#so that’s why it’s kind of bad lol
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I finally watched arcane s2
#no one talk to me I am so emo rn#anyways…. this is just a rlly quick and rough warmup because I cannot draw anything related to arcane without being a blubbering mess#and crying all over my iPad#so that’s why it’s kind of bad lol#it’s meant to be bad#I cannot listen to remember me without tears swelling up in my eyes#anyways…… im gonna go recover by playing stupid toilet humour games#arcane#timebomb#shroomer's sketches !#ekko#jinx
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love when ppl defend the aggressive monetization of the internet with "what, do you just expect it to be free and them not make a profit???" like. yeah that would be really nice actually i would love that:)! thanks for asking
#yes i want things to be free like ??? that is not a weird desire#'but but it costs money to keep up' ok and? how is that my problem#the government has plenty of murder dollars they could reallocate a few to make internet services universal if they wanted#also these companies were perfectly capable of supporting themselves before the internet got drowned with ads so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#edit: muting notifs on this post bc new additions have kind of petered out#so no one feel bad about adding something someone else has said‚ it is not bothering me im just trying to keep my#notifs page cleanish lol#also since i saw some people are being redirected to read my tags: firstly hiiiiii this is a special secret message for you:3#secondly i have learned since making this that the reason they were able to support themselves previously was because#of investors bankrolling everything#and theyre now finally realizing that theyre never going to actually make a profit and arent as willing to invest#however thats just a minor correction and doesnt change my overall point#once again. so many murder dollars#so thats why im just adding it here in the tags rather than making an actual correction#anyways . love yall 💕#origibberish#bigger gibbers
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Please, someone stop me from listening to Josh Groban, because otherwise I will end up DRAWING ANOTHER "MOTTIE AT BED" ARTWORK.
Like seriously, I cannot.
When I hear him sing "You have no idea" all I can hear is Mathias singing to Dorothea AND MY HEART CANNOT TAKE IT.
IT'S EXPLODING WITH SOFT TENDERNESS.
(and I have become the joke of my own household, because my husband, loving Josh as much as I do, now DOES IT ON PURPOSE OF PUTTING HIM ON OUR SPEAKERS, especially when he sees that I am busy working on something not Mottie-related. He knows how my brain works. HE KNOWS IT. So if sometimes you see me derailing, IT'S MR. NEMO'S FAULT AS WELL).
#Nemo babbles#good gods today I need to get stuff done#and here I am#brain empty only Mathias thoughts lol#ok tbh Mottie thoughts#but gods#it's the fluff#the unconditional love#the type of love that is born from the soul#the one that is built on trust and respect#the one where you know that you are loved completly#flaws included#fml#FML#I honestly either go from obsessive toxic ships (Mephistea am look at you) to most wholesome. Like there is no in-between.#And if you wonder why I jump in between#it's partially because I am easily distracted#but also because I need to give my own brain some respite from the different kind of emotions that these things elicit in me#as I said often#I feel ALL that I write#And that is true for good and bad emotions alike#Mephistea is intense as a ship#like INTENSE LIKE FIRE#And Mottie instead is soft and gentle#so I need to balance out#otherwise I run the risk of burning out lolololl
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Director of the False Last Act
#orv#omniscient reader's viewpoint#orv spoilers#han sooyoung#art i made#another of the drawings i fished out of my drafts that i completely forgot id started#if the face doesnt look like how i usually draw hsy uh. i apparently did the lineart like 4 months ago#and the way i used to draw her was WAY different#like i had to redo the face cuz i was like man this aint my girl wtf#oh yeah the sort of. watsonian reason why the title of the book shes holding is scrubbed out is bc it could either be twsa or orv i guess#the doylist reason is i couldnt decide between twsa or orv so now its neither LOL#side note but like. intellectually i know the thousand hand guan yin is like an actual thing in buddhism but my familiarity with it is#mostly from the dance move#so like as i was colouring this i was just imagining hsy like creating this pose in universe w the avatars which. one hell of an image#only two of the hands are supposed to represent like specific points in the story the rest are just. symbolic...?#the lemon candy one is obvious and the knife one is meant to be from when she stabs 49!kdj in the epilogue#also holy god im so bad at coming up with backgrounds for this kind of art#the original background i had i think i was trying to make it look like some kind of. book cover...? hence the borders#whatever it was it wasnt working#now i have no idea what its supposed to be 👍 like its giving. poorly designed tarot card
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I argued with some random asshole on the internet a while ago and I noticed I made them feel really bad with my anger, I decided to at least get them some groceries as a apology gift because I know they struggling too, few days ago I went over to talk about the situation while calm and to properly apologize, made sure to let the person know that they don't gotta talk to me that it's ok if they don't want anything to do with me, they agreed and added me to a group chat with their girlfriend and then proceeded to berate me for the next 4 hours straight taking turns to call me names 😭 and I'll tell you what. To be called creepy and obsessed for sending the money and get berated for that too??? Like I know $50 isn't like a huge amount nowadays but it was half of all the money in my bank account at the time. And it was a tough decision to make because I am already struggling to pay rent and because I'm too disabled to work. I snapped out of it immediately, like wow no wonder I got mad at them in the first place.
