#oh my fucking god I hate you

[dootznbootz]

I will squish you like a grape.

[cozylittleartblog]

@staff if you [change] the [design] of the fucking [dashboard] i will kill you

edit. i want it on the actual post that i am not actually making a de-th threat against the staff. that's shitty. the caption quotes the fucking costco hot dog meme, which i originally said in the tags. if any staff member sees this please do Not take it personally

[evelynpr]

Congratulations My Hero Academia for providing, possibly, the biggest and longest legit straightbaiting yet in shonen history.

Bonus points that their final chapter was released on yaoi day.

[papanowo]

get a grip loverboy !!!

[j-liz]

Having an hour to spare after the recent chapter is a blessing and a curse.

So I drew the babies.

[lazylittledragon]

ok i swear i'm not going to talk about my breakup forever but the thing that just keeps bothering me:

i know that not getting what you need in a relationship is a COMPLETELY valid reason to end it but also. i feel like having a very vulnerable moment where i opened up about my struggles with intimacy and being relieved that i didn't have to keep doing things i wasn't comfortable with, then being dumped a YEAR later because of my lack of intimacy. is something i should be allowed to be very hurt by???

[dizzybizz]

some haikyuus

[theythemmer]

phinktober day 11: ur fav AU

i dont rlly do AUs so i just drew them how i wish they would dress xo

(dan’s tats r carnations and snowdrops and phil’s r roses and honeysuckle. for no reason 🤗)

ALSO bonus version w makeup bc i couldn’t pick <3

[teehee-vibes]

Hi guys. I’m behind on JRWI-Tober. Here’s my progress so far.

1) Riptide

2) Fave PC

3) Fave NPC

4) Campaign swap

[cozylittleartblog]

valentines newsletter ???? ?? HELLO ???????? ?????? ? ????

[pisces-swirlix]

after my first #netflixhate post, i spent weeks and weeks gathering data on other incidents. and now, after having just seen a post about midnight club, the circle is finally complete.

btw i will continue gathering these and my next one is gonna be a picture of julius caesar (netflix) getting stabbed 23 times by his own council members (the ghosts of Netflix Originals past)

[tiredyke]

every time queer discourse surges on this site everyone is so quick to jump to “it was actually the evil lesbians who divided us” because y’all heard the term “political lesbian” and never bothered to figure out what that meant

[willowser-but-nsfw]

sometimes i imagine bakugou getting so turned on by like. the most inane things and being so mad about it LOL

at four in the morning, coming home from patrol, and he's so fucking tired and sweaty and greasy and the first thing he does is head straight for a shower. and he passes through your room and you're sprawled out all wild in the bed, a leg hanging half off the mattress, and you're in a too-big shirt of his that's ridden up at your ribs, giving him a clear view of your soft stomach and how easily you're breathing.

and i think he gets severe, primitive cute aggression !! because you're so sweet and soft and dead to the world and safe in his home !! and he just gets to stand there and watch you for a little bit and he kind of wants to talk to you, misses you and wants your attention, gets a funny feeling in his stomach that he brushes off as goddamn butterflies, because he's so in love with you that it's sickening, but he goes off to take his shower. half asleep himself under the stream, letting the hot water loosen some of his tension, uncoiling the muscles in his back and his shoulders and scrubbing his skin until it's warm and tender. and when he gets out, he grabs a towel to run over his face and through his hair and his mouth is open and he just. inhales the scent of you. because he's picked up your towel by accident and it's still a little damp and reeks of your body wash.

and then he's just like a dog akdbehshak eyes pop open so wide when he realizes it's not talking that he wants to do with you. can't stop replaying the blissed out look on your face from the other day when he had you underneath him. blood rushes from his head so fast that it could make him sick, and he peeks out the bathroom door to see you still stretched out, the material of his shirt caught underneath you and pulled taut over the soft swell of your breast and he didn't realize before, but you're sleeping in those athletic shorts that are too tight and too short and if you lifted your leg a little higher, he could see your ass-cheek and —

so he's just left standing there LOL stark naked, dick hard, still dripping from the shower, your towel shoved up to his face like a fucking animal, thinking oh no. oh fuck. what now. because he's not gonna wake you up for this, and his body is exhausted. can feel the depth of the circles under his eyes, he probably looks like shit. gotta work early afternoon, so katsuki thinks maybe if he gets a solid three hours of sleep, he'll be ready to go before you have to get up for work.

just lays down beside you and stares at the ceiling. face red, because he's so pissed that he's suddenly 21 again and doesn't know how to get himself together around you. and it doesn't help when you wiggle around to cuddle up to him, placing a hand on his chest as you hum out a sleepy, "welcome home."

