, for the man who so rarely allowed himself to be vulnerable, and yet here he was, exposed, as fragile as anyone else. Without thinking, you took a step forward. Astarion’s gaze met yours, and for the first time, there was no trace of his usual arrogance, only the haunting weariness of a soul burdened by the past. Gently, you extended your arms, pulling him into a warm embrace. He tensed for a moment, as though unsure how to react, before he melted into you, his breath shallow against your shoulder.
The quiet between you was comforting, a shared moment of understanding without words. You could feel the tremors in his body, the weight of his sorrow. You held him tighter, offering him the solace he so desperately needed but had never asked for.
When you finally pulled away, Astarion’s hands lingered on your arms, reluctant to let go. His eyes, normally sharp and calculating, were soft, the silvery strands of his hair falling across his forehead.
"Don’t go," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "Not yet. Just... a little longer, please."
Your heart fluttered at the quiet plea. You could see the vulnerability in him—so raw, so real—and it pulled at something deep within you. With a tender smile, you wrapped your arms around him once more, letting him hold onto you as long as he needed.
For once, there were no masks. Just two souls, quietly offering comfort to one another in the stillness of the night. As you held him, you could feel the subtle tension in Astarion’s body begin to dissipate, his movements gradually becoming less restrained.
It was as though your embrace had stripped away every last layer of the armor he’d worn for centuries. And then, without warning, his breath hitched. A soft sob escaped his lips, barely audible, but it shattered the quiet. You froze, your heart skipping a beat. You had never seen him like this—not once. The sharp, perfect exterior he so carefully maintained was gone, and in its place, there was only the broken man he had kept hidden from the world.
Astarion’s body shook as the sobs came faster, uncontrollable, ragged. His hands gripped you tightly, as though you were the only thing keeping him tethered to the present, the only thing grounding him in a reality where he could finally let go.
Your breath caught in your throat. You had seen him laugh, flirt, and even fight with the ferocity of a predator, but this... this was something entirely different. You had never seen Astarion cry, not even close. His vulnerability in this moment took you completely by surprise, and your mind struggled to process it.
His forehead pressed against your shoulder, his tears soaking into your tunic, but you held him steady, not daring to move, not daring to break the fragile moment. You could feel the warmth of his tears against your skin, and the quietness of his sobs echoed through your chest like a silent drumbeat, painful yet real.
Your hands, which had once been so sure, were trembling as you gently stroked his back, offering what little comfort you could. It was instinctual, but you didn’t know how to handle this—how to respond to this side of him, this raw and exposed Astarion who no longer seemed the distant, untouchable creature he often portrayed.
"You don’t have to be strong all the time," You whispered softly, your voice trembling as well, though you didn’t fully understand why. Perhaps it was the deep ache in his cries, or the way he had let you see the person he truly was beneath all the shields he had built over the years.
Astarion’s breath hitched again, and his grip tightened as he let out one final, shuddering sob, his voice breaking as he spoke.
"I... I’ve never... never let anyone in. I didn’t know... if I could. I didn’t know... if I was allowed to."
Your chest tightened at his words, and you pulled him in closer, if that was even possible. You didn’t say anything more. There were no words that could heal what he had been through. But this—holding him like this—was all you could give him now.
As the minutes passed, his sobs eventually softened, though the tears didn’t stop. When they finally pulled apart, his eyes were red-rimmed, his cheeks streaked with tears. He was still the same Astarion, yet he was so different. You saw him now—not as the charming, confident rogue, but as a man who had been broken by the world and was learning, for the first time, that he didn’t have to carry that burden alone.
You touched his face gently, brushing away the tear stains with your fingers, a quiet tenderness in your touch that spoke more than words ever could. And in that moment, you realized how much you had underestimated him—how much of his strength came from enduring, not from hiding.
"You don’t have to do this alone anymore, Astarion," you said quietly, your voice steady, despite the emotions swirling within you. "I’m here."
And for once, Astarion didn’t push you away. Instead, he allowed himself to be vulnerable with you, allowing you to see the man who had always hidden in the shadows. And perhaps, for the first time in centuries, Astarion felt as though he could truly breathe again.
The silence that followed Astarion’s emotional outburst felt heavy, yet there was a strange sense of closeness between you now, an unspoken understanding that had never existed before. Astarion stood there, his shoulders still trembling, his eyes flickering with uncertainty as if unsure how to proceed. His usual deflection of vulnerability, the mask he wore so effortlessly, was shattered.
Finally, his voice broke the quiet, almost hesitant, a stark contrast to the confident tone he usually held.
"Y/N..." He paused, his voice softer than you'd ever heard it before.
"Would you... would you stay with me tonight? In my tent, I mean." His eyes met yours, full of a quiet, almost desperate need. "I... I don’t want to be alone right now."
You felt your heart skip a beat at the request. It was more than just an invitation—it was a plea, a crack in the fortress he’d so carefully built. For a moment, you simply stood there, unsure of what to say. You had never seen Astarion this raw, this unguarded. He was asking for comfort in a way you never thought he would, and in that moment, you realized how much he needed it.
You nodded and said, "Of course. I’ll stay."
The warmth in his eyes, though fleeting, was enough to reassure you that your presence was more of a comfort than you'd anticipated. You made your way to his tent, a quiet tension lingering between you, but one that was no longer entirely uncomfortable.
-------------------------------------------------
Once inside the tent, Astarion moved toward his bedroll, his movements slow and tentative, as though every step was weighed with uncertainty. You followed, your heart aching for him as you watched him struggle with his own feelings. You set your belongings aside, then sat down beside him, your voice gentle yet firm as you spoke.
"You don’t have to pretend anymore, Astarion," you said softly. "I’m here. You don’t have to carry everything on your own."
Astarion didn’t respond immediately, his gaze drifting to the floor. But after a long, drawn-out breath, he finally let himself sit, and his body seemed to deflate, as though every ounce of strength had left him in the wake of his confession. He moved onto his side, curling into himself like a frightened child, facing you.
You watched him for a moment, your heart swelling with empathy and tenderness. You lay beside him, reaching out to gently pull him closer, wrapping your arms around him in a silent offer of protection.
At first, Astarion stiffened, his body rigid, as though he was unsure of how to accept such intimacy. But then, after a long, trembling pause, he let out a quiet sigh and let himself relax into your embrace. He curled further into you, his head resting against your chest, his body trembling slightly as he sought comfort.
You held him without hesitation, letting your warmth and the steady rhythm of your heartbeat soothe him. Your fingers traced gentle circles along his back, as if trying to erase the centuries of pain he had carried with him. He was so different now, so fragile in your arms, that it almost felt like a dream.
Astarion’s breath was shallow at first, but as the minutes stretched on, it deepened. His body, which had been tense and guarded for so long, gradually relaxed. You could feel him letting go, his muscles loosening, his breath evening out, and the rhythm of his movements slowly matching your own.
But what surprised you most was how tightly he clung to you. His arms were wrapped around your arm, his fingers digging into your skin as if afraid you might disappear. His face pressed deeper into you, his body instinctively seeking more of the comfort you offered.
For a long time, you lay there, his face pressed to your chest, your arms wrapped around him like a shield. Astarion didn’t speak, but the soft sound of his breathing told you everything you needed to know—he was allowing himself to be held, to be loved, in a way he hadn’t let anyone do for centuries.
---------------------------
As the night wore on, you could feel his body gradually relax further, and eventually, his grip loosened slightly. Still, he remained curled into you, a quiet, vulnerable presence in your arms. He had let you in, and for the first time, you understood the full extent of the man beneath the smirk, beneath the walls he had so carefully constructed.
You held him through the night, offering him the one thing he had craved for so long: a safe place to rest, a moment where he didn’t have to be anything other than what he was—a man who had suffered and, for once, didn’t have to face it alone.
And as he finally drifted off to sleep, his body curled into yours like a fragile, broken thing, you stayed close, your heart quietly aching for him. You didn’t know what the future held for them, but in that moment, you knew one thing for sure—you wouldn’t leave him, not now, not ever.
--------------------------------------------
The first thing Astarion felt when he woke up was warmth—soft, steady, and comforting. It took him a moment to realize where he was, and even longer to comprehend the weight of the situation. His arms were wrapped tightly around you, his face pressed gently against your, his body still half-curled into yours. The sensation of your breath on his skin, the subtle rise and fall of your chest, reminded him of the deep connection you had shared through the night.
His heart stilled for a moment, uncertainty creeping into his thoughts. He had never allowed anyone to get this close, never let down his guard so completely. But now, as he lay there with you, his body unconsciously molded into yours, a strange sense of peace settled over him.
Then, he noticed something that made his breath catch.
As his gaze shifted, he saw your arm, resting across the bedroll, and his eyes widened. There were dark purple bruises scattered across your skin—faint but noticeable. His heart dropped in his chest as he realized the bruises had formed where he had gripped you so tightly in his sleep. His hand had held yours as though you were the only thing anchoring him to reality, and now, seeing the evidence of his desperation, guilt gnawed at him.