The moral of the story is, don't try to fix things with the worst people you have ever met, your gut feeling was right, there's a reason why you got angry. It will only harm you and make you harm them, too, when you eventually get emotional and pissed off over how they treated you and then use it against you. Whatever you do won't be enough and taken as the worst possible thing to do. Simply fuck off. That's the best outcome for everyone that will hurt the least amount of people.
#also like#this is completely unrelated to the point but i have called them a stalker multiple times#and while talking to me they started bringing up that i have been feeling bad lately and if im still dating my boyfriend and are we happy#like what is that about?#how do you see my posts why are you asking me this its kind of freaking me out#or telling me that me and my bf are trying to be them like????????#we dont even think about you and when we do we just laugh at your dumbass in call we do not care LOL#either way this is so insane and i need to vent it out and share my experience to people because what on earth#for context i have blocked them on all social platforms so they have to be following me on burners just to keep up with me#which is definitely normal behavior#my little oniisionling incel stalker saga
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The parts of you that support me
#mgs2 my favorite game i love you#metal gear solid 2#mgs2 sons of liberty#mgs2 raiden#rosemary mgs#emma emmerich#Anyways let me elaborate on the piece here in the tags again#I really like the skeletal motif that raiden's rib cage suit and the aicolonel's face turning into a skull have going on#so it's kind of an extension here. It's 'parts of me that support you' that are outlined as the bones.#For raiden his vitals are literally keeping sunny alive. So his rib cage. For the colonel he's constantly feeding raiden bad info to keep-#-the mission afloat. His skull#For emma she created the arsenal gear worm (hands)#And for rose i mean obviously like. shes pregnant in this game. but its got a bigger meaning for the plot and for raiden specifically#since it's part of the reason why he tries to be better. Her connection to him is what keeps him grounded during the whole mission#and together they all form the 'vital' organs#Alternatively i wanted to name this 'malfunctioning machine' but anyone can probably figure out that one if they wanted. Lol#Back to your regularly scheduled tagging program!#beanie art#mgs fanart#metal gear solid fanart#mgs2 fanart#mgs2
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honestly i just dont get why sometimes people get all weird about quadrants and insist they’re unhealthy always no matter what
like yeah im not stupid i know they CAN be fucked up and can be weird and toxic but so can any romance. human romance has been toxic and fucked up for me many times. tbh if we take a step back and just look at the basic ideas of all of them i don’t think any of those have to be evil and terrible necessarily
like oh no me and my boyfriend have a fun rivalry that we both like being in and both agreed to where we have fun competing with each other and talking shit and then make out! FUCK!!! that’s horrible i would NEVER want that! i would never be guilty of forcing my boyfriend to play tetris with me over and over and insulting him the entire time
oh no my boyfriend has anxiety and i calm him down! oh god we like cuddling and talking about feelings! we both agreed we like this relationship dynamic and feel fulfilled by it! AAA SCARY!!! GET SCARED!!!
oh no sometimes my boyfriends are both annoying and i voluntarily get between that and make people be less annoying! FUCK!!!!!!!! we are going to DIVORCE!!!
