#loves kale chips

[pzyii]

My favourite gays hands

[bacchuschucklefuck]

Are your future bad kids like. Living in one house together or is the friendship more casual wrt to work and stuff?

oh absolutely not they mostly have their own spaces! fabian is flying around in the seacaster mansion, adaine has an apartment around the area riz's detective office is, kristen is still based in elmville so she can keep an eye out for her siblings. fig gorgug and riz technically share a house but fig moves between like five different addresses whenever she feels like it and riz spends about equal time at his offices and at everyone's places. the thing is I don't think the adventurer circles are that big? and when you grow up with that you eventually keep running into the same people. and also the bad kids still definitely spend every single holiday together regardless of what any of them individually has going on

[twilightakiishi]

the healthy food aisle at the grocery store wants to pull me in with its cute packaging but i don’t trust it

[sunshineandviolets]

Into the Unknown.

Happy (late) holidays to @yakov-vasilyev, I was your secret santa <3. Much enjoyed learning all about Devon, esp her relationship with Farah and Bobby! Hope I did your girl justice and this new year has been treating you well!! 🥰🤗💕 Fandom: The Wayhaven Chronicles Characters: Devon Kang x Farah Hauville (& Bobby Marks) @wayhavensecretsanta

The chill of the winter evening would be enough to make time slow down. From the small prickly hedgehogs curled up asleep within a pile of leaves till the warmth of spring was ready to greet them again, to the silent awes and faint twinkle in a young child’s eye as they witnessed their first snowflake. Jack frost nipped at their nose and in return heard the softest giggle as the confusion shifted to intrigue then finally pure wonder. 

It was just past 5pm and the sun had already started to set, however the crowds of townspeople on the street still remained as lively as before.- regardless of the loud honks from a vehicle that was on the verge of collapse. The night sky was lit up from the endless colourful string lights that decorated the streets. No order, just chaos spurred all over the surrounded homes. 

Devon squinted as she glanced up towards the car’s rear view mirror and grumbled once noticed the increased number of civilians that kept ‘mistaken’ the main road for a damn walkway. Her dark eyes ached with the continuous flash of lights directed towards her. The shine highlighted noticeable dark eye bags that had been one of the few consistent variables in her life thus far.  A child or even an naive adult would describe the first snowfall to commence the winter season as ‘magical’ but for someone whose car’s heating would not turn on - despite the amount of times she had punched the button to no reward - Devon was not feeling to share those same reactions as she pulled her coat furthered into herself.

 “Only a few more blocks to go”, she thought as she gripped the steering wheel tight and clenched her teeth to forcibly stop the chatter. A few more blocks till she would arrive back to a place that was once familiar and now is but a stranger. 

Devon never wanted to become an officer in the first place, that was a position forced upon her as punishment for acts of delinquency. Devon Kang - the woman who had a promising future laid out in front of her when she was growing up. She was meant to gain a successful career as a lawyer, being on top - exceeding far from other’s expectations of her. That was until he came into her life. Took her trust, her heart and had let her lay her armour down, only from him stabbed her from behind. The single revelation of the betrayal from someone she once could call hers, led to her eventual down spiral. A fallen angel , knocked off her pedestal and into a string of bad choices and decisions. Her downfall was his fault. She let him in, to drop her guard and only for him to - urgh. It was his fault.

“ So why can’t I - ? ”

Devon let out a low grunt at the nuisance of the thought of those strikingly blue eyes flashed before her, but it was another that they changed out for. Eyes as bright as the sun that rose up from the darkness, like an unexpected gift from under the tree - the reason why Devon cannot fully regret becoming the detective… if it had meant she got to meet the terrifying surprise that tipped her world upside down.

Thoughts of the sunshine vampire whirled into her mind. A bitter laugh left her as she reminiscenced their first kiss all those months ago. Strange yet needed, as through it’s what she had been missing despite never thinking to look. The vulnerable expression of Farah as she asked her for the kiss - did Farah expect her to say no? Should she have? Any doubt that remained was erased once Devon’s mind shifted to the taste of Farah’s candy scented lip gloss. It happened in almost an instant, yet remained gentle and soft like a touch of a sunny clear day.  Felt the sweetness of newly bloomed roses. After they both moved apart, that blissful kiss still lingered on her lips. The deeper she delved in thought about her new girlfriend, the increase of a chill crept along her back. This is new territory for her and one that Devon has yet to believe or understand that she even deserved. 

A few moments passed and Devon eventually arrived at the station. It was once a home away from home, but ever since her forced promotion at the agency she had found herself hesitant by the foot of the stone steps. She watched as the light shined brightly through the windows from the cold shadows. She never understood how her old co-workers could just easily stroll in a place and make conversation without a stumble. All it had taken was a single look from Devon and the others would avoid and cower like she had the plague. She certainly never smelt bad - always remained rather pristine and put together with style, she thought whilst she smoothed down her pressed shirt. 

A ping from her phone broke her chain of thought. Devon does not save people's numbers usually. A small contact list, less names to remember - only those that she actually cares about. 

Tina Poname, 5:12pm. Seen. 

“Dev! You coming to pick your things up or what?”

Tina Poname, 5:13pm. Seen.

“Don’t make me throw your shit in the trash - I will do it 😤”

Devon rolled her eyes, typed out a quick response then shoved the phone back into her coat pocket. Tina’s threats are not some to dismiss. 

Devon Kang, 5:13pm. Sent.

“Try it and I will break your plant.” 

She sighed whilst taking the steps back into a place that felt more as a distant memory. Devon brushed past individuals that made their way out of the building, ignorant of the pleasantries that were thrown her way. 

***

In and out. 

That was all it was supposed to be.

Get in, grab her stuff then leave. In and out. As easy as that. So, why was she stood in front of a bare naked pine tree with a box of cheap plastic ornaments in her hands. Devon wrinkled her nose when she remembered Tina’s big and bold pleading eyes. Devon was about to shrug her request off before Tina pulled out her trap card. 

“Well this could be a rather difficult task, if you think you won’t be able to handle it then I suppose I could have another - ”

Devon sneered at her past self’s foolishness to fall for such a low blow trick that had landed her to decorate a tree over twice her size. Devon dealt with worse, she knew she didn't need help to assist with such a mindless task. Anyone around her knew better to ask or dealt with the agent’s stone cold glare that could rival Adams. 

Like a blur, time sped up whilst Devon concentrated with the decorations. Volunteers, co workers, guests flew around and past her in all directions - but her focus remained on the tree. No time for pointless greetings or goodbyes, she had a system and it would be followed.

The moment she was unable to find the star topper, Devon decided it was a decent time for a break. That and her stomach betrayed her. She headed for the vending machine, typed out the number, tapped her card and waited for her chips.

And waited.  

… Still waited. 

Devon inched closer with anticipation whilst the bag started to tilt forward and … nothing. It just remained still, mocked her from behind the glass. She kicked at the machine, once or perhaps multiple times, but the chips still refused to budge. How was it that she could shove over an old powerful supernatural, but it was a single bag of chips that held its own against her? At least most people had already left for the day to not see a grown woman’s beef with a mechanical box.

“Oh angel, take it easy on the machine. You are going to leave a dent.” 

Devon groaned and the hairs on the back of her neck stiffened up at that dreadful name. Not even needed to glance away from her new inanimate enemy, she already knew exactly who arrived. She let out another low grunt as she gave the machine one last hard kick, yet the chips remained attached on the rack. 

“Need some assistance there, before you break company property - oh! I meant your ex - company’s property.” Devon made the fatal mistake and shifted her gaze to glance up at the taller man with his smug grin that pierced a burnt feeling in her chest. Bobby Marks leaned against the vending machine with a journalist pass displayed around his neck.

“Ah great. Just when my headache was thought to have gone” She rolled her eyes and spoke in a neutral tone, “the detective is not present, you have no business here.” “Who said I was here for business and not pleasure?” He winked and Devon just barely managed to hold in another groan. He already used that line once before in the past.

She was tired, she had a very brief moment of weakness and it was late - way too late. Devon was usually quite pragmatic, but in that moment, her mind betrayed her when she held the door open for him. Without a second to process, she felt a rough wet collision between their lips. An overwhelming scent of his cologne scraped against her nose. The kiss itself is as she expected. A fight for control. Urgency or desperation? Doesn’t matter. It was over as quick as it had started. After the sounds of betrayal, almost used once again for nothing more than a scoop - she will not allow herself to fall for that same mistake again. 

“But really what a surprise to find you here after your sudden promotion, must be a christmas miracle - “ “It’s the fourth of December.”

Bobby continued as though she never interrupted, “and here I worried that agency of yours had kept you locked up and you’d tragically never see my handsome face again.” Devon noted the venom laced on his tongue at the slight mention of the agency. She managed to array Bobby’s suspicions of her new workplace and unordinary colleagues for the past couple of months, but how long will that secret last? Knowing Bobby for as long as she does, he won’t stop till he figured out the truth. 

