#me: remembers scenes are this dark
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You have synesthesia?? How does that work for you? Is this how you manage to use the word “meat” in a way that makes me go “holy shit that’s good and cool i need to read that sentence four more times” instead of “ew”?????
I do!!! Letters, numbers, and words all have colours and sometimes visual textures for me-- and while numbers and letters on their own are generally only a single colour (7 is a bright, grassy green!!! while "K" is a pale peachy pink, for example :] ), when i put them into words they often take on entirely new colours, some of which even bleed into each other like watercolour paints. Ironically, its why i use the UK spelling of "colour" in the first place-- the "u" turns what looks like a dull, desaturated blue into a smeared blue-and-purple that i find really pretty to look at :]] so when i say i like to paint with words, i kinda mean that literally 😂😂😂😂😂
But yeah, i'd imagine thats why my writing is Like That™ to some degree-- a lot of what im doing behind the scenes involves matching the colours and visual textures of a given word with all of the others in order to evoke a particular vibe or image in my writing. There are a lot of layers to how i write, but this is probably the one that takes both the most time AND is the one i happen to talk about the least WKDJWKSJEJ
#shouting speaks#asks#discovered the word ''halation'' yesterday as well which is a dark burnt orange at the beginning of the word that bleeds into periwinkle#on the back end#which was like. perfect for what i wanted in the scene#since a lot of the words AROUND it are various shades of browns oranges reds and creams#i think the colours i see the most of are purples greens and oranges tbh. p much every word with a Q and U in it has a shot of purple#if not taken over by it entirely#for those curious A is blue B is red C is a darker green#i made a chart once with hex codes to show what i see to other ppl but i have ZERO clue where it is now#the other funny thing ive noticed is that when numbers combine their individual colours stay the same#they dont blend like letters in words do#75 is green and magenta respectively the same way 7 and 5 are#36 is yellow and orange same as 3 and 6 when separated#its funny but helps me remember stuff quick im like REALLY good at remembering like. card numbers and license plates bc of it#txt
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you know what one really underrated but heartbreaking scene in tda is? that scene in lady midnight after mark comes back, when he lets the kids eat whatever they want for breakfast and makes a mess of the kitchen. everyone’s having fun but then julian comes and sees it and kind of just malfunctions and breaks down.
because julian can never be the fun one. he can never be the one who lets them eat syrup for breakfast, he’s too busy making sure they have actual food to eat for each meal of the day. julian can’t make a mess everywhere and leave it to clean later, he’s too busy running the institute and making sure the kids keep up with their studies and have clothes to wear and are as put together as they can be.
julian never gets to be the fun older brother, because he’s the parent. julian doesn’t get to take things lightly because he’s too busy holding everyone up. julian is serious because he stopped being a child when he lost his last parent aged twelve. julian is serious because the only person in the world he can open up to and share some of his burden with is the one person he can’t have without losing everything. cristina sums it up when she says to mark: he is envious because he loves them but cannot be their brother. he must be their father. in his mind, they dread him and adore you.
julian could never be the fun older brother. because he was too busy being the only parent the blackthorn siblings had left.
#tda-era julian blackthorn you will always have such a hold on me#i remember reading this scene for the first time and it BROKE me because mark is so lovable but you know all julian can think is#how he can't have that same kind of fun-brotherly relationship with them because he takes the role of the parent#julian blackthorn#mark blackthorn#the dark artifices#lady midnight#the shadowhunter chronicles
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❝I'm hungry. Can I eat too?❞
KHAOTUNG THANAWAT as RAY PAKORN episode 3 of ONLY FRIENDS
#only friends#only friends the series#ofts#sandray#firstkhao#khaotung thanawat#firstkhaotung#gmmtv series#gmmtv bl#thai bl#mlm#thkedit#th: the heart killers#bibi gifs#userrlana#tusermona#tuserhidden#tuserrowan#thank you juls for helping me pick a beautiful khaotung thanawat scene for this one#and how i told her i need him to look ethereal and juls straight up said then it has to be ray#funny how we pick the depressed and alcoholic as khaotung's ethereal character#but honestly how can you not? look at him!#also i didn't remember how dark some scenes of only friends were#like this one looked so dark#anyway#glossy lips recently fucked and asking for more ray bc i was in the mood for it
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soliloquy
(edit once again i drew something with my ipad screen brightness too high and now that i've posted it nothing is visible. sad!)