#it’s cool if you don’t personally want any of those things#and yeah#alternia is fucked up#big fucked up murder planet#they love insane fucked up rules that are bad for everyone#but idk i feel like all romance is kind of fucked up#and you usually always have to do an insane amount of work to make it healthy and normal lol#and none of these dynamics by necessity HAVE to be horrible#you don’t HAVE to only rely on your moirail and not talk to your friends about your feelings#you don’t HAVE to get fucked up with your kismesis#you don’t HAVE to be a sad unfulfilled auspistice who kinda gets pushed into the relationship#if i’m thinking about the dynamics purely just as concepts#none of that shits a requirement#idk if this makes any sense to anyone else lmao#i just mean like#i don’t think any of those things are uniquely terrible i guess not in any ways that human romance isn’t#and people manage to have ok human romances all the time#not as often as they should lmao#but sometimes#so why not quadrants#i can get being uncomfortable with them#they’re weird#and definitely more complex than i went into in the post#but i don’t think they’re uniquely terrible
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Designs for adult versions of the clone cadets in bad batch as Rebellion leaders
The first weird thing I noticed was that they kept specifying that tbb are "defective CTs", whereas iirc most other clones leave out the "ct" part. additionally, "special training" must have been a reasonably expected occurrence for them, since it was used as the Hemlock-jungle-lab excuse. they're also, oddly enough, the only three survivors from a base full of both cadets and adult clones. and finally, all three of them have noticeably different face shapes.
so my guess for their origins is that they're the results of the kaminoans trying to replicate tbb's mutations in a commando template, making them all specialized CC command cadets. From what we've seen of them, they don't seem to have quite as prominent abilities as say, wrecker or hunter, but are definitely above average to have survived that long.
Anyways the mini-backstory for them here is that they end up joining the rebellion around 5 years later (assuming that they're 6/12 and 8/16 in tbb s3, they would be 11/22 and 13/26 here) as the lead squad for the clone rebel cell after rex, wolffe, and gregor retire (and echo and cody are presumably dead).
Bonus: I originally had Deke's hair as dyed blond, but then he started looking too much like Rex (esp with the jaig eyes and partial arc armor) so I changed it back
edit: sorry i forgot to tag spoilers at first! it has since been fixed
#star wars#clone cadets#tbb#the bad batch#tbb s3#tbb spoilers#bad batch spoilers#tbb mox#tbb deke#tbb stak#redbean art#also i redesigned them a bit because their show appearances were kind of weird looking#also yes they made killing the jungle-sarlacc their entire personality lol#deke is arc-adjacent#mox is commando-adjacent#stak is a pilot#idk how clear it is in the pics but they all have a rebel insignia somewhere on their armor#they also all have a sarlacc-y element somewhere on their armor#deke has his as the focus of his paint#stak has a vine tentacle thing on his helmet#and mox has sarlacc teeth on his helmet#btw staks helmet is a rebel pilot helmet spliced onto the lower half of a p2 clone pilot helmet#hopefully they dont look too lumpy#i think this is the first time ive drawn clone armor in an actual pose that i didnt just copy from refs#and definitely teh first time drawing clone faces#i have. so many ref tabs open rn. why must clone armor be so geometrically complicated#i have more thoughts about the clone rebellion (i have mentally named it jaig cell) idk if you guys are interested in hearing it#also probably another korto vos incoming
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Genuinely tweaking tf out because last chapter dropped and I'm so soul-wrenched pulled apart at the seams and unraveling that I don't even have the energy to cry lmaoo. Tbh i never expected to get this attached to a character/s (all of them, really- Shingen, Somi, Shintaro) and it sounds kind of stupid when I write it down here but still.
My heart breaks for all of them; Shingen, who had to live his life burdened by his clan duties. Shintaro, who had to live his life never being the first choice, of always being tethered to the rules. Somi, who, I think (I hope) loved her child, but just a little too late, and for Gun, poor, sweet Gun, who had to see them all die before his eyes.
