#they are also just incredibly fun to make

[sh4nksslvt]

Doctor Trafalgar, Love Expert?

Law gives terrible love advice to Penguin while clearly ignoring his own painfully obvious crush on you.

Law X gn! reader | ONE SHOT

tags: fluff, sfw, friends-to-lovers typeshi(?) law being timid

a/n: this js me trying to write ffs, this is experimental and for fun only, so expect this ffs a bit cringe

word count: 1.1k

masterlist | ko-fi

: 𓏲🐋 ๋࣭  ࣪ ˖✩࿐࿔ 🌊

If there was one thing Trafalgar Law wasn’t qualified to do, it was give romantic advice.

Sure, he was a brilliant surgeon, a pirate captain, and had a smirk that could make a nun sin, but when it came to feelings—specifically his own—he was a flaming shipwreck in a storm of emotional denial.

And yet, here he was, arms crossed, giving unsolicited love advice to Penguin like he was the therapist from a soap opera.

“Just tell her she’s inefficient,” Law said with a straight face. “It’s a compliment.”

Bepo blinked up at him. “...Captain, I don’t think calling Penguin’s crush inefficient is going to help his chances.”

“You asked for honesty,” Law muttered, flipping through his medical journal like it was more interesting than this disaster in progress. “Efficiency is attractive.”

“To you, maybe!”

You, meanwhile, were watching this entire trainwreck from the galley door with a cup of tea and the kind of secondhand embarrassment that deserved its own trauma counseling.

“Law,” you called. “Did you just say ‘inefficient’ as a flirting tactic?”

He didn’t even look up. “It’s a practical compliment.”

You snorted. “What’s next? ‘Your presence improves my survival odds by 6.4%’?”

“…Depending on the environment, that’s a generous estimate.”

You and Bepo shared a look. A look that screamed, Why is this our captain?

The whole thing had started that morning when Penguin had walked into the common area in a flurry of nerves and confessed, “I think I like someone.”

Law, who’d been reading while pretending not to be listening to music in one earbud (yes, he still used wired ones, don’t ask), barely lifted his gaze. “Then tell them.”

Penguin shuffled. “It’s not that easy.”

“It’s the truth.”

“And what if they don’t like me back?”

Law gave the emotional equivalent of a shrug. “Then adapt. Rejection is survivable.”

Penguin groaned from the couch. “Cap, you can’t treat love like it’s battle tactics.”

“It’s a high-risk operation involving fragile variables and potential bloodshed. Sounds pretty accurate.”

Shachi nodded. “Okay, that’s fair, but also incredibly bleak.”

And that’s when Law was voluntold by everyone that if he was going to act like he knew how love worked, he had to give actual advice.

Hence: Doctor Trafalgar, Love Expert?

“Okay,” you said, taking the empty seat beside him and plucking the journal from his hands. “If you’re so good at giving advice, help me out.”

Law narrowed his eyes. “With what?”

“I think someone likes me,” you said casually, leaning back like you weren’t about to stir up the most delicious chaos. “But I can’t tell if they’re just awkward or trying to be subtle.”

His jaw tightened. “Who is it?”

You shrugged. “I don’t know. That’s why I need your expert opinion.”

Law closed the journal and set it down very deliberately.

Everyone in the room went very still. Bepo, Penguin, and Shachi exchanged silent screams with their eyebrows.

“Well,” Law said coolly. “What are the signs?”

“Hmm,” you hummed. “They hover a lot. Make excuses to talk to me. Kind of avoid eye contact but also stare when they think I’m not looking.”

His eye twitched. “Stare?”

“Yeah. And once, they brought me extra rice even though I didn’t ask.”

Silence.

Law stood up. “That’s suspicious.”

“Oh?”

“Sounds like they’re trying too hard.”

“Ohhh?” you said, biting back a smile.

“They’re probably nervous. Emotionally constipated. Bad at expressing feelings.” He said all this like he wasn’t describing himself to an absurdly accurate degree. “Possibly repressed.”

“Should I confront them?”

“No,” he said quickly, a little too quickly. “Absolutely not.”

“Why not?”

“It might scare them away.”

“But if they like me…”

“Then wait for them to say something first.”

Bepo coughed. “So… basically just let them suffer in silence?”

“It builds character,” Law said.

You covered your mouth to hide your grin. “You’re such a romantic.”

Law’s ears turned pink. “Shut up.”

Later that day, Shachi cornered you near the engine room with a look of deep judgment.

“You’re torturing him.”

“I have no idea what you mean.”

He pointed a wrench at you. “You know he likes you.”

“Do I?”

“You’ve been fake-flirting with a ghost for the last week just to get him to react!”

You smirked. “It’s good cardio.”

Shachi groaned. “He’s gonna combust. I saw him look up love confession rituals on his snail phone last night.”

Your eyes widened. “No.”

“Yes! And he accidentally joined a forum for single dads in North Blue.”

You wheezed. “He’s going through it.”

“So help him out!”

“…Fine.”

The opportunity came the next morning when you walked into the kitchen and found Law staring at a mug of coffee like it had personally betrayed him.

He didn’t look up when you entered, just mumbled, “Morning.”

“Morning,” you said, walking over. “Sleep okay?”

He made a grunt of vague disapproval.

You sat beside him. “Thinking about your crush?”

He choked on his coffee.

“I mean,” you said, oh-so-innocently. “That mystery person you gave advice about.”

His eyes narrowed. “You’re very nosy.”

“You’re very obvious.”

He gave you a look. “I don’t have a crush.”

You tilted your head. “Are you sure? Because everyone on this ship seems to think you do.”

“Everyone on this ship is bored.”

“Bored enough to notice how you go quiet when I talk, how you walk into rooms I’m in and pretend it’s for unrelated reasons, or how you stare at my lips when I eat dessert?”

He went dead silent.

You leaned closer. “So. Doctor Trafalgar. Any prescriptions for yourself?”

“…Shut up,” he muttered, face flushed.

You blinked. “Wait. That was a confession.”

He got up.

You grabbed his wrist.

He froze.

“Hey,” you said, suddenly softer. “I like you too, dumbass.”

He blinked.

You reached into your pocket and pulled out a little red candy. “I was going to make you say it first, but you looked like you were about to diagnose yourself with heartbreak.”

He blinked again.

“…You like me?”

“God, yes. Even when you’re being a brick wall with nice tattoos.”

“…I have more than just tattoos,” he muttered.

You grinned. “Yeah, you’ve also got a charming inability to express affection. It’s cute.”

He shook his head. “You’re insufferable.”

“You’re blushing.”

“I’m leaving.”

“You’re still holding my hand.”

Pause.

He looked down.

He was.

“…Tch.”

You laughed and tugged him back down. “Stay.”

“…Fine.”

Later, Penguin came in to find the two of you sitting shoulder to shoulder, quietly sharing a plate of snacks.

“Captain?” Penguin said, tilting his head. “Did you take your own advice?”

Law didn’t look up. “No.”

You grinned. “He took mine.”

[the-everqueen]

this AND Remmick is very much a metaphor for the white record producers who capitalized on Black roots music in the early 20th century.

i highkey recommend everyone read Matthew Morrison's Blacksound: Making Race and Popular Music in the United States, but tl;dr: many early successful music publication houses and later record labels in the U.S. were started by second or third generation Irish-Americans or Jewish Americans. the ethnic demographics are important because their claim to whiteness was incredibly tenuous: working-class, immigrant backgrounds and non-Anglo Saxon, Protestant heritages made them targets of discrimination. assimilation meant aligning oneself specifically with WASP culture, which included an entrepreneurial spirit.

of course, they weren't the originators of Black exploitation: Morrison discusses how some talented enslaved people were forced to become prodigious musicians, either to provide free entertainment for their masters or as a concession for the enslaved population to engage in limited leisure time (also a kind of power-fantasy for slave owners--what Saidiya Hartman calls the "terror and fascination" of slavery). these fiddlers, banjo and brass players, and percussionists would have learned Western classical tunes as well as some of the popular songs adapted from Irish, Scottish, and British cultures. some aspects of those musics might have felt familiar to traditional African folk musics, or else musicians just mixed tracks for fun, but those influences all ended up in the blues as we know it, and the blues hit its peak of popularity in the 1920s-30s *because* of the Great Migration.

very few Black blues artists were materially *successful,* even if they were incredibly influential, because most labels at the time contracted Black musicians while the (white) producers retained the rights to the recorded music, meaning that the Black musicians got a one-time payment and nothing else, even if the record sold thousands of copies. producers attained social and financial capital via the exploited labor of Black people.

when Remmick led his newly turned posse in an Irish song, i thought of the plantation masters who forced the enslaved to perform their music on the threat of violence. when he said that the goal is eternal "fellowship," i thought of the Christians who forcibly converted Natives and displaced Africans, outlawing the hoodoo and other ritual and spiritual practices that nonetheless sustained many nonwhite people through systemic dehumanization and genocide.

it really frustrates me to think about how people are inevitably going to take Remmick’s one (1) singular statement about how much he resents the way the Irish were colonized and forcibly converted to Christianity and use it as fuel for “actually he had a point” and “he was right actually” and “he’s not really the villain here” posts, when the whole point is that Remmick is, through the vampiric hive mind he’s creating, forcibly assimilating people into yet another manipulative and parasitical system. he doesn't value the cultures of the people he assimilates—notice how all the vampires he turns dance to his culture's music using his culture's dances, and how he only uses the languages or knowledge other vampires have to offer when he needs to manipulate someone. Remmick is extremely transparent about the way he sees the people he turns as resources to exploit.

he’s perpetuating a cycle that he claims to hate and resent, and I think the movie is pretty damn clear about the fact that he doesn’t see anybody as valuable or useful to him except as prey and as pawns—otherwise he would just, you know, focus solely on people who actually consent to being turned. but he looked sad in that one scene and he’s an apparently attractive white cis man so people are gonna bend over backwards justifying all the harm he did.

