#see also: most of life is very small
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my most unpopular + controversial spec bio opinion is that the square cube law isnt all that hard to follow. stop making your creatures be as big as possible all the time. its far more effective and puts the size into far sharper contrast if you actually can compare them to things which you interact with on a regular basis and its far easier to fully utilize and understand every square inch of said creature if youre not trying to challenge Every Giant Land Vertebrate for size.
#all the care guide says is 'biomass'#writing a single good bear-sized beastie will be far more effective than a tyrannosaur-sized one and im not sorry#see also: most of life is very small#yes humans are megafauna and the second largest extant primate#yes we are absurdly gigantic in terms of most of life#i feel like people fundamentally misunderstand how highly specialized Being Big as a niche is#and then try to chronically overapply it
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shirahama-sensei reminded me she has a thing for the teacher from pokemon s/v so i randomly went off on an au where qifrey is the professor. etc
#witch hat tag#orufrey#the first image is qifrey dressed as that guy. i'm glad she has an inexplicable attachment to some dorky pokemon man like i do#someone was like 'wouldn't it make more sense for deanreldea to be the champion' .... well no. not in my world .#it maps onto magic skill. champions aren't like the Rulers of the land they're just the most skilled at this thing#oru as a burnt out champion who's gently encouraging a kid like coco to reach him one day means a lot to me. i like pokemon narratives#agott went shiny hunting for the same thing coco had but cooler - just to impress her. she really is a pokemon rival type girl#pushing myself to the limit to prove my worth to you - to get to the summit first so i'm waiting for you..#and then realising it wasn't just to be strong - i realised i started wanting to see your smile. i wanted you to have fun.#i think coco would defeat agott at the end of victory road and then defeat oru & i'll probably draw one last thing abt that at least..#the image is very cinematic..the dialogue and music in my mind..I WANT TO FACE ORU!!!!!!!!!!#the super cool insanely powerful awesome champion is the spouse of my professor and he gave me advice at the beginning...no way....#btw the elite four would be the sages which is perfect (and maybe easthies as the first guy?) evil Team Brimhats#coustas as their renegade gladion-type figure. the gym leaders would be like sun/moon and s/v combined#travelling around facing the best students from different classes - so jujy and eunie etc.#i've barely thought about 'teams' or anything bc i care amore about the narrative side of things always lol#but idk. tetia with a swirlix - eunie would be ghost type boy - riche with small things but also a ceruledge or a steelix something massiv#and brushbug would have a final form which is really long like an eastern dragon- fluffy and with wings like a fairy. It's beautiful to me#well anyway *tries to move on to the rest of life now the brief obsession has passed*#obviously oru would be fire-type tho and qifrey would be water-type and they set off together and traded their starters etc.....it goes on
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Okay so I've heard this said a bunch of times and I'm gonna admit I thought like that too for a while but no, Gi-hun did not win the games because he was lucky. A lot of people think that's how he won because he never killed anybody but that's really not the point. Gi-hun won the games because a) he's smart and is able to look at things from a different angle, b) because he is a good and kind person who also believes in others and c) because of the goodness and care get got back from other people.
In the first game he survived because Ali saved him and that wasn't luck, that was Ali being a good person and helping somebody not get killed. Ali could've not caught him, let him die, he didn't even know Gi-hun at all at that point and he put himself in more danger too by having to hold on to a person while standing completely still but he still saved Gi-hun because Ali is a good person.
In the Dalgona game he quite literally Was Not Lucky. He decided to go with the umbrella which is the worst shape to pick and he probably would have died if he hadn't looked at the game in a different way and decided to change his strategy. Gi-hun is smart. He is also optimistic and so he tried something new and found a different way to beat that game.
In the third game he survived because he was smart and kind enough to listen to Il-nam. The other people in their group dismissed him as just an old man speaking but Gi-hun didn't and that way they had a good strategy to beat the other team. The same goes for him listening to Sang-woo's idea of running three steps and then stopping, which ultimately was what saved them. His group also chose him as their leader (who, as Il-nam said, needs to not seem weak or loose hope because then the whole team is doomed). His team trusted in him and his optimism and they were right to do so.
In the marbles game he won because he was once again kind and decided to team up with Il-nam and also because in the end Il-nam decided to "sacrifice himself" for Gi-hun because he showed him kindness before. Yes Il-nam didn't actually die but he also knew that Gi-hun had cheated and still let him continue on to the next game, probably because Gi-hun had been good and kind and caring towards him before, even though he really didn't have to be. Gi-hun also didn't know this but by teaming up with Il-nam he inadvertently ensured that Il-nam had a lot more fun in the games than he would have had, had everybody just ignored to "old, fragile man". Gi-hun was good to Il-nam throughout all the games and it ended up saving him in the marbles game.