Devon rolled her eyes again at his comment, but stopped at the sound of a bag drop. Her eyes darted towards the row ‘035’ and that very same chip bag had indeed fallen onto the tray. When her gaze moved towards the control panel, her surprise quickly shifted to a glare towards her conversation partner who was in the process of putting away his card.

“I did not need your help.” Bobby scoffed lightly, “Bold of you to assume these were for you.” He reached down faster enough to beat her for the winning prize. He opened her bag. He took out her chips. With the usual smirk drawn on his face, crunched down on each chip. One by one. However, it did not last as that nauseating smirk faded into a knowing grimace.

Bobby let out a loud cough and tossed the bag onto an empty desk, “Kale? Who on earth would choose to eat kale flavoured chips?” Devon scoffs with a small quirk of a smile “it’s called being healthy, why don’t you try it some time?” Bobby rubbed a hand on the corners of his mouth, “it’s called being pretentious, Kang.”

“Takes one to know one, Marks.”  

Bobby took a few steps closer towards Devon, leaned down to match her height “we always had much in common, hadn’t we? Shame truly we don’t spend nearly enough time together anymore to explore - “

Devon was about to snap back at him, if it wasn’t for her surprise wrapped up in all colours of the rainbow. 

“Dev!! Honey! I saw your car outside, are you in here?”

Farah’s booming voice echoed through the office, a pleasant chime to the ears. She had a peppy spring to her steps, with her poofy skirt bouncing along with her and colourful rainbow stockings proudly on display. She swung around a small woven tote bag, whilst she skipped with a beaming smile towards Devon. 

“You would not believe what I managed to score, and for free as well!” Farah’s excitement could radiate an entire room with how much twinkle would shine from her amber eyes. 

Bobby let out a loud cough and Farah’s bounce halted and finally realised his existence in the scene. He was not amused, “We were having a conversation here.” Farah threw him a disinterested gaze up and down with a shrug “emphasis on ‘were’. You are no longer needed - not when the real gift has arrived!” She gives a small twirl of the skirt and sent a wink at Devon. Devon snorted at the man’s insulted face. She hesitated at first but reached over for Farah’s hand and gave it a small squeeze. 

Bobby glanced between both women then at their joined hands, gave a slight roll of the eyes before he plastered a tight smile. “Oh! It seems I am getting a call,”  He whipped out his phone and very obviously typed out a number. He kept his gaze locked onto Devon as he spoke, “Hello there Harriet, did you miss me?” Devon just scoffed at his antics. 

Farah stuck her tongue out at the man when he headed out of the station, then shook her head and sighed, “What a total weirdo. Good thing you totally upgraded from that, right honey?” She glanced towards her with an anxious smile. Farah has always been rather open, going through life, her heart on her sleeve, even a hint of insecurity can easily slip past that smiley façade. However, without the necessity of words, Devon lifted their joined hands to press a faint kiss on her knuckles and those once anxious thoughts simply faded away. 

Farah’s cheeks darkened and sputtered out a soft laugh “oh gosh - wow. Gotta say babes, I'm never truly tired of finding these surprises of yours hidden within.” Devon showed a small inch of a smile and Farah’s grin widened, then blinked for a second “Wait, what was I going to say again?” Devon glanced at the tote bag and raised a single brow, Farah clapped her hands “Oh right! Check it.” She opened the bag and revealed a small box of freshly baked mince pies. “Some old human was selling a bunch on the street and she ended up giving me a box with no charge! Must have been hypnotised by my adorable face, haha!” Devon purses her lips in slight confusion, “firstly I am not going to argue about ‘adorableness’ of your face as that’s obviously true to a fact,” Farah blew her a kiss. “But you are a vampire, aren’t you not? You don’t need to eat actual foods.” Farah flapped her hand, “Need? No. But I heard these small pie things are a big deal this time of the year, so I was curious what all the hype was about.” Farah shuffled near, their hands still joined, the sudden closeness caused a warmth to bloom on Devon’s cheeks. “And I thought you might appreciate the snack.”

Devon hadn’t told anyone she was heading to the station. Hadn’t told anyone if she was eating out or staying in. But despite not knowing if they were going to meet, Farah still thought of her. She used her free hand to gently cup her girlfriend’s cheek. Examined her for any possible ulterior motives, tricks or tomfoolery - but what she deduced was nothing but the earnest truth, as she has always been.

“You are forever on my mind, honey. I hope you know that. If not, I do not mind getting to remind you every second of every day.” Left speechless, Devon responded with a slow nod. She leaned up slightly for a gentle kiss with a short breath of relief that escaped her lips. Farah’s leg propped up with her arms around Devon’s waist, kept her close and near. A picturesque portrait with the newly decorated tree behind the blossoming couple and seemingly Devon finally found the star. 

All she wishes for this Christmas season is not to lose her shooting star anytime soon. 

The End.

[indiegame]

best coworker is giving me a ride home. bless.

[kalembappe]

Kylian Mbappe Smut

He gets a boner while you’re laying in between his legs while watching a documentary. You were just trying to watch the docu, nothing more and nothing less. For Kylian it’s hard not to get flustered by you. He genuinely can’t help it. You make fun of him for it, but then it just turns into full smut. Thank you.

i cackled when you went "Thank you" in the end. It's unusually polite. But here i guess 🙄

[beheadable]

Feeling VERY antisocial today spending my time sketchin Portman and relaxing wif Soba

[hgfictionwriter]

D.D.

Jessie Fleming x Reader

Summary: You and your friends need a ride home after a rowdy brunch together. Thankfully, ever patient, dutiful Jessie is there to drive you all - if she can endure the teasing and attention you and your friends shower her with.

Warning: Inebriation. Mild language.

A/N: Long suffering, Golden Retriever-esque girlfriend Jessie. I felt compelled to write a silly fluff piece after the recent angst.

Jessie frowned as she scanned the groups of people along the sidewalk while she slowly drove past several storefronts and restaurants. Then, even through the closed car windows, she could hear riotous hollering and laughing.

She shook her head and bit back a laugh as she spotted you and your friends standing out front of a restaurant clearly cracking yourselves up over God knows what.

She checked her mirror and pulled over, slowing to a stop. You spotted her and started jumping up and down waving excitedly, causing your friends to turn and do the same.

"Jessie!!" Your friends yelled and cheered as you all clamoured towards the car.

"Jesus Christ," she muttered under her breath as she sunk in her seat slightly and watched you all laughing and jostling against one another as you approached. You didn’t do this kind of thing too often, so it was amusing and she had to smile.

You reached the passenger door and bent down to smile and wave again before opening it. She'd just seen you this morning, but she found herself beaming upon seeing you again.

"Hi baby," you greeted as you climbed into the passenger seat, albeit, a bit clumsily. You immediately leaned over the middle console for a kiss and she fought through a laugh to give you one.

"How was your morning, baby," you went on as you went to put on your seatbelt, nearly knocking her water bottle out of the cupholder as you did so. She reached out to stabilize it while you didn't even notice.

"It was fine," she answered plainly, knowing you weren't even really listening. "How was-"

Your friends finally settled who was sitting where and opened the back doors to pile in, chaos ensuing, the car rocking back and forth as they all shuffled and pushed into place.

"Hi Jessie," they all said in unison in a singsong voice before they all doubled over into laughter. You joined them though you spun in your seat to playfully swat at them.

"Good afternoon, ladies," Jessie deadpanned, though she smirked at them in the rearview mirror. She placed an elbow on the arm rest and turned to face them. "How was brunch?"

Clearly, the drinks had been flowing.

"It was so good. You have to come next time," one of your friends said as she reached out and squeezed Jessie's arm. She rolled her eyes and sat forward in her seat again.

"And interrupt mimosa hours? Interrupt girl talk? No way. I couldn't," she said dramatically.

"You're allowed!" Your other friend said.

"And take away Y/N's chance to vent about me? No," Jessie went on with a teasing look your way. You laughed, swatting at her arm.

"Yeah right," your friend dismissed readily. "The worst thing she has to say about you is that you try to make her eat kale chips instead of regular chips."

"I'm a monster," Jessie said dryly.

"Yeah, that's why you're the only one brave enough to pick us up," your other friend said, all of you dissolving into laughter again. "Lord knows [their bf] is ‘too busy’."

"He's such an asshole," you blurted out. "You just need to dump his ass already."

"Well, when you find me someone as lovely as this angel over here," your friend said in exaggeration as she gestured in Jessie's direction, "I will." She leaned forward, almost falling off her seat as she tried to get Jessie's attention. "Y/N said you have a brother. Is he like you? Is he single?"

"Nope," Jessie cut-off, holding up a hand and shaking her head. "We're not going there." Despite herself, she could feel her face heating up under the attention of your friends. It was like this every time, drinks or not. She turned around and pointed to each of your friends. "Seatbelts."

"Yes, Jessie," they answered in that silly singsong response again and Jessie flushed further. She sighed exaggeratedly before turning on her blinker and pulling out into traffic.