#orv#omniscient reader's viewpoint#kim dokja#art i made#sort of a quick lighting study i suppose??????#can't really explain this one i just keep thinking about#i dont remember if i ever talked about it on here but for my theatre studies performance project last semester i set up the lights so like#for one scene me and my groupmate would have 2 spotlights on us and after his character dies his light goes out and then its just#me with the spotlight and i didnt realise how fucking dark the lecture theatre would be with no lights on and i swear to god#for like those 3 minutes it really felt like nothing else existed in the world except me and that spotlight#genuinely one of the most haunting emotional experiences i ever had. idk i think about it a lot#there was an old post i saw a while back about how theatre is the best medium for portraying loneliness and its like. i watched a recording#of the tempest a few years back and that last scene of prospero alone on stage addressing the audience? yeah#anyway. time for somethig more respectable (mizisua angst) (?????)
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1x03 // 2x05
#wildcardsedit#wild cards#wild cards spoilers#max x ellis#max mitchell#cole ellis#vanessa morgan#giacomo gianniotti#meus#wildcardscentral#i'm not surprised that he remembered but i'm definitely surprised that i did#also the first scene stressed me out so bad why is it so ugly and hard to color??#fuck this ellis is staying in the dark i don't care#i don't think this is showing up in tags 💀 thanks tumblr
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Jonathan Crane, also known as: Creator of the World's Worst Exposure Therapy.
#this would be his title on a dating show#truly the man could change lives#too bad he likes ruining them instead#it reminds me of a crime show#i can't remember the name#where a therapist would try 'exposure therapy' with his patients#and then kill them under those pretenses#the scene of him tricking a man who couldn't swim#into drowning in a lake#kind of haunts me#but it also feels like something jon would do#shit can get dark#hi i'm rambling in the tags again#jonathan crane#scarecrow
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i miss you tomorrow today
#im on a haitus but decided to post this#art has been beyond hard for me lately#i cant bear to draw lately. but i was overcome with so much pain in the form of some kind of concept of unavoidable loss#which ambushes me sometimes. and i almost cried in the dining room over it#late in a dark winter i had fast food for the first time in years when my dad came home from hospital testing#with my birthday coming up it just feels so hopelessly#such a perfect scene to remember a decade from now#will i be thinking#'when you were here?'
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Finally got caught up with TADC and to no one’s surprise I’m now uncontrollably sobbing over the tragic doomed loving couple
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#OUGH… OUGH!!!!!#TEARING MY EYEBALLS OUR AND EATING MY TEARDUCTS!!!! SCREAMING AND CRYING AND THROWING UP!!!!#moots will know that this trope is my kryptonite. *stares at heromari collection*#genuinely though. the parallels between these two and heromari are crazy#like SO CRAZY even down to the minor details#like kinger’s wife (queener??? is that canon or fanon I have no clue)#liking bugs and him being afraid of them#but they’re less scary when she’s there. when she was there :((#OUGHH THEY BOTH TURN INTO SHADOWY EYE-FOCUSED TRAUMA DEMON THINGS TOO AGHHHHHH!!!!! AGHHHHHH!!!!!!!#yeah this episode killed me so much#they remind me SO deeply of heromari and anything that does that is guaranteed to make me cry#kinger’s fort being dark so he can try and remember his memories with his wife… AGHHHHHHHH#that scene in episode two where he started to remember things when he had the bucket over his head the FORWSHADOWING JSJDNSNSJZJ!!!! SHEIEJS#ANYWAY yeah I don’t think anyone’s surprised I like this show. and this couple. and these characters. and cried over them#I have so many thoughts about them and the other characters and the show and EVERYTHING but that will be for another post#for now!!!! I cry!!!!!#tadc#the amazing digital circus#tadc kinger#I would tag wife but I don’t know her name so. ough :(#it’s so sad it’s so tragic ough ough OUGH AGH AGAJEJEJSJSJH.#tadc spoilers#‘you look beautiful honey’ END ME RIGHT FUCKING NOW/j
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#bandom qoutes#emo band#emo bands#qoutes#2014#i miss 2014#2014 grunge#2k14 grunge#grunge#2k14#2k14 aesthetic#tumblr grunge#soft grunge#my chemical romance#mcr#2016#2017#ptv#pierce the veil#sleeping with sirens#asking alexandria#bmth#bring me the horizon#a day to remember#2014 nostalgia#nostalgia#emo#scene#dark grunge
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The way I cannot express how this scene makes me laugh each time. Haein tired 3 times but boi is so denseeeee. She even said 'Busman rode bus number 372 and is you'. How did he still not get it after this?! 😭 The way she starts by teasing him and he gets all worked up over it. Like boi PLEASE put 2 and 2 together 💀
I'm mentally living in Hyunwoo's laugh of sheer joy and arrogance followed by his disbelieving questions to Hae in;
'Was it really me? I'm your first love?'
