#she also used to threaten to cut off my thumb

[caffeinatedopossum]

I just accidentally brought back a bunch of memories of stuff my mom used to say to me :')

[see-arcane]

You know the one good thing about being a pessimist?

It feels great to be proven wrong.

Bravo, Bobby Egg.

I was so happily surprised by this. This film went through a fantastic puberty between the leaked script and the screen. The main points to note:

-No, Ellen is not hot for Count Orlok. She and Thomas are 110% in love. There are even certain Harker-flavored quotes thrown in to prove as much. (Details under the cut.)

-Count Orlok is a terrifying bastard and a half. Significantly more imposing than classic Orlok’s spindly rigor mortis-stiff figure and only wearing a sliver of Dracula’s performative charm. He is a Devil-Death archetype playing a monster who operates in deceit and contracts to wring out what he wants. That and a lot of corpses.

-This film is so beautiful. No gothic touch is skipped.

In sum, I more than like this film. I love it. It isn’t perfect, because no film can be, but damn. I am so proud of this nightmare you made, Bobby Egg.

SPOILERS FOR Nosferatu (2024) BELOW

-Getting some cons out of the way. There are points where a few of the actors lean maybe a bit too heavy on the ham-and-cheese in their deliveries (I’ll not blame the kids, they’re very young, but yeesh. That’s some cartoon acting.)

Yes, the g-slur is still used; though while I wish it hadn’t appeared in Eggers’ script at all, it does make sense within the context of the setting, i.e. Thomas and the Innkeeper probably only having the one word they know, same as in Dracula. And yes, naked teenage girl-on-a-horse does happen for the vampire hunt scene. Whee.

-Now, an early pro: Eggers nixed the ‘hot teen girl tries to pickpocket Thomas’ bit, and the ‘land of phantoms and thieves’ line never happens. All that happens after Thomas wakes in the inn—post witnessing the vampire slaying in the local graveyard, mud on his shoes to prove it was real—is he discovers himself utterly alone. No people, no horse. Cue the long walk.

-Ellen doing the ‘Come to me,’ bit early on is her in adolescence. It’s revealed that her Weird Girl elements have been turned up to 11, tragic lonely past included (replete with dad threatening to send her to a madhouse), and her prayer was just for company. The psychic ping was picked up by Orlok, who took advantage, turning an isolated and desperate barely-more-than-a-kid’s wish into a ‘covenant.’

-Thomas was met not long after this, cue them being genuinely in love <3

-Knock Does Not Jerk Off On Screen. If he does, his back is to us, and Little Knock is covered with some occult tablet or suchlike while he’s doing his ritual business. Also he kills a guy in his cell. Using his teeth.

-Castle time! Thomas is greeted by a driverless carriage at a crossroads and seems to be hypnotized into stepping in. A lot of things Thomas does once in Orlok’s territory seem to very clearly have psychic puppet strings attached. That and some increasing terror on Thomas’ part. There is no warm Dracula-style welcome from Orlok when he arrives, but a terse and strange leading to the dinner table where paperwork is demanded.

- We get a glimpse of this version of the Count’s ego. Thomas calls him sir. Orlok demands Thomas address him as my lord. And then we get the bread cutting scene. Thomas’ thumb bleeds. Orlok get far too interested. His voice, a very guttural and rasping bass, turns into something closer to an animal trilling and growling. Thomas is paralyzed beside the fire; cut away as Orlok closes in.

-Ellen and Anna Harding have a bit of a Mina and Lucy deal going on at the beach. It’s sweet <3 (Prepare for pain </3)

 - Orlok starts getting tricky. He 1) borrows (steals) Ellen’s locket from Thomas and 2) Tricks Thomas into signing a contract to ‘sell’ Ellen/break their marriage via a strange contract in a language Thomas can’t read, with Orlok using the prop of some gold to imply that this is merely a document in ~his native language~ to complete the property sale. Thomas signs, less for the gold than to be gone from the castle and back to Ellen…only for Orlok to insist Thomas is not well. He must stay the night.

- No mind games here. Just Thomas pleading to leave and Orlok’s parting word being that he will stay, and that he will obey his orders.

-Orlok has already chomped Thomas on the tiddy as of last night. Next night, after Thomas almost lands a blow on him in the coffin—Orlok sleeps with his Orcock out in the box, by the way, alongside several rats—Orlok wills Thomas to unlock the door he shut between them. Cue Thomas being tranced onto the bed, pounced on, and basically dry-humped by Orlok as he drinks Thomas all but dry. Thomas is left that way, only to be woken by Orlok’s wolves—he has those too!—and go clambering out the window, dropping to the river below.

-Orlok makes Ellen’s life hell. Holy fuck. The 1838 quality ‘medicine’ definitely doesn’t help—corsets for correcting posture, draining blood because there’s too much in there, binding to the bedposts to stop sleepwalking, general drugging etc etc—but FUCK. Lily-Rose Depp did a great and terrible job of reproducing shaking fits and some of the faces and sounds she made had me thinking I might choke on my own tongue. And for all the sexually provocative poses/noises that happen, every time she comes out of it it’s clear that she hates this. It’s on par with psychic rape.

-The only times we see Ellen respond positively~ to Orlok’s dream-advances is when she’s telling Thomas about the ‘marrying Death’ dream where everyone died and she was deliriously happy and then the infamous trailer line about Thomas not being able to satisfy her as Orlok can~~~

Well guess what.

Guess fucking what.

That was Orlok leaning on her brain. The same way he did to Thomas when, eventually, after the nuns rescue him and pray the plague/vampirism out and he makes it home while half-dead, he lays in bed with Ellen and gets a panic attack combined with Orlok’s image being grafted over Ellen’s face…

…a reverse of the illusion Orlok gave him in the castle, with Thomas imagining it was Ellen on top of him instead. The effect terrifies Thomas all over again and he unwittingly tosses Ellen away, I can't breathe, get off of me, get off!

-Orlok does his murder snacking. Knock, who escaped, offers to find and kill Thomas to please the Count, literally on his hands and knees. Orlok calls him a dog and backhands him, insisting Ellen must be given, not stolen.

-Orlok has already visited Ellen by this time. He presses her to keep her deal with him. She tells him, flat out, I abhor you. In response, Orlok grabs her and chucks her like a ragdoll in a rage. He fumes, telling her he will give her three nights to pledge herself to him, and in the meantime he will start killing. (RIP to Anna and her little girls, the latter of whom ORLOK KILLS IN FRONT OF HER, EATING THEIR THROATS OUT AS SHE ENTERS THEIR ROOM.)

-Before all that, he spins bullshit about Thomas ~selling her to him for mere gold~. A technical truth that Ellen, mid-Orlok spell, spits back at Thomas amid a rage, along with details that are likewise based in only a granule of reality; but which Orlok did not mention in their scene together. Things like Thomas being weak and childish, that he ‘fell into Orlok’s arms like a fainting woman.’ Interesting choice of spin there, Orlok. But whatever.

This all culminates in what is either reality or a dream or a blend of both as Thomas makes sudden desperate love to her, Ellen weirdly heady about it, telling him yes yes yes they will show Orlok their love. Cue her snapping back to full cognizance (awake? dreaming?) as her eyes and mouth spurt blood in a vision. She collapses in fear and tears as Thomas holds her. AND THEN:

-Ellen. Drops. The I am unclean line. She wants Thomas away from her, she is not worthy, she puts him in danger.

-Thomas goes full Jonathan and clings to her. Nonsense. I love you. I love you. I love you.

-V i n d i c a t i o n

-Anyway.

-Dafoe-Von Franz-Van Helsing is a kooky science occultist. Finds a book that Knock had which fills the role of highlighting Orlok as Solomonari (hey, Scholomance shout out!) and Knock as a would-be beneficiary. Also includes the ‘maiden offers her body and blood to the monster to kill it via sunrise’ bit.

-While he reads this, he does NOT actually spell any of these details out to Ellen when they have their secret mini talk about tricking Thomas into hunting for the coffin with him and Sievers. He gives her a big ~you're the only one who can save us magic maiden martyr~ pep talk, but that's it. Meanwhile, Ellen was already preparing to offer herself to save Thomas and whoever’s left in Wisborg. Not the same kind of agency as the original, but still better than I was expecting.

-Harding, Thomas’ rich friend whose wife and children got drinked to death, dies of plague in the family tomb. They burn the bodies.

-In the ruin Orlok bought, cue the iron stake slamming down as they open the coffin..! But whoops. Knock’s in the box, not Orlok. Von Franz says Ellen offering herself is the only way~ Thomas doesn’t waste time throttling him, just makes a run for their home.

-Too late, of course. Orlok is there (with a very cool homage to the original stalking shadow silhouette routine) and Ellen welcomes him. While they are both naked in bed and it’s implied that they are/or intend to have sex, the bulk of the scene centers on Orlok taking Ellen’s blood from her breast. No clear shot of the Orcock on screen for that bit—Bobby Egg saved that pleasure for the Count flashing Thomas at the castle.

-Orlok’s death throes. Are so. Fucking. Cool. Definitely up there with one of the best vampiric demises I’ve ever seen on film. No spoilers there. You’ve got to see it.

-Heartbreak o’ Clock as Thomas bursts in just as Orlok has died and as Ellen is dying under him. There’s time for them to hold hands. And then she’s gone.

-We close on Von Franz popping up with some poetic soliloquy shit and a bunch of lilacs. The final beat is an overhead shot of Ellen, the Maiden, laying under the now-skeletal Orlok, as Death. Looks almost like a painting. Unlike the implication in the leaked script, she does not look happy/at peace. Simply asleep. The End.

-Other important notes:

1) Orlok has a little combover’s worth of hair on top and mighty and powerful ‘stache. Not Dracula-white, but it is there. Finally.

 2) The guy who plays Dr. Sievers has Alan Rickman’s voice. If he isn’t in opera, he should be.

3) I was too late to get a popcorn coffin box. I shall be in mourning until the New Year.

4) Bobby Egg if you can give me one more gift, let it be a deleted scene of Thomas beating Von Franz over the head with the iron stake, please and thank you <3

[my-castles-crumbling]

Jegulus - Based on a request by an anon! - trans!Regulus - 531 - tw: mild dysphoria

He never outright said anything when it happened. At least, not at first. Bringing it up brought stomach aches and chest pains, goosebumps and anxiety. He tried, of course, to pretend it didn’t happen. But avoiding reality didn’t make it change.

James was sweet about not talking about it. He never pushed. He only asked about anything close to the topic when he needed to know something, or when Regulus brought it up. But he was also smart, and noticed patterns. So by the fourth-or-so month of them dating, Regulus knew he knew, without having to say anything.

And then…he started just doing things. Leaving things. Carrying things with him.

“Can I take that for you, love?” he’d always offer, grabbing Regulus’s heavy books when he saw the younger boy wincing with cramps.

“Do you need some pain potion? Chocolate? A granola bar?” he’d say with a concerned voice when he saw Regulus, paler than usual, between classes.

“Did you get the note I left for you?” he’d ask so kindly, tracing Regulus’s jawline lovingly with his thumb and reminding him of the letter he’d found sitting on his pillow that morning after he’d changed.

“D’you need a massage or anything?” he’d offer so casually when Regulus nearly-collapsed in a chair in the library, aches threatening to consume him.

But it was not all of these things that made the whole experience better, somehow.

It was the first time he actually had to admit to James what was happening.

“I need to go back to my room,” he mumbled to his boyfriend one day as they sat in a quiet alcove of the castle. Regulus had been reading while James was happily playing with his hair.

“What?” James asked, looking put out. “I mean, of course, whatever you need, but why?”

Regulus bit at his lip, worryingly. He didn’t want to offend James and he knew he needed to acknowledge it at some point but it was so difficult..

“I have my period,” he mumbled, looking down as his entire stomach sank to the floor. “I need to go grab…y’know…period stuff.”

“Oh!” James said, nodding completely unabashedly. “No need, love! I have some. Do you need tampons or pads?”

Regulus blanched at the words, unable to form any response. “Do-what?”

“Oh,” James responded, looking nervous. “Do you…do you use something else? I asked Pandora a while back and she said to carry these, but if it’s changed, I can-”

Regulus cut him off, completely taken aback. “You asked Pandora what I use for my period?”

“Yeah,” James shrugged, like it was normal. “I wanted to be prepared. You know… in case you ever needed anything.”

His brain was empty. “Boys don’t carry those things,” Regulus said numbly, still shocked.

But James tilted his head to the side. “You do, baby. You’re a boy. And I’m dating you. Why shouldn’t I carry them, just in case?”

Regulus blinked, a soft ‘oh!’ falling from his lips. “I…thank you,” he murmured softly, reaching to grab one of the objects James offered him.

When he got to the bathroom, he allowed the tears to fall. But for the first time, he wasn’t crying just with sadness. There was happiness there, too.

[dooberific]

Hiiiiiii!! Can I ask for Harumasa x Reader angst? They are lovers and the reader is also Harumasa's colleague. Then the reader got commissioned(?) to fight hollows but she got stuck in that place and (idk if they went to fight hollows alone but for this request, they have like underlings(?) that would go with them for the mission) the people/fighters that the reader went with to the hollows came back heavily injured and Harumasa saw that the reader is not there with them. That is all hehe, it's up to you if you want the reader to be found or if they would be a hollow and Harumasa has to fight them knowing that that is the reader (I'm a sucker for angst)

Take your time doing this request and stay healthy, dear author!

Anon….who hurt you on Christmas? 😭. Hope this is close to what you were envisioning!

❝ 𝘚𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘏𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸 ❞

harumasa x afab!reader

genre: hurt no comfort, major character death

summary: it was supposed to be a routine mission, now he’s left to pick up the pieces

wc: 2.3k

There was a ring cut to your size. A thin and silver little band that lacked grandiose ornamentation. Diamonds and frills were never your thing after all, he could still see the little quirk in your lips at the memory of your colleagues rushing in with stones so large you thought them better fit for paperweights than proclamations of their belonging to another under the banner of love and marriage. “Practicality above all else,” you had claimed some months ago, thumbing at the simple band around your index finger. Your late mother’s ring.

He hoped you were the sentimental kind, your voice warbled over the line from the outpost in his ear as he smiled. “I’m just saying to be careful is all.” He asserted, fingers running aimlessly over the silver band resting in his palm. Your initials and his were cut into the inside. 

It was supposed to be your day off, the first you had taken in several months, but when H.A.N.D phoned you that they needed your section of the HSO to assemble for a rescue mission after a Defense Force team had vanished inside of Hollow Zero, well….you didn’t get the luxury of saying no, even if you were the Chief. 

“When am I not careful? Remember which one of us you’re talking to here, Haru.” You chided, the smile on your face so present he could hear it change the lilt of your voice. 

“Right, right, I’m talking to my beautiful, kind, intelligent and all around perfect girlfriend~” Though he hoped that title would be changing very soon, as he held the ring up to the light, the sun filtering through the window of your shared apartment dancing enticingly over its surface. 

You giggled in his ear, the sound warming him to the soul. He could practically see the way the corners of your eyes wrinkled in delight.  “That’s much better.”

The interference in the background of the call amplified, faint callings of your name cutting through the static. You sounded disappointed. “Sorry Haru, I gotta go.”

“It’s okay baby, duty calls. Just try to be home for dinner.”

“Wouldn’t miss a date night for the world, you better not peek in the closet while I’m gone! I want that dress to be a pleasant surprise later.” 

You fell quiet again as you pulled the receiver away from your mouth, yelling a response into the background. “They’re about to have an aneurysm over here,” you huffed. 

“I love you, Haru~”

“I love you too, (y/n)~”

That was a little after noon. It was now nearing midnight and the outpost was crawling with H.A.N.D uniforms and HSO stragglers. Countless outpost scientists shouldered through the crowd, chiming off readings and acting as if they just had a some great scientific breakthrough.

But you were still inside of Hollow Zero.

And H.A.N.D was beginning to withdraw. 

Even flashing his Section 6 badge failed to get him answers despite his insistence, earning little more than the shake of a head and a “this is above your paygrade, kid.”

They threatened to court martial  him if he kept accosting them. But they didn’t have you inside the Hollow like he did. The epitome of his happiness, the one he swore hung the moon and stars, his most constant companion, and the only one he could imagine waking up beside of until the day he expired. 

They didn’t have you, but they had the version of you that made their actions palatable. The “good soldier” and “valiant leader”. The slave to a public that didn’t care to know your name even as you shouldered their burdens as ceaselessly as atlas held the heavens. The one who signed up for a death job.

A chorus of shouts erupted, the flash of the medical units blazing to life under the white spotlights. 

Survivors.

He shouldered his way through the swell of the crowd with little regard for those he pushed aside. In a perfect world he would break from the crowd and see you standing there, a little worse for wear but alive and smiling like you just cheated the world. You would push past the medic teams as they chased you down to throw your arms around his neck, pressing a kiss to his lips as you gloated playfully.

