#king shit honestly what a babe

[sunnikos]

Akutagawa: How do you feel about electricity?

Atsushi: In general? I'm a fan

Atsushi: Would like the new apartment to have it

[chaoticace2005]

Why Vox needs to GET THE FUCK OVER THE RADIO DEMON:

(By Velvette, the only competent of the Vees)

(Her list for Valentino here)

1. He’s just not into you

2. We have better things to do than allocate company time to this.

3. He makes you look stupid

4a. He makes US look stupid (and Valentino already does that enough)

4b. Seriously how are we supposed to stop your boy toy from chasing whore around town when you can’t do the same with your ex? We need to set a (gag) good example for him.

5. What do you even see in him? Tacky coat. And that voice is so old-school.

6. You have two people who (reluctantly) want to work with you. Why spend energy on a guy who doesn’t?

7. This was seven years ago babe. Give it up.

8. I’m tired of finding your Alastor Body Pillow around the penthouse

9. Speaking of the body pillow, did you really have to spend 5k on it?

10. Company money should be used for COMPANY things. The fact we even have an “Alastor” budget is stupid. HE DOESNT EVEN GO HERE. ( @onesidedradiostatic )

11. He fucked off once, he probably will again.

12. Do you really want to fuck with someone who has the princess and king of Hell on his side?

13. It makes Valentino insecure about his sexual prowess, which is not good for anyone.

14. I have to LISTEN to him complain about it.

15. No matter how hard you try, nobody will ever beat “Susan” for #1 rival in that man’s heart. (Which is valid cause Susan SUCKS.)

16. Also you’re wasting company time by having Val put together shitty-Alastor look alike porns? Angel Dust does NOT look like Radio Demon ffs, I though Val was the blind one not you.

17. Your screens keep crapping out whenever you think about him, and we’re running out of ones in storage.

18a. I don’t want to keep having to go to overlord meetings for you because you’re having a breakdown over of he’ll be there or not.

18b. Speaking of breakdowns, STOP MAKING THE WHOLE CITY LOSE POWER.

19. You’ve taken over the entire office space with your Alastor-shrine. It’s not really an inconvenience, just creepy.

20a. Not to kinkshame but I walked in on you and Val fucking with Alastor-wigs on, REALLY?!

20b. Also I think you’re making Val insecure about his lack of hair.

21. STOP asking me to design Alastor-cosplay clothes for you. I don’t want anything to do with this.

22. I already have to deal with one pissbaby

23. Seriously, he isn’t into you. Maybe it’s cause you’re a mess. Maybe it’s cause he’s AROACE. Who knows.

24. You keep interrupting channels to brainwash people into hating the Radio Demon, when we should be brainwashing them into other things.

25. We can all hear you talking to yourself in the shower when trying to come up with shitty comebacks.

26. You display your dreams when you sleep, and while it was funny at first at this point it’s so boring. Val and I want to watch something actually interesting for once rather than the same shit.

27. You keep glitching out in bisexual whenever he comes up and it’s annoying waiting for you to put your shit back together again.

28. I’m sick of movie nights where we just watch your self-made compilations of “Alastor’s Epic Fails” or just watch security footage of him at the hotel.

29. Why do you even try and film him? Your shitty cameras can pick hardly anything up.

30. Honestly this whole thing is just pathetic.

31. Like it used to be cute but now?

[xxsabitoxx]

My Personal Hashira 🍆 Size Ranking

Warning: if it ain’t obvious, this contains smut lmao — therefore Muichiro is 100% not included in this. We’re talking about 🍆, length, girth, all the fun stuff. So if PPs make you uncomfortable keep on scrolling babes </3

A/N: these low key stress me out cause I feel like people can get pretty defensive over these types of Headcanons. Especially if my own thought differs from yours. Regardless, these are just my personal takes/HCs. My word is not law so do not be upset if my HC does not match yours / don’t feel the need to change how you HC these things to fit my POV. This is why I refrain from describing size in my fics, I want y’all to imagine it in a way that you like lololol

Lastly, idgaf if you see some of this as unrealistic, these are fake, fictional drawings of men, if I wanna give Gyomei a 44ft long 🍆, I can and will (I didn’t but you get the point.) Anyways enjoy my personal thoughts on this matter

1. Himejima Gyomei

Is anyone fucking shocked that this 7’2 (220cm) man is packing the biggest schlong among the male Hashira?

I mean let’s be logical real quick, his dick is as big as the rest of him. This man’s dick is dragging on the floor.

Soft: 11.2

Hard: 12.3

Call it unrealistic idgaf this man is LONG

Girthy too, he’s fucking beefy all over

This man’s dick will feel like he’s shoving his wrist up in there ong bro

It curves downward slightly when hard, I mean shit that thing is heavy, it stands no chance against gravity

2. Uzui Tengen

Again, the man is 6’6 (198cm).

Height comes into play when it comes to our two tank Hashira

Therefore none of you should be surprised that they are the top two

Soft: 9

Hard: 10.3

Your guts are getting rearranged, he knows the length he has but often underestimates how far he can go…

He’s long but doesn’t have a crazy girth to him, which thank fuck it doesn’t take as much prep to take him

He’s pretty straight when hard and manages to flex it and keep it up (he totally does dick tricks & you can’t convince me otherwise)

3. Tomioka Giyu

I’m standing by my “big dick Giyu” head canon. I just know this man is packing a weapon down there

What’s crazy is he wasn’t even aware of how good he had it until he overheard other corps members chatting

Soft: 6.3

Hard: 7.4

He’s got a decent girth and as weird as it may sound, it’s pretty, like really pretty to look at

When hard, it curves upwards and stands at attention which makes him a bit embarrassed

He knows how to use it, because of that he’s pretty confident in that aspect which is wild for him

He will also rearrange your guts unintentionally (or intentionally hehe)

4. Shinazugawa Sanemi

I don’t wanna hear one PEEP from any of you that Sanemi should be above Giyu.

My man is forth on the list but that ain’t mean shit, he’s still got a lot going on down there

Soft: 6

Hard: 7

He’s girthy, will tear you up girth, needs thirty minutes of prep minimum because of how wildly he fucks girth

He sticks straight out, no curve in sight and honestly looks like he defies gravity.

He’s like Tengen, can do dick tricks. But unlike Tengen he doesn’t make that known / show you lmao.

He’ll break your back, he may even hurt you (fully unintentional) if he gets too into it. That thing is fr a weapon

5. Rengoku Kyojuro

He’s fifth on the list but trust me he’s not lacking

He’s second smallest, but he’s not small, if you get what I mean. It’s kinda like how we rank the Hashira weakest to strongest but regardless they are still the strongest in the corps… that make sense?

Soft: 5.8

Hard: 6.8

He curves upwards, very prominent veins running along his shaft (heh, shaft)

Girth wise, he’s about normal. Not too intimidating but def offers you a good stretch, forgoing prep is real bold tbh

He’s a quick learner so he quickly masters how to fuck you

He will strive to go as far as your body will let him, so expect to be bruised / sore

6. Iguro Obanai

My king. He may be “smallest” among the Hashira men, but that doesn’t mean shit.

He’s not self conscious of his dick, he knows how to use it. He’s also pretty content with it’s size

Soft: 5.6

Hard: 6.5

See? You can’t come for me cause he ain’t even SMALL

Obanai’s dick is pretty, too. It curves upwards slightly, since he’s pretty pale, his veins are prominent

He’s got an average girth, he doesn’t need to prep you forever to get you ready. Which works in his favor cause he likes to “punish” you with no prep & going in raw

He can and will abuse your cunt, he’s not satisfied until you genuinely can’t walk without limping for a few days

[suzukiblu]

Day twelve of “obligatory sugar baby Kon” behind the cut. prev: (( chrono || non-chrono ))

Tim clears his throat and adjusts the collar of his shirt for honestly no good reason, and Kon keeps doing–Kon keeps beaming at him. There is just . . . there is just so, so much beaming happening right now, and it is very, very hard to concentrate on anything else. Or even, like, passingly think about anything else. 

Kon looks–he just looks happy, and Tim feels flustered and overwhelmed and vaguely nauseous, but like, in a good way, somehow, and . . . it’s a lot. Yeah. Just–Tim is currently feeling a lot of things, is all. Just . . . a lot. So much. 

Tim wonders if he could figure out a loophole to “legally” marry Kon despite the fact he’s fifteen and Kon is only maybe legally a person and/or citizen in the eyes of the government, because in that case even once Kon gets bored of Tim Drake he’ll be able to send him alimony payments or whatever, so– 

Actually, Tim realizes as he looks at Kon’s beaming face–at Kon’s beaming face beaming at him–and feels Kon’s hand still gripping his easily and comfortably, and Kon still leaned in closer than necessary even as they walk along the sidewalk together . . . 

Actually, he doesn’t feel like Kon’s getting bored with Tim Drake at all. 

. . . . . . huh. 

Weird, Tim thinks, a little too bewildered to figure out why he feels that way. 

“Oh, hey, that looks good,” Kon says, perking up a little more as he looks at something over Tim’s shoulder and points past him with his free hand. “We need a new dinner place, right? Wanna try it?” 

Tim looks where Kon’s pointing and frowns in confusion, because he’s pointing at a skate shop, of all things, not a restaurant or cafe or even a bar. 

“I haven’t touched a skateboard in months and also I have no idea what that has to do with dinner,” he admits, still frowning in confusion, and Kon laughs. 

“The food truck, babe,” he says with a snigger, pointing more emphatically. “You skateboard?” 

“Uh–sometimes, yeah,” Tim says, refocusing his eyes to realize–yeah, there is in fact a food truck there, parked just to the side of the skate shop. It’s very . . . yellow. Very, very brightly yellow. 

He can absolutely never, ever tell Bruce he missed something as obvious as a huge neon yellow food truck, Tim swears to himself, and then he actually registers what the truck says and . . . blinks, very slowly. 

“Is that the one-dollar grilled cheese truck?” he says. “I thought that was a meme or something.” 

“I mean, probably some bargain-basement content creator who thinks they're an influencer is running it as some publicity stunt shit, but one-dollar grilled cheese,” Kon says reasonably, except for how Tim cannot even imagine what about that statement would be “reasonable”. 

“You want to get dinner from the one-dollar grilled cheese truck?” he asks, a little incredulous about the idea. 

“We could get so many, babe,” Kon says with a gleeful grin. Tim, instinctively, is about to protest that they could get “so many” of whatever Kon wanted, in fact, and a truck that says both “cash only” and “no change given, figure out your own shit” in Impact font is literally just . . . what. What? But then he has a brief remembered flash of Dick saying there wasn’t any “one size dates all” and talking to him about circus tickets and tailoring dates to the other person's tastes and, well . . . 

“Um, sure?” he says, still vaguely bewildered. Kon needs more expensive tastes. He needs to get Kon more expensive tastes. And also maybe, like, better standards for a “nice” dinner. 

Kon beams at him again, giving his hand a squeeze, and Tim disassociates for a minute or two in an attempt to process any of that and entirely, entirely fails to. 

. . . alright, maybe some of Dick’s dating advice was helpful, he reflects. 

. . . . . . also to be fair, this also might be the Condiment King or some other D-lister about to start some shit, in which case it wouldn't hurt to throw a superhero at the problem anyway. 

And at least it's gonna be a lot of calories, right?

