#saying i wasnt is untrue

[repl1c4nt]

why does evert ffxvi related interview leave me less interested uummmmmmmmmm its weird dragging random minigame mechs for not having any narrative purpose when blitzball is litrly the only form of entertainment spira haz after a literal apocalypse its very important to the people and is literally the backdrop of tidus entire development but whatevr..... plus fishing in ffxv is literally fishing for food. sure it doesnt affect the story but food affects your stats its literally a gsmeplay mech its so stupid to phrase "ffxvi will be dark and hve little emotional break" as "every other ff game is bad for having minigames that are fun" idk its weird it all came off as pretentioud and like actively resentful of ff's legacy as being something new and better but whateverrrrrrrrrrr none of it matters and ff7rebirth is arguably the more important release

[ambersky0319]

OH YEAH WILD AND UNPLEASANT CUSTOMER INTERACTION THIS AFTERNOON (early in my shift too)

below cut cause uh. tw racism

so first words outta this assholes mouth are to comment on my "pretty blue eyes". i dont say anything, just ask what he would like. he tells me one of the salads, and as im grabbing the stuff, he says "you probably go to university right? you look like a university girl"

i say yeah, cause i have no reason to keep that to myself. he says "probably a doctor or lawyer, huh?" and im like "nope, writer" as im beginning to put his salad into a container

and then this bitch says "what do you think of the arabs in the university higher ups?"

ALARM BELLS FUCKIN RING IN MY HEAD

"i dont really care," i say. because i dont, good for them.

he continues, saying that the arabs and syrians are gonna replace us and steal our jobs and at this point im just tryna very quickly finish up this interaction cause i am this 👌 close to saying something that would probably get me fired or purposely provoke him which while could have been fun. would mean having to interact with him longer than necessary. so i tell him im not allowed to talk about these things at work

to which he says "well i can" and then something unintelligible about his relationship to the government? idk i was tuning his ass out at this point, asked if he would be getting anything else, and as soon as he said no i escaped to the back to tell my managers wtf just happened

after this interaction too the blue eye comment made me EVEN MORE uncomfortable to think about

[itsalwaysdark]

anyways sry its not srs eventually ill get it together . and be a person again. one day

[caffeinatedopossum]

I just accidentally brought back a bunch of memories of stuff my mom used to say to me :')

[two-calicos-in-a-trenchcoat]

You know what im not done with this

Like im really not trying to come off as some chronically online gen-zer that gets easily offended or some shit

But fuck man just being older does not mean you always know more than someone younger than you especially in terms of knowledge about things that YOU DO NOT HAVE PERSONAL EXPERIENCE WITH

Like no, random cis person who has known very few trans people irl and only has the absolute elementary school level of knowledge of what transness is, you dont actually know more about being trans and what constitutes transphobia than the 26 year old trans person that you're arguing with

And them getting frustrated with you for defending saying transphobic shit and not listening when they calmly try to explain it to you does not make them overly sensitive

[beautiful-lively]

.

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

okay, look, im not going to comment on what i think about the neil gaiman situation more than this. anything else i have to say has been said. i just have one singular comment:

THIS WASNT PREDICTABLE

i am seeing SO many posts stating that this shouldve been "obvious" that all of his nice fan interactions were just creepy or that he wanted an "army of adoring fans". that there were soo many signs and ALL of his actions had creepy motives.

its genuinely fucking ABSURD, because absolutely NONE OF YOU are working from reality when you say this.

we live in a reality where sometimes, people do genuinely terrible awful things. and then, they go on to do actually good things, really nice things. and its completely impossible to know they ever did those bad things until you are told.

and when i say this im NOT defending him. i think he is a shitty person, and his nicer actions dont save him. he did something very fucked up, even if some details turn out to be untrue.

BUT it is a harmful way to view situations where disturbing info comes out like this, where the second you learn a person did something fucked up you turn an "evil" switch in your brain, and you think EVERYTHING theyve ever done is evil or evil motivated.

because it either breeds paranoia in you, or worse, complacency. you either walk around trying to find the secret Creep in every famous person, or assume every famous person you like could neverr do something wrong because their actions arent full of the Creep.

you couldnt have known, and you NEED to stop saying you did.