“See? What’d I tell you? Safe and sound.” 

But you weren’t there. A cluster of five soldiers stumbled through the outer bounds of the Hollow—no, those weren’t soldiers, they were members of your faction carrying the torn uniforms of Defense Force operatives. They dripped with blood and grime, corruption marring their skin as they limped out, half-dragging others.

“Hey!” He yelled over the roar of the crowd as he grabbed one of them by the shoulder. His name badge shined under the lights. Kimura.

 “Where’s your chief?”

The man shoved his hand away, “Get off me man!”

He didn’t know where he got the strength as he grappled with Kimura before taking two fistfuls of his collar. “Where’s your fucking Chief? Where’s (y/n)?!” 

Multiple pairs of hands tore at his uniform from behind as they hauled him off, legs kicking as he wrestled against their pull.

“Where is she?”

“She’s stayed behind!” 

Kimura’s face was blank, his eyes distant and foggy as he stared at the ground. There were tears streaming down his face as he drew a ragged breath. “I’ve never seen so many ethereals, we were overran so quickly…Chief (l/n) and Deputy Chief Kato created a diversion to draw them away so we could get out.”

Kimura looked up with red rimmed eyes.

“I am so sorry.”

Hollow Zero had mutated. Or that was the story they were telling everyone now. The sensors at the outpost had registered a dramatic spike in etheric energy about 30 minutes after Section 2 had infiltrated, and by the next 20 the bangboo that accompanied you had stumbled out with fried circuits, the carrot it followed now expired as the interior of the hollow rearranged. 

It was supposed to be a standard recovery operation. You had done them hundreds of times in the past.

“I’m sorry, Asaba. My hands are tied.” The officer said with a shake of his head. “No one’s allowed in unless they are operating with their faction. You’re the only one from Section 6 here.”

He gripped his bow tighter. “Then I suggest you turn around and pretend you didn’t see me then.” 

It felt like an electric current thrummed under his skin as he breached the Hollow. He didn’t bother to call the proxy or wait for the association to form a new carrot. There was no point, even as desperately as he clinged to the idea of you being unharmed, alive, there was still a rotten crawl of doubt in the back of his mind that made the thought of wandering forever as an ethereal within Hollow Zero a more palatable choice than leaving here without you. 

He didn’t know how long he had wandered through the hollow, hair matted to his forehead from sweat as he cleared another broken wall, trying to survey as much of the warped landscape as he could. He doubled over, hands braced against his knees as he tried to catch his breath. He had overextended himself already, his chest constricted tightly as his breathing became shallow, a sharp ringing in his ears. He screwed his eyes shut, focusing on getting his lungs back under control.

In and out.

In and out.

There was a distant cry that met his ears, strangled and distorted, one that twisted his gut in an iron grip as his head shot up.

You.

He didn’t know what he hoped to find when he fumbled over the rubble in your direction. Finding you was the sole focus of his mind for the past few hours, the rush of adrenaline carrying his mind past rational thought.

You. You. You.

It urged his tired legs forward, kept him standing as he rounded the corner and saw the torn back of your uniform jacket stretched unnaturally over your crumpled form. 

Even with your back to him he would have recognized you anywhere, even as your body contorted unnaturally, muscles spasming wildly as a distorted cry pierced the air. Your hands clawed as the ground, ugly black shards piercing your skin from within, nailbeds black and bloody where your fingertips had rubbed raw in the dirt.

He knew better than to approach you, to roll you to your back as your body seized and writhed in his grasp, more warbled cries piercing the air.

Your eyes were glassy and unfocused as his hands cupped your cheeks. Your skin was hot to the touch, corruption running thickly in your veins and curling out of your skin like ugly black horns. 

He shushed you gently, cradling your head in his arms as your hands tore at his sides, teeth gnashing wildly as the corruption ate away at your humanity before his very eyes. 

“When I turn into an ethereal one day, I want to you promise that you’ll kill me.”

You lifted your head off his chest. “You sure have a strange idea of pillow talk, Haru.”

He snorted, hands tracing down the curve of your spine as you shivered. “Yeah, I know but still…I don’t want to wander in a Hollow forever like some mindless husk. That’s no way to live.”

You bit your cheek, stretching up to peck him on the lips, his hands gently brushing your hair aside as he grinned against your lips.

“Then I trust you to do the same for me.”

He hated himself. He hated that he remembered that conversation you had over a year ago, begging himself to twist the truth, to convince his own mind that you didn’t know the weight of your words. But deep down he knew he couldn’t deny it, deny you, of the peaceful passing he had asked you to offer him. 

This shouldn’t be an issue for him to face. It shouldn’t be you in the throes of corruption, screaming and tearing at him like an animal as your senses fled you body. 

You were supposed to outlive him. The scales of nature were stacked unmistakably in your favor.

Tears wet your cheeks, but they didn’t belong to you. Hot and salty tears poured down his face as his breath stuttered. Everything about this was wrong, like his worst nightmares spawning into a hellish reality as he begged any god that might exist for an easy way out, begged you for forgiveness, for you to answer him with that same gentle smile that was reserved just for quiet moments with him. 

Apologies burned him from the inside out, like venom on his tongue as he peeled your hands off of him and backed away. His hands trembled so violently he could scarcely nock an arrow, his entire body weak. His vision swam, whether it was from the ether corruption that had dinned his hearing or from the tears that didn’t seem to stop he wasn’t sure.

His lip quivered, breathing unsteady as he stared down at you, your form clawing at the earth before pushing shakily onto your knees. You moved more like a marionette than a human, the skin on your neck crumbling under a sheen of black as the core began to manifest. 

Mournful cries dripped from your cyanotic lips as a hand extended in his direction. It was a moment of lucidity, fingers flexing against the veins of corruption under your flesh.

“Haru, I’m so s-sorry.”

The arrow whistled sharply as his fingers released the bowstring.

.

.

.

There was a ring cut to your size. A thin and silver little band that lacked grandiose ornamentation. Diamonds and frills were never your thing after all, he could still see the little quirk in your lips at the memory of your colleagues rushing in with stones so large you thought them better fit for paperweights than proclamations of their belonging to another under the banner of love and marriage. “Practicality above all else,” you had claimed some months ago, thumbing at the simple band around your index finger. Your late mother’s ring.

They both sat on the table on your side of the bed, the metal cold and lifeless under his dull gaze. 

“Asaba, I know this is hard, but there are people who you can talk to. That can help you.” The voice of Yanagi echoed from the answering machine in the hallway. He let his cellphone die weeks ago. 

“We are just worried about you. Please, call me back.”

Your favorite coffee cup still sat beside the pot in the kitchen, the rim stained pink from your favorite lipstick. Your toothbrush still sat in the cup beside his, your shampoo still in the shower. He couldn’t bring himself to disturb the bag hanging in the closet, you didn’t want him to spoil the surprise of the dress you bought in excitement at the prospect of going out to dinner after all.

His medicine bottles sat empty in the bathroom trashcan, the contents lost to the sewers of New Eridu by now.

His lungs heaved tiredly, a deep wheeze whistling in the back of his throat. His vision never stopped swimming, even after he carried you out of the Hollow, an arrow embedded between your glossy eyes as your blood stained his clothes.

His thumb pressed the space between your eyebrows, your nose wrinkling, eyes warm as you stared at him from your side of the bed, hair fanned across your cheeks. 

“Haru, it’s not good for you to lay around all the time.” You whispered, leaning into his touch as his hand drifted to cup your cheek, thumb teasing your lower lip before you pressed a kiss to the pad.

 “Get up, you need to eat.”

He knew it wasn’t real, that you weren’t real, but he smiled like you were anyways. Like your lips were warm as you leaned in and brushed them against his, like there was weight behind the pull of your hands as he rolled out of bed for the first time in days.

There was a ring cut to your size, and for a little while longer he would pretend it was nestled on your finger. 

Rey 2024, crossposted to ao3

[sturniolos-blog]

reader (w/ matt) who struggles w/ an eating disorder and while matt was on tour it became worse, and when he arrived back from tour he finds her passed out on the bathroom floor and noticeably underweight (only if you’re comfortable)

Eating Disorder PT2 - Matt Sturniolo x Y/n oneshot

warnings - eating disorder, throwing up, fainting, insecure, swearing, mentions of blood

disclaimer: third person POV

—————————

8:09pm

Eating was always a problem for Y/n. Growing up a bit bigger, not fat no. But to her she was more than fat, to herself she was huge.

Always comparing herself. ‘What if i was that size?’ ‘What if i went down 10 pounds?’ ‘I wish i was that weight’ ‘I wish i looked like madi’

And the list went on.

So this brought her here, one evening, while her amazing husband Matt was on tour, brought her in the bathroom, sitting on the floor in front of the toilet puking her brains out after she had stuck her finger down her throat because she thought she ate too much, but now she couldn’t stop, throwing up so much her stomach started hurting.

She finally let out one last gag before lifting her head up letting out a pained groan, standing up and flushing the toilet as she wiped her mouth with her sleeve.

Right before everything went black.

—————

9:14pm

“She’s not answering. It’s been 6 hours since i last talked to her, guys.” Matt sighs, running a hand through his hair.

“Well, Matt, she’s probably okay, she could be sleeping.” Nick comforted, putting his hand on Matt’s back, rubbing softly.

Chris nods his head, agreeing with Nick.

But Matt shakes his head, “You guys don’t know my wife, I know my wife. And i know she’s not asleep at nine o clock.” Matt lets out a frustrated sigh.

“Okay, Matt, calm down.” Chris lets out a scoff.

Matt stands up, “Don’t tell me to calm down!” Matt raises his voice, pointing at Chris.

As Nick and Chris look at each other and not say anything Matt shakes his head, “I-i’m sorry. Sorry.” He swallows harshly and takes a breath before sitting back down. “It’s just.. we’ve been going through a bad patch lately, right before I left for tour. She wasn’t okay, guys. She wasn’t.” Matt tears up, looking up at his brothers before wiping his eyes.

—————————

before Matt left for tour

“Matt, stop.” Y/n stood up from the kitchen chair.

“You haven’t eaten all day, Y/n. Come on, sweetheart.” Matt says, putting his hand on Y/n’s shoulder.

“I’m not hungry! God, do you listen?!” Y/n raises her voice at Matt.

This happened a lot through Y/n’s eating disorder, it made her moody and mean to the people she loves. Matt understood that so he kept his composure.

“You have to be hungry, babe, i haven’t seen you eat in like two days.” Matt shakes his head, a soft look on his face.

Y/n groans, “Because you’re never here! You’re always at work-”

“No. We are not doing this, you are not doing this. You are not going to turn this around on me so i feel bad. Y/n, you have a problem and if you don’t eat then im calling your therapist.” Matt threatened, looking down at her.

Y/n sighed, rubbing her head before sitting down and looking at the plate of food Matt had made her.

It was steak, mash potatoes, and green beans. She almost threw up at the sight of it.

“A couple bites is all i’m asking for, baby.” Matt says softly, putting a hand on her back.

Y/n picks up the fork that was laid neatly on the plate before grabbing the knife also.

Her hands were shaky, making it hard for her to cut the steak. When Matt realized this he grabbed the utensils from her hand and cut the steak in tiny pieces for her.

He puts the knife down before using the fork to pick up a now cut piece of steak.

Matt uses his other hand to put it on Y/n’s jaw, his thumb tracing her jawline softly.

“Open.” He instructed as she looked at him nervously.

Y/n slowly opened her mouth as Matt stuck the piece of steak in there, she almost gagged but instead she took the steak off the fork and held it in her mouth.

“Chew, baby, come on, n/n.” Matt sighed as he watched her.

Matt watched as her jaw started moving as she chewed the piece of food in her mouth, a couple more times before he watched her swallow it.

“Good job, sweetheart.” Matt smiled, kissing her cheek softly, making her half smile.

“Couple more?” Matt suggested, making Y/n nod slightly.

—————————

present time (9:16 pm)

“Her eating disorder is back?” Chris asked, his mouth slightly dropped in shock.

Matt lets out a breath and shrugs, “I guess.” Matt says quietly before he puts his face in his hands. “I shouldn’t have left her. God, i’m a terrible husband. My wife is probably starving herself and…” Matt trails off before he stands up and puts on his jacket.

“What are you doing?” Nick looks at Matt with a confused look on his face.

“I need to go see my wife now.” Matt says, an angry tone defined in his voice as he grabs his keys.

Chris let’s out a laugh in disbelief, “You’re gonna leave tour?” He asks, shaking his head at his brother.

“I care much more about my wife then i do this stupid fucking tour. I’m fucking leaving.” Matt spits, leaving the hotel room.

Chris and Nick look at each other in silence.

“What the fuck just happened?” Nick scoffed.

Chris shook his head, “No clue.” Before taking a sip of his pepsi.

—————————

10:34pm

It took Matt over an hour to drive home, him immediately rushing in the house after he had pulled in to the drive way.

“Baby!? I’m home, sweetheart!” He called out, throwing his keys down before checking the downstairs, not seeing Y/n anywhere.

He let out a nervous sigh before he practically ran upstairs, his eyes catching glimpses of the light coming through the opened bathroom door.

His eyes then trail down to a body.

His wife.

“Y/n!” Matt yelled, running into the bathroom and on his knees, taking her body into his arms, him letting out a pathetic sob at the sight of his wife.

The unconscious girl had a cut on her forehead, presumably from when she fell.

Matt sniffled as some of his tears dropped onto Y/n’s shirt.

He had his phone in his hand and was dialing 911, whispering a couple of “Come on, baby..”’s or “Please, Y/n.. please”

“911, what’s your emergency?” A female operator was heard after a couple rings.

“M-my wife! I need an ambulance! I came home and she was on the bathroom floor passed out! Please!” Matt sobbed, another hand going to her cheek.

“Okay, sir, they are on the way. What’s your wife’s name?” The lady asked.

“Y/n. Y/n sturniolo. Please, please get here.” He whimpered out.

“Okay, again they are on the way. And what is your name, sir?” The lady questioned, sounds of clicking from her keyboard coming through the line.

“Matthew sturniolo.” He breathed out before letting out another sob. “Please, my wife-”

“Okay, Matt? I need you to take a couple breaths for me. I need you to answer these questions with a clear head can you do that for me?” The lady spoke calmly, making Matt let out an almost incoherent ‘mhm’ but it was loud enough for her to hear it.

“Great. Now, is Y/n still breathing?”

Matt’s eyes glanced to her belly that rose and fell with every breath, making him nod to himself and then speak to the lady. “Y-yeah, she’s breathing.” He spoke.

“Okay, good, Matt. Good. The ambulance is on the way and should be there in 3 minutes tops, in the meantime take some breaths of your own.” The nice operator constructed.

Matt nodded even though the lady couldn’t see her. He took breaths. His thoughts racing.

My baby.

She’s alright.

You’re not dead, Y/n.

You’re with me.

His thoughts kept going until he heard sirens.

—————————

9:37am (next morning)

Y/n slowly opened her eyes, immediately being blinded by sunlight that was shining through the windows.

She rubbed her eyes before taking in her surroundings.

Monitor. Couch. Windows. Flowers. But most importantly Matt.

He had his eyes on his phone, not noticing Y/n had waken up.

Y/n cleared her throat, “Matt?” She whispered.

Matts head shot up, along with his whole body immediately standing up. “Hi, baby.” He smiled softly at her, bringing one of his hands to push hair out of her face.

Y/n smiled before she looked around again, “How’d i get here?” She asked, her voice scratchy and quiet.

Matt shook his head, “You had an accident, baby. You fell and hit your head.” He told her.

Y/n scrunched her eyebrows, picking up her hands to see that an iv was in her right wrist and a hospital bracelet on her left. She let out a small, ‘huh’

Matt looks at Y/n before a knock at the door brings them both to look that way, a doctor walked in.

“Y/n, good to see you. So, do you know what happened?” The doctor asked, sitting on a stool.

Y/n nodded, “Matt told me i fell and hit my head.”

The doctor glanced at Matt and nodded, “Right. But you fell because of something, do you know what that something is?” The doctor asked her.

Y/n knew, 100%. Matt knew that she knew. Y/n knew Matt knew that she knew. But that didn’t change her answer. “No..” She said quietly, making Matt rub his face.

“You haven’t had proper meals lately. You passed out from not enough protein in your body. When’s the last time you ate a good meal?” The doctor continued to question.

Y/n shrugged, “More than a week ago, i guess.” She sighed, avoiding eye contact with Matt as his jaw dropped slightly.

He left for tour a week ago. This broke Matt’s heart.

The doctor nodded, “Okay well you have two IV’s in your arm, one keeping you hydrated and one giving you some nutrients. We’d like to keep you for another night but after that you are free to go.” She smiled.