[girlboypersonthingy]

Hiii new anon here! Is it possible to request the Hazbin Hotel boys with a wheelchair user reader? (It’s alright if not! I love your writing so much! Keep it up! 💖)

Hellooooooo new anon 💋 thanks for the request! And THANK YOUUU ILYSM AAAHH 💖🥹 you guys have really been hyping me up. AND IM AT 40 REQUESTS RN LIKE ??? HELLO HI WHAT IS HAPPENING 😵‍💫 I hope I did okay on this…enjoy~

Notes: gn!reader, sorry this is short :(

TW: lap sitting, other than that just fluff :)

Hazbin boys x wheelchair user!reader 🎀

Lucifer 🍎

Often tries to push you around everywhere. He just wants to help but if that bothers you, he’ll happily give you space to wheel yourself around.

Will still do other things to help you out too like open doors for you, adjust tables so you can sit at them comfortably, goes to get you something you might have forgotten just so you don’t have to push yourself all the way back to it.

Sorry but he’s gonna very randomly and very frequently sit in your lap. He likes it, it’s comfy and it’s always right there fully open for him. He’ll just fall into your lap, wrap his arms around your neck and nuzzle his face up to yours.

Very helpful with other things you may need help with like reaching things that are too high up or assisting you when you need to get out of your chair for any reason.

WILL ABSOLUTELY PICK YOU UP AND CARRY YOU SO TIGHTLY AS HE FLIES YOU TO WHEREVER YOU NEED TO GO

“Luci, babe…this is kinda extravagant, don’t you think? I just needed to go talk to Husk, I can get myself there just fine.”

“Yeah, but I get to touch you this way~”

What a flirt, omffggg ❤️‍🔥

Angel Dust 🕸️

So many dirty jokes and horrible pickup lines.

“Oooh, best seat in the house~” as he sits on your lap before covering your face in giggly kisses

“Yeah, I think they fucked up their legs fallin’ for me.”

“Fuck you, Angel!” And now he’s cracking up laughing while also apologizing.

He’s actually kinda a worry wart so he’s gonna check up on you a lot. He knows you’re strong and brave and you’re used to this by now but he can’t help but worry about you all the time.

He knows you can handle yourself but he worries about others picking on you and taking advantage of your disability

His fav pastime is sitting in your lap while you wheel yourself as fast as you can down the long hallways of the hotel

Sitting in your lap while you do wheelies gets him squealing with laughter

He also offers to push you pretty much every day and if you say yes, he happily takes over while you sit back and relax. If you say no, he totally understands and follows along beside you still.

Very much understands any boundaries you have about you and your mobility. Hes a consent king okay?

Although he never asks before he grabs the handles of your chair and yanks you all the way back until you’re nearly parallel with the sky, then he smirks down at you before leaning in for a hot and passionate kiss. Not too long later, he sits you back up to your regular position and continues on his way, leaving you a blushing mess with your heart beating so hard you think you might die again.

And he never gets over the shocked face you wear every time he does that. He loves that shit 🩷

Husk 🃏

Okay this guy is so nonchalant about it like “okay cool…and?”

He sees that you are used to this, that you handle this with such grace and skill. You impress him everyday and he adores youuu~

Will often offer to help you up on the barstools if your chair is too low to reach the bar.

Holds doors for you, always runs to push the elevator button for you, just likes to go out of his way to be a gentleman for you.

Even if you insist you don’t need his help, he’ll argue, “Baby, you’re my partner. I think my love language is acts of service or some shit like that. I dunno, I tried to read the book and got tired. But I love ya so you’re just gonna have to get used to me and how I show love. Trust me, I’d do this stuff no matter what.”

He’s honestly just such a polite and considerate guy when it comes to you. He doesn’t never mean to be overbearing or treat you different, he just wants you to be comfortable so he always tries to push you around.

“Husky, I can push myself.” You sigh as he takes hold of the handles on your chair and brings you along to the bar with him.

“I know you can.” And he’s just smirking from behind you as you roll your eyes.

And his pace will slow for a sec as he leans over to kiss the top of your head.

He just really loves when he’s pushing you and he sees your head tilt back and your shoulders relax- you just seem calm

Sir Pentious 🐍

Homeboy is absolutely gonna try to invent and build cool shit for you. Mostly just cool add-ons to your chair like something to make it smoother or faster or more sturdy or even add a cup holder? Idk

If you ask him not to push you around, you will not have to tell him twice 🫡 he respects you and your boundaries

Buuttttt he is often seen resting one hand on the handle of your chair as he slithers along beside you throughout the hotel

He just wants to be touching you in some way and touching your chair is enough for him.

Loves to come bounding up to you with exciting new projects he’s working on and will wrap his entire self around you as he shows you his work

“Pen? Can you push me back to my room? I’m just so tired…” you ask him after a long day of helping out around the hotel therefore a long day of pushing yourself around.

He’s actually so excited and full of love rn, like he’s beaming with joy as he nods and rushes to you.

“Yesssssss, my darling! Anything for you~”

And he’s so fucking careful with you- we all know Sir Pentious is a clutz and a goofball but he is so extra cautious when pushing you around.

Makes sure not to bump your feet or knees or any other part of you into anything.

Goes sooooooo slow over any bumps, humps or ledges.

Asks like 457 times if you’re okay and smiles everytime you say “Yes, babe. I’m good. Thanks.”

Vox 🖥️

Does not mean to offend but he tells you he would happily build something that could have you up and walking with ease.

If you’re down to try, he’s more than happy to experiment!

If you’re more than happy staying in your chair, he completely understands but still tries to give your chair some upgrades.

Adds a phone to your chair so you can always contact him

Also watches your every move everywhere you go through his cams bc he doesn’t want some dickhead to think they can take advantage of you

Loves when you come into his work room where all his screens are bc it’s a bit crammed in there so it can be hard to get your chair around. Therefore, Vox loves to pick you up and sit you in his lap while he works.

He’ll press soft kisses to your neck and let his claws travel up and down your arms as you melt into him

And when you finally ask to go back to your chair, it turns into a playful fight.

“Aww, (Y/N). I was just getting comfy. What if I just keep you here.” As he hugs you tight, speaking in a teasing tone.

“Vox, I swear to Satan! You better put me back in my chair right now or-“

“Noooo~ I don’t think so.”

And he just continues to enjoy your company even as you pout and huff.

Alastor 🩸

Always uses his shadow or his tentacles to lift you up and whisk you around.

Doesn’t ever really ask for permission or even warn you before he picks you up and carries you to and from your chair.

“Oh! Alastor. I can do it on my own. Really, I’m fine.”

“Nonsense, sweetheart. The pleasure is all mine. What kind of partner would I be if I didn’t assist my love with getting around?”

He doesn’t have much of a filter, nor does he understand boundaries or personal space

So he will just grab ahold of you and wheel you around to his hearts content regardless of your protests.

One time, he unexpectedly rolled you up to his radio tower, wearing a particular cheery smile.

“Come, dear! I’m just about to start my podcast. Care to join me~?” He holds his hand out to you from across the room, waiting for your okay

As you give him a nod, his shadow lifts you and carries you to him as he sits at his desk, you being lowered down onto his lap soon after.

“Lucky you! Up close and personal for tonight’s show. Aww, and look at those flushed cheeks! What a doll you are~”

Alastor loves to sit you in his lap and then make fun of how flustered you get. It doesn’t happen often, him getting all close and touchy with you so when it does happen, you always panic and start stuttering.

He really gets a kick out of you being in a less than ideal situation and not being able to get out of it without him letting you. He’s a sick fuck, what’d you expect? He does it out of love~ ❤️‍🔥

[o-pandora-o]

Dating Beleth Headcanons (SFW and NSFW)

Note: This is NOT SPOILER FREE. After playing the event and have unlocked few of info via intimacy, I am currently hungry of Beleth content. Please be advised that this is not spoiler free and will connect a few info from the event or intimacy info. Writing this before I completed 100% of his intimacy info (currently at 27%). Writing in gender neutral pronouns.

How is it like dating the de facto King (in terms of what he does) - Right hand of Belphegor - Beleth?

🚬 One of the loyal green flags in Hell, once he picks someone to be his partner, don't expect him to entertain others. He might have the charisma to get along with others; however, he will definitely not entertain others who flirt with him when he's taken. He'd politely say "Hahaha. Sorry to break it to you pretty boy/girl, I'm already taken", bonus points if they flirt in front of you, he'd hold your waist and pull you close to him, no questions asked.

‌🚬He would definitely call you cute pet names such as "kitten", "kitty", "baby", and "babe". He like cute things, so he'll call you something cute too wink wonk.

🚬He isn't picky when it comes to his partner, he mostly looks at what's inside rather than what's outside. He doesn't care of your gender, nor your physical appearance. Whether your thin, chubby, plus-sized, or small. He'll love you, since he chose you to be his partner out of the many people he slept with.

🚬His love language is Act of Service, similar to Valefor, he'd do anything because you deserve everything. He may look like a bad boy, but he's a good guy at heart. He'd hold the door for you. He'd take your bag whenever you go out. Honestly, he's quite used to this because he takes care of his king - Belphegor.

🚬‌If you're feeling sick he'd take a leave from the palace and take care of you. He'd cook your comfort foods, provide comfort and warmth. Even if you're not sick, he'd cook for you if he wakes up before you.

🚬‌He's also keen on things you once said. He might bring home some desserts or food if you mentioned something that you wanna try it. Or plan a date on a newly opened cafe because you once mentioned it.

🚬He always likes it whenever he does something for you, especially if you request something. He'd do anything just to make you happy. ‌His secondary love language is physical touch. He is purely consensual and will ask you if it will be okay to touch you (hold hands, hugs, kisses) especially if you're not the type of person that is fond of physical touch.

🚬He loves LOVES being the big spoon! He's pretty tall and loves seeing you all small in his embrace. He also likes to pat your head whenever you look so cute. Bonus if you pout, he'd laugh heartily.

🚬He's pretty neutral when it comes to PDA. He respects your personal space but if he needs to display his affection, he might do so. For example if one demon decides to flirt with you, not knowing Beleth is your s/o. "It seems you really are famous with the demons, no?" Beleth said to you "Sorry my friend, it seems they're already taken, Hahaha." He wraps his arms around you and pulls you close and kisses your forehead

🚬‌Doesn't get jealous easily. He trust you so much to the point that he doesn't get jealous when other demons talk to you. However, it will be another issue if he notices something fishy with the other party. He'd be more protective rather than jealous.

🚬‌He's fond of cute animals especially baby ones. He feeds stray cats and dogs, one some rare occasions he might bring home one. "Hi baby I hope you don't mind I brought home a small kitty. I was watching him for a few days now, he's all alone. I hope you don't mind haha." He cradles the small kitty like his baby, while making that sweet smile "But Beleth… that's the 10th cat this month…"

🚬‌He does not belittle anything or anyone, even his opponents or you. When he heard someone talking shit about you and your abilities he'd butt in and politely negate their comments. "Hahaha. I wouldn't be too sure of that, my baby can pack a punch you know".

🚬He's practically the son of the Black cat x golden retriever trope. He's so cool, chill, and he practically gets along with everybody. His aura screams bad boy but to you he's like a dog (or in his case, a cat) waiting for your orders and affection.

