#not man just….not anything on the binary
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
Ok so this isn’t like ragebait so please don’t get mad. I wanna have a response to people who throw tantrums and go “so why can cis men be lesbians” in response to trans men being lesbians and I’m not good at articulating things so I was wondering if you have anything I could use?
hey good question!
my answer to someone saying that would be "kill the cop in your head".
inform them that bigender trans women exist. multigender, genderfluid, genderqueer, gnc non binary, intersex, two-spirit and gender variant trans female lesbians exist. transfemme lesbian men exist.
intersex male lesbians exist.
cisgender male lesbians are not a threat to you or me. who cares if a cishet man identifies as a lesbian? they probably have a good reason to. remind them that cishet men who find lesbian erotica attractive generally are pretty vocal about disliking IRL lesbians. most cishet men do not want to be associated with dykes. this isn't an issue of cishet men potentially invading the queer community. if they wanted to identify as lesbians, they would be doing so already. and so what if a cishet man genuinely feels like a lesbian? why's that anybody's place to insert themselves into?
on no planet is this a reasonable hill to die on, is what i would tell a person like that. hope that helps somewhat! i get that as a "zinger" all the time and my answer is always kill the cop in your mind. i'm not here to police anyone. i'm just here to inform. what they do with these labels and identities is not up to me, i can't control them. if someone uses labels in a way i don't like, i simply care about something else.
86 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hey, mama. I'm not American but I live in a country with very strict laws about LGBT and porn and stuff. And you know what, literally NOTHING changed with these laws. Noone can take your queerness from you, noone can forbid you be who you are (woman, man, non binary, whatever). But I've never thought you'd be THAT angry over something that didn't even happen yet. Don't you understand ppl vote against this anger ("fuck men", "make everyone uncomfy", "double the suffering and gelive it to trump")? I have no respect for anyone who's trying to take yours from you. But you're doing exactly what they want to do. The only difference is they are against queer and you're against straight. You can send me to hell or not reply in any way. But in a four year time you'll see, that your life didn't cange much. Trust me. People always find the way to do what they want to do. Breathe out girl. Everything's gonna be okay. Even if it doesn't seem like it now.
Yes, I will take this opportunity to “send you to hell”, thank you lol
This is all a backwards line of thinking. This isn’t just another candidate that’s running for President and another candidate that we’ll move on from in four years; this is a man that’s been elected President that will alter and change the trajectory of our country and our government structures itself. Democracy will no longer exist the way that it has for 250 years, if at all.
He has already made announcements of forcing the government to only acknowledge two genders, of punishing teachers with civil crimes if they try and teach anything but, of altering education in schools to only teach about man and wife, man and woman.
What do you mean, “breathe out”?
This is the man that overturned Roe v. Wade, that stripped women of the rights to their bodies. He appointed extreme and conservative Supreme Court Justices that will make similar decisions for this country until the day they die. This is the man that wants to force all women to have unwanted pregnancies at any age, for any reason, even if it might kill them and even if they are the product of rape. He wants to make it illegal for pregnant women to cross state lines, wants the government to track women’s periods, wants to get rid of birth control as a whole.
“Breathe out”?
He wants to make interracial marriage illegal, wants to make gay marriage illegal, wants to get rid of the Department of Education and radicalize education to where everyone prays in school and learns a very white-washed education (moreso than now) that focuses on how amazing America is. He wants to jeopardize school funding more than it is and wave it over districts heads as a threat. Public school and children will suffer more than it ever has.
That’s just scratching the surface.
It shouldn’t matter that it hasn’t happened yet; we’ve barely recovered from the effects of his last presidency. The hate he encouraged and spewed is something I’m not sure we’ll ever recover from at all. It hasn’t happened yet, but he’s outlined exactly how it’s going to happen and exactly what we should expect.
And you think I should take a deep breath?
I’m happy that your life is exactly the same as it was before your laws were put into place. But this is WAY more than a focus on LGBTQIA+ communities. This is our entire livelihood. This is our entire government, country, communities, futures at stake. And this is extremely personal, even as a white woman in a straight presenting relationship. I can’t imagine the fear that any woman or person of color or any trans person or anyone in a gay marriage is feeling.
I’m angry for myself, my two young daughters. I’m angry for the women in my life who have to put their future plans on hold or who have to decide right now if they want to get pregnant or start a family now and are mourning for the loss of it. I’m angry for my best friend who is a woman of color who now has to wait and see if her marriage will end up being legal, whose safety I worry for every single day. I’m angry for all of my trans friends who have to yet again question why this country hates them so much and doesn’t cherish and love them for existing as they are.