[relaxxattack]

can you rant abt hiveswap and how it changes the per-established alternian lore and not in a good way. i hold no stake in this topic but i love to hear about worldbuilding differences and people complaining

oh my god i would loveeee too. well first of all the obvious stuff with how they seem to think the beta trolls were the stereotypes for their caste (NOT TRUE... very very untrue but ESPECIALLY untrue with like. jadebloods goldbloods and purplebloods who seem to get this the worst somehow)

i hateeee how they made jades preppy THATS KANAYAS THING.. AND SHES EXPLICITLY *WEIRD* FOR THAT. they literally mention it like over 20 times how kanaya is sooooo weird for liking fashion and dressing well and then. oh no i guess every jade does that actually whoops sorry! ToT and god do i even need to go into the terrible prevalence of the idea that "jadebloods are typically/instinctively nurturing" when that is textually not the case?

goldbloods all having double horns is not that big of a deal tbh but its really funny to me that they made that assumption when sollux is like. actively called a mutant for most of the comic. "oh yeah hes mutated and weird and fucked up and some of his body parts are doubled (cue dick jokes here)". like that was a thing for sollux but they just decided to say "well actually. thats just how all goldbloods are"

most purplebloods having a "clowny aesthetic" is fine with me honestly since theres an actual Profession of being a subjuggalator and presumably lots of purples are going to be wanting to go into that? but alllll of them being full on juggalo cultists goes directly against canon. its like. the difference between american lawmaking and christianity. yes the separation of church and state is like nonexistent here. but just because american lawmaking is an enterprise controlled by christianity doesnt mean that All Politicians/Cops are automatically christian. and definitely not the same kind of christian?? there are probably agnostic clowns, or clowns who are only into cultism for the aesthetic. even reformist vs. orthodox clowns. they may all be upholding the same systemic white christian status quo, but they doesn't mean they all fit into that niche themselves. if that makes sense?

and of course i've already made a whole post about how i hate the idea that olivebloods are all feral little rogues, since that makes very little sense in canon.

i would really love to do that full stream of the hiveswap and friendsim games just. going through all of their alternian stuff and explaining my thoughts on it and how it relates to canon... i could go on and on about this stuff for ages and get into way more than just caste stereotypes. i think i would need to reread all of homestuck first to make sure i wasnt just pulling shit out of my ass and was truly studied up though, lmao

[strewwwberry]

About to do a Rant on shen Jiu coz yeah, so ⚠️trigger warnings⚠️for, you know, him lol

(Additional tw please read beforehand even if its just a skim)

I personalize a lot of my writing to the viewer/reader, if you are someone who tends to input yourself into writing, whether purposely or not, please be aware that it may get uncomfortable or too personal to you, be aware of what you can read through and what is uncomfortable or you simply don’t like, stay safe ♡

Also apologies in advance if I project at all through this.

Shen Jiu's story has got to be one of the most tragic I've read, and not just for his slavery, abandonmet, sexual and physical abuse and then extortion after "freedom", and on top of that the old tale of the abused become the abuser. No, not just that, but because he was willing, he was 110% willing to ignore his feelings, brush aside his abuse an torture, everything, if Yue Qinguen just told him why he wasn't there, just gave him a reason, hell not even a reason, a goddam excuse to why he wasn't there.

He would've, he may not have been a good person even after the fact, actually I'd bet that he wouldn't be a "good person" at all. But, I belive that at the very least, it would've calmed his heart ENOUGH to not repeat the cycle of abuse, even If not for any reason but yue qingyuan.

Even as an adult he was still a child inside wanting the comfort of someone he trusted more than anything, and to be reassured that he wasn't abandoned, that his qi-ge was just late.

And to make it worse, he was, yue qingyuan was simply late. He pushed to hard to quickly, refused to ask for help, refused to explain, got himself in a deadly situation, was late and continued to not explain himself but instead give a look of pity and a stupid sorry every single time as if that changes anything.

