#LOL ANYWAY why am i complaining
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
saw my queen yesterday ❤️ lady in red <3
#erika vikman#it's so nice that my last gig of the year was erika PHEW#going to non kä gigs is always such a breath of fresh air for how uncomplicated it is#i showed up 20 mins before doors and BOOM. front row babey!#though the thingy before the barricade was SO UNCOMFORTABLE to sit on it had these little raised spots#& after awhile it felt like i was sitting on spikes 😭😂#so the two hour wait for the gig to start wasn't all that pleasant even if it didn't feel like much after all the suffering of kä gigs lmao#LOL ANYWAY why am i complaining#i mean nobody is reading these tags anyway it's fine#hiiii if you are though 👋#anyways yes my queen erika was GREAT!!! she's such an amazing performer#the dangly bits of her outfits kept falling off it was kind of funny seeing them all over the stage and her kicking them off awh#and hmm she had to cancel some gigs before bc of lingering problems with her voice after an illness and you could kind of tell in parts#that her voice isn't back to 100% yet 😭💔#mind you not to say she sounded bad not at ALL i just hope she fully gets better <3#hopefully i'll get to see her again many a time in 2025 🥰#her music is such a vibe it's so lovely to jam to it live
28 notes
·
View notes
Text
Guys imagine, Roach died, before the creation of 141, but Soap is able to see his ghost. He was originally following Ghost around, really annoyed that he was using his death as an excuse to not get close to anyone, but when he found out Soap could see him and talk to him he started following him around instead.
And they get really close, like two peas in a pod, except they have to be discreet about it because no one else can see or hear Roach, and they'd think Soap was crazy if they saw him talking to no one.
They use that for shenanigans too: Roach will go follow someone else and report back to Soap, Gaz is genuinely starting to believe Soap has superpowers or something. It's really useful on missions as well, and Soap managed to successfully rescue team members thanks to Roach being able to move through walls and everything.
(Roach is not the only ghost Soap is able to see btw, just the only one he's talking to.)
And then Roach is witnessing his past lover trying really hard to not fall in love with Soap, and Soap trying really hard to not do anything about the love he already feels, and he has to try and convince Soap that he is dead. During that conversation he finds out that something else that keeps Soap from doing something is that he feels very confused about everything because he also has feeling for Roach.
So now Roach has to try and convince him that even if he was still alive he wouldn't have a problem with that. He's known for a while that he was polyamorous, but he hadn't really dared talking to Ghost about that because he thinks he's jealous and possessive.
And Soap is like "oh yeah, you want me to go say to Ghost 'don't worry about your dead lover that I'm not supposed to know, he's actually polyamorous and also in love with me, I know because his ghost told me!' ??? I'm sure he's gonna take that well!"
But Roach is nothing if not resourceful and he manages to put Soap in situations where he's forced to interact with Ghost, and eventually they kiss and their relationship is beginning to be something. They're not really sure what.
And Roach is sad, because he has to watch the two men he loves being in love without him, yes, but at least they're both happy, and it makes him feel a bit better. And then during a mission Ghost almost dies.
Because he was alone and Soap and Gaz were together, Roach was following Ghost this time, ready to fly to Soap in an instant if there was any problems. But there was and he didn't have time, so he instinctively grabbed the gun being pointed towards Ghost's head and moved it as the person was shooting, saving Ghost's life, giving him enough time to shoot the enemy himself.
But even as the threat is eliminated, Ghost is still looking up from where he's on the ground, staring right through him, looking shocked. No, not right through him, he realises when he moves to the side and Ghost's eyes follow him. He also realises that he grabbed the gun. He's never grabbed anything before, in all his years of being a ghost.
Then suddenly Ghost's eyes move wildly around, and he figures he disappeared from his view. He can still go through the walls, but he's kept the ability to grab stuff when he wants. It gives him a ton of new possibilities, to fuck with people and, of course, to touch Soap.
"I wish you were actually alive," Soap whispers to him, holding his hands against his face as he's falling asleep.
"What the fuck," comes Ghost's voice the next morning, waking both of them up - wait, since when could Roach sleep?
Soap doesn't understand immediately, because he's always been able to see Roach. But Ghost is standing in the door, looking straight at dead past lover.
Turns out Soap is a necromancer and he had no idea, though the whole 'I can see dead people' should probably have told him sooner that he wasn't normal... The more he wishes Roach is alive, the more he actually is. And they all end up happy and together. And Gaz is very happy to have won the bet that Soap indeed has superpowers.
