#pls dont worry about me im fine just venting

[acrobattack]

folks my home has been flooded

[notanotherblorbo]

I'm so glad I finally have a job where I get to actually interact with people. Except for part where I am constantly thinking think "be normal be normal these ppl are cool and nice pls be normal no don't say poggers in front of them be normal be normal don't verbally stim they will hear you be normal be normal be normal be normal act normal do not bring up your hyperfixations they will think you are crazy be normal be normal brain pls shut up be normal memorise how to do this pls brain pls act normal act normal" because I'm not comfortable with or firmialiar with any of them yet.

[wtfuglydevil]

gkkuguu my bf made a tumblr just to be on here with me and that is so so sweet but he has to stay far away from my vent blog pls i do not want you to worry about me sweet handsome man i promise i am fine IM FINE IM FINE DONT LOOK AT THE SIDE BLOG BABE I PROMISE IM FINE-

[chososcamgirl]

OCCASIONAL RANT ‼️‼️

Hey sigma😈😈 I needed to rant but this didn’t really fit in the daily check in (which I will be uploading soon) so I decided to start these random occasional rants 🤗🤗

WARNING ⚠️ I YAPPED HARD + I WAS A NEGATIVE NANCY IN THIS ONE.. KIND OF A VENT(?) SO IF U DONT FW THAT SKIP THIS AND ILL TAKE THAT AS A SIGN TO STOP YAPPING ABOUT HOW EMO I AM 🔥😈

I WENT TO A GAME TODAY AND U GOT INTO SOME BEEF WITH MY 4LIFER AND OMFG I WAS SOBBING 😭 I TRIED TO HARD TO KEEP IT IN BUT I STARTED FUCKING CRYING IN THE MIDDLE OF A GAME THATS SO NOT SIGMA 😔💔🔥

AND THE PERSON I RANTED ABOUT IN MY LAST CHECK IN (not the girl that carfished as me) SHE TALKED SHIT ABOUT ME N SNITCHED ALL THE STUFF I SAID WITH HER WHEN WE WERE FRIENDS BECAUSE SHE THOUGHT I WAS GIVING HER BAD VIBES.. THE WHOLE DAY WAS A BLUR I DONT RLY REMEMBER WHAT LED TO THIS BEEF BUT NOW WERE TAKING A BREAK ‼️‼️

My friend saw me crying and drove me to the mall for retail therapy… and she payed for me cus I was sobbing the entire time… 💔💔 I FUCKING LOVE HER WNRNENEN SHES SO SWEETTTR… we left the game early just to go to the mall bc she wanted me to feel better 🙁🙁 I’m FUCKING SOBBING THATS LEGIT SO SWEET and she got me a figure im THROWING UP UBEBENENENEKENE 😞🙁💗

I have another social event tmrw idk if i can do it anymore gang.. I’ve been PACKED this entire weekend and my social battery is DRAINEDD + I have a reunion with this old friend tmrw and we’ve been planning it for a while so id feel bad canceling but GOD am I tired.. was already drained from all the social interactions and classes I had and meeting this friend is gonna feel like such a chore 😔😔💔 anrenne i wish I had a high social battery 😢

I think i fucked up the rest of my school year which kind of scares me but we ball ig 💔💔😞 and I kindddd of told ppl my secrets and things I wasn’t supposed to say (about me) so…. 😢😢 someone NEEDS TO STOP ME FROM YAPPING / OVERSHARING

OKOK SORT FOR RANTING POO POO.. DIALY CHRCK IN COMINF SOON‼️‼️ STAY TUNED VRO ILY 😍😍

- 🐺

HII ALPHA!!!! 🐺🐺

RESPONSE UNDER CUT!

i am more than willing to read your rants/vents🙂‍↕️ IF YOU EVER NEED TO MY ASKS R OPEN!! <33

omg no not ur 4lifer that’s horrible :(( i hope u guys made up and she apologised ☹️ being in a fight with ur bff SUCKS and don’t worry crying it totally sigma #NOJUDGEMENT

okay FUCK that friend because why would she say that after you ranted to her HELLO?? she’s an OPP bro don’t engage with her she sounds like a hater😒 but i’m sorry that u had a bad day angel :(( hopefully this week is better for you <3

okay the other friend is an actual SWEETHEART!!! i love her i just know she has a kind soul. i’m so glad she did that for you she’s actually an angel. also don’t feel pressured to go to any more social events if you’re drained because it’ll just end up with you feeling shitty and a waste of time </3 don’t worry about it! i don’t think you have! i think it was just a misunderstanding. it’ll blow over in a week trust me, all school things do it’s not the end of the world. also the secret thing 😭 if u feel like u can trust them definitely yes but girl don’t go telling just anyone!! i say this with genuine concern because it CAN bite you in the back if they decide to use it against you.. but you should be fine🙂‍↕️ i have faith in you!!! DONT APOLOGISE!! ILY VRO‼️‼️😈🫵 i’m missing ur asks this was the last ask i have got from you.. pls tell me ur okay…

[b0mblover]

.

By: J

major tw; minor ed/ weight loss mention,

the absolute biggest tw for suicide, really just probably dont read this at all if youre suicidal, or prone to it, or uh really just not good in the slighest,

i uh, talk about in detail ways i could kill myself, really, i don’t recommend reading this unless like, you need a refrence on how highly suicidal people speak 💀

ah but srsly, probably dont read this for your own sake, im basically venting on alt, but like, not poetically in the slighest, theres only so many ways a guy can rephrase wanting to kill himself without being direct kay?

uh, probably dont worry abt this, i uh, even if i /did/ try to kms id probably survive, dont put that much faith into me

ok nvm irl i just spilled my goddamn penrice im gonna actually kms this is my breaking point (hard joke)

ugvfnd god im so sorry for writi g this and postint it, i cant do the whole keeping my feelings to myself anymore, its awful.

CHOEKS imagine this is jiro nitos suicide note or smth and critize it I DONT KNOW 😭 please laugh, im trying to hard to deflect from how awful i feel.

i urge to you turn back and not read this.

