#sorry I might be a bit out of it today
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lixenn · 6 months ago
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I have some questions for Dave this time hehe
What was his first meeting with Chief like?
What was his original hair color?
I wonder if he gets along with Bel?
*crawls out of trenches, bloodied and covered in mud*
"I-" *huff* "I have fought in war and it was close but! I HAVE WON! The evil snippet has not defeated me!"
So now, I can finally answer this!! I'm sorry that it took so long Ein 🫠🥺🥺please forgive my tardiness 😣
Let me satisfy your curiosity!
Original hair color
Dave's hair used to be this really mousy brown and it just wouldn't do! No! He refuses! It was boring and common and absolutly clashed with his vibe so it needed to be adressed immediately. He bleached his hair the first time when he was 14 and it turned out horrible but he was still happy with his shitty dyejob because at least it was unique!
Dave and Bel
Do they get along? Ohhh boy, honey they get along like a house on fire! Dave and Bel often team up for pranks and mischief (Levi is one of their regular victims lol). Surprisingly Chief doesn't actually mind this relationship mostly because Dave tends to curb Bel's more ... homicidal tendencies. Dave prefers leaving his victims alive (though there's no guarentee for their sanity) mostly because killing them would limit his options for pranks. So when Dave and Bel plan mischief Dave puts his foot down about murder.
First meeting
As for that question....
Have a snippet!
The world is undoubtedly cruel. Criminally unjust. Life is filled with hurdles and hardships, with unimaginable challenges and dreadful chores.
Dan has been kicked out of his own office by an overly worried Lussuria.
(Honestly, the audacity of his doctor, the inhumanity. He is seriously considering a lawsuit.)
Apparently working for ten months straight without a break is “unhealthy” and “terrible for the skin, just look at those wrinkles Dani-boy”. Which is ridiculous in his humble opinion, he doesn’t have wrinkles. His skin simply has more character, more definition, that’s all. No wrinkles here, just a well-developed background story edged into his outer shell.
Nevertheless, Dan is left with no other choice than take the day off since he doesn’t want to deal with Lussuria drugging his tea again. One time was more than enough.
Well, at least he can use this opportunity to finally get some shopping done. His sister Is going to skin him alive if he shows up empty handed to her birthday again. Finding the perfect jewellery set to make up for his blunder took him some time but now he can at least cross that off his list.
He is slandering down the empty streets, enjoying the sunshine on his face, when his peaceful musings are interrupted by a body landing right in his path.
What?
Dan must have committed war crimes in his past life, it’s the only explanation. His former self probably kicked puppies for fun and slaughtered babies in their sleep because he can’t even take a stroll in the city without someone throwing bodies at his feet.
Puzzled and slightly annoyed Dan takes a closer look at the young man sprawled in front of him.
The first thing that catches his eye is the absolutely garish shade of neon green decorating the top of his head. Whoever did that dye job needs to be fired. His hair isn't the only thing that needed fixing though. He’s covered in bruises and dirt, blood is dripping from his nose and - Dan squints - is that a tooth on the pavement? Yes, it is. … Gross. Hopefully the guy knows a good a dentist.
The sound of footsteps alerts him to the arrival of even more people. Dan inspects the newcomers in irritation. There are three of them, all clad in ill-fitted suits, hair slicked back and fake gold rings on their fingers, making them look like stereotypical comic mafia goons brought to life. It would have been funny and something to laugh over with Squalo over coffee if said goons hadn’t interrupted his quiet afternoon with their petty disputes.
What a drag.
“You have five seconds.”
“Hah?” Goon #1 sneers at him, somehow turning even uglier in the process. “What do ya want, shrimp? Don’t ya see we’re a little busy here.”
Only sheer willpower prevents Dan from inspecting his nails in disinterest. Instead, he crooks an eyebrow, giving the idiotic trio his best deadpan fish stare.
“Three seconds.”
Goon #2 spots the Varia emblem on his hoodie and the Cloud clocks the moment he recognises what it stands for. He shakily points at Dan’s chest. “U-uhm… boss?”