The scene is even cuter when it cuts to them after the secretaries. 🥹🫶🏼
Gif credits: @jcpostsobsessions
#Even I wanted to smack him here#How did you even get into SNU?#same Haeina same#but what a joyful and beautiful scene#like this is what we signed up for?!#ugh I love it sm!#The light to his darkness indeed#I also love how this specific part of reasons of my smile plays at just the right time#queen of tears#hong hae in#baek hyun woo#thank you kim ji won and kim soo hyun for this scene#rewatch#picking the episodes apart#highlight what makes me happy and what i want to remember
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[chemistry] it's not a word that actors [use]. but you must endeavor a little bit to try and fall in love, in whatever that capacity is. and andrew is a very easy person to fall in love with. he's kind, generous, talented. we shot the film at the perfect junction in our friendship where there was a lot we didn't know about each other, but there was mutual admiration and respect. and a similar sense of humor. (...) yeah, it felt fizzy when we were acting. especially with that first scene at the door -- it's so well-written. you feel like you're dancing through the scene, you can go in loads of different ways, and if i went one way, andrew would go another. if that's what chemistry is, i was aware it was happening.
-- paul on chemistry and whether ‘they (andrew & paul) knew instantly that their onscreen relationship was working’ in all of us strangers, screendaily.com (1/31/24)
#i just find this whole acting thing & the process actors have to go through very fascinating. how so many of them have said that your --#mind knows that it's not real; it's make-believe but your body doesn't & it gets blurred & your body gets tricked into thinking it's --#actually experiencing all of that. no wonder sometimes actors need to take some time to recover from/get over a specific role they played.#i just recently saw claire foy talk about this & how 'you're falling in love with a person you're not in love with.' and there's a --#psychological thing happening where you can either suspend belief or you can make real what's happening. and that it can get very confusing#& how when she was watching this movie her body would react -- tears & heart palpitations -- but not because of what she saw on screen --#but because she (her body) was remembering it. it's wild & i don't think i'd ever be able to do it.#reminds me of what jessica chastain said about 'scenes from a marriage' & how her & oscar's years long friendship was changed after that#idk how these people do it; honestly; especially those actors who play really dark characters & put themselves in their minds (evan peters)#paul mescal#andrew scott#all of us strangers
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Kit: confessing his love to Ty while he is ressuracting his dead twin
Me: Ahhhh our boy takes from his infamous ancestor Will Herondale who had VERY bad timing and confessed his love at the worst possible time in the world
#kit kinda beats him though#even though it wasn't a mistake on anyone's part really#it was just very bad timing#like will who if he'd told tess just a few hours earlier how he felt he would have avoided the engagement or something#not that that would have been particularly good for the plot but...#the shadowhunter chronicles#tsc#tda#the dark artifices#the infernal devices#kit herondale#kit rook#will herondale#william Herondale#i can't really remember but i think the scene where will told tessa made me cry a bit
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I can't even look at the normal ahsoka scenes now because what do you MEAN they’re not actually purple
#me rewatching star wars: 'wait i dont remember it looking like this'#every time i'm surprised at how dark the scenes actually are
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I'm sorry, but Eddie was shot in broad daylight and thought, "this is it, this is the last moment of my life," and he reached for Buck. He thought he was dying, and all he could do was look at Buck and reach.