I’m angry. I feel rage in my body and spirit that I have not once felt before and that’s with me being one of the lucky ones to receive generations of trauma and anger I have to work through. I’ve never felt anger like this, this stagnant, still, villain era anger. And I’ll be damned if I don’t use it for good because I think it’s ridiculous of you to say that I should be quiet and let the other side, the side that instills fear in others and wishes to take away their very basic human rights, be louder than I am.
Fuck that to the highest degree.
I’m about to use my privilege to scream my love and my support for those in need from the highest of mountaintops. And if that comes in the form of screaming my hatred for men, the patriarchy, Republicans, and conservatives directly back to them then I sure as shit will be doing that; they are the ones with hate in their heart who are wishing to take away the rights of others. I didn’t vote for that. If my hatred comes in other forms like becoming a part of local community groups with like minds, supporting local and black-owned businesses, supporting my local library, educating my daughters to be empathetic and supportive, standing up for women in public if need be, then I will also sure as shit be doing that.
The world deserves my anger.
This was an ignorant ask to send. I don’t hate straight people; that’s just outright fucking stupid. I don’t think you’re educated enough on the subject to be sending me an ask that is effectively telling me to calm down, WHICH IS SO FUNNY because that’s what women are always told when they’re hysterical, because this is much much more than just the rights of LGBTQIA+ people and another President being elected.
Sure, I hope you’re right and that everything is the same in four years. But you’re wrong.
Sure, I’ll breathe out. But then I’m going to take a deep breath in and scream my support at the top of my lungs even if it comes in the form of hating men, conservatives, Republicans, and Trump.
Please don’t pretend as if you know me. This is the internet, this is fandom, this is somewhat of a persona.
Yes, I am angry. I can’t understand how people are not.
34 notes
·
View notes
Text
My thoughts on Dragon Age: The Veilguard
So, I finished datv yesterday and now have time to sit and think about it. Now, obviously this is just my subjective opinion, so take it with a grain of salt. I am going to start with the good and go into the bad and then finish with more good (that teacher training coming in). Also, I learned how to do a read more for this.
I am going to start with the combat. I have made another post about this, but that was like 3 hours into my first playthrough. Veilguard has the best combat in the series. Usually Dragon Age games have combat that is a slog to get through, so much so that many people in the fandom say they don't play the games for combat but for the story. I have never been a fan of the real-time with tactical pause, I find it a little boring. I am not a big fan of turn-based, to begin with ( that is one of the reasons I still have not finished Baulder's Gate). In the past, if I wanted to play a good story game with fun combat, I would play Mass Effect. But I have fun just fighting enemies, if DAI's combat was this fun I would replay it more often.
Next the art direction. Now, I am no artist and I know next to nothing about anything. But I really like the art. I think the environments are beautiful. I like the character models. I know people were complaining about the models having small heads in the lead-up to the release, but I think it was because the game doesn't use heroic proportions. And you don't notice in-game at all, at least I didn't. Also the brought back some reused assets from the Inquisition, and some of the paintings that have been around since Origins.
Okay the companions. I might write a longer post for each companion later on. I am going in alphabetical order.
Bellara: I romanced her, and I love her so much. She has some strong Tali vibes with a strong dose of ADHD. I am a little sad that we did not even kiss until after the final battle, but I just read that as her being ace or demi (like me!).
Davrin: He is such a bro. I love him and Assan so much. His banter with Emmrich is so funny. The ending to his story line is a little weak, but I will talk about that in his own post.
Emmrich: I think Emmrich is one of the best companions in the whole series, flat out. I love this man, he going to be my next romance (Female Qunari Grey Warden).
Harding: Harding is great. I really liked all of the Titan stuff in her storyline. I did get her killed, so I am not sure what her ending is like. I did think her romance with Taash was cute.
Lucanis: I'm going to say it. I think Lucanis is the weakest of the companions, I don't dislike him. I don't if I missed a lot of content because I saved Minrathous instead of Treviso or if it was because his writer got canned during development. And what he did have felt bare bones. I thought we would be dealing with Spite a lot more. I will say his recruitment mission is a blast.
Neve: I played a Shadow Dragon so my character had a lot of in common with Neve. I like her, but I don't have any strong feelings towards her one or another. Her romance with Lucanis is a thing that happens. I might change my mind when I get around to romancing her.
