#like what the fuck is wrong with me just man up and die
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The VIP Booth | Vander Smut Oneshot 🫗🤎
(Gif creds: me <3)
Pairings: Husband!Vander x Wife!Reader
Pronouns: Fem!Pronouns
Rating: NSFW, 18+, MDNI !! You WILL be blocked! 🤺
Word Count: 3.1k (whoops. got carried away with storybuilding)
Tags: Cunnilingus, Fingering, Face Fucking, Finger Sucking, Hair Pulling, Semi-Public Sexual Acts, Established Relationship, etc.
Summary: You coax your husband into eating you out in the only private area The Last Drop has to offer.
Notes: AAAA!! Idk if this idea is ANY GOOD but it came to me in a moment of delusion. The last bit was probably a little rushed, too. SORRYYYY. I’ll make it up to yall later.
Also, tell me I’m wrong when I say that Vander will go to any length to eat some pussy. Do it, cowards. I dare you. YOU KNOW JUST AS WELL AS I DO THAT THIS MAN WOULD HAPPILY DIE WITH HIS FACE IN BETWEEN A PAIR OF THIGHS.
Asks/Request fics are coming soon, as well as a few more special treats for y’all!! Enjoy, my lovelies, & stay tuned. 🤍
(I can see you, minors!! Get outta here 🤺🤺. BACK! BACK, I SAY!)
Inside the walls of The Last Drop, there was one booth unlike any other—a private, exclusive spot tucked away behind the bustling central room. It was a booth reserved for those willing to pay for top-tier service, offering a secluded escape from the usual chaos of the bar’s environment. But as co-owner of The Last Drop—and wife to the main owner—you didn’t need to fork out any cash to reserve it. Especially not on a night like this. No—tonight, luck was on your side. The booth had gone unclaimed by any paying customer.
Truthfully, the undeniably significant feature were its curtains. The enormous maroon tapestries that enveloped the entrance ensured complete privacy, shielding it from prying eyes. After all, that’s what made it the VIP booth—an oasis of solitude amidst the drunken chaos of the crowd.
With the booth left unreserved, its privacy ensuring a rare moment of seclusion, and the crowd blissfully distracted by their own drunken revelry, the opportunity was simply too perfect to pass up. You had concocted a devilish plan—one that had been simmering in your mind all night. It wasn’t just about messing with your husband—it was about messing around with him.
Your overwhelming desire for your husband was impossible to ignore on any given day, but tonight, it seemed even more intense—an insatiable hunger that gnawed at you, its cause elusive and beyond your comprehension. Whatever the reason, it gripped you with a force you couldn't obstruct, leaving you restless and consumed by pure unadulterated lust.
This, naturally, allowed your plan to unfold effortlessly, as if guided by an invisible hand, bringing it closer to fruition.
To carry out your devious plan, you had carefully cultivated the trust of one of the few individuals who worked for you and Vander. They weren’t exactly employees in the traditional sense, but rather a handful of people you kept on the fringes, offering a few coins in exchange for their occasional assistance. Their loyalty was fleeting, bought with small tokens, but it was enough to serve your purpose. Especially in a moment such as this. A seemingly crucial one—at that.
You kept things vague, framing your request as though it were purely concerning a business discussion needing to be had. You asked your employee to discreetly inform your husband that someone was calling him from behind the velvet curtains of the VIP booth. You also made it clear that the employee should mirror your discretion, avoiding any mention of your name or your connection to him.
The employee appeared curious, even somewhat uneasy, at first. That was, however, prior to you slipping a generous cash bonus their way, eliciting their cooperation without room for protest.
"Go on, please," you plead with your unsuspecting employee, your voice laced with a blend of urgency and excitement. "But remember—don’t tell him it’s me."
As the employee slips into the bustling crowd, you struggle to contain the surge of excitement building within you, all while fighting to maintain a sultry—yet composed, demeanor. You adjust your hair, breasts, and clothing, making subtle moves to enhance your allure and mystery. Every gesture is deliberate, designed to keep you as collected and captivating as possible, cultivating an air of intrigue about you as you desperately await the arrival of your beloved husband.
They fulfilled your agreement as you waited—approaching their boss and informing him that someone had entered the VIP booth, insisting on speaking with him directly.
"VIP booth? Thought nobody booked it tonight," Vander remarks, raising an eyebrow and crossing his arms over his chest as he takes a moment to process the information. Normally, you were the one who handled the VIP booth, and he’d have gladly passed this task off to you—if the employee hadn’t mentioned that the VIP “customer” specifically requested Vander. Looks like he’d have to put on a more hospitable facade and give them what they wanted.
If only he knew just what this "customer" truly wanted from him.
After a series of grunts, groans, and huffs, Vander finally made his way to the booth. After forcing a welcoming smile onto his face, he slowly pushed aside the curtains.
"Sorry for the wait. You wanted to speak to the owner—"
His voice faltered, trailing off faster than it had taken him to summon the words.
You feel your own response threaten to catch in your throat, but you won’t cave. You abandon your nerves.
"Why yes, I did. Although..." you drawl, your tone laced with playful mischief, "...'speak' isn’t exactly at the top of the list of things I want to do to the owner."
Your sultry gaze locks onto his, deliciously teasing. Vander, already an imposing figure, looms even larger from your vantage point in the booth. Seated as you are, you find yourself craning your neck significantly just to meet his eyes, the angle only amplifying his commanding presence.
A slew of unidentifiable emotions cross his face in a mere flash before fading into a singularly—equally mischievous to yours—-expression.
“Well. Seein’ as how you are the VIP patron of the night, how can I oblige you?” He queries, his eyebrow raising once more.
Your heart stutters beneath your breast as his expression shifts, his eyes darkening with a lust-filled intensity that sends a shiver through you. The chemistry between you two never failing to baffle you.
"...Serve me," you murmur, your voice soft yet determined to keep the air thick with seduction.
"And what, if I may be so bold to ask, can I serve you with?" he inquires, his voice dipping low, the provocative edge in his gaze unwavering.
"Your body." you quip, your voice steady despite the flutter of nerves stirring in your gut, desperate to make it quiver.
Vander eyes you carefully for a moment, savoring the way your confidence wavers. He deliberately toys with the knowledge of how easily he can unsettle you, his gaze lingering as if relishing every flicker of hesitation you try to hide. A smirk slowly spreads across his mouth—the very one you ached for—his eyes glinting with an all-knowing, deviously sexy twinge. He nods softly, his hand rising to casually caress his beard as he watches you, the tension thick in the air.
“Mmhmm. I see," he murmurs, his tone laced with teasing amusement. "Who am I, if not a man willing to care for his loyal customers?" He phrases simply, the words carrying a heavy, unspoken promise before he moves, gracefully lowering himself to his knees across from you. There’s a moment of silence, the air thick with anticipation, before he slowly begins to push himself beneath the table that had kept you both apart.
You don’t dare look beneath the table, almost afraid to meet his gaze at this moment, unsure of what you might see on his face now that the situation has shifted. The tension coils tighter, each passing second amplifying the anticipation that overwhelmed your senses.
You practically jump at the brush of his shoulders against your shins as he crawls to them, the rush of anticipation making every nerve in your body jolt. The aching desperation pulling through you draws attention to your core as you feel his strong hands gently caress your legs, the heat of his touch settling on your knees, sending a shiver through you. The way your teeth begin to tug at your bottom lip seemed like the only way you could physically process your eagerness.
Vander remains silent, his hands moving deliberately in opposite directions, the gesture designed to spread your legs—yet he did so with enough force to split you down the middle if he hadn’t been careful enough. It isn’t until he successfully parts them that he speaks again.
“No bottoms? My. What a dirty girl you are, my dear customer. What if someone else had walked in here, hmm? Did you plan on flashing your bits to any bloke who popped his head in?” He teases, practically groaning some of his words, the guttural tone an unintentional yet instinctual reaction to the sight of you so bare—-so clearly prepared for whatever scenario it was you anticipated happening in this little corner of the establishment.
It was obvious to your husband, from the way you were reacting, that the possibility of him crawling under the table to bury his face between your thighs hadn’t even crossed your mind. The surprise and hesitation in your twitches and subtle movements told him everything he needed to know.
The distant, familiar chatter of real customers beyond the thin barrier tightened the knot in your stomach, throwing you into the reality of the moment. It became an unrelenting presence, grounding you in the tension that hung in the air. Meanwhile, the hot, damp breath of your husband seethed against the cold slickness seeping from your cunt, a stark contrast that deepened the unease coursing through you.
A shiver ran up your spine, your body trembling as nervous spasms raked through your bones when he edged even closer—his hair grazing your skin in that familiar way you knew so well. It wasn’t uncommon for your husband to spend most of his time down here, yet no matter how often it happened, the anxiety it stirred within you never waned.