-from this point on, i am not responsible for how anyone interprets this/does because of this, you have been warned, this is the writer venting and being highly suicidal, no one is forcing you to read this. if you cannot deal with this, then dont read it, im not responsable for how others react to my writing, for your own sake. again, you have been warned-

i apologize for writing this.

words are escaping me at the moment.

ill probably be fine.

im human in the end.

something we all can agree on.

every sign points to it.

it is in the end correct.

but now,

i question if im even enough to deserve the title.

my anger is consuming me over nothing.

at the same time.

i feel so numb.

my throat feels tight.

like im going to cry.

my vision is blurry.

and yet.

as always.

i cant.

i wont.

im tired of the “sympathy” 

someone like me doesnt deserve it

i dont deserve it.

i dragged myself into this hell.

and im not getting myself out.

i said that the next time i fucked up i would kill myself.

here we are.

still- annoyingly- alive.

i dont know if ill try.

i dont feel.

scared.

to try.

pills, a noose, drowning, gunshot, razor blades, 

i know about every way to kill myself

i have about every way to kill myself

and yet

im still here.

alive.

my noose, sits beside my on the door, id have to move my chair, get a stool,

the last time i tried it didnt break,

and ive lost around 10 pounds, i know it wouldnt break, i know it would work, but as last time, it took too long, i got bored, ‘came to my senses’

the pills on the table, i know of at least three medications in them that would kill me, not to mention the combinations, but, i cant normally swallow pills well, i usually end up gagging, plus, getting your stomach pumped is really costy,

the water would be, rather easy i believe, ive only tried it once, but, after she tried to do that, i dont know if i could even force myself underwater, even to kill myself,

the gun that resides on that same table, it works, i have two bullets that fit it, no more, no less, i know it still works perfectly, granted being older than me, it probably would be my best chance, but, i - well, i cant say i remember the parts to shoot that are vital, thatll finish the job, and i really rather not waste my bullets and money on surviving,

the razor blades on my desk, everywhere, the black letters on the box reading “do it” only feels more like a calling, but, even when i try to cut deeper, i almost never can unless on accident, no matter how hard i seem to press- no matter how quickly i do it, i can never seem to get past the first layer of skin, 

i, really- really dont know what to do,

i said id attempt, i fucked up, im tired of people seeing this awful side of me, but when thats almost all you have left of what you can barely even call ‘you’. 

the only way i see my life going.

is ending.

weather the original plan,

suicide,

an accident,

i know in the end im destined to kill or get myself killed.

i truly don’t believe that ill die of anythint “natural” unless you consider jumping off a roof natural.

in a way, i want to listen to what she says,

to give up on art, become a scientist.

i know its not even possible,

its just my own sense of punishing myself, because the mental pain of knowing that i shouldve died years ago stings so much more than my arms ever will, hurting myself, barely hurts, and i know that the only person that it would hurt from- wont. 

even if i were to beg, plead, i know they wont.

its almost june.

i 

i dont really think i want to live to then,

im 

im scared that last year will repeat itself,

i dont know if its rightful,

but i want to get out of their life,

i dont want them to suffer like they did,

i dont want anyone to suffer besides myself.

and.

i believe that taking care of me.

is suffering.

therefore.

the only thing i feel i can do.

is leave.

i dont want to leave.

i want to stay with them.

but.

im horrified that ill fuck up again.

and no one needs to deal with that.

besides.

people get bored of others.

move on.

i seem to always be the only one who cant.

i know how illogical i sound.

i know that.

but to me it makes perfect sense.

its clear.

im so sorry.

[mochiffon]

i'm having a "mental breakdown" so if any of my mutuals right now are concerned/confused about any irrational behavior of mine, now you don't have to worry :>

[asshole--official]

skip down of you don't want to see the art spam.

hey ik I havent posted art in a while. idk if it's bc of my mood lately but I havent been up to drawing that much lately. I take more ap classes that I have to put a lot more effort into focusing on so I can't draw that much during school. uhhh then after I'm too tired and stressed to sit down and draw. plus I've felt hella guilty about things. my thots are everywhere man.

this wasn't supposed to be so personal?? I've just had a hard time drawing lately and wanted y'all to know about it. I'm not dead lol. just feel like it nowadays.

...! read this tho!!! I'm going to be posting a bunch of sketches I made during the summer. none of them r aphmau related except one innerdemons thing of ava and laurali (???) that's not even that good. I like the others tho & I'll give a little desc of them cuz I like

most of them r my own ocs, another is a cat study (since I can't draw animals), oh wait nvm there's a shdks one (if you squint). you can't tell since nobody's really seen me draw the shadow knights. oh fuvk I literally just made

ANYWAY, I'm posting them on my art specific blog and then I'll repost them tomorrow morning. you can ask for my art blog ig you want to but I post just as much as I do on here.

if u don't want to see them, I'm tagging it as lowkey vent.

(probs gonna delete later)

[nanaminsonyfans]

Comfort Headcanons

masterlist

a/n; not requested but i need this rn. its more of a vent piece rather than anything else. as for the second half, those are personally all my thoughts and worries with my scars. like a i, a vent piece.

warning; mention of periods, s*lf harm, scars, and poor body image.

Being on your period with him

Mark

Mark came home late as usual to see you clutching his sweater he wore everyday. You were curled up in the fetal position and groaning. You looked almost dead. He got worried immediately.

"Y/n, baby." He whispers softly, wrapping his arms around you, not even bothering to take his super-suit off. You smiles a little at the comfort and warmth of him against your back and waist.

"Yes?" "What's wrong?" "Cramps...." You mumble, almost embarrassed. What if he didnt want to be around you. Even though you've been dating forever, and you usually stay at his place, that fear was always in the back of your head.

"Period?" You just nod, chewing the inside of your cheek. "What are you craving?" He was so sweet, even if you weren't craving anything and told him so, he would still get you something.

"The frozen yogurt from that place in Australia." You mumble and he gets up. "I'll be right back with that, then I'll change and cuddle. Deal?" You smile at him, he loves your smile so much.

"Deal."