(of course, you like to talk to him after work, too, especially when your schedules clash and there's not much time to spend together. your body wakes up on instinct when you feel the bed sink with his weight, and he's very short with you and you don't understand until he rolls on his side and pulls you back against him, and then you're finally opening your eyes and peeking over your shoulder at him because, "are you hard right now?" but katsuki just buries his face in your hair and grumbles to himself. you don't think there's anything remotely sexy about you right now, but he nips you when you laugh and you really don't mind that much when he peels your shorts off, anyway.)

[tippenfunkaport]

That viral post that's going around about how people who write "book quality" mlm fic are too "normal" to publish and have real jobs so only "weird" people publish their "shitty" fanfic is so completely out of touch with reality and I am giving a massive side eye to everyone reblogging it.

Not only is it completely, easily verifiably untrue (you cannot enter any professional writing space without tripping over a dozen grizzled scifi writers who got their start by filing off the serial numbers and publishing their Star Trek fanfic even going back decades ago??? it's a whole thing?? plus how can you look at the mlm category on Amazon right now and say with a straight face that people aren't publishing shitty Spirk and Stucky fanfic??? Oh, honey...) it's also the perfect example of this kind of sneering elitism that true artists would never sully themselves by seeking profit, they do it only for the purity of the thing that always somehow leads back to, "no one should be paid to make art, actually."

The only reason you're seeing more published fanfic right now has nothing to do with the idealistic purity of your hypothetical government employee written smut of the past vs the debased scribbles of those awful straights of today and everything to do with the fact that a) self-publishing has created a voracious readership that wants a ton of content so it's become a viable, flexible income stream for many, especially disabled people b) anyone can publish now with self-publishing tools so there are less gatekeepers and c) lockdown got a lot of people into fandom and therefore writing who never tried it before.

And if you really think there's no "shitty" published mlm and no "book-quality" m/f writing out there that started as fanfic, then you are clearly not a reader so why are you even talking about this?

[naggingatlas]

'thats not his role in the story!' hm i wonder what the point of it is then. hm i wonder what the dead pixel scene means. hm i wonder what wrong organ are trying to say with the context of 'awesome male friendship' and 'corporate hell where the only woman onboard is constantly under ridicule, abused or forcibly forgotten yet is the catalyst' if not this. hm i wonder how curly's physical agony being a direct parallel to anya's mental agony, stripped of voice, agency, just like her, and being forced to watch what happens while not doing jack shit, just like he used to, plays a part in this. i wonder what the moral of him being the final girl says about living with the consequences of your inaction, because of sentimentality, because of status, career and social. hm i wonder whatever the fuck this game was trying to say. hm i wonder what else is on this person's blog Oh Lord there's yaoi penice.

[i-drop-level-one-loot]

✨2000 FOLLOWER CELEBRATION!!!✨

Kirtch

I want to thank all of you for being such a wonderful community! I've gotten a few really good suggestions on what I should do for my 2K celebration, but the amount of people demanding more to the Human Pet trilogy is o v e r w h e l m i n g, lol so here you go ❤️ Thank you so much for enjoying my stories

CW: Monster fucking, yandere relationship, bittersweet feels

Ten years had passed since (Reader) was abducted from their home planet.

Kirtch smiled joyfully, chest swelling with adoration as his pet woke up from their slumber, stumbling into his office sleepily. Their skin glowed, a result of their carefully formulated diet made for humans, and the healthy layer of squish that had formed around their body was the result of Kirtch's pampering and excess treats. (Reader) was still just as cute as the day he saw them in the marketplace, now happier than ever.

They yawned, rubbing their eyes as they teetered over towards Kirtch, raising their arms to be picked up without speaking. Chuckling, Kirtch lifted them easily into his lap, rubbing their back as (Reader) struggled to wake up. "Good morning, pet. Did you sleep well?"

(Reader) smiled on reflex, leaning into the hard chest they had learned to find comfortable. His rough fingers ran up to their neck as he massaged them, feeling the track mark scar that would never fully fade. It was such a shame, that rounded reminder of darker days, when (Reader) was so unhappy and needed strict training. But that was all in the past. (Reader) had learned to love Kirtch, which meant he could spoil them to his heart's content.

Their body was bigger than before, but Kirtch found that they still nestled perfectly in his arms.

Inside (Reader's) mind, every day was a haze.

Like a dream they couldn't escape.

It took well over a year, having their brains practically liquified with chemicals to lose their grasp on who they were as a person. Memories of their parents melted away, leaving only strange blobs of abstract color that held no distinct shape, along with friends past lovers. (Reader) sometimes dreamt in their native tongue, hearing themselves in the language they spoke for the majority of their life, but in the morning (Reader) was speaking in Kirtch's language, something they had willingly desired to learn. (Reader) learned many tricks since they started living with Kirtch.

In the mirror by their rarely used bed, (Reader's) reflection had become as alien to them as the faces of the crew members on board the ship.