You had an even harder time controlling how your body writhed as you felt the warmth of his tongue flush itself against your sopping heat. Your nails pressed into the soft wood of the table, digging in as you braced yourself, your body jerking. The spasms faltered for a moment, your body going rigid once he started violently lapping his tongue against your aching clit. The abrasing way his beard rubbed against the skin of your thighs sent you into a spiral.
You had expected him to fuck you directly on the table, to take you in the way you were used to—but instead, he toyed with you from beneath it, the unanticipated choice leaving you bewildered. You had been aching for what felt like ages, the desperation almost unbearable. It was a struggle to keep your mouth from parting—your head tilting back, eyes closing as your husband began to ease the tension that had gripped you for so long.
All you wanted was to whimper, to cry out for him, but you couldn’t���not with the patrons so close, just beyond the curtains. If he had only fucked you as you’d expected, he would’ve easily pressed a hand over your mouth to keep you quiet, as he had in similar situations before. But this time, you knew he had chosen this path deliberately, testing whether you could hold your composure.
It was his unspoken way of making you atone for the ploy you used to get him here. He was a patient lover, understanding that even though you had pulled him away from his work—which he didn’t mind as much as he let on—you were just too eager to be patient. Always attuned to your needs, he was more than willing to satisfy the cravings of his most cherished wife, finding joy in fulfilling your desires—no matter the time or place. The absence of his familiar presence behind the bar, and the slight potential for upsetting customers, felt like a small price to pay in exchange for the chance to fully indulge in you. To unravel and claim you in ways only he could.
His tongue was relentless. He sloppily sucked and licked at your needy clit, his nose rubbing against the mound of flesh above as he devoured you. His hands were as equally hungry as his mouth, and in need of something to grab. He manhandles your legs, draping them roughly over his shoulders, his fingers gripping at your plush thighs as he curls his arms around them. In doing so, he pulled you closer, your back slipping against the booth as he guided you down, drawing you nearer to him with a purposeful force. His cock was begging to be set free from its cloth prison as he sunk his tongue deep into the void of your cunt. The rhythmic, wet sounds became a melody more captivating than any song he'd ever heard, especially when paired with the soft mewls of you struggling to stay collected—and most importantly—silent.
You can both hear and feel his laugh against you, a deep, low chuckle that carries a mix of arousal and amusement, vibrating through you with every huff. He found the way he could make you squirm incredibly sexy, the reaction sparking a deep sense of pride within him. There was something about the ease with which he could unsettle you that thrilled him, and he took great satisfaction in knowing how little effort it took. He knew all too well that it only took something as simple as a certain look to have you coming undone—and right now, he was determined to make you come undone. All over his tongue.
Vander knows just how wild his fingers can make you on their own— yet especially so when paired with the mastery of his expertly quick and thoughtful tongue.
He wasted no time in combining the two, intent on making you crack under the pressure. While Vander didn’t particularly want to be caught by patrons, either—or, for that matter, by one of your employees—his desire to make you scream was always his top priority.
He grips your thighs with more gusto than before, continuing to pull them further apart in hopes of expanding his ‘workspace’. He releases one of them, the fingers of that hand moving to replace the tongue that was working its familiar magic inside you. He doesn’t give you so much as a single moment to collect your thoughts as he makes the exchange, effortlessly ramming and curling two up into your cunt as his tongue continues its prior attack on your clit.
You swore you were seeing stars behind your eyelids, your grip on the table faltering just like your efforts to stay in control. You couldn't even attempt to cover your mouth, not with the relentless—yet unintentional—way your hands found their way under the table, tangling in his hair and gripping with enough force to pull some strands loose.
You greedily buck your hips down to meet the thrusting of his digits, pulling his head as far into your cunt as possible. He doesn’t complain. He never would. Maybe it was his own type of preferred masochism, but he’d consider suffocating and perishing in between your legs in this way, a noble death.
Your toes ache from the force with which you’re curling them, your legs clutching and winding around his shoulders and neck like a python.
By now, you had abandoned all caution, hope, and effort to moan quietly. You were practically screaming over the deliciously knowing way he prodded his thick fingers into your cunt. He had long forgotten to move them in and out. He knew exactly what spot drove you mad, and he made his most conscious effort to curl them into it as rapidly and frequently as possible.
As much as Vander adored your cries, they were truly becoming far too loud. He really didn’t want any curious folks to come wandering in to spoil the moment when you were so close to your inevitable peak. He has no choice but to silence you. With the hand that remained on your other thigh, he removed it from its resting place, reaching up from beneath the table as he gazes up at you. With a smirk against your cunt, and his eyes studying how your head was still thrown back against the booth, eyes shut tighter than a steel trap—-he shoves two of his free fingers into your mouth. Your eyes shoot open. You look down at him, earning a wink from your husband as he smirks harder against your cunt. The eye contact was filthy, in the most erotic way possible. It always made you feel slightly awkward, in an oddly arousing way, when you made such a type of contact with him in the heat of a moment like this.
You willingly sucked on his fingers, now understanding the purpose for his actions after a thoughtful moment. He groans against your cunt, luckily the sound being muffled by how much his mouth was buried into it. Your tongue swirls itself rapaciously around the digits, drool falling from your mouth as you did so. Vander simply can’t tear his eyes away from such a sight. He groans more as you lower your own gaze, your expression deadly with seduction. He was almost pissy that both of his hands were occupied at the moment. He was anxious to palm at his cock, desperate to find friction of his own now.
His tongue and lips were still working their relentless job on your clit, suckling every few seconds amidst the slurping. The way his facial hair brushes against it every now and then almost sends you into hysterics—bordering on a full blown frenzy.
Your legs are quaking, twitching and spasming with every harsh lick to your clit. It was so sensitive, you couldn’t help how it shocked your nerves, causing them all to fire simultaneously. Electricity burned in your veins, desperate to chase your orgasm as it made your hips flick against his mouth faster than he could lap at you.
Your orgasm burrowed itself into the pit of your stomach, commanding you to follow it down to your cunt.
It didn’t take much longer for you to keel over the edge of your impending climax. It burst through you, your legs clamping shut around his face—a move which Vander was used to by now—-hips mindlessly gyrating against his face as you brutally cum around his fingers. Vander can feel your walls clenching and relaxing back to back with each additional thrust he gave, your voice begging to slip past his fingers as you come undone. He thought you had been dripping wet at the start of this—but he had been sorely mistaken. Your arousal was seeping out of you despite his fingers plugging you up.
“Attagirl..” He whispers against you, giving your clit a few final licks before reluctantly pulling away. The grip on his hair finally loosened as your body went almost completely limp. Your breathing came in rapid, shallow gasps, just as desperate as Vander, himself, now was. His cock was so hard, it felt like it was being choked by his trousers. But he had the patience of a saint. He could wait as long as needed for you to collect yourself once again.
“So, was the service to your liking?” he asks, his tone teasing—and entirely rhetorical—as he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. The fingers that had been in your mouth slide free as he takes a moment to compose himself.
“I’ll take that as a yes,” he chuckles, clearly amused by how speechless you’ve become.
“Just don’t forget to tip your server..” He teases, alluding to the painfully obvious fact, that this situation is far from over.
#arcane smut#arcane x reader#arcane#vander x reader#arcane imagine#arcane x reader smut#vander arcane#vander x reader arcane#vander x reader smut#Vander smut#Vander smut imagine#Vander x reader imagine smut#Vander smut Drabble#Vander x reader smut oneshot
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― YOU'RE JUST A STRANGER s.jaeyun
PAIRING. fem!reader x nonidol bf!jake CONTENT. angst , jake is kind-of a jerk (╥﹏╥) , breakup , cursing WORD COUNT. 1,281 NOTE. omg i've wanted to write an angsty fic for awhile so this is me finally doing it :3 the plot is kinda ass so i apologize T v T pls remember this is all just fiction !! hope you enjoy ♡
You were convinced that Jake was the best boyfriend anyone could ever have. He was insanely good-looking, dressed well, loved his family and friends, and had a loving personality. Jake always made time for you and never went a day without checking up on you. He even told you that he would marry you one day and that you guys would have three kids and one dog. Frankly, he was really just perfect.
Well, until he wasn't.
When you first met Jake, you guys were sophomores in highschool. You guys had met in your science class and ended up becoming close friends. After growing closer to him, you realized you had some pretty strong feelings for him. And surely enough, he felt the same way about you, too.
So in Junior year, he confessed to you and of course you said yes. How could you not? Throughout the next year, you felt as if life couldn't be any better. Your first love also loved you, and he was also possibly the most charming man on earth!
However, things quickly changed.