Taash: I am cis, so take this with a grain of salt. But I think their storyline about being non-binary was oddly paced. I did like everything past that, I think it was much better paced. I do like them a lot. Also, they are really cute with Harding. I do wish there was more of a reaction to me getting Harding killed on Tearstone Island, but that is a writing complaint.
Speaking of the writing. It is really a mixed bag. Some of it is great and then some of it was giving slop comics from the mid-00s. The first several hours are story slog, some of that is because of all the lore dumps, and some of it is because it is oddly paced. The writing gets progressively better throughout the game. From the point of no return to the credits it is the strongest writing, maybe not in the whole series but definitely since the last third of DAI. That after-credit scene was a choice. I will probably talk about that more after I figure out how I feel about it. I think Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nan are the strongest villains since Loghain, it really helps that they are present throughout the game. There are definitely moments where you feel that Rook is HR, but not a lot, but enough that I understand why that made it into some reviews. I don't think it is any more quippy or Marvel-like than any other Dragon Age game, "Swooping is bad" comes to mind.
Finally, some random thoughts. I think this game really nailed the horror of the Blight, I can't get the image of Bellara wrapped in Blight tentacles during the final section out of my head.
I played a non-mage elf shadow dragon, and there was a lot of reactivity for the shadow dragon part, less the elf part. I know I missed a conversation with Tarquin about it, but still. It's like no one even noticed the pointy ears.
That's it for now. I might add more as think about it.
8/10, I had a blast.
#dragon age veilguard#dragon age the veilguard#datv spoilers#bellara#lucanis dellamorte#emmrich volkarin#taash#neve gallus#lace harding
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#really exhausted by the continuous internal gender struggle#I’m afab who enjoys feminity so why do I always feel like:#woman?#I feel sometimes like I’m half woman and half something else#not man just….not anything on the binary#I hate it because you have a bunch of shitty people who say:#on you just have internal misogyny#but I don’t feel discontent with the feminity I do possess#I just feel like it’s not all there is#I would prefer to be called they#but being called she isn’t upsetting and is easier to navigate the world with#and often enjoyable when I’m reaching for the celebration of feminity#if I could have a face that was perfectly androgynous#(in these sense that you could not tell agab when looking at it)#I would love it#and sometimes I wish I had a completely flat chest#and a deeper voice (like Cher!)#but neither can I say I hate my breasts or the face I do have#because frankly I think they’re very beautiful#and I love feeling beautiful#I’m just so frustrated and feel lonely#I feel like I’m not queer enough to be considered queer and still too queer for everyone else#to actually be open about how I feel about gender in real life#and I don’t feel comfortable being called trans#because I don’t feel like I’m transitioning genders#I just feel so frustrated#and lost
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Funny how all it takes is a couple of conversations with a cis straight man about gender to make me go "yup I'm definitely not cis"
#listen I adore my stepfather ok but he's got a pretty traditional view of gender#he's very respectful of others and doesn't enforce it on anyone else#and I think it's not that toxic all things considered bc he sees 'manhood' as being primarily about being hard working and protecting other#but it's still very gender essentialist#and he sees a lot of things as 'man things' and 'woman things'#and talks about skills and roles that are 'men's'#and I'm just like well but I do a lot of those things. but I identify with a lot of the things you describe.#and he tries to go around it like 'ahh well but you have personal history with that' etc etc#we get along really well tho we don't fight or anything but it's interesting to me#it makes me realize just how much I'm outside of the binary in the eyes of cis people#and how much 'trying to be a man' or 'trying to be a woman' are things that hold no emotional meaning to me(personally)#I could not care less what makes me masculine or feminine or if either of those labels are revoked for some reason#taking on the label of woman or man feels like a burden to me bc it always comes with a set of expectations#I just wanna be me yk. I just want people to see me through the lens of 'this is a person'#'this is what this person likes. this is how this person behaves'#I just wanna turn off gender. can I do that? like just flip a switch and no one perceives me as anything anymore#in a perfect world maybe#sleep.txt#I honestly still don't fully understand how I feel about gender but. I know that I don't like being put into a box#the box is Evil.