"You guys," you said sarcastically as you turned around again to face your friends. "Stop fawning over her like that. You know she hates the attention," you finished with an eyeroll before cocking your head at her, a lilt in your voice. "She can't help it if she's the sweetest, most beautiful, nerdiest, yet incredibly athletic, woman alive."

The car erupted in giggles.

"Oh my God," Jessie said over the noise. "You can all rideshare next time."

"You say that, but you love us," your friend said as she leaned forward, hands on the back of Jessie's seat. She let herself fall back into her own seat and snickered. "And lord knows you wouldn't want your Y/N risking a rideshare with some stranger."

"I'd be more concerned for the stranger than for you, lot," she retorted, cracking a smirk.

The quips and teasing continued throughout the ride.

"I'm hungry," you complained as she was a few blocks away from her first drop-off. A half hearted glower crossed her face as she shot you a look.

"Yeah, me too!" Came a chime of replies.

She shook her head. "Seriously? I thought you all just ate."

"Don't judge us," you chided teasingly, knowing she was just giving you all a hard time. "Where are you going to take us for food?" You asked lightly as you looked out the window. Jessie sighed and updated her navigation.

She sighed once more as she went through the impossible feat of trying to round up your orders as she pulled up to a nearby drive thru. One of your friends changed her order as Jessie was finishing relaying things and she called back, "No, I already ordered."

"Jess," you pleaded, drawing out her name. "Be nice."

She whipped her head around to look at you. She mouthed. "Be nice?" She laughed. "I'm driving your tipsy asses all around town and getting you lunch! Be nice," she finished with a scoff. Though she, of course, did update the order. Begrudgingly? Exasperated? Perhaps. But she couldn’t say ‘no’ to you.

You gave her an apologetic look and rubbed her arm in consolation before kissing her hand. She shook her head at herself. Who was she kidding - if you asked her this second to drive a town over ‘just because’, she would’ve if it would make you happy.

The car was refreshingly quiet as you all sipped on your drinks and ate your food, but it only lasted so long. The sustenance seemed to top up all of your energy levels and now you were all singing along to some ridiculous pop song you'd put on.

Finally, she reached your one friend's house, pulling into her driveway.

"Thank you, Jessie," your friend said sweetly as she pulled herself forward in her seat to give Jessie a peck on the cheek. The brunette grimaced and she brought her shoulders up around her ears as her face began to burn hot.

Each drop off went the same. They tortured her with a kiss on the cheek and one, your best friend, pinching her cheek lightly before ducking out with a laugh.

“Love you two!” Your friend called as she half stumbled up the walk to her door with a wave.

Jessie waited dutifully until your friend was safely in the house before she put the car in reverse and pulled out.

“Thank God,” she groaned facetiously as she let her head fall back heavily against the headrest. She glanced purposefully at you to find you smiling adoringly at her. She feigned a frown anyway. “You’re lucky I love you.”

“You’re a good sport,” you smiled.

“Don’t you forget it,” Jessie laughed and drove you both home.

“Thank you, baby,” you said as you leaned in and gave her a kiss once you were inside the apartment. She could still taste a faint hint of booze on your lips and she gave you an amused look. You just smiled in a mild daze. “You’re the best.”

You spun on your heel and clasped your hands together. “Oo can we watch [y/favourite movie]?”

Jessie chuckled and rolled her eyes. “Can I read my book at the same time?”

You rested your palms on her shoulders and leaned heavily in, lips stopping an inch from hers. “Of course, baby.”

Jessie rolled her eyes again and gave you a smirk as she turned you around and ushered you towards the couch. “Let’s get you settled.”

You started the movie and she laid out a blanket over you. She gave you a kiss on the top of your head.

“I’m gonna grab my book and I’ll bring you some water,” she told you as she turned to leave.

“Want me to take something out of the freezer for dinner?” She called as she came back down the hall and ducked into the kitchen. She opened the freezer and peeked over her shoulder when she heard no response. “Babe?”

She closed the drawer and returned to the living room. She opened her mouth to speak, but stopped when she saw you sprawled out on the couch fast asleep.

A goofy grin crossed her face as she quietly crossed the room over to you. The blanket had fallen partially off of you and she gingerly pulled it back up over you. She pushed a stray lock of hair out of your face and paused the movie.

She snickered quietly as she gently sat down next to you and opened her book. She whispered. “Wild brunch, hey babe?”

[echo-riot]

Posting somthing that isn’t sevika???? Unheard of

Anyways-

VI DATING HEADCANONS + a Cute Drabble

Vi is naturally protective of her girl. Whether you’re in Piltover or Zaun, she insists on walking you home, her arm wrapped securely around your waist. If anyone so much as looks at you wrong, she’ll shoot them a death glare—or worse.

Vi is incredibly touchy. She loves holding your hand, resting her chin on your shoulder, or pulling you into a hug from behind. Her love language is physical touch, and she craves that connection constantly.

Vi shows her love through actions. She’ll fix things around your place, bring you your favorite snack, or leave her jacket draped over your shoulders when you’re cold.

Vi loves simple dates—grabbing greasy food from street vendors, exploring Zaun’s markets, or sparring with you just for fun. But she’ll also surprise you with occasional grand gestures, like taking you to a rooftop to watch the city lights.

Vi tries to play it cool, but she’s easily jealous. If someone flirts with you, she’ll wrap an arm around your waist and kiss your temple, making it crystal clear you’re hers

She doesn’t care much about social norms or what others think. If someone makes a snide comment about you, she won’t hesitate to step in, fists clenched and ready to defend you

While she loves teasing, Vi has a soft spot for calling you endearing names when it’s just the two of you—“baby,” “love,” or even a unique nickname tied to an inside joke. She tries out the weirdest nicknames for you too, ranging from “Snuggle Punch” to “Hot Pocket.” The worst part? She says them with complete sincerity. You had to veto “Big Toe”

Vi has exactly three cooking settings: “burnt,” “raw,” and “how is the fire alarm not going off yet?” Every date night she insists she’ll “nail it this time,” and every date night ends with takeout and her swearing vengeance on your oven.

She constantly tries to convince you that chips and energy drinks are a balanced meal. If you so much as suggest eating a vegetable, she’ll dramatically gag and say, “I didn’t survive the Lanes to die of kale poisoning, babe.”

Vi sucks at being low-key when she’s plotting a surprise for you. She’ll come back from shopping with a giant bag, shove it behind her back, and loudly declare, “You didn’t see anything! Nope, definitely not a gift for you in here!”

If you work out together, Vi’s that girlfriend who slaps your back and yells, “ONE MORE REP, BABE!” like she’s training you for the Zaunite Olympics. But the second you spot her doing squats, she’s flexing and asking if you’re checking her out.

She has zero chill when someone flirts with you. She’ll immediately put on her gauntlets (if she has them nearby) or crack her knuckles and stare the poor soul down while saying, “What part of ‘taken’ did you miss, buddy?”

Vi has horrendous taste in movies and insists on watching the cheesiest action flicks with you. She’ll quote every single bad one-liner like it’s gospel and randomly yell, “EXPLOSIONS!” during quiet scenes.

Vi is the queen of spontaneous dumb ideas. “Babe, let’s wrestle.” “Babe, I think we should dye your hair pink.” “Babe, dare me to jump over that fence.” (Spoiler: she’ll do it whether or not you dare her.)

Vi texts like she’s trying to solve a riddle, constantly sending random emojis that make no sense. “🏴‍☠️🥊🔥🦖” somehow translates to, “I’m at the gym, love you, want pizza later?”

Vi snores. Loudly. And if you try to wake her up, she’ll grumble something like, “Shut up, babe. I’m fighting shimmer thugs in my dream.” She also steals all the blankets and leaves you clinging to the corner of the bed like it’s a survival raft.

If she gets the tiniest injury, she’ll act like she’s on her deathbed. “Babe, I think my pinky’s broken. You might need to kiss it better. No, wait, kiss my whole hand. Actually, better make it both hands—just in case.” (Only for you though.)

Vi loves hitting you with the dumbest pickup lines imaginable. “Are you shimmer? ‘Cause you’ve got me addicted, babe.” She’ll then smirk like she’s the smoothest person alive.

————————————————————————____________________________________________

You sat at a table in the corner of The Last Drop, sipping on your drink while Vi sulked dramatically next to you. She had her chin propped on her hand, eyes darting to a group across the room. You followed her gaze to a couple of young women laughing and glancing in your direction.

“Vi, they’re not even looking at me anymore,” you whispered, trying not to laugh.

“Oh, they were looking, alright,” Vi grumbled, narrowing her eyes. “I saw it. That one in the green? She was trying to undress you with her eyes. And not even subtly.”

You rolled your eyes. “They were probably just curious about your big, scary gauntlets. Or the fact that you stomped in here like you own the place.”

