#theres no reason to keep that anymore
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Kamen Rider Geats episode 41 poorly summarized via memes with as little context as possible:
#kamen rider geats poorly summarized#kamen rider geats#kamen rider geats ep 41#so much happened#good for you tsumuri for being plot relevant again#ik her arc is about the fact she has no agency or anything#and like shes learning to care and do stuff#but like damn really wouldve appreciated more of that talk with keiwa#granted they showed enough to get the point across#both that tsumuri is choosing to do this#and that keiwa is uhhhh making Decisions#but still#love that ace rewrote the world and kept his dumbass fame#theres no reason to keep that anymore#in fact it is detrimental at times#but pretty boys gotta get their attention somehow ig#neon i am so sorry everyone in your girl group keeps dying#if the door makes no sense just think about how one might describe keiwa this week#i love watching the boys fight#also their alliance sucks so bad#ace you couldve told either of the two riders about the stage 2 jyamato#or better yet CAPTURED IT#instead of just zoooming out of there#so that the jyamato could go on to then attack the construction site and nearly kill people? potentially kill people offscreen?#love buffa's 'shit not again face'#also speaking of fights CANE#that's all
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Come back home when you have some sense
You can throw your life away just not at my expense
You’re not the son I raised
#jhariah#this one just rawrrfrrr#and then uh another line thats like ‘tell me did you raise a man?’#nice#im just listening to the new album to cope with nasty sickness and feeling out of it#god this album is really good it has every emotion in there like this song for example just the part where they scream the chorus its like#hnnnghhh#hm some other moments from the album im liking a lot uhhh i love re: concerns a lot#the part where hes like reading off the complaints and then the part where hes just screaming and its like BAM BAM BAM BAAAM#sasuke is so good and the bit at the end where its like ‘i just want you to know im so so...’#like hes gonna say sorry but cant seem to say the word for whatever reason and i know nothing about sasuke#but i has to imagine the fan girlies are eating gravel over that one lol it gets me#and theres just that like spooky echoing afterwards#the intro to fire4fun goes SOOOOOOOO hard i was losing my shit its awesome#the entirety of trust ceremony is giving me big feelings but specifically that part towards the end where its all quiet and you hear#its like whistling i think? like a marching band is coming in maybe#but it also kinda sounds like nature too and idk i like got a little bit um magical at that part cuz i was driving down a big hill#and it had been raining but there was a clearing in the clouds and the sun was bright and like at this particular hill#you can just see everything like the land stretches for miles theres trees hills the river farms all that shit#and idk with the extreme stress and depression ive been feeling its hard to have these moments where life seems worth it#and its hard to really feel anything anymore or to feel in the moment but idk i was just going down that hill seeing everything and it was#very majestic so yeah that song is definitely gonna have the same effect as pin eye for me#which i must mention pin eye again its still OOOOGHH very good it came at a pretty good time for me#yeah basically this album is uhhhh whats keeping me somewhat grounded rn i recommend 👍
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thinks about the master & the doctor cuddling thinks about them cuddling thinks about them cuddling thinks about them cuddlign thinks-
#its a vrry specific flavor of cuddling its like.#its exhausted. first of all. and its lonely.#its the kind of cuddling that starts because one of you literally flopped on top of the other and wouldnt move#and then started squirming to become an even bigger hiderance than they already were if they were being ignored#its a puppy pile of two. they are in the weirdest most uncomfortable looking positions imaginable#you look at them and you think ‘this is how glass sculptures would cuddle if glass sculptures had feelings and were touch-starved’#its a cuddle that might end with one of them putting the other in a full body lock for whatever reason. either to keep them from running#or because they had a nightmare. they do have nightmares you know. and they aren’t fun to sleep next to. the best comfort is a good defense#its the kind of cuddling where one of them is awake for too long. breathing slowly so they dont disturb their partner and staring.#memorizing. taking note of every difference since last time.#its the kind of cuddling where even if you walked in on them at a point where while they were asleep theyd scooted apart and weren’t#touching anymore. you’d still notice that they’re practically mirror images. curled up the same way and facing each other. until one of them#kicks in their sleep and disturbs the illusion. but still.#you get me?#and also theres biting.
