#makes me sad if I think about it too hard lol

[penfz]

A Hard Lesson

SukunaXFemReader (Modern AU)

Summary: The Itadori's are faced with a heartbreaking question from Aika, and it's up to them to answer in the best and most truthful way possible.

A/N: Please always remember, you're good enough <3

Sukuna X FemReader Masterlist

Yuji stood there, Aika’s question catching her off guard. She was already in tears as she asked her question, a situation that she had created in her mind to be true. Cause it had to be true, right? Cause why else would things be the way they are?

“Yuji-“ Sukuna called as he headed to his brother’s room. He needed to know what the 2 brats wanted for dinner. But Aika’s cries made him pause at the doorway. Did Yuji make her cry? That’s kind of unlike him. “Suku- nii.” Yuji began to tear up. “I don’t know what to do.”

… wtf. Sukuna didn’t even know what was happening, why Aika was crying and why Yuji was about to cry himself.

He placed a hand on Yuji’s head, signaling that everything will be ok. And then picked up Aika, consoling the child as he did Yuji when they were younger.

“So?” Sukuna pressed. He didn’t need to say that one of them better explain why the fcuk they were crying. “Um, Aika had a question.” Yuji mentioned, a sadness seeping through his voice. “And I didn’t know how to answer.” His voice ended in a whisper. “What question?” Sukuna continued, now looking at Aika. But the poor girl didn’t want to answer, wiping her tears as she didn’t want to upset Sukuna.

“Aika.” Sukuna pressed once more. He wasn’t going to repeat his question, something Yuji already knew and Aika was starting to learn.

With one more sniffle, she asked the question that had broke the younger Itadori’s heart.

“Suki, does my dad not like me?” “Why are you asking that?” Sukuna’s expression turning flat, it wasn’t a question he wanted to answer. Cause screw him! LOL “Cause everyone else in my class has a dad, but not me.” “Did someone in class say that your dad doesn’t like you?” Sukuna questioned. And when Aika didn’t answer and simply looked down to the floor, he mentally promised her that whoever their parents were, will not be having a child anymore.

Which isn’t a nice thing to say, so he didn’t say it outloud Lol

“Don’t listen to them.” Was the poorest advice Sukuna could honestly say. But what else was he allowed to say? He barely knew the situation with you and your ex, only that he chose to not be in the picture anymore. And you were were fine with that. “Suku-nii.” Yuji whispered, as if reprimanding him. Yuji? The younger brother, reprimanding him? Ha!

Sukuna simply grimaced at Yuji. He understood that the advice he gave was simply terrible, especially for someone Aika’s age. But he didn’t want to overstep boundaries for Aika wasn’t his child, he didn’t want to overstep and make you upset.

But to Sukuna, there was something he wanted to say on the matter.

“It’s not that he doesn’t like you.” Sukuna started, catching Yuji by surprise when he continued. Aika simply sat there. “He just doesn’t deserve you.” “Deserve me?” Aika questioned. She didn’t really understand. Maybe he meant like how her mom would ask her if she deserved icecream after not finishing her homework. “Yeah.” Sukuna answered, how does he explain it in terms Aika would understand? “If you’re not good, then do you think you deserve rewards for it?” “No.” Aika answered, tears about to slip through. But she won’t cry in front of Sukuna, she refuses too! But she already did… “If your dad chooses not to see you, is that nice?” Sukuna continued. “No.” Aika sniffled, she was so close to crying again. “Then do you think your dad who chooses not to see you, deserves you?” “No.” Aika let her tears fall.

Aika was so confused in wanting to be a good daughter by loving both parents. But truthfully, because she didn’t see her dad, doesn’t truly know him, she wasn’t sure how she was supposed to love him. Was she supposed to give him the same love she gives Sukuna? Cause Gojo said it was ok to write her homework that one time on Father’s Day about Sukuna. He treated her nicely, helped her with her homework when Yuji or you couldn’t. Fed her all her favourite things and took her to her favourite places, all with Yuji by her side. Sukuna deserved her love, deserved her. Was she supposed to love her dad like how she loves Sukuna?

Maybe she should ask you or Gojo about that.

And truthfully. Sukuna loved Aika just as much as he loved Yuji, just as much as he would love his own child.

And perhaps the love that Aika kept for her dad, perhaps Sukuna deserved it more than her dad.