Astarion slowly shifted, carefully unwrapping himself from your arms, though the instinct to hold you close was strong. He winced at the sight of the bruises. His heart tightened as he gently touched the marks on your arm, his fingertips grazing over the tender skin with a soft, apologetic motion.
"Y/N..." His voice was low, soft, almost unrecognizable to his own ears. "I’m so sorry."
He watched you closely, but you didn’t stir, your breathing steady and calm. It seemed you hadn’t woken up yet. His gaze moved to your face, and for a moment, he forgot to breathe. You were meditating, your posture serene, and your face as peaceful as the stillness around them. There was a quiet strength in your expression, something he hadn’t expected to see after such an emotionally charged night.
Astarion’s chest ached. It wasn’t just the guilt over your bruises—it was the realization of how much you had given him, how much you had allowed him to lean on you when he was at his lowest. The fact that you hadn’t pulled away, hadn’t recoiled from his touch even when he held you so tightly, was nothing short of a miracle. His usual cynicism and self-preservation had never prepared him for something like this.
He swallowed hard, his hand lingering on your arm for a moment longer before he slowly drew it away, not wanting to cause you any further discomfort. But the guilt remained, festering deep within him. He leaned back slightly, watching her as you continued your meditation.
When you finally opened your eyes, the world around them seemed to shift—there was a quiet understanding between you two, one that was built from your shared vulnerability. He expected you to react, perhaps to say something about the bruises, to admonish him for being so careless in his sleep. But instead, you simply smiled softly, as if knowing exactly what he was feeling.
"You held me like I was the last thing that mattered," you said, your voice quiet but filled with warmth. "I understand, Astarion. It’s okay."
Your words washed over him, and his breath caught in his throat. He had expected you to be angry, to pull away, but instead, you offered him reassurance, as if his actions hadn’t hurt you at all. The fact that you weren’t upset, wasn’t repelled by his need for your presence, only deepened the confusion and gratitude swirling within him.
"I didn’t mean to hurt you," he muttered, his voice rough. "I... I couldn’t control myself. I’ve never been like this before, not with anyone."
"I know," You replied, your voice filled with an understanding that went deeper than any words could express. "I know you didn’t mean it."
Astarion couldn’t help the tightness in his chest as he looked at you. The tenderness of your response, your quiet forgiveness, made something in him shift—a crack in the wall he had spent so long building around his heart. He had always been so used to being alone, to never relying on anyone. But You... You made him feel like maybe it was possible to trust someone again, to let someone in without fear of them abandoning him or taking advantage of his weakness.
Without thinking, he reached out, gently cupping your cheek in his hand. You didn’t flinch, didn’t pull away. Instead, you leaned into his touch, your eyes closing for a moment as if savoring the rare tenderness he offered.
"I’m sorry," he said again, this time with a quiet finality. "And thank you—for being here. For letting me hold you like that."
You opened your eyes, and there was something in them—something soft, but also resolute. You reached up, placing your hand over his, holding it there as if to say that you were here, that you would always be here.
"You never have to apologize for needing someone, Astarion," you whispered, you voice calm but powerful. "I’m not going anywhere. Not now. Not ever."
Astarion’s heart fluttered in his chest, and for the first time in as long as he could remember, he allowed himself to believe it.
You smiled softly as you sat up, brushing a stray lock of hair from your face. The morning sun filtering through the tent, casting a warm glow over the quiet scene. You turned to Astarion, your gaze filled with affection and without a word, you leaned toward him.
Astarion's breath caught in his throat, despite not needing to breathe as your lips neared. His body tensing in anticipation, every nerve in him drawn to you in that fleeting moment. The sensation of your closeness, the steady rhythm of your breath, had him spellbound.
As your lips brushed his skin, his mind barely registered the softness of your kiss, but the feeling was so tender, so full of promise, but then as quickly as it had begun, the kiss was over.
Astarion blinked, his eyes wide with surprise. He had felt the delicate brush of your lips against his cheek, yet he had expected a kiss on the lips. For a moment, he was stunned, disoriented by the rush of emotions he had felt and the sudden emptiness that followed.
The confusion was brief, but sharp- he hadn't realized how badly he had wanted your kiss to linger on his lips. How much he had craved it, deep down, despite his constant battle with the walls he had built around himself.
He sat up slightly, staring at you as you moved to rise from the bedroll. His hand twitched at his side, an impulse to reach for you, to pull you back.
"Y/N." He said softly, your name almost a whisper on his lips, but it held an undercurrent of something deeper, something unspoken.
"Why the cheek?" His voice was venerable in a way he rarely allowed himself to be, and for the briefest moment, it seemed as though his usual composure faltered. His gaze lingered on your lips, unable to hide the disappointment that had unexpectedly blossomed in his chest.
It wasn't just the kiss- it was the sting of wanting something more, of feeling something for someone he wasn't sure he was ready for. You paused, your expression softening as you turned to face him.
"Astarion...it wasn't the right time." You murmured, your voice gentle, but firm.
"You need to know that I'm here for you, and I don't want to rush anything." You explained softly, cupping his face with a tenderness he wasn't yet used to.
Astarion's emotions were a tangled mess of confusion and yearning. He wanted more. He needed more. The distance between you- the space left unfilled by your kiss- was unbearable.
He had let his guard down for you, trusted you with something raw and vulnerable, and now he felt the gap between you widening, even if just by a hair. He couldn't let you slip away from him, not now, not after all they had shared.
You got up to leave again, standing up.
Before he could think any longer, the impulse took over. He shot forward, grabbing your wrist with a desperate urgency, he stood with you, still holding your wrist. He pulled you towards him.
"Don't go." He breathed, his voice tight with need, with longing. Your eyes widened with surprise, but before you could say anything, Astarion's lips were on yours, hungry, desperate, and full of something he hadn't allowed himself to feel in a very long time.
He kissed you as if he were starved for it, the restraint he had kept up for so long finally breaking free in a rush of heat and emotion. His hand slid to the back your neck, fingers tangling in your hair as he deepened the kiss, urging you to meet him with equal fervor.
The kiss was frantic at first- his lips pressing hard against yours as if to prove something to himself, to prove that he wasn't as broken as he felt. His hands trembling with intensity of his desire.
When he finally pulled back, his breath came in uneven gasps, and his eyes were filled with a mixture of longing and something else-something vulnerable.
"Do you understand now?" Astarion whispered, his voice low and hoarse. His hands roamed over your arms, as if needing to ground himself in the sensation of your touch.
"I can't stand the thought of you leaving me like this. Not when I-" He stopped himself, suddenly aware of the words that nearly slipped out. His chest tightened, a mix of fear and something more tender swirling within him. He swallowed hard, trying to regain his composure.
Your gaze softened again as you cupped his face, your fingers gentle against his skin.
"Astarion, I'm not going anywhere." You reassured him,
"But you have to understand, this isn't about rushing. It's about trusting each other, letting it unfold as it should."
He closed his eyes, taking a shaky breath, and for the first time, he let his guard fall completely.
"I don't know how to do that." He admitted quietly, his voice barely above a whisper.
"But I want to learn. With you."
You leaned in again, this time pressing a soft kiss to his lips- a kiss filled with promise, filled with patience.
When you pulled back, you smiled softly, as though you knew exactly what he needed. And for the first time in what felt like forever, Astarion believed that maybe, just maybe, he could let himself have it.
85 notes ¡ View notes
chimimon ¡ 24 hours ago
Text
What Gave Me Away?
Astarion x f!Reader
Word Count 9.5k
Disclaimer! What you are about to read contains the following: GAMEPLAY SPOILERS! & ROMANCING ASTARION SPOILERS! Mentions of canonical violence, Astarion POV, angst, with comfort (it ends nice I promise), slow burn, depictions of anxiety, depression, anger, insecurity, guilt, manipulation, blood drinking (of course), and it’s long as fuuuuuuu
& what I have to say is… As it turned out, I had played all of Act 2 out of order, and stopped doing that before I did some irreversible damage to my Moonrise Tower to-do list. Which means when I began to write this fic EVERYTHING WAS OUT OF ORDER. It still might be but idgaf anymore. Even the mf confession scene (I WIN! I WIN AND I DIDN’T EVEN TRY TO CHARM THAT VAMPIRE MF) I was sitting in my room, phone on my chest, Baldurs Gate in my hands googling ‘what to do before moonrise’, ‘moonrise or mausoleum first in bg3’, because I explored much more than I should have, apparently… So this fic has been Frankenstein-ed to death, and the word count has greatly exceeded my expectations. It’s kind of my baby so be nice and give it a little love if you like it… or don’t! I appreciate you either way. And Special thanks to E.P. for the prompt and her friend in SoCal because I was about to screw myself OVEEERRR!
Everything seemed bleak on the way to the Light Inn. Nothing magical or charming about the glowing mushrooms anymore and the air felt as thick as water. Astarion faithfully trudged behind you through the mud, uneven trails, and hostile shadowy figures. But sometimes you would squint at the marker on the map or linger a little longer than you should have. He would watch you squeeze your right hand with your left as you studied the hastily blotted spot, then you would trace the drawn pathway with your left hand while the right one would cover and squeeze your mouth. Beyond scenery, and new objectives, everyone was adapting. They had to; he had to. But you were changing faster than others, faster than him, and much faster than he could keep track of. 
