#the stuff in grey im not gonna worry about for now

[bf-rally]

im getting ready to start the database setup 🫡

[suguru-getos]

୨・┈﹕✦﹕ Kinktober Day 8﹕✦﹕┈・୧

Hawks x f!reader -> Cockwarming

Event Masterlist

a/n: soft hawksie, comfort, slice of life <3, cockwarmin.

there are times your work, your day absolutely drains the fuck out of you. you want nothing more than keigo and to be covered in the duvet of his wings. today you were late from work, reaching home at 10 pm. it was irritating— you were drained and your shoulders were slumped, keigo noticed the lack of ease and effortlessness in your body language and facial expressions in the morning itself. a sudden murmur when he wore his hero jacket, “why don’t you take an off from work sweetie? take my card and spoil yourself a bit mm?” keigo tried, but you dismissed his proposal. “no, im good thanks kei” your smile also seemed forced—

now that you had returned home, keigo came over to you immediately. wearing his grey joggers and a white tee. fuck he didn’t even have to try !! he was so ethereal. the blazing sun had toned down in japan & keigo’s golden tan with it. you walked towards him, hugging him eagerly. a musical chuckle escaped him as his hands groped your back, “aww~ my cute little birb.” he mumbles, leaning back and kissing your lips softly, melting away your stress and worries. “dinner?” he muses, tucking a stray strand of your hair behind your ear.

“mhm, what do we have?” you asked him, nuzzling against his palm when he cupped your face. “mm, whatever you want is what we have. keigo’s kitchen especially catered to his baby girl.” he grinned. you love that he addressed himself as keigo and not ‘hawks’ in front of you.

“some chicken soup.” you hummed, smiling back at him tenderly, through tired eyes.

“gotcha~” he took out his phone to check for outlets and you chuckled, “hey now, wasn’t this keigo’s kitchen?” keigo bit his lip, blushing with a grin. “yes it is, just out sourcing some stuff.” he winked, sounding exactly like the man of your dreams — oh wait, he is.

the dinner came in quick, by the time you were out of the shower, a stray plume caressed your cheek, making you giggle as you paved your way towards the dining area. “dinner is ready missy, sit down.” keigo looked at you, still in the bathrobe and whistled. “oh my~” you blushed and rolled your eyes at his antics, sitting down and having dinner with your husband. things seem so great when you start counting these little moments that life awards you with your man.

once the dinner was finished, where you talked to him about work, he talked about his— well, as much as he could share of course. you got up. flustered at what you’re about to ask. “wanna, cockwarm.” the words came out of your mouth easy. keigo smirked, “mm? want to feel daddy that close huh?” you nodded, blushing and looking down.

you nodded, looking into his eyes because you know he likes it. “yeah, wan’- wan’ to feel you close keigo.” you looked down, fuck his siren gaze with his marked golden eyes made you shiver. “and too tired for the whole sex.” you pouted, while keigo observed you in awe.

“mkay, if my sweet little girl wants that, who the hell am i to deny her demands? don’t want to be a bad daddy to my kid.” he winked, carrying you bridal style, a low purr escaping him when you lean against his chest as he took you to your shared bedroom.

“looks like gotta work you up first mm? how else are you gonna take daddy’s cock?” keigo smirked, oh he had no filter at times… you pouted, quite impatient and wanting to feel stretched & full already. after all these years with you, keigo has become an excellent mind reader. “okay okay~ let me get the lube, mm?” he cooed, pulling the knot of your bath suit and kissing your exposed tits. tugging at your nipples just to check how far he could go with them. they get really sensitive depending upon the time of the month & keigo doesn’t want to hurt his darling.

spreading your legs, pupils dilating in anticipation, keigo lubed up your pretty pussy and groaned when you arched your back at him rubbing your clit. “there she is, there she is.” he hums, spreading your cunt lips and thrusting himself in slowly. you arched your back and whined, gasping at the stretch. “fuck— i can’t.” you moaned when keigo pressed your pelvis, making you feel just how deep he’s reaching.

“that’s it sweetness, that’s it. ssh~ you’re taking it so well.” he crooned, kissing your neck and stilling. your eyes were glossing up. overwhelmed by the smouldering amount of love keigo showers you with. “i love you.”

“i love you too.” he said it like a silent prayer, smiling tenderly at you and leaning beside, adjusting your position & kissing your forehead deeply. “cute. my cute little angel birdie.” he smiled, kissing your eyelids. “let it go for me okay? all your worries, all your stress. because i’d always be here.”

and he’ll always be there for you. <3 you don’t doubt that.

[icarusredwings]

Snippet of my one fic series im calling

"Finding home."

This comes after DOG TAGS. They're spending the night at the Xmen mansion when someone pays them a visit. Established Poolverine.

Warning: Wade is just.. Wade. Logan (worst wolverine) is learning to stand up for himself, Complicated stuff with Jean Grey and other xmen characters. Post unknown context.

Angst, emotional hurt/comfort, fluff.

Coming into the room, Logan had found Wade lying down. Sprawled out beautifully like a dame in one of those fancy paintings. As if he was worn out. This had pleased him greatly. It meant he had so much fun that he was satisfied with the level of exercise and socialization for today. Something that was a rare sight.

Walking over, he climbed into the bed with a big smirk, pulling him close, underneath him.

“Hey..”

“Hi.”

He chuckled softly, starting to kiss him all over. The kind of kisses that meant he was hungry for something more, already nipping at his lips and his neck. Putting his head back into the silk pillows Wade groaned, putting his hands up to the back of his head, beginning to pet him.

Sliding his shirt up, It wasn't often that Logan let himself wonder so confidently. Which is why Wade whined, his stomach fluttery a bit as he groaned. Maybe it was because Logan was leaving a trail of nips down his abdomen or maybe it was because of how nauseous he was getting, but something wasn't right.

“Oh god. I usually would never in a billion life times say this but.. Stop?” What ever has gotten into Logan had got him good because he only chuckled again and bit his ear, Holding him by the hem of his jeans. “Sorry, Bub, But you're all mine now. Stuck with me. So get used to it because you're gonna be scr-”

“Logan Stop.”

Almost instantly, Like a switch he sat up, No longer touching him. In Fact the look he gave him was filled with concern and almost ashamed for the things he's done. For not stopping the first time. There've been plenty of times where stop didn't actually mean it, but he knew better when it was said in that tone.

This only made Wade pout more. Look at him!! All confident and ready to play the way they've been training his self confidence for. And the dirty talk too? Come on! How he was sitting like this? All obedient and worried for him? Ugh! He only wanted to fuck him more now. It wasn't fair.

“I'm gonna puke.” He stated a quick explanation that made the man frown, his thoughts instantly going to because of him, as if he were too gross to play with, but a single brain cell pipped up as he remembered his dear fiancé was not new to throwing up.

“If… if you don't mind. Do you think we could just cuddle tonight?” He asked, looking almost ashamed of himself too, feeling bad for turning him away.

“Yes. I mean- Of course… Do you want help?” Watching him light up like a puppy with hope to be helpful.

Wade couldn't help but stifle a laugh, giggling after the scoff. “Can you hand me that trash can? And.. maybe look away. Or something.” He muttered, not liking when people saw him so gross, especially not him. No one wanted to kiss you with vomit in your mouth. Within a few seconds, He fetched the trash can, sitting next to him as he rubbed his back.

“You're alright.” He whispered, reassuring Wade that it was okay, that he could do whatever he needed to do, and no one would be mad at him. Sometimes, he became upset with himself for times like this. Thought it ruined the moment, and past shitty hookups have convinced him it was true and his fault.

This was the opposite of looking away, but no one really wanted to be alone when sick.

“You're burning up…” he mummbled, looking away but kept his hand on him as he hurled, gagging and grunting how much he hated doing this.

Listening to him try to catch his breath was the worst part for him, knowing how sensitive he was to unauthorized breath play and cancer didn't exactly believe in safe words.

“I know.. I know.” It took him about a month to finally get it when he first moved in, that Wade wasn't lean and thin because he wanted to be, Rather, he could barely keep anything down some days.

“It's alright. Hey. You're okay. I got you.” He whispers to him. Wade put his head back, tears in his eyes as he breathed deep and slow.

“There we go. Better?”

Starting to nod, this quickly became a shake of his head, putting his head in that trash can again. Oh, the poor thing…

Opening the door, Logan swallowed as he saw her. “Hey…”

To make matters worse, there was a knock at the door. God, they couldn't catch a break, could they? Without even getting a chance to ask, Wade went off to the bathroom, slamming the door. He always did prefer a toilet, really. It's much easier to throw your guts up when you don't have to worry about holding a bucket full of vomit. Much easier to clean up too, just flush it instead of rinsing it and cleaning it with soap.

