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mdhwrites · 11 months ago

Note

Which character stands out the most for you in Star Rail?

Meet Guinevere, though known nowadays as Guinaifen or Little Gui after her planet blew up and she moved to the Xianshou Loufu to be a street performer.

She is actually one of the characters I DON'T have leveled right now, though she's high on my priority list. This also means that she's caught my attention despite the fact that I'm not mechanically using her and she's also a four star so she's not one of the characters you have to go hard on trying to get ahold of. In fact, come 2.0, one of the events for that patch will include the chance to get a free Guinaifen (if you pick her over the other options available.)

No, this actually just comes down to the fact that she is a very VIVID character, even without reading her character story. In the game, she has had two major appearances. One was when she first came out and was given a small introduction in the Pokemon parody event where she introduced herself as an outworlder living on the kiiiind of racist Xianshou Loufu as a street performer which would not be an easy job to put it mildly. Little Gui is her online handle/her performance handle and her performances include, not kidding or over exaggerating: Slurping Noodles While Doing a Handstand Brushing Teeth While Whistling Smashing Boulder on Chest (She even has a special equip that literally shows and talks about her doing this with her bestie) Blocking Pike with Neck Swallowing Sword to Stomach CATCHING BULLET WITH HANDS

AGAIN. NOT A JOKE. AND THAT'S NOT EVEN A FULL LIST.

And mind you, with this being a space fantasy, live streaming exists and yes, Little Gui is a streamer. What sort?

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That sort. Also, meet Sushang, her best friend. They are maybe the only two female friends in this game, along with their HuoHuo, who I do not go "AND THEY WERE ROOMMATES!" But yeah, she's a bit loud, she's trying really hard and she's just got so much energy.

But... This is where we get into why she is actually interesting. See, when this cutscene happens... She's in a slump. See, the majority of her content effectively revolves around her being an outsider of the Loufu, where she lives now. Her first big hit series was actually doing food reviews and detailing the best dining spots and delicacies on the ship. She's not been doing those lately though. In fact, she hasn't been streaming as much either.

Also, if you question her as she wants to go to the haunted garden, she will actually drop the act. Her VA, English one since I don't play with Japanese voices, is actually INCREDIBLE here because you can genuinely tell the shift in just her voice to be a little deeper and little more relaxed as she stops trying to hype things up. Little Gui is NOT Guinaifen after all. It's just her stage name.

Mind you, she also isn't entirely a liar either. She is passionate and excitable, she has the right energy to do this sort of work, but the game doesn't try to pretend that she's cranked up to eleven at all times. She's just a human being trying to make it in this world. I haven't seen many streamer characters admittedly but I genuinely love how real she feels as a performer like this while staying a person.

Part of her standing out admittedly is helped by being a part of literally the best content on the planet she's a part of. Fyxestroll Garden is a great expansion with a nice story that eventually starts mixing the science and fantasy sides really well as Guinaifen helps lead the Ghost Hunting Squad! She deals with the social media side of it to keep rumors down and keep the rest of the Loufu from understanding quite what is going on while her, Sushang and the little girl with paw eyes from the trailer, Huohuo.

The trio are all helpless scaredy cats. Little Gui is the bravest of all of them and as you saw in the video, that isn't saying much. But through the events, she had to confront her old fans, show us how she works and be just a lot of fun. It also makes sure that you always remember her as part of this trio, giving her people to bounce off of and add to her cheer and charm.

And that's despite the fact that her PLANET IS FUCKING GONE. Yeah, the biggest antagonistic force of the universe literally destroyed her home planet. She can never go back and it's REALLY easy not to properly realize this because it comes up in a TEXT MESSAGE and from her character stories which you only get if you level her up. It's admittedly MUCH more explicit in her character story page, I'm reading them now on the wiki, but you only get those parts of her if you actually use her. Here is her singing of it as a part of a folk song, which is another talent she uses for her performances. I was truly from that outworld court named Camelot, and has my siblings altogether a dozen lot. Our days were peaceful and joyous to boot, but who'd thought that the Ruin Author made trouble all afoot. Parents fought back the invaders and arms they took, yet the Legion broke the nation's back. Powerless Dad stood. Elder brother led us siblings wandering without a root, to an IPC mining planet covered in dark soot. Eke out a living with meager scraps we undertook, homeless and meal-less often was our wont. My brother a timid man, doing back-breaking work. To piracy he was forced, interstellar raider forsook. Commercial shipments he only waylaid, homes he never burnt. They sing he was a hero among bandits, distributing his loot. He led hundreds of poor souls in a desperate force, terrible to look. Fallen wayward in the eyes of the law, just so we get enough food.

...Have Little Gui juggling to rinse that out a bit.

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(This is one of her two idles and I love it.)

But the fact that this backstory isn't the core of her character, it is instead how she has decided to rise from the ashes that's important, is part of what I love about her character. If you just want to treat her as a fun performer, that's okay! If you want to see her as another pair of lesbians with ShangShang, the game allows for that too. But there's just... A lot. A lot of potential while still have a fleshed out and realized person behind it. It's part of why of all the characters I'd love to next see get a 5 star upgraded version (we've gotten one already), I'd LOVE to see Princess/Queen Guinaifen someday who manages to bring her old home and new together into something even better.

If she never does though, I won't complain either. Not when I'm already a fan of Little Gui and SMASHED that subscribe button.

And just to finish this off: She is currently considered the third best Damage over Time, DoT, character in the game (there are six if we count Black Swan who comes out in five days) and the best of the four star DoT characters. Her kit is actually REALLY strong, even mimicking one of the best parts of a 5 star DoT character in retriggering a certain type of DoT. Not only that but she debuffs the enemy to make them take more damage from anything the more times they get burned, her style of DoT. She also has just an absolutely amazing ult animation even though I can't tell you why these small dogs, called Ditings, are related with her so much.

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(I wasn't able to find gifs for this that would actually work for either this or her idle, hence the videos.)

So yeah, if she's caught your eye too, she's actually really good and super viable as a sub-DPS/debuffer. It's something I will always keep pointing out because the 4 stars in this game are genuinely strong and Guinaifen is no different. I just unfortunately took a while to realize and have also been using so many resources on upgrading other characters.

But yeah, I could keep going but she herself would tell me to leave the audience wanting more. So leave another ask if you want to hear what I think you could do non-canonically with her or the like, or just to hear thoughts on other characters like the rest of the ghost hunting squad themselves. For now, she still stands tall as one of my favorites in the game and honestly, probably my favorite character from her planet, even if it isn't her original home. The Loufu desperately needed a laugh though and this firecracker is just what the doctor ordered.

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As a note: I don't know if I'd say she's my favorite character. She's up there and almost certainly is top three or five but she's got some stiff competition. She is probably the person I want to see developed further the most though which is why I chose to talk about her for this blog.

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

#Honkai Star Rail #guinaifen #hsr #star rail

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tumblydovereviews · 1 year ago

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A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving- Does it Still Hold Up?

Ah, the American Thanksgiving. The one day of the year where it is socially acceptable to eat as many carbs as possible and watch as much football known to man.

A typical Thanksgiving for my family and I includes tuning in to the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade and gawking at the specially crafted floats, eating as much mashed potatoes, jollof rice, and pie as possible, and, sometime in-between the hustle and bustle, snuggling up and watching A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving.

The Peanuts have always held a special place in my heart. Ever since I was younger, I've been reading the books, laughing at the comics and watching all the specials like a die-hard fan. For a while, I considered The Peanuts Movie to be my all-time favorite movie, to the point where I even purchased a DVD of it. And, although my interest in Charlie Brown and Snoopy's escapades isn't as strong as it once was, I'm still happy to have considered these group of friends a crucial part of my childhood.

But enough about me. Is this special itself actually good? Outside of the rose-colored glasses everyone views childhood with, does A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving still manage to be the timeless classic critics consider it fifty years later?

A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving revolves around our titular, block-headed, down-on-his-luck guy who finds himself needing to host an impromptu Thanksgiving dinner for his friends after Peppermint Patty invites herself to his house, expecting a giant feast and party. Unfortunately, Charlie Brown and his family won't be in town for the festivities- they will be at their grandmother's house for the holiday. But not wanting to disappoint Peppermint Patty, Charlie Brown, his friend Linus, Snoopy, and Woodstock all work together to create as good as a Thanksgiving dinner as possible for both Patty and the two friends she's invited with her- Marcie and Franklin.

Charlie Brown's concept of a Thanksgiving dinner- buttered toast with popcorn, milkshakes and jellybeans on the side- offer only the simplicities that a child could. For Charlie Brown, Thanksgiving isn't all about the flourish and festivities- it's about spending time with his companions and making them happy. “I don’t feel bad for myself." He once says during the special. "I just feel bad because I’ve ruined everyone’s Thanksgiving."

Contrast that with Peppermint Patty, a more traditional type who believes in saying a prayer before the meal- which must consist of turkey, mashed potatoes, and pumpkin pie. Upon realizing that Charlie Brown's Thanksgiving feast contains none of those things, she berates 'Chuck' and leaves him in a state of regret.

Marcie, Peppermint Patty's wise and knowledgeable best friend, acts as a mediator to this conflict. While comforting Charlie Brown, she also explains that Peppermint Patty's harsh words didn't come from a place of malice but a place of love for him. Marcie goes on to explain how even if his life seems horrible at the moment, Charlie brown still has something to be thankful for- just being together with his friends.

"Thanksgiving is more than eating, Chuck. You heard what Linus was saying out there. Those early Pilgrims were thankful for what had happened to them, and we should be thankful, too. We should just be thankful for being together. I think that’s what they mean by ‘Thanksgiving,’ Charlie Brown.”

Nowadays, society is so focused on promoting wealth and consumerism that some have seem to forgotten the value of the holiday. According to Relevant Magazine, in 2014 alone, over half of the money Americans donated to churches in an entire year was used on Black Friday alone.

A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving challenges the stereotype of the 'perfect' holiday. Despite the limited food and the small amount of guests, after Patty warms up and apologizes to Charlie Brown, the kids are still able to enjoy the holiday, even singing on their way over to Charlie Brown's grandmother's house. The kids didn't need all the good food and items to have a good day- all they needed was the companionship of each other.

Not only does this special teach an especially relevant moral to this day, but it also contains a good amount of humor. The subtle nods to Charlie and Patty's relationship ("He's all yours, Priscilla!",) Snoopy casually creating an entire meal in a chef's outfit, and Woodstock and him eating pumpkin pie during the closing credits, this special still manages to put a smile on my face, even despite all of these years.

This year, Thanksgiving didn't go as planned for me. An unexpected event ended up derailing all of the plans my family had to celebrate, and although I wasn't too upset, a wave of inevitable, mild disappointment still washed over me. This special reminded me that novelty is better than monetary gain, which allowed me to still enjoy the holiday even despite the interruptions.

So, let's answer our question: does A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving still hold up? Yes, yes it does. In fact, the special's message has even managed to age better in the modern day. I'd highly recommend watching it if you are looking for a short, but fun watch to celebrate the holiday season.

Happy (belated) Thanksgiving, everyone!

#a charlie brown thanksgiving #charlie brown #peppermint patty #marcie #peanuts #thanksgiving #snoopy #woodstock #tumblydovereviews #linus

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harrison-abbott · 11 months ago

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The winds had quietened and they gambolled down the hill that

Had seen so many stories in atmospheres of hushed ivy and the

Night had an inky zone now on all that mattered most in the

Changing age. ………………………………………………….

In the old house that overlooked the hill the lights were still

Yellow from the strange isolated man that lived there with the

Shocked grey hair and the countless tales, too, that few were

Known about … only glimmer and glamour, secrets kept hard.

The foxes dallied across the roads by the nights and they

Were never going to be caught and they knew it and that’s

Why they even ventured out before midnight, why they muzzled

At the food bins outside the houses or the gardens in search

Of the cats or the mice, or whatever it is that these animals

Do – for you only ever see them within seconds and then nought.

The schools were back on in January nothingness; the mundane

Dreary walk up the motorway to the high school that

Looked like a building out of a true crime documentary …

The kids were angry that none of the storms had cancelled

The school days, yet; and thus they had to do the jaunts

In the lashing rain and blistering wind that had stopped the

Trains across the nation, had overlorded the news.

Christmas and Hogmany seemed like aeons ago even

Though it was only last month and there was little to go

On with 2024, as a year, save the casual mayhem that happened

On the radio or on one’s phone, with the occasional wowing

Event being one related to a soccer manager announcing his

Decision to vacate at the end of the season or some other

Thing that wasn’t nearly as important as war, except, was:

Only in a civilian way. …………………………………………….

Several of the trees had cracked and were destroyed by the

Storms and many of the folks would miss them because

There was nothing they could do about these giant shards of timber

Lying now on the fields of the park with their clear innards

Outside the gnarly bark and each of them wondered with ease

How easily such a brute branch could kill you if you stood under

It … if you’d been there during that moment in the carnage

When it quit the trunk and thundered down.

The cafes have slow businesses and there are various reports from

Week to week about restaurants shutting down, some of them joints

That have been alive for forty years in the city. And there’s not much

To rescue with such incidents, either. Oh, and even some of the

Watering holes, in this nation renowned for alcohol, have had to

Shut the doors also; and on social media these snapshots are met

With sad faces and what not, and it makes one wonder about

The fifty or so people that work in and around that particular

Venue and what on earth they will do for money now that their

Lives have changed. ………………………………………………

But the vans still hurtle buy delivering their parcels and folks

Still go to the supermarket in the busy times all the same.

Some of them even still stop to give the charity magazine seller

A coin or two outside of the revolving doors and when you go

Through said doors the heating in the building is ramped up full

And you sweat or your skin prickles because you’ve just come

Out of the cold and it’s fifteen degrees upgrade in here …

And there are young folks working in the market and there

Are older workers too who have been here, you know, for over

Twelve years. And they play pretty good tunes on the tannoids

High above and you can sing along in a civilian way as you

Go to get your stuff. And there’s this older chap who hasn’t

Worked in the place so long and he is always always always

Cheery and you wonder what gives him the zeal to be friendly

With other folks all the time. ………………………………………

Outside the supermarket the gulls are a bit twitchy and desperate.

And they have grown to picking on the gardens instead, up

In the suburbs, where the humans feed the seeds and bread to

The pigeons and blackbirds (the likable birds). But really it’s free

For any squirrel or rat, whomever, to come and rage at the output.

Following the latest storm, the wind has blown off the fencing

From several of the neighbourhood gardens as well and since

The residents are a bit older now they have hired other workers

To come fix it rather than try and hail up the fences themselves.

Which must be a sad fact to them, that they haven’t the physical

Verve anymore (although some of them are in their 70s, so no shame.)

Brave daffodils and bluebells poke from the fields and woods

In little miraculous pockets of colour, the way they always do;

And they are a cheerful sight indeed alongside the muddled streets.

III

The city is over half a million folks now which is quite a hefty

Number of people if you think about it and I remember when I

Was a kid it was about a hundred thousand less than that, and that

Makes me feel old and I suppose I am getting pretty old … and even

Though I’ve lived most of my life in a leafy suburb which is quite

Detached from Edinburgh, there even seethes this sense of quick-turning

Change, even here, in a place that never quite belonged to urbanity

From what I recall in youth. With the stark differences in the weather

And the way people act differently with technology, most things are

Moving far too fast and it didn’t move that way when you were a boy.

Or perhaps I’ve just come into the thirties with a shock, knowing I

Won’t live forever. Edinburgh is still alive, though, and I am too,

For now at least. Even though it’s night and black outside and lost

And changing, it still has an erratic pulse. ……………………………..

#writeblr #creative writing #writers on tumblr #tumblr writers #poets on tumblr #poetry #poems #prose poetry #stream of consciousness #spilled ink #spilled thoughts

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helpformylove · 5 months ago

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I'm worried my girlfriend is being abused.

