#then I can get a normal person job | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dix-rose · 2 months ago

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anticipatory grief is actually one of the worst things in the world I hope nobody ever has to deal with it

#stupid shit #this is actually more of an anxiety thing but whatever I'm having an episode rn #I have a job interview tomorrow for a job that if I get it will essentially be taking up my nights and weekends #and that's kinda the way it has to be for the next year and a half and I'm trying to learn to just accept it #until I graduate #then I can get a normal person job #and I was fine up until about an hour or so ago #thinking about how I'm not going to be seeing my mom as much #and my mom is a very touchy subject for some reason to me #her medicine is working fine *knock on wood*#but I still feel this sense of overwhelming guilt #like I'm doing something absolutely horrible by leaving her #I constantly feel like the second I'm not within the same building as her she's going to just die #and I know I just need to do this #But I'm just having a really hard time thinking about leaving her #In my head it tells me i'm essentially leaving my mom for a year and a half maybe even more depending on how quickly I can get a new job #after graduation #so we're not party rocking

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sergle · 5 months ago

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yall are about to piss me off by not having any PASSING basic knowledge of the way the u.s. military manipulates its recruits into joining by typing up one of your uninformed, unresearched, unempathetic, individualistic, unbelievably annoying posts about how 100% of the people in the military ended up there because they just Love America So Damn Much! they're extremely mature and informed at time of recruitment, they can totally leave anytime they want, they totally had tons of other avenues in life they could've taken, there was no rush at all to get income as fast as possible, and everyone in the military also totally is part of the combat divisions and personally enjoys being IN the military very much, big believers of violence. everyone in the military is shooting guns all day, that's how that works. they LOVE BLOODSHED. also I love the "amewicans haha" twang to this type of shit because you're actually TOTALLY stealing our Thing, which is turning systemic issues into Individual Issues. Instead of talking about the powers that be, it's so Personal Choice up in here. It's, "well you shouldn't have done it then. I totally wouldn't because I know better." you don't wanna talk about the military industrial complex as a whole, and you don't want to talk about recruiters, you just want to pin the blame on Specific Individual People one-by-one, as if they're responsible for the system that they're being ground up in. someone was in the military? bad person, no matter what. it's easier to believe that, I guess, than to acknowledge that Normal People (with high school educations) are manipulated and incentivized into joining a system that is Bad. at like age 18. but yeah no that 18 year old should have just been smarter lol haha anyway here are some screenshots for no particular reason

side note this reply of someone going "umm just get loans and go into a high paying field it's easy XD" as a direct response to someone trying to explain how most americans joining the military are being funneled in that direction out of a need for money.

and another person who Decided that americans join the military just CLENCHING their teeth thinking of other people, and not thinking completely selfishly about their own selves and their own income/housing/healthcare.

#I had a longer post w more bullshit in it but ukw nobody's even gonna read THIS one. so.#dumb ass cunts seriously LMAO just the individualism of it all....#we're all just selectively forgetting that most people join the military straight out of high school / after failing to kickstart #their lives so they don't know shit yet and they are categorically not educated and don't have money #you NEED money and have been groomed by recruiters ALREADY into believing this is #The Best and Only to make a survivable amount of money without a college education-- bc they can't afford college btw #and they don't want to take on student debt either bc everyone already knows what a big fuckeroo that is #recruiters WILL DO ANYTHING TO GET YOU TO JOIN. they will KEEP CALLING YOU. they'll answer your questions #to make it sound like this is going to be a GREAT life decision. you can get all KINDS of jobs (true)#they love to say the thing about how only about 15% of the military will actually see combat in any way #they love to list all the jobs where you will literally just be working at an office or a pharmacy or in tech etc etc etc #the recruiters are offering housing healthcare steady pay and BONUSES if you sign on for longer.#so you let your guard down because you were so scared of the actual fighting. BECAUSE YOU'RE 18 IN THIS SCENARIO BTW.#you cunts will not meet anyone who hates the military as much as people who are NOW DONE working in the military #you don't know enough when they get you and then either you stay placated by the benefits or you scramble away as fast as possible #the number one military haters are people who know what goes on bc they already did it #source: I LIVE NEXT TO A MILITARY BASE LMAO PEOPLE HATE IT HERE!! they are NORMAL PEOPLE #I need you to get it into your head that the people committing atrocities in war were NORMAL when they joined #and that for every person in the military who's actively shedding blood there's 20 who do PAPERWORK #and they both are being put in the same category by you!! and they are BOTH being controlled by the same system!!#sergle.txt #I hate yall I really do.