42 notes
·
View notes
Text
I have never related to a character more than I do to lake. like they just ARE the trans experience they’re literally ME they are so unbelievably fucking important to me it’s not even funny. trans people watch infinity train if you like good cartoons and also want to genuinely cry your fucking eyes out
#infinity train#infinity train lake#mirror tulip#infinity train mt#see this is why representation is important man#they’re not even canonically trans or non binary but seeing my own feelings represented in fiction is just so wonderful I could sob#NOT TO GET DEEP OR ANYTHING HAHA 🥲#I just love them dude so much#trans#transgender#transmasc#trans man#transfemme#transfem#trans girl#mtf#ftm#non binary#lgbt#lgbtq
29 notes
·
View notes
Text
Well would you look at this. 😵💫 Because obviously if you dare say anything as wild and controversial as “lesbians don’t like men, please stop using a label that hurts us and tries to force men into our identity” you’re a raging terf radfem transmisogynist. Because obviously ONLY trans women use the bi lesbian label and it’s not like there are transfem lesbians who are rightfully against the label as well or anything and it’s not like terfs use the label to refer to cis lesbians who date trans women and why can’t you just let people identify as how they want of course lesbians like men stop the infighting already if you disagree with me that lesbians can like men then surely that’s because you’re an exclusionist gatekeeper who hates trans women.
#lesbian#anti-bi lesbian#trans women#lesbophobia#the raging hatred for lesbians on this site is getting to an all-time high y'all will stop at NOTHING to gaslight us and make us out to be#hateful terf bitches for our sexuality#how many times are we going to do this same old song and dance#no i will not calm down i will be taken seriously#you CANNOT be a bi women as a lesbian idfc if you’re trans or cis#lesbians do not like men and bi women shouldn’t have to ‘pick a side’ by calling themselves lesbians#it’s absurd maddening and sad how little y’all respect us#and trans women always have a place in the lesbian community that doesn’t mean that ACTUAL MEN DO#shit#trying to frame this as ‘well you must be a terf if you are against bi lesbians’ is a shitty move and you’re not being original or clever#go fuck yourself#trans lesbians exist and are valid and the bi lesbian label hurts them just like it hurts cis lesbians if anything it hurts them more so#and i will block ANYONE who supports bi lesbians it doesn’t matter if they’re a trans woman a cis woman a trans man non-binary etc idfc#stop trying to frame this as exclusionary radfem rhetoric#bi lesbian as a term DOES support corrective rape idgas what lesbophobes like you want to say about it#that’s all goodbye#sorry but this got me mad you do not get to use transmisogyny as a clutch to spout blatant ass lesbophobia#i’m so tired of this shit#blocklist#op
87 notes
·
View notes
Text
god i wish trans healthcare was just like. a fuckin casual thing. i wish i could go to my doc and be like ‘hey this is the result i want: what hormones & methods would be best to achieve it’ or even just like. ‘hey i wanna try this’. i wish that level of comfort on the topic and respect for bodily autonomy was just a thing instead of having to go so far in depth into diagnosis and full social transition and all that just to get Proper Medical Advice And Treatment
#like. not to tmi but im afab and im fine w that#i enjoy a lot of it but. i think i would like some amt of bottom growth— not a full penis or anything#just yknow. expand what i got.#but. I can’t DO THAT.#for one without the other effects of testosterone and like. IS there a way I could get that with lesser other effects? probably!#but who’s to say! im not seeing a doctor abt it!#least of all bc I doubt it would ever work (even ignoring that I live in a red state) bc so much current trans healthcare is. full binary#I don’t want to be a man nor do I want to posit myself as one to Get T yknow.#I just wish it was more normal and cool to just. Do That. bc you can or want to. no explanation or whatever required
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
its insane that even tho taemin for years now has been like "im gona break the gender barriers im gona straddle the line between man and woman," ppl have such an averse reaction to anyone pointing that out or commenting on it. you dont have to be annoyed at people pointing out taemingender when taemin is doing the gender stuff in the first place. and you definitely dont have to "protect" him from people playing along. they even tried to get that super junior guy in trouble for this.
#99.txt#i dont know anything abt what hes done besides that (the suju guy) so dont bring it up#but it must suck to be taemin in this situation lol#''im gona show something neither man nor woman'' the fans: wow he looks so neither man nor woman.#& then ppl go ''u CANT SAY THAT about him !!!!!!!!!!!!''#LONG SIGH#also i know why its transphobia and gender binary. but yeah#like he keeps pushing it further which is so awesome & yet some people are just REPELLED by it and pretend they dont see it
25 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ok I've had some time to chill, lemme say a bunch of things I DID like about The Star Beast:
The right vibes are back. THIS feels like Doctor Who and I have a lot of faith in what's to come once they have time to pace things out
The characters are great. A+
Made me laugh
Silly practical effects!