Hi, i've made a new blog for this post as I don't want to share too much personal information.

for a bit of backstory, this post is about my gf, 14mtf, not me, as you can see by the title. she's not allowed to use social media and i'm concerned for her well being. some details may be inaccurate or vague but this is just from what i know.

at the surface she has pretty basic strict parents. can't close her bedroom door, cant use social media or download too many things on her phone, phone is heavily monitored, etc.

first issue i'll talk about mainly revolves around their impacts on her mental health. first off, as i stated before, she's trans. also bi. they're homo- and transphobic trumpies. not off to a great start. she has a younger sister who's 9 and the favorite child. her sis asks for something? no doubt she'll get it. she asks for smth? 50/50. favoritism is bad in general but it's just too much. hard to describe but it's wayy too obvious to say the least. it seems like they hate her. they yell a lot too. the slightest mistake will result in a harsh scolding, even if it's just something like forgetting to do the dishes. horrible for a kids mental health.

now, the physical stuff. the thing that has recently made me so concerned that i decided to make this post. for starters, my gf has not been taken to the dentist in years. she said she probably has a cavity and it hurts. not good. next, the food she's given. breakfast and lunch are always "find something" and during school, she buys lunch from there. for dinner, it seems to be the same thing or fast food most of the time. rarely eating out somewhere good or homemade food. meals usually include cereal, little bites muffins, bagel bites, pizza rolls, or snacks. not nutritious at all. now we'll talk about frequency and amounts of food. they tell her to stop eating so much. she is very skinny, not quite underweight though, has a bmi of 17.6. i feel like telling someone who's already built like a skeleton and trying to eat a healthy amount to stop eating isn't the best course of action?? especially when it's already obvious how much you eat fast food (gfs words, not mine). she's also yelled at whenever she complains about hunger or tries to go against this. last week my gfs parents didn't order groceries for days. she said she was struggling to find food in the house for about 3 days. when she finally got groceries, the only food she had to eat was white cheddar popcorn. not good in the long run. today, there were people coming to install lights in the cabinets. she wasn't allowed to go downstairs or eat while they were there, meaning she didn't get food for the whole day until around 2 pm. similar is said for when the family's cleaning lady comes by every other week, not allowed to get in her way. before she ate today, she said she was starting to shake, couldn't stand for long, could hardly move herself, was in pain, and barely had any energy.

there is obviously an issue here and i'm not sure how to deal with it. i don't want her to deal with this until she's able to move out but i don't know what would be the best course of action. i'm worried about her. If you don't have advice, the least you could do is reblog.

i don't want to seem so desperate but i really am. it feels like things keep getting worse for her and i don't want it to get too bad.

thank you so much for your time. if any more information is needed for a solution please tell me and i will ask my girlfriend about it. thank you again.

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checkoutmyflow · 11 months ago

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Star Elite: Archetypes They Hate

I recently made a Star Elite: Food Pet Peeves if you wanna go check that one out! This post is basically about the type of people they hate the most. Disclaimer: If you don't know Star Elite is my Blue Lock AU with my original characters. Here's the link so you can read up on it if you're interested.

Now onto the post!

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Fiorello Dal Lago: People who brag about being toxic. Are you proud of yourself? Honestly if you brag about doing awful shit or overall being a bitch, or try to justify it, he's never going to associate with you. Being mean as a joke is fine but being flat out toxic is where he crosses the line.

De'Andre Wilde: People who manipulate and try to make themselves the victim. He hates people like this so much. They know better than to try their mind games with him though, they know better.

Amari Wilde: People who shame others for having anxiety, or a certain disorder. Sometimes things happen to people that they can't just recover from. It's not so easy to forget the past, or just get over something as serious as a disorder. Yes, people with disorders should still be held accountable when they do something wrong, but if they need help then they shouldn't be chastised for needing help.

Xaivier Johnson: People who are super clingy. He likes his privacy, space, and overall antisocial. To add onto this, he has trust issues when it comes to people. He's not at all a people person. So it takes time for him to trust and actually open up, and he's not gonna do that if you're constantly trying to force him to talk about his feelings and invade his space and privacy.

Enkai Nakajima: Controlling parents. Let your kids have their own social life and interest. They're not your pets, they're human beings. If they're not doing anything incredibly weird and fucked up, why must you hover over them 24/7?? They're gonna go through phases and make mistakes, that's apart of life and growing.

Anselmo Espinoza: People who just disregard other people's feelings or straight up ignore them. If someone opens up about something and you ignore them or worse, make fun of them, you're a dickhead. Plain and simple. At least in his eyes you are.

Isaac Espinoza: People who try and one up everyone. Like we get it, you did this, you did xy and z... we don't care. Not everything has to be about you.

Vespa Richelieu: People who bring politics into everything. You can't have fun at all around them without them bringing up SOMETHING to do with politics. Literally he just wants to enjoy his day in peace chaos he does not want hear about global warming or elections or racism or sexism or whatever the fuck it is you want to talk about. There's a time and a place for this, and it's not around him.

Deong Daon: People who fake/lie about disorders. It's hard enough for people to take disorders seriously as is. Now you're making it harder for people to actually come out about this because you wanted attention. Also people who lie about traumatic experiences.

Elio Rossi: People who chastise other's dreams or your occupation. He himself is a streamer and has been told multiple times that it's a childish hobby and not a real job. For him it's a side job from his soccer career, but this still annoys him because many people have become extremely successful and influential in good ways by doing things like streaming. Or hell, just simply doing things they love. Even if said thing is weird, they're still making money, so why dictate them?

Alexander Bennett: People who make one thing their entire personality. Whether it's politics, mental illness, being LGBT+, feminism, being a vaper/smoker, being a certain person's fan, etc. People like this are insufferable to him. You couldn't make any friends or have a decent personality so instead you base it off of one thing and just revolve around that??

Lixue Bai: People who over-sexualize things that don't need to be sexualized. Examples being: women, gay men, certain body parts, breast feeding, ethnicities such as Japanese people, eating popsicles, etc. Literally not everything a person does is for your fucking satisfaction. Get a grip.

Axel Hart: People who have zero self awareness. Yes, Axel can be a energetic, loud, blunt, and teasing. The only difference is that he can admit that and knows when to tone it down. He can't understand how some people are so blind to how they act and think they're this perfect person.

Seia Morikawa: People who take advantage of other's generousity. People wonder why he has trust issues, it's because of shit like this. Other's decide to be kind and the world has to ruin it for their own gratification.

Carnell Reid: People who think they're entitled for something. How he was raised, you had to work for what you wanted. So when he sees someone who acts like they don't have to work for something or always expect something for free, it irks him.

Bruce Matthews: People who complain about every. Little. Fucking, Thing. Like you could easily fix this but instead you just continue to bitch and moan about it. Shut up, if it's fixable then fucking fix it, stop whining about it in hopes that it gets better. That helps literally NO ONE.

Amador Shimizu: People who are inconsiderate. He's not an aggressive person but please believe he'll actually gut check you if you do shit like leave your trash everywhere, being late to everything, or put very little to zero effort into anything. Like did your mother not teach you manners!?? Also FYI: BEING LATE TO EVERYTHING IS NOT A PERSONALITY TRAIT.

Omair Rosario: People who can't put themselves in other people's shoes. Sometimes people aren't blessed with the opportunities you have. It doesn't give you the right to ridicule them because of it.

Emeterio Narvaez: People who ruin the fun for everyone. He can understand if you're going through something, hell, he'll try and take you out to make you feel better even if you don't want to (It doesn't have to be somewhere public. Movie nights at home exist for a reason). But people who just.. fuck up stuff for everyone and kill the vibe. Especially if they're just overall bitchy.

Y'all tell me your pet peeves if you wanna, or if you agree with any of the character's pet peeves. I hope y'all are having a good night. Bye now :)

#blue lock #blue lock oc #original characters #my headcanons #pet peeve #comment please #i'm lonely #i'm boreeeed #do you agree

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seriouslysnape · 4 years ago

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The End of the Week

Cedric Diggory x Fem! Reader

Warnings: Language. Slight sexual implications.

Word Count: 1,856

A/N: Requests are still being written! I’ve just had this idea foreverrrrr. I gotta show my golden boy some love. I don’t even know what to name this.

“Hey! It’s just hot in here.”

Cedric was as perfectly content as he could possibly be in this moment. He couldn’t even begin to imagine something better than where he was right now. You were curled up next to him, and the way your head was nuzzled into his neck was spreading extra warmth all over his body with each gentle exhale through your nose onto his skin. The Hufflepuff common room was as still and quiet as could be, considering that everyone else had gone to bed for the evening.

It had been a hectic week for the both of you. Your schedules had been overcrowded with long Quidditch practices and impossibly difficult exams all while trying to throw in some social time into the balance. You hadn’t seen much of each other that week, only sharing loving glances when you passed in the halls or stealing quick kisses and small conversations between classes.

The end of the second term was just around the corner, which meant that your workloads would only increase until it was time to leave for summer break. Cedric had made it a priority to spend every free moment that he had with you. He was hoping for you to spend summer vacation with him and his family, but in case his plans fell through, he wanted to be sure to see you as much as possible.

Friday night had presented a break in the week’s chaos, both of you jumping on the opportunity like a hungry cat on a frightened mouse. Cedric basically snatched you out of your last class of the day when his Quidditch practice was canceled, which opened up his entire evening. The two of you were practically running hand in hand as your feet involuntarily made their way to his prefect room, the serenity and silence of it was calling your names.

Cedric had tossed you onto his bed, attacking you with sweet kisses and doing everything he could to draw laughter out of you. Not being able to be with you or touch you over the course of his stressful week had been killing him. You were his comfort, his single source of solace when life became too much for him. He always felt a little piece of himself missing when he strayed from you for too long.

Cedric had shown no mercy when your waist was between his knees as he tickled and teased at your sides and wherever else he knew you were ticklish. The sound of your happy giggles were music to his ears, which is how he could never bring himself to stop until your lungs were gasping for air and you were desperate with your pleas.

“Ced, stop!” You shrieked through strained laughs.

Cedric’s smile never left his face as he withdrew his hands, chuckling lightly as you wiped the tears of laughter from the corners of your eyes.

“I’m sorry, sweet girl. I’ve just missed you.” He admitted, lowering his head and kissing you again once you had caught your breath.

You smirked under his soft lips, bringing a hand to cup his cheek. His heart fluttered at the feeling of your thumb stroking his slightly flushed skin and the way you pushed him onto his back to deepen your kissing.

“I’ve missed you too. I hate this time of year.” You remarked, resting your chin on his chest.

Cedric’s hand was resting on the back of your thigh, his fingertips fiddling with the hem of your skirt.

“Oh, come on. You love springtime.” Cedric corrected.

“Yeah, I love seasonal allergies that kick my ass every year,” You grumbled sarcastically; “I mean because we hardly see one another this time of year.”

A knowing sigh fell from Cedric’s mouth, allowing his hand beginning to run lazily across the exposed skin on your leg.

“I know. But we have summer to look forward to,” He mewled; “You know it gets so hot at home that you have to strip down to next to nothing...” Cedric purred.

With a shocked gasp, your arm swung out to playfully smack his shoulder at what he was insinuating.

“Cedric Diggory!”

He laughed with his usual hearty, light voice, gripping you under your arms and pulling you up next to him from where he was lounged up on his pillows.

“What? I can’t think about my pretty girlfriend wearing nothing but her knickers?” He teased, kissing softly on your neck.

“Not if we’re going to be staying with your family. You have to keep your hands to yourself when they’re around.” You instructed.

Instinctively, your hand came to the back of his head and your fingers buried in his fluffy hair to direct him to your more sensitive areas on your neck. Cedric hummed happily, securing that you were flush with his body and entwining one of your legs between his.

“Quick nap before dinner?” Cedric suggested, noting that dinner was in an hour and a half.

You perked up at that, eagerly snuggling up to him ever further and draping the covers over the two of you. You and Cedric were exhausted. You could feel the tiredness creeping its way into your bones, and even Cedric’s muscles were much more tense than usual. A small power nap was definitely in order.

“Yes, please.”

Cedric wrapped his arms around you, his warmth cascading over you in a heavenly way. You were out like a light, your eyelashes fluttering every few minutes or so. Inky darkness had begun to paint the sky over Hogwarts, making the half-moon much more visible as stars began appearing alongside it. Cedric had to wrestle you out of bed, fighting your begs for five more minutes under his warm sheets, because he knew good and well you’d stay curled up for the rest of the night if he didn’t get you up now.

Once you were dragged away from your slumber sanctuary, he persuaded you to follow him to The Great Hall for dinner, walking with your fingers interlaced and whispering sweet nothings to one another.

You and Cedric had very well become the power couple of your year. If Cedric was around, then you likely weren’t far away. Adolescence wasn’t an easy stage of life for anybody. Cedric considered himself lucky every single day that he had someone to take the journey with him. You and Cedric had blossomed into incredible young adults together, braving the wizarding world with the other in tow.

Cedric’s future revolved around you, and there wasn’t a single aspect of his life that he hadn’t made sure you were a part of. He had decided long ago that he wanted to marry you soon after graduation. Later down the line, he wanted to have little Diggory kids running around with your eyes and his hair. His life was yours, and yours was his.

You had protested going to dinner because staying cuddled up with Cedric sounded much better than choking down chicken for the fifth time in a week. But Cedric told you that he wanted you to get some food in your belly before any more shenanigans, so denying you kisses until you had eaten supper was the only way to put his foot down.

He swept you away once you had both eaten, carrying you off into the Hufflepuff common room. Cedric usually would hang around the common room after dinner to make sure that no one was out after curfew, or until he was too tired to care anymore. Cedric never put too much energy into keeping an eye on mischievous Hufflepuffs, considering there weren’t many anyways and they were always far sneakier than Cedric could keep up with.

Hufflepuffs of all ages straggled in and up the separated staircases to their dorm rooms, some of them sauntering past you and Cedric and some stopping to rant about their stressful week. Turns out that you weren’t the only ones who had been through the wringer.

It was late now, you and Cedric being the only ones still up and energized from your nap a few hours ago. Cedric was soaking up every second of this moment, not wanting to forget this feeling in his heart. If he could end every day like this then he’d be the happiest man on Earth.

“It’s a Hogsmeade weekend,” You announced, carefully breaking the silence; “You want to go tomorrow and I’ll buy you a Butterbeer?”

Cedric snorted and looked down at your huddled frame, amusement clear on his face.

“Since when have I ever let you buy me anything? As long as I’m breathing, I pay for meals.” He proclaimed.

“It’s a Butterbeer. I’d hardly consider it a meal,” You said; “I just want to spoil you like you do me.”

The bubbly laughter that came from the Hufflepuff boy’s chest sent a flash of care through your cells, your heartbeat speeding up at the sound of his joy.

“Oh, but I love spoiling you. I have to take care of my favorite girl.” He confessed.

A hot rush went straight to your cheeks, a shy smile appearing on your face that Cedric couldn’t possibly miss. His lips left a small kiss on your cupid’s bow, his voice lowering in the sweetest way.

“After all these years I still know how to make you blush.” He noted with a grin.

“You are very charming, Ced,” You complimented, fidgeting with the collar of his sweater; “And handsome.”

Now it was his turn to blush, his cheeks flooding red with a bashful smile. He caught your look of entertainment, and he was quick to defend himself.

“Hey! It’s just hot in here.” He half-lied, motioning towards the crackling fire in the fireplace just a few feet in front of you.

“Is it now?” You laughed, crawling over and placing a knee on each side of him. Your hands rested on his shoulders, a shudder going down your spine at the feeling of his grip on your hips. Your lips just barely brushed over his, a new mood taking over the room; “It is getting rather warm in here...”

Cedric let out a groan of temptation when you kissed him and rolled your pelvis into his, creating the most delicious friction. It didn’t take long for Cedric to dominate over you, pushing you into the cushions of the sofa and pinning you underneath him. His lips were hot wherever they sucked or left kisses, his aura and familiar feel was your favorite thing ever.

“I’ve always wanted to make love to you here.” He mumbled, removing his belt from his pants before pushing your skirt up past your hips.

His hair fell onto his forehead in soft tufts when he lowered himself again to look down at the girl he had fallen so in love with. The only person he’d ever truly love with every ounce of his being.

“I love you.” He murmured passionately as he always did.

“I love you, Ced.” You returned.

His kisses and touches resumed, arousal growing and hearts beating with one another’s. It was a perfect moment.

And an even better way to make up for lost time.

#cedric diggory #cedric diggory x reader #cedric diggory x female reader #cedric diggory fanfiction #cedric diggory x you #cedric diggory x y/n #cedric diggory imagine #cedric diggory blurb #cedric diggory oneshot #seriouslysnape

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angsty-omi · 4 years ago

Text

arms tonite

fuckboy!atsumu miya x fem!reader

genre: angst, unrequited love,

cw: suggestive content, swearing, heartbreak

word count: 1.5 k

Different girl every night and no repeats; that was the rule of law Atsumu Miya lived by. Whether it was Asians, Whites, or Black girls he didn’t discriminate. If they had a beating heart and a pussy then he was set. Hearing about these conquests as his best friend, really made you think ‘wow who’s the poor that let Atsumu put his dick in that night?’ And as you would find it, soon enough it’d be you.

Media portrayal of college students, especially in movies, falsely portrayed college students and gave unrealistic ideas of how they live. These media outlets give impractical ideas of what college students are- intense party seekers, people who have all the time in the world, or just lazy nonworking students who revolve everything around their social lives. This was, by all means not true.