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screechingfromthevoid · 2 months ago

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So like they've been talking a lot about how they're all a bunch of fuck ups. And while sure they're all a little unstable and unpredictable, I don't really think they are fuck ups? Outcasts sure. People who have had a lot of bad shit happen to them? Yeah. People who have made mistakes? Who hasn't.

Like Laudna didn't really fuck up. She had the worst things imaginable happen to her, then was given exactly 0 time to heal. All the while she was being manipulated by someone who was supposed to "care" for her.

Imogen was neglected by her father and ostracized by her town and honestly came out as normal as she probably could have. When she was out on her own, with Laudna, they seemed to do pretty well?? It's just, being the leader of a group is new to her. It takes a while to adjust.

Ashton was used as a science experiment by their cult leader father. Then was dropped in the middle of nowhere where they found a family that didn't love them as much as they loved them. They had to make a lot of hard decisions on their own and just because they're not lawful good decisions doesn't mean they were wrong or bad.

Fearne being classified as a fuck up because did meet her warlord fathers expectations is crazy to me. (I know what they were getting at by calling her a disappointment. Doesn't mean I have to like it) On top of that, she had years stolen from her as a price for her parents actions.

FCG was programmed a certain way and they fought against it at every point they could. Their literal programming. Being taken over by something hardwired into I don't think counts as fucking up?

Braius was lied to then excommunicated. it seems like letting Nott and Jester in was like the only thing he did wrong his entire life?? He was hella devout before that??

Chetney is 4,000 years old and fucked his way through exandria. He doesn't have a family to disappoint and hes been making children's favorite toys for like ever. He hurt some people along the way but like. Does that constitute as being a fuck up?

Dorian literally did what he was supposed to do. His parents had a rumspringa and to imply that he's a fuck up for literally doing a rite of passage is beyond me. (If you wanna talk about fuck ups ask me about Cyrus) And even on his rumspringa he became one of exandrias greatest hopes.

And Orym. His insisting incident? The thing that set him in this course? His husband and father dying. In the same battle that he fought in. That's the thing he "fucked up" on. Failing to save those closest to him. And idk I think it's pretty cruel to call him a fuck up for not being able to save them against Otoha. Who also killed him.

#silver sending stones #i know they probably mean by their 🤗wacky🤗 personalities #and they have done things that tear apart trust within themselves #but i can really only think of a few things that they REALLY fucked up on #sure theyre not great at confrontation or subtly and the play they put on made me want to tear my hair out #but being fuck ups. i think. has more implications and more repeated behavior than what we've seen from the group as a whole #they are not the most under qualified people to be doing this.#was it matt or brennan that said that normal people are lvl 1s their entire lives and the oldest wisest wizard in a village might be like #lvl 6? and bells hells are lvl 14??#and sure there are people stronger than them. but theyre all SO young. all the lvl 20s they know are grey or greying #or immortal adjacent #idk. they're not tactful. but they get their jobs done #bells hells #orym of the air ashari #dorian storm #imogen temult #cr laudna #ashton greymoore #fearne calloway #chetney pock o'pea #fcg critical role #braius doomseed #cr 3 #cr 3 spoilers #ive seen #cr 3 108

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hephaestuscrew · 1 year ago

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I think one of the things that I find so compelling about Minkowski & Eiffel is that I believe that who they each are as people means they have the inherent potential to have immensely positive impacts on each other, but I do not believe they would have even been friends in most possible scenarios in which they could have met. I believe they are uniquely attuned to help each other grow and develop and become better versions of themselves, but for the first year and a half of them living and working together, the prevailing emotion between them was irritation. I believe that they are able to support each other through hardship in a way no one else could, but without the specific kind of hardship they went through, they might never have known this.

And even as I acknowledge that they might never have bonded without the trauma, it's important to me that it's not that they are bonded purely by trauma, in a way that might imply Minkowski or Eiffel could have built the same bond with anyone who'd been up there with them.

