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tarotbydelilah444 · 2 months ago

Text

pac: your future spouse

pile one

personality

judgement + six of swords + four of swords

Your future spouse is someone that is very popular. They could be well-known in their community, or they have a lot of close friends.

Your future spouse is very family-orientated. They could be extremely close to their family, and they may often think heavily about having a family one day. They desire to one day have a big family of their own.

Your future spouse may struggle to slow down in their daily lives. They are always on the go, never knowing when to stop and take a break. They are very determined and resilient.

Your future spouse displays the characteristics of a extrovert and introvert (ambivert). They like to socialize and can possibly enjoy being around others. They are very outgoing and enjoying meeting new people. They are also someone who doesn’t mind having alone time and taking the back sit to listen and observe others.

Your future spouse is relatively laid back. They have a very calm, yet peaceful demeanor. They are likely someone who needs peace and quiet, or simply time alone to reflect from time to time, so try not to take it personally, and allow them to come to you when they are ready. You could probably perceive your spouse at detached and cold at times, but it’s mostly because they value time alone to reflect. They are not one to argue, they rather take space, and think over the situation from a logical standpoint and come back to revisit the situation from a calmer and rational standpoint with solutions on how resolve issues and conflict.

Your future spouse is very well-rounded. They are very interested in learning from different places and situations. They love to travel, or have traveled to many places in their lifetime before meeting you.

They are very resilient and accept challenges with grace. They are not one to dwell on their issues, but whether likes to problem solve and learn from their experiences. This person appreciates self-reflection or the idea of constantly improving themselves. They rarely like to stay the same, and always open to whatever changes life brings their way.

Your person is definitely a natural born leader. Your person understands their personal power and are able to inspire those to follow them. Your person has a silent, yet commanding presence and confidence that can be seen as intimidating, yet intriguing. They definitely embody “alpha” male or dominant energy.

Your future spouse is very intelligent, sociable, and a great communicator. They value and appreciate communication. They enjoy being stimulated intellectually and enjoy picking people’s brains. They can be rather detached and aloof at times. They are a very rational person, they rely on logical reasoning rather than depending on emotions when it comes to dealing with any situation thrown their way. They could even sometimes be an over-thinker and often deal with their emotions by internalizing them. They may even struggle with anxiety, stress, depression, or may struggle with their mental health.

their astrological sign

This can apply to their sun, moon, rising, venus, or mars in their chart. This can also apply for synastry as well.

Cancer

Leo

Sagittarius

Capricorn

Gemini

Libra

Aquarius

Scorpio, Plutonian influence / aspects, 8th house placements

Air Dominant

Pisces, Neptunian influence / aspects / 12th house placements

physical appearance

three of wands • knight of swords • page of cups

Your future spouse is very attractive, or seen as conventionally attractive. They could have softer to slightly angular features.

Your future spouse’s hair stands out, so they could have a unique texture, style, or length, or hair color. For some, they could have locs or a faded haircut.

Their eye color could range from hazel, brown, dark brown, to grey with long beautiful lashes.

Tall in stature, or can appear taller (longer legs with a long torso).

Your future spouse is of mixed heritage or has an ambiguous appearance.

Your future spouse has a muscular or toned figure. They take great pride in their physical appearance. Your future spouse likes to workout, stay active, and is even health conscious, or mindful of what they consume.

Your person has a casual or laid back aesthetic / style, but they always look stylish and appear as they take care of their appearance. They may like neutral to darker tone colors, like blue, white, and black. They may enjoy wearing more athleisure clothes, informal, yet comfortable clothes, like t-shirts, jeans, sneakers, or smart casual style. They are very creative when it comes to styling themselves, or their style could be seen as creative, or they know how to make their style more unique and right for them at the same time. I am also picking up a bookish aesthetic , so this person has an academia/preppy style. They could wear glasses to make themselves appear more intelligent, even though they are without them.

Your future spouse is relatively younger in age, or they have a very youthful appearance, even if they are the same age as you or older when you meet.

They could have a very mysterious, detached, and aloof appearance when you first meet them. They could have a RBF, or can seem a bit standoffish or nonchalant upon your initial meeting, but deep down this person is very much a sweetheart and loving as you get to know them.

their love languages

five of pentacles • strength • knight of cups

Your future spouse seems to embody most of the five love languages when it comes to expressing their love for / to you, and how they want you to express their love to them, but these are a few of their main love languages.

gift giving

Your future spouse will want to show their love for you by buying you gifts. They will buy you things that you have had your eye on for quite some time, or even buy you things that remind them of you. Expect flowers, buying your favorite snacks / foods, following you around Target, Ulta, Sephora, carrying your items in the cart for countless hours, and end up paying for everything in your basket. Everyday will feel like Valentine’s Day with them.

words of affirmation

Your future spouse will try their best to compliment you, or even saying encouraging words to you in good and bad times, specifically when you are feeling down. They will know just the right words to say to help you feel motivated and like yourself again. They will tell you how proud they are of you, how grateful they are for you, how special you are to them, giving you the strength to keep going. This person will send you “good morning texts, or even so as much to write you a letter/poem, expressing their love for you. Telling you how beautiful you look and constantly gassing you up. Pouring love and life into you endlessly.

quality time

Your future spouse will want to spend quality time together. They will almost always want to have you to themselves. They will schedule date nights or even random romantic getaways, so the two of you can focus on each other and making the love that you share stronger. They will always be down to try new things with you and be invested in anything you do. They definitely crave intimacy with you, so expect a lot of deep conversations, looking deeply into each other’s eyes, laughter, and smiles as you connect on an intimate level.

their profession

king of pentacles & the lovers

Your future spouse is very passionate about their job. Your future spouse loves their job or the particular career path they are in. They feel like the career that they are currently at when you meet them is/was apart their purpose or is something they were always meant to do.

For some, your future spouse could have a career in the following:

Actor / Actress

Singer / Musician

Advertiser

Dancer

Influencer / YouTuber

Athlete / Sports Agent

Works with children

Teacher / Professor

Professions that requires a PhD, master’s degree, or certification

Lawyer

Judge

Truck driver / Chauffeur / Mechanic /

Salesperson / Telemarketer

Traveling advisor / Agent

Counselor

Accountant (CPA) / financing / Stockbroker

Writer

Your future spouse could be an entrepreneur, so they could own their own business, but I do see that they could work with another person, like a business partner. This could be a friend of theirs, coworker, family (brother, sister, mother, father, etc) . They could also go into business with you, if it resonates. If your future spouse doesn’t own their own business, then they work at a firm or corporate job, where they could be a manager, supervisor, CEO, or even a COO. Your future spouse is very hardworking. They do not take any shortcuts when it comes to his/her line of work. They are ambitious and disciplined, which has helped them reach their career goals and achieve longevity in their career. They are very confident, dependable, charismatic, successful, patient, and business savvy. They seem to make great amount of money and is able to live a comfortable and possibly luxurious lifestyle before and after meeting you. Your future spouse may be required to travel for work.

how will they treat you

Your future spouse is a complete gentleman, very chivalrous. They are the type to open the door for you, walk on the opposite side of the street, offer to pay the bill, carry your things, and treat you with respect like the lady you are. They have a very masculine presence to them, so this person will definitely wear the pants in the relationship, but not in an ultra toxic masculinity way. They believe in being an old-fashioned gentlemen, someone who provides for and protects his lady and his family. A leader who knows what he wants and someone that you can follow with certainty and confidence and also be someone that you can look up to.

two of cups + ace of swords

Your person will be absolutely in love with you. You are not only the love of their life, but you are their best friend. They trust, love, respect, and adore you all at once. Your person will always ensure that you always feel loved and that you never have to question their intentions, they will always be honest and upfront with you, so there is no room for any doubts or concerns. They also have a high emotional intelligence, so they will try their best to resolve any misunderstandings, try their best to understand your feelings, properly manage their emotions in every situation, and listen to your concerns. They will always strive to keep this connection together, no matter what the both of you go through, they would rather go through it with you together than alone.

the hierophant + six of cups

Your future spouse has a conventional sense of love and relationships. Your future spouse values stability and will try their best to ensure that you and them go the long haul. They are a provider, so they feel as that it is their duty to provide for you and give you everything you could ever need and want, and they take great pride in being able to support and provide for you in anyway they can. They envision building a long and happy future with you. They want spend every moment of their lives with you, creating long-lasting memories that the two of you can reminisce when you are old and grey. The movie, The Notebook comes to mind as I channel. You are this person home, their safehaven, and their safety net. If you two plan to have children in the future, they are eager to have a huge family with you. They feel like you two would make excellent and loving parents. They see as someone that they can grow with and learn from. For some, your future spouse could be very religious as well, so this is how they was brought up that will determine how they will treat you.

queen of swords + the emperor

Your future spouse will be fiercely protective of you. They will be as your own personal security wherever you go. Your safety and level of comfortability matters to your person and is their upmost priority. They will never allow anyone to disrespect you by any means. They are loyal to you to a fault and will always be there for you when you need them and fighting by your side against the obstacles that come your way. They also will value your opinion and guidance, and be there for you when you are in need of guidance and support. Your future spouse also values your opinions and will likely come to you when they need guidance or advice.

their sexual style

I am not going to lie, your future spouse gives me heavy Christian Grey or even Massimo Torricelli vibes. They are pretty intense and embodies the “classic dom” vibe with ease. You will find them to be intimidating, yet intriguing. Your future spouse’s sexual style is very controlled, dark, and kinky in nature. They prefer to be in control when it comes to sex, no matter what. “I’m the boss” is what I intuitively heard. They want to be one in command, never the other way around. The only time they will ever fall to their knees is when it comes to pleasuring you. They are determined to have whatever they want and it must be to their liking and standards at all times. I do sense they will likely choose what they want you to wear and simply want you to always look your best for them, and only them. Your future spouse is very composed and chivalrous. They will always treat you with the upmost respect in public, but behind those bedroom doors, lies a different story. “Welcome to my Pride Lands” is what I intuitively heard. Once you enter into their world, there is no turning back, and you will automatically belong to them and obey their every command. I also get the feeling that your future spouse likes your innocence, this can be your lack of experience or you have this essence of “innocence” to you that they find not only appealing, but something they need to protect for some reason. It’s kinda difficult for me to understand, as I channeled the message, but that is what I picked from their energy. They like how modest you are, you stand out amongst any other person they have ever been with in the past . “It’s different with you”. It’s something about you that makes this person want to be a better version of themselves for you. I intuitively thought of Beauty and the Beast, and how Belle was able to change the Beast’s heart because she saw beyond his ferocious and cold nature, and able to bring out a much gentler and compassionate side out of him. You have somehow managed to tame their inner beast.

keywords

wining & dining • Under The Influence by Chris Brown • bondage / bdsm • lipstick stains • everything about you is scrumptious, I love how you taste on my lips and tongue • I want you in the worst way • High For This by The Weeknd • “i find you to be intoxicating” • surrender yourself to me • pain & pleasure • safe words • trust me, I would never hurt you • office sex • hung • reciprocal and mutual effort • handcuffs • Playing Dangerous by Lana Del Rey • fantasy girl • Stargirl Interlude by The Weeknd ft Lana Del Rey • make a good girl turn bad • mascara running & smeared lipstick • lingerie / slip dress • silky sheets • Dance For You by Beyoncé • escapism • all is fair in love and war • anal play • “I want to feel your guts” • “who’s in control” • fighting their urges • Private Show by T.I. ft Chris Brown • love and honor you as a wife, but fuck you like a mistress • the art of seduction • releasing inhibitions • lady in the streets, freak in the sheets • conquest • S&M by Rihanna • “who’s your daddy” • sexual tension • Wild Side by Normani • harmonizing / in sync with one another • drunk sex • student and professor • First Fuck by 6lack ft Jhené Aiko • begging and longing for me • hot candle wax • boss & secretary • dolled up for me • recreating porn scenes • Dreams, Fairytales, and Fantasies by ASAP Ferg ft Brent Faiyaz • NDA • temperatures rising • intense stares • bending over the desk • foot fetish • Fifty Shades Darker (movie) • foot jobs • asphyxiation kink • rich sex • fucked senselessly • “all good comes to those that wait” • our little secret • high standards • power struggles • survival of the fittest • Ain’t Love ft Blackbear • Scandal (tv show) • don’t kiss and tell • In the Closet by Michael Jackson • Romantic Lover by Eyedress • grabbing by the waist • until the last man stands • playboy • Bambi eyes • “your body is a work of art” • Wolf on Wall Street (nursery scene) • sex by the fireplace • kiss on the hand • deep penetration • voice like an angel • show no mercy • Daphne & Simon (Bridgerton) • pinning your arms down above your head • looking up at you as they eat you out • “don’t cum, until I tell you to” • jazz music as we slow dance in the dark • “is this okay” • Partition by Beyoncé • burying your head in the pillow • Get On Your Knees Ariana Grande ft Nicki Minaj • lap dance • Whatever You Want by Tony Toni Toné • subtle whispers • ripped shirts and stockings • grind on me • waking up soar • keep up with me • “I fuck hard” • legs over the shoulders • dragging their thumb across your pretty little lips • fuck you in the mirror • elevator scene (Fifty Shades Darker) • biting lips • punish me • “you see right through me” • Purple Kisses by The Dream • Hades & Persephone

pile two

personality

four of wands • the devil • wheel of fortune (rx) • ace of cups

Your future spouse is very free spirited. This person doesn’t like to follow the rules, they rather go with flow and march to the beat of their own drum. They love a good time and are very spontaneous, always down to do something fun and exciting.

Your future spouse is a happy-go-lucky. They are someone that is always happy or always seems to have a smile on their face. You will rarely see them sad, and if they are sad, they will never show it, or find a way to make themselves happy again.

Your future spouse has the gift of gab, they are very sociable and can socialize for hours. They can be a bit of an instigator and often can be a bit of a gossip at times, which can sometimes get them into trouble.