“Erm.. Hi?”

“Look.. Logan I- We.. we're sorry. For everything.”

Crossing his arms he looked away, leaning against the door frame. “I don't know what you're talking about.”

“Yes. You very much do. You claim that you're different, but the way you've been acting shows that we even hurt you in your timeline, too. So.. While I don't know what we did then, I want us to be on good terms.”

“Us?” He asked, a little confused, shaking his head a bit. “Jean.. that was a long time ago. And you're not even the same person. I'm not even the same person.”

Blinking, Logan looked outside of the door, as if trying to see if there was anyone else. “I'm sorry- this is bothering me. We?? Who's we?”

“I know.. but that doesn't mean we can't apologize... Maybe start over? We would like that."

“Well.. you know how he can be.”

“Jean, Usually when people apologize, they're in person and say it to their face. Not send their pregnant wife to come confront them by herself.”

A Small look of horror came to her face, as if she hadn't told anyone else yet. A look that said ‘How did you know?’ But she only sighed.

“Only ever what mattered…” His nose crinkled a bit, Able to smell it. She wasn't far enough along for him to tell if it was a boy or a girl, but the baby was healthy. That's all that did matter to him. There was nothing wrong with worrying for a friend's child.. was there?

“I never could hide anything from you...Could I?”

“Logan, Please. He really is sorry. He's just.. you know.. with the school and you of all people know how much a man's egos can get in the way of things...” She mumbled, taking his hand, rubbing over his knuckles.

She wasn't even doing anything with her powers, and yet he felt this intense wave of relief fall over him, only for it to be instantly covered with a sense of protectiveness. She always had that effect on him. He wanted to protect her no matter what.

Swallowing again, he pulled his hand away as it started to sweat.

“That's exactly my point.. If he actually was sorry and believed he did do something wrong, He'd be standing here with you, now wouldn't he?”

“That's not-”

“I'm not finished!” He growled, tired of being spoken over. Wade did a hell of a job to connect his emotions to his mouth, and now he wasn't shutting it off. He worked hard to turn his grunts into words. And she would litsen.

Becoming quiet, she nodded, Implying that he could finish without another interruption.

Taking her other hand, he held both of them.

“I know you're an independent woman. You always have been. But you shouldn't have too. You need a man that will not only defend you, but will take care of you, and stand next to you for things like this.”

This speechless promise quickly becomes a lie. “Logan-” Her eyes were almost… hopeful.

Tears welled in her eyes but wouldn't let them drop.

“I'm not that man.” He started, shaking his head slowly as he did, not wanting her to get any ideas.

“Not anymore… Do you understand? Hell, Even Forge stands up for Ororo and would defend her until his last breath despite her practically being an all-powerful weather goddess!... and your husband won't even stand next to you while saying sorry? Think about it.”

“F-for what?”

“Jean, I'm sorry.”

“Because I'm happy. I was never going to fit into your marriage. Not ever. Not… well. At least. Everyone thinks that relationships are finding someone who matches your puzzle piece. When in reality it's finding someone who's willing to change pieces to fit. I mean- I'm engaged now!” He whispered this bit, almost excited, leaning down some to talk to her.

“Is.. he okay?” She asks.

“How crazy is that? The Wolverine settling down? Crazy to think about. And with a dying maniac at that.” He smiles, only to frown, hearing a big cough and a groan of frustration from the bathroom. “Oohh Fuck..” It said.

He now stands, putting his hands in his pockets. “He gets tummy aches.” He lied, whispering. “Gluten sensitivity.”

“Ooh…then why is he-”

Just before she could say it, Wade came out with a stretch, seeming better as he dramatically held his stomach.

“We're pregnant!!”

“No- we are not.”

“Pfft-” snickering some, Logan put his hand to his face, rubbing it embarrassedly.

“Oh we so are! Don't you remember? It's the only reason he's marrying me really. Got me knocked up and now we're having A shotgun wedding. How scandalous! I can see the headlines now.”

“There's not going to be any headlines, you lunatic!” He chuckled, almost at the brink of giggling.

A frown came to her face, only to softly smile.

“... I've never seen you laugh like that before.”

“Huh? Oh… heh.. yeah. I uhm… I didn't know that I could..”

“Hmm.. Well.. I guess I should be going..” She whispered. “Leave you two alone..” Turning to leave, she had mixed feelings about the interaction. Happy for him yes, but also now had other topics to think about.

“Mmh.. Yeah.. Oh- And Jean?”

Turning, the hope in her eyes made him frown, feeling sort of bad for being kind of a jerk to a pregnant lady. “When Scott grows some balls? He knows where to find me.”

Sighing, she nods. “…Goodnight, Logan.”

“ ‘Night.”

Closing the door, he came back to bed, still giggling a bit. “Why did you tell her we're pregnant? I can't get you pregnant, idiot.”

Laying on the bed, Wade looked slightly offended. “Are you calling me a liar!?”

“I'm calling you the biggest liar.”

He shrugged. “Oh well. And who knows? Maybe I got a cancer baby in there or something.”

Rolling his eyes, He climbed under the blanket with him. “Oh shut up. You don't have a cancer baby.”

“You never know…So…marrying a dying maniac?”

“Oh… how much of that did you hear?”

Grunting, He rolled over, Putting his face in his hands again. “Nngh.. I'm sorry.. I didn't mean for you to hear all that..”

“The bathroom has surprisingly thin walls.”

“It's alright. It's always nice knowing that you're just as big of a whore as I am.”

“Hey! Am not! It was just… complicated.”

“That's what whores say when they can't pick one dick to ride” he giggled, Rolling over to climb into his chest, nuzzling up under his chin.

“Are…are you sure you aren't happier... here?” He asked, the questions slipping out.

So many things were running through his mind, things that he probably shouldn't be thinking but he's learned that as long as it stays in his head, no one would get hurt… except.. that was the hard part.

Logan let out a deep sigh. “Wade?”

“I mean- Do you even like that i'm with Vanessa? What were you doing? Being a barrack bunny? But for the mansion? The mansions personally sex pet or some kinky shit like that?”

“Yeah, yeah.. shut up.. I know...”

“Wade.”

“hm?”

“I let you cut up my dog tags…and turn them into a ring”

“Technically Forge did that- actually.”

“.. a ring that you own now.. right?”

“Uh… yes?”

“And dogs go with their tags.. right?”

“I guess so?”

For a few seconds there was silence.

“So what does that mean?”

“25- no! 26. I'm pretty sure it's 26.”

“What?” He laughed. “That wasn't even a math question.”

“Ugh, just tell me. I'm not good at stupid riddles! If I ever met the riddler I'd just shoot him in the face.”

“The who-? erm, nevermind. If the tags belong to me. Yes?”

“Ok..”

“And now you own them. Yeah?”

“Okay..”

“Then that means..”

Blinking, he suddenly gasped a few seconds later, going into a giggle fit as he held him tight. “Oohh!! I wanna get married!”

“We will. Just not yet.”

“Tomorrow!!”

“No-”

“Why!?”

He wasn't tucking and running anymore. He would stay like a loyal mutt. As long as he wore that ring on his finger, he'd follow him. Whether here, or at that shitty apartment. He didn't care which.

“Because.. you deserve a good one. And good ones aren't planned overnight.” Logan smiled.

“And for your information… I was always the Barrack bunny..”

“GASSSP!! No way!! Same!”

“Yeah I figured that much… and.. As for Vanessa? We're inviting her to the wedding right?”

“Obviously. Duh.”

“.. Go ahead and kiss her after me.”

“Shut up and take orders, Wilson.”

“Really? But that’s- I don't think-”

“Yes sir!.. erm... peanut?”

“Do you still want too?....you know”

“Hm?” It was these late night talks that really made him enjoy having him around. The pressure on his chest, the gabbing, the giggles. It made him feel young again.

“Eh.. not really. 'm tired."

“Oh thank god! My stomach is killing me.” He groaned. Shifting them to lay on his side, Logan pulled him close into his chest, rubbing his stomach softly.

“Behave, Jr.” He mumbled, earning himself another laugh and a deep kiss. “Mmh..” intertwining their hands, Wade curled up against him, happy as always just to be next to him.

“...I love you..” Holding him in his arms as he said this, he felt embarrassed and almost.. nervous. As if he wouldn't say it back. But if there was anything about Wade he knew, it's that he'd never skip a beat to reciprocate affection.. something he wasn't used too.