They are bonded by the ways in which they care for each other, by the ways in which their contrasting personalities make them uniquely well suited to support each other, by the way Eiffel makes Minkowski laugh when she really needs to, by the way Minkowski would do anything to keep Eiffel safe, by the way Eiffel reminds Minkowski of her moral compass in her darkest moments, by the way Minkowski helps Eiffel understand that some things are worth taking seriously.

But without what they went through together, they might never have seen beyond their surface-level understandings of each other in order to form this incredibly valuable friendship. It's not that their traumatic experiences are all that bond them. It's that the traumatic experiences forced them to break past the initial barriers that prevented them from connecting with each other properly and from trying to understand each other, in order to realise the potential for connection that had always been there.

#Wolf 359 #w359 #Doug Eiffel #Renée Minkowski #Renee Minkowski #This is true to a lesser extent of some other Wolf 359 dynamics #like Minkowski & Hera #and maybe Minkowski & Lovelace #whereas I kind of think that at least personality-wise Eiffel and Hera would vibe together in most potential circumstances #although obviously other circumstances in which Eiffel and Hera would be able to meet and get to know each other are potentially limited #and in other circumstances they might not understand each other as well as they do in canon #Back in the day I did read a fair few AU fics for Wolf #and they can be fun #but this is a plausibility issue with them for my understanding of the show now #like if Eiffel was Minkowski's college roommate #or her co-worker at a more normal job #it saddens me to say that I don't think they would be friends #and if they aren't friends what's even the point #the empty man posteth #I am still writing that DSSPPM essay btw. I'm just also always thinking about this #Some of this is frankensteined from a longer post I had in my drafts #that I started writing ages ago in response to people saying the Hephaestus crew aren't found family cos they are just trauma bonded #Explaining my argument in response to that is tricky #They wouldn't have formed those connections without the trauma #but the connections aren't *about* the trauma #They're about each other #Eiffel & Minkowski

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burningfaith · 3 months ago

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next month me and my grandma are going to visit my godfather who lives in Spain, but instead of being excited (it's gonna be my second time abroad in my life) I'm anxious af, because even though I'm an adult I live with my parents and I need to tell my father about it. normal parents would - y'know - be happy that their children have opportunity to visit another country, but instead he's gonna be insufferable about it, because it's my mom's side of family and he despises my uncle. but what is he gonna do? kick me out of the house even though he promised that as long as I'm studying or working I don't need to worry about such thing, humiliate me as usual, tell me that I'm childish and spoiled or make my mom's life a living hell again? I'm aware of the fact that the longer I'm putting it off the worse his reaction is gonna be, but I'm just not mentally able to tell him that, because I don't know how he will react. I don't need any money from him, I don't have to use my phone during this trip (I dunno how the roaming and stuff work), I just want to be sure he's gonna behave like a proper human being towards my mom and my siblings when I won't be at home and not act like a total asshole while talking with me about it.

#i know that at my age i should be more mature and handle such situations better but as long as he's the way he is it's impossible #why can't both my parents be normal #and the fact that i wasn't able to get any summer job this year isn't making it any better because i know it's gonna be one of his argument #(czaicie to że nawet do żabki mnie nie chcieli. dosłownie emotional i brain damage)#'you didn't work so from where do you get the money for that'#don't worry definitely not from you because you can't even pay for my monthly train ticket to college #and at the same time have the audacity to call me dumb for commuting there instead of living in that city #while knowing that neither me nor mom can afford renting anything without your help #(okay i'm a bit exaggerating in my mom's case but she earns much less than him and he still makes problems with literally anything #even buying food even though he's in a very good financial situation and there are times when my mom has to make everything work all alone #because he's getting mad at her out of nowhere and only pays the bills that fortunately aren't that bad in our case)#(and unfortunately the bills include my telephone subscribtion because all of our numbers are in some kind of special offer where you pay #much less for one number when they're registered for one person so it's another problem in this situation because when i offered paying for #mine he refused and probably it'll be his another argument for becoming mad that i dare to spend time with the part of family that cares #about me unlike majority of his relatives)#i hope that at least when academic year starts i'll be able to get any part-time job on the weekends so i can save up more money #although i'm not sure if i'm gonna move out in the nearest future. i mean he's fucking insufferable and toxic but i just can't leave my mom #and especially siblings there even though i can't even fucking protect them from literally anything. at this point i'm just powerless.#there are times when he tries to change for the better but then he starts creating problems on purpose and everything is coming full circle #and the sole thought that my little siblings would tell me that i just ran away from this problem is fucking killing me.#niedziela wieczór i humor niegituwa. zawsze kurwa kurwa coś.#chuj idę słuchać myslovitz #pau.txt

