#the current one does NOT inspire motivation :(

[astros-arts-inthestars]

Forgot that New Year doesn't matter and what really matters is HERO BIRTHDAY!?!?!?? MAH MANNNNNNN!!!!!

Yes im drawing Omori again sorry my friend got into it and dragged me back with him. Shit

[theotherrichardpapen]

AU where Josh manages to grab onto Nigel’s hand at the last moment that night on the train and both of them fall out. AU where Nigel has been dead the entire time but Alex Forbes doesn’t know that; where the trauma of watching his friend fall to his death combined with the realisation he was complicit in the death of another causes his mind to fracture.

He doesn’t remember making it back to his dorm room that night, only remembers waking up to the news that Josh and Nigel were was dead. All of Nigel’s things have been moved to another room, of course they have, because Nigel was gone, dead, all his fault, his fault trouble.

AU where Alex takes the train one night to the Colbie house because Nigel asks him to, because he feels this innate and intense need to try and better understand this boy he got killed; where he finds the card and the books and Nigel’s red bible, and begins to understand.

AU where the body of Susan turns up one morning, and the police question Alex about it, but there’s no way it was him, because he was late; he was late, and by the time he showed up at the cinema, she was waiting for him still, sweet Susan, with her kind eyes and kinder heart, she had waited for him and she didn’t even suspect anything until the very second before he struck gone.

AU where Alex finds the letter he wrote Nigel wrote, inviting him to his house that night, where Alex sees the Colbies arguing through the window; where he wrestles the gun from John and shoots him to kill him because he read the journals, knows that this man has been hurting Nigel his whole life and he wanted him dead protect Nigel.

AU where Nigel confronts Alex at the train yard that night, where he forces Alex to remember everything he did, everything Alex did; where he forces Alex to pull the trigger and kill off the version of Nigel he’s been carrying around in his mind, where Alex dies that night right along with him and Jack is born instead.

[alienssstufff]

how do u draw clothes???? they’re so stylized and never boring

a lot of the time I use,, literally anything else other than clothes as my reference for inspiration. I use Nonon as an example:

>Studying the shape (eg: shopping basket is boxy, trashbags are puffy) >Identifying what feature of the object I like (eg: shopping basket has grid-like holes, trashbags are black and shiny in texture) >And incorporating that into clothing (eg: shopping basket skirt, trashbag blouse)

Am I saying don't use clothes your reference? Absolutely not please use clothing reference as your basepoint - these motifs are simply add-ons, ways to make your clothes look interesting

UNrelated and about Nonon herself. He's one of the overarching antagonists from THIS original story I made up :]

I designed her to have an angel/devil duality kinda look (silhouette of an angel, colour palette of the devil). Their role is kinda like a contractor to magical girls of the city but with malicious intentions.

His colour values and shapes parallel the protagonist's (Jonah's) which considering their rules and motives I thought was cool lmao

He had a life and a different name before this, the current name NONON doesn't have any proper meaning (it's nononsense!) ... but together it does look like a series of binary 101010s right?

[cosmicdream222]

Welcome ✨

Call me Cosmic. she/her. Millennial.

I blog about manifesting, loa, reality shifting, the void, etc. If that isn’t your cup of tea, peace out 👽 Asks & DMs are open as long as you are kind & respectful but please read through the FAQ before asking anything!

★ About me ★

I started making aff tapes & subliminals for myself & sharing them here on tumblr in the fall of 2023, and began posting on yt in April 2024.

YouTube channel 📌Previous pinned

Void, shifting & loa stuff compiled from others

The void explained in an old reiki book

An interview with a shifter who has been time-leaping since 2001

The void explained by a lucid dreaming instructor

Near-death experience & manifesting

Misc inspiration from loa twitter

More motivation from loa twitter

Just desire, intend & know it's possible

The universe is a giant hologram

You already have it all

Master Shifter Love Remix Series

How shifting works (the whole package)

Shifting is a law - so treat it like one

Shifting is the least special thing in the world

Shifting/manifesting is not your job

You deserve everything you want

Vanilla explains: Past Lives, Death & Afterlives

Resources, Challenges & Methods

DMT breathwork to enter the void

Wake up with your dream life: affirm & relax challenge

EFT tapping script

Manifesting is not a process challenge

What is Psych-k?

The Phase Basics

SSILD for lucid dreaming

Tips for lucid dreaming

Dream life script Google doc template

My OG void concept aff tape

My Void state subs on Google drive

Full desired appearance & beauty sub

Saturating session with my cats

FAQ: Read these before sending a question!

"Can I manifest...?"

YES. It doesn't matter what it is: the answer is always yes. You can manifest anything you want. Anything!

I will no longer be answering any questions about deadlines/time

About me & my personal experiences & successes

The time I entered the void before I knew what the void was

How do you personally manifest?

Have you entered the void?

Backstory about me and this blog

A quick example on affirming to combat negative thoughts

Success: reconnected with sp after 8+ yrs NC

My mom got super fast subliminal results?!

Manifesting/shifting/void 101

What is the state of the wish fulfilled?

A reminder not to create stories around unwanted circumstances

What is the void?

How do we manifest?

States are not a method

Persisting does not mean repetition

How do I persist properly?

Does robotic affirming work?

What is a saturating session?

Is birds before land a thing?

How do I improve my visualization skills?

How can I manifest in a scientifically proven way?

Doubts/fears/troubleshooting

The void is hard for me, any tips?

How can shifting be simple when it’s so hard for me?

Is shifting real?

What happens to my current self after shifting?

When we manifest are we shifting to a new reality?

When I manifest something, will other people see it too?

How long does it take to see results?

How can I stop obsessing about results?

I’m scared I’m abandoning/betraying people in this reality when I shift/enter the void

Why do some people fail?

What am I doing wrong?

I have doubts, what if this doesn’t work?

How do I convince the logical part of myself?

How can I ignore my toxic/negative circumstances?

What should I do if I’m overthinking?

Funnies :)

The affirming carrot

Me not reacting to 3D circumstances like

[goldenrulemotherfucker]

Real talk, I came to the Fallout series a total newb, knowing nothing about the lore/games and came away with a new favorite show, easily in my top five. In particular, something it does exceptionally well is narrative payoff. Nothing in this show happens just to happen; every choice the characters make shapes their future arcs. As a SFF writer myself, I'm not only impressed--I'm inspired.

I feel this way about the entire story, but in terms of Lucy and Cooper specifically, we get so many great payoffs from their interactions. When he doesn't share his water, it seems like he's just being a dick until we learn that his canteen is full of dirty water. (Yes, he was still being a dick, but he knew she naively thought he was drinking clean water.) When he forces her to use the knife in the "ass jerky" scene, he's absolutely being cruel, but he's also extremely fatigued to the point of near collapse, which only becomes clear only after she's out of sight at the Super Duper Mart. When he cuts off her finger, it seems like nothing more than him "getting even," when he actually took a much-needed replacement part for his hand (from someone he assumed wouldn't be alive much longer).

These interactions are all brutal, give us new insights into both characters, and also set up a massive payoff in Lucy's "golden rule, motherfucker" moment. Even after everything he put her through and how he treated her as disposable, she does the opposite and shows him empathy and kindness. To put it plainly: Her choice in this scene wouldn't carry half as much weight if he hadn't repeatedly treated her like shit. Coupled with her ability to self-rescue, the scene cements who Lucy is as a person--both for the viewer and for Cooper. (And what happens next? He watches a film clip where his old self looks right at him and delivers the line about a villain being ugly and strong but having no dignity.)