Rex

Rex had been cuddling you back at the Guardian headquarters. He knew of your monthly, tracked it even. He may be a douche but he cares for his s/o.

So here he was, holding the heating pad against your waist, rubbing the balls of your hips softly. His hands were rough from being a hero but, sometimes it was nice.

The way you were secure in his arms made you feel safer than ever. You're blinks got more slow as you tried to watch the movie with your boyfriend. He chuckled softly, your back vibrating being of his laugh.

"Baby, just sleep...you'll feel better if you do." "But....'anna....'end time 'ith yous..." You slur, half awake. "You are babe. Now sleep...." Rex kisses your head softly, earning a hum from you.

"g'night...."

He sees your SH scars for the first time

Mark

You two had been dating for awhile. Not long enough to have sex just yet but, long enough to have heavy make outs. But currently you weren't doing that.

It was Mark's birthday and you took him to your family's lake house. William, Eve, and Amber came too. It was easier to convince your parents that way.

You stared at your reflection in the mirror.

The swimsuit was cute, it suited any body type, but it showed a little too much...of your hips for your liking. You shook your head.

You did everything to try and get rid of the scars. Coconut oil? didnt work. Foundation? Also didnt, pls you were going swimming. Bandages? too obvious-

You were snapped out of your thoughts when there was a knock on the door.

"Hey, Y/n, you gonna come out yet?" "In-In a second!" You panicked. Fuck! You cant go out. it went from your hip to a little bit of your thigh. He was gonna fucking notice-

"Are you okay? I'm coming in-" "No dont-!"

He came in. At first he was awestruck by you. You looked amazing in that! His eyes wondered and he saw.

Yeah you had a few scars on your arms, but those healed, they werent as discolored as the ones on your hips. Didn't help that you would basically relapse every other week.

"Y/n-" "I-I know...you probably think I'm ugly an-and an attention whore and you dont want to be with me anymore. That's fine- i wouldn't want me either-"

His soft fingers trailed across the scars. Mark placed a small kiss on your forehead, a small yet sympathetic smile.

"I love you. Nothing will change that. Okay?" He says with those amazing eyes. Eyes that were telling the truth.

"Okay."

Rex

This man was handsy. So if you relapsed, the next day he knew, or he knew something was up. You opened up about it once, but he said he didnt care, as long as you were okay.

You weren't okay.

After a relapse, the next day you would cuddle Rex, his hands would go to your hips and you would flinch, then wince. It stung.

You never bothered to clean it because, you deserved this. Everything bad happening to you was of your doing.

You knew you were a horrible person. You didnt know why the fuck Rex would he with someone LIKE you. What the fuck made you special? You don't deserve any of this love or happiness.

And thats why you relapse. Because you dony deserve it. You dont deserve Rex, your friends, or being a superhero.

Right now, you were cuddling Rex. You had shorts on that were riding up a tad, showing more of your thigh. You didn't notice that your scars and discoloration from said scars were visible, until Rex's thumb grazed eyes over it.

"Y/n...you said you stopped..." You thought he was disappointed in you. Who wouldn't be? Plus you fucking lied to him. But no, it was just concern.

"I-I know and im sorry." You whisper and grab his hand, pulling it away. "You probably dont want me now. I'm ugly. I'll never be as attractive as Eve or Mark or Kate or-or..."

You cried as you stumbled over your words, cursing at yourself.

"Stop it." Rex looked stern. "I love you. You could be a turtle for all i care and id still love you. Even if that is beastiality." "Turtles can speak-" "Yeah but...." You let out a small giggle.

"Whatever." Rex grumbled with a slight smile. "But, no matter what, i will love you. Forever. Okay?" You nod, hugging him. "Just....come to me next time?"

"I'll try." "That's all i ask for..."

[dilfwaynes]

hi!! can i request a hc of the batfam reaction of their eastasian!reader gf  experiencing racism? thank you <33

just a reminder if you took place in any involvement of asian hate block me rn bitch :)

a/n: i hope you enjoyed this anon, i tried to make it accurate without stepping over any boundaries since im not asian myself. if anyone finds any sort of this offensive pls dm me !!

warning ; racism, batfam beating hoes, mention of blood

parings : bruce wayne x asian!reader, jason tood x asian!reader, dick grayson x asian!reader, stephanie brown x asian!reader, tim drake x asian!reader, damian wayne x asian!reader

BRUCE WAYNE:

it’ll honestly take a minute for bruce to realize what happened

when first entering the store he took notice of the man glaring but brushed it off thinking it was directed towards him as bruce wayne

you however didnt really pay attention to the dirty looks being thrown at you

with bruce excusing himself to the restroom and makes a promise of a quick return, you wander around the area by yourself

it was all fine until a man approaches you, giving a fast glance at him before turning away. there was definitely something up with him

“you don’t belong here”

your head shot up at his words, looking around you to make sure he was talking to you

“excuse me?” you lift an eyebrow at him, knowing what he was hinting at

“you fucking heard me, you don’t belong here. go back to your country.”

you inch away as he steps closer,”you better back the fuck away..”

he simply gives a smug face only coming closer,”or what?” you tighten your jaw when he loosely lets out a slur, your fists clenched.

“or i dislocate your arm.”bruce’s voice rings out, deep in anger as his eyes flicker to you and scanning to see if you were ok physically.

the ugly bitch’s face pales when he realizes who’s your boyfriend. without hesitation bruce yanks him away from you, slamming him to the wall

demanding for a first and last name,  squeezing his neck when the guy stays quiet

shaking he gives in and tells, flinching when bruce slams him against the wall one last time before dropping him

“i guaranteed whatever poor status you do contain i’ll tear it completely, say goodbye to your job.” he grabs for your hand and brings you into him as you both walk away.