“I do own the place when I’m with you,” she said, dead serious. Then she grabbed your hand and laced her fingers through yours. “Look. If anyone tries anything, I’ll break their noses. Just blink twice if I need to go over there.”

“Vi,” you said, squeezing her hand, “no one’s coming over here. And if they do, I can handle myself.”

She glanced at you, clearly skeptical. “Babe, I love you, but you once tripped over your own feet walking to the kitchen.”

You burst out laughing, making her smirk.

“Oh, you think I’m funny?” she teased, leaning closer until her face was inches from yours. “What’s funny is the fact that you can’t stop thinking about me.”

“Oh yeah?” you said, leaning back with a grin. “You’re so cocky. What would you do if I wasn’t thinking about you?”

Vi’s expression turned mock-serious. “I’d probably throw myself into the Hexgate,” she deadpanned. “Start a new life on the other side of the world.”

You snorted. “And then what? Punch your way back to zaun?”

“Damn right,” she said, sitting up straight and puffing out her chest. “No one gets to steal my girl’s attention. Not even a Hexgate.”

Despite her ridiculous antics, her thumb gently traced circles over your hand, grounding you in the little moment you shared. You leaned into her side, your laughter dying into a soft smile.

“You’re an idiot,” you murmured.

“And you’re stuck with me,” she shot back, pressing a quick kiss to your temple.

Yeah, you were stuck with her. But with Vi, life was never boring—and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

[pickingupmymercedes]

All these little things - Lewis Hamilton

Lots of fluff. 9 snippets of fluff to be exact (plus 9 more to come on Sunday - pt 2)

Also there's 20 more fluffs just like these ones - Ways to say I love you and Ways to say I love you pt. 2

pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Reader!

wordcount: +3k

a/n: I've gotten so many requests for fluff Lewis, regular things with Lewis, just Lewis being a bf/husband. So,I hope you guys enjoy mostly domestic moments with him.

As always, I'm open for feedback, come say hi!

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Late night snack

The rhythmic rumble of a passing truck vibrated through the floor, a jarring counterpoint to the silence pressing against her eardrums. Jet lag, the unwelcome souvenir of her whirlwind trip to Paris, had her wide awake at 3:14 am, staring at the unfamiliar shapes of Lewis's NY apartment.

Her stomach, thankfully, didn't mirror the wide-awake state. In fact, the thought of food sent a shudder through her. But the disorienting quietness, punctuated only by the city's lullaby of honking horns, demanded some kind of action.

She slipped out of bed, the cool floor a stark contrast to the plush carpets of the bedroom. Padding down the hallway, she felt a strange sense of displacement. This wasn't their Monaco or London apartment, but Lewis's NYC one, and while they’ve been living together for a while they would seldom stay there.

The warm glow of the kitchen light drew her like a moth to a flame. She rummaged through the fridge, her fingers brushing against a carton of leftover takeout, a half-eaten bag of kale chips, and a jar of something labeled "Grandma's Pickles."

Just as she opened the jar, a sleepy voice filled the doorway.

"Night pick me up?" Lewis stood there, hair tousled and eyes crinkled with sleep. He wore a worn t-shirt that hung tight on his broad frame, and even in the dim light, she could see the rumpled remnants of a smile playing on his lips.

"Couldn't sleep" she mumbled, putting the pickle jar on the island.

"Jet lag?" He crossed the room, his presence filling the previously empty space. She nodded, feeling a blush creep up my cheeks. "Yeah, I guess."

He leaned closer, his scent - a mix of cologne and the lingering warmth of sleep - washing over her. "Next time, call me so we can raid the fridge together" he teased, his eyes twinkling.

She stuck her tongue out at him playfully. "They're Grandma's Pickles! How could I resist?"

He reached out, taking the jar gently, setting it on the counter. He pulled her to his body, his embrace a warm haven in the cool night. "You know," he said, his lips brushing against her ear, sending shivers down her spine, "sometimes the best cure for jet lag is a good cuddle."

She laughed. "Is that a doctor's recommendation, Dr. Hamilton?" He pulled back slightly, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "The most handsome doctor you know," he corrected, before leaning down and capturing her lips in a soft kiss.

The kiss was slow and sweet, a gentle reassurance. Pulling away, Lewis rested his forehead on hers, his voice a warm rumble against her skin. "Truth is," he admitted, "I woke up missing you."

Lazy sunday Mornings

The silence was almost unsettling. Lewis, accustomed to the constant hum of activities, found the stillness of his mom's house almost jarring.

He cracked open one eye, surprised to see a sliver of sunlight already peeking through the curtains. It was way too early for a lazy Sunday morning, especially after a grueling season.

He glanced over at Y/n, her head buried in the crook of his neck, fast asleep. A soft smile tugged at his lips. He loved seeing her so relaxed, the worry lines on her forehead smoothed out, a gentle rhythm rising and falling with her breath.

He reached out, tracing a fingertip down her cheek, the temptation to wake her with a kiss strong. But before he could act, a soft groan escaped Y/n's lips. Her eyes fluttered open, blinking sleepily at him. "Morning" Lewis murmured; his voice rough with disuse.

Y/n stretched; her smile sleepy but undeniably beautiful. "Too early" she mumbled, pulling him closer. Lewis chuckled, wrapping his arm around her. "Couldn't sleep," he admitted. "The silence is...different."

Y/n laughed softly. "Close your eyes" she said, her voice a soothing whisper.

He raised an eyebrow, intrigued. Before he could ask, she began gently tracing the back of her finger to the bridge of his nose. It was an unexpected sensation, a light tickle that soothed something within him. He felt his eyelids growing heavy, the rhythmic move lulling him back to sleep.

He drifted off in a haze, fragments of dreams swirling around him. A couple of hours, punctuated by the occasional weird dream, must have passed because the next thing he knew, a high-pitched squeal pierced the peaceful silence.

"Uncle Lewis! Wake up!"

Lewis groaned, burying his head under the pillow. Another voice, slightly deeper this time, chimed in. "Come on, Auntie Y/n! Uncle Lewis is being a lazy bum again!"

Y/n giggled, a mischievous glint in her eyes. She leaned over and whispered in his ear, "Sorry, my secret weapon doesn’t work on them”

Lewis peeked out from under the pillow to see his niece and nephew bouncing on the bed, their faces alight with excitement. There went his peaceful Sunday morning, but the sight of their bright smiles chased away any lingering sleepiness. It was time to be Uncle Lewis for the day.

Roscoe photos

Y/N stifled a yawn, her eyes glazing over at the endless stream of spreadsheets projected on the screen. The board meeting droned on, each statistic sounding more monotonous than the last. Glancing around the table, she saw her colleagues diligently taking notes, their expressions an equal mix of concentration and fatigue.

A notification buzzed on her phone, a welcome distraction. Unlocking it, she saw a picture on Instagram – a close-up of Roscoe staring intently at the camera with his tongue lolling out in a comical fashion. The message: "Deep in thought... about treats?"

Y/N chuckled silently, the image instantly bringing a smile. She quickly tapped a like, then sent a playful message back to Lewis: "Looks like someone's plotting world domination... or maybe just the next jar raid."

Before she could put her phone down, another notification popped up. This time, the picture was Roscoe sprawled across a fluffy white rug, toasting in a sunbeam. The caption: "Living my best life. Don't be jealous."

Y/N couldn't help but grin. Lewis clearly had a newfound time killer – chronicling Roscoe's every move.

Over the next hour, the barrage of photos continued. There was Roscoe sporting a pair of tiny sunglasses, another with a flower crown perched precariously on his head, and yet another napping in a miniature F1 car. Each picture accompanied by a silly caption, making Y/N laugh silently behind her hand.

The sheer absurdity of it all was a welcome escape from the monotony of the meeting. She pictured Lewis, presumably bored at his own meeting, deciding to entertain her with Roscoe's antics.

It was a sweet gesture, a silent way of connecting with her amidst their busy schedules.

Finally, silence descended upon the boardroom as the meeting concluded. Y/N stretched, a relieved sigh escaping her lips. Reaching for her phone, she sent a final message to Lewis: "Thanks for the Roscoe spam. You made this meeting a bit more bearable!"

Almost instantly, her phone buzzed again. A new picture filled the screen – this time, it was Lewis himself, a sheepish grin on his face, with Roscoe perched on his lap. The caption read: "Just your average meeting attendees. Don't tell Toto."

Cramps

A dull pain ripped through Y/N, jolting her awake. Moonlight streamed through the bedroom window, casting the room in a soft, silvery glow. Disoriented for a moment, she blinked back trying to grasp what was happening.

The monthly visitor arrived at least once every cycle, and tonight was no different.

Throwing off the covers, she shuffled towards the kitchen, her body a symphony of discomfort. Reaching for the familiar bottle of pain relief on the top shelf, she fumbled slightly, wincing at another twinge. Grabbing a glass of water, she popped a couple of pills and made her way back to the bedroom, hoping the medication would kick in soon.

Sliding back under the covers, she snuggled in beside Lewis, who stirred slightly in his sleep. A moan escaping her lips as another cramp flared up.