🚬‌He once thought that you might be scared of his demon cat form, but you proved him wrong. "Are you sure you wanna see it, y/n?" "Yes! Please!!" "You know I don't show this normally right? I just show this whenever I'm mad. Haha" A cold sweat drops from his forehead "Yes! Bathin told me that too! Even Harumon!! May I see it pretty please?" "Promise me you won't change how you look at me, mkay?" "I promise!!!" "Alright, a promise is a promise, okay?" He hesitantly transforms into a gigantic demon cat "…" You stared at him "Y/n…?" He meowed " YOU'RE SO FLUFFY AND CUTE SORRY I LIED I CHANGE HOW I LOOK AT YOU NOW OMG YOU'RE SO FLUFFY!!!" You run a hand into his fur and hug him He was happy and shocked that you enjoyed looking at his demon cat form

🚬‌He enjoys it if you run your hand into his fur, it makes him purr if you scratch certain places. He will sometimes wrap his body around you and it will be okay for him if you sleep on his soft fur.

🚬‌He gets a bit upset or sad if he can't see you in the days that he's busy with Belphegor's orders or errands. Honestly your competitor is his Majesty Belphegor himself in your time with Beleth. I wouldn't say Beleth is too busy like Bael, but he may be busy occasionally due to fights or troublesome issues. He might request Harumon to bring you something if he can't come home.

🚬He sometimes fight for fun, kinda similar to training. Hottest time is when he fights without a top on, when sweat trickles down his chest and abs. "Y/n please close your mouth and don't drool" Gusion said as he was requested to supervise so you wouldn't get hurt. He'd also enjoy it if you bring him a towel. "Hmm? Do you wanna wipe my swear, lil one? Just kidding haha" He likes to tease you

🚬The only time he'd lose his chill is if you're in danger and if the angels did something to you. "What did you do to them?!" "Oh ex-brother Beleth! I just removed the temptation from you! You were sinning and that person is-" The angel's head was cut off "Oh Beleth? Why are you here?" "Huh but I thought-" He saw you bought cat food and Bathin was behind you "Was guarding them like you asked" Bathin said as he saw the angel's head in the floor "Oh."

🚬‌He likes lighting up cigarettes(this is alr obvious because of his philia), bonus if you like it too. But if you don't like cigarettes (even the smell), he'd maintain distance to respect your preference (also so you won't smell it too strongly). However if you try to smoke (or if you already do) he'd really get turn on (again this is because of his philia).

🚬‌He always likes it if you dress up like a soft boy/soft girl or lolita. He always encourages you to dress up and not be shy of your preferences, since you dress up for yourself after all.

🚬Firmly believes that Beleth only have sex with people because of the NEED to sleep. But after you're with him, man he WANTS to sleep everyday. He's so comfortable with you that he wants to sleep (literally, wholesome) with you but his insomnia is stopping him. But hey you can help him sleep tho 👀

🚬‌He's pretty naughty sometimes. He'd slap your ass jokingly if you're cooking or doing something standing up, and he won't apologize but makes the most flirtatious smirk. He would often tease you especially if it makes you pout and he'd laugh about it. He would also engage in dirty talks if he seems a bit bored.

🚬His member is pretty big, and I'd say BIG, it's probably bigger than Beel's and it's girthy. Good thing Nilfheim has good pants (fuck those pants) you can't see his bulge or whenever he's having a boner when he see you all flushed up and squirming from his dirty talks or even if you lit up a cigarette for him.

🚬‌He'd like it whenever you sit on his lap (he doesn't care if you're heavy, he's a demon with demon strength anyw). However, he will like it even more if you decide to cockwarm him. He likes seeing you squirming on his lap, begging to move. He'd grip your thighs and whisper dirty things in your ear. He'd even bite or lick your earlobe. "Mmmm Beleth please can I m-move?" "Lil oneee, you said cockwarming right? Be a good girl/boy and sit still mkay? I'll reward you later" His one hand hold your thighs, while the other wraps around your waist and he nibbles on your ear 🚬‌He's a dominant top however, if you're feeling frisky, he's willing to be submissive for you.

🚬He'd praise you and pat your head in bed. "Mmmm you're doing great little one. Hm you're so tight for me now are you, baby? That's a good girl/boy" *He pats your head and he also whispers "Do you want me to touch you, baby? Mmm you're so good for me today" ‌Prolly has size kink in addition to his philia, he likes seeing his towering figure above your small figure whenever you take him. He's favorite positions being Missionary and Side windher.

🚬‌He LOVES marking you. He's not really possessive but he always laughs and feels proud whenever someone asks you or looks at your love marks and you always become flustered to answer.

🚬After sex, he always looks at your disheveled look, like some masterpiece he made and he was the painter (i mean if cum was paint then he is). He always enjoyed looking at your cum filled holes (and body) and his marks in your body. ‌He's fond of aftercare. He'll help you clean up and take a bath or shower. You in front of him while he cleans you. He'd also prepare some comfy towels and a bathrobe before falling asleep together with you. He'd sleep hugging you with a smile in his face.

A contribution to the WHB Server that I'm in! Hungry for Beleth for this past few days. Special thanks to my friend K for being hungry with me and reviewing some similarities we thought of Beleth. Will probably update this once i got a hold of his 100% intimacy information and voice.

Masterlist

[szasfuckingwife]

GUESS WE BOTH AIN’T SH*T

YAKUZA!TOJI FUSHIGURO X FEM!READER

SYNOPSIS: YOU AND TOJI’S RELATIONSHIPS HAS SEEN ITS FAIR SHARE OF ARGUMENTS. AFTER HE CHEATS, AND AFTER YOU DO THE SAME, YOU ARE REMINDED OF WHAT DREW YOU TO HIM INITIALLY.

WARNINGS: Smut, Swearing, Toxic relationship, Toji Fushiguro

It’s 11pm at night and you are sat in Toji’s bathtub. He’s been out all night, leaving you in his luxurious apartment alone. When it comes to you and Toji, things are certainly complicated. There are those nights where you’re both laid up on his (extra) king sized bed and he’s promising you marriage, kids and a better life.

But there are also nights like when he called you whilst another girl’s mouth was around his dick. It alright though because you made it equal by sleeping with one of his partners.

That was just how you and Toji operated: he’d cheat, you’d cheat back, he gets jealous, you get angry at his jealousy.

Then, you fuck, he gets you flowers and jewellery and repeat!

As you soak yourself in the bathtub, a twang of sadness upsets you. The thought of such a toxic relationship never crossed your mind when you were younger. Toji was so sweet in the beginning, what went wrong?

Suddenly, you hear the door slam. Knowing that your boyfriend is home, you take another sip of your wine before getting out of the bath.

“Babe?”, he yells to no answer. You roll your eyes and wrap your naked body with the fluffy white robe.

The raven haired man smirks as he sees you walk towards him, “How’s my girl?”. His open arms are slapped away by you, earning a grunt.

Toji’s not one to back down from a challenge, especially from you. He watched as you put the wine bottle back in it’s cabinet, chuckling at how you can’t quite reach the top.

“Don’t wanna ask for help?” Toji asks, taking off his jacket. “What’s up with you?”

You scoff, “What’s up with me? Seriously? It’s almost midnight.”

A sigh escapes his lips. He knows exactly how to make you putty in his hands, but you don’t let him, “I was caught up… business-”

“You can cut all that bullshit right now because Sukuna said you were at the club.” You cut him off.

He stands across from you with a smirk on his face. For the first time in years, Toji Fushiguro was silenced. He had nothing to say, no excuses, nothing. “Sorry?”

“Fuck you.” Every emotion within you is amplified by his stupid response. Why does he have to look so good whilst being so annoying? It’d be a lie to say you hate him, you love him more than life but it’s like he wanted you to hate him.

Toji follows you to the bedroom, trying to grab your arm when you pull away, “Babe, look at me. Stop. Stop!”

“You always do this shit, Toji! Just tell me, were you fucking someone else tonight?!”

A scoff erupts from his mouth. You must be stupid if you think you can challenge him, Toji thinks. “You’re forgetting that you were the one who actually fucked someone else first.”

He meets the back of your head as you begin to pace around the room. Toji knows exactly what buttons to press and on any other day, his teasing would get you wet. But not today. “You called me whilst getting head from a bitch!”

“You sent me a video of you fucking Shiu!” He chuckles, “We’re even!”

You roll your eyes, “That was an accident! Toji, get over it!”

Another chuckle emits from him, “And if a girl sucked my dick tonight, that was an accident too…”

He watched as you open your mouth to say something but he quickly stops you, “But no one sucked my dick! You need to trust me, Y/N.”

“Fuck off. I’ll never trust you!” With some bravery, you get into Toji’s face, as if you’re trying to intimidate him. If Toji wasn’t so pissed off, he’d laugh at how cute you look. But Toju was mad, fuming even.

“And I could never marry a bitch like you-” “Thank God!” You smirk, “Shiu’s cock was bigger anyway-”

Suddenly, Toji’s lips press against yours, forcibly. His kisses aren’t as soft and chaste as you remember, this one feels like he hates you. And, honestly, something inside you feels like you hate him.

But you kiss him anyway.

The feeling of his lips on yours is short as he finds his way to your neck. His hands quickly travel to the strings of your robe, unravelling it to expose your naked, scented, smooth body.

“Fuckin hell…” he whispers. “You’re so sexy, baby..”

“Shut up..!” You moan lowly as you feel his hands on your breasts. He slowly guides you to the bed, pushing you back and spreading your legs.

Both of your eyes are locked on each other as he licks the tips of his fingers and slowly circles your clit. A whimper leaves your lips at the feeling of Toji. As previously stated, Toji knows exactly what buttons to press.

“Toji….fuck!”

“It feels good, huh, baby?” He whispers in your ear as his fingers pick up the pace. By now, you’re practically soaking the sheets. The pleasure that your boyfriend was giving you mixed with the feeling of jealousy made you feel much more weak than you did before.

“You see, this is how it is with you. You can’t have your cake,” He halts his movements, “And eat it too…”

You whine loudly, “Toji..”

This is exactly what Toji did best, punish you. You had another mans dick in you and ‘accidentally’ sent him the video of it?

Yes, he said it’s all in the past. Yes, it happened months ago. But Toji can forgive. What he can’t do is forget.

The sadistic Yakuza boss continued his game with you. Edging you until you felt close to making a mess all over his silk sheets just before pulling away and ripping that feeling away from you.

It wasn’t long before you were a fucked out mess below him. “I need to cum, Toji. Please, I’m sorry…” a helpless cry came out of you.

All he had to do was kiss your forehead and you knew that he’d finally grant you your wish.

He lowered himself in line with your sopping, wet pussy before hungrily eating you out. You could feel his tongue inside you whilst his other hand was still focused on your clit.

Involuntarily, your hand seeps it’s way into his messy locks, gripping them tightly. You can feel his smirk against your sex as you chant for him to ‘not stop’.

And, as before, Toji grant’s your wish.

“I’m cumminnngh..!” You moan uncontrollably. His tongue is still relentless in fucking you. The feeling of cumming isn’t new to you, especially when Toji’s mad. There’s an extra sense of passion involved.

As Toji slowly rose back up to your face, you notice how your slick glistens on his face. He looks so beautiful like this, you think. Immediately, his lips are on yours, the taste of yourself lingering on both your lips.

“See what you do to me? Hm?” He says in between kisses, “Take your ass to bed…”

However, something sparks inside you when he says that. You can’t just let him win. He’ll be a cocky bastard in the morning. You have to put him in his place.