Astarion felt like he was watching you disappear, or feeling you slip out of his hands the way blood from deep wounds squeezed between desperately closed fingers. From kind traveler, comforter, and hopefully hopeless leader, you burned with a desire to be it all. In front of other wandering bodies, the mere strangers swimming through the Underdark, Astarion watched you hold this fire with outstretched, kerosene-soaked hands, just to give someone else light. You might never see these people again, but you did it anyways, even if all it did was burn. Whether it be fighting at some poor soul's side or offering words of comfort, once the rescuee turned to leave Astarion watched to see whatever leftover flame danced in your palms. Some nights he couldn’t even call it that despite you cradling it close to your chest. 
Often times Astarion thought of taking over your dealings even if it meant they’d get a little lost in his blind, apathetic advice. He knew that you were the most levelheaded person to lead but gods you started to look as lost as he already felt. The Inn was just a bridge away, before it was it was a group of protective Harpers away. Before anyone could find a place to lay their heads Astarion felt his patience thin when having to save Isobel was thrown into the mix. But you fought fearlessly. Always saving people without a second to spare, or a second to think. 
Lately, Astarion wondered just where you had been all these years. 
“If possible,” you spoke in soft whispers to Jaheira about your accommodations. “Could I have a single room for tonight? I-I can pay I just-” 
With a quick hand over yours and a warm smile, Jaheira reassured you that after keeping their Selûne Warrior safe, the least she could do was let you have a room to yourself. “It has two beds, but you can push them together for one big one.” You nodded and thanked her with a long breath out. 
Astarion for a moment pretended to be looking at a patron nearby as you walked toward him. But he couldn’t help trying to keep you in scene before you could arrive. Trying to read your shoulders, eyes brows and hands. Truthfully Astarion was looking for something soft in your inventory; he wondered if tonight you might have anything to spare. 
“If you’re hungry,” your worn out, dim voice and all-knowing watch cut in. “You can feed on me tonight if you’d like.” 
“I was just so hoping you’d ask. But are you really looking for alone time?” Giving you a tilted head and lopsided glance was enough to tell him where he stood. “Or are you looking for alone time with me, darling?” 
“I was going to pretend you weren’t obviously eavesdropping, but you’d love that wouldn’t you?” You were warm enough to keep up with a quirked a brow and an equally lazy grin. “After today I feel like everyone can smell me from outside the Inn. So, until I can shower... I don’t even want to think about doing anything other than sleeping in a bed.” 
“I’m sure you don’t.” He whisked behind you and whispered, “But if change your mind, at least think of me.” 
“Aha, I’ll be seeing you later,” the back of your hand smacked your forehead as though you were swooning. “Tonight.” 
A small guilt tugged at his chest before you nodded off and up the stairs. Astarion would lounge around in the waiting area while Karlach gushed over Jaheira from afar. Shadowheart walked alongside her to study the Inn with wholehearted skepticism. Audibly muttering her thoughts about the moon maiden, the area as a whole, and how Shar’s worshippers must have had their reasons. She broke away from Karlach and headed to Astarion with her eyes stuck to Jaheira. “We should probably get to our room them?” 
“Right.” 
On cue, Karlach caught them both headed up the stairs and followed. She waved to Jaheira, still gushing. “Gods isn’t this exciting- oh, hey? Where’d our little leader go?” Karlach asked upon arrival. 
“She might’ve beat us to bed.” Shadowheart smiled. “I wouldn’t blame her if she’s fast asleep, she’s earned it.” 
Astarion thought about letting them know about your requested ‘alone time’ but figured you would come around to telling them after they find you. 
Little drops of drying water decorated the wooden floor in a trail that led down the stairs. Astarion followed the trail with his eyes alongside Karlach who noticed it too. “Wait, Shadowheart,” she called. 
None of them had noticed you pass by with freshly washed hair and a towel around your shoulders.  They all backtracked down the staircase, Karlach stood near a game of chess, Shadowheart by the banister, and Astarion some feet behind you while you knelt in front of a hairless cat. You seemed more at ease tonight. 
“Hello, your highness.” You let your hand keep you steady on the ground as you spoke. “I’ve come to admire your beauty.” The cat sat tall and proud, lifting his head so you can awe at his hairless self. “And what a beautiful cat indeed.” You cooed without reaching to touch the animal. 
The cat nodded and swiftly made its way over to its bed, dismissing you with its whole, hairless body. You stood up, stretched your arms above your head before catching the group lounging nearby. Nothing was said as you politely waved to everyone before turning your attention to a man and child playing chess. 
From behind you couldn’t tell just then who you were looking at but as you rounded the table to get a good view of the game, Raphael and Mol, the Tiefling child who spoke on everyone's behalf earlier, seemed to be in a heated match. Raphael was going to win despite giving Mol pointers. If anything, his pointers were just to remind Mol that she was going to lose no matter the move. 
The child's pouting seemed to give you an idea. You took a drawn-out stretch being sure to overextend your arms and back. Astarion knew exactly what you were doing before you ‘lost your balance’ and knocked into the board. The pieces tipped and rolled in every direction and Raphael shot a knowing look at you, only turning back to the board after his opponent had pieced it back together. 
“Well, go on, Mol.” The devil muttered. 
With one move Mol won the game and shot up from their seat. “Well, that settles it. Fair and square!” They exclaimed proudly. 
“Sure, fair and square.” Raphael nodded up to you. “But before you go,” Mol looked over her shoulder. “Think about my offer.” 
Up and away she went while Raphael turned to his leftover audience. “Fancy seeing you all here, and so far away from the sun.” 
“I didn’t know you struck up deals with children.” Your tone surprised Astarion. 
“Don’t you worry, it’s only a necessary evil. She’ll come around to the only option she has,” Raphael expectantly looked past you to Astarion. “But I have a feeling your little friend has a question they want to ask me.” 
“I do,” Astarion’s eye contact wavered. “I have a proposal.” Raphael mocked him before mentioning something about his how drinking blood would burn more than whiskey. “This is serious business, devil.” Astarion hardened his voice as he explained the runes. From the corner of his eye, he watched you stiffly fold your arms and size Raphael up with a glare. Astarion felt some comfort in that. “I want to know if it’s maybe a contract...” 
“Well, what could it be?” Raphael melodically taunted. “A lover letter, a deed, a contract?” He waved his hand in front of Astarion’s face like he was introducing the opening act in a play. “But I need time to think. I will have to get back to you on that.” 
Astarion whined, reiterating just how serious this was to him before asking, “Just how soon will you get back to me on that?” 
“Soon.” 
At some point you fidgeted with the fabric of the towel around your neck before steadily pulling it to one side of your shoulder. “Don’t worry,” the devil reassured both of you, “I am most inclined to help.” With dramatic flair, Raphael disappeared in a quick plume of smoke. 
All eyes but yours turned to Astarion, and Astarion with his on you. It was clear that Raphael’s attitude had rubbed you the wrong way as you blankly stared at the spot he vanished from. “I’ll get back to you on that.” you mumbled. Your damp hair had soaked into the neck of your top. The towel dangled in your balled fist at your hip. The cool breeze sent shivers up your neck before you put the cloth back onto shoulders. After another moment of thinking, you turned around to head to your room. 
“Darling?” Despite it being barely audible, his voice seemed to reach you anyway as he caught your subtle hesitation before decidedly going on your way. 
Karlach and Shadowheart both began to say something but in vain as you were so lost in thought still that you couldn’t hear. They turned their attention to Astarion who intently watched you. “Is something going on between you two?” 
“What?” Astarion snapped his head to Karlach. 
“Sorry.” She snorted. “It could’ve been Raphael but she just seems way more tired than usual.” 
“Well, we are in the Underdark, Karlach.” He said obviously. “It’s dark down here, and I’m sure that the dark makes most normal people tired.” 
“Don’t be rude Astarion.” Shadowheart butt in. “Are you sure that feeding on her every night wouldn’t be a contributing factor along with ‘the dark’?” 
“Haven’t you been healing her up every morning?” 
“I have not. Not since we’ve been down here.” Karlach watched in awe between the stairs and then to two bantering at the bottom. “So, if you’ve been feeding on her still, well... She hasn’t had any of her usual morning chats with me.” Shadowheart finished. 
Karlach watched as Astarion’s eyes round in realization. The guilt grew, pushing his stomach up into his neck. “Oh Fangs, you didn’t know. It’s okay, I think.” 
“Is it, Karlach?” Shadowheart interjected, shooting a venomous glare at the ill looking vampire. “It started with a dagger to her neck, which she forgave. Then she’s understanding of your hunger, even defending you to Gale after you go at her neck again without permission.” 
“That was once- only twice-!” He pushed his finger out to correct her. 
“And all you can do is give half-hearted compliments and bat your eyelashes whenever you need something. A potion, a moment, a warm body to bleed. I mean, have you even said thank you?” 
Karlach put her hand between the two. “Shadowheart, I know you’re worried about her but you know that it’s can’t just one person's fault. It might not be anyone’s fault let alone Astarions.” She waved it up and down. “I think we’re all just tired-.” 