The day Roach says, in a wondering voice, "I... I think I'm hungry" is the day they understand that something is really happening and he's actually coming back to life.
(Also, Soap has no control at all on his abilities, he has no idea what does what and why, he knows nothing. No one knows.)
#cod mw2#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#gary roach sanderson#soapghost#ghostsoap#roachsoap#ghostroach#ghostsoaproach#accidental necromancer soap and ghost roach au#this is not organised at all bc my head has been hurting for days and i feel like i'm dying (i'm being overly dramatic don't worry)#this came to me when i was watching megamind don't ask me why#anyway i can't even read that again bc the words make no sense to me when my head hurts so sorry if it actually makes no sense for real lol#omg imagine ghost being interrogated bc someone reported him for sleeping with soap and he goes 'do i sleep with my sergeant?#yes i do but i don't only sleep with one of my sergeants i actually sleep with two of them; one having been dead for 4 years'#and they go 'dead as in... pronounced dead but actually alive?' 'no no dead as in actually dead as in buried; dead dead'#'so you *were* sleeping with him in the past?' 'no i am currently sleeping with him. with both of them.'#and then price has to gaslight sooo hard to make it all right they're literally taking years off his lifespan#and when he complains they giggle at him saying that it's alright bc soap will bring him back anyway if he dies for their sins
527 notes
·
View notes
Text
hello. im having mixed feelings about veilguard. also. if i had a penny for every time a long awaited sequel absolutely obliterated and went scorched earth on a favourite place/faction of mine **this year**, i'd have two pennies, but its weird that it happened twice.
#ok i know some people are gonna be like ofc ur complaining but after doing some lurking#im seeing people are having the same issues with the game that i am. so uh. idk man#ive sank 70 hours into this playthrough and idk if i can be bothered to finish#i just dont care for these lore choices and the story they have gone with#im tired of modern media constantly needing to explain everything and have it all connect together#what is wrong with mystery. please tell me.#anyway. many issues. chief among them is why did i stop the 5th blight in origins if ur just gonna wipe ferelden off the map in 20 years#with a second better and bigger blight. lol. lmao#da4 spoilers#dragon age the veilguard spoilers#dragon age veilguard spoilers#veilguard spoilers
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
Lol
#theres nothing quite like your mother saying Well maybe you shouldve been more careful because now your boss might think youve been flirting#with this male coworker (whom i like splendidly as a friend) and now maybe she thinks youre not trustworthy#and maybe she regrets hiring you because you said you feel like youre making a lot of mistakes this week and she might assume thats because#your head is filled with this boy.#so dont make her regret hiring you.#MA'AM I TOLD YOU I WAS ALREADY ANXIOUS BECAUSE I MADE SO MANY MISTAKES TODAY WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME ASHAMED#OF SOMETHING THAT I HONESTLY HAD NO CLUE I OUGHT TO BE ANXIOUS ABOUT AT MY FIRST NEW JOB AFTER IVE GRADUATED????#anyway going to bed i cant take this anymore LOL she said it so lightly and im like. well i never even considered#being afraid of making my boss regret hiring me somehow because of some kind of behaviour that i had no idea was sending some kind of signal#anywaysssss 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#and then she was like why are you crying?? 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀#not to be like this is partly why i didnt want to move home but confound it all why are things like this#can i not simply confide in my mother my anxieties and worriws#worries#and not also have to worry about her potentially being like Well have you considered you ARE right and it IS your fault?#idk man something something firstborn child eldest daughter can i have some room to breathe. please#also not to whine but Not my father walking in on me eating dinner at 10pm because i was holed up#in my room in a semi depressive state after so many gong shows in a work day and straight up having no appetite#but deciding my body needs the food anyway its better late than never.....walking in and then saying#you know if you eat this late you'll gain weight. SIR??????????????????#sorry to complain and rant again i simply cannot in this house and whats more am doing my best to honour my parents#but why is it so hard out here and how can they say stuff like that with a smile!!!!!!!#also i DO have an inner critic who is always like Its your fault you are the worst you should be ashamed always........why do my parents#not understand after knowing me for so long and watching me grow up#that i can make myself so ashamed of the smallest thing so easily and that what they say drives me to shame almost as easily?#ANYWAY LOL WHAT A DAY#you guys!!! i am working so hard i promise i PROMISE I am!!! it is my first full time job ever and i am working so so hard#i am doing my absolute best and no one sees it and that is FINE i just wish my parents would see that i AM trying!!#i come back home so dead every single day because i put in 120%! this is literally my first job after graduation#and my parents KNOW this has been the most exhausting taxing and soul crushing year ive had in my very short life so far
21 notes
·
View notes
Note
you are complaining about complaining too much while complaining about the fact that maybe people dont like you because you complain too much while complaining about being alone. just stop complaining and do something about it. talk to people. reach out. dont just wait for someone to come to you first.
