#source: the good place

[incorrectbatfam]

Alfred: No one can ever truly turn over a new leaf. Sure, Master Bruce told me he'd matured after he took control of Wayne Enterprises. But then, right on schedule, it was, "Guess what, Alfred? I'm going to be Batman."

[hello-waffles-are-good]

Tim: Steph told me that instead of being sad, I should ‘Go get it, girl’.

Tim: So I am going to go get it, girl.

Cass: Get what?

Tim: Unclear… I’ll get everything, just to be safe.

[incorrect-bridgerton-family]

Francesca: Hyacinth told me that instead of being sad, I should ‘Go get it, girl’.

Francesca: So I am going to go get it, girl.

Eloise: Get what?

Francesca: Unclear… I’ll get everything, just to be safe.

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Bucky: Wanda, what do you value about Y/N?

Wanda: They’re thoughtful. They pick flowers and bring them to me. Often they’re ones I’ve just planted, but...

Y/N: That’s how I know they’re fresh!

[sayssnape]

dumbledore: sorry it took me so long to bail you out of jail.

snape: no, it was my fault. i shouldn't have used my one phone call to play a prank on minerva.

[definitelyincorrect]

Steve: I guess we’ll do this the old-fashioned way.

Bucky: -pulls out a Molotov cocktail-

Villain: How the fuck did you make that so fast.

[harringroveera]

Billy gets it, at least he will learn to from now on

[hazbinheard]

Husk: I know you're deflecting by making jokes about how hot you are

Angel: *tearfully* It's not a joke I'm a legit snack

[bisexual-cryptid]

steve, after they fight inter dimensional monsters: we have fun don’t we?

eddie, visibly shaking: i have never been more stressed out in my entire life.

[athina-blaine]

Kabru: Marcille seemed a little suspicious earlier. You didn't tell her about us, did you?

Laios: No. Why are you so scared that someone will know we're pounding it out?

Kabru: Because you refer to lovemaking as "pounding it out".

[incorrectbatfam]

Tim: As my brother always used to say: if a cop handcuffs you to a bike rack, there's always something you can gnaw through.

Bernard: Your brother always said that?

[haystarlight]

Eda: I've only said 'I love you' to 2 people in my life

Eda: Raine Whispers

Eda: and person in a dark club that I mistook for Raine Whispers

[ouatsqincorrect]

Regina: I vote for my plan.

Snow: I vote we-

Regina: No, sorry, and no offense Snow, but the stakes here are too high to let someone with your limited intellectual capacity to weigh in.

Snow: I was going to agree with you...

Regina: Oh, great! Well, that's two votes for my plan.

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Natasha: I love you, okay?!?

Y/N: The words are nice, but the tone is scary.

[papermariosuggestion]

Nintendo: So, yeah, if this remake of The Thousand-Year Door sells well enough, then maybe we-

Intelligent Systems:

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Wylan: I know you’re deflecting by making jokes about how hot you are

Jesper, crying: It’s not a joke I’m a legit snack