Fast forward a year and a half later, you guys graduated and quickly moved in together. But Jake was no longer the same. He was no longer the sweet boy that showed his love and affection for you. Instead, he was closed off. He never started conversations with you, you always had to be the one to start it. Jake was just becoming more distant.
Why? Why was your own boyfriend distancing himself from you? Did you do something wrong?
It was now 7:40 pm and Jake had still not answered your texts. Jake always answered, or well- he used to always answer.
baby i'm omw to the grocery store and i'll make us some dinner tonight <3
jake i just saw a dog that looks so much like layla lol
jake?? i haven't heard from you since you left this morning, r u okay?
i'm not trying to bother u jake but i'm rly worried pls atleast txt me back :(
You didn't know what to think. Was he ignoring you on purpose? Did you accidentally make a mistake? Was he falling out of love with you? Was he cheating on you?
No way, he couldn't. Yes he had been distant, but no, Jake would never. You wish he could just give you an explanation, at least.
You were just about to call him until you heard footsteps entering the apartment.
Jake's finally home.
You walk over to Jake and worryingly bombard him with questions while hugging him.
"baby...how're you? where were you today? did your phone die-"
He cuts you off.
"quit being so fucking nosey y/n." he says, sounding pissed off.
What? Did you just hear that right? And why did he sound and look so mad?
"jake...what? I was just worried..." you tell him, your voice laced with a bit of shock.
"i'm a grown ass man, i can take care of myself." he responds, not looking at you while pushing you away from his chest.
He quickly walks over to the fridge and grabs himself a cup of coffee- coffee that you made for him, hoping maybe he'd thank you or acknowledge you.
Not to your surprise, he just grabs it and walks to the sofa. Not one glance, not one "thank you". Nothing.
"hey jake, did i do something wrong? if so i'm sorr-"
And again, he cuts you off.
"can you just shut up please, you didn't do anything wrong." he tells you, and you're not convinced. How could you be?
"okay well then why have you been such an ass towards me? please just give me a fucking explanation" you say while sitting beside him on the sofa.
You notice how he moves away from you, and you can't help but feel a little frustrated.
"maybe it's because i'm sick of you always bothering me y/n."
Bothering him? You've only ever tried to care for him. Fuck, you can feel your eyes getting watery.
The room feels cold, even though the heater is on. There is no longer that warmth- the comforting warmth that you oh so loved. Things had really changed, and you really fucking hated it.
"bothering you? jake i'm your girlfriend, all i'm trying to do is love and care for you. i-"
"okay then just stop. stop loving and caring for me." he says in a louder tone of voice.
Now you're really frustrated. What the fuck is happening with Jake?
"what the fuck is wrong with you? jake, what the fuck?"
"nothing is fucking wrong with me y/n. maybe i'm just tired of your ass. maybe i'm just not in love with you anymore."
Did he just- oh. So you were right. He really doesn't love you anymore.
"jake you could've just told me you didn't love me anymore. you could've just told me so i didn't have to be put through this shit, and so that you could've just left." you tell him, your eyes filled with tears.
"i couldn't tell you because i know you would fucking cry like a crybaby."
You felt your heart break into two. The man you loved, your once sweet boyfriend, was now treating you like you were nothing to him.
And in Jake's eyes, you really were nothing to him anymore.
"jake what the fuck i-" you try to speak but you're choked up. And fuck, you feel the first tear fall and next thing you know- you're sobbing.
"see, look- you're crying. i knew you'd fucking cry. and shit, you're an ugly crier too. i can't keep up with your shit anymore y/n, i'm tired. you always treat me like i'm a baby, making me food and shit. just stop. i'm leaving and this is over. we're over. bye y/n" he says while getting up from the couch.
You feel numb. Your first love just stabbed you, right in the heart.
Before you could say anything back, he'd already grabbed his bag and jacket and was on his way to the front door. And this time, you knew he wasn't going to come back.
You quickly get up and run to the front door, stopping him in his tracks.
"jake can you atleast look at me please-" you tell him and he listens and looks at you. However, his stare is emotionless.
"please jake can i hug you one last time?...please" you ask, voice shaky from your sobbing.
"sure whatever" he responds in an annoyed tone of voice.
You slowly bring yourself closer to him and rest your head in his chest and wrap your arms around him. But you didn't feel that same warmth. You didn't feel any sort of love or comfort that you hoped you would.
He just stood there. He didn't wrap his arms around your waist and kiss the top of your head like he used to. Of course he wouldn't. You just missed the old jake.
"okay y/n that's enough. i'll get going" he tells you while unwrapping your arms.
You can't find any words to say to him, you really can't. You just stand there, looking and feeling like a complete mess.
"bye" jake says as he walks out the door.
You don't say "bye" back to him, because you can't.
You're just standing there, frozen, numb. You just watch him as he leaves. You watch him leave the apartment as your boyfriend, for the last time ever.
And then, the door closes. He wasn't your boyfriend anymore and you weren't his girlfriend anymore. And no you wouldn't be calling him your ex boyfriend or your first love.
If anything, you would call him a complete and total stranger.
part 2 is here and my other works are here ! pls reblog if you enjoyed :))
#jake sim#sim jaeyun#enhypen#enhypen angst#angst#enhypen x reader#jake x reader#enhypen jake#jaeyun#mochiwonz#jake angst#enha#enha imagines#enha jake#enha x reader#sim jake x reader
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Please Johnny come back to me.
4 months, 14 days, and 36 minutes��� thats how long it had been since Johnny was KIA.
That much time had passed and yet his heart still ached, the feeling of feelings hitting harder each time he tried to suppress them. Simon wasn't a therapy guy, he was the kind of guy to suppress everything until it came to much to bare, have a mental break down for a day, and then continue the same pattern over and over again. That was until Johnny at least… Because with Johnny it felt like he had some comfort, someone he could keep from the path he had been on… He kept Johnny off the path of darkness only for Johnny to end up on the path of death himself.
Makes sense to be fair… that the Ghost would lead his Johnny to death, what a person he was… He was the cause of this, death follows him around like a looming cloud and it takes those he cares about. It hurt him so bad, it made him ache, it made every part of his heart, soul, and mind ache with such pain.
Ghost grumbled opening his eyes, he looked at Gaz who sat across him right next to the captain. They were being send out on a mission, it was a mission involving some damn gas, the same gas that Makarov had been working on… Fucking Makarov, at least that prick was dead and gone…
Price grumbled fixing his weapon a bit, Ghost gaze went towards his captain, his captain who he was able to save at least… but just that once…
"You with us Ghost?" Price grumbled looking at the Lieutenant.
Ghost simply nodded.
"alright, we have to be quick.. in and get a hold of the gas, its in the southern part of the warehouse, Simon you will head straight there, Gaz and I will take the east and west wing and together will take the north after shipping the gas out." Price reminded Ghost of the mission and its details. That was good. Very good.
~~
They had landed a bit of a distance away from the warehouse what ever it took to get this damn mission done… Ghost slowly approched hte building, knifing anyone in his way. He wouldn't use his gun until he got the go ahead form Price.
5 dead, more to come…
Ghost with cold eyes watched as another man got to close to the shadows, he was quickly delt with a quick throat slash and he was gone. Left to gurgle on his blood and die in the mud. Simon crushed his radio in front of him watching the fear and light leave his eyes. Every time he did this now he only imagined Makarov's face, that brought back satisfaction to him.
He moved forward going into the building, making sure as to be as silent and stone cold as the reaper that stole Johnny from him. The dim green lights of the building gave it an old chill, like something was wrong here, something deeper then what Simon could tell.
With his feet on the move, with his whole body on the move he made it to the room where the gas was being held and created. A lab.. with tubes large enough to hold a person of his size as well.. "Found the gas, waiting for orders" Ghost grumbled into his coms as he went through the room. He found the papers on how the gas is made, as well as… human experimentation.. tch… of fucking course.
Ghost read through the report, skimming it a bit.
Gender: Male Height: 187.9 cm tall (6'2) Nationality: Scottish
Ghost heart froze for a moment, thinking of Johnny as he skimmed over the nationality of this person…
His heart ached thinking about Johnny, his Johnny… His sergeant… With a deep heavy heart he took the papers as well, they would be useful for later in research and evidence.
He put the files next to the gas before walking around the room, moving some things around before he found a strange rug… He grumbled moving it to the side, bring it away to reveal a door hatch.
"found a door hatch" Ghost grumbled over the coms, their was no response from the others… something was fucking wrong, deadly wrong…
The silence over coms made this whole mission worse. At least until Gaz's voice grumbled over the coms, "copy, be there soon"
Price gave a quick gruff, "search the room."
ok… so they were okay and fine, not dead… that's good, he doesn't need nor want anymore dead teammates after all. Ghost opened the door hatch moving his night vision goggles on turning them on as he headed down the stairs. This could be more storage for gas, meaning they could have underestimated how much these fuckers have.