i have tried reaching out to different people in the past year or so but it never works. i understand its my own fault for letting relationships decay because of my own insecurities and issues but that doesn't mean i can just will myself to think or believe different things about myself. it's a self fulfilling prophecy ; i think people don't like me so i don't reach out so people don't like me etc . i am sure you do not want to hear me list all the things i want to say in response so i will put them in the tags.
#every time i try to reach out or talk to someone it goes nowhere. i dont have any social skills anymore and have no clue how to keep a#conversation going. half the time even when i do people stop replying to me. which is fine theydont owe me a reply but still feels likeshit#when i tried to make one new irl friend it just didn't work because they have better options for friends. we spoke occasionally but never#messaged online like ever and would only talk when we happened to be in the same place. i tried multiple times to organize a time to hangou#none of which came to pass. i dont understand why this one didn't work because i thought this person was interested in being my friend but#i guess i was wrong or thought they were more interested than they really were.#i have a problem with reaching out anyway which has been a problem i have had since i was like 11. reaching out to people first doesnt come#easily to me - in the beginning when i was a lot younger i didn't want to bother people with my presence & thought if i were to come to#someone first they would feel pressured into talking to me when they didn't want to. this is stupid of course. but has still not left me as#something i feel is very core to the way i act today. waiting for someone to come to me first feels like my only option because i do not#know how to reach out effectively (my evidence being i have failed every time i have tried) & i am convinced people dont like me in the#first place and do not want me to approach them.#i dont really even know who to reach out to in the first place. my world is extremely narrow. the number of people i know has shrunk#significantly and my standing in their eyes collectively has also shrunk significantly in the past few years. i feel like every person i#was once friends with wants nothing to do with me. i feel as if i have burned every bridge possible.#when it comes to the fact i complain all the time . which i know of course is annoying. its because i cant find any kind of joy in anything#i do or see or whatever. nothing makes me happy - i only see things to complain about. all stimulus seems grating and the world seems#specifically catered to make me miserable. all i can really do is complain. i treat this blog like a stream of consciousness and when most#of that consciousness is occupied with how much i hate being alive the blog will mostly be complaining. its a vicious cycle lol .#anyway . i guess the key theme is low self esteem begets low self esteem in many ways. mental illness begets mental illness.#i am not really saying this to anyone least of all to you anon. i just felt compelled to recount i guess for myself the reasons that came#to mind for why i am like this. i am talking to myself here
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm not an extrovert. At all. In everyday life, I'm a yapper, sure, but I need someone to first assure me I am okay to yap, so I don't start conversations, even when I really want to join in sometimes! It's just the social anxiety acting up. God knows where from and why I lose a lot of my inhibitions when it comes to talking to people about music. I don't know where the confidence has suddenly sprung from. I've made a crazy amount of friends in musical circles, either just talking to people about common music or (since it is after all in music circles) talking to bands about their own music. I let out a sigh of relief any time an interaction goes well, because in truth it's going against my every instinct. I wish I could do that in everyday life
#like that's the point where we need to remind everyone around me that as much as I say#radio is 'a job'-- it's not 'my job' lol. I wish I was this interested in data science#but like. Honestly?? I'm not even a data scientist!? I answered a few questions about classical AI having come from a computer science back#background and now people are saying to me 'I know you're a data scientist and not a programmer' sir I am a computer scientist#what are you on about#and like I guess I get to google things and they're paying me so I'm not complaining but like I am not a data scientist#my biggest data scientist moment was when I asked 'do things in data science ever make sense???' and a bunch of data scientists went#'no :) Welcome to the club' ???????#why did I do a whole ass computer science degree then. Does anyone at all even want that anymore. Has everything in the realm of#computer science just been Solved. What of all the problems I learned and researched about. Which were cool. Are they just dead#Ugh the worst thing the AI hype has done rn is it has genuinely required everyone to pretend they're a data scientist#even MORE than before. I hate this#anyway; I wish I didn't hate it and I was curious and talked to many people in the field#like it's tragicomedy when every person I meet in music is like 'you've got to pursue this man you're a great interviewer blah blah blah'#and like I appreciate that this is coming from people who themselves have/are taking a chance on life#but. I kinda feel like my career does not exist anymore realistically so unless 1) commercial radio gets less shitty FAST#2) media companies that are laying off 50% of their staff miraculously stop or 3) Tom Power is suddenly feeling generous and wants#a completely unknown idiot to step into the biggest fucking culture show in the country (that I am in no way qualified for)#yeah there's very very little else. There's nothing else lol#Our country does not hype. They don't really care for who you are. f you make a decent connection with them musically they will come to you#Canada does not make heroes out of its talent. They will not be putting money into any of that. Greenlight in your dreams.