#nomorbidity

[rainyfestivalsweets]

198.6

11/2/23

118.4 pounds down

[rainyfestivalsweets]

So.... did the math. 50 pounds in 6 months is a healthy weight loss goal of 2 lbs a week.

That is fantastic! And so so so so so achievable!!

At the gym now, about to head in. Current intake for today is 160 c = 1 Premier Protein Shake. (I was going to do lunch at Panera, plenty of healthy options. But they were beyond packed and their drive thru was closed!)

I have food at home and went shopping this morning. Got lots of single serving snacks and some additional supplements. I didn't buy anything that I went overboard on in the past. I am trying hard not to demonize fruit (after keto, you know how it is).

I did get some no sugar pancake mix and baking mix. Plan to make myself a nice holiday treat. But they have to be baked so they can't really be used if I am in a disassociate binge state.

Woo! To the GYM!

[ninminn]

So yesterday, I went to the Vitamin Shop and purchased Nomorbidity by AMBROSIA. Has anyone else ever tried this? Did you have good results? Please share your experiences.

[rainyfestivalsweets]

2/7/24 The Aftermath

Maybe venting got some shit out that I needed to release. I got 2 good workouts in today and 1 half assed step class.

Yes, I DID A 2 A DAY! OR 3 A DAY? WHATEVER! I DID IT.

Food has been good- primarily leftovers. I have a fridge stocked with ALL the veggies. But there was a storm coming so no matter what, I have no fucking excuses! And excuses don't burn calories OR fat. They just remind me that I suck at keeping promises to myself.

You gotta be about it. In a couple months, I could be in single digit jeans sizes.

Why? Why do you you want it?

If you really wanted it, wouldn't you be doing something about it??

Yeah, 💯 exactly. Time to get after it!

And a bowl of leftover veggies from last night's dinner.

Up next- baking soda & Epsom bath. A collagen tea. More of my book, then bed.

Things I need to remember:

Use all the tools in your toolbox.

Excuses are like wishes; they don't wash dishes.

I fucking got this. I root for everyone like there is no fucking tomorrow. I deserve to root for myself the same fucking way.

Get out of your own way.

You sexy bitch!

[rainyfestivalsweets]

New low! Dropped to 234.4 ~~~~

WOOOOOOOOO

I haven't been that for like....13 years.

Fuck yes. Yes yes yes. 🙌

[rainyfestivalsweets]

4/17/23

So far.... 24 oz water x 2, ACV shot, large cup of lemon water.

Woke up and mom was having an low oxygen episode.

I called in late to work and am sitting with her watching TV until she recovers.

The hardest part of caregiving is focusing on me while focusing on someone else is that I feel like someone always loses and someone always wins. It is hard to focus on 2 things at once.

Hard to deal with everything but I am trying. I tried to relax as much as I can this weekend. I spent time with people I love and care about. 💗

I was really stressed out last week and that makes it hard not to over consume food.

But I have my coach and we are working in things. Focusing on whole foods, drinking water, and working in daily habits for success. Walking daily, cardio as often as I can, and strength classes at least 2-3 x a week at work.

My coach reminded me that my mom would never want me to be harming myself because of her health.

And he is right. She wouldn't. She always wants the best for me. She lets me live here rent free and pays all the bills so I can catch up from my travesty of a marriage. She is supportive of me going to school and doing all the work things.

Working on creating better pathways for stress management.

Some meals:

[rainyfestivalsweets]

11/30/22 wt 247

What can I really say about last night? It went slightly south.

When the eating window opened, I ate all the things in a really short time. Total 700 cals of egg, meat stick, protein shake. That was dumb. Should have been half of that.

I had a cup of green tea with Cinnamon before the workout. It was weird. Lumpy. Need a milk frother for that, for sure. Not super palatable.

I got my minimum of exercise in--which is 20 minutes on the elliptical and 10 miles on the recumbent bike. I just wasn't into it.

I am still watching Prison Break, so I watched TV without exercising a little bit. I just wasn't into exercising. Doing the 10 miles was a little bit of a struggle. And that is ok. Not every day is going to be a gung ho exercise day.

I ended up snacking a little too much on things because I think I waited too long to eat. AND the food that I was planning to make had gone bad! 😪

I had a savory roasted butternut squash all planned out and when I opened the veggie bag it smelled funny. Ugg. Ok. Had to adjust meal plans.