“What?” Goon #1 snaps, but his gaze follows his friend’s finger and all colour leaves his face. “V-v-varia?”
Dan puts his hands in his hoodie pocket and smiles. “You rang?”
The way they freeze like a deer in the headlights. How they start quaking in their knock off designer shoes when realisations dawns upon them. The fear in their eyes.
Ah… making grown men piss their pants with a single look never gets old.
“By the way,” Dan drops his smile, his voice turning ice cold. “Your time is up. Better start running, boys.”
One would think that the Vendice are on their heels with how fast they scrammed.
Now, with that sorted.
Dan looks back the stranger who’s still lazing on the street. “You okay?”
“U-uhm yes…” he stutters with wide eyes that are filled with something uncomfortably close to awe. “Thank you so much.”
Feeling slightly awkward now, Dan avoids his shining gaze. “Don't mention it.”
“But-”
“Seriously don’t,” Dan interrupts him, combing a hand through his hair. He wishes this interaction was over already. He’s no good with shows of gratitude. “You should let a doctor check you over.” That should be enough polite concern, right? “I will be on my way then.”
Dan tries to speedwalk away to avoid further socialising but is hindered by a surprisingly strong grip on his hoodie.
Only his ingrained manners (thanks Mom) prevent him from breaking a hand and escaping anyways, which is probably for the best, the poor guy has enough injuries, no need to add broken bones to the list.
Dan turns around and sighs. “What is it?”
The young man gives him a solid try at puppy eyes. “What’s your name? I’m Dave by the way! You can’t just rescue me like a knight in shining armour and then disappear off into the sunset. That’s not fair at all.” He adds a pout to his pleading expression, which – in Dan’s humble opinion – just makes him look even more pathetic.
“Have you suffered head trauma recently?”
Dave cocks his head, confused. “I mean, one of them kicked my face for a bit but that was nothing, I’m good! They mostly focused on my upper body and limbs.” He lets go of Dan’s hoodie and lifts his shirt up to point at his battered torso in demonstration. “See?”
“Then, why are you spouting nonsense?” Dan takes a step back after he is freed from Dave’s clutches. “Run along and try to avoid getting beat up by shady men in the future.”
The puppy eyes start to fill with fake tears. “But they keep on finding me.”
Dan is suddenly overcome with a desperate need for coffee.
“And that’s my problem, how exactly?”
The responding grin sends shivers down his spine. It reminds him of Bel’s smug smile after he caught another one of his employees in his wire traps.
“Well, all your hard work would go to waste if they came back, wouldn’t it? So, how about you help a buddy out?” Dave winks and it would have been charming if his face wasn’t covered in dried blood. “You can start with your name and we will go from there.”
Dan barely lifted a finger, is this guy on crack? In fact… Is he trying to con him? This feels like a con.
Why did I even bother leaving my room today?
“Look, Dave,” he begins trying to salvage the situation, “if I tell you that Varia Housekeeping is always looking for new members, will you go away and let me enjoy the rest of my day off in peace?”
The other man’s jaw drops like Dan got on his knees and proposed instead of throwing in a job offer as distraction tactic.
Dan takes his surprise as an opportunity to exit the premises once again. This time he isn’t stopped physically but a broken “W-wait” still gives him pause and he reluctantly glimpses back. Dave has dropped his cocky façade leaving behind only shattered pieces and a tiny fragment of hope.
“Please. Tell me your name?”
His voice sounds fragile compared his confident tone before.
Dan has always been a sucker for the broken ones, hasn’t he?
Fuck it, in for a penny, in for a pound.
“You can call me Chief.”
---
Hope you liked the little sneak peak into Dave's mysterious past 😊! Honestly the delay was mostly because that meeting was fighting me with tooth and nail but I managed to get it done!
