#like shitty druids

[mochapanda]

what if i made a giant detailed dungeon meshi world map

[raviraaa]

[s03e12 - The Coming of Arthur ]

Druids: We can’t just hand you over the cup of life. It’s a powerful-

Arthur: Fine. What can I do to convince you?

Druids: Enter a permanent union, with him *nods at Merlin*

Merlin: WHAT?!

Arthur: …

Arthur: You’ll give me the cup of life and all I have to do is marry Merlin?

Druids: Yes

Arthur: Great. Then let’s get this over with.

Merlin: Have you lost your mind?! I can’t marry you.

Arthur: Why not?

Merlin: because … i … we … i don’t know?

Arthur: Wonderful. Now we have that cleared up, let’s start. We don’t have rings, but will this do? *hands over his Mother’s sigil*

Druids: *can’t believe it was that easy* Sure.

Merlin: WTF? *denied feelings are secretly rejoicing*

[hanzajesthanza]

also regis swearing at stygga is so meaningful to me because he swore over milva’s dead body and also in front of angoulême (and assumedly cahir too)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[tamagotchikgs]

my sister spontaneously dropped that we were going to see a movie today literally a second before we left n on the way i found out it was dungeons n dragons and oh. oog,, my god,,, i have been putting off seeing this movie for so long bc i physically cannot contain myself ab dnd i get too excited but itwas so fucking good,,,, one of the best movies ive seen in years it was so silly n whimsy n dnd as hell and i think it wouldve been a great movie even if i wasnt autisically abnormal ab dnd as an interest,,,,,,,,, probably

[goldenhallas]

20 TAV/OC QUESTIONS

I saw saw @galesdevoteewife's post about her Tav & decided I wanted to do it too :) I'm tagging everyone who wants to do this & pls tag me if you do, I love seeing people's Tavs! <3

Senna, my scrunkly half wood elf ranger/druid/favoured of mielikki blorbo who was quite literally raised by wolves :) <3

I. what do they smell like at their freshest? (and/or after a tenday. your choice)

She generally smells like wolf fur, fresh earth, herbs and Felsul flower oil when she can make or buy it (Felsul are common in the Cloakwood where she grew up but she can't always find them while on the road).

II. what would their blood taste like to vampires?

Crisp, a little sweet, and a little tart, like an apple.

III. how would they kiss their LI?

Sen doesn't do anything by halves; she kisses passionately, fiercely, with wild abandon. She doesn't hold anything back and gives all of herself when she loves someone.

IV. how do they sleep with their LI (what position, does one steal the blankets, is one too hot/cold, etc)?

She loves being warm and cosy and cuddling. Without Gale she always sleeps snuggled up with her wolf, Fey, but when she sleeps with Gale it's with her face nuzzled into the crook of his shoulder, his arms wrapped around her and their legs tangled together, or they switch between being the big spoon or little spoon depending on the night/what they feel like.

And Fey is still included of course! If she's sleeping facing Gale, her wolf sleeps at her back. If she's sleeping with her back against Gale, she's cuddling Fey and her face is snuggled into her fur <3

V. what does their tent area look like? where do they prefer to pitch their tent (next to water, covered on three sides, etc)?

Her tent is a simple muted green, made to blend in with the forest. Inside she has a raggedy patchwork blanket, a bedroll, an old velvet pillow for Fey, a small wooden box of needle and thread for patching up her clothes, some ink pots, quills and a stack of journals. Outside she has a few small plant pots where she grows herbs and tea leaves and whatever weed she smokes in her dad's old pipe lol

VI. if they had a set of dnd dice, what would they look like?

These Feywild dice I found on the nexus (they're what I use in game)

VII. do they collect anything (gems, bottles, keys, etc)?

She collects random things that catch her eye like rocks, gems and feathers, as well as herbs, and she's also very sentimental so if anyone gives her anything, she keeps it (like the story Mirkon wrote her after she saved him, for example). When she gets into a relationship with Gale she starts collecting recipes to cook with him, plus all the poetry he writes for her, as well as poetry she comes across that she thinks he'll like (she doesn't write poetry herself).

VIII. if either, are they part of the astarion/gale book club (magic & literature) or the wyll/shadowheart book club (trashy romance novels)?

She's part of the Astarion/Gale book club. She loves books on flora and fauna, and she's curating her own florilegium with descriptions and illustrations of all the herbs, plants, flowers and animals she comes across on her travels.