Sensing her discomfort, Lewis sleeply wrapped his arm around her, pulling her close. "Everything alright, love?" his voice was thick with sleep, but still holding concern.

"Just the usual," she mumbled, burrowing deeper into his warmth. "Cramps." He understood. They'd talked about it before.

Without a word, he shifted their positions, maneuvering her back to his chest and reaching his hands under her shirt to rest gently on her lower abdomen. A silent communication, a shared language they'd built over time.

His touch was soothing, a welcome contrast to the ache radiating from within. His large hands, usually so strong, felt surprisingly gentle as they pressed against her skin. The warmth seemed to seep into her, easing the tension knot by knot. A sigh of relief escaped her lips as he acted as her own human sized heating bag.

As the cramps eased, Y/N snuggled closer. She could have sworn she felt Lewis's lips brush against the back of her head, a silent promise of being there for her.

Winning Celebration

The rhythmic crash of waves against the Monaco shoreline provided a calming white noise backdrop to the quiet murmurs in Lewis' living room. Sunlight, filtered through the floor-to-ceiling windows, casting an especially warm string of light to the tangled mess of limbs sprawled under a thin duvet.

Lewis, his bare chest lightly dusted with golden sunlight, held Y/n close, his fingers tracing idle patterns on the small of her back.

"You were incredible this weekend" Y/n whispered, her voice husky. "That overtake at Sainte Devote? Pure magic."

Lewis chuckled, a low rumble that vibrated against her ear. "Just had a feeling " he admitted, a playful glint in his eyes.

"Course you did" Y/n continued, a playful smirk tugging at her lips as he leaned down to place a soft kiss on her neck.

Just then, the sound of the front door creaking open shattered the peaceful intimacy. A loud, slightly slurred voice echoed through the apartment, "Alright, I brought those-"

The voice, belonging to one of Lewis' friend, cut off abruptly as the realization of what he'd walked in on dawned on him. He stood frozen for a beat, his eyes widening at the sight of them entangled on the living room rug, bathed in sunlight.

"Don't mind me" Daniel finally stammered, his voice thick with embarrassment and amusement "I'm clearly way too drunk for this. Don’t worry I won't be remembering any of this."

Y/n buried her face in Lewis' chest, a strangled giggle escaping her lips. Lewis, meanwhile, burst into laughter, the tension dissolving into a wave of relief and amusement.

"Typical" Lewis chuckled, shaking his head. "Always the party crasher."

Y/n peeked up from his chest, a playful glint in her eyes. "See? Told you he wouldn't be fazed," she teased, remembering a previous, similar incident involving a particularly enthusiastic post-podium celebration.

Lewis grinned, pulling her closer. "Seems you were right" he admitted, his voice laced with affection. "Now, how about we get ourselves to the bedroom before he decides to join us?"

Y/n raised an eyebrow playfully. "Sorry, I don’t share." Her lips crashing into his as he brought her even closer.

Stargazing

The humid costal Cape Town air hung thick and heavy as Y/N and Lewis stepped out onto their hotel balcony. A million diamond-like stars glittered across the velvet expanse of the sky at the distant villa they were staying at.

"The night sky here is so clear" Lewis breathed, tilting his head back to take it all in.

Y/N smiled, a wave of nostalgia washing over her. "Look south," she instructed, pointing towards a constellation of four bright stars forming a perfect cross. "See that? That's the Southern Cross."

Lewis squinted, following her finger. "The Southern Cross? I've never seen it before."

"It's not visible from most places in Europe" she explained. "It's our signpost back in South America. My dad always says that whenever we get lost, all we have to do is find the Southern Cross. It always points south, it points home."

A warm feeling spread through her chest as she pointed to each star in the cross. "See, the little arm on the left is Mimosa, and the one on the right, slightly dimmer, is Pálida - 'pale' in portuguese. The longer arm pointing north is called Rubídea, and the longest one, pointing due south, that's the Magalhães star, named after the explorer."

Lewis chuckled. "And the one in the middle, kind of squeezed between the right arm and the south one?"

Y/N grinned. "That's Intrometida," she declared. "It means 'nosy'. It's the odd one out, just hanging out there in the middle."

Lewis laughed, a low rumble in his chest. " Fits the description."

They stood in comfortable silence for a while, simply gazing up at the breathtaking display of stars. The vastness of the universe felt humbling, and yet, the familiarity of the Southern Cross, a beacon from her childhood, brought a sense of comfort.

"Thank you for showing me this" Lewis finally said, his voice soft as his fingers reached for hers and he held her gazer "But my favorite part of this view is right here beside me."

Late night driving

Rain lashed against the windshield, blurring the neon glow of oncoming traffic into streaks of light. The countryside, usually a picturesque blur of rolling hills and quaint villages, was now an inky expanse punctuated by the occasional farmhouse windows alight.

Y/N gripped the steering wheel a little tighter, the late-night drive back home to London starting to feel endless.

A glance at the passenger seat revealed Lewis, his head resting back against the headrest, a peaceful expression on his face. He was supposed to be in charge of the music for the long journey, but exhaustion, brought on by a long day of meetings at the factory, had clearly won him over.

Y/N stifled a yawn, her eyelids growing heavy. Reaching for her phone, she pressed the home button.

"Hey Siri," she said, her voice barely a whisper. "Yes, Y/N, how can I help you?" came the disembodied voice from the phone's speaker.

"Play some upbeat songs, please" Y/N requested. A beat of silence followed, then the unmistakable opening chords of "Dancing Queen" by ABBA filled the car.

Y/N's lips curved into a smile. Maybe a little cheese was exactly what she needed.

Just as the chorus picked up a startled groan erupted from the passenger seat. Lewis jolted awake, blinking rapidly as he adjusted to the sudden change in light and sound.

"What is this?" he exclaimed; his voice thick with sleep.

Y/N glanced over at him, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "Abba?!" she replied, tapping her finger rhythmically on the steering wheel in time with the music. "You know, since you failed in your designated DJ duties."

Lewis's face scrunched up in mock horror. "Seriously? Dancing queen?!” Y/N laughed. "Hey, classics never go out of style. Besides," she added, a teasing lilt in her voice, "how can you resist singing along?"

Lewis opened his mouth to protest, then a ghost of a smile played on his lips. He sighed dramatically. "Alright, alright," he conceded, "but only because you’re driving”

Y/N winked at him, her heart lighter. The rain continued to fall outside, but inside the car, filled with ABBA and the playful banter between them, the long drive felt a little less daunting.

Ironing shirt

A low hum danced across the room and dragged Y/n from her sleep. Disoriented for a moment, she blinked, the hum resolving itself into the rhythmic hiss of an iron.

She turned her head, a smile tugging at her lips. There, across their motorhome room, stood Lewis, shoulders broad and relaxed as he glided the iron over a crisp white shirt. The scene, domesticity in all its glory.

"Lew?" she rasped; her voice thick with sleep. He glanced up, a smile mirroring hers as he set the iron down. "Morning. Sleep well?"

"Yeah" she mumbled, burrowing deeper into the covers. "What are you doing?"

"Making sure your shirt is crispy" he said with a bright smile on his lips, picking the iron back up.

Y/n stretched languidly, the sheet slipping down her shoulder and revealing his t-shirt she had slept in. " You really didn’t have to”

Lewis chuckled, a warm rumble in his chest. "Non sense". He gestured towards the bed. "Come on now, sleepyhead. We need to leave soon."

With a sigh, Y/n threw back the covers and padded across his motor room, the plush carpet a welcome comfort against her bare feet. She wrapped her arms around Lewis from behind, pressing her cheek against his back.

"You shouldn't have done that" she mumbled into his shirt.

"Shouldn't have ironed your shirt?"

"No, woken up so early." Lewis turned in his arms, his brow furrowed slightly. "You know I don’t sleep too much”

He brushed a bit of hair from her face, his touch sending a shiver down her spine. "Spoiling me rotten, why don’t you?!" she teased, leaning up to kiss him softly.

The kiss deepened quickly, a familiar electric current running between them. He held her close, the iron forgotten on the ironing board. When they finally broke apart, both breathless, a comfortable silence settled around them.

"Alright, enough distractions." Lewis said with a playful grin, picking up the iron again. Y/n swatted him playfully on the arm. "Fine, fine. But at least let me make you some coffee."

"Make it strong, beautiful. Long day ahead." he said, winking.

Naps

The scent of Lewis's signature cologne hit Y/N as she fumbled with her key, the familiar aroma a warm welcome after a long day of meetings. She pushed open the door, a tired smile gracing her lips. Stepping inside, the apartment was the picture of disaster with luggage all around.

Curled up on the plush white sofa, Lewis lay fast asleep, his chest rising and falling gently. But he wasn't alone. Nestled beside him, Roscoe mirrored his position, a ball of contentment.