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pardonmydelays · 6 months ago

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my job makes me want to kill myself but maybe spending all my money on theatre tickets is the way

#i am literally so damn tired #and also mad at everything idk #i'm tired of living alone & having basically no friends here #because most of my friends live so far from me we are seeing each other like once a year #my only friend who lives near me doesn't really get me most of the time #the only thing we can do together is to go for a walk once in a while or go see a movie #i literally cannot find a normal job with normal boss who's not a fucking asshole #all my coworkers look at me like i'm crazy when i say i don't go to the clubs because i'm not that kind of person #what the fuck is wrong with people really i am so damn tired maybe i should just come back home and live with my parents #for the rest of my life #and finally admit that i fucking failed #i say whatever and whatever that i want*

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carcarrot · 7 days ago

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having another one of my job-related crises

#where are the jobs for blokes that do fuck all. where are they!!!!!!!#i am quite literally looking for jobs where you do nothing. you do not understand how much i dont want to do anything #granted my current job has a certain amount of doing nothing in that i have the time to look for jobs where i do nothing #but i want to do even more nothing. do you understand #if i lived on my own i probably would consider some weird night shift job #but its probably better i have the routine i have living during the day like a normal person #despite the drawbacks of my cursed routine #where are those jobs i see people making tiktoks about where you do fuck all in the office and send like one email a day. id kill for that #my dream is to be paid for like. mostly sitting somewhere where i can work on my needlepoint #id even do mindless data entry. PLEASE pay me for mindless data entry i love repetitive tasks. if you let me listen to music im unstoppable #ive come across a couple data entry jobs but i think they always require a college degree #and its like oops sorry i never had the time or money for that! still dont! however i can promise you my autism is qualification enough #my dad talks about the market research jobs he used to have and how for like the entry level jobs there #there was clearly so much goof off time they were playing early computer games and shit #but there were like so much more data entry jobs that i guess are obsolete now bc of technology #and its like yes technology good but theyve destroyed an important job category: jobs where you do fuck all #whenever i have one of these crises i also check out gigs n jobs on craigslist and unfortunately everything there seems so sketchy #like every 'personal assistant' job sounds either super pervy or like im going to get serial killed #i should get paid a million dollars a year for doing nothing at all i think #anyway once again my only option is my successful director dreams. would be great if theyd actually happen #<- guy that doesnt spend enough time actually working on creative works in progress #well anyway. such is my mental state today thank you for your time

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dreamlogic · 5 months ago

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i have no clue what's going on w/ the hiring process for the job offer i got yesterday, but at least it seems like nobody at the post office does either. 🙃

#ctxt #charlie vs mail #got a call from some guy at the regional sorting facility like 'uuh yeah just drop in to your PO whenever for fingerprinting'#so i show up in shorts & a t-shirt as a stop along a multi-errand trip bc my impression was that this is just a part of the background check #woman doing my prints was like 'idk if anyone's here to speak with you today but we can check'#me still thinkin it's just a casual meet/greet 'oh no worries haha! btw i got the job offer before having even 1 interview is that normal?'#she doesn't know but leads me around until we find someone buried under a stack of paperwork at her desk #'hi [redacted!] charlie is here for their interview!'#redacted peers over his monitor like a deer in headlights 'who is here for their what now??? oh uuuhh gimme a minute uuuhhhhh'#i'm sweatinnnmng like i'm wearing my birks i am massively underprepared but ok i guess we're doing this & they already offered me the job so #redacted also seemed to be panicking a lil bc the person who usually does these interviews isn't even in today #we had a moment of 'so we're both utterly blindsided here right?' 'yeah can we reschedule?' 'yes god please let's reschedule'#so i'm going back thursday for an actual interview. after already completing background check & filling out tax paperwork #get home to an email from the dude who called me this morning like 'btw dress business casual for your fingerprinting & bring XYZ'#but still stating nowhere that the implication was that fingerprinting & interview would happen concurrently????#this is a federal institution & the second largest employer in the US. get ur shit together !!!#hoping it's not gonna be a black mark that i showed up in my casual summer clothes without the necessary docs #but tbf to me the expectations were hella unclear like i wasn't even given a point of contact for an onboarding supervisor until today #since they were also drastically underprepared i hope it'll just be water under the bridge & we can properly meet thursday #hands down weirdest hiring/onboarding process i've ever gone through but fuck it we ball