IX. if they had to be put in a “get along shirt” with a companion, who would it be?

Oh it'd be Lae'zel for sure. They're both very headstrong and confident and think their way is the right way, so in the beginning they butt heads and challenge each other a lot. Each grows to respect the other for their determination and strength over time, and they end up forming a strong bond because of it.

Woe be upon ye who tries to shove them into that shirt though, you'll end up on the wrong end of a Gith sword AND stuck with a hide full of arrows.

X. do they prefer speak with dead or speak with animals?

She only uses speak with animals, Gale uses speak with dead.

XI. what are their thoughts on clowns?

She's never seen one until the Circus of the Last Days, and she's not at all interested in them/doesn't really get it. She just does one of her little head tilts and looks at them like... hmm...what odd people...and then gets distracted by the dryad, who she absolutely moons over.

XII. their companions are gossiping about them behind their back! who is it and what are they saying?

It's probably Astarion and Shadowheart, and they're probably either complaining about how much of an annoyingly cheery, energetic morning person she is, or mocking her obvious lovesickness over Gale.

XIII. what makes them laugh? what does their laugh sound like?

Wolf antics, Gale's complaints whenever they have to sneak, Gale's comments while on the battlefield, Gale in general (their senses of humour are well aligned), Astarion's histrionics, Astarion and Shadowheart's snarky conversations, Karlach's jokes, Wyll's utter intolerance for poorly performed music, Lae'zel's mispronunciation of common words.

She laughs heartily, warmly, and without restraint - pretty much the way she does everything.

XIV. do they have any inside jokes among their companions?

She's not much of a "hey wanna hear this joke" kind of person, but she undoubtedly has things that are uniquely funny to her and her companions based on the experiences they had together, as you do when you spend a lot of time / go through a lot with people. Like, "Hey, remember that time..."

XV. what’s the description of their camp clothes in the inventory menu?

Her dress: a lovely dress made of a soft, well-worn green cloth, with flowers stitched into the bodice and an intricate woven belt around the waist (it doesn't have a description so I wrote this one).

Her boots: made of intertwining branches that wrap around the foot like nature's embrace.

XVI. what’s the description of their underwear in the inventory menu?

Again it doesn't have a description, but I imagine it'd say something like "Plain, simple cotton undergarments".

XVII. how do they celebrate their birthday?

She doesn't know when it is, so she celebrates the day her dad adopted her instead, which was Ches 3. She spends the day gathering berries and baking a pie with them, as that's what her dad used to do for her every year.

XVIII. what modern day tv show would they binge over a weekend? do they get their LI to watch with them?

She probably wouldn't watch TV much, but I think she'd enjoy nature documentaries, and she'd get Gale to watch with her and then blab random facts at him the whole time.

XIX. do you have a playlist for your tav? if so, what’s the title + description?

I'm in the middle of working on one, the title of and first song on it is Raised by Wolves by The Interrupters, and sums Senna up perfectly: My teeth got sharper, my skin got tough So I forgive you for your giving up For your giving up It doesn't matter, my life was shattered And my heart's got holes You left a child out in the wild And I was raised by wolves I was raised by wolves, ah-ooh I was raised by wolves, ah-ooh

Yeah, when you left and said goodbye Under the moonlight, we had to learn to stay alive In the wild

XX. if you were to try pickpocketing them, what would they be carrying?

In her pockets she just carries some coins and hair ties, and in her backpack she carries her current leatherbound journal, a pot of ink, a couple quills, a folded piece of parchment that has been read many times (it's her favourite poem Gale wrote for her), maps, some healing potions, a satchel of herbs and other alchemy ingredients, trap disarming tools, travel rations (including a wedge of cheese with a big bite taken out of it), a waterskin, and a mess kit.

[separatist-apologist]

I was trying to impress Lae'zel and now Asterion is in love with me whoops

[kirishwima]

also guess who played a oneshot yesterday where both campaigns i play in merged, had to handle BOTH my characters at the same time, AND nearly killed both of them in the process? 🤡🤡

[in-tua-deep]

guess who showed up in my dream last night!

if you guess “early hobbit cartoon gandalf” then you were right!