“Don’t act like you’re physically incapable of talking to her yourself!” Astarion retorted above and below Karlach’s hand. “And my attempts to thank her have been pushed aside, thank you very much!” 
“Ever try a full-fledged, verbal ‘thank you for feeding me every night, I appreciate you letting me suck you dry, Darling.’ ever?” She took a deep breath in, and on exhale she let her shoulder drop. 
“Let’s just go up and check on her then.” Karlach successfully cut in. 
Shadowheart reached into a small pouch on her person and thoughtfully brought out the little idol of Shar you gifted her the moment you could dust it off. “Do you know just how much she puts into our group?” Her voice was coated in adoration, and it made Astarion sick. “Or how much she’s already put in?” 
Astarion knew. Of course he knew. He was well aware of how much he took, as well as often as did. But he always knew just when to stop, or at least he thought he knew. But that was before he started to find you in even the smallest corners of his mind, before he found himself keeping an eye on you in battle, before the guilt got harder to swallow. If he pushed your sincerity aside with closed eyes as he held out a beggar's hand, the weight of what you gave him would mean nothing if he didn’t have see what you were left with. 
The strangers, travelers, your kind demeanor and hopeful act. Looking back to the Harper woman that marked your map, he wondered if the Light Inn was going to be enough to keep you going tomorrow. If it was enough for you to spare anything more after, or in the days to come. Gods, was the Harper woman a reflection of him? Where he only loathed her for sinning the same way he did; or for taking what he was saving for later? If anything, Astarion felt like he might as well just be another traveler to you. Someone that followed you around like hungry, dead weight. But he would never have to wonder how far you had carried him and six others, they had the map and markers. But he did wonder just how often he stole your living, breathing warmth. 
Wasn’t that the plan, for him to bleed you dry? Then, now, and hopefully after? 
“I don’t think Astarion would do anything to purposefully weaken her.” Karlach came to his defense. “That wouldn’t make sense, especially now. Besides, she is a big girl and can come to you if she feels like it.” 
Shadowheart shook her head. “You know what? You’re right. And so are you, Astarion.” The little, rock carved goddess dramatically fell to her side alongside her hand as she turned. “Why am I even waiting for her to ask? I’ll be upstairs.” She ran and left Karlach to tend to Astarion. 
“Fangs, you’re looking down, too. Don’t let Shadowheart get to you she’s been…” Karlach gave a sympathetic smile. “You know you can always talk to Mama-K.” Her laugh was aimed at herself as Astarion playfully rolled his eyes. 
The two of them watched the floor before Astarion looked up to her. “Do you think I’ve done it this time?” 
Without a second thought Karlach shook her head enthusiastically. “You might be right about the Underdark. There’s more on her mind than just you and me. Well, in her mind… I should say.” 
“In our minds.” a pathetic laugh bubbled from the nausea. “I think our dark princess would have to agree with that. At least to some extent.” 
Karlach met Astarion’s gaze with another sympathetic smile “I know you care,” she seemingly said out of nowhere. “I’m not the only one who sees it when you look at her. Even if it’s just a little. I think she at least knows that you care about her if Shadowheart doesn’t, ya’ know?” 
Astarion slowly nodded with a confused look before Karlach lead the way to their room. When Shadowheart returned from her check-in with you, she paid no mind to Astarion for the rest of the night. Instead, she went straight to Karlach, and to what his eavesdropping could gather, he safely assumed that he was in the clear. He guessed you really did just need alone time. 
After his vampiric rest, he lied still. Whatever light from outside cast patterns on the ceiling, and he cut them out into little pieces with Shadowheart’s steady breathing and some occasional snoring from Karlach in the background. Then he wondered what you sounded like while you slept. He hated that he didn’t pay attention the one time he could. Did you snore? If you did, were they raspy, hollow breathes or loud snorts that echoed? Maybe you were the restless dreamer where the shuffle of blankets and pillows would tell him you were just about to wake up. 
Astarion found himself wanting to know and shot up before he could want to know more. 
The wood was cool on the bottom of his feet. Without creaking, cracks, or splinters Astarion was able to move quietly out of the room into the hall. Lit candles lined the hallway to your room which felt more meaningful to him than it should have but he shook coincidence away and out of his mind. Instead, Astarion thought about how you pretended not to hear him earlier, he thought back to hands holding flames and he froze, feeling sick at your door. 
I’m hungry, he told himself. I feel sick because I am hungry. 
You sat on the edge of the bed, clearly expecting him with your hair pulled to one side and the right side of your neck exposed. “You’re late.” 
“Only a little, darling.” Astarion made his way over to plant his right knee beside your thigh, his left leg between your own. “I hope I haven’t kept you waiting.” 
“Hardly.” you whispered to the door behind him. “Besides, I can’t let you go hungry, can I?” 
Astarion decided not to press you. “I suppose not.” He smirked as the breath of his reply sent goosebumps all over your neck and shoulders. 
Tonight, you didn’t close your eyes in anticipation. There was no shiver down your spine or shudder in your breath when Astarion held both of your shoulders while he slowly sunk his teeth in. Hells, you didn’t even whine. It felt like kissing someone who wouldn’t close their eyes or kiss him back. 
Astarion made it quick, hardly getting his fill. As he arose and took a step back to search you up and down for any sign of discomfort. There was nothing out of the ordinary, you paled like usual, especially in your lips, but your expression was unreadable. Visibly there was nothing wrong, but he wanted to listen to your beating heart just to be sure nothing was moving faster or slower than it should. Then without thinking, he suddenly and loosely embraced you in his arms to put his head to your chest. 
“Woah, h-hey.” You jumped back on your elbows, crawling a step back on the bed. 
Astarion’s hands shot up in the air. “I was just,” The look of innocent surprise that coated your body was cute until he remembered why you looked so venerable. He furrowed his brows as he massaged the bridge of his nose, coming off of the bed. “I-I didn’t, or- I don’t mean to insinuate anything, my dear.”  
“Then...” The bed shook under his knee as you relaxed onto your hands, upright but leery. “What were you trying to do?” 
“Nothing, really." He massaged his neck. “Unless-” 
“Unless nothing.” You wildly grinned. “Unless nothing, Astarion. I really mean to have my alone time.” 
“Are you-” Astarion squared his gaze onto the litters of goosebumps on your chest and shoulders while you self-soothingly rubbed your arms. “Are you cold?” His chest tightened once he realized you were suppressing the chatter of your teeth with a trembling jaw. 
“A little.” The movement slowed as you stiffly squeezed your biceps. “Blood loss tends to do that.” 
That’s right, he thought. Astarion of all people, or undead things, should know that the lack of blood meant a lack of warmth. 
“Don’t you look so concerned. That’s not like you.” You coyly laughed. “I’ve been okay before, and I’ll be okay now. I am sitting on top of a completely made bed, you know?” 
Astarion stretched his neck and sighed. “Of course.” He gave you a weak chuckle. “Well, I guess I’ll take my leave then. But if you need a little warming up, you know where to find me.” The rustle of sheets as you climbed under the covers made him scrunch his nose insecurely at the door. “Good night, darling.” 
The following morning, Astarion could found sitting at the chess table, replaying the night before. Not for Raphael but for you. It more so that he was cringing at himself and his lack of control. The way your reacted to his embrace compared to his bite made his head spin with wonder and disappointment. The fact that his teeth breaking your flesh was better received than his concern was astounding. Realizing that if he was going to pull you into him, it was expected that he take and not give. 
Was it that obvious? 
You descended the stairs, the two followed behind, and you were practically glowing. Immediately Astarion felt relieved to know that Shadowheart likely made sure to cast a restoration of some sort today. He sat up a little as you wordlessly greeted him, watching you feel the right side of your neck with your left hand while your self-conscious chuckle furthered his optimism. 
Sigh, last night, “Again, I didn’t-” Astarion started to apologize. 
“Hush.” You made big eyes in reference to the two behind you. “You’re alright in my book.” Sheepishly grinning, you tilted your head and scrunched your nose before heading out. 
As per usual, everyone followed your lead in battle. Successfully you collected the Moonlantern, freed a pixie from inside, and were already thinking about the next move back at camp the morning after. “I think we should scope out Moonrise before meeting with any head honchos.” You said near the empty fire pit at camp. “I’ll do my usual hoarding while we get a good look at the place. And this,” you pointed to a little circle with question mark inside, “I can hardly remember what for, but I think it was marked for some rumored supplies.” You wiggled your fingers in the air with feigned enthusiasm. “I would like this to be priority, actually.” 
“Yes ma’am.” Karlach affirmed. “And I see that good ol’ Gale will be joining us today?” 
“I shall be at your disposal, yes.” He smiled genuinely before it grew sheepish. “Of course, with the hopes that I would not be disposed of.” 
Astarion rolled his eyes.  
“Never, Gale.” You playfully smiled at Astarion. “You’re the last person here I’d do that to” 
“Oh, don’t look at me,” he scoffed but you did, playfully through your lashes. 
“Whatever you say.” You sung before quickly tucking the map away. “But today we’re just scoping, taking, and talking.” 