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imagine being Misty Fey and leaving your daughters in the care of your asshole sister who frames one of them for murder and is literally just about to do it again, knowing that the asshole sister has a daughter who killed two (debatably three) people and nearly killed another. You keep track of one of your daughter's life enough to notice that that one kid that your niece tried to kill interned with your daughter and defended your other daughter for the first daughter's murder because they met at the crime scene and became instant buddies and the first time you meet your remaining child she doesn't recognize you. You will never be able to tell her who you are because you get murdered that night.
#i am always thinking about a bridge to the turnabout btw#you think she looked at phoenix interacting with Maya and was like 'welp I guess I have a son now'#lost one lawyer daughter and gained one lawyer son#her reputation had to have been crazy for her to disappear for so long like holy crap#i bet she was at Mia's funeral in a disguise#she's kind of fascinating actually i wonder how much she actually knew...#she may be a deadbeat but she's so interesting to think about#i like to think she tried to silently keep up with her kids but couldn't contact them#she definitely shouldve though#at least after morgan was jailed like... what are you waiting for? dl6 was solved! maya could channel greg again and ask why he lied!#theres literally no reason to just dip out forever anymore!#i hate her i want to study her I want her to haunt the narrative more#misty fey#ace attorney#i want misty to watch courtroom recordings because she's desperate to see her daughters#she gets to know phoenix as shes trying to keep up with Mia and Maya#middle child phoenix supremacy#imagine realizing that this random guy has done more to protect and save your daughter than you have by just being there for her
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i would rather live with ana for the rest of my life than binge like this ever again
#rending.txt#i dont know how to stop binging i was doing so well yesterday and then for no reason it fell apart#i just want to stop#i have so much to do today but i just dont want to do anything im so depressed#im just going to lay in bed and eat all day and think up ways to die#i already know my chosen method i just cant be bothered right now so maybe later#i just want to keep sleeping#i called in sick to work today because i was so so tired and i slept i think nearly 12 hours which isnt bad#i wanna go on a walk and work out and stuff but i just. cant right now. i need to work on my job presentation but i just cant#i just want to keep eating and go back to sleep and then wake up and end it#but i just need to make it to therapy tomorrow and maybe itll get better? who knows#i dont even have the energy to walk up to tesco to get blades or more food so im laying im bed eating dry granola like a pathetic pig#i dont wanna talk to anyone but my boyfriend but hes asleep and i dont want to vent to him anymore because it makes me feel guilty#and it doesnt help to vent to him anymore so i just make him sad for no reason and i dont know how to vent to anyone else#i havent changed my bedsheets in weeks and theres so much trash on my floor you can barely walk in my room and i havent showered in a week#i just dont have the heart to cry anymore i just want it to stop#i did everything i was supposed to so i could prevent binges and it didnt work at all so i think im beyond saving lol
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#periodical life updates#eurgh. hiiii im so tired just got home from the family gathering thing im. exhausted hkjfh. and i still gotta draw the eca#still gonna be quiet for a while sorry gang <3 anyway lets not talk about any of that hdkjf ARTFIGHT THEME REVEAL!!#you'll never guess which team jace ''kellystar321'' starlight is choosing for seafoam vs stardust hfjkh#*gestures at my oc list* but also. what if i dont CARE anymore hfjkhf obviously i want to draw for people! its my favorite part! but like.#GODDD i dont care about my ocs anymore!! :') ive always been more of a fandom guy i dont... /want/ art of my ocs?#like yeah obviously agent my beloved! alexandria my beloved! eca has a whole daily blog! but my actual interest in them is sooo low.#there's so many people on artfight who LOVE their ocs like their children. their ocs are their blorbos!! but my ocs are like nothing to me?#i like fandom characters :'0 i would not be as excited to see art of my characters as someone else would be who actually likes their ocs!!#people should focus more on drawing art for people who CARE about their ocs. because if /I/ don't care about my oc and /YOU/ don't care#about my ocs then WHOS FLYING THE PLANE HJFSD no but theres ZERO ENJOYMENT coming out of it you get me? it doesnt make sense to draw for me#BUT ALSO. for silly ''i dont like seeing them all greyed out/hidden :('' reasons i dont want to archive them and hide them from everyone#/BUT ALSO./ i DON'T WANT ART OF THEM. ATTACK SOMEONE ELSE PLEASE. SOMEONE WHO CARES ABOUT THEIR CHARACTERS hfjkfh urgh.#like hey sorry i dont? care enough about the guys i made up? can you draw reader or kim k!tsuragi instead? thank you. hdjhfg;;;#also ive been. so tired :'> how much will i even be able to do this year? every year i gain more targets to attack because i keep meeting-#new friends all the time. i have some people from lgbt club im attacking this year! my stickmin friends. avm friends. my hell gang hkhg#my hlvrai friends and my longtime mutuals and MY BUREAU OF BALANCE GANG... not to mention revenges from last year :'>#its a lot. and im so tired;;; so. im not sure. i'd still like to join for my 8th year of artfight but damb. i dunno. :'> <3#okay thats all GOTTA DRAW AN ECA GOODBYE I LOVE YOU!!