Once he reached the bottom of the flight of stairs he continued through the room, shifting through the stuff around it was only wooden crates of the gas no doubt. He frowned, before noticing the door. He frowned scowling in anger and rage. How many rooms of gas did they need? What were they planning, what were they doing?!
Ghost went to the door trying the handle.
Locked… Of fucking course it was.
"Found a locked room, breaching now" Ghost grumbled before kicking the damn door down. He had to move, get through this room before returning back up their to guard what they had come for.
He looked through the room, raising his weapon. It was dark without his night vision goggles thus him having to do a overtake of a humanoid figure…
Wait… No… it couldn't be…
Slowly the person turned around the slights dimly flickering on in a dark green color..
"Johnny?" Ghost croaked out before he attacked, the man he loved was alive but fighting him.
No… No… NO!
Ghost dropped his gun instead taking Johnny's wrist when another punch was thrown and took him down to the floor. He had the other pinned down underneath him as he stared into the others eyes… His brown hazel eyes that were like dark voids peering into Johnny's eyes… they were the peaceful ocean blue he knew and loved, they were this strange green glowing version.. What the hell… what the absolute hell.
Johnny was under him glaring with those alien green eyes, this mask on his face was a black metalic color with clear holes showing the same green color running through it.
"Who the hell is Johnny?" He growled.
Johnny didn't remember his own name, he didn't remember him… he forgot them… damn it.. damn it.. it hurts so bad.. it hurt… knowing that, hearing that…
Simon knew it was for the best the Johnny forgot about him and how he failed him, but he was selfish.. Selfish like his father in the way he didn't want Johnny to forget him. Selfish in the way that Simon wanted Johnny to remember him, remember all of them, and everything that they had been through. Both good and the bad…
Simon's heart raced through his chest, aching in pain but love in seeing his Johnny alive once more…
"You are Johnny… You…" His voice was shacky as with one hand he held both of Johnny's the other removing that blasted mask that exhaled that damn blasted gaz. "You are Johnny, John 'soap' MacTavish, sergeant to the 141… the most crazy lad I have ever had the pleasure of dealing with… Johnny…" Simon mumbled looking at the other, he felt tears building up, the same damn tears he had been holding back since he held the others bleeding body…
their were so many questions running through his mind as to how he was standing here infront of them, well infront of him.. and not really standing but pinned down but thats the main idea.
The voices over his coms came through but he couldn't hear them. He could hear his captain or gaz asking for a report on what was going on…
"Johnny.. Johnny please come back to us… to me…" Simon all but begged. Simon was nothing but a past memory without Johnny…
A Ghost was nothing without a person to follow…
#call of duty#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#call of duty au#call of duty modern warfare 2#call of duty fanfic#oneshot#maybe#it might not be a oneshot idk#ghoap#ghostsoap#kyle gaz garrick#captain john price#john price#angst
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I'm trying to parse through why I don't like Jayvik as a romantic ship, and thought I could type it up to maybe offer a counterpoint to people who are writing this viewpoint off as homophobic or ableist. Yes absolutely those are reasons people might not love this ship, but I don't believe either of them is a reason I don't.
So. Heads-up for some Jayvik negativity and some other general criticism of the energy in the fandom (I'm not gonna try to be nasty but I am, by the very conceit of this post, going to have opinions), and a disclaimer that if Jayvik makes you feel seen or happy or anything else that's not bad and I'm not saying this ship is bad and you need to stop talking about it and liking it. I'm just saying I, an individual person, don't particularly care for romantic interpretations of these two, and I don't interpret their interactions as romantic or sexual.
Actually before I talk about anything at all I really like this post and this person has said things a lot of things smarter and better than I will about sex and sexuality and Jayce and Viktor https://www.tumblr.com/ohnoitstbskyen/768136874376232960/asking-sincerely-do-you-see-a-romance-between?source=share
I feel like I'm within the Jayvik demographic. Viktor is my favorite character in Arcane, despite quibbles with how he was handled. For over half my life my major OTP has been KuroFai, which has a pretty similar vibe (storywise, not characterwise) to Jayvik in the back half of the series they're from. The are-they-aren't-they discourse surrounding them was also quite similar for many years. I'm not gonna talk about them really, but here they are.
[image: an illustration of Kurogane and Fai from the manga Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle. Fai is a light-haired man with blue eyes, waving at the viewer with a relaxed expression. He has an arm around Kurogane, who is a grumpy-looking dark-haired man with red eyes and Fai's arm covering his mouth]
I'll admit to not having an incredibly good story reason that Jayvik SHOULDN'T be a thing, and I'm not going to present a good analysis really because I think I need to rewatch Arcane more than once to really have a solid grasp of it or a good read of the things that went "right" or "wrong" with the storytelling. This is literally my feelings-based opinion.
I like the idea that Jayce and Viktor have a deep-running love for each other that maybe defies attempts to define it as just friendship or brotherhood or romance or anything. I personally thought, in their final scene together, that the forehead touch was a far more heart-tugging, raw display of intimacy than a kiss would have been, and I genuinely didn't want them to kiss. I hope I've established that this is not because I don't like the idea of men kissing.
This may derive from the fact that I, like everyone, experience attraction in an individual way. For me, to extant, not-fictional people, almost never. I'm not uninterested in the idea of a life partner, and in fact would really like to have a person who I love more than anything in the world to go through life's hardships with, but I have rarely found an individual who I was interested in "romantically." I didn't experience adolescence the same way many of my friends did, and don't experience attraction to others in a way that seems "typical," if we can really define anything or anyone as typical. I have not been in a romantic relationship, not for lack of chances and not because I don't care about people - I have family and friends who I love very very much.
I think it is beautiful, the idea that two people can love each other, and support each other, and be soulmates and die together --- and not be in what mainstream society defines as "romantic love." If you want them to fuck nasty on the lab table that's okay too.
The second reason/cluster of reasons I don't really like romantic Jayvik is a little bit bitter and jaded and I'm sorry. It's the energy in the fandom and I can feel myself being pushed further into a stubborn opinion by the fact that I find this frustrating.
(I am putting on my "hypocrite" shirt)
Arcane has a really diverse cast. There are lots of women. There are lots of nonwhite characters. There are multiple prevalent, plot-important, kickass black characters. There is a canon wlw couple who make out on screen and then definitely fuck offscreen.
I know Jayce isn't necessarily meant to be white. Other than that. I think the fact that the Arcane tag is overwhelmingly Jayvik is just a little suspect. I told you it was a little bit bitter and jaded. I am not seeing the same level of fanart and analysis of specifically women and black characters, and I think that's an interesting energy this fandom is bringing to the table. I am not exempt from this criticism.
The longstanding argument that the reason we don't see more obsession with sapphic ships and characters who aren't (white) men is the lack of them in source material is feeling really hollow right now.
Anyway that's my two cents about Jayvik and if people care, cool, and if they don't, that's also cool. Please refrain from speculating about my sexuality in the comments. Peace and love.
Go donate to a palestininan, sudanese, congolese or lebanese family if you're able. Consider a donation to the Native American Rights Fund or another reputable organization, this week and always. In the wake of this election, you might consider mutual aid programs to help people in and around your community. It's cathartic to get drawn into fandom discourse, but there are bigger fish to fry.
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Somehow I didn't see this post, I'm sorry, Michelle!! But I'm so excited to dive into chapter 3...
I swear it's like one step forward, two steps back with this guy...
“Because there’s nothing worse than being trapped, unable to die, only to spend every waking moment in pain. All you want it someone to rescue you. So that’s what I did,” you said quietly.
Ugh I love this moment so much. Finally it seems like they're being raw and real and honest with one another. It's like Ben wants her not to hate him, not to fear him, but he can't help the "don't be a pussy" feeling that surges back up. 🙃
“Your generation is fucking insufferable,” he grumbled, walking across the deck, in through the back door.
LMfaooo okay, Ben. Whatever you say, gramps. 😝
His "two steps back" part of this seems largely because of getting infected, and the way he tries to convince her to stay seems actually genuine. I think by now he's afraid of being alone, whether he admits to it or not.
His story about his father throwing him into the lake... Ugh, it feels really on brand for what that man would do to his own son to try and "toughen him up."
“If you drop the Solider Boy shit and act like Ben. Act like the kind of man you wished your father had been to your mother.” His face went white in shock, Ben’s jaw dropping open slightly. “See? That normal guy is still inside of you. You know it’s wrong to be a dickhead. You fucking know it’s wrong and you do it anyway. But you have to stop. You have to be better. Not perfect, just better. Or else I’m gone Ben and this world gets a lot harder for both of us.”