Y/N's heart melted. Lewis, notorious for his messy sleep schedule, must have been exhausted after the race. And clearly, Roscoe, ever the emotional sponge, had picked up on his human's need for rest.

She tiptoed closer, careful not to disturb their slumber. Lewis's face was relaxed, a hint of a smile playing on his lips. One hand lay unconsciously draped over Roscoe's back, who in turn let out a contented sigh in his sleep.

Unable to resist, Y/N pulled out her phone and snapped a picture, capturing the heartwarming tableau of man and dog united. A soft chuckle escaped her lips. Maybe unpacking could wait.

Just then, Lewis stirred, his eyes flickering open. He blinked blearily at her for a moment before a grin spread across his face.

"Hello gorgeous" he mumbled; his voice thick with sleep.

"Hey you" she replied, her voice soft. She gestured towards Roscoe, who was now blinking awake, his tail thumping a lazy greeting against the sofa cushion.

"Looks like someone else is happy you were back" Lewis observed, reaching out to scratch Roscoe behind the ear.

The dog whined happily, nuzzling into Lewis's hand.

"Well," she declared, sinking down onto the sofa beside them, "it seems you two had a relaxing afternoon."

Lewis chuckled, pulling her close. "We did," he admitted, his voice laced with sleepiness. "Until you arrived, photojournalist extraordinaire."

Y/N playfully swatted at his arm. "Hey, someone has to document the domestic bliss."

Lewis leaned in, his lips brushing against her ear. "Then perhaps," he murmured, "you should document some more."

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[momo-minomo]

Batfam Cooking/Eating Habits

I know that the fandom has, for some reason, settled on the idea that Alfred and Jason are the only Waynes that can cook and the rest are health disasters but honestly the comics doesn't really support that (with the exception of Bruce and maybe Cass lol) and I have serious doubts that Alfred would let ANY of his kids go through life without basic life skills. So based on comics and my own thoughts and feelings, here's how I figure everyone's kitchen skills would be.

Bruce: He follows a VERY strict diet to maintain his peak physical condition but will break it for special occasions or feeding his kids takeout on patrol. As for cooking, for the most part Bruce is an utter disaster in the kitchen. He's had Alfred by his side his entire life so most of the time his attempts at cooking went extremely badly, even if it was something as simple as a damn sandwich as Tim can attest to here:

After Alfred's death he does eventually learns to make a few specific, simple things really well like the omelette he made for Clark here. As you can see, though, he's still pretty helpless in the kitchen with anything beyond the very basics, even dishwashers lol

Dick: Our flippiest boy is not the hopeless cereal-addicted kitchen disaster that fandom assumes he is. In fact, Tim was surprised at how good Dick is with all the "domestic skills" like cleaning, laundry, and cooking. Dick has cooked multiple times in the comics, especially for dates or Tim. He is constantly trying to feed his baby brother in general so he's cooked him pasta and soup for sure and just showed up with takeout or donuts a bunch.

Jason: I love the headcanon that Jason is a foodie and a really good cook even though I admit there's not much evidence for it in the comics. No evidence against it, either. Jason definitely loves to eat good food and doesn't bother with a strict diet like Batman and he loves a good burger. Considering his past, though, I think it's very in character that he'd learn to cook really well from Alfred so he's always self-sufficient. Since I don't have any comic snapshots of him cooking, here's Jason's eternal love for burgers instead!

Tim: His relationship with food seems kind of complicated to me. Tim on his own will eat super healthy so he remains in top shape for the job. What we see him eating, though, are things like plain salads, kale chips, and scrambled egg whites. Considering his extremely active life he should be eating more protein and larger portions but he often leaves them unfinished. As a young Robin it didn't seem like he got fed much at home, either, since you see Dick trying to feed him at every opportunity and he was always hungry if Alfred or Dick offered to cook or buy food for him.

When Tim is with other people, the YJ crew, his friends, Dick, Spoiler, etc he's far more willing to eat. Dick pulls out donuts and Tim is rubbing his hands together in anticipation. Dick brought a thermos of soup on patrol for himself but immediately hands it to Tim when he shows up and Tim downs it. So my HC is that Tim will eat as a necessity but doesn't really like to do it by himself. He's a social eater. He'll spend an entire afternoon eating a boring but healthy meal because he has to but if a friend or sibling show up he'll happily eat a full meal with them and even junk food.

As for Tim and cooking, we actually know he can and is pretty good at it! In comics he's cooked with Dick, learned to make chicken soup with his stepmom Dana when Steph was sick. We also see in the comics that Tim has prepared a full breakfast spread for when Jason shows up to a pre-arranged meeting to ask for information. Jason asks if the waffles are Alfred's recipe (apparently Alfred's one culinary sin is paste-like waffles lol) and is happy to sit down and munch when Tim assures him they aren't. He's also made pancakes for Steph and the family after patrol, a father's day dinner for Bruce, and a cake for Bernard! So Tim is a really good cook that doesn't really bother for just himself much. He prefers to go all out cooking for other people.

Cass: I don't know as much about Cass as I do the others (I need to read her stuff soon!) but I know she has terrible table manners and likes to sneak into her siblings and close friends apartments to eat their food, use their showers, and sleep. She has her own place, but she much prefers the homes and food of her loved ones. She also apparently didn't even blink at Alfred breaking into her home to stock her shelves with food, do laundry, and clean lol. With this I figure Cass doesn't really cook at all and just does take out, easy to eat meals that can be eaten cold or microwaved, and mooching off her loved ones' cooking and pantries!

[engie-ivy]

1055 words

Gilderoy is convinced grocery store guy was flirting with him, but the truth is, the guy didn't even really notice him. His date on the other hand...

What Bad Dates Can Be Good For

“This is so embarrassing,” Gilderoy smiles, more smug than embarrassed, as he brushes back one of his blond curls. “I'm so sorry. I wish I could say it's an incident, but the truth is, this happens to me all the time. Even while I'm on a date with someone, guys just come up to me and start flirting with me. It's so awkward, but the story of my life, I'm afraid.”

Sirius frowns. “I don't think he was flirting with you.”

Gilderoy smirks. “There's no need to feel threatened, Siri. So far, my attention is still on you.”

Sirius cringes at the nickname. “I'm honestly not threatened,” he assures Gilderoy, and it's true. Their date isn't even halfway yet, but Sirius is already quite certain Gilderoy doesn't do it for him, and if his attention were to be on anyone else, Sirius couldn't care less.

It had started already while planning their date, and Gilderoy had insisted they could go to one of the fanciest restaurants in town without making a reservation, because ‘they know who I am’, of course leading to them not being able to get a table at that restaurant, or any other restaurant anymore on a busy Friday night. Gilderoy had pretended he preferred cooking himself anyways, but of course he didn't have anything edible in his kitchen, so they had to go to the grocery store first. Gilderoy then proceeded to fill their basket with unnecessary and expensive products like pistachio milk, gluten-free protein powder, hand-roasted kale chips and whatnot, probably trying to seem interesting, but only annoying Sirius, and letting him pay for everything on top of that.

Now, having just stepped out of the grocery store, Gilderoy is convinced the employee there had been flirting with him.

“I just truly don't think he was flirting with you,” Sirius says.

Gilderoy rolls his eyes. “Then why did he come up to talk to me?”

“He wanted to restock the shelves, and you were in the way,” Sirius replies matter of factly.

Gilderoy lets out a deep sigh, like he can't believe how dumb Sirius is being. “He was clearly only using that as an excuse to talk to me.” He then smiles at Sirius in a way that feels belittling. “You don't have to be so jealous, you know.”

Sirius doesn't know how to make it any more clear. “Not threatened, not jealous, just disagreeing, Gilderoy.”

“Let's ask him then.”

Sirius blinks. “What?”

“Grocery store guy. Let's go back and ask him, so he can confirm that he was in fact flirting with me.” Gilderoy turns around and starts walking back towards the store.

“Oh, for the love of-” Sirius walks after him. “Gilderoy, let him be! I believe you, okay? He was totally flirting with you! Just leave the poor guy alone!”

“Oh, hello.” Grocery store guy is now standing behind the counter and smiles at Sirius as they enter the store, and Sirius can't help but notice the sight of the soft smile in combination with his freckles. Oh, he thinks as realization dawns. He's cute.

“Hi,” Gilderoy says, before Sirius can say anything. “Would you mind clearing something up for us, and tell my date you were just flirting with me?”

Sirius cringes, torn between trying to look as apologetic as possible and attempting to be as invisible as possible.

“I…” The guy blinks at Gilderoy. “Am sorry?”

Gilderoy lets out a laugh. “No need to be embarrassed. You're not the first and you won't be the last.”

The guy frowns as he stares at Gilderoy. “Am I supposed to know you?”

Gilderoy’s arrogant persona falters for a moment as he looks taken aback. “Well, not know me, but you've seen me.”

The guy shakes his head. “I really don't recall having ever seen you before.”

“You… What… How…” Gilderoy sputters, as Sirius has to bite the inside of his cheek not to laugh.