[yukioos]

Competitive bakugo over a nonchalant y/n😏😏😏😏

competitive katsuki trying to win over nonchalant reader

everyone knew bakugo was competitive, always trying his best and fighting the hardest, no matter who he was against or what situation he was in. he always gave it his all. however, he thought he could do nearly everything on his own, he was incredibly independent, even hating it when people tried to help him with something, not wanting others to see him as weak.

but he did what he had done since middle school; put other people down to make himself feel better. unfortunately, you and midoriya were victims of it, but the two of you had very different reactions.

midoriya was always nervous to stand up for himself until a few months ago, when he became more confident in his abilities, which you applauded him for. bakugo, on the other hand, also made fun of you for god knows what. it was never for a specific reason, just picking on you because he didn’t know how to deal with his feelings for you.

but he was always frustrated with how you’d react. normally, after he would laugh and point a finger at you, you would just shrug and walk over to your friend, talking to them with an emotionless tone. he’d follow you, yell at you, just for you to do it all over again. he hated how you didn’t react in any sort of way.

so when the two of you sparred, and he won a match, he would yell and brag about it, calling you a sore loser and smirking in your face. you responded, looking at a nearby wall for a second, “good job, i guess.”

he frowned, “you guess? what the hell do you mean ‘i guess?’ you lost fair and square, y/n!”

you hummed and shrugged, causing him to march up to you with a scowl. he asked, “why do you always act so damn calm? cry or smile or feel emotions for once! you’re acting like icy hot!”

“i do feel emotions, bakugo, i just don’t show them that well. you should learn from me and be calmer, it especially helps in fights.” you almost smirked at the end, teasing him.

he grumbled, “teach me then.”

you raised your eyebrow and hesitantly asked, “really?” you didn’t believe him, assuming it was a trick.

“yes, dumbass. and call me katsuki or whatever, i don’t care.”

“seems like you do care if you’re correcting me.” you retorted, tilting your head and looking up at him.

the tips of his ears pinkened, and his face felt warmer than usual. he grumbled, “shut the hell up,” and used a small explosion near your feet, causing the ground to rumble underneath you.

of course, katsuki didn’t realize his reactions were very readable, and how dark his cheeks became once you teased him.

hope you liked this, it was fun to write!

[terriblepersongreatseamonster]

I adore Lady Gyokuyou & as much fun as I have thinking about how she is the #1 Jinmao shipper, it also makes me incredibly sad. She's so sweet & gentle. In the episode about Lady Fuyou, Gyokuyou mentions to Maomao that she's jealous. This poor girl is barely older than Maomao & she knows she's not going to get a happily ever after like Fuyou. Her "love story" is just politics She is a political pawn. She knows that the Emperor's favor can disappear at a moment's notice. She loves her children, that's obvious. But the whole getting swept off her feet by a man who's madly, passionately, raise an entire army to rescue you in love is not going to be in the cards for her. And she could be so bitter, angry, and jealous that Maomao has that (and seemingly doesn't realize it), but she isn't. She's in both Maomao & Jinshi's corners & just wants them to be happy.

[silenceofserenity]

Haikyuu Boys as your Boyfriend.

PART 1 ⋆✴︎˚｡⋆

↳ Includes: Kuroo, Kenma, Akaashi, Bokuto, Tsukishima & Terushima

Part 2, Part 3

⋆✴︎˚｡⋆

Kuroo Tetsurou

Dating Kuroo means pillows don't exist anymore - he loves resting his head on your thighs instead.

He loves challenging you with trivia competitions but he picks out questions only he knows, so he can brag to you about how smart he is.

I doubt this man knows how to cook and is probably the type to say, "but baby, the way you make it is just so much better!"

On that note, he's a food stealer. If you go and make yourself something to eat, just know he's taking portions when you're not looking.

He'll randomly text you science facts as a way to start the conversation, "hey, did you know that there are more trees on Earth than stars in the galaxy? anyways, I miss you."

His lockscreen is the ugliest photo of you just to annoy you, but he has a hidden photo album with all of your pretty photos named 'my girl/my boy/my partner'.

Wears your hair ties on his wrist 100%.

He's incredibly proud of his body and will take any chance to flex his biceps in front of you.

He'll text you, "please don't be mad" and then follow it up with a photo of his cat next to a broken plate because he swears you can't get mad at a cat.

Grabs your chin when you're distracted just to kiss you and whisper, "focus" in the most smug tone.

Tries so hard to be nonchalant but there is not a single nonchalant bone in his body.

Kozume Kenma

When he's gaming, he will let you lie on his lap and will instinctively play with your hair.

He lets you paint his nails when you're bored, acting like he doesn't care but he actually think its adorable.

Most of your dates consist being at his house or in a quieter setting like a little cafe.

After training, he'll come to you and rant about his teammates, "Yamamoto spiked it so hard he hit Kuroo in the face and no one laughed. I was the only one that laughed. Also, I tripped on a ball and Kuroo said it was karma, can you believe that?"

Loves cuddling with you - whenever you're over he becomes extremely clingy.

If he's gaming and you fall asleep beside him, he'll lower the volume, slide a blanket over you and keep glancing at you in admiration.

He's not the jealous type, but if he sees someone flirting with you he will make fun of them after they leave, "did he really just offer you (food you hate)? Idiot. I know you hate that."

Mario Kart competitions - that's all.

He has really specific spotify playlists for every scenario and has an extremely long one that's like 52 hours of songs you like for when you come over.

He hates PDA but when he gets overstimulated in public, he likes to hold pinkies or something small like that just to get your attention.

Expect random texts from him at any given time - like one at 2am in the morning asking to hop on minecraft.

Akaashi Keiji

I already know this man know how to cook a good meal so you better be ready for the best dish ever.

He's extremely observant and loves watching you speak, so he notices everything - a new habit, a subtle frown or even a slight change in tone of voice.

He loves reading in his spare time, and once he read one of your favourite books, annotated it, and gave it back to you with neat sticky notes saying, 'this part reminds me of you.'

On his phone, all of his notifications are off, except for you (and bokuto) but your name is starred and pinned at the top, always.

When he's annoyed or frustrated, he'll text you saying, 'can I call you? I need to hear your voice.'

After a rough day, he will show up at your house with your favourite snacks, a blanket, and your favourite movies to watch together.

He's the most grounding person, and always knows exactly what to say without sugarcoating it, 'you're capable. You're smart. And you don't need to prove it to anyone to be valid.'

Big believer in forehead kisses!

He lets you read over his shoulder, even if he's deep into schoolwork. If your head rests against his, he doesn't flinch. Just smiles a little.

He's memorised your schedule so he knows when to text you 'good luck' when you have that one evil teacher.

When you're crying, he doesn't panic. He just pulls you into him, rubs your back and mutters, "it's okay, my love. I've got you."

He loves listening to you rant while his fingers just softly trace all over your skin, humming at certain things you say to let you know he's still listening.

Bokuto Kotaro

Bro is literally your biggest fan. You could sneeze and this man would be looking at you in awe.

He absolutely adores it when you wear his jerseys to his games, he'd shout, "LOOK THAT'S MY BABY!!" in public. Especially in public.

Clings to you post-practice - arms wrapped around your waist, forehead resting on your shoulder as he whines about being sore and hungry.

Has NO poker face. If he's happy, you'll know. If he's sad, you'll know. He's also so dramatic when he's upset, "so this is how I die. Heart shattered, and all alone."

He will talk about you to anyone that will listen. Poor Akaashi is actually a victim of this.