Now to go into that, that look of pity. I can literally feel in my soul how fucking cruel that was to have done to Shen qingqiu. Imagine you make it out alive through being sold into slavery, abused in all ways possible, had to fight your way out because your one and only wasnt able to, got basically kidnapped and then further used, escaped THAT, and finally made it to a sect where you see your one and only, hoping that no he couldn't have left me... Did he? No he didnt abandon you, there must be a reason. But nothing, just pathetic apologies constantly. He must've thought himself above me, I'll prove him wrong. You make it to be a head disciple on your way to be a Peak Lord, an impeccable position and a near impossible accomplishment for an ex slave, and still nothing, just pity.

Then you finally get to the top, your on your way to Ascension, already immortal despite being too old to even cultivate when you started and your qi-system (whatever it's called) is absolutely wrecked (miracle you can even cultivate, an insane improbability to have made at to a golden core and immortality). But still, even after all you've been through and persevered through, pity, pity for a man who made it. Pity for a man who went through hell and still fucking made it.

I'm just saying, I'd be mad too.

But no, it doesn't end, of course it doesn't.

Your anger reaches a point unmanageable, you refuse to explain, no one explained anything to you and they won't listen anyway! refuse to try because what good could it do? No one will believe me anyway what's the point? Only friends are brothel ladies, who you pay to be with you, you get called a pervert and a lecher for caring for these woman and that girl disciple of yours who you take pride and comfort in. Are you a pervert and a lecher? Is that true? Only you really know.

And then this bastard kid she just had to point out.

Shen Jiu, refused to acknowledge his REAL flaws and blamed everyone else for everything even when it truly does end up his fault. What. Is he just supposed to deny or admit anything? Of course not! Let them belive whatever the hell they want, I've always acted this way making me seem untrustworthy and because they're hypocrites they wont try to find out why anyway, and I'm always the victim.

Which he was for a long time.

But then he wasn't, not really no, still a victim or course, but right now, with his standing and power?

and then even though they were in the wrong, his refusal to try (understandable but still) was his own choice, his refusal to at least get along with them, not start fights, not ostracize and critisize in the form of snide commentary. No one made him did that, he was traumatized and a child, yes, so was it understandable? Of course! Was it still his own actions that even as an adult he refused to stop, let alone apologize for, even if not literally apologizing? Yes, yes it was.

And then a child. Whose had it rough. Maybe not (yet) as rough as you, but rough. And then to abuse that kid, torture and isolate that child become he was so lucky to have had a mother? A mother who, although still his mother, wasn't even blood? And because his eyes reflected that of a monster, his name reminding you of your abuser just like how your own now does to. hes too much like me, that look just can't be humane, he must be a monster. And you know what you were right he was a half demon child. But not even a demon deserved to be pushed into the abyss to die, no child not even a demon child deserved what you but him through.

That is not how that works. You hand him over to the water prison and figure it out, because the laws are fucked but at least that's something then just acting how you think is right even when you know its not. But no you had to, because what would they say, harboring a monster, you must be one to.

Then on top of all that, you swore to yourself that once you got your peak Lord name, you'd bury your past like you literally just spawned in the moment it's given. And then failed to bury it. Because life isn't that easy. But for once you just wish it was. You wanted to kill that child, so for the one that reminds you to much of yourself? You'll kill that one instead.

Shen jiu doesn't deserve excuses, hell he doesn't even want people to make excuses for him, not for himself and not from anyone else (except if that excuse Is qi-ge giving him so much as "I got caught up drinking my hella fancy tea, I dint mean to leave you there") .

But he was tragic.

He was human, so very human. A human playing the part of a trancendial being. A human boy in the appearance of someone untouchable and inconceivable.

Playing this act means no one can use nor abuse you.

Now, no one can hurt you,

Not anymore.

...

But they still did

[kropotkindersurprise]

I ngl worry that Mass Report Monday will be used as proof that leftists like us are nothing but dogmatic harassers no better than Prismatic but I also know that’s objectively untrue. I’m just worried about how someone with no context might view this.

I dont really care about what random people with no context think. Worrying about what clueless Liberals think has never done us any good.

Mass-reporting that neonazi blog last week worked pretty much immediately and it wasnt even actually organized, while me reporting them by myself led to tumblr saying a neo-nazi posting "jews are my enemy" was not against their Terms of Service. If it's effective, why care about what Liberals think?