I feel like I wanted to add something else but I forgot because goldfish brain lol
Anyways keep being awesome like the legend you are Ein!! Hopefully I could brighten your dim days in study hell 💕✨😊
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bigfatbreak · 7 months ago
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THEY CAN TAKE HER IN FOR SURGERY!! AAAAAA
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moonpaw · 1 year ago
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trying to design a new main pmd2 team as i sadly retire team vulpes
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xxplastic-cubexx · 2 months ago
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Understandably So no one mentions charles when talking about the Logan movie and again Understandably So This Aint Bout Him however i do confess that as someone who had never seen Logan until like. a month ago when i was binging all the movies and without knowing a single thing about it aside from laura i cant lie i was in fact jumpscared by him being there. especially for at least like 3/4s of the movie
#xmen#logan movie#snap chats#i be ramblin today hello ...#it was a pleasant jumpscare. yk until he died. after realizing he committed atrocities by accident 😭😭💀 OLD MAN NOOO#but no please LIKE I READ THE DESCRIPTION WHEN GOING TO WATCH RIGHT#AND I WAS JUST THINKING 'oh he'll probably be here for like twenty minutes. wdym he's here for way longer than that'#i THINK years ago i REMEMBER seeing a screenshot of the hotel bit with laura and charles but again that was years ago#and i might be tricking myself maybe its a false memory jealvvelka either way i just know they were cute :(#point is he was here for. i cant even say So Little cause again He Was Here For An Hour And Thirty Minutes Out Of Two Hours#and lets be clear 'snap has your brain molded that much you know exactly how much screen time charles gets in the movies'#girl no not yet i only know exactly when he punches his clock cause i had to keep restarting the movie cause it kept pausing vjAELKAJE#and it just so happened to struggle literally like. ten minutes after he dies- like when logan was dealing with x24 THAT part#so rude for that.. anyway I Repeat i miss charles and laura bein cute :(#it wasnt a lot but it was just sweet.. i always like how charles always got that Professor in his soul with these movies#like in dofp when logan's losing it after. getting future ptsd jvALKVLAJ??K charles is there to ground him#despite being. Like That vjeaLKj like sir please ily. i will accept the Youre On Acid answer youre trying your best#and then with THIS movie evidently charles is having. the worst time upstairs#but he's still super sweet with laura like oh stop you grandpa im gonna throw up#and to STRESS. they were EVIL about that wholesome dinner bit like :((( oh to see the fam happy and safe again :(((#like im throwing up frankly. people were right this movie IS sad i underestimated their assessment 😭#to lighten the mood in my heart. charles really do be an old man in this movie hes such a menace to logan JELKAK#god. Most Normal X-Men Movie Watcher Focuses On Professor X During The Movie About Logan VEJLKJA#ok im done. sorry i just keep replayin that bit in my head where theyre in the car and logans just 'Did You Take Your Meds SHOW'#like pelase. jaeRLKEaj ok im gonna try drawing i looked at my wall long enough and i think i can draw something
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sciderman · 6 months ago
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(Idk if someone asked this already) since we’re on the topic of gender
sci what is gender to you and how do you see it in you and how you express it in your art?? (Just a young queer artist who wants some light shined upon them 🥺)
i 'unno ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
#gender is soup#sci speaks#i'm so sorry i know you might hope for something profound but... i think when i'm put on the spot like this i can't say anything really#i think whatever i am is definitely pervasive in everything i write#but like.. gender means something different to wade than it does for peter.#just like it'll be different for everybody. we make different associations based on our experiences and our trauma.#like.. wade associates femininity with love. because of his mother. associates masculinity with violence. because of his father.#peter associates masculinity with responsibility. because of uncle ben. associates femininity with confidence. because of aunt may.#i think there's all kinds of reasons why we choose to present the way we do. and what gender means to us.#just like we'll associate a colour with something. or a smell with a memory. it's complicated.#i don't think i'm some kind of expert on gender things but... i just find it interesting to explore. the psychology of it.#i don't think it's supernatural. it doesn't come from nowhere. but it should be a playground.#i don't think anyone in this world should be restricted to a certain role to play. i want to try all the roles and see how it fits.#see how well i can play them.#maybe because i haven't found one that quite fits. so i want the opportunity to try whatever i can. see what feels right.#i think it would be fun to be a wife. i think it would be fun to be a husband. i think it would be fun to be a firefighter. i think it wo#shrugs. different outfits for every day. different roles to play.#today i'd like to try...#i think it's like kids learning how to be adults by playing pretend. by playing roles.#i'm learning more about myself and other people and fitting into the world by trying on different roles.#kids playing house. you be the mom. i'll be the dad. yadda yadda.#i still feel like a bit of a kid who hasn't figured out how to be an adult yet. so i'm still trying out roles to see what fits.