This one time when he was in one of his sad moods, you were sitting with him in silence, and letting him rant when he suddenly looked up at you and said, "thank you for being patient with me."

He sends voice messages instead of texts because he claims texts don't show enough emotion but he always gets distracted when sending them and talks through 5 topics before getting to the point.

Random bear hugs. All the time. He loves hugging you, he says you're his safe space.

Probably sleep talks - like you'll wake up to him murmuring, "that's my baby, don't touch them or i'll fight you." He also wouldn't remember it in the morning.

He needs reassurance, but sometimes it's for the most random things. This one time he asked you if you still thought he was cool...

He's definitely got the most chaotic and weird food combinations that he tries to make you eat, "It might look gross but it's made with love, so just try it!"

Tsukishima Kei

Acts like he's not paying attention when you're ranting, but actually remembers every single detail.

If anyone ever says anything to you, he'll defend you but then deny it right after with that stupid smirk on his face, "no, that wasn't defending. I just hate stupid people."

When you're overwhelmed, he won't pressure you to talk - he'll just sit beside you and let you tell him when you're ready.

He definitely follows those dinosaur pages so he can get all the new updates on 'how dinosaurs really looked back in the day.'

Gossiping sessions with him go so hard because he has no filter and will literally say it as it is, "did she actually say that? Jesus, I'm surprised her boyfriend hasn't broken up with her yet."

He let you wear his glasses once, and he made it your contact picture. He claims it's because 'you look stupid' but we all know he loves it.

Pretends he hates PDA but he secretly likes it. You held his arm while walking together once and he called you clingy, yet didn't do anything to stop it.

He's weirdly competitive about game nights and if you beat him in Uno or Mario Kart, he'll go quiet for a bit before saying, "one more. That didn't count."

The only person he will help study is you. Hinata asked him once, and he said no straight up, but as soon as you asked he told you to meet him after school (Hinata has never lived this down).

He always makes height jokes and if you say something he thinks is stupid, he'll look down and say, "what was that? I can't hear you from down there."

He sends you random memes and just adds a comment like, "this is you."

Terushima Yuji

He's the type to compliment you in the middle of an argument to throw you off, "you're so hot when you're mad, you know that?"

Loves post-practice cuddles where he'll literally wrestle you into a hug and then just collapse with his head on top of your stomach.

He always talks through movies like he actually cannot stop talking. "wait, babe was that guy the killer? I though-" "shut up." "Okay, my bad."

His love language is physical touch and always needs to be in some form of contact with you - arm around your waist while walking, head in your lap when watching a movie, legs thrown over you when cuddling.

He's an incredibly unhinged texter and sends the most random messages: "opinions on matching tattoos?" "If you were a zombie, I'd let you eat me." "Look at this dog I saw today, we should get one. Or maybe a baby?"

Carries snacks for you and pretends it's not on purpose. He'll whip out one and be like, "oh you're hungry? Lucky I packed an extra bar. Total coincidence, I know."

If you attend his training, he will get totally distracted by you. You'll be in the stand watching as he turns to look at you, winking just in time for the ball to smack him right in the face.

Honestly, he's quite a messy person, and probably has clothes all over the floor in his room but he uses it as an excuse for you to wear them. "I left them out on purpose for you obviously!"

Gets pouty if you don't kiss him before he leaves, "oh okay... guess i'll just die then."

[hephslacker]

Your post was incredibly fun and interesting to read and I couldn't help but want to point out some of my own observations and share some thoughts!

You have discussed how Ena’s sides represent her “individuality” and here’s another little thing I have noticed!

> In the game, Salesman actually says NOTHING regarding her opinion towards her job, staying “professionally-playful”, yet distant.

What I think is also a point of interest is that a few of the jobs Ena has collected didn’t promise her ANYTHING in return, basically making her work for free. And while helping Taxi Driver’s Heads might have been justified as "helping a fellow worker”, what about Hoarder Alex? The guy, at most, said that he MIGHT give us his thanks, but that’s about it. And yet Ena still accepts the job.

And we HAVE seen how Ena reacted when she thought that The Witches weren’t gonna pay.

The only explanation I can think of so far is that she was willing to let it slide due to the fact that she NEEDED to pass through the bridge, which made said task a priority.

> Just an interesting interaction I have noticed, especially if we take into account that this is Ena’s inner thoughts

> Another thing I wanted to talk about was the apparent “violent streak” you have briefly mentioned.

Technically speaking, “aiming for the target” could be taken metaphorically, aka cementing Ena’s main task as dealing with the Boss. What kind of “dealing” is being talked about remains to be seen!

> That brings us to another interesting point and a bit of a theme that I have noticed being subtly repeated throughout the game: miscommunication.

The most notable example of that would be the confusion that Genie and Bathroom cause, however I want to focus on what I think might be the most important miscommunication in the game, aka the one between Ena and Froggy.

What if we, and Ena, have misunderstood the task that was given? Considering that in this particular case Froggy was actually trying to use a fixed expression from a different language, it is quite probable that he might have caused confusion by what exactly he meant by “aiming for the Boss’s gut”. Do we have to kill him? Peacefully deal with him? Get rid of him? “Dethrone” him? Who knows!

> Another interesting thing is the Boss himself. What I have noticed is that… we actually have no idea if he’s been born, no?

After what the Receptionist tells us (You are too late! The Boss isn’t even born yet) I have realised that Froggy, while heavily implied, never did really SAY that the Boss has been born, no? For all we know he might be born SOON, but not yet.

It also aligns with the fact that both Froggy and The Receptionist mention us being “late”.

However, that’s just a speculation.

But who is the Boss? What does he do?

> Regarding Ena’s apparent Sin, it honestly feels like it’s not this specific Ena, but ENAs in general that are unforgivable. Honestly? It’s very hard to even start guessing what may be the reason, but I do have a few theories.

The first thing I have noticed is this particular sentence

I’m not doing what you SAY I’m doing

This most likely hints at some huge misunderstanding that has taken place.

If you think about it, misunderstandings are also quite a common theme in ENA DREAM BBQ. Just take the ending for example! Or when Ena goes to the Purge Event, during which Froggy assumes she’s partying and is having a good time.

Another theory I have is that Ena might be, quite literally, being punished for the sins of others, as has been hinted in the dialogue with Taski Maiden.

Maybe she’s unforgivable because she’s a “vessel” for the sins of other beings, hence her being unable to be “sin-free” herself.

Frankly, for all we know she might have been simply at the wrong place at the wrong time.

But of course, it’s impossible to say for sure, although some sort of misunderstanding playing a role might be quite a possibility.

Honestly tho, Ena’s overworking tendencies and disregard for herself is honestly quite saddening:(

Wonder if it’s due to the feelings of guilt or regret? And if so, are they misplaced?

Could it be that it’s impossible to forgive Ena because she can’t forgive herself?

Have you noticed how she doesn’t seem to be all that concerned by the idea of being unforgivable?

But, well, all of this is nothing more than a speculation at the moment.

DREAM BBQ

What if the whole game is Ena's subconscious?

I'm sure that most have already heard of such a theory, but what if everything (or mostly everything) is nothing more than a dream, in which case this may open a whole other bug of worms.

However, what I want to focus on are Ena's view of herself, because if the world itself is a dream, in whatever way of form, then it means that what we have seen regarding Ena would be completely Ena's own view and opinion of herself. That, in turn, would mean that her "unforgivable" state would be entirely her "fault" too.

Could it be that she did something she deeply regrets? Does she blame herself for something out of her control, or is she actually responsible for committing something terrible?

The idea of other ENAs existing, in this context, has left me thinking that, what if they actually are the "species" that represent certain people? With the hints to war and Ena's connection to the military, could they represent different participants, including those who might have simply been affected by such events, or are they only the people who have actively been participating?

Well, all of that remains to be seen.

I’m not sure if I have missed anything because it’s quite hard to keep track of everything but yeah!

Ena in Dream BBQ and Work Culture

HELLO Dashboard!! Ever since i first played DBBQ i've found the entire game endlessly interesting (as have most people, LOL) But one of the most interesting, and in my opinion, most Potent things, is Ena's character and how she relates to the game's commentary on modern work culture.

So for anyone as much of a #SICKO as me 😭 Here's an embarrassingly long analysis of just that! There's SO much to talk about with this game, and even when I'm trying to focus on one specific idea with this post, I'm sure I'll still miss things, so just stick with me best you can OK? 😭 😭

My aim for this post is to allow you to understand Just how deep in the torment nexus Ena is, and to want to say "she should be at the club" Only to realize she can't even go to the club. She can't even go to the club. Because of Job. (Among other, hopefully more intelligently articulated things!)

SO, Let's just jump right in :D

First, to state the obvious—Ena's literal entire life is her job. The only moods she expresses under normal circumstance are "smooth talking salesperson where every line is about working or trying to sell something" and "Stops keeping up the veneer and gets frustrated and pissed because she hates her stupid job."