Y/n nodded, “Thank you.” She mumbled as the doctor nodded back before leaving the room.

After a couple seconds of silence Matt speaks up, “You could’ve talked to me.”

“You left.” Y/n whispered.

“But if i had known what was going on beforehand then i wouldn’t have, Y/n!” Matt raises his voice at her, making her look at him with glassy eyes. He sighed, “I’m sorry. I just love you so much and if you keep doing this then i’m going to lose you a-and that can’t happen. Okay? It can’t!” Matt let out a sob, putting his face in his hands.

Y/n grabbed his wrist, “Come here, baby.” She muttered as she pulled him onto the bed with her.

He left out a couple more sobs as his head ended up on her chest, her fingers running through his hair.

“You won’t lose me, Matt. Never ever.” She said, kissing his head.

—————————

um anyway

taglist: @sturniolosmind @novasturniolo03 @hearts4chriss @vinniehackerslefttoe @christhopersturniolo @mattybswife @streamermattsgf @sturnolio-luvs @sturnioloslurps @marlenafortuna @lovergirl4387 @sturniololovesss

[jiinxswife]

Jinx x fem!reader - how would jinx react to your additions?

Trigger warnings: self harm, drinking, depression, smoking, jinx acting toxic because she doesn’t knows better. Self harm is the longest one for personal reasons

Autor note: I wrote and posted this yesterday, but apparently, due to a mistake, it got deleted, so I’m posting this again

Self harm

•oh your girl is pissed and worried when she finds out about your addiction

•100% chased down everyone who ever made/influenced you to hurt yourself

•tries to help you, but ends up guilt tripping you. “You’re hurting yourself? You know how badly I had it? And even so I didn’t hurt myself”

•”if you cut yourself again, I will cut myself too” she says once she starts to get desperate

•”you drew stars around my scars” yeah, but it isn’t stars but random doodles and phrases that comes into jinx’s mind

•always caress your scars, always having a thumb gently caressing/tracing over them

•if you’re insecure about your scars, she will kiss them while whispering that she loves you how you are, if even so you still feel really insecure about them, she will offer to get you a tattoo would definitely be a matching one or her name

•if your depression/self harm addiction gets worse, her hideout is becoming child-proof, guns, grenades and everything dangerous is hidden and safety nets are installed everywhere you could jump off

•keeps an eye on you for every new cut

•Will try everything she can to help you, even buy some self help books, even if she finds most of them to be bullshit

•praises you a hell lot when you’re clean, makes sure to tell you how proud she is

•if you have a kink like knife play, she won’t accomplish to it, she doesn’t wants you to get mental health and pleasure mixed

•called you her “fruit ninja champion” at least once-

Drinking/alcoholism

•the addiction that most annoys her

•when you come home wasted, on the first times at least, she takes care of you, once it becomes an habit, she starts to get annoyed

•jinx is really clingy and possessive, and it annoys her that you’re prioritizing alcohol over her

•tries to go to bars with you, if you won’t stop drinking, maybe you could drink together? But you get drunk way too soon

•starts to make your drinks, but changes the alcohol for water or something, in an attempt to detoxify with the placebo effect

•if you persist in your addiction, she will start to saying things like “it’s me or the alcohol”

•Will try to get you addicted to something else so you leave the drinks addicted to her

•if you get clean, she’s praising you a lot. And also threatening every single bar owner to never sell you anything alcoholic

Smoking

•the addiction that she’s most used to

•grew up seeing Sevika and Silco smoking

•shows you the best brands of cigarettes her princess deserves the best

•doesn’t really tries to stop your addiction, at the start at least

•if you start to get sick due to the smoking, she will definitely make you stop. There ain’t hospitals in zaun; and due to her reputation, none of you could ever enter piltover

•if you’re trying to stop, she starts to always walk with popsicles on her pockets

•Lollipops that leave the tongue blue, do I have to say anything more?

Ahhhh this was my second time writing it, first post got deleted for some reason. I’m sorry it’s short, I just don’t know what else to write , anyways, I’m posting this before I hate it way too much

[sinsmockingbird]

So, uh, I usually don't write for the new PTN Sinners that are announced (China is 6 months ahead of global updates), but with the reveal of Korryn and Mira, and seeing that they are cowgirls! I had to write something very OOC... @sea-lanterns Angey, come get the cowgirls (Korryn's part is sub!reader). Also a big believer that Korryn has nipple piercings as well as the belly button one... she seems like the type.

CW: NSFW, Smut under the cut

✧ KORRYN

FEATURES: Bottom!Character, Top!Reader, Riding, Strap Use, Southern Drawl, Wearing her hat

"Look at you, doll, riding me so good." Korryn purred, leaning back against the beds headboard, her hands loosely holding your hips. She had a grin on her face, watching as you grinded your hips down against her and bounced on her strap.

You looked so good, her cowgirl hat slightly ascue on your head, covering a bit of your eyes as you had your head bowed. Your hands were planted on her chest, grabbing at her breasts and squeezing them, making her moan softly in pleasure as your thumbs bumped against her nipple piercings.

"K-Korryn..!" You whimpered her name pathetically, a pout on your lips as you struggled to continue riding her strap, your muscles beginning to ache.

"Hm? What is it, darlin'? Can't ride my strap?" Korryn's southern drawl made her words roll off her tongue in a way that you gushing a bit more wetness all over her strap. "Come on, riding a me is so much easier than a horse. You can do it."

She patted your thigh encouragingly, tilting her head slightly to the side. You whined but didn't complain any further. Instead, you focused on rotating your hips, trying to sink her strap deeper into you. It was a pretty sight, one that Korryn was going to enjoy watching all night long.

✧ MIRA

FEATURES: Sub!Character, Dom!Reader, Fingering, Slightly Public Sex, Keeping Quiet

It was a rather slow day down at the bar, leaving Mira unoccupied aside from cleaning glasses and refilling the alcohol behind the bar. Until you came to visit her and keep her company. It was how you both ended up in the back with Mira pressed against the wall, a hand over her mouth.

"Keeping so quiet for me, Mira." You mutter, kissing her neck while your hand worked wonders under her dress. You were fingering her nice and fast, making her let out sounds that she desperately tried to muffle.

"T-Trying too..." Mira whimpered, biting the palm of her hand as a loud moan threatened to escape her mouth as the palm of your hand continuously bumped against her aching clit.

"And you're doing such a good job." You praised, pecking her cheek before lifting your other hand to grasp her chin. You tilted her head up, kissing her deeply and muffling her sounds as your fingers upped in their tempo in thrusting.

You could tell Mira was getting close by her frequent whimpers and the feeling of her pussy clamping down around you. It made you smile against her lips, knowing you were making her feel so good.

"Gonna cum, baby?" You mumbled against her lips, making her nod quickly and whimper out a yes. "Cum whenever you want."

It only took a few more deep thrusts until Mira was cumming all over your hand, her hands grasping at your shirt, tugging at it while her body shook. As the pleasure subsided, she slumped against you, shaking and trying to catch her breath. She hoped she'd be able to stand after this when behind the bar.

[ceruleanangel]

Diamond of Zaun- Chapter 4

Pairings: Vi x Reader, Silco x Reader

Tags: f!reader, performer!reader

Content Warnings: Drug Use, Angsty Angst, Blood

a/n: writing another chapter of DoZ > studying for my midterms. Guys college is quite literally kicking my ass, wish me luck

Also I made a Spotify playlist for DoZ, pls accept this as my apology for the time this chapter took to make: Diamond of Zaun

Chapter 3

“He’s here for you again Y/n!”

A shiver runs through your body as your head quickly dodges into a hand mirror, brushing strays of hair away from your face, reapplying your new lip tint before setting it back on the table. You smooth your skirt down, lounging into the green vines that rest about the chaise. 

“Let him in.”

You pretend to be enamored by a small novel as the curtain to the room is drawn to the side. The tall silhouette slips into the room, making its way towards you, taking a seat on the table in front of you. You feel the book being guided upwards as he glimpses at the front cover. 

“A love story? I didn’t take you as a hopeless romantic.” your eyes glide up from the words on the page to glimpse into his heterochromic ones. A smirk pulls at your cheeks, “Can’t a girl have her dreams?”   

Your last words are cut off by patrons enjoying themselves next door. He glances back at the book, a rueful smile on his face, “Not here.” 

A moment of silence passes before he takes the book into his own hands and moves to sit beside you on the chaise. He reads the contents of the page to you, your head moving to rest on his shoulder.  Despite the distracting sounds of pleasure from across the curtain and raucous shouting from outside, you shut your eyes, drowning out everything but the melancholic words of romance and grandeur pooling from his mouth. 

It’s only when the cacophony outside becomes too much that his words come to a stop as he folds a tassel into the book, setting it on the side table. You feel Silco’s eyes slide on to you as you knowingly avoid his eyes, a smile slipping on your lips. You feel the warmth of his hand resting on your thigh, “Sweetheart?” “Hm?” 

“May your voice tonight?”

You look up into his eyes and for the first time tonight your cheeks slightly flush. “You desire to hear me sing that much?” you avert your eyes, whispering, “you ask this every time you visit.” Silco chuckles, lowering his head to speak directly into your ear,

 “and I thank the gods everytime you grace me with it” 

You playfully sigh, trying to calm your heart, sitting up. And you take a deep breath, releasing your siren song. 

Current Time 

Your breath grows ragged in your throat as you finally reach the door to the hideout, almost slamming into the door. The doorknob turns in your grip as you enter, your body freezing on the spot as you see her. 

You glimpse her pained expression as she presses her hands to her dripping torso, gritting her teeth, as your blood drains from your skin. It feels as if you’re at the bottom of a lake, the air dragging on your limbs as you take one step, willing your feet towards Vi, coming to a stop a step away. Caitlyn rushes past you, going to sit next to her, feeding Vi some of the liquid. Vi wrenches, bolting upright. You instantly drop down to your knees, cupping her cheek, your thumb tracing her cheekbone, “It’s alright, it’s alright…i’m right here,” 

Vi slowly comes too, her eyes focus on yours, widening. You begin to slip your hand away to give her space but the very next moment her hand is clasped to yours, holding it flush against her face, 

“No…stay.”

You feel your face begin to buckle as you feel a lump in your throat that you can’t quite swallow. Vi’s other hand comes up to brush back your hair, studying your face, the new scar on your nose, the purple tinted triangles under your eyes, the way your ears have been pierced. You in turn search her eyes, looking from one to the other as the tears in your eyes threaten to fall. 

Vi’s mouth begins to open as Caitlyn, who has stood up, mentions their search for Jinx, “...who’s powder?” Vi’s eyes leave yours, looking to where caitlyn stands by the door, she sits up, answering her question. Vi stands and as the two begin to speak once again, but your ears catch an increase of howls. Your hairs stand on end as you rise, moving towards the door, closing one eye to focus your attention through a splinter in the wood. Your blood goes cold, eyes becoming round as you glimpse the tall figure standing, holding his arms graciously to the beggars, poison in hand.

Your head whips around to glimpse Vi also becoming aware of the noises, before you can say anything, her hand is on the knob of the door. Thousands of thoughts fly through your head. Silco never hid that he wasn’t fond of this particular Zaunite, and if he sees you holed up with this particular ghost…

In that split second you fling yourself against the wall out of sight as Vi opens the door. Inadvertently you bump into a pillar that shakes the foundations of the hut, the walls rocking and creaking as the sway. You hear Silco’s voice echo across the chasm, the volume of your heartbeats beginning to drain it out.

All you can hear is the escalating drumming in your ears, as the world becomes a hazy blur of brown and gray…

What if he sees me? 

What if he already saw? 

What’ll he do if…? 

He won’t trust me anymore.

he won’t …need me anymore. 

You’re knocked forward as the splinter brimmed beam behind you sways forward under the force of Caitlyn’s fist. Your vision becomes clear as you’re jolted back into the moment, head shooting up to glimpse the creaking nails slowly being wedged out of their posts. You step back just in time as Vi turns, striking the beam with her fist, the sounds of cracking wood and bending metal filling your ears. Your eyes close out of reflex, arms moving up to shield yourself, before you feel a grip on your wrist urging you forward. When you open your eyes you glimpse the red of Vi's jacket, dodging the falling debris as she guides you both towards the lights of the city.

Looking back, you see Silco cowering on the ground, surrounded by his collapsed minions, the flickering neon light illuminating their hunched, distorted forms. 

As your attention is drawn away you manage to side step on a beam, your ankle giving way, folding under your weight. A strangled cry escapes your throat as you go down, but Vi is quick to wrap your arm around her shoulders, hoisting you both forward. The three of you climb and manage up the ravine to make it to an upper area, you taste the dirt coating your mouth as you heave ragged breaths, unable to keep up. You stop to catch your breath, biting your lip at the dull throb of your ankle. Vi turns to look at you but your attention is drawn by a billowing blue smoke rising above the city tops.

“Powder…” You hear Vi whisper, her eyes glossy. You put together the puzzle pieces in your mind and sooner than you can realize it, you place your hand on her cheek,

“Go to her.” 

She turns back to you, brows furrowed, “No- I’m not leaving you I-”

“Vi” You speak more firmly, “I will be okay…go to her.” You glimpse her lip trembling as she looks into your eyes, jaw clenched. You glance at the smoke once more, whispering

“She needs you more than I do..” you summon a smile of reassurance, trying to distract from the tears collecting in your eyes. Vi looks at you, eyes helpless as she looks from you to the smoke, biting her lips as she thinks. She finally squeezes her eyes shut, launching forward as she embracing you, her death-like grip hardly giving you room to return the touch

“I will be back, I promise.” 

She releases you, hands coming up to cup your cheeks, face inches from hers. You gaze up into her eyes, the world seems to still for this very moment, unable to hear anything other than Vi’s rough voice 

“I-” 

Her mouth hangs open, words on the tip of her tongue, eyes earnest as she searches yours. She blinks hard, eyes casting down

“I promise..” 

She whispers the reassurance to you before turning to sprint down an alleyway towards the smoke, Caitlyn not far behind. You let out the breath you unknowingly held, leaning against a wall, letting your eyes fall shut. Only then does the staggered buzzing of a neon light remind you of another. 

As quickly as you can, you limp back down the way you came, cascading the side of the ravine. You traverse the broken beams and metal sheets. You hear him before you see him, a crazed shout that you’ve never heard from him before. He erratically kicks and yells before going limp on one of the metal beams. You can’t help the shake in your voice.

“Silco…?”

His head whips to meet your voice, his eyes holding a cold hatred that you’ve never seen directed at you. Just as soon as he realizes it's you, his eyes widen turning back to the rubble 

“What are you doing down here? I’ve told you it’s dangerous.”

Your steps are slow, avoiding the debris, teeth grinding as pain shoots up your leg. “I know.” You come forward, placing a hand on his shoulder as he buries his face within his hands. You smooth your hand across his back, sitting alongside him

“That ghost is not dead” he grits out, your hand stilling for a moment, breathe leaving your lungs. You blink rapidly before intaking a breath, continuing your motions

“Let’s go home, Silco.”

Chapter 5 Coming Soon...

#fem!reader #thediamondofzaun #viarcane #vixreader #caitvi #caitvixreader #silcoxreader #arcanesilco #arcanexreader

[horseshoegirl]

Set Me Alight: Part 9 - The Woods

📜Hi..... It's been a hot minute. My mental health was not in a good space back in April when I last posted. I signed off because of it. And now I'm considering coming back because after countless therapy sessions and working on what I could, now seemed like the perfect time. Also, my therapist told me writing is my saving grace, so she and a few countless friends are the reason I'm back... for now... maybe on a trial basis to see how things go.

That's it :)

Now, Let's see how those two are doing, shall we?

❗️+18, Minors DNI, Strong Language, Enemies to Lovers, Original Female Character (s), Short OFC, Angst, Description of injuries, banter, snark, getting lost in the woods.

#5.2k

Part 8 | Masterlist | Part 10

The first thing you can register is pain.

Not the dirt or the leaves or the twigs under your hands. Not the light mist of spitting rain leaving dewdrops on your face. It's the deep ache of your muscles and the crunch of your spine. You can't move, your body remaining locked up and in limbo. You couldn't dare move a single inch, even if you thought about it, attempting to shift yourself amongst the dirt.

But you can feel - that must count for something, right?

You focus on trying to open your eyes, using every bit of mental power you currently possess. The dark lull is too strong, enticing you to stay—stay and fall back asleep once more, stay and give into slumber, stay so its unforgiving grip on you can threaten to pull you under once more.

Something else, or someone else, pulls you out of its grip instead. A pair of hands suddenly gripping your shoulders. They gently but insistently pushed and pulled, attempting to shake you awake.

"Midge," a voice cuts through, sounding near and infinitely far enough away in the same breath. "Come on, Midge. Wake up."