Everyone nodded, and without another word were off to Moonrise. 
To everyone’s surprise, the guards could not care less about your party going in. The parasite was like a VIP pass inside and the tadpole-less guests praised your every step. It was odd to be so easily trusted and to roam freely. Usually at least one person challenged your worm infected autonomy, but this was a nice yet eerie change. 
But to nobody’s surprise nothing could ever go according to plan. Gale had opened the biggest and most obvious set of doors upon entry and interrupted a meeting between some goblins and Katheric Thorm. To the very left of where Katheric was sat stood Z’rell, the cult advisor that the guards outside said everyone must report to. And again, to not no one’s surprise, the meeting was nothing short of incredibly memorable with a show of immortal strength and the opportunity to sacrifice a small goblin herd at trial. 
Astarion was curious to see what your heroic self would do when the fate of the goblin crews' lives was hurriedly placed in your hands. So, when you had asked them to stop speaking, ‘to not even breathe’, his heart raced with confusion and excitement. 
That’s my girl, he thought. “But by the gods, I hope she’s okay.” 
“Me too.” Karlach swallowed with disappointment. 
Astarion cupped his mouth, not meaning to have said the second half of his thought aloud. 
Karlach looked over to him, “I guess the Underdark really is doing a number on her.” 
“It would seem so.” He kissed his teeth. 
You waved everyone over to follow Z’rell upstairs. A whole new mission got added to the list and Astarion took in this small laugh of disbelief you gave him. In response he tucked in his chin and raised a brow as though to wordlessly ask what exactly had you expected after everything leading up to this. 
The Tower was big, full of locked doors and overly trusting guests that roamed and for a moment there was some pep in your step as soon as you finally got everyone back on track. But once a broken wall produced just under 200 gold and a spell scroll, your disappointment was obvious as you bit your knuckle at the open chest. Without enthusiasm, you drew a little check mark beside the rumored supplies you prioritized this morning. Astarion would normally have something snarky to say but the glowing girl from earlier was having her light put out by her own optimism and he wanted nothing more than to do or say something that could bring back a spark. A pixie, perhaps. But before he could reach out to you, Karlach pushed through a door and on the other side of it was Araj who would come to make things worse.  
The blood lusted alchemist was off to a bad start when she immediately noted Astarion as the ‘Pale Friend’, drawing a more than uninterested look from you as she spoke. “I can make one of a kind potion, just for you, from you.” She modestly smiled. “One prick, a drop of your blood and it’s yours. But I keep the rest for myself.” 
After some curious questions, Astarion was surprised when you held out your hand to be poked. But then thought about how stupid it was to be surprised at that after the night prior. Instantly a potion was produced and carefully placed into your hands. 
“Thank you-” 
“Before you go, there is one other thing I would like to discuss;” she interrupted moved closer to you, but only to get a better look at Astarion. “Your friend.” 
Astarion knew that he stood out in a room to anyone who knew anything about the undead. They could and often did sniff him out wherever he met them. So, when she inquired of his being a Vampire or spawn, he naturally reassured her that as a part of the absolute that everyone serving in Her name was safe in his company.  
“Oh no, I hope for quite the opposite.” Araj watched you expectantly. “I assume he belongs to you?” 
“Belongs?” A distasteful curiosity bled from your voice. “Excuse me, but he’s his own person.” 
She smiled mockingly. “I’m sure he believes that.” 
Distaste was a little soft, you looked and sounded appalled. Actually, to everyone in your corner, your face gave that word another meaning. The drow hardly asked for his name, if anything she flatly commanded it from the wide-eyed Vampire. 
Your finger flew back to shush him, “Astarion” he too quickly answered. “But wait-.” 
“Good.” She smirked. “Now-” 
Your finger made its way around to her before she could continue. “Watch it.” You warned. 
Astarion looked over to Karlach and Gale who were also caught just as off guard as you were. But she paid no mind to your hand as she explained her life-long, born from childhood dream of being bitten by a vampire. She looked too comfortable swooning as she talked about losing her blood in between life and death. “I’ll even give compensation. A potion of legendary power.” Araj bribed. 
Astarion knew where this was going as Araj gave the details of the potion. He knew where he was and knew everyone had just a taste of power these cultists had. He knew that most people would be persuaded with this once in a lifetime offer. Who wouldn’t want guaranteed strength in a bottle? Most people would be, but he hoped that you weren’t most people because was unsure he would say no if you asked him to. He knew he owed you that much. 
The Drow asked Astarion if he would bite her to which he kindly declined. Then she faced you, clearly taken aback. “Well, can’t you do something about him? About your spawn?” Astarion held his breath. 
“He said no.” Relief flooded his body, causing his shoulders to drop despite his fixed posture in surprise. But you were stiff, straightening your neck as disappointment spread across Araj’s face. “What part of that did you not get the first time?” 
“Soldier,” Karlach leaned to your ear. “I think we should get going.”  She nudged your foot with hers. “We’ll be seeing you, Arash.” 
“It’s Araj.” 
“Right, sorry.” Gale apologized on Karlach’s behalf and bowed on the way out. Astarion followed behind him through a door that took everyone back outside. 
Karlach seemed to be calming you down, and until Karlach mentioned it, Astarion didn’t realize that while Araj spoke you began to pet a dagger on your hilt. “We don’t need to get into trouble while we’re still on the Absolute’s ground. Not before we’re ready to be.” 
Surely it wasn’t on his behalf, was it? No could care about anyone that much let alone another Vampire’s Spawn. 
“I should’ve just done it. The doors were closed and who knows? Maybe she had the potion already on her. Or maybe not.” Astarion raised a brow as his stomach sank. “Fucking weirdo.” You muttered. 
“Wow,” Karlach laughed. “Fucking weirdo, I couldn’t agree with you more, Captain.” She ran up as you walked around the tower. 
Astarion blankly watched the back of your head from two people away as you grew quiet and stayed that way. He wanted to know what you were thinking and whether or not you were mad at him for being so unwilling or if your silence was left over from Araj. But there was also nothing planned after scoping out Moonrise, at least nothing anyone mentioned. Everyone settled on blindly following your lead as you spotted a hill with some makeshift graves. 
“Gale,” you stopped suddenly at the foot of an overgrown root. “Can you head back to camp and grab Shadowheart?” 
“Are you sure?” 
You nodded. “I’d really appreciate something warm and hearty when we get back, and I love her but-.” 
“No need, I get it.” Gale smiled, bowed, and waved everyone off. 
Astarion watched Gale leave before he caught you and Karlach now raced to a patch of dirt. When he caught up with you, Karlach was watching out for Shadowheart as you picked through some choice graves. 
“Sweetheart, are you robbing from dead Justiciars?” His shadow hovered over your hands. “Why have her join at all?” 
“I’m sure she might know something about this site. But not a word about my scavenging, please.” With steady hands your swiftly placed the stones back the way they were. 
Astarion’s index finger and thumb drew a line in front of his lips as he sealed them shut and threw away an imaginary key. “My lips are sealed.” 
You snorted and smacked the dirt off your hands before Shadowheart materialized out of thin air, having everything to say about Shar’s faithful fallen soldiers. As she knelt to one of the graves, reverently running her hand across the rocks, Astarion caught sight of a dimly lit entrance. Karlach saw it too and pointed. 
“Maybe we can check it out before we look for supplies in the buildings, we passed by…” her booming voice trailed off when she saw him, then everyone turned. 
Raphael was mumbling to himself at the bottom of some steps at entrance of a cave. As Astarion began to walk only to see you were once again leading the way over. Again, in disguise, the devil gave the details of his deal to the whole group. All they had to do was kill an old enemy of his if Astarion wanted his scars decoded. The deal seemed sweeter than what he expected, simpler, maybe too sweet. But no one was sure what price was to be paid for translation. 
Karlach leaned over to you. “Again, I really don’t know about this.” 
Astarion rolled his eyes before he turned away from the cave. He just missed your response, and how Karlach retorted didn't fill in any blanks. “I don’t want to be tricked into doing that evil fucker's errands for free or find out that this order is for more than any of us can afford fill.” 
“Well, for now,” Shadowheart shot Astarion a raised brow to measure. “I think should head back to camp. I think we could use a moment to relax.” She tilted her head to you with her eyes locked on Astarion. 
You nodded mindlessly. “Yeah, or at least a moment to think” 
Astarion began to open his mouth when Shadowheart chimed in again “Right,” sounding uncharacteristically chipper. “We should plan a little just before heading inside. 
“I’m sorry you came here for nothing-” 
“The graves of Justiciars are not nothing.  Besides, I’m glad you thought to have me, even if it was just for a moment.”  
Shadowheart was good at that. Being soft when you needed it. And Karlach was good at melting you into a giggling mess when she could. Most of the time Astarion could find something obscene enough to say, that pulled you out of your head to laugh. But lately he felt like him just being there was making it impossible for anyone to distract you from yourself. 
You looked pensive the whole walk back to camp. After everything that had happened today from Moonrise, to goblins, to devils, Astarion could not pinpoint if it was one specific thing or everything that weighed heavy on your mind. What he could gather was how drastic the dip in your mood was after Araj, and Raphael. Both of those things happened to be tied to him and he got that funny feeling again. The feeling that he was taking from you without realizing it. That his mere presence was enough to make you bleed. 