In the fifth game it's only some small moments as Gi-hun isn't really involved in the game because he's the last number but still it wasn't just luck. First of all he was kind enough to give the number 1 to the player that asked him for it. Yes, that number was bad but he didn't know that and had he been selfish enough to say no to that other player he wouldn't have survived. Being the last to play in any game can end up being bad for you, still he decided to give up the number he picked because the other player asked him to. Secondly he also survived that game because Sae-byeok was kind enough to remind him of which glass tile to step on after he had forgotten which one it was. It's only small but she didn't have to tell him and still she did. Sae-byeok btw is also good to him because before that he was good to her and protected her (even though he was angry at her at first) and that way he was able to gain her trust.
Lastly he won the Squid Game because Gi-hun was kind to Sang-woo and because Sang-woo deep down was still a good person. There were probably many reasons as to why Sang-woo decided to kill himself in the end but part of it, I'm sure, was also because Gi-hun was a good friend to him. I mean Gi-hun was even willing to give up all the money and go back home with nothing gained if it meant that Sang-woo didn't have to die and would be able to come home with him. Gi-hun deserved that win and that money and in the end Sang-woo knew that. He also knew that Gi-hun would make sure to take care of Sang-woo's mother and that he wouldn't just take all the money for himself because Sang-woo knew that Gi-hun is a good person. (Gi-hun technically also won the Squid Game because he was good at it which is also him being smart)
So in conclusion and I hope y'all haven't stopped reading yet: Gi-hun didn't win the games because he was lucky. He didn't just sit around doing nothing and won anyways. He won because he was smart but even more importantly he won because of the kindness and goodness that exists in humans and that is especially present in him. He won because he had empathy, because people trusted him, because he got back from them what he gave to them first. He never killed anyone and we can clearly see that he Could Never kill anyone in those games but that's not his weakness. Just because he didn't let himself get corrupted and turned into what the games wanted him to turn into doesn't mean he won because of luck. Him not playing by those subtle, hidden rules that are made to force him to be bad, to not care about others and to give up his kindness actually means he was better than the games. He won because he didn't let them turn him into a monster. They tried really hard and they failed and that's how he won!! But also on top of that he also won because he isn't the only good person in this show. He also won because other people helped him, were kind to him and gave a shit about him. Each and every person that helped Gi-hun didn't have to do that. They all could have not helped him, Ali could have not caught him, Sae-byeok could have not told him which one was the correct glass tile, hell, she could have Lied to him about it and the only difference it would have made for the other players would have been them being one more dead person closer to winning all that money. But that's really not how humans are and act which is why all these people helped Gi-hun, helped each other in small or big ways and in the end his own kindness and the kindness that exists in other people is what lead to Gi-hun winning. That's not luck. That humans being good
#people underestimate my man so much and he's literally the main character#gosh this post is so long i hope people even read it fully#man (gn) i was never able to just write out essays on some random topic for school#but when it's about my favorite show i can write some long ass analysis post on the goodness in humans shown in a series about death games#or really anything to do with any show or movie i love#like#it's mostly in the small details which are much more subtle and unnoticed than the bad things some characters do#but also#it's because that isn't normal#somebody like deoksu pushing people to their deaths in the glass bridge game is much more uncommon than somebody like saebyeok reminding you#which tile is the right one to step on#of course we notice that big bad thing happening more because it's not normal it's not what we see every day#but somebody helping you out somebody being kind that somebody maybe even being someone you don't know at all#we see that every day#every day we go out into the world and help each other survive and sometimes it's in big ways but even if it's just small things#we see that every day everywhere in the world because in the end that's what people are like#people aren't mean for no reason or actively plan on how to take you down#(well some people are but those people are the exception)#instead most people will either just let you live your life but very often also help you and care and be good#anyways i feel like i'm getting off topic but yeah#that's how gihun won#because humanity is good and he represents the best of humanity#as in kindness goodness care and sometimes even sacrificing your own comfort to save somebody else#that is who gihun is and that is ultimately what helped him survive#lea's random thoughts#squid game#squid game analysis#seong gi hun#seong gihun#cho sang woo