#this is something I've been told (and seen) multiple times. We'll see it next week-- there are Olympic medallists returning to uni next wee#no one cares: the phrase is 'America makes celebrities out of their sportspeople'; we do not. Replace sportspeople with any public professi#Canada does not care for press about their musicians. The only reason NME sold here was because Anglophilia not because of music journalism#anyway; personal
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
anyway though. how crazy is it that the ambulance got called on me by a staff member and i was experiencing impending doom and panicking and i couldnt feel parts of my body and i wanted to cry so bad because i thought i was dying but i maintained it. until my little sister arrived and i burst into tears sobbing because because i ruined mothers day and she (my mother) was texting me angrily because she got called to go to the hospital for me and that it was my fault and then when the emts(?) arrived she kept interruping me describing what happened trying to tell them in very poor french that it was all my fault because i wasnt eating (i had actually eaten for the first time in days that day because i felt bad because she was angry at me because i wasnt eating) and she bitched the whole time and i was still trying not to fold over bawling because i ruined her day and transit and week and mothers day. we've all been there though right
#emergency broadcast system#we're celebrating french mothers day because she was out of the house american mothers day and refused to acknowledge me#when i tried to wish her a happy one and offer a card :-)#and then complained nobody cared anyway so why was i trying (<- what she said) LOL#and today i have two finals in three days time but here i am still having the boys make cards and clean their room as a surprise and making#dinner with enough leftovers to where shes able to have some when she comes home without having to worry about it#perhaps one day i will be cared the fraction i care for! in some way shape or form! however this is apparently not the location LMFAO
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
kicks rocks ..
#I honest to God don’t know how to speak to anyone on here ..#not even on here only I mean in general#it’s fine it’s fine I’m ok on my lonesome IT IS OK !#<- convincing myself. I’m such a liar tho#why do I have to reach out first 24/7 like am I not interesting enough ??#I actually feel sick this is genuinely sickening.#SO beyond sickening.#like I swear I don’t complain 24/7 ?? but like when the only thing that happens to u is negative and ur only surrounded by negativity no#matter what positive thing you try what else do I have#I don’t understand why has it been my whole life I have to pander and give give give 24/7 to even be considered a distant friend#I always used to get ppl gifts I always made gifts too and used to get ppl snacks and try to be overly empathetic#in fact a girl said I’m better than her psychologists#and now I bring my coworkers snacks too all the time and delivered the sandwiches my mum made for them#I feel stupid. stupid and used. and pathetic.#I know for a fact I’d be thrown away so quick if I didn’t do those things. and I do them bc I care for the person I’m not actively like#oh I’ll do this so they like me no .. I do that bc I genuinely adore the person but I’m not stupid ..#ik when it’s like ppl are only there bc they just tolerate me or they like what I can give#but I want to take only for once .. just once. Ik I’ll hate taking and whenever someone offers I blatantly refuse always#but it’s the thought .. the thought means the entire world and beyond to me#it just all bottles down to the fact I am insanely replaceable and forgettable and not noticeable. that’s about it.#I’m not back. and yea that’s a stupid thing to even put as a note bc there is zero chance anyone even noticed lol 😭 ! but yea ..#sigh I privated practically my whole blog again yay#fnsoalsm the reason I say coworkers instead of friends (bc we are actually super close so I should be calling them friends but ..) is bc I#refuse to call anyone my friend anymore. I just#give up. I’m so tired .. so so tired of these surface level lies I don’t think I’ll ever have friends and that is ok.#anyways on a positive note I was watching arcane and words cannot describe how much jinx means to me. actually they can give you an idea ..#she is actually soooo adorable to me and my heart hurts for her too sobsss#her and I are getting married fr LOOLLL (cover your ears Kaveh)#Ik for a fact she’s gonna get screwed over in season two I haven’t rlly watched it yet tho but I’ve seen spoilers
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
I swear why are half the things i like/fandoms im in made of mostly younger people while the other half are mostly older people? what are the zoggin odds with that?
