#in fact it is detrimental at times

[new-haven-psych-ward]

Kamen Rider Geats episode 41 poorly summarized via memes with as little context as possible:

[frobby]

i think a core component of the okumura twins relationship is that if you told them before the series what happens in the future, they would worry about each other before themselves

[straycalamities]

i hate hate hate hate hate so much when people take you forgetting things as caring less about them or whatever it is you forgot not having meaning to you "enough" to remember

i forget things that mean the world to me all the fucking time like i'm sorry i'm just like this

[cologona]

I’ve gotten oversaturated on good sibling Tim and Dick stuff they’re all members of the deeply toxic family dynamic how about we let them suck just a little bit 2024.

[jemmo]

i finally got the time to watch love is better the second time around and im not at all shocked that im obsessed with the adult second chance at love jbl - have you met me.

but it also needs to be known that shiraishi is my beloved, the actor plays this role so perfectly and i want my bitchy sad gay to find true love

[absentlyabbie]

i've developed some interesting methods of handling having a relationship with my mother who made my childhood/teen years misery and committed more than a little abuse.

as an adult, we have a very different dynamic, her daughters (sister and i) have confronted her with a lot of her bullshit and the things she both did and enabled. for some she has been sorrowful and even sometimes apologetic. she's a better mother to me now than she ever was when i most needed one. so i'll never actually trust her again, and she'll never be much deeper than surface level in my life, but we have something mostly good now, and on my terms.

however, she is very definitely one of those "i don't remember it that way" and "i did the best i could" mothers in a lot of areas, and has also always been the type to (probably unconsciously) emotionally manipulate the people she's hurt into catering to her hurt feelings about it instead.

over the years i've learned to get really comfortable with just not indulging it.

is she having a bad day, seems sad and upset? i'll give her a hug, try to make her laugh. if she throws broad hints it's a surge of hurt feelings about having driven one of her children to cut her off? well i'm just gonna stand there and not acknowledge or entertain it.

"well, apparently i was a bad mother" or shit like that? i'm just gonna look at her for a second, and i might either shrug or even nod, but i'm not saying a damn thing. i'm not awkwardly, uncomfortably, painfully contorting to her guilt trip nonsense. i'm not apologizing or trying to soothe her or reassure her or minimize it.

like, yeah. you really were. you know it, glad to hear it. we've definitely had that talk.

best kindness, most generosity i can offer her in times like that is not maintaining eye contact to bluntly tell her "yeah, you were." she can go ahead and feel bad about it.

it's not on me to make her feel less bad. she should feel bad. and i am definitely not someone she gets to seek comfort from about it.

hopefully someday she'll inch past just "poor me, i'm so sad and angsty about it" towards, like, examining the whys and acknowledging what she actually did wrong and work actively to be be better. in a few places, some of that has happened.

but that's her work. her job and responsibility. she can do that shit on her own time.

i say all this to offer a shoulder of solidarity to others like me. if you maintain a complicated relationship as an adult with the parent who hurt you and did you wrong as a child, that is okay. you get to choose how and if to thread that needle.

but you don't have to accommodate emotional manipulation and guilt trip garbage. stonewall it. walk away if you need to. don't apologize. don't try to make it better. that's not on you and it doesn't have to be. it's okay.

[sandycookie]

fellas the book 7 update…. *crying*

(refer to the tags for my rambling, just to minimize ppl accidentally spoiling themselves)

[daisies-on-a-cup]

part of me believes that community is foundational and that is it true that human beings were made to be "pack people" and were never supposed to go about this life alone. part of me also believes that going to the grocery store with people you love, doing random, mundane things with those you cherish, is a good thing and deepens social bonds in a way that no other interaction can. however, i think if you can't do those things alone, if you can't go to the grocery store without a friend or eat something without someone next to you, then you are at huge risk of losing your sense of self. there's also something there about mental stability and independence, that if you can't do anything alone, be anywhere with just your thoughts and you alone, then there's something wrong there i think. it's not normal to need someone by your side every waking moment of your day or else something bad will happen. there shouldn't need to be a distraction of a phone or a person for everything you do. it is a beautiful and wonderful thing to do things together, but you should also be able to do it alone without falling to your own mind

[monster-noises]

There are things about my struggles with singleness i will gladly prattle on about on this web site in post after post and i Have, certainly;

but there are parts of the struggle I have just a damn hard time posting about despite really reeeeaallly needing to get out so i can maybe go focus on something else for a bit

And I mean this applies to more than just my (really uneventful but somehow just as consuming and complicated) dating life, but right now that's what i'm pacing around my apartment muttering about when i should be making sure my dinner doesn't burn and having my dishes done. So.

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

lies on the floor and has just So Many Feelings about all the ways in which pericles and cassidy are foils, one of them being the comparison between how they use constant, vocal, unabashed affirmation of the qualities they value about themselves to cope with rock bottom self-esteem.

there's so much to be said here about how pericles' 'positive' self-talk is ultimately destructive to himself and everyone around him, whereas cassidy's has both been healing for her and held her back from processing her self-loathing in other ways, and so much of that has to do with her experiencing firsthand the results of pericles' shit handling of his poor self-esteem and desperately not wanting to be anything like him. fuck me up man

[mitochondriaandbunnies]

The Outcasts (1968) - Episode 2: A Ride to Vengeance

This is the kind of show that starts with the main characters mugging "GASP! Did you STEAL the COOKIES?" faces in response to surprise false murder charges and ends with them bickering about money and riding away laughing while a couple they nearly broke up watches in mute disdain. However, It is also the kind of show that (without using the specific terminology, because it was written in 1968 and is about emotionally constipated men in 1873) unpacks the fact that a) the Black lead has PTSD as a result of being a slave, b) that a white man accused him of murder simply because he made a fool of him years earlier, and c) that he is aware of things as a Black man in 1800's America that the white lead is not and that the white lead doesn't need him to prove that to believe it's true. The tonal whiplash is occasionally vertigo-inducing.

[straylaughs]

also sorry for disappearing so much i think i ended up losing all my interests all at once so im in this weird limbo state of trying to keep them while trying desperately to find something new to keep me from spiralling

[sc-intothedarknightofthesoul]

Part of the reason why I've started to screen record my Libra of Soul gameplays (similar to why I recorded my SWTOR gameplays in the past) are in fact because there are story scenes I really liked, but unfortunately cannot replay to an extent.

While yes, I can replay some missions, but only the ones with the fighting gameplay.

My short term memory nowadays also sucks, especially now that I'm writing a fanfic.

[whitehartlane]

spurs fans you are a curious bunch

[cobra-creampuff]

dru bringing spike a puppy to eat instead of a person. it's certainly giving something.

[commissionsdarian]

Bunker again. Sorry