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moeblob · 7 months ago
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Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.
Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.
#my characters#waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit#deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee#and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name#deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c#man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while#he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair#ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so#its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons#but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me#and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not#fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew#and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable#while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts#and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed#so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en#so you know maybe its that idk#and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now#and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it#and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad#that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal#and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it#the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer#anyway story time in the tags again#im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note#its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him#he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times#and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea#and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you
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melloneah · 3 days ago
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rant in tags tw death sorry
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valewritessss · 1 month ago
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Any tips to making a cold go away sooner?
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gayalanwake · 3 months ago
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sorry if I become extra annoying im kinda tweaking over being on my own for the first time sooooo I might let myself become extra indulgent 💔💔💔
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#‘aren’t u already super indulgent’ you’d be surprised#everything will be tagged either fanfic bullshit or gayalanwoke if you wanna block 😭#sorry i kinda maybe sorta will be having a moment. for a while.#idk if I can call myself disabled. but like yall know I have diagnosed cptsd and suspected-autism#sooooooo#taking care of myself is. not easy. At all#I can hardly manage with my parents#and now . idk. basically my routine for the past 20 years is being disrupted and im not handling it well#not only that. just.#again like I said taking care of myself in general is really hard#AND I have . college now.#lord 😭#I’ve always been a straight a student in high school and community college right#four months after my cptsd developed? I dropped out of community college 🫠#bc I literally couldn’t handle it#that was last February#now im at a . four year school#so#im tweaking#like actually this time#and since hyperfixations are All Consuming . they are as helpful as they are debilitating yk#so like yes this show/the fic might contribute to education problems. buttttt it’ll also stop me from crashing out!!!!!#so . yeah. yall might be hearing a bit more from me 😵‍💫#or#I’ll become extremely self conscious and never follow through#sorry#this is so funny I’m freaking out that yall might be angry im posting abt stuff that makes me happy LMFAOAOO#THIS IS LITERALLY ALL IN MY HEAD LMAOOOO#yall: hey gayalanwake! what’s up? cool binder. hey gayalanwake! wanna come over to my house today? :D#me: they alllll hated me 🐺
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space-writes · 3 months ago
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made the mistake of reading the comments on a Post and had to block a bunch of people going 'actually badwrong incest fic is the worst problem facing society today' so now im compelled to say
read the fuck your brother and steal his body fic, it's one of the best things i've written
(technically it's fanfiction but all you need to know is 'drow' and you're pretty much good)
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askthewvba · 1 year ago
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Vonnie, if you like watching boxing and beat-ups so much, why don't Y̶O̶U̶ ̶J̶U̶S̶T̶ ̶M̶A̶R̶R̶Y̶ ̶I̶T̶ try it out yourself to get that thrill more often?
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Vonnie has in fact been practicing! She got herself a very reluctant teacher and has already picked out a name for her inevitable launch into boxing as a career! Now she just needs is a fancy costume that dubiously skirts the apparel guidelines!
She's extremely new to it however. She gets coached on form and such from Little Mac, but she only ever boxes the solid holograms provided by the WVBA's training center. She’s not even defeated Joe’s holo yet! She’s determined though.
She’s got the skills! She’s got the power! You’ll never catch her, she is like—!!! … Big Ben?
No one is quite sure what to think of this new development, however one person can think of a few choice words he'd like to have with a certain impulsive little sister of his! YVONNE—
As an aside, we believe Doc is exaggeratedly sniffling and wiping tears from his eyes that the student has become the teacher, much to a shy Little Mac’s embarrassment.