You discreetly find a way to get on top of him mid make out, his hands gripping your sides. You felt every fibre of clothing on him, especially against your skin.

It irked you so badly, you wanted to feel his skin, his scars, his tattoos. Everything about him was everything you’ve ever dreamed for in a man.

“I want this off,” You whisper against his lips, tugging at his bottoms, “Now..”

He does as you say almost instantly, his thick cock springing out in the process. “You got hard from us arguing..?”

“As if you didn’t practically squirt in my mouth after we argued.”

Touché.

With one hand behind you, you aligned his hard cock to your pussy, slowly pushing it in. A satisfied moan escaped both of your lips, this was that feeling you both were yearning for.

All the sass, the arguments, the lying, name calling…you know why you stay with him, for moments like this.

Toji’s hips roll up into yours, hitting you exactly where you want it. You take his hand and put some of his fingers in your mouth, sucking them.

But then, you placed your hands on his shoulders and began to ride him feverishly. Toji was in awe of how energetic you were, and how the plush of your ass looked in the mirror behind.

“Shit, Y/N…”

“Can those bitches do it like me…?” You whisper in his ear.

“I don’t let them…this is all yours..” He whimpers back to you.

You smile knowing damn well you won.

[jazeswhbhaven]

A Christmas beneath Heaven P2 | React | Days 1 & 2

Woooo we've made it to the second part of the event ya'll! And just as I expected, this is already crazy within the first two days of content Let's do a little recap though, just in case ya'll are seeing this first hand and not the other posts I've made!

MC is down with what they call a 'christmas cold' in Hell. Solomon had it before as well. The symptoms with MC is in short, they can't stop masturbating or getting horny and it's pretty much draining the life out of them. The Kings meet and decide that they must cure her and with the help of Bael finding an old devil with some information the medicine is located in the Middle Realm that is guarded by the first fallen angel, Achazriel. Because they all can't infiltrate all at once, each King must go one at a time, but it's looking like it's more cumbersome than they expected.

Now that you get the general idea without the extra stuff let's continue- S u M m A r Yyyyy~

The first King to make an attempt to infilitrate the Middle Realm is Belphegor. The problem though, is that everyone, including Belphie himself all turn to Beleth who's confused as fuck until he realizes, he's the one that must go in his King's stead.

When I say, that nobody had his back on this, not even Belphie I mean it. Beleth though says that it shouldn't take him long and he'd be okay.

I find it funny though that it was brought up that it's kinda messed up to send a fallen angel back to deal with other fallen angels and everyone's like ????!!! WAIT as if they didn't realize that.

But then we have Bael, sweet bby worried about Beleth and I have a small ramble about that. Not only are they neighboring countries, but the two of them are literally twins in the sense of they both babysit their King, and pretty much run things for their respective countries. So he has sympathy for him in that regard.

Beel doesn't really care though, saying that everyone should place bets for how long it will take Beleth before he comes back. Bimet is doing the math in his head, Asmodeus guessed it...they have this odd moment...

That odd moment being that Bimet was curious as to what made Asmodeus agree with him that 2 days would be the max and Asmo teases him into saying that he can't possibly believe he'd give away information without 'something' in return and Bimet is just kinda like 'oop. my bad... 😶' when Asmo's like...'these devils not giving me bussy is cruel' (not really but he's probably thinking that)

And well, everyone puts their bets in other than Leviathan and Lucifer because they find it pointless. Lucifer honestly just chooses to not engage due to "professionalism" (lmaooo) Belphie even randomly wakes up and is like "yah 3 days is my bet" and goes back to sleep, Bimet changes his bet too. Like good lord everyone believe in my bby pls.

Well...and just as Asmodeus (and Bimet but sadly he changed his number) guessed it...Beleth is back in two days and the poor babes is beat up badly. But at least Asmo agrees to share the winnings with Beleth (he has a thing for him I swear)

I'll spare you the theatrics of how they tried guessing what happened to him, but there was joke that he was fighting Harumon, which wasn't the issue. The issue is that Beleth was paranoid of the traps set, transformed into his cat self, and well...did a cat thing and got trapped anyway because his size triggered them all at the same time. (Let me add that Lucifer was able to tell what injuries Beleth had just by looking at him and what the cause was a "catfight" is what he called it)

The kings are all laughing at him (aside from Lucifer and Levi) like even Belphie is poking at him and I'm just like??? Leave him alone ????? So what he was a clumsy kitty, cats do dumb shit all the time here on Earth 💀🥺😭 I'd pet him and tell him he's a good kitty.

Levi however, is only upset because he came back with just the info of "there are traps" but nothing else. I think Beleth tried his best, he was just.....not on his A-game sadly.

So the next devil to go is Mammon. He just straight up grabs the dice, rolls it and his number comes up. And with no surprise, he gets through the traps so easily it's second nature to him and his giant hands. But the timeline for traveling through all the traps was half a day compared to Beleth getting beat up for two days. 😭

Now, he DOES make it all to the way the gate, Mammon interested in the door and it's materials, and then it opens on it's own so now he's like OOOO NEW TECH MINE. (one track mind...)

So he walks in, and it looks really pretty btw...I'd probably sleep there and he sees the first fallen (hot asf) angel Achazriel. So it appears that this fallen angel is for the most part docile and just kinda sits on the chair he's in. Though, he does know who Mammon is, though very little is known about him.

He doesn't even want to fight, he challenges Mammon by asking him one question, if he answers it within 10 seconds he won't have to leave. In the Middle Realm, his word is law, so if he loses Mammon will be forced out by that rule.

Guess what the question was? "Who is most precious to you." I was like OH this is easy, MC! Well....our uh big stud here went through all of ten seconds thinking of other things and people even the souls in his body before he realized it was MC that was the answer but it was too late 😒🙃😭😭 Like??? Okay Mammon thanks love you too. Because the point of the entire trip was to heal MC and I'm like??? W T F. Satan could have answered that question easily I bet (he seems to be the OTP Kings wise)

So...Mammon failed, but at least he had more information. He didn't tell them the question that was asked, which I assumed no one asked him directly so he had no reason to reveal. (I bet you Satan would have laughed at him for getting it wrong and be like HA the answer is MC you idiot. or something like that)

Beel is up next! And well...since Mammon did all the footwork, he basically just had to walk up there, meet Achzariel and was straight up like "Give me the medicine." Beel....pls.....

PHEW so this summary was longer than the others because yeah so far Part Two's stories are far longer than Part One's! When I do the screenshots hopefully everything fits in this post. Some may have to be exlcuded ;w;

Let's get to the screencapssssss

idk i found this cute because no Satan you can't do that. Time out chair again.

I feel like this is Luci's polite way of saying..."I ain't got the time nor patience for this foolishness"

Beel. LMAO really now? (this was toward Beleth going first and Belphie was like "I ain't" and went to sleep.) Bael was like.....o k.

He's so worried, let me give him kisses for being a sweetie.

NABE DOG FORM CAMEO (gives him treats and scritches)

AYo??????? We just gon' fap in front of everyone present? ASMO ??

Leviathan was ready to beat his ass like

Like srsly he was done at this point lmaooooo

😭MY BABY OMG

I'm sorry Levi has been irritated this entire event and I'm crying because it's either Beel or Asmodeus annoying the fuck out of him. 💀

They were so mean 😭 like I know they were just joking but this man came back battered and torn being called a rag by Asmo and now they're calling him a clumsy cat. It's okay Beleth com'mere and and I'll give you hugs and smooches. (He seems to not be too graceful as a big kitty and that's okay)

Tryna capitalize on strange self opening doors, okay Mammon

Bye, taking a nap here.

I know you fine as fuck, wait who said that? I'm supposed to be napping

what do you mean, what????

ok.

Pretty much. LOL

And just because there's room to throw this in....

He really said, "you goin' fam." and went back to sleep.

Classic Leviathan roasting.

LIKE ya'll there's so much interactions between the Kings and their nobles in this event, it's really nice to see them acting in their natural state without MC around even if they are simply just in a quarantine room jackin' off to the thoughts of Minhyeok.

Since Beel boldly just went up in Middle Realm and asked for the medicine directly I wonder how that's gonna work out for him...I can't imagine too well since he's...ya know himself lmao

[redroses07]

How The Evans Would React To Reader Who Has Panic Attacks

A/N: Hi guys!! This is just what I headcanon Evan's characters to be like with a partner who has panic attacks. As someone who deals with panic attacks personally, this hits really close to home. I hope y'all enjoy, and comments are always appreciated.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆₊˚⊹♡ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆₊˚⊹♡

Tate Langdon

Has experienced panic himself, so is surprisingly good at handling them.

Will hold you as close as possible until it passes.

Lets you cry into his chest and sometimes even sheds a few tears himself.

Combs his fingers through your hair and presses soft kisses to your forehead.

He's mostly quiet during them considering he's not the best with his words, and mostly relies on his physical presence to comfort you.

Tate hates seeing you like this, so he always pushes you to have a conversation about what triggered the attack once you're calm.

Tate obviously isn't a mental health expert, but he wants to help you to the best of his ability.

Kit Walker

The SWEETEST boy oh my lord.

Kit will immediately drop whatever he's doing and rush to be by your side.

He takes both of your hands in his, and pulls you into him.

"Look at me, sweetheart. You'll get through this."

Is super vocal, and his words always help calm you.

Will kiss your tears away until you don't have anymore to shed.

"I love you hon, it's gonna be okay."

Once you've calmed down some, he'll carry you to bed so you can rest.

Listens to your every request and does whatever in order to make you feel comfortable.

Also makes sure that he knows your triggers so he can help minimize your attacks.

Kit is the king of communication, and your relationship is built on honesty and transparency.

Pre-Death Kyle Spencer

Also extremely sweet and loving.

I'm a firm believer that Kyle is an amazing listener so over time he becomes very well equipped to help you.

"Hey babe are you okay?"

"Oh shit!" He immediately pulls you into him.

Will sway back and forth as he holds you to help soothe you.

Also I think he would have a habit of humming softly in your ear, whether it's consciously or not.

Jimmy Darling

I know for a fact that Jimmy is a big hugger, so his first instinct is to give you a big hug.

He doesn't have much experience with panic attacks, but I'm sure my queen Ethel taught him how to be empathetic.

I feel like he would sing to you to calm you down, doing what he does best yk?

I think he'd be a super anxious boyfriend, so he'll constantly check in on you for the next few days to make sure you're okay.

"Hey, how're ya feeling?"

"Jimmy, I told you I'm okay."

"I know, I know, I just want to be extra sure."

James March

I feel like he'd lowkey be super confused, especially the first time you had an around him.

Given the fact that he's over 100 years old he doesn't even know what a panic attack is.

I feel like he would think you were being possessed at first and freak out.

Once he does understand though, he'd actually be very loving.

For one thing, if James happens to fall in love with you then he is IN LOVE.

He would devote his life to you and nothing about you could deter him from loving you.

The main thing he'll do to comfort you is kiss you everywhere.

Like he will kiss your cheeks, your shoulders, your nose, your lips. Not in a sexual way, but in an affectionate way.

Kai Anderson

I think he'd be super super awkward about it.

Like I can honestly imagine him giving you a pat on the shoulder and being like "get it together."

On the other hand, if he's in a good mood, he'd start talking about how once he takes control of the country you won't have to deal with anything like that anymore.

If he's feeling extra generous he'll even hold your hand to help you relax.