“..How much?” Usually, he wouldn't ask such childish things. But Tonight? He might have needed it.

“I love you too, Logan. A lot.”

“I'd fight the entire world.”

“You do that anyway. More than tacos?”

“Woah there, Angelcakes! Know your place.”

They both laugh, the giggles die down, and snoring replaces the sounds.

[dr-spectre]

Hello everyone, wanna give a quick update because I have some important stuff to share.

So basically I've been thinking about this for a little bit now and... i wanna start slowing down. I look back at the posts I've made and I've realised that I've done a LOT of posts over the past several months.

IM NOT GONNA DISAPPEAR DONT WORRY!!! I won't be gone!!! I'm not taking a giant break or anything. I just need to allow myself to recharge a bit. Because I feel myself actually getting tired and burning out and i wanna prevent an actual burn out from happening.

When I look at my inbox and I see the asks I get, sometimes I go "man... I really don't wanna respond to this... it'll be too much mental effort. But... the person might get upset or feel hurt that I didn't respond..." that shit weighs a ton on me. It's not to say that peoples asks are bad, HELL NO!! I love getting most of them! It's just that... I'm tired and sometimes I don't know how the hell to respond to something.

Another reason why I wanna slow down is because well... I kindaaa had a mental crisis... I've been feeling very... numb and angry? recently? which is kinda weird considering that Shadow Generations came out and Splatoween is around the corner. Yet i... feel nothing.

I feel my love for Callie slowly dying. It's just that... the common and gross takes about Hypno Callie are starting to really get into me and I'm feeling it's effects. When i see Callie i don't go "CALLIE!!!!!!!!" anymore, i go "Callie....." It's making me feel sad and when i see Callie i think about those takes. They flood into my head.... i feel so childish and dumb... and that i should accept what's "canon" instead of being some obsessive autistic loser.

I don't know what even happened. I think i hate the Splatoon community and youtubers HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

I've also started to feel numb because when i tend to become very passionate and excessive, i then get told off for it. It's like im always pushed down. So if they want me to shut up... fine... i'll shut up. I'll be a grey nothing burger.

Anyways, i'll see you guys later.

[re-colligere]

oooOOhh. this spy au has got me in a chokehold crying sobbing. If I can ask, what are Dr. Axyon's motives (unless it's a secret)?? Is she actually an evil mastermind in this au or is she still kinda. cringefail morally grey like in canon? is the mask just for show/intimidation or does she wear it for a reason? Her design in this au is so. RAHH 💕💖🧡 sorry sorry about the questions 😭 I have so many about everyone and this whole story but im trying to maintain the illusion of being Normal™

AKDSJFHJKH AHH I'm super duper happy people are this interested in the au, I never would've imagined honestly ;u; also IT'S OKAYY don't worry about the questions! They could actually help me too with additional writing bits (since I tend to only focus on the important stuff), it gets those creative gears going >:] so I'd be more than happy to answer them :3

...I mean. That is. if it's not spoilery </3 in which case I DO need to be a little secretive about it (for now!) Just like right now, with Dr. Axyon's motivations...that's a big ol' secret >:3c !! It'll be revealed in due time since, with the plot I'm thinking of, it basically revolves around her movements.

as for the evil mastermind / actually a bit cringefail but morally gray, right now I'll leave that up to you guys' judgements! Partly because it's tied very closely to her main motive so I can't say that Outright...but I also want to see what you guys think about her so far 👍 She also wears a mask for a Reason, intimidation is a bonus but as the mastermind she usually doesn't come face to face with her enemies that much.

Again, I really do appreciate quastions and such I VERY much encourage them!! It's just gonna be a thing with me that I'll be irritatingly vague about some of them because I do want to tell a self-contained linear story with them, eventually...................I can only dream... but otherwise PLEASE please please. you don't have to be normal about them because I sure aren't!!!! and idk it's just really neat to know that people are invested enough in the things i do to feel like that. So it's a huge compliment for me LMAO!! Thank you!!

[tonydaddingham]

Hi! I'm kinda here to ask for clarification on something you said; hope you won't mind^. You say that Crowley's dark grey comment is one of the more honest and introspective things he says: that kinda comes across to me like you saying that Crowley's saying he's mostly bad with a capacity for good* and that's a fair assessment of him. I would have said it's more that he's mostly good with a capacity for bad**, baggages worth of issues and a bunch of flaws, primarily related to arrogance***, but that's technically beside the point: I also felt like that was the direction your character analysis of him was going. I'm now wondering whether I misunderstood the dark grey comment or misunderstood the analyses... what does your exactly mean, exactly?

*Concepts decapitalised because I'm talking about more human than Heavenly or Hellish standards of good and bad.

**Concepts decapitalised: see above.

***Blinkered was the word you used, I believe? It's a lovely expression.

^This isn't meant accusatory and I did my best not to sound like it, but I know you've had to field a few asks about yes, you do like Crowley very much, your criticism of him doesn't mean that's not the case, and I can only imagine how annoying that must be: feel free to can this if it comes across that way.

oh anon sweetheart 💕 don't worry about the tone or wording - your tone is perfectly polite and courteous, and i thank you for that!!! others have not been as conscientious 💀 though, be careful what you wish for in asking this, because it's gonna be lengthy 🫠

how you interpreted it is exactly as i meant it; i do think, when taking crowley's characterisation in the show (his book characterisation, for me, is rather different), crowley for me is a darker character with the capacity for light, rather than the other way around. and im going to specifically use darker and lighter, as opposed to bad and good respectively, because upon reflection, maybe that's more accurate.

yeah, to me, he is a dark character; if you've read any of my other asks/metas, please forgive me for repeating stuff, but imo the narrative tells us that he is more commonly swimming in darker tendencies than light. feel free to skip the next part and scroll to here*, because i will be recounting specific scenarios off the top of my head (going in chronological order):

not really explored fully in the pre-fall scene, because it runs throughout the show as a prominent theme; crowley is either unaware of why he fell (possibly true), or blatantly lies to himself and others about why he fell (equally plausible). his story about it changes, or at best is simply told in fragments... but his overall demeanour of when (e.g.) he's confronted with news of the apocalypse ("why me?"), when coupled with this, suggests a tendency towards blame avoidance, with a hearty dose of chip-on-your-shoulder complex

tempts aziraphale into eating in job; it doesn't really matter whether or not aziraphale ends up liking food and wine or not - he rejects the wine, and crowley immediately changes tack to offer food instead, citing that he can't get drunk on it, and of course he's not tempting him (absolutely is) so it's fine. aziraphale may have been curious about it, and this may be what crowley picks up on, but compare this scene to where aziraphale offers muriel a cupperty, and doesn't push when they refuse drinking it... hmm. (perceived feeder kink or not, crowley's face at the end of this scene screams satisfaction at his corruption)

this one is a little iffy, granted, but adding it anyway - blatantly dismisses aziraphale's concerns about the arrangement (heaven would be rather angry, but nowhere near how hell would retaliate - "they'll destroy you!), and pushes anyway. it's again another case of pushing for what he wants (and yes, true, what aziraphale secretly wants - which crowley detects and capitalises on), dismissing aziraphale's worries that, as we can surmise later on, were not unfounded

lets the french guard be taken off to his death. this is debatable, depending on whether you consider the guard to be a good or bad person in the context of the reign of terror, and deserving of execution as a result, but they could have easily escaped the cell unscathed without unfreezing the guard - ultimately, who are they (yep, including aziraphale here too, he's equally as culpable) to decide if he should die?

in the same vein, sends two watchmen falling to their deaths down a deep pit, and his only remark is, "might have slightly overdone it on the hole..."