Oooh my GOD. This had me gaping like a fish right along with Ben. "Act like the kind of man you wished your father had been to your mother."--is a LINE. I love how she calls him out here and points to the actually good man deep down inside him. He really does have to be better.
“How’d he do that? Activate them?” “Through eight years of torture.” Ben stared at you, his adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed thickly. “Everything was forced on me, all because of my stupid fucking genes. Do you finally understand why I saved you?”
Her past is so shocking and traumatic, and like she says, Ben can relate. Maybe they're finally having that moment of true connection.
“She would have liked you,” he mumbled. You burrowed into your sheets, letting sleep overtake you.
Aww don't do this to me. 😭😭 Not the "my mother would've liked you" -- it's such a lovely gut punch. But that cliffhanger was a different kind of gut punch! I'm so interested to see where you take this next!! 💚
The Villain’s Protector (Part 3) - Closer
Summary: The reader's in a bad spot when she's cornered by three infected intruders. But when the danger passes, she and Ben need to decide if they really can live together or if they'd be better off on their own...
Masterlist
Pairing: Soldier Boy x reader
Word Count: 3,700ish
Warnings: language, violence, life-threatening situations, death (minor characters), mentions of past torture
A/N: Happy Thanksgiving this week! Please enjoy Ben being an asshole/also his hilarious attempts at making up for it...
________
“Oh my god!” Both men spun their heads towards the back door, giving you a chance to make a break for it. You had to deal with the woman but at least you had a chance against her. In three large steps you were in front of her, ducking down to miss her punch. You kicked her knee, the woman shrieking and falling, giving you a chance to kick her back and shove her into your bedroom. You dove into the one across the hall, slamming the door shut behind you. Ben’s suit was draped over the back of a chair, his gun still in it’s holster.
Fuck it.
You abandoned barricading the door, barely getting across the room before it flew open, all three of them standing there. The gun was in your hand within a second, finger squeezing the trigger blindly. You hit one of them, the other two shouting behind him. You jumped to the right to avoid the woman, getting a few more rounds off. She went down when a blur slammed into you. You crashed back against a window, falling through it and straight onto the back deck. Something sharp was in your back and your hand was empty, eyes blearily opening as the red streaked man stood over you with the shears.
“You could have been one of us, bitch.” He opened the blades and drove them downwards, straight for your torso.
With a swift breeze, he was gone. You blinked rapidly, Soldier Boy standing over you, staring off to the side of the yard. Every muscle ached but you managed to look, spotting the man impaled on the shears about two hundred feet away in the grass. Strong hands turned your head, Ben’s face almost…worried?
You blinked, reaching up to grab his wrist, his eyes wide.
“You have glass all over. You need-”
“Are you wearing fucking oven mitts?” You smiled, Ben staring at where your hand rested on the pink things. “Pink oven mitts?”
“Shut your mouth,” he said, pouting when you sat upright with a groan. He ripped them off, kneeling beside you with a grimace. “Uh. How true is that whole can’t die thing?”
“That’s actually really smart,” you said, nodding to the mitts. “If they can’t touch your skin, maybe we can keep you safer. Keep us both-”
“Y/N!” He grabbed your shoulders, eye twitching. “Do not lose it on me. Will you die if I rip that giant shard of glass sticking out of your back out?”
You shook your head, already pulling pieces out of your legs and arms. He sighed, gripping the glass and pulling it out fast, your heart skipping a beat.
“Warn a girl,” you grit out, hands reaching for anything to grip onto through the pain which meant his shirt before you.
“You’re bleeding a lot,” he said. Shaking, you buried your face in his neck, breathing hard. “Y/N-”
“Take the rest out.” He tore your ruined shirt and jacket off, cool air hitting your back. He didn’t speak as he pulled out the other large shards you felt there but he flinched when you jerked into him and yelped.
Finally, you felt they were all gone, your head throbbing angrily but you knew it’d dissipate soon.
“I totally had that guy by the way,” you mumbled. Ben’s chest rumbled beneath you, his warm body lulling you into a calmness. “Was that a laugh, Benjamin?”
“You are something else.” With some effort, you leaned back, Ben grasping your chin and turning your face. “Shit, your cuts are healed already.”
“I’m just that special,” you said, trying to stand but falling straight against him when a sharp bolt of hot fire ran across your back.
“You heal fast but the pain-”
“Takes longer. I’ll be better in an hour.” You didn’t move from where he cradled your body against his, Ben’s body strangely relaxed. “Bet you’re happy. You got my shirt off.”
“You do have great tits,” he mumbled, tucking your head under his chin. You raised your eyebrows, gaze focused out on the lake.
“Ben, there could be more people nearby. We should probably move somewhere-”
“In the eighties I hired a young couple to take care of this place. They had a baby at the time I think. Landscape. Cleaning. That’s why that woman and those men were here. I let them live here in exchange for upkeep and I forgot they were here. This was my fuck up.”
“It was an accident, Ben. I don’t blame you. I’m fine.”
“You don’t realize you screamed when I took those glass pieces out, do you? The only reason you were in there alone was because I pissed you off again. I fucking forgot. I bring out your fucking shell shock, I screw up and you’re shaking in pain because of it. That’s not what a man does.” You sighed, taking a deep breath.
“Soldier Boy, you are ridiculous.” You moved your head so you could face him, Ben’s jaw clenched. You let your head fall onto his shoulder, offering a smile. “I’ve known evil men. Shitty, evil men. But you? You put on pink oven mitts which I’m confident you’ve never worn anything that shade in your life for fear it would shrivel your dick up. Yet, you did it for me. Here you are, apologizing in your own, albeit half-assed, way and look at that. Your dick is still just as big as it was an hour ago.”
He pouted, turning to look at the waters of the lake, ignoring your attempts at getting him to acknowledge his idea of what a man was wasn’t the only one . “Why did you break me out of that CIA black site? The truth this time.”
You closed your eyes, turning your head back under his chin when sharp, stabbing pains started up in your abdomen again. You tried to bite back the whimpers that caught in your throat but a few slipped through, Ben squeezing you tighter, anchoring you.
“Because there’s nothing worse than being trapped, unable to die, only to spend every waking moment in pain. All you want it someone to rescue you. So that’s what I did,” you said quietly.
He hummed, shifting his arms around you, holding your body against his.
“Do you still think I only want to use you, Ben?” He was quiet, slow steady beats of his heart thrumming underneath you for a moment.
“I could be evil. People thought that about me once upon a time. It’s how I ended up in Russia.” You shrugged, Soldier Boy shifting beneath you, soon carrying you back inside bridal style. You poked open an eye, Ben watching you closely. “I was trapped for a reason. Give it five minutes and you’ll hate my guts again.”
“Why would I hate the boy that wears pink oven mitts for me?” you teased. He rolled his eyes so hard you swore they were going to pop out the back of his head. You let your eyelid fall shut, head lolling back until he adjusted you. “If you end up screwing me over, then fine, you’re a monster. But until otherwise, will Mr. Evil please get me into a bath tub?”
“Your generation is fucking insufferable,” he grumbled, walking across the deck, in through the back door.
“Yes, yes, whatever you say, Satan.”
“What did I say about shutting that fucking mouth?”
“Ben.” You opened your eyes when a door creaked, Ben setting you down in a large claw foot tub a moment later. You tilted your head, his face a mixture of annoyance and wanting to get out of the room as fast as possible.
“What?” he growled, turning the water on warm and slow for you, setting some towels down next to the tub.
“Just wanted to say we had a whole conversation where we didn’t fight. I think you’re in serious danger of losing your asshole status if you keep this up.” He gave you his bitch face and dropped a bar of soap in your hands. “Admit it. You like this, being yourself again.”
“You are weak and pathetic and like all women, you need a man to save you and then complain about us in the same breath. I ain’t a fucking pussy so don’t get fucking comfortable with me thinking I’m like your fucking girlfriend. I give the orders, not you.” He stood up and slammed the door on his way out.
So much for that progress.
You and Ben kept your distance after that. You spent most of the day cleaning the blood off the walls and floor while Ben disposed of the three bodies in the nearby woods. It was dark by the time he returned, the house smelling of disinfectant.
He threw his boots on the ground and gave you a glare as you ate a bowl of beans at the dining room table. He stormed around the kitchen, narrowing his eyes at the pot on the stove and the empty bowl on the counter beside it.
“Beans? I’ve had fucking paste shoved down my gob for weeks and you make me fucking beans?” You finished off your dinner, leaning back in your seat with crossed arms. He puffed out his chest, pointing a finger. “Don’t you fucking start, bitch.”
“Does it make you feel like more of a man to yell at me? Maybe you even want to hit me. Fucking go for it. We both know I can take it.” You got up, getting in his face and throwing him off guard so much so he stumbled backwards. “You want me to think you’re a monster? Go ahead. Hurt me. Insult me. Prove me wrong. Show me just how awful you really are deep down and that there’s no shred of a soul left in there.”