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din djarin, age 10: clone wars refugee child
boba fett, age 11: in federal prison for destroying an entire venator while trying to kill mace windu
#star wars#din djarin#boba fett#redbean talks#meanwhile jango; age 14: the actual mand'alor#very funny to realize that din and boba are almost the same age#when you look at the difference in what they were doing for most of the clone wars#din at age ten was a small frightened child hiding from super battle droids behind a space dumpster(?)#boba at age ten was jangos copilot/getaway driver for jedi-hunting missions (and also an equally small child)#then three years later was a full blown crime boss and involved in human trafficking#i really want to see more of the mundane conversations about raising grogu#like among the mandos there's#din (children of the watch hardcore mando): i must teach my small son to shoot#boba (literally-lifelong bounty hunter raised in child soldier central): do you want recommendations for good starting blasters#bo katan: i asked the armorer to make a custom set of knives too btw#the armorer (already made armor for small son): dont you think he needs a flametrhower for his birthday#and then the Associates#they've got ig11 (trigger happy assassin droid); fennec (experienced bounty hunter who fought cad bane at age early-20s?)#krrsantan (crazy gladiator probably-madclaw); koska (tackled boba as an introduction); axe (stabbed paz over a game of chess)#and then. there is Luke.#imagine everyone pondering over how to modify a disruptor rifle to fit very small arms#(because boba's absolutely going to spoil his small green nephew)#and luke just in the background like 'maybe we should. not? give the preschooler a deadly weapon? this is not safe?'#din: eh he's smart he'll be fine#luke; fearing for his life: it's not him im worried about-
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I personally like Thunder's prosthetic. Explained it to my friend (who does use a mobility device, a cane and wheelchair, and listens to me rant and infodump about BB) and they agreed, it's important to know that not every person needs what someone wants to give them. It's another example of "bad ableist person does a thing that hurts a disabled person because they are bad and ableist".
Clear Sky got Jagged Peak killed and would have killed Sunlit Frost! He would absolutely force his disabled son to be "normal" and present it like a privilege. "I wouldn't do this for anyone else, it's special, why don't you want to be helped?"
Thunder Storm should toss it in Clear Sky's face. (I would say toss it into the river but we do not pollute waterways in this house)
Thank you for telling me this, and tell your friend I'm thanking them too! If they have anything else to add please forward what they have to say
Since BB!DOTC tackles some of the heaviest topics in the entire series because its canon equivalent is so dark, I think very carefully about what I do here and how I show it. I take feedback on its sensitive aspects very seriously. If I'm understanding the criticism properly, it's that I should avoid stigmatizing prosthetics by making sure Thunder Storm's not the only one with it-- which he's not! And I'll add even more.
I don't want to avoid something only because it's uncomfortable if the topic is important, and my portrayal is respectful. Ableism IS uncomfortable! There are some situations where a prosthetic is not wanted! I think the rejection of this particular one is both a good opportunity to show a type of ableism and ALSO is very fitting for the characters.
In BB!Clear Sky's mind, the villain, he's fixing an old mistake. He can't admit that he got Jagged Peak killed or take REAL accountability for it (though he will, occasionally, apologize insincerely), but deep in his bones, he knows what he did was cruel. He'll never tell anyone this because he doesn't really cognate it himself, but Thunder Storm NEEDS to take his gift.
If Thunder doesn't take it, it blows a hole in his newest story. You see, throwing Jagged Peak out was All That Could Have Been Done back then. It was a Tragedy and he simply Made A Hard Choice. He regrets it very much, But You Have To Understand.
But now? Now? Well, behold. Look at what he's accomplished since the tragic death of his little brother. His cats are well-fed, cared for, and stable enough to make such incredible advancements. If only Jagged Peak had been able to hold on longer, if only he could be here now, I could fix him.
Just like I can (MAKE YOU JUST LIKE ME) fix you.
"Everything I've ever done is for Jagged Peak. For Fluttering Wing. For you." Thunder Sky is SPECIAL, but if he rejects any gift, tries to turn down the "privileges" offered to him, in an instant that becomes ungratefulness and arrogance. He both forces him to be special, and then leverages it against him if it's rejected. "Spoiled brat, doesn't appreciate what I've worked so hard to give him."
It all goes back to him and his own guilt. He can NEVER be wrong. He can't accept his family doesn't have to be "normal" or reflect his own ability. He won't see himself as a bully, let alone a murderer. It was never about his son's comfort or finding out what Thunder Storm wants or needs, it was about his own ego.
...All that said I'm still taking feedback if there's anything else I should keep in mind, or if anyone has a counter point, especially if you also have experience here.