(this one is tricky, but it rubbed me up the wrong way on first watch and thereafter so im including it) when morag dies, crowley's handling of the situation only really serves - imo - to rub it in aziraphale's face, when he already feels guilty enough for the both of them. i realise that he had to labour the point to aziraphale, and was just being honest - fair, he has a point! - but it came across as simply unkind and uncharitable... again, towards someone we are assuming he cares deeply about...

this one is in fact going to lean on some interpretation, but i think it's one that is so widely implied in canon that i think it might as well be; something happened to crowley between 1827 and 1862, and within that time, i don't think he was on best terms with aziraphale, given aziraphale's coldness when he arrives in st james' park. so, we could - could - surmise that he just suddenly asks for holy water from aziraphale, something that would be dangerous for them both and seems to exploit their friendship. he doesn't adequately explain why he needs it ("just insurance" is not sufficient at all imo), and taking offence to aziraphale's use of 'fraternising ' then contextually feels a little hypocritical

lies to aziraphale about having experience with a gun, banking on using a miracle if need be - which ultimately puts aziraphale's 'life' on the line, rather than being honest. he may well just want to make aziraphale happy, sure, but aziraphale goes into the bullet catch without all the facts - his face when crowley admits he's never shit (edit: meant to say shot, obviously, but leaving it in for @fabledshadow💕) a gun before says it all, really

when aziraphale saves his life with the photo trick, he doesn't thank him, or acknowledge any kind of gratitude at all, that it saved him from a rather bleak fate at the hands of hell. he may well be insulting aziraphale's skills to dissuade him from a repeat occurrence of the bullet catch (fair!), but he is also insulting the very thing that got him out of danger... and the very thing that aziraphale obviously takes a lot of joy, pleasure, and pride in (and, yk, what crowley was actively encouraging just a few hours previous). it was justified, to a certain extent, but it was... unkind

(the Big One - so let's get it over with) tries to tempt aziraphale into killing a child - antichrist or not - and continues to persuade him into it despite aziraphale evidently being uncomfortable with the prospect. it also indicates how little he knows aziraphale in this respect; regardless of whether it would be the antichrist or not, this is the angel who tried to preserve humanity by offering a sword to pregnant eve, and was ultimately crucial in protecting job's children. even in mesopotamia, you can see how subtley appalled he is with killing children - despite him trying to rationalise it by saying it's the great plan etc. killing a child, id wager, would destroy aziraphale. i digress, but if crowley loves aziraphale as much as he (and the fandom) likes to think by s1, it's rather dark that he would try manipulating aziraphale into doing this in the first place, and return to the suggestion again not once (bandstand) but twice (airfield)

sets up an elaborate trick just to make a point to aziraphale on the use of guns, and then lets innocent humans get arrested on what i would say would be very serious charges in s1 (i mean, let alone firearms offences, arguably it could be charged as attempt murder 💀)

hits anathema and acts in such a way that he probably understands that he equally hit her and she hit him, yet is more preoccupied with fixing the bentley, something he could miracle repaired later on... as opposed to helping her back to her feet and ensuring she was alright. he also is prepared, after all this, to reject offering her a lift, excusing that there's nowhere to put her bike

backhands "clever" with "stupid", because aziraphale is doing something (trying to reach god directly as a last resort) he doesn't think is worthwhile. aziraphale finds out that that is true, but once again, im gonna ring the 'unkind' bell

doesn't tell aziraphale about what went down with gabriel, or how closely hell is keeping an eye on him, or the threat of the BOL, or that he's living in his car, or what happened in heaven/the issue of the second coming. there are loads of other little things too, but he lies by omission, whilst maintaining that he doesn't lie to aziraphale, and routinely keeps information from aziraphale - not only information that would be beneficial to share in the general sense, but information that directly impacts aziraphale, and comprises both of their safeties. has a tendency towards a hero complex that ends up either going wrong/unfulfilled ("i won't leave you on your own" then immediately buggers off to heaven) or attempts to remove aziraphale's agency and dismisses him outright ("i have a suggestion-" "ive got this.")

abandons aziraphale when he is set in doing something that is not only in his very nature to do, but when he does it because he doesn't have all the facts (hides jim). despite his assertion that aziraphale shouldnt do it because jim poses a threat, he then leaves aziraphale to face it alone. it's unknown how soon crowley would have come back to the bookshop if it weren't for the BOL threat - we literally do not know this - and he reluctantly does the apology dance (arguably when he wholeheartedly believes he was in the right) in order to be allowed near aziraphale again. it's also implied that aziraphale always does the dance, whereas crowley doesn't - which suggests to me once again the whole thing about crowley avoiding blame

pushes jim into remembering stuff despite it obviously causing him pain and discomfort - on one hand, sure, he's not certain that gabriel isn't lurking about in there, but he does it again in ep5 when, as far as he's assessed with the whole jump-out-the-window thing (a whole other thing that need addressing), jim is in fact... just jim

plays around with maggie and nina (the both of them do, and they're both at huge fault for this, it's insane) like they're toys, without any regard for their personal thoughts or feelings, as if they have the right to do this

encourages jim to jump out a window!!! okay fine, yes, he fears that gabriel is lurking in there and is doing it as a test, but even he looks somewhat alarmed when jim is clambering over the windowsill - and objectively it's an atrocious thing to do. and ultimately it doesnt exactly prove anything more than what he already knows; if gabriel was chilling in there, and was so committed to the bit to drink hot chocolate, call crowley his friend with a straight face, speak to crowley as such as friend, and generally act the way he does... if gabriel is that good an actor? well, i can't imagine jumping a window would be beneath gabriel to do, to maintain his cover. so to me, crowley realised that what he's asked has crossed a line

and, im sorry, but - kisses aziraphale. now is probably the worst climate imaginable (ie. the "do that again" era) to be discussing my take on the kiss, but my read has largely always been that it was a temptation, and a cruel one at that. it was desperate, and heartbreaking, and i understand why crowley did it - but it was imo a largely cruel and selfish manipulation for aziraphale to betray himself, and stay with him. i love the kiss for what it is and represents, but as a result i just... yeah, im not a "do that again" girlie, because i think aziraphale absolutely recognised the kiss for what it 'was'.

anon, if you have made it this far... im so sorry. it's been helpful to summarise all of it though, so thank you for giving me an opportunity to do so!!✨

*now. the thing is, the vast majority of these incidents, these actions and behaviours (and probably loads besides that ive missed) are not evil. they are not even necessarily bad, not in the classic sense. a lot of them have well-founded explanations, sometimes outright justifications, and it's totally understandable why crowley makes them (even just narratively ie. even without speculating or inferring in any kind of trauma he may have suffered behind the scenes if the story as it currently stands).

id argue, personally, that each one of these is dark in their own way - dark, in the sense that they are morally ambiguous at best, immoral at worst. they might not be bad on their own merit, but arguably it is possible to see them as wrong.

we can absolutely look at crowley and think he is good - and i agree!... to a certain extent. even if you oust a good few of the above examples, there are a few that, imo, if ignored or excused, kind of strays into blatant mollycoddling of the character. crowley absolutely has the capacity for good and right - his objection to the flood, saving job's children, stopping the apocalypse, helping aziraphale many a time, are all prime examples (even if you could argue against each of these which... well, this ask is long enough so another time, maybe) - and i think will ultimately be guided by what he considers to be the right thing to do.

but when i say that his assessment of being "very dark grey", the above is why i think this is him being either extremely honest, or accidentally incredibly insightful about himself. it's not necessarily a dislikeable thing to be - crowley being more dark than light - but given the evidence as i see it, he's aware that he's not a wholly good person, more one that leans towards the objectively immoral than otherwise, giving more weight to when he does do good. and the thing is, he regularly asserts this - being 'bad' - to aziraphale.

in doing so - constantly saying he's not nice, rejecting thanks etc - maybe, actually, it's not as humble or self-effacing as aziraphale, or the fandom, likes to think it is. why shouldn't we consider that crowley might, actually, be a bit of an anti-hero? it doesn't make him any less of an empathetic, likeable, or compelling character - it just simply acknowledges that he may not be as irreproachable or scrupulous character as we might like to think he is!✨

[foileadeux]

im obsessed with your art and animatics... do you have any tutorials or process posts about some techniques you use? like how you move characters separate of the backgrounds (is it just some clever tweening in vegas??) ty in advance... ;; v ;;

sure! umm this is gonna be messy sorry if anythings incoherent. ill walk u thru this segment of the pkradi hollow fight bc theres a lotta layers. heres the shot for reference

aaand heres a breakdown of the layers (called tracks in sony vegas but im just gonna keep calling them layers) from top to bottom

heres the foreground! where i wanna place shit that goes in front of the characters and background

heres where the characters will be placed! sandwiched between the foreground and background, they get more frames (as shown by the smaller segmented images on the timeline) opposed to set pieces which is usually just 1 image, which means we gotta approach tweening w the characters differently since there are a lot more images! ill explain that after this initial breakdown

and heeeres all the background shenanigans. not much to add here. those sure are background frames