“Shut the fuck up!” he shouted, towering over you, his face turning red.
“Do it!” He growled, grabbing your arms, picking you straight off the ground.
“Look at me!” You were ready to kick him in the nuts when you noticed the red on his face was…bright. Too bright. Infected bright.
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll help you alright.” You put your hand to his face, Ben instantly dropping you, both of you falling to the ground. This felt different than before. There was no sharp pain from the redness your hand absorbed from his face. No, it was warmer, a slow burning sensation that built up and up and had you gritting your teeth.
He gasped and choked before rolling away, your body falling back on the hardwoods. You panted, staring at the wood beams crossing the ceiling when Ben crawled over, staring down.
“I got some of their blood on me earlier when I killed that guy. I think it got on my face,” he breathed out. You nodded, giving him a thumbs up. “It must act slower that way?”
“Depends. Am I a weak, pathetic bitch?” you said, Ben lowering his head. “Good. See, we’re all good.”
“You didn’t scream this time at least,” he said, helping you sit up against the cabinets. He sat back against the fridge behind him, both of you catching your breath. “Why?”
“The more a particular…injury happens to me, the recovery period from the pain shortens. You didn’t have the streaks in you fully or else you’d be dead so it wasn’t as bad this time.” He shook his head, running a hand through his brown strands. “What?”
“Your powers suck.”
“Not powers,” you sighed, Ben pursing his lips. “I swear. I’ve never taken compound V in my life.”
“Well then you must be a natural born supe. Is Reaper your dad or some shit?”
“No,” you snapped. Ben held up his hands, giving you just enough of a pout to make you feel bad. He got up and scooped some beans into a bowl, glancing at you once. The floor creaked, your eyes drifting up to watch him settle down across from you, slurping up his dinner. “Why are you eating on the floor?”
“Jesus fucking Christ, woman,” he said with his mouth full and a roll of his eyes. “Can I eat my dinner where the fuck I want to?”
“Of course you can.” He made a face, pointing his spoon at you when you parted your lips.
“I swear to God if the next words out of your mouth are to argue with me, you will not like the outcome,” he barked. You swallowed down your comment about how the chair and table would be more comfortable. If he wanted to sit his ass on the hard floor, fine, that was on him.
You closed your eyes and tucked your knees up to your chest, lowering your head to rest it against them.
“You’re a pretty good liar. Most women are but you put them all to shame.” You frowned, lifting your head wearily. He stood, setting his empty bowl on the counter before squatting down right in front of you. Long fingers grasped your chin, turning your head left, then right. “Your jaw is clenched so hard you could snap a tree in half.”
“Fine. It hurts whenever I absorb that red matter stuff from you. There’s nothing either one of us can do about it so why does it matter if you know?” His grip on your chin tightened, just hard enough to make you wonder if he was considering killing you.
“Don’t fucking look at me like that.” Ben’s grip loosened, his thumb wiping away the wetness that’d gathered under your eye.
“Like what?” you whispered, intense green eyes boring straight through to your core. He leaned in closer, his breath hot.
“Like I’m going to hurt you.”
“This was a mistake. Just cover yourself up when you go out and you should be okay,” you said. You got to your feet and barely made it out of the kitchen when his hand landed on your shoulder, freezing you in place. “Forget about Reaper. You’re free Ben. Just live your life how you want to.”
“Why the hell are you trying to get out of here so badly all of a sudden?”
You closed your eyes, clenching your fist when a wave of burning heat flooded your veins. “Why do you care if I stay?”
“I can drown.” You turned around, furrowing your brow. Ben raised his chin, nodding once. “I nearly did as a kid, out in that lake.”
You both looked out to the dark water, gazes slowly drifting back to one another. He sat down on the edge of the couch arm, running a hand through his hair. He smiled but it didn’t reach his eyes, head shaking as he glanced at a knot of wood in the floor near your feet.
“My father took me out in a rowboat to the middle of the lake when I was a boy. Maybe seven, eight? He threw me over the edge, told me to start swimming.” His eyes met yours, his smile faltering. “It wasn’t until I started to sink did he pluck me out. He was so…disappointed in me the whole way back to the dock. I was convinced he’d throw me out any second. I never told my mother what happened but somehow she knew. It was the only time I ever saw her argue back against him. She ended up showing me how to swim over the next week right where it’s shallow at the shore edge.”
“Why are you telling me this Ben?” you asked quietly. He shrugged.
“You can either be terrified that something more powerful than you will kill you and that fear makes you run from it. Or…you can be a man and face it, tell that thing it’s not more powerful. You learn to respect each other’s power and work together.”
“A lake doesn’t snap your neck in your sleep when it gets mad at you,” you whispered. He sighed, his jaw clenching slightly. “You just…you’re so mean to me that I couldn’t even tell you were infected until you were literally ready to pummel me and I saw the red streaks. Ben, I didn’t know you wouldn’t hurt me. I read the CIA’s file on you and god, you’ve hurt so many people Ben. People you supposedly cared about, loved even. How the hell am I not supposed to be terrified of you? Maybe I was wrong and we should just go our separate ways.”
You headed down the hall, pausing when you heard him walk up behind you.
“If you stay…I’ll give you whatever you want.”
“It’s the end of the world, Ben. Forget about Reaper. What could you possibly give me that’d make me okay with staying with you?” You glanced over your shoulder, Ben’s face strangely soft.
“My word.” He held out his hand, fighting back a frown when you narrowed your eyes at it. “I’m fucking trying here.”
“Not good enough.” You stormed into the bedroom, grabbing a duffel from the ground as he huffed. You started to shove some things inside when he cleared his throat.
“Please stay.” You poked your head out in the hallway, Ben gritting his teeth.
“Did you say please?” you asked. He rolled his eyes. You stepped back out, crossing your arms. “Fine. I’ll stay.”
“Good-”
“If you drop the Solider Boy shit and act like Ben. Act like the kind of man you wished your father had been to your mother.” His face went white in shock, Ben’s jaw dropping open slightly. “See? That normal guy is still inside of you. You know it’s wrong to be a dickhead. You fucking know it’s wrong and you do it anyway. But you have to stop. You have to be better. Not perfect, just better. Or else I’m gone Ben and this world gets a lot harder for both of us.”
“I…will try if tell me one real thing about yourself, why you don’t die.” He stood his ground, lips pressed into a thin line. You looked away, leaning against the door jam.
“You know how…you know when you did the Compound V trials and all the other participants died except for you?” He nodded once, tilting his head. “That was because your genes are advantageous. Your genes could handle that…evolutionary leap.”
“Like a Punnet square.” You raised your eyebrows. “I’m not a moron.”
“Well, yes, sort of like that. Your gene mixture basically was special. My genes are also…special.” You frowned, Ben’s fingers reaching out to graze your cheek. Your eyes wandered up to meet his, his green eyes curious, guarded. You crossed your arms, looking past him. “My genes, eventually, would have allowed future generations from my bloodline to be natural supes. Millions of years down the line. It’s incredibly rare. Think of it like if your genes and mine were in a race, I’m starting a hundred million miles ahead of yours and we’re racing to the same point.”
“You would get there faster,” he said quietly. You nodded.
“Reaper found out about my genes. He ended up, activating those special parts of my genes and transfused me with his blood when he did so. He didn’t know what would happen but it gave me the ability to not die, like him. It was all an experiment to him.”
“How’d he do that? Activate them?”
“Through eight years of torture.” Ben stared at you, his adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed thickly. “Everything was forced on me, all because of my stupid fucking genes. Do you finally understand why I saved you?”
Ben nodded, letting you slip into your bedroom. You lay back on the old mattress, body in desperate need of sleep and rest. By the time you managed to get out of your jeans and under the covers, the door was cracking open. Ben was carrying something, a mug. Steam billowed from it as he set it down on the nightstand. Then he was leaving, nearly pulling the door shut behind him when he stopped.
“There are things I would say to you if I wouldn’t be a pussy for saying them.”
“Ben?” He looked over his shoulder, catching your smile as you sat up and took a sip of the hot tea. “That’s good enough for tonight. Thank you for the tea.”
He nodded, hesitating once more. “Drink that and then go the fuck to sleep. You look awful.”
“Goodnight to you too.” He grumbled and pulled the door shut, leaving it open a sliver to let in some light from the hall. You heard movement outside and heard a chair scrape along the wood floor. With you mug in hand, you tiptoed over, opening the door.
Ben was sat in a chair right outside your room, frowning when he saw you. “I thought I told you to sleep.”
“What are you doing?” He rolled his eyes.
“Just go to the fuck to sleep. We need to get a game plan together in the morning and you won’t be able to do that if you’re a zombie. Go before I make you.”
