#and no ones forcing me to do any of this
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#vent#it feels awful#not knowing what the fuck to do#i WANT like a fucking gluttonous beast#i wanna be good at everything#i wanna be good at art and singing and worldbuilding and writing and editing and animating and academics#and i never feel satisfied#and no ones forcing me to do any of this#i just fucking want to for some reason and its destroying me#i just end up being not good at anything. im shit at studying and sleeping and keeping to deadlines#i want there to be enough time for me to explore everything#for me to learn everything at my own pace and perfect my skills#but it just feels like i have no time for myself anymore#everything i have i must dedicate to studying for a levels and its so tiring. i wanna draw and be creative too but theres so much course#content that its killing me. i want my free time back#and im forever thankful to my parents for moving with me all the way to the uk so i can learn about things that actually interest me but#even that doesnt really mean anything anymore thanks to the standardization of education and especially exams and exam boards#so my parents spent all that effort and money for nothing and i really just want to break down and cry and say sorry#but that would just hurt them even more and even i dont have the heart to do that so im stuck with this and im so goddamn tired#and of course by spreading my attention and efforts so thin everything i do is lackluster so of course my grades are shit#and i get sick often so my attendence record is also shit#it just feels like im a burden for existing like a malignant tumour#and i have to relearn how to cry. imagine that. a grown adult not knowing how to cry#i never knew there was supposed to be emotional relief when crying sometimes because whenever i cry when im overwhelmed...or anytime really#i get told to stop immediately so i got trained to hold everything in.and i get that its easy for the adults to deal with a not-crying child#but i kinda feel cheated#i want that emotional catharsis that comes with crying your feelings out and i have to teach myself how to do it#how pathetic is that#had to get this out there its just too much for me#arc 3am logs
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despite Laios low self esteem making him think that if heâd been eaten, Chilchuck and Marcille wouldnât have helped Falin,
theres a small part of me that thinks the reason Chilchuck stayed with the party and went back in the dungeon in the first place was because he didnât want to leave Laios alone. That Laios was moreso the reason he stayed.
#dungeon meshi#chilaios#OK SORRY. THE DEMONS. I REALLY DID NOT WANT TO LIKE THIS PAIRING. I DIDNT. BUT. HHH. FHFHJFJV. I FEEL CRAZY. LET ME EXPLAIN.#Pre canon it seems Laios is the person Chilchuck is really the closest to#He gets along with Namari and they are probably way better as buddies than he and Laios but#He and Laios seem *closer*#If that makes sense#Laios calls him his first name enough and without any issue or hesitation from Chilchuck#That I sort of inagine its not like. A misunderstanding. Laios is on a first name basis with him for a reason.#He also worries probably more than anyone about Laios#And his biggest criticism of him is that hes ârecklessâ#heâs comfortable around Laios in a very specific way and so is Laios around him#and in the series he shows many times that heâll risk his life to protect Laios#Like staying with him to confront the elves because he was worried Laios would say something stupid#Hes the first one to run up to him when Falin punches him#I mean I think he was also going back for Falin like its not like I think he doesnât care about her or anything#He clearly does#But I donât know if heâd have gone back if Laios hadnât#And if Laios had been eaten I think he wouldnât have even had to be convinced by Falin#I also think Marcille wouldâve gone back for him but probably more bc Falin was going back#Like sort of a reversed thing#AGAIN not that I donât think she cared about Laios at the beginning either#But she before the story she was mostly Falinâs friend who knew Laios through Falin#She only really got to know him when Falin got eaten and they had to do a team building exercise#Though now I sort of want to see an actually reversed scenario#Bc we also know that Chilchuck is sort of uncomfortable around Falin (said in relationship chart)#So I would love to see them be forced into a team building exercise to find a person they both love the way Laios and Marcille were
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you open my Super Important Documents and its just pictures of charles xavier