The moment when Lucy gives him the vials could have been enough of a payoff for their arc by itself. But it sets up an even better one: The next time they cross paths, he treats her differently. Having already seen himself in her, and knowing that they both want answers to the same (or very similar) questions, he invites her to accompany him on his journey this time--no longer as a pawn, but as someone he trusts and respects at least a little. As a direct payoff for her memorable act of kindness toward him, this fucking rules. It's surprising while also feeling completely earned. "Golden rule, motherfucker," isn't just a satisfying moment (or my favorite line), it shapes the characters' future.

On Lucy's side, when she decides to follow him, she has no reasons to trust or respect him (yet); she likely just recognizes that he's currently the only person who will lead her to the truth. But she's only met the Ghoul so far, not Cooper Howard. She doesn't know that his primary motivation has been searching for his family this whole time. She doesn't know that she's seen him before, in those old movies she watched at home. She doesn't know why he shot the billboard.

Now, I'm not making predictions about how their future arc will play out (nor am I asking for them), I'm just along for the ride. But I feel confident that there will be many more great payoffs to come now that they've gone from "hostile forced proximity" to "traveling together by choice." I've rarely been so pumped for a second season. <3

[prettieinpink]

how do i learn to develop JOMO? (joy of missing out)

HOW TO DEVELOP JOMO

Jomo is the joy in missing out. JOMO encourages intentional living and finding fulfilment in the present rather than seeking validation or fearing missing out on what others are doing. It celebrates the freedom and peace that comes from consciously choosing to miss out on certain social activities and trends. 

DISCONNECT. Social media is an illusion, it makes everything look better than it truly is. Not only should you put boundaries on how you manage and use your accounts, but you should also shift your mindset when using them. 

Begin to think of social media as a tool to help you become the best version of yourself. Consume content that resonates with your current life or the life you’re working towards. This will motivate you to work hard for what you want. 

EMBRACE SOLITUDE. Learn to find enjoyment in being alone. Using this time by ourselves to reflect, recharge and indulge in our pleasures allows us to connect better with ourselves. 

To get used to being alone, challenge yourself to do things that you would usually have to do with someone else, by yourself. Whether it’s eating out, studying, shopping etc. 

REFRAME YOUR MINDSET TO GRADITUDE. Someone else’s assets, skills or experiences do not take away from your own. Be thankful for what you have, and what you are going to get. 

Begin to focus on what to cherish currently, other than what you could be missing out on. A way to practice gratitude is at the end of the day, to list 5 things that you’re thankful for (and you wouldn’t trade for someone else’s life!). 

PRIORITISE YOURSELF. You should start to see that the ability to take care of yourself is a privilege that you shouldn’t ignore. Instead of saying ‘yes’ to every commitment, only go to the ones that align with you and bring genuine fulfilment. 

The times when you’re not at any commitments, use it to invest in yourself and practice some self-care rituals regularly. Your health is more important than any other event. 

BE INTENTIONAL WITH YOUR TIME. Stop chasing after every single opportunity, especially ones that do not resonate with your dream life. Only do the things that align with your values and goals. 

Stay focused on what truly matters to you. This doesn’t even have to be about going out, it applies to scrolling, laying in bed all day, or watching TV shows, do something intentional instead. 

PRACTICE DETACHMENT. Focus on you and you only. Other people’s lives, words or actions should not play a role in how your days go. It does not matter what they’re doing, you’re just wasting energy on someone who probably could not care less. 

CELEBRATE OTHER’S SUCCESS. Someone else’s success is proof that you can do it too. There is enough success for everyone, be happy that others are achieving what you want to achieve because that allows you to open up to the opportunities you want. 

GET MOTIVATED & INSPIRED INTERNALLY. While I’m all for using other people’s lives as motivation, there is a line when your life becomes misaligned with your goals and values, because that’s still someone else’s life. 

You know yourself better than anyone else. You know why you want this, and you know how you envision it. Tap into those feelings and embody them. 

[wearepaladin]

Just for fun I’m going to write an outline for an Elden Ring story I’ll never have the time or discipline to write in full, but would be fun to think about. Basically, if Elden Ring were a novel and less bound by the classic Soulsborne mechanic of everyone out to kill you all the time and you could theoretically talk to a bit more folk before they’re running at you with fire and cleavers.

So, more under the cut for those of you inclined for a bit of speculative reading.

So I think the most important thing to get out of the way is the nature of the protagonist, who we have playing the Tarnished of No Renown in this story, because while video games are a fun means of crafting your personalized to fight your way to victory in The Lands Between, for a novel a character who has a presence in the pre established narrative would be ideal. To that end, I have speculated the ToNR’s background based on what can be universally deduced about them based on where they were buried and rose from the Dead when Grace brought them back to life.

So, to that end, I critically went over the game starting zone, The Chapel of Anticipation. It was here where we are interred, along with the ashes of two stormhawks, a recently dead finger maiden, and a Grafted Scion waiting to kill us, with the chapel built on a sea stack with a bridge presumably leading to Stormveil Castle. Stormveil, as a reminder, was originally the fortress of a Storm King, a mysterious figure whose defeat by Godfrey/Hoarah Loux in single combat is considered among the First Elden Lord’s greatest achievements. So, for the sake of the story, based on this little bit of information, I am deciding that the contender for Elden Lord will be played by a Storm King resurrected by the Guidance of Grace, awakened in their tomb to find the Finger Maiden who knew that a lost king was interred here, and where a distant Scion of Godfrey, the Grafted Scion, knew where an old enemy may one day rise.

Thus, a newly risen Storm King would have been active before the existence of the Tarnished as they are now, and indeed, ignorant of much of the current history of the Lands Between and the Shattering of the Elden Ring and ensuing wars. Indeed, depending on the timeline, they would even see Marika as the empress of an invading theocracy and not the long established god queen of the setting. It allows for a protagonist who can fulfill the role of audience surrogate by needing to get caught up on everything, but gives them a more personal motivation than simple power: they are empowered by the force that had slain them and live to see the long wrought consequences of their defeat.

Drawing inspiration from the others titled Storm King in Fromsoftware games, and the nature of Stormveil as the largest and most heavily fortified castle in the game, (arguably anyway) I’m imagining the Storm culture as martial but somewhat isolationist since we don’t see much of their influence beyond what scant remains of their legacy can be found in the castle. The Storm King thus did not combat the Golden Order until Godfrey bested them personally.

The protagonist would then have very personal reasons for removing Godrick from Stormveil castle, not to take his great rune but their ancient home. But in the process of doing so, they meet Melina and the Roundtable Hold, opening doors to a greater understanding of what’s been going on and granting motivation to not just retake Stormveil, but to adress the broken state of the world.

The story the largely goes on as it does in the game: most of the major powers that still remain would be even less inclined to parley with the Storm King than they would some Tarnished with no Renown, but there are some key differences. Limgrave’s population would have a monarch of ancient stock to gather those Sane enough to reside in the safely of Stormveil. The world doesn’t remain static and we see the side of lordship as more than being a godkilling machine, but someone who can lead and have people follow.

Godrick, Radahn, and Rykard are still slain as the three would never be able to be talked down, as they are either determined pretender, ill beyond care, or intending to devour the world respectively. Renalla is never fought as her situation never required a violent resolution. Morgott’s situation becomes much more complex, as while still quite hostile, the growing political influence the Storm King would amass in Limgrave, Liurnia and even remnants of the Redmane army swearing allegiance after the death and liberation of General Radahn, would force a more politically intriguing conflict.

I think that the Storm King would learn that the Erdtree is sealed by thorns by either “diplomacy”’(shouting matches) with Morgott or an intrigue plot involving Black Knives at war with eachother, and lead to the events of the DLC as the SK decides they are unwilling to risk freeing Frenzied Flame or having Melina sacrificed, whatever her willingness. He instead follows a third option, and goes the Lands of Shadow, seeking not Miquella, but Messmer. This would be the beginning of the second book in a theoretical trilogy, as the events in SotE would require the space Rand still culminate with the failed apotheosis of Miquella.