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hanzajesthanza · 3 months ago

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Bez krwi nie ma wampira. Jest to substancja, która decyduje o jego istnieniu, podobnie jak o istnieniu człowieka. Without blood there is no vampire. It is this substance which determines his existence, just as it does the existence of a human.

Maria Janion. "6. Krew i ciało," in Wampir: Biografia symboliczna. ("6. Blood and body," in Vampire: A Symbolic Biography.)

#also 'bez krwi nie ma wszak zabawy' :)#emiel regis #he's not even mentioned in the analysis from what ive read he's only in the excerpt from chrzest ognia at the end. but #1. this is a witcher blog 2. i post what i want 3. this belongs in his tag does it not #wampir biografia symboliczna #but i am liking what ive read of it (via google translate camera haha)#after hunting for regis' name i went back and just read like a normal person #i like reading the analysis of interview with the vampire because then i can glean insights without having to read it #(sorry all iwtv fans it's just not appealing to me but i know its part of ~the canon~ so i should but :p i haven't wanted to)#it's just like you know like lolita or american psycho where the point is 'the protagonist is absolutely a horrible person'#i never claimed to be a voracious reader i only ever claimed to be a witcher fan <3 #speaking of though love that janion subtitled the ChO excerpt at the end 'rozmowa z wampirem'#funnily enough i learned the words wywiad and rozmowa from reading AS zone :p #like it's the interview with the...... i mean... a conversation with a... vampire #insert that tumblr post 'so did that vampire ever get the job or what'#with regis in baptism of fire... it's not an interview because no one even asked him #'we don't need your life story regis' 'i'm going to tell you my life story'#he traumadumps exactly like i would expect a middle aged man to

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barry-j-blupjeans · 1 year ago

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TAZ NC Day 9: Your Job AU

@taznovembercelebration

Look. Look. The chances of running into someone else who knew magic were very, very small. Lup understood that. Magic, while great, tended to be isolating. She was incredibly lucky to have Taako. Lup couldn't imagine what it was like to grow up not knowing what was wrong with you— maybe not ever knowing there wasn't anything wrong with you. If it hadn't been for their tía, Lup wasn't sure if she would have ever accepted that part of herself.

Yes, magic was rare. Yes, it wasn't typically used in public.

And yes, she was ninety-nine percent sure that this Office Depot employee was magic.

It was just— okay maybe Lup was biased in her belief that you had to be a little magic to be able to work retail. Like, there was no way anyone was getting through that shit with no magic whatsoever. But Lup had been here for exactly ten minutes while Magnus went around looking for a new desk and there was definitely some kind of magic here.

The employee at the print counter had been doing nothing but sorting paper since she got here. Maybe it was a slow day, because while Lup wasn't sure what the print center did, it was probably more than just sorting papers. But this guy had been at it for ten minutes straight, easily separating different types of paper (which all looked the same!) into several different piles. It was getting ridiculous at this point. He was barely even looking at the paper while he did this. There had to be some kind of tomfuckery going on.

Lup looked over her shoulder. There was a lady further into the store browsing through different file folders and she could barely see the top of Magnus's head over the shelves, looking at the desk displays in the back. With the coast clear, she made her way over to the print counter, leaning up against it. The employee had ducked under the counter a second ago, a stack of paper in his hands.

When he rose back up, he jumped slightly upon seeing her and said,

"Oh shi—" He coughed, cutting himself off. His name tag was shiny and had a skull sticker (?) attached to it. It read, Barry and then, on the line below it, I love printing banners! "How, uh— how can I help you?"

"Do you really love printing banners?" Lup asked, instead of the magic-related words she wanted to say.