#xmen#mcu#xmen movies#xmen first class#charles xavier#professor x#snap sketches#todays schedule has been ruined by my ever occurring need to practice drawing movie charles its horrendous#i started this sheet last night but then i kept adding to it and i keep wanting to add to it but i MUST stop myself#in an ideal world i get paid to draw charles xavier and erik lehnsherr but no i live in this baka society#sleepless charles WAS inspired by me starting this at 1AM and forcing myself to sleep at 4AM#and then here i am picking i up still later .... i need professional help i fear but i aint got time for that#NEVERTHELESS I THINK IT GOT IT NOW. I THINK IM OK. i think i know how i wanna go bout drawing him now ...#chat can i confess that like. .5% of the reason i barely draw FC charles i because of his hair#for some reason some demonic entity prevents me from drawing it easily i am in STRUGGLE CITY#the only thing that gets me is that whenever i draw him i can only think of the likes of a disney prince but man thems the strokes ig#i also drew a quick dark phoenix charles but i figured id just keep this first class oriented#anything else i want to say ? uh. hm. its funny i never do any of these sheets for erik#genuinely On My Life made One (1) sheet and was like 'no yeah i got it. i got it down'#literally not my fault his head is So Shaped and defined but anyways. this aint about him.#i mean it could be. i still wanna do a doodle page concentrated on drawing how his powers show#more specifically how do i wanna draw the glow cause i cant decide on it ... also i wanna draw the 'levels' ...#but thats for another time. for right now i should probably eat i havent eaten all day#bye bye !!!!!! here's to hoping i draw something thats not a doodle sheet one of these days
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thinking about a whumpee on a forced march through rough terrain
hands tied in front of them, on foot while their captors are mounted, sleeping out in the open, forced to beg for adequate food and water
maybe they're barefoot, a captured royal in silken robes
maybe they're in a torn suit or soldier's uniform
maybe they were stripped at the start, increasing the exposure to the elements, the humiliation
are they a terrified mess from the beginning, or do they try to endure with dignity? how long before they're stumbling, barely putting one foot in front of the other? how long before they fall?
#im particularly thinking about a notorious captain or other commanding officer tbh#his enemies have faced defeat after defeat at his hands and now that they have him they want to make him suffer#they need to travel through the mountains to reach their capitol and -of course- they make him walk the whole way#but then someone suggests taking his boots and someone else suggests stripping him naked#they can't let him -die- before he can be paraded through the streets but they'll get him as close as they can#whump#whump prompt#captive#taken prisoner#forced nudity#nonsexual nudity#military whump#fantasy whump#this also randomly made me think of one of my ye olde whump scenarios#where a small regiment ends up surrounded by the enemy and thwir captain is doing his damndest to keep his men alive#and work out a strategy to retreat#but then the enemy soldiers offer to let the rest go if they turn over their leader and they do without a second thought#so not only is he captured he's also been betrayed and is just trying to keep it together emotionally#to do list#this would also be fun with sahota or any of the crew
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you're grabbing lunch with a nice man and he gives you that strange grimace-smile that's popular right now; an almost sardonic "twist" of his mouth while he looks literally down on you. it looks like he practiced the move as he leans back, arms folded. he just finished reciting the details of NFTs to you and explaining Oppenheimer even though he only watched a youtube about it and hasn't actually seen it. you are at the bottom of your wine glass.
you ask the man across from you if he has siblings, desperately looking for a topic. literally anything else.
he says i don't like small talk. and then he smiles again, watching you.
a few years ago, you probably would have said you're above celebrity gossip, but honestly, you've been kind of enjoying the dumb shit of it these days. with the rest of the earth burning, there's something familiar and banal about dragging ariana grande through the mud. you think about jeanette mccurdy, who has often times gently warned the world she's not as nice as she appears. you liked i'm glad my mom died but it made you cry a lot.
he doesn't like small talk, figure out something to say.
you want to talk about responsibility, and how ariana grande is only like 6 days older than you are - which means she just turned 30 and still dresses and acts like a 13 year old, but like sexy. there's something in there about the whole thing - about insecurity, and never growing up, and being sexualized from a young age.