[carpedzem]

hi

under the cut i want to talk a little bit, maybe overshare as well. ill try to keep it short (rereading nat here. i didnt). its a sad post, might make some of you angry but not for the reasons you think

i was staying away on purpose, but a few people asked about me so i wanted to let you know that hey, im lurking, im waiting to see what happens. maybe some things will change in the future but im putting it out here so its all in one place

i think i want to start with saying thank you again for sticking around, supporting my art and my thoughts and having discussions with me. i really opened up about myself and what I created here. im very anxious person and it influences my life on every level, so being heard, seeing people laughing at my jokes, loving my art has been so so important to me

about the situation, the gogcident if you will, i logged out as soon as i saw things going down and been getting updates though different source. and while situation is still on going and i dont know where it will go, as how it ends, theres two or three things im firm on that will always be true for me:

i really hate how believe all victims turns into believe everyone who speaks first, no matter what they say, no matter context, no matter proof. the first statement made in this case was untrue in a lot of important details and while i dont think caitis feeling are wrong or invalid i think her first statement made this situation into something it isnt. i think every victim should be heard but attacking everyone who was accused right away is not a solution

i do believe that everyone who was accused of anything has every right to defend themselves. the way its constantly taken away from dteam is not lost on me and its insane and upsetting

you can be traumatized by the events that werent in its core meant to be traumatizing. sometimes people act shitty and leave scars on you and sometimes you can do the same to other people

edited note bc i want this to be here as well: guilty until proven innocent is a crazy mindset and i cannot imagine situation that i would allow it. some idiots dont even realise how dangerous rhetoric that is. including accusers not being obligated to provide any proof of their claims

twt is the worst thing to deal with any discourse, misunderstanding or any delicate situation. i think no ones there cares for any victims period. i wish that place the worst

okay so what now. i havent decided yet. georges and dreams moves so far confirmed for me that no matter what happened it wasnt with malicious intentions. ill wait to see how this plays out and then ill decide about my next steps. one think i did for sure is i uninstalled twt from my phone (and that already bit my ass the moment dream started his space…) that part of fandom, both people who like (liked?) and hate dream is so damn self-destructive, toxic, manipulative and performative it wasnt worth it anymore. for here, i dont know yet. i dont hate dteam, i think this is very unfortunate and sad and complicated situation that left people very deeply hurt. and i wish it wasnt this way and im pretty sure dteam also wish that. but they cant change it and i cant change it even more

now this is something i dont really know how to tell you but let me try. i never mentioned this bc when i had those realizations, it was too late, everyone moved on and i felt stupid for dwelling on this. i feel stupid now, typing this. the thing is, drituation left me quite traumatized. fucking pathetic, i know. the sudden explosion of fandom left me really badly hurt. i lost a lot of people i genuinely believed to be friends with, and i miss them dearly. i felt, fuck it, still feel deeply betrayed by some of them. i dont want people guess who is who thats not the point, those people moved on long time ago. but that hurt has been really difficult to deal with, especially since realistically i know its quite stupid. crying over some people who were following me back for a few months? but i tried to let myself heal and grow love for this community again and i thought we will be okay. drituation felt like the end of the world but we got through it and I thought we are smarter. and well. im not trying to blame anyone or even a whole community, idk maybe i want to blame the universe for putting me here or society for working this way i dont know. but im hurting and i need to find a better way to deal with things going the wrong way. and it deeply upsets me but im afraid that i have to learn how to love you all less. and i honestly dont know yet what that means, how moving forward will look like. i dont have to make this decision now so i let myself stay away from social media for a while still and then go with presented situation the best i can. i dont try to make anyone responsible for my wellbeing i want to make this clear. im just trying to share my feelings and give you context for whatever happen in the nearest future. no matter what i need more healthy relationship not even with ccs but with community itself (and if you see me rebloging hazbin hotel fanarts. spare me...)

in this place i do want to state that no matter what i dont think dteam are bad people. im not closing myself at possibility of participating in the fandom, probably less though things i mentioned earlier. but if any of those things make you uncomfortable in any way, feel free to unfollow/softblock

im leaving my askbox open if anyone has anything to say, add, or idk, scream at me. not sure if i answer any tho. also if i delete this post in the next 10 minutes out of embarrassment then well, haha

on the final note i want once again thank you all for supporting me when i needed help for my cat. you all did something amazing, something i will never forget and i wish to hug everyone of you in person. thank you

see you around. one day. maybe tomorrow maybe in 10 days. idk

and if you are moving on in different direction, if we ever meet again, dont be a stranger

[sarcastictissy]

I have a lot of lovely asks and messages from people that I'm not able to respond to yet, but I just want to genuinely thank all of you for it ❤️ I was worried I was letting people down, but I'm so very thankful for everyone that reassured me otherwise. I will respond to you all. I'm not ignoring any of you, I promise.