You took a sip of tea, offering him a tiny smile. “Try to get some sleep yourself at some point. It was a long day.”
“Y/N…” he warned. You took a big swig of tea and handed him the mug, Ben cautiously taking it.
“I think I’m starting to get you, Ben. You’re an acts of service kind of guy.” He stared at you like you had three heads and shook his own. “I’ll explain someday.”
“Alright, that’s it,” he stood, watching you scurry back to your bedroom. You plopped into bed, Ben pointing a finger at you before sitting back down. You tugged up the covers, putting your back to him as a wave of exhaustion hit you.
You were just barely holding onto consciousness when something heavy draped over your body in the cool room.
“She would have liked you,” he mumbled. You burrowed into your sheets, letting sleep overtake you.
That was until four am.
That’s when you woke up to screaming.
___________
A/N: Part 4 coming soon!
#soldier boy#soldier boy x reader#the boys#soldier boy fanfiction#soldier boy x you#soldier boy x female reader#the boys fanfic#soldier boy au#the boys au#apocalypse au#soldier boy fanfic#jensen ackles
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#im falling apart#its starting to get to the point that it always does#instead of answering every single message i dont reply every single second#im not replying to my mom as much#fuck i want to fucking disappear holy fuck.#genuinely think everyone would be better off#literally just a burden#not trying to play victim i genuinely feel like j an#i only make everything worse#‘ur so nice!!!’ im literally a horrible person.#and i cant even kms becahse when i feel burnjng i get flashbacks#like what the fuck is wrong with me just man up and die#sui vent#tw sui implied#s/h tw#idk what else#tw sui ideation#vent
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with the obvious addendum that act 3 isn’t out yet and we can’t form true opinions until the show’s officially done, i’m still really feeling like it could have maybe benefited from a third season. they’re hitting all the right plot points and those moments are full of really intense emotion, but everything in the middle feels so underwhelming in comparison and so much of it still feels rushed to me. idk
#arcane#arcane spoilers#i could kinda deal with it act 1 bc there was a lot to cover through the fallout after s1. but act 2 i'm reallyyyyyy feeling it#like dont get me wrong it's still so so so good#and i guess that's what makes it so much more frustrating#like you can see all the ways it can be just that littlest bit even better#but i guess if the biggest complaint viewers have about your show is that they want more then that already says a lot you know#anyway#it's the warwick / isha plot that bugs me specifically bc isha (love her to death) feels lowkey like a cop out#introduce a kid just to heavy push the 'cycle of violence' 'find your humanity again' character arcs only to kill her six episodes later#like EVERYONE was saying 'ive never seen a character so obviously created to die'#the subversive thing would be to have her live and show the cycle of violence is ending or something#but here's another broken kid killed by the system here's more proof that jinx is. well. a jinx.#idk idk idk#and warwick. i wanted so much MORE#heavily build up warwick all through act 1 just to have him die end of act 2#we barely got to see him at full power.#we barely got to see him with vi and jinx.#we barely got to see him reckon with the man he was and the monster he is now.#we got next to nothing before he's just dead. again#and again those scenes hit SO GODDAMN HARD. THEY ARE GOOD. but they couldve hit even harder if they just had more time to flesh it out !!!!#but again again no act 3 yet so who goddamn knows at this point#they aint dead til we see the bodies and even then they might not be dead bc thats just how arcane works#but fuck i just wish we sometimes had time to sit and FEEL things before the next new thing starts#ok im done rambling i just had to say something somehwere because its driving me insane#my posts
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throws up my hands in mock resignation but also a hint of frustration Okay Valentino is a cool villain I guess
He's like. Genuinely unsettling. Wish the show struck a better balance with his character sometimes (like sometimes when he's onscreen I have to skip over because I feel queasy and sometimes he's so unsubtle he feels more like a prop than a guy who's going to be a Huge Deal in s2)
#why yes I have been reading some phenomenal fanfiction lately#a lesser me would be agonising over my inability to ever come close to matching the#masterfully characterised works of these talented WORD WEAVERS#but envy is a spoilt housepest and we must spend less time unleashing it upon new targets#instead let's talk about how these fics discovered its possible??#to write Val as not only a 3dimensional character but a deeply horrifying person to WITNESS#to depict how he thinks and what he wants and what he contributes to the people around him#while acknowledging that his actions are supremely messed up#also without dumbing whatever the fuck is wrong with him down to just 'can't do math and needs a sippycup'#those jokes are funny but he's also a dealmaker#he doesn't need to be studied under a microscope! he needs to be gawked at in abject horror! Oh the Potential!#he needs to tell us more about how depraved hell can be by linking us to a portion of the culture full of the dead who cannot die!#anyways. rant over. uh I think I like valentino now? in the same way I like the old man villain from hunchback of notre dame.#just. (gestures) what is this dude. ew. oh my god#my post#personal stuff#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel valentino#is this anything#again I am entrenching on dangerous territory of 'expectations for this media I consume'#he really doesn't need to be written all shakespearean-like#too attached mayhaps#delete later#honestly worried that if the show does reveal his backstory or whatever it'll try to paint him in a sympathetic light#and then the online arguments will be a headache for a month#villain with tragic backstory ≠ sympathetic villain
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#??????????????????#????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????#i dont know what to doooooooooooo i dont know what to do w my life.....#i dont wanna go to college im way too stupid for that and also its insane like#im scared i dont like anything enough to make it worth it. not even biology#thats like 5 years idk and i fucking hate school.... i think id kill myself if i had to go back to somerhing remotely similar#idk thats scary.....#my plan b was getting a job and i rlly tried but im a pussy . i only started to go out and do stuff like last year. and im an adult !!#i feel like i fucked something up at some point in my life cuz like this is insane#im stuck in limbo. like theres something wrong and its not the autism#bites a cinderblock bites a cinderblock#man im so fucking scared everyday i feel like im going insane . i cant even imagine me doing anything#theres something wrong w me cuz thats like not normal . i dont wanna die in my bed but everything else scares me#fucked up if true#uh#vent#its funny af tagging my posts w vent but i tag them so u can block them or whatever#FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK IF ONLY REDBULL ACTUALLY DID SHIT TO ME . THEN ID BE FIXED#FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKKKKKKKKKKK I JUST WANT AN ENERGY DRINK THAT WORKS PLEASEEEEEEEEEEE PLEASE GOD#PLEASE PEKASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
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geppetto couldnt have been bothered to show any love for either of his sons 💀
#lies of p#hes so willing to attack a being that looks exactly like his dead son and rip its heart out like what is wrong with you#also he was neglecting carlo to work on p and then proceeds to neglect p to bring carlo back???#you just hate your son!!! awful father!!!#aki.txt#hate that guy dbdbsb#lies of p spoilers#im assuming he was working on p back then idk i just think thats fucked up in itself bc hes like planning for carlo to die or something#man i never trusted him#like you couldve tried to get me on your side lmao#he even admits it like yeah you COULDVE read his favorite book with him 😒#or like talked to p for more than 5 seconds yknow
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Good morning tumblr.
Made a followup to this comic yippee yay wahoo yay. ID in alt
#generate random art#yttd#your turn to die#sara chidouin#yttd sara#shin tsukimi#sou hiyori#yttd shin#yttd sou#ryoko hirose#yttd ryoko#grrrrrrr i hate them i hate them i hate them augghg#someone’s jealouuuuuus gehehehe#dude I gotta punt him off a cliff what is wrong with him i need this man to explode violently#yeah i think this is way more in character than him trying to help like a normal person#fuck this teenager’s crying uhhhh better use abusive mom tatics i guess#he’s so fucked up man and he hates her so much augh#and Sara tried to be a normal fucking person she tried to be his friend but godddd he’s such a shithead I mean he is so annoying#dude if a guy antagonized me like this when I was crying over my dead friends i would use his dead sister against him too I’m just sayin#kinda wish I didn’t out Ryoko there so they could just keep arguing that would’ve been fun. oh well. i like this way too#also. also. did you catch that he dropped the honorific. did you catch that. did you. did you. it was on purpose :]
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Feeling very Ascension by Gorillaz ft Vince Staples at 2:18
#i need to solve a puzzle or some shit. god. fuck.#i cant concentrate on anything i cant fall asleep i cant stay asleep i cant stay awake i cant wake up on time#i hate depression 😒 and all the other things wrong with me yknow#i need to do something like. good for me. but its so damn hard to drag myself into doing that too#brain. stop being so foggy. please.#im even like. im eating im drinking water. i could probably like do some sort of exercise but everything makes me so tired.....#like even a walk yknow? i do my shift at work and im at 3% battery. i dont. i dont know what to do man#and i dont even wanna die about it???? im actively NOT suicidal for once#like are you kidding me??? ive been suicidal for like over a decade and for once#my brain is still popping up like have you considered killing yourself? 🤔 but im Genuinely not swayed by it at all#which is weird. and probably good. but now i just feel like. numb#stuck. stagnant. foggy. can we PLEASE cut through this fog and have some meaningful brain functions for a little bit. brain. cmon#i dont wanna die but i *do* wanna sleep for like. three days#i want a week off where i have NOTHIN to do#genuinely nothing to do. chores are done work is on pause i need nothing creeping in at the edges thinkin bout#ohhhhh you should be doing this instead..........youre wasting your time........do a task.....#but i cant i cant do a task. i cant. and its so frustrating and i feel bad about it#id feel much worse about it if my BRAIN wasnt as foggy as fucking SAN FRANCISCO#and i keep trying like. healthy ways of ''feeling something'' like hobbies i like or yummy food#nothin. does fuckin nothin. i get off and it gives me a Little bit of clarity Maybe. like#no wonder bad coping mechanisms happen yknow??? its an absolute fucking miracle i havent taken up smoking#anyway. i need to go to bed. tomorrows gonna be a long day. if you feel so inclined send me mental love or something. im fuckin tired folks.