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god I know this is like The Wrong Stance on AI. I know its not about whether the art is Real and Human or If It Has A Soul and how a lot of the arguments against it are the same bullshit arguments people made against digital art like I Know. I Knowwww. but god, I'm really sorry, not to post like one of those annoying poetry bloggers I cant stand (yall are valid, live your truth, theres nothing wrong with what you post I'm just a petty bitch who hates poetry. unless I dont hate it.)
But theres just something about the way AI art will almost certainly never be able to mimic the exact way my pencil leaves an indentation in the paper, the way some of the lines I can never fully erase cause I pressed too hard, theyll have to at least train them to draw with a physical pencil first, and sure, they could train it to draw with a pencil and even erase the exact same piece I drew, line for line, on a piece of paper with a robot arm powered by AI, but they can't replicate. idk. the lineage of lefty bitches in my family, and the way I grew up going through school with my entire left arm silver with graphite, from doodling on my schoolwork. not yet anyway. but I guess I do live for the day we make the ai sentient enough that we can traumatize it by giving it homework after kneecapping its executive functions so it copes by drawing a big tiddy lobster monster. sure
#toy txt post#reblogs OFF i dont trust yall to be normal with this one i do NOT want it getting notes#i posted part of this before in a chat to a friend but im feeling it again. so#i havent drawn my big tiddy lobster bitch in awhile i should draw her again#also yea SORRY im sure this is The Wrong Feeling To Have About AI but also sometimes im a little grateful that i dont think my style is#smth a lot of the ppl coding ai to make art find to be worth trying to replicate except maybe as like a fake progress shot on a piece#which is smth i used to be really insecure about. how unfinished all my art looks bc it isnt to the point i cant fucking watch#like speedpaints and shit bc i just start feeling stupidly insecure about all the points in the video where I Would Have Stopped and been#like. im not touching it anymore i dont want to ruin it#and ive been insecure about my inability to really do digital art with like a stylus and shit like the way i do it with a pencil#and i know that is just me needing to Practice it but being too frustrated by it#anyway i know its just a Tool and its Fine and the problem is the art theft and the labor problems of it but liiiiiiike#i just.#im sure there will be unique things and usages of ai as a tool and i genuinely hope that ppl can figure out a way to make one that isnr#isnt* just full of stolen content bc theres unique fuckin shit about like digital art programs u can write stupid poetry that you hate#about it. or stupid poetry that i hate. cos im the poetry hater. listen. i cant stress this enough: its fine. youre fine. keep posting your#poetry and reblogging shit that speaks to you. im just a Bitch okay Ignore Me#i should go draw bokrae like. eating a computer about this#the real reason for that graphics card shortage was bokrae ate them all when she was in the mood for a crunchy snack
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just as a heads up i might have this blog running on queue for a couple of days slash a week until i decide what to do with this blog!