RIGHT now to the tweening. when tweening 1 image/frame whateva you're gonna wanna use pan/crop (located on the image, that lil box with a crop around it icon), use this for stuff that only really needs 1 image, like a background. because its easier. like you could use track motion for everything i guess but pan/crops nice and easy and doesnt give me a headache she treats me nice and good

but uh yea so youll start with a little keyframe at the beginning, drag the pan/crop timeline to the end and click the little + sign to create a keyframe! then from there move the pan/crop box (the one with an F on it lmao) around and kablammo. Movement. usually with backgrounds its just a simple panning to the left or right, like how i did it for this shot! but you can do lots more like zoom and angle it etc

aand when you wanna tween across multiple images in a layer/track you're gonna head on over to your layer/track and hit that funny little track motion button aand youll be greeted with a pan/crop lookin thing except its like. for the whole layer/track instead. so the timeline is waaay bigger since it covers the whole thing. but umm yes same principle as pan/crop basically, except youll now need to insert "hold" keyframes right after your final keyframe, copy and paste a keyframe with all the positions defaulted (im gonna assume youre using 1920 x 1080 since its the standard)

like so and then right click a grey keyframe and choose "hold". this stops everything from fucking up and flying between each keyframe basically LMAOO the Hold is it waiting for your next keyframe that is Not a hold. if that makes sense. anyways yea only worry about that for track motion JUST because it works with the entire track/layer, with pan/crop you can ignore this

BUT YEAH thats my silly little sony vegas tweening guide i hope that helps!! umm i have another tutorial also so u can check that out too if youd like :D

[my-traumacore-sideblog]

i was just scrolling thru tiktok and found this, it's genuinely so triggering to see how little the staff think about the patients and how casually they talk about forcing meds on the patients

it shows so clearly that they don't see the patients as people because if they did they wouldn't be posting this shit talking about it and bosting about forcing unwanted medication on human beings and the fact that in most of these places if you are a patient you are not allowed to have contact with the outside world ""for the sake of your dignity"" supposedly so when u r out then no1 has 2 know what kind of state u were in but then the staff members r allowed 2 post abt u having ur breakdowns is rly telling and they r rly telling on themselves here

it was never abt our dignity

it was abt making sure we couldn't beg friends or family members 2 get us out of there

i hate this so much

sorry if this is more raw than normal im typing while triggered since this is more healthy than hurting my body

please don't try to talk to me directly on this post, i just needed to get my raw feelings out and then after this im probably just gonna cry and have a snack or something

please don't report this post bc of me talking abt my experiences w my own emotions, like i said this is not a threat of self harm, i do this so i don't feel the urge 2 do smth more destructive, sort of like writing in a journal? but this is more acessible 4 me bc it's just a place 4 feelings like this and stuff that triggers me and i can hav ppl online validate my feelings that yeah this stuff isn't okay and it's okay 2 b upset abt it, this is me being responsible and preventing myself from harming myself, bc i hav this blog as a method of getting it all out u guys don't need 2 worry, thought i should clarify given some of the stuff i was talking abt earlier in the post abt having rly raw emotions rn

rn at least? i want this post 2 go fucking viral

i want ppl 2 c how fucked up this is

how medical workers don't c us as ppl

how they think nothing of forcing medicine and "treatments" on us that we don't want

how 2 them we r just an obstacle in their day

just 2 b clear nothing bad is going 2 happen 2 me if this doesn't go viral, like i said, this is just me getting all my feelings out and dumping them onto virtual paper so i don't have them rattling around in my head anymore

whatever happens 2 this post, im just gonna finish this post, hav a good cry or a sad nap and a snack and then a talk with a loved one and im going to then continue my day as normal

this post going viral or not viral would have zero impact on my day, i just right now am having this desperate feeling of wanting to shove this in everyone's face and go "see!? this is how they see us! this isn't okay! can someone do something!? can someone out there force these people to acknowledge the ableism in the medical professionals!? the medical professionals i am sometimes forced to trust with my health as a disabled person! and yet they feel nothing but vile disgust towards me!"

idk, i just feel like this tiktok is a rly good example of the kind of medical ableism and medical abuse me and others like me have been yelling about for ages

okay better now after getting that out, thought i should tell u guys so u don't worry abt me, seen ppl being weird abt ppl emotional posting and now it's made me worried i hav 2 b super careful if u couldn't tell so yeah, better now tho

update: found out how 2 report content so i did that 4 the tiktok, u go 2 the share button and then there's a lil grey looking button w a flag on it 4 any of the rest of u who c this and think it should b reported/taken down

[courtofmatchups]

Hi hi! Can I get a tokyo debunker matchup?

Pronouns : im biologically a female but tbh getting called a man feels pretty good sometimes it feels like im a transformer or smth

Appearance : shoulder-length black hair and grey eyes, i wear glasses but one of the lenses cracked in half :') kept on wearing it until now tho lmao

I forgot my height, but last time I checked it was in the 170 cm zone :')

In terms of fashion sense, if it's a night out i'd do outfits similar to Taiga, if it's daytime i'd lean more into ren's type of casual clothing(easy to move in)

Personality : it depends since I have a habit of adjusting to others (f/e if the person i'm talking to is talkative i'll just listen whilst if the person is more of a listener i'd talk in their stead) with the exception on if that someone's an asshole i'd be an asshole too to spite them, i get bored pretty easily resulting in me jumping between extracurriculars(switching whenever i get bored of it) but i do appreciate regular mundane stuff if things get too hectic

Usually i'd be an easygoing person, although i'd prefer if most people only know my name and nothing else, it's fun to keep people on their toes ^^

In terms of morals i just. Use a spinwheel to decide whether i'm morally good grey or bad, i may not have a gambling addiction but i AM good at gambling--

My favorite hobbies are doing imaginary math problems in my head(blame my asian parents lmao), chess, practicing combat(mostly close ranged combats and aikido), playing games(mostly games that's give me adrenaline), and debating

Personally i apologize for putting in so many hobbies i just jump around doing stuff sometimes

Either that or i just crash on my bed and refuse to get up for 12 hours straight

I don't really have any dislikes, it depends on my mood to be honest( and also depends on the majestic all mighty daily morality roullete wheel)

Extra : i have a habit of only eating one meal per day(afternoon) since i dont have that much of an apetite, i like cooking tho(WOULD cook for someone)

I can play a few instruments like the piano guitar and violin, ive always wanted to learn how to play a harp, so that might be in my list

Sorry for making this so long, i hope you have a great day!! Don't forget to take care of yourself, drink enough water, eat healthily and get gokd amounts of sleep (:

It seems to me, You've captured the heart of...

Taiga Hoshibami!

You quite literally match his freak, and lord help whoever crosses the two of you

How I see you meeting is during the Sinostra episode. You said something unhinged, much to Ritsu's dismay, but Taiga wasn't offended. Far from it, actually. He was quite amused. You weren't particularly pleased with the interaction, but Taiga would remember your name and face in no time, so less risk of him shooting you.

In time, he would actually seek you out just for some attention, and even if he might come off a little strong, give him the benefit of the doubt, as he means no harm to you.

In the time you do become a couple, things are gonna look up a little for the students. Even if the two of you are super unhinged, you can chill him out if things are getting out of hand. And don't worry about getting bored around him. He'll find an activity you'd like.

Some aspects of you that he really likes are that you're really good at mental math. He runs a casino, and your prowess at predicting outcomes based on math is fascinating to him. And aside from that you can help to keep track of Sinostra's earnings, so that will come in clutch for both himself and Romeo.

Personally, I'm not too sure how he'd feel about you sleeping for 12 hours straight most of the time, but on some level, I think he'd get it. He'd often use you as his personal body pillow, so be prepared for that.

So, in conclusion, Taiga's erratic and mysterious nature would mesh well with your own, and the two of you would become a power couple in the best and worst (for anyone who cross you, that is) ways possible.

[sweetnnaivete]

i give you with a book boyfriend / girlfriend after a short description of yourself and your fandoms! + moodboard

omg hi ceri!!! congrats on 50! <3 anywho!! i’m part of the marauders fandom, the outsiders fandom, the pjo fandom, etc so you can pick!! :3

physical: i’m 5’3” , i have dyed red hair but it’s a little bit faded now, it’s to my shoulder blades and it’s wavy. i have blue,green,grey eyes that change depending on the day/what i’m wearing, i have freckles but only on one side of my eyes, my nails are short because i bite them a lot but i’m working on it and they’re painted black but the paints chipping off a bit.

aesthetic/personality: i’m kind of a mix of boho/hippie and like downtown girl if that makes sense. i like long skirts, and tank tops, i have a lot of band tees and i adore sweaters and converse all though i really want a pair of doc martins.

im an entp, aquarius, gryffindor, & cabin 11 (hermes :3) in terms of the golden retriever x black cat trope i am 10000000% the golden retriever. i try to be happy a lot and just joke around. 3 or 4 people put in my yearbook that they love how i’m always smiling in the halls and stuff, i’m hyper a lot of the time but i just try to find adventure a lot. i love taking walks, sunsets, listening to music (the smiths,the cure, deftones,the smashing pumpkins, the beatles, fleetwood mac,) and others i have a very very diverse music taste. i love movies as well, horrors my fav genre, followed by coming of age, but disney movies have a special place in my heart and coco makes me cry all the time lol. i love screaming and dancing to disney songs while doing simple tasks like cleaning my room. i like to read and write as well. i have adhd, both hyperactive and inattentive. anddddddddddd i’m a very picky eater.