However, as the SK would not arrive in the Lands of Shadow alone, but with political authority tying him to Liurnia and other Golden Order factions, Messmer’s army, having awaited eons for word from home, is receptive enough to allow the SK to engage diplomatically with Rellana and eventually Messmer. Messmer learns of the current status of the Lands Between, meets his sister Melina for the first time, and decides to call off the Crusade after the failed Apotheosis of Miquella. Using his abyssal flame, he then takes his sister’s place at the Mountaintop of Giants, bringing Flame of Mesmer to the tree his mother built her empire from.

While this is happening, the Stormking goes through their own personal journey of discovery as with both the actions committed by the Golden Order and the Hornsent in turn, they find that themself asking the hard question of whether their kingdom’s isolationist policies contributed to the pogroms and cycles of violence by inactivity: could so much harm have been avoided if they or their ancestors been less hostile to the greater lands of the world?

The story then concludes as the ancient powers that have long manipulated behind the scenes interject from various angles as Metyr, the Ancient Dragons, The Frenzied Flame and the Rot all instigate their own attempts regain control of the lands between, with various part of the assembled cast facing their respective foes, Ranni and her Allies facing Metyr and the Fingers, Millicent and remnants Miquella’s followers taking control of their destiny at the Haligtree by facing the Goddess of Rot, Melina and Morgott combining their power against the corrosive influence of Shabriri and the Chaos Flame.

All the while Storm King faces first the Dragons at Farum Azula, revealing ancient ties between the dragons and the Stormking that culminate in a duel between them and Placidusax, and then a rematch between Godfrey and The Storm King, culminating in the final battle against the powers hidden in The Erdtree itself

Then, I think, a variant on the Age of Stars ending would occur. Altered to include influence from the Duskborn and Order endings.

[writing-with-sophia]

Writing a novel: Step by step

Most writers aspire to publish at least one book in their lifetime, but writing a novel is not easy. From new writers to experienced writers who have published hundreds of books, everyone must follow a step-by-step process to create their work. These steps are based on the wisdom of famous writers, so while they may not be entirely definitive, they will certainly be helpful to you.

Step 1: Generate ideas

Start by generating ideas for your novel. This can involve brainstorming, keeping a journal of potential story concepts, or drawing inspiration from real-life experiences, books, movies, or current events.

Once you get an idea, hone it.

Step 2: Create characters

A novel cannot be successful without unique and charming characters. Create compelling and well-rounded characters for your novel. Develop their backgrounds, motivations, personalities, and relationships. Consider their strengths, flaws, and how they will evolve throughout the story.

Remember, the more realistic the characters, the better the novel will be.

Step 3: Build setting

Establish the setting or world in which your novel takes place. Whether it's a real location or a fictional world, provide enough descriptive details to immerse readers and make the setting feel vivid and believable.

Step 4: Define plot and make an outline

What is your story about? How will it unfold? How does it begin, develop, and conclude? What and how many scenes will be included? Make an depth and very depth outline, even going so far as to outline every chapter.

Step 5: Write

Begin writing your first draft. Don't worry about perfection; the goal is to get the story down on paper. Embrace the creative process and let the ideas flow. Please remember, don't go back and make changes. Just write!

Step 6: Revise and edit

Once the first draft is complete, take a break (for 3 days) before revising and editing. (This will keep you from overediting or not editing enough.) Then, read through your manuscript with a critical eye, focusing on plot holes, inconsistencies, pacing, character development, and overall storytelling. Revise and rewrite sections as needed.

Step 7: Get beta readers

(You must) seek feedback from trusted individuals, such as beta readers, writing critique groups or your friends. Their input can provide valuable perspectives on areas that may need improvement. Consider their suggestions while maintaining your unique voice and vision for the story.

Step 8: Polish and refine

Polish and refine your novel based on the feedback received. Pay attention to sentence structure, grammar, punctuation, and overall prose. Ensure clarity and coherence in your writing.

Step 9: Publish

You can research different publishing options, such as traditional publishing or self-publishing. Remember to evaluate the pros and cons of each approach and decide which is the best fit for your goals and circumstances.

That's all. I hope you success in publishing your novel!!

If you want to read more posts about writing, please click here and give me a follow!

[etherfabric]

Encouragement from your Spirit Guides

Choose a pile by which picture you resonate with the most.

If your mind is too busy to clearly decide, take a few deep breaths, and use the finger of your non-dominant hand to hover over the images. One will give off the most subtle yet prominent signals, like tingles, a magnetic pull, or temperature. This is your pile. Multiples are also possible.

You are the ultimate authority over your life. I merely provide my perspective. Sometimes the Universe lines you up with something that doesn't resonate with your truth, so you have contrast to find out what does. Never give away your power.

Pile 1

The Fool, 9 of Swords

Ditch the phrase "Do it scared." When you bulldoze through your fear, you hurt yourself. It is a part of you that you will never transcend, because you need it. You can't expect any sustainable outcome from this violent approach. Your Spirit Guides see your efforts and want you to know that you hit the mark a long time ago already, and they are doing all they can to line you up with more positive experiences. They don't want you to use force against your most vulnerable parts for the sake of progress that is not even due yet.

You were told by misguided people that you are too sensitive, too slow, too lazy when you feel comfortable. This is not the case. The Universe likes slow. It likes gentle, loving approaches. It will meet you where you are at. Trust in your innate worth of good things, and don't whip yourself to places and situations you aren't ready for. Good things will come - for example the much calmer state of mind you will have once you don't betray your own trust anymore by ignoring your boundaries. You deserve kindness, patience and everything you need to feel safe. Listen to your fear. It needs your love.

Pile 2

Strength, King of Cups

Standing ovation for your emotional resilience! Your Spirit Guides are so freaking proud of you. You found a place within yourself where you can watch the waters of your soul ebb and flow in sovereignty. Even the stormiest currents can't rock you enough to lose your focus on what's important to you. You exude an air of compassion towards yourself that is inspiring.

What you deemed impossible and beyond your depth not so long ago is now already second nature to you. What an evolution to witness! Take pride in the thousands of conscious impulses that led you here. Let the imposter syndrome swim its laps, you know where it stems from, and you know that's not the whole story.

Beware of your knack for arrogance, the other end of that spectrum, and the future looks peachy.

Pile 3

The World, The Moon

Your Spirit Guides want you to know that there is closure to a deep rooted doubt on the horizon. They way you are carrying yourself in the last few days is amicable, and benefits the integration of one of your deepest wounds. Healing comes in many forms, and you have experienced a good handful of them already. Buckle up for a whole new variant of dimension in this regard - things you deemed lost forever will be ever so close to your grasp again and provide you with a surge of motivation you couldn't imagine before.

When the shadows of the past cloud your judgement, hold onto the smidge of light creeping through, especially when it seems like a lukewarm joke that just can't be true. From the perspective of despair, hope always seems ridiculous. Well, get a little silly, then. Dancing naked might sound like the worst humiliation, but only to those who haven't tasted that kind of freedom yet. Get ready to hear the music soon.

Pile 4

Two of Pentacles, Queen of Swords

Oh how you are chopping down that bullshit quickly! No time for nonsense is written all over your forehead, and for the metaphorically illiterate, you have no trouble spelling it out ever so clearly. Your Spirit Guides are in awe of your determination when it comes to your boundaries. You are loyal to your highest principles, no matter what. You know for certain that your wants and needs have a valid foundation, and you won't tolerate any projected shame on that part.

In the past, people could drag you into psychological tug-of-wars that left you off balance either way, whether you "won" or "lost". Now you smell that game from a mile away and don't even touch that rope. Just one little advice: Choose your battles. Not every boundary has to be set in stone, and not every crossing of one is a fundamental failure on your part you have to avoid at all costs, or else. Humans are multitudes of parts, all with their own unique set of requirements, and context is always a factor.