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🌟It’s nice to see you all again!🌟
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e77y · 2 months ago
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Augehhrhghfg homework. Big explosion
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ceiling-karasu · 4 months ago
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A bit more of world building with a possible OC, White-Naped Crane focused.
I know that I mentioned in a previous world-building post that the White-Naped Cranes were part of a ruling priest class, in the old Joseon style species caste system, that was overthrown generations ago in my AUs.
The caste system is based around the idea of Confucianism, with the ideas of ritual performance and piety towards a leader. This is combined slightly with Shamanistic and Hindu values that somewhat did influence the traditional Korean values, that hold that an authority figure should make rules and laws for the good of the family/community, all turned into a religion that held the caste system and separation of species as holy.
Although, whether the cranes fully worship this idea, or just want to reclaim the power they used to have, is a mystery they keep to themselves.
In real life, White Naped Cranes live in the demilitarized zone of North Korea, but will migrate to other countries each year, primarily to Japan, where they depend on a specific sanctuary to feed them.
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(White-Naped Crane migration distribution)
I find that it does make sense for the majority of the population of White-Naped Cranes to go to Teikoku (Japan) during their migration, since the kingdom there would welcome the Cranes due to shared shamanistic beliefs, as well as possible information sharing about Flower Hill. Flower Hill doesn't necessarily like this, but the White-Naped Cranes are traditionally from Flower Hill, so for diplomatic purposes and migration rights, they are allowed to stay for now, even if they do run large temples in the south of the peninsula that the weasels flock to. Besides, their ability for Opera performances is superb at festivals (very popular in North Korea).
Their migrations have them bring back strange, new ideas of subservience to emperors and the old caste system, and they cause enough disruptions with their preaching that Flower Hill considers revoking their traditional permits to come and go as they please.
The carnivores in the south still believe that they are superior to smaller animals, so the cranes' preaching is more welcome there. Especially since Teikoku left a few colonies down there.
Which brings up the concept of migrating species that I will have to figure out, but I assume such travel will be allowed unless it will be too dangerous. There are small birds in the show that appear non-sentient at first glance, since they don't wear clothes, but they can also talk and participate in festivals.
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But most of the migrating species in Korea do appear to be the cranes. Ducks migrate as well, but I assume that the ducks in the show have eschewed that tradition since they are part of the navy.
So, I have created the leader of the White-Naped Cranes, Chongsu (Superior/Supreme leader). She is also a mudang shaman who participates in traditional rituals, as much as Flower Hill participates in those other than enjoying operas. Since the role of such a leader is hereditary, her father was the previous leader, who passed away due to a mysterious illness. However, she is rather young, and also sickly, so cannot leave her temple for long periods of time, and certainly not without an escort.
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(I'll find an OC generator that does cranes eventually. Or I'll just draw one myself)
Her biggest wish and command is for all races and species to get along with each other. What she does not realize, is that as the supreme leader, this could possibly be misinterpreted as a command for her people to reinstate the caste system, by any means possible, which could even mean teaming up with weasel or tiger leaders who also wish to return to the caste system.
As the leader of her group, she does occasionally have to meet with the Commanders of Flower Hill, but is sickly enough that the higher priests that serve as her guards often speak for her.
This makes the Flower Hill Commanders very suspicious of the White-Naped Crane population, because after all:
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The Commanders are very aware of the power she wields over the White-Naped Cranes, and that she could be manipulated into giving orders to perform hostile actions. They just don't know when it could happen, but assume it will due to their friendly relations with the enemy. But ordering the Cranes to stop leaving the country, investigating their loyalty, or ordering them to leave since they do share more beliefs with Teikoku than Flower Hill, could be seen as an illegal purge or discrimination towards a minority group by the international Hague courts, which would get Flower Hill in trouble and decrease support.
Since I am roughly using the world map as seen in the show, I am making up some names for countries that are somewhat related to the country and culture. Also, mostly focusing on countries that have strong relations with North Korea, both good and bad.
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I will be going with the idea that Rabbit Village is China. The police work with Flower Hill in capturing 'escaped criminals.'