“Mommy!” Aika suddenly screamed, her tears getting harder as she screamed for you.

Yuji and Sukuna jumped, this was so unexpected. The Itadori brothers thought that Sukuna’s little speech was good, surprisingly.

And it was good. Aika was only now confused on who deserved her love, on who deserved her. She needed to ask you, to Aika you had all the answers, you’re her mom after all.

But where were you during this little crisis?

Stuck outside the front door waiting for one of the brothers to answer the door, that’s where.

It didn’t even dawn on any of them that you’re probably close by until Yuji’s phone started ringing.

“Hello?” Yuji answered carefully, Aika was still crying. “Hey Yuji, I’m outside… is Aika crying?” You questioned as you could hear her in the background.

Yuji froze for a moment, would you be mad knowing your daughter was crying?

“Yeah…” Yuji answered slowly. “I’ll come open the door.”

And with that, Yuji quickly exited the room, leaving Sukuna with a crying Aika.

“Hey…” Yuji said carefully, opening the door. He wasn’t sure how you would react to news of your daughter crying. “Hi Yuji.” You answered… pretty cheerfully too. Wtf? Did she not just hear her daughter crying? “So where’s Aika?” “With Suku- nii upstairs in my room.” Yuji admitted. “I’m sorry Y/N-“ “For what?” You asked confused? “Did you make Aika cry?” “No, but-“ “And I doubt Sukuna did too.” You answered with a small smile. “It’s fine Yuji, just tell me what happened.”

So Yuji began to explain how Aika’s sudden question had stumped him, and how Sukuna tried his very best to comfort her. But in the end, his words didn’t seem to affect her.

“Is that all?” You questioned, that gentle smile never leaving your face. “Yeah.” Yuji answered, he was relieved he wasn’t in trouble. But he still felt bad for Aika crying. “And between me and you.” You said just before heading upstairs to Yuji’s room, making Yuji look up at you. “Aika’s father is a real piece of work. The reason she doesn’t see him is actually his own fault, he chose that. So Sukuna’s right when he said that he doesn’t deserve Aika.”

With that, Yuji’s big smile returned to his face, realizing you agreed with his big brother.

You gently knocked on Yuji’s door, even though it was wide open. Sukuna and Aika immediately made eye contact with you, causing Aika to crawl out of Sukuna’s grasp to get to you.

You scooped Aika into your arms, and into a big hug. Her tears were now dry, but her eyes red and puffy. And there sat Sukuna, still on Yuji’s bed, taking in the scene before him.

“Aww my sweet pea, you were crying.” You cooed at your daughter, Aika burying her face into your neck and shoulder. “Did Suki make you feel better though?”

And you felt a gentle nod against your neck, making you smile.

“He did? Suki is always so good to you darling, isn’t he.” You continued, a gentle smile on your face as you hugged Aika. Sukuna couldn’t help the way his heart beat in his chest, and his cheeks turn pink. Wtf, why do you always make him feel this way?! All cause you acknowledged his actions towards your daughter.

“You know, there’s someone downstairs who also probably feels sad, cause you were sad.” You mentioned, causing Aika to lift her head. “Yuji is also sad, because you were sad. Why don’t you go make him feel better like how Suki did.”

Instantly, Aika was wiggling her way out of your arms, holding back her tears once again. As she made it her goal to make sure Yuji was ok. And off she was running down the stairs.

“Don’t run brat!” Sukuna yelled.

And there Aika was, now walking down the stairs cause she got yelled at.

You laughed.

“I heard what you said to her.” You confirmed to Sukuna’s dread. Of course Yuji most likely told you when you were let in. You’re probably going to tease him about being a softie. As if you don’t already know. “It’s whatever. Brat was crying about some deadbeat.” Sukuna answered back, that gruff tone reappearing. “Yeah he is a deadbeat.” You laughed. “She has you and Yuji though.”

Sukuna could no longer hear it, the sadness in your voice whenever you spoke about Aika not having a relationship with her father. It was like it never existed. Instead your tone, your words, they were grateful. They were kind. They were loving.

“Be nice if she had a sibling though.” You casually mentioned, a smirk on your face as you eyed Sukuna.

Sukuna almost choked on air.

“Don’t fcukin’ temp me brat.” Sukuna answered back, walking out of Yuji’s room. You closely following behind, laughing out loud.