OMG IM SOREY THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE SJOET 😔😔🤞🤞🤞 IM SOREY CERI ILYSM!! CONGRATS <32

10 THINGS I HATE LOVE ABOUT YOU for dallas

a/n sorry this took so long lol SIDENOTE your music taste is so good omg

not even gonna lie to you, i came up with this after my first read-through of your ask, but i was doubting myself a lot SOO it may not be totally accurate 🫣 but i thought you and james potter would be a cute couple

my main worry in this pairing would be clashing personalities, but lemme just explain myself first

he's very caring and sweet, but he also likes to have some fun. he would be SO willing to do all sorts of fun things with you, like watching your favorite movies, taking walks, etc. i also hc that james doesn't really have his own music taste, so he'd listen to whatever you play or recommend to him. also, when it comes to picky eating i js know he'd eat anything you left on your plate lmaoo 😌

here's the moodboard >_<

[queenangst]

DARE I REQUEST… 1 & Neverafter? In my head im thinking Pinocchio and his father, but im also thinking of PIB and Tomás, but I’d be very psyched for more Neverafter pieces

sorry about the blood in your mouth i wish it was mine + pinocchio & geppetto (and mother goose) | read on ao3

Pinocchio doesn't know why he goes to Tim.

Maybe it's 'cause, like, Mother Goose is one of the only adults in their little crew. Maybe it's because all of the times Tim will put a hand on Pinocchio's shoulder—not hesitating for a moment for his fingers to rest on wood—and say a little word of encouragement, or maybe it's the way Tim tells stories, steady and just the right way.

Maybe it's the greying hair and the smile. Maybe it's that Mother Goose is a dad, and Pinocchio is a kid. Not his son, not his kid. But:

"So, uh," Pinocchio says. "Hey."

Tim smiles easily. "Here, come on, why don't you sit."

"Sure."

"You find any good hot dogs?"

"What? Oh," Pinocchio says, and holds up his empty hands. "Not really. Guess they got eaten. I kinda wanted to talk to you or whatever. That's all."

Tim turns fully. He's a pretty transparent guy, not a particularly good liar really, but Pinocchio likes that about him. That there's someone who gets it—lying is necessary, to survive—but who's still bad at it, in the kind of way that means he doesn't like it. It means he doesn't really hide the surprise that flits across his face, or the warmth.

"Not about the hot dogs."

"Not about the hot dogs," Pinocchio agrees, and tries to figure out how to say it. "It's about my dad, actually. Um."

Everyone knows about Mom, now. Ugh, not Mom. Stepmother, with a The in front too, apparently. Her. And they kind of know about Dad from that snatch of memory they'd shared, which is honestly a pretty bad impression, 'cause Dad was just upset even though Pinocchio had tried to do the right thing, lying.

He must be silent for a little too long, because Tim goes, "...Pinoch?"

"Yeah. I guess I just wanted to, well, there's just some stuff I wanted to say to him when I can see him but I don't—I don't think that's gonna be anytime soon. So maybe we could workshop a tight five?"

Tim laughs. "Sure."

In the same way everyone kind-of-knows about Pinocchio's dad, everyone also kind-of-knows about Jack. That story was told quick and tied up neatly when Tim brought it up. A book, a wish, and a Gander. The end.

Pinocchio thinks there's blood in that story that got left out. There's blood in his.

"What do you want to tell him?"

When Pinocchio was a real boy, real-real, he'd picked up a few habits. Mostly bad ones, of course; but one of them was cracking his knuckles. He saw Candlewick do it and thought it was cool. Something about the feeling, and the sound.

Even after he turned back, he still does it sometimes. It doesn't work the same way with wood, doesn't crack, but he's carried it over anyway. He cracks his knuckles. Left, then right.

"I'm sorry about lying, I guess," Pinocchio says.

He twists his nose in his hand. On his face, under splinters, there's a dull ache.

He is sorry about lying. That it was one of the only things Dad asked of him, to not. He is not sorry about lying to save Dad. Or lying to get a ride, or a little money, to survive.

My son, Dad said, when he saw Pinocchio as a real boy. Tears welled in his eyes.

"You needed to," Tim says gently. "I would've lied too."

"Yeah." Not that the lie had saved Dad, in the end. Just spared both of them some time. "But I'm still sorry, anyway. I just don't regret it."

"It's okay if you tell him that, too, you know."

Pinocchio swallows. Another human trait.

"I miss him. A lot."

Darkness swallowing him. A low, throaty sound that sends vibrations right through him. A flickering candle at the bottom of the ocean.

The whole time, Dad said, I was only worried about you. If you were safe, and okay. If you were hungry. If you'd gotten into trouble and I couldn't help you.

Tim sucks in a breath and lets it out slowly. "I get that."

"I don't really wanna go back," Pinocchio says, not to the life of worrying about every single little thing, about performing, about being good and whatever that meant. Back doesn't mean simpler, either, just different.

And even if Pinocchio could go back now, if Tim's book could magic up some spot in that story... he'd know. That things could be different. That the story was a story. That most of it was never really his in a way that mattered.

Won't it hurt him? Pinocchio asked. Isn't there any other way?

If you want us all to be happy, you need to help me. If you're going to help me, you need power. If you need power, you need blood. And you don't have blood.

So—be good, Pinocchio.

"I want him to be safe," Pinocchio mutters. He leans, without thinking about it. He's a little too old to play pretend even if he closes his eyes, pretend that it's not Tim but it's Dad instead. "I know even when- when he messed up he just wanted to take care of me. And I want to, I need to make sure he's okay."

There are still a hundred, a thousand, versions of Dad, he thinks. But not his dad, the one who held him gently even as a puppet to layer lacquer on him; the one who took the coat off his back, shivering in the cold, and sold it for a single school book Pinocchio doesn't remember the contents of. Not the one who wrapped his arm around Pinocchio as they stood on the tuna's back and headed home.

"We'll find your dad," Tim says.

"Pib says we got a long list of bullshit to do."

"We'll add it to the list. It's important."

His nose is still dark, stained in this world with blood from the last. His dad's sacrifice. His love. His care. His pain.

There's one more thing he needs to tell Dad. He doesn't say this one out loud, just thinks it, I'm sorry you hurt for me. I wish it could be me.

He's not sorry for lying. But he's sorry the lie took his blood away, so Dad had to bleed instead.

"Right," Pinocchio says. "Okay. I'm trying to figure out how to tell this joke right, but I don't think it wood work. You know what I mean?"

Tim throws his head back and laughs. He squeezes Pinocchio's shoulder.

"We'll workshop everything," he says, "and the next time you say all of this it'll be to your dad, okay?"

[bonesandthebees]

OOOOHHDHFJGK i love the stars wilbur fact so much and oh . Now i am thinking about how much i miss stars sobs its so good

And okay . I am trying to be normal bee. I am so normal about this sandduo slice of life (have i ever told u that slice of life is my fav au ever) tHATS NORTHWEST AND NATURE CENRRICIDUD im normal . I am sooo normal . Literally. I am a perfectly normal human being who took this information, smiled, and moved along like a normal human being. Yep.