Now onto something more serious. This is tagged as qsmp neg because I'm about to get really really angry with a certain part of this fandom.

Since Maxo unofficially confirmed qsmp is ending after the event, I've seen so many posts and reblogs along the lines of "the people upset because they had hope are in denial/ delusional/ crazy" or "the people thinking qsmp wasnt dead brought this upon themselves" which, basically, people are making fun of those who've had hope that the server will server. Now, don't get me wrong, we aren't exactly logical by having hope, and you're nit in the wrong for having a joke about people being "in denial" about the server closing.

That being said, the people blogging this only started doing it when Maxo unofficially confirmed its closure. So, technically there was still a small part of you that had hope, too, huh?

Not to mention, we are not in thr wrong for having hope or wanting to hold onto something that brought us so much joy, love, passion and creativity this past year. Leave us be. Let us be "in denial" or "delusional" or whatever you want to call us. It's fun over here. It's bright and positive and we all share the best memories of the past year. We don't WANT to look on the downside because it doesn't help us. It doesn't make sense to be consumed by all this negativity. It's very damaging to people's mental health if all they're seeing is "qsmp is dead" "quackity is cancelled" "all CCs hate qsmp" and other untrue statements.

As long as the fandom lives, qsmp lives. So why are you mocking us for seeing the qsmp in a positive and fun way? We're celebrating its life, not its death. This is a celebration, not a funeral.

I have had so many people message me, send asks, and tag me in posts to thank me for being positive about this situation even in the worst of times. And it's not that I'm saying "the admins are being mistreated? Oh well!" Because I'm not. What I'm doing and what I've done the past 3 or so months is remind people to take a breather, remind people to care for themselves and offer a place for them to vent to. I've shared my favourite moments of qsmp as a way to relive the best times whilst we go through the worst.

Can you not see that? Do you really think it's worth mocking me and others for?

If you genuinely believe I'm crazy or other insults because I see qsmp as a good thing, despite its faults, then please, unfollow me. Block me. Block the 'qsmp positivity' tag.

I will continue to spread hope about qsmp because I need it as much as others do. I owe myself to stay level headed and clear on qsmp because its done so much for me this past year. And so so many others see it the same way. I'm very grateful to be a place of positivity and safety during these trying times. I'm so thankful to everyone who has messaged me, sent me asks, followed me or even became my mutual because of this server.

I am so sorry for anyone that has been incredibly negative and doomposting excessively these past few months. It's very sad you felt the need to bring others down because you were sad too. But the there's a difference between being negative and actively ridiculing others for not being negative. And for those that have been doing the latter, stop. Stop trying to make us feel small for having hope for a server that has been our home for over a year.

If anyone feels like I'm being harsh, it's because I am.

[writingpuddle]

just had to say, i loved your tags on that post about the upperclassmen and how they treat kevin/andrew/neil. fandom tends to work on this "they're all assholes" beliefs, and it's not necessarily untrue. but i think people tend to forget just how unlikeable kevin and andrew are from the upperclassmens perspective. i think people also forget the upperclassmen didn't just blindly love neil. for all his faults, like you said, he was pretty chill. he was much easier to get along with and it helped massively that unlike kevin/andrew he actually wanted to make a connection with the upperclassmen.

im glad my tags resonated with you! i have this half-cooked thesis that maybe one day i'll get around to fleshing out about the difference between individual responsibility and collective responsibility that i always think about when i see this conversation pop up--something about how yes, we as a society have a responsibility to people who have been harmed to try and help them recover, but that responsibility doesnt actually apply to every individual person. in this case, the idea that wymack founded the foxes (an institution) in order to help people move forward and build a future doesnt mean that every individual involved in the foxes has to invest all their energy in that same goal. in fact its pretty wild to expect every beneficiary of a service to simultaneously provide it to those around them.