(In the interest of having a link trail for posterity, here's the critique/call for feedback this is in response to)
#ALSO also I will take suggestions on other characters who should have prosthetics#Sunlit makes sense and it will make a really nice character moment later for him to have one built#There's also an amputee in RiverClan few people talk about called Stonestream#I can give him one and bump him up into a bigger character. In BB he is the sibling of Willowshine#BB!DOTC#better bones au#Also just as a side note... I love writing BB!Skystar. My ire for the character comes from his redemption arc so I feel like I get to--#--write the character I WANTED to see#Same with Bramble in other BB arcs#cw ableism#tw ableism#ableism#They're fascinating in that they always have to see themselves as the victim or the hero#They believe every lie they tell.#If you ever catch them in a contradiction they will still try to find some way to turn it on you and YOUR lack of understanding.#Interestingly both of them are ableist. Sky's is just more obvious because he's LOUDLY bigoted.#But BB!Bramble is *notably* less close to Jay for a very sad and very subtle reason.#Jay just doesn't serve his ego like the others do until much later in his life.#unfortunately most bigotry is like that.#the type you have a hard time calling out because it's a deniable bias. the constant gaslighting of being part of a marginalized group#Maybe I need to address the criticism by adding a character with a prosthetic to THIS arc even earlier#Problem is that like... Thunder's small merc group is already full of disabled characters and their THING is forming in response to ableism#OH maybe I'll put someone in the Forest Cat group which is lead by Slash?#I need to finish that last book and then gather up all the cats for sorting into allegiances
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while i do think the idea of shadow struggling with computers is funny i also dont agree with the idea that hes completely technologically illiterate . like yeah he just recently woke up in the modern day after a 50 year nap which would be a very sudden and major change but like . the space colony ark had to be super technologically advanced for the time (or at least advanced for the time by real world standards who knows whats going on in the sonic universe) to be able to exist at all let alone for the people on it to be able to do things like create shadow. and he also was raised by a genius scientist and canonically got some level of education on the ark . surely he knows at least a little bit about computers from living in that sort of environment
#and this is going into headcanon land a bit but i also imagine the technology the average mobian uses#is different from what the average human uses . like for example its very uncommon for sonic characters to be shown using phones#so i feel like most mobians probably dont use them unless they live in more human populated parts of the world#(i especially cant see sonic in particular having a phone. at most he has a communicator made by tails#that only a very small handful of specific people. or maybe even just tails and no one else. have access to)#and the reason i bring that up is because shadow has exclusively interacted with humans for most of his life#and now he knows a lot of mobians now that hes living on earth . maybe that has something to do with it too
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2024 reads / storygraph
The Teller of Small Fortunes
lighthearted fantasy adventure
follows an immigrant fortune teller who travels between villages telling small fortunes for people
when she runs into a (mostly reformed) thief and an an ex-mercenary searching for his lost daughter, she ends up traveling with them in the hopes she can help, along with a baker they meet along the way,
they encounter various magical creatures and adventurous situations, and eventually she has to face her past
no romance
#The Teller of Small Fortunes#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#this was okay#to be honest I didn’t get very attached to any of the characters - I found most of them a bit one dimensional.#(I kept forgetting the cat even existed - why keep mentioning the magical cat in the promo if it’s barely there!!!)#And not feeling much for the characters meant I struggled to feel much about everything else about the story honestly#The exploration of being diaspora in a foreign country & experiences of racism & her relationship with her mother was probably the most#interesting to me.#I always give cozy fantasy a chance but honestly I need it to be deeply introspective or maybe like really funny#it’s just a bit too light for me? (other than the racism and xenophobia - I’m glad to see more of that in this space)#It’s just I think not deeply enough for me - and combined with not feeling attached to the characters I just wasn’t feeling it#Also one of the reasons I picked this up was because I was seeing people say it has an asexual MC and let me just say-#it has a very vaguely AROace CODED mc#If you’re looking for it there’s a few lines of implications but it’s not super clear and also any mention is romance related - aro! not ac#There were SO many instances that would have been an opportunity to bring up aro/aceness and the choice to not do that#felt sightly strange to me?. however tdlr readers could be promoting this on it having no romance and focusing on#friendship/family instead of saying it has an ace MC which is….only there if you squint#no romance#***other than side characters being married and also:#There’s a minor subplot where a side character has a crush on another SC which is unrequited#and there’s a bit of a confrontation after which he backs off. but then it’s implied they might get together in the end :(#which was unnecessary! come on!#I always find fantasy characters inventing real life foods slightly odd but at least this one is more from the author’s culture#anyway. it's okay! just didn't really end up being for me
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men are so disappointing in so many ways i know i shouldn't expect most of them to be dignified humans but it's crazy. i need to get over this guy he's making my sense of self crumble even faster than it usually does. like he's just so unlike my usual type and i'm pretty convinced he's stupid and slutty and not discerning whatsoever. not to mention boring like i know even if i did have a chance with him he wouldn't Get Me at all so it's a bigger waste of time that usual and i'm actually pretty tired of men in general and definitely tired of parasocial relationships because they drive me insane for months typically. thankfully it's only been like 2 weeks if that at this point. idk. sigh. i know literally virtually nothing abt him as a person and ofc liking any public figure who you know nothing about is only setting yourself for heartbreak and disappointment to begin with bc you already know nothing is gonna come from it but. in a way it's almost addictive to become obsessed with someone and not be looked at with the same level of scrutiny. i don't think anyone in real life would ever try to get to know me as much as i try to get to know people who i'll never even meet. lmao! but that's the thing... idk... i have a lot of love in my heart and it consumes me and i reject my pride usually when i'm into someone. i want to know more... like VORACIOUSLY consuming anything with information about them involved simply because i think knowing someone is a very deep form of love but of course you can never truly know anyone. not completely. and that scares me i think which is why it's always probably been easier for me to never really TRY to be with anyone or have anything real. idk. this turned into me psychoanalyzing myself real quick but SOMEONE needs to bc i need to understand what the fuck is wrong w me.