But still, look at you and how far your shadow work around speaking up has taken you! Who would've thought that one day you would need a reminder that soft is okay, too? ;)

[petrichor-han]

easier; yoon jeonghan

PAIRING | jeonghan x afab!reader

CAST | yoon jeonghan

WC | 2.3k

GENRE | angst, fwb, lovers to exes

WARNINGS | explicit language, non-explicit sexual content (kissing, removing clothes, touching), alcohol consumption, toxic relationship, bad coping mechanisms, mentions of throwing up (due to intoxication)

SYNOPSIS | inspired by the song "easier" by 5SOS // he's your ex, and nothing more. that's what you tell all of your dates, and also what you tell yourself when you find yourself crying in your bathroom drunk at three in the morning. it would make your life infinitely better if you just let him go and moved on, but it's just not that easy to escape the devil in the form of yoon jeonghan.

A/N | uhhh hi everyone!! i doubt this will get any reach but hopefully someone will read this and enjoy it :,) i'm trying to get more comfortable with writing shorter fics so i can keep publishing while i'm in school and it's less pressure!

request to be added to current and future taglists HERE!

MASTERLIST | RAIN’S PLAYLIST

Your head pounds to the beat of the music, which is now much too loud for your liking, though it was just fine five minutes ago. Clinging to the grimy, slippery wall of the club bathroom stall, you slowly sink to the ground, feeling a wave of nausea overcome you, both from the tequila shots you’d chugged earlier and the smell of used tampons (you’d realized too late that you knelt down next to the sanitary product disposal). You fight the urge to cling to the porcelain bowl to steady yourself, repeating, it’s filthy, don’t touch it, over and over in your mind as you sway, trying to avoid falling over onto the sticky floor without touching any of the equally disgusting surroundings. Somehow, you manage, and the nausea disappears for a moment. Long enough for you to whip your phone out of your sweaty strapless bra and sloppily text your friends that you’re in the bathroom and probably need help getting out. And getting home. 

Then, your eyes linger on the last message you’d gotten from another contact. One that doesn’t have a profile picture, nor a name that the number is saved under. Even so, you know the number by heart. You recognize the area code when you see it in other places. When you see those combinations of numbers in your day-to-day life, sometimes you feel a lump forming in your throat, and you have to swallow past it and pretend like it doesn’t feel like your lungs are caving in on your chest.

The message is nothing special. It isn’t especially long or meaningful, and especially not something that you’re saving for sentimental value. No, the only reason it’s there is because you’re too much of a damn coward to actually block the number, and he’s too much of a narcissistic freak to leave you alone, even though you’ve been broken up for almost a year. 

An entire damn year. That’s how much time you’ve wasted on this man, and that isn’t even counting the time you actually spent in a relationship with him. 

Coming to this realization, you feel a sudden wave of motivation, coupled with the anxiety-inducing feeling of sobering up and realizing you’ve been hunched over in a sketchy club bathroom by yourself for the past twenty minutes, too drunk to even realize how gross it really is. You decide that this is your sign to call it a night, and seeing that your friends have responded to your text immediately, you simply shoot them another, telling them you’re going home, instead of venturing back out into the jungle-like atmosphere of the club, filled to the brim with animals looking to pounce–figuratively, of course. Though, the man by the entrance of the club with an intense amount of hair gel and a leopard print bow tie did somewhat resemble a hungry predator. 

You start to call for an Uber, but somehow your fingers dial his number instead. He picks up so fast your heart skips a beat, and you’re pissed off that it still does that–that he still has such an effect on you. You can’t even control it when the words start tumbling out of your mouth: how drunk you are, how you’re alone right now outside, your location… and finally, how much you miss him. He listens to you, and somehow without even saying a word he sounds smug. You feel guilt and shame pooling in your stomach as you pour your heart out to this man, who really couldn’t give less of a shit about you any more. He just likes the attention. He likes knowing that you still pine for him, and can’t be with anyone else because you only want him, even after a year of being apart. It’s flattering. It strokes his already stupidly oversized ego. You know this, yet you keep talking, until you’re suddenly sobbing. 

“Baby, you don’t have to cry. I’m on my way already, you know that, right?” he asks, his voice smooth and even as he comforts you nonchalantly. Perhaps that’s the worst part, how easily he seems to acknowledge your bitter feelings, and not care at all. He’s smart. He knows what he’s doing, how much he’s hurting you. You wonder if it hurts him too. 

You hiccup, still feeling tipsy. You didn’t throw up those tequila shots when you were in the bathroom earlier, and you can feel them swirling and burning in your stomach. You start to hunch over the side of the road, bending over the curb as you feel the burning sensation crawling up your throat. 

And suddenly, as humiliating as it is to admit, you’re throwing up all over the street, your vomit the color of the liquor you consumed, and completely liquid. You choke on it, because you haven’t learned your lesson that it burns twice as much coming back up, and feel it dripping from your nose. Disgusting, you think. I’m fucking disgusting. 

As you wallow in your self-pity and puddle of vomit, you feel a gentle, cool cloth pressing to your cheek, and for a moment you hope you’ve died and this must be an angel caressing your cheek before you ascend elsewhere. But as you look up, you see him–Jeonghan–and perhaps, bathed in the wane yellow lighting of his headlights, he is the closest thing to an angel on planet Earth. Certainly, he is ethereal enough–his blonde hair has grown out more, but he’s kept up with his roots, making the entirety of his flowing locks a pale white-blonde. His face, so smooth and pale in the cool night air, is so familiar and warm, even though he isn’t smiling, not even close. And his hands–his thin, bony hands, cool to the touch beneath his handkerchief as he presses it to your face, cleaning the bile that dribbles from your lips that you’re too lazy and intoxicated to wipe off yourself. 

“How did you get here so fast?” you ask, feeling embarrassed as soon as you speak; your words are much more slurred than you thought they’d be. Are you really still this drunk? 

“I still have your location,” he says simply, as if it’s normal. As if it’s not weird to be checking your ex’s location at two in the morning. He helps you stand up, and as you wobble, he resorts to just picking you up. You feel his lean muscles flexing beneath his thin shirt, and you sigh. He’s always been stronger than he looks, and you loved the way he made you feel weightless when he lifted you. 

He helps you into the passenger seat and does your seatbelt up for you. He hands you a bag, knowing you might feel sick again despite the short drive, and starts on his way back to your place. This makes you feel even more miserable–he used to take you back to the place you shared together, once. And then he would take you back to his place. But now, he doesn’t even stay the night with you. Lately, you’ve been worrying that one day, he’ll stop coming at all. But then again, as you look over at him and his easy smile, his almost lazy grip on the steering wheel as he speeds way past the limits down the road, perhaps not. After all, it’s not always you that calls first. Half the time it’s you picking him up somewhere as he looks up at you, with apathetic eyes as he clamps his lips shut, frustrating you to no end–he asked for you to come get him, so why can’t he talk to you? 

But tonight, you’re the pathetic one, the loser. He pulls up in front of your place, and he helps you out. He unlocks your door–he still has the key to your apartment on his keychain–and helps you inside. Neither of you say anything as he helps you undress, not trying to hide how his gaze lingers on your bare skin before he pulls your pajamas on. He even knows how to remove your makeup, and you sit on the edge of the bathtub in the flickering yellow light as he gently wipes away your cosmetics, one hand gently cupping your chin to hold your face steady. That gentle touch makes your breath hitch, and he notices. He pauses his movements, pulling the cotton pad away from your face, and looks into your eyes. You can’t tell what he’s thinking, and a flicker of doubt arises in your stomach. 