Ah. I'm hearing voices. I must be in hell. 

Those same hands shift, one sliding down to your waist and the other to the side of your neck. While you couldn't feel the ground beneath you before, you could feel those hands, their touch, chasing the darkness away and bringing feeling back into your body. Unfortunately, each jostle or movement sends ripples of pain throughout your limbs, muscles, and bones. 

Stop! It hurts! Stop! Stop! Stop!

A thumb glides across your cheek, fingers curling into the back of your neck. "Midge, you need to open those pretty eyes for me," the voice urges again. "Let me see them, please!"

You were trying. Really, you were trying to listen to the voice. You wanted to open your eyes. Everything was simply too much effort. Your head hurt, your back, your injured wrist pulsing and throbbing. Even your lungs hurt, and awareness of each breath suddenly made every one that followed an effort. 

The voice grew impatient, and you clearly weren’t trying hard enough as they shook you a little more forcibly. 

"You're not dying out here, Midge! Not before I can... Come on! Yell at me. Insult me, tell me how much you hate me, just let me know you are okay!"

The person curved their hand into a supportive grip, the other now gripping at the back of your legs as they lifted you from the ground. You moaned at the ache it caused, pain shooting down the length of your spine.

"Midge?"

You're not sure where the strength comes from or how you managed to open your eyes. It's a quick flutter; all you can see is a blurry, white, cloudy sky. There’s also a shape of something leaning over you. You blink and then blink again, forcing yourself to twist in a pair of arms like you had awoken early in the morning.

The third time you blink, things are much clearer now, and you realize, half laying here in this forest bed of dirt, it's Jake leaning over you, holding you. There’s mud smeared across his cheeks, his beard covered in bits and pieces of leaves. His golden blonde hair seemed to have gotten the worst of it; clumps of dirt, leaves, maybe even a stick or two caught up in the strands, you couldn’t tell. 

You also couldn’t help but notice how panicked he looked —his eyes were usually so confident and teasingly wide with concern. Or how the lines of his face were furrowed, crow's feet creasing hard. 

This is so at odds with how the two of you normally act with each other, how he normally looks at you, that it disorients you further. As you're trying to figure out why you are on the ground and why he is holding you, you catch the words tumbling out of his mouth from above.

"Hey, Midge, can you hear me?" he asks, his voice cracking slightly. A hand pushes away your hair, almost covering your eyes. “Come on, talk to me. Please."

Midge. Annoying Nat. Nat. Natasha. The fight. The Bear, Jake... Falling...

Everything comes rushing forward, surging forth in a tidal wave of memories that has you gasping for breath. It's an adrenaline rush of panic and hurt that has you twisting out of his arms and landing on your stomach, face first in the ground. You shout out harshly, "Get your hands off me, you asshole! Trying to cop up a feel while I'm knocked flat out?" 

Jake only leaned forward, his hands hovering over you uncertainly, unsure whether to retreat or try to help you further. "Are you okay?" 

You laugh mockingly into the dirt. "We just fell down a fucking cliff. Are you seriously asking me that right now?"

Failing miserably to push yourself up, you accidentally attempt to place weight on your injured wrist, practically forgetting it was injured in the first place. A sharp stab shoots up your arm, causing you to cry out and fall on your shoulder. Everything is blending together at this point: your head, back, and entire body, and you know there's not much you can do about it. 

Jake's hands immediately grab onto you, finding a place on your back and elbow, gently guiding you to sit in front of him. You're in too much pain to protest, and that fact alone makes you want to give in to the overwhelming urge to hurl whatever is in your stomach out into the dirt.

Or on Jake. Yes, I should have thought that first. 

Once he gets you sitting on your butt, you shake your shoulders, trying to get him to let go. Jake listens to you for once, lifting his hands off you like your touch has suddenly burned him. 

You wish he had been. You also wish he didn't let go. His touch, even if it was his touch, had brought you some comfort as you battled the tears streaming down your face. You’d never admit it, though. 

His eyes search your body, seeking out possible injuries and bruises, until they snag on how you are clutching your wrist tightly to your chest. 

"Let me see," he says, shuffling forward quickly on his knees amongst the dirt and leaves. He reaches out gently, fingers just skimming the fabric of your jacket when you tilt away with a frown. 

"No, I'm fine," you lie. 

Jake pulls back, his hand still floating mid-air. "You honestly can't tell me you're fine after that? Miss, 'we just fell down a fucking cliff. Why are you asking me that?'"

No .

 "Yes! I'm fine!"

Jake’s eyes call you out on your bullshit lie. 

"And I'm the Queen of England. Midge, just let me see it."

You don’t fight him this time as Jake reaches for your wrist. You aren’t in that much of a position to fight him on this either. His grasp is firm but gentle, and he carefully extends your arm out for him to see. The clasps had popped themselves free with the fall, the bandage covered in dirt, small flecks of leaves, pieces of wood, and God knows what else. The end was hanging loosely off the base of your wrist, and Jake frowned when he touched it. 

"Did Mickey even look at your wrist?" he snapped as he started to unwrap it from your wrist. 

You eyed him carefully. "Yes. Why? It's more than I can say for you."

Yeah, Maeve, he probably just saved your life, and you're still spewing hateful shit.

Jake ignored you, unwinding the fabric from your limb. "Damn, asshole didn't wrap it tight enough.” 

“Why would you care?” you snap.

“Cause I asked him to.” 

You stiffened at his words, drawing in a sharp breath. Bunching the length of fabric on his lap once he got it off, Jake never took his eyes off your wrist as he prodded the largest bruise. "I'm the reason you hurt it in the first place. Why wouldn’t I care?"

Lies . Oh, you wanted to scream that he was lying. There was no way, no fucking way he had asked Mickey to look. There’s no reason he’d care. None that you can think of

Skeptical of his actions, you croaked out softly, "You're not exactly a medical professional, Jake." 

"Neither is Mickey. Clearly." He scoffed back, turning your hand so it was face up. 

You clenched your jaw, fighting the urge to snap back at him. But when he pressed on a tender spot, you hissed out, "Mickey asked Cora. She wrapped it."

Jake shook his head. “So he couldn’t even do it himself.” 

“He asked the professional.” 

“I should have done it myself.” 

“Do you think I would have let you?” 

"If you weren't so reckless all the time, then maybe you would have!" he snapped, his grip tightening on the bandage for a moment before he forced himself to relax. "Running off into the woods like that? What the hell were you thinking!" 

You bit your lip, slamming your eyes shut before everything snapped and broke free. 

"Reckless?! I was trying to get away from you!" you shrieked. "You were the one who followed me into that bush!" 

"Because I was trying to fucking apologize, Midge! And thank god I did! Who knows what would have happened to you! You’re always so fucking stubborn!"

“Do you think I wanted you to follow me? After everything that’s happened in the past twenty-four hours? You ruined Nat’s proposal, you fucking pranked me with those two idiots, and.. And…” 

You couldn’t speak, too caught up in every overwhelming thought and emotion. Jake took advantage of your moment of weakness to continue. 

“You think I can just leave you alone?! You don’t think I’ve tried?! I’m trying to apologize, damn it! For everything! For all of it! I have no idea what I did for you to be this mean to me, but can’t you see even that?” 

“I don’t want your apology!” you shouted, pain and anger mixing in your voice. “I just wanted you to leave me alone! I just wanted you to stop hurting me!” 

Jake took a deep breath, his jaw tightening as he remained uncommonly silent. 

You shook your head, tears welling up in your eyes. "You can't just fix everything with an apology, Jake. Some things... some things can't be undone."

The forest was eerily silent, the only sound the distant rustle of leaves in the wind. The air was thick with unspoken words and unresolved tension. Jake's jaw was clenched as he carefully examined your wrist, his fingers gently probing the bruised skin. His eyes remained fixed on his task. You stared off into the trees, your breathing shallow and uneven, trying to mask the pain and the anger simmering just below the surface.

“Leave the bandage off,” he finally says after a moment, his voice quiet. “It’s making your bruise worse.” 

Jake avoided your eyes as he stood, your bandage in hand. He was quick as he worked, wrapping the fabric back into a roll. Still on the ground, you watched his fingers, realizing he was doing it correctly. A tiny voice somewhere deep within your hardened heart wondered where he had learned to do that in the first place. 

He held it out to you, head turned away. You only stared up at him, his hand holding the bandage, half stuck to the ground. When you didn’t take it right away, Jake faced you with an expectant gaze. 

You did eventually, weakly reaching for your backpack as it lay forgotten in a pile of leaves. 

Last you could recall, it had been on your back as the two of you had fallen. Jake must have taken it off you while trying to wake you. 

The state of your belongings within or your fragile paint brushes and paints were the furthest things from your mind as you worked the zipper of the front pocket first before blindly holding out your hand to Jake. He placed the bandage silently into your palm. You threw it in, not bothering to see if there had been space for it. Threading the straps through your arms, you settled your bag against your back, hoping you could walk like this. 

You struggled to your feet, wincing as you braced yourself with your uninjured hand against the ground. Your other wrist throbbed, though, along with practically everything else in your body, reminding you exactly how you and Jake ended up in this situation. Or how either one of you would manage to get back to the rest of the group. 

That was until you turned to look up. 

“Oh no.” 

“Oh yes.” 

“No… No... No!” 

“I don’t think shouting no will change the fact, Midge.” 

“As if all this couldn’t get fucking worse.” 

“We just had a run-in with a bear. You see this as worse?” 

You clenched your fists, the reality sinking in with each passing breath. “I would have rather seen my life end as a pile of bear shit.” 

“Really, Midge?” he remarked with disbelief and frustration. “Is that how you see it?”

You glared at him, the anger still simmering. “Yes, Jake. Because being stuck here with you is worse than anything I could have imagined.”

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Look, I get it. You’re angry. But do you honestly think dwelling on it isn’t going to help us right now?”

You let out a humourless laugh. “Oh, so now you’re the voice of reason? The guy who wanted us to climb up a cliff carrying all our stuff to save what? Fifteen Minutes? You want to climb up that ?”

And what did Jake do but grit his teeth? He offered you nothing else but a reddened face and steely eyes, clearly lit up in frustration. 

Silence fell, and tension was thick between you. The sounds of the forest seemed amplified in the absence of your bickering. You couldn't deny the fear creeping in, the realization that you were truly isolated.

Isolated. With him.

“I may not have all the answers, but sitting here fighting isn’t going to solve anything. We need each other to get out of this,” Jake tried again. 

You scoffed, shaking your head. “The last thing I need is more of your stupid plans.”

“Well, it’s either that or we both end up dead out here. Do you really want to risk that?”

You paused. It was a serious ask. Your anger didn’t completely fade, but the urgency of the situation was undeniable. “No, I don’t want to die out here.”

Jake nodded, the tension in his shoulders easing slightly. “Then we need to work together, whether we like it or not. At least until we find someone or something or a way to get out of here.”

You clenched your jaw, feeling a mixture of frustration and very reluctant acceptance. 

“Fine.”

“Fine,” Jake echoed, his voice resolute.

He gestured towards an opening in the bush, you adjusting the straps of your bag, taking a shaky step forward. Jake followed closely behind, and as the two of you trekked off into basically the unknown, you couldn’t help but think… The second I see poison Ivy, I’m shoving it down his shirt. 

—

"I hate you."

"No, you don't, sweetheart."

"I fucking hate you, Seresin. I'm not your sweetheart."

"Don't lie to me, Midge. I know you love me. I did save your life and all that." 

"Kiss my fucking ass, jackass."

"Are you offering?"

You let go of the tree branch you'd been holding out of the way, letting it swing back and thwack Jake in the face. "Oops," you called out sarcastically, not bothering to look back.

Jake stumbled back, swatting at the branch like a pesky insect. "Ow, what the -"

"Watch out for the low-hanging branches," you mocked, the corners of your mouth twitching upwards. Jake rubbed his face with his eyes closed, grinning despite the slight sting. "That branch hit harder than your insults."

"Practice makes perfect, right?"

You're not sure how long the two of you had been walking, though given how low the sun was, it was safe to assume it had been hours. The two of you followed the bottom of the cliff until you could no longer do so, hoping there might have been a slope or at least something along that cliffside either of you could climb up.

But the terrain became treacherous with each step, and the underbrush became impossible to navigate. More rocks littered your path, forcing you and Jake to veer off into a less dense part of the forest.

The further you went in, the less you knew where you were or how to return to that cliff. The forest swallowed any trace, everything the same yet different.

It was hard when you only had the compass and not your map. With a map, you could potentially figure out where you both were and where you should be heading. The compass only told you the direction you were facing, not where you should go. 

You aren’t sure if you’re even happy the tension back at that cliff had dissipated within an hour, the two of you returning to your normal back-and-forth banter. Jake hadn’t once brought up that question he had asked before the two of you ran into your little friend, and there were no signs he was about to either. 

It was simply the same old, same old, Seresin and Midge. 

Stepping over a fallen tree trunk, you looked up from the ground only to freeze. There, stretching vertically across your path, was a chain-linked fence. It merged and disappeared into the thicket, maybe even a few trees growing through the interlocking pieces of metal. Tackled to one section was a weather-beaten sign, the words and icon on it fading, though you could still make out the message. 

Keep out - Authorized Personnel Only.

You’re not sure if these types of fences were supposed to be out here, dead centre in the middle of nowhere, but the sight of it is less than comforting. 

Jake hadn’t realized you’d stopped, slamming himself right into your back. You tripped forward in a daze but caught yourself before hitting the fence. You spun on your heel, ready to give him a piece of your mind. 

“Look where the hell you’re going, Seresin!” 

“Hey, what’s the big - “Jake cut himself off when he saw what was behind you for the first time. “Oh… a fence.” 

You rolled your eyes, turning back to investigate its sudden presence. You pointed to the keep-out sign. “Look.” 

Jake squinted, then offered a shrug. “It’s probably just the park boundary line.” 

You frowned, peering through the mesh at the expanse of untouched forest that lay beyond. “Or something else. Maybe it’s a dumping ground. You know, where they keep the bodies.” 

Jake rolled his eyes. “Because every remote part of a national park is a crime scene or conspiracy,” he said, his tone dripping in sarcasm. 

You whipped around, pushing on his shoulder. Jake didn’t even move an inch. You felt stupid for even trying. 

"Well, excuse me for being suspicious of a big ominous-looking fence in the middle of a woods that has a keep out sign!" you snapped, your mind now racing with the possibilities, none reassuring.

Jake bit his lip. "You know, this feels a bit like Jurassic Park..."

You closed your eyes. "Jake... No...Don't say it..."

"When they find the raptor pen," he grinned. "And it all goes to hell a few hours later."

"Can you not?" You shudder. "I'm going to be fucking terrified now, thinking something is following us."

Jake rolled his eyes, returning the way you both came. "It's just us, Midge. Come on, scared a serial killer is hiding out in these woods?" he teased.

You murmured something under your breath, following him before turning off at the next apparent break in the forest, Jake having stopped to wait for you to catch up.

You called out into the trees in a sing-song manner, "Psycho Killer, que'est ce que c'est?"

Jake cocked an eyebrow at the back of your head as he followed you. "Ah, the artist listens to music."

"So does the douche," you shot over your shoulder.

"It's Talking Heads. Who hasn't heard them."

You laughed softly to yourself. "Not the Taylor Swift loving groupie's back at the camp."

You internally cringed as soon as the words came out of your mouth. The ill-fated Halloween party flashes in your mind, that girl and him in the bathroom—that damning orange dress. You're glad he can't see your face right now. 

Somewhere behind you, Jake let out a fake gasp. "Now, what do you have against T.Swift?"

You roll your eyes again, pushing away a branch and holding it back until Jake is close enough. "Nothing, personally. I just don't like her music. Or her fandom."

You let the branch go, the leaves rustling as it swung backwards. Jake dodged it just in time when it whipped towards his face. "Midge..." 

"I told you to keep an eye out." 

A smirk tugged at his lips. "You're enjoying this way too much." 

You shrugged nonchalantly, stepping over a fallen log. "Maybe. It's not every day I get to torture someone with my taste in music."

“But it’s Taylor Swift, Midge.” 

You made a disgruntled noise. "Why does every fan of hers like to shit on someone who doesn't like her music? It's not the only thing out there. So, I don't like her music. I'm not a fucking martyr."

You're not sure if you are surprised whether or not the remark didn't incite a reaction from him. From what you've seen online, her fans loved to attack those who didn't share their opinion. Sure, there were good ones. The ones you thought, like with everything, who existed in a minority. The ones who appreciated what she did or even does for music, not the ones who latched on to who she, and in their words, was destroying next. 

Jake seemed like the last person to be a Taylor Swift fan, but you weren't one to judge someone who liked works of art. Jake also loved to rile you up for no apparent reason. He would do this just to piss you off further. 