#like i'm not gonna lie and say i do this every time i'm even vaguely interested in someone. most of the time i'm just like 'ooo hottie'#and then save a bunch of pics before either the shame gets to me or i just stop caring and move on. happens quite a bit more than my#obsessive episodes. the worst one was absolutely the fact that i was obsessed with jeremy for basically 3 years and spent two hating him#simply because i thought i was owed anything. honestly i think i was just very very insanely depressed. that's probably why those#obsessive periods even happen to begin with because i have felt so so horrible like soul ripped out horrible the past few weeks lmao#and i think i'm just a grasp for any light in the dark type person like it doesn't even necessarily mean anything the person is just someon#i attach significance to them when i do this shit but i know deep down that i'm owed nothing and that i truly expect nothing#it's just nice to have a distraction from my life. and dgmw that doesn't make me any less schizo about certain details and happenings#like i'll still think that 'oh they're only doing that because i'm into them' or 'they only went here because it was related to something i#was thinking about earlier' and whatever else. i know what i am. i don't claim to be anything else. and i know it puts people off.#and that i'm not likely to get any better if i keep doing it. if it's even possible for me to get better. but idk. it's interesting bc i've#thought more about what my life means to me and the kind of person i am and how my brain works and how everything affects me#more in the past few weeks than i seem to have in the last 5 years. i think i'm really getting better at accepting hard truths.#time spent by yourself is still time spent with the world.... and the more i think... even if it's hurtful... i'm growing and changing all#the time. i don't think if this was 4 years ago i would've even acknowledged the fact that i can't write off on This Guy's zionism#and other things about him that give me the ick (hate that phrase but whtevr) like him playing that gay hogwarts game and being a nepo baby#like bro you have trans friends and supposedly always 'look out for the small guy'. he's also never dated a fat girl despite his mom being#kind of a trailblazer for fat women in the entertainment industry. there's always rumors of him dating literally ever costar he's ever#worked with i guess simply because he seems like that kind of guy. and to be fair he does LMAO#honestly i don't know if i believe he's a bad person but i won't sign off on a guy i like being boring and stupid. that's just me#i'm sure ppl reading this who also don't Get Me are wondering why any of this even matters and the point is that it kind of doesn't lmao#but it's my life and i typically choose to care about people who will never even know i exist. unpopular girl instinct i suppose. maybe i'm#destined to be unloved or something but for now i wear fantasies like a blanket. maybe one day i won't need them anymore. but i def#do not need to center my romantic ideals on a guy i would be embarrassed to tell people i'm dating if i were actually dating him. rough#now just give me a month to get over it and finish the 2nd season of a show i like that he's in and i'll be rid of it hopefully. we'll see
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GOD I am not emotionally intelligent enough for the situation I currently find myself in
#would you ever tell a friend that you are interested in them#like very very deeply fond of and interested in them#and have been for like four years#but they have been with the same other person that entire time#and have given no indication of being unhappy in that relationship#so you just resign yourself to making sure your friendship outlasts your crush#but then you see them for the first time in a long time and there are like. vibes.#like they emphatically and repeatedly say how much they missed you#and allude to how much they trust you and how easy you are to be around#and spend like. a lot of time in your company. like most of the week you’re in the same place#and you know that saying something could potentially sour the friendship but also you feel like maybe they deserve to have all the info to#make whatever decision#and repeatedly find yourself wondering if they even know you like men#hypothetically#what would you do#my life#oh and they’re not just together w this person. they got engaged in the spring and recently moved cross country w them#theoretically#and again continue to refer to the future of this relationship#and the idea of participating in cheating makes you physically ill which is why you didn’t even tell anyone about this crush forever#and yet. and YET. there seem to be vibes. unless you’re imagining them. hypothetically#god I feel so awful about this and yet I know it’s like. the oldest human dilemma lol#to be clear the goal of telling them would not be to convince them to cheat it’s just on like the small off chance that they would. make#different choices. if they theoretically knew their teheoretical feelings were reciprocated. but also you’re not sure that’s what the feelin#feelings they have are
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Im 👀 at your Mondstadt having an underground area and I just want to bring up this idea in a fanfic I read (Windwheel Aster: Adored by the wind) where Mondstadt has secret underground passageway between them and Liyue for emergency use. Now im combining those ideas in my head of underground passageways beneath Old Mondstadt. Like some sort of dark souls crypt for those who perished (since its Really Hard to do a burial in the snow). You know how the wind brings Mondstadter's souldls home? Yeah what if thats not just a Venti thing but also existed during the time of Decarabian. (I can tie this into Istaroth but thats a whole nother paragraph)