Cause how would he know, how serious you were about that.

Extra:

“You don’t deserve to cry Yuyu cause I was crying.” A small but serious tone said.

You and Sukuna only looked at each other before peeking around the corner to the living room. There was Yuji gently smiling at Aika, who stood before him, holding his hand in such a serious way.

Wtf is going on…? And why did she say it that way?

“I’m sorry Yuyu, for making you cry. But you don’t deserve to cry.” Aika continued.

Yuuji was trying not to laugh, Aika was getting her words wrong. And figured out that Aika was probably copying Sukuna’s kind words.

“Don’t worry Aika, I’m ok.” Yuuji grinned. “Want to watch that new movie you asked about? I found it streaming.”

“Yeah!” Aika was excited.

You laughed at the change of Aika’s mood and words.

“Almost seems like she was mocking you Suki.” You teased, to which Sukuna groaned. He swears, this family doesn’t take him seriously!

[shaykai]

He’s not taking the whole “being murdered” thing very well :/

[shouyuus]

Imagine Vi when she gets jealous… 🤭

I’ve seen this theory on tiktok saying that Caitlyn would be the jealous type, and Vi would be the more laid back one. But idk…

Caitlyn grew up as an only child, so she was used to getting everything she wanted, and never had to share. But with Vi, she had a sibling and other people to take care of. So she’s used to sharing everything.

But imagine if her s/o were to make her jealous on purpose. I do not think she would take it too lightly 👀

Idk, what do you think?

mmMMmmm yes good for sure let's talk about it; slight to medium angst ahead (w/ slight suggestiveness at the end), don't say i didn't warn you now !!

bc i think vi would be jealous, but i think it'd be different than cait's specific brand of jealousy, right. bc i think the thing on tiktoks not wrong like, cait's always had stuff belong to her, and vi's always had to share, but like i don't think it's the sharing aspect that would get to vi, it would be like her being deeply afraid that you might leave her (haha i love PAIN). because her whole life, all she's known is loss, and her biggest fear is change, right? but like... you lose people enough times and it's hard to stop from wondering if it's you and not them :( and her insecurities would be that someone else is making you feel xyz, and not her instead

like if someone else were to buy you a drink at a bar, or tell you a joke and make you laugh, she'd get SO jealous that she's not the one doing it, or that you're not smiling at her like that, and she'd wonder if you liked that person better than her. and to a certain degree, i do think that like it would come off in the same way, like jealous gf is do be jealous. but the root of it would be different.

and no, i don't think she'd take it lightly at all if her s/o were doing it on purpose.

she'd make short work of whoever the fuck is with you, either slip an arm around your waist or just tap them on the shoulder and --

"sorry, you're just in the way of me and my girlfriend here --"

and i think it'd manifest at first as anger. bc that's how a lot of vi's feelings manifest LOL and she'd be mad and yank you behind her, pull you somewhere private, be like --

"what was that?"

"what was..." you frown, concern flashing in your eyes as you look over her face. and her expression is so tight, so guarded. it's been so long since you've seen her like this. "vi...? you know that... i wasn't serious about that... right?"

she scoffs, "yeah? seemed like you were having a pretty good time --"

"i -- i was just trying to get us some free drinks! a-and..." you chew on your lips, looking away, "i -- i thought it'd be hot to... i dunno... make you jealous..."

vi sighs, her breath thready as she runs her hands through her hair.

"god, dollface..." she sounds exhausted and wired all at once, and you can't help feeling a sharp spate of guilt twist in your gut.

"vi... i'm so sorry -- i didn't mean --"

she lets out a shaky breath, reaching forward to cup your face with both her hands, her eyes overbright and desperate.

"just... don't -- i'm --"

you curl your fingers around hers, press your cheek into the warmth of her palms.

"i'm not... i'd never leave you, vi..."

she leans forward at your words, presses her forehead against you. a soft, helpless chuckle echoes from her chest to yours.

"yeah? gonna be mine forever, cupcake?"

you laugh, nodding, even as she tugs you forward to graze your lips along hers.

"yeah -- i'm always gonna be yours, vi."

she hums against your lips, her hands trailing down to your neck, pulling you close, and then closer.