How it feels being 20 in a fandom with a bunch of 30-40 somethings.
VS how it feels being 20 in a fandom with a bunch of 14-17 somethings.
like am do i just have extremely odd luck with things i like or is this just what being 20 is like?
#I go browse homestuck twitter and find out an artist I like is turning 16. I go to warhammer twitter and see a meme poster I enjoy is almost#three times my age.#like how do you get a person to somehow feel too old to be in a one fandom yet too young to be in the another?#i know this sounds stupid but it happens every time i like something#world of warcraft has people who have been playing this game for as long as i have been alive#despite aging with the game minecraft is primarily youngsters#team fortress 2 is somehow both too young and too old a fanbase#i've long since reconciled with the fact pretty much everything i like is over a decade old but why cant i just like something with a ->#similar age base? like it would be nice to interact with people that like similar things i like on a consistent basis.#I don't want to buzz around my 2 friends ears trying to not talk too much about my interests. Don't get me wrong I love those two gits but-#its not like i can complain about those childish gits who kept blocking the good fishing nodes in world of warcraft#I cant share my homestuck art and make references to characters that they don't know#I like making references! references make up roughly 1/3rd my jokes! Heck they make up my zogging dialogue too!#HECK I SAY ZOG AND GIT BECAUSE I AM A BLOODY STUPID MIMIC! I'M NOT EVEN BRITISH I LIVE IN MASSACHUSETTS!#YET EVERY TIME I GET A NEW “main interest” OR WHATEVER I END UP TAKING IN ZOGGIN SPEECH PATTERNS FROM THE DANG THINGS!#I ONCE MUTTERED “merde” WHEN THINGS WENT WRONG FOR LIKE OVER A YEAR BECAUSE SPY SAID IT AND ONLY STOPPED WHEN MY BILINGUAL AND FRENCH TAKIN#FATHER AND BROTHER RESPECTIVELY TOLD ME IT MEANT SHIT#I SAY “SLAPS ME ON THE KNEE” AND “SUCKS ON ICE” BECAUSE OF A MAIN INTEREST!#MY POSTURE GOT BETTER SOLELY BECAUSE I DID NOTHING BUT LEVEL A ZANDALARI HUNTER UNTIL LEVEL 120.#WHEN LAUGHING A MODERATE AMOUNT I DO THE /LOL ORC EMOTE. WHEN CHUCKLING I PUT MY HAND ON MY MOUTH LIKE SHIVER FROM SPLATOON BLOODY 3!!!#I HAVE BEEN UNINTENTIONALLY MIMICKING THINGS I LIKE FOR YEARS! I BOB MY HEAD AND WALK DIGITIGRADE BECAUSE I HEARD BIRDS/DINOSAURS DO IT TO-#BALANCE WHEN WALKING. AND THE ONLY REASON I SUCKED AT RUNNING WAS BECAUSE WHEN I WAS YOUNGER I WATCHED A SCENE OF ICE AGE WHERE SID WAS WAL#ING AND MIMICKED HOW HE WALKED FOOT -> FOOT INSTEAD OF HEEL -> TOE HEEL -> TOE#AND NOW I GUESS I'M JUST WAITING FOR WHAT ILL GET FROM HOMESTUCK HUH#ugh if you can't tell this is a midnight brainrot post. i may be awake and on my computer but this still has the energy of that kind of pos#saturday warhammer and the following wendys browsing for ya folks.#midnight brainrot#Man i needed to get those off my chest#not like anyone reads these midnight brainrot posts anyways#oh yeah gotta tag art and paint.net so i can easily find these drawings later if i need them
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
how and why is there discourse about whether or not certain queer identities exist/if people should be allowed(???) to use them. why is "people know their own identity better than you ever could, and they're the only one who get a say on what they are" such a tough concept to grasp
i think if you find yourself offended by the label someone uses (especially if they're a stranger) or think it invalidates your own, it's a good idea to look inside yourself and question why that may be. more often than not, it's a result of insecurity or uncertainty of your own identity (or many other things, but i won't make a whole list here). whatever reason it is, until you resolve it, you shouldn't take it out on people for having an identity you don't understand