people have been saying that gay people are groomers. like, that's something that's come back into the public. you have even said yourself that it's just ... easier to date men sometimes. you would identify as whatever the opposite of "heteroflexible" is, but here you are again, across from a man. you like every woman, and 3 people on tv. and not this guy. but you're trying. your mother is worried about you. she thinks it's not okay you're single. and honestly this guy was better before you met, back when you were just texting.
wait, shit. are you doing the same thing as ariana grande? are you looking for male validation in order to appease some internalized promise of heteronormativity? do you conform to the idea that your happiness must result in heterosexuality? do you believe that you can resolve your internal loneliness by being accepted into the patriarchy? is there a reason dating men is easier? why are you so scared of fucking it up with women? why don't you reach out to more of them? you have a good sense of humor and a big ol' brain, you could have done a better job at online dating.
also. jesus christ. why can't you just get a drink with somebody without your internal feminism meter pinging. although - in your favor (and judgement aside) in the case of your ariana grande deposition: you have been in enough therapy you probably wouldn't date anyone who had just broken up with their wife of many years (and who has a young child). you'd be like - maybe take some personal time before you begin this journey. like, grande has been on broadway, you'd think she would have heard of the plot of hamlet.
he leans forward and taps two fingers to the table. "i'm not, like an andrew tate guy," he's saying, "but i do think partnership is about two people knowing their place. i like order."
you knew it was going to be hard. being non-straight in any particular way is like, always hard. these days you kind of like answering the question what's your sexuality? with a shrug and a smile - it's fine - is your most common response. like they asked you how your life is going and not to reveal your identity. you like not being straight. you like kissing girls. some days you know you're into men, and sometimes you're sitting across from a man, and you're thinking about the power of compulsory heterosexuality. are you into men, or are you just into the safety that comes from being seen with them? after all, everyone knows you're failing in life unless you have a husband. it almost feels like a gradebook - people see "straight married" as being "all A's", and anything else even vaguely noncompliant as being ... like you dropped out of the school system. you cannot just ignore years of that kind of conditioning, of course you like attention from men.
"so let's talk boundaries." he orders more wine for you, gesturing with one hand like he's rousing an orchestra. sir, this is a fucking chain restaurant. "I am not gonna date someone who still has male friends. also, i don't care about your little friends, i care about me. whatever stupid girls night things - those are lower priority. if i want you there, you're there."
he wasn't like this over text, right? you wouldn't have been even in the building if he was like this. you squint at him. in another version of yourself, you'd be running. you'd just get up and go. that's what happens on the internet - people get annoyed, and they just leave. you are locked in place, almost frozen. you need to go to the bathroom and text someone to call you so you have an excuse, like it's rude to just-leave. like he already kind of owns you. rudeness implies a power paradigm, though. see, even your social anxiety allows the patriarchy to get to you.
you take a sip of the new glass of wine. maybe this will be a funny story. maybe you can write about it on your blog. maybe you can meet ariana grande and ask her if she just maybe needs to take some time to sit and think about her happiness and how she measures her own success.
is this settling down? is this all that's left in your dating pool? just accepting that someone will eventually love you, and you have to stop being picky about who "makes" you a wife?
you look down to your hand, clutching the knife.
#writeblr#this is a mashup of like 3 dates i accidentally went on lol#by that i mean that i was out with a woman on a date in 2 of these situations#and a man just. joined us. and we were too awkward to say anything while he tried to ''date'' me#& one was a longterm friend that i was like. you what????#like he's nice he's a doctor and my mom was SO happy she was like raquel think about it#''it's a perfect love story you grew up together and reconnected as adults and like the same things and he's friends with ur brother#and his sister is one of ur close friends!!!''#yes but alas. he is a boy . she only likes girls. can i make it any more obvious#anyway im tryna write about like the force of male attention being actually incredibly ingrained to women like we are SUPPOSED to like it#it's seen as the only important thing#even if ur gay#and it's a nuanced thing idk#and while rn i i.d. as lesbian#like .... it wouldn't be UNTRUE to say i am probably like ''cusp bisexual'' bc i CAN experience attraction to men bc like .#sexuality is fluid...#don't tell straight ppl tho bc they do not understand the concept that ppl don't necessarily need a solid everlasting label#they're like GET in the BOX#if ur gay & in boston i'm 30 and pretty please come kiss me.#(i usually only date older ppl sorry in advance tho)
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I think you might have been a father to me, once.