This permeates every aspect of her character—I don't think there's a single line in the game so far where she says like, Anything about herself. There's nothing about what she may want or what she may like. It's all about her fuckass job or the fuckass Boss.

And of course, even in gameplay aspects, you literally don't get a chance to choose whether you accept a job or not, like the thought of doing anything besides giving her time and energy for other people or her job's benefit doesn't even occur to her (Or, it can't occur to her—I doubt the Boss would want to allow her reprieve from anything at all, and I'm sure Ena would know this).

(^ Ena's reaction to being told to find a mythical figure that she maybe didn't even know existed cause Froggy sure as hell didn't to do a stupid job for Froggy's stupid ass. Like)

Maybe i'm reaching here, but I even find it interesting how her red hand has no fingers (besides a thumb). I feel like that represents a lack of individuality she has when she's in Salesperson mode, or at least, a lack of individuality she's been allowed. A lack of having a defined being cause it's all about this stupid job.

There's lots of avenues to go from here, but let's start with another big point of the game: Everybody hates her. Except for like, three characters, every NPC in the game either insults her, talks down to her, blatantly doesn't respect her, or Literally tells her nobody should be punished for being born except her. Typical day for Ena.

I'm not going to get into why I think this is—for me there's not enough evidence to speculate with surety right now—but I think this does tie strongly into her commitment to her job. Ena working her ass off in every aspect of her life and earning nothing but disrespect for it is very reminiscent of real life work environments.

Think of how almost every NPC claims they are "the Boss" in such a way that many of them seem to want to be the Boss, like he's some kind of well-known or respected figure. The description for the game on Steam even says as much: "Play as ENA as she searches for the Boss that everyone wants to be."

(eg: "I am the B-O-S-S!"):

People wish they were the Boss, they want to be some kind of rich capitalist with power and fame, but when looking at someone who actually works for him, and probably is the reason the Boss has profit and success in the first place, they insult her and demean her no matter how much she gives herself to them and the Boss. I'm sure you can see the real life parallels here.

It's even possible one of the reasons Ena works so hard in the first place is as an attempt to earn respect from these people, or to make up for whatever everyone thinks she did that made everyone hate her so much. Especially considering...

Our society is one that tells its people that Work is unequivocally Good. Committing yourself to work is what everyone, no matter who they are or what they face, is what you have to do to be a valuable member of society, and to have any respect from other people in the slightest. It tells its people that you only have value as a living human being at all if you give your life to work.

Even though this blatantly isn't true. If people think you're the Wrong type of worker, or if people think your work isn't valuable, helpful, or that it doesn't require skill, you can work as hard as you want but you'll still be treated like shit. But, hey, work is still your duty as a member of society, right? Stop bitching and whining and pull yourself up by your bootstraps, right?

Needless to say, it's easy to see how this whole idea is being represented in DBBQ. She even knows how much she's sold herself to this, she just... Seems to have extremely casually accepted it all LOL, which, I mean... What else does she have the power to do?

This very casual and nonchalant acknowledgement of her lack of autonomy connects to another big point: Ena doesn't value herself, nor does she even know how to exist without being in a constant state of working.

Let's talk about the Purge: There's a LOT to get to here in terms of Ena herself LOL, but the intrigue starts before she even enters the party. Literally Froggy just saying she's about to enter an "Event" stops her in her tracks and worries her. Not to mention the next line...

This feels like an indication that despite how much she commits herself to it, Ena does "crave freedom" from her shitty job, although she can scarcely admit this anywhere else so far. Then, if you talk to this slime guy, you get some strange text.

As far as I know, the text for interacting with things doesn't look like this anywhere else in the game. And given that it looks exactly the same as how Ena's lines do in the Purge, it's seemingly the only peek we get into her internal monologue, and it is. Quite worrying! She literally can climb up a hellish freezing floating mountain and yet this is by far the most freaked out she gets in the entire game.

And then to actually get into the Purge, an Evil eye Ball tells her that she needs to give a literal arm or a leg to get in. And she just does it. Like no hesitation no further questions she just gives it away to the evil eye ball. Presumably for Good? Because the only reason she regains the arm later is because of Genie magic? Like Ena. Girl. Are we gonna talk about this at all.

But so many real life work environments expect you to give every part of yourself in order to be allowed to exist and live in society, including your physical being and critical parts of your personhood at all.

(Let me also say I find it intentional that she gave away her white arm. Whereas her red hand literally doesn't have fingers, the sharp claws she has on her white hand represent the individuality and unique identity she Does have. However, it's also the part of herself that's in conflict with her ability to be a Good Worker, that always does exactly what she's supposed to do, and never complains, and never gets in the way of her duties.)

She was already very distressed here, but it's a clear indication of how little she values herself. It was a motion to lose a part of herself just to reach the Genie, both for her stupid job, and possibly for the possibility of "freedom" from it all. And your average job these days—no matter how important you are to your cause—will drill it into you that your ability to be a good worker is infinitely more important than your existence as a person. It's easy to see how Ena may have internalized that.

And then she goes to the club one time and this happens

I won't get too deep into her dialogue with the NPCs here because I think their intention is pretty clear; Being in a place so antithetical to a work environment, and a place where she's supposed to let loose and have fun, is so distressing and impossible to even fathom for her that This Happens.

(see: "H-How can I leave this stupid event? M-my lame schedule is full,")

Like, everything at the Purge is insane, but this is a particularly heartbreaking line for me. One because of her job's shitty environment that's broken her down so much—do you think she EVER gets a break, because I sure don't—but also because of how it's conditioned her to not even believe she can "afford another minute of joy." Ena :[

Note how she's covered in these branches that started growing during Froggy's phone call, which look very similar to how she looks in this gag with the Shaman—it's literally her nervous system. In her scene with Mitu she even says she's feeling "sick," She's literally freaked out of her flipping Gourd with her goddamn Nerves On The Outside

Hell, even though Meanie's speaking (which, I mean, no shit, in another line she literally describes her job as "deplorable" 😭), these sprites in the files are actually labelled "Anxiety", suggesting that she's SO freaked out by being somewhere supposed to be so opposite to her work she's become another variant of herself, a la Drunk Ena from Season 1.

I won't get much more into this, because @cube-cumb3r has a PHENOMENAL post I'll link in the notes that goes deeper into this stuff from the Purge and the "Anxiety" thing, And also gets more into theory territory than I do here! Please please go read that post, it is so damn good.

In any case, I think the scenes with the Purge NPCs are the biggest examples in the whole game of how much she hates her fuckass job, yet she can't be allowed to be anything besides a wage slave to it. And just as she's internalized everybody in her world's dislike of her, she hates herself for it.

So:

We've established that Ena's shitty job parallels the real life work conditions that plague our world, and that these conditions have caused her to devalue herself and believe she can't have any reprieve from them... but, what even is her job?

Apparently she's a salesperson, but what is she even selling? She tries to offer a "divestment opportunity", and tells the Witches she can show them how to "grow [their] own [boss]" which definitely falls in line with the Sales thing, but besides that it's still not clear, even when she talks to Froggy.

I suppose the "grow their own boss" line does sound a lot like the phrasing used in MLM schemes, with how they lure people in by telling them they can "be their own boss." The Receptionist also calls Ena a scammer and a conman, so maybe she is a sort of scammer, but, I also don't exactly think the Receptionist think she has the most reliable opinions of Ena LOL

She also calls her a "pink-collar slug", pink collar meaning a job traditionally associated with women, which. ??? I don't fully know where to go with that.. like ...Nothing she does harkens to... Any kind of job expected to be done by women, imo?? Um. Yeah idk i just thought that may be significant??/ 😭😭😭😭 Listen man I can't know it all

Anyway. Maybe I'll be proven embarrassingly wrong when we receive more information in future chapters, but I think the lack of clarity on what she's supposed to be is representative of the games themes. The constant disrespect Ena receives makes her seem likely to be a low-tier worker, someone at the bottom of the ladder that people have no problems walking all over.

Because these types of jobs will treat you the same no matter who you are or what you're supposed to be doing. She's doing what the world tells her she needs to do in order to be a respected member of society, and yet she's also someone people feel comfortable treating poorly because she's at the bottom—because has no power of her own. It doesn't matter what she's supposed to be doing, it matters that she's the Wrong type of worker.

And how is she supposed to ever say anything for herself? It seems virtually baked into her Salesperson side to completely ignore past all the rude things these assholes say to her. After all, not only would that probably just make most people ruder to her (and impede her ability to complete jobs for them) isn't the customer always right?