[emeraldcreeper]

The bad thing about the emotional support old men I’m using like dolls in a dollhouse making them kiss (by saying now kiss and pushing their faces together) is that I do have to either find ways to not say that one old man finds the other “hot” or just give up and go I cannot keep saying attractive I need something a step more vulgar and sexy is too far, god damn it he’s gonna say he looks hot I hate this but it sure sounds in character even if it hurts me he would in fact say that

[primal-savagery]

baldur's gate oc: Velvela Dyre

This is what she actually looks like 99% of the time btw.

[hootnhoney]

Shitty Dnd Character Ideas

- a rat that was turned into a human by a warlock. They are desperately trying to act human while trying to hunt down the warlock that did this to them

- a changeling going through an identity crisis and joined the campaign on a quest to “find their self” (they just turn into whoever they kill)

- a bard that performs with yoyos and wants to prove themself to the yoyo master so that he will teach them. Because when they asked the master for help the yoyo master did not answer. He just kept on yoing.

-an old woman that tied knives to the bottom of her walker. She keeps offering pies to her enemies and telling people to “kill them with kindness” (the pies are poisoned)

- Chad, a human who thought he was joining a frat but actually joined a cult by accident. The cult members know this and keep him around cause they actually like him

- a character that is named after your dm and acts as much like your dm as possible

- a barbarian that has been seeing a therapist for their anger issues and has a lot of knowledge about psychology and mediation

- a british druid that keeps narrating everything like a nature documentary

[cactibarber]

bg3 companions ranked from worst to best cook

9) astarion

has not eaten human food in two centuries and doesn’t want to start now. since he mentions that wine tastes bad to him he’s probably like the vampires in wwdits and projectile vomits after eating so when it’s his turn to cook he just lays raw ingredients out for other people to deal with

8) shadowheart

has been living in a convent where she probably didn’t have to learn how to cook ever. overcooks whatever she does cook and tries to pass it off as a “style”. is the equivalent of a “one iced coffee for the entire day” girl so is surprised when people are still hungry after eating a small bowl of gruel

7) karlach

basically like a college kid in terms of scrounging together food and comes up with awful combinations. would be on an instant noodle diet if she could

6) minsc

only knows how to prep food for boo and no one else so it’s salads and fruit only (literally rabbit food)

5) lae’zel

food is important because it gives you energy to fight so you need exact amounts of it to bring your body to its full potential. what do you mean you don’t want to eat two boiled chicken breasts with a side of boiled potatoes. what about your calories

4) jaheira

now we’re getting into the actual decent cooks. makes very homestyle meals that leave you full, even if they’re not the fanciest and tastiest of meals. her kids always complain about her cooking but never leave home before eating a meal

3) halsin

the druids all take turn cooking so has had lots of practice. manages to make shitty ingredients actually taste decent but cooks a little bit like a health nut. at least you won’t feel bloated afterwards

2) wyll

grew up eating fancy ass food that he then tried to replicate when he was on his own. trial and error means he’s gotten pretty good at it too, although he swears that it’s not as good as he remembers it

1) gale

canonically is the best and does all the cooking and why wouldn’t he? fancy man living on his own in a tower is going to have a lot of time experimenting and developing recipes. loves showing others how he cooks (but isn’t the best teacher)

[nauticalastro]

Its 1am but lisyen to me. Grandma is the most normal out of their group of three. Like yeah obv she's weird he's A drawtective and also in season one he's such a fail and a loser who doesnt shower enough but transition saved xem so much like it has an apartment.. A job.. eats regularly (I just KNOW rosé and york completely forget to eat sometimes) etc and also shes literally Just Some Guy. York is a prince and rosé is an ex thief but listen to me listen to me. Im literally making all this next shit completely up but you must know they have a strained relationship with their family who couldnt care less about her as a person and only want him back with them so they have an heir and they wouldve cut contact if they weren't struggling with who would take over the business when whoever has it now is gone and she has such complicated feelings towards them because they're his parents and they're not a hateful person but obviously everything about it is shitty and she gets regular letters from them trying to get him back and xey never respond in any way (but they still read them and he doesnt know why because all it does is ruin her day) and he just doesnt think about it most times because he's got family now and xe is happy with dogwalking and detecting and druiding and maybe the first time one shows up post found familying it changes her demeanor completely and york and rosé know somethings wrong and ask and help them through it and she's not ever talked about their family in a non casual way before what then. They need to take away my head I'm just making shit up but Grendan highforge save me.. Save me grandma highforge..

[tongjaitongjai]

CrypticGod!Merlin and Worshipper aka fanboy Mordred CRACK AU - Part 3

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Merlin learns that being a god in semi-mortal form is very difficult when having a strong follower like Mordred.