Chaand Hadia (Moon Gift) is Pakistan. This country has a close relationship with North Korea in real life, to the point of smuggling in nuclear weapons.
Japan will be called Teikoku (Imperial State/country). They have tried to take over the Peninsula in the past, but an internal civil war and economic strife forced them to leave their colonies behind.
South Korea, with the weasels, I would think would be the colonies left behind, which still believe that Teikoku want them to take over Flower Hill, and possibly the continent. However, since the ideals and culture have drifted away from proper Teikoku values, it is unknown if their parent country wants anything to do with them. I have decided to call the country Usuhan Jiyeog (Superior Area/Territory). They also believe in weasel/carnivore superiority, and thus see Flower Hill as weak, and ripe for the taking.
Supposedly, the Wolf Unit represents America, to the point that US can be seen printed on merchandise in relation to the wolves. So I guess I'm calling the country the wolves came from the Unites States Alliance.
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Jindo Dog Island (or Jindo empire), is an actual place. It is the only location that has the authorization to breed the National Korean Jindo Dog. The waters there can be very dangerous, so it makes sense to turn it into a powerful nation.
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I also made up a country named Chambelli Koh, which is Urdu for Flower Hill, which will be used for a different AU. Although it could be used by both Flower Hill and Chaand Hadia as a buffer zone, since any invading weasels coming from that angle would take over that small country first.
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izzy-b-hands · 5 months ago
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Putting on last year's trans rigs stream from Drawfee before i have to get ready to go out with my mum and her bf today (bc i have the worst feeling in my gut he's gonna make that An Thing for me if given the chance today, aka whenever i eventually need the restroom while we're at Mystic)
#text post#Housemate was amazing and helped me calm down a bit before ae went to work bc my brain woke up in meltdown mode over this tbh#it sucks bc like. im excited to see my mum despite the Everything with that lmao#but im not excited for how her bf has been acting since they got here (and it's been day 1 out of 7 days)#with some outright homophobic comments while Housemate and i hosted them briefly at our house yesterday afternoon#not abt us but like. i mean. u know we're both queer so#doesn't really matter if it's abt us or not it's still fucky and makes me worry abt how he's gonna be today!!#doesn't help that he really wanted to go to Italy with her instead this summer#(despite the passive aggressive complaints from him & mum to a degree abt how expensive it was for them to come out here)#(we're ignoring the fact that a European trip would be even more expensive lmao tho i do think if they want to/can afford it they should go)#like. the Vibe from him has just been that he'll be Just Polite Enough but that he didn't want to be here#and he doesn't expect to have any fun and it's like#dude i am Trying. i and Housemate have looked up stuff to do that includes things he likes (like guns and historical weapons)#we tried making comments abt that yesterday like hey u might like this but if there's anything u have in mind already#and he was just. whatever idc but then made comments that made it clear he's not excited for anything else#like museums or the beach for sea glass hunting or the bird sanctuary or even the zoo#and all have places to rest/sit plus restrooms and food so I don't think it's a worry abt facilities thing for him#i think he's just fed up that I'm still involved in my mum's life since i moved and like#yes there's a detangling of the umbilical cord i and my past therapist were trying to eventually get my mum to cut#since cutting it myself in any attempt has had her metaphorically taping it back together#but like. it's not entirely on me here. I'm trying to set boundaries and make sure she's giving him more attention than me since he's w/her#more than i am now#i know he's upset when she helps me financially too (i offer to pay her back but she always refuses it) bc she took me aside yesterday#to give me some cash for the time with them for souvenirs/fun stuff i might not buy otherwise bc im trying to be mindful of money#aka still waiting on money my fkn job should have already paid me like. a week or more ago now#he makes her happy so even if he hates me i still care abt his frustrating ass#and i do want him to have as much fun as he can while still relaxing during the trip out here#but i feel like im gonna have to physically shake him by the shoulders screaming this before he listens#and even if he listens he probably won't believe me#sorry for the tag essay the edible hasn't kicked in yet can u guys tell lmao