...OK I will say her whole "Understood! Aim for the target!" line DOES seem like her overall job here is to fucking kill the Boss, but this is long enough already and the likely theme of Ena having a violent streak and whatnot is another beast entirely that I am NOT getting into here 😭😭

Besides, maybe she has no clearly defined job because we've already seen exactly what it is. To sell her life, time, and emotions to whatever all these clowns ask of her, and to receive no reward besides another goddamn job to do.

I think future chapters may delve more into Ena's true feelings on her situation, and possibly even how she'll get freedom from it. Allow me to mention the scenes with Theodora, wherein if you try to "aspire to receive a blissful life" Theodora just tells Ena "You can't aspire for more than what you are capable of." (LIKE OKAYYYY.... RUDE MUCH????)

Until, finally:

How is her mind—containing a desire for freedom—supposed to be in harmony with the letters it spits out, when she's been so conditioned that the only thing she's allowed to be is a worker?

Now, even I still have a lot of questions after this. Like: What has happened in Ena's past that made her this way? How and why did she take this job in the first place? What is up with the "Guys wait, I'm not doing what you say I'm doing" scene I literally didn't even mention that once here. Why should nobody be punished for being born except poor damn Ena, and does it relate to any of the themes I just talked about?

I... don't know. Like I actually truly have no idea. But I have confidence, even if it's in a delightfully vague and abstract Ena-typical way, that we'll find out eventually.

[ghelullu]

I have tried to sort my thoughts about Skeletá and mostly failed, but still wanted to talk about it because it’s such an interesting little big album already after only a handful of listens

tl;dr: I like it alot, it has some certified bangers on it, some songs didn’t fully land for me personally, I love the variety and his voice is amazing.

I think what stood out to me the most – apart from the very obvious and super cool 80s vibe going on (80s lovers WIN) – is the sheer variety of songs on it and how most of them did not sound the way I expected them to sound at all: Cenotaph was so much groovier and uplifting than I thought (looking back and knowing it’s about his brother, I feel like I should’ve seen that coming), De Profundis Borealis is less heavy than I thought (and hoped; insert the "I know it's not a black metal song" clip), Marks of the Evil one is just so much etc! And I do mean this as an absolute positive in a time where most successful music does not surprise us often anymore.

I totally applaud and respect him for not doing the easy thing: Making an album that follows directly down Impera’s path sound wise – that would have been safe, considering the commercial and critical success it had. Instead he took some of Impera’s (and Phantomime’s) sound, threw in some things from the old albums and a ton of stuff out of his Very Normal brilliant brain to mix something… well. Different.

It is not an album aimed to please people, it’s not targeted at his „old“ fans, not at his new fans from the last album, not at critics or whatever; it’s not a people pleaser album, in my opinion (I’ve seen people say it’s too „commercial“, gotta disagree; I think they just heard it's more „pop", not understanding how 80s Rock worked), but rather Tobias doing what *he* thinks fits, what he thinks needs to be done, what he thinks would be cool, interesting, fun.

While doing that he’s once again not afraid of things that are bordering on too cringe, too corny, too whatever. We’ve all seen that one Reddit review of Missilia Amori – but one thing about his music I really respect is how he can take stuff that wouldn’t work with other artists, would be painfully cringe, and make it work. Because with him it is (and comes across as such) intentional and well handled, often with a wink; he’s been doing that literally from the beginning, because he, unlike some people on Reddit, is capable of not taking himself and things *so* fucking seriously all the time.

He knows that things, art, music, yes, even Big Serious Metal, can just be fucking FUN. (Plus, have these people never listened to any bit of 80s Rock? Like, really?)

And there is so much going on in this album. Lyrics wise, yes, some absolute gold (the 3rd rider "looking cool" absolutely took me out, though), I won’t even touch on that here, because I haven’t studied them enough. But every song is very different: Different vibe, different themes, different *things* that make them stand out (something I LOVE about his music is how every song has at least 1-2 thingies, special, interesting melodies, intrument bits, vocal moments, whatever, that just scratch the brain right and make you come back again and again).

While there are many callbacks to his previous works (and obviously even way more to other artists; it's once again a loveletter of his to his favourite artists growing up), in my opinion it’s also the least „typical Ghost“ album to date; in a way it’s more a Tobias album, which is fine to me, and fitting, considering how incredibly personal it is – and a fun coincidence with the other Tobias album, Passiflora, having finally blessed our ears earlier this year. I think there are surprisingly many similarities? Obviously he has developed all of his skills enormously since, but… It was fun listening to both of these very personal albums back to back, highly recommended.

Lots of high praise, is it my new fave? It doesn’t beat Prequelle, my #1, at this moment in time, and I don’t think it will, even after multiple listens. It’s an album that definitely requires being listened to at least a dozen times. Many songs on it – on Tobias’ work in general – are absolutely required to be listened to multiple times before you can fully appreciate and connect with it (which is, i may add, a GOOD thing. He puts in so much stuff to discover!).

First of all, for me the ballads didn’t land. And this is mostly a personal preference, I am not a ballads person, they rarely hit for me (Life Eternal taking me out almost immediately was an outlier and to this day the Helvetesfönster – Life Eternal combo is the only music that ever made me bawl my eyes out). Both Guiding Lights (his vocals are so, so good) and Excelsis are objectively fantastic songs and I understand why people love them so much, but especially Excelsis is musically just a bit too much...I don’t have the right word...; the end however is wonderful (and circles nicely back to Life Eternal (and also Respite!))

I would have very, very, VERY much preferred a heavy song instead of one of these two. A Faith, a Mummy Dust, a Twenties, you know, some growls? The heavy riff in Lachryma gave me hope there’d be more in another song, but it’s fine, it’s his baby! I expected De Profundis to be the heavier song, but it turned out softer than i thought, but it’s still super fun and I think it will do a bit of a Watcher in the Sky, where it’s cool on the album and then FUCK live!

Speaking of live, many of these songs will shine live, as the 4 already played prove. The vocals on the album – SO good, so much variety! Sometimes he sounds like Ozzy, sometimes like Phil Collins, sometimes very Phantomime, the high notes but also more lower register, bless him (that was one of my big wishes), just great! – show that he’s experimented with his voice (despite talking shit about it all the time) a lot and that he has much more trust into his abilities to perform them live (with the reduced mask; and he’s already proven that; I cannot stress enough how incredible he sounds live now).

The instrumentals are fantastic, such nice guitar solos, the synths, the keyboard-guitar sex in Umbra is just 👌🏽, but really, they shine in all songs. And you cannot forget the Cowbell, bless him.

My favourite is Lachryma with the heavy guitars and the catchy pop-y chorus, followed by Peacefield (esp live) and Umbra; honorable mention Marks of the Evil one and Missilia Amori, and De Profundis

There is so much to love about this album; how personal it is for him, how much it feels like a big hug (and punch in the gut, followed by another hug tbh and of course some horny) from him to the world. How much growth both as a singer, instrumentalist, producer etc but also in his...presentation of himself and his art he has shown.

He doesn’t hide behind a full latex mask on stage anymore, but he also doesn’t hide his messages behind a mask of 3 layers of satanic lyrics anymore.

It’s in every way such a vulnerable, wonderful work and I’m very grateful he shared this with us

[becausebuckley]

michelle's buddie fic recs: week 17!

we're another week closer to buddie canon, i feel it in my bones <3

please take a look at both the fic ratings and the tags before reading! some of these contain spoilers for season 8. if you come across something you like in this list, remember to show some love to the author by leaving kudos and a comment!

all that you ever wanted from me | stevesconverse | 7.8k | T

the one where Eddie takes care of Buck when he's being plagued by a bad migraine. i'm such a sucker for fics like this <3 seeing these two take care of each other is just so, so good, and this is the loveliest example of that!!

flash mobs and jumbotron proposals | glorious_spoon/@glorious-spoon | 10.2k | E

Buck asks a question. Eddie dithers. this has such wonderful eddie characterisation!! i loved his thought process and also the conversation with bobby <3

it only hurts this much right now | daffodilsonaprettystring/@daffodilsonaprettystring | 7.1k | GA

Buck wakes up with a headache, but goes into work anyways despite the pain. Eddie is not pleased with this. But it's fine, Buck has done this before, he can do it again... right? such a wonderful fic!! i love the conversation buck has with eddie here <3

king of the castle | organyx | 12.5k | E

Buck and Eddie challenge each other to see who can go the longest without an orgasm. Eddie’s pretty confident he can win. this is hot and silly and freaky and has the absolute best buddie banter. so good!!

saddle up and ride | lecornergirl/@clusterbuck | 2.7k | E

He looks up at Buck, positioned above him like this, and he knows exactly what he wants. “Ride me,” he says, and only realises how authoritative it came out when Buck’s eyes widen. “I mean—if you—” JOINT. ACCOUNT. you will get this when you read it. just. JOINT. ACCOUNT. incredible fic <3

stress relief | greenbergsays/@greenbergsays | 5.6k | E

Set in the aftermath of the sniper shooting. Eddie is feeling frustrated and Buck offers a helping hand. hot and soft and just so very beautiful <3 what a vision of a fic!!

