#they arent wrong tho. is the thing
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about ready
#pokemon#swsh#gym leader raihan#ft. flygon#had a vivid vision of this pose the other day and had to draw it. thats all thank you#I think after flygon's first appearance in anipoke whenever it comes up again the artists just go ''fuck it whatever''#and draw the legs however they want. it's basically a dinosaur in pmd#this is good for me bc I dont know shit abt fuck#flygon poses really well for how kinda awkward it looks on its own... but I also think abt like#duraludon being in the carwash. practically all the time its all I think about tbh#rest assured.#mim's infected me with the goggles vision I see raihan now I immediately wanna put a goggles on that man#they arent wrong tho. is the thing#is flygon an insect or a reptile.... the tail suggest something like a dragonfly but the neck doesnt seem to have#the shell structure that'd let it bend. thats at least skin#well. flygon is shapes. thats what it is. I enjoy it#I should sleep now... so many things happened today#I really gotta prep the fish tomorrow. dang. so many things on the list for tomorrow too...#have a good night lads. achieve flight
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taking my time with three houses since its been a while, exploring everything, and i actually went to the library to read (shocking!), and man i forgot how much i enjoy the depth of lore in this game. i know that with detailed lore comes the unfortunate years of discourse, but putting that aside this shit is so cool. now i need to get past the mock battle so i can go to the sewers and read all the books seteth banned. what are you hiding mr sexy green man…..
#ann in fodlan#i love seteth i do#and banning books is a horrible thing to do BUT#this isnt real. this time the hiding of information is a little sexy#like he shouldnt do that but like. LMAO ok man. ur a funny little guy. a real deviant#i do think that while yes in real life the hiding of books is evil and bad and you shouldnt do that#seteth and also rhea arent real and their motivations for doing so are good#were they wrong? well maybe. it does hinder technological progress but obviously you can see WHY seteth would go to this extreme#bc theyre not. evil 😭😭😭#definitely a little old tho
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As the conspiracy reaches its finale, the Void Hunter joins the fight.
Uncover the Conspiracy in Zenless Zone Zero's All-New Version "A Storm of Falling Stars", S-Rank Agent Hoshimi Miyabi is here! With S-Rank Agent Asaba Harumasa Limited-Time Giveaway! Pre-register to obtain additional rewards.
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#i never really thought about a person being a finite thing. you can see the effects of a person after they die. in the unfinished projects.#in the rooms of clutter. in abandoned closets. in pictures and in mermered phrases. and you can see time#chipping away at those things. eroding away the evidance that a person existed. clothes move into other people's closets. projects are boxed#away. and a person becomes confined to photos and memories. and thats existentially terrifying but its not a bad thing. time erodes away all#things. that's how life works. matter and energy transforms.#we arent made to last forever. i dunno. i guess im still just rattled from being home even tho ive been back a week and a half.#and my brain tends to fixate on the wrong things. nearly 27 years of knowing someone eclipsed by a visual sequence lasting less than a day.#bc i just cant get over how scary it would be to die like that. to start losing control of your body. to not be able to feed yourself or get#to the bathroom. to have your mind be overcome by the toxins building up in your mangled and broken body.#and it could have been worse. it could have been a lot worse. but its still not fair. theres no good way to die. i dunno. i guess i just#miss my mom in some abstract way but i find it more viscerally upsetting to think about the people that have to deal with her absence.#it makes me sad that my dad is alone now. i dunno. grief doesnt feel like i thought it would. most of the time i dont even know what im#crying about. its undirected. it doesnt feel like: i miss you. it feels like: youre gone. how can you be gone? why does everything feel the#same? and its not that it doesnt make sense. its that nothings changed. the terror of that.#and im walking around in an acumulation of my dead mother's clothes. and no one knows. theyll never know.#and there's nothing to be done about it. so it goes.#i guess im just sad. and its hard to breathe at the thought of returning to school at the end of August.#unrelated
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no interest in any of my hobbies next to no concerts going on all summer feeling abandoned by the majority of the few irls I still have no idea where to meet new people to replace them now that I'm not part of the highly social hard partying sales culture I spent basically all of my post college life in anymore literally what reason is there to keep trying