Realizing the rustling of leaves and branches behind you had ceased, you stopped, twisting to look over your shoulder. Jake stood motionless between two trees, staring at you with metaphorical gears grinding over his head. The sight was unnerving. It left you wondering what he was thinking or perhaps what he was waiting for you to do. 

Or what remark he was currently concocting. 

But no banter was coming from his lips: no eagerness or cocky smirk, horrible statement or condensing glare. The urge to fill this extended silence was building the longer it lasted. It seemed like not saying anything would make it that much worse. You're still trying to figure out why you even wanted to. 

"It's not that I don't want to. I did. Once upon a time," you offer hesitantly. "Things just change, I guess." 

"Didn't like it when she switched to pop?" he asked, offering no hint of emotion, nor did he try to move or lift his eyes. The moment that settled over the two of you was calm, no thick heat or fire in search of something of either of yours to burn. 

It’s perhaps why the following words flew out of your mouth so easily. "More like every mean girl started listening to her music, and suddenly she was the villain icon for everyone to excuse their fucking behaviour.” 

You visibly winced when you realized what you had said. Not because that haunting memory was always at the forefront of your mind when it came to Jake, but because you revealed more of yourself than you wanted him to know.  

You turned to face the path, taking a few steps forward, hoping Jake would take the hint and drop it. But when you didn't hear him try to follow you, you twisted back again to see him still standing in the same spot, his eyes now on you and lighting up with a thousand revelations all at once. 

Then came the shift. The subtle softening of his face gave way to one of regret. 

You hated it.

"You were bullied growing up?" the words come out of his mouth softly. 

You averted your eyes, staring at the ground. 

"Who hasn't?" you laughed ashamedly, shrugging your shoulders. "I mean, you probably haven't... Where do you think I got all this snark?" 

Lies, Maeve. He's the reason you got all this snark. You simply ran away back then. 

"So you don't listen to her music because you were bullied?"

You met his eye. 

Nobody had really asked you about this before. You hadn't offered to tell anyone about it either. Nat loved her, practically worshipped the ground she walked on, and it was apparent now more than ever that Nat would have never understood where you were coming from if you had. 

You're not sure why Jake is that person now, why it's suddenly spewing all out of you. He was the person you spent most of your life hating during and after school. Yet, because of that fact, you knew deep down you had nothing to lose by telling him. 

You didn't lift your eyes when you shook your head. "I didn't. At least, I don't really. Sometimes, now she's making new albums... creating songs that don't bear the same weight in memories. But it's hard to shake the association."

Suddenly, shame wracks your whole body, and you turn away, taking a few steps forward. You want to run. Run like you always have from him. 

This time, you know you can't. 

If you ran, it would doom you both. As much as you wanted to live, the one thing you refused to be responsible for was Jake's death. After all, if either of you got out of this place alive, you'd have no actual reason to be around him anymore. 

Waiting for Jake to follow, you watched a worm twisting its way through the mud. You focused in on its shape, letting your eyes glaze over a blur. Even as Jake finally moved and stopped at your side, waiting for you to step forward, you hadn't taken your eyes off the tiny, helpless creature. No eyes, no mouth that would produce a single sound and from appearance alone, it relied on touch to navigate the world.

A single, lone worm was wriggling in the earth, and you felt you had more in common with it than any single person back at that waterfall. 

You can feel Jake's eyes on you, waiting for you to continue explaining. You know you have to. 

"Sometimes I meet people who think she's giving them permission, sanctioning them, to be mean to people. When really, they're just passing off owning their own mistakes. Or want to get out of circumstances of their own creation."

You sniff, pushing a piece of hair behind your ear. "Cause if she says it's okay, then why wouldn't it be?"

Jake's voice was low as he offered, "She can't help how people use her lyrics."

You closed your eyes, a tear streaming down your cheek. "Hasn't anyone ruined anything for you, Seresin? That's not the point."

Jake didn't say anything, merely staring at the side of your face. 

"Whether she knows it or intents it to be or not, she is an iconic Mean Girls Artist." You took a deep breath, opening your eyes and letting them glaze over. "And every time I try to make it better, I'm always brought back to the remarks whispered in the corners of high school hallways. Never being able to defend myself because first impressions are hard to beat. And word of mouth from a person who has their hooks in every person in your grade because you're the weird silent art kid with niche interests and they are the beloved popular girl matters more than any remark I could ever muster the courage to voice and prove them wrong."

Giving into the urge to hug yourself tight, you dropped your chin to your chest, a part of you wondering what Jake would do with this information. A part of you wanted to stop, but the fact that he was letting you speak, you weren't going to. With everything that had happened, you just wanted someone to listen. You just wanted to be heard.

Nat didn’t afford you that chance. But Jake was. He was here. He was listening. Perhaps for the first time since you don't remember when.

How fucking far have I fallen that Jake is suddenly now that person?

You sniffed again, wiping your nose. "I mean, it's not the fake ownership over them saying they might be the problem because of that one fucking song, but me, being the problem for saying anything, for being myself, walking the halls... existing." 

Holding yourself tight, you failed to notice the sad recognition in Jake's eyes. Or how his shoulders dropped or how he took his bottom lip between his teeth. 

“I only shouted ‘bear’ because I was trying to get Jessica and Veronica to leave me alone. Jessica’s… obvious... With her … attempts,” he admitted. “Well, unobvious to Rueben. I hate it.” 

You sniffed, wiping your eyes with the back of your arm. “You weren’t trying to scare me?” 

“No, Maeve, I wasn’t,” he replied earnestly. “It was stupid, and I should have just told them off, but I panicked. And a part of me wanted them to shit their pants… because of how they’ve been treating you. They seemed like the type who would…” 

You sighed, shaking your head, croaking out, “You really are an idiot, Jake.” 

He let out a small, humourless laugh. “Yeah, well... That’s nothing new.” 

You couldn’t help but laugh softly back. 

 "Thank you for telling me,” he finally said after a few moments of silence. 

 You reeled back, staring at him in shock. Out of all the things you expected him to say, that was not it. But Jake's familiar pattern of mocking you, hurling some insult, or trying to hit you where it hurts never came. Instead, he was looking at you like he was genuinely sorry. 

Another few seconds passed before you shook your head and swallowed. "I'm not entirely sure why I did. You're probably going to find some shitty way to use it against me or put it on that list you mentioned."

There was nothing mean in his voice when he shook his head, gently replying, "Not too bad to have on hand." 

You could hear the smile in his voice as he took a step forward, mud squishing under his boot as he took over leading the way. "If I ever do stand a chance of topping your wise-ass remarks."

Despite yourself, despite knowing you'd never see him again after you got out of this park, you let out a small smile as you followed after him.

"Keep dreaming, asshole."

Not so mean, are we now, Midge?

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Taglist -> I've been off on here, so if you've messaged or commented and I haven't seen it, please let me know, and I will add you as long as I'm still on this trail basis thing.

-Lucky ☘️

[nausicaamusiclover20]

perhaps you could do dave and james in the 90s, fighting over a girl, then she ends up with dave? fluff, smut and dave being all shocked and a bit insecure, considering his past with james? <3

I hope you like it!❤

Stay with me

It started like most nights did back then: music too loud, beer bottles scattered around, and the tang of cigarette smoke hanging in the air. I had always felt a little out of place in their world, like I was straddling some invisible line between awe and mischief. But there I was, caught between Dave and James, two titans of rock, and two men who couldn't be more different if they tried.

James had that easy confidence, the kind of swagger that came naturally to someone who’d been worshipped since his early twenties. He was charming, quick-witted, and devastatingly handsome in a rugged, all-American way. He made flirting seem effortless. Meanwhile, Dave… he was more of an enigma. There was a darkness to him, an edge that could either cut you or pull you in closer. He was magnetic, yes, but also a little volatile. And God, did he know how to brood.

I hadn’t planned on becoming a point of contention between them. Hell, when I first met them, I thought I was invisible in their eyes, just another face in the crowd. But something shifted over time. The way James’ hand would linger on my back when he told a joke. The way Dave’s piercing eyes would track my movements when he thought no one was looking. It was like walking a tightrope between two storms, each one threatening to pull me under in its own way.

It all came to a head one night after a show. The afterparty was winding down, the crowd thinning out until it was just the three of us in the dimly lit living room of some rented house. I was perched on the arm of the couch, nursing the last of my drink, when James sat down beside me, his arm slinging casually over my shoulders. The faint scent of his cologne mixed with the lingering smoke in the air, making my head spin slightly.

“You know,” he drawled, his breath warm against my ear, “Dave’s been staring at you all night. I don’t blame him.”

I glanced over at Dave, who was leaning against the far wall, his arms crossed tightly over his chest. His eyes met mine for a brief moment before he looked away, his jaw clenching so hard I thought he might crack a tooth.

“I think you’re imagining things,” I replied, trying to keep my voice light, even as my pulse quickened. James’ thumb traced absent circles on my shoulder, and I could feel the weight of Dave’s silence pressing against my chest. The air felt thick with tension, and I wasn’t sure if it was intoxicating or suffocating—maybe both.

“Am I?” James smirked, leaning in closer. His lips brushed against my cheek, dangerously close to crossing a line. My heart was pounding, but before I could decide how to react, Dave’s voice cut through the tension like a blade.

“Alright, that’s enough.”

I looked up to see him striding across the room, his movements sharp and deliberate. He grabbed James’ wrist, pulling it away from me with more force than necessary.

“She’s not some prize to fight over,” Dave snapped, his voice low and taut with barely restrained anger. His face was flushed, his eyes blazing with something raw and unguarded.

James raised an eyebrow, clearly amused by Dave’s reaction. “Calm down, man. Just having a little fun.”

“Yeah? Well, maybe you should find someone else to have fun with,” Dave shot back, his eyes flicking to me before quickly darting away.

The air between them crackled with unspoken tension, and for a moment, I thought they might actually come to blows. But then James backed off, raising his hands in mock surrender.

“Alright, alright. I’ll leave you two alone.” He stood, his gaze lingering on me for a beat longer than necessary before he sauntered out of the room, leaving me alone with Dave.

The silence that followed was heavy, almost deafening. I set my drink down, suddenly hyper-aware of the way Dave was pacing the room, his hand running through his hair in frustration. I could see the strain in his shoulders, the way he was holding himself back, and my heart ached at the sight of it.

“Dave,” I said softly, but he didn’t look at me.

“Sorry about that,” he muttered, his voice rough. “James is… well, you know how he is.”

“It’s not James I’m worried about,” I replied, standing and taking a tentative step toward him. “It’s you.”

His head snapped up at that, his eyes narrowing in confusion. “Me?”

“Yeah, you,” I said, my voice steady despite the storm of nerves swirling inside me. “You’ve been acting like… like you don’t even want to be in the same room as me half the time. And then tonight, you… you step in like you…”

“Like I what?” he challenged, his voice rising slightly. There was a sharp edge to his tone, but I could see the vulnerability behind it, the cracks forming in his armor.

“Like you care,” I finished, my voice barely above a whisper.

That seemed to knock the wind out of him. He stopped pacing, his shoulders slumping as he exhaled sharply. When he finally spoke, his voice was quieter, more vulnerable than I’d ever heard it.

“Of course I care,” he said, his gaze locking onto mine. “I care so much it’s… it’s fucking terrifying. You think it’s easy watching James flirt with you? Watching him act like he can just… take you, like it’s some kind of game?”

“Dave…”

“No, let me finish,” he said, taking a step closer. “You have no idea what it’s like to… to feel like you’re not good enough. Like someone else is always going to be better, funnier, more… more everything. And then you show up, and suddenly it’s like… like maybe I could have something good for once. But then James swoops in, and I… I don’t know how to deal with that.”

His words hung heavy in the air, raw and unfiltered. My heart ached at the vulnerability etched across his face, the way his usual bravado had crumbled to reveal the man underneath. I swallowed hard, trying to reconcile the man in front of me with the one who had made me feel invisible for so long. "Then why," I asked softly, my voice trembling, "did you make me think you didn’t like me? Why did you pull away like that?"

He let out a sharp breath, running a hand through his hair as if he was trying to steady himself. "You don’t get it," he muttered, his voice rough and low. "You think I’ve been acting like I don’t want you around? You’re wrong. I want you here so bad it… it scares the hell out of me."

I froze, his words sinking in like the final piece of a puzzle falling into place. He hesitated, glancing at me before looking away again, his jaw tightening. "I’ve messed up so much in my life, and the thought of screwing this up with you… it’s like I’m standing on the edge of a cliff. Every time I want to say something, I think, 'What if I ruin it? What if I’m not good enough for her?' So yeah, maybe I pull back, but it’s not because I don’t care. It’s because I care too much."

His voice cracked on the last words, and he finally looked at me, his eyes filled with a vulnerability that hit me like a wave. I stepped closer, my heart aching for the man in front of me. "Dave, you… you don’t have to be afraid of that," I said softly. "I’m not asking for perfect. I don’t want to be perfect. I just want you. And you don’t have to hold back anymore. I’m here because I want to be. With you."

For a moment, he didn’t say anything, just stared at me like he couldn’t quite believe what he was hearing. Slowly, I saw the tension in his shoulders ease as he took a shaky breath. "You mean that?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

I nodded, stepping even closer until I could feel the warmth radiating from him. "Yeah," I murmured. "I mean it."

You’ve already got my heart, even if you don’t think you deserve it.”

His eyes searched mine, as if he couldn’t quite believe what he was hearing. Slowly, hesitantly, he reached out, his fingers brushing against my cheek. The touch was so gentle, it made my breath hitch.

Something in him seemed to break then. His hand slid to the back of my neck, pulling me closer as his lips met mine in a kiss that was equal parts desperation and tenderness. It was like he was pouring every unspoken word, every hidden fear, into that moment, and I kissed him back just as fiercely, wanting to show him that he didn’t have to fight for my attention anymore. His lips were soft, yet insistent, and I could feel the tension in his body slowly melt away as he held me close.

When we finally pulled apart, his forehead rested against mine, his breath warm against my skin. His hands lingered on my waist, grounding both of us in the moment.

“You’re going to have to be patient with me,” he murmured, a small, almost shy smile tugging at his lips. There was a softness in his eyes now, a vulnerability he rarely let anyone see.

“Good thing I’m stubborn,” I replied, grinning up at him.

Dave pulled back slightly, his hands still resting on my waist as he gazed into my eyes, the softness in his expression still a little uncertain. His fingers gently brushed a strand of hair from my face, a small, almost imperceptible smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

"You know," he said, his voice low and teasing, "I think it’s time you go home with me."

I raised an eyebrow, my pulse quickening, though I kept my expression light. "Is that so?" I asked, my lips curling into a grin. "And why would I do that?"

His smile deepened, a mischievous twinkle lighting up his eyes. "Because you’re not the only one who's stubborn. And maybe you deserve to see how things feel when they’re done right."

I chuckled, the sound soft and warm, as the butterflies in my stomach fluttered wildly. "You think so?" I asked, my voice more playful than I'd expected it to be.

"Yeah," he murmured, leaning in just enough to brush his lips against my temple. "I think we’re both ready for the next step."

I could hear the sincerity in his voice, but there was also an undeniable shift—a quiet intensity that wasn’t there before. The chemistry between us had always been there, but now it felt like it was almost magnetic, pulling me toward him in ways that left me breathless. It was clear that neither of us was ready to pull back anymore.

I nodded, my lips pressing together as I felt the heat rise in my chest, matching the warmth in his hands. "Alright," I said softly, my voice steady, though my heart was racing. "Let’s go."

Without another word, he led the way, his hand slipping into mine as we left the dimly lit room behind. The air outside was cool against my skin, and I could feel the subtle hum of anticipation building in my veins as we walked to his car. Dave didn’t speak, but I could sense his energy—there was a quiet storm behind those dark eyes, one that seemed to mirror my own feelings.

As the door clicked shut behind us, the world outside seemed to fade away. The air in Dave's house felt heavy with anticipation, every touch between us like a spark, igniting something deeper.

He didn’t waste a second, his lips finding mine again, this time with a hunger that hadn’t been there before. His kiss was slow, deep, as though he was savoring the feeling of me—his hands tracing the line of my jaw, down my neck, sending shivers through me. I could feel the heat building between us, but it was a gentle burn, something that made my breath hitch and my body lean into him, needing more.

“God, you’re so beautiful,” he whispered between kisses, his lips brushing my cheek, then trailing down to my neck, where his mouth lingered, kissing me softly, tenderly. “I don’t think I’ve ever wanted anyone like this.”

I closed my eyes, feeling his breath warm against my skin, the feeling of his hands exploring me making my pulse quicken. He slid one hand around to my back, pulling me closer, pressing his chest to mine. My body responded instinctively, my hands threading into his hair, tugging him closer, desperate for more of him.