You, and many other diligent college students, can attest to this. The heavy number of finals and research papers due would soon drown you in your sleep. To prevent you from feeling overwhelmed, you always went to him. The one person who could talk your ear off, which though annoying, kept your mind off things, Miya Atsumu. See, Atsumu had the ultimate college experience. The ones that occurred on screen, the ‘intense party seeking’ events where somehow your invite was always lost in the mail. Every Wednesday, you’d always fit him into your schedule for brunch, which mostly consisted of him talking about the ‘new freshman babes’ at the Inarizaki Frat House, and you lived vicariously through him, not because you were envious of his lifestyle, rather, you were just interested in what could’ve been.

“Did you get that Y/N?” Your thoughts were interrupted.

“U-uh, yeah! Of course, I did.” You tried playing it off, but Atsumu could see right through you. He knew all your mannerisms, for example, when you bite your lip, it’s a sign that you’re prepared for a big change or if you handball your T-Shirt, you’re feeling insecure. He could tell you had something weighing in on you, but he decided to ignore your blatant lie and wait for you to tell him.

“So, are you gonna tell how you’ve been doin’?” He lightly asked.

“Yeah, uh life has been hard for me… I guess. It’s just that- with all these finals I am feeling so overwhelmed,” you buried your face in your hands to attempt forgetting about school. Knowing Atsumu, he would just drown out your sorrow, or so you thought. You continued, “I can’t eat, sleep, or you know-,” not even acknowledging the fact you just referred about your inability to get off. Atsumu became was suspiciously quiet.

“What,” you furrowed your eyebrows. “Nothing, Nothing,” he shook his head, chuckling.

“No, seriously what’s so funny?”

“You really want to know?”

“Yes.”

“Ya’ reeeaaaallly want to know?”

“I said yes already, just spit it out,” you irritated with anticipation.

“I could help your little issue down there,” Atsumu grinned. Studying? When has Atsumu Miya ever wanted to study with you? The only reason he got into this school was because he was a D1 athlete. Unless, he turned a new leaf and he chose a path where you don’t slap a ball back and forth because quite frankly you thought that it was risky caree- Oh. That little issue. “You’ve got to be kidding, I would never,” you felt offended. It wasn’t that he was ugly, it was quite the opposite. He had a charming personality, while also being built like a Greek God, and with a face like that it’s no wonder these girls fall for him. However, you felt too prideful to sleep with him. Sure, you may have some underlying feelings for him that you shut down deep inside, but you didn’t want to be treated like a human toy. So, that thought was always out of the question.

“Never say n-” He was interrupted with his corny ringtone.

“Hello?... Yeah, I’m free, right now… Alright, see you then.”

Atsumu always did this, it was like clockwork. He’d bail on you when you clearly were in distress and he could not even prioritize time to listen. He even, left you with the check. Sure, he’d Venmo you afterwards, but it still hurt nonetheless. On the walk back to your dorm, your thoughts were full of cursing Atsumu out for always bailing on you. Holding it in for so long only lasted you so much before you exploded.

That night, Atsumu came over, not even expecting your wrath.

An hour in, and he still couldn’t understand your argument. “Atsumu, if you could just.. I don’t know- not bail on me? Cause you know, it’s common courtesy!” You exclaimed.

“Dude, it was literally just a few times, I don’t know why you’re getting so upset?”

“Upset? Upset? Upset is an understatement. How would you feel if I dropped you for some dick?”

“Like that would ever happen. C’mon, Y/N, you’re acting like my girlfriend and I’m uncomfortable.” He blurted, frustrated that this argument has lasted almost two hours. He just rejected you, and you didn’t even get the chance to even address those feelings.

“Get out.”

“You know I didn’t mean it that way.”

“I don’t care, get out.” You wiped a treacherous tear from your eye. You opened the door, and gestured him to leave. But, he just stood there. Moving over to him in tears, you tried to push him out. Your measly arms were incomparable to his toned abs that he’s built since high school. He grasped your arms, and for a moment you could feel his padded thumb, wiping your cheek. Your faces were only a few inches away. This was your chance to get a taste of him, before he turned into a stranger. You leaned in his lips.

The lack of return made your heart drop. You let go and rambled with apologies,“I-I’m so sorry. Look, I-” He shut you up with another kiss, more passionate than yours. “I told ya’ I could fix that little issue of yours.”

The morning after, you woke up with your body aching in pain. Drool all over your chin, and in disgust, you wiped your mouth and skimmed your calendar. ‘The biomedical final isn’t at 10, it’s at 8-’ whispering to yourself. Your heart dropped to the pit of your stomach. Then, you slowly gazed at your alarm clock, ‘7:57 AM’ it read.

“Shit! Shit! Shit!” you screamed to yourself. Without thinking, you dashed out the door and sped to the testing center. At the entrance, your professor met eyes with you. “Testing entry is closed, I thought you were better than this, Y/N.” Scolding you up and down. I only missed the final by a couple of minutes, why is she shunning me? You thought. But before you could continue, you looked down. There you were, love marks all over, in your panties and an oversized T-shirt to top it off.

You rushed into your dorm, to find the vampire who did this to you. The universe was seemingly against you once more, because on your way over to your bedroom, you slipped on a textbook. How ironic. The loud slam woke him up, making him sit upright. “Oh my God Y/N are you okay?” He said with a concerned look on his face.

“Why the fuck are you still in my bed?”

“Well if you wanna know the details-” He smirked, “No no no, I’m okay,” you interrupted him. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to understand what went on.

You felt blood drip on your upper lip. Both of you just stared in shock. Immediately, he swiped you up, bridal style, and plopped you onto the sink. He stood in between your legs, soaking your nose with numerous amounts of toilet paper. There was a comfortable silence in the air. You know, Atsumu was quite beautiful with his mouth closed. The way the sunlight accentuated his sharp features, with his eyes reflecting a shade of light hazel. In an impulse, you pecked his lips and to your surprise, he reciprocated.

It’s been a month since you’ve been hooking up and it’s become your new normal. As a small treat, you wanted to do surprise.

Prior to this dynamic, as best friends you always had a spare key, which his twin brother made sure of because Atsumu was forgetful. As tacky as it was, you were wearing a trench coat, that covered your bright red two-piece lingerie underneath. Silently twisting the knob, you walked into to his bedroom. The apartment was still clean, signaling that he wasn’t home. In which, gave you enough time to position yourself on his bed. After many awkward attempts of seductive positions, you chose the cross-over leg at the edge of his bed, which accentuated your hips.

You heard his front door open, and his loud voice gave you the signal. You felt relaxed, but it wasn’t until you heard another voice. High-pitched and fruity, it was one of those voices you could tell it’d belong to a pretty girl. You panicked, and mentally scolded yourself for pushing Atsumu to go with a minimalist aesthetic for his bedroom, which left nowhere to hide for you. The knob was opened slightly, where only he could see you. Eye contact was made, and he immediately slammed the door shut.

There was a muffled, “Hey! uh- my room is kind of dirty right now. Let’s go over to yours.” And after, hearing the front door shut, you assumed she complied. In awe, you mentally kicked yourself over and over again. You took off your attire immediately walking into your bedroom, it burned your skin with insecurities and embarrassment. So much for putting yourself out there. Although, what hurt the most was the way his eyes were full of disgust when he saw you.

That night, he knocked at your door. You opened it, thinking it was your food.

Your heart was beating rapidly, because just an hour ago you made a whole scheme of routes to take without seeing him. You coyly responded with, “you’re not my DoorDash,” and tried to close the door. But he blocked it.

“We need to talk,” he said in the most serious tone you’ve personally ever heard from him. How could those words scare you when you’re not in a relationship.

“What was that shit you pulled earlier?” He irritated. You felt so small under his gaze.

“I thought it would’ve been nice,” you mumbled. “Nice? That girl was the president of one of the most notorious sororities. She could’ve seen you.” He yelled, continuously blaming you. The way he viewed her, would never be the way he saw you. You were just a friend who needed a favor, not someone he actually wanted to pursue.

“You know what? Fine, my fault. Sorry that I ruined it, sorry that I showed up, sorry that I even planned it, sorry I ever thought that you saw me more than just a skank, sorry I even called you over that night, and finally, sorry for ever loving-” it just slipped out. His eyes widened, “Finish that sentence, Y/N. If I knew-”

“Knew what? Knew that I loved you, you wouldn’t have gotten involved? Yeah, well it’s too late. You know what? Just get out. I never want to see you again, Miya,” you sobbed, tears flowing down your face freely. Pounding your fists against his chest. His immobility gave you a small sliver of hope.

“I’m not ready, Y/N. I can’t give you what you want.” Conflicted, unbeknownst whether he was talking to you or himself. “But we can still be friends.”

That sentence was the nail in the coffin.

“It hurts to even look at you Atsumu.” Your voice cold. For someone that could read you so well, why did he think that would save your relationship? “I’ll.. be on my way then.” He slowly got up, and turned the knob. Selfishly enough, he made one more glance at you. He embraced this last glance. Did you know you were beautiful? Even with snot, running down your nose. Of course, you didn’t look back, you were too focused on biting your lips.

Atsumu’s face went pale. He knew what sign that meant. And the change was him. You were really set on ghosting him. With the door closed and Atsumu leaning on it, he couldn’t help to question why that made a pang in his heart.

#haikyuu angst #haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu fluff #atsumu x female reader #atsumu angst #atsumu fluff #atsumu x reader #haikyuu x reader

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jjyusmile · 4 years ago

Text

enchanting | hwang inyeop

pairing: badboy!hwang inyeop x {gender-neutral} reader

genre: fluff, suggestive

warnings: suggestive nature, alcohol, an almost accident, fwb if that makes you uncomfortable!

word count: 5.1k

taglist: @katinthemoon

A/N: happy true beauty season finale day! I hope you enjoy this dedication to our favourite second lead <33 give inyeop lots of love on his socials because he deserves it!!

»»——————————-——————————————-««

you couldn’t help but think to yourself.

was it the way he walked? the way he held his head so high that his fluffy hair almost touched the clouds? was it the way he thought the world revolved around him? his cocky aura screaming ‘look at me! look at me!!’?

and yet, he was nothing like you had imagined. saying that second “yes” completely warped your world – how much longer can I stick to this friend with benefits thing?

the thought spurred a memory of how you first met. somehow… you ended up in his clutches. he was the boy who wandered the corridors, his disciples in toe, and nobody could touch him. except somehow… you did. well, kind of.

you remember it clear as day. it was a thursday night, your fluffy socks rested against the hard wood of your coffee table in front of you as you chatted on facetime to your parents. when your stomach grumbled, so loud that maeum, your fluffy chow-chow, lifted her head from against the armrest with curiosity as to wear the sound came from. such inquisitive eyebrows for a nonchalant pup that barely batted an eyelash unless you were filling her dinner bowl.

“even we heard that…” your dad’s smile filled the screen, a light teasing in his tone. you thought to yourself when the last time you ate was… it hadn’t been today.

“why don’t you head out and grab something good for yourself from the convenience store? I know you don’t cook for yourself, my baby.” your mother’s disapproving tone caused your eyes to roll -- miles away and she still nagged about the fact you ate nothing but instant noodles if you could be bothered.

“okay, ma. I’ll go do that. thank you for your concern.” short and snappy, your patience wore thin. probably because she was right and you were absolutely ready to devour some food.

a few air kisses later, and you were gliding the zipper up to just beneath your nose, the sherpa material insulating all heat it could as you brace yourself for the bitter cold. maeum’s tail wiggled excitedly in anticipation, her harness wrapped snuggly against her fur. “come on then,” you giggled at the way she span around energetically as you unlocked your front door. she practically knew the route to the convenience store by now… for a 6-month old chow, she was very intuitive.

out the door. down the hall. press the call button and wait for the elevator with patience. get into the elevator (you had to carry her if it was too busy but she didn’t mind too much). leave your apartment complex and turn left and keep going until the bright lights of the store appeared with a ��fresh food prepared daily’ sign like a saving grace.

the owner didn’t mind of maeum came into the store, often bending down to give her treats and pets. maeum always leaned into anyone’s affection. it was her favourite time of day.

your airpods blasted your hype playlist, something you did when you needed self-reassurance. walking out of the store, maeum in toe, you rummaged through your bag of snacks, pulling out one of the many samgak kimbap you picked up. the crisp evening put you off sitting outside with a hot meal, plus maeum would attract too many people for your isolated personality to handle. the coo’s and aww’s often got worse as the night went on.

it wasn’t too long of a journey home, but something about the evening air caused you to walk slower and appreciate the serene surroundings. high school kids stumbling out of the noraebang that you often frequented in your days. being drunk on sugary snacks and endless cokes while you sang your little heart out. the snack in your hand tasted almost nostalgic as you remembered the nights you sat for hours outside the convenience store, hoping a kind stranger might sneak you a bottle or two of soju. those were the days you had friends to hang out with, but since you moved closer to seoul for university, they hadn’t bothered to keep in contact. you spent your days sitting alone in class, hoping your professor wouldn’t tell you to pair yourselves up. you were the only person that sighed in relief when they mentioned that they’d pre-assigned partners.

a low growl sounded over your music, with maeum halting in her tracks. it was only as maeum barked so loudly that you paid attention to what was happening. the bike headed straight for you. the rumble of its engine overwhelmed you as you realised you had stepped into the road without checking for oncoming traffic. yelping, you jumped back, pulling maeum abruptly, just quick enough for her to be missed. but it sent you flying onto your ass, a dull throb aching at the impact.

“are you okay?!” a shout from the direction of the motorbike filled your ears, the engine shutting off and footsteps getting closer.

“I’m fine,” you huffed, using your arms to twist your body with difficulty. your tailbone really throbbed as your face morphed into instant regret. you were turning to face the person clad in a helmet and biker jacket that hugged their body tightly in the frosty air.

“umm - I wasn’t talking to you.” you could just make out their eyes in the gap, slightly squinted in apprehension. when they turned their attention to maeum, you realised that look wasn’t for you. maeum, who sat sweetly with her tail wagging, front paws perched on their knees began to lick the helmet off them, only finding purchase in the gap that showed their mysterious eyes. traitor.

it was only when you heard the low chuckle that your attention turned back to the owner of the bike, heart stopping in its tracks for a small second. they reached out to ruffle the abundance of fur that framed maeum’s face, carefully checking for any scrabs or marks from the almost accident.

“hey there, friend! i’m sorry I almost hit you,” their tone emphasised the frown hidden by their helmet. it was only then did they reach up to lift the helmet off their head. and the breath you were about to let out hitched in your throat.

this mysterious biker wasn’t a stranger. he was the notorious bad boy that walked your universities halls, his minions in toe and never batted an eyelash to anyone who showed an interest in him. the one whose name you feared would be called out after yours in pairing for a class project. the one who probably didn’t even know you existed.

he was hwang in-yeop. and your bulging eyes that almost fell out of their sockets told him that you knew that already.

but, little did you know that the moment his leg flung off his bike to check you were okay, he realised who you were too. the one who sat at the front of the class with their pencil knocking in a continuous rhythm against the desk, a sound he realised rang inches louder in his mind compared to the rest of the class. he noticed the way your eyes glistened as you focused on what your professor was saying. he also figured out you never paid attention to anyone else, you sat alone with no intention to allow anyone into your bubble unless they were forced to. he actually hoped his name would be called out after yours.

his question of concern died in his throat when he saw it was you. those glistening eyes still sparkling despite the obvious annoyance in your expression. so he trailed off to pay attention to the adorable fluff beside him, luckily he adored dogs.

your embarrassment flushed in the apples of your cheeks, the heat almost melting the rim of your glasses that rested against the bridge of your nose. “maeum - come on, leave him alone.”

you lifted yourself up, trying not to show the pain. gathering your spilt snacks back into the bag, you stood up stretching your legs. but it difficult not to look at inyeop. his head was tilted slightly as he gazed up at you, this time the apprehension focused on you. was he concerned? he should be! he almost knocked you over!!

quickly, he stood himself, handing maeum’s fallen harness back to you.

“thanks,” you took it back quickly.

“you’re welcome.” his attention was still focused on maeum, who was jumped up at the bag in your hand hoping there was something inside for her.

the silence was excruciating. in the two years you’d known each other, this was the first time any contact had been made. and it was almost unbearable.

“uhhh- thanks again, sorry we almost got you into an accident,” you tried again, reaching into your bag to pick out a snack to give him as a peace offering. although he annoyed you, you realised you should’ve been looking where you were going - at least for maeum.

he took the can that laid flat on your palm slowly, afraid you were just teasing. but you let him take it without reluctance.

“do you- uhh…” he started.

“hmm?” your head raised sharply to turn your attention to him, the snacks in your bag long forgotten.