"good," she breathes, her voice dipping low as a summer sunset, and nearly just as hot, "now say it again --" she drops her lips to your neck, biting a line down the column of your throat.

you gasp, head tipping back.

"a-always... gonna be y-yours, violet --"

"mm -- again --"

"f-fuck vi -- i'm -- yours -- n-ngh!" she'd look up at you from where she's dropped to her knees in front of you, watching you with those big, baby blue eyes of hers.

she'd flash you a tiny smile that tells you you're forgiven, if only a bit, but the way she nips at your skin just a bit harder than usual and jerks down your pants tells you that she's still feeling vindictive and that you're really, really in for it tonight.

"again," she says, her voice hoarse.

"'m yours, violet -- hah... please..."

your head tips back as her fingers dig into the plush of your thighs and forces them apart.

"again."

[tarteggs]

vash the stampede…lazy in space?

[dromaeo-sauridae]

I haven't got a penny haven't got a dime

But I know how to have a good old time

I ain't got a dollar baby when I do

Gonna go and spend it all on you

(reblogs>likes!)

[sysig]

Wuh oh (Patreon)

Bonus:

The novel experience of being crushed by a giant rock, a visual metaphor

[art--harridan]

[Image description: A traditional drawing of Katrina from the film Vamp. It is boldly coloured with oil pastels, and is a close-up of her face, stretched out to bare her fangs. Both her mouth and her eyes are wide open, although one of her eyes is obscured in a dark shadow. She is deeply shadowed, although the contours of her face are lit up from below in a bright and unnatural neon green, which also makes her visible eye look uncanny. There is a pink rim light around the top of her head, and deeper reds behind her. The oil pastels create a grainy texture that is offset by the rigidity of the colour blocking of the different tones of her face.]

[puppppppppy]

people who do STEM or administration as a career full time and continue to do art as a hobby, I am scared of you but like in a hot way. youre like if we were allowed to have cold drinks in winter. i look at you and think of miles morales with his two cakes. do you want to make out sometime

[trashlie]

ILY FP 258

I can't believe we're actually passed episode 250 lmao I Love Yoo is truly the never ending story (affectionate). I appreciate how much of the story we really get to dig into at this pace and while I know a lot of people have long-since dropped it, I imagine the rest of us (those reading this post because why else are you here?) also appreciate it. And that's what is even more refreshing about this episode - if refreshing is even a word we can use to describe it. Getting the extra scenes from other characters, a look at their lives and from these glimpses, what we can glean in the unsaid between the lines.

Can you believe I used to prey on Kousuke's downfall? There's so many posts of me talking about him from a different view, believing that the only way he could grow and develop and make the changes necessary to make him a better person was for him to crash and burn, to fail so significantly that he would be forced to pen his eyes to reality. But here we are, me, fervently swaddling him up like a baby and shoving him into my pocket because GOD he needs to be protected.

I don't even remember when it was, that my view on him began to shift, when I went from "he's interesting but awful" to "GOD THIS IS MY SON AND I WILL FIGHT EVERYONE YOU HAVE TO GO THROUGH ME" but.... lol there's no going back!

That's enough rambling, let's jump in.

There is something so painfully devastating about every time ILY confirms to us something we have long-since known or suspected through nuance, foreshadowing, reading between the lines, etc: That Kousuke isn't Rand's biological son, that Shinae was at the formal for Gun Kim, that Kousuke has been manipulated his whole life. Nothing in this episode regarding Kousuke is actually new to us. We have known, and talked about, for months and months long before the confirmation reveal that Yui drugs Kousuke - that he has been manipulated by her his entire life, that she orchestrated his life to manipulate him into situations she could take advantage of. It's the way she spoke about Rand's affair around Kousuke, the way she commodified Rand's love so Kousuke became convinced he'd never earned his father's love, the way she spoke of their family vs others and convinced him from such a young age that everyone was out to get them, to destroy them, and that he couldn't let them get close, couldn't let them near - and how Nol was very much a target planted in his mind.

But it's the fact that he is speaking of this and acknowledging it! Until now, Kousuke has heavily lived in denial. Again, we know this. We talk a lot about the chasm between reality and the reality he believes in. We talk a lot about how Kousuke couldn't face reality, even though on some level he knew everything he believed and was told was not quite true not quite real, but that he was so afraid of the truth, he couldn't do it. Kousuke admitting that he's been driven by fear and envy explains everything about him, and why he could not accept the only unwavering unconditional love he was offered.