Mordred, like many who pray to their god as some kind of anchor, will often pray something along the lines of ‘Emrys, give me strength and courage’ or ‘Emrys, please be with me through this difficult time’ unconsciously.

Except, unlike the normies, his commitment and belief are EXTREMELY STRONG, so when he prays strong enough, HIS GOD ACTUALLY SHOWS UP:

Arthur, charging him during sparring: Come on, Mordred! You can do better than this!!

Mordred: (anxiously praying) Emrys helps me

Merlin, suddenly appears between Arthur and Mordred, with Arthur about to smash him with the sword: THE FUCK—

Obviously, he is banned from praying during sparring, but occasionally Merlin will still pop up out of nowhere when he is anxious, and the knights eventually have to get used to it:

Arthur: Today, the neighbouring kingdom’s knights will join us for the practice, and there will be some competitions. I hope all of you are ready to protect and uphold the honour of Camelot’s knights. Any defeat is unacc—-

Arthur:

Arthur: any defeat is understandable, for one must lose before learning true victory, so please don’t get too stressed, especially you, Mordred.

Mordred: How do you know I am stressed?

Gwaine, carrying Merlin, who pop up above his head the moment Arthur said ‘defeat’, on his neck : Yeah, I wonder how

As their relationship improves, the power of Mordred’s prayer gets stronger. Not only can Merlin feels his emotions and more in-depth thoughts through the prayer, it also affects Merlin’s power, in both endearing and also straight-up ridiculous ways.

Lancelot, whispers: You are very upset because of that Lord Asshole’s shitty comment toward the Druids, aren’t you.

Mordred, calm and composed: No, I am a knight of Camelot and a grown man, I will not be bothered by something so trivial. I am not upset at all.

Lancelot: You aren’t praying to Merlin now are you.

Mordred: How is that relevant?

Merlin: *BARGING INTO THE MEETING* *SHOOTING FIRE BEAMS FROM HIS EYE, DESTROYING THE PATH AS HE WALKS* *GRABBING LORD ASSHOLE BY A COLLAR THEN PROCEEDS TO GERMAN SUPLEX HIM ON THE TABLE*

Arthur, watching this happens for the third time this week:

Arthur: Mordred, we talked about this, you have to express your thoughts and feelings verbally, not by praying to Merlin

Merlin: Don’t force him Arthur! He will talk when he is ready!

Arthur: STOP SPOILING HIM YOU ARE JUST HAPPY YOU GET TO PUNCH NOBLES

Also, when he is extremely happy, he prays to Merlin as well, like ‘Thanks Emrys for all the good fortunes that happen to me today’

Elyan: Arthur complimented Mordred at training today didn’t he? Maybe saying something like ‘you are going to be one of Camelot finest knights soon’

Percival: How do you know??? you were not there today????

Elyan, watching Merlin’s skin glows, not even in an oh so beautiful ethereal way but like a radioactive sun way: It’s .. hard to miss…

The first time Mordred wins a tournament, Merlin radiates for three days straight. His voice also sounds godly with all the weirdly smooth echoes and harp melody complimenting his every word. Mordred is exhilarated. Arthur is going insane. Merlin finally officially bans Mordred from praying to him.

[avocado-writing]

hi! it’s crazy seeing you write for bg3 (in a good way, it’s my new hyper fixation) when i used to read your writing for bullet train obsessively.

if it’s ok, i’d like to request astarion, wyll, and halsin’s reaction to their s/o having a hard time in life in general. i thought retail would get easier after the holidays but it made people even more entitled and i just want to cry and quit-

awww hell yeah boss same hyperfixation! 🤝 sorry about your job babe. I’m in a similar situation working in hospitality :( I’m sending you all my love. bg3 Taglist: @ghosti02art @sadandanxiouswtf @yeethaw13 @trappedinlimbo15 (comment if you’d like to be added!)

Astarion

I think comfort doesn’t come easily to him, because he’s so used to deflecting things with humour or sarcasm.

But when he sees how unhappy you are he steps up. nothing gets to make you feel bad. nothing.