“do you… do I.. know you?” he tried again. if he was nervous, you could barely sense it. although he was stumbling over his words, his eyes were narrowed in scrutiny, analysing your every feature. he knew exactly where he knew you from, the flick of your pen ringing in the back of his mind. any excuse to keep you beside him longer.

“probably… you’re in my criminology class. although I doubt you’ve ever actually paid attention to anything in that class, let alone me.”

he scoffed, eyes rolling up into the heavens. you really were bold. “that’s quite the assumption.” a smirk so prominent it has sketched its way into your brain, all the way down to the subtle shading of the dimples that outlines the corners of his lips.

you ignored him, focusing on maeum for a moment as she sat beside your feet in a fluffy ball, eyes glittering expectantly at inyeop. you followed her gaze, landing specifically on the creases that lined his eyes as he analysed you. you huffed. “which way are you headed?”

he tilted his head to look over your shoulder at his bike sitting idly on the side of the road. “well, before I was interrupted I was on my way to a party.” and then his eyes met yours. “why? do you want to come?” his signature smirk appeared, the one you caught glimpses of every so often.

you hesitated, the thought of being anywhere remotely sociable filling you with dread. you became nervous in seconds “I- uhh. I was going to say I’d treat you to dinner because of the accident I almost caused…” you were shy, you admit. he couldn’t understand how someone who can barely look him in the eye could be so bold.

your offer caused his heart to do a single backflip; that was more of a reaction than any other, he couldn’t recall this kind of reaction from anyone else. to say the least, he was intrigued by the person who sat at the front of class. “do me a deal.”

“hmm? a deal?” shimmering eyes, etched into his mind.

“you treat me to dinner, and I’ll take you to the party.”

he was met with silence, searching your eyes as you lulled over the thought in your head. right now?

it was almost like he could read your mind. “we could make it a recurring thing… you can make up for me almost hurting not only you but this gorgeous ball of fluff” your heart leaped when he crouched down to rub between maeum’s ears with affection, even more so when he looked back up at you. “… and I’ll teach you how to be sociable.”

“oooh! kinda like a friends with benefits thing?!” you grinned, excited by the fact that you may not have to feel so alone anymore.

his grin widened at your exclaim, certain you weren’t sure exactly what you had just said… “sure… like friends with benefits… are you in?”

and that was how you ended up in the clutches of the notorious bad boy.

»»——————————-——————————————-««

those around you witnessed a flourishing friendship; you were attached at the hip. your five o’clock walks by the beach were met with his bubbly personality, maeum pleased with having someone else to chase the waves with. you finally had someone to sit beside in class, his signature smirk plastered on his face as the whispers of students wondered who on earth their designated bad boy was sat beside.

it got to the point that you remember the little things. he always ordered extra cheesey tteok because you always added extra onto your own. you packed extra heat packs when you knew he’d be joining you. he started turning up three minutes early because he knew that was how long it took you to get from your apartment to the lobby, where he’d be waiting for you with an extra coffee for you in hand. he knew to wear an extra sweater to the party because you always left without a jacket and would complain of the cold despite the countless shots you had consumed. you noticed that when his foot began to tap as the horrifically drunk girl in front of him continued to run her hand down his bicep, he wanted out, so you always stepped in to play the jealous ex.

as the little things continued to build up, your feelings flourished alongside them.

not that you ever did anything about them.

until one night it was clear that things weren’t as they used to be. inyeop had dragged you into an unoccupied room at the party, away from the sleaze who was hitting on you.

“what the fuck are you doing?!” you cursed, something you didn’t usually do. it must’ve been the alcohol that coursed through your veins, and the slight haze that the drunk guy’s breath washed over you.

“what am I doing?! what were you just doing out there?!” he grabbed your arm again, you swayed slightly, trying really hard to focus on his eyes.

you smiled at his tone, it was flittered with desperation. “why… what was I doing?”

he couldn’t fight off the annoyance that washed over him at the light smirk that graced your lips. you had been spending far too much time with him, his cockiness was starting to rub off on you.

“you were literally throwing yourself all over that guy!! everyone was watching you!!!” although he knew you weren’t stable on your feet, he shook your shoulders with emphasis.

and the moment you may have changed everything. his face was so close to yours that you could feel his exasperated breath against your cheekbones.

“were you watching?” you shot back.

his eyes widened so much his eyes almost bulged out of their sockets. “what…”

it came out as a whisper, so quiet you almost didn’t hear it. his eyes began to glisten, the only hint of innocence he could ever show. you turned his world upside down more than he could have ever imagined.

“I was just having fun, yeop.” your taunting was over.

his head shook abruptly like he was trying to shake the thoughts from his mind. your finger reached up to tap the tip of his nose, the bright smile forming on your lips was impossible to not mirror.

he sighed drastically, a giggle escaping your throat. “can we just go back now… I’ll drop you home. I want to see maeum.”

and like that, you were being dragged out of the house quicker than your feet could keep up. along the way, he had slid his leather jacket over your shoulders as he always did. the walk home was silent as you matched your steps along the path. the low hum of the city began to sober you up, inyeop quietly singing to himself.

since that first party on the night he almost crashed into you, inyeop made it a habit to walk you back. at first, you thought it was because he parked his bike outside your apartment complex. you soon realised there was a caring side behind his bad boy facade that kept everyone else hooked. they clearly didn’t see the soft bean that was for your eyes only. he had become your best friend, and he cared about you just as much as you did him.

he sensed your aura change from beside him, head turning to see the smile light up your face. “what are you grinning about?” his own lips quirked in response to your happy expression.

“not much… just remembering the night you almost sent me and maeum flying.”

he halted abruptly. “hey! you admitted that night was entirely your fault!”

you held your hands up in mocking surrender, “okay! okay… I did admit that…”

he went silent for a moment. and then said something that shocked you; not because of ill intentions, but because you finally realised that that night didn’t just change your life.

“I don’t regret it.”

his eyes were genuine. and you returned the small smile he offered in silent appreciation for one another.

and then the heavens opened.

the mad dash to your apartment was filled with laughter and shrieks from you both. feet slapping against the puddles on the ground as you passed through the lobby doors. your hair clumped in damp strands over your eyes as you began to ring out your damp clothing. inyeop’s jacket became heavy on your shoulders.

“you can’t go home in that. come up for a minute while it settles and you can dry off a little.”

his eyebrows wiggled suggestively in response earning a shove from you.

maeum was overly excited to see inyeop. almost as if you were scotch mist. as he crouched down to give her affection, you headed for your cupboard, pulling out a couple of warm towels for you both to dry off.

you found inyeop lying on his back by the front door, shoes half off with maeum lying on top of his chest giving him her utmost attention. he was mumbling away to himself and giggling.

“what are you laughing about?” the towel landed on his face, earning a scowl from his raindrop stained face.

he then started laughing to himself again.

“what?!” you exclaimed.

“nothing!” he defended, the smile still evident on his lips. you waited, eyebrow raised in questioning.

“it's just… what you said down there got me thinking about something.” you waited again, the silence beckoning more of an explanation for his madness.

he shrugged his sweater off, pulling it from the scruff of the neck over his head. one small flutter.

he proceeded to rush the towel through his hair, biceps flexing in the process. two small flutters.

the whole time, his eyes never flickered from yours. it was the ultimate taunting staredown that caused the third flutter.

you broke the silence first. “thinking about what?”

he neatly folded the towel and placed it over the back of the chair to dry off, his hair sticking up in all sorts of directions. in two quick strides, he was stood in front of you, toes touching and fingers reaching for the dry towel you held tightly in your clutches.

quietly, he ran the towel through your hair, careful to focus on drying it completely so that you didn’t get a cold. from just below his chin, you had the perfect view of his features as his eyebrows etched in concentration. you were dying to know what exactly was going through his mind. you cleared your through in an attempt to drag him out of his thoughts.

“well. downstairs you said something that reminded me of something you said before.” you nodded, indicating for him to elaborate. “when we first met, the night you walked out into the road. you asked me if we could be friends with benefits.”

a deep pink flushed in your cheeks as your hands flew up to cover them. his eyes met yours as the embarrassment washed over you. gotcha.

“I did not say that?!” you tried but the bellow that came from inyeop proved just how much he was enjoying seeing his best friend squirm. he knew back then exactly what you meant, but the thought that anything more could ever come between you haunted him since that day.

“that was what… half a year ago now. you were so innocent back then.” his hands dropped from drying your hair, but not within brushing under your chin quickly in taunt.

you were annoyed. you knew inyeop enjoyed teasing you but surely this was too far. your thoughts drew back to early that night when he pulled you away from the guy you had flirted with because you saw him watching. when you teased him, it was the only time you’d ever seen him hesitate. and you enjoyed it.

“I’m not innocent anymore,” you taunted. eyes narrowed into your own, inyeop focused on read your thoughts as he tried not to react. but he couldn’t help it. for the last few months, you played with each other until you almost crossed the line. but the thought of crossing the line, even just once, left a dull burning in his stomach.

“is that right?” he retorted, eyebrow raised as his face seemingly inched closer to yours.

“mmhm.” it was all you could say. your nose filled with the cologne he was wearing, it was a mix of warming vanilla, swirls of cinnamon and just… him. “how enchanting,” you muttered lowly, he didn’t hear anything.

he was too focused on the way your eyes flickered between his, searching for some kind of each. you were in the same position, you always were. seeing which one of you broke first. but he also knew it would be him. so then came his next words.

“okay… prove it.”

a gasp escaped your throat, a mixture of shock and a sudden craving for touch. “what?” it came out as a whisper.

“prove you’re not innocent. maybe we can expand on that friends with benefits deal we made.” he wasn’t holding back. he had done for far too long, constantly tiptoeing on the tension that could light up this entire apartment building.

your fingers inched closer to him, both for support in your knees that were about to buckle, but also with the overwhelming desire to make contact. his white tshirt clung perfectly to his torso. one night couldn’t hurt.

“okay,” you agreed. but held your hand up to his face quickly to stop him from leaning in. “but! it’s a one time thing. you said you could teach me things so we’ll treat it as that.” excuse after excuse poured out of you before you could stop it, fear that your feelings would multiply the moment his lips met yours.

his lips quirked slightly as he nodded in agreement. but as soon as he got a taste, it was like something was yelling from within, a burning desire that laid idly for so long threatening to overflow. his fingers grappled at the curve of your jaw to keep him grounded. your own pulled at the hem of his shirt, a silent begging for the moment you had both thought about but never acted upon.

your body flushed against his, he barely let go to pull his shirt over his head with one hand, the other planted in a grip at your waist. your lips parted momentarily only to be chasing after one another the moment the white material met the floor. he guided you blindly, knowing your apartment by the back of his hand, your lips locked in a desperate embrace.

the moment your knees hit the end of the bed, you fell backwards hitting the comforter softly. inyeop stood over you, quietly taking in your appearance below him. his eyebrow quirked with his signature smirk making an appearance.

“you sure you just want this to be a one time thing?” his fingers traced up your thigh in taunt.

you groaned and pulled him down to you, “shut up.”

and the night went on, whispers of affection, lips tracing across the plains of each other's skin as he showed you how the gods lived, and you proved to him your innocence melted away at the flick of his fingers. you decided then that you were wrong. it couldn’t be a one time thing. because the moment his lips reached for your own, any unease washed away as you were met with the melting pools of his eyes.

this was something only the two of you shared. the subtle touches and flirtation from the previous months finally adding up.

the clock flashed in the darkness, indicating that you were approaching the fourth hour of the day. inyeop’s fingers traced down your sides subconsciously as he pressed delicate kisses into your shoulder. you had laid in silence for what felt like hours, basking in each other’s warmth and sudden bursts of giggles as you reached for each other. you were wrapped up in everything about him - his delicate touch, his intoxicating scent, his plush lips that barely left any part of your body untouched.

it was him that broke the silence, pulling you to turn into his embrace, noses brushing as your heads rested against the same pillow. “that was fun.”

you giggled against his lips, his bluntness causing flowers to bloom in your chest. “it was.”

he exhaled slowly, fingers coming up to push your bangs away from your eyes, fingers grazing over your eyebrows. he realised his fingers moved subconsciously to smooth out the frown lines that were usually there… but were far from it in these early hours of the night.

“what do you think… about all this.” he questioned, hoping you didn’t regret the last few hours.

“it was… interesting.” you giggled as the worry on his face faded at your response. “we could… uh- make it a thing.”

“a thing?” he wiggled his eyebrows for the second time that night, suggestively hinting to you.

“yes, a thing.”

“like.. our thing?” his the pads of his fingers wandered the high points of your cheeks until he met your lips, brushing over them nonchalantly.

“sure. our thing.”

he was mesmerised by how your lips moved under his touch, silently scolding himself for not being this bold sooner. you were merely adding another layer onto your friendship, no strings attached.

but his eyes focused solely on your lips, the way they curved when you smiled, only at him. “how enchanting.” he whispered.

and that was how your arrangement began. best friends outside of these four walls. best friends with a twist the moment you stepped in through the door.

you often found yourself making excuses to remain in your apartment. simply sitting together and reading was enough for you, subtle touches coming with time as you tried to focus on the page in front of you.

but, trying to get his attention once he was engrossed in a book was difficult. you never expected the so-called bad boy to be a softy for mysterious quests and fending off evil. then again, that was one of the raging stereotypes inyeop constantly diminished.

maeum rested her head against his shoulder as she laid across the top of the sofa, tiny beige fur tickling his neck as she stretched out but he didn’t mind. maybe if you gave attention to maeum he might get a little jealous?

your intense stare, that was supposed to be for her, was often warped by the way his eyebrow quirked at a funny line, or his jawline sharpening abruptly as he stretched his neck from sitting in the same spot all day. his fingers grazing your ankle didn’t help the situation at all. until he caught you staring.

he lifted his head that was previously buried in Legends of Condor Heroes, his hand falling to his lap as he turned to you. his head hit the back of the sofa when his gaze pooled into your own; they glistened, his eyes, something it took you a long time to notice. he’d tell you it happened the moment you said yes… but you’d argue that it was there all along, the walls he built up disguising it from the world.

“what are you looking at?” he quipped, eyebrow raised as a subtle smirk rested on his lips. the way the corners turned up right at the edges formed a fuzzy feeling right in the pit of your stomach. and that’s why he did it - inyeop lived for the reaction he got from you.

“nothing,” you turned your head back to your own book. legs sliding back to your chest as you wrapped your arms around them; your chin rested against your knees while you tried to focus on the words on the page. you had his attention now – bingo.

a sudden jolt almost knocked you off the plush cushions, inyeop had lifted your feet to drape them back over his lap “where they belonged”. the novel he was so concentrated on before was now placed neatly on the armrest, the dog-ear bookmark on the corner resembling maeum’s. a small smile washed over his features when he realised what you were doing, fingers reaching up to tuck your fallen strands behind your ears. you weren’t expecting it; he barely flinched when he pulled you closer. you could see why everyone at school constantly stared, he wasn’t on the weaker side. it was growing more difficult to fight off the rush of emotion that came over you and swelling in your chest each time his eyes crinkled, intensely gazing into your own; his bad boy persona was diminishing little by little before your very eyes.

this arrangement made subtle touches toward each other a very normal thing. you found it difficult to keep your hands to yourself, especially in public. moments as you were walking down the street, your fingers would gravitate toward his.

“hi.” the crinkles around his eyes becoming deeper as he smiled. “someone wants attention.”

“aren’t you supposed to be going on a date soon?” you quipped, remembering that he wasn’t just yours to share.

he hummed, finger coming to his chin exaggeratedly as he stared off to the side in pretend thought. he did, but he knew where he’d rather be.

in response, your book was flung across the room, but not before he delicately folded at the corner of the page you were on. his fingers gripped onto your waist as he inhaled slowly, eyes wandering over your features like it was the first time he ever saw you.

“fancy a quick one?” that signature smirk was hard to say no to.

»»——————————-——————————————-««

A/N: part 2? ;)

#hwang in yeop #inyeop #hwang inyeop fluff #hwang inyeop suggestive #hwang inyeop angst #han seo jun #han seojun #true beauty #true beauty seojun #second lead syndrome #hwang inyeop #hwang inyeop au #hwang inyeop fic

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strwbrrypoundcake · 2 years ago

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Part two on the last post because I'm not done venting.