Part of (Reader) wondered if they should be concerned by that fact. But, outside of their time with Kirtch, (Reader) felt apathetic. It wasn't useful to have thoughts that weren't happy.

Dressed in beautiful silks, (Reader) draped their arms around Kirtch's shoulders, placing gentle kisses along his jaw.

At the beginning of their "relationship", Kirtch first viewed sex as a way to release his pet, then he began to crave it as a way to please his pet, wanting to do anything that to make his pet happy.

Now, it was something that was special. It still didn't fulfill Kirtch physically, as nothing could change his bodily functions, but if anyone else were to suggest that they "released" his (Reader) for him, Kirtch would kill them without a second thought. It was a special time for Kirtch, knowing that only he could make his precious (Reader) feel good.

Scaled fingers sunk deep into the fat of (Reader's) thighs as they pressed their lips against his face more roughly. (Reader) felt their lips begin to bruise as they kissed Kirtch's mouth, unfazed by his inhuman anatomy by this point in their relationship.

Yes, this was his pet. No one else was allowed to love them, touch them, like he did. Although he knew that one day (Reader's) life would come to an end, Kirtch knew that the ecstasy he felt by (Reader's) side would last for a hundred years after they were gone. There were no replacements for his (Reader), and honestly he felt no need for any other additions to his life either.

(Reader's) face was cupped in Kirtch's hands as the kisses became more passionate and frantic; (Reader's) hands slipping into his robes to feel his armored chest. Everything about (Reader) was too precious for words.

As his large, jewel like eyes gazed into (Reader's), he sometimes wondered if their lives could have been differently. Through many decades of studying humans Kirtch had learned of many different cultures and their mythologies, and although he knew that none of them were true, he sometimes fantasized about being reborn with (Reader) as humans, living and loving together in each other's arms, without the need for a collar.

His pelvis opened, revealing himself to (Reader), who excitedly removed their hands from his abdomen to caress his exposed member. Kirtch would do anything to protect that smile.

It never failed to fascinate him, the look on (Reader's) face as they slid down onto his dick. The way they scrunched up their nose before relaxing, sighing as Kirtch filled them entirely. (Reader's) body was fascinating. Kirtch could feel pressure whenever their muscles clenched around him; feel the vibrations from the shuddering of their quivering abdominals. Even if he couldn't feel the same stimulation, it was still a magical experience because he was allowed to experience it with his (Reader).

It was difficult, not staring at (Reader) in awe as they used his shoulders as leverage to bounce on his lap, moaning and gasping and biting their lip as they used his body for their pleasure. The strange slime that was his pre-cum creating a loud schlicking noise that echoed throughout Kirtch's sound proof room.

Assisting (Reader) by grabbing their ass cheeks and moving their body, Kirtch smiled as they spasmed, their red sweaty face letting out the sweetest sound of all as they climaxed around his cock. Kirtch allowed himself the release into their still twitching hole, forcing (Reader) to arch their back at the stimulation.

It was another beautiful day, with (Reader) filled with Kirtch's cum, still grinding against his hips and overstimulating themselves for fun, taking advantage of the fact that Kirtch could keep his erection as long as he pleased, even after cumming.

"I love you, pet." Kirtch whispered, placing his cold forehead on (Reader's) feverish one.

"I -I love you too!" (Reader) cried out, chasing another orgasm. Their body fell limp as another climax rolled like a large wave across their body, forcing out Kirtch's fluids which gushed back down over his dick and shelled thighs.

Kirtch was content.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you all so much for loving Kirtch ❤️

And thank you all so so so so much for enjoying my writing enough to follow me!!!

We reached 2K followers while I was sleeping, and I am just floored.

Since this is a special, I have a little announcement..

I am planning a part 4 🎉

It's going to be extremely long, and won't come out until after kinktober finishes, but I've already begun the planning phase for the story ❤️

So, some other little facts about Kirtch!

I often read my stories out loud under my breath while writing, and for names I just say whatever feels natural sounding during the introduction for the character. For aliens and monsters without human names I sound out what feels right, then quickly Google it to make sure it isn't a real name lol

I wanted his exoskeleton to look like those big black beetles found in the garden that have a green sheen when the light hits them, except purple instead of green. And I when visualizing him I wanted his eyes to look like crystals, and what's more alien than opals? Many gem stone colors can be recreated with colored contacts, but I've never seen opal colored contacts, because of all the different colors opals have ❤️

Don't judge my art too much, I'm not an artist lol

It was difficult figuring out how a hard shelled creature would emote, but I think I figured it out haha

And bonus, Kirtch's slutty feet

Put those things away!

Again, thank you all so much for being such a wonderful community ❤️

And I hope you continue enjoying my stories in the future!!!!