Well, I was craving dessert at that point so I had 2/3 a tub of halotop, a fiber one bar, and light whipped cream. Then a cheeseburger patty (almost didn't eat this because of the calories. But realized I needed to eat protein because that might be causing the hunger management program). Then another fiber one bar. Then a can of no sugar added fruit cocktail.

I did eventually talk myself into meal prepping but God it was tough.

Once I was done cooking, I was tired. So I went to bed early. Which means I went downstairs shortly after 9 and was legit in bed by 10.

And slept later today. Idk wtf.

I didn't get up until 8 am. Yesterday and the day before were about 5 am.

I was super surprised that I weighed less today because I don't feel like I have been pooping as much as normal and generally feel kinda bloated. Despite the daily fiber tabs.

I need a hug.

What did I do right?

Water intake much higher

Green tea with Cinnamon

Waited until after noon for first meal (IF)

What did I do wrong?

Ran out of healthy pre-made meal

Did not have correct ingredients available

Was bored & frustrated

What can I do better today?

Continue trying to drink more water

Move nomorbidity to earlier in the day

Do better on meal & meal spacing

[rainyfestivalsweets]

11/22/22 wt 248.4

OK what do I want to say about yesterday.

I went to the fellowship dinner, it was good.

I wore an outfit I was not super comfortable with as it shows my shape.

I had invited lots of people to this thing, but no one showed up.

There was a wide variety of food (which I did not take a picture of)(social weird).

I visited with a couple of ladies that I might be becoming friends with now? 🫨 They really seemed awesome. Intelligent women!

My self evaluation is: mostly good WITH TWEAKS NEEDED FOR FUTURE.

I had one plate of the meal. Heavy on the protein, avoided the fried chicken, took the broccoli. Initially took 1 little mini cake.

The tweaks needed:

To quote Alan Roberts, I just need to quit eating so fucking much.

I was socially uncomfortable, and I think I kept going back for this or that to keep busy while I was visiting with new people.

Someone mentioned there was pecan pie, and I realized that I had missed the whole dessert table. I grabbed a piece of pie and 2 cookies.

And eventually went back for more little cakes.

So that is my note to myself. Have the pie, but next time, have a smaller slice. No cookies. No extra cakes. One and done, bitch.

Also, take the nomorbidity before dinner. Am thinking of actually moving it to earlier in the day.

Other note: stop MF shopping. No fucking more. Gawd. The debt you accrue is in fucking sane.

Posting a pic on here is terrifying to me, as I want to stay anonymous. But it is pushing outside my social comfort zone, which I am working on.

I had one where I edited out my face and a bunch of detrius in the background, but idk what happened. I clicked save, and it disappeared, like it just doesn't show up when I try to add pics. I did feel super hot. Even if people could see my shape and my giant insecurity of my giant belly. I think this shirt had a flattering fit, tho. So! wth, here is a closer pick of the top, too.

Yes, I mixed a print and a plaid. And I think this is my first time wearing those boots. I wore a white leather jacket and a teal crossbody purse.

Only 1 half hour workout yesterday, the fit class at work, low impact cardio. But I was a holy terror with cleaning, especially for such a busy day, which actually needed to be done. My legs are still tender from Saturdays workout, so I am not going to chide myself.

The Thesis blend of the day was: Confidence.

I remarked to my sister that I was confident I was getting shit done!

It was an incredibly good feeling to have energy and motivation to do *anything*

[rainyfestivalsweets]

1/16/23 wt 235

Mmk. I am regularly weighing 235-237.

Holy shit can I feel a difference in my body between this and 248-250.

I am continuing my workouts as normal, but added some from the Damn Collective. I am also trying to get outside (in the deep winter, I know!) to exercise more. Snowshoeing. Walking. Outside. Woo!

I did hire a weight loss coach. It has been such a long road and it was such a decent price I jumped on it.

It's the food. Food is the problem. Most food in the Standard American Diet is not healthy. It is engineered to be hyperpalatable... and then people like me struggle because we are always hungry or always craving certain things. It is because they engineered it that way.

I am hoping that I will be able to continue this weight loss journey without losing my effing mind!