DON't MIND ME HAVING SpeNT most of hte day reading that fic ahem
Crypts under Mondstadt...oh I love that idea it fits in mood-wise with the Actual Dead Guy under the statue, giving Mondstadt and ameno all the more ties to death and souls and imprisonment + yeah how do you deal with bodies when the ground is frozen hard and the city is micromanaged by the god. Why, if the bodies are getting in the way, why not remove them, help the souls pass on, and place the bodies neat and orderly filed away. Away from the people so they can focus on life instead of death, but each passed person can still be easily found in case they're needed. Besides, crypts are often under a church and Mondstadt is the nation most known for having a church....maybe not under Mondstadt's currentday church, but the people did use to 'bow' around the tall tower which houses a god....
But also........those Istaroth ties? 👀👀👀
#decarabiandivorce#@ hoyo pls insert a crypt under decarabian's tower now actually i want this plsplsplsplsplspls#ya know we get a lot about liyue's funeral practices. but I wanna know modnstadt's funeral practices#i dunno most of the other nations strike me as relatively constant? They've carried the same vibes before their archon became their archon#but mondstadt's past vs present seems so different#i see their funeral practices changing a ton between decarabian's rule and venti's era#decarabian strikes me as someone who wouldn't Get the human side of grief and moving on#and someone to do what needs to be done. methodolgically. organizes the information and remains. moves on#and expects the humans to move on too. death is a part of life and that's it#meanwhile venti's rule was born from the god taking on the form of a dead friend. very emotional response to death#and that's how the era started#a lot of people are dead and the new god is also grieving and they are now allowed to process the death#the ground is now soft enough to bury the bodies#i have a headcanon about the bard being seen less as a leader as the rebellion and more as a representative of the common person#and the idea of this common person who fell with the tower — reflected by all the other people who fell — being honored by the new god#i wonder how many people knew that venti took the form of his friend. seems like it would be decently common knowledge at the time#maybe he started a tradition of carrying a small reminant of someone close who passes as a method of honor and morning#genshin talk
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oh my god like. the stark contrast between mob’s inner self — saying that everyone around him held him back, everyone was afraid of him, everyone treated him differently, everyone only saw him as something to use and that he was never accepted by anyone at any point; that he would never be accepted for who he really internally feels he is — vs all of mob’s friends and family repeatedly saying “we aren’t scared of you because we know you and we love you, this is just a part of you that we can live with and accept,”— not to mention reigen fully admitting that he was using mob and apologizing for it, as well as telling mob that the only person who really needs to accept mob is himself..? It’s just. It’s so good man
#cal.txt#mp100#mob psycho 100#also i think the other side of Reigen’s beliefs towards psychic powers is heavily underrated#no they don’t make you special or entitled to anything but they also don’t make you weird or bad or abnormal#it’s even better through an autistic lens too .. like wow#not to say mp100 is direct disability representation but i feel like most disability rep in media has this tendency or pattern#of framing disability as a discardable part of someone’s life/identity as a way to feign acceptance of it#and they spend more time trying to convince someone that they aren’t Really different#which like i guess the sentiment is there or whatever#but it’s the same as saying you don’t see color as a way to express your non-racism#but mp100 is like. ‘you’re very different from other people but you’re not any less acceptable or less normal for it’#and you don’t have to rely on the acceptance of others to make your difference seem okay either#godddddd it’s so special to me I can’t believe it’s over forever#also the fact that everyone was also willing to take on whatever burden or challenge mob went through as part of his powers/being different#everything in your life is a part of you and we love it and we love you so it’s a part of us too#lord im coming up#GOD ITS SOOOOO#yeah im dead#Reigen could’ve fixed jack but that’s not worth a post I fear#very small overlap of interests#autism coded#autistic characters#<- went back just for those tags sorry
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I love these books so much but holy shit does carthak’s worldbuilding drive me crazy