People don't understand the effect my childhood had on me. I was socially isolated, both my sister's AND my mother had rampant mental illnesses. I was a silent observer in all of that. I was bullied by kids and adults. Thrown around from doctor to doctor etc. I was almost always by myself, my mother rarely played with me. She has always treated me like a self sufficient robot with no social needs or need to go do things. I was a TV child, my only view of the outside was through fiction and media. My problems were solved with food, my rewards were food, everything revolved around food. My home was only feminine, I almost never interacted with men, causing my fear and avoidance of masculine presenting people. My sister was constantly getting in trouble, and sometimes bringing little me with her when she was doing something bad. I was around drugs and alcohol. Despite all of this I was severely sheltered. I found everything out through schoolmates or tv. My mom, the person who was supposed to teach me how to life, had almost no emotional regulation skills, I was punished for feeling emotion and was treated like my iq was 5. I grew up fast and had stalled mental growth at the same time. Even today I'm dealing with the aftermath. I was never taught how to do anything. Whatsoever. My only way of getting praise was through academics. Once I realized how good it felt for people to be proud of me, for people to see me, I began seeking it out everywhere. Including in my consumption of films. I saw actors play romance. The women in those scenes were desired, wanted and loved. So I searched for that. When I couldn't find it within the people I knew I searched for it online. And I fell prey to many pedophiles over the years. The first time, I was caught. I didn't even know what a pedophile was. I just knew I liked the feeling of talking to him. I was punished, scolded and humiliated by my parents. My mother will never ever entertain the idea that she could be a reason for why I struggle so much. No matter what my disorders are, my childhood was a part of it, and no mental health professional has ever touched it, never looked for the full story.

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aspoonofsugar · 4 years ago

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Hello, I would like to know what you think about the discussion that Cinder and Watts had.

It is interesting to note that what Watts tells Cinder is that her suffering doesn't make her strong or special or worthy of anything and by extension Watts tells Cinder that as much as she pretends that her suffering made her strong in reality she is still quite fragile and vulnerable because she hasn't been able to overcome her trauma and still wants to give meaning to her life and suffering.

Hello anons!

These two asks can be answered together.

First of all, I really liked that scene! It is probably my favourite moment of the episode together with the sequence in the underground.

I think there are two ways to see Watts and Cinder’s interaction in the episode.

1) Cinder

Cinder: You’re right. Without you I am nothing. But because of you, I am everything.

As I have written here:

Cinder’s way of thinking is very similar to Mercury’s. Not only have they both endured their parents’ violence, but they have tried to give this violence meaning. It is because of Madame that Cinder has become “everything” and it is because of Marcus that Mercury has become “strong”. They must believe that it was not all for nothing and that the pain they felt made them stronger instead of weaker.

This is why Cinder thinks that deep down her “hunger” is good. It is because it drives her, but she ignores that it blinds her too.

The idea that suffering made her stronger and more deserving than others is Cinder’s main coping mechanism.

She was treated as nothing, so she needs to believe she is secretly worthy of things others are negated. As I have stated here, she deep down wants to be chosen:

I would say that Cinder wants to be chosen. She wants to be special and to be given value. This is probably why she is serving Salem. It is because Salem has chosen her for an important role.

Well, Watts’s speech is about exactly this:

Watts: You think you’re entitled to everything because you’ve suffered, but suffering isn’t enough. You can’t just be strong, you have to be smart. You can’t just be deserving, you need to be worthy.

In a couple of phrases he deconstructs Cinder’s coping mechanism and this is why she is made to feel so vulnerable.

The whole point of Cinder is that she should stop reducing herself to her trauma and pain. By doing so, she both dehumanizes herself and dismisses others.

She dehumanizes herself because she tries to overcome her inferiority complex by looking for power and she does not realize that this is turning her into a monster:

Raven: Aura can’t protect your arm, it’s Grimm. You turned yourself into a monster just for power.

She dismisses others because she is so focused on her own pain that she can’t notice others’.

In short, she must stop pretending everything revolves around her and should start working on herself and her own issues. This is thematically what Watts’s speech is about. It also ties to the teaching of the Fall Maiden about choice. Destiny is not something that is given to you, but something you work towards:

Pyrrha: When I think of destiny, I don’t think of a predetermined fate you can’t escape. But rather… some sort of final goal, something you work towards your entire life.

Cinder is looking for worth outside herself. She wants Salem to recognize her and magical powers to be strong. She misses that self-worth is something only Cinder can grant herself.

However, things are not as simple in-universe because Watts is not referring to this in his speech. What he wants is not for Cinder to overcome her issues and to realize serving Salem is wrong. What Watts wants is for her to become better at her job.

Not only that, but in Watts’s speech there is hidden also this message that @luimnigh and @harostar have discussed here. Their posts are already clear, so I won’t spend much time on it.

The main idea is that Watts is worthy, while Cinder is not and how it goes back to their different upbringings and social status. In short, Watts is an Atlesian elite, while Cinder is a no-one, who was bought as a slave. Cinder keeps feeling this difference and can’t really break free from this kind of mentality.

That said, I think this last point gains more nuance when one looks at what this speech means for Watts himself.

2) Watts

Watts’s allusion is Watson and WoG says that he is Watson if he had connected with Moriarty instead of Sherlock. Personally, I think that as for now another good way to describe his allusion is that he is Watson if he were jealous of Sherlock instead of loyal to him.

As for now, Watts’s defining trait is his jealousy of Pietro Polendina and of his creation:

Watts: She’ll open the vault and she’ll destroy herself...And our little Penny problem would be...

It is not by chance that he wants to blow her up, even if that would not really be necessary. The Little Penny Problem he is talking about is really his problem and not Salem’s, who could not care less about Penny once she has the relic.

Watts wants to destroy Penny because he wants to be better than Pietro. Still, he misses why Pietro is better than him:

Watts: She’s on a set-path now...At least she should be...As much as I hate to admit it there seems to be some part of her capable of resisting...

As we know, the part of Penny who is capable of resisting is her humanity. Penny is a masterpiece not because she is a war machine, but because she is a real girl. This is the core of Pietro’s genius and this is what Watts can’t grasp:

Watts: Our tin soldier's heart has cost him his mind. We need to keep their attention on Mantle for as long as possible.

Watts, just like Ironwood, believes that feelings make you weak and stupid. Of course, this is the anti-thematic statement which has already been proven wrong over and over. Even when it comes to the situation above, Watts is actually being baited by Ironwood and him falling for it results in his arrest. The moment Ironwood is more open about his feelings is also the moment he is acting more logically.

In short, Watts is a brilliant scientist, who bought in Atlas’s ideology that you must pursue success at all costs. You must be strong/clever because only in this way you can be successful. If you let feelings cloud your determination/mind, you are a failure.

However, it is precisely this ideology taken to its extreme that is Watts’s own downfall.

He can’t understand Pietro’s ideal and is overshadowed by him. What is more, the idea of not being the first in his field drives him to disgrace.

His backstory makes so that Inside team WTCH Watts represents Salem’s entitlement.

This makes him similar to Cinder, as well. He is different from her for upbringing and status. Still, they both have the same flaw. They believe they are entitled to things.

Cinder does so because she has suffered. She was no-one, so now she must be the most important person in the world.

Watts does so because he was born an elite and he should stay an elite forever.

Watts is there not only to tell, but to show (both Cinder and the viewers) that the path Cinder is on leads nowhere. Watts had probably everything Cinder ever wanted. He was successful and rich. He did not have to worry about food or poverty. Still, that was not enough for him. He wanted more and this led him to betray his own country and to join a nihilistic witch.

In other words, Cinder will never find what she is looking for in power or success. Watts had both, but he is empty just like her. He is hungry just like her.

This is well conveyed symbolically by Watts being one of the very few characters that never unlocked his semblance. It means he never truly unlocked his full potential. He never truly understood who he wanted to be. He tried to be who his society wanted him to be, but he was not satisfied and decided to destroy it instead.

So, when Watts talks about the need to be smart and the difference between being deserving and worthy, he is actually talking about himself, probably without even realizing it. He is projecting his feelings of failure on Cinder. He was deserving, but not worthy. Pietro was the worthy one.

Other than these two, there is also another level to this confrontation that has been underlined by @misstrashchan here.

It is about the parallel between Cinder and Ironwood when it comes to their reactions to Watts spelling them the truth about themselves:

Ironwood: I will sacrifice... whatever it takes... to stop her.

Watts: Oh, I hope you do, James. I hope you do.

The difference, as the post above explains very well, is that Cinder is able to listen to Watts, while Ironwood ignores his words altogether.

This ties to how Ironwood’s inability to recognize his mistakes and to change his mind (literally what his semblance Mettle is about) is why he is the main villain in an arc where we are having the first redemption arc of one of our original trio of villains:

A redemption, which will probably be followed by other defections among the AceOps themselves.

In order to redeem one-self, a person must accept they were wrong and change their mind. Ironwood is unable to do so and this is why he is dangerous.

In conclusion, I love this confrontation because it is very complex, has many levels and is gray. In terms of complexity it reminds me of Tyrian’s interactions with Emerald and especially Mercury:

Tyrian is seen tormenting the two kids whenever he gets the chance. That said, he ironically ends up spelling out for them truths the two must face:

Tyrian: Do what makes you happy children… please? I’m begging you…

Tyrian: Of course she is! You’re surprised? Salem is destruction incarnate! Our mistress wishes to see the end of it all! There is no ideal more beautiful.

Tyrian is a great evil mentor because he manages to spell out what Emerald and Mercury should do and to make sure through his body language that they are not able to. He tells them the truth and threathens them, so that they can’t pursue what they need.

Here, Watts tells Cinder the truth by lashing out about how she is so worthless, that a machine must do her job.

It is also interesting because both Emerald and Mercury are clearly set-up to have an evil mentor figure:

Emerald and Hazel’s foiling has already paid off, while Mercury and Tyrian’s will probably pay off in the future.

I am not sure if Cinder will have a similar foiling/relationship with Watts. Still, it is an interesting possibility. Especially because one thing I would really like to happen with the original villain trio is for the abuse and the manipulation they are subjected to backfire. I would like for them to break free (with others’ help obviously because they can’t free themselves alone) by taking all these thematic truths they are told, so they can be manipulated, and to change them in teachings they can use against their abusers.

In short, I want Cinder to say...”Yeah, I do not need to be deserving of power because I am already worthy on my own”. And I want Mercury to free himself and to tell Tyrian...”This is what makes me happy”.

I think that this has partly happened with Emerald in the sense that Salem’s tactic to weaken her loyalty to Cinder through fear backfired:

Salem: Emerald... I want you to tell me whose fault this was. Now

Emerald: Cinder! We failed because of Cinder...

Salem: That's right. I want you to understand that failure. I want you to understand why Cinder must be left to toil in her isolation until she redeems herself.

The whole point of this interaction was to make Emerald submissive. It is clear Emerald is there for Cinder and not for Salem, so Salem frightened her and forced her to symbolically “betray” Cinder.

Still, this did not work for two reasons.

a) Emerald needs to see Cinder for who she is, so that she can break free from her.

b) Fear is among the factors that motivated Emerald to leave:

Yang: You're gonna have to try and summarize it. Why should we trust you?

Ren: Because she's scared. Just like us.

Not only that, but in an inversion of what usually happens with fear in the series, it is specifically because Emerald and JOYR are all scared that they can overcome their conflict and work together (as @echo-from-the-void. noticed). Fear has separated our protagonists from the AceOps, but has brought them Emerald.

These are my main thoughts on the scene, thank you for the asks!

#rwby #rwby meta #cinder fall #arthur watts #emerald sustrai #rwby volume 8 #rwby spoilers #asksfullofsugar #anonymous

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animaniachan · 4 years ago

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ᴛʀᴀɴꜱʟᴀᴛᴇᴅ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀ ᴘʀᴏꜰɪʟᴇꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ꜰʏᴀ’ᴍ’, ᴏɴᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀ ᴄᴀᴘᴘᴇʟʟᴀ ɢʀᴏᴜᴘꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ᴀᴏᴘᴘᴇʟʟᴀ!

ʀɪʀᴜʜᴀᴘɪ ᴘᴏꜱᴛ ʜᴇʀᴇ

ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ʀᴇᴘᴏꜱᴛ ᴍʏ ᴛʀᴀɴꜱʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴꜱ! ᴛʜᴀᴛ ɪꜱ ᴀ ꜰᴏʀᴍ ᴏꜰ ᴘʟᴀɢɪᴀʀɪꜱᴍ! ᴛʜᴇꜱᴇ ᴛʀᴀɴꜱʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ᴛᴏᴏᴋ Qᴜɪᴛᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴇꜰꜰᴏʀᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ꜱᴏ ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ꜱᴛᴇᴀʟ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋ! ʙᴇʟɪᴇᴠᴇ ɪᴛ ᴏʀ ɴᴏᴛ, ɪ’ᴠᴇ ʜᴀᴅ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴅᴏ ᴛʜɪꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ ʙᴇꜰᴏʀᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀꜱ ɴᴏᴛ ᴀ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ꜰᴇᴇʟɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴀʏ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴇᴀꜱᴛ.

ʟᴀꜱᴛʟʏ, ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀʀᴇ ᴛʀᴀɴꜱʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ɴᴏᴛᴇꜱ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴜᴛ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴏꜱᴇ ᴡʜᴏ ᴀʀᴇ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴇꜱᴛᴇᴅ! ᴀʟꜱᴏ ɪɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇꜱ ꜱᴏᴍᴇ ᴀᴅᴅɪᴛɪᴏɴᴀʟ ɪɴꜰᴏʀᴍᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴏʏꜱ!

ᴇᴅɪᴛ: ʏ’ᴀʟʟ ɪᴅᴋ ᴡʜᴀᴛ’ꜱ ʜᴀᴘᴘᴇɴɪɴɢ ʙᴜᴛ ᴛᴜᴍʙʟʀ ɪꜱ ᴇᴀᴛɪɴɢ ᴜᴘ ᴛʜᴇ ɢᴇɴᴇʀᴀʟ ɴᴏᴛᴇꜱ ꜱᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ɪᴍᴍᴇᴅɪᴀᴛᴇʟʏ ᴀꜰᴛᴇʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴜᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ᴍᴀᴋɪɴɢ ᴠᴇʀʏ ᴡᴇɪʀᴅ ᴇᴅɪᴛꜱ. ꜱᴏ ɪꜰ ʏᴏᴜ ꜱᴇᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ, ᴊᴜꜱᴛ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ’ꜱ ɴᴏᴛʜɪɴɢ ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ᴅᴏ. ɪ’ᴠᴇ ʙᴇᴇɴ ᴛʀʏɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ꜰɪx ᴛʜɪꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ʟɪᴋᴇ 30 ᴍɪɴꜱ ɴᴏᴡ ᴛᴛ

fya’m’ ’s name is derived from the first letter of each member’s first names. but because there was a dupe in the a and the m, they added the ’ behind the respective letters to indicate the duplication

check riruhapi’s post about the note on the schools

the two emblems/logos seen on the top right of fya’m’ ’s image is of their school emblem and group logo respectively. the top one being their school emblem while the bottom is their group logo

Coresawa Maito:

don’t ask me what a work-leader is because i don’t have a clue lol (the original japanese phrase used is actually “part-time job leader)

he is in class 2-1

his favourite food is dagashi (cheap japanese candies and snacks)

his hobby is making money (mood)

what he likes about a cappella: ...isn’t it just fun to do something like this with people? it gives you the vibe of being normal teenagers

others introduce him as the following:

the work-leader at his part-time job in a family restaurant

he wants to get the drivers license for his motorcycle

a word to his group members: “aoppella... if we’re doing this then we’re doing this to win.”

Ayase Mitsuo:

“little devil” is a japanese term used to describe a specific personality. the little devil personality is essentially someone who likes to tease others and toy with people’s hearts by seemingly giving them what they want but in reality, have no intention in doing so. they often like to act all cute to let people’s guard down in thinking that they’re of no harm.

“wicked-hearted” is translated from the japanese term 腹黒 (haraguro) which literally means “black belly.” basically, it’s someone who always likes to tease others and usually has an ulterior motive (usually to tease) when asking people to do something for them. haraguro can sometimes play hand-in-hand with sadism (not always) because the things haraguro people like to ask others to do are usually things against their wishes or things they don’t want to do (which in terms can make them suffer).

he is in class 1-3

his favourite food is skewered chicken (team salt without doubt) <- referring to the add-ons, usually it’s between sauce and salt

his hobby is photography (his dad is a photographer apparently)

what he likes about a cappella: it’s the best chance to appeal my cuteness to the world

others introduce him as the following:

a complete narcissist to the bone who has the world revolving around him

the other member who is responsible for arranging their songs

his emotions are more reliable than anybody else (i’m kind of confused myself on this line so don’t quote me)

a word to his group members: “do your best but only to the point where you won’t stand out more than me please~”

Shigaki Akira:

he is in class 1-4

his favourite food is anything that is recently popular between girls

his hobby is reading (especially romance novels targeted towards female readers)

what he like about a cappella: whenever i sing, all of the girls become super happy for me. but recently, i’m beginning to find joy in singing itself.

others introduce him as the following:

he disrupts the school discipline

super strong at social media (meaning he has a lot of followers)

he has way too many posts on social media that include girls

a word to his group members: “recently, singing with everybody has become so much fun. it may not be such a bad idea to seriously aim for aoppella, just kidding.” (he’s totally not kidding)

Soenji Asaharu:

asaharu’s name means “sunny morning” in japanese where sayo’s name means “rainy night.”

there’s a video posted on aoppella’s official yt channel that involves asaharu explaining the basics of a cappella and breaking down all of the parts.

he’s in class 2-2

his favourite food is traditional japanese meals (especially family dishes)

his hobby is walking his dog (a borzoi) and visiting dog parks on days off

what he likes about a cappella: he’s able to explore the deep topic of “using only voiced to charm people’s hearts” and thinks of a cappella as a deep and complicated subject

others introduce him as the following:

the student council president

the main music arranger for the group

can be very scary occasionally

a word to his group members: “they say that if you slack off even for a single day while doing arts that it will take 3 days to gain back the progress you have made. so, let us not slack off at our basic trainings.”