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murobrown · 5 months ago
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#hello i just found out my dad might be getting another divorce and he's not telling me :))))#he might be already separated from his wife living back in my hometown with who knows who :))))))))#so he left a woman who he has cheated with on my mom and basically destroyed whole family :))))))))))))))#i don't have any reliable sources for this ans I can't ask him but it is eating me inside#and I had my suspicions since Christmas but I just thought they are having some tough period#so whenever I called him I tried to check of everything is okay and everything seemed okay#and I just hope they're still maybe just going through something but they will end up back together again#and i won't know because we don't talk about our problems in my family you need to be always happy#and god forbid you bother someone with your problems#i am sorry of this is too personal but it's making me freak out a little bit#i just can't stop thinking about it#and is it bad that I actually feel sad that I won't ever see his cats again if his wife keeps them?#ugh how the fuck can you divorce twice in your life?????#and does this mean that I also have some fucked up genes in me????#i was kinda hoping he would come to visit me for my birthday because I don't want to be alone but I doubt it will happen now#i just miss him and i want that he's hapy#okay that's enough i just needed to get this out of me#have a wonderful day everyone I'm going to take a shower because I ran 5km today so at least that's something positive
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dandyshucks · 6 months ago
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need Guz to hug me tightly for like an hour solid oh my god dhdjdkl I went driving for the first time in over a year and I chewed my lip raw 😭😭
I'm starting to look like a caricature of Anxiety with all these physical symptoms and signs LMAO
#this is so ridiculous fhfjdkdl#i do not like driving fjdkdl i know i should not be on the roads#but unfortunately i have to bc i live rural and also my parents insist i ''just need more practice''#practice is not going to fix the dissociation 😭😭 practice will not fix the Other Drivers being shitty and scary and reckless fjfkdl#it might make it slightly easier bc i wont have to think as hard about shoulder and mirror checks and roadsigns and speed limits#and where i am located on the road and intersection rules and whatnot#but like... it does not fix that i live in a town (and world lol) where ppl are fucking bonkers on the road#i had someone riding my ass for like a full five minutes. we had only two feet btwn us. MAYBE. IF THAT MUCH.#he was BIG mad that i was going the speed limit#and THERES A POLICE STATION LIKE RIGHT NEAR THAT AREA MY GUY IM NOT GONNA GO OVER THE SPEED LIMIT RIGHT THERE LMAO ????#also im a rule follower usually so i do tend to go Exactly the speed limit fjfkdl#and maaannn that makes people SO fucking angry dhfjdl its impossible to drive Anywhere without having someone right on ur bumper#its so ridiculous like... that's not helping anyone ??? ur not getting to ur destination faster by riding up on somebodys ass ???? hewwo ???#ANYWAYS. i drove around the neighborhood and then went up the highway and thru some intersections and then into the main core of town#and then i got my dad to take over from there bc it was lunch hour and the core of town is a lawless land at the best of times#MY NERVES ARE FRIED. i need Guz to act as a weighted blanket or one of those pressure therapy vests for me LOL#im like... shaking fhdjsl that was far more than i thought we were going to do for driving today good lord#IM OKAY THOUGH I SURVIVED I DIDNT EVEN HIT A CURB OR ANYTHING#i think I've only hit a curb once so far in all my times driving and that was on my second time driving on a road i think#so pretty good track record... im a very careful driver fjdkdl i work so hard to be safe and drive smoothly#during my driving test the only thing the test guy had to critique was that i waited at an intersection when i could've gone#but the reason i waited was bc i wasnt sure i could make it across the traffic lane before the oncoming vehicle got to us#so it was like. a safe decision overall but a little too hesitant which can actually be unsafe fjdkdl#AUGH ANYWAYS SORRY FOR RAMBLING SM#driving stresses me out so bad and my lip is all raw now and i have so many physical stress symptoms the past few days fhfjdl#after tonight i should be able to calm down a bit hopefully fhfkdl theres a thing we're going to tonight thats been stressing me out so bad#but after tonight it'll be over and hopefully I can get myself settled down again fjfjdkl#dandy.cmd#vent //
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