But then, like it’s nothing, he leans forward and captures your lips with his, his grip on your chin strengthening ever so slightly as he pulls you closer towards him, greedily. It’s selfish, the way he so eagerly kisses you, like he’s starved. Like he’s been missing you, and craving your touch–like only you could satisfy this carnal craving. You know it isn’t true, and it’s likely that numerous people have been in and out of the bed that you once shared with Jeonghan, but you like to pretend like it’s the truth. It eases the pain, that deep gnawing pain that only grows and never shrinks when you imagine Jeonghan with someone else. 

That’s why you kiss him back so desperately, matching his pathetic energy perfectly. The two of you cling to each other like two fools, dancing around the idea of what if instead of just giving it a try. Still, neither of you speak, your lips too busy pressed together in an animalistic frenzy. You feel dizzy with intoxication, both from alcohol and from Jeonghan, as you straddle him, whining softly as he bites your lower lip teasingly. 

But then, he pushes you away. Your heart stops. “We can’t,” he says softly, and for the first time, you see a hint of raw emotion behind those large, angelic eyes. He’d always been able to hide how he felt around you, no matter what he was going through. You bite your tongue as you ponder, why now? Why does he care more now? 

“Why not?” you ask, your tone coming across as much more wounded than intended. 

Jeonghan looks at you, surprised at the emotion in your voice. “You know why,” he says hastily, pulling away further. With every inch that he backs away, you feel another piece of your heart shattering. 

“It hasn’t stopped you before,” you say bitterly, crossing your arms. “Why do you suddenly care about fucking me after we’ve broken up?” 

“Maybe, I’m seeing someone,” he says suddenly, hesitating slightly after he says maybe. You feel your breath catch in your throat. It feels like you can’t breathe. Suddenly, you feel nauseous again, but when you gag, nothing physically happens. In your mind, you’re screaming, spewing everywhere. Your stomach clenches painfully. 

“Maybe? So you are seeing someone?” you say, trying not to cry. The liquor isn’t helping–it always makes you feel more emotional, even when nothing’s wrong. 

“It’s not serious yet, but I want to see where this goes,” he admits, sighing. He leans back against the wall of your bathroom. He doesn’t look like he belongs there–he’s too beautiful to be seen amongst an off-white wall bathed in pale yellow lighting, surrounded by cracks and chips in the crappy paint job. “So this… all of this, has to stop. Tonight.” 

You swallow hard. You can tell he’s looking at you, trying to gauge your reaction, but for once you’re stoic. You feel completely numb, all of that initial hurt and pain long gone. More than anything, you feel uncomfortable with the way he’s observing you, like he’s expecting you to make a scene or get really emotional. Instead, you just nod. “Okay,” you say. “It ends tonight.” 

He nods too. And really, he should have gotten up and left after that, leaving it at that. But the both of you knew better than that, and he stayed there, sitting on your perpetually damp bathroom rug and not complaining though mildew-scented water was surely soaking through his expensive slacks. 

Slowly, you move closer to him. He doesn’t advance towards you, but he doesn’t move away either. He calmly keeps an eye on you as you inch closer, and once you’re right beside him, he takes the initiative and kisses you again. It’s softer this time, more gentle, and you worry that this is because it’s your last. So you pull him close and deepen the kiss, making it messy and sloppy like it usually is when there is a guaranteed next time. He mirrors your actions, and it gives you a sense of familiarity and comfort, even though you know it’s a false sense. He would not be coming back after tonight. 

You make the most of your emotionless state, feeling a physical desire stronger than any emotion could make you want to stay away. The two of you don’t even bother to move to the bedroom, just a few feet away, before you start removing each other’s clothing in a frenzy, leaving them strewn all over your bathroom. Only when you’re clad in just a pair of panties does he pick you up, pressing hot kisses to your sensitive neck and making you shiver as he carries you to the bedroom, throwing you down on the bed. 

There’s that familiar look in his eye as he looks down at you, that hungry gaze that he always lays upon you before he devours you. As his fingers hook beneath the waistband of your panties, you lock eyes with him, trying to memorize every single detail of that expression–both because you know you’ll never see it again, and because you know for sure now that there’s someone else seeing it too. Yet, he dives in again, bringing you to the same heights only he knows how to accomplish, and you know that even though it’d be easier to just let go, there’s no way you possibly can.

© petrichor-han 2024, all rights reserved  

[astroyongie]

꒷꒦︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ࣭ ⭑꒷꒦ Kpop Tea Part 1. ꒷꒦︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ࣭ ⭑꒷꒦

Note: there's the list of some teas to celebrate my come back <3 This first part is only concerning female idols! WARNINGS: All names are censured. Requests with emojis asking for names won't be answered. Some tea can be sensitive. One X per member per group. Take it lightly EVERYTHING DONE THROUGH TAROT!

Red Velvet

X has made decisions for the continuation of her career and it does seem like she will not renovate her contract.

X's idol image and self is totally different from her real person. she often finds conflict in hiding this, but she is also an idol for so long that she tends sometimes to take her idol image too seriously

X is the type of person that keeps walking in the path of trauma and putting herself in situations that recall her of her trauma (coping mechanism at most), repetition of cycles. She calls for that storm way too much

X has a hard time making peace with her past

X has been struggling with her mental health a lot, although she seems like she has been holding on well, what she posts on social media does not correspond to her reality

Blackpink

X has everything in her power, a lot of people at her feet (mostly because she collected a lot of dirt on people). but at what cost? sometimes her actions are very contradictory to what she preaches

X has not been very fair with people around her, her behaviors are irrational, she doesnt question herself on her actions. x has also been struggling with addictions

X has one goal on her head and she doesn't care how much she has to sacrifice to get that for herself

Funny, how X can seem like the idol who loves this life the most when in reality she is hanging by a thread and music isn't her thing anymore

Aespa

X isn't the person she says she is. everything you know about her through the company is a masquerade, a mask to wear as an idol and not as a person. her personal life is not known in the public life

X has been playing this role of idol for so long that she often forgets about herself and about who she truly is.

X is waiting currently, waiting for a way out of her current situation

X is probably one of the female idols who has the most flings/one night stands with other idols

Gidle

X might have got pregnant at one point this year. this has been dealt with

X has yet to forget a lot of the awful memories that still haunt her.

X has probably the best outcome when it comes to being an idol. it seems like her future is bright and that her projects (solo and others that she will reveal) will all come to success

X might sem lazy sometimes but she has got the most motivation when it comes to being an idol

X is still in love with her ex from long time ago. to her it was the love of her life and despite having moving on, the feeling is dormant

Itzy

X has a lot of inspiration when it comes to her artistic side but the company doesnt really take her advices into consideration

X has made changes on herself in order for people to notice her more

X has been very serious about everything when it comes to her job, she has pushed the bad habits aside to focus plenty on herself and her professional domain

the company has been protecting X from a huge scandal

X is stuck in a cycle when it comes to her idol image. doesnt matter what she does, she wont ever erase what people know her for

Twice

X understand all the endgames of what an idol and what her contracts gives her which is the reason she wont ever stop it until JYP decides otherwise

X has been engaged for the past weeks

X self medicates a lot to control her own inner demons and issues

X might use pleasure as a way to cope with her pain and also in a way to feel validated by people

X's physical and mental health have been better compared to what it was a few years ago

X's is filthy rich, not because of her job but because of the dirt she has on people

X will be traveling for a project so keep your eyes open

the struggles that X is going through at the moment could shook the internet

X is also preparing for a solo

Le Sserafim

X is way more balanced lately for the past months, she isn't the same person she used to be. she has grown a lot

X has been having conflicts with the other members but also with the company staff. she has been too passive about it as well

X is in a loving relationship with a very well known idol. true ship?