AHDKFJDLFFJDLFJKDFJLDDHFLDHDLFHSKFHDLDHFLGHDLFHSLDHDLDHDLFJDLDHDLDJDLFHDLFFJDLHDLFHFLSJDFLJDDLJFDLFJGLJDJFFJLDJGKFK

coughs

Anyways genuinely excited at the idea!! But i also won't be upset if it never gets posted, bc i totally fucking get you man, and you are so valid for that

I am also just . In shock at the idea even existing LMAODJFGKF are u trying to target me bee, i feel targeted rn wtf /pos

And on another note, THE NEW WIP SOUNDS SO COOLFJGKGK i keep forgetting to read rhe prequel one shot bUT YAURRHFFFFF happy to see more sandduo but ALSO excited to see rainduo, i love how you write rainduo sosososo much and ofc . Crimeboys, ur crimeboys are the only ones ever sighs

You know i never really thought of myself as a big politics fan but hot damn i fucking loved stars sm so im excited to see more of it!!! I feel like the tension is gonna be SO GOOD also HELL YEAH MURDER TIME LETS GOOO

Ough i love grey morality it's sooo fun to play around with eueueueu i feel like theres gonna be some crazy shit to work with for theories n stuff i am sooo excited

Thanks for the banger info bee :D (again no pressure on the sandduo au at all!!! I just think it's very neat that it exists :D <3)

stars I miss it too <333

LMAO yeah I had a feeling you'd have a Moment learning that I have a slice of life sandduo fic living in my drive. I really do want to write it, but it's just one of those things where every time I sit down and try to do it my brain just doesn't latch onto it. I'm currently trying to rework the plot to make it a bit more interesting for me because I really adore the concept and atmosphere, but idk I also like the og story I came up with so I might just try to push through

here's a snippet though if you want to get an idea of the vibes

also don't worry about reading the royalty au prequel lol it's not necessary to understand the main story, it'll just help provide a little more backstory and context :)

i'm so glad you're excited though!! I'm really excited to dive back into writing royal politics. I didn't think I would enjoy writing it that much either but then I wrote stars and was like "oh my god this is so fun" so I can't wait to share that world with you guys

[ohmym1stake]

infodumping about my grey's anatomy blorbos: edition #2

this time around i am midway thru season 10.... my #1 blorbo is about to leave and im worried and scared because of some spoilers i read. but anyways here is my current analysis!

BLORBOS

- meredith grey. we started off rocky but i love and support her wholeheartedly now. has done the least stupid stuff as a doctor! bonus points for that. has gone through so much more than she deserves.

- derek shepherd. has done a lot of stupid shit and is a very stupid and reckless man. but underneath all of that he is a good man who wants to do good and help people. an amazing father!!!! and husband.

- cristina yang. the closest to perfect. i wish she would stop making awful relationship decisions. in my world she is happily married to a woman. a nurse, maybe.

- george o'malley. my perfect perfect son. ohhhhh my son. i am so sorry you died. i wish you had gotten to be happy with callie and have a great little family together and be an amazing surgeon.

- callie torres. brilliant surgeon brilliant woman. a little stupid at times. but i think her strengths are all way stronger than that.

- mark sloan. also very stupid! but in a very charming way. was amazing to watch him grow and change.

- lexie grey. deserved a better exit from the show wtffff. got used as an extra trauma to throw at meredith or something like damn. she was amazing and excellent in her own right. justice for lexiepedia.

- april kepner. BABYYYYYY. amazing and deserves the world, honestly. i have nothing but admiration for her i think.

- heather brooks. AAAAAAGH?!!!!! she was so cute and fun and brought an energy to the show nobody else has! deserved soooo much better.

HALF BLORBOS.

- alex karev. has done too many messy and problematic things to be a full blorbo but like derek he is ultimately a good man who wants to do good. amazing peds surgeon. can't wait to see him as a dad i bet he'll be a little league coach.

- miranda bailey. now normally she would be full blorbo but she's been bothering me a little lately! amazing surgeon! amazing woman! but she needs to get her life more under control or something.

BLORBO BY ASSOCIATION

- jackson avery. i was gonna put him in "it won't work" but it could eventually idk. he's great for april and a good doctor! i don't like his face tho and mostly he kinda bores me

- reed adamson. i think i would have loved her so much if she got to live longer. i think about her and april a lot.

PARTIAL BLORBOS

- addison montgomery. i think i just don't see her enough to be a full blorbo. excellent character tho.

- teddy altman. i think when she comes back on the show she'll get an upgrade but right now she's away and not on my mind. she was pretty damn good tho.

- stephanie edwards. she's really great but right now her plot is kind of just avery. i hope to love her more soon!

EX BLORBOS.

- izzie stevens. used to be my favorite.... she was so great. honestly i blame cancer for everything. Except the denny lvad thing i think that was precancer. but the romance with george that she dropped so fast? and then doing all that crap to alex? unforgivable. i hope she finds happiness in a new life with new people but i want her far away from my blorbos.

IT WILL NEVER WORK BUT I DON'T HATE YOU

- owen hunt. i DO hate his pro-life stance. treated cristina awfully there. but he is also the best love interest she had. and he's a great trauma surgeon, and the best chief i have seen! we just have too many differences to ever truly blorb together.

- arizona robbins. Honestly? most of the time i Do hate her. but i also respect her too much to Anti her. especially her growth after losing her leg! but it fucking sucked for callie. i think if the show had kept mark alive i could have gotten along with her more but she has been awful to callie way too much.

- leah murphy. Mad respect for her crazy but her emotions are also what ruined her. i hope she has a good career elsewhere.

- ben warren. sometimes he's good for bailey sometimes he makes her worse. but i respect him.

I DON'T KNOW

- jo wilson. uhhhh..... she just kinda exists i don't know. sometimes she's good for alex. but i am not very interested in her. does not spark joy.

- charles percy. i think we would have had a very rocky relationship had he lived but i think the way they killed him was very artful? it was one of the best death scenes i have seen.

ANTI BLORBOS.

- richard webber. he has done too much fuckass shit and acted insufferably FAR too many times. way more tolerable as a general surgeon and not as chief but still incredibly irritating.

- preston burke. took advantage of cristina in so many ways and never once truly considered himself and his own actions. selfish, awful man.

- erica hahn. Too bitter. involved emotions in her work in a way i disliked? i think she was never meant to be a main character.

- shane ross. Bruh what the fuckkkkk. he has done way too much wrong. maybe someday if we actually tackle the fact that he kinda Killed heather we can be at least partial or something but ..... i don't want him on this show.

- ellis grey. Noooooope. don't even care about all her groundbreaking work or her disease or whatever. i want nothing to do with her.

- adele webber. i hated her so much and there was no reason to make her so evil and irritating so much??????? the show would have been way more interesting and webber might have been more redeemable if she had been Good.

- sloan riley. this girl pissed me offffff like she went thru it she was having a bad time but ultimately she just ruined shit for mark and lexie and that sucks.

- catherine avery. whenever shes around and is rude to jackson he becomes a temporary blorbo. he doesn't deserve the shit she puts him through. frustrating character overall. But! mad respect to her work as a urologist she always brings interesting cases to the show!

[future--ghost]

I HAD THIS WEIRD ASS MULTI-FANDOM DREAM LAST NIHHT EXCEPT IT WAS MAINLT ABOUT BATIM??? HELPP??

I had this weird ass dream about a batim themed movie and it was about the Ink Curse??? So it started out with Hunter from the Owl House getting put in time out and then he fell asleep, so Lilth drew one of those two swiggly lines on his face.

Then it cut to the bendy movie??? That was only part one and 3 and a half hours long??? So basically the MC who was a girl, I think she was a brunette caucasian teenager and her best friend who was the stereotypical pretty popular girl looks (blonde hair, blue eyes etc, lets call her Brittany) but she was really nice. One day, MC (im gonna call her autumn) falls asleep, and her face gets those squiggly lines like Hunter got in the prolouge. She wakes up and looks in the mirror, and now there are two circles of her skin coming a little outward, like she got two small warts on her face, but she didn't? Then she goes to the library and meets this nice guy named Aaron, who's got 4c curls and a nice fade. They start talking and hit it off immediately. Then Autumn gets these really unnerving flashes of images that sort of decay and stuff. Like the eyes with move in an unnatural way and start to grow, and some will be of people in the ocean, then slowly getting dragged in by a black murky substance that overtakes their body as the person's figure melts and deforms beyond recognition. I was super freaked out by these in the dream. Anyways, it stopped, and Autumn started describing these symptoms to Aaron, who apparently knew what she was going through was easily a curse, so he found a book on something called "The Ink Curse" (creative, I know -_-). They start researching it and blah blah blah, the two fall deep in love. They can't find a way to cure it, so Aaron goes onto the stage they have set up in front of several people for some reason, and Aaron pulls out the accursed ink that he somehow obtained and infects himself with it. Autumn gets a flash of the Ink world, which is really just some sort of teaser screenshot showcasing a bunch of different characters. (The Ink Demon looks hella deformed here. I thought that was funny.) That's where Act 1 ended.