Your future spouse is the life of the party. They love to have fun and will always bring happiness and excitement wherever they go. Your own personal hype man/woman.

Your future spouse is very independent and enjoys their freedom. They could be their own boss, because they don’t like to be told what to do by anyone and tied down to one specific thing.

Your future spouse can be a bit excessive at times. They can overindulge in many things that can lead them to making reckless decisions and losing control of themselves. They are the “go big or go home” type of person.

Your future spouse may have control issues, they feel need to have control over people, things, and situations in their life. They don’t like change and highly stubborn against their own benefit. This person could struggle to change their ways because they simply aren’t ready to change or hate the idea of starting over.

Your future spouse could struggle with some inner demons when you meet them. They have a lot of unresolved issues from their past that they have not released and healed which makes them act in negative ways. This person will possibly have to do some maturing and growing before they married you, or they will be working through these issues before or after meeting you.

Your future spouse beyond their inner darkness, they are truly a sweet and caring person. They have the biggest heart that often gets taken for granted. They are very empathetic and kind to others. They are also a very creative and intuitive being. They can also be a bit emotional and sensitive at times.

Your future spouse is athletic or loves to stay active.

their astrological sign

This can apply to their sun, moon, rising, venus, or mars in their chart. This can also apply to synastry as well.

Capricorn

Sagittarius / Jupiterian influence + dominant, 9th house placements

Aries

Leo

Cancer

Pisces

Taurus

Virgo

Scorpio

Libra

Gemini

physical appearance

three of swords (rx) • king of cups • ace of cups

Your future spouse is very attractive. They get attention from many people, and many people may find them very attractive, this could be appearance wise, or something about their personality that makes people gravitate to them. They also attract a lot of jealously from others that may envy their physical appearance.

This person may be African American. They have a medium to darker complexion.

Your future spouse has an amazing body. They have slim, yet trim physique. They could have a six pack with toned legs and arms. They enjoy playing sports and they are very active. They can be average or tall in height.

Your future person could have the appearance of a heartbreaker, even if they are not a heartbreaker. They are perceived as they could break a lot of people’s hearts, or the stereotypical “bad boy” look. Your person has a “heartthrob” look to him like that are common in those romcoms movies and tv shows. I channeled Aaron Pierre. Your future spouse could have green or hazel eyes. If not that, there is something about their eyes that is captivating (shape, or their gaze). They could have a nice & short neat cut to longer hair. They could have light or darker hair, this could be their natural hair color, or they may have dyed it. They may also have facial hair, this could range from peach fuzz, a mustache, or a goatee.

Your future spouse could be a bit older than you. They have a mature or wise-looking appearance, even if they are young in age. They appear as if they have a lot of wisdom or knowledge to share. People can easily trust your future spouse. They have an approachable or friendly vibe. They have a warm and inviting smile. A sparkle or glimmer in their eyes, and a calm and laidback presence.

Your future spouse’s aesthetic could be very masculine. Your future spouse could like a style that allows them to feel free and active, so they could like sporty clothing, or even clothing that makes them look intimidating or even make them feel empowered. I’m channeling ripped jeans, basic tees, leather/biker jacket, varsity jackets, jerseys). They may like clothing that allows them to show off the defined parts of their body. They may like more reddish and darker-toned clothing. They still have a laid-back, yet rugged aesthetic going on.

They could wear glasses, this could be prescribed or just for aesthetic purposes.

their love languages words of affirmation

Your future spouse is big on communication, so words of affirmations is one of their most displayed love language. A “snake charmer” is what I heard. They will likely send you “good morning” text, words of encouragement, a voice note, or even check on you throughout the day. They may even call you before they go to work, while they are on break, or even call you on their way home. You live rent free in your future spouse’s mind. They often daydream or think about you throughout their day, just waiting for the day to end to see you and be in your lovely presence once more. They will ask you about your day and want to tell you about theirs, especially if they had a bad day or if you had a bad day. “I just needed to hear your voice”. Your person loves to hear your voice, as it puts them at ease every time they hear it. They are so supportive and attentive that they will stay up all night to allow you to vent and release some of that unnecessary stress, if they have to

acts of service

Your future spouse may like to cook, so they will cook breakfast, lunch, and dinner for the two of you. I’m channeling “breakfast in bed”, so your future spouse will cook you breakfast while you rest in the bed. Cooking is a way they like to express their love and care for you as they believe that “food is a way to a person’s heart and stomach”. I channeled your future spouse surprising you with your favorite food, or even cooking so you don’t have to after a busy and stressful day/week. They may even want to cook together, so don’t worry they will teach you the basics and help throughout the way, so you don’t hurt or make a fool of yourself. They will also cook for you when you are feeling sick to nourish you back to health and after sex to allow you to regain your energy and strength.

quality time

Your future spouse is quite possessive when it comes to you. They want you all to themselves. It’s funny because I’m channeling an image of your future spouse looking like a child being dropped off on their first day of school, begging and crying for their parents to not leave them. They aren’t literally crying, but I see that they long to be with you all the time. I’m also channeling an image of them watching you in amazement as you sleep before they go to work. They feel quite sad when they aren’t in your presence (they may have separation anxiety), so they hate being away from you too long or they start to feel like they are going crazy without you. Your future spouse’s heart and soul bleeds and longs for you more than you will ever know. They like to memorize the way you looked, how you smelled, and how you felt before they depart, as a way of keeping that memory of you alive in their head throughout their day, as a reminder that the two of you will be reunited very soon.

physical touch

Your future spouse also loves and appreciate physical touch. They remind me of a “golden retriever”, they are going to be all over you because they miss and love you so fucking much, it’s so cute to imagine. They are so affectionate and frisky. They won’t be able to keep their hands off you, if you know what I mean. They are the type to randomly smack and grab your butt, hug you from behind and kiss you on your neck, and give you massages, hugging you tightly like they are afraid to let you go. I intuitively heard, “Like I’m Gonna Lose You” by Meghan Trainor. Just being in your presence brightens their day and makes them so happy, and excited (literally & sexually speaking). I’m channeling an image of the two of you cuddling on the couch or bed, watching a movie, and suddenly losing interest in the movie, as the two of you begin to caress and have a passionate makeout session, that will lead to some well-deserved and enjoyable sex. Hope you are not afraid of a little PDA because your future spouse won’t hesitate showing their love and affection in public, I’m hearing “anytime and anyplace”.

their profession

eight of swords • two of cups

Your future spouse has a career that focuses on helping people work through their insecurities, fears, heal their wounds /traumas. Your future spouse’s career has in a sense help them face and heal their own insecurities, fears, and inner wounds. Your person is very compassionate, empathetic and very likable in their career. They can get along with anyone and always willing to help others in need, they may have people pleasing tendencies, or have a hard time saying no to others. Your future spouse is very in tuned with their masculine and feminine energies. They have great and adequate emotional intelligence. They have a natural ability to understand and understand what people need on an emotional level. They are credited for transforming many people’s lives in some way.

For some, your future spouse could have a career in the following:

Licensed therapists

Psychiatrists / Psychologists

Cosmologist / Cosmetics surgeon

Sex therapist

Spiritual counselor

Speech pathologist

Motivational speaker

Massage therapist / chiropractor

Barber

Personal Trainer

Social worker

Dentist

Guidance counselor / School Counselor

Teacher / Professor

how will they treat you

Your future spouse is humorous or a jokester. They will always find a way to put a huge smile on your face, even when the both of you have a falling out whether that’s telling you a corny joke or doing something completely silly that will make hard for you to stay mad at them for too long. Your future spouse is so nurturing and caring. They vowed to always be there for you in any way they can. I’m seeing, if you get sick or during your menstrual, they will literally go into doctor mode by making you soup, tea, buying your favorite snacks, cooking meals, doing housework, preparing a bath for you, and even giving you massages to make you feel better. They will literally risk their own health to make sure that you are taken care of first. I’m hearing, “You are my number 1 priority.” 🥹 Your person will never abandon you when you need them the most. Your person would literally give up their lung, kidney, and heart, if they had to. I’m channeling the movie, “Five Feet Apart”. They would give up their life for you in a heartbeat. Travel & adventure is another big deal for your person. They love to explore different places, and cultures. They may desire to experience traveling with you to different countries, cities, states, and continents. For some, you or your future spouse could come from different backgrounds (race/ethnicity, religion, nationality, etc) and the both of you will be interested in learning more about each others cultures, creating a bonding and learning experience for the both of you. Your future spouse is a problem solver, so they will like to resolve any issues and conflict that may come up in the relationship. They much rather talk over things than to go to bed angry. I heard, “I can’t sleep without my best friend”. This person dislikes negativity or when there’s conflict. They will want to immediately work it out and move forward with you, instead of holding onto resentment and anger. It’s giving, “I’m a lover, not a fighter”. Like I legit see you and your future spouse in bed, and you scoot away from them, out of pettiness, they will just pull you closer to them. I just heard “Even if you are mad at me, you still going put your leg around my leg”. They can’t sleep in peace when their “baby” is mad at them.

six of cups + eight of pentacles

Your future spouse will always put in effort to make this connection last for forever. I’m channeling Natalie Cole, “This Will Be ( An Everlasting Love). Your future spouse understands that love requires teamwork, sacrifice, effort, and dedication, and they will try their absolute best everyday to be consistent, no matter what. Your future spouse will feel like you are their “soulmate” and you are the missing piece that they have been searching and trying to reconnect with for their entire lives. You are this person’s rib. They are in love love with you and they want to spend the rest of their lives with you, creating beautiful memories with you by their side. You will bring so much joy and happiness into your person’s life and they absolutely grateful for your presence in their lives. You heal their inner child and you make them feel loved, safe, and valued, and they always want to return that love and safety in return. They are the type to bring flowers home and pull you in for a long kiss and embrace after work, asking you how your day went, and refusing to be away from you for not a moment longer. The two will be each others’ best friend.

ace of wands + the empress

Your person loves to see you naked. They love everything about your body and find everything about you to be absolutely beautiful and breathtaking . If the two of you don’t have kids at the moment, they will want to get you pregnant ASAP! Your person will not be able to keep their hands to themselves and will want you all for themselves. The relationship that you share with your future spouse reminds me of ASAP Rocky and Rihanna. The sexual tension and chemistry is evident and it’s almost as if no one in the room matters or even exists, but the two of you, like all the two you have to do is lock eyes and it’s immediately time for the two of you to head home to make some passionate love-making. Beside, having the hots for you, I see that you inspire this person to always be a better version of themselves, you bring so much excitement and enthusiasm into their life that they have never felt before. They also intend to inspire you to go after whatever you want in life and to challenge you to become a better version of yourself, as you do for them. Your future spouse treasures you like precious jewels. You are literally the apple of this person’s eye and they want to always shower you with their love and affection that you are deserving of. If they could give you the whole world, they would. “If This World Were Mine” by Luther Vandross ft Cheryl Lynn came to mind.

eight of cups (rx) + chariot

Your person will never give up on you and the love that you share, no matter what obstacles stand in the way. They are willing to always fight by your side through thick and thin because you mean so much to them. You inspire this person to drop their guard to be vulnerable, in ways that no one has ever managed to do. You make them want to take risks that they have never considered before or may have been hesitant about in the past. You inspire this person to confront difficult situations and challenges instead of running away from issues. You make them stronger in ways that they didn’t think they were capable of being resilient. You give them strength to overcome their fears and weaknesses.

their sexual style

Your future spouse’s sexual style is a mixture of many different things. They are pretty adaptable to whatever you are in to. “I’m just here to please you, baby” is what I heard. They are quite vocal about what their sexual needs are and what they expect in the bed room, and they expect you to be the same with them, telling them exactly how they can satisfy your every desire. They know exactly how to switch it up and make the experience magical and memorable. They can be nice and slow, one minute and then rough and fast, the next minute, when it’s necessary. Sex with them will be a total mind-fuck and a regenerative experience. I’m hearing, “this d*ck / p*ssy will change your life”. They are so ballsy, but they are determined to be the only one that can satisfy and handle you like no other person has ever been able to do. They want to make you forget all about those other guys or girls, they don’t exist nor do they matter. I literally see a scenario of them digging deep into you and asking you “who this p*ssy belong to you” and going deeper and deeper until admit and submit to them fully. Best I Ever Had by Drake came to mind. Your future spouse is truly full of surprises, so don’t expect the same things twice. I sense they like the idea of “catching you off guard” and getting right down to business. “Anywhere and Anytime” is what I intuitively heard. They are always wanting to try something new and exciting. They love anything that will give them a rush or an exhilarating feeling. Sex on the balcony. Sex on the beach. Sex on the kitchen counter. Sex in the parking lot. Sex pretty much anywhere, in every single position. There is no limit in the name of pleasure, when it comes to them. Take it if resonates, but your future spouse might have a sex addiction, or maybe they just enjoy and love “sex” in general. I intuitively heard, Freak Like Me by Adina Howard. They need it on a daily basis, if possible. I also channeled that if you and them get into an argument or disagreement, they just going “f*ck the attitude right out of you”. lol, I literally heard, “I love angry sex, that shit turns me on even more”. Not the most healthiest way to solve conflict, but sometimes, they think you just need “to get some” to straighten you out and all will be well in the world. Happy wife, happy life! Your future spouse is so funny, like they don’t to take nothing too seriously. Your future spouse is not really the type to talk about their honest feelings. I think it makes them uncomfortable to express their deep emotions. “I can show you more than I can tell you”. They like for the sex to be fun and playful, lots of roughhousing, flirting, laughter, dirty talking, and eye contact to fill the space. After the two of you climax and come undone, I do see that they definitely want to cuddle, while running their fingers through your hair and leaving trails of kisses from your lips to your spine. Talking about each experience afterwards, to get your input on what you liked and disliked and how the two of you can improve for the next time. Although they love to keep it fun and exciting in between the sheets, your person deeply values your opinion and cares about your boundaries in regards to sex, so don’t be shy to communicate your needs and concerns with them ever.