Obviously Marvelous MARVELOUS to have Donna back with us, even if it's just for a little while
New intro is bangin
New Tardis is Nice. I honestly didn't like the crystal one.
The trans rep comes from a sincere place, I can tell. I think a lot of the gender talk was awkward and confused and kinda. stupid. in places. but. I appreciate it anyway
Really nice that they didn't kill off Wilf despite Bernard Cribbin's passing
#doctor who spoilers#doctor who#doctor who 60th anniversary#sorry for the earlier posts it's just that. some of that shit hit me like a freight train#I don't like how hard they went on like. Rose's transness not just being a normal unremarkable thing#they had to make it some kinda alien magic thing#and have her get deadnamed for kinda no reason#and just make such a DEAL out of it#idk man shit like that just makes me feel like some kinda spectacle#it was too much. I found it embarrassing. not to mention how a lot of the messaging was contradictory and just. odd?#but that's just me#I'm not here to say whether they did anything definitively wrong#I wasn't necessarily *upset* either#I actually cracked tf up at "Binary! ..... nonbinary~.....Binary!!''
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
It’s so stupid how adults will go around doing the equivalent of “blue is for boys and pink is for girls” on a global scale (both on queer and straight groups)
#about how people think they’re being so progressive by making one of the characters in a mlm couple feminine#and saying it’s bc he fucks with gender#usually calling them gender fluid#where’s the fluidity tho huh#as a genderfluid person myself I’m not always “fem” presenting#you’re not trying to make him genderfluid you’re trying to reinforce gender roles#also bc#like most non binary people#I think#the concept of something being feminine or masculine is so ??? to me#and then people will try to fight it by saying no actually he is a man so he does man things#as if this is also not a gender role???#why do you try to fight one extreme with another extreme????#“he fucks with gender so as a amab person he’ll dress like a teen hyper fem girl all the time bc this is what being genderfluid means”#“no 😡 he is a boy a boy boy boy he will never do anything that resembles femininity because those are for GIRLS”#excuse me what the fuck#I’m so tired of this bullshit#maybe this doesn’t make any sense and my brain is just incapable of understanding this bc I don’t feel it#what I feel is don’t be such a pussy about everything the concept of masc and fem is dumb get over it
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
today i had this Vivid memory flash through my mind of kissing my ex boyfriend (this was like 2018) and i felt so viscerally fucking revolted and I gotta say. it is truly impressive that I didn’t realise I’m a lesbian sooner than fucking half a year ago
#z talks#like the misidentifying as ace was Inevitable i think. that was due to repression that realising i didnt like men would not have fixed#(context: id’d as bi ace like. i wanna say 2016/17-2021/22 sometime and then went into ace and Questioning)#remember the time i really solidly settled on being aro because ‘romance has never not felt like a chore and putting on a facade’#babe no thats because your most recent and also singular long term relationship was with a Man#and thats the only one youre looking back on#its so funny how i dated a guy and it was so thoroughly Meh that i just didnt feel like pursuing anything romantic for a very long time#(A REACTION I HAD NOT HAD AFTER MY PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS WITH GIRLS)#And DIDN’T somehow consider that maybe I just Didn’t Like Guys#its nothing i grieve or feel sad about dw its honestly mostly funny to look back on#no wrongs were committed and i dont hold a grudge against the guy it was just me being confused and compheted#(…which is also a weird word to apply because at the time i identified and was out to my friends as a trans guy Binary.#This Was Also Wrong.)#was a weird time man. a truly weird time#anyway. all is well i have now been on 2 dates with a really cute girl and she gave me tulips <3#as part of a Care Delivery bc i had a Migraine and No Painkillers Or Snacks#get well flowers <333333#and now i dream of kissing her under the moonlight#With the uh. Hornetposting lately it May seem unlikely but yes I DO interact with real women! Romantically!#They coexist Wonderfully <3#Anyway. I’m gonna go to bed#Realising that im a lesbian solved all my identity problems including my fucking gender which is just fantastic#I am very happy and whenever I think of being a lesbian it grounds me to reality a little bit stronger and i go yeah. Yeah.