Kai is your typical narcissist so he would deal with your panic attacks in the only way that he knows how, making it about himself.

But you know that's just how he is, and that he shows his affection in his own way.

[gnomewithalaptop]

Transcendence AU Dash Simulator GO!!!

31 notes

🌟 lesbianstellaconifer Follow

okay but actually block me if you ship mizcor -- 'hurr durr but we age stella up' -- SHUT UPPP she's literally a minor and alcor's canonically over a million years old so how about you stop being a freak

🎩 woodsmans-left-nipple Follow

Babe I hate to break this to you but Mizcor's literally one of the most famous relationships in all of post-transcendental literature

🌟 lesbianstellaconifer Follow

I could not have more obviously been talking about Mizar the Magnificent but you know what? Yeah classic Mizcor supporters can fuck off too actually.

Everybody likes to whip out Twin Souls like some kind of gotcha but have you even actually read it??? Like it's literally supporting demon worship and pedophilia -- both of which are EXTREMELY ILLEGAL btw. So yeah if I see any of my followers reblogging that shit I'm reporting you to the Occult Defense Agency idc if we're mutuals

🐟 demonologyturnedmegay Follow

*looks at my Alcorian Literature PhD* guess we better stock up on prison shivs buddy

🍃 haveyouseenmylibrary Follow

okay I'm sorry but

and Mizar the Magnificent isn't????

5k notes

📷 nature-pics-daily

Los Angeles 🏝️

#sunken city of los angeles #new california #travel #ocean #photography #lmao i almost got eaten by a kelpie trying to take this pic pls reblog it

98 notes

🧁 definitely-mizar Follow

Hey guys! Just wanted to let you know that The Scepter of Vanquished Souls, the newest book in the Wanderlust Trilogy, is now available for pre order on Glamazon!

Purchasers of the hard-cover edition will also receive never-before-seen content, including a deleted scene between Princess Samia and the Shadow King!

🤷‍♂️ not-not-ian-beale Follow

Boosting because I honestly cannot recommend this book enough. Truly one of Mira's best (and I'm not just saying that because she married me!)

25k notes

⚠️ alv Follow

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

You are the 6 billionth user to log into Jumblr today!! This means you are eligible to win a FREE WACBOOK PRO!!!! Click here to claim your prize and win BIG BIG REWARDS!!

#twin souls #mizar #alcor #mizcor #twin souls: reawakened #twin souls: breaking circles #twin souls: newest moon #twinner #twincon3015 #not a scam

Based on your likes!

0 notes

🌞 azarath-metrion-zinthirst Follow

So. I had a day.

📖 stanley-pines-memorial-library Follow

Okay, but consider

🌞 azarath-metrion-zinthirst Follow

I don't remember my older brother's wedding

📖 stanley-pines-memorial-library Follow

A small price to pay for no middle school trauma

🐧 selkiebael Follow

Okay so I just read the url and--

Asfdksfjk go off you funky lil intern

📖 stanley-pines-memorial-library Follow

I'm actually the senior librarian. But thanks!

🐈 alcorphabetical Follow

Posts that have 10k notes. To me

15k notes

🔮 demonoftheday Follow

Today's demon of the day is Nxlar the Antithetical! Responsible for the Florida Springs Massacre of 3007, the body count for this purveyor of madness is estimated to be over 400 (source).

🐸 that-one-half-elf-bitch

I could fix her

41 notes

🍑 lookingformygnomequeen Follow

literally screaming crying throwing up rn I've turned off 'Based on your likes' like eight times @staff can't you just get rid of him already

2.5k notes

🎤 rosaslittleredboots Follow

#i accidentally set my alchemy textbook on fire today and i don't even care AAAAAA this is going to be amazing #northwest mansion mystery #pacifica northwest #rosa darling #im about to be so insufferable about this just you wait

616 notes

👹 sexiestdemon3015bracket Follow

🐸 that-one-half-elf-bitch

Nxlar SWEEEEEP!!!

#if you love me at all you'll vote for my lady love #LISTEN i could bring her to the light i nkow i could

37 notes

👻 sweetthingsaremadeofdeeznuts

Lmao so Nxlar the Antithetical totally turned my apartment complex into a pile of sentient sludge yesterday. I'm fine -- I was at work when it all went down, but uh... yeah, my situation obviously just became super not-great. I hate to ask, but I don't get paid til the 15th, so if some of y'all could float me some cash just so I can get a motel room for a couple nights, I'll fr owe you a life debt

Goal: 0/250

FundFriend

LenMo

#fuck demons fr #like seriously what'd i ever do to them 😭😭😭 #mutual aid #pls boost #don't tag as donation

17 notes

🏳️‍⚧️ gliesssse Follow

Important PSA

So idk if y'all have been reading the news lately, but the alcor virus has been making the rounds on the interwebs again. I feel like I shouldn't have to say this but PLEASE don't click any random links rn, ESPECIALLY if they're tagged with twin souls.

I know we twinners love to joke about it, but the alcor virus is legitimately dangerous and has been known to seriously ruin people's lives. Idk. Just like be smart and practice basic caution I guess? Jumblr's pretty much dead these days, so he might skip over us, but it's always better to be safe than sorry

⚠️ alv Follow

This is a good point! It is always better to be safe than sorry! That's why if you're smart, you'll click here for a list of ways to virus-proof your computer. Stay safe out there everybody!

Based on your likes!

4k notes

🌲 discogirl99 Follow

Anyone else just randomly crave connective tissue sometimes

🧁 sparkle-glitter-sideblog

no actually i think that might just be a you thing

#also i heard screaming on the other line when i called you earlier there better not be a mess when i get home #beloved demon brother tag

2 notes

👑 sameeya

Okay guys I might be crazy but what if the Shadow King was actually telling the truth when he said Princess Samia's brother is still alive??? Like, if you think about it, there's a tonnnn of foreshadowing in Crown of Ghosts and the author tweeted that there was gonna be a surprise twist in the new book sooo 👀👀

#i've connected the dots -- YOU DIDN'T CONNECT SHIT -- i've connected them #wanderlust trilogy #mira ramachandran #crown of ghosts #scepter of vanquished souls #princess samia #samia of cleves #shadow king #ahmed of cleves #bookblr

25 notes

🪨 professionalnatural-deactivated30141227

Reminder that you are beautiful exactly as you are and there are thousands who would sell their souls to imitate what you do naturally <3

👠 mizarsfrillypetticoat Follow

I actually really needed this today 💗

🦇 plsbytemevladdyzaddy Follow

Yo quit reblogging this op is a blatant human supremacist

🪨 professionalnatural-deactivated30141227

And? No one cares lmao

⚠️ alv Follow

Enjoy deactivation. Lmao.

🪓 wenda-was-a-lesbian-confirmed Follow

🕵🏻‍♂️ alcor-in-the-tardis Follow

#I sent screenshots of that one centaur post to her boss too #give you two guesses what species his wife is (tags by @alv)

Holy shit. Am I actually rooting for the alcor virus rn?

🍄 warioxreader Follow

maybe the real virus was the friends we made along the way <3

⚠️ alv Follow

No, the real virus is me. Don't take credit for my accomplishments.

🐲 retiredbus Follow

Heritage post

62k notes

🐔 old-friends-senior-griffin-sanctuary Follow

I just want to get dicked down again =/

[jimblejamblewritings]

starlight moonlight sunlight — blurb one

Series Summary: Remus has a choice to make: his new boyfriend Sirius or his recently no longer ex girlfriend, Y/N. But when Y/N's world begins crumbling, Remus wants to be there for her. So he makes a decision... Continue dating his boyfriend behind his girlfriend's back.

Blurb Title: Reconnecting on the Train

Pairing: ex!Remus x reader, Remus x Sirius, eventual poly!Wolfstar x reader

Warnings: none

blurb series navigation here

1. Reconnecting on the Train

You sat up as the train pulled into King’s Cross Station. This school year was going to be good, hopefully. You had already taken your NEWTs last year because what else did you have to do in a safehouse but study? So all you had to do was relax this year. You looked out the window, coming face to face with a very tall, plus size redhead and next to her, an equally tall blonde with a bob. They did charades to try and ask if anyone else was in your compartment or the one right next to yours. You weren’t even finished shaking your head before they booked it.

They breathed out sighs of relief as they plopped down on the seats before disappearing the wall between the two compartments so you were one big room. The train benches were arranged to be in a square formation with an opening for the door. 

The blonde with the spiky bob stuck out a hand. “Marlene McKinnon. 7th year.” 

“Y/N L/N. 7th year also.” 

A gasp echoed out. On the other side of James, Sirius froze up. His hand held on tighter to the taller boy next to him. He brought Remus’ hand to his lips, kissing it gently. How dare you show up here of all places? He was the main one to spend countless nights comforting the man when you left him. He had been the one to help put everything back together again and you were coming back to ruin it. 

You felt the train bench shake a little bit as one of the boys on the bench with golden brown hai— “Remus?” 

“Y/N?” 

James went wide-eyed. “Wait, that Y/N…” 

You both dug through your bags, pulling out polaroids sent years ago. Remus had to be sure. You held them up to each other’s faces for comparison. He looked different in only a year. The two of you were definitely the same people in your photos though. You were confused when his expression hardened at confirming it was you. 

“What are you doing here? You stopped writing. For months.” 

“I’m so sorry, babe.” 

Sirius laughed from behind Remus. “That’s it. I’m sorry?”  

You blinked twice, a bit taken aback by the hostility from his friends. “I’ve been a bit busy.” 

“Busy? So the rest of us just don’t have jack shit in our lives?” 

Fiddling with your hands a bit, you sighed. “Remus, can I talk to you alone?” 

“I’m sorry but until I get answers, you have to understand that it’s a little hard for me to just go anywhere with you.” 

“I’m a refugee. The MACUSA sent every new-maj into hiding because of Voldemort. Our schools grabbed us and our families in the middle of the night. We weren’t allowed to contact anyone outside. My family was rushed here because they got attacked. I’ve been separated from everyone else for their safety.” 

“Y/N, are you okay? Are they okay?” Remus’ face softened. 

His chest tightened as you shook your head. Honestly, you’d been putting on a brave face, telling him as much. You wanted to be a rock and a calming presence for your family during this time. And over the months, you’ve made peace with everything that’s happened. You understand it but you don’t feel like you’ve had a chance to be emotional about it. Remus jumped to his feet and pulled you into a hug when the tears started to fall. He rested his head against yours and rocked you back and forth. 

“I wanted to write to you. I’m sorry.”

“Shhh, it’s alright.” 

“I only found out two weeks ago that the UK was taking us in so I just decided to surprise you.” 

“I’m sorry I didn’t realize it was that bad. Your letters before never…” 

“I know. I tried to keep everything positive for you. I’m sorry if I made you worried.” 

“Stop apologizing. It’s alright. You’re here now. Safe… Y/N, do you want to go to the observation car, calm down a little? No one’s really in there, I promise. I’ll come get you in a moment, okay?” 

You smiled. That’s what you loved about your boyfriend. He was understanding and patient about the lack of letters. You nodded and handed him your stuff. He pointed out the observation car and waited for you to leave his sight before closing the carriage door. 

Remus groaned. “I’m such a shit boyfriend.” 

Sirius adamantly shook his head, offended that he would dare suggest that. “You didn’t know. I can’t believe she still thinks you’d be together after she left without a word.” 

“Sirius.” 