keywords

talking you through it • Earned It by The Weeknd • insatiable appetite • getting it in everyday • I Put A Spell On You by Nina Simone • spanking scene (Fifty Shades of Grey) • giver • “making you feel good, makes me feel good” • healing sex • Erykah Badu effect • boosting my ego • neck grabs and passionate makeout session • Whatever She Want by Bryson Tiller • blindfolding • nobody got sh*t on you • Best in the World Russ ft Bia • tease me • dirty talk • “i love hearing you moan and scream my name” • Big Poppa by Biggie • fingering • “I aim to please” • figuring out what turns you on • Favorite by Nicki Minaj ft Jeremiah • “so what if we get caught” • playing mind games • predator & prey • pillow talk • “I’ll fix that smart mouth of yours” • arguing to fucking • voyeurism • Her Way by PND • multiple orgasms • astral projecting • quickies • Good Love by Anita Baker • around the world • foreplay • Kiss It Better by Rihanna • cuddling after sex • “so tight for me” • No Chill by PND • “that’s it baby, just like that” • “my little slut” swapping roles • Tempo by Chris Brown • ice play • tactile sensations • “just for me” • Final Fantasy by Drake • christening the whole house • mutual masturbation • Mine by Beyoncé ft Drake • sex in random places • Jason’s Lyric (movie) • ass smacking / grabbing • pet names • role-playing • overstimulation • “I know you can take it all” • head game goes crazy • Wildest Dreams by Taylor Swift • Orion’s Belt by Sabrina Claudio • energizer bunny • “I like a little challenge” • Ego by Beyoncé • “you fucking with the best” • sit back and enjoy the show • let me take you to ecstasy • Kundalini awakening • edging • Make Me Proud by Drake ft Nicki Minaj • body worship / praise • The Afternoon by Blackbear • sucking on fingers • studying your facial reactions in awe • French kissing • fingers in my back • gripping the sheets • grips on the thighs, hips, and ass • back scratches • smack prints on the ass • In Those Jeans by Ginuwine • Bed Rock by Young Money ft Lloyd • Smooth Operator by Sade

pile three

personality

queen of pentacles • the sun • king of pentacles

Your future spouse’s personality is similar to the qualities of a wolf. They are loyal, territorial, intuitive, a leader, protective, and intelligent. They display healthy alpha male vibes and understand and know the power that they possess. Your future spouse is very sure of themselves and who they are. They know their worth and will never chase after anything because they know that what is meant for them will always come to them in due time.

Your future spouse is family oriented. They love their family for some. They may be the oldest, if they have siblings, or they are perceived to be very reliable and dependable by their family members. They desire to have a family one day. For some, your future spouse may have a strained or difficult relationship with his mother in some way.

Your future spouse is very conscious of their physical appearance. They are very put together and always will take great pride in their appearance, because they believe that appearances matter. They can be a bit self-absorbed or vain at times, but they know how to maintain a healthy balance to keep it under control. They also have a strong and healthy sense of self.

Your future spouse is extremely extroverted, they love to socialize and be around people of all walks of life. They get along with people pretty well and seem to be liked and envied by many who want to be like them, or possess what they have. Their personality is highly magnetic, warm, friendly, and larger than life. They are confident, optimistic, and have an infectious attitude. People naturally gravitate towards your person, they never have to try too hard to stand out.

Your person is very refined, mature, reliable, generous, nurturing, supportive, hardworking, trustworthy, wise, down to earth, humble, and patient person. They are strongly in tune with their masculine and feminine side, a very balanced individual. They can be a bit of a homebody at times, and prefer things to be grounded and balanced at times. They may have going through some challenges and hardships throughout their lives, but they never allowed the pain and discomfort that they endured to keep them from having an optimistic outlook on life.

Your person is very in tuned with their emotions. They can be a bit emotional than what they portray at first. They prefer to keep their emotions under wraps until they have established a stable and secure relationship with people in their lives. Once, they are comfortable with the people in their lives, they can be quite clingy / golden retriever qualities.

Your person is a powerful manifestor. They are able to manifest things they want in their lives through speaking, chanting, guided meditation or through scripting.

their astrological sign

This can apply for their sun, moon, rising, venus, and mars. This can apply to synastry as well.

Aries

Taurus, Venusian influence / dominant, 2nd house

Virgo

Capricorn

Leo placements, 1st house, Sun influence / dominant

Cancer, 4th house placements, Lunar influence / dominant

Scorpio, 8th house placements, Plutonian / Martian influence / dominant

Sagittarius, 9th house placements, Jupiterian influence / dominant

Aquarius

Libra or 7th house placements

Pisces

Gemini

physical appearance

the star • page of pentacles • the empress

Your future spouse’s hair color could range anywhere between blonde, red, light brown, to dark brown hair. They could have a type 1 or fine hair (fine to thin or thick to course).

Your future spouse can have hazel eyes, brown, or grey eyes. They have very beautiful and noticeable eyes, whether that’s the color or the shape of their eyes. They have a hypnotic and mesmerizing look in their eyes that will have you swooning and hooked, as if they are looking into your soul.

Your future spouse has a big or sizable package. If their genitalia is not big, they have aesthetically pleasing genitalia to look at. They are quite fertile.

Your future spouse can be short in height to average height.

Your future spouse has a beautiful and defined features. They have a defined and sharp jawline, slightly long chin, and narrow forehead. They are very handsome or conventionally attractive. For some, your person may be biracial or mixed raced (White/Black, Afro-Latino, Hispanic/Latino, or White). They have thick brows and lashes.

Your future spouse could have piercings.

Your future spouse could look like a celebrity or well-known public figure. I channeled a “singer” or “actor/actress”. They have an appearance that captivates people’s attention in some way. They receive a lot of attention or compliments on their appearance on a daily basis. It’s giving “pretty girl/boy” privilege or male model. Their skin is illuminating and clear, beautiful and healthy hair, vibrant eyes, and pretty smile. They also have sex appeal.

Your future spouse could be older than you or they have a very mature appearance in some way. I’m hearing “age like fine wine”, so it doesn’t matter if your person is younger or older, they will only get better with time, they give off dilf vibes. They have a rather muscular / solid built. This person takes care of their health and their body. They like to stay active and in shape. Your future spouse invest in themselves and their appearance, so they will always look presentable and dapper everywhere they go. They always look like they have their shit together, and they mean business. People find them hard to figure out because they don’t seem to share too much about themselves.

They have an aesthetically pleasing voice or there is something attractive about their neck / prominent Adam’s apple.

Your future spouse style can embody the “old money” aesthetic. They always look like money, or someone of great importance and prestige. Your person can be very picky and particular when it comes to the clothes they choose to wear and buy. They enjoy timeless and elegant pieces that will never go out of style and last forever. A polished and fine individual indeed. They know how to balance and style appropriately, they never overdo it, but know how to subtly show off their status and prestige. They tend to gravitate towards clothes that make them feel confident and appear strong. The songs I’m channeling are So Fresh, So Clean by OutKast and Suit & Tie by Justin Timberlake ft Jay-Z.

their love languages words of affirmation

Gratitude is the key word when it comes to how your future spouse feels for you. They are beyond grateful and appreciative for your presence in their lives. There aren’t enough words in the all the thousands of language in the world to describe how much you mean to your person. They can’t help but smile when they think about how lucky they are to have you in their lives, like they feel like they hit the jackpot with you in their lives. They value you and the relationship that the two of you built so much, and pray to continue to grow and build with you for all eternity. Your future spouse has no trouble in telling you how much they love and miss you. They will say it a million times proudly, they would even go as far to climb on top of the highest building and profess to the entire world their undying love for you, if they could. Your future spouse is also big on compliments. They will often tell you how beautiful you are and how proud they are of you when it comes to your work ethic or anything you put your mind to achieve. Your future spouse also appreciate compliments, so don’t be afraid to also encourage them and boost their ego.

quality time

Your future spouse is quite a planner and may enjoy putting time aside and effort to spend some time with you. You will never have to worry about them forgetting anniversaries or birthdays. They will try their best to make time for the two of you in their schedule, even when they have a lot of things going on behind the scenes. You mean a great importance to your future spouse and they will intend that you always have their undivided attention whenever they are with you, not wanting to miss a beat. They pay attention to the littlest details when it comes to planning romantic activities that the two of you can enjoy together. So you can expect romantic getaways, movie dates, dinner dates, and whatever else your future spouse has in store for you. This person’s goal is to unsure that the love between the two of you goes stagnant and that the sparks last forever. I’m channeling Anita Baker, “Caught Up in the Rapture” and Sparks Will Fly, J. Cole ft Jhene Aiko.

physical touch

Your future spouse is very affectionate. They absolutely love affection and will always crave to be close and intimate with you most of time. I channel that they love hugs, cuddles, or long embraces. They feel so safe when you are in their arms and they want you to feel safe when you are in their arms. I’m hearing “my little baby”. Your future spouse views you as someone they need to protect and shower in love at all cost. They can be a bit clingy at times, but it’s just their way of showing you how much they love and crave to be near you. They are quite gentle and loving when it comes to showing you physical affection, they enjoy building the momentum and intensity rather than rushing the process.

their profession

ten of cups • three of pentacles • king of wands

For some, your future spouse could have a career in following:

Your future spouse’s career could bring them a lot of happiness and emotional fulfillment. They seem to be very liked and appreciated by their superiors and coworkers, I’m hearing “most valuable worker”. Your future spouse has great leadership skills and is highly respected in their profession.

Entrepreneur

Environmentalist

Professor

Lawyer

A profession that requires them to network or work in groups or with others.

Construction Worker

Architect

Real Estate Agent

Non-Profit Organizer

Independent contractor

Digital Marketing

Your future spouse had to work incredibly hard to get where they are in their career. They may have experienced many ups and downs within their career, but finally found a career path that they were passionate about and inspired them to make a difference, not only in their lives, but for others as well.

Your future spouse may be required to travel for work, I channeled multiple months in the spread, so they are quite busy.

Whatever profession your future spouse is in, they make a decent amount of money.

For some, your future spouse could possibly be in the public eye or work with notable people.

how will you they treat you

Your future spouse will treat you as a “lady” or how a women is supposed to be treated. Your future spouse is very respectful when it comes to you, they will never try to disrespect you in anyway. They will never raise their voice or call you names whenever the two of you are at conflict and would rather communicate their thoughts and feelings with you in a respectful manner. They will try their best to listen to you and be receptive to your needs and wants. They want you to make you feel safe to remain in your feminine essence. They will always make sure that the initial spark continues to burn your relationship. You will never get bored with your person. They will do almost anything to keep the chemistry going between the two of you. Spontaneity is your future spouse’s middle name and fun is their game. They always want you to know that they are extremely attracted to you through their words and actions. They will make it feel like it’s the very first time throughout your connection.

queen of cups + nine of cups

Your person will be so nurturing, loving, supportive, and caring towards you. They genuinely want to make you happy and give you everything that you deserve and could possibly want. You will your future spouse so happy and adore you so much you. They feel like they won the jackpot ( I’m channeling I Won by Future ft Kanye West). You are everything your spouse manifested or ever wanted in partner. They will always remain faithful and loyal to you, as long as you reciprocate as well. They will always be there to support and lend a hand whenever you need them. They will always celebrate you, your accomplishments, and give your flowers. You satisfy and bring so much happiness and joy in your future spouse’s life and for that they are super grateful for you.

knight of swords + ace of swords

Your future spouse will always keep it real with you. They will never lie to you or withhold anything from you. They want the relationship between the two of you to be honest and progressive. They want to find solutions to any issues that the two of you encounter, rather than dwell on the problem. Your person is also very protective of you, they will not allow anyone to disrespect you and will defend you, if necessary. They will not be afraid to confront any issues and are mature enough to hold themselves accountable if they did anything wrong when appropriate. They also want to serve as an inspiration for you to go after whatever you want and to accomplish what you want.

four of wands + six of cups

Your future spouse wants to build a stable foundation for the two of you. They want to build and enjoy a happy family life and will desire to grow an even strong bond with you. They want to have fun with you and build beautiful and carefree memories together. They want to reach every milestone with you and even grow old and die right by your side. They want to look back on the past as a reminder of what the two you have been able to overcome and achieve together.

their sexual style

Immediately , I got the vibe that your future spouse will be away from you a lot, this could apply if they are require to travel for work months on end . To keep the connection solid and fun between you and your spouse, I channeled a lot of steamy phone calls, text, and photos being exchanged between you and them. Cyber sex is very prevalent in this reading. I definitely see you sending explicit photos or videos to your person while they are away to keep their mind spinning and longing for more. I heard intuitively a “ little forget me not” I see an image of you showing them a new lingerie set that you just bought and mercilessly teasing them, and this literally driving them overboard with lust and the urge to rush back home to have their way with you. I am also seeing lots of masturbation as well, together or whenever they are missing you and craving, they like to look and relieve themselves to your photos and videos when they are alone at night. I also pick up there is a lot of doubt and fear surrounding, if your person is being unfaithful while they are away, or this is their fear when it comes to you, but i sense, you or your future spouse have nothing to worry about. “I Only Have Eyes For You by The Flamingos just came to mind, as I channeled how they feel about you. Your future spouse believes that you are their soulmate, their true love, and their one and only. I intuitively heard, Forever My Lady by Jodeci. Your future spouse really hates the distance between you and them, and they are undoubtedly regretful and apologetic that they haven’t spent enough time with you as they would like, but they plan to make up for lost time and give you everything you have been missing. “Get ready to back all that sh*t up” is what I channeled. Take it if it resonates, but your future spouse may need reassurance from you at times, during intimate moments. Your future spouse tends to overthink when it comes to pleasuring you . They want to pleasure you, but sometimes, they think they aren’t doing enough or they don’t know exactly how they make you feel. They try to look for some type of signal from you and are more than open to listen and learn what your desires are. I sense that they tend to be the initiators most of the time, but there is a message of them wanting you to initiate and take the lead for a change. The reason for this is because they want the both of you to be on the same page and connected in every aspect, emotionally, sexually, mentally, and spiritually as well.