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
my favorite activity is listing me using it/its pronouns certain places online and then never using it/its pronouns. they have a use just sitting there more than they do generally being actually used 2 refer 2 me
#someone said it rly well once i cant remember how they described it. its reclaimatory in a sense but like#it/its mostly sits on a shelf to describe a very particular way things like disability and my background interact w my internal view of#myself rather than say anything abt my gender. cuz like im just a 'binary' man. it as a pronoun isnt rly there to say smth abt my#gender im not gnc its more there for like an external comment on the dehumanization ive experienced for aspects of myself particularly#stuff like disability that is very integrated into my sense of self. it/its in a boy dog way
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
im on 4d levels of gender. youre playing checkers while im playing chess. this is a game and i am winning
#‘are you a man or a woman’#‘are you non-binary’#IDK AND I DONT CARE!!!!!#WHO GIVE A SHIT#sorry having gender thoughts and feeling at peace about it all#im not really anything but im not agender im just this thang. sitting here#there’s no label for me other than The Thing#(transgender)#ppl assume I’m a man or non-binary and it’s like hmmmm no. that’s not correct#idk. who give a shit. gender is like clothes
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
being genderfluid is weird bc i sure dont feel nonbinary or trans yet i sure as hell am not cis. im like a secret fourth option. i see the options and i tick “all of the above”
#its weird bc i associate being nonbinary with not feeling connected with the two binaries. but that meaning like. feeling genderless#which yea i know is not Really what that entails#i know its an umbrella term#and also an identity ppl associate with#like the gay or queer labels#but even if its just not connecting with the binary i dont assocjate myself with that either#bc sometimes i Am a woman. i Am a man#though most of the time im not anything other than me#shrugs#min.txt
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
the way that i truly am just non-binary still... idk, surprises me? like, i forget that i am, so i have to remind myself that while i am trans, i'm not a man. at the same time, i'm not a woman. i'm just floating out as something else. something totally new.
but that's why it's so hard for me to affirm myself. there is no exact language to describe me that truly encapsulates my experiences. there's very little representation about what it means to be non-binary. it's why i think about it so much, it's why i fixate on it.
the world is extremely binary, and it's influence over my thoughts is still very strong, despite my gender identity.
it can be lonely. it can be confusing.
my bodily dysphoria is so strong but my social dysphoria is ten fold. to a vast majority of people they will never see me as non-binary no matter how many times i say it, and that haunts me.
i know not everyone will be able to instantly see me as my true self wherever i go and whoever i talk to, but the two binary genders are something that we are innately trained to recognise.
if a person recognises me as 1 or 2 and never 3 instantly, it feels. wrong.
why can't you see me as that? no matter how hard i try; why?
maybe HRT and top surgery will get me there, maybe, hopefully, one day. i want to be seen as androgynous, ambigious, first and foremost. someone who perfectly toes the line of masculinity and femininity. i feel like i am that as a person already but i just want people to be able to see that as soon as they see me.
but ultimately what i truly want is reformation of society. i want- no, need, trans acceptance, and abolishment of gender roles and heteropatriarchy. it's the only way i'll ever be able to thrive and feel comfortable. it's easy for you to people to see man and woman, but i wish it were different. i wish it were more that that.
i still haven't changed my name legally, or moved away from my family, so i'd say i'm in the worst of it. i'm just barely getting enough air to breathe. when i change my name, when i move out, when i go on HRT and get top surgery i will feel better.
but those systems put in place to hold up cisheteronormativity will still exist. i'm not sure how i will feel once i'm up to that point. i'll definitely have more air to breathe. but i can't even picture it right now. i'm still looking up from the well. why do i still have to endure more darkness once i'm fully free to be me?
i really hope for a day where that well won't exist and we'll be able to be on equal level a plain and open field. where we'll get to sit next to each other in the warm gaze of the sun, feeling loved, safe, protected and cared for. where we don't have to fight to exist and feel like ourselves. no conflict, no fighting, no hardship. just ourselves and the purity of it.
#non-binary#nonbinary#ugh. fucking. vent#dysphoria#i think what i also need to get over is my insecurity over being non-binary#specifically. feminine non-binary. it's still a whole process#because i experience such intense dysphoria over being percieved as female i want to just be so separate to any femininity#which is why i think 'maybe i'm just a trans man'#no. i know i'm not. my dysphoria is just so intense#i think when i pass as something other than female and i move out i'll feel a lot better about being non-binary#point is: i am definitely non-binary. i'm just extremely averse to being percieved as female while being feminine#WHICH IS A WHOLE OTHER BAG OF WORMS#I LIKE BEING FEMININE. IT'S WHO I AM. SO IS MY MASCULINITY#DOESN'T MEAN I AM A WOMAN OR A MAN THOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!#abolish gender roles rn i am SO serious#an aside: I’d rather we just not attribute gender or fem/masc to anything at all. please. just see me as me. not as a gender or signifiers
20 notes
·
View notes