Nekoyashiki Yui:

yui’s surname, nekoyashiki (猫屋敷) literally means “a house for cats”

the student disciplinary committee is actually quite a common student body in japanese schools. the title sounds scary because i legit couldn’t find any other translation for it but basically what they do is make sure students follow the school rules and code.

he is in class 2-2

his favourite food is onigiri (especially the ones his grandma make)

his hobby is paper craft and watching history dramas (from tv to stage shows, he is a total history nerd) (also i’m pretty sure history drama in this context refers to the samurai and sengoku era shows based on yui’s personality)

what he likes about a cappella: a way to improve one self and to sharpen his skills alongside his friends to create high quality performances

others introduce him as the following:

a grandpa and grandma’s boy

super straight-laced samurai

has a surprisingly cute hobby

a word to his group members: “i don’t work well with half-assed people so give nothing but your best from now on too.”

Shinkai Fukami:

the name “fukami” can be interpreted as “a deep person” (referring to personality) or even translated to “a deep sea.” this is interesting because fukami’s surname, “shinkai” (深海) literally means “a deep sea” in kanji.

total side note but when translations fukami’s profile, i totally got hisoka vibes from him, please tell me i’m not the only one.

he is in class 2-3

his favourite food is chicken

his hobbies are muscle training, jogging, and collecting panda goods

what he likes about a cappella: the atmosphere when singing

others introduce him as the following:

mystery boy

a hidden high-spec (means that he’s secretly very capable and skilled)

the amount of panda stuff he has increased recently

a word to his group members: “thank you for singing with me.”

#aoppella #seiyuu #yona translates #not a3!#who is your fya’m’ oshi so far?#mine is asaharu and fukami #love the vibes they give off #coresawa maito #ayase mitsuo #shigaki akira #soenji asaharu #nekoyashiki yui #shinkai fukami

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rigmarolling · 5 years ago

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Top 5 Things That Will Kill You In the Victorian Era

If you’ve ever spent more than two seconds with me, you know that I live and breathe the fog-choked air of Victorian London. All day. Every day of my life.

See, in many ways, the Victorians were the first version of us--overwhelmed by rapidly-changing technology (and its awful effect on the climate); dealing with incredible wealth gaps; grappling with rising crime and faster travel and out-of-control media and the whole, “God is dead, oh no” thing.

Also, everything was trying to kill you.

Like, literally almost everything.

From your clothes to your doctor to your canned food, here are the top five things that will kill you in the Victorian era.

5. Other Victorians

If the rise of penny dreadfuls (cheap magazines stuffed with horror stories for us morbidly-inclined goth types) was any indication, Victorians loved them some true crime.

And there was no shortage of subject matter to choose from: depending on where you ventured in London, at least, you could be subject to anything from pickpocketing to mugging to violent assault and, of course, murder.

There were a few reasons for this:

For one thing, the population in London alone increased by millions in the 19th century, and approximately no one was prepared for that. So, to accommodate the rapidly-booming population, the wealthy folks in charge reached out and lovingly ensured the masses of the disenfranchised poor were taken care of by redistributing resources and education and access to opportunities that improved lives on a both a personal and social level.

Lol, no, I’m totally kidding; they shoved them into slums and tenement buildings and pretended they didn’t exist.

So of course, there was a rise in crime, because if you have five kids and you can’t find gainful employment and your family will starve if you don’t steal that basket of food over there, or that purse that lady left sitting over THERE, what are you going to do? You’re going to steal the food and the purse to survive, Jean Valjean, I understand, I do.

Except the powers that be did NOT understand, and instead routinely espoused the idea that if people were poor, it was because they were morally bankrupt, or inherently bad, somehow, and the “criminal classes,” as they came to be known by the growing Victorian middle and upper-middle classes, were simply considered genetically bad to the bone and therefore undeserving of assistance.

Basically:

So ANYWAY.

Crime was on the rise and there were multiple efforts to stop it with varying degrees of success, but big city usually = big crime, especially when there’s a massive gap between the one percent-ers and THE REST OF US, WASHINGTON.

Ahem.

All that crime? The booming news industry loved it. The press ate it up and then spit it back out in salacious headlines that never even bothered with journalistic objectivity, like this gem:

I mean. Full disclosure: I, too, agree that cutting off a woman’s head, arms, and legs and then burning them is “awful, inhuman, & barbarous” but just...maybe...maybe tone it down? Just a bit?

No? Okay.

See, here’s the thing: crime sells. It always has. And papers went nuts with full illustrated spreads about the latest brutal murders so you could sit in your parlor and get anxiety poops thinking about how the butcher down the street looked at you funny the other day and oh, God, you’re probably next, oh God.

The most famous murderer of the era, was, of course, Jack the Ripper, which was just the orchestral climax of a hideously corrupted society that had bubbled into naught but a festering carbuncle, an ulcer upon the very soul of man, trussed up as a city of industry, but which is merely Salome, dancing with the Lamb’s head upon a platter and sending us all tumbling into a fiery pit.

....Ahem, again.

Some popular ways your fellow Victorians could kill you included: dueling (with swords but usually with revolvers), stabbing, garroting, and, probably the most popular method of the era, poisoning.

Speaking of which...

4. Anything dyed that hip shade of green

In 1775, a guy named Carl Wilhelm Scheele invented a new shade of green, cleverly called Scheele’s green, and it instantly became a hit. Pretty soon, manufacturers and tailors were dyeing everything this color.

Look at it. Bright, airy. Calls to mind a fresh, spring meadow. (What’s that, you ask? Well, before the Industrial Revolution belched out black smoke onto absolutely everything, there were these things called plants and grass and they were all over the place and you could frolic through them and it was very nice for your serotonin levels.)

I mean, listen, this isn’t really my color because anything vaguely yellow-ish makes my already yellow-ish skin look especially jaundiced, but it’s a lovely shade:

Besides using it to create beautiful dresses and tasteful waistcoats, they used it inside book covers:

And it was a super popular wallpaper color:

They had green candles and green cups and green kitchenwares and green paint.

But while Carl Wilhelm Scheele didn’t exactly murder anyone (even though he has three names like every serial killer ever), he sort of, accidentally, indirectly, kinda...did.

Because that springy dye contained every Victorian black widow’s favorite method to dispose of a troublesome husband: arsenic.

Scheele, of course, had no idea--no one did--so I’m fully exonerating him here, but the poison nonetheless started to take its toll.

Reports began to surface of kids getting sicker and sicker and then dying in their green wallpapered rooms; of fashionable ladies rocking those green dresses at balls and then ALSO getting sicker and sicker and breaking out in horrible sores before dying.

They even used this stuff to dye food green, so of course, anybody who tucked into Victorian green eggs and ham also, you know. Died.

And if they DIDN’T die, they got cancer, because if arsenic doesn’t kill you, it will give you cancer. And then kill you.

Eventually, as science advanced and went, “HEYO, there’s literal poison in this stuff,” consumers were like, “Well, shoot, this summer’s hottest beach shade just killed an entire boarding school,” and Scheele’s green finally fell out of favor.

It was, however, used as a pesticide up through the 1930s, so...way to use the...leftovers? I guess?

3. Your canned food

Hey, now that we’re on the topic of deadly chemicals being where they absolutely should not be, let’s talk about canned food.

In the Victorian era, it was the new Hot Thing (next to arsenic green). You mean I can can my food now? Like? Forever? Oh, only for a few months. Okay, cool. Still cool.

Above: Road trip snax.

Food preservation methods had existed long before canned meats and veggies and soups, but canned everything really started to gain traction around the middle of the 19th century, and people were stoked. Remember, the population exploded; people needed new methods of obtaining cheap food that didn’t spoil immediately. So: cans to the rescue!

Recycling hadn’t really been invented, though, so today, archaeologists constantly find giant Victorian trash pits filled with empty cans.

You know what also hadn’t been invented? Consumer health and safety boards.

So guess what was in the tin cans themselves?

No, no, don’t worry, it wasn’t arsenic.

It was lead.

Which, in case you weren’t aware, is also very, very bad for you.

So bad, in fact, that today, scientists are pretty sure lead-lined tins of canned food were partially responsible for the deaths on the disastrous Franklin Expedition, an ultimately futile trip to discover the Northwest Passage lead by Sir John Franklin in 1845. Every single man on board the two ships stranded in the Arctic died, and in the 1980s, when scientists discovered perfectly mummified bodies (GRAPHIC, if you don’t like that sort of thing, but awesome if you do) of some of the sailors, one of the mummies contained insane amounts of lead. They later tested the cans found scattered across the wreck site and whoops, they also contained insane amounts of lead.

Above: Some of the tin cans from the Franklin Expedition, which contained items like salted beef, vegetables, tea, lethal amounts of lead, and Chicken of the Sea.

Granted, other factors contributed to the Franklin deaths, like, you know, being stranded in the Arctic and starving to death, and also tuberculosis, but lead-lined canned food certainly didn’t help things along.

2. Your doctor

Here’s my advice if you’re in the Victorian era and you’re starting to feel sick: do not get sick. Just don’t. Because then that means you’ll have to go to the doctor. Which probably means you will die.

Hospitals in the 19th century were deadly. Often even more deadly than just staying at home, according to Dr. Lindsey Fitzharris, author of The Butchering Art. Nobody knew how to treat anything, really, because medical understanding of biology was in its infancy and antibiotics didn’t exist yet, so you were absolutely, definitely going to get some kind of infection the second you stepped foot in a Victorian hospital.

Above: The surgery, where nobody has any idea what they are doing, ever.

Doctors weren’t trying to kill you on purpose--they just didn’t know any better. And it super duper didn’t help that common treatments for everything from the common cold to tuberculosis included taking mercury (which kills you) and blood-letting, (which can also kill you) the tools for which are shown below:

Those might look like fun doodads for your astronomy class at Hogwarts, but they’re actually vials and a really, really sharp needle that pricks you until you bleed out a critically dangerous amount of blood into those vials.

The (ancient) school of thought behind blood-letting was that draining patients of “bad” blood would rebalance their “humours” and get rid of the icky thing that was making them sick. We might laugh at it now, but if you don’t know any better, logically, it makes sense.

Medically, oh my God, it’s the worst.

So if Doc didn’t bleed you to death, he might try surgery--done without anesthesia or antibiotics (until good old Dr. Lister came along--read The Butchering Art!), and then ship you and your amputated stump leg off to the hospital ward where, instead of healing, you’d get wheeled through hallways stained with every bodily fluid imaginable into rooms filled with people coughing up every bodily fluid imaginable, some of which would get into your leg stump, infect it, and then kill you dead.

“But what about medicine?” you ask. “Can’t I just take medicine?”

Sure! Just be aware that it definitely contains morphine and probably contains cocaine, or mercury, or arsenic, or sulfur, or pulverized bits of ancient Egyptian mummies (I am not kidding. True, the latter had started to fall out of favor in the 19th century, but, like. Stop).

Above: Hard drugs, but just for you.

You think I’m joking?

Above: PARTY TIME.

Sometimes, a doctor would just advise that you move to a “more temperate climate” like Rome or Spain if you were feeling chronically ill, which might help you get a tan and COULD help if you had sucky lungs, but eventually, you’d just die anyway, because what you really needed was a strong antibiotic or antiviral medication and the closest you were gonna get was Mrs. Hopplebopple’s Temperance Tonic, which was probably filled with ground up baby bones and just so much heroin.

And don’t even get me started on Victorian surgical tools:

Open wide.

1. Water

There are three rules in this life: don’t watch any Adam Sandler movies except for maybe Anger Management, don’t eat the yellow snow, and do not, ever, for any reason, ever drink water in Victorian England.

That’s because it was about as clean as a Victorian hospital.

Meaning it wasn’t. At all.

Victorian water--of the Thames variety--contained:

Cholera, one of the deadliest killers of the era and bad water’s favorite roommate.

Poop, human and otherwise, because a functioning sewer system? I don’t know her. (At least, not until the 1860s.)

Pee, human and otherwise, because nothing says, “Jolly Old England” like an open trench of piss rolling through the city.

Dead things, like animals, fish (which are animals, so why am I listing them as a separate thing?), and, occasionally, humans.

Chemicals, which spewed forth from the great factories in billowing, bubbling, belching rivers of sludge. (Ha! Omg, yes, I was an English major!)

The Thames was so filthy that Londoners called it “Monster Soup.”

Above: Same.

In 1855, scientist Michael Faraday (who was also kind of hot; tell me I’m wrong), wrote a letter to the Times about the disgusting state of the river:

"Near the bridges the feculence rolled up in clouds so dense that they were visible at the surface, even in water of this kind. ... The smell was very bad, and common to the whole of the water; it was the same as that which now comes up from the gully-holes in the streets; the whole river was for the time a real sewer."

Tl;dr: “It smelled like ass.”

In fact, it got so bad, so putrid, so horrifically clogged with every disgusting thing your mind and your butthole can possibly conjure up, that it lead to one of my favorite things to read about in the world: The Great Stink of 1858.

Yes, that’s the real name. I did not make that up. History is incredible.

Above: Summer vacation, 1858.

The summer of 1858 was miserably hot in London. And the Thames was miserably clogged with poop, and pee, and chemicals, and dead things, and, uh oh, cholera. During July and August that year, the smell wafting from the river was so offensive that Parliament was actually adjourned because everybody kept throwing up. Cholera devastated the city. The water was killing London.

Faced with either the prospect of living with a city-wide vomit-and-diarrhea smell for the rest of forever OR finally cleaning things up, the government actually did something right and chose the latter. They contracted civil engineer Joseph Bazalgette to overhaul the city’s sewer, to which Bazalgette, pinching his nose, responded, “FINALLY.”

Above: Joesph Bazalgette, savior of the London sewers and purveyor of a truly beautiful mustache.

Bazalgette proceeded to build the London sewer system still in use today. His efforts greatly reduced the number of cholera deaths, cleared the Thames of its Cronenberg-esque muck, and ensured that poop goes where it’s supposed to: way the hell out of HERE and way the hell under THERE.

Water sanitation still had a long way to go, though, which meant you either had to boil your water to kill the bacteria in it, or you could just drink alcohol instead, which was the safer option but which would also leave you very dehydrated and also, if imbibed excessively, would leave you very dead.

So really, you were doomed in some way no matter what you did, and if that isn’t the moral of the entire Victorian story, then I don’t know what is.

#victorian #listory

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youngnari · 4 years ago

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Thicker Than Water // Ten

—Notes : t had been a long while since I started writing anything (pardon if this sucks), and I have a lot of things in my drafts right now that I have to continue. Uni had been overwhelming and recently my internship ended, hopefully I can write more before my next term starts. Overall, enjoy this short scenario I made and have a nice day ahead :)

—Wc : 7831 words

—Warning : honestly, none... I just wanted to write about Ten cause I love Ten, well we all love Ten.

—Pairing : childhood best-friend!Ten x female!reader

—Genre : a cup of fluff + a few dashes of angst

—Summary : Two childhood best-friends found it hard to confront their feelings for one another, until they grew apart;

When distance grew and time spent apart, love became stronger. After all, it is thicker than water.

“I love you, Ten”

Love is thicker than water. Your feelings wouldn’t easily be dissolved even after a few years of not seeing him.

And that’s when you knew, love is true.

Life decisions often come knocking on your door when you least expect them to. They are often buried in the form of steps, growth, and changes.