Astarion wished he had just said yes to drinking the Araj’s foul-smelling blood. He shouldn’t let you fight his battles and make his deals; he didn’t want you to anymore. Astarion was centuries older than you and yet you were the one holding his hand through the Underdark. Staying up late night after night so he could eat. And he found himself pondering it all too tenderly. 
Scratch and the Owlbear cub zipped past you, hopping around giddily despite the gloomy scenery. Astarion felt a bit pensive himself. You were just as distant as you had been lately but tonight you were especially cold. Sure, you were healthier today than you had been for a while, and nothing seemed to tire you out. But there wasn’t the light and witty banter you spewed so effortlessly that he loved. He missed your observant and borderline judgmental comments on anything you stole from buildings and corpses. Even in Balthazar’s room inside Moonrise Tower, which brimmed with separated limbs and cold jars of blood, you made no snarky comment in correlation to Astarion’s diet. It would’ve have been easy, low hanging fruit by his standards; but at this point he was pulling on the branches for you to reach, you wouldn’t even need to jump. Astarion just wanted you to pick up something, anything really to throw at him. 
“Hey,” You called out, making him unusually hopeful. 
“Yes, darling?” He gave his most honest grin. 
“Do you think we can trust him to keep up his end of the bargain? Raphael, I mean?”  
“I trust a devil over a vampire any day. Besides,” with his hand on his chest, Astarion leaned back. “I think he likes us.” 
How you slowly blinked and nodded flattened his hopes. “It’s your only lead, I suppose...” Scratch and the Owlbear nearly ran into you again, but you didn’t smile, flinch, or notice the animals despite watching them pass you two by. You were millions of miles away from everyone. Millions of miles away from him. 
“Yeah, it is our only lead. My only lead.” Astarion reiterated defensively. 
“I know, I know.” Your eyes screwed shut as you nodded some more. “Maybe we can go to the house of healing in case there’s something on Ketheric. Then after we can go to the cave.” 
“Only after…” What was cause for worry before was now cause for slight agitation. 
“Yes, well, I mean-” You threw your head back and up to the sky like itmight give you a clue. “Or..? Gods, I don’t know.” 
“What don’t you know, sweetheart?” 
“I-I don’t know that either. I don’t know what I don’t know, I guess.” Self soothingly you cupped your face and took a deep breath in. “What I do know is that’s it’s on my list.” You were staring at his neck, struggling to look up any further. 
You sounded unsure of yourself, and while that made him sympathetic, it did more to make him anxious. “I guess I can only hope that it’s high up there. Afterall, this is the first chance I’ve had at deciphering my scars.” Astarion apathetically reminded you, unable to help his tone when he leaned into your ear uncomfortably close. 
“Be a dear and don’t get in my way.” He spat. 
“I won’t?” You turned to him equally defensive. “Don’t you know by now that you can just-” Astarion faced you, practically touching noses but nothing about the tension was romantic once he caught what looked like tears pooling in your eyes. “Y-you should know by that you can just...” 
Karlach glanced over to what she likely saw as two people incredibly close to one another, “Oh, don’t look now but there’s PDA on the campgrounds,” she announced. Wyll let out a dramatic ‘Oo~’ that made her laugh. 
Astarion was horrified inside and unable to think despite having that same snippy look on his face. But once the tears fell, he quickly pulled away, finally softening his demeanor. Karlach eventually looked over at you two when she hadn’t heard any smart mouthed response. 
“You j-just have to ask.” You whimpered between labored breathes. 
Karlach ran to your side before Astarion could think to speak. “What happened?” The concern in her voice caught Gale and Shadowheart’s attention. Gale quietly watched Astarion from a few feet away while Shadowheart raced over to place her hands on your shoulders the moment she arrived. 
Shadowheart did what she did best lately, give dirty looks at Astarion from in the background. She had her head on your shoulder while Karlach tried to get some sort of response out of you. Shadowheart took her turn with her own line of questions when all Karlach could get was a pained look on your face. But there you were in the center of them making him sick again. 
Astarion couldn’t handle himself as you cried. Never in his life had he so quickly regretted saying something to someone, let alone someone he grew so fond of. He felt worse as found himself noting how pretty you looked with tears down you face. All you needed was a break, maybe another night to yourself and right now he would give you all of them if he could help it. But he couldn’t, he never could. Astarion had to be sure that you were still on his side, and that you’d be waiting for him in his corner as though standing up for him in Moonrise Towers wasn’t enough. 
Worry grew as Astarion thought about freedom of choice, and how much time had passed from the Tiefling party. You repeatedly declined his advances to have sex again, but he hadn’t made any significant or particularly tempting advances. In fact, he didn’t want to. Until now, he didn’t think he had to. In-between what he knew and what he wanted, Astarion wasn’t sure he would truly feel better if you just used his body like he needed you to. But if you wanted to, he would let you. It would be fair. It would make everything easier. It was what he thought he deserved. But there you were in front of him, reminding him that all he had to do was ask and it was his. He knew that if he said that aloud you would convince him otherwise, even if you had to do it sobbing. 
That’s exactly how you made everything harder. Without your hands, without a leash, and without control, you had successfully made him care. When exactly that had started, Astarion couldn’t be sure but it was unsettlingly that the feeling crept in without a sound after he was so sure about having his heart set on using you. Maybe it started as selfishly as all things start, where wanting part of someone becomes needing everything else, they were. When being protected meant taking care his protector and being feed meant cleaning up after. Astarion wanted to switch roles to take care of you for once, he just didn’t know how to yet. 
Shadowheart was about to call Gale over when you finally moved to wipe away your tears with the sleeves of your top were pulled over your palms. “Please don’t.” You pleaded with a nervous grin. “It’s nothing.” 
“It is clearly not nothing.” Shadowheart squeezed your arms, her chin bouncing on your shoulder as she spoke. “You know you can talk to me. Or Karlach.” The Tiefling had her hands on her knees, crouching and nodding while Shadowheart spoke. “Or I can go grab La’zael but I don’t actually know what she would do for you. I don’t think she’s ever cried in her life...” 
You let out an estranged laugh at the mention of Lae’zel. Shadowheart and Karlach’s whole demeanor eased up as they laughed with you. Coincidentally, Lae’zel started sharpening a blade which echoed throughout camp and softened the air significantly. Karlach headed to Lae’zel’s tent to have her shut off the wheel, Shadowheart kept her arm around your neck, guiding you behind Karlach. Astarion watched as each breath hiccupped in your shoulders, ignoring Lae’zel’s blunt form of comfort while he left to accompany Gale. 
“You know Astarion,” he slowly stirred the strew from the very bottom of the pot to keep anything from sticking and burning. “She keeps a close eye on you when we’re out.” 
“Don’t be ridiculous.” Astarion couldn't even try to pretend he meant that. 
“I’m not trying to be. As cold as you are, no pun intended, I think most of us can tell she has a keen interest in your wellbeing, and I would suspect that you maybe return the sentiment.” 
“I’ll have you know that not one of those earlier statements is funny or true.” Astarion tried to be coy. “Especially not now.” 
“Deflect all you want my sharp-toothed friend, but I know you do.” Gale poured a bowl for himself, and a second one for Astarion. 
“Don’t sound so sure of yourself.” He eyed the stew. “And Gale that’s just rude.” 
From the corner of his eye, you watched him expectantly, with the same look you had when he drank you up at Light Inn. Shadowheart was shaking her head and rolling her eyes while Lae’zel  spoke. “She doesn’t have to explain anything more. If she wants to sulk right now, let her.” Your Githyanki friend had this way of sounding harsh while looking concerned in her own funny way as she spoke. “Do you need more information to comfort someone you supposedly care for? Are those the teachings of Shar?” 
“You’re one to talk,” Shadowheart huffed. 
You were back and forth, looking between the two while seeming entertained. 
“Astarion, my friend.” Gale held out the bowl to him. “I’m sure you know what I’m doing.” 
He did. “Give me that.” He hissed and swiped your portion of food from Gales hand. 
You watched Shadowheart as she turned to face him. “Astarion.” 
“Shadowheart.”  
“Good evening to you.” She avoided eye contact as she folded her hands. 
Astarion bowed in a gentlemanly manner, tiling his head as he spoke to you. “I come bearing sustenance, my dear.” As you took the warm bowl from his hands Lae’zel tsked, and Karlach gave him a thumbs up despite pursing her lips. 
“I see Gale made stew?” Shadowheart kept curt. 
“I mean, I hope this is stew because if it’s not then I have no idea what she’s about to eat.” Astarion said sarcastically. “Although, in that case it’s better her than me.” 
Astarion couldn’t tell if it was a good or bad sort airy laugh you gave him before you took a bite. But you with a free hand you motioned him to lean in again. You placed the bowl between your lap on the stool to cup his ear with both of your hands. Astarion tried to get a good look at you from the corner of his eye before you left his peripheral. 
“You can feed on me again, if you’d like.” Gods you looked so pretty and venerable. 