many have said it before but it's worth saying over and over. infighting only helps our oppressors. conservatives don't care if you're a cis gay or a xenogender aegosexual aplatonic lesbian, they hate all of us either way. trying to fit in by going for people who are easier targets for them isn't gonna help you, it'll just alienate you from your own community, and you're never gonna please them. the momentary rush you get from hearing you're not like "one of /those/ gay people" is not worth it and is gonna do more harm in the long run, i assure you
also, it is important to me to say this, but having some less than nice kneejerk reaction caused by confusion about an identity you don't understand doesn't mean you're a bad person or anything. as long as you aren't mean to that person, and you take a second to think smth along the lines of "wait a minute, this isn't any of my business" after having said reaction, you're good 👍 a lot of reflexive reactions we have to things are ingrained into us simply by. well. living in a society 🤡 and you're not terrible for having those thoughts. it's your actions that matter, and your second thought (the "wait, why did i just think that?") is more defining of your actual character and morals than your reflex. i know that having thoughts like this, even tho they're unwanted, can very easily make one spiral, so it's important to me that whoever needs to hear this knows this doesn't make you a bad person 🙏 you're good, keep taking actions to be good, accept other people even if you don't understand them, and you're on the right track :)
#i considered adding that last part in the tags but i figured it'll be too long for that 😭#i noticed i'm posting a lot of rants lately. sorry. but i do wanna make sure no one's actually feeling bad over them#if i complain about something that you do or call it mean and such. that doesn't make you a bad person#you can always work to change and grow 👍 it's not easy but it starts with smaller steps than you'd expect#and now i just switched to a whole other topic from my original point. oops#i do firmly believe that any discourse about someone's identity is dumb as fuck#seeing it in poll blogs always makes me 😐😬 like how is it any business for any of us. why is this up for debate#if a person says they're queer then they are. they don't need to pass some test or go through initiation to be accepted#if they feel comfortable with a certain word that's awesome. why does it matter to *you* which word they use#'they're only using this microlabel to feel special' so? is there anything wrong with that?#'this label contradicts [insert other identity that falls under the same umbrella]' ok. but does that hurt anyone in any way#a lot of identities can even be self contradictory. does it matter tho? does it affect anyone in any way?#'they might realize that label is wrong later' again. what's the harm in that.#i don't blame anyone for these thoughts bc like. this is how cishets view a lot of the even more common labels#so you're basically taught to think this way from day one. that doesn't mean you need to stick to that thought process#you might have these reflexes forever no matter how hard you try. but you'll get quicker about moving on from them#but you do have to try. you do have to realize that other people's identities aren't about you#anyway. this post feels like batting at a hornets nest. really hope i don't get some bad faith readers here lol#(i noticed a lot of places one could apply bad faith but like it's 3:30 am i'm too tired to add this many disclaimer.#so i'm gonna trust you to not jump to conclusions and to approach this in good faith okay? mwah 🖤)#also my whole ramble abt morality (in the tags too) is relevant to. any topic really#i may just make a separate post about it really. .....tomorrow tho.
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
There's nothing wrong with people having their dearest most specialest blorbo be Eric ztd it is unironically good for the ecosystem and I always love seeing the different perspectives from other fans but what I am here today to ask is why is no one like that about Mira. whatever happened to feminism.