They weren't good- they were a terrible family by all means (talking about the adults here obv), but somehow I can't bring myself to hate them for it. It's hard to express what I'm really feeling lol but I just hope. I just hope they're all finally at peace, now. Somehow, somewhere.
I hope Shingen and Shintaro get to be the kids that their childhood never allowed them to be, I hope Somi gets to smile more freely, and I hope that Gun can be happy and unburdened by his past. I hope.
#its kinda pathetic abt how im mourning over literal fictional ppl lmaoo#but like.#im so deeply attached??#idk#i started reading lookism when i was in a really bad place#and it took my mind off things for a while#especially my glorious king shintaro yk 😍😍#ig thats why its kind of a hard pill to swallow lol#but still#STILL#i think im losinh my mind lollll#nvm me#im js rambling atp#i need sleep#and possibl therapy lol#but its okayy#(its not IM SCREAMING CRYING THROWIHG UP I NEED A GOOD NICE HAPPY FIC WHERE NOTH9NG BAD HAPPENED AND THEY'RE ALL SAFE AND HAPPY OK)#also this ended up on a much more sadder note than i intended it to be lolll#SHINTARO MY LOVE MY BABY MY POOR SWEET DARLING COME BACK#I NEED YOU#HHHHHHHHHHHUH#lookism#shintaro yamazaki#gun park#shingen yamazaki#somi park#SHINTARO#SHINTAROOOOOOO
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saw my queen yesterday ❤️ lady in red <3
#erika vikman#it's so nice that my last gig of the year was erika PHEW#going to non kä gigs is always such a breath of fresh air for how uncomplicated it is#i showed up 20 mins before doors and BOOM. front row babey!#though the thingy before the barricade was SO UNCOMFORTABLE to sit on it had these little raised spots#& after awhile it felt like i was sitting on spikes 😭😂#so the two hour wait for the gig to start wasn't all that pleasant even if it didn't feel like much after all the suffering of kä gigs lmao#LOL ANYWAY why am i complaining#i mean nobody is reading these tags anyway it's fine#hiiii if you are though 👋#anyways yes my queen erika was GREAT!!! she's such an amazing performer#the dangly bits of her outfits kept falling off it was kind of funny seeing them all over the stage and her kicking them off awh#and hmm she had to cancel some gigs before bc of lingering problems with her voice after an illness and you could kind of tell in parts#that her voice isn't back to 100% yet 😭💔#mind you not to say she sounded bad not at ALL i just hope she fully gets better <3#hopefully i'll get to see her again many a time in 2025 🥰#her music is such a vibe it's so lovely to jam to it live
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I need to make a point of saying that contrary to popular belief, I do not read. I do not enjoy reading, I hate being asked to read things, reading is exhausting and a chore. I like to write just for the sake of writing. The act of writing itself gives me so much gratification just to be able to do it!