“I think…” Astarion thought about your breath and hands on his ear and tried to shake away the thought, “I think we need to talk, later.” 
With the spoon in your mouth, you nodded again. “Okay, later.” You scooped up another bite. 
Shadowheart was about to say something when you put your hand on her arm and shook your head. “I’m good. This is good,” was said so sincerely she didn’t try to fight it. 
Astarion paid no mind to how the others reacted as he turned away to sit in his tent. The night couldn’t drag any slower even if it tried. You had disappeared into your tent after you ate, and so from in his own tent he was left to watch the rest of the weirdos interact and pretend that nothing happened. He stopped listening when Wyll started sharing some heroic tall tale and could only hope that you would still be awake after everyone else had fallen asleep. Truthfully Astarion had no reason to worry, he always found you waiting for him. 
Your lashes were wet as though you just finished crying a second time, or maybe you hadn’t stopped. “You’re early.” You massaged your jaw as you spoke. “Or have I kept you waiting?” 
“You haven’t kept anyone waiting,” he reassured. “And what’s with your jaw?” 
“Just tense.” 
Astarion hummed and squatted onto his ankles. “But you want to feed me anyways.” 
The question caught you off guard. “Yes? Well, if you need to...” 
“Hmm,” Astarion watched the ground. “You know, why do you do that to yourself?” 
“Do what?" He watched as you played with your fingers, squeezing your right hand with your left and had realized that you were studying him. 
“Weren’t you just crying earlier over something I said?” 
“It was more than that.” You caught yourself before you could elaborate and Astarion felt himself growing impatient again. 
“What do you mean more? More how?” 
The tips of your fingers turned white as you continued to squeeze and contort them. “It was just more. Beyond you, and them, and me.” As soon as you looked down at your hands you finally stretched them out in front of you for some relief. “Didn’t you say that you wanted to talk with me?” You pointed to yourself in an awkward attempt to lighten the mood. 
Astarion sucked in his lower lip and sighed. “I did, didn’t I?” 
Astarion stared at you through his lashes as he made his way onto his knees. “My dear, I wanted to talk to you-” A scornful Shadowheart appeared in his head and he winced. “Well. I more wanted to thank you.” 
“Thank me?” Your head shot up from your hands in your lap. “What did I do? You’re being a little mushy on me.” 
“I know, aren’t I full of surprises?” There was a pause as he thought about how to word what he wanted to say next and saw how the silence made you anxious. “But you stood up for me in Moonrise Towers when you didn’t have to, and respected me when I said no. I can’t even remember the last time anyone’s done that for me.” 
“Oh.” You smiled. “Of course.” 
Astarion was unsure of how to explain himself but he wanted to try. “I know I’ve talked about Cazador and the things he made me do. I would use my body to lure in any pretty thing with a pulse and push aside all the disgust that came with it because I had to.” Your hands balled up in your lap. “For a long time, it has felt like that was the only thing I know how to do. Cazador's commands became second nature, his voice still lives in my head. It’s like I forget I’m not under his control. You’ve helped me remember I don’t have to do those awful things anymore.” 
Self-consciously, you hugged yourself at your elbows and took another deep breath in. Your mouth opened to speak but only let all the air out. 
“You can ask me questions.” 
“If it filled you with disgust, if it was awful, then why did you...” You squeezed your eyes shut like you didn’t want to confirm some sinking suspicion. “Why did you sleep with me?” 
Astarion didn’t like your cautious tone. “Why are you asking like that?” 
“No, you just said- why did you sleep with me Astarion?” Your eyes bore into his. “Please just answer.” 
  “I needed you to protect me,” He observed your body as he had been while he spoke. “I needed to ensure you’d never want to leave me.” 
With your palms upright you stared at the space between you two. Astarion waited for you to say something but wasn’t sure what he expected. He didn’t know what he wanted to hear. 
“I hope you know, I would never.” was unexpected, welcome even, but it was not enough to satisfy his guilt. 
“Are you not upset with me?” 
“Do you want me to be?” Your eyes rounded with curiosity. “I just told you that I want you to know I would never leave your side, not willingly I should say.” Your voice trailed off in reflection. “I had never thought to, actually.” 
After centuries of being beaten down, torn apart and stripped of reason, you were just going to tell him that it was, okay? 
Astarion wanted to feel relieved. Astarion wanted to believe you without trembling, without balling his fists over his knees, without something telling him that should know better than to expect understanding. For years he had to get used to knowing that in Cazador's eyes he had always been below forgiveness. Especially the kind that needed no proof of his repentance. 
“What’s wrong?” Your hand fell into view, hovered above his lap and without touching him you guided his chin up so he would face you. 
Once again you were putting yourself aside to comfort him with a face that was drenched in concern. “I feel awful, you know. And you’re making this too easy. I have spent most of our time trying to seduce you, which was easy at first but then you just stopped. You just kept giving without taking which was just what I had hoped for. It was what I wanted- until suddenly it wasn’t.” Astarion shook his head when you nodded in understanding, “You knew it all along, didn’t you?” 
It was maybe a few seconds of silence but it felt like a lifetime while in his self-appointed judgement seat. 
“Not all along.” You looked up thoughtfully, “I didn’t think much of it until you wanted to bed me again." 
“Oh?” His own curiosity spoke cut through the doubt. “What gave me away?” 
“It was when you said,” Astarion winced as you cleared your throat and sat tall to give him a vivid visual of his act. “‘How about I try everyone's favorite? Just three little words? I love you'... Well,” You looked at his lap again, “it’s funny now.” You weakly smiled. Your hands flew over your mouth as your face twisted in embarrassment as Astarions mouth fell slightly open. “I realize that sounds like I wanted you to mean- well no. Yes- wait, no! I-It's not because I,” Your hands fell into your lap before you rolled your head from the ceiling down to him. “The realization hurts, but I guess conformation is worse.” 
Something about you losing your spark flitted across his mind again and without thinking, Astarion leaned in to cup your face tenderly. His cold hands clearly caught you by surprise but you didn’t move away. In his hands he held your swollen bewilderment and kind eyes. He wished he could see what you did in him. “If you’ll let me,” He traced lines over your chin, up to your eyes, the tip of your nose, before he made it back to your gaze. “I would like to have the chance to give you something real.” 
A warm smile in-between repose and disbelief made him weak. Another moment of silence passed as your eyes mapped out his expression. “Oh, shit,” you said with a slow falling simper that made your bottom lip tremble. “You mean that, don’t you...” 
“I do.” He whispered tenderly as his thumb moved to still the shake. “But only if you’ll let me.” 
You closed your eyes and let your head complete relax in his hands. Astarion took this as an opportunity to lift you closed to his face while your brows knitted together in anticipation. Slowly, he placed a kiss on your chin, your left cheek, then your right, before bringing your forehead to his lips. Your hands latched around his wrists as you pressed your head into his right hand. “Does this not bother you-?” 
“Not one bit.” He mirrored you. “But on that note, I think I need more time for intimacy. Or, maybe I don’t want that at all anymore. After everything.” His eyes dropped to your chin. 
“I can wait,” You reassured. “Whether or not that’s in vain. I don’t mind; we don’t have to have sex.” 
Astarion could feel his whole face open as he straightened his posture, and yours. His usual wit and charm were coming back to him. “Well, we’ll see if that proves to be a challenge.” 
You rolled your eyes and were about to pull away when his fingers pressed into your face to keep you still. “Yes?” 
All he could see were your lips, “May I?” 
Astarion was already moving in before you closed the distance. With your lips on his, his hand on the back of your neck, while another cradled your jaw, the only thing he could think about was just how warm you were, how soft and alive you felt on his mouth. But even in his hold he felt like he needed to chase you. You were being too gentle for his taste, too safe on his lips. Astarion was sure you could feel his growing hunger as his hand snaked to the base of your head to hold you by your hair, guiding each kiss with his neck before you finally opened your mouth, inviting him in. 
Still, it wasn’t enough. 
Astarion stood on his knees, not once letting you back away for air as he craned his neck to deepen a kiss that nearly pushed you onto your back. A drawn-out, reverberated whine melted in his ears as you pushed into his waist. But when you let go of him to support yourself, Astarion dragged his teeth on your bottom lip with a final peck before breaking away. You were panting as he sat back on the floor, smiling in his hold as his fingers were still tangled in your hair. Astarion pulled you into his arms, guiding you head into his shoulder before he drew circles on your back. As your heaving slowed, he pressed you flush against his chest like he’ll lose you if he couldn’t feel your heart against his own. “I’m sorry-” 
“Don’t be.” You held him just as tight and that seemed to finally satisfy him. 
“Thank you, my love.” 
Astarion nearly purred when you pecked his neck. “Don’t mention it.” 
Š 2024 chimimon
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obsessedwhyyes ¡ 2 days ago
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Astarion fanfic enjoyers, I am doing a science.
This is out of sheer curiosity more than anything! The differences between Tumblr and AO3 in terms of what does well and what doesn't elude and confuse me.
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itshelia ¡ 1 year ago
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Taking anti-depressant pills?? Seeing a therapist??? Journaling???? No need babe, my fav writer just dropped another x reader fic.