#.txt#idk if im feeling just sad for unrelated reasons or this blog isnt really that fun anymore and I should just stick to my personal#oh well we will see#you know the drill. if theres something you want me to see in the meantime ask for discord or dm!#i prommy i will keep up
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Sorry im bitchin sumn fierce
My grandparents are both ridiculously annoying to deal with but my grandfather specifically is pissing me off rn. Bc he's always been the one to say one thing and then do another so I know I can't trust him. I didnt tell them I moved back home bc I wasnt gonna deal with them calling me talkin bout how stupid and dependent I am when like. I just missed having people around who actually fucking like me. And he has the nerve to call/text me trying to have me come to Florida with him as if the past 3 years didn't happen! I'm already too far away for that but also funny to assume I have the time for that when I've mentioned more than once that I'm in school. Saying "I'm always here for you <:)" after treating me like shit and making me feel bad for wanting better doesn't fix this! Acting as if I didn't literally BEG you to talk to me instead of berating me doesn't fix this! I don't want anything to do with people that have said out right that they don't respect me or my life! Idec if they're actually worried or whatever, I finally have something going on for me and I'm not lettin you back into my life bc you just now feel like you fucked up. I want an actual conversation and apology. I want you to acknowledge what was said and done without hearing "well if you weren't lazy/stupid/etc". Otherwise leave me aloneee
#he keeps texting me trying to get me to come to florida like again. we havent talked since i moved out. im not doin that#there's a reason we havent talked since i moved out#theres a reason we literally almost never talked when I still lived there! and it wasn't jus tthe fact that I was working all yhe time!!#im so exhausted with my dads family they love to bicker but hate to actually fix shit#so im not gonna bother anymore either i asked to have a civil conversation and still havent gotten it so goodbye#mag.txt
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trying to find some oldass drawings of one of my first sonas i havent been able to find em yet but instead ive just been unearthing all these old notes an ex friend and i would pass to each other back in middle school
#fucking insane i forgot abt a lot of these. i feel kinda bad keeping them that person kind offfff completely ruined my and many of my#friends lives but also. theyre kinda funny to look back on idk#theres one they made that was like ‘i drew the 2 of us as guys haha no reason lol’. idk how he identifies now but back then they were#very very openly a lesbian and last time id heard of him he had transed his gender#i remmeber . so clearly feeling some kinda way abt the art i couldnt articulate at all at the time. Lol#god that whole situation was so fucked im not gonna get into all my personal middle school bullshit becuz it was soooo stupid but like. man#insane#i know ive always been kind of a pushover ill admit but its soooo frustrating looking back like. man..HOW did i just not say anything at al#i wouldnt have gotten into that whole mess if id just been honest 😭 i mean tbh that guy was . i dont want to say anything too like . awful#he was going through a lot absolutely had his own issues they were working thruwe were all like 12 but again .#completely ruined me nd my friends lives for a while . i feel like he wouldve just pulled rhe same thing w someone else as the main target#okay no i need to stop talking abt this i said i wouldnt over share#its mostly just funny seeing all the old art tbh. most of it was before shit got bad so its sorta bittersweet in a way#inquisitivewaltz.txt#i dint know why im talkign abt this sorry#this is honestly something i think abt a lot sometimes . especially the stupider nd more mundane bits#but it was such an awful part of all out lives i cant really discuss it much w friends#everyone else has a much more ‘thank god were not in that anymore now lets pretend it never happened’ outlook on it which is understandable#idk#sorry im oversharing again i need to start keeping a journal or some shit
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day 5. the bots are starting to make fan accounts
#ive been watching them for a few hours now and im getting more that look the same so im PRETTY SURE theyre bots#theyre writing bios now with their fandoms listed..........#its like 'hi! im [name]! and im in [fandoms]!' pretty copy paste but with random fandoms listed#this is psychological warfare at this point#like how am i supposed to be able to 100% know#it speaks#ok yeah ive been getting more of them theyre all acting identically but im still keeping an eye on them#for science reasons#also woke up to 200 bot follows overnight so that was fun to deal with this morning#I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE THIS IS RIDICULOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#afraid if i send some complaint to tumblr theyll just nuke my blog like they nuked all the tags that had bots in them#i dont know how much longer i can keep up the fight for#ALSO they are all brand new blogs so i doubt theres a mass wave of new owl house fans joining tumblr all at the same time
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#idk man. i think im just gonna post any remaining art i have and then just quit. it just isnt fun anymore? idk#life mostly isnt fun anymore tbh. i had a bad night/morning at work and just. its making me think abt things#mainly the thought that keeps running through my head is whats the point?#i think the only thing that makes me happy rn is my dogs. one is turning 10 next week and thats making me v depressed on top of everything#maybe ill change my mind lmao i probably will but. even thinking abt being creative makes me so sad for some reason#which sucks! everything fucking sucks the only emotions i feel lately is anger depression anxiety and embarrassment#and ive been trying to be optimistic but theres only so much positivity in me. i cant do this shit anymore#maybe things will get better or at least not get worse but that seems unlikely#ignore me