sweetness follows | pairofraggedclaws/@pairofraggedclaws | 4.3k | T

Buck and Eddie figure it out, through the eyes of Chimney, Hen, and Bobby. i love a good multipe pov fic and also i love the firefam and also i love buddie so basically this fic is perfect for me <3

want to feel you when i'm falling in love | smilingbuckley/@smilingbuckley | 1k | GA

Buck keeps getting cold at night and struggles falling asleep. Eddie cuddles him about it. listen i am a simple person, okay? i see the tag cuddling and snuggling, i see that the fic is written by an author whose work i love, i click the link and devour the fic like it's the first glass of water i've had in days. this is so very lovely <3

what a view | maybeamystery/@frysquint | 3.1k | GA

They’re coming back from a late call for a shift that was supposed to end at two-thirty but didn’t, and Buck has been keeping a close eye on the time. He’s a busy guy with things to do and places to be. One minute he’s glancing at his phone for the two hundredth time in the last thirty minutes, and the next, the whole world goes blurry and out of focus. this was a reread! i love the dialogue here, it feels so true to character!

what makes you smile | EiraLloyd/@unlifeira | 5.6k | T

Three times Buck draws something that makes Eddie smile, and one time Eddie draws something that makes Buck smile. well, guess what? this entire fic made ME smile <3 it's just so fun and so lovely and so buddie and i love the drawings!!

where we belong | carpediaz/@sofa-king-lame | 34.8k | E

The one where Eddie outsources his hair washing post shooting, meets Buck, and learns to accept the good things in life. okay but where do i make an appointment with hairdresser buck. please let me make an appointment with hairdresser buck!! i love the writing here, the descriptions are lovely and the dialogue is brilliant and the domesticity of it all is just <3

you make the world taste better | farfromthstars/@doeeyeseddie | 11.8k | T

Newly arrived to LA, Eddie decides to take his son to parent/child cooking classes. The instructor is so much more than he expected. this was a reread of one of my favourites <3 i love chris here and his relationship with both buck and eddie, and the firefam presence is so lovely!! just such a gem!

you touched down in the base of my fears | fruitsdoesnotknow/@fruitsdontknow | 10.2k | T

the 118 attempt an escape room. Buck and Eddie attempt to be normal for sixty minutes. if you need some cheering up this week, i cannot recommend this fic enough <3 i love hen and ravi and bobby and the buddie of it all and it's just so, so good!!

[v0id-of-thought]

ok more rapid fire thoughts on The Well

Stop fucking cutting to Ten!!! this era is already up his ass, and he did have lot of episodes but if it isn't necessary to understand the plot (which it wasn't, and if you've seen Midnight you'll know) we shouldn't have to be reminded again that RTD is severely stuck in 2009. you get one and and you already used it five times over with 60th specials. This is not David Tennets show.

Belinda continues to be my favorite companion since Bill. I think it's perfect that just as she's starting to have fun, and fall for The Doctor she almost dies because of his negligence. HE wanted to see the entity and she got SHOT for it. I can't wait to see how their dynamic builds I hope they have a huge fight towards the end of the season. I just hope they don't make her forgive him so easily.

Rose aisling-ellis as Aliss Fenly was incredible, her desperation and frustration became my own; I was yelling at my screen for them to listen to her. The hologram subtitles were super cool, but even with cool scifi tech they were still selective with what parts of the conversation she was allowed in on. A very realistic example of how even with disability aids, ableists still choose to abuse their power. Also yet another reminder for me to get on with learning ASL.

[faramirsonofgondor]

Watching Over the Waynes

AU where somehow it comes out that Jason is alive and while Wayne Industries is trying to do damage control for the public, some intern has the great idea of doing a reality TV documentary series thing (sort of like a mix between Keeping Up With Kardashians and The Office) to address the controversy and also show what the Waynes are like as a family. Bruce agrees because he thinks he’s agreeing to a family interview. None of them are prepared for the whole documentary crew to arrive, and Bruce spends three hours on the phone with his publicist trying to get out of it while crew awkwardly eats the food Alfred had hurriedly whipped up for them. Eventually, Bruce gives up and thus starts the family torture bonding session.

The first few episodes are supposed to center around Jason, who is determined to share nothing because this entire ordeal is embarrassing stupid and he hates the press. He does a good job of scowling at the camera and maintaining his stoicism up until someone (cough cough Dick) says he looks like Bruce when he does that (off camera of course, since no one sees Brucie Wayne as the brooding father figure they all know him to be) and then Jason does a complete 180 and pulls out all the dramatics. He even sheds a few tears as he recounts his amnesia and how horribly traumatic it was, and about how it’s hard to remember life before his “accident” but he still does have a few memories he could share with them (and if those memories are conveniently all times where Dick did something incredibly embarrassing - well that’s not Jason’s fault, is it?) From there they move onto the other members of the family and their perspective of Jason’s situation, what it was like when he came back, etc.

Eventually, once they’ve covered everything about Jason, they start asking about their day-to-day lives, what they like to do for fun, and all that other jazz. They were expecting to hear about the business, their jobs, maybe some philanthropy, and to the family’s credit - they do discuss it. But what’s more than is the small but significant moments they catch on camera, like how someone starts to bring up a topic and then seemingly remembers that they’re being recorded, and shuts down the conversation entirely. Or times when they asked about the scuff marks on the ceiling, and all they got in response was a tired sigh from Alfred and the words “that would be Master Dick’s doing, I’m afraid” they crew did not ask for a follow up (they were afraid, too). Or the time they swore they saw Damian chase someone with a sword through the house, but when they checked the footage it was blank.

There are also the odd, quirky personality traits that the family seems to exhibit - but only within the privacy of their own home. Dick walks around doing acrobatics - up until he remembers that other people are there, to which he awkwardly stops, waves, and then retreats. Tim walks around the manor at all hours of the night and day, sometimes talking to thin air (?) and when they ask the other members of the family they just go “it’s the sleep deprivation” without any other context, Damian keeps a whole menagerie of pets in the manor, and somehow keeps getting more as time passes (the crew is too scared to ask where he gets them from - they still remember the sword incident even if there’s no evidence of it), and it seems like sometimes members of the family will just… disappear (???) at night in teams or groups. Like, the crew will search the whole manor (in a non-creepy, authorized way) and they’re just not there (???)

As each episode airs the public starts making up more and more conspiracies about what the Waynes get up to at night (they run an underground criminal empire, they’re all secretly a bunch of dwarves stacked together pretending to be people and need to recharge their energy at night, they’re vigilantes, they’re all secret graffiti artists trying to one-up each other, etc. etc.) Eventually one of the crew members is bold enough to ask them directly, (un)fortunately for the family, the person they asked was Dick, who panicked slightly and blurted out the first thing that came to mind, “we’re drag queens!”

The crew is, of course, skeptical of this answer. So Dick tries to save face by launching into a whole tangent about his drag persona. Dick’s persona is named Donna (he was panicking, okay!!). He has Tim photoshop his face onto photos of Donna to make it seem more believable (it does not work). The crew begins to question the other members of the family on their persona, and the only one who seems even slightly prepared to answer is Tim somehow (Tim did not explain to his family why he had women’s clothes and wigs - not that they asked, they were too busy panicking over trying to figure out their own personas). Steph decided that her drag king persona would be named Dick, much to everyone else’s amusement. She insisted it had nothing to do with Dick and that she just thought it was funny (despite opting to borrow Dick’s clothes for her performance). Cass was confused on the whole drag king/queen concept and followed Steph’s lead and dressed as Bruce. Jason, like Dick, panicked and said his persona was named Diana. Bruce, normally calm, was even more panicked because he was planning on claiming the name Diana and now he has to come up with something else (he decides on the name Lois).

Eventually the crew insists on accompanying them to whatever drag bar they go to in order to see them perform. Bruce and Jason start to sweat because while Dick and Tim might be able to do a passable performance, Jason and Bruce were tanks of men (did they even make dresses in their size ?). Somehow, they all manage to calm their nerves on the big night and get ready to perform, it’s all going well - Tim does a beautiful cover of “Lola” by The Kinks, Dicks flexibility and walk is fantastic, Steph does a hysterical Dick impersonation, Cass is… Cass, Jason’s acting skills are off the charts. Then comes Bruce’s turn, and just as he starts to get on stage, guess who shows up? The fucking Joker. Everyone starts panicking, and Bruce, who is not as coordinated as usual in his stripper platform heels, trips and sends one of his shoes flying. Straight into The Joker. The heel goes through his eye, killing him instantly. There’s a long silence, where nobody knows what to do, until someone in the crowd (Jason - though he’ll always deny it) starts chanting “Lois! Lois! Lois!” and eventually everyone joins in.