keywords

Until the End of Time by Justin Timberlake ft Beyoncé • let’s take our time, we got all night • feeding you grapes • licking chocolate off you • Soon As I Get Home by Faith Evans • making up for lost time • they like you in red • shower sex • “suck it, while you me look in my eyes” • “I’ll show you how much I missed you” • fuck you until we both come undone • Make It To The Morning by PND • backshots • FaceTime calls • daddy’s home • sex playlist • Tonight by Summer Walker • flashbacks • the sounds of making love • sensual lover • “do you have any idea how much I love and miss you” • sex toys • high sex drive • going for rounds • “I’m going to give you a night you won’t ever forget” • ride my face • “who you belong to” • food play • Kama Sutra • You Know How To Make Me Feel So Good by Harold Marvin & The Blue Notes • tell / show me exactly what you want, and I’ll do it • setting the mood • connecting to the senses • slow and gentle caressing • The Closer I Get To You by Donny Hathaway ft Roberta Fleck • wet dreams • touching with intention • paying attention your body signals • “I can never get enough of you” • slow and steady wins the race • Electric by Alina Baraz ft Khalid • don’t hold back, any longer • experimenting with new things • neck kisses • hands tangled in your hair • sexting • tracing fingers • memorizing your body • deep and endless breathing • build up • sexual frustration • moaning and groaning • “I miss your scent” • don’t get shy now • Drunk in Love ( Jay-Z verse) • cum over and over again • You Should’ve Wore Your Bonnet 21 Savage ft Brent Faiyaz • sex tape• NSFW • Neighbors Know My Name by Trey Songz • back massages • Recognize by PND ft Drake • burning with desire • I want to hold you tight and never let go • interlocking hands • flavored lubricants • You Be Killin Em by Fabulous • bubble bath together • holding your hair while you suck it • squirting • cum play • have my babies • Love to Love You Baby by Donna Summer • Water by Tyla • wet sheets • Bonjour by NO1-NOAH ft Summer Walker

#Spotify #future spouse #pac reading #tarotbydelilah444 #tarotblr #vday #18+ tarot #tarot reader #pick a card tarot #love reading

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astrolook · 2 months ago

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The shady / bitchy side of each sun signs

Sun in Aries ♈

You bore them = You’re dead to them.

Starts fights, then says "Why is everyone mad?"

��No, I didn’t ghost you. I just lost interest.”

Road rage in human form.

Impatient? No. They just hate slow people.

Sun in Taurus ♉

Calls you cheap but steals your fries.

Will say “I hate drama” then sit front row.

Will never share their blanket.

Lazy but will fight you over food.

You didn't text back in 2 days? Blocked.

Sun in Gemini ♊

"No, I never said that" (they did).

Lies for fun (but you still love them).

Bored? Time to stir the pot.

They say they love you—to 5 people at once.

Fake laughing their way through life.

Sun in Cancer ♋

Holds grudges like family heirlooms.

Stalks their ex’s social media .

Baby or demon? Depends on the hour.

Will cry while roasting you.

"Tell me everything" (then judges).

Sun in Leo ♌

You didn't like their post? Blocked.

"I’m humble" (they’re not).

"I hate attention" (LOL, sure).

Fishes for compliments like a full-time job.

Has fans, not friends.

Sun in Virgo ♍

Corrects your grammar in texts.

Passive-aggressive but says "I’m just helping."

"No offense, but…" (It’s offensive.)

"I’ll fix it" (more like control everything.)

Will remember the text you sent them 5 years ago, down to the time you sent and probably has a screenshot of it somewhere in their hidden app.

Sun in Libra ♎

Their "Oops, my bad" has ruined lives.

Flirts with everyone, even your grandma/grandpa.

Can never say no but complains later.

Wants balance = Starts chaos.

Smiles while talking mad shit.

Sun in Scorpio ♏

Loves you? Hates you? Both.

Master of emotional blackmail.

Knows your weakness and will use it.

Smiles in your face, curses you at home.

Will disappear for 3 weeks, no warning.

Sun in Sagittarius ♐

"I love honesty!" (Lies constantly.)

Here today, gone tomorrow.

Loves you but forgets your birthday.

"No drama!" (Total chaos magnet.)

Talks, then leaves mid-convo.

Sun in Capricorn ♑

No emotions, just deadlines.

Roasts you but calls it "constructive criticism."

Hates you but won’t say it.

Works like a CEO, spends like a peasant.

Loves money, hates people who asks them for money.

Sun in Aquarius ♒

Listens, then ignores all advice.

"Rules?" (They laugh in rebellion.)

Emotionally unavailable but curious.

Will debate you for 6 hours.

Weird for fun, distant by default.

Sun in Pisces ♓

Spaced out 90% of the time.

Romanticizes toxic exes.

"I forgive you" (No, they don’t.)

"I’m psychic" (but can’t see red flags).

"I love peace" (but attracts toxic people for sport).

And that’s the zodiac, raw and unfiltered—no mercy, just vibes. If you’re offended, blame your birth chart, not me. Now go be the messy legend the stars intended you to be!

Curious about your birth chart and what it's really saying about you? 🌟 Slide into my DMs for a personalized astrology reading, and let's unlock the secrets of your stars. ✨ Don’t forget to check out my pinned post for pricing details! 🔮 Let’s make those cosmic connections happen! 🌙🌌

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harmoonix · 9 months ago

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🤍 𝔇𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔪𝔢𝔯𝔰 🐎

𝓐𝓼𝓽𝓻𝓸𝓵𝓸𝓰𝔂 𝓞𝓫𝓼𝓮𝓻𝓿𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷𝓼

🐎 I observed that Capricorn/Aquarius and Scorpio Venus tend not to fall that much in love relationships, definitely not as crazy about their love life rather more about their careers

🐎 Venus in the 11H or 11° 23° since the 11th house is related to the desires, these natives usually have a lot of desires/wishes towards their love life

🐎 Saturn in the 1H/6H/10H/12H are kinda anxious when starting something new because they are known to work and focus on the same thing for a long time, when it comes to starting something new it can be a challenge for them

🐎 Mars aspecting Saturn harshly, and if one of those planets is in the 7H, can indicate being patient in the couple - arguing/fight moments,

🐎 Chiron aspecting Venus or Moon can definitely go up for couple therapy when is needed because it can help

🐎 Cancers and Gemini placements can be good at crafting/creating. Cancers definitely for traditional crafting at home/homemade

🐎 Mars in Aries/in 1H or ar 1° 13° 25° is a known fact that these natives get irritated fast. They have an inner anger that comes out in random moments

🐎 Uranus in the 10H natives or Urnaus at 10° 22° probably have a desire/dream to end up successful at some point in their lives

🐎 Pisces/Gemini/Aquarius and Sagittarius Placements can be interested in space and physics/chemistry, I know so many of them who just love staying in a laboratory doing stuff

─────────────────────

Here I am, so young and strong

Right here in the place where we belong

─────────────────────

🐎 Cancer or Moon in your 7H can indicate a deep need for being nurtured or to nurture others in a relationship

🐎 Scorpio Placements are usually seen as the 'bad guys', but they were the ones to meet the most bad guys in their lives... like these people went through a lot

🐎 Aries/Scorpio/Sagittarius/Capricorn in the 3H can make a person bitter/colder in conversations and is usually when they are being verbally attacked by others

🐎 If we think about it Aquarius/Capricorn and Sagittarius Venus need a lot of freedom in their relationship, they love their relationship but also having some time for yourself is vital

🐎 Leo Venus/Moon/Rising really loves to get compliments. It is a nice thing to feel seen or appreciated by others

🐎 Aries and Pisces Venus needs a lot of trust in their relationship, don't be afraid to trust your partner, if they really love you, they wouldn't lie

🐎 Venus in Virgo/6H or at 6° and 18° is a really lovely placement because it talks about a devoted partner, probably someone picky as well

🐎 Juno aspecting Pluto can indicate a partner or relationship that will change you, so that means you won't be the same you after that relationship

🐎 North Node being less aspected can indicate confusion about what to do with your life next but also having it easier to go through your life stages

🐎 Capricorn Placements are wise since young and are a big indicator of an old soul. They will be more wise with their age

🐎 North Node aspecting Venus in both harsh and good aspects stands for finding a love for yourself, to appreciate yourself

🐎 Saturn aspecting the ascendant natives can isolate themselves from the world, it's like a coping mechanism to help them

🐎 If you have Mars in the 9H and you're in a relationship/marriage, you can have some sort of tension with your partner's parents or family

🐎 Pluto in your 8H/12H can indicate a good intuition but also a strong native because you'll have to go through hardships involving your own evolution

🐎 When you have 9H/12H placements and you haven't moved away from your homeland, you can end wish or crave that, you can crave for moving away

─────────────────────

I've been waiting for you

Here I am

─────────────────────

🐎 Mercury - Venus/Jupiter - Neptune/Mercury - Moon aspects in your chart bring creativity, you can have a creative mind

🐎 Saturn in the 1H/5H/8H helps with the self - improvement over the years, like you get better with the years/in the future

🐎 Most times, an earth Venus will look for stability in a love relationship. If they can't find it, they will just look for it

🐎 Jupiter aspecting Mars natives will get angry easily, and the fun thing is that.. you can see it on their faces..they cannot hide the anger

🐎 Harsh aspects between Sun and Moon can make you hate yourself at times and usually come from the imperfections of yourself. We are all imperfect and we should appreciate that

🐎 Spirit is such a childhood core, yet it feels like a fever dream. The emotional baggage of this movie is crazy. 🐎

#astrology #astro observations #astroblog #birth chart #astro notes #astrology observations #placements #astro community #horoscope #ascendant #astrologers #astro #astroseek #astrocom #spirit #horse #horse aesthetic

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mstase · 10 months ago

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DESCRIBING THE MOON SIGNS

some of these are based on the people I’ve met, so you may not resonate with some of it. there are also probably other aspects in your birth chart that say otherwise, so please read this with a grain of salt.

♨️ aries moon - such people have a subtle yet sharp look, often with a prominent feature like a wide forehead or a generally strong build. their fiery emotions are written all over their face, and you can spot their short fuse from a mile away. they’re not the type to bottle things up; it’s more like they need to let it out, erupting like a volcano. these folks are impulsive, prone to sudden outbursts, but surprisingly, they don’t hold onto grudges—they move on as fast as they flare up. they tend to have mood swings, being all emotional one minute and totally chill the next. there’s this childlike energy about them—they get hyped up easily and are full of passion. but just like kids, they can be pretty immature when it comes to handling their feelings. when they were young, they might have fought a lot due to their impatient nature and tendency to react quickly and get frustrated, but they eventually grow out of it. i know some aries moon peeps who get physical when they can’t calm down like throwing stuff, kicking around, or yelling and screaming to let out that frustration.

🍥 taurus moon - they’re really laid-back to be around, always giving off a calming vibe. picture doe eyes and soft, prominent cheek, kind of like a bambi. these individuals are typically grounded and don’t easily get irritated, but they know when to assert their boundaries. they prefer doing their own thing and steer clear of drama. however, they can be quite stubborn and once they’re fixated on something, it’s hard to sway them. emotions tend to linger with them for a long time because they manage them steadily and slowly. one thing about them: they despise being rushed. like typical taureans, they take their time with things and enjoy a slower pace. when they feel emotionally unsettled, they seek comfort, even if it’s not always the healthiest option, it helps them escape. they thrive in cozy, gentle environments, feeling most at ease when they’re at home. quite possessive people and can come across as controlling at times, especially with those they like; they tend to be fond of physical touch.

🗣️ gemini moon - they have really expressive eyes that light up when something catches their interest. always cracking jokes and endlessly curious, they’re a blast to be around. a bit scattered sometimes, but they’re great at keeping a conversation going. sharp as a tack, they might seem like a clown sometimes, but they’re actually deep thinkers. they are prone to mood swings; their minds are constantly buzzing with a million thoughts, which also impacts their mood. however, they don’t really express or dwell on these emotions much because their minds are wrapped up in their interests, which can make them come across as emotionally closed off. at other times, they tend to rationalize their emotions rather than genuinely feeling them. these people get extremely bored easily, constantly needing mental stimulation. hence, they have a need to always ask questions, to know everything and understand how things work, in order to keep their minds busy. they could be the type who has trouble sleeping because their minds won’t quiet down, and the same goes for their mouth.

🦀 cancer moon - very emotionally receptive, they can easily read and understand others just as much as they crave understanding for their own feelings. they feel things deeply and take it all to heart, often needing space to process. naturally nurturing, they care very deeply and want it to be acknowledged. they might be the one looking out for their siblings or the ’mom’ figure in their friend circle. when upset, they can be passive-aggressive, but most of the time, they keep their pain to themselves. their heightened sensitivity makes them get hurt more easily than others, which is why they sometimes come off as defensive. these people have a hard time moving on from the past and like to reminisce a lot. they remember every single thing, the good and the bad stuff people did to them, and when they’re not feeling right, they tend to hold onto grudges.

⚜️ leo moon - they are all about expressing themselves creatively, typically through singing and/or dancing. they are incredibly generous and always there for the people they cherish. however, i’ve noticed they can struggle with self-esteem, leading them to seek validation and acceptance. they have fragile egos and are extremely sensitive to criticism, often feeling challenged in their accomplishments or goals, even when that’s not the case. when they feel validated, they bring good vibes, filling up the room with warm, loving, and super enthusiastic energy—that’s just how they give back. they are prone to dramatic displays of emotions, often without realizing it, due to their naturally expressive and fierce nature. i’ve also noticed that they tend to talk a lot about themselves and may unintentionally interrupt or overlap in other people’s conversations. this can make them appear conceited, but they are just really eager to share a lot about themselves.