#buddie#eddie diaz#evan buckley#911 abc#oh sniper scene you will always be famous#the slow mo#the blood splatter on buck#the silence as they stare at each other before eddie collapses#the way captain mehta has to tackle buck because all he can do is watch as eddie is bleeding out in front of him#the way eddies eyes find bucks again and eddie fucking REACHES#buck crawling under the firetruck to save him#the way bucks yelling at eddie the whole time letting him know hes coming#the GRAB#dragging eddie under the truck and throwing him over his shoulder to lift him into the truck#bucks just stay with me and i need you to hang on#eddie asking if bucks hurt and only passing out after buck says no#and the buck and chris scene!!!#and the will reveal!!!#survivors you will always be famous#i will forever believe the shooting was eddies oh moment#i remember falling#and everything got dark#and i thought#this is it#this is the last moment of my life#and i reached for you#if i was going to die#i wanted to be able to touch you one last time#we really could have had it all if fox werent cowards
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that moment when saga fights against the darkness in her mind place and opens the door to leave and it starts to pan out—showing nothing but stars just like the Night Springs intro before she appears in the dark place’s new york. Traversing the void in between worlds just like her dad. cinema!!
#it’s also creepy. the implication that the dark place is either this other world/entity or something between worlds#it’s huge and nothing but (possibly) was shaped through contact by Zane/alan/artists#I can’t remember exactly the words but that one manuscript with Alan’s scratched out edits#where he called Cauldron lake a black mirror#that just by looking at it you’d know it was ‘too late’#the mountain being the site of a caldera. as casey says the opening to hell#anyways it’s very existential and terrifying#alan wake 2#saga anderson#ahhhghghhhhgghh I can’t stop thinking about the ending of this game#saga being an Anderson and a Door. being a seer and maybe even having the ability to traverse worlds.#door being everywhere and in between. all at once. fascinating#I don’t even know if this is the takeaway for that scene. the resemblance to night springs just intrigues me esp since the door manuscript#shows up right after this
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Sonic au where everything's the same except the werehog was feral during unleashed. Nothing else abt the plot changes bc at his core sonic is still himself BUT he's more Creature. Bigger, fluffier, can't talk, overall more animal-isms. Yeah
#ramblings#i remember reading a fic a while ago on ao3 that was literally just this. basically snippets from unleashed but he's feral like this#idk if his design was ever described as different from canon tho. i'm pretty sure it wasn't#i don't use ao3 anymore and i don't remember what it's called so i'm not looking for it#i'm just imagining my own version of the same concept#i'm imagining the scene where he first meets chip. he kinda paws at him gently and growls#and when chip says 'don't eat me! i taste bad!' he gets confused and whines sadly thinking like i wasn't gonna do that...... :[#and the scene where tails almost gets attacked by a bunch of dark gaia monsters#after he beats them up he goes up to him and like sniffs him and looks over him making sure he's not hurt and whimpering#bc that's his best friend!! his little brother!!! he doesn't want him to be hurt!!!!#meanwhile tails is confused as hell. not realizing that's sonic at first until he hesitantly calls his name and sonic looks up at him#with wide eyes and perked up ears. and then it clicks like 'ohhhh it's you.. wait what the heck why do you look like that'#and sonic kinda shrugs and growls like idk man you tell me#later he asks if sonic can talk at all and he shakes his head and growls and kinda scratches at his throat#'oh is your throat sore? maybe some tea would help! not sure if i have any on hand though...'#cut to after they save professor pickle and they're at his lab talking abt the situation at hand or whatever#and sonic has a warm cup of tea in his paws and he's lapping it up not listening to what everyone else is saying bc mmm yummy :]#OH AND THE SCENE WHERE HE SAVES AMY FROM BEING HARRASSED BY PROFESSOR PICKLE'S POSSESSED ASSISTANT#him holding her close growling and hissing at everyone else for bothering her. that's his friend!!!! leave her alone!!!!!!#i should draw something for this actually. i wanna see the creature. big spiky dog hedgehog thing#i already love him#feral werehog au
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