#how does anyone even maintain anything in the long term like since college i dont think ive managed to hold onto a truly close relationship#for more than like 3 years so its about time even tho i never even felt i reached that level of closeness w these guys its about time they#also just move on & im the only one putting on the effort! the last time i felt like i had someone i could really call a 'best friend' they#went on vacation & ended up just actually moving away without telling me & when theyre back in town they text our other friends to ltk &#hang out with them but never me & i only ever see them at parties. similar shot for any other 'close friends' i ever thought actually cared#about me. whats wrong with me why dont people ever want to stay around why is it whenever things come up or people get busy or whatever im#never a priority to anyone everwhy is it always i put in the effoet or we dont talk ot reslly i put in the effoet until eventually we dont#talk anyways. why does it seem like even if it isnt easy for everyone else it seems like its at least POSSIBLE people will tell me oh that#happens to everyone in adulthood i feel that way too. ok sure you at least TALK to your college friends still even if you arent as close as#you used to be i have fucking nothing exvept a handful of people who just kind of care about me but where im in the periphery of their lives#i could just die & itd probably take weeks before any of my 'friends' even noticed#texticles
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#got#this is about tommen but could apply to both of them here tbh. cersei's outfits arent that bad tho theyre just kinda. bland#esp s4-6 where she only wears black. s7-8 are straight up atrocious tho. specifically *that one* you know the one#what is wrong with him why is he always in brown-grey. at his own wedding too girl are you allergic to serving. wear black at least#you cant really see it here but i swear the texture on this fabric looks like a hairshirt#ig it would make sense if he started dressing like that after the whole crusty pope thing but no this is his default state#do you think he was like 'i swear i'll never be like my evil brother 😤' and that included the drip#also what's with that like. black turtleneck he's always wearing. i swear he has it in every scene#when you're holding court at 7 but have to present the new iphone at 8
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i am a hypocrite when it comes to warrior cats shipping because I will gripe and moan about even unrequited cinderfire from dawn til dusk because i think it is weird and boring and makes cinderpelt's character worse, however, i will clap and cheer for unrequited cindersand despite it being literally just the exact same thing except gay and less direct and they never interact in canon
#don't get me wrong they both suck if requited bc tpb sets this very clear distinction between how like#cinder is written in age compared to fire and the others even tho they arent actually that far apart#but yeah anyways if fandom people are able to complain about '''''gay shippers ruining same gender friendships'''''#I'm allowed to do the same thing in reverse with c!nderfire. they are just besties the crush was just comphet sorry#also to clarify there is nothing morally wrong w unrequited cindrfire it just pisses me off personally lol#there is nothing wrong if you like the existence of the crush
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there's a point at which someone's fear of being a dick wraps back around to them just being a dick anyways
#im side-eyeing those who reblogged my post on ethnocentrism and missed the point#but im also thinking about the tags i saw on being too scared to comment on fic#the first is being ~too scared~ to write cultures other than their own#(1. my point was people should be learning *as they watch the show* not just when they write#2. i just. jfC. stop saying youre too scared to *try* to write from another culture/POV different from your own as tho its a *good* thing)#the second is just annoying/frustrating because being too scared to participate in community is how community's die#i dont want to be dismissive of cancel culture because i do know the stories and there is always indv cases of a person ready to be a dick#but like. its just *not* a thing most people have to be worried about. very likely you're just not big enough to have that concern.#anxiety's no joke but like. u dont just accept the anxiety as the excuse. you have to challenge it. i've been there but u cant feed it.#and i dont want to sound dismissive of that anxiety but im really frustrated with seeing people throw that excuse around#without considering how their fear-based attitudes/actions come off in turn#such as not showing fandom creatives any appreciation for fear of saying the ~wrong~ thing#which comes off as creatives' stuff seeming to be ignored completely or otherwise very discouraging silence#when the only rule for tags/comments is to treat others the way you wish to be treated and apologize if you accidentally tread a toe#and being more worried about accidentally stepping on a theoretical persons toe than interested in showing actual people gratitude#like? pretty sure im not the only one side-eyeing that like ''have u really considered this feeling/logic????''#again: its not saying that anxiety isnt a dick or easy to dismiss but i am saying maybe challenge it or at least reflect on it#i just#blahh#the commenting thing is way more mild than the other but tags arent for that conversation and i need a much better brain space for that one
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Find someone slightly annoying but in really small harmless ways so I decide none of the behaviours are worth bringing up with them → realizing: hey, Im also annoying! solidarity! → realizing we have a lot in common and starting to bond → finding out other people find this person annoying and are vocal about it behind their back → finding out this person has ADHD like me that's (at least one reason) why we have all these traits in common → fear.