You used to be more than just another man who hurt me in my life.
Reference pic!
#can you imagine coming to terms with the fact that the one who hurt you might have also been a human?#can you imagine even a monster having their good moments? as fleeting as they might have been?#do those moments even matter? they happened- they were real- but they donât outweight the pain they caused in contrast#DO YOU THINK STANLEY STILL REMEMBERS FILBRICK AS HIS FATHER???#humanizing abusers is such an interesting concept to me#not a fun one- but interesting#it doesnât rectify or even justify any of the things theyâve done to their victims#it doesnât change anything at all- it doesnât necessarily make us feel pity- understanding- or forgiveness towards the abuser#it might even just make us feel worse about them#but it levels the playing field#that despite both victim and abuser being human- the abuser actively chose to act they way they did#no one was forcing them to inflict pain#it was a conscious choice to make another feel less than human- while]st stripping themselves of their humanity at the same time#they chose to be worse than they had to be#they experienced the same joy- pain- love- and hate as the victims. they shared those feeelings and experiences with the victims#they were human#but it doesnât really change anything#my art#art#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart#filbrick pines#stanley pines#gravity falls stanley#stan pines#artists on tumblr
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Comfortable in New Skin
#wanted to give loop some like... vague clothes. since while they dont Need to be covered... accessorising is a human right#and boy do they need some of those. one can assume the only place theyd be getting clothes is isa though. so. ponder it#in stars and time#isat fanart#isat spoilers#isat loop#loop isat#isat#lucabyteart#SPOILERS TAG BECAUSE UM. CAPTION IS UNNEGOTIABLE. SOZ#anyway i do have Even More doodles on the way. primarily about loop. predictable. a lot of thoughts on the body horror of it all.#if you were to ask me. i think loops quote unquote skin is uncannily loose when pushed or pulled in any way#almost as if it were clothes covering the skin rather than skin itself. probably feels fuzzy and vague too. as for their head?#non-solid but in the way where theres a force pushing outwards. radiating you could say. yknow. vague. undefined. not quite real#but thats just my headcanon. tee hee
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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Palestinian freedom fighters breaking out of Gaza and reclaiming their occupied territories. Theyâve taken over israeli tanks and have chased out the settlers that were on that land. Theyâve launched rockets everywhere and the iron dome has failed to intercept. This is about to mark a momentous event in history.
From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free.
#free palestine#it feels so surreal and so shocking#thereâs so much hope but so much fear#you just know theyâre about to retaliate with the genocide theyâve been planning for years now#i fear for my palestinian brothers and sisters but this is so fucking huge#they tore down part of the barbed wire fence!!!! the people of Gaza are breaking out!!!!#god thereâs so much more on twitter but i beg if you look do NOT look at non-palestinian sources#theyâre twisting the narrative as if this isnât retaliation for 76 years of torture#as if the israeli forces and settlers didnât kill 4 palestinians yesterday alone#as if they havenât killed nearly 300 palestinians this year alone#do NOT let the media trick you into thinking anything after will be a retaliation to an attack Palestine started#PALESTINE is the one retaliating#also if youâre gonna come in here with both sides or whatever sincerely block me and lmk so i can blokc you#theyâve already out out statements to leave children and the elderly alone so any middle aged fuckers are free to kill :)#which is fine since theyâve likely killed hundreds if not thousands of their friends and family and neighbors anyway#tag: important#fuck israel#gaza#tag: october 7 2023
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Had an idea a while ago, and thought Obi-Wan fit the bill, His woefully wonderful sleep time (on shore leave as well!) was ruined by some type of antics, likely Ahsoka or Anakin shaped
#hes getting too old for this#hes not even 40 yet and yet#yet the Force blesses him with interrupted sleep#the one time he is getting Good Sleep#(shore leave was a blessing in disguise; the blessing was cody making him not do any work)#(they agreed they would prevent each other from being hypocrites during leave)#(that and anakin was getting worried about how much sleep Obi-Wan was getting)#(unfortunately Situations came to Obi-Wan's door#he isn't happy about it#notably#this is codywan centric to me as the artist but it can be whatever you want forever#anyway it gets the codywan tag bc cody is in that room knocked out cold (they both needed the sleep...bad)#codywan#kraftykelpie's art#wars in the stars#star wars#obi wan kenobi
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How's that possible? Since when did you start eating spicy food? I told you I'd do it for real next time. ...Don't touch me, orâI'll kill you!