A few weeks ago I saw a video on instagram of this father talking about a conversation he had with his daughter, who was feeling a little uncomfortable with her friend group. A new girl started to play with her and her best friend and she said she wasn't exactly jealous, but that maybe it was that she was afraid that there wasn't enough love to go around. Her dad had to explain to her that love is not like a pizza - it's not finite, a limited amount that could be taken and hogged by someone else. But Kousuke never learned this. His father's love was commodified and he was made to fear this other kid who he mistakenly believed knew a version of his father he'd never been privy to. He never learned that love is finite, that Rand could have enough love for the both of them, and feared that Nol would hog it all - that he WAS hogging it all because whether or not it was good or bad, Nol received more attention that Kousuke did. And that speaks VOLUMES about how Kousuke sees Rand, what he thinks of their relationship. In his mind, he is still unworthy, that he's not noteworthy enough.

This part gets to me so badly. We, as omniscient readers, know that Rand has tried his best, but that Yui runs a spectacular interference with which he can't compete, largely because of the roles their family have placed them in - Rand the busy businessman, Yui the mommy homemaker. But no matter how hard he tries, it isn't good enough. Rand tries to reach Kousuke, but the manipulation and paranoia are so far gone that the times Rand does have the chance to convey his feelings, Kousuke can't even believe it, because he thinks he's not good enough to deserve that love, that he hasn't fully qualified for it yet. And despite that, Nol, who Kousuke feels hasn't done half of what he has to deserve Rand's love, gets the attention. It doesn't matter that it's negative attention, that Rand barks at Nol, that Nol feels Rand hates and regrets him, because ultimately, it's still more than Kousuke receives. And worse, to him, every time Rand is busy reprimanding Nol, he turns away from Kousuke to do it.

I want to make it clear that this is a deep trauma point of Kousuke's. He's never learned healthy love and the only person who gave him healthy love was someone he was set to fear and fight. Something I think about a lot is the flashback to Kousuke, in the bushes, watching Nessa and Nol's display of warm affection, before Yui appears literally looming before him. In that moment, he witnesses something he's been deprived of. "We're not like other families"'. He's told from a young age he shouldn't compare himself to those healthy families, to warm and affectionate relationships that he will not cultivate in this household. From such a young age it is normalized, that they aren't like others, that they are cold and distant. From a young age, he's made to stuff down his feelings, his tender wants and desires, in order to earn them. To be a good little boy who makes his parents proud. To make his father look his way.

There's also something about the way he says "I've been a good boy" that echoes Shinae learning she's been manipulated by Yui, devastated and angry and yelling about how she's been a good girl so why do these things keep happening to her, all she wanted to do was help her dad. Two people who, from a young age, felt they had to be so obedient, so good, to not be a burden, and despite following the rules, despite doing as they were told, despite trying to be whatever version of "good" they believed in, the world still beat them up and mistreated them. The world still punished them.

As Rin in our discord server pointed out, though, to some degree, Kousuke is very much a person who can - and does - act out, when he's emotionally high-strung. He's a volatile man, and it's largely to do with the fact that he's been drugged to placate him for so long. He never learned emotional regulation, he never learned how to deal with high-stress situations or to face conflict or to own up to things. This is something that some readers who hate Kousuke and expect him to act a certain way because of his age are missing. You don't just learn these things with age. You learn them with experience and Kousuke was deprived of the opportunity TO have those experiences. He never had to learn these behaviors, and now as an adult he cannot function when overwhelmed.

Idk this whole episode is just heartbreaking. It's devastating. I remember when I was someone praying on Kousuke's downfall and now I want to take it all back ;___; I always believed he had to crash and burn to be able to see the world for what it really was and to face his fears, but this is somehow so much worse.

And even though he's drunk, I don't think he's going to forget all of this in the morning. Rather, I think what he's voicing are things that have been plaguing him since waking up in the hospital. From that moment, we saw him wary and distrustful of his mother, we saw his concern for Nol rising above everything else, but grappling with the understanding that he doesn't deserve to stand in front of Nol anymore. These aren't epiphanies coming to him just because he's drunk; it's more like he's only voicing them because he's drunk. But even when he sobers up, he will probably still be haunted by these fears, these agonies, these truths, this understanding.