His lips found mine again, this time with a growing urgency, his kiss deepening, the need between us growing stronger. His hands moved lower, sliding down my sides, grazing the sensitive skin of my waist, making me gasp into his mouth. He pulled away slightly, his eyes dark with desire, but there was something in them—something gentle, like he was asking for permission.

“You’re so perfect,” he murmured, his voice hushed, almost reverent. “I want to make you feel so good, like you’ve never felt before.”

The way he said it made me shiver, the tenderness mixed with that raw, smoldering heat. I could feel myself melting into him, the tension between us building with every soft touch, every whispered word. I nodded, my heart racing as his hands traced the curve of my waist, then slid slowly up, caressing the sides of my ribs, feeling the rise and fall of my breath.

“I need you,” I whispered back, my voice barely audible, but full of need.

His lips curled into a soft smile, and for a moment, he just looked at me, his hands resting on my hips, grounding me as his gaze softened. “You have me,” he whispered, his voice like a promise.

And then, as if some invisible barrier had been lifted, he moved with a quiet confidence, gently pushing me toward the bed, his lips trailing a slow path from my mouth to my neck, then lower, kissing and nipping at the sensitive skin of my collarbone. I gasped, my body arching toward him, urging him on.

“Dave,” I breathed, the sound of his name a plea on my lips. I felt him smile against my skin, his hands slipping under my shirt, slowly lifting it off, his touch burning as he exposed more of my skin to his hungry gaze.

“You’re so soft,” he murmured, his fingers grazing the smoothness of my skin, sending sparks of electricity through my body. He kissed me again, softly at first, before his hands moved to my waist, his fingertips brushing the edges of my panties, his touch teasing, making my body hum with anticipation.

He pulled away just enough to look at me, his eyes dark with desire but soft, full of affection. “Tell me if you want me to stop,” he whispered, his lips brushing against mine, just enough to leave me aching for more.

I shook my head, my hands gripping his shirt, pulling him closer. “I want you, Dave,” I breathed, my voice filled with longing.

The way he looked at me—like I was the only thing that mattered in that moment—was all I needed. He kissed me again, deeper this time, and with a deliberate slowness, he undid the button of my jeans, his fingertips grazing the skin of my stomach as he slowly worked them down my legs. I shivered, not from the cool air, but from the heat of his touch, the way he was making every inch of my skin burn with need.

“God, you’re killing me,” he muttered, his lips trailing down my body, kissing each inch of exposed skin with worshipful tenderness, his hands now exploring me with more confidence. When his lips finally reached the top of my thigh, he paused, looking up at me with a smile that was both devilish and gentle.

“I want to hear you,” he whispered, his voice low, teasing. “Tell me what you want.”

My heart raced, my chest heaving with anticipation. “I want you to touch me… everywhere,” I breathed, the words slipping out before I could stop them.

He groaned, his lips pressing against the sensitive skin of my inner thigh, his fingers sliding under the waistband of my panties, teasing me just enough to make me ache for more. “You’re so fucking perfect,” he murmured against me, his voice rough with desire.

And then, he moved lower, his lips and hands tracing every inch of me with an intensity that made my head spin. I couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, just feeling the warmth of his hands on my skin, the heat of his mouth making my entire body shudder with each tender, possessive touch.

When he finally joined me fully, the world seemed to fall away, leaving only the connection between us, the unspoken words, the mutual surrender. His body pressed against mine, moving with a slow, deliberate rhythm, each motion both tender and full of longing, like he was savoring every second, every moment of us being together.

I kissed him again, this time with all the passion I’d been holding back, and he responded just as fiercely, his hands tracing the curve of my back, holding me close as if he couldn’t bear to let go.

When it was over, the room filled with the sound of our breathing, slow and steady, the intimacy between us palpable. I rested against him, feeling the weight of his arms around me, grounding me, keeping me safe in the afterglow.

As we lay there, the quiet of the room enveloping us, Dave pulled me closer, his arms wrapping around me as if he couldn’t bear the thought of letting go. His breath was warm against the back of my neck, the soft thrum of his heartbeat steady and comforting against my skin.

"Stay here," he whispered, his voice rough with the vulnerability that only seemed to surface when he was this close, when we were tangled together like this.

I turned slightly, my eyes meeting his, and saw the softness in his gaze, the intensity of everything unsaid between us. “I’m not going anywhere, Dave,” I whispered back, my voice steady, full of reassurance.

He didn’t say anything at first, but I felt the tension in his body ease as he pulled me closer, as if drawing me into him wasn’t enough. He wanted to make sure I was there, with him, for as long as he could hold me. His lips brushed my forehead gently, the touch tender and almost reverent.

“I don’t want you to leave,” he murmured, his voice thick with the weight of the words. “I don’t want this to end.”

I smiled softly, the warmth of his embrace making my chest swell with something that felt like peace. "It doesn’t have to end, Dave. I’m here. I’m right here with you."

With that, he pulled me closer still, his chest rising and falling against my back as he held me, like he was afraid I might slip away if he let go. His hands, gentle but firm, caressed my arms, the skin of my back, as if memorizing the feel of me beneath his touch.

“Promise me,” he whispered, his voice thick, his breath warm against my skin. “Promise me you’ll stay.”

“I promise,” I breathed, closing my eyes as I settled deeper into his embrace, my own arms folding around his, grounding both of us in the moment. His scent, the warmth of his body, it all wrapped around me like a protective cocoon.

And there, in the quiet darkness of his room, we found solace. It wasn’t the kind of promise that needed words to seal it—it was understood in the silence, in the way we held each other. He pulled the covers over us, and for the first time in a long time, I felt truly at peace.

Dave’s arms tightened around me, pulling me even closer, and I could feel the slow, rhythmic beat of his heart as we drifted into the stillness of sleep. Neither of us spoke again, but I could feel the weight of his feelings in the air between us—something real, something strong.

"I’m not going anywhere, Dave," I whispered one last time before sleep took over, the words a promise that echoed softly in the quiet room.

And with that, we drifted off together, wrapped in each other’s warmth, the world outside forgotten.

[softlymaximoff]

Yes, your Highness

18+ ONLY! MEN & MINORS DNI (blank blogs will be blocked you do not have my permission to republish my work onto any platform.

A/N: I’m obsessed with any wanda variant I need help, also this is way shorter than intended and no smut just dynamic play soooo I’m sorry and have fun hopefully you like it

Summary: your princess has had enough of your attitude and isn’t afraid to let everybody know who you belong to.

Characters: Dark!Princess! Wanda, Gn!Reader

Warnings: degrading, humiliation, violence (if you squint I think?), corruption, mind control, pet play, Dom/sub dynamics, choking, breath play, objectifying.

Word Count: 846 😭

"How hard is it to just try and look like you’re grateful for once!" Wanda seethed as she pulled you away from the ballroom. "Wanda it's not my fault your daddy doesn't like me! He’s some mean old prick who hates everyone who even looks at you" You snapped but whimpered as her grip tightened on your arms. "Don't you ever talk about my daddy like that again Y/n. You could cost me the throne you moron!” A sharp slap echoed the hallways and you choked on a broken gasp. Your eyes filled with light tears as you kept your mouth shut, you knew not to talk back. She was in her element and her eyes were slowly darkening to their reddish-hue.

“You are nothing but a stable hand, a dirty peasant, a street rat and if it wasn’t for my daddy, the King, took pity on you you would be fed to the pigs. Do I make myself clear Y/n?” She grabbed your cheeks between her thumb and pointer finger forcing you to slightly part your lips. “Yes, your Highness” you whispered out and almost whined when she let go and rested a hand on the base of your neck. “Speak up dog” her voice was cold and sent chills down your spine.

“Yes you make yourself clear your Highness” you spoke a little louder and she rolled her eyes. “Pathetic. Utterly pathetic” she grumbled and attached her lips to your neck sucking angry marks along your jawline. “I won’t hesitate to make a scene out there to show everyone how ungrateful you really are. Throwing dirty looks at people who are just trying to be nice to their princess” she threatened and you couldn’t help but huff at her words. “Pets don’t speak, what has gotten into your dumb little brain today” she pulled back and searched your eyes to see if you were pushing her buttons purposely or if you were really upset over something.

“Speak mutt, what’s wrong” she raised an eyebrow and you just whined, a moan threatening to escape as she ran a thumb over the many forming bruises along your throat and clavicle. “My princess” You stumbled lightly over your words and looked away when she pursed her lips. “You’re even more pathetic than I thought. Of course I’m yours you silly toy” she smiled softly for a brief moment before steeling her eyes once again.

“Now do I have to ask again, how fucking hard is it to pretend you’re getting along with my father” she narrowed her eyes and grabbed the base of your neck, pushing you against the walls of the open hallway. You whimpered when her hand squeezed with a little more force than normal and she kicked your legs apart, pushing her knee in between them. “You’re such a stupid mutt. So easy to whore yourself out for your princess” she mumbled before she kissed you. Dominating the kiss and biting down on your lipstick covered lips, she sucked harshly drawing a little blood.

“Wanda” you pleaded desperately and rolled your hips as her eyes glowed a deep red. “Shut up” she growled and applied more pressure, almost cutting your breathing off. You eyes slipped shut and you parted your lips for a brief moment and she used that to her advantage, shoving two fingers in. “Suck” She demanded softly and you did just that. “My good pet” She hummed and you looked up at her all doe-eyed.

“Who knew a street rat could be such a good dog for royalty” she chuckled darkly and took her fingers out. Her eyes were now completely red, all traces of green lost. “Huh? My dumb little pet ready to submit. All brainless and needy” her magic floating heavily through your thoughts. You were nothing but a poor lowlife and you were so deeply grateful for everything the kingdom had offered you. A low throaty whine sounded out in the hallway and your knees buckled. “I think we should let everyone know who you belong to” She pulled away from you and took the sight in.

You had an angry handprint disguising itself as a choker collar, your hair was neatly dishevelled from its up-do from earlier and your lipstick was smeared. “You’re mine” she growled before walking towards the common ballroom, your wrists trapped tightly in a single hand of hers. “People of the Kingdom, Mother, Father, I have an announcement to make” She declared and pulled you out in front of her, showing you off like a prized hunt.

“Y/n will no longer be service of the Kingdom but of me. She is to be my pet, my dog, my toy, what ever title I see fit until the sun stops shining on our land. Daddy I know you don’t like her that much but I promise you I won’t let her get out of hand” she finished with a stern nod and turned to you. You were hers. Completely hers and you were to be forever grateful her kingdom spared your life.

<><><>

Tag list: @youresuchamom @yelenasdiary @cromaximoff @deadlynightshade418

[makeitmingi]

Cause Baby You’re My Muse [Chapter 4]

Genre: Romance, Idol!AU, Music, Slight angst

Pairing: Mingi x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Producer!Reader, IdolLyricist!Mingi, IdolProducer!Hongjoong, Idol!Seonghwa, Idol!Yunho, Idol!Wooyoung, Idol!San, Idol!Yeosang, Idol!Jongho, cameo(s) by other celebrities

Summary: You always preferred producing underground, having an unknown face and governed by your own rules. But when you start freelancing for idol groups, you say goodbye to your lone wolf lifestyle as you learn to work with idol producers and lyricists.

Word count: 3.2K

‘Producer Indigo! Where are you? Are you playing hooky? If so, why was I not invited? - Wooyoung’

You yawned as you looked over at the message from Wooyoung. You have been at KQ for about two weeks already and the boys have all become friends with you. But you had a closer friendship with Hongjoong and Wooyoung compared to the rest.

‘Was working the whole night... Had a meeting end at 11 then have just been working non stop. Didn’t want to lose track of what was discussed for the track. - Indigo’

‘Wait, you’ve been working since 11?! Do you know it’s 10 am now?! - Wooyoung’

‘It is...? Oh, I didn’t even notice. - Indigo’

After meetings, you liked to work immediately, to not lose that creative high. Last night was your first meeting with the JYP producers ater signing the contract with them to produce one of their artist’s songs.

‘Wooyoung just yelled, saying that he can’t believe you have been working for close to 12 hours. You should go to sleep.- Hongjoong’

Yes, you did want to sleep. But first, you needed some food in your system. You went to the kitchen to make yourself some toast because that was what you were craving, toast with jam and butter. And an iced latte since caffeine didn’t have an effect on you. You leaned against the counter to eat your toast, your brain just blank. 

‘Yes, captain. Eating then straight to bed after. - Indigo.’

You sent a picture of your half eaten toast to Hongjoong. He replied with a thumbs up sticker. It was weird, you’ve never shared so much of your life with others before but it was strangely fun to do so with them.

‘Could you come do your drum beat in the studio tomorrow? I did a bit of alteration and cleaning, all we need to do is add your beat. - Indigo’

‘Ah, you should honestly be focusing on refueling and resting for now instead of tomorrow’s work. But I have a schedule tomorrow. I’ll pop by around 4? - Hongjoong’

‘Sounds good. See you. And also, I have to plan for tomorrow because you could be busy with schedules. - Indigo’

After doing the dishes, you went to save your work in your studio and turn off your system. Then you washed up and dived straight into bed. 

RINGGGG

“Hello...?” You drowned out, close to falling asleep.

“Oh, good. You’re resting. Indigo, you can’t keep pulling all nighters like that, it is not good for your health. I know work is important but if get sick, you won’t be able to work for even longer periods of time. Hongjoong hyung always tells us to take care of our bodies.” Wooyoung rambled.

“Right...” You were having a hard time paying attention to him, sleep threatening to consume you the moment your head had touched the pillow. But you were grateful he was concerned for you.

“Wooyoung ah, I think she’s falling asleep already and can’t focus on your nagging.” You heard San in the background. 

“I’ll take him away now, Indigo. Sleep well~” You now heard San’s voice clearly while Wooyoung was yelling.

“Thanks, San... I’ll talk to you later, Wooyoung...” You trailed off as the call cut and you closed your eyes, finally letting sleep take over you. You didn’t know how long you slept for but the sun had set by the time you woke up.

‘Hey! It has been a while since we’ve met up. The boys and I are going for drinks tonight, would you like to come? We can all catch up. - Dean’

The invite came in while you were making dinner, Considering how you haven’t met them for a while, you agreed.

‘There might be press, just be careful. But it’s all familiar faces tonight. - Dean’

He assured you. Despite being older than you, you knew Dean from way back, when you first starting out. Meeting and working with Korean R&B and Hip hop artists was a lot more common than you would expect. And you clicked with Dean immediately, his appreciation for privacy helped him protect your identity from the press. 

‘Thanks for the heads up. They probably heard that you’ve emerged from hiding or something. - Indigo’

Keeping it simple, you wore a black cocktail dress with a leather jacket over your shoulders. To accompany that, you wore some boots. You called a cab and left the house to go to the club.

“Name?” The bouncer asked when you arrived.

“Indigo.” You replied. He shot you a skeptical look, taking in your mask figure. But he nodded and stepped aside for you the enter. 

“VIP is upstairs.” He told you. You gave him a thumbs up and turned to the staircase, away from the other patrons on the first level. Just like Dean said, it was all familiar faces. 

“There she is. Indigo.” Dean smiled, drinking in hand, and came over to give you a big hug.

“It has been a while, Hyuk. How are you?” You asked as you wrapped your arms around him with a laugh. 

“I’m good, it’s been great having a break from everything. What about you? I heard you’re working with KQ now?” He held your shoulders after pulling away. You nodded your head with a sheepish smile. 

“Just freelancing for them.” You said as you both sat down.

“Well, it’s always good to expand your circle and earn experience.” He smiled, handing you a drink with a straw. You clinked glasses with him and took a sip. After that, you proceeded to greet your other friends that were there, having a quick catch up with all of them.

“How has it been working with idols?” 

“Not that bad. I can’t say that all idols are like that but this group is full of hardworking people. They’re always in the studio working and they have good input.” You shrugged.

“Edenary has some good people. And I hear the leader of that group is quite the budding producer.” Dean said.

“Yeah, Hongjoong. He is talented, has producing potential.” You nodded your head. Dean smiled, he was glad you were getting to know more people and you seemed to really like Ateez from the way you were talking about them. 

“I’m proud of you. All your hardwork is getting paid off.” He patted your head and you blushed. 

“I’m going out back for a smoke.” Dean stood up, hands tucked into his pockets. You followed him even though you don’t smoke. 

RINGGGGG

“Excuse me. Let me take this.” You stepped aside to answer the phone. Dean nodded his head, busy typing on his phone as he smoked. When you took your phone out of your pocket, you were not expecting to see a call from Mingi, usually only Hongjoong and Wooyoung would contact you outside of working hours and at such an hour.

“Want to come for movie night?” 

“With you?” You choked, not expecting that. Dean shot you a weird look but you waved him off. 

“Yes? And the boys..At our dorm. I know it’s very last minute notice and we’ll understand if you can’t make it. They just suddenly decided during dinner just now.”