“i’m sorry i shouldn’t have left you alone, my fault,”he presses a kiss to your temple.”and please don’t think any worth of that garbage’s words.”

you shake your head,”he was just some lowlife, not worth thinking about.” you reply leaning into him.

he looked at you and could tell no matter what those words still hurt somewhat and it angered him to no end

no one deserved to hear that disgusting shit, especially not his girlfriend.

his eyes hardens but doesn’t push further to make you anymore uncomfortable than you probably already are

giving another kiss to the side of your head he makes a quiet promise to himself not to leave you alone anymore in public with disgusting people like that around

jason todd:

as soon as the slur leaves the guy’s lips jason’s fist collides to his jaw, no doubt   shattering it

you and jason were grabbing lunch at some restaurant slash bar since it was the first time in a few days jason was free

everything was okay until you got up to go to the bathroom and some guy bumped into you

jason watched with hardening eyes as you apologize instead of the guy who slammed into you

“watch where the fuck you’re going at.”

you fall shock at the word, staying in place

while jason is on his feet in no time, swinging to the asshole’s face

screams were heard as well as the sound of bones breaking from his fist impact, the guy stumbling to the floor

“you racist fucking prick that’s my girlfriend you ugly fuck,”lifting him by his shirt he grabs his face and turns him to you.”apologize to her before i break your fucking face.”

he quickly rambles apologizes, crying in fear or pain. most likely a mix of both

jaaon lets him go and gives him another punch, this time to the nose. finding satisfaction at the pool of blood now seeping out

jason grabs your hand and starts to lead you outside,”let’s go eat somewhere else and forget about this shithole.”

you barely had time to give a reaction to anything as everything happened so fast

“hey look at me, don’t listen to that worthless fuck and his fucked up mindset. i dont know what to say to comfort you since i never experienced anything like this.” he stops at the car, placing his hands onto your shoulders

you nod sighing lightly, you only wanted a simple lunch with your boyfriend but instead got hate crime for simply  breathing.

“it’s nothing i haven’t gone through before,”he shakes his head blue eyes filling up with rage.

“no one’s gonna be doing that anymore, or at least getting away with it while i’m around

DICK GRAYSON:

he was completely taken by surmise at the slur being thrown at you, as well as the fault of you being the root of the covid 19

but before he had any time to react you were already on your feet glaring,”the fuck you just called me you piece shit.”

before he could reply you already kneed him and punched him between the eyes, dick laughing at the cries of pain

“you want me to take over or you wanna handle it babe?”

even how badly he wanted to beat the shit out of the pos the choice was yours

you denied and wanted to handle this on your own

but everytime the guy tried to get up dick would just shake his head and tell him to stay down, or simply push him back down

eventually if you start going too far richards would pull you away and tell you hes not worth it

he understands your anger but he doesn’t want you to past a line you won’t recover from bc of some worthless grime

“c’mon, he’s not worth anymore of our time. lets go eat pizza.”

DAMIAN WAYNE:

swing first talk later

he’ll just look at guy for a few seconds with a blank face

then he’s literally knocking them out

will probably kick him into the wall or ground

u dont know if you wanna pull him away because you already the tabloids, or if you wanna let him continue to beating the guy

damian probably wouldn’t realize how much he beat the guy to a pulp until you’re tugging him away

nudging his neck with to your nose to try and calm him down

he’ll end the fight with spitting on him tbh

your face reddens with anger when your eyes met the racist bitch, enjoying the view of his blood on the floor

“racist piece of shit,” he hisses before finally turning his back brow still frowning with anger

unlike the others (mentioned) he also knows and experienced racism and understands your point view way more

and know bow to comfort you better tbh

afterwards he’ll talk to you and comfort you, as well as opening up about his racist encounters, as well as his mothers.

if you’re still upset about what happened some hours later he 100% offers to beat up the guy again

you laugh it off cos hes serious about doing detective work, finding the guy and beating him to a pulp

you thank him but deny his offer and settle to confiding into him and just telling him how your feelings

STEPHANIE BROWN:

“are you fucking serious right now bitch?”

steph deadpans staring at the girl who called you the slur with ease, going on about how you were the cause of corona and to go back to your country

shocked at the words, hearing all of this before but it still doesn’t fail everytime you hear them

turning to you and seeing the hurt on your face from the word, she quickly turns to seeing red

without a second thought she grabs the collar of the woman’s shirt

“you’re gonna fucking apologize to my girlfriend right now or i’m gonna slam your face into the floor and break it

you stay still, pleased at watching the girl shake in fear under steph as she chokes out a mesh of a shit rushed apologizes

stephanie throws her down to the ground after her third apologize

“are you okay?” she knew you weren’t but asking the question would lead into the stage of comforting you

you nod but go on to tell her that this isn’t the first or last time this will happen, but it still never fails to shock you

she frowns at your experiences and doesn’t quite know what to do to help since she never went thru anything like that

she offers to take you to your favorite restaurant and end the day in wayne manor watching whatever you wanted

smiling when you accept, pulling you in her and pressing a kiss on-top of your head

“dont worry i’ll beat any jackass that pulls any racist shit.”

TIM DRAKE:

i think he’ll be the less  violent one out of everyone

he would honestly be so disgusted and gross out at humanity and how the woman thinks shes superior just because she’s white

if it was a guy saying what was said, then he would probably hit them ngl

but he takes the higher road with the woman, belittling and ending her with his vocabulary

and you’re pretty sure that his words hurt her more than an actual punch would 

you laugh when he compares her built to a buffalo

he then goes on to a more education lean, explaining how skin tone has nothing to do with a person, and she should adapt to modern times and stop being a racist cunt

after he ends it he goes on to find out who she is and email/call her workplace to inform what kind of employee they have

probably also goes on to make sure she wont be hired anywhere else

comforts you alot and and will get you anything you want

prob gets you both milkshakes as you vent to him about today and other racist things said to you

hates how you have to go thru any of this for simply existing

the  incident opens his eyes and he starts talking to bruce about opening a charity for ‘stop asian hate’

would shy away from the press and say you both came up with the fund

u’ll dismiss that rq and tell everyone it was all tim’s idea

all the money goes people got assaulted and paying for any hospital bills or anything needed

[sunatooru]

um could I get an emergency request ? s/o having sleeping problems + depression and forgetting to take care of them self? im having problems sleeping rn and I keep playing games and I keep forgetting to drink water :/

could the characters be kenma and other ppl u like idk ... I'm kinda feeling empty and have no meaning but I'm not going to vent bc u dont need that , pls take care ♡ drink some water and take rests ♡ if ur wondering abt me I'm fine I'm getting a bit better ..