the institution has to be be fair, has to provide help independent of some arbitrary category of 'deserving' but individuals...dont have to do that. every fox signed on to escape their own nightmare, not to help fix the other foxes. the upperclassmen have no responsibility to reach out to kevin and andrew when they have been so hostile in return. wymack has to, because he made a commitment to doing so. the upperclassmen didnt.

and as you said--the question of why the upperclassmen were nicer to neil is straightforwardly answered by he wasnt mean to them. he was sometimes unnecessarily blunt or rude (if we got what we deserved we wouldnt be foxes) but he was also the one who gave them awed compliments when he first started playing with them. he was the one who said we can win this. he was the one who shut kevin up when he started to be negative.

he was easy to like. part of that was intentional on his part--not that he was intentionally being likeable, but he was trying to portray himself to be less antagonistic than he really is. he tells us quite explicitly that he is portraying 'neil' to be meeker than his natural instincts, so he hangs out with the upperclassmen and is mostly at least neutral in terms of social hangouts and when it comes to exy he is extremely positive. and despite his occasional snaps at the upperclassmen, he actually rarely lashes out when its not deserved. his temper is reserved for riko and people who support him. kevin and andrew lash out at the upperclassmen in their own ways, and avoid them in many other circumstances, for reasons that are often obscure without neils insider knowledge. it isnt morally wrong to like someone who is easier to be around.

'why are they nicer to neil' because neil was nicer to them. thats how human interaction works. doesnt mean andrew and kevin didnt deserve help--but the person to provide that was the person who made a commitment to do it, not the people who just happened to be--effectively--their coworkers.

to sum up: everyone deserves human decency from everyone, but not everyone deserves friendship from everyone.

i guess--i dont want to get too antagonistic about this myself, because i actually doubt that many people have super simplistic views on this topic, theres just the occasional oversimplified post that gains a bit of traction. but i do think theres also a very fascinating tendency for people to try and make aftg into a neat didactic story about reaching out to people to understand them because neil reached out to andrew and it worked (and arguably saved both of them). but aftg isnt didactic. its not a prescription for how to behave. its made up. in real life, if i met andrew and it wasnt my job to help him, i would avoid him like the plague. sorry. i love him as a fictional character and i love him because i know his story but holy fuck i would not spend a minute in his company if i didnt have to.

friendship isnt social work. emotions arent activism. the upperclassmen didnt owe andrew and kevin their sympathy or their time just because they were traumatized. you cant control peoples emotional reactions to how they are treated. kevin and andrew treated them badly. neil largely didnt. thems, as they say, the breaks.

[superm4ks]

charles didn’t have drs after overtaking 4 cars, it was lap 1. you’re entitled to your opinions, and i don’t even particularly disagree with it, but i find it odd that you don’t acknowledge that max getting 20 sec gap to p2 wasn’t also due to the safety car & red flag while charles’ lap 1 is being justified on the track change. idk just food for thoughts, i don’t think minimizing how good charles was in abu dhabi—not even his best race of the year—and saying it’s not comparable to max’s one when they gained the same number of place, even if under different circumstances, is particularly justified and incomparable

again, it’s not to fight with u, max’s drive in brazil was generational, no one is denying it

😐 Friend. U do understand ur fighting wid me on this. Ur on the defensive here and I have no idea why. I never said sharl gained his initial positions thru DRS no clue where u pulled that 1 from. I described that 1st lap as prolly sharls best of his career. Unsure why this isnt enough of an acknowledgment to u like I gotta prove something here. Thats the trend wid some of yall that ann0ys me. This weird ass insecurity when it comes to somebody like Leclerc, whose record is anything but. I made a reference to a reply from that same user, that Yas Marina doesnt favor overtaking from the back like Interlagos, which imo is untrue. I kinda live for circuit trivia so it was a nice chance to mention that '((in 2021)) Chicanes 5 and 6 were turned into a single wider hairpin, specifically to promote more overtaking, where interestingly enough sharl went outside 4 cars before entering DRS.' BEFORE entering the DRS literally means BEFORE entering the DRS straight. Thats it. I assumed people understood DRS wasnt enabled atp and I was just referring to the track characteristics.