🔍 virgo moon - they’re super helpful, sometimes a bit too much, and very responsible. it’s like they think no one else is gonna sort stuff out, so they always step up as the “fixer” even when it’s not really their problem. they’re just really big on analyzing everything to get to the bottom of things. they can often seem all critical and constantly nitpicking, but really, it’s their way of helping you improve and showing they care. they notice every tiny detail, and if something’s off, it bugs them big time—total perfectionists. they’re pretty hard on themselves, likely due to early expectations and responsibilities weighing on them. they worry a ton, even about the small stuff, sometimes to an unhealthy level of obsession. they need a lot of alone time to process these thoughts, as they’re highly sensitive to their surroundings, which doesn’t quite help with their anxious tendencies. they can be self-conscious and prefer to keep their emotions in check, often analyzing their surroundings to gauge if it’s safe enough to express how they feel.

🧁 libra moon - these people are easy to hang out with—chill, laid-back, and down-to-earth. they prefer to keep things peaceful, so they can be somewhat passive and struggle to say no because they dislike upsetting people, which heavily impacts how they feel about themselves. confrontations aren’t their thing either, and setting boundaries isn’t their strong suit. they value fairness, detest any kind of injustice, and adhere to their morals. they’re open-minded, always looking at things from different angles, which makes people feel comfortable talking to them about anything. (they are also great listeners). they can be overly concerned about how they appear as they have a strong need to feel ”pretty” and liked. when decisions need to be made, they’re very indecisive and tend to let their friends choose for them. they dislike aggression and are put off by unnecessary meanness, as they themselves keep their less pleasant emotions in control without necessarily suppressing them. most people i’ve met with this have good facial harmony and are pleasing to look at.

🦂 scorpio moon - they might not seem like they’re paying attention, but believe me, they’re tuned in. you’ll be amazed by the random stuff they pick up just from quietly observing things and people. sometimes they don’t even have to actively watch; they just get it with one look, seeing through the facade because they operate similarly, like hiding behind that secretive and mysterious wall that they cling onto. they have zero tolerance for dishonesty, and the ones i’ve met with this are extremely blunt. nothing gets past them; they can sniff out lies or insincerity from a mile away. like all water signs, they’re super sensitive but get triggered easily. oh, and they can hold a grudge forever. they’ll remember what you did to them five years ago and still think you haven’t changed. they might seem chill on the outside, but inside, there’s a whirlwind of intense emotions that can erupt suddenly. they probably struggle with talking about their feelings and, with their secretive nature, you’ll never really know what’s going on with them.

🎃 sagittarius moon - adventurous folks who are always down for a good time, even if it gets them into trouble. they find optimism and humor in everything, so it’s pretty easy to lighten up their mood. they’re strong-willed and passionate about their feelings, not holding back when they speak their mind. sometimes they crack jokes at the wrong time or in a way that might offend—it’s just their impulsive nature. despite that, they’re incredibly cheerful and goofy, always ready to laugh and spread their enthusiastic energy. sometimes they can come off as ’know-it-alls’ without trying to be arrogant; they’re just super into their optimistic wisdom. many of them may have travelled a lot growing up or just liked to wander outside instead of staying indoors—the type who were always out exploring the city. they dislike uptight, dependent people; they need someone who can loosen up and loves freedom as much as they do. being tied down in any way is their worst nightmare, so good luck trying to control them.

💼 capricorn moon - these people can keep their cool even in tough situations. they’re not into big emotional displays and often come off as closed off or shy. it takes them a while to open up because they don’t think it’s necessary. although they are not unemotional; in fact, they care and love very deeply but are more private about it. they probably grew up in a household where showing emotions was restricted, or they had to grow up fast due to responsibilities. they might also have a hard time showing vulnerability and are super protective of themselves. they’re incredibly self-reliant and independent and sometimes feel guilty about asking for help. they give the best advice, but don’t count on it to cheer you up because they’re all about logic and practicality. sometimes, they keep their problems to themselves because they don’t like feeling like a burden to anyone, or they simply feel like no one cares.

🌀 aquarius moon - constantly feeling misunderstood, they feel like people talk more than they know. are humanitarian, but at the same time, they hate people. they are highly observant and can naturally grasp people’s minds and behaviors. they cherish their independence and personal space, which means they don’t do well with clingy people. consequently, they keep most people, including friends, at arm’s length. these people are pretty good at hiding their emotions. they aren’t likely to be very grand in expressing how they feel, which is why they can sometimes come across as detached. at times, they just process their emotions differently. i see them as being more rational and logical in their approach. also, they may find it challenging or uneasy to cope with deep feelings of vulnerability. very super accepting of people because they’ve been there themselves—being the odd one out. intelligent people can sometimes be very stubborn and think they are always right.

🐟 pisces moon - they are very empathetic and compassionate, making them great listeners. however, they often feel emotionally overwhelmed because they easily absorb other people’s pains and problems. sometimes, they struggle to understand and express their own emotions due to their impressionable nature. highly sensitive to their surroundings, they pick up on every subtle detail that others often miss, which can be overwhelming. they also find themselves easily drained in busy environments, constantly absorbing the emotions and energies around them. therefore, they require ample downtime in peaceful, quiet settings to recharge. they can feel like their needs get ignored and that they end up giving way more than they get back. one thing about them, though, is they tend to be very passive to the point where they can easily be taken advantage of, which is something they need to work on to build more assertion. the people i’ve met with this moon were exceptionally talented, whether in art, writing, or any other form of expression.

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prettieinpink · 3 months ago

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LITTLE WAYS TO LIVE HEALTHIER IN 2025

INCREASE YOUR N.E.A.T. Neat stands for non exercise activity thermogenesis. So, basically any daily activities we do when not exercising or sleeping. It's important for you to have a high N.E.A.T because it can be the difference between having a sedentary lifestyle or being moderately active.

Ways to increase NEAT is to do more heavier chores everyday (vacuuming, mopping, dusting), taking the longer routes when walking, stand for 10 minutes each hour, pace back and forth while calling someone, march while you’re brushing your teeth, etc.

DRINK HERBAL TEAS. Herbal teas can help you in a variety of areas of life, and are a great substitute for other processed beverages.

ADD SUNLIGHT IN YOUR MORNING. Exposing yourself to sunlight early in the day helps with resetting the circadian rhythm, which in return helps for waking up easier and going to sleep easier.

EAT WITHOUT DISTRACTIONS. You’ll savour your food so much more and it’ll be easier to tell when you’re satisfied.

CREATE A PLAYLIST FOR WHEN YOU WIND DOWN. Once you get into the habit of listening to this playlist, it’ll become like a trigger to your body that it’s time to sleep because listening to that playlist should be followed by settling into bed.

REGULARLY GO TO YOUR GP. Especially if you’re feeling a bit out of it. It is always better to make those regular visits and catch something before it becomes out of hand.

STOP WAKING UP SO EARLY. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but waking up at 5am is unnecessary if not required. While I do believe that waking up earlier does have benefits, that extra hour of sleep probably has more.

IF YOU’RE STRUGGLING, TAKE IT SLOWER. In this day and age, we don’t have time to process a lot of things. Everything is so fast paced, that if we fall behind, we tend to feel less than.

Especially if you’re someone who can’t keep pace with the crowd due to disabilities or mental health. Take things at your own pace, and do what you can will yourself to do.

GET SPIRITUAL. Lots of studies show that people who commit themselves to their beliefs are a lot happier in life than those who don’t. This doesn’t mean that you have to commit to a religion yet, but I would explore your spirituality side and see what resonates with you.

WEAR YOUR SPF. Skin cancer is no joke, and our earth is only getting hotter. Protect yourself, including your body!

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH GOOD PEOPLE. People who radiate love and are always looking for the goodness around them, that rubs off on you and in return you’ll develop similar traits. Being with them will stimulate growth in all aspects of your life.

I'm not telling anyone to ‘fix’ anyone, but it means a lot to other people if you can be that person in their life. It's a very rewarding and fulfilling lifestyle.

TAKE MAKEUP BREAKS REGULARLY. Give your skin a break from products, and ideally take a week off each month to spend it makeup free. You’re saving time and your skin.

ADD IN FRUITS, HERBS OR LEMON IN YOUR WATER. This will help with extra hydration and improve digestion.

PRIORITISE FIBRE. As much as protein is good for you, fibre has just as much importance but it's not as heavily prioritised. Ideally, half of your meal should be fibres. However, that can be a hard change for some people, so start with having it on the side.

It's great if you can incorporate ‘hidden’ fibre into your meals as well!

CURATE YOUR SPACE TO SUIT YOU. Add in little notes of reminders or quotes, place around photos or awards of your achievements, remove anything that impacts you negatively. You want the area that you’re in 24/7 to support that growth, not stifle it.

Keep your area clean and decluttered as well. Try to minimise the amount of stuff that you have. You only need one of each thing, two is one too many. Having too much clutter affects the clarity of your mind.

it is numbered oddly because of the way I pasted this from google docs to tumblr. apologies!

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punksocks · 2 years ago

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Astrology Observation: No.24 (18+ Only)

No minors! Adults only pls

Just based on my opinions only take what resonates

-Water moons/mars are the most likely to just say they love you during s*x (they may mean it too !); Can happen to fire moon/mars too but they may not mean it after the moment; Earth Moon/Mars will not be saying anything without planning well in advance (Earth moon AND Mars, you will not catch them slip lmao); I’d assume Air Moon/Mars would be the most likely to tease the other person(s) and say just about anything but I love you

-Venus aspects to Mars/ Taurus/Libra mars/ Venus and/or Mars in 2nd could really enjoy dressing up in lingerie and setting up a s*xy atmosphere in general (and your partner would enjoy this too !)

-1st/2nd /7th/8th house Venus, Scorpio Venus, Venus conjunct Pluto/ sometimes 12th house venus you may get compliments on your genitals from people during s*x (like told you have a pretty p*ssy lol yea fr)

-1st /8th house mars, Aries mars, Scorpio mars/Mars conjunct Pluto/sometimes 12th house mars would also be this for those in their masc energy (instead of pretty someone might admire the aggressive look of your junk instead)

-Imo the easiest sexual partners to discuss boundaries and such with will be partners that have easy (conjunct/trine/Sextile) mars aspects to your Mercury and/or moon

-I know we’d assume that mars in 8th is the most s*xual but I’d argue that mars in 12th is also super s*xual. Intimacy tends to be heavy on the mind, and there’s a higher chance of mirroring s*xual energy back to others. Especially if the native acts out of their masc/mars energy

-i’d think Aries, Leo, and Scorpio mars would be the most into their partner being SO attracted to them they can’t keep their hands off of them and/or finish too fast (least likely with Scorpio unless you’re just really over stimulating them, most likely with Aries- the most veracious Aries mars go rounds imo)

-I’d argue and assume that air mars/3rd house mars are spacing out the hardest during s*x, and I bet it’s not on purpose (just bouncing between thoughts and coming back to what’s going on)(also if you keep their attention, you’re doing something right)

-Water mars could mean you sleep around for emotional validation (…Imma say it… cancer mars has the strongest chances lol)

-I think your Venus and mars together can show if you’re more of a sub or dom imo (like if they’re both cardinal you’re probably a dom, if they’re mutable then you may be a switch/sub, and if they’re fixed I’d think you’d be hard set on being a sub or dom — and then results may vary depending on the combination of signs and how much of your feminine or masculine energy you act out of.)

-I think Scorpio Venus/Mars makes someone more dominant in s*x than Aries mars/Venus imo (they’re not here to win, they’re here to posses you- that’s so intense man)

-Understated praise kink placements? Virgo moon/mars. They need to hear praises for how well they did or they’re gonna overthink it. Libra/Taurus mars also would like this. And Venus square/opposition Mars would too in a tell me how much you want me sort of way (it makes them feel really desired)

-Tumblr ruined me bc now every time I look up a dudes birth chart and see Sagittarius mars/Jupiter positively aspecting mars I’m like damn, do they just have bde or actually have a big d*ck and I feel bad for guessing lmao but now it’s so automatic

-Strong Lilith placements (1st/7th/8th/10th) can show guys pressuring you to perform their like shadow side fantasies (which is not cool, because where’s the consent? We always need to discuss things beforehand and map out a plan otherwise it’s skeezy behavior -unless you’re into being surprised but even then lol)

-Gemini placements (the big 6, but especially mars) make you louder in bed. And more open to trying new things and switching up positions.

-5th house synastry is really s*xy and fun. Some of the best dates and relationships imo. It also allows you to open up and experiment in a way you never have before. Can keep a long term relationship exciting as well depending on the overall synastry. (Be careful bc this is the pregnancy overlay too oml)

-I think north node in 5th can (depending on the sign and aspects ofc) can point to indulging in the senses, partying, breakin hearts and hookin up a bunch— especially if you’re unbalanced/still learning to balance this with your south node energy

-(in sing songy voice) Scorpio synastry is someone telling you s*x with you makes them f*cking crazy (No they are not kidding ! Lilith synastry is this on steroids but it feels more like you’re lighting this fire in the more masc person - and they’re afraid of burning imo (I’m not singing any more lol)

-I hold to the fact that Lilith in 1st/7th/8th/10th can make someone jump into bed with you way faster than they usually would even if they have like an earth or water mars, if you have Lilith synastry with them this is amplified

-Masc folks/Men with Taurus and/or Cancer in their big 6 (especially mars/venus) are very attracted to women/femmes that are curvy and have an hourglass figure. Aries placements tend to be attracted to athletic figures. Leo placements are likely to jump at figures they find attention grabbing. Libra/Scorpio placement men are more likely to be attracted to figures that they’re socialized to find s*xy. I find that Sagittarius/Pisces is the least likely to have a set type. Aquarius and Gemini are also pretty dependent on personality and conversation skills.

#astro observations #astro community #astro notes #astroblr #spicy astrology #scorpio venus #Aries mars #Scorpio mars #cancer mars #Virgo mars #Leo mars #lilith astrology #8th hokage #12th house #libra mars #Taurus mars #Sagittarius mars #5th house

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keferon · 5 months ago

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About the whole sparks giving off radiation thing

Imagine Prowl finding out he gave Jazz an incurable disease because he got too close. Omg He wouldn’t forgive himself for that and would actively push Jazz away and keep a long distance between them.