#trying to be as vague as possible even tho this is someone I know offline and no one involved follows me online#on one level I get it that relying someone who is forgetful and does things slower/differently than you can be frustrating#but like its a medical condition. and u dont need to know someones medical info to have some empathy instead of assuming malice/incompetence#i just found out they have adhd today but day one i was able to go 'wow i did not like the way they handled that but i dont think they were#being hurtful/careless we just handle this task differently. rhey didnt do anything wrong and i can let this go and adjust my expectations'#not to say im perfect and never ableist towards others. my first reaction to seeing traits i dislike in myself (from my disabilities)#in others is often to get annoyed and needing to adjust my thinking#i get annoyed with myself when I cant focus / cant be coherent or concise / cant finish tasks quickly etc#→ get annoyed sometimes when I see others doing that → realize thats not fair to them → realize thats not fair to myself#→ assume good intentions and find ways to communicate/collaborate better with them → get along better and maybe make a new friend!#sorry i am rambling#idk its scary seeing someone being disliked for adhd symptoms/traits that im mostly doing a good job of managing/hiding in this#social environment so far and knowing that could happen to me in the future#but im also like ready to have this persons back#me 🤝 them: prioritizing the wrong tasks and overexplaining things and struglging to get our points across#and not noticing when we talk too loud and forgetting tasks halfway thru etc#not to be that guy but : without love it canmot be seen!!!!#lifes so much better if u just assume ppl arent doing things a certain way to be annoying + let go of / adapt to the thing that are annoying#but not harmful#thats not exactly what without love it cant be seen means but thats one of the ways i apply it in life#just like dont assume malice. assume u dont have all the info. approach ppl/situations with empathy.#or youll make yourself more miserable needlessly#again like only for shit that's not harmful obv#i need to shut up and go to bed
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Also I got my essay exam back today. Full points!!! Which was a surprise bc my 4th essay was definitely lower quality than the other three (bc I rushed it), but still good enough to get full points!!!!
Makes me wonder what that other one I spied being a 1 was like 🤔🤔🤔 bro was NOT good at writing I guess.
#speculation nation#weird grading scale. each essay was rated 0 thru 3. 0 being Real Bad or just plain wrong.#1 being Okay. 2 being Good. and 3 being Excellent. according to what my professor explained.#and all the points for all 4 essays were totaled. so since i got 3s on all 4 i got 12/12 points.#but he also said it's not like percentage based for the grades. 3s earn As 2s earn Bs and 1s earn Cs. presumably.#so even if u got a 4/12 thats not failing. still not very good tho.#i realized when i was writing that it really has been a while since ive done a proper essay. im a techie not a literature student.#i do scientific reports so much more than fucking Essays.#i tried to dust off the old skills tho and i guess i did pretty good overall. tho i wonder. it feels like he was pretty lax in grading.#bc im being honest my last essay was Not Good in structure. i was rushing bigtime. i just wanted it done.#but i guess bc i answered all the questions and was generally good at diction (creative writing Does help with this)#it was still good enough to be a 3. which makes me So Curious how bad that person did to get a 1......#i only caught a peek when i was grabbing mine. couldnt look too in depth.#ALSO THO tuesday's presenter got a 7.6 As Opposed To my 8.6!!! professor gave them a 7 (as opposed to my 8)#which makes me feel a little better about how i did. (this scale out of 9 lol). bc like. i did better than them at least!!#felt a lil bad for today's presenter. she was clearly getting kind of frazzled. it rly is hard to present for an hour.#we write out critiques for every presentation. stuff we liked and stuff we didnt. unfortunately i had criticisms to give 😔#but i try to sandwich it with good things too. so it's not All bad things. i still feel bad critiquing them#but such is the review expectations. i try to at least be fair about it.#(to clarify. grades arent announced to the class. i just sit right up front near where he puts the papers and im Nosy lol)
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okay this is fun. explain your espighty through bingo
honestly this one doesn't even matter cause the only thing that matters to me is that they are funny
#for a while everyone thinks they are dating when they arent#but then they actually start dating and nothing changes so vector and charmy keep thinking they are not dating#but then they break up and things change and vector is like 'oh are you guys dating' 'WE BROKE UP' 'whats fucking wrong with u 2'#and the cycle continues#they have one of those on and off relationships that everyone is fucking tired of being around while they bicker#then they mellow out as adults and stuff stabilizes#they still bicker tho#and even tho they fight they still get the job done as the chaotix#ive come to the conclusion i dont even care that much about the romance part of shipping#i just like funny things thats the main component
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i hate reblogging something and getting excited to look thru their blog cus fheir stuff is cool,
and then i get blasted with the anti endo beam??
like. sorry ig????