He thinks he can get me to 176 in 6 months. That almost made me cry but I am game. Let's go! I haven't been under 226 in 20 years.

I am about to buy my first pairs of size 16 jeans today. For super cheap. I am going to have to go thru my closet and purge a bunch of stuff again. I am ready. I am doing the mental work.

Some of my leggings are fitting me way way loose. I am trying to keep wearing them as long as I can - especially the ones with pockets. When I replace them, all items will have pockets.

He thinks 176 is doable in 6 months!

[rainyfestivalsweets]

11/28/22

The Rest of the Day

Lunch - the veggie chili

Right after that- a cranberry Orange muffin. Ugg. That was unplanned. Not the worst but not planned either.

Ran to town to get my tire fixed. Again.

Had 2 cups of coffee and a giant cup of cold mango tea.

Grabbed a rotisserie chicken and went to my gf's house. Made a quick dinner.

She took some pics while I was feeding the dogs and they almost made me cry, I look so God awful.

I actually felt good today too.

I tell you what, what you see in pictures is not what I see in a mirror. 😭😭

I made myself a turmeric latte and a Moment.

[rainyfestivalsweets]

12/11/22

Treadmill time + 1 episode of Prison Break

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11/22/22

Quick update on the day.

Work workout done: Cardio, Strength, Core. 45 mins.

20+ Elliptical done.

Dog walk x 2.

Glucomannon taken.

Heading back to work.

Meal is ready to eat.

Snack- 16g skinny pop

[rainyfestivalsweets]

11/27/22

5k

Yes, this takes me alot longer than most folks.

But Wentworth and Dominic got me thru it.

3% incline for intensity.

Added small 5 lbs dumbells for additional arm resistance, every other min for the first 25 min or so.

I am not trying to run because of something Alan Roberts said critiquing a person of about the same weight as me.... that they shouldn't be trying to run 5k.

But I gotta burn calories somehow, right?

Prison break + treadmill time = Happy

[rainyfestivalsweets]

9/6/24

Still on phase 2 of hcg diet.

Not perfect, but progressing nonetheless.

Currently on Day 4, 2.4 pounds down for this round.

Walk/run with the dogs yesterday, about 1.5 miles. Needed the sunshine and figured the dogs could use the fresh air too.

But storytime--- afternoon:

I took 2 giant mugs of tea to my niece's cross country meet. I am trying to make sure I support her school functions too- not just the boys football. Just because our society deems women less valuable doesn't mean I should. *I* want her to grow up to know she is loved and valued beyond, so that when she comes of age and gets into relationships, she knows better than to settle for the stupid shit I have settled for. 2 apparent narcs. 1 great gf, but celibacy.

Anyway, I arrive just in time to see her cross the finish line like a freaking stud cupcake!!! Great timing. I visit with her and her momma a little bit and we prepare to leave.

My 2nd mug of tea is still too warm to drink so I left the lid off trying to get it to cool off a bit. I have a great idea and add some of the sf smores coffee syrup to it & hop into my vehicle.

I decide to drive to the bathrooms because I parked goofy and am having trouble getting out the other way. I start driving in this parking lot and SPILL THE MUG OF TEA ALL OVER MY LAP.

Fuck!! It burns!

I catch it, set it upright, look to find a parking spot and SPILL IT AGAIN.

Dammit.

I wanted that tea!!!

But also- it is HOT and now all over my lap AND my car. Shit shit shit and I have no towels or anything to wipe it up with.

The walk of shame to the bathrooms as I appear to have pissed myself. 😤 I checked for burns and was ok... but now discombobulated and very sticky. Now my car smells like a s'more.

The night got a little weird from there. I am in a weird headspace. I go to TJ Maxx because traffic is awful, and I wanted to pick up more ginseng.

I did a quick shop and got back to the car because I have to get back to work when I get home.

But! I forgot to take my Nomorbidity, which I normally take in the early afternoon, so I am hungrier than normal.

I had a burger salad with my meal prepped turkey and pork mix, and went back for more meat because I was still... hungry, hankering? Unsatisfied? Something.

I also had 2 hard candies, sf lemon from dollar tree, and 2 sf popsicles while mom and I watched unfrosted. And an orange, which is allowed.

So... while the day threw me for a loop, I did ok. And boom, today is my lightest weigh in.