“Don’t worry. The thing is... I’m busy now... Is tomorrow okay?” You asked. On the other side, you heard whispering and assumed Mingi was asking the other boys if they were okay with tomorrow night instead.

“I’m done. Want me to stay here with you until you’re done?” Dean came to you. You pulled the phone away from your ear temporarily.

“No, go ahead. I should be finishing up soon.” You told him. He nodded and headed back in while you pressed the phone to your ear to continue speaking to Mingi. But it was silent.

“Mingi...? You there?” 

“Oh... yeah... The others said they’re fine with tomorrow since you’ll be meeting Hongjoong hyung in the studio. You can just come over with him. Sorry for bothering you.”

“It’s oka-” You didn’t even get to reply before he hung up. Blinking in confusion, you looked at the phone. With a shrug, you put your phone back into your pocket and went back into the club. But you didn’t stay long since it was late and you had to work tomorrow.

“Oppa, can we take a picture with you? Please.” Some girls came up to Dean as you were all exiting. This was your chance to slip away before anyone could notice you or take a picture of you hanging out with Dean. 

“Tell Hyuk I’ll head back on my own. I’ll see you guys soon.” You exchanged hugs with them.

“Don’t be a stranger, Indigo.” They waved. 

On the way home, you did send a text to Dean and another when you arrived home. You took a shower and made some ramen which was always good after a night of drinks. 

-

Since you didn’t drink a lot last night, you were able to wake up and not be hung over. Coffee in hand, you entered KQ. 

“Good morning. There were some packages for you that came in yesterday. They have been delivered to your studio.” The security guard said. You nodded your head and bowed before going upstairs. There were some packages outside of your studio door. You unlocked the door, holding it open with your foot as you dragged each parcel in. 

“Oh.” You unwrapped the acrylic album boxes to put and display your signed albums, as well as some other things to put in your studio. But then, your phone started buzzing.

‘We got caught, Indigo. Sorry. - Dean’

‘Thankfully it’s not breaking news so I think we’re fine. And no one seems to guess or suspect that it’s you. I’ll damage control if you need. - Dean’

Following his message were links to some article, a mysterious girl being photographed with Dean at the club last night. 

‘Who is that?’

‘He comes out of hiatus to show his girlfriend off?’

‘I saw them last night but they were all in a big group and she stood with the rest. Maybe they’re all just friends?’

There were a few comments but not much. Probably because it was common for underground artists to be in relationship and get married. You sighed, leaning back in your chair as you read the comments. Thankfully, no one suspected that it was ‘Prod. Indigo’.

“And they ask why I want to remain a ghost.” You clicked your tongue and left your phone aside to turn on your computer systems. After that, you were only focused on your work.

Besides working on your own projects, you had some meetings throughout the day, with Edenary and with some other company representatives. 

“No one recognised you but just be careful, okay Indigo? Especially since you’re now hanging out with Ateez.” Eden advised.

“It was really just hanging with friends. There was a group of us.” You scratched your head.

“I understand and while you’re not under KQ’s contract and rules, it’s for your safety. Especially if we are protecting your identity.” Eden smiled empathetically. You just nodded, knowing he was in a difficult spot too. 

“I will be more careful.” You assured. You gathered your things and left the studio to continue working, 

“Hmmmm~ Please work out, my melody~” You sang and hummed the melody to yourself out loud as you worked, wheeling your chair between the computer, the MIDI board and your syntehsizer as you needed. When you were done with one section, you would play it back to yourself and make any changes if necessary. Then your doorbell rang.

“Coming!” You removed your headphone and quickly saved your files before wearing your mask and going to answer the door. Poking your head out, you blinked at Hongjoong.

“Hongjoong...?” 

“We were supposed to meet at 4? Remember?” He tilted his head with a smile, laughing at your confused expression. 

“Oh! I did not realise that it was 4 already. Please come in.” You let him into the studio. That was when you noticed Mingi behind him. Mingi stiffly bowed to you and you felt the need to bow back to him.

“I hope you don’t mind but Mingi wanted to tag along.” Hongjoong told you. 

“Sure. Have a seat. The more input the better.” You chuckled and walked back to your desk. Hongjoong grabbed a stool to sit beside you at the desk.

“But I don’t know anything about producing.” Mingi spoke.

“That’s okay. I will gladly accept any opinion and input, it’s still in the experimental stage anyway.” You smiled through your eyes to him before turning back to the computer. 

“There’s still space here. It’ll be better to listen from a closer distance.” You pointed to the spot on your other side after noticing that Mingi sat on the couch at the back. He nodded and grabbed a stool to sit. But unlike Hongjoong, he sat a little further back instead of right beside you.

“So I’ll let you listen to the revised stuff. There’s not much of a change so I think the additional remix beats can still work. The only thing I did was put more emphasis on the guitar rather than the piano.” You explained.

“Okay. Mingi ah, maybe you can come up with some lyrics too.” Hongjoong nodded over to the tall male, who nodded his head, as you clicked around to find the folder in your computer.

“Oh right. You’re the lyricist.” You remembered what Hongjoong told you when you first met him. You played the music and he swayed along. 

“Just have fun with it and experiment.” You told him. 

“Alright. Let’s go.” Hongjoong pulled his sleeves up and began to work. The atmosphere became very serious with all of you focusing on your task. Even Mingi was leaning forward, a serious look on his face. 

“I would try it with less bass and more snare.” Hongjoong said after listening to the track. 

“Go ahead.” You nodded to him to start. 

After working for a while, you decided to take a break. You grabbed a drink from the mini fridge you finally had set up in your studio. You encouraged the two males to choose their own drinks since there were different kinds in there. Then you all sat down together, with them on the couch and you still in your comfy working chair, to talk. 

“Are you okay? We saw the news article... That was you, right? With Dean sunbaenim.” Hongjoong asked.

“Oh yeah. It’s not a big deal. We’re friends but haven’t seen each other in a bit so we all met up as a group. At least no one recognised it as me. I mean, you guys would have because you kind of know what I look like.” You laughed.

“That’s a relief.” Mingi said.

“Thank you for your concern though. But there’s no need to worry.” You assured, assuming Mingi was referring to you being safe despite the news. 

“We didn’t know you were friends with underground artists. Dean subaenim is very popular and talented.” Hongjoong said.

“I mean, I’ve worked with them a lot more. But Hyuk, he kind of helped me when I was first starting out since he was older and has a lot more experience. So I feel grateful to him.” You shrugged. The two nodded their heads. 

“Other than that, you’ve been here for 2 weeks. How has it been?” Hongjoong changed the subject.

“It’s been good. Not much has changed work wise. But I really appreciate how welcoming all of you have been and the care you have shown despite only knowing me for two weeks.” You said shyly.

“Of course, as long as you’re comfortable here. Like San said, we’re all family here. We help each other out and care for one another.” Hongjoong smiled warmly, making you feel even more embarrassed. You were not always the best with expressing feelings and emotions. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever had someone care so much for me before.” You said in passing with a laugh. But the sad looks Hongjoong and Mingi sent you made you retract your statement.

“Ah, no! I don’t- I’m not saying I-” You shook your hands as you grew flustered.

“It’s okay.” Mingi comforted. You chewed on your bottom lip behind your mask, clearing your throat awkwardly.

“W-We should get back to work if we want to end soon.” You pointed to the desk, immediately turning around and wheeling yourself back, so they wouldn’t see your face and you wouldn’t have to meet their eyes. 

You continued to work with Hongjoong as he fine tuned it. Even if he was just adding a beat, you admired how focused and determined he was. He was a perfectionist.

“So, any lyric ideas yet?” Your question was directed at Mingi after seeing him type away on his phone. Your eyes remained on the screen as you added Hongjoong’s beat with some editing.

“Is this an Ateez song?” He blinked.

“It can be. Nothing is set in stone. Just wanted to know if you were inspired or something. Or think there’s a theme to go with the song.” You shrugged. 

“I only asked that because if it is an Ateez song, I would have to write lyrics that can reflect all the members like their style of conveying words. It is different if I was writing for someone else or for myself.” He explained. You nodded your head, processing his rationale. It did make sense and you felt bad for assuming he meant anything negative. 

“I’ve never written lyrics before. It feels too... personal.” You chuckled. 

“You’ve never tried?” Hongjoong asked.

“Of course I’ve tried. Some entertainment companies want the whole package, beat, melody and lyrics for their artists to use. But I think similar to what Mingi said, it’s... for the lack of a better word, vulnerable.” You said.

“I agree. I think there’s a perception that we just pour feelings onto paper and write out whatever emotional line there is. But we also have to know what feelings to separate.” Mingi added.

“Alright, let’s listen to this again.” You pressed play and the 3 of you listened intently. Only when it ended, you saw the smile on Hongjoong’s face.

“I think we got it.” He chuckled. You nodded in agreement excitedly. When music works well, it is one of the most satisfying, heart warming, rewarding thing ever. 

“It’s great. I like it.” Mingi nodded in approval. 

“Good job.” Hongjoong reached out and patted your head, a soft smile on his head. It was something you grew comfortable with him doing. He was really like an older brother and working with him was a breeze, considering the two of you had similar working styles and personalities. 

“It’s thanks to you two. Ah, I’m so happy.” You leaned your head back with a blissful sigh.

“I didn’t do anything. It was all you and the captain.” Mingi shook his head. 

“Your thoughts and opinions helped improve it, Mingi ah. It was good that you tagged along today.” Hongjoong said and you nodded. You saw Mingi blush at Hongjoong’s words, looking away shyly. 

~

Series Masterlist

[sunshinesickies]

I wanted to post this while it’s still her birthday, I’ll edit it later. Enjoy my first Cara fic! 🫶 Cara Ward x Female Reader sickfic

Best Girlfriend Award

“I’ll be right over, thanks for calling Gnomes.” You’re already grabbing your car keys as you hang up on your girlfriend’s older sister. You’d already been worried about Cara since you haven’t heard from her today. After everything that happened with her father, your girlfriend has started having days where she can’t get out of bed, or she’ll skip school, or shut herself in her room. Once, after not hearing from her for a whole weekend only to find she’d neglected herself the whole time, didn’t eat, sleep etc, you’d made her promise she’d at least text you every day, even on the bad ones. It could be one word, an emoji even, so you know that if she doesn’t, something’s really truly off.

The drive doesn’t take long and soon you’re pulling into the driveway, quickly getting out and knocking on the door. Naomi answers with a solemn smile, pulling you into a quick hug before leading you up the stairs to Cara’s room. “She hasn’t been out all day. Barely saw her yesterday too. She won’t answer for me but I know she will for you.” You nod giving Naomi a quiet ‘thanks’ before gently knocking on your girlfriend’s door.

“Cara, babes, it’s me.” You call through her door only to be met with silence. You knock a couple more times before using the key Cara had given you. It’s the only one that opens this door and you always have it with you.

You let yourself in, immediately getting engulfed in darkness, the lights off and the shades closed. As your eyes adjust to the lack of light, you start to see the outline of your girlfriend flopped on her bed, looking as if she’d been swallowed by the blankets. “Cara?” You step closer, listening to the steady sound of her breathing which very subtly changes rhythm when you sit down on the side of the bed.

You smirk softly. “I know you’re awake, Car.” Your finger nudges at her blanketed form and she sighs, muttering something about you being too observant. You sit in silence for a moment, waiting for any additional response.

“You gonna tell me what’s up or…” The blankets rustle slightly as you lay down on your back next to her, looking up at the void currently replacing the ceiling. You’ve uncovered over time that sometimes it’s best to wait for Cara to come to you, so you usually try to meet her in the middle. Your only response is a grunt as she scoots further from you. A frown forms on your face. Your girlfriend’s just about the clingiest person you’ve ever met and she never passes up on cuddles. It’s also one of your favorite things about her.

Cara may be tricky sometimes, but reading her is the easiest thing in the world for you. “Baby, what’s wrong?” You hum earnestly, putting a gentle hand on her shoulder. In the quiet moments before she answers, you can hear the faintest sniffles. “Nothing it’s ju..ust…” She tries her hardest to stave off the tickle in her nose, knowing the jig will be up in a matter of seconds. Instead, realization hits you when her words are cut off with one soft sneeze muffled into the pillow. You feel her body shake under your palm.

“Bless you.” You rub your thumb along her hoodie-clad shoulder. Cara lets out a louder sniffle. “Why didn’t you tell me, love?” You almost whisper and the softness in your tone finally gets her to turn over to face you. You’re not disappointed, nor are you mad, she knows this. Somehow, maybe because you know each other so well, she knows it’s a genuine question. Your hand moves to cup her cheek which you immediately notice to be much warmer than it should be.

“I-I didn’t want to be a bu…” Her eyes close as she pauses. “…I’m sorry.” She mumbles with a tired sigh. You hum, thumb brushing along her smooth skin. “Cara.” Her name is almost a whisper on your lips and her eyes flutter open. You stare into her deep brown eyes, recognizing her familiar gaze of love, though exhaustion threatens to overwhelm it.

“You will never be a burden to me. Ever.” Your words are so loving, so sincere that she can’t help it when her frown slides into a small smile as a couple small tears roll down her face. “I know.” Her voice is thick and raw. You lean closer and her eyes slip close once more as she soaks in the comforting warmth of your lips as you place a gentle, lingering kiss to her forehead.

When you lean back her eyes are still closed as you use your thumb to brush away a few extra tears from her cheeks. While being vulnerable with each other is something you’ve definitely gotten used to, especially in the past few months, there are still moments when Cara has trouble with it. Even though in most cases there’s nothing else she wants other than you and your touch, she sometimes tries to appear fine if something’s bothering her, especially things like being sick or things she says “aren’t worth it” since she knows she’s been through worse. But each and every time, you remind her that the world doesn’t have to be ending for her to deserve your love and care. You’re there for her, from her worst moments to silly little paper cuts and everything in between, like she is for you.

“You feel really warm, sweets. Have you checked for a fever?” It’s a pointless question to ask, you both know she has one, but the words slip out anyways. “no.” She mumbles back and you offer her a small smile. “How ‘bout I go grab the thermometer and let Naomi know what’s up? She’s worried about you.” Cara frowns at your words—she hates worrying her older sister, but she nods, knowing she hasn’t been fair to her by not telling her either. She opens her mouth but you shake your head.

“You have nothing to be sorry for, for either of us. We just care about you.” You kiss her flushed cheek before getting up. “Be right back.” You promise as you let yourself out of her room. Cara watches you leave, feeling totally pissed that she’s sick, but also grateful and glad to have you. You always make her feel better, and when you can’t you always stay with her until she does.

Cara���s not sure how long you’re gone for. When you left she checked her phone, realizing how late in the day it was. She really didn’t mean to ignore you, she’d fallen asleep early last night and has been in and out of a sleepy-fevered delirium since.

Finally she hears your light steps on the stairs. She’s memorized the sound by heart. Her bones ache and her head spins but she sits up in bed when you walk in balancing a tray with a spattering of random items. The sight makes her smile and her chest feels a little lighter now that you’re back.

“Well you are officially the slowest person on the planet.” She rasps while you set the tray on the end of her bed and sit cross legged in front of her. She rolls her eyes playfully when you scoff, pretending to be offended. “I wasn’t even gone ten minutes!” You defend. “Plus, I had to collect all the essentials for a sick day.” You block her vision of the tray as she tries to see what you brought.

“Patience! Here, this first.” You reach behind you and reveal a thermometer like you said you’d get. Your girlfriend gives you a playful glare but opens her mouth without protest and you place it gently under her tongue, letting her hold the small instrument as you bring the tray to sit between you.

“Now since you can’t interrupt…I’ve got tissues, lozenges, water, Gatorade, medicine, snacks, oh and I made your favorite tea with honey and lemon.” You proudly show her all your goodies as she watches you with soft eyes. “I fear if you aren’t completely hydrated by the end of the day I will no longer hold the ‘best girlfriend’ title.” You add, joking with a light chuckle as you lean closer when Cara takes the thermometer out of her mouth at the beep.

“Um first of all…” She clears her throat. “…I clearly hold first prize for your totally not imaginary award.” Your eyes roll playfully at her retort. “And secondly, I fear I might be too hydrated by the end of today…” She smiles before her tone softens and her face falls serious. “But thank you, y/n. I mean it. I suppose, as much as you know I love a good debate, I think you win.” It’s her turn to roll her eyes as you pump your fist in the air in victory with a shit-eating grin like the adorable dork you are.

“Does that mean you’ll…” You hold up the fever reducing meds and shake them in front of her. While being silly is in your natures and the two of you try and keep things light as often as you can, the high fever displayed on the thermometer worries you. She takes it from you. “Fine, but you have to let me have the good crisps (chips).”