Plenty of sharls charge to the podium during this race was made wid DRS bro believe it or not I think it takes absolutely nothing away from his performance. DRS seen as a clutch but some tracks like this 1 its a wobbly one. A driver has to be able to beat an opponent to a specific detection point not just thru the straight line sections but technical corners as well. There were plenty of other drivers who unlike sharl cud not make use of it like he did because they didnt manage their laps as well. Idk how u can read what I wrote before and say I 'minimized' Sharls Abu Dhabi drive. The op I addressed claimed Sharl 'stole' the best drive of the season from Max's Brazil. Thats not saying shit is 'comparable' and its not 'justifiable' no matter how u wanna look at it. Its laughable even. I wont hold back on that sorry. I think its a bonkers thing to say. Sharls Abu Dhabi was a great drive from an ever growing future threat to the standings, and u wanna etch his 1st lap into the fabric of history like sure. I think he taught some lessons in terms of managing the chaos around him to immediately execute a series of flawless overtakes and reestablish control of the pecking order wid sheer pace and ability in a single lap. But Max's drive in Brazil is not comparable to Abu Dhabi in any way shape or form because its not comparable to anything anybody else has ever done wid cold tires under pouring rain in this era of Formula 1. It exists outside of the average realm of racing. I feel like I'm repeating myself and its getting frustrating. Interlagos wasnt a good career drive, it was an historical individual effort by an all time great who turned unprecedented circumstances into an advantaged he carried to a title. We agree thats generational correct. So lets leave it at that.

[noclassnowitnosoul]

I was always like ''what do you mean flint is dead i saw him alive with thomas with my own two eyes'' and then ''i wanna believe he's alive i CHOOSE to believe'' but i was wrong i was so blind hes dead he is soooo dead there is no other way silver said ''i will stand here with you, for an hour, a day, a year while you find a way to accept this outcome so that we might leave here together for if not then i must end this another way'' and what else could flint possibly say if not Over My Dead Body and OFCOURSE silver would tell a soul wrenching beautiful story about how he ''unmade captain flint'' because why would he tell it if it WASNT a lie a story is true a story is untrue but flint is fucking dead there is no other way

[lucid-daydreaming-archive]

after taking time to ourselves, getting back to our job, and visiting some coping and healing skills for folks with bpd, we feel like it’s necessary to make this post.

this is not 100% daylin speaking, its both daylin and lampert. i, lampert, am acting as a filter or proof-reader of sorts to keep a logical, well-constructed message with facts.

it is not fair that we are being chased into silence and horrendously attacked by strangers on the internet because of what everyone has heard from ONE side of the situation. we are a human being too who deserves to have our side heard and be treated as someone who is hurt and suffering as well.

it also needs to be said that the majority of uno’s following base is teenagers, people 2-6 years younger than him. teenagers who have shown habits of parasocial ties to him, idolizing him because how can their favorite artist do anything wrong? the favoritism of his side in the situation solely because of his following needs to be addressed and honestly we believe he needs to take accountability for his power over the situation in that way.

because of the majority of the following base being children, it is not expected that those people hearing about this situation will have the emotional maturity level to understand the complexity of the situation, especially because it was a complex adult relationship. because uno is aware of his status online, there is no way he was not aware that the things he brought to light (that were vastly over exaggerated and a lot untrue) would be taken to the extremes by his following base of children ready to bully and attack anyone they see as bad. this is a manipulative perpetuation of cancel culture being used to target us for a failed relationship that did not need to be made public.

before anyone says anything about us venting online or anything like that, we need everyone to remember that the first person to make this public was nine, and the first person to initiate anything that would distort anyones view of the other was him. anything we did was in defense of ourselves because him simply answering an ask calling us manipulative invited an army in our ask box threatening us and and saying horrible things to us. when you go through what we went through, you will understand the amount of hysteria and desperation you go through to stop the lies and the threats.

the relationship nine and i had was complicated and adult. we were friends for three years, best friends for half of that time, and qpps for 7 months. multiple times it was communicated that we have bpd and all that comes with. i encourage everyone to do research on how bpd surfaces in people and how complicated it is to muffle the symptoms. this was understood between both parties, and multiple times he had said that he will always communicate if something is making him uncomfortable because he doesnt like dealing with things that make him uncomfortable, but that he would never leave us and would work with us through our healing. we had warned him of everything that we struggle with in extreme detail, and he had said he doesnt blame us for how we feel, and cared about us and liked us too much to let that ruin what we had.