I am working on keeping going, I am so close to my ultimate goals. Keep going keep going keep going!! 💪

[rainyfestivalsweets]

10/20/23 Things I did to help myself.... what did I have to change? Seems like everything some days.

Healthy Tips

Realistically evaluated my eating habits. It was either not enough or too much, no in-between. That was part of my problem.

Most restaurant meals are too much, even if you think you are ordering the 'healthy option'

It is not normal to gorge yourself on appetizers, drinks, & a giant entree. Choose a moderation mindset: Pick one or 2. Share an app. One drink. Pack half your entree 'to go'.

Our society is driven by consumerism. I had to take steps to stop that. Meet people to do activities, not to consume things.

Water- I shoot for 200 oz of water a day.

I take low cal beverages with me... nearly everywhere. Tea, coffee, sparkling water.

Try all kinds of different tea.

Meals focus on protein and produce. If you are still hungry- eat another portion of meat and produce.

Try to eat as unprocessed as possible. They add stuff to our food to make our brains light the F up. It isn't natural and devastating to people like me who are especially susceptible. Often when I have issues (yesterday!) It is because I had a processed item.

Sometimes I add a fiber supplement to my drink. Adds calories yes but I don't worry about it.

Try to only have 1 sweet thing a day. The later in the day, the better. I will actually be shooting for every 3 days or so.

Some of my craving issues were blood sugar related because I was pre-diabetic and had PCOS- which has an insulin problem.

If you haven't eaten, plan and eat a healthy meal that has a substantial amount of protein.

If you have eaten already, try to distract yourself with a task. If you are still truly hungry 20 minutes later- have another bit of protein & veggies.

Walk daily. But don't count it as your cardio.

If you work at a desk, get a standing desk and try to work up to standing daily.

Cardio 3x a week. Whatever you enjoy. Yes, you have to enjoy it. If you don't, you haven't found your activity yet.

Weight training 3x a week. Lift all the weights you can, as often as you can manage. You are now in training. For life!

Supplements- figure out what works for you. I am currently on: Sam-E, NAC, Nomorbidity, Alkemi, allergy stuff, and some other stuff I rotate in.

Read books that help your mindset. Atomic habits, mindset books. 10 mins a day, make it a habit to improve yourself.

Watch YouTube videos that build your motivation and determination.

Things can get better. I also utilize therapy! There is no shame in needing help!

I am becoming a healthier person and every choice reflects that.

[rainyfestivalsweets]

Well, one of my friends started a new business.

Which is annoying to me because she sent me a message asking about my goals and shit- acting like we haven't been talking nearly every day for years.

She knows what I have been doing (or I thought).

She knows that I regularly review my diet and regularly exercise.

She sent me a template message and when I said I was already on something, she asked me to post a tester message on the Facebook.

I did it. OK, whatever...but she wouldn't tell me even what fucking company it was. Are you fucking kidding me? 😒

So a friend signed up for her program and messaged me. So I asked what company it was.

But why the fucking cloak and dagger. We are actual friends. Starting a fricking business and hitting me up without telling me what the actual business is? Come on!

Apparently this pissed myself off to the 9th level. She should know that I am with a coach, and doing the damn thing every day. Ugg.

Apparently on of the things is skinny coffee:

$55 for 15 servings, I think.

In comparison to the slim coffee I previously reviewed:

Which was...$35 or $39 for 30:

So...

Idk if ya'll run across stuff like this.

Weirdly enough, I probably would have bought a package if she hadn't been so fucking weird about it because as you know, I am trying alot of weird shit. I was extremely heavy for a long fucking time. And if a weight chart says I am supposed to weigh 120.... good God. I am still 80 pounds away from that, AFTER 120 pound loss.

I am already on something that is helping me, it is called Nomorbidity from The Ambrosia Collective. I also started Alkemi from them back in October.

I have also been taking something called Slim from TS transformations.

If you are interested in either of those, just use Google and order them.

What is the point of this?

Oh yeah, I am super fucking annoyed that a person who got weight loss surgery hit me up like a fucking acquaintance; pretending like we haven't been heavily involved in each other's lives.

If you start a business, don't do this. Your friends deserve better.

I am probably going to fall down an anti-MLM series of posts now.