But if I saw this bitch in the wild at 300k+ words I would never fucking touch it LMAOO doesn't matter HOW good it is man that's way too fucking long
what the fuck was I THINKING LMAO THIS SHIT IS INSANE I WOULD NEVER READ THIS
Not saying I think MM is bad or not worth the read. I certainly think it is! But for like, you know, people who like to read. Not me LOL glad some of y'all literally will sit and re-read this shit regularly though. Y'all juggernauts for that
It's not even like I write topics that I don't enjoy. I certainly enjoy them, otherwise I wouldn't be writing them. But I like writing them, not reading them. But that's not exclusive to topics, I just don't read anything in general
#how the fuck do y'all sit still that long#I get so exhausted sitting and reading#This is why I don't even reread my own work man#do I risk grammar errors and flow issues? absolutely#but would I rather drink bleach than go back and edit my work? 100%#listen I'll write until I die#I'd love to know if there's anybody else out there that's like me#hates to read loves to write#where my chronic writers at#chronic writer needs to be paired with chronic reader I swear to god I'll constantly feed them for a crumb of affection#just don't ask me to read shit#I need a fucking editor bad lol#my hobbies? writing and drawing#that's kind of it really I don't do anything else
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Friday Nights are so uncomfortable
#fields of mistria#player character#I know hes like everyones pookie bear but i am the one hater lol#we are not friends march your vibes are too bad your tsundere too strong#i think i just have an intense aversion to gameplay where you have to be super accomodating and placating to be respected#like why would i befriend someone that says the things March does i guess is what im saying#and unlike other characters he kind of doesnt acknowledge anything you do for the town even tho thats v specifically an issue he has w you#so theres no way to have neutral ground w him to wven begin to be his friend unless youre putting in all the effort thats how these games g#so when hes judt randomly nice to you every friday night its ssuuuuuper weird and offputting to me#like no actually my character wouldnt be fine with that theyd be really confused and weirded out#anyway March Friday Nights is an imposter idk where the real march is but thats not him
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Ok I know I'm heavily biased here but like I kinda love that Astarion's romance is one of the few in this type of video game where you basically end up canonically unmarried and childfree in his "good" ending? Just travelling the world??
Like it's honestly the millennial dream lmfaoo cannot believe i chose what would undoubtedly be my favorite option, first try
#also love that he's basically atheist like ok thanks you made the man exactly coded to be my type#and the humor and beautiful curly hair is very much something my IRL partner has too so like... how can i resist#anyways not sure a lot of people relate cause i think a lot of people want that fairytale romance#even tho wyll is right there yall#but i love me an unconventional or nontraditional one!!#i'm TIRED of being married with children as the endgame pls let's not do it#also a lot of people seem into him being a dad and im like... how? why? where in canon did he ever lmfao#more power to ya if you dig it but i just dont see it being in character#like in DAI i loved cullen and my inquisitor getting married and having a dog#and they seem the type to wants kids one day. but Tav & Astarion? lol no#i just think it's neat#is this a hot take? i have no idea but i don't see it mentioned a lot as a new fan tbh#pls do not come at me you can enjoy whatever you like#i haven't seen the ascended stuff so idk if being his 'consort' is like being his bride#but i feel like overall it's not and the vibe isn't all that different in this sense#except that you're hosting evil parties instead of travelling :/#Astarion#bg3 spoilers#baldur's gate 3#baldur's gate 3 spoilers#bg3#also YEA he's nice to Arabella but you can tolerate certain kids without wanting one or being 'good parent' material#case in point: me lmfao#OKAY update i saw the AA stuff and yeah you're kind of implied vamp married and he does mention spawn as children 😫#but he also says in banter he won't make any other spawn??? so what is it dude#anyway that's also clearly the “bad” route and he doesn't seem as happy as unascended#who feels “truly free”#and if you're durge I'm pretty sure its even worse to consider having kids?? lol#but i digress#pk plays bg3
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The L Word: Lookbook ↳ 1.13, Locked Up
#the l word#jennifer schecter#mia kirshner#bette porter#jennifer beals#leisha hailey#kate moennig#shane mccutcheon#alice pieszecki#tina kennard#laurel holloman#marina ferrer#karina lombard#kit porter#pam grier#kelly lynch#ivan aycock#Candace Jewell#Ion Overman#OK IS THAT ALL THE FUCKING NAMES#2 really nice outfits in this are jennys one at the aquarium with the cross hairpins and#the secondone is one alice wore at the bar but there was not a good shot long enough of it so possible alice solo post coming up#also jennys really cute date outfit#i kind of like the prison garb for how funny it is and also that is probably one of my favourite scenes in the show just ugh everything#also i really like kit and tinas all blakc work outfit situations except tina is wearing a skirt for some reason in it like a pencil skirt#which is just not that nice (bette powersuit is not giffed but did exist) but kits ruffled long skirt i love it#also these are downloaded in shaky quality which is why the ivan firsy gif looks so bad but i did want itin there#one of the very few instances of actual play with gender in the show LOL and the scene u see some butches and such#count your blessings...#tlwlb