How does he face his mother after this? How does he face anyone? He may not even feel like he can trust Jayce - who while very kind to him, is still employed by his family. He may not even feel like he can trust Hansuke (though I really hope that's not the case).

He's so miserable and it genuinely hurts to have him lay it all out for us - everything we've known and suspected, like how it was so painfully clear he WANTED Nol's friendship, their brotherhood, but feared it, didn't believe that there was enough love to go around, that there could only be one of them and that even if it was for good or bad reasons, Nol cast him in the shadow. And all these years, watching as Nol, as Yeonggi, grew into this person who sounded so very much like this unknown version of their father, someone funny who makes others laugh, someone goofy, someone so boyish in the ways Kousuke was never allowed to be. Watching as he gathers friends, while Kousuke, so unlikeable, is wanted only for his money, for his status, for the clout.

He doesn't even know WHO HE IS! Questioning his own traits he's believed of himself, wondering if this is even him, if these parts of him are real or does he just act it, say it, pretend it, while trying to fulfill a role he was shoved into. That makes me feel SO deeply sad, because it's something I've been anticipating for so long: Kousuke wondering WHO he really is, how much of him is real and how much of it is the result of manipulation.

And that moment that he catches himself and says no no that's offensive and rude you can't be like that. ;AAA;

For him to admit how much he envies others, how much he craves the kind of connection others have, the kind of family others have, to feel that love and warmth that he's been deprived of, forced to endure this solitude because, as he believes, he didn't get the good parts of Rand. And what will happen when he learns that Rand isn't his father? That he never stood a chance to inherit any of those traits. Kousuke has operated on this belief that, if he tries hard enough, he can earn the things he craves, but I fear learning about his parenthood will make him think that no matter how hard he tried, he would never earn that, because none of it was ever him, could have gone to him.

I think this is where Shinae, in the future, will come in. I feel so very strongly that she will be someone who helps Kousuke to see that this isn't true, that these kinds of personality traits aren't something inherited, but rather something learned. For him to one day realize it's the paralyzing fear that holds him back, not his genetics. Of course, I acknowledge this will still take a lot of therapy but...

Something else very remarkable to me is the way Kousuke recognizes Shinae in Shinhye, because their eyes "feel the same" and he opens up to her - on some level, whether or not he is consciously aware of it, Kousuke knows, or maybe just wants to, that he can trust Shinae. That she is someone who is safe. He even knows how she feels about his mother. I don't think we'll see a lot of Kousuke and Shinae's friendship until we're passed our timeskips, but it makes me feel a little hopeful about it, that she'll be able to reach him, because she feels like someone who is safe. It's the way he sees Nol in her and wants to try to have that do over, a relationship with someone who  has unconditional love for him. It's the way he knows he mistreated Nol, that it was wrong, that he took it all out on this kid he was so afraid of because he had no other outlet, and he wants to do better but knows that there's nothing to salvage anymore.

But also, it just makes me hope more and more that in the future we WILL see a reconciliation between the brothers. As I say every time, it doesn't mean they have to become brothers or friends, but I just want them to see each other fully. Kousuke knows what he did to Nol. He doesn't deny it, even if he might not say it out loud unless he's drunk. But Nol is still so in the dark. Yujing is trying to tip him off and make him aware of it, but I hope one day when Nol realizes it, when he finds out that Kousuke, too, was Yui's victim, that he wasn't the only one, that Kousuke was made to fear Nol's love, he might.... understand. I'm saying understand here loosely because I don't want people to get the idea that I mean Nol will forgive him and Kousuke will be justified, but rather that Nol would be able to understand why Kousuke felt that way, and move on. But I can't help but hope that it will lead to an understanding, a reconciliation, where maybe they can try to be in each other's lives.

I think it's also interesting that Shinhye was somewhat honest, even if she wasn't very forthcoming, with Kousuke about her own family. It sounds like her mother has been gone for a long time, that she's been on her own the whole while, and I think it reinforces the idea that she believes both that Simhan is her father and that he rejected her, that he didn't want anything to do with her. It lines up, too, with how she feels that he wouldn't react well if he saw her (although I think she credited that to looking like their mother). In the same way that Shinae has felt abandoned and cast aside by their mother, Shinhye probably thinks their father never tried reach out, to find them, to maintain a relationship with her. Or perhaps it's that her mother fed her lies about him, made her believe him a different type of man, made her believe there would never be anything of their relationship to salvage. And given that she's the one who Kousuke opened to, it makes me think that there must be some kind of parallel there; the way she mentioned her own mother feels like maybe her mother, too, was a manipulative - or at the very least, dishonest - person.