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stars-and-clouds ¡ 1 year ago
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HE DIDN'T WANT TO LET GO HE DIDN'T WANT TO LET GO HE DIDN'T WANT TO LET GO!!! -screams-
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connorsui ¡ 3 months ago
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"How beautiful was she?"
"Was? ...please ..she is beautiful, but not like those girls in magazines. She is beautiful, for the way she thinks, She is beautiful for the sparkle in her eyes when she speaks about anything she loves. She is beautiful for her ability to make other people smile, even if she was sad. No, she wasn't beautiful for something as temporary as her looks. She is beautiful, deep down to her soul ....
She is the love of my life"
The man: Nanami Kento, Geto Suguru, John Price, Jason Todd, Sam Winchester, Higuruma Hiromi, Halsin, Astarion Zayne, Sylus, Xavier, Levi Ackerman, Simon Riley, Johnny Mactavish, Leon Kennedy, Aizawa, Dabi, Hawks, Rafayel, Cooper Howard, Logan Howlett, Aemond, Nikto,
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cheekylittlepupp ¡ 1 year ago
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Whoever was responsible for the kiss scene at Larian...
the way his hand slowly moves up....
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ramen-flavored ¡ 6 months ago
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colonelarr0w ¡ 7 months ago
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Astarion, once he's comfortable with you, is definitely the type of man to sleepily reach for you when he realizes that you've rolled out of his arms at night.
Like the moment, and I mean the moment, that he doesn't feel you wrapped up in his arms, he's up. Sure, he's groggy as all hell and he can't properly see anything around him -- but all he knows is that he's not holding you when he most definitely should be.
He'll push himself up onto his elbows, squinting to see that you've turned yourself away from him and rolled out of his arms. Your back is turned to him, but he knows that it wasn't intentional.
With a fanged yawn, Astarion reaches for you again. His arms loop around your waist and turn you around, tucking your head beneath his chin. Instinctively, your legs tangle with his own, your arms adjusting to wrap around his midsection.
He grins to himself, content again.
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zg0nuwa ¡ 1 year ago
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i’m not switching between my hyperfixations because i’m autistic, i’m just a whore
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sabersandsnipers ¡ 1 year ago
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Drabbles: Just One Bed
Featuring: Astarion, Gale, Halsin, Lord Gortash
Inspiration courtesy of @creativepromptsforwriting
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Astarion
There’s only one pillow. So you and Astarion have to share. Neither of you want the annoyance of waking up with neck pain. And after arguing for a bit, you realize neither of you is winning.
Despite trying his best to keep distance between you, it’s incredibly difficult while trying to share a pillow. His body cradles yours. His lips nearly touch the back of your neck. For a while he manages to keep his hands to himself, but as his eyes grow heavy, his arm snakes its way around your waist.
Your body feels like its on fire despite his cold skin. You’re worried the rapid beat of your heart will keep him awake.
Somehow sleep eventually finds you. In the middle of the night, you roll over to find a more comfortable position. When you wake up, you find your face buried in Astarion’s chest.
He himself hasn’t slept since you rolled into him. He’s kept his arm slung over you, though, and has listened to your steady breathing all night.
When you attempt to move away from him, his grip around you automatically tightens. You freeze, waiting for him to realize you’re awake, but he doesn’t let go. He doesn’t want to. He can’t remember the last time he felt this relaxed. Your body is warm and soft, and he never wants to leave this bed.
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Gale
The bed is roomy, which you’re grateful for. There should be plenty of space for you two. There’s no blanket though, so Gale roots through the closet for one.
Gale clears his throat, and you turn your attention to him holding up a rather small blanket. One that definitely would not cover the whole bed.
“You have it,” he hands it to you. “I’ll be fine.”
You hesitate. “Are you sure?”
“Most definitely,” he replies, already making his way to the bed.
You climb in next to him, pulling the blanket up to your chin. It’s barely big enough to cover your own person. You look to Gale, who’s turned away from you. He looks so exposed, and frankly, uncomfortable.
“Gale?” you say.
“Hm?” he turns to look at you.
“Do you want to share?” you ask. You hold up the blanket so he can slide in.
He doesn’t need to be asked twice. He scooches over to you, and you let the blanket drop around you two. You let out a sigh of contentment as the warmth of Gale’s body presses against you. You usually run cold, so you’re grateful he accepted your offer.
He wraps his arms around you, because there’s no other way for you two to get comfortable. In the night, he even drapes a leg over you. You don’t mind, you even find yourself nuzzling into him, seeking every bit of warmth you can.
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Halsin
A rainstorm tears your tent in the night. The cold splatter of rain on your face wakes you. Your bedroll is soaked, along with most of your belongings. You groan, getting out of bed so you can seek shelter with a companion. 
Out of all the tents before you, Halsin’s calls to you. You know it’ll be the warmest. Before you can talk yourself out of it, you make your way to his tent. 
You poke your head in. “Halsin?”
He wakes, an alarmed look on his face. “What is it?”
“My tent ripped. Can I stay with you?” A shiver slinks through your body. 
He nods. “Of course.”
He opens his bed roll a bit, and you see he’s naked. Your jaw drops. You hesitate, part of you feeling like you’re crossing a line. 
But then another shiver hits you, and you practically run into his arms. You sigh as you slide into the warmth of his bedroll. 
Halsin groans. “You’re freezing.” 
  “I know.” You don’t hesitate to press up against him, soaking in all his warmth. 
  “You’ll warm up soon,” he says, rubbing your back. Then his voice hits your ear. “You’d warm sooner if you removed your clothes as well.” 
Your stomach drops. You know if you do this, your companionship is going to get a bit complicated. But the thought of his hot skin against yours is too tempting.
He helps you out of your clothes, your heart fluttering the whole time. When you’re fully naked, he pulls you into his chest. Your heart pounds, but you relax against the heat of him. 
He fully cocoons you, wrapping a thick leg around you to pull you even closer. You feel your body start to warm, and the shivers start to cease. You try to ignore how perfectly lined up you are to him. You know sleep will be impossible like this, but it’s worth it to spend the night in his warm embrace.
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Gortash
You may have had one drink too many. The wine Enver provided for you was far too good to go to waste. And waste you did not.  The last thing you remember is the soft cushioning of a bed before darkness took you. 
The harsh morning light wakes you. The first sensation that hits you is that of a pounding headache. The next is that of a pair of strong arms encircling you. 
Confusion hits you. You don’t remember going to bed with anyone. You feel your underwear is on, so nothing happened with whoever is in the bed with you. 
You slowly turn your body to see who this mystery person is. You’re met with the strong face of Lord Gortash. Butterflies fill your belly. He simply invited you over for dinner, and here he is letting you sleep in his bed. 
He’s sound asleep, his soft breathing evidence of the relaxed state he’s in. He’s sleeping shirtless, and you tentatively place your palms against his strong chest. You feel the strong muscles rippling under his skin. 
He stirs slightly and you quickly hide your face against his chest. He shifts, his chest hairs tickling your skin. His powerful arms hold you so gently.
With your headache forgotten, and Enver’s body sending waves of warmth through you, sleep finds you again.
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bloodsuckingfiends ¡ 8 months ago
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Astarion likes missionary sex. Likes being able to see his love’s face and the way their body reacts to his.
He loves being able to lace his fingers with theirs, and press their hands to the mattress. It grounds him just as much as the steady eye contact does. Doesn’t matter if he has to coax them into it, murmuring “eyes on me, darling” as he rolls his hips into theirs.
He loves the way he can hold them close to his chest as he comes with their thighs wrapped around him, completely engulfed in one another.
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anotherdarkiboi ¡ 1 year ago
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List of Astarion's Terms of Endearment
This is for the fanfic writers haha. Tell me if I'm missing any so can add it in!
Darling (his most used)
My love, love
My sweet
“You sweet, generous thing”, “you sweet little thing”
Lover
My dear, a dear, dear
Beautiful
Cheeky little pup
My little treat ("-with their cheeks all flushed")
Sweetie
Pet
You wicked little thing (affectionate)
"You're a sweetheart", "you sweetheart"
Delectable little pet (not directed towards Tav but it easily could be)
My friend (yay, we're his friend)
My favorite traveling companion (not a pet name but it's nice to be his favorite)
My leaking blood-bag (technically you refer to yourself as that first and he calls you his one after, but it counts)
You little scoundrel
Edit: Thank you everyone in the comments for adding the Dark Urge ones!
Bhaal-babe (I'm dead, this silly pun I swear)
My sweet, bloodthirsty friend
My precious little Bhaal-babe
My conflicted villain
My dagger-happy friend
Bonus: Ascended Yandere Astarion
My pet, pet
Little love
Precious thing
My treasure
My consort, My Dark Consort
My favorite spawn
Insolent little- (the Dev's notes say that the full line is "you insolent little brat" which, um...)
Insolent little pup (the line was in EA, although I’m not entirely sure if it’s Ascended Astarion. Full line: “you are an insolent little pup, aren’t you?”)
"You ingrate" (When you try to break up with him. It's not really a pet name, but-)
"Property I cherish, but still my property" (his thoughts)
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