Jazz tryna reassure him that neither of them could’ve known that would happen and its not his fault and please don’t leave-. He’s dying but his friend won’t come near him anymore.

Anyway this au caught me in a chokehold and I’m thankful for it.

Prowl discover that humans don't live long and it makes him really sad.

Then he find out that his own spark was actively poisoning Jazz this whole time and making his already short life span even shorter and this knowledge is eating him alive because yeah he's ready to give up anything for Jazz but at the same time his very presence is harmful.

This is up until Jazz explains to him that as a pilot he had to experience a lot of fucked up procedures that made him compatible with mecha technology. That his brain will probably be fried from neural connection waaay before the space cancer could even start showing.

...I imagine all that pieces of lore would make Prowl incredibly angry haha

#mecha pilot jazz au

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kairologia · 1 year ago

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Your untapped talents according to your fifth house.

In traditional astrology, being Venus’ joy, the fifth house is (among others) a signifier for natural talents, as well as hobbies you would enjoy most or thrive at.

Which are yours?

· Aries in the 5th house (Sagittarius rising): you possess a proficiency in competitive or energetic sports and activities, a natural ability to lead a team, an uncanny ability to face & overcome your fears, as well as high stamina & endurance. Steadfast in your beliefs and capable of debating in their favour anytime of the day.

· Taurus in the 5th house (Capricorn rising): you’re naturally talented in gardening & cultivating a beautiful, lush & luxuriant outdoor space, effortlessly skilled in arts like painting, sculpture, or pottery, and excellent at cultivating artistic talent in others (would make a great art professor).

· Gemini in the 5th house (Aquarius rising): you have unrivaled storytelling and writing skills, an innate versatility in performing arts such as acting or comedy, & skilled in employing incisive language to convey complex ideas or emotions. You may have a talent for photography, drawing, or manual/visual arts.

· Cancer in the 5th house (Pisces rising): you’re skilled in acting out intense scenes or writing emotionally charged stories, talented in interior design and making every new place you inhabit feel like home. Usually talented in cooking &/or baking. Great swimmers too.

· Leo in the 5th house (Aries rising): Leo fifth houses are highly creative in fashion-related endeavors such as designing clothing items or costumes, have natural flair for performing arts and a natural ability to captivate an audience or command attention. Great at improvising and coming up with stories on the fly.

· Virgo in the 5th house (Taurus rising): you’re talented in crafts like knitting or woodworking, editing or artistic critique, photography. You’re the go-to person for event organization & planning. Skilled at DIY crafting projects, scrapbooking, manual creations such as jewelry making or ceramic works. Great debators, too.

· Libra in the 5th house (Gemini rising): you have outstanding diplomatic skills & are capable of negotiating your way through just about any situation. You're skilled in creating harmonious compositions in visual arts or music. You would definitely enjoy ballroom dancing, painting, & decorating spaces. You also have a natural sense for aesthetics & beauty.

· Scorpio in the 5th house (Cancer risings): you would make a great taboo/erotica/crime fiction writer or visual artist. You're also talented in writing intense and charged scenes or lyrics, & are capable of evoking strong emotions through artistic expression. You would probably enjoy investigating mysteries & delving into occultism.

· Sagittarius in the 5th house (Leo rising): you’re amazing at inspiring others through creative expression, great at documenting experiences through photography or journaling whether in remote destinations or within your hometowns & making the mundane seem interesting. You’d make a great writer of philosophical or esoterical fiction or analysis.

· Capricorn in the 5th house (Virgo rising): usually great at forms of art that demand focus and discipline. you're the type of person that can master more than one classical instrument if you were to put your heart into it. You would enjoy collecting antiques as a hobby, & have potential to be an eloquent & articulate speaker & writer.

· Aquarius in the 5th house (Libra rising): terrific at advocating for social change & making unheard voices feel heard through artistic or creative expression, and creating experimental or avant-garde works. Potential great musicians. The type of person who can turn even the blandest looking items into something uniquely gorgeous.

· Pisces in the 5th house (Scorpio rising): you have an innate versatile talent at anything creative as you’re capable of creating immersive artistic experiences that can even cloud the senses. Potential talent for dancing, occult or spiritual pursuits and intuitive painting as well. Would definitely enjoy swimming & marine life exploration.

P.S : one configuration cannot describe your entire experience. you may not relate to certain points, as you have had life experiences that shaped you and an entire chart consisting of inextricable elements that need one another to make sense.

Click here for readings !

#astrology #astro notes #astrological observations #hellenistic astrology #astro observations #astrology signs #astrology readings #zodiac #5H #5th house #fifth house #rising signs #venus

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1-800-local-slut · 19 days ago

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Space Girl

She's out of this world and in his bed! Meet SuperNova, a humanoid alien who loves everything Earth has to offer. And she loves Mark just as much

Mark Grayson x Black! Alien! Reader

Warning: reader and mark break up and get back together, mentions of smut, it's kind of a long one, but all that aside I hope you enjoy and consider sending requests, leaving comments and likes! <3

Note: you're from a planet called Aurelix, it's a peaceful planet but its people are warriors with a gentle temperament. All the people from this planet have glowing eyes, it can be hidden with contacts. It's basically Earth with way better technology and everyone has powers. Also, you can fly and create burst of energy, your powers are cosmic control due to a genetic experiment and yeah that's it, that's all! Eve and Mark don't have feelings for each other here, man stealing is never the move guys

༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺༻༺

For as often as he does it, Mark sometimes felt shame for flying. He felt shame for soaring through the air on a regular basis even though it was part of his genetic makeup. Biologically, he should fly. Logically, he should fly with no guilt. He trained to fly, he likes flying. It's more natural to him than walking sometimes. Yet he can never forget why he can fly. Why his body gave him the strength to destroy lives just as easily as he can save them.

At the end of each day, Mark was a Viltrumite. From a race of brutes who use that same flight to take over worlds and murder anyone who objects. No matter how human he was, Mark would always have something evil inside him. A cancer that no amount of treatment could cure.

That shame keeps him human, as much as he wished he didn't feel it. Others from different planet's didn't get it. Full humans definitely wouldn't get it. And you? You didn't even come close to understanding. Not without trying though.

Mark could never forget when he first saw you. It was warm out, nice and airy with just the right amount of breeze flowing. The house next door received new occupants and settled in quickly it seemed. From his bedroom window, which faced your backyard, he saw you.

Flying in a game of tag with your mother and father, chasing each other with water guns. None of that mattered. The sun caught your skin, which seemed to glow under the light and your curly hair was tied into a gorgeous bundle of mini twist that was then wrapped into a ponytail. Pieces escaped on your face, the rest moved behind you with each turn and twist you made against the backdrop of the cotton candy clouds.

Mark wasn't exactly super-duper careful about who saw him flying but he also wasn't flying around in circles with his dad in the backyard. Anyone could've seen but you didn't care. Infact, you laughed as your mother sprayed you in the face with water and you sprayed her back in response. Flying around care free without an ounce of shame or fear for doing something so natural to you. And for a split second he felt a hint of jealousy. You probably weren't from a race of blood thirsty killers.

As your mother and father grew tired, they floated gently back to the ground, and you made your way to the Earth. But not before you glanced his way. Glowing green eyes glanced into his bedroom window, and you smiled curtly before you landed on your feet and skipped inside with your mother and father gleefully chatting about dinner.

That was the first time Mark saw the good in being an alien in a while. He saw the good in flying about carefree, in feeling no shame about being what he is.

The next time he saw you, it was ringing his front doorbell.

It was a relatively quiet day. Mark went for a run, came home, took a nap, even had time to take a shit. His mother called him to get the door from where she was in the house, then he made his way down the steps.

Opening the door, he saw you. You, floating just a bit off the ground with your car keys in hand. You didn't know him. How would you feel if you knew? Knew he was a Viltrumite, knew what atrocities his "people" had committed. Of course you knew, if you were from space. Had they destroyed your home, that's why you came to Earth? Had-

"Hi! Driveway-uh. Your car..." You searched for the next words, still clearly attempting to get a grasp on English. Glancing out behind you, he looked. His mom accidentally blocked you into the driveway.

"Your car is...blocking? Blocking. My car." Despite how you struggled to get the words out, you still beamed with pride at how you were able to get the words out.

"Oh...sorry." He smiled at you, your dark hair made you look like a cherub. No longer in twist but instead manipulated into curls that framed your face and highlighted your beauty. By Earth and space features you were no doubt beautiful.

Awkward silence settled in between you two and you stopped smiling. Tilting your head you floated closer to him and before he knew it your hand was on his shoulder.

"You are sad?" His first instinct was to lie. It was to say no but... What could be the harm in being honest anyways?

"...Just a bit." Looking down at the ground he shrugged and ran his hand over the back of his neck.

"Why?" What, was your planet just filled with nosy Nancy's? But something in his heart pulled. You were from space. You didn't understand the intricacies of humans keeping to themselves yet. And maybe he just needed a listening ear.

"My dad. He did-...he died."

"You lie?"

"What?"

Just then, a woman down the street called your name, followed by speech in a different language. Anyone else would assume it was just a different language from Earth, but Mark knew better. It was of an entirely different language from an entirely different planet. Turning your head, you looked back to your house.

"Goodbye! Oh," You pointed behind you at the driveway and held up your keys. Should you even be driving on Earth?

"Car." You emphasized, shaking at your keys.

"I'll move it." He responded, finishing the thought for you. You smiled, dipped your head like a nod and flew off back to your house.

'You lie?' Your voice replayed in his head. There was no malice, no judging. You just knew. He lied. Someone knew he lied. And as uneasy as it should've made him feel, instead little waves of relief overtook him.

Before long, your English had improved by heaps and bounds. You were fully integrated into human society it seemed, except for your same blunt forward communication but it did little to stop you. For someone so new to Earth, you got hang of a social life pretty easy. Once you started wearing the dark brown contacts gifted to you by your aunt (who Mark later learned had moved to Earth years earlier) and stopped fighting your parents about them every day they finally let you masquerade as a normal girl from Earth.

By your second week at school, you were all anyone talked about. Well, you and...you. More specifically the appearance of the new hero SuperNova. Who was quickly taking over as Chicago's favorite alien superhero.

'Did you see her boots?'

'I need SuperNova to drop her curl routine.'

'She's cute or whatever.'

Flooded the hallways. Unlike most gossip though you flooded his brain. He typically didn't mind gossip. His parents taught him well enough to mind the business that pays him, but you were stuck in his brain. It didn't help that you two were teamed up together so often. And it didn't help that you and Eve were superhero besties. Or that you lived next door to one another, or that your mom and his mom were fast growing friends.

You were a great friend too. You understood him, but part of him was...uncomfortable. You seemed to just know. Everything in his brain, the tight knot of fears and anxieties in his stomach, you were even able to see the weight on his heart. And it made him so uncomfortable that you were more in touch with his feelings than he was.

So, he took to avoiding having actual conversations with you. Maybe not on purpose, perhaps on purpose he isn't fully sure. He knew virtually nothing about you personally. Not your likes, dislikes, foods you avoid and music you loved. Because if he knew, you'd be in his heart too. Along with all those icky feelings that cover him like a wet blanket you would be trapped in his heart. Those types of conversations could only lead to a deeper connection. A deeper friendship and some days Mark knew himself he would need more than that. It wasn't helpful that you were always stuck in his head, he didn't need you in his heart and soul too.

But you knew. Because you always knew. And your people do not believe in hiding feelings.

"Mark?" It was night, you two were flying home after a disturbance downtown.

"Hm?"

"You are scared that if we become closer friends, your true feelings will overtake you. You do not want to let anyone in because of the inherit shame you feel for who you are from and what you are. You are scared because you cannot hide from me. We do not have to be friends if I make you uncomfortable." With such flippancy you read him. Like it didn't matter, like you didn't unravel him with the efficiency of a well-trained therapist.

He literally felt sick. His palms began to sweat under his costume, and chills ran through his entire body. His stomach grumbled and felt like he swallowed a block of ice that was just sitting in his gut. His nervous system didn't know the difference between dealing with his emotions or being held at gunpoint. You kept flying home until you noticed he stopped behind you.

You stopped and slowly floated back to him. Eyes glowing, empty of hurt or malice but there was an underlying kindness. He had rejected you. He rejected getting to know you the way everyone else had, he rejected your friendship because he was afraid. But your eyes were like a door left open. You hadn't shut that door. It was still open for him; all he had to do was open it the rest of the way.

What, did you think you were saving him? That he was helplessly drowning in his own unnecessary shame that he's refusing to deal with while battling his growing crush on you? That he needed saving? Who did you think you were?

"You are fighting yourself. I bear no intention of 'bettering' you. I am saying what I have observed."

...Fuck, could you just get out of his head for two seconds so he could think? You totally didn't just provide him clarity. Definitely not. So why was he flying in the air completely stiff without saying a word?

"I'm hungry. I'm going to go home and eat. We do not have to be friends Mark. The choice is yours. If you are not comfortable with your feelings, then it must be frustrating for someone to try and help you understand before you are ready." You said, patting him lightly on the shoulder before flying away.

Leaving him alone to float over the city while he tried to shove his stupid feelings back down his throat. He wanted to throw them up. To scream out his frustrations and fears and regrets, and how he thinks you're really nice and smart and fun. But he couldn't. And he still couldn't stop thinking about you either.

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How he found himself at your bedroom window he doesn't know. He was in bed one moment, sneaking a glass of wine the next, then floating outside your window watching you slide open the glass and sit on the roof.

Then he was sitting next you on the roof. You were in pajamas, a matching bonnet corresponded with your fluffy robe and was the same color as your pajamas and bed slippers. He sat with you, knees pulled to his chest. The wind ghosted over his exposed feet. Somehow, he felt as if his heart was about to be as naked as his feet considering he didn't put on socks before he flew out of his window like a man possessed.