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𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
#sorry everyone another spiral/vent incoming#mental health been so bad this week I said fuck it and found a therapist#because I cannot keep living this way it’s ruining my life#like rn I’m terrified to go to sleep bc I’ve convinced myself of a blood clot in my arm 😐 and it’s like realistically it was probably just#cramping bc I did some crafts today in a not great position like in my head I know that’s probably what it is but then there’s always that#little voice saying what if it’s not what if it is actually a clot and you go to bed and die? and what am I supposed to do with that? just#go to bed? I cant. I know unfortunately tonight will be a night where I will stay up until I physically can’t anymore so yay so fun#and it’s like a bunch of little things add up to symptoms in my mind and suddenly I cant remember if my arm has always looked that way or#always been that red etc. it’s so frustrating#why was I cursed to be so stupid and annoying? ugh#not only that I’m extremely nauseous rn ugh#I had to buck up and put my grown man pants on and finally pick a therapist can you believe it’s the#same therapist I’ve been thinking about since I first started looking at the beginning of the year 😐 what is wrong with me man idk why I put#it off for so long but hopefully now I can get the ball rolling on this and work towards being better and maybe even being on meds and#I think it’s bc I didnt wanna do virtual but for rn that would be best for me#please god don’t let it be out the ass expensive#honeslty idek if it’s bc my mental health was bad this week I just had a lot of spirals this week and the past few weeks have been stressful#and I’m just so done with it like I got so annoyed I scheduled/requested appointments I’d been putting off out of fear and now this
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Idk if yall are still active but I just eagerly quit this show around early season two. I was kinda hate watching the whole way, but I started googling spoilers when I saw how fucked they were being to Lincoln and Raven (and more, but they’re my faves). Do you have any show recs that are similar with the shows “building a new civilization after tragedy” (minus the colonization and racism etc)
hey!
i actually binged the entire show recently and i can confidently say it was not as groundbreaking or cool as the showrunner believed. the first 2 seasons were incredible but it just devolved into a mess and the ending was so dark and horrifying. also the fandom was completely unhinged and did not need to act the way they did 😭
onto your question: yes!!!! battlestar galactica is what inspired me to watch the 100 in the first place. it very much shares the themes of mass tragedy, civilizational warfare, living in space, seeking a new home, and humanity fighting for survival without losing its soul. start with the 2003 miniseries (a three hour pilot) tho or it might be confusing. it also has diversity without the weird racist tones of the 100's diversity, although the cast is a lot whiter. the 100 has also obviously borrowed a lot of concepts and terms from it but i don't want to spoil you. all in all, it is one of the best shows i have ever watched and it delivers until its very last second.
lost in space is also quite cool. and i have heard good things about the expanse! another show that shares some themes (without the space element) is the society - very fascinating
#i have also changed my mind on a few things rewatching as a full blown adult without any fandom influences#octavia - not abusive until her annoying blodreina shit but she was traumatized whatever#clarke - yes manipulative but she really believed she was doing it for everyones good and was the first to let herself suffer for others#no one was perfect ever#everyone fucked up hard and the fandom's insistence on making everything black and white was so toxic#it was just more complex than teen stans could stomach#for example. bellamy killing the sleeping army was wrong. but for clexas to extrapolate that grounders = natives and skypeople = colonizers#girls what??? lol#and similarly the insistence that bellamy is a white man so could feel better hating him?? soooo ridiculous#similarly.... bellarkes did set themselves up for disappointment when they chose not to believe the showrunner about it being platonic 24/7#and lexa was really never bad like even when she left their asses to die i get why... people were just mad about clexa#all this to say everyone would be better off if they watched it with a more rational neutral detached lens and didnt make it about idpol#this includes me lol#the racism was real the homophobia was real and the fans amplified both to insane degrees#the end!
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Honestly a lot of the time, it's not even about people having to agree with me, it's about needing to know that they actually heard and listened to what I had to say even if it didn't persuade them
Just... some basic indication that there's enough respect to give a shit about what I said, and also to make sure that they disagree because they actually disagree and not cause they just didn't bother listening
It's all I really ask
#I forgot what this was about part way through writing about it; but then I remembered it's about Ukraine#like I just need to know that you actually understand what's happening there and what people are going through#you want me to care about your thing? show me you have any any any grasp of what's going on in Ukraine#it's uh... it's too many friends where if I'm just honest... this is about them#people I adore but people where... I don't know if they ever even once listen to what I have to say#...though maybe it's better this way... at least if they just ignore me I can say they just don't understand what's going on#that they're just being fed lines by other people or don't care#...if... they... knew the shit Ukrainians go through and still didn't care... would be a lot harder to respect them#would take a certain level of callous to do that and... these are people I care about very much so#...but I don't know; eats at me... you know#...and even on less serious topics... boy I wish you'd ever listen to me#if it weren't for the fact you say you like me... I'd be pretty damn sure you can't fucking stand me and I do nothing but annoy you#...I don't know if you've... ever... listened to anything I've said on any subject#when you do; you usually correct me... even though; brilliant as you are... you're erm... not always right#I don't get it... I don't get you... every word I say seems to be wrong... I'm so stupid and you're so smart#and yet you get real upset when I want to die... so you must actually like me and our communication styles don't match up#thank god you never seem to read my tags... or... much of anything else I say#truthfully I'd follow you anywhere; and you can treat me any way you want#but man I don't think my thoughts or opinions matter to you even a little... I think I just exist to be your rubber duck#...that's how it feels anyway#but all that aside... just wish you'd listen to me on Ukraine cause it actually matters#this post started out about some other people too... and sure... I like them well enough; and they're maddeningly wrong#like sputnik levels or wrong#drives me nuts; like you're not stupid and you're not cruel so why do you act so stupid and cruel?... turn you brain on#but uh... I actually just don't care about them that much#where as you... I could put it into words... but I won't#it's just a shame... like forget any of the stuff about me; it's just you're so kind... wish you'd care about what's going on in Ukraine#...I gotta stop or I'll go on all night; and I'm already too tired#mm tag so i can find things later
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Bad day. Horrible awful terrible bad day
#there’s not even a reason. nothing bad has actually happened#it just FUCKING SUCKS#I want to walk into a lake and never come back#I want to take my brain out of my skull and throw it at a wall and watch it splatter#I know today sucks because I’m so tense and upset that my back HURTS so fucking bad#cuz when this happens I tense up and my back muscles decide to coil around my spine and squeeze like a starving snake#it’s spreading through my shoulders and even to my chest which is a first#I just 😭😭😭 I want to go home except home also sucks cuz roommate#and I know he’ll be out in a few days but that feels like forever#and I’m so tired and I’m so upset and I want to curl up in a ball and cry and hide from the world#but I’m working a 7 day stretch at my job#and I have to transfer the power and internet to my name sometime before Wednesday#and I’m so sick of takeout the idea of eating it makes me want to vomit but I can’t physically bring myself to cook while they’re there#and I just. ugh. UGH#I’m so sick of existing#why does my life only allow me small handfuls of months at a time#where I’m not living in some form of disaster and stressed to all hell and back and just wanting to lay down and die#what did I do so wrong. what have I done to deserve all this shit#in my short terrible miserable fucking life#whatever I’ll just go home and stare at the wall#and then go to bed and come to work and come to work and come to work there’s always going to work#I’m going to fucking scream I hate my brain#why can’t it just regulate itself in a normal way cuz that’s the thing I know I’m being insane and nothing is actually this bad#but man if it doesn’t fucking feel that way#and being aware I’m being batshit really doesn’t make it better actually I think it makes it worse#kaz rambles
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