“He’s kind of right,” Regulus spoke up. “If I had disappeared for months, how could I possibly expect my partner to not move on?” 

“She’s just not like that. We’ve talked about her friends’ relationships before.” 

“That seems selfish.” 

A lot of the train agreed.

Peter opened up his can of Fizzing Whizbee. “Just break up with her… again.” 

“I can’t.” 

“Why? Do you still love her?” 

“No,” Remus answered without hesitation. “Feelings are long gone.” 

“Then why not?” 

“Y/N is fragile right now. Our relationship is her only stability. I feel like if I break up with her right now, it’ll shatter her.” 

“I’m not leaving you,” Sirius said. “I know we haven’t announced ourselves to the school yet but this relationship means something to me. This might sound awful but I don’t care. I don’t care what she’s been through enough to leave you. I had to pick up your heart when she wasn’t there. She can’t just take you from me.” 

“I don’t want to leave you either… Just let me make sure she’s on her feet then we’ll be over. Okay, love?” 

“How long?” 

“When we start the second semester? Is that okay with you?” 

Sirius thought about it for a considerable time. “Fine. Nothing can stop me from kissing you in broom closets, though.” 

Mary put away her crossword puzzles to grab a book instead. “You do know that she’ll want to be our friend, right?” 

Remus nodded. “I’m not saying to not be friends with her. She’ll fit right in here, I know it. I’d like to be friends with her if we can split amicably. Just don’t tell her about Sirius and I, let us break up naturally.” 

“Can do.” 

“Thank you… Love, do you have any rules for me?” 

Sirius thought for a moment. “Can you try not to be intimate with her? Just never initiate it. Kisses are fine, I expect that. You can even flirt. I won’t think anything of it. It’ll be like you and Lily or Mary. But no large gestures. And no calling her love or starshine or sweetheart. Those are my pet names, she’ll have to find her own.”  

The rest of the train ride wasn’t sat in uncomfortable silence but social conversation. You put your headphones back in and pulled out the crochet project you were working on. Your boyfriend looked over at you, tapping your ankle incessantly until you finally looked up and took out your earbuds. 

“Yeah, babe?” 

“Do you want anything from the trolley?” 

“Um, no, I’m good. I’m on a tight budget for now. I’ll just get another water.” You looked down in betrayal when your stomach grumbled.

“Here.” Sirius handed you a to-go bowl filled to the brim with salad. He gave Remus a sandwich filled with basically just meat. A favorite near the full moon. 

“Thank you,” you said with such kindness that he wanted to roll his eyes. You leaned into your boyfriend to exaggerate a whisper. “Your friends are really nice.” 

The train finally stopped at the Hogsmeade Station. You were beginning to buzz with excitement as you sat under the Sorting Hat. Your uniform changed from gray and white to splashes of red and gold as you made your way to a clapping table. A note plopped into your lap halfway through late lunch/early dinner. 

Back to School Party: 1st-4th year in Gryffindor Common Room. 5th-7th in Slytherin. 

When dinner ended, you didn’t want to follow the first years so you went with your train buddies that were in Gryffindor, trusting that you’d eventually find your room.  

“Oh.” 

Marlene and Mary turned to you. “What is it?” 

“My key has the number eleven on it too.” 

The girls ushered you into their, now your, dorm room. The other girls looked at each other as you unpacked in less than fifteen minutes. It was kind of sad and brought them to the reality that while they were worried about Voldemort and war, some people were already living it. 

You sat down on your bed. “So, what do you normally wear for parties?” 

“I don’t know about Ilvermorny but it’s about dressing hot.” 

You looked at your wardrobe. “How long do I have?”

| next blurb here |

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PERMANENT TAGLIST:

@venomsvl @peaches-n-sunscreen @summerellaz @supernaturallover2002 @sambucky8 @9daykrisr @thebitchinleo @23victoria @scarlets-widow @pagetpagetpagetpaget @lovexnatasha @awesomebooklover17 @1234-angelika @imatrisk @blackreaderatrisk @princess-jules47 @alexloveskili @a-marie-a @siriuslysirius1107​ @i-have-no-life-charlie

[rems-writing]

The rulers of Spades

Pairing: JongJoong × Lost Girl!reader (mainly Jongho × reader since there's SeongJoong in this fic)

Summary: After your time with the Hearts, you face the most terrifying suit. But were they really terrifying as people say?

Warning(s): Choking (both sexual and non-sexual), slight mention of violence, mention of a murder (it's not what you think actually lol), Jongho being a damn flirt, top!Seonghwa × bottom!Hongjoong, mentions of a size kink, drunk sex (both parties consented), pussydrunk!Jongho, finger sucking, riding with a bit of guidance, cumming inside (DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU! WRAP IT BEFORE YOU TAP IT!)

Genre: Nasty smut with a bit of plot

Nets: @blossomnet @mirohs-aurora-society

I'm also tagging @ja3hwa since we were competing in who can write the filthiest Jongho smut [we weren't actually competing lol I love them too much for that]

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

“Let’s go visit the Spades next.” 

Mingi choked and spat out his coffee, Wooyoung shrieked in fear and fainted dramatically in Yeosang’s arms, Yeosang rolled his eyes at the sight of his best friend fainting as he caught him, and Seonghwa had a concerned look on his face. A pained smile was on the queen’s face as he caressed your face gently. “Are you sure, Y/N? I know I said that the King of Spades is relatively a nice guy, but I’m almost certain that he’ll go mad. The news of your arrival and how you were treated in Neverland travels fast. We can always visit them last.” 

You shook your head at his statement. “If you claim that the King of Spades and the Jack of Spades are nice people, then we should visit them next. That way, I won’t dread seeing them and instead can relax when we visit the rulers of Clubs straight after.” 

Mingi tilted his head in awe as you spoke bravely and confidently about the rulers of Spades, Wooyoung was fanning himself and seemed impressed as he listened, Yeosang had a bright grin on his face, and Seonghwa sighed softly before nodding. He kissed your forehead and hugged you. “Alright. I will take your word for it. Mingi! Get the carriage! Yeosang, Y/N, and I will head straight to the Spades castle now.”

Mingi nodded and ordered some card soldiers to fetch the carriage and guard the trio as they stepped outside of the castle. Once they were all outside, the carriage arrived and Seonghwa & Yeosang stepped inside first. Mingi held you back and had you face him. A hint of worry was in his eyes as he gazed over your face. 

“Babe, listen. You don’t know the King and Jack of Spades like I do. Like Seonghwa said. They’re nice. However, their anger is anything but pleasant. I implore you. Be wary and be careful.”

“Do they honestly get angry easily?”

“No no. It’s nothing like that. It’s more of the fact that… uh… they want to destroy Neverland just as much as I do, but they’re a lot more violent about it than me. The King of Spades once had an older brother and the Jack of Spades once had a younger brother. They were both lured by Peter Pan and were killed by his hand… in the most brutal way possible. The King and the Jack were so enraged that they sent the deadliest creature to burn down the island.” 

Mingi leaned closer to whisper in your ear.  “The Jabberwocky.” 

An apprehensive feeling washed over you and you suddenly regret saying that you wanted to visit the Spades next. Sensing your apprehension, Mingi kissed you quickly and caressed your face in a gentle and loving manner. “This doesn’t mean that they’ll kill you on the spot though! They understand more than anyone how suffering is in Neverland. They will protect you with their utmost might. Just… don’t get in the way when they unleash their anger. The last thing they need is to sob in regret over hurting an innocent girl due to their bloodlust.” 

With his reassurance, you nodded and put on a brave face before bidding goodbye to Mingi and Wooyoung. Being the affectionate little shit that he is, Wooyoung whined and held you close to him so you wouldn’t go. You giggled and playfully scolded him to which he whined some more. He even pouted! You pinched his cheek lightly and reassured him that you’ll be fine. Emitting one last whine, he reluctantly let you go. After entering the carriage, you waved goodbye to Mingi and Wooyoung. The carriage soon made its way to the Spades castle. You were sitting with Yeosang this time and you yawned as you laid your head on his lap. Yeosang smiled and patted your head.  “It’ll take a while for us to get there. Get some sleep, Y/N.” His soft and deep voice lulled you into a short nap. One that he would unfortunately have to wake you up from later once they arrived. 

—-------------------------------------------------

The cries from a murder of crows woke you instantly and Yeosang had to hold you down so you wouldn’t hit your head against the carriage ceiling. The carriage was pretty small after all. “We’ve arrived. Stick close to us.” You nodded and stuck close to Yeosang as the three of you exited the carriage and made your way to the Spades castle. 

While the Diamonds castle depicted a millionaire’s house and the Hearts castle was a lot more lively, filled with heart shaped bushes and enthusiastic chatter, the Spades castle personified death itself. 

A dark moat surrounded the castle, dead trees were planted throughout the yard, crows either flocked around or tried to rip out your hair, and you swore that even the gardeners tending to the black rosebeds narrowed their eyes at you in suspicion. One glare from Seonghwa and the gardeners minded their business. Of course, this didn’t stop the other patrons milling about the Spades castle from crowding him, you, and Yeosang. The anxiety of the people surrounding you was rising, especially since the patrons prodded at you with questions that definitely made you uncomfortable. You received questions that ranged from accusations of being a spy to being a concubine for Seonghwa and Yeosang. You felt tears swell up in your eyes and you were about to ask Yeosang to get them to stop when a powerful voice rang out in the crumbling stone building that was the inside of the Spades castle. 

“UNLESS YOU DON’T VALUE YOUR HEAD, I SUGGEST YOU LEAVE OUR VISITORS ALONE!” 

The patrons soon quieted down and dispersed like a school of fish before going back to their business. You sniffled and Yeosang hushed you in a comforting way while Seonghwa walked forward a bit before smiling lightly and bowing. 

“It’s good to know that you still have power over your insolent subjects, Jongho.”

You looked up and saw a man wearing an all black leather outfit. His intense eyes, that were brown with slight caramel undertones and had spade outlines in his irises, softened at the sight of Seonghwa speaking. His stone cold resolve melted and a bright gummy smile was on his face as he walked down from his throne and towards Seonghwa before bringing him into a warm bear hug. He then walked over to Yeosang and hugged him as well before shifting over to face you. 

“Are you going to introduce yourself or shall I call you ‘cutie’? Because you certainly are one.”

A blush spread across your cheeks and you hid your face in Yeosang’s chest. A soft giggle could be heard from behind this Jongho guy and Jongho stepped aside to reveal a short man. He wore a simple black suit & tie and his blonde hair was tied back. His bright orange eyes stared intensely at you before smiling and extending his hand. You looked up at him shyly and relaxed as you looked at his pretty smile. 

“I’m the King of Spades, but you can call me Hongjoong. If you didn’t know who Jongho is by now, he’s the mighty Jack of Spades.” 

As you took his hand in yours and shook it, you felt it being lifted and blushed even more when Hongjoong pressed his lips against your knuckles. Jongho gingerly took your hand and kissed it too. 

“Are you the Lost Girl?” He asked you. You nodded hesitantly and Hongjoong nodded before leaning in to whisper in your ear.  

“Do I scare you, pretty girl?” 

You didn’t know what to say. Luckily, you didn’t have to since Seonghwa spoke for you.

“Now now, my love. Don’t intimidate her like that. She’s been through a lot.” He said lovingly and you watched as Hongjoong giggled before grabbing Seonghwa’s hand, spinning him around, and dipping him slightly. You grew confused since you didn’t want to assume anything. Yeosang sensed your confusion and patted your head gently. 