X should be super careful with three things. 1- she shouldn't drive.., 2- she could get her ankle hurt during dancing practice or a performance, 3- her current path isnt the one for her

X is a very sweet girl but she is often mistaken due to her image and due to people's quick judgement

IVE

X will take action for something that Is very important. keep an eye open

x's influence on the other members is huge (I want to say that this is not Wonyoung). she could flip the whole group upside down if she wishes

X is devoted to her current partner, and she has been working to please them and not for some type of recognition

X's tea is a little too complex, too harsh. it involves a lot of endings that I shouldn't be explaining

X's mother has been the big influence in her life and actually taking in the reins to protect her daughter

X's seem to be having a lot of luck lately, especially when it comes to her career

[dailyadventureprompts]

Hey Dapper! As an avid follower of- and equally avid inspiration-taker from your work, first of all, thank you for the work you've put into all this. It is a treasure-trove of knowledge and inspiration that has certainly made me very happy. Can I ask for your thoughts on Tharizdun? I've been trying to form a concept of it for in my own world, but I've had little success.

Monsters Reimagined: Tharizdun, the Whisperer in Darkness

Being the default "god of madness" Tharizdun brings together two of my enduring gripes with d&d: gods that no one would actually worship and the enduring legacy of depicting people with mental illness as dangerous lunatics devoid of empathy and reason.

As he currently exists in the DM's toolbox, the whole point of including Tharizdun in your campaign is to act as the powersource behind whichever final fantasy style endboss wants to start the apocalypse before unleashing a mass of offband lovecraftian tentacles. Derivative, trite, his singular desire to inspire others to end the world is MCU levels of failing to give villains proper motivations.

We can do better

TLDR: Far In the wildest depths of the astral sea the ur-god Tharizdun is formless and thoughtless, yet dreaming. Resembling nothing so much as a cosmic nebula of oily clouds, a vast and shapeless expanse of churning primordial chaos that pulses with synapses of psychic lighting containing a consciousness older than time itself. Like a sleeper beset with sleep paralysis the chained oblivion thrashes against a reality it can only barely perceive, sending shockwaves of destruction across the cosmos.

While scholars of all worlds debate the true origins and nature of Tharizdun they can agree on two things:

It is more powerful than all the pantheons of creation, and it is terrified.

Inspiration: I wasn't originally going to do a whole monsters reimagined on Tharizdun, instead simply gesturing on what Matt Mercer has done with the deity (using the roiling chaos as a throughline for much of his Exandrian worldbuilding) and leaving it at that.

Around the same time I got this ask though I was considering doing my own take on Azathoth, the so called "blind idiot god" of the lovecraft mythos, inspiration struck and I decided to alloy the two concepts into what I think is a stronger whole. There's a lot of overlap in the two formless horrors, partly due to Tharizdun being a d&d's attempt to dip its toe into eldritch horror, without quite understanding the thematic framework involved.

Like many other things ( Minorities, the sea, decay, air conditioning) Lovecraft was terrified of objective reality. This might sound like a joke, but fundamental to his mythos is the fear that earth and the white men that lived upon it were not the centre of the universe created by a loving god. Lovecraft lived in increasingly scientific times and the science supported the idea of a universe in which humanity's existence was the meaningless product of random chance. Azathoth was this anxiety embodied in its most extreme scale: the capital G god of the universe which sat in the middle of all creation that was not only uncaring towards humanity (as many of Lovecraft's creations were) but the embodiment of ultimate unthinking chaos.

Trying to port Azathoth (and most of the other lovecrafitan pantheon) doesn't work because the conceits of the genre fundamentally clash. D&D DOES propose a moral universe, and goes out of its way to simplify morality down to such a cartoonish level that it has objective answers. In Lovecraft the horror comes from the fact that the cultists and their fucked up alien gods exist, where as the moral christian god doesn't... in d&d there's no reason for the cultists to worship the fucked up alien gods because the regular gods are both existent and quite nice.

The default d&d cosmology has multiple infinite voids of chaos including limbo, the abyss, and the far realm. I've already given my take on one of these, but I wanted an alternative for the origins of the weird that wasn't specifically focused on entropic decay.

There's a fascinating (and very depressing) history over the term hysteria and the connotations of mental crisis with feminine fragility. The word itself comes from the greek word for womb and there's something about the idea of "primal birthing chaos" that's worth playing with insofar as it makes weird rightoids Jordan Peterson deeply afraid.

Taking these thoughts as well as my earlier gripes in mind, its going to take a bit of an overhaul to make Tharizdun/Azathoth as a credible antagonistic force for a campaign. Also, this might be my own bias as an author showing through here but I don't go in for the lovecrafitan "truths too terrible to be understood". I think the universe is a fundamentally knowable place and if things exist outside our means of perceiving them then we'll just bullrush through and work out a temporary explanation on our way.

Here's my Fix/Pitch: Both Tharizdun and Azathoth are supposed to represent primordial chaos and formless madness. D&D's less than stellar history with mental health issues aside, we know that "madness" isn't evil and it isn't the antithetical opposite of order: It's flawed reason, it's an inability to comprehend, and it's deeply scary for those going through it.

THAT ended up reminding me of a famous quote from lovecraft himself; "The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown".

What if we make THAT FEAR into the god? Imagine the panicked sensation of being woken from the deepest slumber by a sudden noise, the door opening or a loud bang going off somewhere on your street..... the phantom horror of something touching you, crawling over you in the middle of the night before you have any of your senses or reason or memory to tell you that it's just your partner or your pet or your own bed sheets. That's the stuff sleep paralysis is made of and it's been haunting us humans since the dawn of time. It's also the same horror of being born, of being a non-thing and then coming into existence in fits and starts without any understanding of the world that you're now

Now imagine there's something out there in the astral sea, the plane of dreams and thoughts... powerful beyond all imagining but created without the ability to ever fully wake up. It is stuck in that first moment of existence because it may well have been the first thing to ever exist and it's been trapped in the shapeless nightmare of an infant since the dawn of time

THAT is how you make a god about the horror of the unknown. A god that is antagonistic to us because it is sacred of us, and it is scared because it has no way of knowing us, knowing the reality it inhabits beyond its own fear.

Adventure Hooks:

The greatest threat Tharizdun presents to most beings in the universe is having a nightmare about them. Through the inexplicable paths of sleep an individual's mind may find themselves connected to the entity's own... receiving terrible visions as the thinking clouds of Tharizdun's body churn in a variable brainstorm. Some aspect of this communion will be twisted into something terrible, birthed into the cosmos with the same shrieking fear and confusion that inspired its creation. Some desperate few seek out this communion, thinking in their hubris that they can give shape to Tharizdun's creation, that the terror beyond time suffers collaborators or requests. (Yes, I'm yoinking the dream-spawning ability of beholders. They were already weird enough before they started getting involved with dream stuff)

Despite being a living entity, Tharizdun is also a place, a plane unto itself streaking through the multiverse like a collossal ameoba through the primordial soup. There are landscapes within the god, whole continents that form and erode through seasons of surreality as the paroxyc titan dreams them into being. One can create portals into these landscapes, even fly a jammership across them, but the act of doing so invites an even more chaotic backlash than visiting the chained oblivion in dreams, letting its terror leak out into the waking worlds.

The name "chained oblivion" dates back to an eon when forces of celestial order attempted to keep Tharizdun contained in the hopes of preventing the escape of its creations or its contact with other minds. This period of the multiverse oft refereed to as the "Time of Quiet" sadly came to an end when the entity's bindings were shattered by a collective of villains and horrors today refereed to as the "Court of Fools" or "Troupe of the Final Void". The Troupe are a motley bunch, unable to agree on a theology but all wanting to pick at the slumbering titan like it was a scab on the skin of heaven. Some serenade Tharzidun with cacophonous music, others hurl saints and sacrifices into its body, some worship or hunt the god's offspring while others stab it with cosmic pokers, just to get a reaction. They want to wake the chained oblivion and don't care how much of the multiverse they have to burn to do it.