#every categorically insane man in this series has their dedicated fans and every popular character also has a bunch of red flags so like#to be fair no one's too crazy about Lotus or Alice either hm like people either outright dislike them conceptually because of their designs#or you know just have an appreciation for them as characters but not quite focusing on them much at all#like me#and like are the tropes that make up her character problematic? yeah! that didn't stop y'all from liking Saito a whole lot#now he's better woven into the narrative of the game he's in but then my point's back to Eric lol#like it is just fucking ludicrous the amount of stuff in the whole Series not to mention the game Alone that she's responsible for#but it does feel disconnected (being responsible for the Kurashiki's parents deaths)#frustrating (being responsible for injecting Phi whith Rad-6)#and overall just kinda glossed over? (beheading Junpei and killing off D-Team that one time because she was in cahoots with Zero)#so like I get why people wouldn't like her she's a bad plot device but THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING#THAT'S NOT REALLY STOPPING ANYONE and it's not even like people are very vocal about hating her either#at most I've seen it be lumped in with some major complains about the game like as a whole#the way we find out so early she's a serial killer it's kinda shocking but not really? it ends up as just kinda ridiculous and underwhelming#imo that's the whole game but again even when it comes to people who Do Like this game#anyways free to reblog I Do wanna talk about this but I am absolutely Not putting this in the tag lmao could you imagine#like is the trope of having one big booba female character per game and for it to be a Defining Characteristic kinda not great? yeah#but also like shrug#we've let Uchikosh get away with worse
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
I frequently feel completely isolated no matter how much I talk to people. So that's fun
#sorry if anyone sees these im tired of using my personal discord servet to vent. i always spiral too much#anyways i have an idea for a good poem to write for class because of recent events#ughhhh idk i just wish i wasnt so annoying about asking if i can open ip to people#or if someone would just ask if i was okay. i mean actually id probably lie i am not actually good at being open.#but like hey idk it feels nice to feel like people genuinely want to know#ughhhhfhfhf i do this to myself sometimes JSHSJSKDJDJD#welp its just how life goes. i feel lonely all the time and i soldier on#surely helping the next person will make me feel better! nope. surely helping yhis next person will make me feel better! nope. surely-#tgats me. thats what i sound like#yeah idk it feels like everyone is going through something worse than me so itd be a moral failing on my part#to ask them if i could just like. feel bad. noticeably#not even talk about it just look down and out of it for a day#yknow i emailed one of my teachers asking permission to go by a new preferred name#this is at like. a massive very queer and trans art school.#and i asked him permission to do this#and i was joking with my friends about how pathetic i sounded in it#and one of them patted me on the head and said “there there buddy” like very jokingly#but i almost cried because thats the first time in so long someone has like. really tried to comfort me#or shown me much physical affection#my mom gives me hugs and stuff but thats always about her. i dont blame her shes got a lot of stuff going on#but idk its really selfish of me but i just wanna have people see me and feel bad for me and it be about my pain for a little while#ill get over it im just being a teenager but shit god fucking damnit#i just want a break from feeling like my world is falling apart#then getting some footing#then it falling apart again#okay i feel a bit better now better stop the complain train JDJDJSKSJD#hey why do i never hear that it rhymes and everything thays so good#damn i gotta use that more#welp weve reached our stop sorry if anyone ever read thjs. hope you have a nice day tho lol
2 notes
·
View notes
Note
If you don't mind me asking, do you read fanfiction? Either for Top Gun or other fandoms you're in?
Yes! Not for Top Gun though. if you follow me at all you know how truly tapped out of the fandom i am. my typical fandom experience is as follows: for 99% of fandoms i am a consoomer and never a poaster. for 1% of fandoms (TG included) i am a poaster and not a consoomer. I don’t consume any TG fanworks besides my own. Which is why, if you’re asking yourself, why does compacflt act like theirs is the only right interpretation, it’s because mine is the only interpretation im ever exposed to lol. i do really feel bad about not being more connected to the fandom—but i think it’s just a writing thing, i don’t want to be unduly influenced by others’ work. maybe once i stop writing i can enjoy what other people have done. but also i know the second i stop writing my very specific interpretation im not gonna be interested in top gun anymore because it’s those issues i find interesting, so…
i havent been reading much FF lately cause i don’t really have any active fandoms now that succession is over. need to find me some new IP. but when I do read ff i have exorbitantly high standards so i read very little anyway lol
#compacflt is going through her annoying arc#why am i interested in top gun? cause im interested in my own writing lol#it’s very selfish. i apologize for that.#i am just poasting & not really engaging. sorry.#i do feel very isolated in this fandom sometimes but that’s entirely my own doing so don’t ever let me get away with complaining about it#no idea if i am contributing to the broader conversation in any way (because i refuse to look)#so just want to thank everyone who interacts with me ❤️ im just some guy with some thoughts#the village loon yelling on a street corner about ‘top gun conservatism’ ‘us navy homoerotic homophobia’ etc#none of those words are in the bible#so thanks for reading anyway.#always such a privilege to hear from you guys.#not top gun