this was not just some online relationship either. we had major roles in each other’s immediate real lives, visited each other multiple times, and saved up to move in together. we had plans to spend the rest of our lives together, move to europe, get married to get eu citizenship, get pets, etc. and this was talked about deeply and seriously and not just as a pipe dream or fantasy. it was entirely on him to communicate to us that he was not comfortable for that level of commitment after multiple conversations with mutual understanding defining what our relationship was. he lead us on, decided he wasnt cut out for it, left us, and used it as an opportunity to exploit his power over us and others to make himself look like a victim and a saint.

going back to our bpd, nine has grossly misrepresented the symptoms we showed. he claims that we guilt tripped him constantly, turned every situation around for us to be comforted, and had to be tiptoed around. this is all horribly exaggerated. any time he set a boundary with us or told us that we need to tone down our reactions to things, we fully listened to him and implemented it into our behaviors. there was no guilt tripping or forcing us to be comforted. yes, we did cry and feel bad when something we did made him feel not happy, but i think anyone else would also feel guilty if they did something that hurt someone they love and care about that they didnt mean with any harm.

we need to be explicit about this, not once EVER in our entire time knowing each other did we yell at him, hit him, throw things at him, or any other type of verbal/physical abuse.

there was no reason why he could not communicate to us if he at all felt too obligated to do things for me, because we made it explicitly clear that his happiness was payment enough. we never have and never will expect anything from him for anything we do for him. we loved and cared about him above all else and that still holds true. if our bpd and our autism are not excuses for why we were insecure and unstable, then his communication issues and avoidant attachment style are not excuses for why he held everything in until the last second.

we also want to highlight that throughout this entire falling out, he has not had a single conversation with me. before the falling out, we sent a message (that we will admit could have been worded differently but in the end it really was just us setting a very realistic boundary) and received no communication on his end whatsoever until he blocked us out of the blue and refused to speak to us until he called us 24 hours later and spoke AT us for barely two minutes, leaving out any and all details as to what the buildup to this was, and not giving us any chance to say our part. that is immature behavior. everyone wants to talk about our online freakout as being immature? then his immaturity in the situation needs to be taken into consideration as well.

his inability to hold a conversation with us about anything that bothers him despite us literally begging him for years to tell us is NOT our fault and we will not accept the fault of that. of course we never ever wanted him to feel hurt, manipulated, trapped, obligated, anything like that, and if he had communicated to us that he was feeling that way, we would have been so much more sensitive to our behavior, but we were under the impression FROM WHAT HE HAD ASSURED ME that everything was okay and that he would speak up if there were any issues.

we have been shunned, mocked, abandoned, and driven to homelessness because of his immature behavior. over a year of clawing tooth and nail to save up to move three states away into a house that HE wanted US to move to despite us suggesting a better alternative multiple times, and not one hint of him being uncomfortable with the idea of our closeness. not one hint of him being hesitant. multiple times we asked if he was absolutely sure he wanted US of all people to live with him and be that close to him despite our emotional instability issues and he assured us he wanted noone else and was willing to see it through with us. it is not fair to blame us when we were purposely led to believe we were not a problem for him.

it also needs to be said that nine has been caught blatantly lying about the source of our falling out to protect himself. we understand there may be legal repercussions on him if he speaks about the reason, but that does not give him the right to message our friends and fully and blatantly lie about the incident to downplay the severity. this is wrong and cruel behavior.

nine, if you end up seeing this, i (daylin) would really like to have at least one actual real conversation with you about this, because it is not fair that that opportunity was not presented. im aware that you feel hurt, but it is completely unfair and immature of you to just abandon the situation without communication. this is something that i will need years and maybe a lifetime of therapy to overcome the trauma of and its not something ill be forgiving you for no matter how much i still love and care about you. what you did to me was cruel and wrong and a horrible exploitation of your power and my mental illness. i hope you dont do this to anyone else.

if any of you you took the time to read this, thank you for making the mature decision to hear out both sides