Barry's eyebrows raised a little. "Love it," he said. Lup gave him a look. "Yeah, nah. I— banners suck. Unless you want to get a banner—?"

"I'm good," Lup said, not knowing what she would even use a banner for right now. "I was just— I came with my friend to look at desks but that's super fuckin' boring—" Barry nodded. "— so I've just kinda been walking around."

If Barry had seen here crouching behind the boxes of paper and staring at her, he didn't say anything.

"And then I was wondering what, uh— what kinda paper options you have. Forrrrr. Printing. On papers."

Lup was so good at this. Barry's lips quirked up into a little smile.

"Depends on what you're wanting to print," he said.

"Forms? No. Photo…graphs. Photographs."

"Well," Barry said, wisely choosing to not question the mess that Lup had just made with her mouth. "Usually for photographs, we've got, uhm— glossier options? Hang on." He ducked back under the counter and returned a second later with two pieces of very shiny paper. "Eight point," he said, handing her one. "Ten point." He handed her the other.

These were the same paper. These were a hundred percent the same paper. If Lup had doubted her reasoning before, she knew now. Either this guy was fucking with her or he had wizardly magics to tell them apart.

"What's, uh, what's the difference?"

"This one's thicker," Barry said, pointing to the ten point.

It wasn't. It really wasn't. Lup weighed them in her hands. There had to be some kinda spell to tell the difference, right? Or maybe this guy was just magically attuned to paper? That was probably a thing that happened. Probably. Like Merle's thing with plants.

Actually, Lup really, really hoped it wasn't like Merle's thing with plants.

"It's hard to tell," Barry said comfortingly in Lup's silence.

"I can tell," Lup said, like a liar. She had to let this guy know she was in on the secret somehow. But he didn't seem to pick up on it. Or, if he did, it was hidden behind the customer service mask. This was getting her nowhere. But she couldn't just straight up ask this guy if he had magic. That'd be weird.

"So, uh, do you have a prefe—"

"Are you magic," Lup interrupted.

"Am I… magic?" Barry repeated.

Lup looked over her shoulder, toward the desk displays. Magnus was currently with another employee, showing them a picture of something on his phone. Probably his dogs. Or his office, if he had managed to stay on track. Lup looked back to Barry and set the papers down. She held out her hand and summoned a flame.

"Ah." Lup wasn't good at reading people, but there was something in Barry's expression that made her think he understood. Or maybe it was the customer service mask again. "That is— that's a fire hazard, ma'am."

#taz november celebration #taz nc #lup #barry bluejeans #taz #taz balance #inspired by the several customers who have asked me if I'm magic just for being able to tell apart paper types #which i get. like. i know a Normal person usually cannot tell the difference between 65 and 110 cardstock but #it Is my job to know and feel the difference sldfksfd #this was fun !#ise cube writing #mine #retail employees can have a lil magic. as a treat.

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thedreadvampy · 4 months ago

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anyway this week I leant on my therapist's shoulder and ugly cried for like 10 minutes and as I was leaving I was like 'don't give me that face' and she was like 'I'm just very proud of your progress!' and I'm like 😡😡😡😡😡 THANK YOU 😡😡😡😡😡

#red said #i have cried in therapy before but i am usually always very in control of it #it's a 'tears are running but I'm otherwise normal' kind of crying or occasionally a 'take several deep breaths to pull myself together'#but it's dumb though cause we've talked about some very dramatic shit just fine and today i was just talking about like #my dumb adolescent-type insecurities about not being the kind of Cool And Collected And Exciting Person i want to be #ooooorrrrrr from another angle about how I'm 31 and have built my entire self-conception around being a person Things Happen to #and now at 31 entire years old I'm suddenly trying to figure out what sort of person i am beyond someone who's like #good at being tough and reacting with grace and fortitude to Things Happening At Me.#because Things stopped Happening At Me so much like. 5 years ago now. I'm in a loving relationship i have a stable home #i have a middle class income and great friends and it's been over 6 years since the last time anyone raped me.#my health is better than its ever been. both physical and mental. i am safe and i am loved and i am good at my job #so i can't really keep operating on a self concept where the only thing that i value in myself is the ability to survive #bc like I'm NOT surviving I'm GOOD. i can get what i want and be who i want. what the FUCK do i WANT??????????????

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goldenpinof · 4 months ago

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