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Growing closer than expected (Patreon)
#Doodles#Pokemon#Kabu#Larry#Firebland#Silverstreakshipping#To the shock of no one this is Zarla's fault (lol)#Bad influence! Too inspiring! Stop this! I'm totally not culpable for Being Inspired for the [X]th time now definitely lol#I kept finding little ideas popping into my head with them and I mean if I've already doodled them Once I guess I could try a couple more#Learned them just well enough to keep finding things for them pft#Although I am surprised by just how easy I find Larry to Draw - not necessarily that I'm fully Confident in drawing him yet but like#There's very little struggle to the shapes I put down here and I'm fairly pleased with their configuration haha#Kabu on the other hand!! Why is he so hard to draw!!! What!! Like I know his clothes are complex but no his face!#He's got a really cute and difficult-to-draw face! Why! I cannot figure him out#It's probably the do with the shape and size of his head...his hair........ I really enjoy fluff and he's Kind of but Not Really fluffy??#And his white streaks aren't intuitive to me - but Larry's floofs are??? I don't know#The only thing I can figure it that I Kind Of draw Dexter the same way - Larry's streaks are like an exaggerated version of how I floof Dex#And then a suit is second nature by now but I've already talked about my difficulties with Kabu's clothes lol#Didn't stop me from putting him out front for this hug tho! It's cute... Kabu asking Larry to come play with him but Larry has stuff to do#May or may not have felt a little that way myself - made most of these doodles during Requestober haha so busy!#The brightly shining brilliant glow boyfriend setup-payoff returns ♥ He glows like a fire! Overwhelming!#I still really love that glow cutaway style around the low-bouncing flower haha - just don't draw there and it gives the impression! Fun :)#Hugs <3 Unsurprisingly been in the want of cute fluff and sweetness and hugs were very on the menu#It really is fun to think of Larry being just a Little weird about how much he feels for Kabu#Acting childish as that part of him hasn't had the chance to grow and mature! Stuck awkward and gangly in otherwise full development#Feelings so big and strong and immediate for the first time in too too long <3 Gotta express them all somehow#And ending off with a bit of silliness haha - was Kabu prompting him just to hear such an answer? Who knows ��#Larry just too straightforward haha - why else would he do or say things unless he felt like it! Pfsh obviously#Haha
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I’m so curious about your headcanons of Diane, personality, her history with Rick, etc.
tbh I’ve been seeing content of Diane being “a sweet and gentle bimbo housewife with 2 braincells” and I grew tired of it…. So I thought of this!! For me I like to think that she was a cool and badass woman rather than a shy, timid woman… I also think it’s somewhat canon (according to the fandom) that she’s the breadwinner of the family (haven’t figured out her job yet) while Rick is a stay-at-home parent and takes care of Beth, also she’s intelligent!!! Not as smart as Rick though but like she’s not airhead.
What do you think ?? and what are your thoughts on Diane ? <3
I mean I knew Diane wasn't gonna be an airhead since we know Rick is attracted to power lol (like Unity says it's planning to become the universe, practically a god and Rick is like super into it so obviously Diane has to have some semblance of ambition and the ability to take charge lmao)
I'll be honest though I didn't love her depiction in Fear no mort (obvious reasons are obvious) but I did always picture her as a woman who could handle herself and is sarcastic and teasing (affectionately) and strong-willed
I actually wrote stuff in my notes app about their dynamic and made this little venn diagram about it
bonus: here's the personality traits that I think Beth gets from them
#rick and morty#rick sanchez#diane sanchez#beth sanchez#beth smith#headcanon#asks#thank you for this ask btw!! I could talk about this stuff for hours#also lol notes app#amramdoods#i don't believe in stay at home rick though?? idk why lol#i have it in my mind that rick and diane work together (in one comic they do i think and i really liked that) like they're a science couple#that also adds to the kind of neglectful nature that they seem to have with beth kinda but like i hc them to feel really bad about it#because they do love her but they have a hard them juggling things so it's either like all in on science#or all in on romance or all in on being good parents to their daughter but never at the same time
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