The episode airs and breaks streaming records. People beg the Waynes to visit Metropolis and do a reenactment of the whole ordeal - this time with Lex Luthor instead of the Joker. Lois Lane is one of those people. Clark pouts and says that he could do it, but Lois insists on her namesake doing it. Bruce just sighs and waits for the publicity to die down. It does not happen. The next JL meeting he attends he finds everyone dressed as his Lois persona, except for Diana who is very pointedly dressed as Jason.

Eventually he tries to do some more damage control by having an actual family interview about everything that happened. When the day comes, Bruce answers questions carefully insisting it was an accident. He dutifully ignores Lois Lane’s raised hand for the duration of the time (he can see the glee on her face and does not want to touch that with a ten foot pole). The other family members answer questions too, claiming that none of them would ever kill anyone on purpose. This statement holds less weight when, at the end of the interview conference, fucking Scarecrow shows up and Dick, in a panic, throws his microphone at him. The microphone goes through his eye, killing him instantly. The crowd goes wild. Everyone loves the Waynes.

[lilliezzzzz-fics]

Mario Karting

including: alex albon, yuki tsunoda, dino beganovic, lance stroll + isack hadjar author's note: blame my mario kart addiction for this <3 also finally writing for dino, which is great because i love him, but also means i have a chance to include swedish in my writing! hooray! reader is gn, no use of y/n <3 warnings: mentions of food (yuki). minor swedish dialogue (dino), i think that's it? just fluffy ! word count: 1.3k (200-ish each)

★ Alex Albon

he always—and i mean always plays yoshi

if anyone else tries to take him from him, he gives them the dirtiest glare

whenever he and you play against each other, somehow one of your pets always end up in the way

either sitting in his lap or yours, or maybe even sitting in front of the screen somehow

then, when he makes his kart he does speed > acceleration > grip > handling > weight

his favourite cup to play with you is the lightning cup

he gets to first and then gets red shelled like twice in a row and falls down the pack to like 7th

gets so, so stressed but he hides it well, just lets out a heavy sigh when the race is over

he's very competitive too―he probably uses all his items on you whenever you're in front of him

lets out such a laugh when you get mad at him

it's the funniest thing ever according to him

although, if you get above him he gets very happy because you seem very proud of yourself

probably complementing you with a smile on his face

but when you threaten to steal his seat at williams he takes it all back

“Mate, that's just not fair, now is it?” Alex exclaims, his hands gripping the controller.

“What happened?”

“I just got fucking red shelled twice!” He groans, “I swear, like, they're targeting me or something.”

You laugh at him, softly bumping his shoulder with yours, “maybe you're just bad.”

“Take that back!”

★ Yuki Tsunoda

i think he'd play like tanooki mario or baby mario

his karts always priorities speed over all else, less weight too―he probably doesn't have too much acceleration on them though

he loves the shell cup, he is actually godlike at moo moo meadows

and he is so incredibly competitive, like he starts kicking you whenever you get too close to his character―ending up in a semi-brawl against each other

he's surprisingly strategic too, like purposely falling back a little to get the bullet, then getting to the front with mushrooms and just dominating

takes it super seriously. it's his life on the line, actually

oh and he makes sure to have snacks for you two ready 

dried fruits, chocolate, chips―pretty much anything that you want, he has on the table

even homemade snacks if any of you are craving them

though he denies that he made it for you, for his pride, he insists

he actually screeches whenever he gets hit by a projectile, blabbering curses to whoever threw them

even at you

but in the end it's all just in good fun, he never actually gets mad nor do you

except when he throws a blue shell when you're in front, of course

then it's over for him

“Haha!” Yuki grins as he flies to the front with his items.

“How did you get that?!” You pout, eyes still locked on the screen, watching as he passes by you with a golden mushroom.

“Strategy, obviously. You're just not Mario Karting on my level.”

★ Dino Beganovic

he mains koopa troopa for no reason other than “he’s funny”

and his favourite cup is the egg cup, he just really likes dragon driftway

talking about drifting

he is actually incredible when it comes to drifting and doing tricks

he never misses a singular one, and you have zero clue how he does it

it’s like magic or something

but he also gets terrible luck when it comes to items, and he’s not particularly good with them either

the number of times he's either a) thrown a bomb and proceeded to drive into it, and b) thrown a green shell that just ends up hitting him couldn’t even be counted on two hands

not only that, but he fumbles or gets shelled so much

it’s kind of pitiful, like you feel so bad when you see his number just fall from 1 to 3, to 4, and even 6

and he doesn’t rage much, but when he does he rages in swedish

he does refrain from doing so majority of the time, but it is fun to witness

either way, when you do start to feel bad when he falls down the pack, it usually doesn’t stay that way long

somehow he always manages to climb back into top 3

it gets irritating sometimes, however, that never lasts because he just looks so pretty when he’s proud of himself

give him a little victory smooch for me, please <3

“Men asså! Din jävla—ugh, gud…” Dino groans as yet another shell flies into him, “Jag svär om det kommer en till-”

There’s a brief pause, and you can’t help but snicker at Dino’s dramaticism.

“Calm down, it’s not like it’s the end of the world.”

“But it is!”

*translation 1: "oh my! you fucking—ugh, god..."

*translation 2: "i swear if there's another one-"

★ Lance Stroll

he’d main rosalina, maybe? or maybe lakitu or shy guy—any one of them

his favourite cup by far is the flower cup, mainly because first off, it’s not too intense

and secondly, he just thinks it's cute

whenever you play, it’s usually very casual—you mostly play on either 100cc or 150cc if you’re feeling a little competitive

the two of you just laze on his couch with your limbs entangled, eyes trained on the screen and just having fun

it’s genuinely very sweet 

he never really rages at mario kart either, he doesn’t take it serious enough

although whenever he wins or gets top 3, he does get happy (even though it is almost every race that he does)

just this silly cute grin plastered on his face

especially when you’re also winning with him!

just smiling softly while saying, “did you see that drift?”

and you just smile back

he’s so cute!!! how could you not?

The two of you are sitting on Lance’s couch, in his living room, your head resting on his shoulder, your eyes glued to the screen as you drive around the Mario Kart racetrack. 

There’s only you, him, the TV, and the game's sound. It’s comforting, warm, and Lance’s heartbeat is a steady rhythm beating by your ear.

“Ooo! Did’ya see that?” he murmurs against your scalp, his voice is soft—barely audible as he presses a soft kiss against your head, “that drift was insane.”

“I’m sure it was.”

★ Isack Hadjar

he’s a toad main, and i feel like further elaboration is unnecessary

playing mario kart is basically him driving f1, it’s life or death for him, and he will play as competitively as possible

in a boyfriend™ way, of course

the two of you play on 150 or 200cc at all times, always fully locked in

his favourite cup is also the triforce cup because he thinks it is hilarious when you either fall off the map or something

(he gets mad when he does, though)

when you get too close, just like yuki, he will kick you 

it’s all fun and games, though! he only does it when he knows you don’t mind

oh whenever he sees you in front and he just happens to have a projectile—he throws it immediately

just to see that grumpy expression 

he genuinely just says something like, “tough luck, babe” and laughs

karma is a bitch, though, and like ten seconds after you see him fly past your screen but backwards because he got hit by lightning and then red shelled

he also swears in his mother tongue, like yelling because this game is broken! 

afterwards, the two of you make up with a soft exchange of kisses and watch youtube, muttering truce? truce.

A wave of pride washes over you as you see the number in the corner turn into a one as you overtake Princess Peach for first place. You let out a triumphant yes! and the exact moment you do, you hear a mischievous laugh from Isack.

You feel doom approaching as you hear how a shell approaches. 

“You are fucking with me, Isack! Seriously?”

“Blame the game, not the player.” He laughs.

©lilliezzzzz-fics: please don't copy or distribute my work on any platform

[jackdaw-sprite]

With @vladdyissues sharing this gif in that poll about Amity Park's location, it seems pretty set that Amity Park is in Indiana, not Illinois.

Leaving aside where that clip has been through all the debates about its location, it does mean we could do something fun with it.

You see, one of the few things I know about Indiana is that time has been...inconsistently handled there, historically.

I don't mean they flip-flop on whether to use DST. I mean they flip flopped between using DST and not using DST, and between using Eastern Time versus Central time, not on a state level, but on a county level. State law only made every county observe DST in 2006.

From Wikipedia:

The tz database lists 11 time zones for Indiana, where each zone is defined as a geographic area that observed the same offsets from UTC since January 1, 1970.