Hi lovely! I hope you take your own advice too <3 especially as it gets warmer. Feel free to always request again ☺️ I added Akaashi as well as Kenma. I hope this helps xx

~

Warnings: mentions of sleeping problems and not taking care of self

~

Kenma

* He knows a little about how you’re feeling

* If it wasn’t for kuroo, he wouldn’t know what to do

* He catches you playing at his set up, a yawn escaping your mouth but you continue to play

* He tiptoes towards you, his soft hands softly placed over yours

* “Babe, why are you still awake?” He stands in front of you and takes the controller

* When you tell him about your difficulties, he nods

* Rubbing your cheeks and holding your hand in his

* “I know it’s hard. But you’re not alone. I know I have my own sleeping issues…but we’ll work on them, together. Can you join me in bed please? Even if you can’t sleep, we can talk.” He proposes

* He gives you a tired smile, leading you to bed before leaving end coming back with a glass of water

* “Here…” he nods, sliding next to you and hugging your torso

* “You mean everything to me. I’m so glad you’re with me. You’re wonderful and I can’t imagine life without you. Whenever you can’t sleep, tell me. We can play together or just be like this.” He draws hearts on your stomach, relaxing when you thread your hands through his hair

* “I love you. I’ll take care of you even when you feel like giving up.”

* He brings you water whenever he can, kissing you cheeks and playing with you until you start getting tired

* If you’re still awake, he kisses you tenderly, keeping you in his arms and whispering his favourite things about you

* Seeing you smiling and being yourself motivated him to be better for you, because you deserve everything

Akaashi

* His love language is acts of service, so he’s always ready to take care of you

* When he realises you’ve been staying up more recently and not taking care of yourself, he steps in

* “Love, what’s wrong?” He holds your hand and caresses the skin with his thumb

* He listens carefully, eyes softening at your frustration

* “Don’t worry, I’m here. We’ll get through your sleeping troubles. We’ll figure out why this is happening and make sure you’re drinking enough water to.” He picks your hand up and kisses your knuckles

* He smiles at you and pulls you in for a kiss

* During the day he’ll bring you water, he’ll also cut up some fruits so you get water and other nutrients at the same time

* When you can’t fall asleep, he doesn’t force you to get into bed

* He’ll watch you play your game as he gets other things done

* He won’t let you stay awake by yourself but if it gets too late, he’ll pay your head and smoothly call you into bed

* “I know you’ve got a lot on your mind…some things are hard and that’s okay. But it’ll get better. You’ll start sleeping better and won’t be hiding that beautiful smile. It doesn’t matter how long it takes, my love. You’re not going through it alone, I’ll always be here.” He looks into yours eyes, hand on your jaw and giving you a peck

* It’s doesn’t matter how long it takes, he’s patient and he’ll do anything to make you feel like you again

[drunkleech]

Your answer was perfect don’t worry Valiumgirl but I feel like this is something I like to pretend doesn’t exist because I’ll never do anything about it but if you ever wanna vent about to with me you always can ms “the soundtrack” ily tale care of your cute pls Ik nic said he would be seriously pls

JAHSHWHDHHAHDA sorry its so sweet the way you always find new names to call me. MS THW SOUNDTRACK. so good. i feel the same; its a creeping thought but i never do a lot about it. the max i do is trying to dress in a masculine way sometimes ig. but im a girl et cetera. well who cares just be yourself. none of this matters. that's why i settled with myself; i can be myself however i want and that doesn't mean anythiing. dress how you like act how you like whatever makes you happy. that's the goal. and be kind ofc but that's something u already do :3 im ok i dont need to vent... i understand you in that part, too. but if you ever wanna say anything i can try, im awful at that tho sorry ;-;

and i also love you. my cuts aren't deep enough for an infection don't worrryyyy im fine ^^ I LOVE both of you so much you're always so sweet to me.....

[lucky-peoqle]

dating steve and being dustin's sister would include...

OKAY HI THIS IS MY FIRST ONE OF THESE EVER SO IF YOU LIKED IT AND WANT MORE PLS TELL ME

season 1

you and steve aren't dating yet, y'all are kinda enimes in a way

you being friends with the party

og babysitter for them

besties with jonathan

helping to boys find will the night they find eleven

you go over to the wheelers to make sure mike gets to he's safe

you see steve trying to sneak into nancy's room

you roll your eyes

he waves and acts like he's doing nothing

you go back to the two boys with mike

people think you and jon are dating

when steve has jon's camera you run up to them telling him to knock it off

"knock it off steve, give it back."

"or what, henderson? or what?"

when he drops jon's camera you slap him across the face.

he lowkey fell in love with you a bit

you tell the party you slapped steve across the face and they treat you like a queen

walking into the allyway with jon and nance when 'nancy the slut wheeler' was written on the movie theater

"oh look, it's nancy the slut wheeler and the creepy couple."

you get all up in his face

"what. the. fuck. harrington."

you try to punch him but jon and nancy pull you back.

cheering jonathan on when him and steve fight

the night the demogorgan attack you go with jon and nance to the byers.

opening the door when steve comes over

"hey y/n, is uh, is nancy here?"

"steve, go home it's not safe."

him walking in anyway.

when the demogorgan attacks you almost get eaten but steve wacks the damn thing before it can

"thanks harrington."

"no problem henderson."

when you find out will had been found you cry. hard.

when you meet up with dustin and the party again you hug them all so tight, but dustin tighter

before steve leaves the hospital you stop him

"uh, thanks for saving my ass back there at the byers."

"yeah, don't worry about it."

y'all smile at each other

then he leaves

season 2

you and steve haven't talked since that night

but you do share glances

the first time he talked to you that year was:

billy's arms around your waist

you're uncomfortable telling him to stop

he asks you to tina's party

you say no

you asks you on a date

"hey asshole! she said leave her alone."

steve.