“Sorry, mate.” The guy shrugs.

"Bollocks!" Gilderoy bristles, his face turning red. “You're trying to mess with me!”

The guy tilts his head, calmly studying Gilderoy. “There's just a lot of people coming in and out of the store all day. Hard to remember who I've seen.”

“I am not hard to remember!” Gilderoy bites at him.

The guy holds up his hands, but his expression betrays his amusement with Gilderoy’s reaction, whose face is now bright red. “No offense.”

“Whatever,” Gilderoy snaps. “Keep telling that to yourself.” He turns on his heels and stalks out of the store.

“I am so sorry about him,” Sirius says, feeling like he has to say something.

“I'm sorry for you,” the guy replies. “You're the one who's dating him.” He almost shudders at the thought.

“It's a first date,” Sirius quickly replies. “I've literally only met him two hours ago.” He doesn't know why he feels the need to clear that up (okay, maybe he does know, and it has something to do with big, amber eyes staring up at him).

“Is that so?” The guy says, leaning forward over the counter. “And what are his chances of getting a second date?”

Sirius huffs. “Let me say it like this, if he were the last single gay guy in town, I would start dating women, and I'm actually very, very gay.”

The guy chuckles. “Well, not to worry. I happen to know for a fact that he's not the last single gay guy in town,” he says, looking up at Sirius through his lashes.

“That's…” Sirius scrapes his throat. “That's good to know.” Then he can't help but ask. “Did you really not remember him? Or were you just messing with his too-big-head?”

“I honestly did not,” The guy says, and then he gives Sirius a meaningful smile. “After all, how could I've noticed anyone else when you were right there?”

Sirius can feel himself blush, but before he can scramble his brain together enough to come up with an of course very smooth and witty reply, Gilderoy appears in the door.

“Are you done here? I'm hungry.”

“Thank you very much, sir,” the guy says, in a suddenly professional voice. “Here's your receipt.”

Sirius takes the receipt, and since he did not buy anything, he's not entirely surprised, yet entirely pleased, to see a phone number scribbled down on the piece of paper.

[fishfooddude]

I Hate New York.

Part 3 of the Would you still love me if I was a worm? series

MDNI 18+

The Bear Masterlist

Directory

Part 2

“So she’s keeping the baby… and you’re moving in together… in New York?” Natalie asked slowly, trying to make sense of the info dump Carmy had given everyone at The Bear during family service that evening. Carmy nodded; he’d had this stupid love-struck smile plastered on his face since you had your conversation a few weeks ago. 

“Yeah, she got this big promotion. I’m proud of her and wanna be with her and my kid, so we’re going to New York next week,” Carmy confirmed. Natalie wanted to be happy for you and Carmy, but she had this gut feeling that something would happen. She didn’t know how to explain it, but since becoming a mother herself, she could just sense when something would go down. 

“I’m just- I’m just worried, Carmy. You two are moving fast. I just want to ensure you’re sure you want this.” Carmy shook his head at Natalie’s words. Ever since the two of you had decided to keep the baby and move in together- in New York, everyone seemed to share the opinion of the two of you moving ‘too quickly.’

“Sugar, I’m happy. Like- really happy. I never thought I’d have this… I love Y/N, and I know we haven’t been together all that long, but this feels right.” Carmy explained as he leaned against the wall of Natalie’s kitchen. She sighed in reply, but before she could say anything, cries came from the baby monitor. “Saved by the cryin’ baby.”

Natalie laughed, “Well, since you’re so ready to be a Dad, why don’t you go check on your niece?”

~

“Okay, here we have oven-roasted sweet potatoes with sauteed corn and squash. Then there's a kale salad with pumpkin seeds and lentils-” 

“Carmy, I swear to god. You need to stop making me eat all these damn vegetables,” you whined as you slumped back on the couch. You heard him chuckle from the kitchen before joining you. Carmy squeezed your knee and stomped your feet as you pushed your hands through your hair. Carmy heartily laughed and leaned over to gently kiss your ever-growing baby bump. 

“My love, I want that baby to come out all happy and healthy. You’re doin’ all the work in growin’ the baby and keepin’ her all safe and cozy- feeding you everything that little girl needs to be all nice and healthy is all I can do.” Carmy cooed as he rubbed soft, slow circles against your bump and lovingly gazed up at you. You laughed and pushed his hair out of his face.

“Let me eat a freakin’ donut. And some hot chips.” you groaned, “I am a hard-workin’ lady, and I can’t have a damn glass of wine or go to the Coral Omakase dinner my boss is throwing… don’t make me eat more vegetables.” Carmy laughed at your explanation and rested his cheek on your bump. You glared at him and pouted, “Are you really going to deny your pregnant girlfriend a donut? …And maybe some Sour Patch Kids…” 

“I just want you and our baby girl to be healthy. All the books-”

“Carmy, I just want one donut.” you pleaded, giving him your best puppy dog expression. 

Carmy groaned and moved to bury his face in your cleavage. “She’s gonna be able to do that too, huh? That look? She’s gonna have me wrapped around her little finger.”

You laughed and glanced at the clock, “I gotta go, babe. Thank you for making me lunch- even if it’s 90% vegetables.” Carmy rolled his eyes as he helped you get up from the couch. “Only a couple more weeks until you don’t have to help me up from the couch.” 

“Well, in six weeks, I’ll be helpin’ ya with other stuff.” Carmy added before kissing your cheek, “Have a good day, and make sure you drink enough water.”

“You got it, Dr. Berzatto, my unofficial OBGYN.” you saluted and gave him a short side hug. Carmy laughed, and you walked out of the living room. He watched as you grabbed your bag from the floor and your lunch box from the counter. “I love you. See you tonight.” you smiled as you exited the apartment.

“Bye, baby,” Carmy called as he shoved his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants. He rocked on his heels before walking into the kitchen to do the dishes. Carmy had a routine since the two of you moved to New York. He did what he could for The Bear, mostly ordering and menu ideas. It never felt like enough, but Carmy couldn’t work at a New York restaurant again with the baby on the way. He was anxious enough about his impending paternity to ever work in a New York kitchen again; the idea of it made his ulcers flair up.

Carmy spent his days reading books about pregnancy and parenting. He became a regular at the local bookshop and library, getting his hands on everything he could. Being a Dad was unknown territory to him, and he didn’t have many fond memories of his father. He remembered overhearing his mom and dad fighting before his dad left and inevitably got arrested. Uncle Jimmy and Mikey were the closet things he’d had to a father figure, and with Mikey being gone, Uncle Jimmy was the best he could, and there was still a certain level of difficulty for the emotional side of ‘father figuring’ that Jimmy couldn’t fulfill for Carmy. 

Carmy refused to let that cycle continue. Although he didn’t always understand his emotions, he was trying to do better for his daughter. That afternoon, after doing the laundry, he decided to tackle the last few things he needed to do in the nursery.

Soft pastel yellow walls were still bare, furniture needed to be assembled, and things needed to be organized. Walking into the nursery always brought a wave of peace over Carmy. Sweet stuffed animals sat on a shelf by the window with a collection of children's books and a basket of other baby needs. The box containing the crib leaned against the wall, along with a collection of paintings Carmy had done but hadn’t hung yet. In the corner was a vintage rocking chair the two of you had found at a flea market when you’d first moved. Carmy stood in the center of the room and couldn’t help but smile. 

~

“Hey, I’m home,” you called as you entered the apartment that evening. “Carm?” you called when you saw he wasn’t in the living room or kitchen. You walked down the hall and saw the nursery door was askew. “Carm?” you asked as you nudged the door open. 

“Oh my god.” you gasped as you saw the completed nursery before you, “You- Carmy.”

He looked over his shoulder and shot you a smile, “Hi, baby.” 

“You finished the nursery?” 

He nodded in response, “You like it, baby? I can change-”

“Carmy, I love it.” you cut him off as you fully entered the nursery. As you looked around the room, noticing all the small details, you’d absentmindedly started rubbing your bump. Carmy smiled and got up from the floor, placing his hands over yours after closing the small gap between you. You smiled up at him, “Thank you, Carmy.”

Carmy shrugged, “I just wanna be a good dad.”

“You are.” you smiled as you tip-toed up to kiss his nose. Carmy chuckled and shifted his hands from yours and around your sides to rest on your lower back. He laced his fingers together before pulling you as close as your bump allowed. 

“I just wanna be different.” Carmy sighed, “My Dad wasn’t around much… people haven’t been the most supportive of all this, but I wanna be good for her.” Carmy put his chin on your shoulder as he spoke. “I want her to feel safe and loved… wanted.”

You wrapped your arms around Carmy’s neck as he spoke, “She will, Carm. She will.”

~~

“You’re gorgeous.” Carmy complimented as he leaned against the bathroom doorframe. You rolled your eyes and continued curling your hair. He clicked his tongue and entered the bathroom, “Hey, you are.” 