And that's not all! In 1978, some guy named Thomas Shanks published The American Atlas, in which he "identified 345 areas in the state with a different time zone history for each."

345 areas. In 1978, before several additional county-level changes to time zones.

The wikipedia article I'm pulling this from, Time in Indiana (yes it really has its own article) also says:

Attitudes began to change in the 1990s, as Indiana's time zone situation was seen as impeding the state's economic growth. Interstate travel and commerce were difficult as people wondered, "what time is it in Indiana?"

That's right, the situation was so comically bad that it affected the economy. Incredible.

What I'm saying is: You know that occasional idea where Amity Park's just a little bit out of time from everywhere around it? Just a little off-kilter, hard to find by accident?

In Indiana, time is already weird. How hard would it be for ghosts to make that a little bit more literal?

[mountainrusing]

After being yelled at (somehow affectionately) by a frazzled Remus Lupin for approximately five hours, the Gryffindor common room was back in order, and Lily and James had returned from their romantic morning rendezvous, where they’d walked the grounds and smelled the ugly roses and fed each other tasteless breakfast as they picnicked on the soggy grass and snogged like vulgar sinners—

The end, then they died, and everyone would call them ‘Romeo and Juliet’ even though they weren’t really in love, more like overly infatuated with each other, and way too dramatised, and generally something that shouldn’t be romanticised. Really not the greatest love story in the world. Where had that notion even arisen from?

Although ‘R and J’ could be ‘Remus and James,’ and that would be the play to watch… Mary would write it… Remus would kill her… But secretly, he’d read it to himself every night, and that would be their life.

She’d watch him watch James, while she’d watch Lily, and one time, she’d asked him, “Does it ever feel like your heart’s too big for your ribcage?”

He’d stared at her, and with finality, he’d answered, “Yes.”

So it would always feel that way, when she looked at Lily while Lily looked at James. It was supposed to be that way.

They’d arrived, and Mary and Remus had stared for a second too long, while James bounded over to Sirius to gush about his top-secret present for Lily, leading him up the stairs to see if it was all in order for their afternoon date in Hogsmeade.

Lily smiled at Mary, joked, “Should I be overly enthusiastic about his gift too?”

Mary rolled her eyes, “We already know it’s better than anything he could give you.”

Suddenly, James came crashing down the stairs again, gaze snagging Remus as he rushed over to him, “You made reservations at Puddifoot’s for us?!” Grabbing Remus’s hands, he bounced them up and down, “You’re the best, I love Puddifoot’s! It’s incredibly underrated and over-hated, actually, the cupid paintings are so cute! Ma says that they look like me when I was a baby. Also, everything being pink is not ugly, people are just scared of how it represents ultimate bravery. Pa says that pink was the original colour for courage. And, I used to have tea parties with my parents all the time, they’re so fun, I had little teacups and everything!”

“Mhm,” Remus was nodding, up and down like a bobble-head, smiling as round as one too.

“Wait,” Peter asked, looking lost. “When you said us, you meant for you and Lily, right? Not for you and Remus…?”

Immediately, James let go of Remus’s hands, turning to face Peter and pushing his glasses up his nose, “Well, of course I meant Lily and I, we’re dating,” he added obviously. About Remus, he gestured without looking, “He booked it for us, though.”

Dropping one foot at a time without lifting it, Sirius plodded slowly and abruptly down the staircase, looking unimpressed, “Remus had the idea to book them. I was the one who paid.”

“Yeah, thanks,” James waved him off. “You have unlimited money and Remus has unlimited kindness, now, in comparison—”

Sirius ran at him, knocking him over as they both burst into laughter, wrestling as if they were extremely territorial predators, whose territories were apparently each other.

Lily huffed fondly, “My boyfriend and his many boyfriends.”

“Aw, babe,” Mary joked. “Don’t worry, you have many girlfriends too.”

“Me, me, me!” Marlene cheered. “And Emmeline, be Lily’s girlfriend!”

“...Consent not a thing anymore?” Emmeline suggested as Marlene roped her into a hug, all four of them.

“‘Course it’s a thing, those cool posters said so,” Marlene replied undoubtedly.

Over the tops of their heads, Lily met Mary’s eyes, smiling, and she mouthed, You’re making the world better.

— extract from

she’s Black, she’s Broken, she’s Beautiful

[lunchboxe]

Tokyo debunker City of Omens (spoilers again ofc)

First of all,

"not an Otome game" bitch u ain't fooling ANYONE

HYDE TRIED TO FUCKING KILL ROMEO??? IS THAT WHY THERE WASNT A BUS WAITING, CUZ HE WASNT EXPECTED TO MAKE IT BACK IN THE FIRST PLACE???

Once again, not a fucking otome.

Did they know what was going to happen? Hodge and Podge, did they give her that knowing that if they didn't she may die?

So. Elias, Gen, Mio, and now Shion. Those are the names we have, one of which is the Janitor. Speaking of:

Man I really hope Elias is just, like, an ex-student pretending to be a staff member or smth cuz if he isn't then the subtle flirting ("dear heart" and such) is just really fuckin creepy TvT If he is around the same age as the students, yay, cool character fun mystery, if he isn't, >:T tf is this guy's problem

Also his dumdum is gone. Not sure what that means but the dumdum is gone.

ONE LAST THING.

I was right. I was so incredibly right, "how do they know about that, it was only me and him in the room" Abt the warding card, then a cat walks in, I WAS SO RIGHT ABOUT THE CATS SPYING ON THEM (at least that's my interpretation of the scene) I WAS SO INCREDIBLY RIGHT

[bloodbrown]

I need to see Ps attraction to seeing through lies in extensive detail that was an incredible take, and I need it

P's existence is to lie. From the moment he woke up, he was told: you are a special puppet. You must lie.

As a puppet, P's true feelings are hidden deep within him as it is. His lies serve as a function to further conceal his already-buried emotions, but also to soothe others, and sometimes just to trick people, simply for the fun of it.

Everyone fell for P's lies. He knew this, and felt a sort of pride over his skill-- he could use his lies to make people feel better and they'd never suspect a thing. He could tell anybody anything he wanted and they'd believe it. If he really wanted to, he could use his lies to shirk his responsibilities or keep secrets. P didn't want to use his lies maliciously, but he knew he could nonetheless. He was just that good.

You scoffed at the idea that the puppet was a "good liar." It was obvious when he was spinning some lie, which he often did. His left eyelid would twitch, and he'd inevitably reach to adjust some strand of hair or a fold in his clothes after he made something up. It was so obvious that it nearly hurt. You saw through the puppet boy completely. Everything about him, you studied and understood.

"Save the bullshit for someone who's going to believe it," you'd tell him, annoyed with his pointless white lies- like that time he claimed he'd never met Alidoro before he arrived at the hotel.

Then there was that time he claimed he'd taken care of that guard puppet prowling the grounds around the hotel, but you still heard it clunking outside your window at night. "Liar." You jabbed your index finger at him, prompting a stiff, pointed frown and an annoyed squint from the typically stoic puppet. "That thing's still alive. You didn't kill it, Geppetto's Puppet!"

P didn't like the way you saw through him. But... no, he did. Your words made his p-organ clench up and his face hot. That, in turn, made the ergo in his heart whisper and tremble. You made him feel embarrassed. Everyone else took the puppet at face value, but you pierced through his unaffected exterior. He didn't like that he liked that.

Eventually, P found himself yearning for it, that burning bubble of human feelings he felt shifting deep in his p-organ. The feelings that only you could tease out with your honest words. Maybe he even started lying more to get you to correct him. He'd find himself drawn to you, too, looking for you to dig deeper into him. Your words, your gaze, everything about you made the ergo in his veins burn up, and he wanted more of it...

[wanderingmind867]

Lex Luthor is a character who I can't help but like. He's very different from the Joker, but I somehow love both of them. I think it's just the two opposite ends of an extreme. Joker is practically a living cartoon of a man. He's way more entertaining than his superhero rival. Meanwhile, Lex Luthor is clearly worse than Superman, but he's also fun and uniquely tragic in his own right.

He grew up with nothing, and he had to climb his way to the top. He's scared of Superman, because he doesn't understand the unknown and new. He sees Superman as a man who gets adulation for his superpowers, while he (a man who worked for everything) gets no honour and respect. He's obsessed with the idea of beating Superman, because Superman embodies the concept of getting ahead for nothing. That's how I see their rivalry, and it actually helps make their dynamic way more interesting. The enterprising and headstrong man with no powers vs the humble man who has all the powers. It's almost a philosophical battle.

So Joker is a character I like, but I love him largely for his comedy and his humour. Lex is a villain who I came to appreciate because of his backstory and life experiences. They're very different, but they're equally as fun. And stories that show them working together are always incredibly fun.