“Yes, Y/N. The King of Spades and the Queen of Diamonds are together. Who would’ve thought huh?” 

As you saw the two men giggle in each other’s presence and share a loving kiss, your heart melted at the sight. These two definitely belonged together. They reminded you of Snow White and Charming in a way. You felt strong hands grab your waist and pull you towards a strong and sturdy body. You looked up slightly to see Jongho smirking down at you. 

“That can be us. If you want, of course.” 

The thought of having this big man beside you 24/7? You definitely weren’t going to complain about that. Despite him being young, he held such maturity and power. Like a true Jack of Spades would. You also felt oddly relaxed in his presence and found yourself leaning against him. 

“Come now. The five of us have much to discuss. And take your time as you explain.”

—-------------------------------------------------

The five of you were soon in a meeting room and you explained slowly and shyly your experiences being on Neverland. As you spoke, you saw Hongjoong and Jongho growing more angry with each word that came out of your mouth. But it wasn’t anger towards you.  It was anger towards Peter Pan. 

After you finished speaking, you felt yourself being lifted up and placed onto someone’s lap. The sturdy thighs underneath you felt firm to the touch and you trailed your eyes up to see Jongho, who was busy placing light kisses along your neck in a soothing manner. The sudden affection threw you off yet you weren’t complaining. “Don’t worry, Y/N. We’ll protect you.” 

You giggled and kissed one of his round cheeks, to which he blushed at while the other three men giggled like a gaggle of gossiping schoolgirls. Hongjoong stood up and stretched before helping Seonghwa up. “I suggest you all stay here for the night. Creatures lurk about during this time. Dangerous creatues. You can leave first thing in the morning.” 

Seonghwa agreed immediately and you & Yeosang shared a look, agreeing that the queen himself was the reason why Hongjoong wanted everyone to stay. Could you blame them? No, not really. After Hongjoong ordered his card soldiers to prepare rooms for tonight, he whisked Seonghwa away. Yeosang sighed tiredly and got up as well.

“Goodnight to you both. I’ll see you in the morning.” 

With that, you & Jongho were the only ones left in the meeting room. As you stood there awkwardly, you felt your head be lifted up and you stared into his eyes. 

“Shall we go to my chambers and retire for the night? Or do you want to have some fun?”

You thought for a moment before choosing to stay up late. A smirk was on his face and he kissed your cheek before taking your hand and leading you into his room. 

—-------------------------------------------------

Several glasses of cherry wine later, you found yourself straddling the young man on his couch as you made out with him fiercely and desperately near the fireplace. Jongho was matching your intensity by gripping your hips tightly and moving them back and forth so you could grind against him. You felt his bulge underneath you and you moaned slightly as Jongho’s hands wandered to your ass and squeezed both cheeks lightly. 

“You’re so pretty. I’m jealous that Mingi got to you first. But don’t worry. I’ll fuck you better.”

You giggled at his confident words while he lifted you up and wrapped your legs around his waist before striding over to the bed and throwing you down on top of it gently. As he kissed you with fervor and a lot of tongue, you felt his hands glide up and down your body. His palms were tracing out every curve while he moved his head down to leave love bites all over your neck. Your hands dug into his red hair and tugged at the strands, which released a groan from him. He soon lifted his head and smirked down at you before snapping his fingers. You felt cold instantly and looked down to see that your dress had disappeared. 

Did this dude have magic?! 

Jongho drank in your naked form and crawled on top of you once more before kissing you passionately. He tapped his shoulder and his clothes disappeared as well, leaving him bare. You internally drooled at the sight of his big body hovering over you, his honey like skin glowing in the dim light of the fire blazing in the firepit. You soon saw him move down and spread your legs open before kissing your clit lightly. 

“I wonder if you taste just as good as you look. Time to find out.” 

You mewled loudly as he dove face first into your pussy, lapping up every single inch of wetness that was dripping from your hole. Unlike Mingi, Jongho was apparently a messy eater when it came to giving head. You came quickly but he wasn’t done yet. He wanted to elicit as many orgasms from you as much as possible, which led to you crying due to overstimulation. He cooed softly and reassured you that you’re fine. He then wrapped his hand around your throat and squeezed slightly. 

“Will you be a good girl and take what I give you? Or be a bad girl and have me punish you by fucking you into the wall over there?” 

The only word you could utter out was ‘good’ since his strong hand cut off your airway yet not entirely. Jongho smirked in satisfaction and lifted his hand before shoving his fingers into your mouth. You sucked on them happily and Jongho groaned quietly at the sight, afraid he might cum if he kept looking at you. He pulled his fingers out of your mouth and shoved straight into your wet cunt before continuing to eat you out. After your 10th orgasm, he lifted his head and wiped his chin before smashing his lips onto yours. His fingers scissored you open while you sucked on his tongue. After he finished prepping you, he grabbed your hips and flipped the both of you over so you were straddling him once more. Your swollen clit rubbed against his thick shaft and you both groaned when you lifted your hips and sank down onto his cock. 

“You think you can move, Y/N?”

“I can, but it’s just… I’ve never ridden someone before. Not even Mingi.” 

“That’s ok, cutie. I’ll guide you.” 

Jongho grabbed your hips and lifted you up and down slowly onto his cock, setting a pace for you so you can get used to him. After a few minutes, you guided his hands over to your breasts while your hands settled on his shoulders. You soon started bouncing on your own and Jongho threw his head back when you picked up the pace a bit. He was softly praising you and that fueled you to go even faster. Your moans grew louder and louder and brought him closer to you so he could tuck his head into the crook of your head while your arms wrapped around his head to keep him there. His own arms wrapped around your waist and kept you close to him as his dirty words entered your ear. 

“Be my queen. Be my Queen of Spades. I’ll protect you. I’ll care for you. I’ll destroy Neverland for you. I’ll kill Peter Pan myself. Fuck, let me cum inside you. Can I do that? Can I cum in you? Please?

“YES YES YOU CAN CUM IN ME, JONGHO! OH FUCK! I’M SO CLOSE! JONGHO, PLEASE!” 

You sank down firmly on his cock and creamed all over it while he came inside you. You both moaned quietly as you came down from your highs. Once you two were finished, he pulled out and lifted you up before carrying you to the bathroom. He set you down on the counter and waved his hand over the empty tub that soon filled with warm water and was surrounded by black rose petals, small white candles, and a fragrant smell permeating the air. The scent consisted of pinewood and jasmine. He soon lifted you from the counter and placed you in the warm water before entering behind you. 

“Go to sleep, my darling girl. I’ll wake you up, dry you off, and carry you to bed once the water turns cold.” 

You nodded and drifted off to sleep. 

—-------------------------------------------------

The next morning, the five of you were eating breakfast. You sat on Jongho’s lap, clad in nothing but one of his dress shirts and a new pair of panties that the Jack conjured up for you. You were expecting Seonghwa to be in your position as well. 

Imagine the surprise on your face when Hongjoong was the one clad in a dress shirt and tiny boxers and sat on Seonghwa’s lap instead. 

After you finished your breakfast, Jongho took you back to his room and helped you dress up. Instead of the red bodycon dress that you came in, you wore a fitted black pinstripe suit. In lieu of a dress shirt underneath the blazer, you wore a black corset top. The red flats that you wore underneath your old dress were replaced with black three-inch heels. You stil decided on no makeup and your hair was styled into two braids rather than leaving it down. You looked a bit more sophisticated and the suit was courtesy of Hongjoong, who had a knack for good fashion sense. Once you were all dressed up and ready to go, you exited his room and met up with the rest of the guys. Seonghwa and Yeosang had their jaws dropped while Hongjoong smirked in victory, proud of his handiwork. 

“You look ravishing, Y/N.” Seonghwa gushed and you giggled as he picked you up and spun you around. 

“You l-look good I mean g-great I mean stunning I mean uh…” Yeosang stumbled over his words and simply patted your shoulder to which you also giggled at. 

“I still got it.” Hongjoong said proudly and you smiled brightly at him while Jongho drooled over how beautiful you looked in the suit. After a minute or two, Seonghwa spoke up.

“Ready to visit the rulers of Clubs?”

[eli0004]

since you don't do sub content, could you do something fluffy with jean? anything if you want

Anon, your wish is my command! 🖤

Dating Jean Kirstein-

Synopsis: Headcannons for a Modern AU! Version of your favorite horse boy (Fem!reader)

Rating: SFW

Warnings: one slightly suggestive hc, implied body image issues, jean has a history of toxic relationships

Ok, so first of all, Jean isn’t your typical boyfriend. He’s boyfriend: Feminist Edition✨ and body positivity king, hello?

He’s also, as we all know, a huge simp. This man will do anything for his woman

Because of that, he’s had a few really shitty relationships where he was badly taken advantage of, and he always vows to really assess a person’s green AND red flags before proceeding.

It never works out that way, obviously. Bro wouldn’t know a red flag if you shoved it up his ass 🚩. He sees a pretty girl and is suddenly color blind.

Because of his history in that aspect, when you first confess your feelings to each other he’s absolutely terrified that it’s one big joke, or destined to fail.

But as you both get closer, he lets his gaurd down, and bro is down so bad.

You say “jump” an jean says “how high”

He is 110% that guy who notices everything you do with your appearance, but that’s also just because he doesn’t understand the whole “it’s not polite to stare” thing.

Jean when you do literally anything: 👁️👄👁️

He’s a gym bro, change my mind (you can’t 😈)

If you’re insecure Jean is one of those guys that will ask you how much you weigh, and you’ll be like “damn that’s really icky and disrespectful” until you see him placing that exact amount of weight on the bench.

He’s like “see, you’re not too heavy for me” wink wink

He’s so endearingly stupid

This man will worship every curve you’ve got on you.

If you’re not insecure tho, Jean will hype you tf up when you’re feeling confident

“Hell yeah, look at that ass babe!” *smack*

Either way he’s obsessed with you, regardless of what your body looks like or whether or not you like it.

Modern Jean 100% has a minor Fratccent from his college years.

Once or twice, he will accidentally call you bro, but he’ll be so apologetic TT you can’t even be upset.

He’s the type of guy that will walk around with his hand on your ass instead of your waist if you’re ok with that

His shit eating grin when someone mentions it, he’s like 😏😏😏

Scratch his head with your nails, DO IT

This man will be snoring immediately, it’s his favorite way to fall asleep.

I’m also a firm believer that modern!jean is not a natural blonde, so from time to time he’ll let you put streaks of vivid color in it, bonus points if you match with him

He’s actually a pretty good cook, so when you’re feeling homesick he’ll prepare your comfort meals for you

His love languages are physical touch, and words of affirmation. Jean will actually spontaneously combust if you compliment his biceps or tell him he has pretty eyes

He’s also totally comfortable with his masculinity so he’d be thrilled to be involved in your skincare routine, do face masks, let you clean up his brows, put makeup on him etc etc.

In fact, if you’ve had a hard week, he’d be the one to come home with a bottle of wine, face masks, nail polish and snacks. Top tier self care night, would sit on the couch with you and all your plushies and watch love island or something 😭

He gets so into the drama, it’s actually hilarious. By the end of it he’s rolling his eyes and trash talking at the tv

Will get wine drunk and dance in the living room with you

Honestly, we all just need to get ourselves a Jean. 😔💞

[tan1shere]

Ellie Williams x pregnant reader !