Like a mollusc producing pearls as a means of containing an irritating bit of grit, Tharizdun's roiling cosmic body will occasionally spit out an entire world or strange demiplanes as a means of dislodging something it could not pallet. While this has been the genesis of many realms both beautiful and terrible throughout the astral timeline, of late all these worlds worth taking have been colonized by the Troupe. Woe and pity to any mortal who calls such a world home, ruled over by tyrants who care only for destruction, unaware of a cosmos not coloured by Tharizdun's wake.

Titles: The chained oblivion, the spiraling titan, sire of stars, the Paroxsmal god, Lord of all Hysterics.

Signs: Stormclouds that look oily and churn with otherworldly light, formless nightmares and pervasive sleep paralysis, mass delusion, darkness that echoes with the god's muttering and the sound of distant flutes.

Worshippers: Ad hoc worship of Tharizdun tends to congregate around those who have received unwanted visions of the chained oblivion, as the harrowing experiance often bestows those that suffer it with an otherworldy weight to their words, to say nothing of occasional psychic powers. Many abberations likewise pay heed to the chained oblivion, either for directly giving them life or for its great and insuppressable power. Among these include Grell who refer to Tharizdun as "storm mother", The nightmarish Quori follow in the wake of the god's psychic emanations and make up a large faction of the court of fools, and the Kaorti, terrifying mage-things remade by exposure to the spiralling titan's heart who claim to be heralds for the entity.

Art

[degreedummy]

Looking at Luke's Current Transits-

25° Virgo Sun sextile Pluto around Sept. 18 This transit is one that brings focus toward his sense of confidence, and specifically his ability to lead. I’d expect this to be a personal transit for him, challenging his ability to make hard decisions, but this could also mean voicing decisions about his future. I think this can be a time for him showing appreciation for the love he receives, maybe saying it’s built his confidence. In the same way Nicola has, this could be his time for talking about the ways he takes care of himself, the things he likes or what he does to keep his head on straight, maybe more focusing toward mental health. 14° Cancer Mars square Jupiter Sept. 29 Coming in after his exact Mars return, this has big ‘getting away’ energy, or… ‘going back home to escape reality’, running back to comforts in some way. This energy can cause conflict, but this could also speak to him feeling inspired, or finding some kind of inspiration that he’s been missing out on. I think memories of home will play a big part here. More than finding inspiration, I think this square is going to bring his future into question, asking him what kind of life he wants to be able to come home to. More than a personal transit, I think this will be a time of him rebuilding the circle around him. Jupiter retrograde begins in his 11H lasts until early February Jupiter going retrograde in his 11H shows to me that, following filming and whatever ties he has to Bridgerton after, he may start to lock down on who uses his name, or who he allows to profit from him. The 11H is a social house, but as a public figure, his relationship with his [community] may be intentionally challenged. When I see this transit, I see someone choking out a fire, seeing what’s left behind when he doesn’t give any more. The 11H also represents dreams, and I think there’s a noticeable, continuous theme, leading him to question what he wants to do next. I think this speaks to him… having opportunities ahead of him, but being frozen in how to act. I think the 11H is a house that’s easy to lose yourself in, especially as the planet of exploration goes retrograde in it, but I think this will be the time for him to question what he, as an individual, wants for his future, and what he’s willing to do for it.

5H Venus transit, Scorpio and Sagittarius through October The 5H being our sense of creativity, a love for art seems to be reestablished during this time, expressed in a different way. I think this transit could be as simple as him posting pictures of little pieces he’s painted, just showing he’s expanded on his hobbies, but I think this is a motivating period for him. I could see him getting more personal, but that depends on if his [art] relies on being seen. Honestly, I don’t think the transits show him doing a lot of work immediately following filming, but based off transits, I think this a necessary time for him to decide what matters to him. Him taking time to find direction only benefits him in the long-run here.

Saturn direct in his 9H November 15 Another transit he shares with the rest of us, I think this transit and many before speak to him finding a voice he doesn’t feel he’s allowed to have. The 9H tends to represent someone’s spiritual beliefs, someone’s religion, but it can also represent political and even personal beliefs, the morals a person has and what they personally believe to be right in the world. Based on the kind of person he is, I wouldn’t expect him to break out in an argument with anyone, but I do think this could be a time of ‘picking sides’, understanding that he has to stand for [something] in the world if anything matters to him at all. With Saturn going direct, think of it as… “I’m willing to lose an opportunity if it means moving forward with a clear mind”, him feeling a need to speak out on something that we may not yet know is important to him.

Sagittarius Mercury rx, goes direct in his 5H mid December While I do think the retrograde will have significance, I think Mercury going direct in his 5H, after all we’ve discussed, shows an opportunity being acted on. At the time of writing, I don’t know his status with contracts, who he’s signed to, but I think the commitments he makes during this time will last him a few years. I think ‘feeling understood’ will be a big theme during this time, forming friendships with people who make him feel closer to the kind of person he wants to be. I think these commitments will be made out of emotion, but it’s because he’s choosing to believe how [others] feel about him.

[smallgodseries]

*We offer this small god for all of you currently baking in the heat of the ever-worsening climate crisis.

Some people say that she shouldn’t be a god at all.

Some people say that she’s a demigod at best, and much more probably a muse of some sort, divine, yes, but not worthy of the admirations of godhood.

Aestha knows better.  She inspires nothing.  Her gifts are more prosaic ones.  Her faithful are by nature polytheistic: they go to other gods for inspiration, dally with demigods, marry muses.  They find their creations in other hands, and then they come to her with heads full of images and hands full of needing, and no idea how to put the two together.

She is a historian, of sorts, for in her name, sculptors call forth deities, pin them down in substance so that they may be seen and understood and yes, remembered.  Her hand guides the brush of our faithful illuminator, allowing him to set the images of her fellows—and even herself—down in line and color.  She stands with sculptors, shapes the clay of potters, even guides the needles in the hands of felt artists.  As long as the end result is an image of one of her kin and kind, her hand is there, and her need for worship is appeased.

Among all the gods of the arts, she is one of the least known, and the least appreciated.  The artist provides the talent and skill: neither of them come from her.  The gods themselves provide the inspiration: that is not her doing.  What she brings is the motivation to combine the two in the correct order, the ability to stand the completed work before the world and say “look, see?  This is my creation, behold.”

We are reasonably sure that our illuminator is her most loyal follower remaining in the modern world, outside of the eight dozen people doing illustrated retellings of Hades of Persephone.  But those are large gods, and large gods have less need of loyalty than the smaller kind.

The gods love her.  Her faithful loves her.  And for her, focused as she is upon the next statue for her garden, that has always been enough.

Medusa does not love her.

But that is a story for another scripture.

[kaiannae]

It is time- (Or: It Has Begin XD)

Greetings, my dear readers, it has been quite some time. First and foremost I would like to assure you that yes, I'm alive, and no, I have not abandoned my writing. But, I HAVE been distracted by somehing in the last few months, and I think its time to reveal it. I made a game! And not just a game, a Shadowgast game. I would like to present to you:

Beacon Run.

Ko-Fi This game begun its existance as a homework project for a game dev course I took about a year ago. I was supposed to implement a simple chase and pickup game and I thought, "Why use some random sprites when all I can imagine is small chibi Caleb chasing small chibi Essek around while Essek is trying to nom beacons?"

This idea lit a fire in my brain, and I just had to implement it but I had a very short time for the assignment. Iended up implementing something very simple, but I just couldn't let it go afterwards and vowed I was going to finish that small game and get it out for the fandom to play.