"whatever." billy shakes his head and leaves

"thanks harrington."

"yeah, don't wention it."

walks away lol awkward.

going as a female ghostbuster with the party!!

max instantly loves you tbh

you leave a bit early then the rest of the group

when dustin gets home he bursts into you room

"what the fuck dusty?"

"shut up i found a world changing discovery!"

shows you dart.

"wHAT THE FUCK IS THAT"

"SHHHH mom with hear you!"

"what's going on in there?"

"nothing mom!!"

when dart eats mews you cry

"it ate my cat?"

"please dont cry..."

going to the wheelers with dustin and see steve.

"hey harrington, what are you doing?"

"uh, going to apologize to nancy."

"she's not here."

"oh."

"STEVE DO YOU STILL HAVE THAT BAT?"

explains the plan to him

going back to your house in steve car.

you can see in the corner of your eye he keeps glancing at you.

when y'all are in the basement/cellar you see dart and scream when he runs at you

steve bashes his bat at it and runs over to you

"hey, are you okay?"

you laugh, "this is like the 3rd time you've saved me."

"yeah, yeah whatever. im a superhero i get it."

"shut up harrington."

"steve stop flirting with my sister."

you two went red oops

listening to steve's stupid advice on girls to dustin.

"don't listen to him dusty, his advice sucks ass."

"it doesn't!"

"if it doesn't then where is nancy right now huh? she's off somewhere with jon."

"can you shut it, no one asked you to butt into our conversation."

"yeah whatever harrington."

going to the junkyard with max, lucas and the two idiots.

max and you basically doing all the work

dusin and lucas are talking while steve is doing some of the work but he's also staring at you most of the time.

"steve please do something."

"yeah, uh, sorry."

you and steve going out to fight the demodogs.

"shit shit shit shit shit."

"sTEVE BEHIND YOU"

"HENDERSON LOOK OUT"

chaotic energy pls

going back onto the bus

"you called me steve."

"fuck off steve."

"say it again."

he loves the way you say his name awe

"steve."

he almost has a heart attack

"stop. flirting. with. my. sister."

"sorry."

going back to the byers and talking to steve.

when eleven comes back you hug her so tight

"who's that?"

steve whispered in you're ear.

it sent shivers down your spine i-

when billy comes into the house he corners you.

"hey princess, you didn't come to that date last week."

"i was busy."

"i doubt that."

"hey jackass, what did i tell you about leaving my girlfriend alone?"

steve punches billy.

you went super red omg.

"steve just called you his girlfriend.."

dustin grinning super wide.

"shut it dusty."

when max was driving you and mike were in the back with steve.

steve's head on your lap.

"dustin...?"

"no steve it's y/n."

calming him down when he freaks out about the car.

when y'all get to the weird hole thing you talk steve into going down with them.

"come on steve, we have to protect the kids."

"alright, fine."

you smile at him and he falls in love with you even more.

the kids thank you for talking him into it.

when y'all are in the hole and y'all run into dart.

"it's dart. dusty do something."

"yeah i got this."

when they escape and the demodogs come charging you and steve stand in fear.

"this is it, im going to die here."

steve grabs you hand.

the demodogs run past you and to the meat.

steve wraps you in the tightest hug and you're crying.

he kisses you on the top of your head.

getting out of the hole and talking tl him about billy

"steve you called me your girlfriend."

"yeah sorry, i just didn't want to see you get hurt."

"awe, you care about me harrington?"

"of course i do, idiot."

the night of the snowball you see dustin in the hallway walking to the front door.

"steve's here."

you and steve have gotten very close the past month.

"okay, i wanted to tell you you look good before you left."

"and did steve tell you his hair secrets?"

"maybe.." dustin chuckles.

its been about 30 minutes since steve took dustin and you hear a knock at the door.

you open it and see steve.

"hey y/n."

"hi steve."

"i was wondering if you wanted to hang out?"

"sure."

that night consisted of watching christmas movies and cuddling after a bit.

steve pauses the movie.

"what are you doing?"

"uh.. y/n i need to tell you something."

"oh okay.." you heart is pounding.

"you know what, fuck it."

you open your mouth to say something but before you can steve is kissing you.

it's soft and full of care and love.

you pull away needing air.

"i've loved you since you slapped him for breaking jonathan's camera."

you chuckle.

"i love you too steve, since you kinda saved my ass from the demogorgan."

falling asleep on the couch in each others arms.

dustin comes home and see you two and smiles.

"sTEVE WAKE UP"

both of you wake up.

"you forgot to pick me up."

season 3

you two are dating now yay!!

mom and dad of the party.

making fun of steve in his scoops ahoy uniform.

he rolls his eyes.

"you know you love it."

"yeah, you do look hot."

he loves to kiss you omg.

"steve don't kiss my sister in front of me."

does it anyway.

"what the fuck dude."

one night during the first nights of summer you and steve where having a prettt steamy make out session in your room.

his shirt was off and so was yours ;))

dustin walked in

" hey y/n csn i borrow- OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK."

you yell at him

"DUSTIN OUT NOW"

he zooms outta there.

back to making out lol

you are a year younger then steve so you're going into senior year.

steve reassuring you it's easy but ur not sure.

this boy loves to spoil you with ice cream.

when his parents aren't homd you come over and late night swim and cuddle on the roof looking at stars a lot.

he's so cheesy omg

when dustin comes back you giggle at there silly handshake.

"and hi babe."

kiss

"stEVE NO KISSING IN FRONT OF ME"

"let me love my girlfriend pls."

when you find out about suzie you get all protective.

"are you sure she's right for you?"

"i swear she is omf."

you and jon have been so busy you kinda stop hanging out but like you're too busy with the kids anyway.

best friends with robin omg.

when dustin and steve say that russian spies are in hawkins you laugh

then you hear the recording and you believe them oop

part of the scoops troop!!

when you get trapped in the elavator you cry.

"please don't cry babe, we're gonna be okay."

steve hugs u tight.

getting separated from steve and robin and you cry again.

"if he gets hurt i swear to god ill blow this place up."