A/n: hey guys so this is a lil drabble I did a few months ago possibly- its not perfect but it's cute enough. I used "I" instead of what I normally do which is "you" just- cuz. I think Ellie would be so great during a pregnancy. She'd help you so much, shed be such a sweetheart. Enjoy :)

Warnings: none just fluffy fluff fluff. (And Ellies corny jokes x)

Masterlist

I was just standing in the kitchen, when suddenly. "ELLIE!" I scream as I stand there. Fuck. My water had just broken, and immediately I could feel the contractions. I let out a painful sound/groan as one strikes. I hear her rush down the stairs "babe are you okay?-" She then sees the spot on the floor. "Oh my god SHES COMING" she says with excitement. "No fucking shit Sherlock don't just stand there and gawk grab the bag." I start to walk outside to our car. "I gotta call Joel." I then turn around to grab her face. "Do that later. cuz right now. YOU SHOULD BE CALLING FOR AN AMBULANCE." I breathe out.

"Okay okay deep breaths." I stare at her. "WHAT DO YOU THINK IM DOING?" we soon get into the car as another contraction comes. "Fuck fuck fuck." I say. "Hey no swearing infront of the baby." I turn my head. "so God help me I WILL kick you." She gulps knowing I wasn't playing. We had finally arrived. I was on the bed trying to stay calm when all of a sudden I hear. "Why did the run-on sentence take a pregnancy test?" I huff. "Why." She smirks. "Its period came too late" I glare at her. "Your jokes are never a good time to say what the fuck makes you think now is."

shes still got a cocky grin on her face. "How did Burger King get Dairy Queen knocked up?" "I don't know Ellie what." There was a pause. "He forgot to wrap his whopper!" I let out a groan. "Oh come on that was a good one you can't deny it." "when you hold my hand while your child's being popped out. Best believe you wont have a hand, no. More." she let's out a scoff. "Jeez tough crowd." but she just smiles.

It was time she was coming. I grab ellies hand. "Good lord you weren't kidding." I let out a pained noise trying to stay calm letting out breaths as I push. Here was when ellie was being serious. She rubbed her thumb over my hand, kissing my head as I continue to do this. She was honestly excited to see the process, she wasn't scared of anything although she is scared of spiders. But she dealt with so much gore this thing was nothing. She watches as our daughter starts to come I turn my head noticing she's crying. "People may think im weird for this but it's so lovely."

I immediately melt at her words. Glad she doesn't find this gross. "Its so interesting to watch.." she was so fixated on it. She sees more of her head. Soon enough I was exhausted trying to relax. One of the nurses asks if ellie wanted to cut the cord. She obviously said yes doing so. A lil while later "Hey babe. Knock, knock." I look at her very tired after what I just did. "Who's there?" she then holds up our new born. "Autumn, Williams." I smile like crazy as ellie hands her to me. I hold her in my arms. Amazed that I had just done that. "Our lil girl." I stare at her lovingly. "I gotta text Joel!" She says with pure excitement. I just smile at her, glad to have such and amazing wife like Ellie.

[prettyboypistol]

Mercs first time receiving head?

Male or gender neutral Reader preferred

TF2 Mercs First Time Getting Head || x M!Reader +18

minors dni

Pyro is ambiguous genitals

Scout

In disbelief really, since none of his previous partners were interested in BJs

As soon as you got on your knees and offered, his heart nearly lurched out of his throat.

Def internalizes it as "well you're a guy, so it's gotta be different"

Probably wouldn't reciprocate that's some gay shit right there and Jeremy is NOT gay. especially when another man is sucking him off!

Loves how tight and wet it is

ABSOLUTELY fucks your throat when he gets too into it

Demoman

You two have to leave to the field in ten minutes, but you're both horny

You offer to give Tav head since there's no time for fucking and he enthusiastically agrees

He's very tentative about letting you know that there's no pressure for you to do this often

His favorite part is feeling your moans on his dick

A bit shy when it comes to deepthroating because he "I don't wanna fuck up my boy's throat if he needs to shout for a heal"

Would try to reciprocate at a later date, but he's honestly not that good 3/10 but an A for effort

Pyro

Pyro is very nervous about you giving them oral

Just like the usual fucking with them, no skin is showing except what the open zipper to the flame retardant suit allowed. Even then, their heavy shirt and pants withheld everything that wasn't necessary for sex

You like how vocal they are and how their hands run through your hair

They orgasm HARD. So much cum. As they ride the high, you keep going, only making Pyro sob in pleasure

They offer to let you fuck them as a thank you, even then they beg to at LEAST give you a handjob

God, there's so much Pyro loves about oral, but the intimacy is amazing for them

Engineer

He's a bit frumpy about the idea of "degrading" you like that

UGH he's such a southern gentleman you wanna rail him even more

"Listen hon, I know that it shouldn't feel as intimate as sex but- but your face down there? I dunno."

You assure him that it isn't degrading to you and that you're more than enthusiastic to give him head

He's down to give it a shot, but in the end after 2 minutes you can tell he's just not into it and he profusely apologizes

You spend the rest of the night cuddling your man bc 1. babe it's ok to not like oral and 2. honeyyyy i wasn't objectifieddd

Heavy

Damn. Like, DAMN. He's fucking HUGE

As soon as you see his dick when you two are going to sleep together, you wanna get it in your mouth as a bit of foreplay

You're a size king, but your jaw hurts not even 3 minutes into working down his shaft.

Heavy gives praise as you tirelessly try to take him

"Good job, most can barely take it during sex!"

He's very patient and calm as you suck and swallow around the head and the shaft. no matter what you did you couldn't get him balls deep.

Reciprocation is 5/10, also inexperienced but since your dick is half his size he doesn't have as much trouble

Soldier

Surprisingly one of the most happy to get head

Loves the idea of you sucking him off when he's busy

cockwarming kink 100%%%

He nearly jizzes on the spot with how warm your throat is

Reciprocation game is surprisingly good 6/10

Not mouthy per se, but very grunty/groany when you get him close to orgasm. Def will get noisy if you edge him.

Jane wants to cum on your face but he ain't gonna ask

Medic

God he LOVES the idea of blowjobs, like that's his usual jerk off material

He has an oral fixation, he always liked watching you drink from straws or licking things like icepops

As soon as you offer his eyes light up and he grabs your face to kiss you over and over again

He's so jittery in happiness as you unzip his pants, def doesn't last long

Reciprocation game is great but the overenthusiasm docks points 7/10

Loved the feeling of your tongue, the way it feels makes him white out in pleasure.

Sniper

Sees blowjobs as "Sex but when there's not enough time"

His danger kink just BEGS for you to blow him while he's camping out for an assassination.

Road. Head. Please. Mundy loves the idea of road head.

He's casually bisexual, so he doesn't mind giving head to you as well. Definitely has given head before and knows his way around a cock. 8/10 (-2 bc it feels impersonal)

Mundy's favorite thing about you giving head is how you look up at him. If he's driving then every red light makes him blush bc yes. he's looking. yes, he WILL blush if you make eye contact.

Will remember it for an absurdly long time and WILL bring it up like 5 months later

Spy

you know damn well you're not his first.

He likes the power of you on his knees and ready to please him.

He loves running his hands into your hair and guiding you to how to blow him properly.

Spy will reciprocate and is a 10/10 for practiced grace. However, he threatens to castrate you if you dirty up his mask.

Dirty talks in french if you really go above his expectations

not too noisy or mouthy, but get him riled up enough and he'll mutter french to himself

[trinityobsessesovatings]

do you have a ranking of your favourite arcane characters?

this might come as a little bit of a shocker…

MOST

Caitlyn

Vi

Jayce

Mel

Sevika

Ekko

Jinx

Ambessa

Viktor

LEAST

caitlyn is my absolute FAVORITE character!! idk what it is about her but i want to have her children! i would definitely be her little housewife fr! she has me acting in ways… IM CONCERNED ABOUT. i would definitely be in her corner like “babe stop this isn’t you! look at me baby this isn’t you! don’t let jinx get you there.” …yeah it’s bad.

vi is a VERY CLOSE second. i absolutely ADORED her character. she lowkey reminds me of myself fr, willing to do anything and everything for the ones she loves. i have an older brother who has autism and would DIE for that mf fr! i really loved how even though she was frustrated with jinx… she never really gave up on her… in my eyes at least.

…now… jayce i’m not gonna lie.. he’s position on this list is a SHOCK to me. i was a jayce HATER all throughout the show! mainly because i was jealous with the way he got the baddest bitch in the show mel.. YES IM A HATER! but chileee… when he popped back up with beard… SUMN WAS PURRING 🤪 i’m a slut for mean with beards.

mel, mel, mel… when she first popped up on my screen I was deadass stunned with how stunning that woman was! then when she first started getting with jayce i was like: 🤨😕. i couldn’t believe it. i was also definitely one of those people who shipped her with sevika even though those two NEVER interacted. but yeah her aura was so strong she had me hating jayce. WHEN SHE UNLOCKED HER POWERS OH MY GOD I WAS SCREAMING AND JUMPING FOR JOY! baddest bitch. 😌

sevika was definitely someone else who caught my attention when the show first started! i thought she was THE COLDEST mf they introduced! even when she betrayed vander i was upset a bit, but also at the same time… i supported it??? because she just wants the best for her people! i was literally so pissed she kept getting that vegeta treatment tho… LIKE COME ON!

NOW the only reason ekko is so low on this list is because… most of the people above him they got EXTRA POINTS because i’m attracted to them! ekko is honestly so adorable and just the goat fr! that’s my son fr! little man when he was so small 🥹 MY SON!!! i was having heart palpitations when him, hiemerdinger, and jayce where glitching out during the wild runes scene! MY BOY JUST WANTED TO KNOW WHAT WAS WRONG WITH HIS TREE!

the reason jinx is where she is on this list is literally the same as ekko’s! jinx and ekko idk how they are so that’s an immediate “you’re my child and if anything happens to you, i’ll kill everyone.” jinx was also one of them characters that deadass HAD ME DYING! the scene with enforcer not believing she’s jinx, when silco was calling for her but she was too busy jamming, when she jumped sevika and tied her up, asking her sister if her caitlyn fucked before she killed them, almost crashing out when viktor called her powder… THE LIST GOES ON! she an icon, a legend, and she is the moment! 😌

ambessa she had me in the first half, like when she was first introduced! i’m pretty sure if she didn’t end up being an opp… she would definitely be higher on the list! the only thing ambessa got going for her rn is she’s hot! I JUST HATE WAR STARTING/LOVING ASS BITCHES!! like for why! DO THAT SHIT ON YOUR OWN TERF DON’T BRING THAT MESS OVA HEA! also she slapped mel so that DEF docked some fucking points!

now this might be an unpopular opinion… i might get hate for it… i thought viktor was the most boring character on the show highkey fr! IM SORRY IM SORRY! like he had his moments that man is a sassy king… but other than that I didn’t really rock with viktor as a character or as potential boo thing. when it comes to science people… it’s hit or miss for me fr. also… that mf ran a cult 🙅🏾‍♀️ NO THANKS

HONORABLE FAVS

vander

isha

babette

shoola

lest

claggor

cassandra

HONORABLE LEAST FAVS

SILCO

that rat looking mf

MADDIE

mylo

that guy who was in sevika’s gang who was also licking something or someone