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I have a longing to be understood more than anything else i think
#someone very recently acknowledged something that usually goes unseen and it wasn't even that great of an acknowledgement but ive just been#staring at the messages every once in a while. its great. not really i sort of feel like a real weirdo#im very lonely. i cant say why but let it be known that i am very lonely#ok i have a question to those who lie their eyes upon this post: tell me what you know about me please?#so much lies in my social perception and i am just. not being perceived. at all. darn#i have a lot to cry about but morally i dont think i should-- specifics would mean being mean to the people i love#talking to anyone anymore just makes me feel horrible. doing anything anymore makes me feel horrible..tmbg has my back though ill live for#another.week or a few. and then my birthday will happen and rhen um#.Well. it sucks that sucks man. i dont want to disclose my age but to elaborate on why ACTUALLY HOLD ON#the thing i am about to say is not true; it is a metaphorical thing: it is my 21st birthday soon.#i decided that i wouldnt live past this age around 5 years ago and the only reason ive lived five years is being killed this year. i dont#think every thing ive been desperately clinging on to for the past 2 (?) years can keep me alive past then..i think im going to die. i have#to#NO MORE BEING A DOWNER#fox (vulpes vulpes) on the Internet for the first time#okay maybe a little more..i dont know who im talking to in this post. my friends do not read my tumblr and. i dont know anyone else.really.#uh#I'm listen to tmbg right now i love them#hey reader; i can only think of 3 people who see enough about me to check my blog. so i have separate questions for the each of you.#one of you likes (liked? school came in and i couldnt see your blog much past then; idk if its changed) tmbg. what do you think of The Else?#and uh you there... the guyyy. Google john flansburgh..i dont have a reason to this one ive just not been able to stop thinking about askin#you what you think of him.#um third person..... um#okay theres nothing iecan ask. i do want to apologize to you though: im sorry.#iThis is bullshit#im gonna delete this soon#Um also sorry if my wording here is. really wack. i tend to do that#i dont think anyones going to see this as is always#i think i just like talking to the hypothetical beast. yeah
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google how to believe your friends when they tell you that they love you quick solution
#cicadas vent tag#honestly i think a lot of this stems from the idea that nobody truly loves me#i'm only loved because you feel like you have to to keep me from killing myself . or to make me feel better . or because i'm something you#can save or get your rocks off to#im only ever talked to because im intresting#i can tell you a bug fact or write about your ocs or talk about being an alternate or mikey walters#without that im nothing#theres no reason to be my friend anymore#eventually something more interesting and pitiable will come along and ill be alone#hhhhhhh#i hate friendship
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#vent#it feels awful#not knowing what the fuck to do#i WANT like a fucking gluttonous beast#i wanna be good at everything#i wanna be good at art and singing and worldbuilding and writing and editing and animating and academics#and i never feel satisfied#and no ones forcing me to do any of this#i just fucking want to for some reason and its destroying me#i just end up being not good at anything. im shit at studying and sleeping and keeping to deadlines#i want there to be enough time for me to explore everything#for me to learn everything at my own pace and perfect my skills#but it just feels like i have no time for myself anymore#everything i have i must dedicate to studying for a levels and its so tiring. i wanna draw and be creative too but theres so much course#content that its killing me. i want my free time back#and im forever thankful to my parents for moving with me all the way to the uk so i can learn about things that actually interest me but#even that doesnt really mean anything anymore thanks to the standardization of education and especially exams and exam boards#so my parents spent all that effort and money for nothing and i really just want to break down and cry and say sorry#but that would just hurt them even more and even i dont have the heart to do that so im stuck with this and im so goddamn tired#and of course by spreading my attention and efforts so thin everything i do is lackluster so of course my grades are shit#and i get sick often so my attendence record is also shit#it just feels like im a burden for existing like a malignant tumour#and i have to relearn how to cry. imagine that. a grown adult not knowing how to cry#i never knew there was supposed to be emotional relief when crying sometimes because whenever i cry when im overwhelmed...or anytime really#i get told to stop immediately so i got trained to hold everything in.and i get that its easy for the adults to deal with a not-crying child#but i kinda feel cheated#i want that emotional catharsis that comes with crying your feelings out and i have to teach myself how to do it#how pathetic is that#had to get this out there its just too much for me#arc 3am logs
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watching jordan's dad be a huge dick about their gender when a couple hours ago I was on the phone w my dad & he's like "mom was telling me you said you were gonna officially get your name changed you know I have you in my phone as syd you have to do what makes you happy in this life & not hold yourself back for other people's sake" is just so like. ok cryign now.
#there was one person i was wanting to keep the peace with by not changing it & now that theres been an unrelated falling out i have no#reason not to anymore. im just glad my parents are like actually cool i never would've reallt expected it when i was a teenager#texticles
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