It has since been rewriteen, refactored and recoded several times, until I had something workable to show others. This is the place to mention the major contribution the people fo AIFL had on this little game. As I was maing this game, I shared its early stages with the server, and people have been kind in thier enthusasm, gave me ideas and provided invaluable criticism and feedback. They kept me motivated and kept me going through the lows of frustration one gets when coding. I got @bumble-b-goode 's permission to use their designs for the Weezards and drew my own sprites using that as inspiration. I ended up creating most of the assets for this game. Drawing the art assets took quite some time and I've learned a lot in the process.

Beacon Run not big or complicated as a game. In essence, is a tribute and a love letter to the Critical Role community and the CR crew. To the people who brought to life the Mighty Nein and have shared, and continue to share their stories with us on a weekly basis throughout the years. For Liam and Matt, who have weaved the tale of two broken wizards mending each other into better people, and keep their children of ink and paper alive for us to enjoy. The game: You as a player, are randomly assigned a little wizard to play for each match, so you can play as Essek or Caleb. The board dimensions and obstacles and even the flooring art are randomized for each match so each match is different. Your goal: to collect as many Beacons as you can during the allotted time, and end up with more Beacons than your rival which is the other wizard played by the computer. You gain projectiles over time, which are fake Beacons you can throw at the other wizard. If hit, the rival wizard is stunned for a short time, and drops several of his picked up Beacons for you to gather. However, beware! The rival wizard can also shoot you and stun you for a short while, and make you drop beacons as well. (You might notice that Essek gets stunned by sour lemon Beacons, while Caleb gets stunned by hand-knitted wool Beacons XD) In addition, when the rival is hit, he may drop a Magic Abeyance Bead which contains a Chronurgy spell. if you pick it up, it will provide a short time bonus for the match. In short, the game is a small, cozy game, made out of love for the wizards and the fandom, and I hope you'll enjoy it! I it still in the late stages of testing and development, as the feedback players provide is invaluable and lets me find bugs, add ideas and content suggested and tweak the mechanics to make it more enjoyable. So I would very much appreciate feedback, suggestions, con-crit etc. I would be happy to head what you like about it, what you think needs tweaking, ideas of content to add.... you name it! (Note that currently, the game does not work on mobile. I am planing to revamp the input system and add touch suport for mobile in the near future) Also it is worth mentioning that as I fix bugs, add content and tweak things, I upload new versions of the game so its worth following the Devlog and updates. The game is avaliable for play in the embedded player on the page, and also available for download to play offline (Though you might need to redownload it with every new version as I don't have an auto updater for it.)

In addition, if you like my work, feel like enabling me to make more of these or just want to buy me a coffee, It is always very much appreciated as it sure helps me stay afloat! Tip Jar

So, I hope you forgive me for my lack of writing for the last few months. I really wanted to get this out. I am trying to keep writing in my spare time, but the muses haven't been with me lately. I hope that now that this is out I can finally get my mind off it XD Stay tuned!

[celestialtarot11]

Career Guidance + Messages 💼🥂🌃

Hi friends! Welcome to another PAC post 💌💖 thank you all for supporting me! We’re going to be getting you some career advice + messages regarding that! Happy picking ✨🌹

Pile 1: 9 of pentacles • The Tower • King Of Swords

Hi there pile 1’s! 💗🤗 Welcome to your reading. For some of ya’ll, maybe you received a short notice you were fired? Or for someone tried to either gossip about you, or fire you. Or cause some sort of situation at work where your reputation could’ve been damaged. Im sorry if that did happen pile 1’s, I do see you’re caring for yourself and currently living in your own world 💅🏻 as you should! If you got fired spirit is saying you didn’t deserve that, and you may actually have a chance to get a better job, a job you actually love and feel comfortable with. Im getting this massive download that some of ya’ll were waiting for someone or a group of people to receive their karma? They may have done you dirty in the past and now you’ve seen them receive it. I feel like spirit is saying continue caring for yourself, and if you’ve been losing sleep over finding another job, attract that opportunity 💗 spirit will make it known to you. You will rebuild after a loss or stagnation in your career and your reputation will improve. There is some sort of truth that this person or group hid that’ll bite them in the ass is what I heard 👀 pile 1’s, I hope this resonated for you. And I hope you can move on and do whats best for you to move forward in peace and love 🤍

Pile 2: King of Pentacles • Ace of wands • 5 of wands

Hi there pile 2’s! Welcome to your reading 💗🤗 I see you are financially stable or are reaching a point of stability and I heard this was a long time coming! You’ve been working your butt off is also what I heard, and you’ve faced many days and nights with conflict, issues and petty drama. Spirit is saying things will solidify and take a more consistent approach in your career, and your passion for life and making money will return. Some of ya’ll may actually enjoy the rush, you feel motivated and inspired to take action and maybe your next job/career will require you to be physically active. Or maybe it already does. But spirit is saying you may receive a bonus or promotion soon for your hard work! You will be recognized! 💗 I also see a lot of other people trying to one up you, so maybe this was an issue you faced in your career. People may have tried to compete against you and show off, but at the end you’ll be receiving a beautiful reward with recognition 🤍 and your own money is a sign of how much you’ve worked too so be proud! Spirit is very proud of you 🤗 make sure to rest and not burn yourself out as well, if you’ve been working a lot pile 2’s. Thank you for reading & please feel free to comment like or reblog! Have a great one 💗

Pile 3: 4 of pentacles • Page of cups • 3 of cups

Hi there pile 3’s! 🤗 welcome! I see for a while ya’ll have been saving up and now have an opportunity to spend on a night out 👀 you may get to know your coworkers a lot more and make friends! I see its a time for celebration too, so maybe you hit your goal amount either now, or in the future and you’ll want to celebrate with the people around you 💗 wonderful job pile 3’s! There may be a party at work or around you. For guidance, I feel that its important to get out there and get to know who is around you and what, especially if you’ve been focused on work for a while. Emotionally it’ll help you feel less pressured and more comfortable. I think you are the pile to stay alone and reserved, and thats understandable! So it may take some time for you to open up but I see plenty opportunities to get to know coworkers 🤗 you may also have a new coworker joining in! Someone you’ll get along greatly with and have fun with at work. I also feel some of yall have been saving up to be able to buy your sibling or friend a beautiful gift and now you can surprise them! I love this and I think they’ll love the gift, especially since its from you 🤍 for some of yall specifically that’ll resonate. Overall, work will improve and become fun if things have been stagnant or slow! Enjoy pile 3’s and please feel free to comment, reblog and like 💗

Pile 4: The Lovers • Ace of pentacles • 6 of cups

Hi there pile 4’s! 🤗 honestly this is such a sweet but hot and heavy energy 👀 I heard you’ll possibly be partnering up with someone of your dreams… romantically speaking. They may come in the form of a coworker, partner of some kind. But they will have lots of resources, money and resources to help you with any project, or anything! This could be a romantic opportunity as well, and a chance to bond with someone at work. They’ll help you financially and in some other ways…👀 is what I heard. I also heard you’re getting all in one 😂 whoever this person is, they’re cheeky and mischievous, but hella charming. And very smart. You’ll be getting a bonus or promotion soon! And will approach financial stability in the future. I see lots of cute moments and overall you’ll be enjoying your time at work. You’ll be feeling lighter, joyful, happy and expressive with the people around you. You’ll be feeling connected to what it is you do! This person could also show you another job opportunity too, so maybe some of yall are unhappy with your current job and this person comes in and gives you another reason to like them 😂 (another job) omg they’re so smooth and quick with it! Major flirt. Enjoy pile 4’s 👀 feel free to comment, like and reblog 💅🏻🤍

Thank ya’ll for reading! Feel free to like comment and reblog 🌟💗 thank ya’ll for the support! This was so much fun to do.

Paid Readings 🌟🤍