KISEKI: DEAR TO ME Ep. 12
#kiseki: dear to me#kisekiedit#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#ai di x chen yi#chen yi x ai di#nat chen#chen bowen#louis chiang#chiang tien#jiang dian#uservid#userspicy#userrain#userspring#pdribs#userjjessi#*cajedit#*gif#chen yi is really sitting there the whole time with only one thought in his mind and it is: i am gonna kiss this man. and then he does!!#okay but heres where i gotta get analytical about it bc ppl will say blah blah theyre so good at miscommunication and im sorry but NO#THEY ARE THE OPPOSITE. when ai di runs away at the end of ep10 after chen yi says he's figured it out and next time he'll do it for real-#chen yi does not seek ai di out Once after that nor does he try to force him into any admissions. HONESTLY HE DOESNT SINCE THE EP10 BAR#he LETS AI DI COME TO HIM EVERY. TIME. he lies a little to keep ai di from running but he doesnt ever actually force ai di to return to him#any time AFTER he CONFIRMS ai di has real feelings for him-which he does during the bar scene. there was no miscommunication there#it was only listening and observing. and chen yi doesnt push farther than offering gifts or that little lie because he wants ai di -#All of ai di. the truest parts of ai di.... he wants the REAL AI DI the one he knows and loves - to come to him of his own volition#in Whatever Form That May Be. because he loves him!! & in this case the form is in torture and accusations bc chen yi's lie has been caught#but chen yi is nothing less than DELIGHTED. bc AI DI STILL CAME. its further proof of ai di's feelings for him and chen yi loves it#& now it's chen yi's turn to show ai di all the ways in which he loves and belongs to him. its time to play his hand after waiting so long
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So god created us in his image, right? And thatâs cool and all but what if it turns out god, like, hates his own image??? What then????
#Yeah okay#I donât even like this as much anymore#But whatever#He makes me insaneeeeer#literally nuts#Bg text is just a snippet from paradise lost because I thought it would look neat and like. Idk biblical symbolism ig#Whateverrrrrrr#How do you think he feels abt humans having red blood. Like.#Okay I know that with Jack he was really big on it#Like excited#But Jack was just some other guy who happened to have red blood#He created us and he created us wrong#And it just so happens we also have his fucked up awful mutant blood color?#Yeah okay sure#Itâs gotta feel like one last slap in the face in the cosmic joke that is his existence#It is inescapable!!! You flow through their very being!!! You are a cancerous presence that has invaded their very veins!!!!#You are the force that keeps them alive as well as the thing that kills them in the end!#Does this make any sense actually. Let me know#Anyway yeah thatâs all#Byeeeee#i might draw more Erivris later but idkkkkkkk#My ipad is getting replaced soon so I wonât have to steal my brotherâs to draw anymore#So hopefully more art then#okayyyy bye 4real this time#homestuck#homestuck fanart#karkat vantas#homestuck karkat#art#digital art
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green apple flavor
#library of ruina#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#lobotomy corp spoilers#lobcorp spoilers#couldnt help it. the box. the meltdownerr (going though severe mental agony manifesting in a form bursting forth from metal)#i have ao mant sketches... i havent finished.... lor angela floor of lit drawinfs.... but my motivation is ASS and most of what ive made#recently also feels like shit. mind empty doodles w netz to try and get myself out of the gutter#.... murky. gutter wky dont ask me w#trying to find time... ahhhh the time. the TIME .#anyways. netz :)#actually i forgot to tag him#Netzach#netzach lor#netzach lobotomy corporation#netzach lobcorp#covers it i think. yippee wahoo aghhbvabnamkpeiu#right giovanni too o guess. hey king. itty bitty tiny one. littlr guy.