im not changing my stance just cuz i thought someone seemed cool, unforch
#anyway this is really nothing in the scheme of things.#i think syscourse is fucking stupid <3#theres bigger problems to worry about than infighting. idk.#idk it feels the same as the infighting of the queer community.#can we save the infighting to when we arent nasty stigmatized and. idk. locked in rooms and yelled at to integrate but i mean#what do I know. im just a dirty endo supporter i guess.#idk.#i think everyones valid as long as they arent malicious about it.#“oh i hate endos cuz theyre abusive”;×=[#wrong. youre generalizing. you can be abused just as bad by a traumagenic system as you can by an endogenic system.#also i dont think everyone should have to 1000% know their systems origins forever and always to be seen as “valid” in someone else's eyes.#idk tho thats just my thoughs maybe im just a dirty fool <3#wilburs post#before you start calling us an endo or whatever as an insult or something. were absolutely traumagenic. and i think the labels are stupid#and only useful in a therapy setting. or for self work.#sorry im apparently Not done ranting.#i think proudly flaunting that you exist due to trauma is foolish. despite me clarifying.#people are going to be malicious. people are going to be mean and find your trauma just to rub it in your face.#ig the lables are okay for finding similar lived experiences too but. man.#shut up stop fighting people youre in the same boat with
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As the conspiracy reaches its finale, the Void Hunter joins the fight.
Uncover the Conspiracy in Zenless Zone Zero's All-New Version "A Storm of Falling Stars", S-Rank Agent Hoshimi Miyabi is here! With S-Rank Agent Asaba Harumasa Limited-Time Giveaway! Pre-register to obtain additional rewards.
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🦋
#my doc had a field day but ultimately did not give me any form of clarity on whether or not my conflicting issues#are a sign of this bipolar they are treating w several meds at this point or just like. what a personality is LMAO.#something something platos cave. something something where do things like 'emotions'&'abstract thought' ultimately fall#on the divided line if they arent applied to further intellectual pursuit?#IS pursuit of the center of oneself an intellectual one at its core???#... my doc will not have answers if i bring this to her lmao. she will tell me its irrelevant&she will be correct#... im not wrong tho lmao.
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#aaaand that's 2 doctors that think i have bipolar ii 🙃#so the conceptualize rn would b that my mood is fucked but im using ocd to keep myself contained withing sorta normal parameters#which. i mean. that does kinda fit with observationally. i would create rules around: u arent allowed to get excited abt things u arent#allowed to enjoy things bc u cant handle it. u cant b normal abt how u enjoy things. or bc when i go to enjoy a thing#my mood is caped at being lightly miserable so its like well fuck being around ppl it makes me feel nothing#bc my focus and energy swing around like the light on a lighthouse. and in between that im miserable or feel nothing#and if its true that i am bipolar the reason i never noticed would b bc i very rarely experience euphoria. mostly i have high energy and#dont feel good. just fucking out of control. so mixed episodes i guess. but like idk. i guess i just think of bipolar as being extremely#destructive. and i mean r my mood issues a problem? yes. sometimes a really big problem. but idk. im still resistant to thr idea#lots of ppl get misdiagnosed as bipolar even tho the presentation is so specific. i guess i just doesn't wanna accept it and then have to#have been wrong if i was misdiagnosed. but i mean 2 doctors independently listened to me and thought hm sounds like bipolar so maybe im#just being stubborn. also no one else in my family thst i kno of is bipolar. ive got 2 uncles with adhd but not bipolar relatives#i dunno. i guess it doesn't matter so long as i can get it under control. im good at control. destructively good at control#unrelated#i guess its more that ive never done anything life ruining bc of my moods#mostly i just dont sleep much and make myself crazy. so ill probably die an early death or whatever lack og sleep causes rio#i meant rip lol
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Oh my god Latios saying he'll go through Pitfall Valley wandering for the rest of his life because he thinks that's going to be Latias's fate regardless and "two is better than one"... oh my god
#how did i not pay the eon duo much attention before. i love sibling stories#ESPECIALLY if theyre tragic#echoed voice#btw side tangent from the movies but i hate how some canon material acts like only latias can disguise herself as a human and latios cant#when in the japanese version of heroes at least they EXPLICITLY say he can. he even does it in the japanese opening#like the manga apparently has it so that only latias can do it and latios exclusively has sight sharing#even tho nothing in heroes implies that its only latios who can sight share? its mostly just him cause latias is with ash mostly#and they needed to find him and not the other way around. latias just never had to initiate anything on her own end#like yeah its cool to give each of them something only they can do but those arent exactly parallel abilities yknow?#also it just rubs me the wrong way that like only the girl can become human. gives me an off vibe. esp with how she gets characterized#or portrayed ig#idk what else you could do to give them exclusive but parallel abilities but idk those two things dont feel right as that#maybe just having their signature moves be different is good enough? idk?#pmd posting