#like okay. I can ignore the funky parts of worldbuilding for most of it because most of it is in Tortall and the bits you see#are like really COOL and add a lot of depth other vaguely real life vaguely Europe fantasy worlds don’t do#big fan of everything happening past tortall#but carthak and the copper isles drive me batshit#Carthak is worse for me because I studied the Middle East/swana/west Asia whatever you wanna call those areas#plus a decent amount of Central Asia#and very specifically the linguistic and social development#and it’s bad enough that all of Africa is kinda mixed in with it#but none of it makes logical sense to my brain because it’s all thrown together#I’m trying to write a fic set in Carthak and keep getting distracted and making it even longer because I’m trying to make the worldbuilding#make logical sense#like I’m basing it vaguely on the Islamic empire at its largest extent which is what I think it’s supposed to be#with the bazhir as an alandalus equivalent that got separated from the empire then conquered#like fine. that works.#but having the Nile equivalent in the west is really fucking with me#also the implication that china is in the west hwat do you mean china is in the west but central asia is in the east#I just wanted to write a toxic ot3 getting together/breaking up fic about how Ozorne is both Varice and Arram’s freedom and prison okay#now it has an entire year of plot#either the distances in this world are really really fucking small or really fucking massive#and/or they have fascinating levels of ship based cultural exchange that tortall has managed to avoid entirely#also fuck basing ozorne on ozzy Osborne I’m making him look like my old classmate#I’ve started making worldbuilding decisions based on which accent I want people to have
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Apologies for the bummer, too personal post, but just because I need to vent (if that's even the right word here) -
What is it about the death of immediate family members that feels so unreal? My stepfather died unexpectedly this weekend, and even though I have fully internalised that on an intellectual level, on an emotional level it hasn't hit me at all yet. Same happened when my grandma died, it felt like it took my heart months to actually catch up to what happened.
#admittedly i was very close to my grandma for most of my life#while my feelings towards my stepfather have been quite negative ever since I entered my teens#so i'm not even sure if there will ever be that sense of feelings catching up in this case#but there's still something unreal/unbalancing about someone who has been a presence in your life for most of it just not existing anymore#the only thing that does feel real is the effect his death has had on my sister and especially my mum#who now has to deal with the horrible yet banal bureaucratic practicalities that come with sorting out someone's death#since i live in a different country than my family the only horrible practicality that hit me so far is the unexpected cost of#buying plane tickets in the middle of summer#which is such a trivial unimportant thing in the grand scale of things but also not something that i can just not worry about at all#thankfully it's just a matter of me being a bit more mindful of my spending over the next month or so#and not a full-on 'i'll need to skip meals' type of situation#thank god for small mercies#personal#death#sorry for the ramble#just needed to get this off my chest#also apologies in advance if you'll see even more vampire posting/reblogging from me over the next few days#i wasn't kidding when i said iwtv is helping to keep me sane
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Sometimes I still think about how sweet it was when that anon checked on me last year when I was posting overly dark jokes. Thank you whoever you were, that was kind
#i am so much better now but last year was a bad one for me#there was a time in the fall where i literally couldn't get out of bed just because it felt pointless#anyway my mom also forced me to make a doctors appointment and luckily my doctor is super kind and got me on a good medication#but it also was just from stuff like losing my job struggling in school and going through the hurricane etc#im just so glad that i was pushed through that by concerned folks because im enjoying life much better now and that wasnt that long ago#anyway if you're struggling badly right now pls know its not hopeless#reach out for the help youre given and try to see yourself as worth it to fight for#take it little steps at a time#celebrate the small victories like having a shower or taking a walk or answering a call#the best thing for me other than the doctor was just finding ways to be around other people more#instead of feeling defeated i had to think of ways i could fix the loneliness that was affecting me so much#i had to get proactive like i started volunteering and started a book club etc#also i just made myself be very honest with the friends i already had about my struggles and it helps with feeling closer to them#and less alone in it all#because its not that uncommon to have those kinds of struggles and it helps other people open up about their own or just know how you are#the hardest things to do were the most rewarding things in the end#volunteering gave me a reason to get out of the house meeting new people and trying new things and feeling good about myself and#i had to remind myself that i was able to offer things of value and that other people like having me around actually#like the book club is something my friend group looks forward to so much and made new friends through and i started that!#even though i was nervous about it and didnt know if theyd like it at all#other people need you just as much as you need them and thats the truth bby#p
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I love all of these goofy product photos where the water bottle is extremely obviously just photoshopped onto a stock image of someone pretending to hold something or whatever.. very convincing..