When would Mark Grayson ever hide from a girl he liked? Not that he only saw you as that. But here you were, kind and accepting. And he was fighting that and holding some fucked up resentment for you in his heart just a bit because he couldn't open up to someone. Not again.

Two aliens sat on the roof of a suburban home on Earth, looking up at the void of space. You were probably looking towards your home planet. Mark was looking for the courage to be honest. Because this wasn't just about you. Whether he wanted to admit it or not, he needed to open up to someone. Holding everything in was raising his blood pressure.

You didn't push him to speak. You were just happy he was there, you would've been happy without him. Why did it ease him just a bit to know that you could go on without him? Why was it so nice to not feel like someone is leaning on you with everything they have? More silence until Mark found the courage in one shiny star.

"My dad was actually on Earth in order to conquer it for the Viltrum empire. My entire life I thought Viltrumites were good. But the more I learn, the more I hear about the crimes. The planets they've fucked up, the lives they've destroyed. My dad never even cared about my mom. Since he left it's been up to me to defend Earth. I'm trying to balance everything, and I'm all Earth has left against Viltrum. He destroyed Chicago using my face, and he murdered the Guardians of the Globe, he lied for 20+ years to the entire planet, he tried to get me to join him and I'm just scared that Earth will see me as an extension of him but I'm human and I'm not like him at all I promise, Earth is my home and I just want to keep people safe and I'm not like the other Viltrumites-"

Soft hands covered his. While he talked, he began to spiral and didn't even realize how quickly he was drowning in his own thoughts. Didn't even realize that he was rambling so fast that he hadn't been speaking in sentences but just one long chain of thoughts. You interrupted the long rambling and saved him from sinking down into a dark place in his mind.

"I know."

"What?"

"My planet is not on your peoples list of planets to conquer. It is not possible Mark. We are not scared of Viltrum, we have never hidden or cowered before Viltrum. Our people are long standing enemies by Viltrum's choosing. You do not have to worry about me judging you for what you are. You do not have to explain you are different. I know you are different. If it will ease you, you can continue. But I want to know Mark. Not who you are not."

You did it again. You just swept him clean off his feet also basically just told him Viltrumites weren't shit to you. As if they were so insignificant to your people that Mark being one didn't even matter. Then again there always was a bigger fish.

"How come you aren't ashamed?" It was a genuine question. Mark carries the shame of being a Viltrumite every day that he prefers to keep it to himself. Leaning back on your arms you let out a chuckle and Mark buried his face in his arms that still rested on his knees.

"I have nothing to feel shame for. No matter my race, no matter how people view my species, I am me. I can't change that. I am who I am, I came from where I come from. I know me. And there is beauty in what I am."

A man and woman walked past kissing and giggling while a little girl hopped in front of them playing imaginary hopscotch, and a dog yipped excitedly between them.

You peered over the edge and motioned for Mark to come with you. Together two aliens watched three humans, and a dog partake in what to them was a small unimportant moment, but that little girl may remember this until she dies. In a thousand years would Mark even remember this conversation?

"Humans have such beautiful but short lives. And to them it isn't short, but to us it is. But we are all the same. I like TV, humans like TV. I like living, they like living. I make the most of my life, they make the most of theirs. Do they have time to spend worrying about what those before them of done? Or do they instead live for each day, focusing on what they can do with themselves now? Or do they focus on what they can do with their future knowing they cannot change the past?" Who told you to be so smart.

"A lot of us worry about the past."

"And if that is how you chose to live your lives then that is beautiful! But you do not have to let what other Viltrumites have done define you. You cannot change the past. But you can take steps to better your future. You can take steps to better your people. Or instead, better yourself but you are Mark. You are an...," You search for the word, eyes glancing up to the sky while you searched your brain

"individual! You are an individual and can make whatever choice you want. You can be the Viltrumite who changes things, or you can just be you. But you will be Mark for the next thousands of years you will be living. You do not want to carry shame for something you cannot change." It was like you just flipped on a light switch in his brain. Mark was ashamed over something he could not change. It would take time to go away but still. It can go away. That ugly feeling in his heart was finally able to go away and stop haunting him.

You pulled a blanket out from your bedroom window and tossed it over the two of you after a brush of wind ghosted you two. His feet no longer cold, and you covered his heart and eased his mind like the blanket.

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Having an alien girlfriend was a bit difficult. Mark has been attempting to adjust being open about his feelings, while he taught you the value of allowing him and others the luxury of not needing to talk through every feeling that comes through their heads.

After a few months though, something switched. And while Mark Grayson was flawed, he did know how to be a good boyfriend. But you had made things so easy by making it very clear how you felt at all times.

He knew when you were happy, when you were sad, angry, hungry, horny. You usually just told him. But today you flew into Guardians HQ with a proverbial cloud hovering over you and plopped down beside him with an uncharacteristic scowl. Your eyes were glowing so bright from whatever ailed you that it was like a spotlight beaming from your head, and for the life of him he couldn't figure out what was wrong.

Where you hungry? Tired? A headache? Were you perhaps coming down with something? Could you even get sick? Could he even get sick?

When five minutes passed without you even uttering a word to him, instead just scrolling on your phone and quickly sliding past certain post that seemed to increase your foul mood he realized it was probably best to ask.

"Baby?"

"Hm."

Ouch. Had you ever once scowled at him so hard? You've growled at him before; you've even bit him once on your cycle (or your version of it) but you've never made such a face at him. His pride was happy it was just the two of you in HQ after you both returned from separate missions.

You turned away from him on the couch you were seated on and hugged your knees closer to your chest.

"Are you mad at me?" Slowly he put a hand on your balled up form only for it to be shrugged off. You were so pissed you didn't even want him touching you.

More silence. He heard you shuffle then you straightened out and floated off of the couch. His eyes followed you upwards towards the sky. Hands on your hips, your eyes glowing down at him with tears brimming in your eyes.

"Why did you not tell me you wanted to break up?"

"...I don't want to break up!" The moment it sunk in Mark was floating in the air infront of you. You refused to meet his gaze, arms crossed and turning away from him. You went backwards in an attempt to create distance and Mark found himself floating forwards in an attempt to lessen the distance between you two.

"What's going on? Baby?" His nervous system couldn't tell the difference between you saying that and being shot. The air felt cold and heavy and the nerves in his stomach made him have to shit. You were still refusing to look at him as his hands searched for you while you dodged.

"You do not care about me. You do not care about us."

"Of course I care about you. Of course I care about us!"

"You have a very amusing way of showing it." You shoved him back, as if you just noticed how close he had gotten to you despite your avoidance. A streak of light remained as you flew out of one of the open windows. Dammit, why did they always leave windows open for their flying heroes? Although it was helpful Mark, didn't need it when his girlfriend was talking about breaking up with him and using those open windows to escape him.

By the time he flew out of the window to see if he could convince you to talk about this, you were long gone. The telltale streak of color the remains when you fly was even gone from the sky.

By the time he got home, and talked to his mom it was well past dinner time. Usually, you'd be heading home to eat with your family like you always do on a weeknight. Or you'd be flying home together like you often do late at night because that's when evil seems to emerge. Instead, there was no you.

You weren't cuddled beside him; you weren't conversing with him about the first season of Seance Dog that he was trying not to spoil for you, you two weren't holding hands in a comfortable silence, you weren't there for him to playfully tease or for him to excitedly ramble at.

Once again, he found himself at your window. Well actually your front door. Your window was locked, curtains drawn. A message, telling him to piss off, a saying you enjoyed since you learned it. He thinks your love of swearing is adorable, no matter how many times you say 'motherfucker' in a day. But he couldn't just let you think he didn't care. If he didn't care, he'd be at home fast asleep.

He settled for the old fashioned way. He rang your doorbell and waited with baited breath for someone to open the door. Instead, your mother opened the door and stood towering over Mark. Her eyes glowed nowhere near as intense as yours did hours ago. The glowing eyeballs raked him over, as distaste settled over her features.

"Goodnight, I'm sorry to bother you so late but is-"

"My child does not cry easily."

"Uh, excuse me?"

"My child, was the top warrior in her school. She is ranked across the planet for her skills, she could've become the next leader of our entire planet. She is smart. She is kind, she makes good choices. Most of all she is strong. We left our home planet, she had to start the journey to living amongst humans against her will. Not once did she break. She does not cry easily."

Silence as her eyes began to glow a more intense color.

"You made my child cry." Then the door shut. But for a moment, he saw you. Laying on the couch, your father patted your hooded head. Covered in Mark's hoodie that he gifted you and you hugged yourself close.

He stood there on your porch; through the door he heard your parents comforting you in your own language and he recognized the few words you taught him.

'Mama, what do I do?'

Fuck, what did he even do?

He never realized how much he would miss your honesty. Mark knew it was something he loved about you, but sometimes it could be a bit difficult. You were always in his head. You just always knew and after months of dating, he was still a bit freaked out. You knew him better than he knew himself.

After a year-

The porch was dark, Mark had been in the dark all day about what had you so enraged with him. But finally the light turned on in his brain and he never felt so stupid. A wind blew over him, like the truth that revealed itself to him.

Today had been a year since you two had gotten together. Lifting off, he made his way to his own roof and planted his bottom firmly on the spot he so often sat on. And he thought back over the year.

You helped him sort himself out for a year. You planned your six month anniversary. You planned his birthday party. You reminded him when Valentine's Day was approaching. You helped him plan a birthday party for his mother. You made him dinner the best you could when you got the hang of Earth cooking. You saved him from countless battles, you encouraged him to keep his head up. Even after a devastating loss, you encouraged him to keep his head up. He couldn't remember one day.

You even told him it would be nice if he planned something for once. And he couldn't remember one day.

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His mom tore him a new one, but it was nothing compared to you. You became more like an Earth girl with each passing day, evident by how you'd been giving him the cold shoulder for four days now. Even gossip articles picked up on it.

'Invincible and SuperNova split?'

'SuperNova snubs Invincible after battle!'

Instagram was clowning him. Evident by the comments William was reading out loud to him as they sat in the car with Amber and Eve during lunch. Also, the meme going around of him edited as Art the Clown. They dubbed him 'Invinciclown"

"Oh man this ones funny, 'bro fumbled a baddie', 'SUPERNOVA ONE CHANCE PLEASE!!!', 'Omniman knocked the game out bro', 'The fumble needs to be studied'. Lesbians have also never been happier since you're out of the picture."

"Honestly the entire LGBT community has been praying for your breakup." Amber chimed from the back, scrolling through edits on her phone.

"Look at this."

"NO WAY SOMEONE MADE A BREAKUP EDIT!" Eve yelled, hands dramatically on her head. The internet decided it was over already.

"We aren't broken up. I'm not out of any picture." Mark sulked, head pressed against the glass.

"What's it like being emo and delusional?" Eve snickered, leaning back.

"That's not hot Mark." William added, making dramatic gestures with his hands.

"You're not Paris Hilton. And we aren't broken up. She's mad at me."

"Okay but why is she mad at you? She's been ducking you for almost a week now. She doesn't even duck fades and she's avoiding you." Always sympathetic Eve brought reason back to the car.

"...I forgot our one year anniversary."

....

"The fumble really does need to be studied."

"One year...yeah man she needs to break up with you, that's ghetto as hell."

"I tried saying sorry, but she doesn't want to talk to me! She fought a Kaiju and Doc Seismic on her own before she chose to speak to me. She almost got eaten and literally chose to handle that before talking to me."

"Well, she's tired of spelling everything out for you. What have you actually planned for her that's important? Answer quickly." Amber responded. When was her foot not on Mark's neck?

He couldn't even answer slowly because you typically spell everything out for him.

"Okay but what do I do?"

"Give up?" Eve suggested.

"Accept defeat?" William offered.

"Die because of how bad you dropped the bag?" Amber added her advice.

"Guys I love this girl; can we be serious?" The words came from the depths of his heart. Then silence filled the car again.

"YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH HER?"

He was in love with you. He was in love with you and was sitting in a car with his friends while you, the woman he loves, was somewhere. You weren't with him at lunch because he pissed you off so bad you didn't even want to try and communicate.

"I gotta go."

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"Why are you in my bedroom?" You asked, rolling over in your bed and eyeing the man sitting on your bed.

"You haven't been talking to me." Mark figured out pretty quickly where you were when you didn't return back to school. He spent the rest of lunch looking all over the city for you, saw you didn't show up to your trigonometry class and figured you just blew off the rest of the school day. So, he did the only thing his crazy and stupid heart could think of. Because Mark is crazy over you. Even though it took disgustingly long for him to lock in and act like it.

You pulled your covers back up to your chest and rolled back onto your side.

"I do not need to talk to you. You are my ex boyfriend. I do not need to be friends with my ex boyfriend." Did you just stab him and twist the knife? But he had to push on. Because this was not about him. This wasn't about making him feel better, it was time Mark showed you how much he cared.

It was time to be brave, but this was scarier than any battle he'd ever been in.

"...I'm sorry I forgot our anniversary."

"I am sorry that you think that means anything to me four days later."

Okay you were not having it with him.

"You don't want to be with me anymore?"

You tossed the blanket over and sat up. You looked at him and the back of his brain wondered how long you'd been home. You were in a fitted tank top, pajama pants, makeup gone, contacts removed, and your hair gently placed under your bonnet.

"I want to be with someone who cares for me. You do not want to be with me. You have shown me that you do not care for me the way I care for you. I have my struggles. I have my burdens. I have carried your burdens and mine for the past year. I do not put these on you. I ask that you take care of me the way I attempt to take care of you. I asked one thing of you Mark Grayson. You did not do the one thing I asked of you, Mark Grayson." Then you flopped back down on the sheets as if holding eye contact with him was killing you. He cracked, eyes watering and voice cracking.

"I'm sorry. I am sorry baby, I am. I know you needed someone, and I am that someone for you. I didn't mean to let you down. I was so used to you knowing everything already that I forgot that everyone needs someone. And I need you, I can't live without you." He drew closer to you. Mark was absolutely begging. Because you taught him better than to hide his feelings and hiding them right now would only make things worse.