I don't speculate a lot on Shinhye because frankly I don't think I know enough about her to really try to talk about her, but I do think that it's very likely there's some kind of connection between Shinhye and the Hirahras or Gun. To be clear, I don't believe she's working with Yui at all. I think it's more like... Alyssa isn't the only girl who has been trafficked by Gun. What's the likelihood that Shinae and Shinhye's mother was? Given her history, the gambling addiction that was so egregious her reputation haunted Shinae and chased her to a new neighborhood and school, was she seeking money somewhere else, somewhere more dangerous? Is that part of why they had to change their name? There's so many questions left about them, and I look forward to learning more about her, but, much like with Alyssa, I think it will take time and be dropped in little tidbits like this - things to read into and try to glean something from.

And maybe we'll see more of this duo in the future? It would feel a little weird to give them this one single run in, but I'm not entirely sure. Quimchee likes to keep us on our toes. After all, Minhyuk and Shinhye have also had only the one run in. Still, I think it would be interesting to watch, if Shinhye ever felt.... I want to say maybe compelled? to dig in more to Kousuke, ever feel a kind of kinship. I don't think she'll open up to him at all, but rather, maybe she'd keep going back because a. he's wealthy and there's more she can nick from him (assuming he doesn't realize she stole anything while in his apartment, if he even remembers any of this) and b. wanting to gather more intel.

Like I said though, she's hard to read so I don't want to cling too hard to any ideas and, instead, sit back and enjoy the show.

[vandalizedheart]

if i may allow myself a monthly Joker Moment, a lot of the harshness i have towards myself tends to be a side effect of how the rpc as a whole tends to operate.

i have a lot of joy and love for the things i create. when i share them in rp spaces here though? sometimes it gets hard to keep loving them, and myself as well.

[icewindandboringhorror]

currently at That Point which occurs once every few months where one briefly begins pacing around the house teary eyed contemplating selling their own organs or becoming an online scammer or getting on anxiety meds so you can bear the risk taking required to be a hitman or so on and so forth.... why must everything so Expensive... Surely all would be healed in life if only I had one big plate of lasagna and a simple loan of $40,000 ... auoughhh....

[micechicken]

Link-Fitzgerald family making Christmas cookies as I've been promising for YEARS now...

[mogwaei]

Don't worry about being negative. I share the sentiment that there was some depth missing with the lore/story. Going from playing all the games in preparation to playing Veilguard was an almost jarring experience.

I think there's a large sentiment of people wanting to re-write Veilguard/lore in a way as well, and I can't wait to see where all these creative minds take this beloved world and treat it with the care that seemed to be absent in the hands guiding the project. Always will love the writers and animators' opinions over the game leads anyday.

I can't wait to see the end of Ouroboros! I hope you find your muse (and Solas' missing followers) and keep well -♡

That's true! Most posts I run across these days are full of criticism. I suppose I am trying to find ways to cope and probably avoiding expressing negativity because maybe then canon will magically change 😃 😃 (but I've never been good at articulating my thoughts so there's that too). To me, Veilguard didn't promote deeper thought like the other installments. And it didn't want to let go of your hand...also don't worry, everything is Solas' fault and don't you dare feel regret or guilty over your choices...also the group therapy sessions.... skfhjkf

Aaaaah same though, I hope that what happened sparks a new wave of better takes on the story. Much love to the devs, but I'll be going my own way with it <3

And thank you!! I'm writing every day, trying to catch up with where I left off. hopefully not much longer!..... I haven't posted since a few days before release. I can't wait to finish ittttt sahjkfhgjk

<3

[zackcharine]

Having another rough day already as. usual

[deus-ex-mona]

when freedom is in sight!!!!!!!!

[lunarharp]

wip thing...

of my bg3 avatar hellebore. i also did some casual nude studies of my 3 characters which i'll put under a cut... rather unlike me after all. (so WARNING for abrupt non-sexual full Artistic nudity lol...,,,,) (< won't be making a habit of this)

they mean the world to me