Act 2 started out with a bunch of those weird flashing images I mentioned before (now that I'm writing this, I don't think that hallucination scene really happened). Blah blah blah, we're introduced to Autumn's best friend Brittany, who looks and sounds like your stereotypical mean girl but actually really cares for Autumn and would do anything to protect her. Brittany finds a way to cure Autumn's curse, so she summons Beezelbub and asks him to curse Autumn's curse and also whatever ailments she might have as well? This is done with a simple notion that I can not for the life of me remember. Autumn is cured, and Brittany is happy, so it feels like a happy ending. Except, Aaron hasn't been seen in a while. He was in for the past month, and he slowly became more sickly looking until he looked like he had been bleached. His skin looked almost grey, with a small hint of tan. Black, drippy marks started to appear on his skin or come from his skin, let bits of Ink seeping down his eye, until he eventually vanished. Despite the sudden disappearance of Aaron, everyone moved on after a few months. Autumn, on the other hand, was mildly worried. She tried to stay optimistic by hoping he had transferred to another school, but no matter what she said to calm herself, it didn't work. There was a ring at the door. Autumn left her room to go see who was there, she found that the hallway looked dingy and decaying, with bits of black liquid seeping through the walls. The door opened and a black murky figure, that was heavily deformed and had messed up features, despite still having the appearance of something almost human. It wandered through the halls looking for Autumn, it could not see its surriundings , but it could hear. Autumn eventually said something that caused the creature to come over to her location. The creature had told Autumn everything. The Inky figure turned out to be Aaron. Autumn attempted to speak to him, telling him that she knew a way to cure him, but Aaron seemed pissed off by that. He told her that he was not cursed but enlightened. That he could not go back to living blindly, as he did before. He told Autumn about his plan to drag everyone at school into the Ink, to save this godforsaken world and bring them all to a new, better place. Autumn knew she had to escape, so she left. She ran away and left him there. Hoping that she could buy herself some time to run away, get to school, and warn everyone.

She got to her school and found Brittany, she told her everything, and Brittany agreed to help sabotage his plans. It cut to what I assume was gym class because everyone was rallied up in an activity of sorts. For some odd reason, people were sitting down in metal foldable chairs. Brittany looked up and saw that there were buckets of ink, so she made sure the seats were arranged in an order so they'd be safe from the splash. When the Ink came down, it covered this one kid who never showed up again, so he was probably fine. I can't remember what happened in between here, but there was a confrontation between Aaron and Brittany. Aaron was enraged, asking if Autumn even missed him or if she even cared. Brittany yelled back and brought us to a cutscene with the two girls by the ocean on an empty part of a beach. The light waves moved back and forth against Autumn, who was crying. She missed Aaron dearly and didn't know how to go on without him. She felt incredibly guilty and let her things be taken away by the sea, slowly and gently. Brittany comforted her, telling her that it's not her fault and that there was nothing she could've done to help him. The two girls stood in the sea. Autumn let her heart out, and Brittany stood with her and made sure she felt safe. It went back to Aaron and Brittany, and she pulled out a spray bottle. Aaron taunted her, and Brittany sprayed him with bleach. He melted, and then Brittany found Autumn, and they went into town looking for a place to hide. They found a small area saying that only people of high status could enter. They bullshitted their way in and stayed until the night was over.

Prom. The cliche end of any high school movie, and this shit show is no acception. We see kidd dancing until we see an invisible man in a suit dancing on his own. For some reason, the prom looked like a ballroom for a gala. A jock went up and confronted the man, poking fun at him. The man revealed himself to be a creature of Ink (no idea if it's Aaron or not). They change into a fancy jester outfit and go on causing chaos throughout the dance. We get another look at the teaser flash thing, in which we clearly see a character from an entirely different fandom altogether... JEVIL FROM DELTARUNE?? yeah, I'm just as confused as you are man. The two cause mayhem and panic, and it ends with a scene if the two floating far above the ballroom that is in complete disarray. Then I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep, hope you enjoyed my dream.

Bonus: I remember hoping that Autumn was Allison for some reason idk

[awesomehoggirl]

Hi ! Embroidery anon here !!! Ive chosen the poem I wanna sew onto my overalls (by showing my friends all of your poems I could find (missed a few since tumblrs search engine is Just Like That) and forcing them to pick their favorite/s and then made the favorites go against eachother in a poll. This was obviously the easiest option and I definatly didn't over-complicate it. Nope.) and whiskeyclone hotel city 1997 was the winner. Im probably gonna sew it in a swamp green thread I just got but if I dont like it I have a lavander and some greys as backup. My new debate with friends is my overwhelming temptation to add lace to the bottom of a pinafor Im also reworking while all my friends are treating me like a cat that's eyeing a glass of water a little too intensly. Should I do it? Should I give into the lace temptation ? Because that pinafor is way shorter than I want (it's been sitting in my wardrobe gathering dust for 4 years now) and I need to lenghten it anyways. Least agregious (and actually kinda cute option) is lace. So should I just bite the bullet and make my friends souls die a little or should I listen to their oh so desperate pleas? (it's all in good fun, no worries about actually upsetting people with clothes, my friends and I just like to argue a lot about useless stuff kinda like a game)

OMG!!! that poem is kinda untitled tbh i just titled it with a lyric from a beck song if you want i can come up with a title for it. definitely add lace lace improves everything i love lace

[homophyte]

okay plants update. we are officially two weeks out from bringing stuff out of dormancy! started the first week of november, going to get them out the second week of february. unfortunately its still pretty cold here but the light increase should still help out until it defrosts. heres what were looking at:

this is just basically how stuff is going. i went away for like 2 weeks in late december and had a family member helping with plants but there were some issues w keeping humidity and water--nothing so serious as to cause a real problem or anything very concerning but the ampullaria is doing. uhm. i dont know what its doing but it started when i was away.

this leaf is...drunk. i guess. ive had leaves deform for low humidity before but nowhere near this much. i guess it might have been the shock of going from high to very low humidity all of a sudden making it worse when my family member had the humidifier off for a day or so to figure out how it worked but like...ive never seen this happen. its a perfectly healthy leaf so i cant really complain its just not...supposed to look like that. the basal leaves are also yellowing a lot which happened to the ventrata when it made basals and the ampullaria is making basals so im assuming its not a problem for now. speaking of, some of the basals are having the same problem:

im gonna be honest this is so weird to me. it was not doing this before and i hasnt stopped doing it since. theyre just...curly. and a little damaged on the ends. i dont know why. im thinking its probably related similarly to the humidity while they were developing but like...maybe also the lower water than usual??? cause the basals tend to curl when they need water?? i really dont know. im not worried, again, but just...what.

so heres an update on some the plants ive been taking care of for my mom:

we changed the desk it was on to use less space, and everything is good! been growing like gangbusters actually. and yes, those are flower spikes on the orchids! check it out!

should be blooming soon :)

heres the last update: pitcher growth. im not expecting much cause it is the winter and no matter what i do its gonna be colder than ideal and the sun less intense. whats weird is that most of the small pitchers i have have been growing pitchers like crazy, and i cant figure out why 1) some of them arent and 2) why the large ones arent. the ampullaria i know is going to be slow, and probably wont make pitchers until the basals are more developed....but it had undeveloped pitchers and killed them off, they never finished cooking. idk why. the pitchers on moe have been slowly dying from the tip down (ie age death, normal) which is very distressing! it might have no pitchers at all left very soon! even its basals, which are at this point huge, the size of moe when i got her at least, arent pitchering at all. the worst is the small plants that arent--the gayas and ventrata basals that were separated have huge and deeply colored pitchers.....the one thats probably a bloody mary hasnt made any and is also slowly killing its remaining pitchers. the crazy thing is theyre still making huge leaves! like, leaf jump sized, very happy, just....no pitchers! idk whats up with it! if it continues when it gets warmer thats when im gonna start worrying for now...who knows???

last thing to say about pitchers is one of the moe basals that has been really suceeding is having a minor pitcher problem idk what to do with. (note the very happy and large developing pitcher!!!)

so that grey fuzz is mold of some kind. this isnt really a big deal especially cause its on the outside of the pitcher--if it had been inside eating the decaying insects and then spread to start eating the outside of the pitcher it would be a bit of a bigger deal--ive had this happen to moe and it gets kinda gnarly, eats through the pitchers very fast. i think it only happens if the pitcher itself is already dying--the kind of fungus that would be in the pitcher eating the bugs really only eats stuff that already dead. but thats not whats going on here, so im kinda...what do i do about it??? this is a perfectly happy pitcher with a meal inside that should be nourishing the plant, that probably wont see very severe damage from the mold--but it definitely could happen. where the mold is id have to take off the whole pitcher if i did, though. heres some close ups:

can i have opinions on this?? idc if you dont have experience i just kinda need to jump one way or the other.