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god i rarely write chubby!reader fics because my fics by default dont include any (intentional) descriptors to paint reader as thin or fat or any race so that they're accessible for everyone. but i saw some absolutely rancid takes and i lowkey wanna write another multi-part chubby reader fic. i should finish some plans tbh
#wooahaes.txt#i dont know who needs to hear this but... the existence of chubby!reader fics does not take away from other body types representation#a lot of fics default to having a thin reader most likely because the author is writing from their own experience.#there's literally nothing wrong with that as long as the author puts a warning on the fic for specifying a body type#like imo you can really write anything you want as long as you put the proper warnings in place so that readers can pick and choose--#--what they want to read yknow? not everyones gonna relate to a fic and thats okay#its the same thing as reading published books with a protag who best resembles you#nothing wrong with looking for the rep! but its not like its taking away from 'other' ppls rep to have a plus size protag#and so forth! but genuinely like... a lot of reader fics default to having a thin reader#my works dont and i have mutuals who write in a similar manner (and i love them v much for it mwah mwah)#and they typically dont have any warning that reader is written to be thin. we just kinda have to see it for ourselves and usually click of#its why i try to be careful in tagging my works accordingly so people know what they're getting into#anyway thats enough rambling. i'll eventually come back around and write another chubby!fem!reader fic#i have a chris one ive been thinking about for a whiiiiile now and its got some very cute moments teehee#i'll try to have an alternate fic being uploaded around the same time too for ppl who arent interested in a chubby!reader fic tho! <3
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As the conspiracy reaches its finale, the Void Hunter joins the fight.
Uncover the Conspiracy in Zenless Zone Zero's All-New Version "A Storm of Falling Stars", S-Rank Agent Hoshimi Miyabi is here! With S-Rank Agent Asaba Harumasa Limited-Time Giveaway! Pre-register to obtain additional rewards.
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man.
#i had this whole post ive been trying to formulate for so so long. abt my issues w ceewilbur and ccwilburisms and#to clarify i do like cwilb he is one of my faves. ik it may seem i wanna bite his arm off smtimes and i Do but#its mostly bitterness directed to the stuff Around him if that makes sense. yk the response to lots abt him#the way the overcompensation abt how he can be villanized swinging into a state where he Cant and never Did and wrong and if you critique#or acknowledge it you get snipped at and demeaned and treated like its a targeted hit on the mentally ill when its like#a mild disagreement with one of the most popular characters in the fanbase Easily#and w cc wil i do think he is just sm guy. im sure he's a nice dude idrc abt the ccs usually but he seems alright enough even tho he has v#goofy ahh takes and opinions but that doesnt make you Evil#but when i dive into what really has made me feel so alienated and snippy its. llmao its the racism yeah lol its super very much the racism#its very very prevelent and very common and very unchallenged. and it like. upsets me so bad its why i keep bailing on making my actual#full detailed post abt it. cuz everytime i try to formulate my thoughts i just get upset and frustrated i wanna rip my hair out#its hard not to feel like im talking to a wall when its so common and unchecked and. ive seen rightful critiques of these spaces and how#ppl interact with them Openly Mocked and brushed aside and treated like 'petty sensative internet drama' that ppl need to 'just get over'#sorry man im a fucking 🇲🇽 i cant exactly log off and Stop Experiencing Racism. and sorry that me feeling alienated and tired and sad abt#it is an inconvenience for you llol#and like idk. im not upset w anyone in particular this isnt a call out post or vague who give a shit and.#eh maybe im stupid but i really really believe a lot of ppl arent doing it on purpose#its just bein parroted ik i get it but#am i rlly not allowed to be tired? why should it feel like my responsibility to hold ppls hand and go hey mb treat poc and darker skinned#ppl like ppl. maybe you should examine why you need so many things made palatable to you through conventionally attractive whiteness first#idk. idk!!! am i crazy who fucking knows#but it has been weighing on me stupid style so bad#the shrinking fanbase and primarily yk common stragglers has just. rlly felt like a magnifying glass to my already existing issues abt it#idk man. idk im tired and im at work its 100°+ and my head hurts so this is all yr getting. lea me alone#and again this isnt a vague who Cares. just wanted to get it off my chest finally#huri.txt#discourse#<- ig
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