You giggled as Carmy hopped onto the bathroom counter and leaned against the mirror with his arms folded across his chest as he lovingly watched you. “You’re just sayin’ that. I’m freakin’ huge.” 

“Yeah. With MY baby…” Carmy smirked as his eyes roamed your body. You felt a blush coming over your face as you shook your head. He chuckled and watched you finish your hair. As you unplugged your curling wand, he hopped down from the counter and came up behind you. You smiled at him in the mirror as he rested his chin on your shoulder and rubbed your bump through your oversized t-shirt. “Pregnant with my baby…” he muttered as he turned his head to nip at your neck. 

“Carmy…” you giggled, “I gotta go to work…”

“Be late…” he snickered as he trailed kisses up your neck to the pulse point below your ear. You bit your lip at the feeling of his teeth graze over the sensitive skin. “Let me take care of you… you’re so fuckin’ sensitive; I’ll make you cum fast.”

You leaned against Carmy’s body and let your head fall to the side, giving him more access to your neck. Carmy left a trail of gentle, wet kisses on your neck before turning you in his arms and kissing your lips. A whiny moan escaped your throat as Carmy’s hands traveled down your back. He took the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth as his hands slid over your butt and hooked under your thighs. You squealed as Carmy lifted you onto the bathroom counter. He chuckled and broke the kiss, leaving you desperate for more, “You are incredible.” he smiled, running a thumb over his cheekbone.

Carmy looked at you as he moved his hands to your knees and slowly spread them as he lustfully gazed into your eyes, making you melt. His hands traveled up your thighs toward your hips. As he hooked his thumbs in the band of your sleep shorts, you felt a tingle surge through your body. You leaned back on your palms and lifted your hips, making it easier for Carmy to pull them down. After dropping the shorts on the floor, Carmy’s hands were back on your hips. He gently pulled you to the edge of the counter, giving him easier access to your exposed pussy. You felt your cheek get hot as he sank to his knees. 

“What baby? You nervous?” he chuckled as he stared up at you. You shook your head and bit your lip, “Then what is it?” he asked as he softly kissed your inner thigh. Your body jolted at the sudden sensation, making Carmy smirk against your skin before placing another kiss higher than the last. 

“I haven’t-” You paused your sentence with a soft whine as Carmy pushed your thighs farther apart and kissed higher. “I haven’t shaved in a while…” 

Carmy shook his head as his lips finally reached your center, “I don’t care, baby.” he spoke softly. Before you could protest, he kissed your lips, making you twitch. Carmy inhaled your scent as he slowly ran his tongue up the length of your core, flicking his tongue when he reached your clit. You moaned softly and struggled to look over your bump to watch as Carmy devoured your core.

~

“Carmy!” you gasped, sitting up suddenly in bed that evening. He shifted half-asleep, mumbling something you couldn’t quite make out. “Carmy!” you urged, smacking his shoulder, causing him to shoot up.

“Is the baby coming?” he scrambled to find the switch on his bedside table as he spoke. As light filled the room, he saw you protectively holding your bump. “Baby? What’s wrong?” he worried.

“Somethings wrong…”

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

I bet Miguel can cook REALLY well.

Like CRAZY WELL.

Being a dad he did have to come up with something to eat for dinner every night

And with Gabriella being a bit picky, sometimes he had to get creative

And some of his favorite memories are the conversations he and Gabbie had while dinner was on the stove

But even now, he loves it. Miguel finds he act of cooking so relaxing. He likes the peace and the order of it

And even if he comes in really really late from HQ - he'll still try and cook something

Fighting sleep while cooking a quesadilla on the stove

He's a Sazon loyalist SORRY ADOBO STANS

There's always tortillas, sour cream and salsa verde in his fridge - freshly made

(if you got those you can figure something out)

And he grows his own cilantro and basil on the window sill

And he'll never use powdered garlic, only fresh

Yes he can eat garlic - yes people on campus ask him that a lot

(he's hot ACTUALLY a vampire)

His seafood is TO DIE FOR

Miguel can make amazing lobster tail, or crab legs (with Old Bay and butter of course)

And his Ceviche is SO GOOD and SO FRESH

Most likely makes everything spicy. It's not even that he 'loves' spicy food - He just makes it spicy AF and acts like he doesn't notice

MEANWHILE you're next to him and it hurts to breathe

He and Hobie are bean stans.

Miguel loves them in Chilli con Carne, with rice, refried, you name it

and Hobie goes through those British blue cans of Heinz baked beans like it's nobodies business

They both think beans are underrated

Makes AMAZING MOLE and even better Tamales

But you have to BEG him for weeks on end to get him to make Tamales cause he can't be bothered - and he will make you help

He likes Avocado, like in general. On toast, with eggs, guacamole use always a staple

He'll often just eat chips and guacamole the whole day in his office and he'll get pissed if the food court is out of it.

Well look at a corn shell ground beef taco and be like 'You think that's a taco? Is that what you honestly believe?'

Loves cooking with other people - in fact Miguel actually just likes working with people in general. That's why Lyla has a personality.

He's good at guiding others during cooking and teaching them things and not bossing them around

OBSESSED LIKE CONCERNINGLY SO

With mango and Tajin

He'll put Tajin seasoning on ANYTHING - the first time Jess saw him put it on watermelon she was like 'what for????'

But he loves fruit in general, watermelon, lychee, guava. A lot of them are grown fresh in the Society gardens

Strawberries are a favorite of his. Gabriella loved strawberries on pancakes

He pronounces lychee - Leechee (not Lie-chee)

He's the fucking PRO at protein shakes and milkshakes

The man needs workout fuel and whey powder and kale and potassium and-

He's in the kitchen 5am getting ready for the gym

Making a shit ton of peanut butter strawberry banana and oats protein smoothie with coconut milk and honey to sweeten

Because he does have a sweet tooth.

Jolly Ranchers are an oral fixation

You can hear him sucking on one, the quiet clacking of it.

Or see him press it into his cheek, lost in thought

But baking and sweets are his secret love

He just doesn't have anyone to test it on anymore - so he doesn't

His flan is the best, and it was one of Gabbie's show faves

He eats parfaits pretty often, and makes them a lot for Jess (and she teases it for it)

Miguel LOVES tres leches cake, as sweet as possible. And fancy stuff like creme brulee

Don't tell anyone but he actually really likes cheesecake he acts like it's a secret

With him cooking get ready for the most sugariest breakfast ever. It's a dad thing.

Whipped cream, fruits, syrup, chocolate chips, you name it.

Sure Miguel shouldn't have been giving Gabriella THAT much sugar THAT early - but with you it's fine so enjoy the stomach ache in two hours

Another dad thing:

COOK OUT FOOD.

Him and Peter get INTENSE.

Miguel swears by charcoal grills, Peter likes propane and gas

Miguel is the tio with the best Hot dogs and relish that HITS

Peter is the burger dad who spends an insane amount of money on Angus beef

Miguel judges your hot dog toppings but says nothing

His ELOTE???? EUPHORIC

Like,,, it'll bring you to tears it's so good - I don't know how he does it

And when it comes to cooking he's ALWAYS willing to learn

He'd rather invite you over and cook you something than going out to eat

He'll learn something you like or where you're from and make something from there

Even better if you can teach him how to make something - the two of you can make it together

But his favorite part by far is setting it down at the table, trying not to seem like he's watching your reaction

And seeing your face light up at the first bite

Or even better -

Seeing you collapse into bed with a food coma

Miguel with cooking and food as a love language

[kalembappe]

heyyyy! i love cry baby, it’s the most amazing haaland story on tumblr 💘

this is the ask that pushed me to finishing

[thisiswhatmentallyhealthyfolksdo]

bunny girl diet

(inspired by @honey-diet )

guidelines

bunny are fast, and they are active. they love to run around and play! exercise in whatever way is most fun for you. some ideas might be playing a movement based, learning a tiktok dance, going for a walk in the park or around the mall, or playing a sport.

veggies are the ultimate treat! eat as many veggies as you can get your paws on!

bunnies are always doing something new, or getting into trouble. when someone asks if you want to go out, of course you do! you try new events and get out to see new things! say yes to anything someone asks you to try!

bunny don't eat meat, and while on this diet neither should you. stick to a vegan diet, if you don't want to upset your stomach

being cute is you biggest asset, because that how you get people to give you another carrot! make sure you do what you can to be as cute as possible, in hopes you might sneak and extra snack

diet

bunnies eat a lot, and all most of it is veggies. they tend to graze through the day on a lot of snacks rather then one big one meal, so spread out your food throughout the days.

mix and match lots of snacks to make a day's worth of food. here are some ideas to get you started

baby carrots

a big salad with lots of add ins

kimchi and rice

kale stri fry

broccoli

mint water

cabbage soup

apples

sauteed bok choy

cucumber and strawberry salad

Zucchini

spaghetti squash pasta

whole dandelions

a green smoothie

water melon

collard greens

minestrone soup

apple sauce

roasted brussel sprouts

kale/spinach chips

peach