"Things shouldn't come to this extreme for me to realize that and I'm sorry. I...I love you." And with that you shot straight up in the bed. You were staring at him with curious eyes.

"You...love me?"

Mark swallowed thickly, and he blinked away tears. He took his hands in yours, ignoring the way you raised your eyebrow. You didn't yank your hands away, a good sign?

"I love you. I love you. Not just what you do for me, not just how you look. I love you." He breathed. Your eyes filled with tears, and Mark brung his forehead to yours. His heartbeat slowed; the world stopped spinning for a moment. Your heartbeat matched his.

"It is against my customs to forgive you. On my planet, I would be expected to leave you and never look back. You have made a grave error, you have failed to value you me the way I should’ve been all along.”

He swallowed thickly, eyes trained on his hands holding yours.

"But I am not on my planet. And you are sorry. I see your heart, you intend to improve. And I love you. So, against everything I know, I forgive you Mark." It came out in a whisper.

"You forgive me?" His voice was hoarse, from the crying and disbelief.

"I forgive you." Eyes finally met and he saw tears running down your cheeks.

"You love me?" Your lips drew closer to his and he found his knees weakening.

"I love you."

#black reader #x black reader #x reader #fem reader #multifandom account #requests open #invincible characters #invincible #i love being black #mark grayson x reader #mark grayson x black reader #mark grayson #invincible smut #invincible fluff #invincible x reader

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secriden · 4 months ago

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This line. God, this line! It has been eating me up inside for 2 days now, because let's not forget, this line isn't about love, it's about trust. And that has implications that make me want to scream.

It's a direct reference to this moment earlier in the episode:

At the start of this discussion, Style and Fadel still have a kind of playful air about their conversation:

Style: Oh? Not even me? Fadel: You're at 80% at best. I feel like you're hiding something from me in the 20%.

In this exchange, though, there's a sense that Fadel is issuing a challenge, like there's something specific which Style can do to gain Fadel's full trust. And while Style knows there are things he cannot (yet) reveal to Fadel, I think a part of him is determined to be as honest as he can be, which is why he issues a challenge of his own by asking for more specificity:

Style: What do I have to do to gain your complete trust?

Part of this question is a simultaneously inquisitive and deflective - What (and why) do you think I'm hiding (something) from you? - but there's also a moment after Style finishes speaking where he stills and goes quiet that feels... genuine, weighty. Or, as @airenyah has pointed out in her meta on Style in episode 4, the "grounded[ness]" in Style's demeanour is a signal that Style means what he's saying in the moment. Maybe about his own desire to be worthy of Fadel's trust, maybe about how he genuinely does want this relationship to be real in whatever way that matters to Fadel.

I think Fadel sensed that too, because the moment looses all the lightheartedness it had before. Fadel pauses, and then gets a look on his face that just... breaks my heart. There's a sombreness there, like he knows he's going to have to say something that makes him sad. Fadel looks away, and then down, before he seems to steel himself and says:

Fadel: It'll never happen. No matter how much you love someone, I just don't believe that you can completely lay yourself bare in front of them.

Fadel says this like it's fact. Like what he's expressing is something foundational and true and irrefutable. It's not even about his doubt in Style's honesty, because this statement has no qualifiers or conditions put on it to connect it to Style. Rather this is what Fadel fundamentally believes about relationships and trust: he finds the very concept of being fully known and still accepted an impossibility.

Sure, maybe this is because of the falling out (or betrayal or disappearance) associated with the former lover; but I also think it might be because Fadel is acutely aware not only that he's hiding a rather big and dark secret (not to mince words, but: actual literal premeditated murder), but also about what it implies about Fadel. Because being able to kill another human, coldly and clinically and without remorse, takes a certain type of person. Because, yes, Fadel has lived through an absolutely harrowing and traumatising event (his parents' murder), but it's also undeniable that it changed him. Because there's something about Fadel that twisted dark and which he never quite got back. There's an anger, a hurt that colours every moment of his life; that enables him to look a man in the eyes, smile politely, and pull a trigger.

And at this point in their relationship, Fadel's understanding of Style is that he's... well, kind of innocent. Especially in comparison to Fadel and Bison, and even Kant.

Style, who easily reveals facts about his life which Fadel already knows (winning a car tuning competition), making Fadel doubt his own instincts about Style hiding secrets. Style, who also reveals the things Fadel doesn't know, like the tender and secret pain of a mother lost to cancer (which, now that I think about it, Fadel may also know) and his worries about a father who "lost his bearings for a bit" (which he probably doesn't). Style, who tries to comfort Fadel in his own loss by offering a safe space and a sympathetic ear.

Style, who doesn't just see Fadel for his tragedy, but is asking to be given the chance to accept all of Fadel as a person. Style, who not only wants but has the capacity, to be the only person Fadel needs to rely on. Style who, despite the sea of differences between them, understands Fadel on a level that is so very foundational.

I'm going to slightly segue and mention something that may not resonate with everyone, but really hit me in the gut this episode: because I lost my father when I was 16 after he battled cancer for 2 painful years. And this revelation about Style has totally shifted and coloured everything Style has done in a new light for me. Because not only does this totally explain Style's sometimes almost stubbornly childish demeanour (it's common in adults who've had to 'grow up' too early), but also why Style shows seemingly random flashes of insight and maturity when they are most crucial. Notably, Style has this almost instinctive sense of when he needs to back off a sore point with Fadel that I couldn't quite put my finger on until this episode.

I've seen a few jokes about Style's awkward subject change, but I've actually got a friend who I hold very dear to my heart who was one of the only people to give me a sense of normalcy and comfort when my dad was on his last few days and then at his funeral. And part of that was the instinctive way she would know when I needed to just. Not be a grieving daughter for a few minutes. To get a small respite from the overwhelming hopelessness and sense of impending loss. To get a moment to breathe and gather my strength, because knowing I was never going to see my dad again, or hear his voice, or hold his hand was tearing me apart back then. Sometimes she'd talk to me about college drama, sometimes she'd introduce a new kpop video to me, sometimes she'd just ask me what I wanted to eat and take me to go have a meal with her. And sometimes there really just isn't anything else to say other than "I'm sorry." Nothing you say - nothing you can say - is going to ever, ever make this grief go away, and in most cases, it was better when people (especially those who couldn't really understand) didn't try.

And I think if you look at Fadel very closely, there's a moment of genuine surprise (Fadel wasn't expecting the subject change at all) and then... something that looks like fondness mixed with exhausted relief. Because I don't think Fadel was ready to talk about his parents yet. This was honesty he wasn't ready to give Style, mostly prompted because Style himself had willingly been so vulnerable that a part of Fadel wanted to reciprocate. But further down that path lies not only his darkest memories, but also the connection to the part of his life he is not willing to share with Style yet. So this subject change is a relief, it's a blessing, but it's also Style knowing when he shouldn't push any further with Fadel's fragile heart.

Which brings me back to how well the episode's theme of trust (both deserved and undeserved) was woven in this episode. This is true on multiple levels and characters but I'm not even going to attempt to touch Kant in this post because... Lord, that is beyond me at the moment. Someone else needs to do that, pretty please, so I can reblog it and scream.

It starts, somewhat unexpectedly, with Fadel asking for entrance into the intimate spaces of Style's life.

So, this episode was not about Fadel's fear of his own feelings, desires, or even affection for Style - that appears to be fully addressed in episode 4. I think that's why we see Fadel be so physically affectionate and indulgent of Style in this episode. He's come to terms with his lust for Style's body (hence his comfort in initiating sex), he's accepted Style as his boyfriend and so can enjoy Style's playful teasing (still reluctantly, but Fadel is still an introvert even if he's mostly enjoying Style's rambunctious nature), and give into Style's (and Bison's and Kant's) cajoling with relatively little fuss.

He's even comfortable toying with the edges of revealing his darker and more sinister side by reminding Style implicitly about how violent Fadel has the potential to be. Recall that Fadel knows Style knows some of his capacity for violence; he just doesn't know how very thoroughly Style is aware of the full scale of this truth. It does help that Style evidences no actual fear and, in fact, looks positively euphoric. Like, buddy, pal, dearest one... please control yourself.

And yet something very, very telling is the way the show makes it a point to depict Fadel very deliberately getting drunk during the double date. Even before the date has started, Fadel looks to be about half a beer in and we see him constantly drinking, drinking, drinking during the whole date. From the conversation about trust he has with Style while Kant and Bison are being off key and adorable about it, to after Kant leaves and Bison gets worried. And we've seen Fadel cope with emotional and mental distress with alcohol before, so we know that Fadel is internally fighting some kind of very intense battle even as he is also very clearly enjoying moments with Style on this date (most notably when they're dancing by the bowling lanes and when Style asks him to go home with him).

So here's my take: rather than being about love, this is about Fadel fighting to hold onto his own philosophy on relationships and trust. Because as much as I do believe Fadel believes he's telling the truth when he tells Style that 100% trust is "impossible", I think it's clear that's not what he wants.

What he wants is to finish this last job so that the only thing he can't be honest about with Style will finally stop being a factor in his life. What he wants is to fully and completely reciprocate the openness Style seems to be giving Fadel. What he wants is to switch off his brain and let his heart lead for once, to stop fighting a battle he has no desire to win anymore, only he can't. Trust (not love) is Fadel's final frontier, and one which he can't quite give up in spite of himself.

Which is why I think Fadel intentionally gets himself drunk here. Because he wants to let his guard down around Style. He wants to open himself fully, he wants to "lay himself bare" for Style, he wants Style to know the full truth and accept him anyway - and he gets so close, but can't quite get there - because he doesn't know that Style already has.

When Style says this, Fadel thinks it's empty words, not knowing that Style has long passed the bar Fadel thinks is insurmountable. And just like Style was able to offer safety and reassurance to the vulnerability Fadel was showing in episode 4, Style instinctively gets to the core of Fadel's darkest fears again:

Style: One day, I'll be your 100%.

This isn't (just) a promise that Style will wear Fadel's stubbornness down, or that Style will be worthy of Fadel's 100% (which, already, has me in tears, ngl). Beyond that, this is Style promising Fadel isn't ruined for this; that it isn't too late, that whatever hurts and wounds Fadel has can be made whole again. That the kind of honest and all-encompassing and unconditional trust which Fadel says is impossible can, in fact, be his. That Fadel still has the capacity to trust and be trusted the way he so desperately, painfully longs for.

I know a lot of people have said Style in this episode is writing cheques he has no ability to honour, but I think it's more layered than that. Because in a very significant and profound way, Style is wholly deserving of Fadel's trust. Because in all the ways that Fadel has ever known he should want, Style actually IS worthy of his trust. Style knows the truth Fadel is hiding, knows what this man is capable of, knows the danger of being in his arms, knows the likely nonexistent future Fadel has to offer him -- and wants him anyway. Style is a man who would stare into Fadel’s darkness and reach out first. Strip away the complication of Kant being blackmailed and dragging Style into his mission, and Style is literally perfect for Fadel. He is exactly what Fadel wants (and possibly has wanted for a very long time). He is, in fact, exactly what Fadel needs to ever experience anything beyond the shadow of a life he's had so far.

But oh, the cruel narrative means that Style is also, simultaneously, painfully undeserving of Fadel's trust; and this is something Style is very much aware of. I think that's why he's trying so very hard to be worthy in all the other ways he can be. Style's awareness of what Fadel is hiding enables Style to (counterintuitively) be completely honest about his feelings for and about Fadel even as he cannot reveal his motivations. So he gives Fadel as much honesty as he can: offers the vulnerability of his own pain and hurts; the comfort of his true understanding and acceptance.

And just as Fadel's vulnerability in the abandoned factory was met with Style choosing a form of physical connection that prioritised Fadel's pleasure (it's made very clear that Style is jerking Fadel off and that all his focus in that moment was on Fadel, not his own pleasure), so too is this moment met with Style very intentionally choosing to worship Fadel's body with all the tenderness and genuine emotional weight that Style wanted Fadel to have in their first time in the storeroom.

Because, crucially, this was Style giving Fadel the chance to lay himself at least physically bare. This is the closest either of them can get to full honesty with the secrets they both are keeping. It's why Style tries so very hard to show the care and adoration and genuine feelings he has for Fadel. Why he makes sure that the vulnerability of Fadel getting himself as drunk and as relaxed and as trusting as Fadel can allow himself to be is tied only to gentleness and tenderness and pleasure.

Because Style actually knows that Fadel can't (and shouldn't) trust him in the way Fadel truly wishes to.

And as much as I believe that Style genuinely means this from the bottom of his heart, the horrifying full truth is that it is Style that has the metaphorical knife hovering over Fadel's chest. He is the one with the capacity to actually give Fadel a new scar that would truly matter. He is, in fact, the only one Fadel wants to fully trust -- and this, along with Style's compromised heart, makes it so that the circumstances will doom them both.

#this episode broke me in ways i wasn't ready for because of style's backstory so fair warning there's no level of objectivity whatsoever #i'm sure much as already been said about this line and this moment and i'm sorry if i'm just repeating someone else (please let me know!)#i haven't had the time or physical OR emotional capacity to actually read any meta on episode 5 #so i apologise in advance if i screwed up anything but these are just my (somewhat disjointed and very emotionally driven) thoughts #the heart killers #the heart killers the series #fadelstyle #style sattawat #fadel #thk ep 5 #thk meta #hui talks thk #hui talks thai bl #i understand why dunk said this scene was so hard and weighty and was his favourite now #(or at least i think this was the one he means?? I vaguely remember an interview where dunk talked about them talking #before they have sex and how emotionally charged it was)#i'll have to go through my tags and see if i talked about it #but either way our boys both did such excellent jobs this episode #as they have been doing every episode but each time i really am just... newly awed by their talent and my adoration for them grows <3 #joongdunk #joong archen #dunk natachai

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