You nod at her fair request as she takes the meds and you get up, moving to dig up some spare pjs you often leave in her drawers for when you’re lounging around her house. When you crawl back in bed with her, Cara holds up the blanket so you can crawl underneath. She immediately snuggles into your side and you hand her the hot tea. Your arm wraps around her shoulder, holding her warmth close to you as she sniffles and takes a long sip.

The thought of possibly getting sick too is just about the furthest thing from your mind, the two of you have always taken care of each other when sick and have agreed that neither of you care about the possible repercussions, you just care too much about each other for that to be important.

You sit for a while, talking, laughing and just enjoying each other. You can’t recall when your hand starts to soothingly run through her soft hair but eventually you offer to braid it for her because you know she loves it when you do. After that you lay down further into the covers. Cara yawns and while you know its best her for to get more sleep, you easily give in when she begs you to watch a show with her. You’ve never been able to resist those wide, deep puppy-dog eyes.

After a few episodes though, Cara’s eyes start to droop and when you finally turn off your phone, she doesn’t protest. Instead she just curls further into your arms, closing her tired eyes. You tuck your hand under her hoodie, fingers beginning to gently dance along the smooth skin of her back. “Y’know…” She mumbles against your chest. “…you definitely win.” She whispers in a sleepy daze, her voice low and soft and a little raspy. You can’t help but melt as her adorableness.

“I don’t know, love, I’d argue it’s a tie.” You murmur back with a kiss to her hair. Cara chuckles softly. “I love you.” She hums, drifting off to sleep almost immediately, but not before she hears your soothing whisper in the dark echoing her sweet sentiments. You smile, closing your own eyes when you feel your girlfriend finally fall into her much needed rest. The both of your hearts beating low and rhythmic as you both know you’re home in each other’s embrace.

[fallingdownhell]

Zhongli x fem reader's first time 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

Now this will be interesting👀

Pairing: Zhongli x female reader

Content: female bodied reader; she/her pronouns for reader; virginity loss; first time; praise; penetration; use of nicknames; a little bit of overstimulation; multiple orgasms

Word count: 1,7k words

Have fun reading! I know I did while writing this..

Minors do NOT interact!

You threw your head back into the pillow as you felt another one of his fingers enter you, adding a bit more to your pain.

The intrusion felt foreign, it wasn't like anything you have ever felt before, making you feel uncomfortable.

A single tear escaped your eyes, rolling down your cheek. Not even a second after, you felt Zhongli's soft lips on your cheek, kissing the tear away.

"Are you alright, darling? Do you need me to stop?", he asked you, leaning closer to you, studying your face and reactions thoroughly. You managed to open your eyes, looking at him.

His eyes held so much love and adoration for you. You knew that if you were to ask him to stop this, he would do so, no questions asked, no matter how much he was yearning for release himself.

You could see through the outlines of his pants how hard he was, clearly turned on by this. Apart from his pants, he was naked as well, only keeping them on to not pressure you into doing anything you didn't want to do, as well as to not intimidate you with his size.

You took a few deep breaths in and out, before shaking your head.

"N-no.. I want to.. keep going.", you said with a shaky voice, the pain gradually ebbing off, turning into pleasure instead.

Zhongli didn't move again immediately. Instead, he took a few more moments to look at you, confirming that you actually meant it, before he began moving his two long fingers inside of you again, moving them in and out in a slow, steady pace.

You closed your eyes again at the feeling, squinting them as you threw an arm over your mouth, trying to stiffle the noises that threatened to escape you. It would have worked if it weren't for Zhongli suddenly attacking your sensitive neck with his own lips, kissing the skin there.

A soft moan slipped past your lips and you started to finally relax a little bit into his touch, enjoying the feeling of his fingers inside your hole. Then, in the next second, you felt some pressure on your clit as well, as he moved his thumb over it, slowly circling it, adding more to your pleasure.

You sucked in a breath at the feeling, having never felt pleasure like this before in your life. Feeling Zhongli smile against the skin of your neck, he pulled back a bit to pull you into a deep, passionate kiss.

Relaxing even more into his loving touch, he increased the stimulation he was putting on your clit, making you moan into the kiss.

Breaking the kiss, you tried to catch your breath again, suddenly feeling a third finger prodding at your entrance.

"That's it, my love. Just relax for me, it's gonna be alright.", Zhongli whispered against your ear, kissing the shell of it before wandering down to your neck again, sucking a mark there.

You tried your best to listen to him, but you couldn't help clamping up a bit at the intrusion. Zhongli, obviously noticing this, began slowly circling one of your nipples with his free hand, playing with your breast, while going down and licking the other with his tongue.

Thanks to the added, pleasurable feeling, you ease up more, making it easier for him to move his fingers inside of you. Now, his slow, steady pace started to pick up more and more, as he was now also stroking your clit in earnest.

He let out a deep moan against your skin, feeling you clamp down on his fingers. He couldn't help but imagine how it would feel if it was his cock instead..

He started moving faster and faster as your moans increased in volume, determined to make you come at least once before he would think about his own pleasure, even though his dick was aching for attention by now.

"Z-Zhongli.. I..I'm-", you got cut off by yet another one of your moans. Moving your hips against him, helping him in moving his long fingers inside of you. He was hitting just right every time he thrusted into you again and again, and his thumb moving on your clit just made this so much better.

Your hands gripped his hair, holding his face pressed against your breasts, not that he minded though. He was already in heaven, seeing you like this, knowing that he was making you feel this good, only made his chest swell with pride even more.

"Yes. You're doing so good for me, darling. Do it, come for me." His words were muffled against your skin, but you were still able to understand him just fine.

As if his words were the last straw you didn't know you needed, you were suddenly overrun with immense pleasure as your whole body began to tremble and twitch in his hold. You were clamping down on his fingers as the pleasure just seemed to get more and more.

Zhongli moaned against your skin, a deep sound vibrating through your body as he felt you release on his fingers. He continued moving his hand, prolonging your orgasm, helping you get the most out of it.

Once he felt you relax against the mattress, breathing heavily, he carefully pulled his fingers out of your pussy and climbed up so that he was now towering over you. He looked down at you, your expression undescribable to him, tears running down your cheeks but he knew they were caused by the pleasure.

He admired you for a few more moments before leaning down and capturing your lips into a kiss again. You were still a bit out of it, but you soon came back to your senses.

He was moving on top of you, his still clothed erection pressing against you, making you let out another moan at the feeling, confirming to you how much he was enjoying this himself.

Your hands moved from his shoulders down to the waistband of his pants, slowly pulling it down along with his underwear, leaving him completely naked as well now.

He broke off the kiss, looking down at you, seeing how you were eyeing him. He couldn't help the smirk that formed on his lips as he leaned down to give you a loving peck on your forehead.

"Don't worry, darling. I'll be careful. If ever you feel uncomfortable, don't hesitate to tell me, alright?"

You nodded, bracing yourself, knowing that it would most likely hurt. Zhongli noticed this, giving you a few other reassuring pecks on your face as he took a hold of his cock, giving it a few quick pumps, then lining himself up with your hole.

He looked into your eyes, making you look at him so that you would focus on him, then slowly started pushing into you.

You immediately squinted your eyes closed at the feeling. He was so much bigger than three of his fingers. It was uncomfortable and it hurt, but not enough that you wanted him to stop.

So, you took a deep breath, trying to force your body to relax and nodded, signaling for him to continue. However, he didn't move right away again. Instead, he reached down between your bodies, rubbing your clit, assisting you in making you relax again.

It helped, you started to loosen up more and he started to slide the rest of his cock inside you. Once he was finally all the way inside, you felt so full. You knew he was big, but you would have never thought that it would feel like this. Like your entire body was filled to the brim with just him..

A single tear escaped your eyes again, and Zhongli leanded down to capture it again, placing a soft kiss on the tip of your nose.

"Are you alright, my love?"

You nodded again, gradually getting used to the feeling of his cock inside your pussy, slowly getting turned into pleasure.

"Y-you can.. move.", you told him with a shaky voice, bracing yourself again.

He did as your requested, starting out slow and steady. He pulled out almost all the way, leaving only his tip inside of you, before thrusting in again in one quick, smooth motion.

Zhongli burried his face into the crook of your neck, panting loudly, but otherwise, no noises left him except for a groan here and there.

His thrusts gradually became faster at the feeling of your walls clamping down on him. It was even better than he had imagined before. You were obviously struggling with his size and somehow, that only excited him even more.

You hooked your legs behind him, your arms throwing themselves around his shoulders, holding him in this position. He wasn't able to move away from you anymore, not that he would ever want that in the first place.

He placed one hand into your hair, making you arch your neck so that he could mark you up there, while his other hand continued to rub circles into your clit.

Seeing as you were still sensitive from your previous orgasm, you were already close again.

"Ahh! Z-Zhongli! I'm- I'm close!", you tried telling him, hoping that he might slow down so you could enjoy this for a bit longer. However, he only increased the speed of his thrusts at this, rubbing your clit even harder than he had before.

"Mmm, me too, darling. I'm close too.", he spoke against your skin then continued to mark you up like it wasn't enough already.

You wanted to say something else, but in the next second, pleasure overtook you again as your second orgasm of the night washed over you. You cried out, moaning at the intensity of it all, your body trembling as the walls of your pussy clamped down on his cock over and over.

Zhongli let out a deep groan at the feeling, making a few more thrusts into your pussy before pulling out. He came all over your stomach, painting it in white.

You were both breathing heavily, exhausted. Zhongli fell down next to you on the mattress, pulling you close against his chest. He really wanted to get up and get a towel for you so he could clean you up.

But right now, he needed to feel close to you first, tell you how good you made him feel and how much he loved you, before he would take care of your every need. After all, he devoted himself to you, so he would take care of you, no matter what you needed of him...

[sonofatoasterwaffle]

Port in a Storm

“Hey, Buck, could you-“ Hen's hitting the top step when he hisses back “Shh!” 

She glances at Chimney for a sanity check, considering cuffing the back of Buck’s head for that, but he’s sitting on the couch, stock still, Eddie snoring gently against Buck’s shoulder. “Can’t move.” He explains.

Hen has to chuckle. “He’s not a cat, buck” 

She drops into the armchair closest to him, and he stops scrolling his phone with his free hand to look at her. “If I’m a golden retriever, Eddie is most definitely a cat.”

Chim nods like he can’t argue as he takes the seat across from them. “Hates attention except when he doesn’t, very protective over his young, great hair.” He counts off each thing as he says it. 

Hen supposes she doesn’t disagree. “He’s not sleeping at home right now, is he?” 

Buck sighs. “Based on the twitter links he’s been sending in the middle of the night, it seems like no.” 

Eddie, for his part, seems well and truly out. He’s sprawled low on the couch, boots bumping up against the coffee table, head lolled to the right against Buck and his arm slung over Buck’s leg, fingers curled under Buck’s knee like he’s afraid his human pillow might abandon him. “Has he been like this since I went to run flashcards?” 

“I literally can’t feel my arm.” Buck admits, but it doesn’t sound like he has any intention of moving. 

“You gotta feel for the guy.” Chim says, biting into a muffin from a batch someone left earlier this week. “Kid at home, dealing with grief, dealing with us.” 

Hen hums. At least he’s not alone, she thinks, catching the soft look in Buck’s eyes as he glances down at Eddie. She’s not sure if those two will ever realize what they have, but she supposes it doesn’t really matter as long as they don’t give it up. “So, you can’t help me move the medical supplies shipment.” 

“Performing a public service, here, Hen.” 

Chim snickers something about exactly what kind of servicing Buck would like to do for Eddie, but he’s resolutely ignored. Hen supposes Buck’s right. High-strung Eddie is annoying and sleep-deprived Eddie is pathetic and both at once makes her parenting instincts flare up like crazy, so it’s better for all of them if he gets a little rest. Even at the expense of Buck’s circulation. 

Eddie murmurs something in Spanish, nuzzles his nose into Buck’s neck and breathes deep. Buck’s as red as the ladder truck but he still doesn’t move, except to flip Chim off. “Leave him alone.” 

Chim throws up his hands, still grinning. “Easy, loverboy, I’m not coming for your man.” 

And Buck looks absolutely murderous but he’s powerless to stop Chimney from snapping a picture. He does leave the finger up for it. “I could easily throw you.” He threatens when his phone chimes with the inevitable group chat notification. 

“But Maddie would be so sad if you murdered me.” 

“Yeah, maybe you should think about that before doing murder-worthy shit.” 

Eddie stirs a little, and Buck relaxes back into the couch, free hand reaching over to thumb over Eddie's arm, and he immediately settles. “You guys are so gross I love it.” Chim crows, snapping another photo. 

“At some point, he’s gonna wake up, and then you’re gonna have to start running.” 

Hen goes back to her flashcards. Chim’s on his own with that one, she’s not taking the bullet for teasing she didn’t get to do. She gives Buck a sympathetic smile when he grouses “I’m never gonna hear the end of this, am I?” 

“Price you pay for being such a good best friend.” 

Buck rolls his eyes at her intoned best friend. “You’re on my list, too.” 

“Finally.” Bobby says in relief when he sweeps into the kitchen to start prep. "I was about to cut him loose if he didn't chill out." He points at Buck. “Don’t move.” 

“That’s what I said!” 

Also on ao3

[ari-the-meow]

thinkin bout my ocs being all cuddly and sweet and touchy without an ounce of romance behind their actions

Thinking about Anthony waking up in a cold sweat, another goddamn night terror. Running out of the room, careful not to wake Cici, but stopping when he remembers he can’t go outside anymore. He drops to the floor next to the couch, quiet sobs and hiccups threatening to escape his lips. Coming out in short, shallow, ragged breaths. He’s shaking at this point, until Quill steps out of their room, woken up by the floorboards creaking when Anthony stepped on them. He says nothing, just sits down next to Anthony, grabbing his hand and running his thumb across the back of it. Eventually, he does say something, a string of ‘its ok’s and ‘I’m here’s until Anthony’s breathing is calmer. He’s still crying quite a bit, but nowhere as bad as before. And as if on cue, Both Cici and Pricila step out of their respective sleeping areas. Cici almost sprints to grab Anthony. Hoisting him up gently and sitting both of them on the couch. Wrapping his arms around him, the pressure calming him slightly. Anthony still has an iron grip on Quill’s hand, not daring to let go. So he also moves up on the couch, still stroking the back of Anthony’s hand.

Pricila sits down next to them, laying her head right next to Anthony, and she starts humming. It was a soft tune, one that no one but her knew, they weren’t complaining though. Her usually sarcastic and snide voice, now soft and warm with emotion.

Anthony’s crying yet to cease, digging his nails into Cici’s back and Quill’s hand. Still humming, Pricila starts rubbing his back, using her long fingers to trace shapes in the soft flesh. Outlining each vertebrae with her finger nails.

Then Cassidy comes out, rubbing her eyes as her heart shattered at the sight before her. This isn’t the first time this has happened, sadly, but it still hurt to watch. She couldn’t even imagine how Anthony felt.

She sat down next to Cici’s legs, laying her head on his thigh. From where she was sitting there wasn’t really much she could do except be there for support. She still tried, reaching up and rubbing the part of Anthony’s leg she could reach from her current position.

As quiet the group thought they were being, it was evident they weren’t when Kira steps out. “What the he-“ She’s cut off by a strangled ‘oh’ when she sees the group on the couch. Her long legs stride to where Quill is sitting and picks them up gently, careful to not pull Anthony’s hand away. She sits down in Quills spot and lays him on her lap. She rests her head on Cici’s shoulder, and runs her hands through Anthony’s hair. She couldn’t feel anything but sympathy for her friend at that moment. She knew how those terrors felt, she had been the one in that exact position many times before.

Anthony wasn’t crying anymore, just breathing softly against Cici’s chest. Pricila kept humming the same tune over and over. Anthony could probably hum the entire song but memory now. Not that he was complaining. His eyes slowly started to close, fighting to stay awake. But the comfort of so many hands of people he loved more than anything and the sounds of their breathing, and humming, was almost too much to bear. It wasn’t his fault that he was so tired.

Anthony struggled to believe he was loved sometimes. Thinking he’s useless and failing to see that his friends loved him more than anything. But in moments like these, he realized he was loved. Oh he was so loved. He knew he was loved when they would read his poems and cry. Or when they would ask him for an opinion he thought he couldn’t give. Or in moments like these, where the idea of going to sleep is at the very back of their mind. The only thought behind their eyes being to comfort and to keep him safe. He was loved.

Tears pricked at his eyes, but for a different reason. He uttered a muffled ‘thank you’. No one replied, just held him tighter.

WOOO this was actually really nice to write !! I’ve had this idea for a while now and it only took around an hour to write. (Which may or may not be a good thing) but i reallyyyy enjoyed writing this and now I’ll probably write more drabbles !!

Anyway I’ll cry if this doesnt get seen by more than like 3 people