The life decisions you chose rarely caused any big changes in your life, although you were partially to blame for often wanting to play it too safe. Your life always revolved around the same people, all located in a similar environment. Your so-called childhood best-friend who lived just around the corner of your block, a brief five-minute walk. He played a big role in your life, similarly to your parents. You had known him since you were three, possibly longer; from bathing and swimming together naked in his kiddy pool his parents had set up in his backyard during summer time when you guys were four, to him freaking out when he noticed blood stains on your pajamas pants that you discarded into the laundry basket when you first hit puberty thinking you were dying due to some chronic disease, to the so-called first love and first heartbreak you ever received when you were in high school. The same person was always by your side.

Yes, you had chosen to fall in love with your childhood best-friend. And that was the first time you realized: sometimes the safest choice, isn’t so safe after all.

Cue – Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul, more commonly known as Ten.

You have seen Ten when he was doing his best, while Ten has seen you when you are doing your absolute worst. He often got straight A’s, a few A-‘s for Chemistry and Physics, and he was chosen as the lead dancer of the school’s dance team – mastering traditional and modern styles so goddamn well, yet you still thought he was the dumbest kid alive. Ten may be seen by many as the epitome of how every Asian kid should be, molded by their parent since young to be nothing but perfect. Ten was often envied by other parents, they hid it well in the form of praises thrown towards his parents, but they shrugged it off saying Ten always tried to do his best.

They weren’t wrong. You had seen Ten studying until late at night for mid-terms and finals, often resulting in the consumption of an unhealthy amount of energy drinks and coffee as he reached a certain limit. He usually started his homework and projects early to enable freedom in the last few days before the due date, giving him the leisure to not cram things up the night before, but late-night video games. He was simply organized, well prepared, and perfect.

You had known Ten for your entire life, and it didn’t seem like the end of high school would be the end of your friendship. Until one night when he came barging into your room straight from the graduation party his friend Kun had thrown, celebrating freedom as they broke the chain of education by graduating from high school.

You still remembered how your heart skipped a beat when he came in, his lean figure stood elegantly in your door frame. Ten looked at your figure buried under your blanket, your nightstand occupied with snacks and water, laptop on your lap, the screen the main source of light in the dimly lit room. He caught the sound of the actors speaking from your laptop, heavy Spanish and gunshots ringing heavily from the speakers. He smiled knowing you probably rejected Kun’s invitation to settle down at home and binge watch Netflix instead, once again hiding yourself from socializing with people.

He let himself in as his hand closed the door slowly, striding over across the room in large step, he took his seat beside you before snuggling into the blankets to watch the show with you. You swore you felt hot, trying your best to fight the blush creeping across your cheeks. It seemed okay at first, knowing the room was quite dark and the only source of light was from the changing scenes of La Casa de Papel that was playing in your laptop. You thought he might hear your loud heartbeat, yet the sound of gunshots and screaming thankfully covered the sound of the erotic thumps of your heart.

He let out a sigh.

You could smell his musky cologne mixed with a little of his sweat, the stench of alcohol from his breath, the smell of cigarettes from his clothes filling your room. You hummed a little, catching his attention in the process.

“Can you believe we graduated?” He began to speak, giving you a question that similarly went along the line of what now.

You smiled a little and nodded.

“It’s only high school, Ten. We still have a long way to go.” You said.

“No, you still have a long way to go.” He said, his eyes glinting, proud of your achievements in life.

Ten remembered the talk both of you had, the plans you hoped to complete once both of you graduated from high school. You had told him you wanted to pursue studying in engineering or food science, while him – Ten wanted to be an artist, a singer or performer on stage.

He noticed your eyes dim a little and he sighed. His arms circled around your shoulders, bringing your figure closer towards him. You felt his warmth almost immediately, suddenly craving for more and you found yourself scooching towards him. Ten didn’t mind; you had curled up next to each other every movie night since you were young. He felt your head leaning towards him, smelling the hint of vanilla and mint from the shampoo and conditioner you always used. He smiled.

“Are you still not going to tell me who’s the guy you fell for?” He asked you again.

Ten felt your body tense up for a while before slowly loosening up again. You swallowed a lump in your throat as your eyes shook despite trying your best to focus on your laptop screen.

You had told Ten regarding your discovery of love after he kept pestering you to start finding a match, to the point he asked his handful of friends to introduce new people for you and set you up on a blind date. You had yelled at him in frustration, revealing that the reason you didn’t want to find a guy to date was due to you having feelings for someone already. Never once did you explicitly tell him who the person was, in fear that an outcome you didn’t want may occur.

Ten believed in you and respected your privacy, opting to stay silent most of the time. That didn’t keep him from pestering you with questions about the so-called crush, although he didn’t expect you to answer.

“You’re still on about it?” You snapped back. He gave you that annoying grin of his and nodded.

“Are you still in love with that crush of yours then?” He persisted. This time, you smiled knowing he wasn’t going to back down.

“I am, since forever probably.” You answered.

One of the fears you had since you were young was the fear of being rejected; you were sure everyone had a similar fear like yours, deep down inside of them. You weren’t necessarily scared of the rejection; you were more scared of the aftermath from the rejection. You knew Ten liked you, but you weren’t so sure if he wanted you like you wanted him. your refusal to confess stemmed from one of two possible outcomes if you did; one – he accepts you and you start dating, which meant the best of both worlds. Two – you are rejected, resulting both of you drifting apart and becoming strangers despite having a friendship almost reaching two decades.

Ten, your best-friend who recently broke up with his ex-lover. Confessing to him this early would only be a suicidal move. His past lover, whom he broke up a few weeks before graduation. The reasoning behind it was quite simple, none of his lovers liked seeing him with you.

The way he looked at you dotingly, laughed at every dumb joke you gave, the way he tucked loose strands of hair behind your ear, and dropping everything that he was doing to be around you. You were confident to say that you were his number one, and you withstood the pain that came with every one of his relationships.

Because you knew that Ten would always come back to you, back into your arms.

But you are still scared of confessing to him, unaware of what exactly is going on in his mind. You didn’t want to lose Ten just like that, you fear of not having him in your life when you were already so used to seeing him around you, being with him 24/7.

Other than that, you were confused with Ten. He was unpredictable at times: most of the time. You didn’t know if he was giving you hints regarding his approach towards you. Because many told you that he treated you differently from how he treated others, you could see that.

Ten wasn’t so touchy around people he considered friends or close friends, but when it came to you, things from linking arms around one another, hugging in public, cuddling during movie nights, and him giving you a peck on the cheek at random moments. All obvious signs he favored you more compared to others. You carried it like a medal, knowing probably no one could ever replace your spot next to Ten.

But the other thing that bothered you so dearly was that he was your first kiss. Yes, Ten was your first kiss.

Enter: prom night, 3 days after graduation.

Ten ‘proposed’ to you a month before prom, getting you a bouquet of a single sunflower and peperoni pizza with extra cheese from your favorite pizzeria downtown during one of your Netflix marathons. You were surprised by his grand entrance, nevertheless you ignored it due to his unexpected behavior at times. You accepted the flower thinking it was nothing but a gift for your mother and eagerly took the warm pizza from his hands before going into your room. Just as you opened the pizza box, excited to reveal the greasy cheesy goodness from heaven above – you were left in shock, with your eyebrows shooting upwards, eyes widened, and mouth forming an big ‘O’ as you read the note plastered on the lid.

P R O M?

Others may think it was stupid or too cheesy to be considered a good plan; to you it was stupidly cheesy and you loved it. Even though the note was speckled with grease, you kept it to this day. You turned around to give your response, only to be faced with ten kneeling on one knee holding a sunflower corsage sitting comfortably in a clear plastic box surrounded by white baby’s breath, all tied with a black bow on top, his signature wrapping.

You stood there frozen, not knowing how to react to his sudden act. He grinned madly and laughed at your reaction, snapping you out from your trace.

“Is that a yes?” He asked, hopeful.

You laughed and nodded at him, knowing you would rather go to prom alone if it wasn’t with Ten.

“Great, I was scared you had a date with your crush.” Ten joked.

You thought about your answer for a while. You didn’t necessarily have anyone in mind to ask out as your prom date, as the only person who always came to mind was none other than Ten himself. You rejected a few people who came and asked you out, stating you had someone in mind as you looked at them sadly.

Ten on the other hand was the same, he didn’t have anyone in mind but you. Thinking to himself it was better to spend prom with someone who truly meant something to him rather than a random person he didn’t even know.

Hence, the proposal for prom.

“I think my crush has a date already, so it’s fine.” You shrugged off coolly. Ten smiled at you and nodded, relieved by the answer before he furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

“Aren’t you sad that another person is their partner for prom?” He asked again, this time curious.

“A little, but I feel like I don’t stand a chance with him.” You said, smiling sheepishly at the end.

“Then, we’ll show him what he’s missing out on then.” Ten stated proudly as he sent a wink towards you.

You smiled softly at him and nodded. He’s not going to miss out on much, you thought, losing your train of thought as Ten buried himself under your blanket, urging you to hurry up.

Prom rolled out faster than you expected it to. One morning you woke up in your old t-shirt and oversized loose cotton pants, lazing out in your bed till late afternoon. The next, you were up, showered and off to do your hair, pick up your prom dress, and pamper yourself for the whole day.

The once loose old t-shirt and oversized long cotton pants changed to an elegant long black dress which hugged your curves and showed off your figure. Your once messy hair was styled and smelled amazing, a simple long gold necklace draped across your collar bones, and the most dreaded part: the heels.

At 8PM sharp you heard the doorbell ring, signaling Ten’s arrival.

He came in looking like a prince. Ten was dressed in a black dress shirt, paired with formal pants that enhanced his long legs, his neck constricted with a black tie, it seemed like he was glowing under the dark fabric. You held your breath, noticing him grow more charming the more you laid your eyes at him.

Ten smiled when he saw your figure from the top of the stairs, reaching out a hand for you to take. Slowly you went down like the girls you often see in the cliché romcom series, taking his hand that was fully extended towards you.

Instantly you felt the rush of electricity, the warm skin embracing your cold hands. It felt right.

“You look amazing.” He said, smiling giddily like a child.

“And so do you.” You said back.

He slowly took out the corsage, slipping it on your wrist. You stared in awe at the contrast of the bright yellow flora wrapped around your wrist with a black ribbon between the black clothing you wore. You did the same for him, taking his part of the corsage and pinning it on the pocket near his chest, giving a bigger contrast against his pale skin and his black formal.

It seemed surreal but that night, you thought both of you were meant to be.

“Ready?” he asked.

You smiled, linking your arm with his as you hug his figure close to yours, wanting nothing but to savor the moment between the both of you.

That night, it was the first time you felt fairytales could be translated into real life.

It took you approximately two hours for your feet to completely die on you. You sat down on the row of empty chairs beside the long table filled with glorious food, a red cup of artificially flavored punch in your hand. You played around with it, occasionally your head bopped around to the music being played.

When the lights suddenly dimmed, you raised your head upwards to meet Ten’s. His forehead gleamed with sweat, hair disheveled, yet he ginned wider like nothing mattered.

“One last dance?” He asked, his hand extending for an invite, encouraging you to take it.

You knew your feet were dead, pierced under the heels. Yet you still smiled like it was nothing, nodding and taking his hand. He pulled you further into the crowd, taking your figure into his embrace. He turned around when he found a space, instinctively his hands circled around your waist. You could feel the warmth that radiated from his hand, the blast of the AC was nothing compared to his touch. You returned his grin with a smile, your hand circling around his neck.

That was enough for Ten to know you were comfortable, pulling you closer to him, closing the gap in between. Your eyes fluttered shut, your heart beating rapidly, seemingly wanting to break free from your ribcages and attack Ten. You smiled to yourself, fairytales can be real.

“I’ll get you Shake Shack if you let me in that head of yours.” You snapped your eyes open, looking at Ten’s gleaming ones.

“My thoughts are worth more than Shake Shack.” You snapped at him, he laughed.

“You’re thinking about that crush of yours?” He asked, tone soft as he gazed at you sadly.

“No.” you said without much thought.

“No?”

“My crush isn’t here” You lied. Ten hummed, nodding at your answer.

“Are you sad that your crush isn’t here?” He asked again. You shook your head, giving him a smile.

Ten leaned closer towards you. Your heart drummed to the point you could barely hear the music booming on the speakers, or the crowd chattering to oblivion. You closed your eyes, anticipating what he might do after. He placed a delicate kiss on your forehead, sighing silently at the end. You never knew what the meaning behind that sigh was, whether it was good or bad.

When he pulled away, Ten seemed fine. There weren’t any hidden emotions being spilled, there was only a wide goofy grin plastered on his feature. You had your hope in him confessing, but it seemed unlikely knowing Ten probably saw you as nothing but a dear friend.

It didn’t take him too long to snap out of his own world, pulling you away from the crowd towards the cool midnight air.

“Where are we going?” You blurted out.

Ten turned his head to face you, feet still pacing towards his parked car. His eyes squinted at yours, eyebrows furrowed. You knew he was silently judging you, especially since Ten was never a master in concealing his expressions.

“Midnight drive.”

You remembered the silence of the road during that ungodly late hour. No traffic jams, smooth ride, it went well. The night was dark, the only given light from the moon. You often found yourself glancing at Ten, amazed by his features.

You felt the car halt during a red light, its man-made neon lights flashing across his face, sculpting his features. You gazed in admiration at the result, thinking that he could be an exhibit displayed in an art museum.

“Stop staring or I’ll poke your eyes out.” He said. You turned away instantly, acted as if you weren’t ogling him.

Ten laughed at your behavior, he said nothing and proceeded to drive. He made a turn, and you found yourself in the drive-thru of McDonalds. It was still Prom and having McDonalds with a flashy tux and a bedazzled dress was a perfect way to end it.

Then Ten parked his car alongside the river, letting you eat whilst staring at the breathtaking view; you couldn’t ask for more. He rolled down the window and turned off the engine. You could feel the harsh rumble slowed down to nothing, allowing the soft rippling of the waves to replace it. Ten rummaged through the paper bag, taking out the food. He passed you your order and you quickly munched on one of the fries. Ten opened his mouth, making some random sounds to get your attention. You took one of the fries and put it in his gaping mouth. He hummed in satisfaction.

“I want the Mcflurry!” You demanded

Ten rolled his eyes at you but still he complied, giving you the dessert. You smiled at the melting dessert, taking a fry and dipping it inside the cup. You moaned at the taste; how you loved the contrasting taste of salty with the sweetness.

“Give me one!” Ten stated. You nodded, scooping some of the sweet flurry on the fry. Passing it to Ten, you could only hope it didn’t spill anywhere. You felt a little of it drip on your hand, yet you paid no attention towards it. Ten bit down and chewed.

You were about to pull your hand away and wipe the spilled ice cream, but Ten held you in place. Taking your hand in his, he latched his lips on your hand. You could feel him giving little kitten licks, cleaning the marked area. You felt yourself grow hot, blushing at the sudden intimacy from him. When Ten raised his head, he noticed the color of your face turning a few shades of pink and smiled to himself.

“Are you flustered?” He asked

You wanted to slap him. Before you could do much, you felt his grip on your wrist tighten. Ten pulled you closer towards him, the impact enough to send you toppling towards him. You yelped in surprised, Ten smiling at your confused state.

Both of your faces were inches from one another, just one nudge was enough to send your lips flying towards his. You felt your face grow hotter; his smirk prominent on his face. You knew Ten was doing nothing but tease, but a small part of you did hope he would lean forward. You saw the glint of mischief glimmer in his pupils, his hot breaths hitting your cheeks, but he was still as composed as ever.

“Did you expect anything?” He asked with a smirk on his face.

“Screw you, Ten.” You hissed out, stumbling on your words.

He let out a small chuckle, amused by your choice of comeback. Ten leaned forwards, finally closing the gap in between. You felt your heart leap when his lips touched yours, delicate at first before it became more needy. You sighed a little into the kiss, it was enough for Ten to continue. He pressed himself towards you, deepening the kiss. When he pulled away, he stared at you in awe. Your hazy eyes and your flustered face, accompanied by your whole body gasping for air, he thought you looked breathtaking.

He licked his lips, tasting the artificial cherry lip gloss you wore. He hummed in content, bliss even.

The next thing happened in a snap. The words that you always kept to yourself, never once slipping out. They were always deep inside, locked in a chest, key thrown into oblivion. In a snap, everything stumbled out without your control.

“I love you, Ten” And his eyes widen by your confession.

***

That happened 2 years ago.

You had always been safe in your life choices, in hope to ensure the safest outcome in the future. You tried your best to succeed in school, got into a decent college, and managed to find an average part time job as a librarian on your campus ground. You had thought if you choose your path wisely, it was easier for you to survive in life.

Ten proved you wrong.

You had always thought falling for Ten would eventually lead you to another stage in life, to finally settle down. You envisioned him not only as your life-long best friend, but also had the hope to be a potential lover.

You loved Ten, truly. But he made you realize that sometimes the safest decisions weren’t so safe after all.