#the goodbye tender one was just because i was listening to it and dongdang kills the cover per normal#i really love fragment of the universe. one of my favorite abnos. i got it on day 6 ish in lobcorp. its not hostile or meaning to cause harm#it wishes to communicate and to be heard to to share knowledge and thoughts. yet it is also persistsnt and insistent to communicate the#whole of it. wanting the other to know and learn the entirety of it. to be heard and understood in full. the ways of doing so is forceful#and causes harm. which then causes a dynamic of it wishing to have full knowledge and understanding while the other party rightfully shuts#it out and refuses to listen. in the ego and in lor mentioning ignoring it and not paying it any mind. even though it trys to go out of its#way to communicate itself as friendly and around ideas of joy such as a childs scribble of hearts. plus with the sounds of something akin to#a whale iirc. then tying together with the line of singing and song. i love u fragment of the universe
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There have been several things in my everyday life that i have just, "decided to not let bother me". And that seemed to work really well for me. Like, well if i can't seem to change that then i guess i'll just accept the fact that i'm a person whose life is like that, and be at peace with it.
years later i'm finding out that while i thought i was not letting it bother me, what i was actually doing was ignoring that it was bothering me the whole time. And, wow, are those two things different.
#in the long term. but they feel so similar in the short term#like in the moment they both feel like you don't care about it anymore with some relief and an ability to focus on other things in your lif#but when that thing runs its whole orbit out in the dark and arrives back in the center of your attention later in life#it arrives with the full force of the decade or two you've been walking with that particular pebble in your shoe#and you find yourself thinking âi'd rather chew my own foot off than have to take one more step onto that little fucking rock again istfgâ#made all the worse by the fact you've not given yourself any compassion or accommodation about it#like you haven't said to yourself it's okay you walked less miles than you needed to walk today - after all you have a pebble in your shoe#and you haven't used a cane or taken foot-resting breaks or anything in fact you've just been doing your best to not even limp#so instead of not letting the pebble bother me i've just been doing things in a way in the way guaranteed to make the pebble bother me most#and i think i've got like#several miscellaneous shoe bits going on down there smh
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can you please, please relate? iâm not holding up
[transcript]
#the one without a custom voicemail is asa :')#i always write casper posts when i'm mentally unwell đ but now i'm doing okay overall so reading this again makes me feel.......#almost like i'm oversharing somehow#and i get embarrassed#but i guess that's kind of the point#it wouldn't be mental illness if it made me feel good lmaooo#also i'm forcing myself not to proofread this at all because i don't want to get caught up in the cycle like i always do#so if there are any mistakes sorryyyyyy you can think of me as a semi-retired storyteller#frozen pines#camellia#casper birkshaw#tom connelly
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I cannot stand the discussion over 'Christmas stealing from pagans' every God damn year. I'm not Christian anymore but I celebrate the holiday with my family because they are and I love them and I find feast days with lots of singing fun.
Some moron is insisting that "well actually you're celebrating Yuuuule"
No idiot I'm inside a fucking Christian church singing songs about baby Jesus with my dad and addressing gifts from Saint Nicholas I am not celebrating fucking Yule. I know what I'm doing. If Jesus is mad at me for coming to his birthday party when I don't plan to hand my soul to him he can come down and stop me his fucking self I am watching The Grinch.
#when i became pagan jesus became just another face in a lineup of dozens of gods#im not scandalized by celebrating one of his holidays any more than id be upset being invited to a wiccan celebration#and im not wiccan either#the stupid part is its other pagans insisting i cant celebrate christmas and not even the christians this time#the christians want to force it on me and the pagans want to take it away#neither of them consider that i do what i want with my own religion
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