"jesus calm down henderson."

you smile at dustin and wipe your tears.

after you got out of the vents for what felt like hours you find what looks to be a giant red block you can ride in.

"hell yeah!"

"dustin there's no key."

"shiiit."

finding a key and sitting in the back of the car thing with the deadly weapon.

"okay ready?"

"yep."

running and zapping the commies with the thing and erica is too.

after getting into the room you run up to steve and gasp.

"hi baby."

"oh hey y/n..." steve slurs.

you look at his swollen shut eye.

"jesus you're beat."

dustin getting them out and you help steve out of them room while erica and dustin help robin.

sitting in the back with robin and steve.

steve keeps putting his hand on your thigh and you hit it off.

"steve, i love you bur stop."

he stops.

getting back into the elavator and sigh at robin and steve.

steve falls of the cart and you kneel down next to him.

"he's drugged." dustin says.

"no im not dad."

you laugh.

going into the movie theaters and loosing the two idiots was no treat.

PT 2 IS OUT

[noyasboxdye]

hello bby ily /p

you dont have to answer this or you can answer this privately if you want because ik its personal and lmk if im overstepping a boundary i'll back off w no hard feelings <3 timid abt sending this bc i know its personal dont be afraid to tell me to back off. + i'm sorry if this is jumping to conclusions, i just thought i'd say smth to let you know in case this IS the case.

but i did notice that in alex's blog you said smth about your chicken nuggets and counting the cals and i want you to know that i luv you.

as someone who struggles w anorexia that seemed like a habit of disordered eating and although i do like alex as a person, the reply he gave you rlly didnt sit right w me. i dont blame him, he probably just doesn't realize. but either way if you do struggle with an ed, i'm always here for you and if you ever want anyone to talk to, vent to, or for tips in how to go about an ed safely, please let me knowbecause i'd love to help take care of you and make sure you're staying safe.

hi lovely ilyt pls /p

it's fine, im fine we're all fine. i havent counted my cals or had under 800 cals a day in like a month maybe a little over that so everything's fine again. i just still have the habit of looking at the calories :) i am eating the proper amount of calories (?).

i have been thinking abt going back to doing it but we arent bc... you can like die from it or wtv </3

i didnt take offence to what alex said. i laugh at myself abt it lmfao. i didnt mean to worry anyone im so sorry pls-

[cloudyshit]

Fukuzawa x Reader

Such a lovely day

Well this is my first time so pls tell me if there is something wrong and dont worry critisize me there not gonna be hurtful as my mom telling me im a dissapointment oh and yeah first time lol.

Summary:Your husband Fukuzawa is busy and is on a meeting you decide to pay a visit to your little brother Mori and after that shit you went to go back to the agency just to find a madness.

Well your hubby is on a business meeting  and you dont know what to do well you can look after the agency but you were lazy and just dump your responsibility to Kunikida you felt bad but he was free.

Well since you have nothing to do you decided to go to your lovely brother Mori yeah actually he is son of a bitch but he your lil bro anyway so you decided to pay him a visit.

You went to the building and everyone was chill they know who you are so they just didn't mind so you dramatically went your way to the hallways as everyone was staring at you now that your infront of the big doors you were so dramatic you just kick that door and it made Mori startled at the sudden action but then cool down when he saw you there.

"What are you doing here?" Mori asked "Eh hubby out of town just wanna visit Elise" You answered as you were scanning the room for a little blonde girl and then you spotted her playing with some crayons on the floor so you made your way there and when she saw you she was delighted to see you.

"Y/N-chan you didnt know how i was in pain thank god you dashed in now take me away from this place" Elise said with a dramatic voice and you decided to roll with it "Oh my Elise look at you come with me lets go to Aku-san and annoy the fuck out of him" you said as you lift Elise on your arms.

You and Elise both exited out of the room leaving Mori confused as you went and fashionably walk in on Akutagawa's office Akutgawa was there and was confused why your both there.

"Aku Aku" you sing in a cheery voice "what the fuck do you want lady" Akutagawa said in an annoyed tone "Oh Aku darling can you set up the tea table because me and elise are gonna have a tea party here" You cheerly said "Lady why in all places you chose to have a tea party in my office" He angrily said but keep down his tone "Where am i gonna have the tea party then" You said "I dont know and i dont care" He said "But Aku darling pretty please you can join our tea party it has desserts" You said cheerly "It has! ok im gonna set it up you order the food and tea but can you order one with the strawberries too" Akutagawa said in an excited tone "Sure Aku darling".

You were lazy to go and buy the food so you just ask one of the assistants to buy it for you as Akutagawa was setting up the place Elise was just there being a cutie that she is was just patiently waiting for the tea party to start.

•after all those shit were done•

Now now the tea party is starting with you, elise, and akutagawa just there with your pinkies up and some tea to enjoy a pleasent afternoon.

"So how was your day lovely people?" You asked cheerily "Oh it was awful Mori-san was forcing me to wear so many dresses but thank god you save me from that awful nightmare" She said dramatically "Just killed some karens feeling good" Akutagawa said.

Sudenly someone burst into the room and kick the door down and you were startled by the action and redied your knife but put it back when you noticed its just Hugichi "Hey would you mind not to kick the door down you scared the shit out of me" Akutagawa groaned "Sorry sorry i didn't know i couldn't fine you anywhere and got worried so yeah but my day is been fucking awful can i join the tea chit chat you guys having" Higuchi said excausted "Of course sweetheart here theres an extra cup for you and an extra chair aswell" You said cheerly as Hugichi is making herself comfy from the spot and sipping some tea "Hey pinkies up" Elise demanded "Oh sorry about that" Higuchi lifted her pinkie "Is this ok" She said in a british tone and Elise just nodded in response "Guys today is a shit day for me" Higuchi groaned "What happened?" You asked

"Yeah while i was doing some business some fucking woman was yelling at me because her husband was staring at me even though i fucking told her i don't know any of the shit and was trying to get through my day" Higuchi vented it out as i laugh at the thought of how it would look like "Days rough huh" You replied "Yep fucking people just be meddling with your life when you did nothing" Higuchi said groaning.