After Prom, he drove you back home without a second thought. He walked you to the door, let you settle in the house before leaving. You had thoughts that Ten might leave you after the whole kiss situation, but he didn’t.

The next morning, he texted you again, to check up if you were feeling okay or up for another day out. You remembered declining, stating you were too tired from coming back so late – which was true. It was still fine, perfect.

You had always thought Ten would realize how head over heels you were for him. It seemed impossible for anyone to be that dense, moreover he was always there around you. You remembered smiling rigidly when you noticed his expression.

His eyes widened; mouth slightly agape like a fish on the surface. You felt his hands shake a little, you felt it on your skin. Ten stuttered out his words, stumbling here and there not being able to fully form a complete sentence.

You had never seen him like that.

Ten called you the next morning, and you still had your hopes for your feelings to be reciprocated. Instead, he only replied you with—

“I am sorry, for everything. It was the heat of the moment, I got carried away”

You didn’t know what hurt more. A rejection; it was cruel, and it hurt, but you knew Ten wouldn’t lie to you even if his life depended on it. Or the fact he disappeared straight after; Ten wasn’t there the next time you tried to contact him, no calls, no texts, nothing.

You knew Ten’s dreams; he spoke about them countless time during your high school days. He wanted to perform in front of thousands, to show his passion and love for his art. You supported him; you knew his potential.

You had seen him practicing, dancing and singing till late at night. Often mad at him for not taking care of himself, being that friend who helped him to pass all his subjects, to a mother who always brought him meds and food to ensure he was eating well.

You cared for Ten, too much sometimes.

The moment he told you he didn’t want to go to university, you didn’t know how to react. Ten brushed your expression off and stated that going to university together or not, he would still be the same Ten you know and grew up with.

He didn’t keep his promise.

You cried a few times, feeling lost for the sudden loss in your life. You heard from your parents that you would meet people like Ten once you entered university; you wanted to believe them. They meant no harm, not wanting to see you cry. But you knew you couldn’t possibly believe every word they said.

Ten was one of a kind, and you still loved him.

Each day dragged on longer than before. You had never felt the overwhelming emptiness, the lack of notifications from him. It felt empty.

You had never felt the loss and emptiness, until you felt him slip out of your life.

He left no traces. His room still the same, sheets still tucked neatly. But his scent was weak, it wasn’t him. It took you quite a while before you could finally accept his absence in your life, Ten had his own life now.

Yet, even after all of that—you were still in love with him.

It was another typical day for you. Finishing classes on campus you ran to the library to start your shift. You went to check your attendance on the board and proceeded to the main desk to settle down. You sighed a little, calming down your racing heart from the small sprint you did.

You took one of the books on the desk, looking at the books to be returned and due for the day. You hummed in acknowledgement before placing it back down. Taking your laptop and papers from earlier lectures, you started doing your own work. It was a few hours of silence in the library. People came and went, coming up to ask for books, information, or just to return and borrow books for the remaining days. It wasn’t a hassle, as in only took you a short while to complete each task, then you were back doing your work once again.

It was a few minutes to closing time. You started packing up your things, putting each chair back in its original position, checking the remaining books that had been returned for the day or for any remaining people who were still roaming around the area. You were about to switch off the power and call it a day until the door opened, calling for your attention. You lifted your head to confront the new incomer, slightly annoyed to see people still dared to come in despite it was already closing time.

“I’m sorry, the library is closed for the—” You halted. It was as if the words stopped forming, your voice stopped functioning.

The familiar figure who had been beside you your entire life. From when he was a literal infant, growing to a rowdy teenager, and now a grown man. He remained the same, only a few changes. His skin was still as pale as ever, a real-life interpretation of Snow White. His dark locks and orbs, the pair of eyes you would let yourself get drawn into. You noticed he was a little skinnier, his eyes a little sunken. But his smile, his smile was still as bright as ever.

“T-Ten” You stuttered his name. Feeling odd by the sudden familiar yet unfamiliar name that had to roll out of your tongue.

“I’m back, love” Your heart swooned.

***

You bit down on the fries, feeling the familiar taste of salt hitting your taste buds. You sighed in bliss, knowing this was all you need after ending your campus and work life.

You turned your head, looking at Ten who was still rummaging through the paper bag for his designated order. He pulled out a burger, unwrapped it, and dug in. You chuckled a little at his hunger, especially when he left out a small moan.

“Did they not feed you?” You laughed.

Ten tried not to talk, chewing faster to swallow and answer your question.

“I had to go through a diet woman, let me enjoy the love of my life.” He said.

You were back at the same place after prom two years ago. In his car, takeout on both of your laps. The only thing that made it different was where the takeout was from. Instead of going through Mcdonalds, Ten got both of you Shake Shack. The promise he made two years ago but was never fulfilled because he was a broke high schooler.

You dipped the fries in one of your milkshakes, munching and groaning in bliss. Ten opened his mouth, whining a little to gain your attention. Like usual, you dipped the salty grease in the sweet dairy, delivering it to his mouth.

“How’s life now?” You asked him. His hand offered out the bitten burger in his hand and you took it, taking bites from it as you waited for him to answer.

“It was hard. But I survived, I’m here.” He said, laughing in the process.

There was a small moment of silence, neither of you spoke. You took small sips from your milkshake while Ten was munching away on his burger. You kept on glancing at Ten, a distant gaze in your eyes. There were a lot of questions in your mind, still spinning and left unanswered. Ten noticed the glances you threw at him, noticed how you gazed upon him with concern and curiosity, but also fear as if he might disintegrate once your eyes leave him.

“Are you staying?” You asked. Ten stopped, ears ringing a little.

You didn’t hear from him for a moment. Nervously, he would divert his attention from his food towards the view. He cleared his throat, looking at you a little before placing his unfinished food back in the paper bag.

“Let’s… go to your place. Netflix like usual?” He said.

You froze, not knowing how to process the whole situation. Lost without much thought, you mindlessly nodded at him. Just like that, he pulled back and drove to your apartment. Ten followed the GPS as it led him further into your neighborhood. You had no idea what was running through his mind, his facial expressions impossible to read, consumed in his deep thoughts.

Ten never realized how two years could change someone so drastically. You were out from your parents’ house, renting a decent apartment near your campus, filling your empty time with part time jobs. He had seen the way you interacted with people, the way you would smile or sometimes joke with them caught him off guard. Especially since he knew how socially awkward and shy you used to be with strangers; he found it amusing.

When you unlocked the door, opening it wide to welcome him into your personal space, Ten silently went in. You rushed to the kitchen and took a glass of water, gulping it down to quench the dryness of your throat. Ten helped himself, taking a new glass and filled it. You directed him towards your room, taking the historical laptop you’ve had since high school, allowing him to start the show as you washed up.

Ten heard the small noise from the closing door. His eyes glued at your retreating figure, sighing when he saw you being swallowed by the other room.

He hadn’t meant to ignore and go missing, he had dreams. Ten would always feel guilty for suddenly disappearing without any context, it was all due to his own contract within his company. Ten had spent the last few years locked up, practicing in order to achieve his dreams of becoming a successful performer. Other than that, Ten’s mind wandered towards you.

He thought about the kiss.

Remembering every single luscious moment of it, playing in his mind like a broken record. He still felt his heart beating like crazy, thinking he lost his chances when you exposed your crush around him but never once telling him who the crush was. He thought it was a stage in life where he was losing you, seeing you slip away between his fingertips. Hence, he restrained. Ten opted to be more cautious around you, fearing his attachment might go wilder.

The growing distance taught him a lot of things. How much more capable you were in life, how you were okay without him in your life. He thought he didn’t have the chance, he lost you during the process.

Ten was in love with his best-friend, with you, since forever.

He had his fair share of stages when he fell in love. The problem was he failed to realize that he had already been in love with you since you were young. Ten was in denial, opting to run away from you. Thinking how impossible it was to fall for his own best-friend, someone who was always there, and someone who was always there to look after him despite how he came back into your life so abruptly.

Ten ran away. He thought if he dated someone else, the feeling would go away. He thought wrong.

Every single person he dated had been nothing but odd. They never gave him the same joy, rush of adrenaline whenever he was around you. Their touch felt foreign on his skin, he found himself wanting to feel your touch on him forever, longing for it every time you pulled away from him. He didn’t feel butterflies from his given nicknames from his past ex-lovers, but the butterflies swarmed him when you called him an idiot or plainly by his name. You had made him crazy, and he wasn’t hating you for it.

Ten was in love, but he was scared to admit it. He opted to run away, thinking the feelings would go away eventually. He thought it was simple, he was only too attached to you, to the point he could only think about you. He went missing, gone without giving any news of his departure towards you.

But the more he ran, the more he felt the longing feelings reaching out towards you. Wanting nothing but to be enveloped in your embrace, dumb conversations late at night, random movie nights till dawn. But he also had the idea of having you as his partner, his lover, his partner in crime, his everything. He wanted you in his life, yet he feared losing you might be easier if it happened.

The growing distance only made him want you more, miss you more. He noticed love wasn’t so simple, it wasn’t easy to get rid of. Unlike water where you can wipe it off without leaving any stain—love, is thicker than water.

“Hey.” He called out when you walked out of the bathroom, hair damp from your shower. You perked up at his voice, snapping your head towards him, fully giving him your attention.

“Let’s hang out after your class, tomorrow.” Ten stated, or more like demanded. You nodded.

A month since you last saw him, Ten started entering your life once again. He made it seem like nothing ever happened, as if the two years was nothing but a short two weeks break.

Ten didn’t show you any sign of awkwardness or hesitation, he straight up jumped right in.

It was becoming more frequent. Meeting him after class or after work, getting dinner together, him accompanying you during tests weeks, bringing you coffee or sending you off to campus in the morning.

Desperation, exhaustion, and longing.

He felt as if he was always there, as if he never had left. But that two-year gap would never be filled. It was an endless void, consuming both of you, testing you, and pushing both of you to see who would break first.

Both of you broke at the same time.

“Was it really the heat of the moment that led you to kiss me?” You started the conversation. He had brought you to the nearest coffee shop in hopes of accompanying you in finishing your assignment. You, on the other hand, had other things in mind than the given project.

It had bugged you the moment Ten came back, the moment he came into your life once again as if he was never away.

You took your eyes away from your laptop, gazing at Ten who was avoiding your gaze. His eyes wandered around the small café, memorizing the minimal interior, enjoying the warm vibe the space portrayed, then he finally rested his eyes on yours.

“No.” He said.

“You lied.” You said. For the first time in his life, Ten lied to you.

Ten smiled sheepishly, shaking his head a little, amused by your unending questions. You waited for his answer, patiently you waited for him to speak first, continuing to type away on your laptop.

“I’m sorry for disappearing.” Ten spoke out. You hummed at his answer, letting him know none of it mattered. You were more than ecstatic seeing him back, those two years was erased or seemed like they ceased to exist.

“Were you afraid of something, Ten?” You asked him again. Ten didn’t voice out his answer, but from the look of shock in his eyes, you knew.

“It’s me.” You said as your eyes gazed at him sadly.

Ten felt his heart hammer, how it plummeted when he noticed the hurt in your eyes. He groaned internally; everything, it was all his fault.

“You were running away from me.” You stated. Ten didn’t answer, he swallowed the lump in his throat, feeling how dry it had gotten.

“You knew, I like you. That I’m in love with you.” You said. He winced at the confession, felt the desperation in your voice as you spoke.

“I love you, Y/N. I love you but I was scared.” He whispered out, soft and only audible towards you.

You abruptly stood up, taking all your belongings into your hand. Hugging all of them desperately, struggling to fit them all in the small space of your arms. You rushed your movements, dashing out of the café, you were sure you probably had made a scene, especially with Ten running out straight after to catch you.

“Listen, please.” He said desperately, heart drumming louder in fear.

You pulled away from him, causing your books and papers to fly out of your hands and land on the ground. You crouched down quickly, stuffing them sloppily into your bag. You knew Ten was still there, crouched to help you gather your stuff. You could feel his gaze run around from the ground to you, most likely with concern and fear.

“I’m sorry.” You snapped your head upwards and look at him.

Ten could feel his heart shatter. The red eyes, puffy and ready to cry, your whole body was already shaking due to the rush of emotions and adrenaline. The mixed-up feelings and longing were consuming you, never had you felt alone in a room filled with people, where all eyes were trained on you and Ten.

“Cut the crap, Ten.” You hissed out, tears streaming down your face, dropping to the ground.

“I should’ve told you—”

“You should’ve stayed! You left me, alone for two years without telling! Two years, Ten!” You snapped, feeling the tears flow down. One then another, it was a continuum by now.

“I was selfish, I didn’t know what was going through my mind. I’m truly sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt—”

“Ten.” You choked out, stopping him abruptly.

“Why?” He asked. You looked at him, confused.

“Why didn’t you tell me that you like me?” He asked again. You shook your head a little, a little in disbelief at his pushy behaviour by now.

“Because of you!” You snapped out and ran.

You didn’t care if Ten was tailing you from behind, trying to stop you. All you wanted was to run away from him, be alone for once. Ten didn’t have the right to pry into your life, not knowing how much you had sacrificed for him, and he decided to come back as if nothing even mattered.

His calls and texts were constant, coming into your phone with no end. You were bombarded with his spams, words of concern, plead for forgiveness, everything. You shunned away from Ten, afraid to meet him after the whole incident, fearing you might hate him if you did see him once again.

It took him another month before he showed up, on your front door of your apartment. You had the thought of him barging in, like those scenes from romcom movies where the guy fight for the girls’ love. Instead, Ten had his hands on the spare keys you gave him when he came back, easily slipping in without making any damage. Like the night after graduation, he stood around the doorframe elegantly. Tall and lean figure leaning on the sleek wood, eyes piercing around yours, lips pressed into a thin line as he was unsure of his next act.

“Do you want to get lunch?” He asked. You could hear his voice shake, causing it to come out like a mere whisper.

You wanted to throw him off, lock yourself further into your apartment, you did none of those. Instead you gave him a simple nod, and that was enough for him to pull you out of your own bubble once again.

***

“A rebound.” You said.

Your gaze rested on your food in your hand, playing with it with your utensils as you listened to his blabbering. Ten sighed a little and shook his head softly, both finding it hard to eat. He brought takeout once again, both of you locked in his car facing the Han river once again, but in broad daylight with his AC blasting.

“I didn’t want you to be a rebound, I was confused.” He said.

“I thought it was impossible if I fell in love with my own best-friend, you were there since…everything! And I thought if we did date, things will fell and I will lose you far easily!”

“Have you ever thought what I wanted?” You asked him, turning your body to face his direction. Ten swallowed a lump on his throat, shakes his head a little.

“Ten, I love you. I still do and that night I thought we had something.”

“I was scared, I was a coward. I didn’t realise that I’ve been in love with you for so long, and I chose not to acknowledge it!” He said, frustrated at this point. You stayed silent, listening to him this time.

“I thought liking you wasn’t going to work out, it scared me. And I chose to run away dating these people I don’t even feel much, thinking that my feelings will change. But oh wow, you are so fucking addicting.” He groaned; a hand ran up his face to his hair in frustration.

“You got me crazy, thirsting for you every single time you weren’t there. Everything wasn’t the same without you around me, Y/N. I came to realise that all too late.” You smiled a little.

Ten caught that small grin of yours, not knowing fully if it’s a bad or good reaction. Your smile widens more, breaking into a Cheshire grin and then you proceeded to laugh. At this rate, Ten was either scared or confused, but he waited patiently until you finished.

“I guess that two years long break was enough for us to clear our mind up” You stated.

Ten didn’t say much first, thinking about it for a while. When he caught the small gaze you direct at him, he knew he had to say something.

“Like what people said, distance makes the heart grows fonder. They weren’t wrong, it was odd not having you around me, and it made me realise a lot of things.” He said.

“And what are those things?”

“That no one can replace you, that you will be that only person I’ll truly love and long for.” Ten said, softly gaze upon you.

Two years. As distance grow and both of you grew older, maturing into adults, those were enough to make both of you realise how despite distance can change a lot of things, both still longs for the similar person. The touch they had lingering around, the smile that will light up your day, the voice which rang around your ears, the name that was enough to give you a surge of butterflies.

The growing time and distance weren’t enough to pull both of your feelings away. He kissed you that day, with meaning. Soft and delicate, afraid he might break you if he put more pressure. You could feel his tears running from his eyes, knowing too well he was tired, emotionally drained. You smiled in the kiss, pulled him in for more, wanting more. You loved him, he loved you.

And for the first time, both of you thought the whole world revolves around you. That was enough to make things official.

Two years, as time passed and distance grew.

Both of your feelings still remained the same, after all love is thicker than water.

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