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
Scream cry AND wail sounding off in my head lol still alive but SOOOOOO tired and there's still half an hour of transit left 😭😭😭😭😭😭
#i would love for someone to pick me up for this potluck because im the only one taking the bus#and they all have cars. but alas no one has answered my call for help#aighjfjfhfhfhfjfjfj immmmm so tireddddd i have been up since 6 and have worked about 10 hours i am. tired!!!!#also why are we meeting in a whole nother city 😭😭😭😭#anyway i organised this potluck lol why am i complaining#IM COMPLAINING BECAUSE I WANTED THIS TO BE AN INDOOR EVENT IM ECHUASTRD AND OVKERDTUMILATED#AND ITS A BLOODY PICNIC BECAUSE THE ONLY INTROVERT AND HOMEBODY IN THIS FRIEND GROUP WAS OUTVOTED#I dont resent THAT but i just want to be HOME#preferably with TEA AND A BOOK IM SO TIRED !!!!!!!!#anyway im ok lol it has just been a reaaaaally long and taxing day and the weeked and following week will be Worse
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
Some of those doctors make hating oat milk their entire personality. I hate them. Cannot pretend to find them funny or like i give a shit. Fucking pretentious assholes
#also my colleague (the girl i had my shift with) is the exact opposite of me in all aspects. asked me if I'd ever worked in customer service#because i couldn't care less about being fake friendly to assholes and don't care if they like the service or not#like bitch those people don't have any other choice but drink our fucking coffee it's not like I'm competing with anyone#or like they pay us in any way. i get paid for doing the dumb work i have to do not for stroking some dumb ass doctors' egos#they come out of their rooms once an hour to get coffee and we have the cups on the table and i wouldn't even Think of#HANDING them the cups and smiling sweetly at them and asking 'coffee? tea?? :))'#I'll just assume these grown adults will get their stupid coffee or tea when they want some. it's not like they don't know where it is#(and i AM friendly and smile when someone is coming in our direction but why the fuck do you need to get so disgustingly friendly with them#if someone held up a cup asking if i.want some coffee I'd leave immediately even if i came just for coffee. it's creepy)#anyway. she's nice. I'm not.#there's normal people who will get their coffee and maybe ask if the milk in the little jug is cow milk to which I'll happily reply 'yes#:)'. then there's the other people who see the oat milk and make it clear they are the most insufferable people on the planet#(and i pity their patients so much. not much to choose from i guess but if i had that as a doctor I'd happily just die)#like everyone who took oatmilk could do it without making a fuss about the cow milk on the table. the cow milk lovers could never#'the oat milk is in front of the actual milk. this is unacceptable. i hate such healthy bullshit' lol okay#'OAT milk?? I'll leave this to the horses! THANK GOD you have actual milk!'#my favorite was the one who really took personal offense with its sheer presence. as if it had killed half of his patients lmao#'we had 50 patients with xyz problem. ALL of them drink oat milk. they cannot see the connection. it's really unhealthy'#at this point i just said i didn't care and stopped paying attention and he started complaining to his doctor colleague about how#oat milk is advertised to be healthy and how it's actually the opposite and i just find that very funny compared to the first comment#from that one guy who doesn't like such healthy bullshit. you guys need to find a consensus on the oatmilk issue i think. no one takes you#seriously if you contradict yourself like this. also i couldn't care less about the healthiness of the milk alternative of my choice. bitch.#next week I'll end up killing someone. i hope they all die from their cow milk. (but not the ones who took cow milk and didn't say anything#about the oat milk. they can continue living as they didn't annoy me)#void screams#some of these doctors were actually quite nice (most of them even). one even brought an applicant to us telling her to get some coffee#(which we are not allowed to give to applicants. but i don't care. I'd rather they get something than some of the asshole jury members#who hate oat milk (which is not the issue. the issue is them making it everybody else's issue that they don't like oat milk))
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#misc#negativity ahead#have you ever been jealous of your own work#im sitting here and staring at nonlinear absolution- a fic i wrote when i barely understood mk lore#and im thinking to myself i will never write another thing that people love this much ever again#its not even that great of a fic but people ate it up and like while i absolutely love how excited people were about it#i guess i kinda feel sad??? because i dont know how i am ever going to top it?#generally i write for very niche things anyway whether it be niche fandoms or niche ships so like im very used to little engagement#hence why i never cared about numbers#but then nonlinear absolution happened and it got well over 2000 hits?? over 100 kudos??? comments on every single chapter???#and i guess it kinda spoiled the way i view my own writing#god this sounds so dumb lol it sounds like im complaining that i wrote a fic that was too successful#i promise thats not it 😭 its just that the standard has been raised in a way i dont know how to reconcile#to be deleted
2 notes
·
View notes