Swallows his pride and asks the others in the camp the ways that help them feel better (due to being a vampire for so long he needs a little guidance, bless him)

makes an effort to get your favourite foods and be sure you’re eating correctly if he sees you’re neglecting your appetite.

gets you to bathe by playfully seducing you into the water (“oh what a lovely clear lake, and so deliciously secluded. I think I’ll just take a dip if you care to join me…”)

holds you at night and doesn’t say anything when you cry, just rubs his hand up and down your back and keeps you close. He wants you to know he’s there for anything.

when you wake up he’s curled around you, shielding you from the world.

Wyll

My man has had some shitty times in his life, but is generally quite chipper.

encouragement all the time. “You’re doing so well!” “You are truly amazing, my love.” “You can do this, I know it. I’m right here for you.”

he knows your favourite things, has them committed to memory - so he always likes to surprise you with gifts that make you light up with a smile.

lots of physical touch. A hand on the small of your back when you’re walking, a kiss as he wanders past you - something to anchor you down to the world.

there for a gentle pep talk when things get too heavy. You can feel his love in every word he says.

Stays up to chat as late as you need, and makes sure you’re sound asleep before he beds down for the night, wrapping an arm around and holding you close.

Halsin

He’s a Druid. He believes in the healing power of nature.

“come, my heart. We’re going for a walk.” “Nooooooooo…” he just picks you up and puts you on your feet. No arguing.

you complain but the sunshine does make you feel better. It’s nice to walk in companionable silence, hear the sounds of the forest. The birds. The rustling of leaves.

eventually you start to talk about your feelings, and halsin is a wonderful listener. nods along quietly and offers advice when it’s needed or asked for.

sits you down in a clearing, just the two of you, and allows you to pour your heart out. Holds you if you cry. I just think sobbing into his huge chest would be so cathartic.

kisses the tears from your cheeks after. It makes you giggle, and he smiles.

“your laugh is favourite sound.”

[karlastarion]

I'm so curious about Kagha, because she's so different from Halsin. She and Halsin are both wood elves, and I get the sense that Kagha is probably not ~young~ but she's not nearly as old as Halsin. When you deal with the Shadow Druids, she's very quick to defer to him and treat him like a teacher she's disappointed. He probably mentored her, if he's chosen her as his second in command - though, I would bet it's in more of a general thing in the way that the First Druid is everyone's mentor, rather than the clearly more direct and specific mentorship he has with Nettie as a healer.

Canonically, Halsin isn't an exceptionally good leader. He's not bad at it, and he has good instincts. He correctly surmises that after the dust-up with Kagha and the tieflings, the Emerald Grove needs an outsider to step in and lead without being tied to any particular grudges or politics. That's savvy enough that I think Halsin was a good First Druid, he just wasn't especially good or great at it and clearly didn't like the position. At worst, I think he let some situations fester because of his focus on the Shadow Curse.

But I'm not ready to say that he didn't realize Kagha was a proverbial snake in the grass ~the whole time~, because I don't think she was. I think she was genuinely and recently radicalized by the Shadow Druids. I think she probably had something of an edge before, maybe she was a hardass or had a mean streak or something. Regardless of how I feel about the quality of the Shadow Druid subplot (which is that I think its pacing is meh and Kagha's face-turn is way too fast and kind of shitty), I think it speaks to the fact that her care for the Grove is genuine. That perhaps Halsin's failure with her wasn't in not realizing she was A Bad Person Actually, but in not tending to her insecurities or noticing that she might be feeling isolated, if she was so effectively shaken by the Shadow Druids' fearmongering.

The recent wave of IRL cults should have taught us all by now that everyone is susceptible to cult tactics if they're sufficiently scared and alone, and BG3 is a game riddled with various cults. You don't have to already be a bad person, or a stupid or weak person, to fall for them. And I think Kagha's story is way less interesting if you just think she's an evil power hungry shrew too stupid to keep herself from being radicalized.

She clearly has a nasty streak, but her apologies and regrets also sound sincere, if you manage to hear them. Even when she isn't "redeemed", she accepts her punishments, even if she does so bitterly and not believing she was wrong. And I have to wonder just how much of that mean streak is self-defensive rather than inherent in her, how much of it is that she struggles to admit failure and learn from it. Or how much is her modeling Halsin's level of single-minded commitment, picking a methodology or an action and throwing all of her weight behind it, even when it may no longer be working.

I wish characters like Kagha got nearly as much love and fandom development and benefit of the doubt as someone like Ketheric. I think she has a ton of potential for that, and way fewer crimes to her name than other fandom favorites who just happen to also be, you know. Men.