#the last one where the water bottle is like nearly the size of the woman's entire leg ghbjbjhh#ALSO I know.. gross.. nasty.. amazon.. I was only looking there because I was trying to find an exact replica of an old water bottle#I bought like 6 years ago in a store and I just wanted another one of those and it seemed like the only place the old manufacturer#still sold was through amazon but.. alas.. I think they just don't make them anymore. so I have abandoned my hunt#I didn't actually buy anything. but I did get distracted clicking through product images for a few of them#it's bizarre how like............... idk.. WHY is this done??? Isn't this offputting to basically ANY potential customer?? or do people#not look at every photo/read the entire page/all product information before buying??#all of these are from like front page ''top sellers'' or whatever like........... how does this not hurt the brand????#If the company can't even bother to take a single photo of a real life person using their real life product then... that to me#is kind of red flaggy..?? even if you're an indie start up small business with hardly any funds.. still#A real photo of the product you are selling in a real actual non-photo shopped environment does not seem that inacessible#Maybe it's because everyone does everything on phones now?? So it's harder to see the pictures when they're smaller?#Kind of the same thing with ai art and also hair color photoshops lol.. On my full comptuer screen it is SOOO easy to spot ai art#like IMMEDIATELy from the little tells and ways certain details morph into each other etc. I dont even mean obvious dalle mini stuff but#like the Fancy High Quality Photorealistic AI art is still pretty blatant 98% of the time if you know what to look for. But I still catch#people sharing it a lot like 'omg where can I buy this pair of shoes!! :O <3' .. erm you cannot.. that is the most balatantly fake looking#pair of shoes I have seen in my life hhjbj.. the heels are both different heights. there's a different number of straps on each one. etc.#AND that phase back before colored hair was Mainstream and people would post photos like 'omg going to bring this to the salon!! dream hair#and it's like.. you can LITERALLY see the parts where it's 'colored outside of the lines' and is so clearly just a person with blond hair#that someone drew over with a tint brush or something not even very neatly. etc. etc. ANYWAY.. Maybe with phones it's harder to tell these#things?? To me so much of it is instantly recognizable and it's suprising to me that people either don't notice or don't care and will#interact with it anyway by buying the product or acting like some ai art fake furniture is real or etc. etc. ..hewwoo#Aslo sidenote - I think I've become soo cynical and tired of constantly being advertised to that I literally cannot shop without getting#exhausted. I do not see how marketing is anything but obnoxious and transparent. Every item description having stuff like ''Our company is#commited to bringing you the highest quality water products! we set out with a mission to bring high quality products to people all over#the world and we believe in spreading health and happiness and'' just like SHUT THE HELL UP!! youre a fucking company#you don't ''beleive'' in anything you are here to sell a product. stop trying to talk like you're my bff who cares deeply about my health#or something just tell me the materials and product specifications of your stupid fucking water bottle and move on. Idont need to hear your#whole bullshit spiel about what ~your company stands for~ that is SO much MORE offputting. you make me want to buy the item LESS..#longing for the type of ads from my 1800s magazines that are just like 'this product is good. please buy it. okay thank you much. bye'
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i don't trust anyone that had a good time in middle school. it's a hellish first encounter of what's on the other side of childhood and designed to be a period of adjustment; it's not supposed to be comfortable. if you enjoyed being in seventh grade something is fundamentally wrong with you, and i'm like an animal sensing another animal has rabies or something. don't come any closer or i'll attack.
#in seventh grade i had no friends and was obsessed with learning this fictional language that was created for the myst game universe#they had all the grammar and stuff online and i contacted the guy who invented the language and asked him specific questions#and he answered me every time so i had this whole binder of language lessons straight from him#to this day i hold that guy close to my heart and keep up with his work bc he really came thru for me when i needed someone#he listened at a time when i felt very unheard and made me feel like i mattered and that was important even if it was just about a dumb#game bc it wasn't about that it was about someone telling me i'm not alone after all and there are other people like me out there#and that helped me see beyond the very small world of seventh grade into a greater future that contained possibilities for happiness#and it also made me realize that the internet could help me find and connect with people over even the most obscure fascinations#which was huge for me bc i had mostly been using the internet to print sailor moon pictures and spam chat rooms with#shakespeare monologues bc kids are annoying on the internet and i was weird but i was still a kid#anyway first date question: how do you feel about the seventh grade experience? this reveals so much about a person so quickly#i'm brilliant follow me for more excellent life advice i post unedited as it occurs to me in real time#personal#cyan worlds
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