You look through your phone and it was 4pm and you decided 'aight its time to see what those motherfuckers are doing at the agency'.

You now excused yourself from the tea party and went to the window.

now now reader your probably thinking to yourself why the hell are you going to the window well you see you are an assasin so jumping probably from the 9th floor through the ground you probably think you just gonn kill yourself but its ok your like a cat and such a fall wont do anything to you it will feel like you just jump from a table but anyway back to the story.

As you opened the windows the curtains wave dramatically and looking at the drop it wasn't that high so you just jump from there feeling the air and breeze through your face until you hit the floor on both of your toes and just walk as if you just didn't jump from a high building that could definitly kill any normal being.

•at the agency•

Your now at the agency and once you entered this is what you see.

A white haired boy on his knees holding something that look like a bomb, poor Tanazaki being taken down by Kunikida which his expressions show rage and frustration to a laughing Dazai.

The scene was fucking weird as it is and you just walking in just made it more akward as it is and since you don't wanna deal with this shit you legit just went in the window open it and jump everyone was scared because they know they will get their ass whoop by Fukuzawa if his wife is hurt or because there worried about you still its those reasons.

imagine this but just you walking and jumping out of the window

Well you didn't have the mind or brain to process on what you did so you just accepted on what would happen plus worst case scenario you having broken bones.

Fortunately you were saved and was now on someones arms and it was your one and only hubby.

"Hell hubbs" you said cheerly as if you just didn't drop from another high building "Hi love would you mind telling me on why you just drop from above?" He asked "Eh something happened and i dont know what to do" You answered he just nodded on what you said as he drop you on to your feet and both of you went inside and you dashed into his office not wanting to be in the shit that you had walked in.

Day went well and you were just on the office chilling until you and Fukuzawa went home.

Well it was a weird day but you found out that it was an exam and the white hair guy was a new member of the agency and the next day you immidiately greeted him and just fell in love to the point you decided that you will love this boy like its your son well i dont how Fukuzawa felt because he got weirded out since you were trying to cook chazuke but he didn't mind since you do what you want and there is nothing for him to do.

This is my first fic lol i know it bad it aint formal shit but i tried

[pepperpixel]

thoughts and feelings about. my life below the cut. like depression and shit?? u aint gotta read this shit if u dont wanna lol

warning i basically wrote this post like a fuckin diary cuz i wanted to write my thoughts out. so its super jumbled and messy. pls don’t feel like you have to respond, this is just for me to talk lol. vent some stuff. clear the air of my brain.

these past months since graduating high school I basically haven’t taken a moment to think about anything ever. i wake up in the morning i have like. mini waffles and coffee. i watch a couple videos and then draw draw draw for the entirety of the day. i might eat something else. or i might not, i might drink something else, or i might not. and then i lay down and watch more videos until 3-5 am. i then go to sleep. or i don’t. and then i wake up. repeat repeat repeat. every single day. with a few exceptions. of course i’ve gone out a couple times and had fun. but then i go back home. and do the same thing i’ve been doing. for the past months. on autopilot... over and over and over again. i watch the same videos over and over and over again. i draw and then hate everything i make over and over and over again... and i don’t even have the space to be upset about it... because im always doing something to not think about the stuff that bugs me. its just like im a robot on a cycle.and im not even doing the things i need to do. im doing pointless things. im doing the same pointless things over and over, and i have this constant dread in my heart that everything’s gonna come crashing down on me and i just keep ignoring it. and not doing anything about it. until im laying in bed every night and it hits me. but i still keep not doing anything. and my life continues to be nothing. day in and day out.

anyway... i cried today for the first time in a while, and im actually happy about it.... i used to cry all the time. about everything. and i hated it then. but. i like, haven’t given myself the space or time to feel emotions... or feel human.. in what feels like a rlly long time. and i don’t know exactly how but for some reason today i just started thinking. about all the stuff thats changed in my life that i’ve been avoiding thinking about all these months. and i thought about how it made me upset.. i allowed myself to be upset. instead of just brushing it off cuz im “supposed to be stronger now” because i’ve been to therapy and i don’t have panic attacks anymore and thats all that rlly matters right?? all that other stuff that makes me unhappy can just be brushed aside because its manageable. everyone has to deal with bad stuff. why should i be especially upset about it, just move on, just don’t think about it. sure you’re literally eating and drinking barely anything every day and u get an average of 4-2 hours of sleep each night and u barely feel like you’re still alive but that doesn’t mean anything! this is just what life is post graduation! youre fine!!

so. crying kind of. reminded me how it felt to. feel stuff?? like,, it made me feel normal again. like a real person. which im happy about.. i feel like it knocked some sense into me or something.

i used to write down how i felt a lot too. to work thru my feelings and get them out of my head. i haven’t written down or talked with anyone about my feelings in awhile cuz i haven’t thought about my feelings in awhile... but im writing stuff down now cuz it feels like the right thing to do, its what i wanna do. and i still can’t 100% sort thru all of my feelings. there’s still that vague stale miasma.. the dread of the unknown of adulthood. the worry of being a failure, but. im so happy to have taken the time to just feel some of the feelings that i can sort thru. nothing new bad happened. i didn’t have a panic attack. i just cried a bit and got upset over some stuff i’ve been ignoring.. it feels a little like a break through.. and it made me want to feel more.. honestly.. its better then this awful nothing repetition. i’m gonna try to work on being more human from here on out. thats a weird way to put it but i don’t know how else to phrase it? just, taking more time to breathe. to just be alive in the moment. in real life. not on a computer. ((also, i kno thats a thing dumb old ppl say but like.. being obsessively glued to my computer to avoid real life is part of the issue. im not even doing anything of substance im just.. doing jack shit nothing)) i don’t need to do everything right now. sometimes i just need to sit in my own brain and sort stuff out... and then i can really focus more on the stuff i actually need to do. maybe then i can start really feeling in control of my own life. idk.

anyway... tldr i felt emotions,,, it was a mixed bag.. hopeful for future??

[promiscuous-jalapeno]

me rn